Aptavani 12 P

Author(s): Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation
Catalog link: https://jainqq.org/explore/008836/1

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AtmAnubhavanI zreNIo prakAze AptavANIo... A AptavANInuM pustaka to ora ja jAtanuM.che anubhava vANI koI dahADoya hoya ja nahIMne ! adhyAtmana anubhavanuM pustaka hoI zake nahIM. te A AptavANIo anubhava ja che. draSTAMto ja anubhavanA che. ame DuMgarana upara rahIne badhuM DuMgaranuM varNana karyuM che. koI jo pUrepUro anubhava bahAra paDelo ja nathI. kAraNa ke a lokone anubhavanA sTezane AvIne 'anubhava zuM 'che eTalo thoDo bhAga bahAra paDyo che ne bIjo badho aNNA anubhava kahevAnuM baMdha thaI gayuM che. jyAre ApaNI a AptavANI to pUrNa anubhavanI ja vANI che ane a anubhavanI vANI to TheTha sudhI cAlaze. -dAdAzrI AtmavijJAnI e. ema. paTela.' nI mahIM pragaTa thayelA dAdA bhagavAnanA asIma jaya jayakAra ho ts 11897757-5 9789189 725785 & 2 6 9 NI che (pUrvArdha) 55 AptavANI zreNI-12 (pUrvArdha)

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prakAzaka dAdA bhagavAna prarUpita : dAdA bhagavAna phAunDezana vatI zrI ajita sI. paTela 5, mamatApArka sosAyaTI, navagujarAta koleja pAchaLa, usmAnapurA, amadAvAda. : saMpAdakane svAdhIna svarUpajJAna sAkSAtkAra pAmelA akama mArganA mahAtmAo mATe kevaLajJAnanI zreNIo caDhAvato graMtha prata : 5000 varSa : 1999 AtavANI bhAva mUlya : "parama vinaya' ane 'huM kaMI ja jANato nathI', e bhAva ! dravya mUlya : 50 rUpiyA (rAhata dare) zreNI - 12 (pUrvAdhi) prAptisthAna : dAdA bhagavAna phAunDezana 5, mamatApArka sosAyaTI, navagujarAta koleja pAchaLa, usmAnapurA, amadAvAda. phona - (079) 642 1154, 754,408, 7543979 pheksa - 6431278 E-Mail : dimple@ad1.vsnl.net.in lesara kaMpojha : dAdA bhagavAna phAunDezana, amadAvAda saMpAdaka : DaoN. nIrubahena amIta prinTara : mArUti prinTarsa, amadAvAda.

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samarpaNa dhULamAMthI sUkSma tarapha, pesADe bAramInAM Aptavacana; nathI mAtra paThana kAje, mAMge UMDuM parama arthaghaTana ! AjJAonuM mahattva, svacchaMda nirmulana; zIre dAdA laI le mokSa sudhInuM saMrakSaNa ! jJAtA-draSTA saheje saMprApya, zuddha upayoganuM nirAvaraNa; bAramAM guNasthAnadhArIo ! pAmo anaMta bhedI A samajaNa ! pragatinA sopAna caDhAve, zikhare lakSa draDhIkaraNa eka ja zabda pacce maMDAve, mokSanA gabhAre pagaraNa aho aho dAdA ! tamAruM vacanabaLa, zabdezabda bhede AvaraNa; vAmaNI lAge pracaMDa zakti, ajamAvI je "pokharaNa ! trimaMtra jJAnInI jAgRtinI jhalaka, jhUkAve zISa jJAnI caraNa; aho ahonI azrudhArA, vAMcatA na sukAvA de nayana ! bAramuM guThANuM vyavahArathI pAmavA, karo nitya ArAdhana; bAramI AptavANI kAje, mahAtmAone vinavaNa ! jAgRti yajJanI akathya sAmagrIonuM kalekzana; samarpaNa samarpaNa, akrama mahAtmAone samarpaNa ! s

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dAdA bhagavAta phAunDezananA prakAzato . 'dAdA bhagavAna' koNa ? jUna 1958nI e samI sAMjano chaeka vAgyAno samaya, bhIDamAM dhamadhamatAM suratanAM sTezana para beThelA e.ema.paTela rUpI dehamaMdiramAM 'dAdA bhagavAna" saMpUrNapaNe pragaTa thayA ane kudarate saryuM adhyAtmanuM adbhUta Azcarya ! eka kalAkamAM vizvadarzana lAdhyuM ! 'ApaNe koNa ? bhagavAna koNa ? jagata koNa calAve che ? karma zuM ? mukti zuM ? 'I. jagatanAM tamAma AdhyAtmika praznonAM saMpUrNa phoDa paDyA ! emane prApti thaI te ja rIte mAtra be ja kalAkamAM, anyane paNa prApti karAvI ApatAM, emanA adbhUta jJAnaprayogathI ! ene akrama mArga kahyo. krama eTale pagathiye pagathiye, krame krame UMce caDhavAnuM ! akrama eTale krama vinAno, liphaTa mArga ! zorTakaTa !! | teozrI svayaM pratyekane 'dAdA bhagavAna koNa ?' no phoDa pADatA kahetAM ke, "A dekhAya che te 'dAdA bhagavAna' nhoya, ame to jJAnI puruSa chIe ane mahIM pragaTa thayelA che te dAdA bhagavAna che, je caudalokanA nAtha che, e tamArAmAM ya che, badhAmAM ya che. tamArAmAM avyaktarUpe rahelA che ne 'ahIM' saMpUrNapaNe vyakta thayelA che ! huM pote bhagavAna nathI. mArI aMdara pragaTa thayelA dAdA bhagavAnane huM paNa namaskAra karuM chuM." 1. AptavANI - 1 thI 12 17. bhogave tenI bhUla (gu, aM, hiM.) 2. AptasUtra 18. banyuM te nyAya (gu., e., hiM.) 3. huM koNa chuM? 19. eDajasTa evarIvhera (gu, aM., hiM.) 4. pratikramaNa (caM., saM.) 20. athaDAmaNa TALo (gu, aM, hiM.) 5. nijadoSa darzanathI, nirdoSa 21. dAdA bhagavAnanuM AtmavijJAna 6. karmanuM vijJAna 22. vartamAna tIrthaMkara zrI sImaMdhara svAmI 7. ciMtA 23. paisAno vyavahAra (graMtha, saMkSipta) 8. krodha 24. pati-patnIno divya vyavahAra (graM, saM.) 9. prema 25. mA-bApa chokarAMno vyavahAra (graM, saM) 10. ahiMsA 26. samajathI prApta brahmacarya (graM.saM.) 11. camatkAra 27. vANIno siddhAMta (graM., saM.) 12. pApa-puNya 28. mRtyu samaye, pahelAM ane pachI 13. guru-ziSya 29. rAlA mAvAnA AtmavijJAna 14. vANI, vyavahAramAM..... 30. Who am I? 15. satya-asatyanA rahasyo 31. Ultimate Knowledge 16. bhAvanA sudhAre bhavobhava AtmajJAna prAptinI pratyakSa lIMka parama pUjya dAdAzrI gAmegAma-dezavideza paribhramaNa karIne mumukSu jIvone satsaMga tathA svarUpajJAnanI prApti karAvatAM hatAM. teozrIe potAnI hayAtImAM ja pUjya DaoN. nIrubahena amInane AtmajJAna prApti karAvavAnI jJAna siddhi Apela. - parama pUjya dAdAzrInA dehavilaya bAda Aje paNa pUjya DaoN. nIrubahena amIna temanA pagale pagale te ja rIte mumakSa jIvone satsaMga tathA AtmajJAnanI prApti nimitta bhAve karAvI rahyA che, jeno lAbha laIne hajAro mokSArthI saMsAramAM rahIne javAbadArIo pUrI karatAM paNa mukta rahI AtmaramaNatA anubhave che. 'dAdAvANI' megejhina dara mahine prakAzita thAya che,

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saMpAdakIya akrama vijJAnI parama pUjya dAdAzrInA mahAtmAone AtmajJAna prApta thayuM che. have kevaLajJAna sudhInI prAptinI kSapaka zreNIo mAMDavAnI che. saMsAranI bAkInI javAbadArIo pUrI karatAM karatAM eTale ke nizcayamAM rahIne zeSa vyavahAra pUro karatAM karatAM TheTha kevaLajJAnane pAmavAnuM che. pUjyazrIe Thera Thera mahAtmAonI vyavahAranI mUMjhavaNo, AjJAmAM rahevAnI muzkelIo temaja sUkSma jAgRtimAM kaI rIte rahevuM tenA khulAsAo karelA che. vidha vidha ThekANethI vidha vidha nimittonA AdhIna vANI nIkaLelI tene TeparekarDamAM jhIlelI che. pachI oNDiyo keseTomAMthI dAdAnI vANIne utArI, vikharAyelA maNakAonI mALA parovI che ! mahAtmAone mokSapaMtha para pragati mATe khUba ja upayogI nivaDaze. vAMcatA ja keTalIya vastuono aMdarathI ughADa thaI jAya che. parama pUjya dAdAzrI ja ApaNane pratyakSa kahetA hoya tema lAge che. sujJa vAcakoe dAdAnA priyapAtra 'caMdu'nI jagyAe potAnuM ja nAma mUkI vAMcavuM. caMdu eTale nAmadhArI, ApaNe pote ja. vAkye vAkye 'huM caMdu chuM'nI mAnyatAmAMthI 'huM zuddhAtmA ja chuM', 'akartA ja chuM', 'kevaLa jJAtA-draSTA ja chuM'. AtmA sivAyanuM bIjuM badhuM ja 'nhoya mAruM'. bIjuM badhuM pAchaLa cArja kareluM, tenuM DiscArja ja che. bharelo mAla ja nIkaLe che, emAM navA kaoNjhijha utpanna koI saMjogomAM thatAM ja nathI, mAtra iphekTone ja tame 'juo' cho. A ThokI ThokIne kahevAyuM che. vAMcatA vAMcatA mahIM AnuM jabarajasta draDhIkaraNa thaI jAya che. jJAna maLyA pachI mahAtmAone niraMtara pAMca AjJAmAM rahevA sivAya bIjuM kaMI ja karavAnuM rahetuM nathI. kAraNa ke tIrthaMkaroe zuM kahyuM che ? AjJA e ja dharma ane AjJA e ja tapa. pachI bIjAM koI tapa karavAnAM rahetAM nathI. A pAMca AjJA jJAna lIdhelA mahAtmAo mATe ja che, anyane phAyadAkAraka nathI. pAMca AjJAmAM ekjhekTa rahe, te bhagavAna mahAvIra jevI dazAne pAme ! ekAvatArI padane pAme ! hA, pAMca AjJAo prajJAthI pALavAnI che, buddhithI nahIM. buddhithI AjJA pALelI karmomAMthI choDAvI nahIM zake ! mahAtmAoe prastuta AptavANInA pUrvArdha ne uttarArdhano talasparzI 'sTaDI' karavAno che. aMdarano ughADa nA thAya tyAM sudhI manana-ciMtana temaja 7

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satsaMgamAM pratyakSa prazno pUchIne paNa choDavAnuM nathI. DIpa sTaDI(UMDo abhyAsa) karavAno che. vANI vAMcatAM aho aho aho thaI jAya che ne 'jJAnI puruSa' daraasala kevA hoya, tenI yathArtha samaja UbhI thaI jAya che. potAne kahevaDAvatA jJAnIo, zuSkajJAnIonI vANI sAthe dAdAnI vANI sarakhAvatAM ja khabara paDI jAya ke asalI hIrA ne kAcamAM keTalo pharaka ?!!! AvA ekkekTa phoDa ATalI sUkSmatAnI sacoTa samaja kyAMya khullI thayelI jovA maLatI nathI. dhanya che A ajoDa 'jJAnI puruSa'ne ! 'na bhUto na bhaviSyati' e sArthaka kare che emanA anubhavone vAMcIne ! ThekaThekANe pote kaI rIte jAgRtimAM, zuddha upayogamAM, judApaNAmAM temaja vItarAgatAmAM rahe che, tenA anubhavanuM varNana karyuM che. je ApaNane lakSa baMdhAvAmAM ane ApaNe kyAM bhUla khAIe chIe, te samajavAmAM dIvAdAMDI sama banI rahe che ! tyAre hRdaya "aho aho'nA bhAvathI bharAIne pokArI UThe che, 'dAdA, dhanya che tamane ! A kALanA sarvasva rIte hatabhAgI lokone Ape A adbhuta AptavANI ardhI mokSanI prApti ati ati ati sulabha karI dIdhI che !" A kALanA adhyAtmanA zikhare pahoMcelAnI saMpUrNa anubhava vANI vAMcatA, bIjI badhI kanphayUjha karanArI vANI vAMcavAnA bhAramAMthI mukta karI de che ne 'dAdAvANI' hAthamAM AvatAM ja hAtha-paga ne haiyuM thana thana nAcavA maMDI jAya che !!! mahAtmAone eka khAsa lAlabattI dharavAnuM rokI zakAtuM nathI. parama pUjya dAdAzrInI vANI vyavahAralakSI temaja nizcayalakSI, bannenI che. have vANInI sImA evI che ke eTa e TAIma be vyu poInTane kliyara nA karI zake ! jema biliyarDamAM eka sTrokathI aneka bola gabbImAM naMkhAya tema ahIM vANIthI nathI thaI zakatuM. eTa e TAIma eka ja vAta nIkaLe. tethI jyAre nizcayanI vANI nIkaLe che tyAre kevaLa AtmamAM ja sthira rahevAne arthe kahevAmAM Ave che ke caMdubhAInuM game tevuM AcaraNa bane, toye tame zuddha ja cho zuddhAtmA ja che. ane te sivAyanA ekeeka paramANuo 'joya mArAM', DiscArja ja che, navuM cArja mahAtmAone thAya ja nahIM." I. I. kahe che. vAstavikatAmAM e karekTa ja che, paNa vyavahAranI vAta Ave tyAre caMdubhAIne "kaI jAgRtimAM rahevuM te paNa kahyuM che. Adarza vyavahAra kevo hoya ? koIneya gharamAM-bahAra kyAMya duHkharUpa nA thAya tevo ! koIne duHkha thAya to caMdubhAIe pratikramaNa karavuM paDe. tyAM satya hakIkata che ke e caMdubhAInuM DiscArja ja che paNa caMdubhAInA sAmI vyakti mATenA roMga abhiprAyane toDavA, tenA paDaghA pyaoNra karavA caMdubhAI pAse pratikramaNa karAvavuM ne 'huM zuddhAtmA ja chuM, mAre pratikramaNa karavAnuM nathI paNa caMdue to karavuM ja paDe'. nahIM to durupayoga thaze ne vyavahAra bagaDaze ne jeno vyavahAra bagaDyo, teno nizcaya bagaDavAno ja. have mahAtmAo dAdAnI nizcayavANI ekAMte laI le agara to vyavahAravANI ekAMte laI le to ghaNo goTALo thaI jaze ane gADI kaye gAma jatI rahe, tenI khabara nA rahe. akrama vijJAnanuM tAraNa TUMkamAM zuM che ? 'huM zuddhAtmA ja chuM', kevaLa jJAtA-draSTA ja chuM ane je potAnA jIvanamAM banI rahyuM che e pAchalo bharelo mAla nIkaLI rahyo che, ene 'joyA' karavAnuM che. have tyAM kyAM bhUla thAya che ? (1) bharelo mAla che tenI khabara nA paDI to pUrI khoTa. (2) khabara paDI eTale jANyuM ke A bharelo mAla che paNa tene juduM joyuM nahIM to pArziyala khoTa, AmAM e bhUlane cAlavA de che. virodhamAM paDato nathI. eTale e jovA-jANavAmAM kyAre cUkI javAze e khabara nahIM paDe. (3) "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e sivAyanuM je kaMI paNa nIkaLe che, bharelo mAla nIkaLe che. tene judo jANavAno ne jovAno eTaluM ja nahIM paNa sAthe sAthe ApaNo prajJA taraphathI sTroMga virodha harasamaye hovo ja joIe ke "A khoTuM che, A nA hovuM joIe to ApaNe jItyA ne bharelo mAla ghara khAlI karIne jAya. ghaNIvAra 'bharelo mAla che" ema juduM joyA kare, jANyA kare paNa thoDIka ja vAramAM buddhi avaLacaMDI pAchI kyAre bhUlathApa khavaDAvI deze, tenI khabara nahIM paDe. eTale khyAlamAM raheze ke A 'bharelo mAla che. paNa buddhi calaNamAM AvIne khyAlane khyAlamAM rahevA devAne badale pote ja sarvesarvA banI jaze. pariNAme sUkSmathI mAMDIne sthULa sudhInA bhogavaTAmAM mUkI deze ! chatAMya AnAthI navuM cArja to nathI ja thatuM, paNa jUnuM pUruM DiscArja thatuM nathI ne Atmasukha hoIe chIe eTalo samaya. A badhAmAMthI ekjhakTanesamAM rahevA ATalI sAdI, saraLa ne sahelAmAM sahelI cAvI vAparyA karaze to akramanI liphaTamAM saDasaDATa ekAvanArI

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pada pAmI moze pahoMcI javAze, geranTIthI ! e cAvI kaI ? bharelA mAlano virodha karyo eTale tanmayAkAra thavAnI zakyatA UDI. pachI caMdu je kaMI kare, sAruM kare, kharAba kare, koI rUpALI strI joIne mahIMlI TAMkaNIo hAlI UThe jema lohacuMbaka AgaLa bane tema, toya paNa te DiscArja che, paramANuonuM galana ja che, "mAruM svarUpa hoya' e ane ApaNe virodha karyo ja rAkhavAno. ATalI jAgRtimAM satata rahevAthI cokkasapaNe badho mAla khAlI thaI ja jAya che. akramanI ATalI samajaNa jene kAyama mATe phITa thaI gaI, te jJAnIonI jema niraMtara nirAkuLatAmAM, jIvanamukta dazAmAM AvAM kALamAM paNa jIve zake che ne mokSane eka ja avatAramAM pAmI zake che. je hakIkata che. pUjyazrIe eka jagyAe kahyuM che ke caMdubhAI kharAba kAma kare ke sAruM kAma kare, bannene 'joyA karo. kAraNa ke jonArAne doSa nathI, kharAbasAruM nathI. jonAro jJAna prakAza svarUpe che. jema lAITane phUla sugaMdhIta karatuM nathI ke kAdava kharaDatuM nathI, durgadha pesADatuM nathI, tema AtmA sArAkharAba kAmamAM nirlepa che. eTale huM evo nirlepa chuM, paNa caMdubhAIthI kharAba thaI jAya to tene juduM rAkhIne pratikramaNa karAvavuM athavA Thapako Apavo. caMdubhAI nirlepa rahe te guno che. AtmA eTale ke pote nirlepa che. eTale Ama nizcayAtmaka vANI ne vyavahArAtmaka vANInuM suMdara belensa karyuM che. Ama koI vAta ekAMta nathI. mokSe javuM hoya to vyavahAra ane nizcaya, rileTiva ane riyala banne pAsAM sarakhA rahe to ja zakya bane. AmAM durupayoga thAya to lAbha nA maLe ne khoTa jAya. vaLI vyavahAramAM badhAM karmone DiscArja kahyAM paNa aNahakkanAM viSayo, mAMsAhAra, dArU - A traNano niSedha kahyo che. e haze tyAM sudhI mokSanI ke dharmanI vAta nA hoya tyAM. eTale samagra rIte samaje tyAre pragati maMDAya tema che, ekAMte nahIM. ghaNI vAra vyavahAra prathama pachI nizcaya evuM samajIne mahAtmAo phAIlono nikAla karavAno to kahyo ja chene ema karIne sagavaDIyuM laIne potAnA e phAIla pratyenA mohane chAvare che. Ama karIne satsaMgamAM AvavAnuM TALe che. dAdAe phAIla eTale polIsavALo daMDA mArIne mAMsa khavaDAve to tene phAIla kahI.. A to game che ne karIe chIe" ne phAIlano nikAla karIe chIe, ema kahIe, tene jJAnano durupayoga thayo gaNAya. parama pUjya dAdAzrInI apUrva vANI dravya-kSetra-kALa ne bhAva ane nimittane AdhIna sahajapaNe nIkaLelI che. sujJa vAcakane kyAMka temAM truTi ke virodhAbhAsa lAge, paNa hakIkatamAM jJAnInuM ekeya veNa virodhAbhAsavALuM nA hoya. mokSamArga e vyaktigata siMcanano mArga che. vyakti vyaktinI prakRtine khapAvavA tenI prakRtinuM jema che tema skrInIMganI jema joIne pUjyazrI tene samajaNa phITa karAvatA. e emanI ajAyaba zakti hatI ! prastuta graMthamAM judI judI prakRtinuM juduM juduM mAraNa dekhADyuM che tyAM kadAca virodhAbhAsa bhAse ! jema so dardIone tAva ekasarakho ja 104 no hoya, paNa anubhavI DaoNkTara darekane judI judI davA Ape - koIne meleriyAnI, to koIne TAIphoIDanI, to koIne vAyarasanI, to koIne kiDanI invekzananI ! sAmAnya mANasane AmAM virodhAbhAsa lAge ke nA lAge ?! pUjyazrIe kyAreka koI vyaktie bhAre guno karyo hoya ane Ama sTroMga mAInDano hoya to tene pote potAne jabarajasta Thapako ApavAno kahyo. to vaLI koIne kahyuM, 'Thapako ApavAnI jarUra nathI, pratikramaNa karI leje.' te bahu sensiTIva ke DipresIva necarano hoya tenA mATe, nahIM to bahu pako Ape to menTala DiprezanamAM jato rahe ! vaLI jJAnanI ucca kakSAnI vAtamAM kahyuM che ke jJAtA-draSTA rahe, tene pratikramaNeya karavAnI jarUra nathI. have jJAtA-draSTA rahevAtuM nA hoya ne A vAkya ekAMte, svacchede pakaDIne 'pratikramaNa karavAnI jarUra nathI mAre' karIne cAle to kyAM jaIne paDe e ?! hajAro mahAtmAo sAthe vIsa varasamAM ThekaThekANe nIkaLelI vANIne jhIlIne eka ja pravAhamAM lAge tema saMkalita karavAnA prayAso thayA che. sujJa vAcakane kyAMya kaMI kSati lAge to te saMkalananI khAmIne kAraNe che, nahIM ke jJAnInI vANI kSativALI che. jJAnInuM eka eka vAkya to traNe kALe koI chekI nA zake evuM hoya ! pUjyazrInI vANI sahajapaNe carotarI taLapadI bhASAmAM nIkaLelI che. tene jema che tema ja rAkhavAmAM AvI che, jethI zrImukhe nIkaLelI vANInI vAstavikatA vikRti vinA jaLavAI rahe. ane tenI mIThAza, tenI hRdayabhedI asaronI to vAta ja kaMI ora chene ! e to je mANe te ja jANe ! DaoN. nIrubahena amIta to

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upoddhAta - DaoN. nIrubahena amIta [1.1] AtmajAgRti jAgRti eTale caMdubhAI (vAcake caMdubhAInI jagyAe potAnuM nAma samajavuM) zuM kare che, ene jANe-jue e. A jAgRti nA hoya to tene UMdhe che kahyuM, jagata AkhuM Ama UMdhei ja che. hitAhitanuM, A bhava-parabhavanuM bhAna ja nA hoya, ene UMdhe che kahevAya. akrama vijJAnathI AtmA jANyA pachI 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evI jAgRti niraMtara rahe che. e jAgRti pachI jatI ja nathI. jAgRta mANasa potAnA ja doSa jue, pArakAnA doSa jue ja nahIM e jJAnInI kRpA prApta karI le ! jJAna maLe eTale 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM'nI jAgRti niraMtaranI AvI jAya che. chatAMye e chelve sTezana - bombe senTrala nathI paNa muMbaInuM paDyuM - borivalI AvyuM hoya enA jevuM paheluM sTezana che. AtmajJAnathI parAMnI zarUAta thAya che. AjJAmAM rahevAthI jAgRti vadhe ane jAgRti vadhe tema AjJA vadhu paLAya. mahAtmAne AjJA pALavAnI khUba icchA hoya paNa karmo mUMjhave, tethI puruSArtha kAco paDI jAya. jAgRti e iphekTa nathI, e to puruSArtha che ! e koInI DipenDanTa nathI, svataMtra che. jAgRti e ja AtmA ne ajAgRti e pudgala. pUrNa jAgRti thaye svasattAno anubhava thAya, te pahelAM nahIM. parama pUjya dAdAzrI potAnI jAgRtinA anubhava kahe che ke "kRSNa bhagavAnanuM ke mahAvIra bhagavAnanuM nAma letAM ja emanuM joyeluM citra dekhAya ane emanuM mULa svarUpa paNa dekhAya ane zabdo paNa bolAya. parama pUjya dAdAzrIne ko'ke pUchayuM ke vyavahAramAM jAgRti kevI rIte Apane helpa kare ? dAdAzrIe kahyuM ke ame kyAreya upayoga nA cUkIe. amAro dIvo kAyama jalato ja hoya. kevaLajJAna thatAM pahelAM tIrthaMkarone je nijadoSo dekhAya, te amane dekhAya. parama pUjaya dAdAzrI pArakAnA doSa kyAreya nA jue. koIkanI moTI blaDara(bhUla) thatI hoya to Takora kare. tema chatAMye te nA ja pAcho vaLe to pachI pote kazuM ja nA kahe. emano prinsipala hato ke kahevAthI zabdamAM rahI jAya, kaheluM thiyarImAM gayuM kahevAya, potAne bhUla samajAya ne anubhavamAM Ave to e prekTikalamAM Ave te sAcuM. eTale koIne sudhAravA nA jAya. bahu ja najIkanA samarpitane kyAreka Takora kare. bAkI dAdAnI caraNavidhio. satsaMga, sevA, sAnidhyathI ja jAgRti vadhatI jAya. jJAnInA sAnidhyamAM jAgRti jabarajasta vadhe ! dAdAzrInI bahAranI sTeja 356deg ne mahIM pUrNa 360nI che, jene pUrNa bhagavAna, dAdA bhagavAna kahIe chIe. pAMca AjJAnA puruSArthathI jAgRti vadhatI vadhatI phula thAya ne kevaLajJAna thAya ! jAgRtithI upayoga rahe ne upayogathI pharI jAgRti rahe. jAgRtine Topa para laI javI, enuM nAma zuddha upayogae ja puruSArtha dharma have ! jAgRtinI sUkSmatA Ave, pachI ethI AgaLa badhAM ja AvaraNo bhede tyAre. AtmA asaMvedanamAM Ave. svasaMvedana pahelAM Ave ne pachI vadhatuM vadhatuM spaSTavedana thaI jAya ! jJAna maLyA pachI jAgRtinI zarUAta thaI jAya che. ane saMparNa jAgRti eTale kevaLa jAgRti ja, e ja kevaLajJAna, e ja khuda paramAtmA ! dAdAzrI kahe che ke ame khuda paramAtmAnI sAthe vAtacIta karIe. dAdAzrI kahe che je rastethI huM caDhyo chuM tyAM tame AvI rahyA cho ! jAgRti vadhe zI rIte ? jJAna maLyA pachI jAgatA thAya. pachI dAdAnI pAMca AjJA pALe, tenAthI jAgRti vadhatI jAya. ane pAMca AjJA vadhAre pALavA zuM karavuM ? satsaMgamAM AvIne pratyakSa jJAnInA AzIrvAda levA, temanAM darzana karavA, vidhio karavI, enAthI AjJA vadhAre paLAya. TUMkamAM UMghatA joDe besavAthI UMghI javAya ane jAgRta joDe hoya to jhokuM AvatuM hoya toya te UDI jAya ! jJAnI para ke jJAnInA mahAtmA upara rAga thAya, ene prazasta rAga kahyo. enAthI saMsArano moha ghaTe ne jAgRti vadhe ! eTale jJAnIthI dUra rahevAya, te jAgRtine aTakAvanAruM kAraNa banI rahe che. e mATe nizcaya pAko kara kara karavo ke jJAnInA sAnidhyamAM ja rahevuM che. je bAjuno nizcaya hoya e bAju ja 'vyavasthita' laI jAya evo niyama che. 12

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asAmAnya vyakti ja prakRtithI lAcAra nA hoya, bIjAM badhA hoya ! rojIMdA jIvanamAM jAgRti kaI rIte Ave ? vyavahAra kliyara hoya, koI AMgaLI nA kare evo hoya tyAre. vyavahAramAM vyavahArika thAya to jAgRti sArI Ave. jJAtA-draSTA padamAM rahe, eno vyavahAra zuddha ja hoya. jJAtAdraSTA rahyo eno nizcaya nizcayamAM rahyo, ne vyavahAra vyavahAramAM rahyo. vyavahAramAM pachI zarIranuM ne badhuM ja dhyAna barAbara rahe. dhyAna citta rAkhe che, AtmA nahIM. eTale mukhya nizcayanI jarUra che ! vaLI jema phAIlo ochI thatI jAya tema jAgRti vadhe. jAgRti kone vadhe che ? AtmAne ? nahIM. AtmAne nahIM, paNa jene bhrAMti che tene jAgRti vadhI ! bhAre karmanA udaya hoya tyAre jAgRti maMda thAya, jema cAra iMcanI pAIpamAMthI pANI paDatuM hoya to AMgaLI khasI jAya ane aDadhA iMcanI pAIpathI nA khase ! saMsAramAM moha hoya, tenAthI jAgRti baMdha thaI jAya. paropakArI lokone ajJAna dazAmAM jAgRti nA rahI zake, ThaMDaka hoya tethI ane jenA jIvanamAM kaDavAza che, ene jJAna maLyA pachI UMcI jAgRti hoya. ene kaMI ora prakAranI ThaMDaka thAya ! pratikULatA e AtmAnuM viTAmIna che ne anukULatA e dehanuM viTAmIna che ! jAgRti ane puNyane zo saMbaMdha ? puNyathI satsaMganA, jJAnInA sAnidhyanAM, sevAnAM saMjoga bAjhe. paNa nizcaya kare ke mAre have jAgRtimAM ja rahevuM che, puruSArtha karavo ja che e puNyathI paranI vAta che, e puruSArtha che. puNyathI nahIM paNa puruSArthathI, nizcayathI jAgRti vadhe ! paNa inaDAyarekTalI puchya helpa kare, jAgRtine puSTi ApanArA, satsaMganA saMjogone bhegA karI ApavAmAM ! A rIte jAgRti ne puNyane InaDAyarekTa saMbaMdha che. A dehane garamI lAge che ane akaLAmaNa thAya che, te garamI kone thAya che ? dehane ke manane ? manane. dehane kazuM nahIM. buddhi dekhADe eTale mana cAlu thaI jAya ! buddhi nA kahe to kazo vAMdho nahIM. eTale pratikULatAanukULatA e UMdhI goThavaNIne kAraNe ja che. rAtre sUtI vakhate dAdAnuM nididhyAsana karatAM karatAM, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM, huM 14 zuddhAtmA chuM...' ema bolatAM bolatAM sUI jaIe e kevA prakAranI jAgRti kahevAya ? ene AtmAno khyAla AkhI rAta rahyo kahevAya. ethI AgaLanI jAgRti eTale dIvo olavAya ja nahIM. mananA kAyama jJAtAdraSTA rahevAya. vicAra AvatAM pahelAM ja samajAya ke A to jJeya che ne huM jJAtA chuM. jJAna maLyA pachI ajAgRta rahe, enI jokhamadArI keTalI ? jhokAM Ave eTalI. 'joyA' vagara gayuM, te pharI joIne cokhkhuM karavuM paDaze, eTalI jokhamadArI rahe che. AtmA chUTo rahevAthI navuM karma to baMdhAtuM ja nathI, paNa jUnA pUrA nA thAya eTale sillakamAM bAkI rahyA ! te pharI cokhkhA karavAnA rahyA ! [1.2] judApaNAtI jAgRti pote potAnI jAtathI, caMdubhAIthI judo kyAre anubhavAya ? caMdubhAI pahelA naMbaranA pADozI che evuM niraMtara khyAlamAM rahe. pachI ciMtAmukta dazA rahe. Adhi-vyAdhi ne upAdhimAM samAdhi rahe ! caMdubhAI zuM kare che tene jANavuM. AtmA AtmAnI pharaja bajAve ne caMdubhAI caMdubhAInI ! caMdubhAI keTalA sArA che ne keTalA kharAba che e AtmA jANyA pachI niSpakSapAtapaNe pote badhuM ja jANe ! dAdAzrI kahetA ke koI Amane kahe ke, "tame akkala vagaranAM cho !' to jJAnamAM rahIne pote zuM kahe ? tamane to Aje AnI khabara paDI paNa huM to nAnapaNathI paTelane oLakhuM ne ! enAmAM akkala ochI ja che pahelethI !' kevI adbhuta judApaNAnI A jAgRti kahevAya ! tame AtmA ane caMdubhAI pudgala, beu judA ja che. DiphekTa caMdubhAImAM, AtmAmAM nahIM. DiphekTane jANe e AtmA ! dehane tAva Ave ke pakSAghAta thAya ke bhaDake baLe, paNa e khoTa pudgalane, mane nahIM ! ApaNane koI dahADo khoTa jatI ja nathI. beu juduM ja che ! ApaNA evAM keTalAMya mahAtmAonA anubhava che ke pakSAghAta thayA pachI pathArIvaza dazAmAM loko khabara jovA Ave tyAre mahAtmA jovA AvanArane kahe, 'tame jene juo cho, tene huM paNa jouM chuM !' lAkha mANasa Dipresa karavA Ave paNa ApaNane Diprezana nA Ave. Diprezana Ave to caMdubhAIne Ave. caMdubhAI jarA DhIlA thaI gayA hoya to temane arIsA sAme laI jaIne jarA khabho thAbaDI Apavo ne kahevuM, 'caMdu, huM chuMne 15

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karI rahyuM che e badhAMne sarva rIte jANe ane jue. ane mahAtmAone eTaluM nA rahe to caMdubhAI haratA-pharatA hoya te judA dekhAya, caMdubhAInuM AkhuM zarIra dekhAya. jema ApaNe bIjA badhAMne judAM joIe chIe ema caMdubhAIne paNa judA ja haratA-pharatA joI zakIe Akho dahADo, toya vItarAga thavA mAMDe, bahArano bhAga eTale dehanI kriyAonA bhAgane judo jue. jIvatA nA hoIe e rIte rahevuM ! caMdubhAI dareka kriyAmAM judA dekhAvA joIe. pahelAM samajaNathI judA dekhAya pachI dhIme dhIme AkRtithI judA dekhAya. parama pUjya dAdAzrI potAnI jAgRtinI vAta karatAM kahe che, "ghaNAM mane kahe ke dAdAjI tame yaMga dekhAo cho. to huM ya arIsAmAM jouM ane maneya yaMga dekhAya. badhAM kahe tenI asara thAya nahIM. 'huM paiDo chuM" evuM huM kyAreya boluM nahIM, mAnuM nahIM. kAraNa ke huM zuddhAtmA chuM'. ane jevuM bolazo tevA thaI javAze. tArI joDe ! tuM zuM karavA phikara kare che ! tuM tAruM kAma karyuM jA !" ATaluM kahezo to badhAMya bhUtAM bhAgI jaze ! caMdubhAIne jelamAM laI javA Ave to ApaNe kahIe, 'laI jAva caMdune, hAthakaDI lAvyA cho ? ghera to mAre jAte uThIne bAraNAM vAsavAM paDatAM hatA, ahIM to polIsavALo vAsI Ape che ! kevo vaibhava che !' AtmAne du:kha hoya ja nahIM. ane je cetanapakSI pudgala thayuM, teneya duHkha nA rahe. cetana virodhI pudgala che tyAM sudhI aDacaNa che ! zeTha lagnamAM be dahADA bahAragAma gayA hoya ne munImane soMpyuM hoya badhuM, to ene khoTa dhaMdhAmAM jAya to munImane zuM levAdevA? napho thAya toya munImane zuM levAdevA ? evuM zuddhAtmAne caMdubhAI joDe kazAyamAM kaMI levAdevA nathI rahetI ! akrama mArgamAM mahAtmAone 'huM chUTTo ja chuM' evo anubhava rahe, jyAre kramika mArgamAM jJAnIone 'huM chUTTo chuM evuM bhAse che" evuM rahe ! AtmadraSTi thayA pachI game te vartana thAya chatAM baMdhana hoya nahIM. vartana konuM ? draSTi konI ? banne bhinna ja che ! pachI zuM coMTe ? ane AjJA pALe, ene baMdha nA paDe. jAgRti mahIM cetava cetava kare ! 'ApaNe kharA chIe' ema karIne keTalIya vAra ApaNI jAtanuM rakSaNa karIe chIe. zuddhAtmA thayA bAda caMduno pakSa levAya ? zuddhAtmA thayA pachI indriyone vaza karAya ? pachI indriyone vaza karanAro rahyo ja kyAM ? have je rahyuM te no kaSAya, tene jANyA karavAnuM. tanmayAkAra thAya to bhogavaTo Avane ! vyavahAramAM vAto karavI ane AtmAmAM rahevuM - e be eTa e TAIma jJAnIne ja rahe. 'huM bolato nathI' evuM bhAna jJAnIne svAbhAvika rahe. have koI paNa saMjogomAM AtmA caMdubhAI thaI ja nA zake ! AtmajJAna thayA pachI pudgala pudgalanI mojamAM ne AtmA AtmAnI mojamAM to ja aMtarasama zreNI rahe ! cImaLAyelAM kaMtAyelA pudgalane mokSamAM 'no enTrI", mokSamAM to galolAM jevAM gulAbI gAlavALAone ja enTrI maLe ! AtmajJAna pahelA A siddhAMta lAgu nathI paDato. jJAtA-draSTAnI UMcAmAM UMcI dazA kaI ? mana-buddhi-citta-ahaMkAra badhuM zuM 16 caMdubhAInI tabiyata bagaDI hoya to ApaNe aMdarakhAne jANavuM ke tabiyata caMdubhAInI bagaDI che, mArI to nahIM ja. tabiyata sArI che kahezo to sArI raheze. jevuM catave tevuM thaI jAya evo niyama che ! 'huM judo ne caMdu judA ! pote ekarUpa thavuM ja nahIM kyAreya paNa. ApaNe caMdu mATe bolavAmAM ya judo vyavahAra rAkhavo. 'caMdune bhUkha lAgI, caMdune khAvuM che, caMdue khAvAnuM banAvyuM, caMdune samajaNa paDI, caMdune samajaNa nA paDI." AvI bhASA rAkhavI. pote paramAtmA ne caMdu pADozI, phAIla naM. 1. AnI vacce bhedarekhA bhedajJAnathI dAdA nAkhI Ape che. pachI be bhAga jude judA ja rahe che. A mAruM khetara ne peluM pADozInuM khetara ema vaheMcaNI ekavAra thaI gaI hoya pachI e bhUlAya ? mana-vacana-kAyAnA bhAvone mArA kahyA to badhuM tophAna macI jAya ane 'nhoya mArAM' kahetAM ja badhuM tophAna baMdha ! dhobI UMghamAMthI UThADIne kahe ke, 'tame A zAla je oDhI che te pAchI Apo' paNa koI nA Ape pAchI. paNa bIjI zAla dekhADe ke "juo, A tamArI che" to tarata ja ApI de ne potAnI laI lene ?! potAnuM nijaghara dekhe pachI paragharamAM koNa besI rahe ? nijaghara joyuM nathI, tyAM sudhI ja bhAMjagaDa che badhI. eka jaNe dAdAzrIne pUchyuM ke tame tamArA pADozIne kevI rIte juo cho ? tyAre pUjyazrIe javAba Apyo, 'sarasa rIte joIe. e. ema. paTela bahu

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sArA mANasa che, emane huM nAnapaNathI jANuM, emanI koI bAbatanI kyAreya kazI Dakhala nahIM. khAvAmAM, pIvAmAM, UThavAmAM, UMghavAmAM koI herAnagati nahIM. koIneya, are hIrAbAneya koI dahADo e pajavatA nathI.' AvI sthiti mahAtmAonI kyAre Ave ? sva ane para beu juduM dekhAya. "A huM ne A hoya huM ATaluM ja majabUta karI levAnuM che ane pAMca AjJAmAM rahevAnuM che. koI caMdubhAIne kaiDakAve to tenuM pratikramaNa karI le, to te phAIla thaI gaI cokhkhI ! ne pratikramaNa nA kare to bAkI rahyuM. koI prasaMgamAM caMdubhAIne jovAne badale pote caMdubhAI thaI jAya, to te gAphela thaI gayA kahevAya. tyAM pachI caMdubhAIthI judA paDavAnuM. pachI caMdubhAIne cetavavAnuM, jAgRta karavAnuM. caMdubhAIthI kaMI khoTuM kAma thaI jAya to caMdubhAIne teno kheda to thavo ja joIe. zuddhAtmA tene jANyA kare. te caMdubhAIne zuddhAtmA hiMmata Ape. khabho thAbaDIne kahevAnuM, "ame chIene tamArI joDe ! cAlo darzana karo, zaktio mAMgo !' judApaNAnI jAgRti utpanna karAvato eka prasaMga nIrubahenane parama pUjya dAdAzrI sAtheno che. eka divasa dAdAzrI nIrubahenane kahe che ke, 'tame eka ziSya rAkhI lone !" nIrubahene cokhkhI nA pADI. temaNe kahyuM, 'akrama mArgamAM guru-ziSya pada che ja kyAM ? dAdAzrI jAte ja AkhA jagatanA jIvamAtranA ziSya thaIne beThA che ne !" dAdAzrIe pAchuM kahyuM, "are, eka ziSya rAkhavAmAM tamane zo vAMdho Ave ?" tyAre nIrubahene kahyuM, 'ApanI sevAmAM, caraNomAM ja mane rahevA done ! A ziSyane huM kyAM vIMDhALuM ?" tyAre dAdAzrIe pharI kahyuM, 'mArI vAta to samajo. ema karone A nIrubahenane ja tamArA ziSya banAvI done !!!" ahoho ! "sahajAtma svarUpa paramaguru pahelIvAra paramArtha samajAyo. tyArathI amAro nIru joDe guruziSya jevo judo vyavahAra cAlu thaI gayo ! zuddhAtmA pote parama guru ane nIru enA ziSya ! [1.3] judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItato prayoga caMdubhAI joDe judApaNuM vartAya, te mATe caMdubhAI joDe vAtacItano prayoga khUba ja sacoTa pUravAra thayo che. parama pUjya dAdAzrI pote paNa 18 aMbAlAlabhAI joDe vAto karatA, e nIrubene joyelA ne sAMbhaLelA ! arIsAmAM joIne jAte khabho thAbaDIne hasIne vAto karatA, 'tabiyata sArI chene ? DhIlA nA paDazo ? ame anaMta zaktivALA chIe. badhI zakti maLaze. kyAreka Thapakoya ApatA aMbAlAlabhAIne ! kyAreka majAkeya karatA ! jAta joDenA vAtacItanA prayogathI Akho divasa judA to rahetA ja paNa khUba ja phreza rahetA, ATaluM badhuM kAma karavA chatAMya, eMsI varaseya majAka karatAM kahetAM, "are, tamane to kazuM aDatuM ja nathIne ? tame to moTA bhagavAna lAgo chone ?" tyAre aMbAlAlabhAI kahe, "nA, bhagavAna to tame cho, huM nahIM !' Ama majhA karatA jAta joDe vAto karatAM karatAM ! dAdAzrI kahetA ke jJAna thayA pachI ja vAtacIta judA rahIne thavA mAMDI ! TrenamAM dAdAzrI tharDa klAsamAM ja musApharI karatA. te paga du:khe to bAtharUmamAM arIsA sAme jaIne thAbaDI letA ne dilAso jAtane jAte ja ApatA. tyAre AkhA brahmAMDanA rAjA jevuM lAge ! dAdAzrI buddhi joDe vAto karatAM khAsa kahetAM, 'have tuM tAre piyara jatI rahe, kAla bapora pachI Avaje. ahIM tAruM kAma ja nathI.' have buddhi avaLuM batADe to tene kahe, 'vagara phIe vakIlAta zA mATe karavA maMDI paDI ?! tane koNe vakIlAta karavAnuM kaheluM ?" navo dhaMdho hoya tyAM sTImaranA kAnamAM phUMka mArIne kahe, 'tAre jyAre DUbavuM hoya tyAre DUbaje. amArI evI icchA nathI !' TrenamAM begane ne maMdiramAM joDAne acUka kahI detA ke, 'tamAre javuM hoya to jajo ne rahevuM hoya to rahejo. paNa ame to amArA dhyAnamAM ja rahevAnA !' ApaNe ApaNI jAtane nAnapaNathI ja jANIe ke nahIM ? jAta joDenA vAtacItanA prayogathI prakRtithI AtmA lapaTo paDI jAya che. prakRtine Tekala karavA enI joDe vAto karavI. so TakA judApaNAnI jAgRti kyAre thaI kahevAya ? caMdubhAInuM mana-buddhicitta-ahaMkAra dareke dareka zuM kare che te joyA karavuM. caMdubhAInA dehane arIsA sAme rAkhI judA jovA ne vAto karavI. AnAthI so TakA juduM vartAze ! game tevo mAMdo hoya paNa vAgha sAmo Ave tyAre e doDe ke nahIM ? mahIM zakti to che ja ne ! koI gALa de tyAre caMdubhAIne kahevuM, 'tamAro kaMI doSa haze tyAre kahe 19

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chene ?" ane kone kahe che ? jene kahe che te to pote cho ja nahIM. 'huM to zuddhAtmA chuM', zuddhAtmApada nA cUke to tapa thayuM kahevAya, nahIM to tapa cUkyA ! koI pArako caMdune Thapako ApI jAya, tenA karatAM ApaNe jAte ja caMdune Thapako nA ApIe ? koI mAre, gALo de ne samatA rahe to jANavuM ke mAnakaSAya baMdha thaI gayo. have lobhakaSAyane tapAsavo. koIne uchInA pacAsa hajAra ApyA ne pachI e avaLuM bole to ? tyAM huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ne gALo de che teya zuddhAtmA che ema rahevuM joIe. uparathI caMdubhAIne kahevuM ke Ama zA mATe karo cho ? jarA pAMsarA rahone ! A thayuM temAM bhogave enI bhUla ! moTI rakama levAnI hoya ne te pAchI nA Ape toya ApaNuM moTuM bagaDavuM nA joIe to sAruM. devuM moTuM hoya toya manamAM nizcaya rAkhavo ke cUkavavA ja che, to te apAze. jenA hoya, ene maLyA vagara nA rahe ! mokSe javuM hoya to mAna ne lobha bilakula nA hovA joIe. jyAM pratikramaNane ya caMdu nA gAMThe, to tene ekAMtamAM besADI ThapakAravA. caMdubhAIne jarA saphokezana jevuM thAya to tene kahevAnuM, "ame chIene ! have ApaNe ekanA be thayA ! pahelAM koI tamAro AdhAra na hato. have ame chIene !' have pADozInuM badhI rIte dhyAna rAkhavAnuM. caMdubhAI darzana kare, vrata-japa kare to tene karavA do ane nA kare toya vAMdho nahIM. 'caMdubhAI, je Ave teno samabhAve nikAla karo." caMdubhAI joDe vAtacItano vyavahAra kAyama mATe karI nAkhavo. game tevA AcAra haze paNa akrama vijJAnathI teno mokSa che. AcArane ne mokSane levAdevA nathI ! jJAnathI badhuM khapI jAya ! ahaMkAra jabarajasta rIte bhagna thaI jAya tyAM zuM karavuM ? 'anaMta zaktivALo chuM' e bolyA karo ane aMdarakhAne tapa karavAnuM ! pachI bahAranAM badhAM ja vAdaLAM vIkharAI jAya. tamAma AgrahothI mukta rahevAnuM che. puruSa ane prakRti bhedajJAnathI chUTAM paDyA pachI kharo puruSArtha zarU thayo ! ane have puruSArthamAM ja rahevuM che ema nakkI rAkhavuM. [14] tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? jJAna maLyA pachIya ghaNIvAra tanmayAkAra thaI javAya che evI phariyAda mahAtmAone vAraMvAra thatI hoya che, dAdAzrI pAse. teno phoDa pADatAM pUjyazrI kahe che ke, 'tanmayAkAra tuM nathI thato, caMdubhAI thAya che. je tanmayAkAra thAya, tene zI rIte khabara paDe ke huM tanmayAkAra thayo ?! mATe jANanAro enAthI judo ja che ! tanmayAkAra kayo bhAga thAya che ? pudgalamAM amuka baLa hoya che temAM mukhya buddhi, to kyAreka ahaMkAra tanmayAkAra thAya. paNa zuddhAtmA kyAreya tanmayAkAra nA thAya.. tanmayAkAra zAthI thavAya che ? jAgRti ochI thAya che ? nA. evuM nathI. paNa A to karmano phorsa ghaNo badho hoya che tethI jAgRti khasI gaI evuM bhAse che ! tanmayAkAra thaI jAva toya have jJAna maLyA pachI navuM karma cArja thatuM nathI ! kapaDAM barAbara nA dhovAyAM to pharI dhoI nAkhavAM ! sahelo ne saTa rasto che ne ! koI kriyAmAM ekAkAra thayA pachI pAchuM zuddhAtmAnA lakSamAM lAve che koNa ? lAvavAnI jarUra ja kyAM hoya ? te ghaDIe AtmA to prakAzarUpe hato ja. A to vRttio tanmayAkAra thAya che ne vRttio ja svayaM kSaNamAM nijaghara bhaNI pAchI vaLI jAya che ! te pAchuM lakSa AvI gayuM ema lAge ! eTale tanmayAkAra thavAya che eya bhramaNA ja che ! rAga-dveSa karyA tyAM ja have vItarAga thavAnuM che. ghaNIvAra ema lAge ke judI judI DIgrImAM tanmayAkAra thavAya che. are, tharmomiTarane koI dahADo tAva caDhe ? DaoNkTarane caDhe paNa kaMI tharmomiTarane tAva caDhe ? AtmA pote tharmomiTara jevo che ! badhuM dekhADe chatAM nirlepa ja rahe. game teTalI mApaNI kare paNa phUTapaTTI kaMI lAMbI-TUMkI thAya ? jagyA lAMbITUMkI mapAya. paNa phUTapaTTI to vItarAga ja chene ! A to khAlI bhrAMti ja thAya che ke phUTapaTTI lAMbI thaI ne TUMkI thaI ! be tattvo koI dahADo ekAkAra thaI jAya ? AtmA draSTA ne caMdubhAI drazya. te drazya ne draSTA kyAreya ekAkAra thaI ja nA zake ! tanmayAkAra thavAya che e bhAyamAna pariNAmo che ema jANavuM. vaLI bhAsyamAna pariNAma te mAruM nathI. ATaluM rahe to jAgRti rahe.

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udayakarmamAM tanmayAkAra thaI jAya che te ahaMkAra che. e ahaMkArane ja udayakarmamAM mIThAza ke kaDavAza lAge che ne temAM bhaLI jAya che ! udayakarmane joyuM to chUTA ne nA joyuM to mauna rahyA kahevAya ne enAthI coMTe ja ! pahelAM 'huM pratiSThita AtmArUpe hato, te have jAgRtirUpe thaI jAya che. jJAna maLyA pachI zuddhAtmA saMpUrNa thavAtuM nathI. te pratiSThita AtmAmAM je haju huM'nI bilipha rahelI che te tanmayAkAra thAya che. pratiSThita AtmAthI pote to chUTI gayo, paNa bilipha kyAMka kyAMka rahI gayelI, te tanmayAkAra karAve. ane je jAgRti thaI gaI che te tanmayAkAra thavA detI nathI. jJAna maLyA pachI pratiSThita AtmA zeyarUpe, DiscArjarUpe ja rahe che, je jJAna pahelAM e jJAtArUpe hato. have jAgRti jJAtArUpe thAya che. ane mULa AtmA to haju kyAMya cheTe rahyo ! saMpUrNa jAgRta thAya eTale mULa AtmAmAM ekAkAra thaI jAya ! pachI koI Dakho ja nA rahe ! tyAM sudhI aMtarAtmadazA rahe. bahirmukhIdazA chUTI, aMtarAtmadazA prApta thaI ne aMtarAtmadazA pUrI thaye paramAtmapadanI pUrNa prApti thaI jAya !!! tanmayAkAra nathI thayo tenAM lakSaNo zuM ? koInI joDe vAtacIta karatA hoya, te ghaDIe sahejeya moMDhA para asara nA thAya. caMdubhAIne judA jotA jotA vAta kare, jANe koI tIsarI ja vyaktinI vAta karatA hoya ema, to e AtmA judo kahevAya. vyavahAranA kAryamAM AtmAne hAjara rAkhavAnI jarUra nathI. vyavahAranAM kAryo to sAyanTiphika sarakamasTenziyala eviDansa pUrAM karI de che ! emAM deha, mana, aMtaHkaraNa, puNya-pApa badhAM AvI jAya. saMsAranA kAryomAM AtmA parovAto ja nathI. ahaMkAra ane buddhithI ja kAryo thaI jAya che ! kharekhara buddhi ane jo ahaMkAra parovAya che ne ema bhAse che ke AtmA parovAI gayo. tyAM kevuM rahevuM joIe ? tyAM AtmAne to mAtra jANapaNAmAM ja rahevAnuM che ke A buddhi parovAI ne A sAruM thayuM ke khoTuM thayuM. eTale AtmA mAtra jANakAra ja rahe che ane bhaLI jAya che te buddhi ane ahaMkAra. akrama mArgamAM mULa AtmAnI jAgRti ane A pratiSThita AtmA ne aMtaHkaraNanA judApaNAnA phoDa saMpUrNa paDe che tethI saMsAramAM rahIne saMpUrNa mukti anubhavAya che. jyAre kramikamAM to badhAM parigraho choDatAM choDatAM draSTi khulatI jAya che ! [1.5] sITanuM silekzana sva-paratuM ! vyavahAramAM caMdubhAI Dakho karI nAkhe te zAthI ? zuddhAtmAnI sITane badale caMdubhAInI sITa para besI jAya che. caMdunI sITa para zaoNka lAge che toya UThe nahIM jaldI ! te caMdubhAIne bhogavavuM paDe. tamAre joyA karavAnuM ! caMdubhAI kacakaca kare te jovAnuM ne temanI badhI ja kriyAone joyA karavAnI ! badhI sITo para besatAM jAya, anubhava letAM jAya ne cokaDI mAratA jAya. aMte zuddhAtmAnI ja sITa sarvazreSTha che e saMpUrNa anubhavamAM Ave tyAre pachI sITa na badale ! ema ne ema nA cAle. badhuM ja anubhava siddha thavuM ja joIe. 'mArAthI sahana thatuM nathI' thayuM ke pArakI sITa para besI gayA ! pArakI sITamAM mIThAza lAge, te sITa para ja besI rahe. strIo to khAsa ! dAdAzrI nija anubhava kahe che, 'jJAna thatAM pahelAM mane eka kSaNa paNa saMsAramAM sukha lAgyuM nathI. badhuM kaDavuM ja lAge ! potApaNuM eka sekanDeya sahana nahatuM thatuM. te jJAna thatAMnI sAthe ja badhuM UDI gayuM ! A sITa badalAI teya enI meLe ja ! mane kaMI ja khabara nahatI pahelAM !' parama pUjaya dAdAzrInI bhUmikA kevI jabarajasta haze ?! eka jaNa kahe, "dAdA, tamArI vAta sAMbhaLI. ghaNuM sAruM lAgyuM.' tyAre dAdAzrIe kahyuM, 'have AnA para khyAla rAkhajo. sAMbhaLanAro judo, khyAla rAkhanAro, nahIM rAkhanAro judo ne tame pAchA judAM !" A badhuM kahenAro eno e ja ! caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'ame joIe ane tame dAdAnA kahyA pramANe khyAla rAkhajo !" ane evo satata khyAla rAkhe, te mahAtmA para dAdAzrI kevA rAjI rAjI thaI jatAM haze ?! [16] pote potAne Thapako prAkRtika aTakaNanI sAme mahAtmAo abaLApaNuM anubhave che. khUba khUba puruSArtha, pratikramaNa, draDha nizcaya-nirNaya vi.vi. karyA chatAMya prakRti, phAIla naM. 1 gulAMTa khavaDAvI ja de che ne calaNa enuM ja cAlI jAya che ! mahIM khabara paDe chatAMya kyAre, kaI ghaDIe pAchale bAraNethI aTakaNa ghUsI jAya ne tenuM calaNa calAvI de ne bhaTakaNa notare ! tyAM AgaLa jJAnanAM tamAma 23

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hathiyAro buThThAM thaI jAya che. enA mATe pUjya dAdAzrIe anokho prayoga mahAtmAo mATe mUkyo che je jabarajasta asarakAraka nIvaDe che. ekAMtamAM agAzImAM ekalA besIne potAnI phAIla naM. 1, eTale ke potAnI jAtane khUba moTe moTethI TaiDakAvavI. phAIla naM. 1 ekjhakTa judI ja dekhAya, raDe teya dekhAya, ApaNe je ThapakArIe chIe te badhuMya juduM dekhAya. khUba vaDhIe ke 'nAlAyaka, badamAza, AnA mATe meM dUdha pAyuM ! sApa banAvavA ?' Ama caMdune vaDhAya to virodhapakSavALA badhA judA paDI jAya ane ApaNe AtmapakSamAM majabUta thayA ! AmAM koNa kone Thapako Ape che ? prajJAsamiti, ajJAsamitine Thapako Ape che ane A badhAne jANe che e zuddhAtmA ! Avo Thapako apAya tyAre phAIla naM. 1ne zarUAtamAM bahu Diprezana Ave. pachI dhIme dhIme e jatuM rahe ne aMdara jabarajasta AnaMda anubhavAya ! eTale pratyakSa jJAnInI AjJA laIne ja A ThapakA sAmAyikano prayoga karAya. ema ne ema nA karAya. nahIM to UMdhI asareya thaI jAya. bahu Dipreza thaI jAya to arIsAmAM khabho ThokIne AzvAsana ApavuM. 'ame chIene tamArI joDe !' vaLI bahAra Diprezana ne aMdarakhAne khuza thavuM ke have ThekANe AvyA. Ama dAdAzrIno saMpUrNa sAyanTiphika eproca che, A kALane anurUpa kheMca eka roga che. enAthI chUTavA caMdulAlathI chUTA paDI javuM. kheMca kare che caMdulAla ne ApaNe jJAtA. eTale kheMca kharekharI kharI paDI enI meLe ! dAdAzrI potAnA lagnanA mohanuM varNana karatAM kahe che ke mane lagnanuM mAhyaruM hau dekhAya. mAthethI pAghaDI khasI ne moha khaselo dekhAyo. 'pachI rAMDavAno vicAra Avelo tamane' ema potAnI jAta joDe vAto hau thAya ! ApaNe ApaNI jAtane orgenAijha karavAnI e ApaNuM kAma. kyAreka ThapakAravuM, Diprezana Ave tyAre pAchuM navI rIte thAbaDavuM - ema aMdara jotA rahevuM ne goThavaNI karatAM rahevuM ! [17] Diprezana sAme judApaNAtI jAgRti apamAna maLe, bhayaMkara nukasAna thAya tyAre Diprezana AvI jAya. tyAre jAtane saMbhALavI paDe. caMdubhAIne jarA eliveTa karI ApavA paDe, 'tame to puNyazALI, jJAnI tamane kyAMthI maLe ? mokSano sikko laIne beThA, have zenI ciMtA ?" to AkhuM belensa rahe, judApaNAnI jAgRti sAthe ! DiprezanamAM samatA rahe to AtmA jaDe ne Diprezanano upAya kare to saMsAramAM khape. Diprezana eTale eka prakAranuM tapa kahevAya. emAM AtmA jaDe. cogaradama upasarga-pariSaha hoya tyAre AtmA pragaTa thAya ! eTale Diprezana to AvakAravA jevuM che. enA upAya nA karAya. eTamabomba paDe toya AtmAmAMthI na khasAya, Diprezana nA Ave evuM A akrama vijJAna che ! siMhanA saMtAnane ziyALa te zuM karI zake ?! je thaze te jaDane thaze, zuddhAtmAne thoDuM kaMI thAya ? ApaNe to zuddhAtmA ja chIe ! DiprezananuM mULa kAraNa zuM ? nabaLAI, dAnata cora, nikhAlasa ne cokhkhI dAnatavALAne Diprezana kyAMthI Ave ? sadA vartamAnamAM rahe, tene Diprezana nA Ave. Diprezana vakhate AtmA jJAtA rahe tema elivezana vakhateya jJAtA tarIke ja rahevAnuM che. jyAM sudhI eliveTa thAya che, tyAM sudhI Diprezana AvyA vagara nahIM rahe ! caMdubhAIne koI dabaDAve to ApaNe mahI khuza thavuM ne caMdubhAI joDe vAto karavI, 'bahu ropha mAratA hatA, te AvyuM A phaLa ! karo have pratikramaNa !' Diprezana nA thAya e jagyA "ApaNI' ! jagatanuM jyAM kalyANa thAya e jagyA 'ApaNI' ! Ama varte te sapATAbaMdha pragati kare ! [2.1] jJAtA-draSTA jJAtA-draSTA ane paramAnaMda e AtmAno mukhya svabhAva. jJAtA-draSTA pada nathI tyAM bhrAMti che. niraMtara jJAtA-draSTA padamAM koNa rahI zake ? zAnI. jJAtA-draSTA padamAM rahevA mATe mahAtmAone pUrvakarma naDe che. enI joDe zeya-jJAtA saMbaMdha rAkhIne chUTI javAnuM che ! have je kaMI Ave e badhuM ja zeya svarUpa che. rAga-dveSa ghaTe che ke nahIM eTaluM ja mahIM tapAsyA karavAnuM. AtmA jJAtA svabhAvano che, vItarAga che ane zeya vastu paNa vItarAga ja che. paNa vacce ahaMkAra rAga-dveSa karAve che. jJAna maLyA pachI ahaMkAra jAya che. pachI zeya sAthe vItarAga rahevAnuM. rAgeya nahIM ne tarachoDeya nahIM. evuM kaMI doSa thAya to pratikramaNa karI levAnuM. jJAna maLyA pachI jJAtA-draSTApaNuM na cUke, tene "phorena'nI koI jokhamadArI rahetI nathI. chatAM mahAtmAone UMDo vasavaso raheto hoya che ke jJAtA-draSTA 24

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pada avirata rahetuM nathI. Ave ne jAya, Ave ne jAya evuM thayA kare. teno khulAso karatAM dAdAzrI kahe che, "e jatuM to rahevAnuM. avirata evuM rahe te to bhagavAna ja thaI gayA !? haju saMsAranA karmo bAkI che te pUrA karavAnAMne ? jema karmo ochAM thatAM jaze tema lakSa vadhAre ne vadhAre rahetuM jaze ! ane karmoya jJAtA-draSTA padamAM rahevAthI chUTI jAya. buddhi ane jJAnanuM kriyApaNuM kaI rIte pakaDAya ? udayakarmamAM DakhoDakhala kare te ghaDIe budghi hoya ane udayakarmamAM khoDakhala nA kare te ghaDIe jJAna hoya. Dakho mAtra buddhino che. buddhie ja badhA locA mAryA che. ajJAnanI asaro mahAtmAone thAya ne jJAnamAM nA rahevA de, tyAM zuM thAya ? pUjyazrI jaNAve che ke caMdubhAIthI, ajJAnanI asarothI 'tame' judA raho to chUTyA. pachI kaMI aDe ja nahIM. A asarovALuM kyAre sudhare ne dahADo vaLe ?! bannenA dharma bhinna ja che. hAtha ghAlyo ke dAjhayA ! pratikramaNa thaI jAya toya chUTAya. buddhi copaDA rAkhe ne bhagavAna copaDA rAkhatA ja nathI ! letI-detI udayakarma karAve che. mahAtmAone samyak jJAna to che, paNa kevaLajJAna nathI. tethI DakhoDakhala hajI thaI jAya che ! eTale mahAtmAone mahIM Dakho karavAno vicAra Avyo, tenuM pratikramaNa karI le eTale Dakhala nA thAya. Dakhala thatAM pahelAM ja vALI dIdhuM. ekjhekTa jJAtA-draSTA nA rahevAya tyAM pratikramaNa karI levuM sAruM ! koInI joDe vAto karatI vakhate tenA eTa e TAIma jJAtA-draSTA nA rahevAya eTalI jAgRti ochI. te pachI khyAla Ave toya bahu thaI gayuM ! eTa e TAIma jJAtA-draSTA nA rahevAyuM, te karma pharI Ave tyAre pAchuM tenA jJAtA draSTA rahIne niveDo lAvavAno raheze. pachI e vAto hoya, khAvAno prasaMga hoya ke game te hoya, mahAtmAo puruSArtha kare to A bhavamAMya phAIlono nikAla thaI jAya. bAkI rahe te bIjA janmamAMya Ave. banne bAbatonI chUTa che. manamAM vicAra Ave, tenA jJAtA-draSTA nA rahevAya to tyAMthI dhyAna bIje DAyavarTa karavuM, kaMI vidhio ke maMtro bolIne karavuM. paNa jJAtA-draSTA jevo phAyado enAthI nA thAya, ocho thAya. jJAtA-draSTA e TopamosTa riyala puruSArtha che. TUMkAmAM phAIlane joIne kADhIe to te pharI nahIM Ave, jovAnI rahI gaI te pAchI Avaze. 26 A phAIlone jovAnI rahI kema jAya che ? Dabala Dekara baso vacce Ave to sAmI sAIDanuM rastA parathI dekhAya ? ane baso jatI rahe eTale ? vacce baso AvI gaI ne nA dekhAyuM, tethI kaMI jonAro ke jovAnI vastuo UDI gaI ? nA. AtmA to arIsA jevo che. enI sAme je kaMI Ave te tenA jJAnamAM jhaLake. pachI rastAnI sAme bAjunI zaNagArelI dukAneya Ave to te jue ne vacce Dabala Dekara baso Ave teneya jue ! A basone baMdha kaI rIte karAya ? nA karAya. pahelAMno hisAba che e ! ene joIne cokhkhA karI nAkho. A badho nikAla thaI jAya pachI dAdAzrI jevI dazA Ave ! eka mahAtmA pUjyazrIne pUche che ke mAre udaya vakhate jovA-jANavAmAM khUba saMgharSa cAle che. pUjyazrI khulAso kare che ke, jene saMgharSa cAle che, je tanmayAkAra thaI jAya che te koNa ? caMdubhAI nAmanuM pudgala. tame to zuddhAtmA ja cho, A philamane joyA karo. philamamAM Akho vakhata lagnanAM ja sIna Ave to game ? emAM to mArAmArInA, karuNatAnA, haraNa ka2vAnAM jAtajAtanAM sIna joIe, to ja AnaMda Ave. zuddhAtmAe have caMdubhAInI philama jovAnI che. pachI jarAya AnaMda nA jAya. philama kaMI evuM kahe che ke mane joDe mAthe laIne jAva ?! e to joIne jAva' kahe che. kaMI guMdara lagADI coMTADIne laI jAva evuM thoDuM e kahe che ? vaLI philama nA gamatI AvI, tethI kaMI tene adhavacce kaTa karAya jonArAthI ? e to pUrI karavI paDe. jonArAne zuM vAMdho ? philama ane philama jonArAne koI dahADo thAka na lAge ! samabhAve nikAla thayo ke nA thayo e pudgala dharma ane e jeNe jANyuM te Atmadharma. beu judAM ja che ! pArakI pIDAmAM kyAM paDAya ? mahIM sArA bhAva thAya, kharAba bhAva thAya, teneya 'joyA' karavuM. kharAba bhAva nIkaLe to jarA caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'ohoho ! tamane to huM lAyaka jANato hato, paNa nIkaLyA nAlAyaka.' eTale caMdunA bhAvane, vartanane ne vANIne ApaNe 'joyA' karavuM. te ja samaye juo to uttama, nahIM to thoDIvAra pachIye joIne juduM pADI levuM. caMdubhAI bolatA hoya tyAre te joyA karo e chelluM jJAna. tamAma jJAnIo A ja karatA hatA. kRSNa, rAma, mahAvIra A ja karatA hatA ! 27

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[22] 'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! mokSamArga zuM che ? saMsAra sAyanTiphika sarakamasTenziyala eviDansa svarUpe che eTale saMyogo badhuM karyA kare ne AtmA badhuM jANyA kare. 'ApaNe' jANyA karavAnuM. saMjogonA dhakkAthI AtmAnI svabhAva dazAmAMthI vibhAva dazA Ave che tyAM pote naimittika kartA bane che, kharekhara kartA nathI. caMdubhAI judA dekhAya - saMpUrNa judA dekhAya e chelluM jJAna. bhagavAna mahAvIra potAnA eka pudgalane ja jotAM hatA. ApaNeya e ja karavAnuM che. A to jUnI Adato che, te jAgRtithI dhIme dhIme chUTI jaze. parama pUjya dAdAzrI kahe che ke kasAIne jo AtmajJAna maLe ne e jJAnamAM rahe ane badhuM joyA ja kare, Dakho nA kare ne AjJAmAM rahe to e mokSe jAya ! kasAInI kriyA naDatI nathI, 'huM karuM chuM' e naDe che. eka avatAra mAtra 'joyA' ja karo badhuM, to mokSe javAya evuM che. kucAritrane jANe, enuM nAma cAritra. sArA cAritranI mastI e kucAritra karatAM bhayaMkara jokhamI che. AnaMda to svarUpamAMthI ja levAya. e sivAyanuM bAkI badhuM mastI che. phAIla naM. 1nI UThyA tyAMthI sUtA sudhInI badhI ja kriyAone 'joyA' karavAnI ! zubhAzubhano kartA 'huM chuM' mAne che tyAM sudhI ja doSa lAge. kartA nathI, tene bhoktApadeya nathI, pachI saMvara rahe. mamatA khAlI karavA zuM karavuM ? ene 'joyA' karavI. caMdulAlanA kriminala ke sivila gunAo, je hoya tene have 'joyA' karavAnuM. kANa ane vAjAM beune 'joyA' karavAnAM. beu jJeya che, sarakhA che ! jovA-jANavAthI karmanI pUrNa nirjarA thAya. koI vyakti joDe bhAMjagaDa thaI hoya, tenuM pratikramaNa karI levuM. DakhoDakhala thaI jAya, tene ya jovuM ne jANavuM. be jaNa jhaghaDatA hoya tyAM zuM karavuM ? zuM bane che te jovuM. caMdubhAI vacce paDe ke nA paDe - beu jovuM. bhUlane jue to e jAya, nahIM to e nA jAya. A vijJAna sUkSmamAM sUkSma 28 doSa dekhADe. pratikramaNa hau karAve. mananI, buddhinI, aMtaHkaraNanI philama joyA ja karo. jJeya nA hoya to jJAtA zuM jue ? philama juo paNa rAga-dveSa nA karo. [2.3] pudgalane zuddha karo ApaNA makAnane raMga-rogAna karyuM paNa makAnanA khUNA-khAMcA cokhkhA karavAnA ke nahIM ? dAdAzrIe zuddhAtmA pada ApyuM. have pudgalano badho kacaro sApha karI nAkho pharnicaranI nIcethI, khUNe-khAMcarethI kacaro sApha karavo paDene ? ubAhavALA vAsaNamAM kema karIne jamAya ? badhuM cokhkhuM karatAM karatAM chevaTe bhagavAna thavAnuM che ! ahIM bhakta ke dAsa nathI thavAnuM. AtmAmAM nA rahevA de e badho kacaro. upayoga cUkAve te badho kacaro. caMdubhAI pAse kacaro sApha karAvavAno. ene kahIe, A aMtaHkaraNane cokhkhuM karo. pratikramaNa karo, caraNavidhi karo. ene navaro nahIM besavA devAno. upayogamAM rahe to saheje kacaro khalAsa thaI jAya. kacarAne "mAruM svarUpa nathI' kahyuM to cokhkhuM thaI jaze. [3] zuddha upayoga upayoga eTale jAgRtine ekamAM ja phokasa karI rAkhavuM te ! dA.ta. corane Akho dahADo corImAM ja upayoga hoya ! mAtAjInA meLAmAM gayA hoya to Akho dahADo upayoga zemAM rahe ? bhaktimAM, zubha upayogamAM rahe ! AtmAno vyavahAramAM upayoga kahevAya. tenA cAra prakAra che : (1) azuddha upayoga (2) azubha upayoga (3) zubha upayoga (4) zudgha upayoga. pahelAM traNa ahaMkAre karIne che ane cotho zuddha upayoga ahaMkAra rahita che. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM bhAna thAya, samyak darzana thAya tyAra pachI ja zuddha upayoga kahevAya. emAM kaSAya-viSaya saMbaMdhI vicAra paNa na hoya. vrata, japa-tapa, bhakti, zAstrapaThana e badhuM zubha upayoga kahevAya. eka bAju kriyA ne bIjI bAjuM 'jovAnuM' - banne sAthe ja joIe. AtmA hAjara hoya to kriyA thaIne pUrI thAya. dareka vyavahAra joIne javo joIe to e zuddha thaIne kharI paDe ! upayoga rAkhyA vagarano vyavahA2 pharI pharI Avaze, tene tyAre upayoga rAkhIne kliyara karavo paDaze. 29

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upayoga eTale ramaNatA zemAM vartAya che te ! phAIlono nikAla karatI vakhate upayoga bahAra rAkhavo paDene ? e AjJA pALI, tethI te zuddha upayoga kahevAya. sAmAnAM zuddhAtmA dekhAya tyAre zuddha upayoga hoya. zuddha upayoga konA thakI rahe ? prajJA thakI. ajJA pekIMga dekhADe ne prajJA mAla dekhADe. gALo bhAMDanArane ya zuddhAtmA tarIke ja jue, te kharo zuddha upayoga. zuddhAtmAno zuddha upayoga hoya ane caMdubhAIne azuddha ke zubhAzubha upayoga hoya. upayoga ane jAgRtimAM zuM phera ? lAITa saLagyA karatI hoya ne ApaNe UMghI jaIe to tene upayoga thayo nA kahevAya. nakAmuM jAya. ane lAITamAM vAMcIe, ene upayoga karyo kahevAya. vahI jatI jAgRtine kAmamAM laIe te upayoga. ilekTrisiTI to che ja paNa baTana dAbIe to ajavALuM thAya, paMkho thAya. e upayoga karyo kahevAya. zuddha upayoga eTale potAnI jAtane zuddha jANe. enI pratIti, lakSa ne anubhava rahe ane bIjAmAM paNa te rUpe jue, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. game teTaluM kharAba kAma thaI jAya toya 'huM zuddha ja chuM' evuM rahevuM joIe e zuddha upayoga. kharAba kAma caMdu kare che, zuddhAtmA nahIM. koInI phariyAda karo tyAM zuddha upayoga UDI jAya ! ene gunegAra joyo, zuddhAtmA nA joyo. ene kartA joyo. kartA jue eTale azuddha upayoga thaI gayo. 'huM karuM chuM, te kare che, teo kare che" e bhAva saMpUrNapaNe nathI, tyAM zuddha upayoga hoya ja. koIe saheja lAla vAvaTo dharyo, tyAM 'A Ama kema kare che ?" evuM thayuM ke kAcA paDI gayA. e vyakti lAla vAvaTo dharatI ja nathI, vyavasthita dhare che ! zuddha upayogIne koI kartA ja nA dekhAya. eTale ene jagata AkhuM nirdoSa ja dekhAya. A to ApaNAmAM doSa Ubho thAya ke tarata bIjAno doSa dekhAya. TUMkamAM, potAnI jAtane zuddha jovI te zuddha upayoga. bIjAne zuddha jovuM, nirdoSa jovA teya zuddha upayoga. mahAtmAne eTa e TAIma be cAlatuM hoya ghaNIvAra, ke bAhya draSTithI doSa dekhAya ne aMtara draSTithI nirdoSa dekhAya. bhalabhalA sAdhuAcAryoneya AvuM nA rahe. nirdoSa dekhADe che e ja jJAna che. zuddha upayoganI goThavaNI kevI rIte karavI ? caMdulAla zuM karI rahyA che, ene Akho dahADo joyA karavuM, jANyA karavuM eTale potAnI prakRtine nihALavI, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. khAtI vakhate, UMghatI vakhate, kAma karatI vakhate, vAto karatI vakhate caMdulAlane jovA, Ama zuddha upayoganI goThavaNI karI devI. caMdulAla philama ne pote jonAro ! mana-vacana-kAyA zubhAzubhamAM hoya ne AtmA zuddha upayogamAM ! vicArone jue to te zuddha upayoga ne nA jovAya to zuddha upayoga cUkyA paNa tethI kaMI navuM karma baMdhAtuM nathI. ApaNI sAmAyikamAM mAtra aMtaHkaraNane ja joyA karavAnuM hoya che. tethI temAM zuddha upayoga rahe. vakhate koI doSita dekhAya to tenuM pratikramaNa karI lIdhuM hoya toya cAle. apamAnanI sAme tema ja mAnanI sAme paNa zuddha upayoga rAkhavo ghaTe. mAna kone Ape che ? pADozIne, pudgalane ! to tyAM zuddha upayoga rahe. pAMca AjJAmAM rahe te paNa eka prakArano zuddha upayoga. badhAmAM zuddhAtmA jovAya, A phAIlo che ema rahe. pAMca AjJA zuddha upayogamAM rahevAnI vADa che. upayoga rAkhyA sivAya jJAna vadhe ja nahIM. bAbo dUdha DhoLato hoya te 'joyA' karavuM, tene vAravo kharo, paNa kaSAya nahIM karavAnA, Imozanala nahIM thavAnuM. dAdA pAse besIne zaktio mAMge e zuddha upayoganA najIkanuM kahevAya. zuddha upayoganuM sAdhana kahevAya. homa ne phorena DipArTamenTane judA rAkhe e paNa zuddha upayoga kahevAya paNa e zarUAtano zuddha upayoga che, sthULa zuddha upayoga che. sUkSmamAM zuddha upayoganI mahAtmAne khabara nA paDe. samajAve toya nA khabara paDe. sthULa sudhI Ave toya ghaNuM che. sthaLamAMthI sUkSmamAM abhyAsathI javAya. jAgRti mahIM rahyA kare ke A khoTuM thayuM, khoTuM thayuM. paNa te pachI ema ne ema jAgRti vahI jAya. jAgRtino upayoga karavAno che. lIsI jagyAe kevI jAgRti rahe ? kUvA para gayelA mANasane vAIpha ke chokarAM yAda Ave ? e vakhate upayoga kahevAya. upayoga cUkavAnI jagyA kaI kaI ? bahArathI jyAM mIThAza Ave tyAM upayoga cUkAya. khUba baphAro hoya ne ekadama pavana Ave tyAM upayoga cakAya. vAtomAM rasa paDI gayo te upayoga cUkyA. khAvAmAM TesTa lAgyo ke upayoga 31

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cUkyA. ruci thaI ke upayoga cUkyA. AtmAmAM ruci sadA rahevI joIe. jJAnano gADha anubhava thAya pachI upayoga saheje rahe. pachI puruSArtha karavAno pUro thaI jAya ! dAdAmAM citta rahe teya zuddha upayoga kahevAya. dAdAnI sevAmAM citta rahe to ya zuddha upayoga thAya. paNa A badho sthULa zuddha upayoga kahevAya. paisA gaNatI vakhate kevo suMdara upayoga rahe ? bairI ke chokarAM sAme Ave toya tene gaNakAre nahIM ! upayoga ekkekTa rahyo, e kevI rIte khabara paDe ? citta AghuMpAchuM nA thAya e jovAnuM. parama pUjya dAdAzrIne zuddha upayoga kevo rahe che, evuM pUchatAM tenuM varNana karatAM kahe che ke kaMI vAMcatA hoIe ne temAM caMcaLanI ane zAMtAnI vAta AvatI hoya to amane emanA zuddhAtmAnI upara ja draSTi hoya, jAgRti hoya. zuddha upayoga cUkAya nahIM. are, trIjI vyaktinI vAta thatI hoya toya e zuddhAtmA ja che, e upayoga cUkAya nahIM ! vyavahAranA kArya nA hoya tyAre sahelAIthI upayoga rahe, judApaNuM rahe. paNa mana-vANInA kArya vakhate agharuM che. vANI vakhate 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ene anulakSIne vANI nIkaLe tyAre upayoga rahe. vyavahArane anulakSIne vANI nIkaLe to upayoga nA rahe. upayogamAM nA rahe tyAre jAgRti kahevAya. bIjuM kAma nA thAya. upayoga eTale bIjuM kAma. AtmAnA ja guNonuM bole tyAre upayoga rahe, jema "huM anaMta jJAnavALo chuM, huM anaMta darzanavALo chuM..." ane bIjuM bole to zuddha upayoga nA rahe. bahu tyAre jAgRti rahe. jAgRti rahe eTale pajhala-kaSAya kazuM UbhuM nA thAya. 'vANI para che ne parAdhIna che, rekarDa vAge che" evuM badhuM hAjara rahe. dAdAzrI kahe che ke, "ame bolIe, te upayogapUrvakanuM bolIe. A rekarDa bole, tenA para amAro upayoga rahe. rekarDamAM syAdvAda keTaluM sacavAyuM, zuM bhUla thaI e badhuM jhINavaTathI dekhAya. huM bolyo evuM thayuM ke upayoga cUkyA ! koI sevA kare toya ame amArA AtmAmAM rahIe. eka miniTeya upayoganI bahAra nA jaIe. saMpUrNa ahaMkAra jAya tyAre AtmA saMpUrNapaNe jANyo kahevAya. akrama jJAna maLe eTale prathama Atmadarzana lAdhe che. pachI jJAnInA sAnidhyamAM besa besa karavAthI zuddha upayoga thato jAya che. jeTalo zuddha upayoga utpanna thato jAya eTaluM jJAna pariNamatuM jAya. niraMtara zuddha upayoga varyo, enuM nAma kevaLa jJAna ! mahAtmAone sillakI mAla zuddha upayoga cUkAve. paisAnI lAlaca zuddha upayoga cUkAve. zuddha upayogamAM Akho vakhata rahevAnI goThavaNI karavI joIe. bahAra nIkaLIe to rastAmAM, basamAM ke TrenamAM je koI jIva maLe, tenA zuddhAtmA tarata joI levA. parama pUjya dAdAzrI kahe che ke "amArI graMthio badhI ogaLI gayelI, tethI amane koI pakaDI nA zake. tethI niraMtara mukta ja hoya.' mana navaruM paDe ke dAdA vidhio karavAnI cAlu karI de. jarAka paoNjha maLe ke vidhi goThavI de ! eka sekanDanoya paoNjha maLe toya tarata vidhi karavAnI cAlu thaI jAya ! emane jhokuM ja nA hoya, evara elarTa ! navarAzanA TAImamAM mahAtmAo vidhio kare, caraNavidhi kare, nava kalamo vigere kare e jAgRtimAM rahevAnA upAya che. ene zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. vidhio AtmapakSIya nathI ne pudgalapakSIya nathI, nyUTrala che. saMsArane nyUTrala karI de che ! siddhastuti AtmapakSI che. ajJAnIya A nava kalamo, namaskAra vidhi vigere vidhio kare, to teno ya ahaMkAra zuddha thato jAya ane kaSAyo ochAM kare. koIpaNa mA enA nAnA bALakane eka miniTeya vIlo mUke ? evuM AtmAne eka kSaNa paNa vIlo mUkavA jevo nathI. eTale prakRti zuM kare che, ene ApaNe joyA karavAnuM che ! bIjAmAM tanmayAkAra thaI javAya, te AtmAne vIlo mUkyo kahevAya. AiskrIma khAvAmAM vAMdho nathI, paNa be-traNa DIzo vadhAre mAMge te khoTuM. pAchalI ajJAnanI prekTisa naDatara bane che. ene lIdhe vIlo mUkAI jAya che. eka phero vIlo nA mUkAyo to pAchI anekagaNI zaktio pragaTa thAya che ! dAdAzrIne nIrubahena navaDAve tyAre dAdAzrI pote saMpUrNa zuddha upayogamAM rahe ane nIrubahenano upayoga saheje ema ne ema sarasa ja rahe. jIvatA jJAnI puruSanI sevA karo, te zuddha upayoga kahevAya ane mUrtine navaDAvo, sevA

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karo to e zubha upayoga kahevAya. dAdAnI vANI lakhe e zuddha upayoga lAvanArI vastu che, e zuddha upayoganI zarUAta che ! dAdAzrI kahe che ke basanI rAha jovAnI nA hoya. e vakhate upayoga goThavI devAno. badhAMnI aMdara zuddhAtmA jovAnA, tethI samaya bagaDe nahIM. rAha jovAmAM eka miniTa paNa bagADAya nahIM. UMgha eTale AtmAne kothaLAmAM pUrIne bAMdhI devo te. jJAna pachI UMgha kema poSAya ? upayoganuM phaLa zuM ? samAdhi ! jamatI vakhate mahAtmAone lakSa rahe, upayoga nA rahe. upayoga bahu UMcI vastu che. e dAdAzrIne rahe. jamatI vakhate upayoga eTale zuM ? koNa khAya che ? kevI rIte khAya che ? svAda zAmAM vadhAre le che ? jamatI vakhate vAto kare, tyAre temAM tanmayAkAra thaI javAya. pachI upayoga to zuM paNa jAgRti ya nA rahe. tethI dAdA jamatI vakhate kyAreya vAto karatA nahIM. mahAtmAne jAgRti rahe. dAdA bolelA te dhAraNa ko'kane ja thAya. jAgRti mULa jagyAe bhegI thavI muzkela che. tethI lakSa rahe, upayoga nahIM. anubhava thayA vinA upayoga kema karIne thAya ? 'A huM chuM' enuM pramANa enA anaMta pradezo sahita saheje badalAvuM nA joIe ! parama pUjya dAdAzrI kahe che ke dAdAnI vANInI bhakti karI, tethI A ajavALuM thayuM. mazInarIo sAthe kAma karavAthI jAgRti nA rahe, ulaTuM AvaraNa Ave. kAraNa ke bhakti konI thAya ? mazInonI ! jenI bhakti karIe, te rUpa thAya. tethI dAdA kahetA ke huM nAnapaNamAMya sAyakalanuM paMcara jAte rIpera nahato karato. dAdAzrI kahe che ke amArI sAthe sevAmAM koNa rahI zake ? niraMtara upayogavALo hoya e ja rahI zake. upayoga vagarano zI rIte rahI zake ? nahIM to dAdAnI hAjarImAM ThaMDaka varte eTale upayoga jato rahe. upayoga upara upayoga eTale ebsolyuTa pada kahevAya ! upayoga eTale jAgRti kaI bAju vAparI te. AtmadraSTi thayA pachI zuddha upayoga rahe, nahIM to ahaMkArano ja upayoga hoya. 34 [4] anubhava-lakSa-pratIti AtmajJAna prApti pachI jJAnInA paricayamAM vadhAremAM vadhAre rahe, tene AtmAnuM lakSa niraMtara rahe. kyAreka kAmamAM tanmayAkAra thaI jAya tyAre ema lAge ke jJAna badhuM jatuM rahyuM, paNa tema banatuM nathI. tyAre AtmAnuM lakSa khasI jAya che, paNa pratItino tAra to niraMtara joInTa hoya ja che. eTale tarata ja, svayaM enI meLe 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e lakSa pAchuM AvI jAya che. Ane kSAyaka samakita kahyuM ane lakSa pAchuM ja nA Ave to tene upazama samakita kahyuM ! eTale akrama jJAna maLyA pachI anubhava, lakSa ane pratIti - A traNa pagathiyAmAM ja ramyA kare, cothAmAM jAya ja nahIM, enuM nAma kSAyaka samakita. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM'nI niraMtaranI pratIti thaI gaI eTale mokSanA vijhA maLI gayA pachI TikiTa maLI jAya tyAre Ukela Ave. niraMtara pratIti e siddha bhagavAnanI 18 dazA utpanna thaI kahevAya ! jema jema jJAne karIne jANatA javAya, tema tema pratIti draDha thatI jAya. pachI e ukhaDe ja nahIM, to kAma thaI gayuM ! dabANa Ave to vAMkuM vaLe paNa tUTe nahIM, enuM nAma AtmAnI sajjaDa pratIti beThI kahevAya. zraddhA ane pratItimAM zuM phera ? zraddhA UDIya jAya paNa pratIti kyAreya nA UDe. AtmA pratItimAM ekavAra AvI gayo pachI e kyAreya nA jAya. ene kSAyaka samakita kahyuM. mokSano sikko vAgI gayo eno ! pratIti pachI gADha thatI thatI avagADha pratIti thAya. tIrthaMkarone AtmAnI avagADha pratIti hoya ! AtmAnI pratIti pratyakSa jJAnavidhi vinA thatI nathI, pustako ke zAstro vAMcIne nA thAya. AtmAnI pratIti beThA pachI kSamA, namratA, saraLatA, saMtoSa vagere lakSaNo sahejAsaheja utpanna thAya. pratIti mAtra AtmAne ja lAgu thAya che. koIpaNa kArya karo eTale emAM tanmayAkAra thavuM paDe, to e kArya thAya. paNa je tanmayAkAra thaI rahyuM che, tene ApaNe jovuM ne jANavuM ! varte nija svabhAvanuM, anubhava, lakSa, pratIta, vRtti vahe nijabhAvamAM, paramArthe samakita.' - zrImad rAjacaMdra 35

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ajJAna dazAmAM vRttio bahAra bhaTakatI hatI, te nija svabhAvano anubhavalakSa-pratIti varyA pachI tarata ja pAchI enI meLe aMdara vaLI jAya che. Ane paramArtha samakita eTale chelluM, kSAyaka samakita kahyuM. jeno anubhava mahAtmAone varte che. are, dAdAnuM moTuM yAda AvI jAya toya vRttio pAchI vaLI gaI kahevAya. vRttio bahAra zA mATe bhaTake che ? sukha khoLavo. paheluM pratItimAM Ave, pachI e dhIme dhIme anubhavamAM AvatuM jAya eTale pachI vartanamAM enI meLe Ave. akrama mArge jJAnavidhi pAmyA pachI keTalAMka karmo bhasmIbhUta thaI jAya che. tenAthI AtmAno anubhava ane lakSa rahyA kare che. upAdAna vizeSa jAgRta hoya to niraMtara AtmAnuM lakSa rahyA kare. akramamAM 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e khyAlamAM rahe ane kramikamAM lakSa rahyA kare, e bemAM zuM phera ? lakSa eTale amuka jagyAe khIle bAMdheluM hoya ane khyAla eTale enI Thera (game tyAM) hoya ! kramikamAM kSayopazama samakita hoya ne akramamAM kSAyaka samati hoya. mATe AtmA niraMtara khyAlamAM ja rahe. eTale keTalAMkane vAto karatAMya 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e khyAlamAM rahe. ene zukladhyAna kahyuM. "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' UMghamAMthI jAgo to enI meLe hAjara thaI jAya, e niraMtaranI pratIti beThelAnuM phaLa che. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e raTaNa nathI. raTaNa to zabda svarUpa kahevAya. samakitIne saheje lakSamAM hoya. smaraNanuM vismaraNa thAya. akramanA mahAtmAone zuddhAtmAnuM raTaNa karavAnuM nathI. ahIM to paramAtmA thAya che paNa te pratItie karIne ! raTaNa to maMtronuM hoya. A to svarUpa che, maMtra nathI. mAtra rAtre sUtI vakhate ja "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ema bolatAM bolatAM sUI javAnuM. pachI kaMI bolavAnI jarUra nathI. AtmAnuM lakSa sahajabhAve rahe te sAcuM. AtmAnuM raTaNa karavA jAya to sahajabhAve AvatuM baMdha thaI jAya. jagatanA jJAnanuM lakSa bese, paNa AtmAnuM lakSa kyAreya bese evuM nathI. tethI sto ene alakha niraMjana kahyo ! jJAnI puruSa enuM lakSa besADI Ape. paga bhAMgI gayo hoya te ekavAra ja paNa enuM kevuM lakSa rahyA kare ! UbhA thatAM pahelAM lAkaDI enI meLe ja yAda AvI jAyane ! bhartuhari rAjAnuM nATaka bhajavatAM rAjAne aMdarakhAne satata khyAla ja hoya ke huM kharekhara rAjA nathI paNa lakSmIcaMda chuM. tema A aMdara jANatA ja hoya ke "huM zuddhAtmA chuM'. akramamAM saMpUrNa anubhava ane saMpUrNa jJAna niraMtara nathI rahetuM paNa saMpUrNa pratIti niraMtara rahe che. aMtarAtmA pada maLyuM che. hajI phAIlono nikAla karavAno bAkI che. phAIlo pUrI thaye paramAtmA pada. AtmAnubhavanI kakSAnA lakSaNo zuM ? saMsAranI koI bAbata ApaNane asara ja nA kare tyAM pUrNAhUti. tyAM sudhI Amatema thayA kare. AnuM tharmomITara to AtmA pote ja che. mAra mAre, lUMTI le toya rAga-dveSa nA thAya e enuM tharmomiTara. vakhate koI suMvALo hoya to teno deha raDe ane kaThaNa hoya to hase, e jovAnuM nathI paNa enA rAga-dveSa gayA ke nahIM e jovAnuM che ! pachI dhIme dhIme moMDhA pareya asara nA rahe, jJAna pUrepUruM pAkuM thaI jAya eTale ! moDhuM bagaDI jAya che tyAM sudhI hajI kacAza che, ema samajI levAnuM. anubhava jJAna kyAre pragaTa thAya ? pAchalAM bIjAM kaDavAM-mIThAM phaLa Ave temAM samatA rahe, vItarAgatA rahe, tema tema anubhava pragaTa thAya. pachI vartanamAM Ave tyAre saMpUrNa zuddhAtmA pada prApta thAya. AtmAnubhava thAya tyAra pachI mahIM cetavanAro jAgRta thaI jAya che. te kSaNe kSaNe potAnI bhUlo dekhADe, pratikramaNo karAvaDAve. jJAna pahelAM mahIMthI koI cetave nahIM. uparathI Akho dahADo bIjAnAM ja doSo jo jo kare ! A caitanya vijJAna che, te niraMtara mahIM cetave. je vRttio avaLe raste caDhelI, tene prajJAzakti (je jJAna maLyA pachI ja pragaTa thAya che) cetave. ane sAmo risponsa maLe che. cetanAro cetI jAya che ! risponsa Ape che tyArathI cetanAro thayo ane risponsa eTale prajJA kahe ke koIne duHkha apAya te khoTuM che. te mahIM badhI vRttio buddhi-mana-citta-ahaMkAra badhA ja svIkAre ke barobara che, ne e pramANe pheraphAra thaI jAya e risponsa maLyo kahevAya. AmAM mULa AtmAne kaMI ja karavAnuM hotuM nathI. A to badhuM prajJA ja karI le che, je mULa AtmAnI DirekTa zakti che. kAma pUruM thAya ke prajJA pAchI mULa AtmAmAM tanmayAkAra thaI jAya ! cetanAruM koNa ? mahIM je judI paDI che te vRttio. vRttio e pudgala nathI paNa bilipha svarUpe che. e biliphathI pudgala UbhuM thAya che. 36

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saMpUrNa jJAtA-draSTA rahe to tyAM cetanAro ja nA rahyo ne ! have navuM kazuM karavAnuM nathI. mULa AtmAnI je pratIti besI gaI che, tene ja pUrNa karavAnI che. vacce buddhibenane pesavA devAnA nathI. AtmAnI pratIti beThI, tene ja AtmA joyo kahevAya. ane AtmAnuM lakSa beThuM, ene jANyo kahevAya. e kaMI A carmacakSuthI dekhAya tevo nathI ! apamAnano saMjoga Avyo tenI jarAya asara nA thaI, to te darzanarUpI jJAna anubhavamAM AvyuM kahevAya. ane asaro thAya che, moTuM bagaDI jAya che eTalI kacAza che. anubhavadazA mATe hajI TekAjJAnanI jarUriyAta che. jJAnakaLA ne bodhakaLA e TekAjJAna ! bhogave enI bhUla, banyuM e ja nyAya vi. vi. TekAjJAna kahevAya. prasaMge prasaMge judA judA TekAjJAnanI jarUra paDe ne anubhava vadhato jAya. AtmAno anubhava karanAro koNa ? sUkSmatama ahaMkAra. e ahaMkAra pachI vilaya thaI jAya che ane prajJA gAdI para AvI jAya che. AtmAne jonAra ne anubhavanAra beu ekanA eka ja che ! thiyareTiksa e anubhava nA kahevAya, e to samaja kahevAya. ane prekTikala e anubhava kahevAya. samajapUrNa ane anubhavapUrNa enuM nAma jyoti, e ja jJAna, e ja paramAtmA ! jJAnInA paricayamAM rahevAthI emanI pratye zraddhA vadhe. emanA sAnidhyamAM nA rahevAya to emanAM pustakonuM ja vAMcana, emanuM nididhyAsana paNa khUba madada kare ! [5] cAritramoha darzanamoha kone kahevAya ? pote kharekhara caMdubhAI nathI, kharekhara AtmA che. chatAM 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' evuM mithyA manAvaDAve che, enuM nAma darzanamoha. dehane ja "huM chuM' mAne. AtmAne 'huM chuM' evuM mAne tyAre darzanamoha tUTe. darzanamoha chUTyA pachI je rahyo te cAritramoha. darzanamohathI je karma bAMdhyA, te have phaLarUpe rahyAM te cAritramoha. darzanamoha jAya paNa cAritramoha to rahe. kSAyaka samati kyAre thAya ? darzanamoha jAya tyAre. emAM zuM thAya ? zAstro kahe che, cAra anaMtAnubaMdhI kaSAya ane traNa mohanIya - mithyAtva, mizra ne samyakatva mohanIya jAya ema sAta prakRti khape tyAre. akrama mArgamAM mahAtmAone kSAyaka samakita lAdhe che, jene kramikamArgavALA nathI svIkAratA. amadAvAdathI dilhI javA nIkaLyA paNa adhavacce khabara paDI ke A to madrAsanI gADI che. jyAMthI jAgyA tyAMthI pAchA vaLavA mAMDyA. jAgyA eTale darzanamoha tUTyo. pAchA vaLavA mAMDyuM tyAMthI cAritramoha ane dilhI pahoMcIzuM e kevaLajJAna - mokSa. AtmAnA dravya-guNa-paryAyane jANe, teno nizcayathI moha nAza pAme che. chatAM vyavahAramAM je moha rahyo, ene cAritramoha kahyo. nALiyera to che paNa kAcaluM nIkaLe to koparuM kAma lAge. kAcaluM hoya tyAM sudhI zuM kAmanuM ? tema darzanamohanuM kAcaluM jAya to ja kAma thAya. pachI koparuM rahyuM te cAritramoha. darzanamohathI navAM karmo niraMtara cArja thayA kare. ane cAritramoha eTale DiscArja pariNAma. darzanamoha gayA pachI ja bAkI rahelA mohane cAritramoha kahevAya. darzanamohathI laTakelo, te laTakelo kahevAya, cAritramohavALo laTakelo kahevAya nahIM. darzanamoha jAya e to mahAna siddhi maLI kahevAya mokSamArganI ! mahAtmAone jJAna pachI cAritramoha rahyo. cAritramohamAM mahAtmAone dekhatAM ja moha nA thAya. kAraNa ke darzanamoha UDyo che ! have mahAtmAone cAritramohamAM kevuM hoya ? badhuM anicchApUrvakanuM hoya. icchA nA hoya toya moha thayA kare. jema icchA nA hoya toya barapha ogaLyA ja kare ! icchA nA hoya toya krodha-lobha-moha-kapaTa-ahaMkAra thaI jAya. e cAritramoha ugato nahIM paNa Athamato moha che. eno samabhAve nikAla karI nAkhavAno. akrama mArgamAM A badhuM be kalAkamAM ja banI jAya che, je karoDo avatAra nA banI zake te ! cAritramohavALAne kevuM hoya ? koI kapaDAM kADhI le, to tene aMdarakhAne jarAya vAMdho nA Ave. mahAtmAone kaSAya thAya che paNa te pariNAma che, iphekTa che, kaoNjha nathI. paNa bahAranA lokone A nA samajAya. temane thAya, A te kevuM jJAna ? mahAtmAono moha to ughADo dekhAya chene ? paNa e vartanamoha che, DiscArja moha che. je mohana paramANu hatA, te DiscArja thAya che tyAre mahAtmAo ene jJAna karIne zuddha karIne khAlI kare che. eTale e kSINamoha 39

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thAya. mahAtmAonI gADI jItamoha sTezanethI upaDe che te kSINamoha sTezane pahoMcADaze. tyAre mahAtmAo bhagavAna thaI gayA haze ! bAramA guMdANeya cAritramoha hoya. kevaLajJAna thAya tyAre ja cAritramoha khalAsa thaI jAya. have A DiscArja mohano samabhAve nikAla karI nAkhavAno che. mahAtmAono anubhava che ke jJAna lIdhA pachI dhIme dhIme moha kharato jAya che ane AtmAmAM vadhAre sthira thavAya che. mahAtmAono cAritramoha kone kahevAya ? khAya-pIve, nahAya, vaDhe, utAvaLa kare, ALasa kare, kapaDAM sArAM pahere, paTiyA pADe, phreMca kaTa rAkhe, lobha kare, karakasara kare, sinemA jue, lagna kare e badhoya cAritramoha, parama pUjya dAdAzrIno cAritramoha kevo hoya ? braza karavA jAya ne kahe, 'TUthapesTa nathI', to dAdA kahe, "cAlaze'. 'UliyuM nathI', toya kaheze, 'cAlaze'. 'nahAvAmAM TADhuM pANI che', toya 'cAlaze'. jamavAmAM bhAta nathI', toya 'cAlaze'. 'roTalI nathI', toya 'cAlaze'. pIraselI roTalI thALImAMthI uThAvI jAya, toya dAdA kahe, 'cAlaze'. bhAvatuM bhojana thALImAMthI uThAvI jAya, toya dAdA kahe, 'cAlaze' ! saMpUrNa nirAgrahatAvALuM. cAritramoha aTake nahIM, paNa enI para mahAtmAonI jAgRti to hovI ghaTe. jAgRti eTale pataMga cagAve paNa mahIM to satata rahevuM joIe ke A khoTuM thaI rahyuM che. rAjIkhuzIthI nA karAya ! ene jANavuM joIe. jJAnane paNa uDADI de evo apavAdarUpa cAritramoha paNa hoya che. ane te viSayanA prakArano ja hoya, bIjo nahIM. akramanA mahAtmAonA AcAramAM jutA-mRdutAnA badale kaThoratA ghaNIvAra dekhAya. paNa dAdAzrI kahe che ke kharekhara mahAtmAne aMdara RjutAmRdutA hoya ne bahAra kaThoratA hoya. have 'A badho DiscArja moha ja che" kahI, eno durupayoga to nathI thaI jatone ? A kahevuM eya cAritramoha che. jJAnamAM rahevA prayatna karanAro misayujha(durupayoga) nA kare. iTa hepansa e cAritramoha. emAM Dakhala nathI potAnI ke "Ama karo ke nA karo.' A badhA prazno pUche che teya cAritramoha. nirmohI to pUche ja nahIMne ! jAtrA kare, dharama kare, pUjA-pATha, sAmAyika-pratikramaNa kare e badhuM ya cAritramoha. dAna ApyuM teya cAritramoha ne ciDAyo teya cAritramoha. kAraNa ke AmAM AtmA to kazuM karato ja nathIne ! jJAna karIne, tapamAM rahIne cAritramohane zuddha karI nAkhe. dAdAzrI kahe che, "huMya koTa-TopI paheruM chuM. vIMTI paheruM chuM, vALamAM paTiyAM pADuM chuM. dADhIya karuM chuM, to zuM A moha nahIM ?" hA, moha kharo. paNa cAritramoha che. "are, A satsaMga karuM, jJAna ApuM eya moha che.' paNa A cAritramoha che. cAritramoha che tyAM sudhI kevaLajJAna ke mokSa nA thAya. have parama pUjya dAdAzrIne ya cAritramoha ne mahAtmAone ya cAritramoha, to e bemAM phera zuM ? mahAtmAone bojAvALo cAritramoha, saMsAra calAvavavAno ane dAdAzrIne bojA vagarano cAritramoha, bojo ja nahIM saMsArano ! halakAM phUla !! dAdAzrI to tyAM sudhI kahe che ke amArAmAM je karuNAbhAva che teya cAritramoha ja kahevAya. tIrthakaroneya karuNA e cAritramoha ja kahevAya paNa te kevaLajJAna thatAM pahelAM, pachI nahIM. mahAtmAone prazna hoya che ke dAdAnI AjJA pALe te paNa cAritramoha ? nA, e to puruSArtha che prajJAzaktino ! e cAritramoha nathI. cAritramoha AjJA pALavA nA de, saraLane AjJA paLAya. AjJA pALavAthI cAreya ghAtI karma UDI jAya. jJAnathI darzanamoha jAya ane pAMca AjJA pALavAthI cAritramoha jAya. AMkhe pATA bAMdhavAthI cAritramoha Ubho thayo, te UghADI AMkhe joIne khAlI karavAno ! cAritramohanA jJAtA-draSTA rahyA to te ApaNo nathI ne tene pakaDI lIdho to vaLagelo raheze ! 'mane Ama kema thAya che' thayuM to te tamAro. jJAtA-draSTAne Dakho nA hoya, cAritramohamAM Dakho hoya. 'huM nahIM AvuM" e Dakho ! jevo cAritramoha bharelo te nIkaLe. cAritramoha joyA vagarano gayo, te dhoyA vagarano jaze. pharI joIne dhovuM paDaze. jema nahAtI vakhate badhAM kapaDAM dhoIne nIkaLe pachI chelluM kapaDuM nahAyA pachI sAcavIne chAMTA nA UMDe evI rIte dhoI nAkhe. evI rIte have

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A chello moha, cAritramoha dhoI nAkhavAno che ! akramanA mahAtmAo mATe udayakarma nA hoya, cAritramoha hoya. mahAtmAne A nikAlI moha sAtheno udayakarma che, mATe e cAritramoha kahevAya ne ajJAna dazAmAM mULa moha sAthe udayakarma che, mATe tene udayakarma ja kahevAya. game tevA prakArano cAritramoha Ave, niMdya ke pUjya, chatAMya 'huM kaMI ja karato nathI' evo niraMtara khyAla rahevo te kevaLa darzana che. Avo khyAla niraMtara rahe, tene pratikramaNa-pratyAkhyAna kazuM ja karavAnuM rahetuM nathI. mahAtmAne rAgavALo ke dveSavALo, jevo mAla nIkaLe teno nikAla karavAno. agavaDa-sagavaDa badhAMno nikAla karavAno. viSamabhAvathI vaLagyo ne samabhAvathI choDavAno. cAritramohano have tiraskAra karAya nahIM. mahAtmAo tanmayAkAra hoya tyAre ja cAritramoha kahevAya. tanmayAkAra nA rahe to tene cAritramoha nathI. caMdubhAIne judA joyA karo to tame chaTA. tyAM cAritramoha nathI. caMdubhAIne judA nA joyA to tyAM cAritramoha rahyo. ene game tyAre choDavo ja paDaze. ekjhaTa jovuM paDe. caMdune ekjhakTa jovuM eTale zarIra badhuM ekjhakTa juduM dekhAya, caMdu vAto kare te ya badhuM juduM dekhAya. hAtha UMco karyo, nIco karyo teya joyA karAya. A dhIme dhIme anubhavamAM Ave. pahelAM pratIti bese pachI thoDo thoDo anubhava thAya pachI vartanamAM Ave. jema chokarAMne kahevAmAM Ave ke tArA mATe chokarI pasaMda karI che. tenuM nAma cAMdanI che. bahu rUpALI che. have chokarAe chokarI joI nA hoya, khAlI nAma sAMbhaLe tyAMthI AnaMdaprema UbharAya. khAlI sAMbhaLavAthI ja, joyuM nA hoya toya. ema khAlI jJAnI pAse sAMbhaLavAthI jJAna pragaTa thatuM jAya ! A AkhuM akrama vijJAna che. saiddhAMtika vastu che ane saMpUrNa, svayaM kriyAkArI che ! [6.1] karmabaMdhata, tavuM - jUtuM ! nija svarUpanuM bhAna thayuM, puruSa thayA, puruSArtha dharma jAgyo. kartAbhAva mItyo ne jJAtA-draSTAbhAva jAgyo tyAM karma baMdhAtA aTakyA. chatAM mahAtmAone prazna thAya ke jJAna prApta thatAM pahelAMnA kharAM-khoTAM karmonuM nivAraNa kaI rIte ? tenuM samAdhAna pUjayazrI ApatAM kahe che ke jJAnavidhi vakhate jJAnAgnithI pApo bhasmIbhUta thaI jAya che, mahIM beThelA bhagavAnanI kRpAthI. tethI sto AtmA rAta-dahADo hAjara rahe chene ? ciMtA-Tenzana kAyamanAM jAya che ! karmo traNa prakAre similI ApI samajAvyAM che. barapha rUpe, pANI rUpe ne varALa rUpe ! jJAna pachI pANI ne varALa svarUpanA karmo UDI jAya che, paNa barapha rUpe je jAmI gayelA che te bhogavye ja chUTako. ene nikAcita karmo kahyA. paNa ene bhogavavAnI rItamAM Akhoya phera paDI jAya che ! pachI karmo AtmAnaMdamAM rahIne chUTe che ! A karmo bhogave che koNa ? AtmA ? AtmA to paramAtmA ja che, sadAkALa paramAnaMdI che, ene kaI rIte bhogavavAnuM hoya ? ahaMkAra du:kha bhogave che. AtmAnI mAtra tyAM hAjarI hoya che. ghaNAMne thAya ke A barapha jevAM karmone kaI rIte khapAvavA ? alyA, baraphane ogALavA kaMI karavuM paDe ? e to enI meLe ogaLyA ja kare ! tuM AtmAmAM rahIne joyA ja karane ene ! bahu bhAra lAge to pratikramaNapazcAtApa karIe to haLavAza rahe. te karmo pUrAM thaI jAya ! [6.2] AcAra sudhAravA ! akramanA mahAtmAone jJAna pariNAma enA AvaraNanA hisAbe, enA mohanA pramANe judI judI rIte thAya. koIne be kalAkamAM, to koIne be varSeya thAya paNa thAya kharuM. svarUpa jJAnanuM vyavahAramAM pragaTIkaraNa keTaluM thavuM ghaTe ? vyavahAramAM AvatAM vAra lAge. dAdAzrI vyavahAra badho karIne AvelA ane ApaNe karavAno bAkI che. eka jaNe dAdAzrIne pUchayuM ke tame jJAnI cho ne A mahAtmA ya jJAnI che paNa bemAM taratamatA zuM ? tyAre pUjyazrIe kahyuM, 'jJAnamAM phera nathI, vyavahAramAM phera !' have AcAra, vicAra ne uccAramAM phera lAvI nA zakAya. je samaja maLI che, tene UMDuM UMDuM samaja samaja karavAthI jJAnamAM phITa thaI jaze. pachI enI meLe AcaraNamAM Avaze. eTale dAdAzrI kyAreya koIne vaDhatA na hatA. akramamAM AcAra jovAya nahIM. mahIM dharakhama pheraphAra thaI jAya che ! mokSane mATe AcAranI velyu nathI. jevo paNa AcAra hoya, teno nikAla karIne ja mokSe javAze. saMsAramAM sukha joItA hoya to sArAM AcAra joIze. 3

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ghaNIvAra akrama mArganA A siddhAMtane ekAMte pakaDI sva-bacAva karI durupayoga thaI jAya che. tyAM pUjyazrI eTalA ja phorsathI lAlabattI dhare che ke AmAM bacAvamAM nA paDAya. jema kUvAmAM nathI ja paDavuM, emAM kevo draDha nizcaya hoya che ?! tema chatAM paDI javAya to kUvAnA bacAvamAM javAya ? kUvAnA bacAvamAM jAva to pharI pharI paDI ja javAya. vAMkA AcArano vAMdho nathI, paNa eno artha mahAtmAe evuM pakaDI levuM ema nathI. mahAtmAe to evuM rAkhavuM ja joIe ke A na ja thavuM joIe. pachI ene leTa go karAya. durupayoga kare, tene leTa go nA karAya. 'vyavasthita' kone kahevAya ? UghADI AMkhe, sAvadhAnIpUrvaka gADI hAMka. pachI athaDAI to te 'vyavasthita' ! pahelethI nahIM. eTale A khoTAM AcArano vAMdho nahIM evuM nA bolAya. e to bephAma thaI jAya. AmAM navuM jokhama UbhuM thAya. A bannenuM ekjhekTa belensa rAkhavAnuM che. jJAnInI koI paNa vAtane noMdhArI UpADIne upayoga kare to te jokhama che. 'have mane kazuM aDe nahIM' evuM mAnavuM ke bolavuM e moTuM jokhama che. eTale dAdAzrIe sUtra ApyuM, 'viSayo e viSa nathI, paNa viSayomAM nIDaratA e viSa che. mATe viSayothI Daro !' TheTha sudhI DaratA rahevAnuM, bephAma nathI rahevAnuM. ahIM DaratA raho eTale cetatA rahevA mATe kahyuM che. [6.3] pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartata ? ajJAna dazAmAM vartananI bhUla kADhatA hatA. have jJAnadazAmAM vartananI bhUla nA kaDhAya. ene 'joyA' karAya. vartananI bhUla kADhe to cAritramoha nA jAya ne nA kADhe ne joyA kare tene, to te jaze ! vartanane to 'joyA' karavAnuM. dA.ta. abrahmacarya e guno che e niraMtara zraddhAmAM che pachI anubhavamAM paNa AvyuM, paNa vartanamAM nA paNa hoya. pahelI bilipha phare, pachI jJAna pharatAM ghaNo kALa jAya ne pachI ghaNAM kALe vartana phare. vartanamAM nA Ave tyAM sudhI zraddhA beThI hoya toya buddhi kAma karyA kare, potAne khabareya paDe ke A Dakho kare che. samajaNamAMthI vartanamAM Ave tyAM sudhI navuM karma cArja thAya ? evo prazna udbhavatAM pUjyazrI samAdhAna Ape che ke nA, cArja nA thAya. paNa DiscArja pUruM nA thAya. TAIma nakAmo jAya. hA, pratikramaNathI pAtaLuM paDI jAya. aMte to anubhavamAM AvavuM joIe. anubhavamAM kyAre Ave ke saMsAranAM eka aNu-paramANuMmAM paNa sukha lAgavuM nA joIe. A to UMghamAMthI sukha le, khAvAmAMthI, viSayamAMthI sukha le tyAM sudhI anubhava nA thAya. 44 jyAM kaSAyo jAya tyAM to bahu UMcuM samajamAM AvI gayuM gaNAya. mahAtmAne aMdara jeTaluM khIle eTalI bahAra suvAsa Ave paNa e dhIme dhIme Ave. eka jaNane phariyAda hatI dAdAzrI pAse ke mahAtmAomAM DisIplIna nathI dekhAtI. bahAra kharAba dekhAya che ApaNuM. navA loko prabhAvita thavAne badale puTa opha thaI (AvatAM aTakI) jAya che. dAdAzrI kahe che ke mahAtmAonI DisIplIna joIne prabhAvita thaze, eno koI artha ja nathI. e enI buddhine Taca thaze, hRdayane nahIM. eTale ahIM DisIplIna nA hoya paNa prema hoya, rAga-dveSa rahita hoya ! pAMca hajAra mANaso jamatA hoya paNa kyAMya khakhaDATa nA hoya ! ahIM DisIplIna eTale banAvaTa nA hoya. ane DisIplIna rAkhavA jAya to AtmAne kartA tarIke pAcho mUkavo paDe eTale tyAM jJAnanuM pariNAma UDI jAya ! eTale ahIM to naoN laoN - laoN. badhAM ja mukta AnaMda mANatA hoya. lokakalyANanI bhAvanAthI navA loko AkarSAze, lokakalyANanI kriyAthI nahIM ! ahIM zuddha vyavahAra hoya, zubha nahIM. AtmAne AnuSaMgika vyavahAra ahIM hoya. e jovAnI draSTi hovI joIe. mahIM 'joyA' ja karavAthI badhuM zuddha thatuM ja jAya, enI meLe. A 'khoTuM che' evo mahIM bhAva pesI gayo ke enI meLe ja e badhuM cokhkhuM thatuM jAya ne 'emAM zuM khoTuM che' kahyuM ke pAMca lAkha varaseya e doSo nA jAya ! [7] riyala puruSArtha be jAtanA puruSArtha - eka bhrAMtino puruSArtha ne bIjo puruSa thayA pachIno riyala puruSArtha. e bemAM phera zuM ? riyala puruSArthamAM karavAnI vastu nathI, mAtra AtmasvabhAvamAM rahIne 'jovAnuM' ne 'jANavAnuM' ja hoya che. ane rileTiva puruSArthamAM mAtra bhAva karavAnA ke aisA hama kareMge' ke 'aisA nahIM kareMge !' ene bhrAMtino bhAva puruSArtha kahyo. emAMya koI kriyA nathI. puruSArtha e AMtarika vastu che. bhrAMtimAM kartApaNAnA bhAvathI ja puruSArtha thAya che. jJAnadazAmAM jJAtA-draSTA bhAvathI ja puruSArtha thAya che. puruSa thayA pachI jJAtA-draSTA rahe athavA to dAdAnI pAMca AjJAmAM rahe, to te sAco puruSArtha thayo kahevAya. bIjuM kazuM ja karavAnuM nathI emAM. AjJAo badhI 45

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puruSa mATe che, prakRti mATe nathI. AjJAmAM rahevuM e puruSArtha ane ethI AgaLano puruSArtha eTale sahaja svabhAvamAM vagara AjJAe rahI zake che. A pariNAma AjJA pALavAthI ja Ave. eTale prathama AjJArUpI puruSArtha ne emAMthI aMte svAbhAvika puruSArtha pragame jJAna-ajJAnane judA pADe e riyala puruSArtha. Ane ja bhedavijJAna kahyuM. ane o puruSArtha prajJA karAvaDAve che. AjJAmAM rahevAno nizcaya eya puruSArtha che, eya prajJA karAvaDAve che. nizcaya karyo te pramANe AgaLa pragati maMDAya. pachI dhIme dhIme puruSArthamAMthI parAkrama maMDAya. parAkrama eTale zuM ? jema kUtaruM kAdavathI AkhA zarIre ragadoLAI gayuM hoya, te pachI potAnI jAtane hacamacAvIne evuM khaMkhere ke badho ja kAdava nIkaLI jAya ne ekadama cokhkhacaTTa thaI jAya ! jANe hamaNe ja nahAIne AvyuM na hoya ?! A emane kayA prophesare zIkhavADyuM haze ?! potAnA doSo niSpakSapAtapaNe jue e puruSArtha. dAdAnI kRpA kyAM varase ? sAcA dilathI jeNe puruSArtha mAMDyo hoya tyAM ! dAdAzrInA aMtima divasomAM mahAtmAone saMketa rUpe jabarajasta saMdezo ApatA gayelA ke atyAra sudhI ame mahAtmAone bilADI baccAne saMbhALe tema saMbhALyA. have tame amane vAMdarInA baccAnI jema coMTI paDajo ! [8] zukladhyAta akrama jJAna maLyA pachI mahIM zenuM dhyAna rahe che ? 'caMdubhAI chuM e ke "zuddhAtmA chuM' e ? lagabhaga badhAMne Akho vakhata "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e ja rahyA kare che. bhUlavA jAya toya nA bhUlAya e ! ene zukladhyAna kahyuM. zukladhyAna e pratyakSa mokSanuM kAraNa che ne dharmadhyAna e parokSa mokSanuM kAraNa che. kharekhara zuddhAtmAnuM dhyAna karavAnuM nathI hotuM. dhyeya ane dhyAtAnuM anusaMdhAna dhyAnathI thAya. kramika mArgamAM zuddhAtmA pada prApta karavA sAdhake dhyeya nakkI karavAno ke mAre zuddhAtmA prApta karavo che. tame cho caMdubhAI eTale caMdubhAI dhyAtA ne zuddhAtmA e dhyeya. e beno sAMdho maLe, eka tAra 46 thAya, tyAre dhyAna kahevAya. e dhyAnathI zuddhAtmA thaI jAya ! ane A akrama mArgamAM to pote dhyeya svarUpa ja thaI gayAne ! pachI dhyAna karavAnuM rahyuM ja kyAM ?! kramika mArgamAM to A kALamAM zukladhyAna thAya ja nahIM ema manAya che, akramamAM je zakya banI gayuM che ! potAnA svarUpanA khyAlamAM ja rahevuM hoya to 'caMdubhAI" tamane dekhAyA kare. enA manane jue, vANIne jue e AtmA. e jue e ja AtmadhyAna. muMbaI javAnuM nakkI karyuM hoya eTale haratAM-pharatAMya e dhyAnamAM ja hoyane ke muMbaI javAnuM che ! enuM nAma dhyAna. AMkho baMdha karIne besI rahe e dhyAna nahIM paNa ekAgratA kahevAya ! mahAtmAo pratikramaNa kare tyAre vyavahArathI dharmadhyAna ane nizcayathI zukladhyAna varta. akramamAM aMdara-bahAra beu juduM hoya ane akramamAM ArtadhyAna-raudradhyAna nizcayathI thatAM ja nathI. kapALadeve kahyuM chene ke jJAnI puruSa e ja mAro AtmA che. te dAdAnuM dhyAna kare te AtmadhyAna ja che, zukladhyAna ja che. akrama jJAnathI ekAvatArI pada sudhI jaI zakAya che. A kALamAM A kSetrathI sIdho mokSa zakya nathI paNa vAyA mahAvideha kSetrethI zakya che. ane pAMca AjJA pALavAthI UMcAmAM UMcuM dharmadhyAna thAya che. jenAthI puNyAnubaMdhI puNya eTalA pUratuM ja baMdhAya che, je mahAvideha kSetre pahoMcavA upakArI bane che. amasto jJAnIne aDI gayo hoya to ya janma-maraNanI hada Ave che ane jJAna laI gayo, thoDIghaNI AjJAmAM rahyo toya teno paMdarame bhave to moDAmAM moDo mokSa thAya ja ! zukladhyAnanA cAra pAyA. pahelA pAyAmAM aspaSTa vedana. je akramanA mahAtmAone rahe. bIjA pAyAmAM parama pUjya dAdAzrI svayaM jemAM rahetA, je spaSTa vedanano che ane trIjA pAyAmAM kevaLajJAna ne cothA pAyAmAMthI mokSe jAya ! [9] ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! potAne prApta thayelA AtmajJAna aMge, mRtyu vakhate, pachI mahAvideha kSetra, mokSa temaja mahAtmAonI dinacaryA vi vi. aMge pUchAyelA mahAtmAonA 47

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mahAtmAoe mRtyu samaye zuM jAgRtimAM rahevAnuM ? aMta samaye ApaNI aMdara zuM cAlI rahyuM che, tene joyA ja karavAnuM. e nA rahevAya to riyalarileTivanI AjJAmAM ke pAMca AjJAmAM rahevuM ! dAdAzrI pUrNa bAMhedharI Ape che ke aMta samaye dAdA hAjara ja raheze. samAdhi maraNa thaze. mRtyunI vedanAne badale AtmAno AnaMda raheze ! vidha vidha praznonA sacoTa samAdhAna pUjyazrIe ApyA che. je vAMcatA ja mahAtmAone A jJAna maLyA badala alaukika evI dhanyatA anubhavAya ! mahAtmA kone kahevAya ? bAhya saMyama hoya ke nA hoya paNa AMtarika saMyama jabarajasta hoya. kaSAyano aMtara saMyama hoya. jo ke bahAra krodha kare paNa aMdara to 'A nA ja thavuM joIe' evuM rahe. zuddhAtmA dazA prApta karI e mahAtmA. mahAtmAnuM kArya zuM ? bharelo mAla samatApUrvaka khAlI karavo. mahAtmAnI pharaja zuM ? vItarAga rahevuM. rAga-dveSa rahita rahevuM. mahAtmAnuM Adarza jIvana kevuM hoya ? gharanAM, AjubAjuvALAM badhAMya kahe, 'kahevuM paDe'. badhAM ja lIlA vAvaTA dhare ! mahAtmAno nityakrama zuM ? ahIM to no laoN - la. je bane te sAcuM. avaLuM nIkaLe tyAM "A nA hovuM joIe' evuM aMdara hovuM joIe. savAranA vaheluM UThavuM ? jyAre UThAya tyAre. paNa sUryanArAyaNanI AbarU rahe eTalA mATe e AvatAM pahelAM UThI javuM sAruM ! sUI javuM kaI rIte ? dAdAnA citrapaTanuM nididhyAsana karatAM karatAM potAnA ja kAnane saMbhaLAya e rIte dhIme dhIme 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM, huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ema bolatAM bolatAM dararoja sUI javuM. enAthI AkhI rAta mahIM AtmAnI jAgRti rahyA karaze. mokSe javAnI utAvaLa karanArA mahAtmAone pUjyazrI kahe che, 'gADImAM beThA pachI TrenamAM koI utAvaLiyo hoya ane te TrenamAM doDAdoDI kare tenAthI zuM vaLe ? ghaNA mahAtmAne thAya ke mokSa have keTalA avatAra pachI thaze ? dAdAzrI enI geranTI ApatAM kahe che ke "amArI pAMca AjJA sittera TakA pALe to eka avatAramAM ja mokSe jAya ! ane vadhAremAM vadhAre traNa ke cAra avatAra, koI lobhiyo hoya to te pUrA paMdareya kare ane AjJA nA pALe to doDhasoya thAya. ane koI UMdho cAle, virAdhanA kare to UDI ya jAya. ghaNAM pUche che ke A jJAna AvatA bhave raheze ? dAdA kahe che ke A jJAna jatuM nA rahe. A bhavamAM 81 sudhI pahoMcyA to pachI Avate bhava 81thI cAlu thaze. jenAM ArtadhyAna-raudradhyAna baMdha thayA, e pariNAma ja ene tIrthaMkaro pAse besADaze ! dAdAzrI kahe che, pAMca AjJA A bhava pUratI ja che tamAre. pachInA bhavamAM to badhI jJAo tamArI mahIM vaNAI gayelI haze !! ane je je phAIlo joDe rAga-dveSa chUTI gayA, te pAchI bhegI nahIM thAya. nahIM to pAchI bhegI thaze. pAMca AjJA pALavAthI puNyAnubaMdhI puNya baMdhAya che. jenuM phaLa pachIno bhava jabarajasta jAhojalAlImAM janmAve che ! mahAvideha kSetramAM sImaMdhara svAmI pAse janma maLe ne badhI sAnukULatA maLI rahe. mahAtmAone mokSanA vijhA maLI gayA, have TikiTa bAkI che. dAdAzrI kahe che ke kaMI thAya ne moTuM sahejeya bagaDe nahIM, mahIM AtmasthiratA rahe tyAre samajI lejo ke mahAvideha kSetranI TikiTa paNa AvI gaI ! [10] akrama vijJAtanI balihArI ! akrama vijJAna eka ajAyaba vijJAna che. vijJAna eTale avirodhAbhAsa, rokaDuM phaLa ApanAruM, svayaM kriyAkArI. badhethI tALA maLe ja. mahIMthI cetave, potAnI bhUllo dekhADe, jabarajasta AMtarika parivartana apAve. Adhi-vyAdhiupAdhimAM ya niraMtara samAdhi rakhAve. ciMtA-upAdhi-Tenzana jyAM saze nahIM, zaMkA-bhaya-azAMti aDe nahIM evI niraMtara sthitimAM akrama jJAna prApta karanArAone mUkI de ! jenA thakI sarvasvapaNe paTaMtara pAmyA, tene sarvasva samarpaNa karajo. paTaMtara eTale jAtyAMtara.

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akramanA mahAtmAone jJAnavidhi vakhate anaMta avatAranI amAsa kAyamane mATe mAtra be kalAkamAM ja jAya che ane bIjano caMdramA Uge che. bIjamAMthI pUnama sudhIno mArga dAdAnI pAMca AjJAmAM rahIne pUro karavAno che. emAM khAsa to pAMcamI AjJA pramANe dAdAno satsaMga niyamita karavAno temaja jenA thakI akrama vijJAna pAmyA te parama nimittane sajjaDa pakaDIne, temane sarvabhAva samarpIne UbhA thatAM prazno pratyakSamAM temane maLIne ukelI nAkhavAnA. A ja ekameva akramano pUrNAhUtino mArga rahe che pachI. akramamAM kazI sAdhanA karavAnI rahetI nathI. e badhuM kramikamAM hoya che. akramamAM AjJA e dharma ne AjJA e ja tapa. bIjuM kazuM ja nahIM. saMpUrNa jJAnamAM rahe che, tenI zuM nizAnI ? game tevAM parigrahomAM saMpUrNa aparigrahI rahe te ! ane jJAnamAM pUrNa na raheto hoya, tene jeTalo parigraha ocho hoya teTalo pragati mATe phAyadAkAraka che. akramamAM ahaMkAra sajIvana kyAre thAya ? pAMca AjJA pALavAnI choDI do to. pachI kusaMga cogaradamathI pesIne ahaMkAra sajIvana karI deze ! akramamAM paDavAno bhaya kharo ? pragati ochI-vadhatI thayA kare paNa paDAya to nahIM ja. akramamAM lapasavAnA sthAna kyAM ? mAMsAhAra, dArU-gAMjo ane parastrIgamana(aNahakkanAM viSayo). AnAthI je paDaze, tenuM pharI ThekANuM nahIM rahe ! hADakuMya nahIM jaDe. dAdAzrIe potAnI jJAna thayA pahelAMnI pAMca AjJAo ane potAnI kramika mArganI sAdhanAnI suMdara vAto karI che. dAdAzrI kahe che, tame ajJAnImAMthI mahAtmA banyA. jJAna pAmIne have AjJAmAM rahIne, pyora rahIne cokhkhI dAnatavALo eka dahADo mahAtmAmAMthI bhagavAna thaIne Ubho raheze !

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anukramaNikA 1.1 AtmajAgRti jAgRti, zuddhAtmA svarUpanI ! 1 vadhu jAgRti Ama ! karanAro judo jANyo e ja jAgRti ! 2 jAgRtanuM sAnidhya vadhAre jAgRti ! 13 pahelethI chellA sTezananI musApharI ! 3 jAgRti rojiMdA jIvanamAM ! jAgRti dekhADe nijadoSo ! 4 kacaro baLe ne vadhu jAgRti ! 16 jAgRti e nathI iphekTa ! 4 jJAnInuM sAnidhya khIlave jAgRti ! 17 jJAna hajara e ja jAgRti ! 5 hAjara thayuM te ja jJAna ! 17 dAdAnI jAgRtinI jhalaka ! 6 jAgRti janma kaDavAzamAMthI ! apUrNa, chatAM niraMtara jAgRti ! 9 jAgRti ane puNya ! prajJA ane jAgRtinI jugala joDI ! 9 vicAra AvatAM pahelAM ja jAgRti ! 21 Ama mukhya che jAgRti ja ! 10 jhokuM khAdhuM. e khoTa ! na pacyuM A kALe koIne kevaLajJAna ! 11 1.2 judApaNAnI jAgRti Adhi-vyAdhi-upAdhimAMya samAdhi ! 23 game te sthitimAM AtmA, AtmA..32 ApaNe jAtane oLakhIe ke nahIM ? 24 pote paramAtmA ne 'caMdu' pADozI ! 33 DiphekTane jANanAro AtmA ! 25 AghuMpAchuM thAya koNa ? cetanapakSI pudgalane zuM duHkha ? ra6 vaDhe te hoya 'huM ! gharaDo koNa ? 27 dAdAno nija judApaNAno vyavahAra ! sthiti mahAtmAnI pakSAghAtamAM ! 28 gAphela kahevAya kone ? munImane na aDe khoTa-napho ! 29 have nikAlI rAga-dveSa ! jJAnI e ja mAro AtmA ! 29 'caMdu khedamAM ne 'tame' jJAnamAM ! 43 na karAya rakSaNa 'caMdu'nuM ! 30 lokonI draSTimAM, zuddhAtmA thayA.... na karAya vaza indriyone have ! 31 1.judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! samajo prayoga judApaNAno ! 45 pote ADo thAya tyAre ! jAta joDe vAtacItano prayoga ! 46 koI gALa de tyAre... 'huMya paTela sAthe karato vAto ! 48 jAgRti, lobha na mAnanI sAme ! 63 'amArA' anubhavanI vAta ! 48 na koIno dhaNI AtmA ! dareka joDe kare dAdA vAto ! 49 samaya veDaphAya tyAre ! jJAnIno gamo-aNagamo ! 51 bosa vaDhe tyAre... arIsAmAM pUrNa judApaNuM ! para noMdhArA, thayA sAdhAra... jANIe nAnapaNathI jAtane ! para chUTuM rAkhavA, samajI levuM Ama ! 67 ne prakRtithI lapaTo paDe Atama... 53 mokSa ne AcArane nathI levAdevA ! 68 pote potAno thAbaDavo khabho ! 54 ThapakAro caMdune, judo rAkhIne ! 69 udAsIna mana joDe vAto karo ! 55 pratikramaNathI tUTe abhiprAya Ama thAya "prakRtine Tekala ! pa6 pote potAnI joDeya satsaMga ! 71 so TakA judApaNAno anubhava ! 57 satsaMgamAM bhaLI javuM badhAM joDe ! 71 vAgha joIne mAMdo kevo doDe ! 58 koI ahaMkAra bhave, tyAM.... 72 doSo sAme jAgRti.... pa9 akrama vijJAnanI ajAyabI ! 1.4 tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? na thAya AtmA tanmayAkAra kadi ! 80 udayane jovuM te akrama ! tanmayAkAra thavAya te bhramaNA ja ! 83 'huM' varte have jAgRtimAM ! 91 bhAsyamAna pariNAma hoya mArA ! 85 tanmayAkAra nathInI nizAnI ! 92 dAdAe dIdho nirlepa-nirAMka AtmA ! 86 vyavahAra vakhateya pote jANanAra ja ! 92 1.5 sITanuM silekzata, sva-paratuM ! roMga sITamAM beThA tethI.... 97 paramITamAM lAge mIThAza, paNa... 104 aMte birAjo paramAtmAnI ja sITa... 100 jJAna samajAyuM te judo ne pote.... 108 jAgRti, nahIM vyavasthitane AdhIna ! 102 1.6 pote potAne Thapako gharamAM to eka jevuM joIene ? 110 Ama TaiDakAvo jAtane ! 118 ThapakArI jAtane jora jorathI ! 111 jAtane vaDhavAnI khape tAkAta ! 119 nijadoSonI pratIti thaye pragati ! 111 doSa dekhe te noya 'tame ! 122 ThapakA-sAmAyikanuM adbhuta pariNAma ! 115 1.7 Diprezata sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti na Diprezana koIthI have ! 131 ja pADatAM ja Diprezana gAyaba ! 141 Diprezana te "huM nahIM ! - 131 Diprezana Ave tyAre... 142 DiprezanamAM ja jaDe AtmA ! 132 Atmazakti jAge, tyAM Diprezana... 14pa barakata vagarano caMdu, pahelethI ja ! 137 2.1 jJAtA-draSTA jJAtA-drazya tyAM paramAnaMda ! 149 basono TrAphika cakAve 'jovAnuM ! 160 pUrvakarma naDe jJAtA-draSTA rahevAmAM ! 149 na khoLo TrAphika kliyaransane ! 163 jJAtA-draSTAne 'phorena'nuM nahIM jokhama ! 150 AkhI philma lagnanI ja game ? 164 udayakarmamAM DakhoDakhala ! 151 'jovAthI thAya hisAba cokhkhA ! 165 52 - che 51

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jJAtA-draSTA sivAyanuM badho DakhoDakhala !153 jovA-jANavAnuM tatkSaNe ja ! 155 phAIla joyA vagara gaI to ! 155 158 tyAM bAkI rahI jAya nikAla ! jAgRti caDhe, dhyAna DAyavarTa karatAM ! 158 2.2 'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! A ja che mokSamArga ! 171 kharAbane kharAba 'jANye' e jAya ! 172 saMga - asaMga - satsaMga 173 tanmayAkAra thAya tene jovAnuM ! 175 naDe kartApaNuM, nahIM ke kukriyA ! 176 177 AtmajJAna vinA nahIM jJAyaka ! jonAro jiMdagI AkhI ya sarakho ! 178 kucAritranuM jANapaNuM e ja cAritra ! 178 kartA thayo to lAge doSa ! 181 2.3 pudgalane jotA raho aMdaranA kacarAne ! joyA karo jAtanI bhUlo sadA ! kyAM sudhI dekhADyA kare dAdA ? 193 195 196 166 167 na thAke philma ke prekSaka ! nikAla kare e pudgala dharma ! bolanArane 'jANe' te chelluM jJAna ! 168 Ane kahevAya jJAtA-draSTa 168 Ama khAlI thAya mamatA ! 'juo'kriminala ke sivila... joyA karo, puraNanuM galana ! 185 kANa ane vAjAM beu sarakhA jJeya ! 185 53 182 183 jovA-jANavAthI thAya nirjarA pUrNa ! 186 DakhoDakhalane ya 'jANo' ! 187 187 190 191 be jhaghaDe tyAre zuM karavuM ? iphekTa mAtra jJeya ! zuM thAya che tene 'juo' ! zuddha karo ! jeNe bagADyuM teNe karavuM cokhkhuM ! 197 upayoga cUkAve e kacaro ! 199 doSo dekhAya e upayoga ! 200 3. zuddha upayoga 201 235 203 upayoganI samaja ! upayoga e kono guNa ? phera, upayoga ane jAgRtimAM ! yathArtha zuddha upayoga ! 204 205 200 245 mahAtmAono zuddha upayoga ! zuddha upayogamAM rahevAnI goThavaNI ! 236 dAdAnI vidhio ane zuddha upayoga ! 238 vidhi karatAMya jJAtA-draSTApaNuM ! 242 phera zuddha upayoga ane jJAtA-draSTAmAM ! 207 ajJAnIneya helpa kare A vidhio ! 244 zuddha upayoga kone ? vyavahAra ne upayoga, banne sAthe..... 208 na jue kartA koine jagamAMhI ! zuddha upayogIne jagata nirdoSa | goThavaNI zuddha upayoga taNI ! basanI rAha jotAMya zuddha upayoga ! 216 jJAna pachI jAgRtinI zrI ziphTa ! 218 247 goThavaNIpUrvaka hoya tyAM na hoya... sAmAyika, pratikramaNa rAkhe zuddha... kAramAM zuddha upayoganI goThavaNI ! 248 213 have Avaze. mokSa sAmo !! 211 214 249 na mUkAya eka kSaNa vIlo AtmAne ! 250 zuddha upayoga, ekjhekTanesama...... 253 bhakti konI ? jaDanI ke cetananI 256 vAMcatA cukAya upayoga Ama ! zAstro vAMcatA upayoga ! upayogamAM rahevAnI vADa ! vizeSa phoDa zuddha upayoganA ! upayoga cUkAvAnA 5 sthAna.... gADha anubhUti pachI upayoga sahaja ! svasamaya, parasamaya ne zuddha upayoga ! enuM jJAna - dhyAna manohArI ! bhIkha pUjAvAnI ! kSullaka bAbate zuddha upayoga cUkAya ! paisAmAM upayoga kevo cokkasa ! vAMcatI vakhate ya zuddha upayoga ! zuddha upayoga bolatI vakhateya ! pAmyA niraMtara pratIti ! jANyuM tenI varte pratIti ! na bhUlAya anubhava kadI ! phera, zraddhA ane pratItimAM ! pratIti mAtra AtmA mATe ! ajAyaba prApti eka kalAkamAM ! 220 221 222 vyAkhyA darzanamoha taNI ! vyAkhyA cAritramoha tI ! kSAyaka samakitanI vyAkhyA ! rahyo bAkI te cAritramoha ! 262 223 A che sthULa svarUpe, zuddha upayoga ! 263 225 to ya e zuddha upayoga ! 264 265 sAmAyika samaye upayoga ! judo sadA gAnAro, sAMbhaLanAra.... 267 226 227 227 228 230 231 234 234 4. anubhava lakSa pratIti 235 varte zukladhyAna re ! 277 alakhanuM lakSa ! 239 279 280 - adhavacce aTavAya jhAMkharAmAM ! 260 avatAro vadhe TI.vI.nA mohathI ! 261 dAdA joDe niraMtara rahI zake... 282 283 283 jJAnI niraMtara anubhava padamAM ! mahAtmAonuM sTeja kSAyaka samakti ! jJAna pachI, lakSa ane pratIti 2..... 285 jJAnIone na hoya raTaNa ! raTaNa karye sahajatA baMdha ! sahaja bhAve rahe te sAcuM ! 287 aMta e lAve zuddha upayoga. 68 Ama cUkAya upayoga khAtI vakhate.... 270 Ama rahe upayoga jamatI vakhate... 271 upayoga upara upayoga ! 273 tIrthaMkaroe darzAvela zuddha upayoga.... 274 niraMtara zuddha upayoga e ja... 234 - na bhUle 'huM vaDopradhAna" ! saMpUrNa anubhava zAthI nahIM ? yathArtha anubhavanI khAtrI ! zuddhAtmArUpa kyAre thavAya ? lakSaNo AtmAnubhava taNAM ! niraMtara cetavanAro koNa ? jJAtA-draSTApadane cetavanAro ! TekAzAna vinA nahIM pUrNAhuti ! anubhava kone ? 288 jJAna-darzana e ja parama jyoti ! 303 5. cAritramoha 288 302 305 ya 324 325 306 eskyujha le te ya cAritramoha ! samabhAve nikAlathI mukti ... 306 dAdAnuM cAritra, cAritramoha vinAnuM ! 326 AjJA pALavAthI jAya dhAtIkarmo ! 331 309 54 89 289 290 291 292 294 294 295 298 300

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333 ja00 kADhavo moha to jaDamULathI ja ! 308 jAya jJAnathI darzanamoha ne AjJAthI... 332 na bolAya cAritramoha kSAyaka... 39 vaTaluM ukale te cAritramoha ! tIrthaMkara janmyA tyArathI ja... 310 Ukale DijhAIna pramANe... 334 samati pachInAM karmo. 310 DakhovALo cAritramoha ! 336 ahoho ! tIrthakaronA phoDa ! 311 joyA vagaranuM te dhoyA vagaranuM ! 337 akrama mArgamAM cAritramoha ! 312 dhovuM paDe palALeluM chelluM kapaDuM ! 338 mahAtmAono cAritramoha ! 315 bharelAno karo nikAla ! 340 vAvelA bInuM AvyuM A phaLa ! 317 na hoya udayakarma mahAtmAone ! 34 triyonI kriyA have cAritramoha ! 318 e kevaLa darzana ! 341 DiscArja mohano kara samabhAve.... 319 upayogapUrvaka DiscArja, tyAM AnaMda ! 342 cAritramoha thAya zuddha tapathI ! 321 viSamabhAve azuddha, samabhAve zuddha ! 343 khapAvo jAgRtipUrvaka cAritramoha ! 322 cAritramohano na thAya tiraskAra ! 343 323 tanmayAkAra nathI te nathI cAritramoha !345 akrama vijJAnanI geranTI ! 324 judApaNAthI, chUTAya cAritramohathI ! 346 6.1 karmabaMdhata, tavuM - jUtuM ! siddhAMta, karmabaMdha taNo ! 349 kaDavA phaLamAM AnaMda AvarAya ! 35ra jJAnAgnithI bhasmIbhUta karmo ! 349 6.2 AcAra sudhAravA ! akrama eTale AcaraNamAM nahIM te ! 353 AcAra, vicAra ne uccAra, hoya.... 360 na vaDhavuM paDe vijJAnanAM kAraNe ! 354 mokSano mArga aMtarmukhI ! 361 hoya A AcArasaMhitAno mArga ! 355 na khoLo AcAra akramamAM ! 362 mahAtmA bhItarathI sadA saMyamI ! 358 jevA bhAve baMdha, tevA bhAve nirjarA ! 363 na palaTe AcAra, phare bhAva ! 359 na bolAya 'have vAMdho nathI' ! 363 akramamAM uDADyo bAhyAcAra ! 359 6.3 pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartata ? na kaDhAya bhUla vartananI ! 368 samajAya tema Ave vartanamAM ! 373 zraddhA - anubhava - vartana 368 suvAsathI loka kheMcAya ! 374 chelle thai javAze rAnI ! 37 na jozo DisiplIna, paNa jo jo.... 375 kharato jAya moha ! 371 mahIM joyA karavAthI ja zuddhikaraNa ! 381 jJAna phiTa thayuM pratItimAM ! 7. spila puruSArtha AjJA' pALavAthI sAco puruSArtha... 383 nizcaya rUpI puruSArtha ! 387 puSArtha : AjJArUpI, svabhAvika ! 384 puruSArtha sadAya sakrIya ! 389 jJAtA-draSTA e ja kharo puruSArtha ! 385 mokSamArga eTale so TacanuM sonuM ! 389 jJAna-ajJAna bhede te riyala puruSArtha ! 386 kAma kADhI lo dAdAnI hAjarImAM... 390 puruSArtha karAve koNa ? 387 dAdAno aMtima saMdezo, mahAtmAone...391 8. zukladhyAta. akrama mArge zukladhyAna ! 393 jJAnI e ja mAro AtmA ! 398 zuddhAtmAnA dhyAnanI zI rIte ? 394 adhyAtmanI cAra cokaDIo ! 398 AtmAnA svarUpano khyAla rAkhavo.... 395 akramathI saraLa prApya mokSa ! 399 nizcayathI zukladhyAna ne vyavahArathI... 396 enuM nAma zukladhyAna ! jJAna pachI nahIM Arta-raudradhyAna re ! 397 AtmAnuM spaSTa-aspaSTa vaMdana ! tyAre e chello avatAra ! 398 9. ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAtathI ! mahatmAonuM vyaktitva saurabha ! 403 chuTo ja raheze AvatA bhave ! 418 jIvatAM mokSa thayAnI pArAzIzI ! 407 AvatA bhave A "jJAna" raheze ? 419 mokSanI gADImAM beThA pachI utAvaLa ? 408 javAze mahAvideha kSetre !! mokSa mATe bAkI keTaluM ? 410 jAhojalAlI pAMca AjJA thakI ! 422 lobhiyo kevo, mokSa mATe ? 411 kayAre javAnA mokSe ! rakhaDI koNa paDe ? 412 mokSamAM saba samAna ! mRtyu samayanI jAgRti ! 414 ame chelle jaizuM ! aMta samaya sAcavaze dAdA ! 415 pAchA pharAya, mahAvidehathI ? thaze samAdhi maraNa ! 416 vijhA maLyA, TikiTa bAkI ! mRtyunI vedanA vakhate... 417 10. akrama vijJAtI balihArI. vijJAna eTale keza beMka ! 427 ahaMkAra sajIvana kyAre ! 433 anaMta aMdhakArane ajavALAM akrama. 427 akramamAM lapasavAnA traNa sthAnako ! 434 paTaMtara pamADanArane sarvasva samarpaNa ! 428 pratyakSa jJAnIne pUchI pUchIne ja... 434 bIja pachI pUnamanA paMthe ! 429 jJAna pahelAMnI dAdAnI anubhUtio... 435 akramamAM sAdhanA zI ? 430 dAdAnI hAjarInI anubhUti ! 438 parigrahanuM paribaLa akramamAM ! 430 buddhi baMdha to bhagavAna pUrNa pragaTe ! 438 jJAnano apaco kyAre ? 431 mahAtmAo bhagavAna thaIne raheze... 439 akramamAM paDavAno bhaya ? 432 372

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prAptisthAna muMbaI : pUjya DaoN. nIrubahena amIna, 904-bI, navInaAzA epArTamenTa, dAdA sAheba phALake roDa, dAdara (se. 2.), muMbaI-400014 phona : (022) 4137616 Mobile : 9820-153953 amadAvAda : zrI dIpakabhAI desAI, 5, mamatApArka sosAyaTI, navagujarAta kolejanI pAchaLa, usmAnapurA, amadAvAda-380013. phona : (079) 7540408, 7543979, 6421154. pheksa : 408528 E-Mail : dimple@ad1.vsnl.net.in : zrI dhIrajabhAI paTela, 'jJAnAMjana', sI-17, pallava pArka sosAyaTI, vI.AI.pI. roDa, kArelIbAga, vaDodarA. phona : (0265) 441627 vaDodarA rAjakoTa surata U.S.A. U.K. : zrI rUpeza mahetA, e-3, naMdanavana epArTamenTa, gujarAta samAcAra presanI sAme, rAjakoTa. phona : (0281) 234597 Africa : zrI viThThalabhAI paTela, 35, zAMtivana sosAyaTI, laMbe hanumAna roDa, paMcaratna TAvara pAchaLa, surata. phona : (0261) 544964 : Dada Bhagwan Vignan Institue : Dr. Bachu Amin, 902 SW Mifflin Rd, Topeka, Kansas 66606. Tel. : (913) 271-0869 Fax : (913) 271-8641 E-mail : amin0@ibm.net Dr. Shirish Patel, 2659 Raven Circle, Corona, Ca 91720 Tel. : (909) 734-4715. Fax : (909) 734-4411 : Mr. Maganbhai Patel,2, Winifred Terrace, Enfield, Great Cambridge Road, London, Middlesex, ENI 1HH U.K. Tel : 181-245-1751 Mr. Ramesh Patel, 636, Kenton Road, Kenton Harrow. Tel. : 181-204-0746 Fax :181-907-4885 Canada : Mr. Suryakant N. Patel, 1497, Wilson Ave, Appt.#308, Downsview, Onterio, Toronto. M3M 1K2, CANADA. Tel. : (416) 247-8309 : Mr. Manu Savla, PISU & Co., Box No. 18219, Nairobi, Kenya, Tel : (R) (25411)744943(O) 554836 Fax : 545237 Internet :WWW.dadashri.org

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AtAvANI zreNI 12 (pUrvArdha) [1.1] AtmajAgRti jAgRti, zuddhAtmA svarUpanI ! praznakartA : jAgRti eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : UMghavuM nahIM te. AkhuM jagata ughADI AMkhe UMdhe che. koI paNa mANasa evo nathI ke je ughADI AMkhe nA UMghato hoya. presiDenTo, oNphisaro, pradhAno badhAya ughADI AMkhe UMdhe, jAgRti Ave to 'caMdubhAI" (caMdubhAInI jagyAe vAcake potAnuM nAma samajavuM.) zuM kare che e badhuM ja 'jANe'. sAMje vigatavAra lakhI lAve hale. evI jAgRti lokone kharI ? ane hitAhitanuM bhAna hoya, enuM nAma jAgRti. hitAhitanuM bhAna manuSyone che ja kyAM ? zAstrakAroe lakhyuM, to zAstrakArone zuM AnI upara dveSa hato, te AvuM lakhyuM ? AkhuM jagata, temAM sAdhu-saMnyAsIo je saMyamI nathI e paNa ughADI AMkhe UMghI rahyA che ane sAdhuomAM koI saMyamI hoya to jAgato kahevAya. paNa saMyama hoya kyAMthI ? ko'ka hoya vakhate, paNa maLavA muzkela che. tamane khulAso thayo thoDo ghaNo ? "caMdubhAI" zuM kare che e dekhAtuM nathI 'tamane' ? praznakartA : dekhAya che. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : ane 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e keTalA vakhata khyAla rahe che ? praznakartA : niraMtara. dAdAzrI : zuddhAtmA thaI gayA. niraMtara pratIti kahevAya ! praznakartA H dAdA maLI gayA hoya, dAdAnuM jJAna maLI gayuM hoya to ja e jAgRti utpanna thAya ne ? dAdAzrI : enI vAta ja judI hoya. banatAM sudhI jAgRti hovI muzkela che. kAraNa ke A kALamAM jAgRti nA rahe. ko'ka ja, bahu javalle koIne hoya ! e janmajAta hoya ! janmajAta jAgRti laIne Avyo hoya. meM jJAna ApyA pachI je jAgRti zarU thaI jAya, te pachI jAya nahIM. keTalI ajAyabI che ke pachI jAgRti jatI ja nathI ! niraMtara jAgRti rahe che !! karatAro judo jAmyo e ja jAgRti ! praznakartA : dAdA, jAgRti kone kahevI ? eTale dAkhalA tarIke krodha thaI gayo, ciDAI gayA e prakRtinI vAta thaI. e ja kSaNe "mane khyAla AvI jAya ke 'caMdulAle' A krodha karyo, e ja jAgRti kahevAya ne ! dAdAzrI : e ja jAgRti. 'tame' jANI gayA. praznakartA : hA, paNa emAM jo moDA paDyA to eTalI jAgRti ochI ? dAdAzrI : moDA paDyA eTale A karmano udaya cIkaNo, eTale vAra lAgI. ko'ka theMkyo, e jo moLuM hoyane, to tarata dhoI nAkhIe ane cIkaNuM hoya to vAra lAge. cIkaNuM karma eTalI jAgRti moDI. jo cIkaNuM nA hoya ne to kazuM nA thAya. bhale moDI nIkaLI paNa jAgRti to che ne ! jAgato che ne ! jAgato mANasa bole ke abe kauna hai ? to cora jatA rahe, paNa jayAM bole ja nahIM tyAM to sahu laIne ja jAya ! ajJAnIne ApaNe ema kahIe, 'Avo kema doSa karo cho ?' to

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AtmajAgRti UlaTo kahe, 'e to A chokaro sIdho rahe evo nathI.' jo potAno doSa samajAya nahIM ane pArakAnA doSa ja mAlUma paDe e ajJAnInI nizAnI. e niraMtara baMdhAyA kare ane eno mAra khAyA kare. ane jJAnInI nizAnI zuM ? jJAnI kRpA koNa prApta karI gayo ? tarata ja potAnA doSa dekhAya e jAgRti hoya ane emAMthI kema karIne chUTavuM e ja bhAva niraMtara rahe. pahelethI chellA sTezananI musApharI ! paheluM che te zuddhAtmA ane je paramAtmA che te jAte khuda, riyala vastu che, e sTezana juduM che ane zuddhAtmA sTezana juduM che. zuddhAtmA e to vastu svarUpanuM pahelAmAM paheluM 'paruM' che. pachI evA keTalAMya 'parAM' Ave, tyAre pachI mULa sTezana Ave. jema jema anubhava vadhatAM jAyane tema tema 'paruM' AgaLanuM AvatuM jAya, sTezana badalAtuM jAya. A pahelAM sTezane tamane utArI pADyA che, mokSanI bAunDrImAM. zuddhAtmA e paheluM sTezana, tyAMthI senTrala sTezana tarapha jAya, tyAre pachI chelve sTezana Ave. ahIM peThelo jAgRtimAM rahyA kare. jAgRti nAmanuM pada UbhuM thaI jAya. pote potAnA doSa dekhatA thAya, badhI jAgRti udayAkAra nA thAya. udayano vAMdho nahIM, udayAkAra thAya teno vAMdho che. udaya to jJAnIne ya hoya ane ajJAnIne ya hoya. praznakartA H ko'ka vakhata sva-paranI jAgRti rahe tyAre nirmaLatAno aMza AvI jAya. dAdAzrI : e AgaLanAM bIjA sTezane pahoMcavAnI taiyArIo. enAthI ya AgaLa javuM paDaze. e kharo mokSano puruSArtha ja tyArathI zarU thAya che. jJAnI puruSanA pAsethI AtmajJAna je samajamAM AvI gayuM, enAthI parAM zarU thaI jAya. bAkI sAdhuo bole 'zuddhAtmA', to kazuM vaLe nahIM. anaMta avatAra sudhI gA gA kare, toya kazuM vaLe nahIM. zuddhAtmAnuM bhAna thavuM joIe ane 'huM caMdulAla chuM" e bhAna chUTI javuM joIe. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jAgRti dekhADe tijadoSo ! tame tamArI bhUlone dekho cho, ATaluM badhuM dekho cho e jAgRti ochI kahevAya ?! mANasa potAnI bhUla joI nA zake. moTA sAdhumahArAja hoya ne, te potAnI bhUla to be-traNa joI zake. praznakartA : jJAna pachI jAgRti to darekane Ave. dAdAzrI : niraMtara, covIse kalAkanI jAgRti rahevI joIe. jo amArA kahyA pramANe, amArI saMpUrNa AjJA pramANe rahe ne eka ciMtA thAya to be lAkha rUpiyAno dAvo mAMDajo, kahyuM chene ! praznakartA: jAgRti koIne ochI rahetI hoya, to eno artha evo thayo ke ApanI je AjJA che e pALavAmAM kacAza che ? dAdAzrI : AjJA pALavAnI je zakti che ne, te pelI jAgRti ochI rahe eTale AjJA pALI zake nahIM bicAro. ane pANI nA zake eTale enuM phaLa evuM maLe. eTale AjJA pALavAnI to bicArAne icchA badhI bahu che, paNa jAgRti kema ochI rahe che ? tyAre kahe che, amuka amuka evA karmo bAMdhelAM che, ke jene mATe traNa kalAka UbhuM rahevuM paDe eka jagyAe ane je sIdhA mANaso che ne, e to eka vicAra Avyo, te dasa-paMdara miniTamAM eno niveDo lAvI nAkhe. te ene A jJAna hAjara rahe barobara, kampliTa, paNa koI mANasa to kalAka-kalAka sudhI emAM che. te khovAI jAya. eTale A jJAnamAM tyAM AgaLa loco paDI jAya. chatAM A jJAna ene helpa karaze. kAraNa ke nikAlI bAbata che ne, peluM nikAla thatuM thatuM cIkaNo mAla UDI jaze ane pachI pelo sAro mAla Avaze. jAgRti e nathI IphekTa ! praznakartA : jAgRti e iphekTa che ? dAdAzrI : jAgRtine iphekTa kahevAya nahIM. jAgRti e ApaNo puruSArtha ja che. eTale ene iphekTa kahevAya nahIM. ane e koInI para DIpenDanTa nathI.

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AtmajAgRti praznakartA : e kevI rItanA thAya ? dAdAzrI : eTale ame A jJAna ApIe ane AjJAmAM rahe eTale jAgRti utpanna thAya. AjJA pALavAthI jAgRti utpanna thAya. A jAgRti to hoya che ja. paNa AjJAmAM nahIM hovAthI A badhI asaro thayA kare che. eTale e pelI jAgRti UDI jAya. jAgRti e iphekTa nathI. A to jAgRti e ja AtmA che. saMpUrNa jAgRti e phUla AtmA. jeTalI jAgRti eTalo AtmA ane jeTalI ajAgRti eTaluM A pudgala ! praznakartA : AmAM lapaTAI jaIzuM evo bhaya nathI raheto, paNa manamAM ema thAya ke hajI enDa nathI Avyo. dAdAzrI : atyAre enDa to Ave ja nahIM. enDa to bahu dahADe Ave. ane jyAre enDa Avaze tyAre manamAM bhAve ya nahIM hoya. praznakartA H iphekTa nA thAya evuM thaI jAya to sAruM, e rahe basa ! dAdAzrI : iphekTa to thayA ja kare. mAla bharelo hoya te iphekTa thAyane ! ane iphekTa thAya eTale jAgRti hoya, nahIM to jAgRti nA hoya. praznakartA : chUTavA pUratI vAta kahI tyAM sudhI ikvezana barAbara che, paNa svasattA zemAM che ? dAdAzrI : je bhUla thAya che ane jAgRti rahe che ne cetave che, e svasattA che. praznakartA : e svasattAno anubhava karAvone ? dAdAzrI : hamaNAM thAya nahIM. devuM pAra vagaranuM. devuM vALyA vagara sattA utpanna thAya nahIM ne ! devu badhuM patI jAya pachI svasattA utpanna thAya. parasattAmAM kyAMya nA pese tyAM svasattA che. jJAta hAjara e ja jAgRti ! vItarAgatA sudhInI jAgRti hoya. jAgRti manane coMTavA ja nA de, AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) buddhine coMTavA nA de, koIne coMTavA ja nA de koI jagyAe ane ajAgRti coMTI paDe. 6 praznakartA H jAgRti e AtmAnuM lakSa meLavavA mATe ja ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, lakSa to maLI gayuM. jAgRti eTale A pAMca vAkyo sAthe tarata ja jAgrata thaI jAya, eTale jJAna hAjara thaI jAya. darekamAM jene jJAna hAjara thAya, enuM nAma jAgRti. dareka vakhate, tame pada bolatAM hoya te padano zabdezabda dekhAya tyAre jANavuM ke A jAgRti. A ame bolAvIe sImaMdhara svAmIne namaskAra, te ghaDIe amArI jAgRti te pramANe ja karatI hoya. te jAgRti vadhAravAnI che. Ama karatAM karatAM vadhatI jAya. thoDI Aje vadhe, thoDI kAle vadhe. ema karatAM karatAM saMpUrNa jAgRti vadhe. jAgRti ja lAvavAnI che. saMpUrNa jAgRti e ja kevaLajJAna che. jAgRtithI potAnA doSo badhuM ja dekhAya. jagata jAgrata ja nathI ne ughADI AMkhe nidrAmAM phare che. sAmAnA doSa kADhavA, enuM nAma jAgRti nathI. e to ajJAnIne bahu hoya. sAmAnA doSa bilakule ya dekhAya nahIM. potAnA doSa dekhavAmAM bilakula navaro paDe ja nahIM, enuM nAma jAgRti. dAdAnI jAgRtitI jhalaka ! che jAgRti konuM nAma ? amane che te kRSNa bhagavAnanuM nAma letAM ja, emanuM je citra joyuM che e yAda Ave, citra hau dekhAya ane mULa svarUpe kRSNa bhagavAna dekhAya, evI jAgRti rahe. mahAvIra bhagavAnanuM nAma lo, to bhagavAna mahAvIre ya dekhAya ane zabde ya bolAya. enuM nAma jAgRti. A to zabda bolo cho te ghaDIe zabdamAM jAge che ane enA mULamAM jAgato nathI. ame eka eka zabda bolIe te zabdamAM, ame emAM jAgRta ja hoIe. jAgRti evI hoya. ame sImaMdhara svAmI zabda bolatAMnI sAthe phoTo-boTo badhuM dekhAya, mULa svarUpe ya dekhAya, badhIya jAgRti rahe. jAgRti niraMtara rahe, e ja chevaTe pUrNAhuti thAya che. saMsAra eTale ajAgRti. bhagavAna baMdha AMkhe jAgatA hatA, ame ya baMdha AMkhe jAgIe chIe. praznakartA : ko'kanI vAta evI hoya ke hasavuM Ave to te vakhate

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AtmajAgRti A kevI rItano upayoga hoya, dAdA ? Apano kevI rIte upayoga rahe ? dAdAzrI : amane hasavuM nA Ave. mane to hasavuM ja nA Ave ! koI dahADo hasyo nathI. ane amAre to koI vakhata Ave toya upayoga hoya ja. toya ame upayoga cUkIe nahIM. praznakartA: kaI rItano hoya upayoga tamAro ? dAdAzrI: e rIta vaLI kevI ene ? jAgRti ja AkhI saMpUrNa. saMpUrNa dIvo jalyA ja karato hoya to emAM rIta kevI ! enI rIto hotI haze ? praznakartA: kevI jAgRti hoya ? dAdAzrI : dIvo saLagato hoya evuM rAkhIe chIe ame. heya ! lAITa cAlyA karatuM hoya. niraMtara dIvo saLage pachI. rAtre-dahADe tIrthakarone je nijadoSa dekhAya te amane doSa dekhAya, duniyA to tyAM pahoMceya nahIM kyAreya paNa evI jagyAnA doSa dekhAya. tIrthakarone je dekhAya che. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : pote jue to prekTikalamAM AvyuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : peluM prekTikala. prekTikalamAM Ave te ja sAcuM. eTale ame koIne doSa nA kahIe, ke tamArA ATalA doSa che, sudhArajo. evuM tevuM nA kahIe. praznakartA : ApaNane saheja koIvAra Ama naimittika Takora thAya. dAdAzrI : e to saheja thaI jAya ko'kanI joDe. bahu najIkano hoyane tenI joDe thaI jAya, nahIM to nA hoya amAre. kAraNa ke ene potAne dekhAya to ja kAmanuM che. nahIM to huM kahune e to UlaTuM silakamAM Ama paDI rahe A bAju ne emAM ja dhyAna rahyA kare. e kAmamAM zuM lAge ? badhuM Ama vidhio kare, sevA kare eTale pachI jAgRti vadhatI jAya mahIM ! praznakartA : Apane to tamAma bAbatomAM kampliTa jAgRti hoya. dAdAzrI : jo mane e saMsAranI bAbatamAM bilakula jAgRti nA hoya. Aja zuM 'vAra' che, tenIya jAgRti nA hoya. praznakartA: dAdA Apa kaho cho ke AmAM amAre jAgRti nA hoya paNa e phITa nathI thatuM. dAdAzrI : phITa zI rIte thAya ? praznakartA : tyAre jJAna che eTale badhI vastu ene lakSamAM hoya paNa emAM upekSA hoya ? dAdAzrI : nA. enI smRti nA hoya. smRti nA hoya to upayoga nA hoya, eTale Dakhalo nA hoya. tyAM AtmAnI vRtti ja nA hoyane e bAju. deha sAthe kAmanI vAto karIe, bIjuM badhuM karIe. sthiratApUrvaka jAgRti rAkhIe, smRti nahIM. - niraMtara jeno kevaLamAM mukAma che, tyAM bIje zemAM hoya ?! niraMtara kevaLamAM ja mukAma che, ebsolyuTamAM ! tethI to ame kahyuM ke tame kahetA hatAne ke ame tamane tIrthaMkara kahIe to zuM che emAM ? nA. tIrthaMkara kahezo praznakartA : badhAMyanA ? dAdAzrI : nA, nA. amArA ja. badhAMne to mAre zuM kAma che ? ame to bIjAnA doSa ja nA joIe koInA. dekhAya kharAM paNa doSita joIe nahIM. ame to nirdoSa ja joIe. doSa dekhAtAnI sAthe ja nirdoSa joIe. praznakartA : mahAtmAnI bhUla thatI hoya to dAdAe kahevuM joIene ke A bhUla thAya che ? dAdAzrI : nA, nA. mAre zuM levAdevA ? praznakartA : pUche to nahIM kahevAnuM ? dAdAzrI : e to potAe ja khoLI kADhavAnA rahyA. ame evuM kahIe nahIM. amAruM kahevuM e to pachI enuM zuM thAya ke e to thiyarImAM gayuM. e to ame kahIe nahIMne evuM !

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AtmajAgRti 10 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) to A kALa pote virodha uThAvaze. eTale A ja phUla sTeja che atyAre, tethI ema kahyuMne ! have A mahIM phUla sTeja ene 'dAdA bhagavAna' kahe che. A bahAra 356 DigrI thaI ne mahIM phUla sTeje che. apUrNa, chatAM niraMtara jAgRti ! je kALe je mAphaka Ave te siddhAMta kAma lAge. pelo siddhAMta kAma nA lAgyo. ane kalyANakArI A mArga che ATalo. nahIM to karoDo avatAre A mokSa pamAya evo nathI. ane tamAre to mahIM cetave pAchuM ke A khoTuM thaI rahyuM che. e mokSe laI javA phare che. ane je mahIM jAgRti e ja AtmA che, bIjuM kazuM nathI AtmA. tamane jAgRta kare evI aMdara jAgRti utpanna thaI, e moTAmAM moTuM Azcarya che. - niraMtara jAgRti rahevI joIe. eka sekanDa paNa ajAgRti rahe e cAle nahi. saMpUrNa jAgRti nA rahe paNa amuka aMze, niraMtara hoya ! saMpUrNa jAgRti thAya tyAre kevaLajJAna kahevAya. saMpUrNa ane niraMtara ! A apUrNa ne niraMtara e A jAgRti zarU thaI jAya. praznakartA : apUrNa ane niraMtara jAgRti e nA samajyo. dAdAzrI : eTale kevaLajJAna nahIM. pUrNa hota to kevaLajJAna kahevAta. eTale tamAre have puruSArtha karavAno rahyo, tame puruSa thayA mATe. to have tame puruSArtha karo. jeTalI AjJA pALo eTaluM mahIM jAgRti vadhatI jAya, pUrNatA utpanna thatI jAya. jyAM jAgRti pahoMcI e ja AtmA najIka pahoMcyA. jeTaluM najIka gayA, eTaluM ajavALuM vadhAre eTalo prakAza thato jAya. prajJA ane jAgRtinI jugala joDI ! praznakartA : prajJAzakti ane jAgRtimAM kaMI phera ? dAdAzrI : e jAgRti phUla(pUrNa) thAya eTale pyaoNra thatuM thatuM phUla thAya tyAre kevaLajJAna kahevAya. prajJAzakti pachI khalAsa thAya che. prajJAzakti ApaNane mokSe jatAM sudhI helpa kare. AtmA to niraMtara kevaLajJAna ja che. ajavALAne kazuM aDe nahIM. praznakartA: have mokSamAM pahoMcI gayA pachI jAgRti kAMI kAma kare kharI ? dAdAzrI : nA, pachI jAgRti hoya ja nahIM. tyAM to prakAza ja ! pote ja hoya. praznakartA H eTale TheTha sudhI jAgRti ane prajJAzakti hoya ? dAdAzrI : hA, prajJAzakti ane jAgRti be sAthe cAle. prajJAzakti ene vALa vALa kare ane jAgRti e pakaDI le. Ama mukhya che jAgRti ja ! praznakartA jAgRtithI upayoga rahe ke upayogathI jAgRti rahe ? dAdAzrI : nA, jAgRtithI upayoga rahe ane upayoga hoya to pharI jAgRti utpanna thAya. praznakartA : A to maraghImAMthI iMDu ane iMDAmAMthI maraghI ? dAdAzrI : nahIM, paNa e upayoga evI vastu nathI. jAgRti ja mukhya vastu che ane e jAgRti saMpUrNa thaI, enuM nAma kevaLajJAna che. bIjuM kazuM che nahi. upayoga to jAgRtinuM pariNAma che. zuddha upayoga jAgRtinuM pariNAma che ane zubha upayoge ya jAgRtinuM pariNAma che. paNa e bhrAMtinI jAgRti hoya ane A jJAna jAgRti hoya. jAgRtine Topa para laI javI e ApaNo dharma, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. praznakartA : jAgRti che temAM ApaNane dekhAya ke ATalA aMtarAya che. AnAthI vadhAre doDAtuM nathI. eTale jyAM jyAM sUkSmatAe pahoMcavA jaIe tyAM tyAM AkhuM AvarAtuM dekhAya ke jANe bhIMta vacce AvI gaI. have AgaLa nathI pahoMcAtuM e enAlisisamAM, to doSonA pratikramaNa karIe, je asara thAya te mAlama paDe che, pote chUTo rahe che, paNa je enI sUkSmatAe nirmULa thavuM joIe e baMdha thatuM nathI.

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AtmajAgRti AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : e TAIma leze. eTale badhI sUkSmatA ja Ave. paNa sUkSmatAthI haju bahu AgaLa javAnuM che. e badhAM killA oLaMge tyAre AtmA vasaMvedanamAM Ava. praznakartA : e ja spaSTa vedana kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA. paNa spaSTa vedana thatAM ya pahelAM vasaMvedana potAne mAlama paDe. svasaMvedana vadhatuM jAya ne, eTale ApaNe jANIe ke e vadhI vadhIne kyAM sudhI jaze ? tyAre kahe, spaSTa vedana sudhI. paNa dhIme dhIme jAgRti vadhI jAya tyAre. - saMpUrNa jAgRti e kevaLajJAna che ane kevaLajJAna e khuda paramAtmA che ane e khuda paramAtmAnI sAthe ame vAtacIta karIe chIe niraMtara ane tame amArI joDe beThAM pachI duHkha hoya koIne ? khuda paramAtmA koI dahADo pragaTa thatA nathI, covIsa tIrthaMkaro sivAya khuda paramAtmA pragaTa thayelA nathI ! bhegAM thavAnI zarUAta thaI jAya che. kevaLajJAnanAM 360deg pUrA thAya, tyAre kevaLajJAna thAya. 356deg mane rahyuM. A tamane aMzo bhegAM thatAM thatAM 356 sudhI jazene ? A dhyAnamAM rahezo, to e kevaLajJAnanuM kAraNa che. A. kevaLajJAna e ja mokSa che. mokSa e ja kevaLajJAna che. e A mokSanuM kAraNa ja A che, pratyakSa mokSanuM ane dAdA jevI dazAmAM avAya e ja ne ! caDavA mAMDyuM eTale je rastethI huM caDyo te raste tame caDo eTale jyAM huM Ubho chuM tyAM tame AvIne UbhA raho. mAre AgaLa rasto baMdha che. tamAro rasto cAlu che. vadhe jAgRti Ama ! praznakartA : jAgRti kevI rIte vadhe ? dAdAzrI : have jJAna ApyA pachI jAgatA thAya, tyAra pachI pAMca AjJA jeTalI pALe eTalI enI jAgRti vadhatI jAya. ane jAgRtithI e AjJA pALI ya zakAya ane tenAthI jAgRti pAchI vadhatI ya jAya. bIjo koI upAya nathI. praznakartA : dAdA, paNa Ama jJAtA-draSTA padamAM rahevA mATe jAgRti vadhe evuM ? kaMI karavAnuM kharuM ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti badhI vadhI javAnI. dAdAnuM jJAna le, pAMca AjJA pALe to narI jAgRti che. praznakartA : e pAMca AjJA amArI Ama vadhAre sArI rIte pALIe, enA mATe zuM karIe ? dAdAzrI : hA. e ethI vadhAre thaze badhuM. dAdAnA AzIrvAda lIdhA eTale vadhe. jema AzIrvAda laIe, darzana karIe, vidhi karIe to vadhatuM jAya. praznakartA : jAgRti vadhAravA mATe pratikramaNanuM hathiyAra e vadhAre kAma Avene ? ta pathya A kALe koIne kevaLajJAta ! A jJAnano artha zuM che ? jAgRti. zuddhAtmA e bIjI koI vastu nathI, jAgRti ja che. have jAgRti vadhe, te jAgRti ApaNane mahIM duHkha utpanna nA thavA de, ApaNane mahIM ahaMkAra Ubho thavA de, evuM tevuM kazuM thavA nA de; pachI bIjuM zuM joIe ? pachI to A caMdubhAInuM nATaka jovAnuM, DrAmA jovAno. jAgRti vadhavI joIe. kevaLajJAna eTale saMpUrNa jAgRti, eka aMza ajAgRti nahIM. ane A vijJAna e ja kevaLajJAna che. jJAtA-draSTA ja rahevAnuM sAyansa che AkhuM. meM tamane kevaLajJAna ApyuM che. paNa pacatuM nathI A jJAna, eTale tamane thoDA aMze ochuM raheze. mane cAra aMze ochuM rahe che. to tamane ethI vadhAre aMze ochuM rahe. nathI pacatuM teno vAMdho zo che ? ApaNuM jJAna koIne vAMdho Ave evuM nathI. A jJAna maLyuM ne AjJA pALo cho, tyArathI kevaLajJAnanAM aMzo

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AtmajAgRti 13 14. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : hA, te hathiyAra vAparavAnuM ja che ne, pratikramaNathI zuM thAya ke jAgRti vadhe eTaluM ja nahIM, bIjo badho bahu lAbha thAya. jAgRtatuM sAnidhya vadhAre jAgRti ! praznakartA: jAgRti vadhe che, paNa bahu vadhAravI hoya to zuM karavuM? dAdAzrI : jAgRti vadhAravI hoya teNe jAgrata joDe besavuM. evuM che ne, badhA jhokAM khAtA hoya to pachI ApaNane ya jhokAM Ave. badhA jAgRta joDe hoya to, jo jhokuM AvatuM hoya eya baMdha thaI jAya. mATe jAgRta joDe besavuM. atyAre rAga hoya to bahu tyAre jJAnI upara thAya ke jJAnInA pholoarsa upara thAya, bIjo bahAra to nathI thato ne ? praznakartA : bIjo rAga nA thAya. dAdAzrI : pAchaLanAM kAraNo to badhAM ajAgRtivALA ja hatA. atyAre je jJAna ApyuM che e pachInA kAraNo AjJAmAM rahe to teTalI jAgRti UMcI rahe. praznakartA: to atyAranAM jAgRtine aTakAvanArA kAraNo kayAM ? dAdAzrI : mArI joDe bahu paricayamAM nA avAtuM hoya, mArI vAta pUrI samajAtI nA hoya. praznakartA : ApanI vAtane pote pUrNa rIte samajI zake kharo ? dAdAzrI : kema nA samajI zake? paricayamAM rahe ne pote samajavAnuM nakkI karyuM che, pachI kema nA samajI zake ? praznakartA nakkI karyA chatAM hajI nathI samajAtuM, enuM zuM kAraNa ? dAdAzrI : paricaya nathI. eno sAMdho kApI nAkhe che. Aja be kalAka beTho ane pAchuM kAcuM kapAyuM ne pAcho bIje dA'De be kalAka nakAmA jAya, enA karatAM AkhuM lAMbA samaya sudhI akhaMDa beTho hoya ne, to ukela Ave. praznakartA : paNa e to pachI bahAranA saMyogane AdhIna che ne A to ? Apano sAMdho meLavavAno nizcaya hoya.... dAdAzrI : to A rAgane to pratyakSa mokSanuM kAraNa kahyuM che. e rAgathI to ApaNe emanI pAse besavAnA saMjogo bhegA thAya ne enuM phaLa ApaNane jAgRti UbhI thaI jAya. dIvo jhapATAbaMdha saLagato thaI jAya. sTezana para pleTaphorma para beThA hoyane badhA, ApaNI joDevALA beThelA badhA jhokAM khAtAM hoya to pachI ApaNe satsaMga karatAM karatAM ya jhokAM khaIe. eTale A jenI joDe besIene tevuM phaLa maLe. UMghatA joDe beso to UMghatuM ne jAgatA joDe bese to jAgRtinuM phaLa maLe. dhaMdhA upara jAya to pachI e loko joDe ja besavuM paDene ? praznakartA : besavuM paDe. eTale emAM ajAgRti thAyane? dAdAzrI : hA, thAyane ! svAbhAvika thAya. eTale tene te vakhate jANyA karene te ya eka jAgRti che. ajAgRti utpanna thaI che AnAthI, evuM jANyA kare te ya eka jAgRti che. praznakartA : dAdAjI, A jAgRtine aTakAvanArA kAraNo pAchaLanAM che ke atyAranAM paNa koIka che ? dAdAzrI : e barobara che. tethI ApaNe kahIe chIe ne, vyavasthita che. evA saMjoga bhegA thavA joIe. praznakartA : paNa e nizcaya che mATe AgaLa bheguM thaze jarUra ? A nizcaya che eTale vyavasthita badalAze ? dAdAzrI : e to badalAya ne ! vyavasthita badalAyA ja kare. nizcaya ApaNo jevo hoya ne, te bAju ja vyavasthita jAya. ApaNo nizcaya hoyane je dizAmAM, te dizAmAM ja vyavasthitane javuM paDe. vyavasthitano niyama evo che ke tAro nizcaya kaI bAju che ?

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AtmajAgRti 15 praznakartA : paNa pelA AgaLanA nizcaya pachI to na naDe ne ? dAdAzrI : AgaLanuM to ahIM levAdevA nathI. Aje zuM nizcaya che ! paNa e virodhAbhAsa nA hovo joIe e nizcaya. praznakartA : paNa prakRti AgaLa badhA lAcAra hoya che. dAdAzrI : Ama asAmAnya puruSo ja phakta prakRti AgaLa lAcAra nA thAya. bAkI badhA ya prakRti AgaLa lAcAra. jAgRti rojIMdA jIvanamAM ! praznakartA : have rojIMdA jIvanamAM jAgRti kema Ave ? dAdAzrI : vyavahAramAM kliyara(cokhkho) rahe, to jAgRti Ave. vyavahAramAM loko AMgaLI kare e vyavahAramAM jAgRti nA Ave. tame vepArI ho ane pachI eka dahADo traNa vAge dukAna ughADo. eka dahADo pAMca vAge ughADo to tamArAmAM jAgRti Ave nahIM ane tamAro vyavahAra bagaDyo kahevAya. vyavahAramAM AMgaLI karanAra nA joIe. tArI pAchaLa AMgaLI kare che loko ? praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : mATe e vyavahAramAM tuM vyavahArika thaI jA. koI AMgaLI nA kare, to jAgRti sArI Avaze. praznakartA : nA. paNa jJAtA-draSTA thayA to ya vyavahAra to rAkhavo joIene ? dAdAzrI : vyavahAra thAya. te enI meLe thaye ja jAya. jJAtA-draSTAmAM to vyavahAra rahe ja. jJAtA-draSTA thAya eTale, nizcaya nizcayamAM thaI gayo to vyavahAra vyavahAramAM thaI jAya. paNa ekaMdare dhyAna hoya ja e to. kAraNa ke e dhyAna AtmAne rAkhavuM nathI paDatuM, e cittanuM hoya che. praznakartA: paNa dAdA, AvuM kema thatuM haze ke koIvAra jAgRti rahyA kare ane pachI bIje vyavahAranuM karavAnuM hoya emAM gullA vAgyA kare. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : paNa e ya vyavahAranuM tyAMya regyulara thavuM joIe ne ? praznakartA : paNa evuM tUTatuM kema haze ? dAdAzrI : e to ApaNe goThavIe to jAgRti rahe ja. ApaNe caMdubhAIne kahIe ke bhaI, vyavahAra bagADavo nA joIe, cokhkho rahevo joIe. vyavahAramAM kazuM bUma nA AvavI joIe. kacaro baLe te vadhu jAgRti ! praznakartA : pachI e jAgRtine vadhAravA mATe kazuM karavuM paDatuM nathI ? dAdAzrI : kazuM karavuM na paDe ane jema jema phAIlo ochI thatI jAya tema jAgRti vadhatI jAya. tamAre jAgRti vadhatI javAnI. kAraNa ke jUno kacaro nIkaLavAno che ne eTale. bAkI Amane to enI meLe ja, te ja dahADe jAgRti thaI gaIne ! pachI emane jAgRti rahe, niraMtara. tamAre to pelo kacaro bALyA pachI jAgRti vadhe. praznakartA : e kArya-kAraNa saMbaMdha che ne ? dAdAzrI : hA, te saMbaMdha kharo ne ! e kacaro badho bALI nAkhavo paDaze ne ? pachI tamane koI jAtano nukasAna nahIM kare kacaro. kacaro rahyo ja nahIM pachI. kharI lAIpha ja jIvavAnuM tyAre kharuM lAgene ? A to lAIpha badhI bagaDI jAya ! praznakartA : zuddhAtmA thayA pachI, A pulanI pariNatImAM je pheraphAra thAya che, te zAthI dekhAya che ? dAdAzrI : e jAgRti vadhyAthI. praznakartA : e jAgRti vadhI konI ? AtmAnI vadhIne ? dAdAzrI : e AtmAnI nahIM. je UMghe che, jene brAMti che tenI vadhI che.

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AtmajAgRti AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jJAnItuM sAnidhya khIlave jAgRti ! ApaNe ahIM che te loko ghoMghATa karatA hoya to ahIM vAta nA saMbhaLAyane ApaNane ? enA jevuM che A. mahIM karmano udaya Avyo, te ghaDIe badhuM mahIM Ama gUMgaLAmaNa thAya. eno vAMdho nahIM, e nukasAnakartA nathI. te ghaDIe kaMI jAgRti gaI nathI. jAgRti ja hoya che. A jAgRti pUrepUrI rahetI nathI, jhokuM khaI jAya. meM kahyuM, A jAgRti che paNa khIlI nathI. eTalA mATe ame bola bola karIe to khIle. A sAIDanI khIle, pelI sAIDanI khIle. A kornaranI khIle, pelA kornaranI khIle. eTale badhI jAgRti khIle. eTalA mATe bolIe, karavAnuM nathI kahetA. praznakartA : jAgRtino je krama hoya e pramANe ja jAgRti rahe, e jAgRtine vadhAravAno koI rasto kharo ? dAdAzrI : hA. amArI pAse besa-besa kare to A jAgRti vadhe. eTalA sAru roja Ava Ava kare che ne loko ! nahIM to eka ja dahADo nA karI dauM ? sArA kALamAM to eka ja vakhata karavAnuM hoya. A to keTalA badhA devALAvALA ! hA, bhayaMkara devALAvALA. nAdAra sITanI upara beThelA. te roja roja vidhio karuM to ya devuM patatuM nathI. paNa chatAM ya Ama karatAM karatAM patI jaze. hAjara thayuM te ja jJAta ! praznakartA: Ama satata jAgRti nA rahe paNa TANuM Ave tyAre jJAna hAjara thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : hAjara thaI jAya che. je haMmezAM hAjara thAya, enuM nAma ja jJAna kahevAya. hAjara nA thAya e jJAna ja kema kahevAya ? praznakartA : tame amane AtmA ne badhuM chUTuM karI Apo cho, pachI amAre AtmAmAM ja rahevuM joIene ? pachI badhuM milcara kema thaI jAya che ? dAdAzrI : evuM che ne, A upAdhine 'jovAnI' che, temAM upAdhimAM tuM hAtha ghAluM to dajhAya. ApaNe hoLI jovAthI kaMI ApaNI AMkha dajhAya nahIM. paNa ApaNe mahIM A peluM nALiyera kADhavA hAtha ghAlIe to dajhAIe. eTale tuM nALiyera kADhavA hAtha ghAlato'to, tenuM A thaI gayuM. eTale meM kahyuM ke, have AvatI phere jJAna ApuM tyAre DahApaNathI sAcavI rAkhaje. praznakartA : paNa ApaNe chUTA paDI gayA pachI nALiyera levA jaIe chIe, e nA thavuM joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : hA. A jatAM rahIe chIe eTale haju tamArI jAgRti che, te jAgRtine haDaselo mArIne tame pelAmAM ghUso cho. kAraNa ke karmanA udaya bhAre che. eTale eka mANasa kyAM sudhI jIravI zake A. AMgaLI para che te naLanuM pANI paDatuM hoya to kyAM sudhI Ama AMgaLI rAkhI zake ? tyAre kahe, aDadho iMca, poNo iMca hoya paNa be icano phorsa paDe to khasI jAya AMgaLI. te A karmanA udaya evA bhAre ne to jAgRti khasI jAya. kolejamAM DIgrI levA jatAM keTalAM varSo gayelAM ? praznakartA : che. dAdAzrI : eTalAM varasonI bhAre jarUra nathI. huM to kahuM chuM cha ja mahinA tame mArI joDe rahone, bahu thaI gayuM ! badhuM AkhA anaMta avatAranI khoTa vaLI jAya. jAgRti janme kaDavAzamAMthI... A Amane to rAta-dahADo koIne kazuM duHkha nA thAya ne koIne kazuM e nA thAya, emAM ja badhuM citta rahe. jene Akho dahADo sevAparopakAramAM citta rahetuM hoya, tene ThaMDaka rahe. eTale ene A jJAnanI jAgRti ochI rahe. enAM karatAM luccA mANasane che ne, tene A jAgRti bahu vadhI jAya. kAraNa ke ene baLatarA pelI bahu hoyane, te ThaMDaka bahu thAya, eTale zraddhA jabarajasta coMTI jAya. pachI e pramANe badhuM jabarajasta kare. AvuM kekyulezana che badhuM !

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AtmajAgRti AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) sAruM karavAvALAne ThaMDaka rahe. A jJAna ApIene ame, e je ThaMDaka thAya ne, pelAne je kharAbavALAne ThaMDaka thAya te ora prakAranI thAya, bahu UMcA prakAranI. enI jAgRti te dahADe ja jAmI jAya. AmanI maMda jAgRti rahe ! A emane ko'ka harAvanAra maLe, 'tamArAmAM akkala nathI", Amatema be-cAra zabda bolene eTale tarata 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM" e jAgRta thaI jAya. badhA loko 'Avo, Avo, Avo' kahe eTale pachI jAgRti nA Ave. kaDavAza dahADAmAM be-cAra vakhata Ave to jAgRti rahe. eka nAnAmAM nAnI bAbata, TADhA pANImAM boLyuM kapaDuM ane sanalAITa(sAbu) ghAle, ane garama pANImAM boLelAM kapaDAmAM sanalAITa(sAbu) ghAlo to A beumAM phera paDI jAya che, to AmAM to keTalo badho phera paDI jAya ! jAgRti ane puNya ! praznakartA : jAgRti e puNyanA AdhAre che ? athavA jAgRti ane puNyane saMbaMdha kharo ? dAdAzrI : puNya to jemAM ne temAM hoya ja. saMjoga bAjhavAmAM purve to hoya ja. paNa ApaNe nizcaya hovo joIe ke mAre jAgRti rAkhavI ja che ke puruSArtha karavo ja che. praznakartA : anukULamAM TATuM paDI jAya ane pratikULatAmAM vadhAre jAgRti rahe evuM kema ? dAdAzrI : anukULamAM to evuM che ne, ene mIThuM lAge ne ! ThaMDo pavana Avato hoya to kalAka jato rahe ne bahu garamI hoya to kalAka kADhavo hoya to keTalo bhAre lAge ! ane A to kalAka kADhavo sahejamAM nIkaLI jAya. tema jamavAnuM sAruM hoya toya jhapATAbaMdha jamAI jAya ane bhUkha lAgI hoya ne jamavAnuM badhuM evuM hoya to pachI nA chUTake khAvuM paDe. praznakartA : paNa jAgRti pratikULatAmAM kema vadhAre rahe che ? dAdAzrI : pratikULatA e AtmAnuM viTAmIna che ane anukULatA dehanuM viTAmIna che. anukULa saMyogothI deha sAro thAya. pratikULa saMjogomAM AtmA sAro thAya. e badhA saMyogo phAyadAkAraka che. samajavuM hoya to badhA saMyogo phAyadAkAraka che. anukULa ne pratikULa badhuM bAhya bhAganuM ja che, bahAra no bhAga che ne te ja varte che, AtmA vartato nathI. pratikULa hoya tyAre bAhya bhAga ebsaTa thAya, tyAre AtmA hAjara thAya. anukULatAmAM bAhya bhAga prejhanTa hoya ja. eTale ApaNe AtmA prejhanTa karavo hoya tene pratikULatA sArI ane deha prejhanTa karavo hoya to anukULatA sArI. ApaNe jo AtmA thavuM hoya to pratikULatA lAbhadAyI che ne AtmA nA thavuM hoya to anukULatA lAbhadAyI che. jAgRtinA mArga upara cAlyA eTale pratikULatA phAyadAkAraka ane bebhAnatAnA mArga para e anukULatA phAyadAkAraka. praznakartA : anukULatAmAM paNa jAgRtimAM rahe to vadhAre phAyado ne ? dAdAzrI : pUrI nA rahI zake. eTale ame pratikULa karIe ulaTuM, nA hoya to. praznakartA : anukULa ne pratikULa e to mAnavA upara che ne ? ke svabhAvika hoya che Ama ? dAdAzrI : che ekkekTa, paNa mana che tyAM sudhI hoya ja ne ! jyAM sudhI manano AdhAra che tyAM sudhI hoya ja. praznakartA : A deha che ene ya pratikULa-anukULa lAge ja ne badhuM ? dAdAzrI : kharI rIte dehane lAgatuM nathI. mananuM che. praznakartA : garamI lAge ne ekadama akaLAmaNa thaI jatI hoya, to A garamI dehane lAge che ke manane lAge che ? dAdAzrI : mananuM. dehane kazuM lAge nahIM. buddhi kahe eTale mana cAlu thaI jAya, buddhi nA kahe to vAMdho nahIM. buddhi eTale saMsAra jAgRti.

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AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) AtmajAgRti praznakartA : pratikULatA e anukULatA ja che. evI paNa aMdara UMdhI goThavaNI karI zake che ne, buddhithI ? dAdAzrI : hA. paNa jene mokSe javuM hoya e goThavaNI kare ke A to anukULa ja che. kharo lAbha AmAM che pratikULatAmAM. ame TADhamAM ya oDheluM kADhI nAkhIe. eTale jAgRti rahe. praznakartA : e vakhate kevI jAgRtimAM raho ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti jAgRtimAM rahI, nahIM to jAgRti UMdhe che. praznakartA: A ThaMDI lAgavAthI UMgha Ave nahIM. eTale pachI je jAgI gayA, pachI jAgRtimAM rahevAnuM evI rIte ? dAdAzrI : nahIM to UMgha AvI jAya. ane te ghaDIe koI jagADanAra hoya nahIM ne ! praznakartA : e aMdara zuM jAgRtimAM rahyA ? dAdAzrI : bebhAnapaNuM ochuM thaI jAyane ! jAge eTale tuM je kazuM jANato hoya ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM ja hoya ne ! vicAra AvatAM pahelAM ja jAgRti ! praznakartA : dAdAe to kahyuM che ne, rAtre 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' bolatAM ane nididhyAsana karatAM karatAM sUI javuM to AkhI rAta pelo naLa cAlu rahe, to e kaI jAgRti ? dAdAzrI : e khyAla kahevAya. khyAlamAM rahe to ya sAruM. praznakartA : ethI AgaLanI sTeja eTale Apa kaho cho e jAgRtine ? dAdAzrI : dIvo olavAya nahIM. pharI saLagAvavo nA paDe. mana zuM batAve che, enA jJAtA-draSTA rahevAya tyAM sudhI jAgRti laI javAnI che. pachI ene laI javI nahIM paDe ! eTale jAgRti kone kahevAya ? vicAra AvatAM pahelA ja samajAya ke A to ya che ne huM jJAtA chuM. praznakartA : jovuM-jANavuM ane jAgRti vacce zo pharaka ? dAdAzrI : jovuM-jANavuM ane jAgRti be judI vastu che. jovuM-jANavuM e to karekTanesa che ane jAgRti to vadha-ghaTa thAya. AvaraNanA AdhIna che. hamaNe jo kadI dUdhapAka khAdho hoya to jAgRti phUla thaI jAya ane bhUkhyA rahyA hoya to jAgRti vadhI jAya. dUdhapAka khaI jojone eka dahADo, jAgRti keTalI rahe che khabara paDaze, dUdhapAkathI ? jhokuM khAdhuM e khoTa ! praznakartA : dAdAne maLyA pachI, jJAna maLyA pachI ajAgrata rahIe to jokhamadArI keTalI ? dAdAzrI : e jeTalA jhokAM Ave che eTalI. ane jhokAM nA Ave to teTalI. joyA vagara gayuM, enI jokhamadArI rahe. e pharI jovuM paDaze. jozo eTale sApha thaI jAya. dareka udayane jovAthI sApha thAya. ane udayamAM tanmayAkAra rahyA to te karma cokhkhA thavAnA bAkI rahyA. ane AtmA chUTo rahyA pachI AtmAnI jAgRtimAM rahyo eTale koI hisAba baMdhAto ja nathI. jAgRti maMda thAya eTalo vakhata ene peluM coMTe. praznakartA : zuM coMTe ? dAdAzrI : coMTe eTale je hisAba ene cokhkho karavAno chene, eTalo cokhkho nA karyo eTale e evo ne evo pachI paDI rahyo chene ! praznakartA : peluM cokhkhuM nA thAya, paNa navuM bagaDe nahIM ? dAdAzrI : navA sAthe levAdevA ja nathIne ! praznakartA: Ane ja zuddha karIne mokalavAnAne ! dAdAzrI : e zuddha karIne mokalavAnA che, paNa te nA molAyA, eTalA rahyA potAnI pAse sillakamAM.

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[1.2] judApaNAnI jAgRti Adhi-vyAdhi-upAdhimAM ya samAdhi dAdAzrI : 'caMdubhAI' to tamArA pADozI ne ke 'tame pote ja ? praznakartA : deha-mana badhuM pADozI naMbara eka. dAdAzrI : pharsTa nebara2, najIkanA nebarara, 'caMdubhAI" AiskrIma khAya to 'ApaNane' khabara paDI jAya ke AiskrIma khAvA mAMDyAM ? praznakartA: 'caMdubhAI'ne mAra paDe to ya 'potAne khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : khabara paDe, hA ! A saMsAramAM ciMtAmukta thavAnuM che ane te Adhi-vyAdhi-upAdhi hoya chatAM, upAdhimukta thavAnuM che. evuM thoDuM ghaNuM thayuM ke nahIM thayuM ? praznakartA : dAdA, evuM thaI gayuM ke lokone upAdhi dekhAya ane mane upAdhi nA lAge. dAdAzrI : niraMtara ciMtA nahIM, upAdhi nahIM, to jJAnI ja thaI gayA ne ! 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e bhUtanuM vaLagaNa hatuM. te vaLagaNa badhAM, mAre ya e khAya che ne mAle ya e khAya che. pachI have A jJAna maLyA pachI, soLAM rahI gayA, soLa sahana ApaNe karavAM paDe. peluM bhUtaDuM nIkaLI gayuM. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) paNa have soLAM mahIM lhAya baLe. davA copaDavI paDe ApaNe ! eTale enI bahu hAyavoya nA karavI. caMdubhAI cA pIe che cAra kapa, pIe to joyA karavuM. caMdubhAIne ane tamane levAdevA nathI. ApaNe jAtane oLakhIe ke nahIM ? A caMdubhAI zuM karI rahyA che, ene 'jANavuM joIe. caMdubhAI jaja tarIke jajamenTa ApatA hoya, to paNa ene ApaNe 'jANavuM' joIe ke A zuM karI rahyA che jaja. e ApaNe 'jANIe', e ApaNuM jJAna ane jaja zuM karI rahyA che e emanuM. sahu sahunI, banne potapotAnI che te pharajo bajAve che. AtmA AtmAnI pharaja bajAve ane sAheba sAhebanI pharaja bajAve. tame sAhebane oLakho ke nA oLakho ? sArA mANasa che ne ke thoDA kharAbe ya che ? praznakartA : thoDA kharAba che. dAdAzrI : jo oLakhe ne ! hA, 'huM ja sAheba chuM' hoya to AvuM niSpakSapAtI koNa bole ? koI kaheze, 'tame akkala vagaranA cho', to kahIe ke 'bhaI, tame to Aje ja jANyuM ke amArAmAM akkala nathI, paNa ame to pahelethI ja jANIe chIe." evuM 'tamAre' kahevuM. tame to Aje jANyuM. paNa huM caMdubhAIne AkhI jiMdagIthI oLakhuM chuM. 'tame" caMdubhAIne oLakho ke nA oLakho ? praznakartA : sArI rIte oLakhuM. dAdAzrI : sArI rIte oLakho ne, ke kyAM vAMko che, kyAM cUko che, kyAM sIdho che, badhuM ja jANone ? pachI koI vAMko kahe, temAM ApaNane zuM vAMdho che ? ane ApaNuM to koI laI janAra nathI. laI jaze to thoDuMghaNuM che te ya 'caMdubhAInuM laI jaze. tamAruM koI laI janAra nathI. e 'tamane' oLakhatA ja nathI ne koI ! tamane oLakhe koNa ? ApaNA A mahAtmAo oLakhe !

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judApaNAnI jAgRti DiphekTane jANatAro AtmA ! praznakartA : dAdA, mAre moTI DiphekTa e ja che ke... 25 dAdAzrI : DiphekTa che paNa jANo chone to tame AtmA cho. tamAre kyAM DiphekTa che ? DiphekTa to A pudgala AvuM che, baMdha Avo baMdhAyelo che. temAM ApaNane zuM nukasAna che ! dAdA mAthe che ne pudgala rAzi hoya to dAdA calAvI le, paNa ApaNe zA mATe mAthe laIe ? tame caMdubhAI hatA, tyAM sudhI to mAthe levuM paDe. have caMdubhAI nathI to caMdubhAIno bhAra ApaNe zuM levAno ? pADozIne to rItasara hoya. e raDe to ApaNe raDavA lAgavuM ? A caMdubhAI AvA che evuM jANIe, enuM nAma ja jJAna ! tuM AtmA che ne A pudgala che mUA. tAro bhaDakATa thayo ke caDhI bese. AkhuM varlDa AghuMpAchuM thAya. A dehane tAva Ave ke pakSAghAta thAya ke saLage paNa bhaDake e bIjA, kahIe. pudgala kI khoTa he, apane ko khoTa kabhI nahIM hotI. khoTa jaze to pudgalane ghera. ApaNe ghera koI dahADo khoTa jatI nathI. beuno vyavahAra judo, vepAra judo. zeTha ane dukAna judAM hoya ke eka hoya ? praznakartA : judA judA. dAdAzrI : tyAre dukAna saLage che tyAre jANe ke huM saLagyo. alyA, tuM kyAM saLage che ? dukAna saLage che. heMDa, ApaNe cA pIe. tyAre huM saLagyo, huM saLagyo, pArakI vastu mAthe laIne phare. praznakartA : AvAM banAva kaMIka bane tyAre ArtadhyAna-raudradhyAna thAya che to kharuM ja. pachI pratikramaNe ya karuM. dAdAzrI : e ArtadhyAna-raudradhyAna ene nA kahevAya. e ArtadhyAna-raudradhyAna tamAre nathI thatuM. tame to AtmA cho. e to caMdubhAIne thAya che. te emAM caMdubhAIne ApaNe vadhuM paDatuM hoya tyAre kahevuM, 'bhaI, Ama jarA AstethI kAma lo.' ane vAta kare tyAre A phAIla naMbara vana tArI, te sAmI vyakti joDe vAta kare. tene tuM ya 'jANuM' AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ane e ya 'jANe', zuM vAtacIta thaI te. ApaNe jJAtA-draSTA-paramAnaMdI. ApaNo svabhAva ApaNAmAM. 26 caMdulAlane DahApaNa AvyuM hoya to DahApaNane juo, 'ohoho ! bahu DAhyA che.' gAMDapaNa Ave to gAMDapaNane juo. cakaDoLe caDeluM hoya to cakaDoLe caDeluM juo. e sivAya bIjuM zuM thavAnuM che ? tame koI dahADo imozanala nAnapaNamAM thayelA ? praznakartA : thayelA. haju paNa thavAya che. paNa jJAna lIdhA pachI ochuM thaI gayuM. dAdAzrI : hA. paNa jJAna lIdhA pachI tamAre mAthe javAbadArI nathI ne ! e to pachI caMdubhAInI javAbadArIne ? to tame judA, caMdubhAI judA. caMdubhAI Imozanala thAya, paNa tame to thatAM nathI ne ? praznakartA H nahIM. koI vakhata pAchuM bheguM thaI jAya che ne koI vakhata juduM thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : bheguM thaI jAya che e vAta judI che. paNa e to juduM thayeluM che. te eka dahADo kharekhara judA raheze pachI. atyAre bIjI rUmo barAbara khAlI thaI nathI ne ! eTale hamaNAM bheguM thavuM paDe. bIjI rUmo jema jema khAlI thaze tema juduM thaI jaze, judA thayA mATe. pudgala bhaya e paulika bhUtAM che. tenAMthI ApaNe DaravAnuM nA hoya. A paudgalika bhUtAM kahyAM. 'ApaNe' 'caMdubhAI'ne kahIe, 'Ama NikanI peTha karo, e nA cAle. kSatriya thAva. bIjA du:kho hajI AvavAM hoya to Avo. paga phATo, mAthuM du:kho' kahIe. e pudgala che, ApaNe AtmA judA ! cetatapakSI pudgalane zuM duHkha ? hamaNe jelamAM laI javA Ave ke caMdubhAI koNa che ? cAlo. to tame zuM kaho ?

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judApaNAnI jAgRti 28 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA: hA, dAdA, caMdubhAIne mATe kahevAnuM. ane tabiyata sArI che evuM pojhITIva bolavAnuM ApaNe. dAdAzrI : eTale tabiyata sArI che evuM kaho. caMdubhAI kahe ke 'mArI tabiyata kharAba che'. tyAre ApaNe kahIe, 'nA, sArI che.' emAM bIjuM kaMI lAMbuM hoya nahIM, paNa zAMti rahe ene ! bAkI tame pote ja kaho ke, mArI tabiyata sArI che, to sArI thaI jAya. tame pote ja kaho ke mArI tabiyata kharAba che, to kharAba thaI jAya. eTale jevuM ciMtave evo e thaI jAya ! huM judo ne caMdubhAI judA. pote ekarUpa thavuM ja nahIM koI dahADo. caMdubhAIne bhUkha lAgI che, caMdubhAIne khAvuM che, caMdubhAIe khAvAnuM banAvyuM, caMdubhAIne samajaNa paDatI nathI, caMdubhAIne samajaNa paDe che ! AvI badhI bhASA rAkho. praznakartA : jaIe. caMdubhAI jAya enI joDe jaIe. dAdAzrI : hA. ApaNe kahIe ke "A rahyA caMdubhAI, laI jAo. amAre ghera bAraNAM amAre jAte vAsavA paDatAM hatAM. tamAre tyAM polIsavALo bAraNAM vAsI Ape to e zuM khoTuM ?' eTale vaibhava che badho. jelamAM vaibhava nahIM hoya ? A ghera atyAre oraDImAM cAra jaNane paDI rahevuM, enAM karatAM tyAMno vaibhava sAro che !! bAkI AtmAne koI jagyAe duHkha hoya nahIM. ane je pudgala AtmAdhIna thayeluM che, tene to kazuM duHkha ja nA hoyane pachI ? cetana pakSanuM pudgala thayuM pachI zuM du:kha ? cetanapakSanI virodhI pudgala che tyAM sudhI jarA aDacaNa kare. gharaDo koNa ? praznakartA : dAdA ekadama yaMga dekhAya che Aje. dAdAzrI : nA paNa e roja badhA kahe che. pachI huMya arIsAmAM jouM, dekhAya A kevA ? maneya yaMga dekhAya che. badhAM kahe eTale pachI asara thAyane mahIM. bAkI 'huM paiDA chuM' evuM koI dahADo boluM nahIM. kAraNa huM to zuddhAtmA chuM, paiDA to A ja thAya, deha thAya. e bole nahIM. amArA pUchyA sivAya zI rIte bole ? vyavahAramAM kahe ke "bhaI, A paiDA chIe." paNa 'huM paiDo chuM" evuM nA bolAya. kAraNa ke 'huM to zuddhAtmA chuM' eTale amArA hisAba badhA judI jAtanA hoya. 'huM zuddhAtmA' thaIne 'huM paiDo chuM' kharekhara bolyA, to tame tevA thaI jazo. eTale tame kaho ke huM paiDo thayo, e tame tamAre mATe nathI bolatA, paNa aMdarakhAne jANatA hoya ke huM judo ne A to caMdubhAInA mATe bolAya che. eTale tamane asara nA thAya. badhuM iphekTiva che. A varlDamAM eka zabda bolyA ke iphekTiva che badhuM ! 'caMdubhAI kahe ke mArI tabiyata bagaDI che. to "ApaNe" aMdarakhAne samajavuM ke e caMdubhAInI tabiyata bagaDI che, paNa mArI to nahIM ja ne ! sthiti mahAtmAnI pakSAghAtamAM ! jJAna nA hoya evAne pakSAghAta thayo hoya to A zarIra badhuM e thaI jAya. e bahAranA loka jovA Ave ne kaheze, "arere ! A aMga jatuM rahyuM ?" tyAre pelo pakSAghAtavALo AMkhamAMthI pANI kADhyA kare ane kahe ke, 'A ya gayuM ne te ya gayuM. mahAna vedanA thAya. have e ApaNA jJAnavALAne ko'ka vakhata pakSAghAta thayo hoya tyAre khabara kADhanArAone zuM kahe ? 'bhaI, A badhuM DAbuM jatuM rahyuM. paNa tame jene jovA Avo cho tene 'huM ya "jouM" chuM'. huM ya jouM chuM ane tame ya juo. A ApaNe badhA "jonAra' chIe ke kone A thayuM che ? A jJAna ahIM phaLa Ape. bahu sarasa phaLa Ape.. chatAMya ApaNA mahAtmAone bahu AgaLa vadhelA hoya to ya koIne pUchIe, ke 'bhAI, pakSAghAta tamane game ?" tyAre kahe, 'nA, game to nahIM.' paNa AvI paDe to eno tiraskAre ya nA kare. paNa nA hoya to pakSAghAtane bolAve nahIM e. ApaNe kahIe nA Avo to sAruM ke A pIDA koNa UbhI kare ?

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30 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) judApaNAnI jAgRti mutImate na aDe khoTa-tapho ! tame che te roja zerabajAranuM kAma karatA hoya. tamAro mahetAjI hoMziyAra hoya, te mahetAjIne tame eka dA'Do kaho ke bhaI, Aja be dA'DA laganamAM javAnuM che, te zerabajAranuM tuM kAmakAja karaje. have e kAmakAja kare, khoTa jAya to ya ene ema manamAM nA thAya ke A khoTa mane gaI. e jANe ke A nA thayuM hota to sAruM. A zeThane khoTa jaze. paNa mane thayuM evuM to ene lAge ja nahIM ne ! lAge kharuM ene ? e napho thayo hoya toya ? praznakartA H to paNa kaMI nahIM. dAdAzrI : haM... evI rIte ApaNe A caMdubhAIne kahI dIdhuM ne eTale pachI dAdAnuM nAma daIne kahe ke bhaI, A pramANe eTale pachI levAdevA nathI. amArA kahyA zabdo pALe to agharuM che kazuM ya ? A kahe eTalo zabda ApaNe tarata amalamAM mUkI daIe ke cAlyuM gADuM. sephasAIDa batAvI de. jJAtI e ja mAro AtmA ! dAdA keTalo vakhata yAda Ave ? praznakartA : roja dAdAzrI : bhagavAne kahyuM che ke jJAnI puruSa e ja potAno AtmA che. ane A dAdA yAda rahe ne e ja AtmA. nahIM to yAda rahe zI rIte ?! jJAnI puruSa e tamAro AtmA che. mATe tamAro AtmA jyAM sudhI tamane pratyakSa anubhava nA thAya. tyAM sudhI jJAnI puruSanA kahyA pramANe cAlo. A to tamane pratyakSa anubhava thAya che. AtmAno pratyakSa anubhava ke rAta-dahADo tamane cetave che. nathI cetavato ? have 'caMdubhAI' gusse thayA kare paNa akaLAyA hoya to mahIM 'tame" nA pADo. 'nahIM, A na thavuM joIe.' e A zuM che ? A be koNa ? pahelAM be hatA nahIM. e AtmA hAjara che niraMtara. akrama vijJAnano AtmA eka lAkha avatAre ya Avo AtmA pragaTa na thAya ane pragaTa thAya to ciMtA na thAya. praznakartA: paNa jyAre phAIlo Ave ne, tyAre samabhAve nikAla vakhate lAge ke A judo che ne huM judo chuM ema. A pudgalane thaI rahyuM che. dAdAzrI : e to bhAna ja rahe ApaNane ! judo ja che. judo ja thayelo che. judA thayA pachI dAdA yAda rahe, nahIM to yAda nA rahe ane pAMca AjJA paLAya nahIM. chUTApaNAno anubhava thAya che ne ? 'huM chUTo chuM' evo anubhava thAya che, to pachI zuM ? tamane chUTApaNAno anubhava thAya ane kramikamArganA jJAnIone 'huM chUTo chuM evuM mane bhAse che" evuM bole tyAM sudhI e ya pahoMce che. ta karAya rakSaNa 'caMdu'tuM ! have zuM prazna che ? zuM kahevA mAge che tuM ? praznakartA : dAdA, meM prazna nahoto pUkyo, A bene pUkyo hato. dAdAzrI : e game teNe pUkyo hoya. paNa tAro prazna che evo ja avAja Avyo. praznakartA : mAro prazna nahoto, dAdA. dAdAzrI : emAM tamane zuM lAge-vaLage che te ? tame zuddhAtmA, tamAre zuM levAdevA ? tame zuddhAtmA thayA to ya caMdubhAIno pakSa lo cho ? praznakartA : nA levAya, dAdA. dAdAzrI : A lIdho ne, A badho ughADo joI gayA badhA. game teno prazna hoya, paNa prazna to tame pUkyo ne ? huM to ema ja jANuM ke tame pULyo che. paNa tame eTale koNe pUkyo ? e caMdubhAIe pUchaDyo ne ? tame zuddhAtmA cho, tamAre zuM levAdevA che ? eTale ApaNe kahIe ke caMdubhAIe prazna pUchyo, paNa caMdubhAIno potAno nathI A. pachI ame pUchIe ke kono tyAre ? tyAre kahe, A benano. ane emano potAnoya nathI A. e ya zuddhAtmA e badhuM lakSamAM rahevuM joIe. A jJAna enuM nAma ke rileTiva ne riyala badhuM lakSamAM nA rahevuM joIe ?

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judApaNAnI jAgRti 31 praznakartA : rahevuM joIe, dAdA. dAdAzrI : hA e hA karo cho, paNa rahetuM nathI ne pachI bUmo pADo. lakSamAM rahevuM joIe ne ? tamAruM nakkI hovuM joIe ke A mAre lakSamAM rAkhavuM che. pachI dAdAnI kRpA utare. tamAruM ja eka vAra nakkI nathI ne ! evo nizcaya nathI ne ! praznakartA : badhA AvaraNo kholI Apo cho Apa to. bAkI A jeTaluM jANyuM hoya ke jeTaluM sAMbhaLyuM hoya, jeTaluM vAMcyuM hoya e sivAya AgaLa navuM UbhuM nA thAya. Apa batADo eTale tarata khabara paDe ke A to vAta hatI paNa A dekhAtI ja nhotI. dAdAzrI : nahIM to e dekhAya nahIM ne ! praznakartA : peluM Ape kahyuM ke e to caMdubhAIno prazna che, tuM to zuddhAtmA ! tAre zuM levAdevA ? eTale Ama banne bAju judApaNuM samajIne... dAdAzrI : e juduM enuM nAma ja jJAna kahevAya. ame je ApeluM che te evuM jJAna ApeluM, paNa A tamane tamArI pelI pahelAMnI Tevo kharIne, te choDe nahIM ne ! pahelAMthI TevAI gayelAM ne ! te Teva bhaNI jatuM rahe. teno ya vAMdho nahIM, prakRti che eTale evuM thaI ja jAya. paNa jAgRtimAM rahevuM joIe ke AvuM na thavuM joIe. ta karAya vaza Indriyone have ! praznakartA : dAdA, paNa zuddhAtmA thayA pachI indriyone vaza karavA mATe zuM karavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : indriyone vaza karavAnI hotI ja nathI. indriyone vaza karanAro enI khurazI parathI uThI gayo, eNe cArja choDI dIdho. pachI kare koNa ? e to enI meLe ja khAlI thavuM hoya tyAre thaze. jyAre khAlI thaze, tyAre enI meLe baMdha thaI jaze. harSa-zoka to thAya, e nokaSAya che paNa tame jANo chone ? 32 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : tame jANo cho ke A caMdulAla hasyA ane caMdulAlane jarAka Diprezana thaI jAya che. tame badhuM jANo cho ne ? tame judA, A judA. tame tanmayAkAra thAva to tamAre mAthe bhogavaTo Ave. game te sthitimAM AtmA, AtmA ja ! praznakartA : vyavahAranI vAta karavI ane AtmAmAM rahevuM e be sAthe kevI rIte banI zake che ? A kapaDAnI badhI vAto karI, te vakhate ApanI jAgRti kevI rItanA hatI ? dAdAzrI : e svAbhAvika rahe amane to. praznakartA : e amAre kevI rIte zIkhavI e vastu ? dAdAzrI : 'huM bolato nathI' evuM bhAna rahe eTale pachI svAbhAvika rahe. 'huM kartA nathI' evuM bhAna rahe eTale pachI e ja AvI gayuM ne ! svAdiSTa lAge eTale tuM kaMI khaI jato haze emAM ? AtmA khaI jato haze ? praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : khAnAro ja khAya. jonAro joyA kare. tamane ApaNA vijJAnamAM harakata Ave che koI jAtanI ? khAnAro ja khAya che ne ? tame koI dahADo khaI jatA nathI ne ? praznakartA : samajaNa to e ja pramANe che paNa rahI zakAtuM nathI ! dAdAzrI : mAlapuDA tame khaI gayA hatA ? dUdhapAka ? praznakartA : kharekhara huM nahato khaI gayo. khAdhuM badhuM caMdubhAIe ! khAtI vakhate yAda nahotuM rahyuM. dAdAzrI : yAda nahotuM rahyuM, paNa ethI karIne ocho e AtmA khaI gayo ? koI paNa sthitimAM AtmA caMdubhAI thato nathI have. A

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judApaNAnI jAgRti ATaluM tame bagADyuM to ya nathI thaI gayo haju. haju ya tame pheraphAra karo A kahyA pramANe, to kAlathI rAge paDI jAya. kAraNa ke tamAruM rAge paDeluM che, samabhAve nikAla karo cho. vyavasthita samajamAM AvyuM. bhUlacUka thaI hoya to sudharI zake. 33 praznakartA : draSTi maLyA pachI game te vartana thAya, chatAM paNa draSTimAM judApaNAnI jAgRti rahe, to e baMdhana kharuM ? dAdAzrI : vartana konuM che ? draSTi konI che ? 'A to mane coMTyuM, mane coMTyuM' kahe to coMTe. nahIM to mUA, vastu judI thaI gaI. have zuM coMTavAnuM tane ahIM te ?! AtmA nirlepa jANyo, nirlepa anubhavyo pachI ene zuM coMTe te ? ane coMTe ke tarata pachI prajJA tamane cetave ! AjJA pALIe eTale baMdha nA paDe ane baMdha nA paDe eTale AtmA mahIM judo ja thaI gayo che. pote paramAtmA te 'caMdu' pADozI ! praznakartA H potAno je svabhAva che caMdubhAIno, enuM pRthakkaraNa kevI rIte karavuM ? dAdAzrI : caMdubhAIne ane ApaNe zuM levAdevA ? tame zuddhAtmA thayA ne ! caMdubhAI to pADozI che, phAIla naMbara vana. tamAre zuM levA-devA ? eno koI kleima hoya to mane kaho. judA thaI gayA ApaNe. chUTA thaI gayA pachI, be bhAIoe khetarAM vaheMcyA pachI A bIjI bAjunA bhIMDA koI le nahIM, nahIM to le to bhAIo vaDhavaDhA karaze, vaheMcyA pachI. vaheMcyA pahelAM e badhuM le. sahiyAruM hoya tyAM sudhI, vaheMcaNa thayA pahelAM ja bhAMjagaDa che, vaheMcaNa thayA pachI nahIM. praznakartA : vaheMcaNa nA thayuM tyAM sudhI badhuM sahiyAruM samaje ne ! dAdAzrI : sahiyAruM jANIne ja badhuM A karyuM. ane te meM DImArkezana lAIna hau nAkhI ApI che. have kAyamano koyaDo ukalI jAya. paNa to ya kaheze, mane udharasa thaI. alyA, udharasa kone thaI e jANavuM. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : jANo to azAtA vedanIya, zAtA vedanIyamAM pharI jAyane ? dAdAzrI : pharI jAyane tarata. vedanIya guNa che te pADozIno che, ApaNo vedanIya guNa nathI. ApaNe nirlepa chIe. nirlepane kazuM nA thAya. ApaNane udharasa Ave to ema lAgavuM joIe ke, udharasa upaDI che. mane upaDI, evuM nA lAgavuM joIe. joDevALAne udharasa thAya che, te bahu thaI che, evuM lAgavuM joIe. anAdino pelo avaLo abhyAsa eTale pelI Teva paDelI. eTale ApaNe anAdino abhyAsa pheravavo paDe ne ! 34 praznakartA : A to pelI udharasano vAMdho nathI, paNa peluM du:kha thAya che, eno vAMdho che. dAdAzrI : pArakA bhIMDA, pachI eka phero dekhADyA, have judA rAkhavAmAM zuM vAMdho ? mana-vacana-kAyAnA lepAyamAna bhAvo 'mArA che' kahyuM, to kUdAkUda karI mele. paNa 'A mAruM nhoya' ema kahyuM ke pelA baMdha thaI jAya. eka ApaNe jyAM sudhI nakkI nA karIe ke A bhIMDAnI lAIna mArI nhoya, tyAM sudhI ApaNA kheDUto, mANaso badhAM ya bUmAbUma kare. A to amArA anubhavanI vAto kahIe ke je amane anubhava thayelA tenI. eTale ApaNe be-traNa vakhata kahevuM paDe, 'bhaI, A mAruM nhoya have.' eTale e loko bolatA badhA baMdha thaI jAya. evuM karavuM to paDene ? ema ne ema kaMI AvatuM haze ? eka ja lAIna bhIMDAnI hoya temAM to kakaLATa kare, jo bhIMDA laI gayo hoya to kakaLATa kare. ApaNe zAla oDhIne sUtA hoIe ane te dhobI Ave ne kahe ke, 'kAkA, A zAla pAchI Apo, A tamArI hoya.' tyAre ApaNe kahIe, 'tuM jato rahe, bUmAbUma karIza to dhola mArIza.' kAraNa ke potAnA manamAM khAtarI che ke A ja mArI. eTale pelo dhIme rahIne kahe, 'kAkA paNa A bIjI zAla juone ! A tamArI che ne A tamArI nhoya.' 'tuM ahIM AgaLa besIza nahIM, mArIza tane.' sUtA sUtA pAchA kAkA mahIM bole ema. kAraNa ke potAne khAtarI thaI ke A mArI ja zAla che. ane pachI A bahu kahe tyAre kaheze, pAcho navuM zuM lAvyo tophAna ?!' paNa 'e

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judApaNAnI jAgRti 35 ji. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) to ahIM juo to kharA.' 'zAla ughADa, hA, lAva." tyAre pelo nAmano AMkaDo dekhADe ne ! 'hA, alyA, A mArI. tuM tArI zAla pAchI laI jA." tyAre AvuM kare mUo ! paNa tyAM sudhI vaDhavaDhA kare. kare ke nA kare ? ene geDa besI gaI, mArI ja che. ene to e ja hoya paNa kema ? A pelA nAma uparathI khabara paDe. dhobIe ApatI vakhate bhUlene bicAro ! pachI jyAre nAma upara AvyuM tyAre ene khAtarI thaI ke sAluM, A to bhUlyA. enA jevI hoya, pachI zuM thAya ? ApaNe dabAvI pADIe ne ? sUI gayelAM hoya pachI uThIe ke ? AghuMpAchuM thAya koNa ? praznakartA : zuddhAtmA pade beThAM pachI lakSa besI gayuM. pachI jAgRti barobara, Topa upara ja rahevI joIene ! e AghIpAchI kema thAya ? dAdAzrI : e AghIpAchI nathI thatI. AghupAchuM thAya e juduM ne A jAgRti judI. be ya juduM ja cAlene ! che ja juduM juduM. praznakartA : AvuM juduM kyAM sudhI ? cheka sudhI juduM cAlyA kare ? dAdAzrI : A to phAIlo che tyAM sudhI. phAIlo che tyAM sudhI aMtarAtmA. phAIlo pUrI thaI gaI eTale paramAtmA. indrima gavarnamenTa pachI phUla gavarnamenTa. eTale A phAIlo herAna kare che ! praznakartA: hA. chatAM phAIlo hoya badhI. e ApaNA mATe game teTaluM kharAba karatI hoya, enA mATe aMdarathI bhAva evo kharAba thato nathI. paNa jyAre phAIla sAme Ave ke sAmo mANasa nirdoSa dekhAvo joIe, ekadama thavuM joIe, e nathI thatuM. thoDIvAra pachI thAya che. dAdAzrI : jAgRti to hoya che paNa pote kAco paDI jAya che. pahelAMnI Teva kharI ? praznakartA : dAdA, eka phero zuddhAtmAmAM besADyA pachI kAcA zenA paDe pachI ? dAdAzrI : koI gALa bhAMDe to emAM pAcho hAtha ghAlI de. ene ema thAya ke mane gALa bhAMDI. kharI rIte ene gALa bhAMDato nathI. e to enI jagyAe ja che. vaLI pAchA ahIM kyAM AvyA ? akrama vijJAna zuM kahe che ? doSita koI hotAM ja nathI. 'vyavasthita' che te preraNA kare ane preraNAthI badhuM cAle. tene "ApaNe" "joyA' karavAnuM ane basa ATaluM ja, joyA karavAnuM. philma ane philmane jonAro bannene thAka nA lAge. jonArane thAka nA lAge ne, philmane thAka nA lAge. jovAthI kazI asara thatI nathI. jovAthI-jANavAthI koI asara aDe nahIM. praznakartA : have A je phAIla AvI, samabhAve nikAla karyo, e prakRtinI je kaMI gUMco aMdara hatI, je kaMI thayuM e badhuM ApaNe joyA karIe. e joyA karIe ema prakRti badhI cokhkhI thatI jAyane ? dAdAzrI : thAyane badhuM. cokhkhI thatI jAya. jema tame juone tema tamArI jovAnI zakti vadhatI jAya. kAraNa ke zakti malTiplAya thAya ane cokhkhuM thAya. mahIM AnaMda Ubho thAya. A to mAthuM dukhyuM to kaheze, mAre to bahu mAthuM dukhe che. alyA, paNa tAruM dukhe che ke caMdulAlanuM dukhe che ? tuM to zuddhAtmA. to kahe ke, hA, huM to zuddhAtmA. e to caMdulAlanuM dukhe che. have caMdubhAInuM mAthuM dukhe, emAM mane mAthuM dukhyuM kahyuM eTale asara thaI ! vaDhe te hoya "huM" ! praznakartA H ophisamAM huM kAma karuM to tyAM AgaLa mAre koIne vaDhavuM paDe, kaMIka kahevuM paDe, paNa pachI mane bahu duHkha thAya ke AvuM koIne kahevAnuM, mAre nimitta kema banavuM paDyuM ? dAdAzrI : evuM che ne tame vaDhatAM nathI ne ?! caMdubhAI vaDhe che ke tame vaDho cho ? praznakartA: caMdubhAI vaDhe che. dAdAzrI : to javAbadArI tamAre levAnI jarUra nahIM. tamAre to

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judApaNAnI jAgRti AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) caMdubhAIne ema kahevuM ke 'bhaI, bahu vaDho cho to tamArI zI kiMmata raheze ? tamArI AbarU jaze !" praznakartA : ema ghaNI vakhate ApaNe kudaratanI sAme mANasane eTalo badho lAcAra thato joIe chIe, te vakhate kazuM jJAna ke koI vastu kAma nathI lAgatI, to tyAM zuM karavuM ema ? dAdAzrI : e tame zuddhAtmA thayA. zuddhAtmAne lAcArI thAya ja nahIM ne. A to tamAre caMdubhAI na thavuM joIe. tame caMdubhAI thaI jAva, enI javAbadArI Ave. tame nakkI karyuM ke ApaNe koNa chIe kharekhara ? ane caMdubhAI e tamAruM rileTiva svarUpa che. eTale ApaNe to e thavuM ja nahIM. dAdAno tija judApaNAto vyavahAra ! praznakartA : eka mahAtmAe bIjA mahAtmA joDe kevI rIte vartana rAkhavuM ? dAdAzrI : pote AtmAmAM rahIne, dehAdhyAsa utpanna na thavo joIe. praznakartA : eTale badhI vAtano sAra pote AtmAmAM rahevuM niraMtara. dAdAzrI : bIjuM zuM che ? dehamAM to gadheDo ya rahe che ane tame ya raho, to zuM phera paDyo ? praznakartA : kazuM nahIM. nakAmuM gayuM ! praznakartA H dAdA, tame tamArA pADozIne kevI rIte juo-karo cho ? dAdAzrI : sarasa rIte, bahu sArA mANasa che e huM jANuM ne, nAnapaNathI ja ! Ama sArA mANasa che. ghaNA sArA mANasa che. kazI Dakhala nahIM, kazI bhAMjagaDa nahIM, kaMI joIe nahIM, kaMI herAnagati nahIM. vahelA uThADo to ya vAMdho nahIM, moDA uThADo to ya vAMdho nahIM. nIce mahAtmA AvyA che, kahetAMnI sAthe aDadho kalAkamAM uThIne ya AvatA rahe nIce. tane ema lAgyuM amane pajavatA haze ? nA. are, A to pajavatA nathI paNa hIrAbAneya pajavatA nathIne, koI dahADo ya ! praznakartA : je AtmA ne pudgalanuM DimArkezana che ne, Apane jevI rIte chUTo lAge evI rIte amane AtmA chUTo kaI rIte lAge ? dAdAzrI : chUTo ja che ne ! praznakartA che paNa Apa je rIte joI zako cho, AtmA judo ane pudgala juduM evuM ame joI zakIe kharA ? dAdAzrI : e sTezana Ave tyAre jovAya ne ! praznakartA : eTale e kaI rItanuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : kazuM rIta nA hoya. A AtmA ne pudgala. A be aDIne ja che, paNa saMga nathI bane. praznakartA : paNa A je tame beThA cho atyAre ane dAdA bhagavAna 'dAdA'ne jue che, e kaI rIte Ama jue che ? dAdAzrI : sva-para draSTithI. svanI draSTi ne paranI draSTithI. meM je tamane AtmA Apyo enI draSTi judI ane AnI draSTi judI. A je rUma dekhAya che A badhuM e draSTi judI, paranI draSTi kahevAya ane pelI svanI draSTi ane svadraSTi judI hoya. sva ane para beu juduM dekhAya. A para ne A sva, tame hau samajo cho ne, paNa tamAre UMDA utaravAnI jarUra nathI. paNa ApaNane to samajAya ke bhaI, A badhuM juduM. tamane khabara nA paDe ke A para che ? praznakartA : hA, e to khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : e ja draSTi. A hoya ne A huM, A joya ne A huM. eTale A ja majabUta karI do ! A roDa badhA kAcA hoya ke pachI AgaLa roDa karIe ne to pachI peluM kAcuM paDI jAya ane A roDa je majabUta che ne jyAM sudhI dekhAyo tyAM sudhI ene majabUta thaI javA do barAbara. e to niyamathI ja A badhuM kAma kare che. tamAre e badhI bhAMjagaDamAM utaravAnuM nahIM. nahIM to ahIM hato evo DakhalavALo thaI jAya. tyAM

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judApaNAnI jAgRti 40 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) DakhalanI jarUra ja nahIM. ApaNe AjJAmAM raho. AjJAnI bahAra nIkaLIe e bhayaMkara guno kahevAya. A to pahelAnI je Teva paDI gayelI ne, te badhI hebiTa A herAna kare. bAkI, pAMca AjJA ja pALavAnI. bIjI DakhalamAM utaravAnuM ja nahIM. tamane khabara paDe ne ke A para che, A sva joya ? praznakartA : hA dAdA, e to khabara paDI jAya. dAdAzrI : jagatanA loko koI samajI nA zake. gAphela kahevAya kone ? praznakartA : dAdAe bhedajJAna ApyuM, bhinna banAvyA. huM judo, daraasala judo. paNa pelo caMdubhAI to rahene ? e to rahevAno ne, jeTalA hoya eTalA varSa rahevAno ne ! caMdubhAI pudgala to rahevAnuM ne ? dAdAzrI : rahevAnuM ne, e pudgala rahevAnuM. pudgala ApaNe arpaNa karyuM che. have A to pudgala che te vyavasthitane AdhIna che. te tenA vyavasthitane AdhIna pharyA karaze. tamAre joyA karavAnuM. e pudgala zuM kare che e joyA karavAnuM. ATalo puruSArtha ApaNo. praznakartA : joyA karavAnuM ne ko'ka divasa pudgalane cetavavAnuM kharuM ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : hA, cetavavAnuM ! paNa gaphalatamAM Ave to cetavavAnuM. praznakartA : are, hAlatAM ne cAlatAM gaphalata to karato hoya che. dAdAzrI : nA, A badhuM to udayakarma karAve che. paNa ApaNe A ughADI AMkhe cAlo ane sAvadhAnIpUrvaka cAlo, basa eTaluM ja. eno durupayoga nA thavo joIe. nahIMtara pelI jovAnI jAgRti enI maMda thaI jAya. 'jue to to ene kazuM karavAnuM nathI. je AjJAmAM rahe te 'joto' ja hoya caMdubhAIne, to ene kazuM vAta ja karavAnI jarUra nathI. paNa e joto nA hoya tyAM cetavavo paDe. praznakartA : jAgRtinI je vAta karIne, jAgRtimAM rahevAnI ne cetatA rahevAnI. enuM A ApaNe vivaraNa karIe chIe. dAdAzrI : hA, barobara che. jene A jJAtA-draSTA rahI zakAtuM hoya, tene che te A vAtanI jarUra nathI. ane jene jAgRti nA rahetI hoya to ApaNe kahIe ke have UghADI AMkhe cAlajo, gAphela nA thaI jAva. nahIM to vyavasthita to tamane calAvavAnA che paNa gAphelapUrvaka nA hovuM joIe ane jJAtA-draSTA rahe tene gAphela ya nahIM, kazuM rahyuM nahIM. e ApaNA hisAbamAM jAya che. caMdubhAI zuM kare che, enA jJAtA-draSTA tame. praznakartA : eTale dAdA, koI paNa prasaMgamAM caMdubhAIne jovAnA badale huM caMdubhAI ja thaI jauM eTale gAphela thaI gayuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, e gAphela thaI gayuM kahevAya. koI paNa prasaMgamAM Ama caMdubhAIne jovAne badale tame caMdubhAI thaI gayA e gAphela. tyAre ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ke tyAM UghADI AMkhe cAlo. praznakartA: hA, paNa evuM koI vakhata thayA pachI AMkha UghaDI jAya che. dAdA cetavI de che ke A thaI gayuM, have Ane juo. dAdAzrI : hA. eTale tyAM ApaNe kahyuM ke UghADI AMkhe UbhA raho. e ApaNe jAgRti rAkhavAnI. evuM thaI jAya che ne ? dAdAne kahevA AvavuM nathI paDatuM ne ! vijJAna badhuM kAma karI rahyuM che. tamane koI jAtanI upAdhi nathI. sahaja rIte kAma thaI rahyuM che. cetave hau, loka kahe che ke AtmAno anubhava thato nathI. alyA mUA, mahIM cetavatA nathI, Akho dahADo ? hA. tyAre mUA, e ja AtmA, bIjo koNa Ave ? koI paradezI che, te mahIM pesI gayo che ?! have vikAlI raga-dveSa ! praznakartA: ghaNI vakhata potAnI tIvra icchA hoya e jo nA prApta thAya, to pachI enuM magaja che to chaTakI jAya, badhA upara gusse thaI jAya ane jJAnamAM nA rahI zake. to have A badhAno nikAla karI ane pote jJAtA-draSTA kevI rItanA rahI zake ?

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judApaNAnI jAgRti dAdAzrI : e game tevI paristhiti hoya, jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM hoya to rahI zake. jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM hoyane, te amuka hada sudhInI paristhitimAM rahI zakAya ema che. behada thayeluM hoya, dabANa bahu hoya tyAM na rahe. have jAgRti UDI gaI to ya ema rahevuM joIe ke A jAgRti UDI gaI che, tene ya huM jANuM chuM ! paNa jANakAra ja rahevuM joIe. to peluM badhuM dhULadhANI, niHsattva thaI jAya. sattva nIkaLI jAya, baLI jAya badhuM. lokonI sAthenuM DiliMga kevuM hoya che, e kahone mane ! rAga-dveSa thAya che ? bilakuleya nahIM ? 41 praznakartA : nA thAya. eTale bahu cIkaNI phAIlo hoya emAM thaI jAya. paNa loko joDe ghaNA ochAM thaI gayA che. dAdAzrI : ApaNane AtmA prApta thayo eTale rAga-dveSa nA thAya, paNa DiscArja rAga-dveSa thAya, je nikAlI che te. have nikAlI che ene rAgadveSa gaNAtA nathI. rAga-dveSa to je Ama AgaLa bIja rUpe paDene, te cArjane rAga-dveSa kahevAya. peluM khAlI gusso che, ne e pudgalanA guNo che. eTale e kaMI bahu mahattvanI vastu nathI. praznakartA : eTale ANe Ama karyuM, to huM paNa Ama karIza evI jAtano gusso hoya, e cArja thaI jAya ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : caMdubhAI evI jAtano gusso karatA hoya kaMIka, to ya paNa ApaNane na gamatuM hoya to e DiscArja che. ApaNane game nahIM, tamane ruci nathI to tame jokhamadAra nathI. praznakartA : dAdA, ajJAnIne paNa jo ci nA hoya... dAdAzrI : toya e jokhamadAra. kAraNa ke ajJAnI eTale huM ja caMdulAla chuM. ruci nA hoya to ya jokhamadAra. ruci nA hoya to aruci hoya. kaMIka to hoya ene. ane tamane aruci nA hoya, AvuM nA thavuM joIe, evuM hoya ! ajJAnIne ruci nA hoya to aruci hoya ja ! eTale game tyAM ene to lapaTAvAnuM ja che. praznakartA H koIe gALa ApI, pachI ApaNane thAya ke Ane be AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) gALa ApavI che ane pachI ApIe kharI. paNa pachI ApaNe joIe ke A caMdubhAIne A AvuM mana thayuM, pAchI ApI ane te ya pAchAM caMdubhAIne ApaNe joIe, to e zuM kahevAya ? 42 dAdAzrI : A badhuM banI gayuM ene tuM basa 'joyA' kare, to chUTI gayuM. tamAre levAdevA nahIM. tAre javAbadArI nahIM. caMdubhAIne javAbadArI kharI. te caMdubhAIne pelo sAmo mANasa TaiDakAve, 'kevA nAlAyaka cho te ! zuM bola bola karo cho ?' eTale dhola-bola mArIya de. eTale jokhamadArI che enA mAthA para ! pachI ApaNe caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'atikramaNa kema karyuM, mATe pratikramaNa karo.' praznakartA : paNa dhAro ke caMdubhAIe pratikramaNa nA karyuM, to e cArja thayuM ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, to ya cArja nathI thatuM. cArja to thAya ja nahIM. praznakartA : paNa pratikramaNa karavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : kare to cokhkhI thaI gaI badhI phAIla. jJAne karIne cokhkhI karIne mUkI dIdhI. jeTalAM kapaDAM dhoIene eTalAM cokhkhAM karIne mUkI devAnAM. pachI istrImAM jAya. praznakartA : koI vakhata icchA pUrI to nA thAya. icchAnA mULa eTalA UMDA hoya, ke jJAna hoya te chatAM ya e satAva satAva karatI hoya to e kADhavI kevI rIte ? icchAne nirmULa kevI rIte karavI ? dAdAzrI : tethI ApaNe kahIe chIene, eka-be avatAra thaze. te je icchA badhI adhUrI che, te badhI pUrI thaI jaze. icchAo pUrI thayA sivAya mokSamAM koI pesavA de nahIM. jeTalI jeTalI icchAo che e pUrI thavI ja joIe. bahu UMDI hoya to AvatA bhavamAM Ave pAchI paNa pUrI kare. praznakartA : to ApaNe evuM karavuM ke AjathI badhI icchAo pUrI karavA ja mAMDavI ? dAdAzrI : karone ! tamane meM kyAre nA pADI che ?

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judApaNAnI jAgRti praznakartA : A phAIla naMbara Tu karI Ape tyAre mArI icchA pUrI thAyane, A nathI karI ApatA icchA pUrI. huM mahela nathI mAgatI, eka nAnI vastu paMdara varSathI mAguM chuM to ya e nathI ApatA. 43 dAdAzrI : e to tAruM prArabdha vAMkuM. tAruM prArabdha jo taiyAra hazene to A duniyAmAM ApaNe nA kahIe to ya lAvIne ApI jAya. haju aMtarAya tUTyA nathI. A aMtarAya che. have aMtarAya toDI nAkhIe enA. mArI pAse vAta nIkaLI eTale aMtarAya tUTI javA AvyA. 'caMdu' khedamAM te 'tame' jJAtamAM ! atyAra sudhI to kahetA hatA ke mane thayuM, paNa have jJAna pachI eno sahakAra na karo ke mane thayuM ! alyA, tamane zI rIte thAya ? tamane to dAdAe judA banAvyA ! judA nathI pADyA ?! praznakartA : judA ja chIe. dAdAzrI : hA, tyAre juduM ja rAkhavuM joIene ! AkhuM jagata sAyakolojIkala rogathI pIDAya che 'mane thayuM' kahIne. 'amAro ja vevAI mane gALo bhAMDI gayo', kahe. koI bhUla karI hoya ane kheda nA thAya te ya khoTuM. kheda to thavo ja joIe. tene ApaNe jANyA karIe ke caMdubhAI bahu khedamAM che. te ApaNe caMdubhAIno khabho thAbaDI ApIe. AnuM avalaMbana laIne kheda baMdha karI de to pAchuM kAcuM rahI jaze. kheda to thavo joIe. jeNe avaLuM karyuM, teno kheda to ene thavo ja joIe. eTale kheda thAya tyAre pachI ApaNe kahevuM ke, 'have bhUlanAM pratikramaNa karo, pratyAkhyAna lo. ame chIene tamArI joDe. cAlo zakti mAgo.' A to akrama vijJAna che. lokotI draSTimAM, zuddhAtmA thayA ke caMdu rahyA ? loka tamane oLakhe kyAre ? vartana sAruM hoya tyAre. A zuddhAtmA thayA che evuM oLakhe kyAre ? atyAre to caMdubhAI che, evuM ja jANene badhAM ? ane tame ema jANo ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM'. tamAruM jJAna juduM ne 44 loko jANe e jJAna juduM, juduM nahIM ? praznakartA : hA. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : eTale lokone ema khabara nathIne ke A zuddhAtmA thayA che. zuddhAtmA thayA kyAre kahevAya ? bahAranuM vartana pharI jAya tyAre loko samaje. eTale loko jANatA nathIne haju. jANaze tyAre vAta judI che. atyAre tamArA ziSya thAya koI ? nA. zAthI ? avaLuM-savaLuM bolAI jAya, bIjuM kaMI vartana dekhene badhAM ? praznakartA : hA, vartana dekhe. dAdAzrI : loka to, emane anubhava thAya. emane kazuM karI ApIe ne emane AnaMda thAya to e ziSya thAya. A to tame jJAnanI samajaNa pADo toya che te e jANe ke A dAdAnI vAta bolI rahyA che. e jyAre ApaNe zuddhAtmA svarUpamAM rahIne bolatAM hoIe ane AnaMda thAya, tyAre evAM thazo. paNa tyAM sudhI to tamane ziSya nathI ne, eTale ApaNe pahelAM ziSya caMdubhAIne banAvavA. nA samaja paDI ? eTale 'tamane' caMdubhAI to eka ziSya jabarajasta suMdara ziSya maLyA. 'eya... Ama kara, tema kara' ene kahevuM. cetavavA, samajaNa pADavI, bhUlo batAvavI, pratikramaNa karAvavA. te ulTuM sAruM phAve. huM kahuM ne to paNa mAruM keTalAM jaNa sAMbhaLe e ?! ane tame kaho to caMdubhAI sAMbhaLe. ziSya pote potAnA thavuM paDe. A caMdubhAIne tamArA ziSya banAvavAnA. bIjo koNa ziSya thAya ? caMdubhAIno koI ziSya thAya ? praznakartA : nA thAya. dAdA, ApanI vAta ekadama sarasa che ! dAdAzrI : jema Amane emanI phAIla naMbara vana ziSya thAya ane 'tamAre' 'caMdubhAI' ziSya thAya. amane to loko badhAya ziSya thAya. eTale tame mArA jevA thaI jAva, to tamane bahAranA loko ziSya thAya. //////////

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[1.3] judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! samajo prayoga judApaNAto ! praznakartA : Apa satsaMgamAM thoDI thoDI vAre judA pADavAno prayoga kahetAM ja ho cho. dAdAzrI : e mukhya vastu ja e che ne ! praznakartA : mana kazuM batADe to manane kahI devuM ke tAruM nahIM cAle. eTale mana sAthe vAta karI ke chUTuM paDI ja jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, chUTuM paDI ja jAya ane A dehane phAIla naMbara vana kahyuM toya chUTuM paDI jAya. praznakartA : A je judApaNAno prayoga che Apano, te kevI rIte hoya che ? Apane e saheje ekjhekTa juduM dekhAyA kare ? dAdAzrI : dekhAya e to. A pudgalabhAga ane A cetanabhAga. e rIte badhuM oLakhAya ja. evI jAgRti hoya. dUdhInuM zAka karavuM hoya to jAgRti hoya ke choDAM judAM kADhI nAkhavAnA, DITuM juduM kADhI nAkhavAnuM. pachI samArI de haDahaDATa ! evuM amane jaDa-cetananuM juduM ja rahe ! jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM eTale zuM ke caMdubhAI zuM kare e tame jANyA karo, AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) caMdubhAIe chokarAMne dhola mArI ne kakaLATa karato hoya te ApaNe jANavuM ke caMdubhAI haju kakaLATa kare che ! ApaNe caMdubhAIne kahevAya kharuM ke zA hAru kakaLATa karo cho vagara kAmanA ? hA, khuzIthI kahevAya. ane ko'ka phero Thapako ya Apavo. 'caMdubhAI, zA hAru karo cho' kahIe. pahelethI, paraNyA tyArathI AvA ne AvA hatA e. 'have jarA pAMsarA thaI jAvane, bhaI. dAdA maLyA have to !' 46 praznakartA : hA, ane Ape chUTA pADI ApyA pachI e caMdubhAI sAmo javAba Ape ke nA, huM Ama ne Ama rahIza. dAdAzrI : nA, have e bole nahIM. akSare ya bole nahIM. jAta joDe vAtacItano prayoga ! praznakartA : barobara. Apa kaho cho ame vANInA jJAtA-draSTA, vANI 'joyA' karIe zuM nIkaLe che e, to ekcyulI aMdara AvI rIte kaho, aMdara AvI rIte vAta karo, evuM kaMIkane ? dAdAzrI : evuM jotAM zIkho. tuM caMdubhAIne 'jotAM' zIkha. praznakartA : hA, paNa e 'jotAM' zIkhavuM eTale AvI rIte vAta karavAnIne aMdara chu dAdAzrI : vAta karIe to 'jovAnuM' vadhAre zIkhAya. inTaresTa paDato jAya eTale judA tarIke rahevAno bhAva thato jAya ane che ja judA eTalA badhA ! praznakartA : AvI rIte bolavAthI kharekhara e judApaNAno vyavahA2 zarU thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : e gammata karavAthI, mazkarI karavAthI, jovAthI judApaNuM thaI jAya. huM to evuM hau kahuMne, kema cho ! majAmAM chone ! aMbAlAlabhAI, laheramAM AvyA cho, kaMIka lAge che !' eTale ame phreza rahI zakIene ! te ame Akho divasa phreza rahIe chIe, te ATaluM kAma kare che.

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! 47 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) nathIne ! have to tame AkhA bhagavAna thaI gayA lAgo chone !' to kahe, nA, tame bhagavAna cho, bhagavAna huM nahIM ! ya paTela sAthe karato vAto ! ajJAna atyAre ya AnuM uparANuM le che. ApaNe ene kahIene, to rAge paDI jAya. kahIe ke tAre je raste javuM hoya te raste jA. nahIM to ApaNe ghera zuM khoTAM hatAM ? praznakartA : barAbara che. dAdAzrI : plAniMga moTuM che. pragati karavI nathI, mArI hAjarImAM ?! nahIM to AvuM to kahetAMnI sAthe ja phAIla naMbara vana sAthe vAta karavA mAMDe. huM paTela sAthe bahu vAto karato'to. mane majhA Ave evI vAto karavAnI. ame hau AvaDA moTA chottera varSanA aMbAlAlabhaIne evuM kahIe ne !! "choMtera varSothI kaMI DAhyA thayA cho ?! e to ghaDatarathI praznakartA : Ape bahu varSo pahelAM kaheluM ke jAta joDe vAtacIta karajo ! bahu zakti vadhI jaze. te e vAtacItano prayoga bahu UMcAmAM UMcI vastu che. ATaluM ApaNuM akrama vijJAnanuM je kahIene, A judA paDavAnI je prakriyAnI Akho AdhAra jevI vastu che A. - dAdAzrI : ApaNe kahIe ke 'tAre bahu cA pIvI sArI nahIM.' tyAre kahe, ke "nA, pIvI che." "to pIo pachI." vAtacIta karI, judApaNAno lAbha laIe ApaNe. praznakartA H barobara che. ane AvI vAtacItathI bahAranI nirjarA to enI meLe thavAnI ja. A upayogapUrvaka kahevAyane AkhuM ? AkhuM Ama eTale bahAra mAMdagInI asaro hoya, vikanesa hoya toya aMdara vAtacIta cAlu ja rahevAnI. dAdAzrI : e to judejudI rahevAnI. praznakartA : e vakhate Apa zuM vAta karo ? dAdAzrI : badhI ja. e to jema che ema ja. praznakartA eTale pUcho Apa aMdara? kema lAge che tabiyata, pUcho evuM badhuM karo ? - dAdAzrI : A bhaI kahe ke dAdA, have rUmamAM mahIM thoDuM cAlo, pharo. to phare, te ghaDIe huM joto rahuM ke "ohoho ! kevA dekhAya che ! zuM veza tamArA thayA che ? A tame cAlo cho te upara mane hasavuM Ave ke A veza to juo ! koIne aDavA nA de evA mANasa, te tamane hAtha jhAlIne pheravavA paDe che !' praznakartA : eTale AmAM peluM koIne aDavA nA de, e ja tame. hAtha jhAlIne cAlo cho, e ja tame ! badhuM AkhuM juduM paDI jAya. AmAM Akho ahaMkAra nA rahe. mAlikIbhAva nA rahe. badhuM ja UDI jAya AkhuM ! dAdAzrI : ame chUTa ApIe ene ke je karavuM hoya, ene pachI ame jarA AvI gammata karI laIe ke "ohoho ! tamane to kazuM aDatuM ja DAhyA thayA !" praznakartA : tame kyArathI vAto karatA'tA ? dAdAzrI : jJAna thayA pachI. pahelAM to kevI rIte vAta karuM huM? 'huM judo chuM' evuM bhAna thayuM ne pachIthI ! je paiNavA beThA'tA e ya yAda karIne aMbAlAlane kahIe ke, ohoho. tame to kaMI paiNavA beThA'tA ne ! pachI mAthethI pAghaDI khasI gayelI, tyAre pachI rAMDavAno vicAra Avelo tamane evuM hau kahuM chuM. dekhAya peluM. kevI pAghaDI khasI gayelI hatI, ne kevuM badhuM paNavAmAM mAruM hatuM, te dekhAya. vicAra karatAnI sAthe dekhAya. ame bolIe ane amane AnaMda Ave. AvI vAta karIe eTale e khuza thaI jAya ! amArA' anubhavatI vAta ! huM pharsTa klAsamAM musApharI nA karuM. kAraNa ke bIjA pesenjaro pachI

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! 49 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) pAchaLa paDe che. mane vAMkuM bolatAM AvaDatuM nathI. paoNlIza karatAM nathI AvaDatuM. e pUche ke ApanuM saranAmuM zuM, to huM kahI dauM eTale e pAcho ghera Ave. eTale A to badhI vaLagADa pAra vagaranI. enA karatAM mArA sagA bhAIo jevA badhA tharDa klAsavALA pesenjaro sArA che. eTale zuM jatAM-AvatAM ko'kanI Thokaro vAge to mahIM zuM kaSAyabhAva bharelA che te khabara paDe. ko'kanI Thokara vAgI hoya, te zuM kacAzo badhI mAlama paDe. eTale kacAzo badhI ema karIne nIkaLI jAya. pachI A paga du:khene eTale zuM kahyuM, 'aMbAlAlabhAI, paga tamane bahu dukhyA, nahIM ? thAkI gayA cho. kAraNa ke Ama ne Ama ekaDAIne beThA hazone eTale paga dukhyA che." eTale pAcho bAtharUmamAM teDI jauM ne tyAM jaIne khabho thAbaDuM, 'huM tamArI joDe chuMne, zuM kAma Daro cho ? ame zuddhAtmA bhagavAna chIe ne, tamArI joDe.' eTale pAchA pharsTa klAsa thaI jAya. muzkelImAM Ave tyAre khabho thAbaDIne kahevuM. pahelAM eka hatA, te have be thayA. pahelAM to koIno sahAro ja na hato. pote ja potAnI meLe sahAro khoLatA rahe. ekanA be thayA. AvuM koI phero karyuM'tuM ke nahotuM karyuM ? praznakartA: karyuM che. dAdAzrI : te ghaDIe ApaNane judI jAtanuM lAgene ? jANe AkhA brahmAMDanA rAjA hoyane evI rIte ApaNe bolavAnuM hoya. A badhuM mArA anubhavanI vAta tamane badhI dekhADI dIdhI. dareka joDe kare dAdA vAto ! A kyArano pUcha pUcha kare che, pistA lAvuM ? kerI lAvuM ? alyA, pistA besI rahelAM hoya tene A uThADe pAchA ! peloya evuM kare, 'dAdA, A lAvuM, kerI lAvuM.' have besI rahevA dene eka jagyAe emane, pistAne ! praznakartA : dAdA, ApanI vANImAM chene, pelI patarAnI peTI rAkhatA'tA. peTIne kahI dIdheluM ke tAre jayAre javuM hoya tyAre jaje. eTale enI joDeya vAtacIta pachI. dAdAzrI : tAre jyAre javuM hoya tyAre jaje, amArI icchA nathI. ame to A sUI gayA. praznakartA : paNa tuM jAya to mane vAMdho nathI. dAdAzrI : nA. 'evuM vAMdho nathI.' evuM nA bolIe. 'tAre jyAre javuM hoya tyAre jaje, amArI icchA nathI.' 'vAMdho nathI' evuM bolIe to to ciDAIne jatI rahe. ApaNe to 'amArI icchA nathI' ema kahevuM, ne pachI 'tAre javuM hoya to jaje." praznakartA: pelI sTImaranI kAnamAM phUMka mArI. dAdAzrI : hA, phUMka mArI dIdhI. eTale 'jyAre DUbavuM hoya tyAre DUbaje, amArI icchA nathI. jo amArI icchA DUbADavAnI tane hoya to A pUjA zuM karavA karI ?" pUjA-bhUjA karAvIne pachI cAlu mUkIe. praznakartA : eTale AmAM khUbI e che ke, dareka joDe sTImara, bega, pelI cA hoya, pistA hoya enA astitvanI joDe vAtacIta hoya. dAdAzrI: hA, te evI rIte ja hoyane ! A badhAM buddhine kahe che, kAle bapore jamavA Avaje' to e Aje Dakhala kare nahIM. A loko nA kahe tyAM sudhI pelI mahIM phaNagA mAra mAra kare. AvuM che A to badhuM mahIM. A ya have caMcaLatAne pAmeluM citta, mizracetanatA che, pAvaravALuM che. nA kahIe to to Aveya pAchuM, eno bhAga bhajavyA vagara nA rahe. TrenamAM Ama bega mUkI sUI jaIe ame to. loka kaheze, 'bega laI jAya che." are mUA, e vAta jANI. have e jANIne zuM evuM hitakArI thaI paDaze ? AkhI rAta jagADaze. ane tuM jhokuM khauM, te ghaDIe laI gayo hoya. have melane chAla, AnA karatAM to suI jAne nirAMte. jo thavAnuM haze to laI janAro to rAha jue ? enAM karatAM AkhI rAta sUI gayA. 'tAre jyAre javuM hoya tyAre jaje, amArI icchA nathI." paNa e savAre dekhAya kharI. praznakartA : eTale joDAneya kahI dIdheluM.

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! - 51 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : hA, joDAne, 'tamAre jyAre javuM hoya tyAre jajo.' huM kyAM tamArI upAdhi karuM AkhI rAta ! mane to sUI rahevA done nirAMte ! kevI rIte jAya che, Ave che e ame jANIe pahelethI. eTale e tamane kahI daIe. praznakartA : AmAM kahevAnuM che, e prayogano hetu zo che Akho ? dAdAzrI : e ekkekTa phaLa Ape che tethI. praznakartA : paNa AvuM koIneya vicAra ja nA Ave ke AnI joDe vAta karIe. Ape kevI rIte A prayoga Ubho karyo ? dAdAzrI : jyAM sudhI buddhikaLA ne jJAnakaLA phUTe nahIM tyAM sudhI AvAM vicAra kevI rIte Ave ? A to buddhikaLA che. e kaLA kyAMthI hoya mANasanAmAM ? evuM gajuM nahIMne ! eka phero haju joDe rahe tyAra pachI Ama thoDI zIkhe eTale buddhikaLA AvatI jAya enAmAM. pachI enI meLe phUTe amuka kALa pachI, paNa buddhikaLA jANato ja nathIne ! buddhi nAmanI kaLA, e to kaheze mahIM, "AmanAM breIna Tonika badhAM bhAre che." hoya alyA, mUA breIna to mArA karatAM bahu che, moTA moTA solisITarone ! A to amArI buddhikaLA che. jJAtIto gamo-aNagamo ! praznakartA H Apane lAIka ke DislAIka evuM kazuM ja koI dahADo thAya nahIM ? dAdAzrI : thAya. ahIM AgaLa (nIce) besavAnuM hoya to udayakarma DislAIka kahe ane "ame' pachI kahIe ke lAika che ! eTale udayakarma kahene. badhI bAbatamAM nahIM, amuka bAbatamAM kahe. jeTaluM cokhkhuM nathI karyuM eTalI bAbatamAM kahe. cokhkhuM thaI gayuM hoya e nA kahe. aMdara avaLuM bole to ApaNe savaLuM bolIe. e kahe ke nabaLAI lAge che, to kahIe bolo, 'caMdulAla, anaMta zaktivALo chuM. plasa-mAinasa to karavuM paDe ? arIsAmAM pUrNa judApaNuM ! praznakartA : badhI paravazatAthI mukta kevI rIte thayuM ? dAdAzrI : paravazatA to caMdubhAIne che, tamane nathIne ? tamAre caMdubhAIne kahevuM, "ame chIe tArI joDe, tAre kaMI vAMdho che, gabharAvAnuM nahIM. tuM lokono paravaza nA rahIza. amArI joDe paravaza raheje. bIjA koIno paravaza rahIza nahIM' evuM bolIe. Ama judApaNAnI jAgRti che, paNa te nA bolatAM phAve to Ama arIsAmAM dekhADIne vAtacIta karavI. tane dekhAya ke nA dekhAya ? tane gamyuM ne ? A rasto gamyo ne ? hA, amane pUche eTale ame je rastA karatAM hoya, te ja rastA tamane dekhADIe. praznakartA : ameya karIe ne ! dAdAzrI : to karavo hoya to A rahyo arIso, koNa nA pADe che? 'huM sAthe chuM ne dAdA mAthe che. bola zenI aDacaNa che ?" basa, eTale thaI gayo cUpa. ame AvuM karatA'tA. bhalene paga dukhatAM hoya, paNa AkhI rAta nIkaLI jAya. 'ame chIe tArI joDe" eTaluM kahIe, ke enI sAthe vAto karIe. nahIM to AzvAsana ApanAra koI nathIne ! atyAre koI mANasane bahu khoTa gaI hoya ane koI kaheze, "ame chIe tArI joDe', to pelA bicArAne rAte UMgha Ave, paNa evuM koI kahenAruM ja nathIne atyAre to ? jANIe tAtapaNathI jAtate ! A jJAna pachI have tamArAmAM krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha rahyA nathI. have tamArAmAM koI jAtanuM kazuM rahyuM nathI. sarvasva zuddhAtmA tame thaI gayA cho. have mana-buddhi-citta ne ahaMkAra badhuM caMdubhAInuM ane tamAre kazuM levAdevA nahIM. ne manamAM kaDhApo kare ke ajaMpo kare, A badhuM tamAre joyA karavAnuM. tamArAM have ghara badalAyA. tamAro vibhAga zuddhAtmA vibhAga ane A che te caMdubhAIno A vibhAga. te tamAre banne vibhAgamAM dhyAna rAkhavAnuM. have mana e caMdubhAInA vibhAgamAM gayuM, have e manano

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! 54 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) upayoga tamAre nahIM karavAno. mana je karatuM hoya te, jhAvAdAvA karatuM hoya ke game te, joyA karavAnuM. kharAba mana hoya ne caMdubhAI kaMTALe, to pachI pAchaLathI ApaNe khabho thAbaDI ApavAno ke ame tamArI joDe chIe, gabharAzo nahIM. ApaNo koI khabho ThokanAra maLe nahIM A duniyAmAM, ApaNe jAte ThokIe to ja, ApaNe zuddhAtmA bhagavAna chIe. pahelAM koI kahenAruM ja hotuMne ! khabho thAbaDanAra koI hatuM nahIMne ! A ApaNo upayoga zuddha kahevAya. koI nA hoya tyAre ApaNe pUchavuM ke 'caMdubhAI, Aje tame sAruM karyuM." ane bIje dahADe jarA ciDAyo hoya te kahevuM ke 'bhaI, AvuM A ciDAvuM sAruM nA kahevAya. mATe pratikramaNa karo.' bane ke nA bane evuM ?! basa, eTaluM ja karavAnuM che ApaNe. tame oLakho ke nA oLakho phAIla naMbara vanane ? praznakartA : hA, barAbara. dAdA pAse AvyA pachI e pADozIne barAbara oLakhIe. dAdAzrI : nAnapaNathI oLakho ? emanuM jIvanacaritra pahelethI badhuM jANo ke nA jANo ? lapaTo paDI gayo hoya to nA kAma lAgene ? loka kaheya kharAMne, 'lapaTo paDI gayo che'. lapaTo hau paDI jAyane ? ane prakRtimAM AtmA lapaTo paDe te to sAro. ApaNe mahIM vAsIe toye pharI pAcho chUTo ne chUTo. arIsAmAM joIne jarAka pAchaLa kahezone, tyAre AtmA lapaTo paDI jaze. pachI ApaNe majabUta karavA jaIe te nA thAya. lapaTo paDI gayo che. Apelo AtmA zuddhAtmA che, lapaTo paDIne bIjo kaMI bagADa joDe AvavAno nathI. Apelo zuddhAtmA che, eTale ja chUTo paDI zake. ApaNe pUchIe tyAre javAba maLe. tame che te, caMdubhAI joDe vAta karone, koI dA'Do karelI ? to ApaNe caMdubhAIne pUchIe ke 'tamAre have kaMI hiMsA karavAnA bhAva thAya che ?" tyAre e 'nA' kahe. 'koInuM laI levuM che ?" tyAre kahe, 'nA'. pUchIe to javAba Ape ke nA Ape ? praznakartA : Ape. dAdAzrI : kAraNa ke mizracetana che ne ! hA, AtmAne kazuM ja karavuM paDatuM nathI. AtmAnI khAlI hAjarIthI ja, A mizracetana cAle che ! pote potAto thAbaDavo khabho ! ko'ka phero DhIlA thaI jAya, to Ama khabho Thokavo ! koI khabhA ThokanAreya maLyo nathI. mANasa keTalo trAsI jAya bicAro ! pAMca lAkha khoTa gaI ane bApAne kahe to e kaheze, "pAMca lAkha khoTa gaI ?! tArAmAM barakata ja nathI." alyA mUA, e AzvAsana levA Avyo toya UlaTo A veza karyo !! bairIne kahe, e jANe ke bairI mane AzvAsana Apaze. amAruM aDadhuM aMgane, ardhAMganA AzvAsana Apaze ! tyAre kaheze, "ame to tamane roja kahetA'tA ke jarA dukAne jaIne beso. A mahetA barAbara nathI." te A AzvAsana mane atyAre je joIe e AzvAsana Apane ! eTale have tamAre A khabo thAbaDI AzvAsana ApavAnuM ke ame chIe. evuM AzvAsana koI nA Ape. have jone, eka phero TapalI mArI to juo ! juo caMdubhAI doDe che ne ! eka phero ya koI khabho thAbaDanAra maLyuM ja nathI A duniyAmAM. A jeTalAM prayoga praznakartA : hA, dAdA. dAdAzrI : to pachI tamAre emane kahevuM ke 'bhAI, have Ama nahIM cAle. have Ama cAlo. atyAra sudhI to ame sUI rahyA hatA, te cAlI gayuM tamAruM. paNa have ame jAgIe ja chIe. te jAgyA, te cAlo amAre pAchalo daMDa karavo nathI tamane. paNa have jAgyA chIe to amArI maryAdA rAkho'. to e evI sarasa maryAdA rAkhaze. kharekharI maryAdA rAkhaze. A to evuM che ke kahenAra joIe. kAraNa ke ApaNI hAjarImAM ApaNe ghera e badhAMe khAdhuM. e pachI e ApaNA nA thAya to konAM thavAnAM che? te prakRtithI lapaTo paDe Atama.. arIsAmAM joIne roja caMdubhAIne kahevuM eTale AtmA chUTo paDato jAya. ne prakRtithI AtmA lapaTo thayo to kAma thaI gayuM. zIzAmAM to bUca

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AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! 55 amArA anubhavanA che e badhA anubhava tamane ApI dIdhA che. je hathiyAra meM vApayA che te ApI dIdhAM. ame arIsA sAmuM joIne thAbaDatA'tA tyAre DAhyA thaI gayA jo A, chottera varSe. A chotteramuM besaze. ema ne ema kADhyAM nathI ! koI thAbaDe ? ghera tAre koI thAbaDe ? koI nA thAbaDe. ghera to badhuM ahaMkArI. UMdhuM ja bole. A to kahe, 'tane huM pahelethI nA kaheto'to, akkala vagarano jo chevaTe UMdhuM karI nAkhyuMne teM ?" alyA mUA, ATalA hAru nathI Avyo, atyAre to mane ApaghAta karavAnuM mana thAya che tyAre huM tamArI pAse AzvAsana levA Avyo chuM. paNa tyAre jaMpIne nA besavA de. have zuM thAya ? udAsIta mata joDe vAto karo ! praznakartA : mAre ema thAya ke mAre thoDuMka lakhavuM che. saMsthAnuM thoDuMka kAma karavuM che. pachI copaDI laIne besuM, thoDIka vAra thAya eTale pelI copaDImAM jarAya mana nA lAge ane pachI AptasUtra ke dAdAnuM koI pustaka laIne vAMcuM. kAle A karIza. ema karatAM karatAM divaso vItatA jAya che. peluM hAthamAM lauM. paNa ema thAya ke nathI karavuM, jatuM karuM. eTale mana, jene kalpI nA zakAya eTaluM badhuM udAsIna banI gayeluM che. dAdAzrI : nA, paNa ApaNe thoDuMka thoDuMka kahevuM caMdubhAIne, thoDI vAtacIta karavI. caMdulAla joDe tamAre vAtacIta karavI have ke jarAka e tarapha vaLe. bheda rAkhavo paDe. tamAre chUTA rahIne bolavAmAM vAMdho nahIM. chUTA rahIne bolIene to dhIme dhIme rAge paDe. te jarAka ATaluM sudhArajone ! tame caMdulAla joDe vAtacIta karavAnI rAkho. kAle thaI jatuM hoyane to ApaNe kahevuM caMdulAlane ke 'bhaI, A kAle karatAM Aja karI Avone' ! te eTale pachI zuM thAya, e thayA karaze ane jarUra che AnI. A to vastu sthitimAM je che ne pharajiyAta, e karyA vagara chUTako ja nahIMne ! e TAIma tyAM ja javAno haze ane A pramANe goThavAyeluM haze te kare. karavuM paDene ! jamavAnuM moDuM karatA hoya to kahIe, 'jamI lone TAImasara. vAMdho zuM che ?" tame juo, vAtacIta karI juo to kharAM. eTale pachI tamane peluM evuM nahIM lAge ke haju mane asara thaI che. kAraNa tame chUTA thaI gayA. tame chUTA thayA, have Ane kahevAnuM, tamArI pharaja che ene cetavavAnI. pharaja pADozI tarIke. pADozI tarIke pharaja nahIM ? kema lAge che ? e to bharelo mAla, te nIkaLe to kharone ? nA nIkaLe to mahIM gaMdhAyA kare koThImAM. pAchuM paiDapaNamAM nIkaLe enAM karatAM haju sAruM che zarIra, haju vAMdho nathIne ? zarIra sAruM chene ? amane kaho to tamArI khabara paDene ? paNa zarIrane have e nA karatA. zarIrane kahIe, 'tuM gabharAIza nahIM, tAro doSa nathI. doSa kono hato, te huM jANuM chuM'. ahaMkArano doSa hato. ahaMkAre bhareluM A badhuM. Ama thAya "prakRti'te Teksa ! praznakartA : have e kazuM karavAnuM nathI. e je AjJA Ape ApI ke have kazuM tamAre karavAnuM nathI. have koI mANasane vAMcavAnuM mana thatuM hoya, koI mANasane kriyA karavAnuM mana thatuM hoya toya paNa A upayoga te vakhate rahe che ke A mAre karavAnuM nathI, A to mAro udayakarma che ane mAre DiscArja karIne kADhavAno che. dAdAzrI : A to huM karato nathI, A caMdubhAI kare che evuM caMdubhAInA nAmathI ja vyavahAra rAkhavo ApaNe. udayakarma bolavuM ja nA paDe. 'caMdubhAI kema cho ? tamArI tabiyata sArI che ke nahIM ?" savAramAM UThIne pUchIegAchIe badhuM. kAraNa ke ApaNA pADozI chene ! vAMdho zo che ? ema karIne tame kAma to lejo. juo, kevuM suMdara kare che ! prakRtinI joDe.. praznakartA : laDavAnI jarUra nathI. dAdAzrI : nahIM. prakRtinI joDe eDajasTa thatAM AvaDavuM joIe. prakRti to suMdara svabhAvanI che. prakRti bahu suMdara hoya paNa ApaNe ene gUMcavIe chIe. eTale ApaNe emeya kahevAya, 'have to tame A putronA phAdhara, dIkarIonA

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! phAdhara, tamArI to vAta ja judIne ! tame moTA vakIla thayA.' evI vAtacIta karavAmAM vAMdho nahIM. rUma vAsIne vAtacIta karavI. ApaNe to bolyA konuM nAma kahevAya ke ApaNA kAna sAMbhaLe evuM. bIjo na sAMbhaLe ne ApaNA kAna sAMbhaLe, e bolatAM ja nathIne paNa ! ane ApaNe thayA chIe chUTA ane tethI chUTApaNuM pratyakSa anubhavAya che. keTalAMka to AvuM bole che ne mahIM pratyakSa chUTApaNuM anubhave che. paNa tamAre 'kema cho - kema nahIM' e pUchavAmAM zuM vAMdho, pADozI thaIne vAMdho zuM che ? ane toya cA to pIvAnA ja che ane kaMI ApaNI cA che ? e emanI ja cA che. ApaNI che ja nahIMne ! jarA doDha kapa cA-bA pIo' kahIe. pelAne kahIe, 'Apo, caMdubhAIne cA Apo.' hasatAM-ramatAM mokSe javAya evo mArga che ! 57 so TakA judApaNAto anubhava ! praznakartA : eTale Ama ekalA beThAM hoIe ane sAMje beThAM hoya to caMdubhAIne joyA karavAnuM ke dAdAzrI : caMdubhAIne jovAnAM. te enuM mana zuM karI rahyuM che, enI buddhi zuM karI rahI che, ahaMkAra zuM karI rahyo che e joyA karavAnuM. ane badhuM zAMta hoya to caMdubhAI judA dekhAya, ene joyA karavAnAM. arIsAmAM moDhuM jozene, caMdubhAI dekhAya. ene joyA karavAnuM. pachI ApaNAthI bolAya kharuM ke 'caMdubhAI, tame to bahu sArA cho. bahu DAhyA dekhAo cho.' evuM badhuM bolAya ApaNAthI. ApaNe enI joDe vAto karIe eTale pachI e so TakA chUTApaNuM che eno anubhava thAya ! praznakartA : eTale ApaNe AkhA divasane aMte besIne caMdubhAIne joIe ane yAda karIne ema kahIe ke Aje savAre teM Ama karyuM hatuM. Aje bapore gusso karyo hato... dAdAzrI : hA, te badhuM kahevAya. praznakartA : e ja joyuM kahevAyane ? prakRti joI kahevAyane ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : hA. 'joyA' pachI ApaNe kahIe kharA, ke Ama karyuM te A zobhe nahIM. have to uMmara thaI. have mokSe javuM che ne ?" 58 praznakartA : hA. eTale gusso thaI gayo hoya to pachI ApaNe vaDhIe ene ke 'A tame zuM karo cho ? A dAdA maLyA pachI have A gusso karo cho, zobhatA nathI !' dAdAzrI : hA, basa. 'A tamane zobhe nahIM.' hA, vaDhAya, vaDhAya.... praznakartA : e badhuM joyuM kahevAyane ? dAdAzrI : hA, e joyuM kahevAya. praznakartA : e anubhava kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, e anubhava kahevAya. tamAre thoDuM thoDuM kahevAya ke, 'have tamAre uMmara thaI che. jarA vicAro have Ama ! sAsu ahIM nathI eTale ropha mAro cho !' evuM kahevuM joIe. sAsu TaiDakAve to zuM karIe ?! 'koI kahenAra nathI eTale tame AvuM karo cho ?" jeTaluM kahevAya eTaluM kahevuM. emAM kaMI AbarU javAnI che ? AbarU to gayelI ja chene ! AbarU gayelI eTale to A dAdA maLyA, ane AbarUdAra loko to jo kevA phare che ! e lokone mahIM ciMtA karavI che, paNa bahAra AbarU rAkhavI che ke bahAra AbarU nahIM javA daIe ! vAgha joIne mAMdo kevo doDe ! AkhuM jagata avasthAmAM ja tanmayAkAra thAya. ajJAnInI samaja kevI hoya ? avasthAmAM ja tanmayAkAra. je avasthA utpanna thaI temAM ja tanmayAkAra. garIbI avasthA utpanna thaI to garIbImAM. zrImaMtAI thaI eTale emAM tanmayAkAra. Ama sAMDha jevo phare. eTale tanmayAkAra thaIne pharyA kare. tAva Ave, to huM zuM karuM ? calAtuM nathI. huM zuM karuM ? amathA mUA, 'calAtuM nathI, calAtuM nathI' ema kahIne UlaTo narama thaI jAya. jevuM bole tevo thaI jAya. AtmAno svabhAva jevuM bole tevo

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! thaI jAya. ane pelo to bole, 'calAtuM nathI, paga to cAlatA ja nathI.' pachI paga jANe ke ApaNane kahe che ke cAlatA nathI. te vaDhanAra nathI koI.' ApaNe kahIe ke 'nA kema cAle ? cAla AgaLa !' Ama be ThapakArIe to enI meLe cAle. nA kema cAle ? karAra karyo che. karAra pUro thayo nathI haju. phAIla naM. 1 ne khavaDAvIe-pIvaDAvIe ne cAle kema nahIM ? kaI jAtanI vAta ! cA-pANI pAIe masAledAra ane ghImAM taLelAM pAu evuM badhuM khavaDAvIe-pIvaDAvIe, to ya pAcho kahe, 'cAle nahIM ?" to ApaNe kahIe, 'cAla. cAle che ke nathI cAlato ?" vAgha pAchaLa paDe to cAle ke nahIM cAle ? tyAre vAgha pAchaLa paDe ne doDIe, enA karatAM jANone ke vAgha pAchaLa ja paDelo che ne ? saMsAra vAgha ja che ne ! saMsAra vAgha karatAM ye vasamo che. vAgha to eka phero khaI jAya ne saMsAra bhavobhava khaI jAya. 59 karAra karyA pramANe badhuM cAlavuM paDe ne ? cAlavAnuM eNe. ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM. ame amArI pharaja nA bajAvIe to kahejo. cAlavAnuM tamAre. ame 'joIe' ! doSo sAme jAgRti... zUTa ona sAITa. doSa dekhAyo ke 'caMdubhAI cAlo, pratikramaNa karo' kahIe. caMdubhAIno tamAre dama kADhI nAkhavo have. tyAre caMdubhAI kaheze, 'A paiDapaNane lIdhe thatuM nathI.' tyAre kahevuM, 'ame tamane zakti ApIzuM.' tyAre kahe, 'Apo'. tyAre ApaNe pachI bolAvavuM. bolo, huM anaMta zaktivALo chuM'. ApaNe bolAvIene, te zakti pAchI ApaNA AtmAmAMthI emAM paDe pAchI. kaMTALI gayA hoya to ApaNe karavuM ja paDene ! pADozI chene ! ane nizcetana cetana che. jIva vagara bIjA pAMceya tattvamAM cetana che nahIM ! jene potAnA doSa dekhAvA mAMDyA, tyAMthI jANavuM ke have ukela AvavAno thayo ! jene chello upayoga rAkhavo hoyane, to caMdubhAI atyAre zuM mUMjhavaNamAM che, caMdubhAIne Tenzana keTaluM che, e badhuM ApaNe 'joyA' karIe, enuM nAma chello upayoga ! AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : Tenzana anubhavAtuM hoya, vedanA anubhavAtI hoya to ? dAdAzrI : vedanA anubhavAya nahIM, e anubhavane 'jovAnuM' ke "ahoho, caMdubhAI ! khUba Tenzana anubhavo cho ? ame chIene tamArI joDe. vAMdho nahIM, cA-bA pIo jarA.' ApaNe vAto karIe pachI. 60 praznakartA : e rIte caMdubhAI sAthe vAto karavI, e upayoga karyo kahevAyane ? dAdAzrI : A chello upayoga ! caMdubhAIne 'joyA' ja karavuM. caMdubhAIne keTaluM Tenzana vadhyuM-ghaTyuM e badhuM 'joyA' karo. pachI ApaNe kahIe, 'ame chIe tamArI joDe, gabharAzo nahIM'. basa, ATaluM ja karavAnuM che. e ja upayoga rAkhavAno che. game tevuM Tenzana Ave toya paNa caMdubhAIne ja Ave chene ! tamane zenuM Ave ? tamane kema lAge che ? praznakartA : barAbara che. dAdAzrI : ko'ka inkamaTekSavALo Avyo, hisAba hoya to ja che te bUmAbUma karene ! paNa have che te Avyo eTale tamane zuM ? e to caMdubhAIne bhAMjagaDa ! A jJAna maLyA pachI paNa keTalAka evuM kahe che, "mane hArTamAM gabharAmaNa thAya che'. je draDha thaI gayuM che ema bole che. e bhUlacUka thAya che ne enuM kAraNa zuM che ke enI pAse gRhita mithyAtva che. eTale A lokoe kahyuM ke 'A tame caMdulAla cho. tamane paiNAyA, tame pAsa thayA cho.' lokoe kahyuM, te ApaNe saMgharI rAkhyuM. have e hisAba nIkaLe che. ApaNe tarata kahI devuM ke 'huM caMdulAlane oLakhuM chuM, bhaI.' 'oLakhuM chuM' ema kahIe eTale caMdulAla samajI jAya ke 'have A koNa che te ?" vigatamAM AvI javuM joIe. AtmA thayA pachI hArTamAM zI rIte gabharAmaNa thAya tane ? tane zenI thAya A ? thAya to Ane thAya ! pADozIne thAya. paNa prekTisa pADavI paDe ke 'Avo caMdulAla, jAva caMdulAla.' Amatema moMDhe A

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) bagIcAmAM beThAM beThAM bolavuM. 'caMdulAla cA-bA pIvI che tamAre ?" Amatema vAta karIe. ko'ka to ema jANe ke gAMDo che ke zuM ? evuM ko'ka sAMbhaLe evuM nahIM. lokothI ApaNe cheTA besavuM. bolIe to abhyAsa thAya Ano. pote ADo thAya tyAre ! praznakartA : A jJAna lIdhA pachI paNa krodha Ave to e paNa DiscArja kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : krodha kone Ave che, e 'joI levuM. praznakartA : bahu vakhata Ava Ava kare to ya DiscArja kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : so vakhata Ave ke pAMcaso vakhata Ave te badhuM ya DiscArja ja kahevAya ne ! ApaNe evuM kahevuM joIe ke "caMdubhAI, bahu akaLAya akaLAya karo cho, te mAphI mAgo badhAnI.' tame kahetA nathI evuM ? bhUla to ekkekTa thaI gayelI. praznakartA : ApaNe ene bahu kahIe, caMdubhAIne ApaNe Thapako bahu ApIe to ya e ADA thAya to zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : to ADA thayA, te 'joyA' karavAnA. karavAnuM kazuM hoya nahIM. AtmAmAM karavAnI zakti ja nathI. AtmA akriya svabhAvano che ne jJAtA-draSTA-paramAnaMdI che. badhuM karavAnuM che te A pugalanuM che. je jaDa (meTara) vastu che, enI che ne kriyA badhI. praznakartA : caMdubhAI ADA thAya ane bIjAne gothuM vAgI jAya to zuM karavuM pachI ? dAdAzrI : mAphI maMgAvavI. 'ADA thaI gayA, enI mAphI mAgo" kahIe. A akrama vijJAna keTaluM suMdara che ke tamAre kazuM karavAnuM nahIM ane UlaTuM caMdubhAIne kahevAnuM, Thapako ApavAno, 'tame AnI joDe zuM karavA ciDAyA ? AvuM kema karo cho ?' kahIe. caMdubhAIne kahevuM ke 'tAruM kahyuM huM badhuM karIza paNa eka kalAka amArA kahyA pramANe raheje.' eka kalAka dAdAnI AjJAmAM rahevAnuM ne pachI caMdubhAInA kahyA pramANe karavAnuM. eneya pAchuM jovAnuM. dhyeyathI virUddha karAvatA hoya to nahIM mAnavAnuM. koI gALa de tyAre... praznakartA : jyAre koI kharAba vartana kare ne tyAre mAre zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe caMdubhAIne kahevuM, 'juone ! tamAro phoTo to juo." evuM bolyA karavuM. eTale ApaNane A kazuM aDe nahIM. caMdubhAI ThaMDA dekhAya. pelAnAM manamAM ema thAya ke A ATalI badhI ThaMDakamAM kevI rIte rahetA haze ? have koI gALa detA hoya caMdubhAIne, to ya tame to judA. tamane pelo oLakhato nathI pachI pelo tamane zI rIte gALa de ? caMdubhAIne oLakhe. caMdubhAI to tamAruM svarUpa hoya. caMdubhAI tamArAthI judA. caMdubhAI e phAIla naMbara vana eTale tamane kyAM aDe ? have aDe nahIM ? eTale 'tAre devI hoya eTalI de' kahIe ! ApaNe caMdubhAIne kahIe 'teM kaMI karyuM haze, tethI de che, nahIM to koNa devAnuM che ?" zAstrakAroe kahyuM ke jo tAruM zuddhAtmApada cUkIza nahIM to tuM mukta ja che ane cUkazo to tapa jatuM raheze. tapa to karavuM paDe. loka niMdA kare toya ApaNe tapa karavuM paDe. loko mazkarIpUrvaka hase, to ApaNeya mazkarIpUrvaka hasavuM ke, "ohoho ! caMdubhAI tame kevA mANasa cho te ! juo, A loko kevuM kahe che ! caMdubhAI, juo A tamArI dazA, loko zuM vAto kare che ! niMdAo kare che. kevA hatA tame ! evuM ameya jANIe chIe ke tame AvAM hatA." AvuM bolavAnuM hoya. akrama vijJAna enuM nAma kahevAya. baMdhAya ja nahIM pachI. ahIM tapa karavAnuM che. paNa AvI rIte chUTA rahIne bolIe eTale pachI Ane tapa rahyuM ja kyAM ? ApaNeya kahevA lAgIene ke 'caMdubhAI, joyuM tamAruM A ?! A duniyA to tamArI juo ! zuM A tamArI dazA che ! amaneya

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! da AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : ekadama enA upara gusso thAya. dAdAzrI : nA, paNa ema nahIM, paNa te ghaDIe jJAna rahe ke jatuM rahe ? praznakartA: have rahe che. dAdAzrI : e zuddhAtmA che, te caMdubhAI gusso kare tene ApaNe jovuM. praznakartA : hA, barobara. caMdubhAI kadAca gusso kare. dAdAzrI : gusse thaI jAya. kAraNa ke bharelo mAla kharo ne ! paNa tene ApaNe jovuM joIe. ane pachI caMdubhAIne kahevuM joIe ke 'zA mATe Ama karo cho ! jarA pAMsarA rahone ! anaMta avatArathI bhaTakyA cho to have sIdhA cAlo'. pachI e kahe ke cAra AnAya nahIM ApuM, to zuM kaho ? praznakartA : to 'bhogave enI bhUla' mAnIne samAdhAna karI nAMkhIe. zarama Ave che ! evuM manamAM ne manamAM caMdubhAI joDe bolIe, loka sAMbhaLe nahIM evI rIte. kaMIka khoTuM thaI gayuM hoya to gabharAmaNa thaI jAya che keTalAka mANasone, 'mArAthI AvuM thaI jAya che." alyA mUA, nA bolazo AvuM. je khoTuM kare tene kahevuM ke 'pratikramaNa kara, kema atikramaNa karyuM ?" khoTuM kare, tene nA oLakhIe ApaNe ? praznakartA : caMdubhAIne to oLakhIe. dAdAzrI : te to kAyamanA oLakhANavALA, pahelAMnA saMbaMdhavALA. 'kema khoTuM karyuM, pratikramaNa karo." eTale ApaNe chUTA enI sAbitI thaI gaI. jAgRti : lobha te mAnatI sAme ! praznakartA : zabdomAM nA mUkI zake paNa anubhava thaI gayo ne ! ApanI pAse jJAna lIdhuM ane pachI thoDA divasa pachIthI kArakhAnAmAM badhA lokoe caMdubhAIne mAryA. nahIM to caMdubhAIne mAre e caMdubhAI kaMI calAvI nA le, sAmA thaI jAya. jJAnathI samatA rahI. dAdAzrI : evuM che mAravAmAM samatA thAya, lakSmImAM thAya che ke nahIM te jovAnI jarUra. praznakartA : lakSmImAM ? paNa mAravAmAM ya jo jJAna pariNAma nA pAmyuM hoya to ahaMkAra chato thaI jAyane, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : nA, paNa e pariNAma pAmI gayuM. eTale pelo mAna kaSAya to baMdha thaI gayo. have lakSmIno kaSAya. e lobha kaSAya. e lobha kaSAyamAM che te tyAM samatA nA thAya. praznakartA : A lobha kaSAya eTale ke game teTalo phAyado agara to nukasAna thAya to paNa badhI vakhate mananI samasthiti rahe te ? dAdAzrI : e to rahe. paNa vyaktigata eka mANasane tame paccIsa hajAra ApyA che ane e avaLuM bole to tamane zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : tarata ja ? praznakartA : hA. evA lIdhA haze to e nathI Apato. dAdAzrI : to e lobha kaSAya UDyo. lobha kaSAya gayo. praznakartA: bAkI Ama lobha kaSAya UDavo bahu kaThaNa che. dAdAzrI : kaThaNa che paNa tamAruM DahApaNa nA karo to A jJAna bilakula cokkasa rAkhe evuM che. eka lAkha bAkI hoya ane eka Anoya nA Ape to ya ApaNuM moTuM bagaDavuM nA joIe. moDhuM bagADyuM to khalAsa thaI gayuM ! praznakartA : dasa lAkha rUpiyA levAnA hoya ane enI aMdarathI pachIthI be-traNa lAkha rUpiyA gayA hoya to to karoLiyAno eka paga gayo, paNa dasa lAkhane badale bAra lAkhanI jyAre khoTa AvI hoya to... dAdAzrI : aDhAra lAkhanI Ave to ya zuM?

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga : AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : tyAre rahevuM joIe. dAdAzrI : acAvIsa lAkhanI Ave to ya zuM ?' praznakartA : pachI to pAMca karoDa hoya to ya sarakhuM ja che ne, ene ApavAnA nathI eTale ! dAdAzrI : ApaNe caMdubhAIne eTaluM ja kahevAnuM ke 'caMdubhAI, ApavuM che evo nizcaya toDazo nahIM. jyAre Ave tyAre ApavuM che evuM nakkI rAkhajo." ane enuM hoya, te ene maLyA vagara rahetuM nathI ane nA hoya tyAre mAra khAya. praznakartA : bahu moTI vAta kahI. enuM haze to ene maLavAnuM ja. dAdAzrI : ene maLavAnuM ja che. badho hisAba che A to. mana bagaDyuM ke kharAba thayuM, mana bagaDe ne eTale evuM kahe, 'polIsa kesa karIza ne Ama karIza, tema karIza', ema karIne pelA pAse pAMca-daza hajAra paDAvI le. to AmaNe A je guno karyo, te pachI A daMDa bhogavavo paDaze. eTale guno thAya ja nahIM. zAMtithI javA devuM paDe, meM to AkhI jiMdagI AvuM karyuM che. jo mokSa joIto hoya to lobha ane mAna be bilakula nA hovA joIe. ta koIno dhaNI AtmA ! praznakartA : hajI paisA mATe jarA bhAMjagaDa thAya che. dararoja savAra paDI eTale gharamAM pahelI carcA thAya che ke A kharcA vadhatA jAya che, eTale Avaka vadhavI joIene ! dAdAzrI : hA, paNa e caMdubhAI kakaLATa kare che ne tame nathI karatAMne ! praznakartA : hA, caMdubhAI kare che. dAdAzrI : caMdubhAI to enA dhaNI thaI beThA chene ! koInA chokarA thaI beThA cho, nahIM ?! koInA bApe ya thayA hazone ?! ane tame to koInA bApe nahIM thayA, koInA dhaNI nahIM, evA tame nirlepa kahevAo. samaya veDaphAya tyAre ! praznakartA : dhaMdhAmAM ne badhe AvI badhI kSullaka vAtomAM, nirarthaka vAtomAM dhyAna ane samaya ghaNo bagaDe che. dAdAzrI : vagara kAmanI vAta, kAma vagaranAM valoNAM valova valova karyA kare. paNa koI dA'Do tame kahyuM, ke 'caMdubhAI, A khoTo vakhata zuM karavA bagADe che, vagara kAmano ?' praznakartA : hA, paNa e to be kalAka gayA pachI kahyuM, pachI to ekAda pratikramaNa karI laIe. dAdAzrI ane pratikramaNane nA gAMThe to ApaNe ema kahevuM, 'he caMdubhAI, besa sAmo. jo A vakhata bagADe che amathA, te tArA hAthamAM zuM AvyuM ? bola.' to tarata enI meLe ThekANe AvI jAya. kaMI caMdubhAI abhaNa che ? bhaNelo mANasa che ! bosa vaDhe tyAre .... have bosa che te caMdubhAIne vaDhe, tamane zI rIte vaDhe ? tamane e oLakhe kaMI ? caMdulAlane vaDhe, te ApaNe caMdulAlane bosa vaDhI gayA pachI, ophIsamAM jaIne kahevuM ke 'tame kaMI bolyA hazo tethI ja kahetA haze ne ! zAMti rAkhone jarA !' kahevAya ke nA kahevAya ? ane bosa laDe ke nA laDe, A jamAnAmAM ? praznakartA : laDe. dAdAzrI : enI bAIDI joDe laDIne Avyo, temAM ApaNI para akaLAmaNa kare. evuM nA bane ? ApaNI bhUla nA hoya to ya vaDhe ? caMdubhAIne ApaNe "jANyA' karavAnuM. ophisanuM kAma kevuM kare che, kevuM nahIM te ApaNe jANIe" ne pachI emane kahevuMya kharuM, ke 'AvuM zA hAru karo cho ? puruM kAma karone !' kahevAmAM zuM vAMdho ? bolavAmAM zuM vAMdho ApaNe ? khAlI eDajasTamenTa ja che, nahIM to ya bIjuM kazuM vaLe nahIM. AvuM paNa bolIe to aMdhAdhUMdhI nA phelAya.

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! praznakartA : A jJAtA-draSTA rahIe te vakhate, A barAbara rahe che ke nathI rahetA caMdubhAI, e DipharanzIeTa rAkhavuM ke nA rAkhavuM ? 67 dAdAzrI : caMdubhAI rahe ke nA rahe, tenI sAthe ApaNe levA-devA nathI. ApaNe rahevAyuM ke nahIM, e jovAnuM che. caMdubhAI rahe ke nA ya rahe, DipholTare ya thAya, ene ApaNe levA-devA nathI have. todhArAM, thayA sAdhAra... gADI upaDI muMbaIthI ane vacce nonasTopa che, pachI zI bhAMjagaDa ? jarA dhImI cAlaze, to ya paNa pahoMcavAnI che. A to AvyuM jANone ! tamAre taiyArI karI rAkho have badhI. mahIMthI evuM kahe ke AvyuM. tame zuddhAtmA ane A caMdubhAI. tame be thayA. ekanA be thayA. have tamAre caMdubhAInI dekharekha rAkhavAnI, pADozInI peThe ane caMdubhAIne muzkelI AvI jAya to ApaNe caMdubhAIno khabho ThokI Apavo ke ame chIene tamArI joDe. pahelAM ekalA hatA, nodhArAM hatA. have sAdhAra thayA. pahelAM to nodhArAM hatA. konI pAse raDavuM ? vahu pAse 2DIe to vahu avaLuM samajI jAya, mAbApa pAse to raDAya nahIM ! praznakartA : have koI bolAve to pachI bolavuM ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : e to bolavAnuM. vyavahArathI badhuM karavAnuM, ApaNe jANyA karIe. ApaNe kahevuM, 'caMdubhAI, A bhaI joDe jarA bolo have, vAtacIta karone kaMIka.' eTale e bole ya kharA. ane vyavahAra cAlyA kare. tamAre 'joyA' karavAnuM. pelAne khabara nA paDe, ApaNe zuM karIe chIe ! paNa tame ene 'joyA' karo, caMdubhAI zuM kare che te ! jJAtA-draSTA. bannenA svabhAva judA thayA. have AtmA AtmAnA svabhAvamAM raheze ane pudgala pudgalanA svabhAvamAM raheze. potapotAnA guNadharmamAM rahe che. chUTuM rAkhavA, samajI levuM Ama ! eTale caMdubhAInuM vyavasthita zakti badhuM calAve che. tyAre tamAre to e joyA ja karavAnuM, caMdubhAI zuM kare che ne zuM nahIM ? mana-buddhi AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) citta ne ahaMkAra, emAM kazAmAM ApaNe hAtha ghAlavAnI jarUra nahIM. e buddhi zuM karI rahI che te joyA karavAnuM. ADuM karatI hoya te ya ApaNe joyA karavAnuM, khoTuM ke sAruM karatI hoya te ya joyA karavAnuM. paNa tyAM ApaNe hAtha kyAre ghAlavAno ke caMdubhAIne sAMsArika bahu muzkelI AvI gaI hoya, tyAre ApaNe 'huM zuddhAtmA ja chuM. huM tamArI joDe chuM.' ema kahIe eTale olarAITa thaI jaze. sAMsArika muzkelIo Ave hAthanIpaganI, bahu muzkelI thatI hoya te ghaDIe chone thAya, huM chuM ne, gabharAzo nahIM.' kahIe ane nahIM to bahu zarIrane kaMI aDacaNa thatI hoya to 'mAruM nhoya' ema kaho ke chUTuM rahe. kAraNa ke lAIna oNpha DimArkezana pADI che. A tamAruM ne A tamAruM nhoya, evuM badhuM. eTale Ane regyulara korsamAM jarA samajI levAnI jarUra che. A bhUlazo nahIMne, huM boluM chuM te ? mokSa te AcArane nathI levA-devA ! darekane kaMI 'A' brahmacarya vrata levAnI jarUra hotI nathI. A to badhuM samabhAve nikAla karavA jevuM che ! paNa 'emAM' jo ruci vadhatI hoya to ApaNe kahevuM ke 'caMdubhAI, AmAM bahu rucie nA caDhazo !' AvuM tevuM tamAre kahevuM. paNa tamAre to zuddhAtmAmAM ja rahevuM. caMdubhAInuM game tevuM thAya paNa tamAre to caMdubhAI joDe vAtocItono vyavahAra ja karI nAkhavo. Avo vyavahAra judo rAkhazo to liphaTa mArga jaladI phAyadAkAraka thaze ! ane ame vyavahAra judo pADI Apyo che ane te judo vartAI zake evo che ! caMdubhAIe ADuMavaLuM karyuM hoya, te ene kahevuM paDe ke 'AvuM karazo, te amane poSAze nahIM. ame to zuddhAtmA thayA, paNa AvuM ADuMavaLuM cAlaze nahIM. tamAre paNa zuddha thavuM paDaze.' AvuM bolIene eTale kudaratI rIte enI meLe zuddha thayA karaze ! tame jo vyavahAra judo rAkho to zuddha ja che ! je mANasa vyavahAra judo rAkhato hoya e mANasa game te AcAra karato hoya toya eno mokSa thaI javAno che ! tyAM AgaLa AcArane levAdevA nathI ! caMdubhAIne to 'Ama kema karo cho' evuM kahevAnuM eTale vyavahArathI judA thaI gayA ke tame zuddhAtmA ane A caMdubhAI judA ! 68

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) thAbaDIe. jANe kazuM ya nahIM. te dukhatuM ya maTI jAya. kAraNa ke dahADo to Thelavavo paDaze ne ? kaMI bairI joDe vaDhavADa karIe, emAM dahADo vaLe ? AtmA vRttione zuM kahe che ke "caMdubhAI, tamAre jo tamAruM karavuM hoya to tame judA ane huM judo. ane jo tamAre mArI joDe ekatA karavI hoya to je joItuM hoya te maLaze. kAyamanuM sukha maLaze. ane ekatA nA karavI hoya to tamAruM sukha bahArathI khoLo." ApaNe zuddhAtmA, e ApaNuM svarUpa che ane paramAnaMdI svarUpa che. iTarnala sukha che ! pelAM sukha e sukha ja nA kahevAyane ? A sukha to jAya ja nahIM. ane koI gALo deto hoyane to ya mahIMthI sukha jAya nahIM. ThapakAro caMdute, judo rAkhIne ! A hamaNe khaMbhAta gayA hatA. te eka bhaIne kahyuM ke bhaI, 'dAdA bhagavAnanA asIma jaya jayakAra' bolo. te bolavA mAMDyo. bole kharo paNa utsAha nahIM. utsAha nA dekhAya. tyAre meM kahyuM, 'tuM ema kara, zuM sAruM nAma ?" caMdu. eTale tuM caMdune kahe ke 'paddhatasara bolo. AvuM goTALiyuM nahIM cAle.' evuM kahevaDAvIne pachI bolAvyuM. sarasa bolyo, evuM sarasa bolyo, kharekharuM TheTha sudhI. te A ja rIta che, bIjuM kazuM nahIM. tamAre phakta kahevuM joIe. 'Ama kema thAya che ? na thavuM joIe.' cAlyuM gADuM. A to koI kahenAra ja nahIMne ! koI nA hoya to ApaNe to kharA. pachI kazuM the DojhIMga rahe ? ko'ka kahe te ApaNane game nahIM. enA karatAM ApaNe kahIe te zuM khoTuM ? have vAta tamAre kahevAnI. tamane samaja paDI gaIne ? praznakartA : hA, dAdA. dAdAzrI : eTale A phakta eka ja phero kahene, "are caMdubhAI, tame AvaDA moTA pI.eca.DI. thaIne A te kaMI zuM bolo cho !" evI ja rIte basa emane kahevuM. kAraNa ke e jANe che ke A judA che ane ApaNe yu jANIe che A judA che. paNa pachI judAI rAkhatA nathI. AvuM rAkho. judAI nA rAkhavI joIe ? pachI ApaNA kahyA pramANe cAle che ke nahIM te jovuM. tame kahI to jojo, A huM dAkhalA kahuM chuM tyAM. ame to paTelane kahIe, 'bahu paga phATyA che, nahIM ? haze A, AjanI rAta ja che ne paNa ame chIe ne tamArI joDe.' Ama karIne khabho pratikramaNathI tUTe abhiprAya praznakartA : jJAna lIdhA pachI vRttio badhI potAnA ghara tarapha vaLane ? have dAdA, mane to ene ahIMyAM AvuM tyAre kaMI AnA sivAya bIjA vicAra nathI AvatA ane bahAra jauM to pachI badhA bahAranA ja vicAra Ave. kapaDAMnA, bUTanAM, khAvAnA ja... dAdAzrI : e to mananuM kArya che, te ApaNe jovAnuM. praznakartA : mahIM icchApUrvaka inTaresTa paDI jAya evuM thAya che. dAdAzrI : inTaresTa to caMdubhAIne paDe teya ApaNe joyuM ane caMdubhAIne ApaNe kahevuM ke 'bhaI, ATaluM badhuM zuM sukha AmAM kADhavAnuM che? zA sukha kADhavAnA che ?" inTaresTa to paDI jAyane ! inTaresTa to dehane AdhIna chene e. te caMdubhAIne inTaresTa paDe ! kharAM sukha sivAya bIjo kalpita sukha, badhAM nA gamatAM ApaNe karavAnA kharA, ApaNe jovAnuM ke "AmAM zuM majA che ?" evuM tevuM kahevAnuM caMdubhAIne. praznakartA : dAdA, pachIthI evuM lAge ke zuM majA che ! paNa te vakhate bhUlI javAya che. dAdAzrI : nA, paNa bhUlI ja javAya che. karmano udaya che ne ! eTale sahuthI sArAmAM sAro Ano upAya ke phAIla naMbara ekane 'kema che, kema nahIM' e vAto karavAthI e jAya. zuM kahevuM joIe ? praznakartA : niraMtara enI sAthe vAta karIne ene kahe kahe karavuM joIe ke A tame sAruM nA karyuM. aNI kema cUkI jAva cho ? dAdAzrI : evuM kahevAya. eTale sudhI kahevAya.

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) thaI gayuM UMcAmAM UMcuM. kAraNa ke puruSArtha sahita chane A ? ane pote potAnA puruSArthamAM che. eTale aMdara zukladhyAna ne bahAra dharmadhyAna. koI ahaMkAra Tubhave, tyAM.. praznakartA : ghaNI vakhata koI AkSepa mUke tyAre ahaMkAra dubhAya, ahaMkArane Thesa vAge, tyAre potAne dubhAya, sAmAthI potAne dubhAya enI vAta karuM chuM. praznakartA : ke ATaluM badhuM jJAna samajo cho pachI TAImane vakhate kema cUkI jAva cho ? dAdAzrI : eTaluM kahevAya. pAchA pharI pharI jo A cUkI jAya to pAchuM kahevAnuM ane pratikramaNa karavAnuM. pazcAtApa to karavo ja paDe, nahIM to pachI A kharuM hatuM evuM mAnI le. pratikramaNa eTale ApaNo abhiprAya tUTyo A bAbatamAM ke AvuM nA ho. A sAcuM che ane A khoTuM che e abhiprAya tUTI gayo ApaNo. pote potAnI joDe ya satsaMga ! praznakartA : dAdI maLyA pachI dhAro ke koI vAra evuM bane ke koI satsaMgI nA maLe to ApaNe pote caMdubhAIne kahevAya che ke cAlo caMdubhAI, ApaNe satsaMga karIe ? dAdAzrI : badhuM kahevAya. caMdubhAIne oLakhatA thayA, ene zuM nA kahevAya ?! caMdubhAInI oLakhANa paDI ke haju caMdubhAI che joDe, pachI rahyuM ja nahIMne kazuM ! praznakartA: have ekalA caMdubhAI satsaMga kare e sAruM ke badhA ghaNA bhegA thaIne satsaMga kare e sAruM ! dAdAzrI : amane to ekalA kare ke badhA bhegA kare, caMdubhAInI joDe vAta kare eTale thaI gayuM. satsaMga cAlu thaI gayo. caMdubhAInI joDe vAta karavI, enuM nAma ja satsaMga. satsaMgamAM bhaLI javuM badhAM joDe ! ApaNA satsaMgamAM bIjA badhAM je kare e pramANe potAnI jAtane joInTa (bhegAM) karI de, to UMcAmAM UMcuM rahe e sthAna ! badhAM karatAM hoya, tenI mahIM pote joInTa thaI jAya. 'caMdubhAI, tame 'joInTa" thaI jAva emAM' ema kahe kahe karavAnuM. tyAre kahe, 'badhA gAya che." tyAre kahIe, 'gAva'. badhA thabAkA pADe che. tyAre kahIe, 'thabAkA pADo'. eTale dAdAzrI : e to leTa go karavo. ApaNo jo ahaMkAra dubhAya to to sAruM UlaTuM, ApaNAthI eno ahaMkAra dubhAya to tenI javAbadArI ApaNA upara. paNa A to UlaTuM sAruM, mahIM moTAmAM moTuM tophAna maTayuM ! praznakartA : toya ApaNane mahIM e badhI samajaNa hoya ke A ahaMkAra dubhAya che evuMya khyAla hoya, paNa toya e ghavAyelo ahaMkAra duHkha Ape. dAdAzrI : e dubhAve tyAre jANavuM ke Aja bahu napho thayo. praznakartA : dAdA, evuM badhuM nA rahe. dAdAzrI : e to raheze, nahIM rahe to pachI raheze. jyAre tyAre to evuM raheze ja ne ! atyAre tamane Teva nathI eTale nathI rahetuM. cA kaDavI pIvAnI Teva nathIne, eTale pachI e jyAre kaheze ke oho ! A to eno sarasa TesTa che, cA jevI che, to sAruM lAgaze. A to pIdhI nathIne kaDavI eTale pahelethI nA phAve pIvAnuM. kAraNa ke ahaMkAra dubhave te to sAruM. mana dubhave te to, emAM bahu napho nA maLe. ahaMkAra dubhave e to bahu naphAvALuM. ApaNe koIno ahaMkAra dubhavIe to e bahu khoTa thaI kahevAya. ApaNe che te khoTa che, ene kADhavAnI chene ! nA samajaNa paDI tamane ? praznakartA : Apa kaho cho e badhuM evuM samajaNamAM che, paNa toya peluM dukhyA kare. e nA dukhe enA mATe zuM karavAnuM?

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! 73 4 dAdAzrI : e to eTaluM bhoga bhogavavAnuM karma lakheluM. azAtAvedanIya bhogavavAnI hoyane, to thayA kare. te e bhogavavAne ApaNe jANavuM ke A bhogave che. ApaNe mahIM rasa lIdho ke karma coMTe ! praznakartA: rasa lIdho eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : "A mane kema AvuM thAya che, mane kema AvuM thAya che ! AvuM kema kare e ?!' e rasa lIdho kahevAya. AvuM Ave to bahu guNakArI mAnavuM ke ohoho, Aja bahu moTAmAM moTI khoTa bhAMgI ! praznakartA : A chene dAdA, A badhA bahAranA eDajasTamenTa che, ke tAro bahu upakAra che ke mAre khoTa gaI, bahu sAruM thayuM, bhaluM thajo. dAdAzrI : hA. e eDajasTamenTa thAya to ja aMdaranA eDajasTamenTa thAya, nahIM to aMdaranA eDajasTamenTa thAya nahIMne ! bahAranuM eDajasTamenTa laIe eTale aMdaranuM solyuzana thaI jAya. praznakartA : e bahAra badhA eDajasTamenTa to khabara hoya, paNa e pachI amuka ja rIte kAma Ape, pachI buTTA thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : te Ama zarUAta karatAM karatAM pachI bilakula khalAsa thaI jAya. haju pelo inTaresTa eTale peluM sahana nA thAya. rasa paDI jAya nahIM. praznakartA : sahana nA thAya evuM nahIM, bIjAne khabara paDe ke nA ya paDe, paNa potAne mahIM ahaMkAra dukhyA kare. dAdAzrI : te dukhe te ja 'jovAnuM'ne ApaNe. vadhAre dukhe e sAruM. napho bahu sarasa thayo. tyAM duHkhIne khalAsa ja karavAnone ! e to bilakula naphA-khoTa vagarano ja thaI javAnone ! khoTe nahIM ne naphoya nahIM, to bahu sAruM kahevAya. praznakartA: Ama hakIkata che ke khAlI AzvAsana ApavA mATe che ? ahaMkArane AvuM kahIe to e kahe ke A badhA AzvAsana che. dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM che ?! AzvAsana nA hoya to bIjuM zuM ApIe ?! AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : soliDa joIe che ene to. dAdAzrI : soliDa ja chene ! ApaNe caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'tamAre levuM hoya to lyo, nahIM to ame to A rahyA ! tamArI khoTa tamane vadhaze, amAre zuM vAMdho ?" eTale A ja AzvAsana, tyAre bIjuM zuM kahevAya ? ApaNe kaMI enA sAmuM jhera pIe ? ene pIvuM hoya to pIve. ame to A badhuM jagata joI nAkheluM AvuM. mane to UlaTuM AnaMda thAya AvuM Ave to. praznakartA : solyuzana nathI maLatuM. zuM pUchuM ? mane joIe evuM nathI maLatuM. dAdAzrI : nA, e nahIM maLe to enI meLe ja ThekANe Avaze. praznakartA : enI meLe ThekANe Avaze ema to kaMI nA kahevAya, dAdA. enI meLe ThekANe Avaze e to kevI rIte ? eno to kaMI artha ja nahIMne? e to besI rahevAnuMne ? dAdAzrI : besI rahevuM e ja uttama. ene 'joyA' karavAnuM. praznakartA : paNa mahIM ahaMkAra baLyA kare tenuM zuM ? dAdAzrI : jema baLe tema ocho thato jAya. ApaNe badhuM ochuM ja karavuM che ne ! lAkaDuM bALI nAkhavuM che, temAM jeTaluM badhuM eTaluM ochuM. bIjuM baLatuM hoya to sAruM UlaTuM. 'joyA' karavuM. bALavAnuM ja che ne ! praznakartA : paNa thoDuM pote mahIM pachI baLavA mAMDe... peluM baLatuM hoya tyAre pachI enI jhALa potAne lAgene, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : e jhALa lAge te ApaNe jANavuM joIene ke bhaI, AvaDo moTo bhaDako thayelo te jhALa lAge. khasI javuM jhALa lAge eTale. kAraNa ke AtmA evo che ene jhALa aDatI ja nathI. e manamAM mAne ke mane jhALa aDI, e to khoTuM che. aDI evuM dekhAya kharI, paNa ene sparza nathI karatI. ene duHkha nathI ApatI. ene ema lAge ke mane

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75 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! bALI melyo. paNa kazuM aDe nahIM evo AtmA che. so TakA geranTI enI. Avo sarasa AtmA Apyo pachI AvI badhI vAta ja kyAM rahI te ?! ApaNe jeTalI khoTa khaIe eTalI jAya. praznakartA : dAdA, je AtmA Apyo che ne, eno pUrepUro anubhava Ama kevI rIte Akho divasa rahe ? AzA hoya nahIM AtmAne. A to kaMI eka ja kalAkamAM badhI khoTa jAya ? anaMta avatAranI khoTa, be-traNa avatAra jazene. A pahelAM to lAkha avatAreya nA jAya. e dAdAnA jJAnathI ATaluM saraLa thaI paDyuM. te UlaTuM dAdAnA jJAnanuM e bolavuM joIe ke dhanyabhAgya ! mane A jJAna prApta thayuM ane dAdA bhegA thayA. praznakartA : evuM nathI rahetuM. have evuM lAge che, have evuM rahe che ke ApaNe keTalA hatabhAgI chIe ke AvA dAdA maLyA toya kAma kADhI letA nathI AvaDatuM. dAdAzrI : haM, dAdA maLyA to kAma kADhI levAnuM. pharI kaMI A to jovAnAya nahIM maLe. dAdAzrI : hA. paNa avaLo raheto hato, te savaLo rahevA mAMDyo eTale ApaNe pUchI pUchIne AgaLa cAlavA mAMDIene ! peluM pAMcasonI khoTavALuM hoya te nikAla AvI gayo paNa jemAM pAMca hajAranI khoTa gaI hoya e vAra lAge, te ApaNe joyA ja karavuM paDene ! praznakartA : barAbara che. dAdAzrI : jenA upara bhAva hato, tenI upara ja abhAva karavAno che. eTale abhAva raheto hoya to ApaNe jANavuM ke ahIM bhAva bahu raheto hato, tenuM ApaNane kaDavuM maLe che. e pakSamAM besIe eTale samajAya nahIM. svataMtra thavuM hoya to e badhuM samajI javAya evuM che. enA pakSane ApaNe kAma ja zuM che ? nahIM levA, nahIM devA. praznakartA : dAdA, chUTavuM che, chUTAtuM nathI. dAdAzrI : baLyuM chUTavuM che, chUTAtuM nathI te e to tame jANo chone. to enI meLe ja dhIme dhIme ApaNe enI pAchaLa karyA karazo to chUTI jaze. ApaNe jANavuM joIe ke ahIM AgaLa A paTTI coMTelI te ukhaDatI nathI. pANI copaDIe, bIjuM copaDIe, ema karatAM karatAM ukhaDaze. ukhaDyA vagara chUTako ja nathIne ! praznakartA H to AzA rAkhIne besI rahevAnuM ? dAdAzrI : AzA rAkhavAnI ja nahIM. besI rahevAnuM ja nahIM. ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM chUTatuM nathI te. AzA vaLI koNe rAkhavAnI ? nA calAvI lene, to e khoTa che te pUrI thaI jaze. enI meLe ja pUrI thaze. paNa ApaNe dAdAnI pAchaLa emanI AjJA pALI ke ApaNuM kAma ja thaI javAnuM. eno vicAreya karazo nahIM. khoTa keTalI te jovAnI nahIM, ApaNe to AjJA kema karIne paLAya ane ApaNe AjJA bhUlAya nahIM eTaluM ja. AmAM te zuM khoTa vaLI ! ahaMkAra bhagna thaI jAya to zuM karavuM ? jabarajasta ahaMkAra toDI nAMkhe to ? AjubAju zastrothI ghA UMDo kare, paNa AtmAne anaMta zakti che eTale anaMta zaktivALo chuM, tAre je karavuM hoya te karyA kara ne ! ApaNe haTha laIne besavAnuM. tapa karavAnuM. anaMta zaktivALo chuM. eTale pachI dhIme dhIme ochAM thaI jAya pote ja. ane ToLAM ochAM thAya. eTale pachI pachI enuM baLa tUTI gayuM. mArI hAjarImAM badhuMya tUTI jaze. zakti bahu jabarajasta chene ! amArI hAjarImAM badhuM tUTI jAya. praznakartA : ApanI hAjarImAM je A nizcaya karyo che, e ApanI hAjarImAM ja pUro karavo che. dAdAzrI : pUro thaI jaze basa basa ! tamane to ema lAgaze ke A to bahu zakti vadhI.

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! 8 praznakartA: hA, dAdA. e pahelAM karatAM inTensiTI e ghaTI gaI che. pahelAM jeTalI tIvratAthI vicAra AvatA hatA evI tIvratA have nathI rahetI. dAdAzrI : hA, basa. e to enI meLe UDI jAya. ApaNe sTroMga rahIene eTale koI bIjuM kazuM naDe nahIM ane AtmAnI anaMta zakti che, ethI koI zaktivAna bIjo vizeSa che ja nahIM. pachI bIjA zuM karavAnA hatA ? ane che nyuTrala. nathI strI jAti, nathI puruSa jAti. praznakartA : barAbara che. pahelAM jevI mahIMthI have icchApUrvaka sahI nathI thatI have. dAdAzrI : nA thAya. e ja moTAmAM moTuM Azcaryane ! tene lIdhe A zakti chene, jabarajasta zakti tenI ja che. nahIM to rahetI haze ke, eka dahADo UDI gayuM eTale khalAsa. praznakartA : akrama vijJAna sivAya banI zake evuM nathI A. dAdAzrI : nA barobara ! 'huM anaMta zaktivALo chuM' kahI devuM. 'huM anaMta zaktivALo chuM' ema karIne haThe caDavuM pachI tapa ja karavuM, basa. e Aro AvI gayo. praznakartA : barAbara che. dAdAzrI : vicAra Ave, to koI vicAra mahatvano hoto nathI. jyAM sudhI e vicAra enI meLe cAle tyAM sudhI cAlavA devo. nA cAle ne pAcho mokale to pAcho vALI devo. e pramANe ja hoya che vyavasthita. zuM bane che e ja karekTa. eTale bIjI bhAMjagaDamAM nahIM paDavAnuM. 'huM anaMta zaktivALo' kahyuM ke badhuM baMdha thaI gayuM. game tevuM hoya toya 'anaMta zaktivALo chuM" eTale ukela AvI gayo. AtmAnI zakti pAra vagaranI che. akrama vijJAnanI ajAyabI ! jo tame AtmA thaIne raho cho to badhA karmanI nirjarA che ne AtmA thaIne nathI rahetA, te jarAka DakharAyAM ke e karmanA jarAka kaMIka DAgha paDaze. kAraNa ke je che e mAnyatA nathI tamArI, bhUgla thAya che tyAM. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : svapadamAMthI parapadamAM khasI jAya ? dAdAzrI : nA, khasI jatuM nathI. parapadamAM jatuM nathI. paNa enA manamAM ema thAya che ke "A koNa che te ? mArI ja bhUla che ne A ?" paNa te "mArI bhUla' to kyAre ? jyAM sudhI "ApaNe" "caMdubhAI hatA, tyAM sudhI bhUla hatI. have to 'ApaNe' 'zuddhAtmA' thayA. zuddhAtmA to evI bhUlavALo che ja nahIM. eTale bahu e thAya to ApaNe kahevuM ke, 'caMdubhAI, ohoho, bahu bhUlo karI che. bhAre karI che.' tenAthI e zuM thaI jAya che ? e ApaNe bolIe ne, e ja chUTApaNuM darzAve che ane 'tamArI' javAbadArI enuM thAya tyAM AgaLa ! ApaNuM jJAna to kevuM che ke koI kahe ke tame amAruM ghaDiyALa corI gayA. tyAre kahIe ke 'bhAI, ghaDiyALa corI gayo tamane je lAge e kharuM.' ApaNe AtmasvarUpa thaIne javAba ApavAnA. pachI te ghaDIe tame caMdubhAI thaI jAva, pAchuM AtmA Apelo jato rahe. eTale ApaNA ekrama vijJAnamAM A upAdhi che. praznakartA : upAdhi hovA chatAM ya jAgRti te vakhate keLavAtI jAya. jAgRti keLavavA mATeno A mArga che. dAdAzrI : hA. jAgRti ekadama vadhI jAya. jAgRti to bahu UMcI jatI rahe. jAgRti to bahu vadhe che. paNa vastusthitimAM atyAre jarAka saheja Dakho raheto hoya to tarata svIkArI le che. 'meM kyAM corI karI che ?" alyA, rakSaNa zuM karavA karo cho te ? tAruM nathI, tenuM tuM rakSaNa zuM karavA kare che ? je tArI vAta ja nathI, tenuM rakSaNa tAre karavAnI jarUra nathI. svIkArI laIe pachI ApaNI bhUla kahevAyane ? pachI ene khabara paDI jAya ke ApaNI bhUla thaI gaI. pachI khabara paDe paNa eTalI jAgRti to che. - A jJAna ja mokSe laI jAya evuM che. paNa tamArI jAgRtithI ene bahu helpa karavI joIe pachI, puruSArtha karavo joIe. puruSa thayA pachI puruSArtha hoya. prakRti ne puruSa be judA thayA. jyAM sudhI tame "caMdubhAI' hatA, tyAM sudhI prakRti hatI. te prakRti jema nacAve tema tame nAcatA hatA.

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judApaNuM vartAvavA, vAtacItano prayoga ! 79 tame puruSa thayA ne prakRti judI thaI gaI. puruSa thayA pachI puruSArtha utpanna thAya. puruSArthamAM e jAgRti to che ja. puruSArthamAM to phakta bIjuM zuM ? ApaNe nakkI karavuM joIe. sthiratApUrvaka badhI vAtacIta karavI joIe. praznakartA : Ano artha e thayo ke A khoTuM ke sAcuM, eno Agraha nahIM rAkhavo. dAdAzrI : khoTuM-sAcuM to jANe che ja nahIM. e to Agraha rAkhavAno ja nathI. paNa ApaNe koI dahADo cAkheluM nahIM. ane tamane kahe ke tame corI karI eTale sAMbhaLeluM nahIM ne koI dahADo prekTisa nahIM thayelIne, ekadama sAMbhaLavAnuM thAya tyAM AgaLa zuM thAya ? eTale imozanala thAya. eTale ApaNe caMdubhAIne kahyuM ke, 'bhaI, cora ja cho. ko'ka cora kahe to gabharAzo nahIM.' evuM pahelethI ApaNe kahI rAkhavuM paDe. hA, 'koI kahe to gabharAzo nahIM. koI dhola mAre to ya gabharAzo nahIM* evuM ApaNe kahI rAkhIe. nahIM to pachI ko'ka dhola nA mAre ne amatho amatho Ama Ama kare to ya che te asara thaI jAya. eTale evI prekTisa pADI rAkhavI paDe. evuM riharsala karAvI rAkhavuM. nA karAvavuM paDe ? karAvI rAkheluM sAruM. ko'ka phero muzkelI Ave te ghaDIe, riharsala kareluM phaLa Ape. nahIM to A jJAna to badhAM, ghaNAMkharAMne, keTalAMya mANasone samAdhi Ape che niraMtara ! [1.4] tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? na thAya AtmA tanmayAkAra kadI ! praznakartA : dAdA yAda rahe paNa keTalIka vakhata A pravRttiomAM rahIe tyAre tanmayAkAra thaI javAya. dAdAzrI : tanmayAkAra thAya teno vAMdho nahIM. tanmayAkAra thAya te tanmayAkAra 'tame' nathI thatA, e to A 'caMdubhAI" thAya che, paNa tamane ema lAge che ke "huM" thaI gayo eTaluM ja. tamAre jANavuM joIe ke caMdubhAI tanmayAkAra thaIne cA pIve che. eTaluM tamAre jANavAnuM. tame tanmayAkAra thatA hoya to tamane khabara paDe nahIM. tanmayAkAra thaI gayA cho evI khabara kone paDI ? 'tamane to khabara paDe che. eTale tame tanmayAkAra thatA nathI. praznakartA : to A pudgala thAya che ? dAdAzrI : pudgalamAM amuka evuM baLa che. evo moTo heDa, te thaI jAya che. koI phero ahaMkAra tanmayAkAra thAya, koI phero buddhi tanmayAkAra thAya paNa tame nahIM. tanmayAkAra thAya evI khabara zI rIte paDI ? mATe tame 'jANo cho e badhuM. A UlaTuM tamArI jAtane mAno cho ke A huM tanmayAkAra thayo. nA, tema nathI thatA.

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : tanmayAkAra thatI vakhate nA khyAla Ave ke huM tanmayAkAra thayo. paNa pachI khyAla Ave. dAdAzrI : pachI khyAla Ave to ya vAMdho nahIM. e to peluM jora bahu eTale. peluM jora ochuM thAya eTale pachI jAgRti Avaze. jora bahu eTalo ocho khyAla Ave. ApaNe sTezana upara TikiTa ApatA hoIe ane bahu mANasa AvyuM ne dhamapachADA karatuM hoya te ghaDIe ApaNane jarA kaMTALo Ave. paNa A dhamapachADA hamaNe ochAM thaI jaze. tuM TikiTa kApa kApa karyA karane ! pachIthI majA Avaze. A to phorsa che. pelA halakAM karmamAM tamane nathI thatuM evuM. bhAre karmano phorsa hoya tyAre thaI jAya che. eTale keTalAMkane dhaMdhAnI bAbatamAM thaI jAya, keTalAMkane viSayanI bAbatamAM thaI jAya. eTale viSayanI bAbatamAM phAIla hoya to pachI cha mahinAnuM brahmacarya vrata levuM joIe. to jAgRti rahe. praznakartA H tanmayAkAra thaI javAya to jAgRtino abhAva samajavo ke zuM samajavuM ? dAdAzrI : jAgRtino abhAva nathI. jAgRti to tyAM che ja. jAgRti to che, tamArA karmanuM udayabaLa jabarajasta che, phorsa che. aDadho iMcanI pAIpamAMthI pANI AvatuM hoya tyAM sudhI AMgaLI rahe ane phorsathI doDha icanA pAIpamAMthI Ave to AMgaLI khasI jAya. evo phorsa che karmano. pachI e phorsa thoDo ocho thaI jAya eTale pAchI AMgaLI rahe. jAgRti to niraMtara hoya che ja. paNa jeTaluM AvI rIte thayuM. te phAIlo pharI tamAre nikAla karavI paDaze. jAgRtinI hAjarI sivAya je phAIlo gaI, te phAIlono pAcho pharI jAgRtipUrvaka nikAla karavo paDaze. eTale sekanDa TAIma Avaze. A bhavamAM ne A bhavamAM AvyA kare. jAgRti to niraMtara rahevAnI. praznakartA : A lakSa tarata AvI jAya che, paNa Ama miniTeminiTe lakSa nathI rahetuM. dAdAzrI : e to caMdubhAI tanmaya thaI jAya che, tame nathI thatA. A jJAna ja evuM che ne, tanmaya thAya ja nahIMne ! tamAre caMdubhAI tanmaya thaI jAya che, ene joyA karavAnuM. ane e abhyAsanI jarUra che. ene satsaMganI jarUra che. amArI pAse AvIne beso tema tema zakti vadhatI jAya. praznakartA : tanmayAkAra thaIe, to pachI navuM karma cArja thAya ? dAdAzrI : nA, e khabara paDene pachI ! pachI ApaNane khabara paDene ke A caMdubhAI tanmayAkAra thaI gayA che. to e cArja nA thAya. kapaDAmAM sAbu ghAlyo, paNa ene dhovAmAM kAcuM rahI gayuM to pharI dhoI nAkhavuM. ene kapaDAne nicovavAmAM kaMI bhUlacUka thaI gaI to pharI nIcovavuM... sahelo rasto chene, dAdAno rasto ! praznakartA : koI kriyA karIe chIe, te vakhate ekAkAra thaI javAya che. tyAra pachI ApaNane zuddhAtmAnA lakSamAM koNa pAchuM lAve che ? dAdAzrI : koI lAvatuM ja nathI. te ghaDIe ya hatuM. A to vRttio tanmayAkAra thAya che. pote AtmA to prakAzarUpe hato ja. e to peluM vRttio Ama tanmayAkAra thAyane, te ema lAge ke A zuddhAtmAnuM lakSa nahIM hoya ke zuM ? alyA che ja. te goTALo gayo ke zuddhAtmA pAcho hAjara ne hAjara ja dekhAya ApaNane. UMghamAM ya hAjara che. praznakartA : khAsa karIne ko'ka vAra gamatuM Ave tyAre emAM tanmayAkAra thaI javAya. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa e to che te caMdubhAI thAyane, ApaNe kyAM thaIe ?! ApaNane khabara paDe ke caMdubhAI have tanmayAkAra thayA. te pachI 'ApaNe' 'caMdubhAI'ne kahevuM, 'nA gamatuM Ave tyAre DheDaphajeto karo cho, enA karatAM badhuM Ama sIdhuM rAkho ne !' nA gamatuM Ave eTale virodha kare che. nathI gamatuM to virodha kare che te ya caMdubhAI, game che te ya caMdubhAI. eTale rAga-dveSa karyA kare che e 'caMdubhAI" ane vItarAga raho cho te 'tame" ! caMdubhAI dveSa kare che, to ya enI para tame vItarAga raho cho ane caMdubhAI rAga kare che, to ya vItarAga raho, evA tame jJAtA-draSTA paramAnaMdI !

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? 83 tanmayAkAra thavAya te bhramaNA ja ! praznakartA : je saMyogomAM tanmayAkAra thaI javAya che... dAdAzrI : tanmayAkAra thaI jAya che te ya tuM nathI, zuddhAtmA nathI. zuddhAtmA tanmayAkAra thaI zake ja nahIM. e tArI bhrAmaka mAnyatA che, te mAnyatAne lIdhe tanmayAkAra thaI jAya che. tene jANa ke tanmayAkAra keTalo thayo che A. ekadama tanmayAkAra thaI gayo che ke thoDo thoDo, kAcopoco ke saMpUrNa eDajasTa thaI gayo che ! e badhuM jANa. jANyuM ke tuM chUTyo. praznakartA : A bahu pAyAno savAla che. kAraNa ke tame kahyuM'tuM ke jJAna ApyA pachI badhAM nirlepa thaI jAya. to pachI amane to evAM nirlepa haju thayA dekhAtAM nathI. amane evuM dekhAya che ke A lepAyamAna thaI gayA, pachI pAchAM judAM paDyA, pAchAM lepAyamAna thayAM, evuM je amane bhAna thAya che, te kema thAya che ? dAdAzrI : tame pote lepAyamAna thaI jAva cho evuM bhAna thAya che, nahIM ? e bhAna, AtmabhAna nathI. AtmabhAna to, kyAreya lepAyamAna nA thAya, enuM nAma AtmabhAna kahevAya. mATe ApaNe kahevAnuM ke A jagyA ApaNI hoya. ApaNI jagyA AvI verAna nathI. ApaNI to jAyajenTIka(bhavya) che. A verAna jagyA ApaNI kyAMthI hoya ? A hoTala ApaNI nahIM, evuM khabara nA paDe ? ApaNe kaI nAtanAM chIe e hisAbe ApaNI hoTala khabara nA paDe ? sugaMdha uparathI samajI jaIe ke ahIM birayAnIvALI hoTala... eTale ApaNe hoTalane ya samajI jaIe. evuM A tanmayAkAra thAya e bhAva ApaNo nahIM. eTale tanmayAkAra kevA prakAre thAya che e 'joyA' karavuM. saMpUrNa tanmayAkAra thAya che ke aDadho tanmayAkAra thAya che ? praznakartA : hA, eTale judI judI DigrImAM tanmayAkAra thavAya che ! dAdAzrI : hA, paNa judI judI DigrIne je jANe che te AtmA che. evuM che ne, ATalAM badhAM tharmomiTara vaparAtAM haze, paNa koI DaoNkTaranAM AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) tharmomiTarane tAva caDI gayo haze ? zuddhAtmA tharmomiTara samAna che. e keTalI DigrI tAva caDhelo che e dekhADe. tharmomiTarane koI dA'Do tAva nathI Avyo ! e to UlaTuM tAva dekhADe evuM che ! loka kaheze ke bhaI, A tAvane aDI aDIne A tharmomiTarane tAva caDhI gayo che ! mUA, ene caDhato haze ? DaoNkTarane caDhI jAya, paNa tharmomiTarane nA caDhe. tharmomiTaranA mAlika je che ne ene caDhI jAya, DaoNkTarane ! 84 praznakartA : jyAre ame tanmayAkAra thaI jaIe eTalo vakhata amane zuddhAtmA padanuM bhAna nathI rahetuM ne ! dAdAzrI : zAthI nathI rahetuM paNa ? 'huM tanmayAkAra thaI gayo' eTale peluM bhAna khovAI jAya. koI mANase dArU nA pIdho hoya chatAM ya amatho ema kahe ke, hA, meM to Aja dArU pIdho che, to eTalo vakhata caDhI jAya. eTale dArUDiyA jevA lakSaNa nIkaLe, nA pIdho hoya chatAM ya. praznakartA : paNa keTalIka vakhata evA lepAyamAna thaI jaIe chIe ne, to pUrepUruM dArU pIdhA jevuM ja dekhAya che ! eno savAla che ne ! eTale ame kevI rIte jAtane nirlepa kahIe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe samajI javuM ke A hoTala ApaNI hoya. eTale bIjI kaI hoTala ApaNI che te jaDaze. dAdAe kahI che e hoTalamAM ApaNe huM nirlepa chuM, zuddha ja chuM, mane A kema hoya ? drazya ne draSTA eka nA hoya. tanmayAkAra thayA chIe e drazya che ane drazya pote kaMI samajI nA zake koI dA'Do ke A tanmayAkAra thayo chuM. e to draSTA ja jANI zake che. jANyuM koNe ? tyAre kahe, draSTAe. tame pote draSTA cho ! to ya 'potAne' khyAla nA Ave. kevI ajAyabI kahevAya ! praznakartA : evuM kazuMka thAya che, ke jethI ame drazyano bhAga banI jaIe chIe. amAruM draSTApaNuM te vakhate kyAM gayuM ? dAdAzrI : nA. evuM che ne, tame leboreTarImAM bhaNelA, to te cAra ja kalAkamAM tame bhaNI raho cho badhuM ?

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : eka phero prayoga karAvyo hoya to pharI karo, to mahIM keTaluMya kaMInI kaMI vastu nAkhI de badhI. to emAM ATalo TAIma lAge che, to A to, ahIM TAIma to lAgene ! praznakartA: paNa te vakhate huM draSTA tarIke bAjumAM beThelo hovo joIe ne, jonAro ? e jonAro aMdara bheravAI gayo ! dAdAzrI : nA, e to judo beThelo ja hoya che. bhaLI gayA evuM tamane lAge, bhAse evuM, saheja prekTisa pADavI paDaze. prekTisa pADyA vagara kema cAle ? ane jo bhaLI gayA to chUTo paDe nahIM, zI rIte chUTo pADo pachI ? pAchuM bhaLe ja nahIM. A to beunA svabhAva judA paDI gayAne ! potapotAnA svabhAvamAM AvI gayA !! bhAsyamAta pariNAma hoya mArA ! ApaNe jANavuM ke A bhAsyamAna thAya che AvuM, paNa bhAyamAna te ApaNuM pariNAma nathI. AvuM samaje to bahu jAgRti rahe. A jJAne ya bahu jAgRtivALuM ApeluM che. paNa pote jANI joIne Dakho kare che. eTale jAgRti ochI che. jAgRti hoya to to kazuM ene aDatuM ja nathI ! praznakartA: Apa jyAre kaho cho ke cAvIo badhI tamArI pAse che, amAro nizcaya che ke AjJAmAM rahevuM che, to amArI je ajAgRti che ke kema laMbAya che ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti to lAvavI joIe ne ! jAgRti to vadhAravI joIene ApaNe. e ja puruSArtha che ne ! jAgRti e ja puruSArtha che. bIjo koI puruSArtha nathI. e pAMca AjJA jeTalI mahIM paLAya tyAre badhI jAgRti utpanna thAya. nahIM to jAgRti zenI utpanna thAya ? AjJAo nathI pALatAM tethI jAgRti ochI che ! have bhAsyamAna pariNAmane jovAnAM. bhAsyamAna eTale to hoya yA nA paNa hoya. khAlI bhAse ja. eTale e tamane bhAse che. bhAse eTale dekhAya che, paNa sAcI vastu nathI. jo potAne ema lAge ke nA, sAcuM che to lAge, nahIM to nathI. khoTuM to lAge nahIM, evuM bhAsyamAna pariNAma che, khAlI AbhAsa ja che. gUMcavADo hoya tyAM sudhI bhAyamAna pariNAma bahu pajave. dAdAe dIdho tirlepa-niHzaMka AtmA ! praznakartA: A je DiscArja kahyuM tame, e to saMvarapUrvakanI nirjarA thaI. e to jyAre pote nirlepa rahe, tyAre ja e vastu banI zake ne ? dAdAzrI : cho ja nirlepa pachI AvavAnuM kyAMthI have ? kaye gAmathI AvavAnuM che ? nirlepa ja che. A tamane zaMkA che te ja tamane lepAyamAna karI rahI che. paNa bhagavAnane pUchIe ke 'bhagavAna, Ane zaMkA paDe che, eTale nirlepa nahIM ne ?" tyAre kahe, "nA, e zaMkA che to ya ene karma nA baMdhAya." kAraNa ke zaMkA e jAgRti che. bhagavAna zuM kahe ? A jagatanA lokone zaMkA nahIM Ave. emane zaMkA che mATe jAgRti che, mATe ene karma nahIM baMdhAya. eTale A bhagavAna kevA pAkAM che ? huM chAvarA nathI vALato. kahe che, ame chAvarA nA vALIe. chAvaro bApane chokaro vALe ke chokarAne bApa vALe. A chAvarA vALavAnuM jJAna nahIM, A to ekkekTa jJAna ke zaMkA paDI mATe tuM niHzaMka chuM. mATe tuM zuddhAtmA chuM. tuM zuddhAtmA thayo e nakkI vAta. tane kema zaMkA paDI ? zaMkA koIne paDe ja nahIM. koIne zaMkA nA paDe ne ke huM tanmayAkAra thaI gayo A phalANAM joDe. eTale vAta paNa sAcI che, zaMkA paDI to ye niHzaMka chuM evuM ! zaMkA paDI, mATe tuM zuddhAtmA chuM e nakkI thaI gayuM. tyAre kahe, nakkI thaI gayuM. pachI mAre have vAMdho nahIM kazo ya, duHkha nathI bA. jIvatAne zaMkA paDe ke marelAne ! praznakartA : jIvatAne ja paDe ! dAdAzrI : te jeTalAne zaMkA paDe, ene bhagavAne jIvatA kahyA ne

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? pelAne marelA kahyAM ema jJAna kahe che. DahApaNanI vAta che ke ? tIrthakaronI vAta DahApaNanI che ? A vItarAgonI vAta DAhyI che ? zaMkA paDe che, chatAM tuM niHzaMka chuM ?! eTale AvuM ajAyaba vijJAna che. ane tyAM ye kadI jo jora nA mAre to pachI enI ja bhUla che ne ? | udhyate jovuM te akrama ! mahIM aMtaHkaraNa tanmayAkAra thaI rahyuM che, tene ApaNe 'jANavuM paDe ne 'jovuM' paDene ? mahIM aMtaHkaraNa tanmayAkAra nA thAya to koI kArya ja nA thAya. tanmayAkAra to thavuM ja joIe ne ? ame ahIM gADImAM AvavA nIkaLIe eTale aMdara badhuM tanmayAkAra ja hoya ne, paNa ame 'joIe' ne 'jANIe'. ame chUTA rahIne kAma karIe. tamArAthI eTaluM badhuM kAma nA thAya paNa tamane lakSa rahyA kare ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM'. koI phero lakSa bhUlI javAya to pratIti rahyA kare. bAkI mahIM aMdara badhuM cAlyA ja kare. ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM. praznakartA : vicAra Ave ane pachI tanmayAkAra thAya. citra-phoTo batAve, te tanmayAkAra dazA kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : paNa e to DiscArja ja ne, eno vAMdho nahIM. e ApaNe 'jANuM', tyArathI ApaNe chUTA ane e chUTA. 'jANanAro' chUTo ja hoya. 'karanAro' bhAMjagaDavALo hoya. ApaNe chUTA ne chUTA. praznakartA : e evuM ja rahe che ke A badhuM caMdubhAI ja kare che. pahelAM udayanI aMdara tanmayAkAra thavAtuM'tuM, tene badale ApaNe ApaNo udaya have joIe chIe. dAdAzrI : udayane joIe. praznakartA: ApaNA udayane joIe chIe ke mAro Avo udaya Avyo. dAdAzrI : have badhA udayane 'jovAnA', enuM nAma akrama. praznakartA : ApaNe 'jovAnuM cUkIe to ja buddhi Dakho kare ne ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : hA. paNa cUko cho, e 'jouM' chuM ne badhe ? paNa eno vAMdho nahIM. ApaNe haju to A kevaLajJAnamAM aTakyA chIe. bIjuM kazuM nahIM. A badhI jhINI vastuo ja kevaLajJAna aTakAve che. praznakartA : emAM be vAta thaI. caMdubhAInI buddhi Dakho karatI hoya to e Dakho kare ane 'huM tene jANuM. dAdAzrI : tame 'jANo' eTale tame chUTA. ane caMdubhAI ke chUTA. jo tame 'jANo' to beu chUTA ane nA 'jANo' to beu baMdhAyelA. praznakartA: kAraNa ke pachI buddhinA DakhAno koI artha rahyo nahIM. dAdAzrI : kazoya artha rahyo nahIM. buddhinA arthane ahIM gaNatarI ja nathI. AnA udayakarmathI A Ane Ape che ne enA udayakarmathI e le che. A enA udayakarmathI ANe pAMca lAkha rUpiyA dhIryA ane enA udayakarmathI eNe lIdhA. pachI eno Dakho ja kyAM rahyo te ? have pelAnuM udayakarma Ave pAchA ApavAnuM tyAre e Ape ne pelAnuM levAnuM udayakarma hoya to le. nahIM to nA le. praznakartA to copaDo na lakhe to ya cAle. dAdAzrI : copaDA lakhavAnI jarUra ja kyAM rahe che ? A badhI jhINI vAto, tIrthaMkaranA gharanI ja vAto A badhI ! praznakartA : Ape kahyuM A tame 'jANo' to caMdubhAI ke chUTA ne tame ya chUTA. e beu chUTA. e nA samajAyuM. dAdAzrI : kema nA samajAya AmAM ? caMdubhAI chuTA thayA eTale pote chUTA ja che. pelA to udayakarmane AdhIna che. udayakarmane AdhInamAM jokhamadArI hotI nathI. praznakartA : nahIM, jarA e goTALo thAya che. pelA udayakarmane AdhIna che to pelA koNa ? udayakarmane AdhIna je che e koNa ? dAdAzrI : e caMdubhAI che.

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : udayakarmane AdhIna 'caMdubhAI ane jANanAra pote che. dAdAzrI : hA. pote ke potAnI e prajJA ja ! praznakartA: have jo jANanAra pote hoya prajJAzakti to Dakho nA kare ? dAdAzrI : mahIM Dakho to caMdubhAI kare, udayakarmanA AdhIna hoya to. paNa temAM Ane prajJAzaktinI jAgRti nA hoya to e bhego thaI gayo. jAgRti nA hoya, te ghaDIe Dakho thaI jAya pelAmAM. praznakartA : prajJA bhegI thaI jAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. prajJA bhegI nA thAya. prajJA to enuM kAma karyA kare, paNa jAgRti nA hoya to Dakho thaI jAya. ApaNane khabare ya paDe ke A Dakho thayo. praznakartA : prajJA jo jAgRtimAM nA hoya to bhego koNa thaI jAya che caMdubhAI joDe ? caMdubhAInA DakhA joDe koNa bheguM thaI jAya che ? dAdAzrI : ajAgRti. eTale bolavuM nahIM, mauna rahevuM, enuM nAma Dakho. joyuM-jANyuM nahIM enuM nAma mauna rahyA. ajAgRti eTale enuM nAma Dakho. bIjuM koNa bheguM thavAnuM ? ene pAchI mIThAza hau varte, eTale enuM nAma bhegA thaI gayA kahevAyane ! praznakartA : mIThAza kone varte ? dAdAzrI : A eno je DiscArja ahaMkArane. have jo tyAM AgaLa 'jonAro' hota to beu chUTA thaI jAta. Ano hisAba bAkI rahyo, te AvatA bhavane mATe sillaka rahI, zeSa vadhI ane tIrthaMkara niHzeSa hoya. Ane zeSa vadhI. pharI pAcho bhAgAkAra karavo paDaze. zeSa vadhe nahIM evo joIe. praznakartA : udayakarma ane caMdubhAI e beu judA che ? kAraNa ke Ape kahyuM ke caMdubhAI udayakarmamAM Dakho kare paNa ApaNe emAM bhaLIe nahIM. dAdAzrI : caMdubhAI to Dakho kare. e to udayakarmamAM Dakho karAvavAno svabhAva ja che ajJAnatAno. caMdubhAI eTale ajJAnatA. ane eno svabhAva ja che Dakho karavAno. paNa tene ApaNe jo 'jANIe' to beu chUTA. jANIe nahIM eTale mauna rahe. ane mauna rahIe eTale pelAmAM sahI thaI gaI ! praznakartA : ApaNe tanmaya thayA, emAM ekAtma thaIe ne mauna eTale to pachI ? emAM eka thaIe evuM ? dAdAzrI : are, TaiDakAve che, to ya khabara nathI rahetI ke huM A khoTuM karI rahyo chuM. bolo have, kevA kevA moTA udayakarma jatA rahetA haze ?! praznakartA : udayakarmamAM je Dakho thato hoya te ghaDIe mauna rahIe eTale sahI thaI gaI. e mauna rahevuM tyAM na hovuM joIe evuM ? dAdAzrI : udayakarmamAM jema hoya tema thavA dene ! kazuM karavAnuM to rahyuM nathI. have jANavAnuM rahyuM che. mauna eTale zuM ? udayakarma sAmasAmI laDe temAM tame 'joyuM' nahIM mATe mauna rahyA. upayoga nA dIdho eTale pramAdamAM gayuM, e mauna. pramAda e mauna, ApaNA AvatA bhavanI sillake ya joIene ! badhuM kaMI vaTAvI khaIe to cAle ? praznakartA : ne e mauna nA hoya, to kevuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : chUTA thaI jAya beu. caMdubhAI pelAnI joDe Dakho karatAM hoya tene ApaNe "joyuM" ane "jANyuM eTale ApaNe ya chUTA ane caMdubhAI ke chUTA. caMdubhAIne pharI karmanuM koI kAraNa rahyuM nahIM ane ApaNe ya nA rahyuM. praznakartA: mauna na hoya to zuM hoya ? jene Apa jAgRti kaho cho ? enI sAmeno zabda zuM che ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti ! ajAgRtine mauna kahIe chIe ApaNe. jAgRti nA rahe, enuM nAma pramAda, jAgRti eTale apramatta.

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? 'huM' varte have jAgRtimAM ! praznakartA : tanmayAkAra koNa thAya che ? 91 dAdAzrI : ahaMkAra. emAM tanmayAkAra nA thavA de e jAgRti. e ja chUTuM rAkhe. mULa AtmA tanmayAkAra thato nathI. ApaNe ajAgRtimAM tanmayAkAra thaI jaIe chIene ! praznakartA H pratiSThita AtmA jJAna prApta karyA pachI jAgRti hoya to tanmayAkAra nA thAya ? dAdAzrI : pachI bhAna rahe che e eka jAgRti che ne jAgRti enA svabhAvamAM Avaze eTale e tanmayAkAra thAya nahIM. A to pAchalo phorsa che tyAM sudhI khasI jAya. phorsa ocho thAya pachI tanmayAkAra nA thAya. je DiscArja che e badhuM TAMkInuM pANI bharelo mAla che. praznakartA : eTale zuM samajavAnuM ? jAgRti thaI, eTale tame tanmayAkAra nA thAva evuM tame kahyuM, eTale kevI rIte samajavuM ? dAdAzrI : tame eTale zuM ? mULa AtmA nahIM. haju che te 'huM' to raheluM ja che, pahelAM che te pratiSThita AtmA tarIke 'huM' hatuM, have jAgRti tarIke 'huM' che. e 'huM' tanmayAkAra nA thaI jAya. praznakartA : ApaNe tanmayAkAra nA thaIe, eTale pratiSThita AtmA tanmayAkAra nathI thato, eno artha e thayo. dAdAzrI : nA, ApaNe eTale koNa ? te vakhate hAjara je che te ! te vakhate je ApaNI biliphamAM che. haju zuddhAtmA saMpUrNa thayA nathI. mULa pratiSThita AtmA pAcho chUTI gayo. have jAgrata AtmA, eTale jAgRti. jAgRti je pariNAma che, e tyAM atyAre Ama tanmayAkAra nathI thatI. praznakartA : jJAna maLyA pachI pratiSThita AtmA to che ja, to e zuM kare che ? enI sthiti zuM pachI ? dAdAzrI : pachI enI kazI sthiti nathI. e DiscArja svarUpa che. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) eTale nizcetana cetana che. e jJeya svarUpe rahe che. pachI jJeya svarUpe 'zuM kare che ne zuM nahIM ?" tene jANanAra jAgRti che. 92 svarUpanuM bhAna thatAM pahelA pratiSThita AtmAne ja ApaNe jJAtA mAnatA hatA. svarUpa jJAna pachI e pratiSThita AtmA pote jJeya thaI jAya che ane tyAM AgaLa jAgRti pote ja jJAtA thAya che. eTale ke pahelAM pratiSThita AtmA tarIke 'huM' hatuM, te have jAgRti tarIke 'huM' thAya che. ane mULa AtmA to enI AgaLa rahyo haju. A jAgRtimAM AvI gayuM. saMpUrNa jAgrata thayo eTale mULa AtmAmAM ekAkAra thaI jAya che. saMpUrNa nA thAya tyAM sudhI juduM rahe che. tyAM sudhI aMtarAtmA tarIke rahe. tyAM bahirmukhI pada chUTI gayeluM hoya che. aMtarAtma dazA pUrI thAya ke paramAtmA pada prApta thAya ! tanmayAkAra tathItI nizAtI ! praznakartA : mananA vicAro, vANInA saMjogo ane dehanA vartanamAM AtmA tanmayAkAra nA thayo kyAre kahevAya ? e kevI paristhiti hoya ? dAdAzrI : eTale e vAto karato hoya te ghaDIe, mahIM saheje asara nA hovI joIe. praznakartA : asara na hoya eTale zenI asara na hoya ? dAdAzrI : moMDhA para pheraphAra thayA kare te. pote judo hoya ne evI rIte vAta kare. bIjA mANasanI vAta karatA hoya enA jevuM. bIjA mANasanI vAta kare ne, evI rIte vAta kare enuM nAma tanmayAkAra nahIM ane caMdubhAIne joIne vAta kare. caMdubhAIne tame jotA jotA vAta karo ne, to e AtmA judo kahevAya. vyavahAra vakhate ya pote jANatAra ja ! saMsAranI cIjomAM to AtmAne tanmayAkAra rAkhavAnI jarUra ja nathI. e sAyanTiphika sarakamasTenziyala eviDansa che badhuM. deha-mana badhuM

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? bhegA thaI, saMsAramAM kAma kare eTale enuM phaLa maLe. e to kaMI puchya hoya to phaLa naphArUpI maLe, nahIM to pApa hoya to khoTarUpe avaLuM phaLa maLe. 93 praznakartA : emAM e vyavahAra pUro thavAmAM potAnI jarUra nathI evuM thayuM ne ? dAdAzrI : AtmAnI jarUra nathI. praznakartA : eTale AtmA judo rahI zake, jJAna jAgRtimAM rahI zake ? dAdAzrI : A thaI zake badhuM ane AtmA judo rahI zake. loka AtmAne hau joDe laI jAya che ne vakhata bagADe che. praznakartA : saMsAranI kriyAmAM AtmAne parovavAnI jarUra ja nathI. dAdAzrI : mana-vacana-kAyA to jAya ja emAM ane khoTamAM ya manavacana-kAyA hoya. loko ApaNA kahe che ne, paNa karyA vagara zI rIte puchya phaLa Ape ? mUA, karavAthI ja maLatuM hoya to khoTa zuM karavA khAva cho ? mATe amala puNya ne pApano ja che A. A karavAnuM to mahIM joDe eviDansa che eka jAtano. praznakartA : puNya ke pApanuM phaLa AvavA mATe to A kriyA thaI rahI che badhI. dAdAzrI : A saMjogo badhA bhegA thAya che. praznakartA : jyAre kaMI paNa kAma Ave, tyAra pahelAM jAgRti hoya ane pachI e jatuM rahe badhuM. e kAma vakhate AkhuM parovAI javuM paDe ane pachI pUruM thAya pachI pAchuM Ama jJAnanI vAto zarU thAya... dAdAzrI : tyAM AtmA parovAto ja nathI. 94 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : have tyAM jAgRti kevI rIte rAkhavI ema ? dAdAzrI : e ahaMkAra-buddhinI jAgRti hoya che. praznakartA : eTale je parovAyA vagara kAma thAya nahIM pUruM ? dAdAzrI : e buddhi parovAya che. potAnA manamAM evuM lAge ke huM parovAI gayo. eTale evI asara thAya. praznakartA : eTale tyAM zuM rahevuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : tyAM to jANakAra rahevuM joIe ke buddhi parovAIne A gADuM cAlyuM ane sAruM thayuM ne khoTuM thayuM e jANe che te AtmA che. pelo kahe che ke huM parovAI gayo, to e pachI sAruM-khoTuM koNe jANyuM ? praznakartA : barobara. eTale e AkhA vyavahAra vakhate jANakAra ja hato pote. dAdAzrI : jANakAra je rahe che e ja AtmA. AmAM ghUsI gayo e AtmA na hoya. praznakartA : e ghUsI gayA jevuM lAge che. dAdAzrI : e buddhi ne ahaMkAra. praznakartA : eTale tyAM evuM samajI levAnuM ke kharekhara ApaNe ghUsI jatA nathI emAM ? dAdAzrI : evuM samajavAnuM ja hoya. kAraNa ke pachI ApaNe kahIe paNa... 'thayuM sIdhuM ke vAMkuM ?' tyAre kahe, 'thayuM sIdhuM.' ghUsI janArane khabara nA hoya. sAruM thayuM ke kharAba thayuM e ghUsI janArane khabara hoya nahIM. praznakartA : paNa je kSaNe vyavahAra thaI rahyo che, te kSaNe AvuM jAgrata rahevuM, e be eTa e TAIma banI jAya che ke pachI be vacce aMtara rahe che ?

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tanmayAkAra koNa ? jANe koNa ? dAdAzrI : eTa e TAIma hoya ja, aMtara kazuM che ja nahIM. enI mAnyatAmAM phera rahe che. e mAnyatAmAM phera hoya to ya pachI kahIe ke A jANyuM koNe ? e jANe che te AtmA. ghusI gayo, enuM nAma AtmA nahIM. ekAkAra thaI gayo, enuM nAma AtmA nahIM. AtmA ahaMkAra thaI zake nahIM koI dahADo, e to jANakAra tarIke rahe che ne ! AtmA chUTo ja rahe che, jANakAra ja rahe che. ghusI gayuM evuM lAgyuM hoya to pachI pharI pratikramaNa karIne pharI pAchuM AvI javuM joIe ke mArI bhUla thaI. ghusI jato ja nathI. pahelAMnI A Teva hatI. enI e Teva atyAre cAlu che. 95 praznakartA : eTale ApanA kahevA pramANe ekalI samajaphera ja karavAnI che, bAkI to badho vyavahAra thaI ja rahyo che. dAdAzrI : thaI ja rahyuM che. praznakartA : samajaNanI bhUla na thAya evI goThavaNI karyA karavAnI ? dAdAzrI : ghusI gayo te huM nahIM. huM judo, ghusI janAra judo. kramika mArgavALAno AtmA vedaka che ane ApaNAmAM nirveda che. e mAro AtmA tanmayAkAra thaI gayo, kahe ane ApaNe jANakAra hoya ke zAtA varte che ke azAtA varte che. eTale kramikamAM evuM hoya ke vedaka ghUsI jAya eTale mAro AtmA ghUsI gayo, kaheze. ane e ghUsavAya nA de. praznakartA : ghUsavA nA de, to vyavahAra DIsTarba thaI jAya ? dAdAzrI : vyavahAra badho DIsTarba thaI jAya. paNa e vyavahArane choDatA choDatA jAya, tyAga karatAM karatAM AgaLa jAya. ApaNAmAM vyavahAramAM rahevAnI chUTa zAthI ApI ke AtmA vedaka che nahIM. bahAranA to, kramika mArga to evuM ja kahe, ke e pote ja vedaka che. kAraNa ke ene pUruM jJAna nathI thayuM. pUro AtmA thayo nathI. pUro AtmA thayelo vedaka nA hoya, nirveda hoya. praznakartA : mULa AtmA to pUro ja chene, paNa ene pelI draSTi pUrepUrI thaI nathIne evuM ApanuM kahevAnuM che ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : hA, e to AtmA pUro ja che, paNa evI draSTi kramikamAM thaI nathI. krame krame thaze. jema jema choDato jaze tema draSTi khIlatI jaze. parigraha ochAM thAya tema tema draSTi khIlatI jAya. praznakartA : e lokone, kramika mArgavALAne parigraha athavA vyavahAra ocho thAya evo nizcaya hoya che ke enA udayamAM ja evuM laIne AvelA hoya che ? dAdAzrI : evo nizcaya ja hoya. praznakartA : e vyavahAra ocho thAya e Ama jAgRtine vadhAre hitakArI che ? dAdAzrI : hA. praznakartA : jAgRti saheje vadhe enAthI ? dAdAzrI : hA, paNa emane agrazoca badhuM rahe. A to akrama vijJAnamAM A badhA loko AtmAne jANe, nahIM to AtmA kyAMthI jANe ? koIne mAnyAmAM ja nA Avene ? praznakartA : to e koI AtmA pAme evuM banI ja nA zake ? dAdAzrI : AtmA je dahADe pAme tyAre tIrthaMkara hoya ke kevaLI hoya ane mokSe cAlyo jAya eTale vAta ja karavAno vakhata nA maLe. //////////

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AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA: e pelI bIjI sITamAM je besAI javAya che, te tyAM kevI rIte nA besavuM ane pelAmAM ja kevI rIte coMTI rahevuM ? eTale kartApaNAmAM AvI jAya che vArevAre ! dAdAzrI : pelI sITa upara besI gayA ane zoka lAge eTale jANavuM ke ApaNI nhoya A. ane zaoNka lAge eTale UThI javuM. zaoNka lAge e khurazI ApaNI nhoya. praznakartA : zoka lAge che to ya besI rahevAya che. dAdAzrI : to majA kare. lahera, pANI ne bhajIyAM karo. praznakartA : zoka lAge paNa UThato nathI, to UThe kaI rIte ? kAraNa ke jJAtA-draSTA enAthI rahevAtuM nathI, to e kaI rIte rahevuM ? dAdAzrI : UThatA nathI, ene tame juone ! je UThatAM nathI, te tame hoya. eka "caMdubhAI che ane eka 'tame' cho. te UThatA nathI e caMdubhAI. caMdubhAIne kahIe, "cAlo sUI raho, besavuM hoya to beso bA, gamatuM hoya to ! huM 'joyA" karIza ane tame besI raho.' solyuzana to hovuM joIene ! [1.5] sITanuM silekzana, sva-paratuM ! seMga sITamAM beThA tethI... praznakartA : dAdA, caMdubhAIne je karavuM che, enA karatAM caMdubhAIe je karavuM joIe e be vastu judI che. eTale dAkhalA tarIke caMdubhAIne sinemA jovA javuM che ane gharamAM khuba mahemAna AvyA hoya to ene gharamAM kAma karavuM joIe, evI ene khabara che. paNa emAM enI sinsIyArITI nathI. to emAM sinsIyArITI kevI rIte lAvavI ? dAdAzrI : tame thoDI dhIraja pakaDo ne zuM thAya che e 'joyA' karo. eTale basa thaI gayuM. eTale kampliTa sinsiyAriTI AvI gaI. praznakartA : paNa caMdubhAI evA che ke AgamAM ja hAtha ghAlavA jAya. dAdAzrI : nA, to ya ApaNe 'jovuM joIe ke caMdubhAIe keTalo hAtha ghAlyo, ATalo hAtha ghAlyo ke ATalo hAtha ghAlyo e 'jovuM'. tame to kliyara cho, meM tamane kliyaransa jagyA upara besADelA che. tame zA mATe anakliyara thAva cho ? tame kaI sthiti upara beso cho ? rijharvezana uparane ! tamAruM rijharvezana karyuM che tyAM beso chone ke anarijharvaDa jagyAe beso cho? caMdabhAI to zokhIna che eTale anarijharvaDa jagyA upara besI Ave evA che. praznakartA : eTale badhuM thAya che e noMdha karyA karavAnI ? dAdAzrI : badhI kriyAne 'jovAnI'. e jo kacakaca karato hoya to ene ya pAcho jovo ApaNe ke 'te ya mAruM svarUpa hoya' kahIe. evuM A dAdAnuM jJAna che. upara koI nahIM, vidhAuTa bosa. uparInA uparI e dAdA bhagavAna ! praznakartA : eTale kacakaca kare che, e kayo bhAga ? dAdAzrI : e bIjo bhAga che e caMdubhAInA pakSano. praznakartA : eTale e je kacakaca kare che ene paNa jovAnuM. dAdAzrI : ene ya paNa jovo !

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1% AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) sITanuM silekzana, sva-paranuM ! praznakartA : eTale je jue che e to kazuM bolatA ja nathI, khAlI jue ja che. dAdAzrI : jue che eno uparI koI nathI. ene koI vaDhanAra nA hoya, kazuM nA hoya. anaMta zaktio paDelI che. paNa caMdubhAInuM rakSaNa karo cho ne, eTale badhI zaktio AvaraNamAM besI rahe che. rakSaNa karo cho ne caMdubhAInuM? ughADe choge karo cho ne ? eTale ja zaktio khIlatI nathI ! A AjJA pALIne rahe che, to ya niraMtara samAdhi jAya nahIM. tame tamArI khurazI upara ane caMdubhAI emanI khurazI upara besyA kare. caMdubhAInI khurazI upara besavA jAva cho, tenI A upAdhi che. pahelAMnI Teva paDelI che te ! tamAre to bahArathI khasI jaIne, potAnI sITa upara besavAnuM che. have ApaNI sITa kaI ? mahIM cAra-pAMca jAtanI sITo che. te ApaNI kaI sITa ke jyAM ekadama ijhI lAge, e ApaNI sITa, saheja ghasAro lAge to jANavuM ke A bIjI sITa AvI. khUMce to jANavuM agara zoka lAge to samajI javuM ke A zoka lAgyo. e badhI sITa upara nahIM besatAM, ApaNI sITa upara besavuM. ko'ka to masAlo copaDe, 'caMdubhAI sAheba, tame to bahu lAyaka mANasa cho, ghaNA sArA cho." paNa e copaDe to ApaNe copaDAvavuM ? caMdubhAI e sITa ApaNI nathI. tyAMthI to dAdAe khaseDyA. 'huM caMdubhAI chuM eTale to mAra khAtA hatA. kaMI paNa bhogavaTo Ave, to samajAya ke A huM bIjI sITa para beTho chuM, A sITa mArI nhoya. te tyAMthI UThIne pAchuM zuddhAtmAnI sITa upara besI javuM. ApaNI sITa upara besI javuM paNa tuM to tyAM besI rahuM chuM, jANe Dabala cArja ApavAno hoya e rIte ! kaMI paNa mana avaLuM vicAra kare ke tarata ja ApaNe jANavuM ke A bIjI UMdhI sITa upara chuM, A mArI sITa upara nathI. potAnI sITa upara jatA rahevuM tarata. bahu vAra besI rahuM chuM, nahIM ? praznakartA : hA, dAdA. evuM thAya che. dAdAzrI : tethI tAruM moDhuM bagaDeluM dekhAya che. meM kahyuM, 'A moTuM kema bagaDeluM che !" koI paNa aDacaNa Ave, to ApaNI potAnI sITa upara jatuM rahevuM tarata. je doSo thaI gayAM tenI pAchI mAphI mAMgavAnI. gUMcAyA karavA jevuM jagata joya. gUMcAmaNa thAya, kazuM zarIramAM gUMcAvA mAMDyuM ke tarata UThIne ApaNI khurazI para besI javuM. ene 'joyA' karavuM, 'caMdubhAI, kema gUMcAva cho tame ?' kahIe. aMte birAjo paramAtmAnI ja sITa para ! 'huM A chuM, huM A chuM, huM upadezaka chuM, huM phalANo chuM.' e badhuM chUTuM ane 'huM AtmA chuM'mAM AvI gayo. pelA badhAmAMthI gAdI UThI gaI. bIjI gAdI upara bese pachI AtmA rahI ja jAyane ?! jyAMthI beThA hatA tyAMthI paNa chelle pachI UThI javAnuM. ame besADIe paNa kharAM ke have caMdubhAI Ama karI zake tema karI zake ane pachI gAdImAM e besI rahe eTale godo mArIe. dareka padamAM besIne uThI javAnuM che. jarA mIThuM lAge, thoDA dA'DA besI rahene, eTale ame godo mArIe. UThIne ahIM AvavAnuM che pAchuM chevaTe. paNa A to kAyadesara e padamAM besI-besIne AvavAnuM. e besI ja rahe to zuM thAya ? mAre to upAdhi thAyane ! e gAma nA jAya ne ! peluM rahI jAyane ! eTale A cakkara bahu UMdhuM che badhuM. caMdubhAIne Aje besADIe ahIM AgaLa. pAchA parama divase uThADIe. chevaTe AtmAmAM besavAnuM che. ane bahAra 'mane kazuM AvaDatuM nathI' kahI devAnuM che. tyAM sudhI e AvaDatamAM rahevAnuM che. tyAM sudhI gAdI para besavAnuM che. pachI 'kazuM AvaDatuM nathI' kahI devAnuM. nahIM to e AvaData nA hoya to sTeja upara besI zake nahIM. caMdubhAI manamAM ema samaje ke huM samajAI zake ema chuM, to e besI zake nahIM. ane beThA sivAya niveDo Ave nahIM. eTale ame paheluM poSaNa ApIe. pachI pAcho uThADIe godo mArIne. eTale tema karatAM karatAM mokSe javAze. sahelI vastu nathI. A to badhAM bahu moTA jokhamo paNa A jJAna maLyA pachI vAMdho nahIM. duHkhadAyI na thaI paDe.

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sITanuM silekzana, sva-paranuM ! 101 pachI potAne samajAya ke mane uThADyo to sAruM thayuM. pAchuM bIjI jagyAe besADIe. pAchuM enuM e ja ne vaLI. ema karatAM karatAM jyAre khurazIo thaI rahe tyAre ame kahIe ke ahIM besI jA ane kahIe ke bahAra khoTI che khurazIo. praznakartA : dAdA, pahelethI besADI done eTale maTI jAya. dAdAzrI : nA, pahelethI nA thAya. e to badhAM ja bhogavavA paDe e pada, dareka pada bhogavavAnA. anubhavamAM AvavA joIe. nahIM to AtmAmAM peThA pachI pAcho manamAM bhAva thAya ke A padamAM jaI AvuM. cAkhI AvuM. cAkhIne Avyo eTale pachI bhAMjagaDa ja nahIMne ! praznakartA : e vAta sAcI. anubhava siddha karavAno. dAdAzrI : anubhava thavo ja joIe. badhAM anubhavamAMthI pasAra thayA pachI meM kahyuM, "mane kazuM AvaDatuM nathI.' praznakartA : ne ema ne ema bolavAnuM cAlu karI daIe ame ? dAdAzrI : nA cAle. evuM cAlatuM haze ? peluM prApta thayuM nathI te pahelAM che te A choDI daIe, zuM thAya ? peluM prApta thavuM joIe ane eka bAju pUrNatA thatI jAya. paNa A pUrNa thAya tyAre peluM pUrNa thAya. bahu samajavA jevI, jhINI vAto. ApaNe ahIM pAse paDI rahyAne eTale badhuM UMcuM thaze. praznakartA : dAdA, tamane soMpyuM eTale pachI tamAre je karavuM hoya, jyAM besADavA hoya tyAM besADI ne jyAM uThADavAnA hoya tyAM uThADavAnuM. tamAre je karavuM hoya ema karo dAdA. dAdAzrI : hA. basa basa. eTale vAMdho nahIM. soMpyuM hoya tene soMpyuM eTale uThADe ne besADe, uThADe ne besADe. nA soMpyuM hoya ne, ene pachI amAre karavuM paDe thoDuM. pachI chokaro khattAM khAto khAto Ave paNa Ave kharo. eka phero AtmA prApta karyo che ne ! choDe nahIM pachI. A rasto nA jaDe to Ama gUMcAIne, Ama gUMcAIne pAcho rasto kADhI nAkhe. 102. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jAgRti, tahIM vyavasthitane AdhIta ! mahIM ThekANe lAvIza ke AvuM ne AvuM ja rahIza ? rakhaDAvI mArIza ? praznakartA : ThekANe ja lAvavAnuM. dAdAzrI : haju to vadhAre saLagaze tyAre, "sahana nathI thatuM pAchuM mane kahe che. mUA, tane sahana nathI thatuM ke pelAne nathI thatuM ? tuM to jANanAro. te pelA padamAM nahIM besane ! ke sahana nathI thatuM. te haju to pelA padamAM besI rahyo chuMne ! praznakartA : ekjhakTa che. evuM ja che. dAdAzrI : tyAre kahe, mArAthI sahana thatuM nathI. te tuM pelA padamAM beTho chuM. ahIM besa. evuM UThADa UThADa karIne soeka vakhata ahIM besADyo haze. pAcho vaLI besI gayo te besI gayo, te vaLI pharI ko'ka dahADo UThyo pAcho. pAcho jaIne besI Avaze. praznakartA : A bAju saLage che, ne pote judo rahe che, e judA rahevAnuM vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM gaNAya ? dAdAzrI : nA, nA. vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM hotuM haze ? vyavasthita to ene pelI bAju besADe ne puruSArtha A bAju besADe. vyavasthita to ene tyAM ja laI jAya. praznakartA : evuM kema ? evuM zAthI ? dAdAzrI : vyavasthita pudgalane lAgIne che, AtmAne lAgIne nathI. eTale tyAM jAya to e vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM che. ahIM rahe to vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM nathI, svataMtra che. praznakartA : dAdA, aMtaratapanI vAta chene A ? dAdAzrI : hA. aMtaratamAM tyAM ekAkAra thaI gayo eTale vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM ane ekAkAra nA thayo ane mArA vacanabaLe Ama chUTo rahyo, to vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM nahIM.

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sITanuM silekzana, sva-paranuM ! 103 104 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : eTale bhegA thaI javuM e vastu ke A je tapa che, emAM kyA vibhAga mATe vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM kaho cho ? dAdAzrI : nA, bhegA thavuM te ja vyavasthita. vyavasthita AvuM ja hatuM, temAMthI A puruSArtha karIne juduM pADyuM ane enI baLatarA. vyavasthitane oLaMgyuM enI baLatarA dina-rAta cAlu rahe ane ApaNane majA Ave, nirAMte AiskrIma khAya toya ogaLe nahIM. kharI majA Ave, nahIM ?! ' kahyuM chene, uttama pada AvyuM che A. jo A saLagyA karaze to kAma nIkaLI jaze. badho kacaro bALIne bhasmIbhUta karI nAkhene ! eTale je khurazI upara tuM besIza, tyAM kazuM du:kha nA thAya tyAre jANavuM ke A khurazI ApaNI. vedanAvALA bhAga upara koI bese ja nahIMne ! koI khurazI upara saheja dajhAvAya, koI khurazI upara vadhAre dajhAvAya, koI khurazI upara zaoNka lAge. e tyAMthI UThI javuM, jhaTa, evI mahIM cAra-pAMca khurazIo che. evI samajaNa pADI ene, pachI pAcho besato hatoya kharo paNa pAchuM pharI uThADuM. have khabara paDe che tane ke A khurazImAM khoTI rIte besI gayo chuM ? praznakartA : dAdA, khabara to paDe ja che. dAdAzrI : haju khabara paDe che tyAM sudhI e pheraphAra thavAnI AzA. e khabara ja nA paDe, teno upAya zo pachI ? atyAre to tame vAto karo e mane saMbhaLAya nahIM, to pachI mAre zuM emAM levAdevA ? mane zuM phAyado ? te ApaNe rileTIva upara besIe, te tarata khabara nA paDe ke zoka lAge ? eTale UThIne tyAM pelI zuddhAtmAnI khurazI upara besI javuM. mATe svabhAvane oLakho. zaoNka lAge tyAM ja besIe pachI bumAbuma karIe. 'dAdA, mane mahIM thAya che...' 'alyA mUA ! tuM UThane ahIMthI. tyAM tArI khurazI upara besane ! tane rileTiva ne riyalanA bhAga pADI ApyA ke A tArI khurazI ne A pelAnI khurazI. praznakartA : rileTiva khurazI upara eTalo majabUta zoka lAgato nathI eTale khabara nathI paDatI. emAM besI ja rahevAya che tyAM. dAdAzrI : hA. paNa e mIThuM lAge, gaLyuM lAge, paNa jIbhe kapAtI hoya jarA. eTale talavAranI dhAra upara madha mUkyuM hoyane, te gaLyuM lAge ne jIbha kapAtI hoya. vacce lhAya baLatI hoya, beu sAthe cAlatuM hoya ! praznakartA : dAdA, rileTiva khurazImAM AMcako lAge che tyAre ekadama UThI javAtuM koIvAra ne dAdA yAda AvI jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa evuM thaI jAya chene eTaluM thoDuMghaNuM UThyAne ! UThavAno bhAva to thayone ! paNa A je svabhAvane oLakhe, te tarata UThI jAya ke A nhoya, A hoya, A bhUlyo. jema ApaNe hAtha aDADIe pelA ilekTrIkanA vAyarane ane zaoNka lAgato hoya to pachI ApaNe zuM kahIe ke joje, tyAM aDIza nahIM. evuM Aneya cetavatA javuM, bivera. te pelA cAraso volTavALAmAM to maraNa thAya paNa A to anaMta avatAranuM maraNa thAya, baLyuM ! eTale moTuM borDa mArI rAkho. AtmA prApta thayo hoya to, nahIM to bahAra to koIne kazuM kahevAya evuM nathI. tamane rileTiva ne riyala khurazI beu khabara paDI gaI che eTale kahevAya. bahAra vAta karIe to emAM bhalIvAra nathI ! para sITamAM lAge mIThAza, paNa.... praznakartA : eTale pelI potApaNAnI sITa upara jatA nathI rahevAnuM, e niraMtara e ja jAgRti rahyA karavI joIe ? dAdAzrI : godA mahIM lAge che, zoka lAge che toya paNa tyAM ja besI rahe che. ilekTrika zoka lAge to tame kheMcI lo ? praznakartA : kheMcI ja le che. dAdAzrI : e kema karyuM ? tyAre kahe, zoka lAge che. evuM A khurazImAM zoka lAgyo. kama Tu dhI ijhI. khabara paDe ke nA paDe ? praznakartA : zoka lAge che. tyAMthI to tarata pAcho khase, paNa have mIThAza UbhI thAya tyAM sITa DAuna thaI jAya. paNa pArakI sITa eTale mIThAza paNa lAge athavA zaoNka lAge evuM paNa bane che.

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106 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : potAnI sITa jaDI gaI eTale pelI baLatarA pachI baMdha thaI gaI enI. dAdAzrI : mAruM to ema ne ema UDI gayeluM. khoDa kADhavI ja nahIM paDIne kazI. loko pUche dAdA, kevI rIte A badhuM thayuM tamAre ? tyAre A gaNita jevuM lAge che kaMI tane ? e sIdhA ja mahIM pesADI de, akrama vijJAna thakI, kama-brama nahIM, thazene have ? sITanuM silekzana, sva-paranuM ! 105 dAdAzrI : mIThAza lAge, paNa zoka to lAgyA vagara rahe ja nahIM. mIThAza hoya toya zoka lAge. UlaTuM puruSone to zaoNka lAge ja, strIone nA lAge. strIo mIThAza hoya tyAM besI rahe. ene zokanI asara nA udbhave. iphekTa khabara nA paDe. praznakartA : nahIM to e zaoNkavALuM ja che AkhuM. dAdAzrI : e ya zokavALuM che ane e ya zaoNkavALuM che. peluM zauka puruSone amuka bAbatamAM lAge, amuka lokone strI jevo ocho hoya tene ! ane strInA jevA raMga-rAga hoyane to eneya nA khabara paDe. upAdhi ja che, amane to sekanDavAra sahana thatuM nahotuM jJAna thatAM pahelAM. potApaNuM te dahADe ja nIkaLI gayuM, jJAna thatAMnI sAthe. praznakartA : jJAna thayA pachI badhuM potApaNuM UDADI dIdhuM. dAdAzrI : UDADAya nahIMne ? huM zuM karavA UDADuM? enI meLe ja thaI gayuM. praznakartA: tame potAnI sITamAM besI gayA eTale peluM badhuM enI meLe UDI gayuM. dAdAzrI : huM beTho ja nathI. e to jarA ArAma karavA gayo hato. te joDavALAne kahyuM'tuM, coviyAranA vAsaNa dhoI Ava. gADImAM coviyAra karI lIdho hato. e to enI meLe ja thaI gayuM. mane loko pUche, zI rIte ? meM kahyuM, A gaNita che kaMI, A badhuM ! dhIsa Ijha baTa necarala. A iphekTa che, hoya kaoNjha !! praznakartA : Apa kaho chone, jJAna thatAM pahelAM ja mAre potApaNuM jarAya sahana nhotuM thatuM, e sITa.. dAdAzrI : jJAna thayuM ne e UDI gayuM. potApaNuM ja sahana thatuM hotuM eka sekanDeya. sukha hoya ke du:kha hoya, e baLyuM, kaDavuM jhera jevuM lAge. hIrAbA ya ekalAM jANe ke Amane badhuM kaDavuM ja lAge. potAnI sITa thaI kyAre kahevAya ke pAMca AjJA pALo tyAre, ekjhakTa. praznakartA : e pALe tyAre potAnI sITa para AvyA kahevAya. dAdAzrI : e A AjJA e ja potAnI sITa che ne AjJAnI bahAra gayA ke bIjI pelI sITa upara besI jAya. A ijhI ane pelI anaijhI ! saheja anaijhImAM jAva ke zoka lAgyo. ahIM zoka lAge tarata, kheMcI le. ahIM zauka ene samajAto nathI. atyAra sudhI zoka lAgavAnI Teva paDI gayelIne ! zenI Teva paDelI che ? praznakartA : e zaoNka e ja vastu karekTa mAnelI. dAdAzrI : te A to suMvALo bahune, saheja duHkha thAya to sahana nA thAya. e meM kahyuMne, tyAre tarata UThI javA mAMDyo. mArI gerahAjarI enAthI sahana thatI nhotI. eTale pachI A kahyuM ke AmAM raheje. pachI AmAM rahevA mAMDyo. praznakartA : pote potAnI sITa para nA Ave, to tyAM sudhI pelI pArakI sITa upara tyAM chene ? evuM kharuMne ? dAdAzrI : e khoLavuM ja nahIM, enI meLe tyAM ja hoya. e to kudarata ja besADI dene ! tAre khoLavAnuM nahIM. na chUTake to besADI de, to besavuM. praznakartA : paNa tyAMthI pote UThIne potAnI sITa para besavuM. dAdAzrI : A puruSArtha ne peluM vyavasthita. nizcaya joIze ane peluM

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sITanuM silekzana, sva-paranuM ! 107 vyavahAra to che ja, vyavasthitamAM. ane te vyavahAra-nizcayanA jene bheda pADyA nathI, tene mATe A vyavahAra ne A nizcaya. ApaNA mATe vyavahAranizcaya nathI. ApaNA mATe ekaluM nizcaya ja che. je gAma javAnuM tenI ja bhAMjagaDa, bIjI zI ApaNane bhAMjagaDa ? ane tuM zuM kahuM chuM ke vyavahAra sAcavavo ja paDazene ? 108 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jJAta samajAyuM te judo te pote judo ! praznakartA : ghaNuM sAruM lAgyuM, dAdA. dAdAzrI : ke gUMcavADo koI jagyAe Ubho thayo ? praznakartA : jarAya nahIM. cokhkhuM thayuM. dAdAzrI : UlaTo gUMcavADo hato te cokhkho thayo, nahIM ? te eno khyAla rAkhajo have. praznakartA : nA, e sAcavavAnuM nahIM, paNa e vyavahAra enI meLe banI ja javAnone tyAM. dAdAzrI : e thayA ja karavAnuM. hamaNAM nA gamato hoya toya thayA karavAno, kaoNjha karyA che eTale iphekTa AvyA vagara raheze ? parIkSA ApI che, e pAsa ke nApAsanuM rijhalTa to Avaze ja ne !? chUTako che ? praznakartA H eTale pote pelI sITa uparathI khasI gayA, pachI paNa pelo vyavahAra to banyA ja kare che pelI bAja. dAdAzrI : pachI banyA kare. tame khasI jAva eTalI ja vAra. UlaTuM nathI khasato tethI bagaDyo che. praznakartA H eTale eka khurazI tyAM che ane eka khurazI ahIM evuM hoya che ema ? A khurazImAM besuM to pelI khurazI khAlI rahIne eka jagyAe evuM hoya che ema ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : khyAla rAkhajo. sAMbhaLanAro judo, khyAla nahIM rAkhanAro jado ne tame judA pAchA. eTale A ame kahyuM ke khyAla rAkhajo. kAraNa ke ame jANIe AgaLanuM, Ane kahenAra koNa che te ! ane tamAre e bhAMjagaDamAM paDavuM ja nA paDe. tame to A dAdAnA kahyA pramANe cAlo. caMdubhAIne tamAre kahevuM "ame' joIe ne tame dAdAnA kahyA pramANe cAlyA karo. 'tame khyAla rAkhajo' kaho, enA karatAM 'dAdAe kahyuM evo khyAla rAkhajo' kahIe. tamAre e locA paDatuM jJAna kADhI nAkhyuM. peluM tame caMdubhAIne kaho ke 'khyAla rAkhajo'. eTale pAcho kahe ke e kahenAra koNa ahIMyAM ? evo prazna Ubho thAyane ? pachI mahIM pUchene ke koNa A kahe che ? tame kaho, huM kahuM chuM. paNa huM koNa ? eTale A dAdA kahe che emAM vAMdho nahIM. dAdAnA nAmathI kADhI nAkho. dAdAnI javAbadArI para che. paNa dAdA pote javAbadArI samajIne pote chUTuM karIne ja bole che. nA samajAyuM tamane pUruM ? mane lAge che mArA kahevAno bhAvArtha nathI pahoMcyo ? dAdAzrI : pelI to rahevAnI ja. ApaNe chUTako ja nahIM, kudarata besADe tyAM, ApaNI icchA nA hoya toya. praznakartA : eTale tyAMthI UThavAno e puruSArtha karavAno che. dAdAzrI : hA, AnaMda thavAno hoya to besADe agara duHkha thavAnuM hoya toya besADe, vyavasthitamAM. eTale ApaNe to e sITane aDyuM ke tyAM samajI javuM, A hoya mArI sITa, kiMcitmAtra anuijhI nA hoya. ijhI ! huM zuM kahevA mAMgu chuM te vAta samajAya chene ? praznakartA : samajAyuM, dAdA. dAdAzrI : TheTha sudhI ? hasatAM nathIne tame. samajaNa paDe eTale hase.

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sITanuM silekzana, sva-paranuM ! 109 praznakartA : eTale tame kaho chone, te mahIM jouM chuM. barAbara samajAyuM ke nA samajAyuM ema joto hato. dAdAzrI : samajAyuM ? praznakartA: haMa. samajAyuM, dAdA. dAdAzrI : e samajAyuM teya judo ane tame judA. praznakartA : hA, eneya jovAnuM che. samajAyuM teya ApaNe nhoya, dAdA. dAdAzrI : A badhuM ene phUlasTopa mAnIne beso, zuM thAya enuM ? praznakartA : bahu mAra paDe, dAdA. dAdAzrI : A badhAMne jonAra tuM chuM. praznakartA : eTale A badhuM ja saravALe mAInasa karavAnuM, "A huM hoya, huM nhoya, huM hoya' eTale pachI meM evuM belensa rAkhyuM che ke eTale A sITa mArI hoya' kahIne e khasI gayA, paNa pachI tarata ApaNI sITa je jANanAranI che te sITamAM besI javAnuM. eTale eka taraphI sAyakolojI nA thAya. [16] pote potAne Thapako gharamAM to eka jevuM joIene ? jAgRta thaI gayo AtmA, eTaluM ja joIe ApaNe. tAre jAgRta thayo che ? dAdAzrI : to te ghaDIe AnaMda raheto hoya to jANavuM ke ApaNe karekTa raste chIe ! praznakartA H hA. dAdAzrI : cAlo ! have paheluM to gharamAM kleza-kaMkAsa kazuM rahevuM nA joIe. kAraNa ke tame zuddhAtmA thaI gayA ane caMdubhAI judA. caMdubhAI che te vAipha joDe kazuMka akaLAtA hoya tyAre caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'zuM kAma Ama karo cho ! AkhI jIMdagI AvuM ne AvuM karyuM." tamAre tamArI jAtane Thapako ApavAno. sAmasAmI Thapako ApIene to kleza thAya ane tamAre caMdubhAIne kahevuM, nA phAve ? caMdubhAIne kahevuM, 'Ama zuM karavA karo cho ? gharamAM to eka phemili ApaNuM !' khoTuM thAya tyAM Thapako Apavo joIe. khabho thAbaDIe ne Thapako ApIe. pAcho khabho thAbaDIe ne kahIe, 'ame tArI joDe chIe'. ema karatuM karatuM rAge AvI jAya. tame je karo cho te agharuM che, jyAre A paddhatisara AvI jAva to saheluM hoya che badhuM. A to gUMcavADAvALuM karo cho. e to badhuM bahu

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112 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) pote potAne Thapako 111 vakhata karyuM. atyAre rahevA done e gUMcavADo. gUMcavADo e agharuM kahevAya. vakhate bahu hoya to ApaNe Thapako Apavo ke 'caMdubhAI, kema Ama tophAna mAMDyA che ? A lakSaNa sArA kahevAya ? Ama zuM karo cho ?" paNa ApaNA hAthamAM kazuM sattA ja nathIne ? paNa ApaNe chUTA paDI gayA. ApaNe jJAtA-draSTA. pADozI tarIke salAha ApIe eTaluM ja. mAlikI ja nahIMne ! mAlikI hoya to ja javAbadArI hoyane ? A 'no risponsibiliTI. caMdubhAI je je kare tenI risponsibiliTI tamArI nahIM, evI rIte to A jJAna ApyuM che. ThapakArI jAtane jora jorathI ! A zuddhAtmAno bhAga. pachI A caMdubhAInA bhAgane oLakho kharA ke? koNa AvyuM emAM? temAM phAIla naMbara vana, nahIM ? e pachI phAIla naMbara vanamAM zuM zuM mAla bharelo che e badho khabara paDe kharo ? praznakartA : khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : ema ? to e mAla che te pudgala pakSano. ene jAo pA kalAka bahAra besIne kaho. 'caMdubhAI, tuM yujhalesa che, nAlAyaka che, badamAza che, harAmakhora che, ahita karanAra cho.' jAva, pA kalAka badhuM bola bola karo, mahIM AtmA judo. amArI AjJA chene ! paNa kayA pakSane vaDho cho e jANavuM joIe, nahIM to pAchuM bIjA pakSane ja vaDhI devAya. tame AnaMda mANyo. A icchA karatAM ya vadhAre AnaMda che. jo pA kalAka karo to pA kalAka ne pacAsa miniTa karo to olarAITa ane pAchA kAne saMbhaLAya evuM bolavuM paDe. nA hoya to agAzImAM jaIne bolo, jAva. tijadoSotI pratIti thaye pragati ! praznakartA : Ape je bolavAnuM kahyuM badhuM, paNa mahIM mane potAne pratIti thavI joIe ke 'huM badamAza chuM' ema ? Ape eka kalAka bolavAnuM kahyuM, paNa e je jyAM sudhI pratIti nA thAya e mikenikala bolavAno artha kharo, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : pratIti ja nathI thaI ? praznakartA : mane evuM lAge 'huM sAro chuM' ema. dAdAzrI : nA, paNa loko pAchaLa zuM kahe, A mANasa.... ? praznakartA : badamAza nA kahe, nAlAyaka nA kahe. dAdAzrI : to bhagavAna kahe ?! praznakartA : nA, bhagavAne ya nA kahe. dAdAzrI : tyAre zuM kahe ? bhagavAna nA kahe, badamAza nA kahe, to zuM kahe ? jene je phAve e DigrI nA Ape loko ? praznakartA nA Ape. loko jANene ke badamAzI ke nAlAyakI karatAM nathI. dAdAzrI : lokone kazuM jANavAnI pahelI ja nA hoyane ! A badhAM beThAM chene tuM kahe ke cAlo, bahAra jAva ne tuM aMdara besI rahuM. eTale zuM kahe ? 'nAlAyaka, badamAza mANasa che' kaheze A. tane khabara ja nathI, duniyA zuM kahe che ? mane to A badhAM zuM kaheze, tarata samajAya. praznakartA: dAdA, Ave khabara paDene pachI karavAnI jarA majhA Ave. nahIM to peluM mikenikala bolI jauM, emAM pachI eTalo ukela nA Ave. dAdAzrI : e to barobara che. e tArI vAta kharI che e, paNa amArI pAse to vAta hala Ave ke loko AvuM bole che. kAraNa ke lokone je phAve evo abhiprAya Apane ! e kaMI ochuM kaMI kAyadesara lakheluM che ke bhaI, Ama ja abhiprAya Apajo. ' are, mAre mATe hau abhiprAya Apene, saMsAramAM miniTa chuM nahIM, toya abhiprAya Apane ke "naMgoDa mUA che' kaheze. te huM jANuMya kharo ke AvuM kahe che. eTale meM kaheluM aMbAlAlane, ke tame naMgoDa to mUA cho. loka kahe che, e nA kahevuM paDe emane ? praznakartA : kahevuM paDe, loka kahe e kahevuM paDe.

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pote potAne Thapako 113 114 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ame to eTale sudhI bolatA, 'nAlAyaka, badamAza, ghara khAlI karIne nIkaLa. cala !" pachI ghara khAlI karAvIe nahIM. e kahe ke, "bhaIsA'ba tamAre tAbe !" tyAre kahIe, rahe bA." ApaNe hiMsaka nathI. ahiMsakahiMsaka chIe. enuM ya nukasAna nA kare ne ApaNuM nukasAna nA kare ! have bolIzane? "ApI daIza barobara. tuM to kaMI samajato haze paNa ! kaMI bIjo nyAyAdhIza koI bole nahIM. sahu sahunA pagAra pUratA ja nyAyAdhIza che. vakIlAta pUratAM ja bole che. koNa AvuM cokhkhuM bole ? praznakartA: koI nA bole. dAdAzrI : haMa. tyAra pachI eTale ame tane A zIkhavADIe. amArA zabda upareya vizvAsa rAkhIne karato hoya to vAMdho nahIM. praznakartA : nA, dAdA. e to meM kahyuM ke ApanA zabda upara vizvAsa che e pramANe karuM paNa pelI pratitI thaI hoyane to e bahu phera paDe ? dAdAzrI : hA, e vAta mane gamI. paNa have tane lAge chene ke naMgoDa chuM ? praznakartA : tame kahyuM eTale samajAyuM. dAdAzrI : haMa. ame hau 'nAlAyaka chuM, naphaphaTa chuM, badamAza chuM" Ama tema e kahIene badhuM. to naphaphaTAI jAya, badamAzI jAya. nahIM to jAya ke ? dudha pAIne sApa ucheryo ne have muA amArI sAmo thauM chuM ? haMa eTaluM to nA kahevuM paDe ? dAMta pADI nA nAkhavA joIe ? praznakartA : mArI naMkhAya. dAdAzrI : pachI enuM jhera kADhI ene rAkhI melavAnA. dAMta to kADhI nAkhavA paDe. kAraNa ke potAnuM ya ahita kare ne ApaNuM ya ahita kare. bannenuM ahita kare. pachI mArI nAkhavAnuM nahIM ApaNe. kAraNa ke eno nikAla karavAno. ApaNe ja UbhuM kareluM chene A. mATe teno samabhAve nikAla karavAno che, paNa pahelAM dAMta pADI nAkhavA paDe. pachI dUdha pAIe to ene jhera AvavAnuM ja nahIM tyAM. have pratIti thaI ? thayuM tyAre, jA tyAre kalAka karI Ava. ane caMdubhAIne sAruM saMbhaLAya evuM bolaje, badhA sAMbhaLe mahIM aMdaravALA ane pahelethI kahevuM ke 'pudgalapakSI, virodhapakSI, pudgalapakSI eTale virodhapakSI, he ahaMkAra, he mana, he buddhi, he citta badhAM sAMbhaLo, he pAMca indriyo, karmendriyo, jJAnendriyo ane agiyAramuM mana badhAM sAMbhaLo. he labADo, he naMgoDA, he badamAzo badhAM sAMbhaLo. pachI A badho Akho pudgalapakSane vagovI mAravAno. tame ja A amAruM ahita karyuM." jaldI jAva, sarasa upAya nIkaLI gayo. puNyazALI chuM, mahApuNyazALI chuM ! e to uttamamAM uttama davA. hamaNAM pelo kalAka karI Avaze ne bahu uttama davA. dAdAzrI : zAstrakAro eTale anubhavIo, zAstrakAroe zuM kahyuM ? jIvamAtra jIvavA hAru jhera pIve che. jIvavuM che vadhAre ane pIve che jhera. ene zI rIte samajaNa paDe ? pIdheluM koI dahADo e ? praznakartA : e ja pItA hatA. kharAba kAma karIe ne uparathI abhimAna karIe pAchAM. dAdAzrI : have badhAM kharAba kAmane saMbhArIne haMa, ripera karI Ava. 'AvAM ja karma te karyA che haju mane khabara che" ema kahIe. 'tame zA karma karavAmAM bAkI rAkhyA che ?" te mane kaho. praznakartA : e paNa dAdA, e paMdara-vIsa miniTane badale eka kalAka ne have to cAra-cAra, cha-cha kalAka thatA hoya, temAM bahu AnaMda rahe che. badhuMya ekadama sApha thatuM jAya che. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa AvuM A huM tamane dekhADuM paNa karo to ne? praznakartA : karavAnA, dAdA. dAdAzrI : kahevuM, 'tame UMdhuM karavAmAM zuM bAkI rAkhyuM che ? A duniyA to sArI che ke haju tamane sArA kahe che, e ja sArI che.' DhAMkyuM hoya tyAM sudhI sArA kahe. DhAMka DhAMka karIe, emAM dahADo zuM vaLe ? enA karatAM ughADuM karI nAkhone ! dekha leMge. DhAMkIne AbarU rAkhe, ene zuM

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pote potAne Thapako 115 116 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : thaI jAya e to bIjuM paDe che. evAM to hajAra paDa Ave ne koIne be ja paDa hoya paNa tamAre Thapako ApavAno. tame Thapako Apo eTale tame chuTA ne e chUTA. eno anubhava thayo tamane. ane Thapako Apavo ja joIe ApaNe. ane e paDa to AvyA ja karavAnAM. che to Ave ne ! ne nA hoya to zI rIte Ave ? eTale jeTaluM cIkaNuM eTalAM paDa vadhAre. eTale e Thapako ApavAno ke 'AvuM zuM karo cho ?" ApaNe zuddhAtmA, caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'eTalo badho zo tamAro ropha paDI gayo. te ATalI badhI rIsa caDhAvo cho ?" ApaNe caMdubhAIne vaDhIe UlaTA, ApaNe zuddhAtmA, ApaNe zuM levA-devA ? A pelo bhAI vaDhyo hato, ne raDato hato bicAro. to ya e zuM kahe che ke 'have tuM raDIza to ya huM tArAthI kanvinsa nahIM thauM. tane nahIM choDuM huM." e pachI enA doSo jatA rahyA. raDavuM Ave eTalo badho dabaDAvyo ! e to be zabdo kahevA paDe. karavAnuM che ? AbarU to enuM nAma kapaDAM nIkaLI jAya ne AbarU rahe tyAre sAcuM. A dAdAnA kapaDAM ko'ke rastAmAM kADhI lIdhAM to zuM kare ? praznakartA : kazuM nA kare, dAdAne zuM karavAnuM ! dAdAzrI : nA. bhagato hoya to darzana kara kara kare ane bIjAM hase. tyAre huMya hasuMne ! kAraNa ke jene tame nAgA juo cho, tene huMya jouM chuM. maneya hasavuM to Ane baLyuM ke 'zA veSa tamArAM !! juone, capaTI AbarU rAkhavAnA kapaDA hatAM teya kADhI lIdhAM tamArA'. ThapakA sAmAyikanuM adbhuta pariNAma ! eka bhaI AvIne kahe che mane, 'mArAthI evuM khoTuM kArya thaI gayuM che te bhUlAtuM ya nathI.' have jJAna lIdhelo mANasa, bhUlAtuM nathI ne mahIM keDyA kare che ! A kaI jAtanuM ?? meM jJAna ApyuM che ne toya tane AvuM badhuM thAya. tyAre kahe, 'mane AvuM thAya che. hakIkatamAM je thAya che e kahuM chuM." meM kahyuM, 'agAzImAM jaIne tArI phAIla naMbara vanane kaheje.' tyAre kahe, "zuM kahevAnuM ?" 'alyA, tame nAlAyaka cho, badamAza cho, lucco cho, cora cho. sAruM karIne Thapako Apaje, aDadho kalAka. jeNe guno karyo tene ThapakAravA. tuM ThapakAra, jo nA maTe to pachI mArI javAbadArI.' maTI gayuM ! eka ja pherAmAM maTI gayuM. pAMsarI nA thAya to kaiDakAvaje. evuM ene kaheluM eTale pachI e to eNe agAzImAM jaIne zuM karyuM ? bIjI vyaktine jema khakhaDAve tema eTaluM to khakhaDAvyo, paNa ethIya vadhAre khakhaDAvyo. te phAIla raDe ane e jue. khUba raDe. poke poke raDe ne pelo e joyA kare. eTale loka nIcethI jatA-AvatA hoya te kahe che, "alyA, koNa laDhelaDhA kare che ?' are, koNa vaDhe che Ane ?" pachI DAhyo thaI gayo ! praznakartA H have Thapako ApuM chuM, karyA pachI paNa ne karyA pahelAM paNa khyAla AvI jAya. eTale ema thAya ke 'caMdubhAIne A vastu nA zobhe.' paNa thaI jAya. praznakartA : pote dhyAna nA Ape eTale ema ja cAle pachI. dAdAzrI : dhyAna nahIM, ApaNe mananuM cAlavA daIe eTale peluM UMdhuM cAlyA kare. eTale bIjuM koI vaDhe e nA cAle, tAre ja tArI phAIla naMbara vanane vaDhavuM paDe. A to vaDhavAno mArga ja nahIM ne, ame vaDhIe ja nahIMne AvuM ! ame kyAM vaDhIe ? ane kone vaDhIe ame ? tame to zuddhAtmA cho, tamane to amAre vaDhAya nahIM. eTale tamAre caMdubhAIne vaDhavuM paDe, to amAre vaDhavuM paDe nahIM. praznakartA : e vaDhavAnuM kema mana nahIM thatuM hoya ? bIjo koI bhUla kare to ene vaDhI kADhe barobara. dAdAzrI : A to jANatA nathI ne, jANe to vaDhe. bIjAne karato dekhe evuM kare. A to pelo bhAI je AMkho kADhI kADhIne kaheto hato ! e raDI uThyo. praznakartA : e vaDhavAno prayoga bahu suMdara che.

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pote potAne Thapako dAdAzrI : e to bahu nahIM vaDhavuM. e to amane pUchIne vaDhavuM joIe. bIjA badhAne vaDhavAnI jarUra nA paDe. AnA jevAne jarUra paDe. AnI icchA draDha chene ! eTale badhAnI ArapAra nIkaLI jAya evo che. A badhA ya nIkaLI jAya, rasto jaDI jAya. 117 TaiDakAvanAra TaiDakAvyA kare che ne raDanAra raDyA kare che. moTI ajAyabIne !! pachI meM bIjA lokone kaheluM ke AvuM TaiDakAvazo nahIM. mane pUchyA sivAya koI TaiDakAvavA nA jazo. ame AjJA ApIe to ja e karavAnuM. kAraNa ke jokhama che A to. pAMsaTha varSanA A vakIla thayelA mANasa, ene TaiDakAvatAM zuM zuM dAvo mAMDI de e kahevAya nahIMne ? praznakartA : dAdA, atyAre e bhAI AvyA'tAne e kahetAM'tA ke phAIla naMbara eka eTalI badhI bhaDakI gaI che ne ke have ADuM karatI ja nathI. dAdAzrI : hA, e bhaDakI jAyane ! ene TaiDakAvanAra koI maLyuM ja nathI ane je TaiDakAve tenI para dAvA mAMDe che, kleima kare che. jJAnI puruSa jo jabarajasta TaiDakAvene to ahIMthI ja enuM hiteya choDIne jato rahe. mATe e ApaNe pote ja TaiDakAvIe, to kyAM jatAM rahe e ? praznakartA : dAdA, A badhAM moTA mANasonuM AvuM ja hoya che. ene koI TaiDakAvanAruM nahIM, koI kahenAra nahIM. dAdAzrI : koI kahenAra nA hoya. vAta kharI che. eTale kahenAra joIe mAthe. paNa eNe to je vaDhyo che, e to badhAM sajjaDa thaI gayA ane phAIla raDI tyAre kahe che, '2DIne trAgAM karuM chuM ? tuM zuM samajuM chuM ?" te jANe AtmA sAva judo ja paDI gayelo. have Avo prayoga to bIjI jagyAe hoya nahIM. Avo prayoga bIjI jagyAe hoya ? dholo hau mArI bese ! Ama potAnA gAla para dholo ThokI dIdhI !! praznakartA : dAdA, caMdulAlane arIsA sAme rAkhIne barAbara mAravA joIe, to Ane barAbara khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : nA, e badhuM tamArAM mATe. A badhA mATe to AvuM sthULa joIe. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : dAdA, jarUra paDe, AvI ghaNI vakhata jarUra paDe. dAdAzrI : barobara che. paNa khUba rAge pADI dIdhI. phAIla rAge pADI dIdhI. gAMThatI ja nahotI. mane kahe, "dAdA, phAIla eka gAMThatI nathI.' meM kahyuM, 'nA zuM gAMThe ? jA, mAruM nAma daIne mAra. TaiDakAva barobara.' dAdAnA kahyA pramANe cAlavAnuM che. tuM koNa mUo chuM ? have to tane badhuM rAge pADI dauM.' khUba TaiDakAvyo. 118 praznakartA : dAdA, evuM kaMI karavuM hoya to pahelAM tamArI pAse AvIne karavuM to barAbara eno phAyado, lAbha thAya kharuMne ? dAdAzrI : e AzIrvAda ApIene pachI tamAre zuM ? kAraNa ke huM AzIrvAda ApuMne, te AtmA ekalo ja hoya. eTale prazAzakti ekalI ja kAma kare. nahIM to bIjuM mahIM joDe joDe koI coMTI gayuM hoya to vepa thaI paDe. vaDho tyAre virodhapakSavALA judA paDI jAya. A to virodhapakSanI pATalI upara besavuM che ane sarakArane vagovavI che. virodhapakSanI pATalIe bese e pUrvakarmanA AdhAre. paNa virodhapakSanA abhiprAyamAM rahevuM ke nA rahevuM e Ajano puruSArtha che. eTale ApaNe sarakArane(AtmAne) ja abhiprAya Apavo joIe. virodhapakSamAM besIne paNa sarakArane mata Ape tyAre jANavuM ke have AtmAbhaNI vaLyo. AtmapakSanA raho. bhale beThA cho sAmA pakSamAM. te pUrvakarmane AdhIna che. kahenAra koNa che ? kone kahe che ? e je jANe che te zuddhAtmA saMpUrNa che. kahe che koNa ? e prajJA samiti. kone kahe che ? ajJA samitine. ajJA samitimAM ahaMkAra, krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha. e samiti judI. A samiti judI. eka kalAka guMThANuM AvuM caMdubhAIne Thapako Ape, to bolo, enI zakti keTalI vadhI jAya !! Ama TaiDakAvo jAtane ! bIjAne karavAnI nA pADelI meM. ame AjJA ApIe tene ja

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120 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : dAdA, Apa kahetA'tA ke agAzImAM jaIne vaDhavuM. cheka eTaluM lAMbe zA mATe javuM ? ahIMyA arIso hoya, enI sAme joIne ja vaDhI zakAyane ? pote potAne Thapako 119 karavAnuM A. bIjAe nahIM karavAnuM. zIkhavAnuM nahIM A. ame to jene AjJA ApIe, jenA karma bahu cIkaNA ane bhAre hoya tyAre ene kahIe. bIjA badhAMne nA hoya A to, tamAre to jovAnuM. phakta ko'ka dahADo ekAda zabda haju kaiDakAvAya. 'caMdulAla zuM samajo cho ?" "caMdulAla zuM samaje che tArA manamAM ? Aje sAMje jamavAnuM nahIM maLe tamane, jo A bahu vAMkA cAlazo to' evuM kahevAya ApaNAthI. - A upAya ame batAvyA. paNa ame bIjA lokone upAya karavAnI nA kahIe chIe. amane pUchyA sivAya nA karazo. e ame tamane AzIrvAda ApIne mokalIe to karAya. nahIM to vaLI kaMI UMdhuM thaI jaze. A upAya ame bIjAne karavAnI nA kahIe. e to enuM khAtuM vasamuM hatuM eTale e kare. jAtate vaDhavAtI khape tAkAta ! tame kazuM tamArI phAIla naMbara vanane kahyuM ? ekAMtamAM vahyA ke ? praznakartA : hajI nathI karyuM. dAdAzrI : to karone have, kaMIka karone ! praznakartA : Aje huM vicAra karIza. dAdAzrI : A vicAra karavAno ? vicAra kare che te phAIla naMbara vana kare che. tamArAmAM vicAra zakti che nahIM. praznakartA : vaDhavAnI tAkAta AvavI joIene evI ! dAdAzrI : tAkAta kema nA Ave te ! meM kahyuM hoya ke A tame have maracAMnI caTaNI khAzo nahIM ane maracAMnuM zAka nA khAva to tamane tAkAta nA Ave ? praznakartA: tame nA pADo to nA khauM ! dAdAzrI : to evI tAkAta hoya ke nahIM ? huM kahuM eTale tamArI tAkAta hoya ja ne ! huM kahuM eTale tAkAta AvI gaI. dAdAzrI : nA, paNa agAsImAM jaIne karene to e zaramAya nahIM. nahIM to ahIM zaramAyA karaze. ene evuM che ne, pAvara AtmA to che ja ne mahIM. mizracetana che e. haju ene Ama zaramAvAnA, Dipresa thaI javAnA badhA guNa che enAmAM. eTale ApaNe pachI badhAMyanI rUbarUmAM kahIe to AbarU jatI rahe enI ane upara jaIne dhamakAvIe to e jANe ke koI che nahIM. to cho ne kahe, ApaNe cAlo, pharIzuM. phare kharAM paNa. phare cokkasa. kAraNa ke koI kahenAruM maLyuM nahotuM. kahenAra hoya tyAre ApaNe rakSA karIe pAchAM ke 'tuM zuM samajuM chuM. ame kaMI jevA tevA chIe !' praznakartA : to badhA satsaMgIonI hAjarImAM kahevuM ke nA kahevuM? dAdAzrI : nA, badhAnI sAme ApaNe zuM karavA AbarU kADhavI ? ApaNe agAzImAM jaIne sIdhuM ja. 'zuM tame kevA mANasa cho, A te kaMI rIta che ?' samajI jarA DaphanAvIe eTale eya samajI jAya ke have e emanI joDe rItasaranuM rahevuM paDaze, nahIM to sAluM A kADhI mele. kyAre kADhI mele e kahevAya nahIM ? caMdubhAIne TaiDakAvavA paDaze ? gharamAM koI nA hoya te ghaDIe TaiDakAvajo, hoM. pAchI caMdubhAInI AbarU nA jAya. vAipha nA hoya e vakhate TaiDakAvajo ane kharA mANasa to vAiphanI hAjarImAM TaiDakAve, hoMke ? joI lo, majA pachI. judA thayA eTale to thAya, upAya che A badhA. judA nA hoya to to upAya ja nahIM ? eDajasTa thAya evo lAge che tamane ? eno niveDo lAvavo joIe pachI, eklA hoya tyAre TeDakAvavuM. huM pachI badhAnI hAjarImAM boluM te juduM pAchuM. huM to nIrubenanI hAjarI toya boluM. zuM boluM ?

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pote potAne Thapako 121 122 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) 'aMbAlAlabhaI konTrAkTara, tame kevAM mANasa cho ?! zuM tame mAnI beThA cho potAnI jAtane ?" nIrubena kahe, 'tame vAto karo cho ?" tyAre meM kahyuM, 'zuM karuM tyAre ? badhI vAta kaMI khAnagImAM ochI thAya che ? praznakartA : dAdA, tame nirbhadIne eTale. bheda vagaranA eTale tame chUTA paDIne bolo. dAdAzrI : che ja chUTuM. meM chUTuM ja karI ApyuM che. tadna chUTuM karyuM. have tame eno upayoga nA karo to... praznakartA : e Thapako ApavA mATe amArI tAkAta nathI hotI. dAdAzrI : nA, paNa Thapako Apone, mAruM nAma daIne. dAdAe kahyuM che. have Thapako ApavAnA chIe. jozathI ThapakAro. 'zuM samaje che ? khoTAM kAma kare che. pAcho mane zaramAvuM chuM, joDe joDe pAcho UlaTo mArI AbarU bagADe che tuM !" huM tamane kahuM chuM, 'tamane aDyuM nathI." tyAre tame kaho cho, 'nA mane aDyuM.' praznakartA : eTalo dehAdhyAsa rahe che ne, eTale ? dAdAzrI : nahIM, pahelAno dehAdhyAsa, e Adata che, e Adata jaldI chUTe nahIM, te zuM thAya pachI ? te Adata chUTe nahIM. eTalA sAru ame A rIte kahIe. A to vijJAna che AkhuM. game evAM karmanAM udaya Ave to sekanDeya tamane koI paNa karma naDe nahIM. paNa mane pUchI jAva to cAle. mane pUchI jAva ke huM gUMcAyo chuM ahIM AgaLa, to huM taiyAra ja chuM. paNa te ekalo ekalo doDha DAhyo thayA kare, to huM zuM karuM? tame enI joDe besI raho aDIne, paNa vaDhIe eTale enI meLe thAya chUTA. thoDuM samajAya evI vAta che ke ? have roja tamAre evo Thapako nA Apavo, raDe evuM, paNa amathA amathA jarAka roja kahe kahe karIe, jema sAsue kacakaca karavA mAMDI eTale vahu samajI jAya ke AmanI joDe meLa nahIM paDe ApaNe. sAsu vAta vAtamAM kacakaca kare eTale vahu samajI jAyane ke "eno meLa nahIM paDe. have AmanI joDe juduM thavAno rasto karo !' eTale tamAre caMdubhAI joDe vAta karavI joIe. pachI jevo joIe evo AnaMda nA jAyane ! e AnaMda jaze nahIM paNa vadhaze enAthI, pelo AnaMda ora vadhe. praznakartA : e ja AnaMda prApta karavo che. dAdAzrI : paNa AvuM karI jojo ne tame. A ame kahyuMne, evuM roja babbe-traNa-cAra vakhata Thapako ApatA jajone ! bAtharUmamAM kahevuM, 'tame tamArI jAtane sArA kaho paNa tame to cho nAgA.'. e kahevAmAM vAMdho zuM? doSa dekhe te hoya 'tame' ! eTale manane kaMTALo nA Ave evI rIte vArApharatI pheraphAra karavo paDe. vidhi bolavI, maMtro bolavA. manane ApaNe khorAka na ApIe to e ApaNane khAI jAya. eTale ene mahIM khorAka nAkhavo ja paDe ApaNe. pelAmAM to khorAka maLyA ja kare ema ne ema. pelo kazuM bole, te pahelAM ApaNe sAmuM ApI daIe, eTale pachI manane khorAka maLyA ja kare. paNa AmAM kayo khorAka maLe ? AmAM moTethI ApI devAnuM hoya nahIM ne ? praznakartA: paNa manamAM, vicArothI to sAmuM apAI ja jAya ne ? dAdAzrI : kevA vicAro ? praznakartA : avaLA vicAro, sArA vicAro, badhA vicAro. Ama manathI huM ApI dauM chuM. dAdAzrI : arere ! hajI AvuM thAya che ! mArI joDe raho cho to ya ! zuM dazA thAya ! manathI ApyuM eTale to pratikramaNa kare loko ! praznakartA : A to kahuM chuM ke AvuM thAya che. eTale Apane kahuM chuM. dAdAzrI : AvuM thAya, te tamane kyAM thAya che ? paNa tame mAthe laI

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pote potAne Thapako 123 124 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) lo cho ! enI khoTI asara paDe UlaTI ! caMdulAlane AvuM thAya che. te ApaNe vaDhIe, pachI Thapako ApIe. dareka phero AvuM kare ke tarata kahI devuM, "akkala nathI, zarama nathI AvatI ?" praznakartA : e huM laDuM chuM paNa chUTuM rahetuM nathI. dAdAzrI : paNa tame to kaho cho ne, "mane AvuM thAya che eTale tame mAthe ja lIdhuM ne ! sahI karIne ! "caMdulAlane AvuM thAya che" ema kahevuM paDe. praznakartA H hA, evuM kahIza. dAdAzrI : mAthe lo cho eTale pahoMcyuM. praznakartA : mane juduM nathI rahetuM e, zuM karuM huM? dAdAzrI : e chUTuM ja rahe che. tame jANo cho eTale chUTuM ja kahevAyane ! chUTA vagara jANe koNa ? jANanAra ane bolanAra be judA hoya che. eTale chUTuM ja rahe che. AtmA tamAro judo rahe che. tamane nA samajaNa dAdAzrI : thaI jAya che, e tamane thaI jAya che, baLyuM ? nA. tame tamArA hisAbathI mAnI beso cho. bAkI loko to badhA potAnA manamAM samajI ja jAya ! jagata AkhAne khabara paDe nahIM ke caMdubhAIne zuM thaI jAya che ane tamane to khabara paDe. eTale AtmA tamAro judo che ja. A to joDe raho cho to ye TAIma badho nakAmo jAya che. kyAM sudhI AvA gothAM khAyA karazo ?! nahIM to pele raste ApaNe cAlo, huM tamane e bIjo rasto dekhADIza. paNa te tame bhekha bAMdhyo che A bAjuno, to tamAruM kAma thaI jAya evuM che. paDI ? praznakartA : paDe ne ! mane sAmAnA koInAmAM zuddhAtmA nathI dekhAtA. dAdAzrI : e zuddhAtmA dekhAtA nathI, teno vAMdho nathI. praznakartA : zuddhAtmA dekhAto hoya to doSa ja nA jouM ne ? A to mane sAmAno doSa ja dekhAya che. dAdAzrI : doSa to caMdulAla jue. vaLI tame kyAM juo cho ? AvAM gAMDAM kADha kADha karo ! vaLI doSo juo, te caMdulAla jotA hoya to ApaNe vaDha vaDha karIe eTale chUTuM thaI gayuM, pachI vAMdho nathI. jema jema ApaNe vaDhIe tema AtmA majabUta thato jAya. ane ema kahe ke jo mane AvuM thAya che ? to AtmA roLAI jAya. praznakartA : mAre evuM karavuM to che ja nahIM ne ! paNa A to je thaI jAya che e kahuM chuM Apane. praznakartA : rasto to A ja pakaDavAno che, bIjo rasto mane zuM kAmamAM AvavAno ?! mAre bhaktimArgamAM nathI javuM. dAdAzrI : to nA javuM. paNa A karavuM joIe ne, huM kahuM chuM tema. praznakartA : te to karuM ja ne ! ane joDe joDe je thAya che e pachI huM tamane kahuM chuM. dAdAzrI : paNa AtmA judo rahe che ja nahIM. doSa jue che te caMdulAla jue. jeTaluM jeTaluM UMdhuM kare e badhuM caMdulAlanuM ane chatuM kare eya caMdubhAI kare, jANanAra tame. eka phero zIkhavADyA pachI evI samajaNa nA paDe, baLyuM ? ke A sAsu ne A vahu, bebhAnapaNuM kema thaI jAya che? pachI huM gUMcAI jauM chuM, kaheze. eka phero kahyuM tuMne ke A sAsu thAya ne A tamArI vahu thAya. tame AvuM nA karazo. mArI pAse tame dhyeya moTo bAMdhyo ane pAra nIkaLe evuM che. pote kADhI zake ema che. paNa A nahIM jANe, kema paheluM AvaraNa ja khasatuM nathI !! e pAvara joIe pAra nIkaLavAno. praznakartA : e pAvara zuM hoya emAM ? dAdAzrI : nizcaya. ene moha-boha kazuM naDe nahIM evo nizcaya. Ane nizcaya, jabarajasta nizcaya kahevAya Amano. AvuM to meM joyo ja

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pote potAne Thapako 125 126 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) nathI nizcaya. jagata to AkhuM phasAyeluM ja hoya. A phasAyelAM kharAM, paNa nIkaLI jAya. praznakartA : pheMkI devAnI zakti kharI. dAdAzrI : jabarajasta zakti. tethI huM elAu karuMne ke bhaI, barobara che, paNa jo mArA kahyA pramANe AgaLa khasatA ja nA hoya ! A to jAgRti ATalI hovA chatAM A vahune sAsu kahIe, to sAsu zuM kahe ? jatI rahe ghare tAre ! praznakartA sAsune vahu ane vahune sAsu evuM kema thaI jatuM haze ? dAdAzrI : eTaluM badhuM hiMsakabhAva gADha thaI gayelo. praznakartA : kevA prakArano hiMsakabhAva ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkArano. jabarajasta ahaMkAra. badhAmAM pahelo naMbara ane kapaTa bahu ne ! praznakartA : e badhuM rAge paDI javAnuM ? dAdAzrI : e kyAre rahe ? dareka phero pote AtmA thaIne caMdulAlane vaDhe to pachI e prekTisamAM AvI jAya. paNa e karatAM ja nathI ne ! amArA kahyA pramANe kare ne to huM sapATAbaMdha AgaLa laI jauM.. praznakartA : Ape kazuM koIne sevA soMpI hoya ane mane nA gamI hoya to tarata mahIM UbhuM thAya ! dAdAzrI : "mane nA gamyuM" kahe, te caMdulAlane mAravA ke tamane be dhola mArIza. "mane nA gamyuM" evuM bolo to AvuM badhuM gAMDuM ja bole che. meDa ja lAge che mane. praznakartA : pachI mane mahIM avaLuM batAve. dAdAzrI : are, batAve to tamAruM zuM gayuM te ? tame zuddhAtmA, jonAra tame ane e dekhADanAra. praznakartA : pachI huM caMdubhAIne laDuM. dAdAzrI : laDa laDa karatAM hoya to chUTuM paDI jAya. praznakartA : paNa laDyA pachI koI vAra mahIM je avaLuM cAlatuM hoya to Diprezana AvatuM hoya e nA ye Ave ne koIvAra AvI ye jAya. dAdAzrI : Diprezana kone Ave paNa ? pelAne Ave to sAruM, UlaTuM DhIlA thaI jAya. eTale tame mArA kahyA pramANe rAkho to tamane sarasa rasto batAvI dauM. praznakartA : ekadama sAyanTiphika eproca che. dAdAzrI : hA, sAyanTiphika eproca che. paNa te AvuM ne AvuM karyA kare che. "mane Diprezana AvyuM ?" paNa kone Diprezana AvyuM ? e vahune ke sAsune ? bhAna ja nathI. amArI vANI che ne, amArI samaja evI che ne, e jo pakaDI letA hoyane, to mahIM chUTuM thaI jAya. e to mahIM bole che, te e ja kahe che ke mane AvuM thaI gayuM. eTale pachI ekAkAra thaI jAya tarata. A to caMdulAla kahe che, temAM pote pariNAma pAme che. ApaNe to caMdulAla kahe che, tene 'joyA' karavuM joIe. ane caMdulAlane vaDhavuM joIe UlaTuM ke, "zuM A kheMcAkheMca kare che te ? zarama nathI AvatI ? A to badhAnI pAse huM Ama karI lauM, huM Ama karI lauM.' ene e potAne jItelA mAne che. ApaNe vAreghaDIe Thapako Apavo, caMdulAla karatA hoya te. praznakartA : caMdulAla kheMca rAkhe to bhale rAkhe, ApaNe chUTA rahIe to zuM vAMdho che ? pote kheMcathI chUTA thaI jAyane, to kheMca enI meLe kharI paDe. dAdAzrI : e thaI jAya che, evuM ja che. paNa A to tamArA manamAM ema ke "A badhAne nA karavA dauM, huM karI lauM. Ama huM karI lauM." paNa huM karatAM karatAM caMdulAla thaI jAva cho tame !

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128 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) pote potAne Thapako 127 praznakartA : pote caMdulAla ja thAya che te ghaDIe. dAdAzrI : A kheMca che te ja roga che badho. kheMca choDI dene, to badhuM emanuM rAge paDI jAya. kheMca choDI detA'tA tyAre rAge paDI jatuM ne kheMca pakaDI ke bheguM thaI jAya ! e kheMca toDAvavA hAru to ame bIjAne kahIe ke tuM A karaje. jyAM sudhI kheMca che tyAM sudhI caMdulAla. kheMca chUTI ke tarata AtmA. ApaNe to dAdA pAse rahevAnuM thayuM te ja ajAyabI che ne ! tamane samajAya che badhuM AmAM ? kazuM kAmanuM che? praznakartA H badhuM kAmanuM ja che. mane evuM thAya ke A kheMca kare che, eTaluM mane samajAya che. paNa pachI pahelAMnI bilipho paDelI che ne... dAdAzrI : are, bilipho kone paDI che paNa te ? baLyuM, evuM ne evuM bolo cho, AtmA tarIke judA pADI ApuM chuM to ya ! praznakartA : mane mahIM eTaluM samajAya che ke A khoTuM thaI rahyuM che, ane eka vakhate mane evuM paNa lAge ke huM caMdulAlathI judo chuM. paNa chatAM mane evuM badhuM pAchuM bheguM thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : tame vaDhatA hoya to badhuM chUTuM paDI jAya. vaDhavADa thaI tyAMthI ja draSTi sAmAsAmI thaI jAya. eTale vAtacItamAM kheMca karatA hoya to 'caMdulAla, zuM kheMca kheMca kare che ? tArAmAM jAnavarapaNuM che ke zuM ? emAM kheMcAkheMca zuM karo cho te ? bahAra kevuM dekhAya ?" evuM barobaranA vaDhatA hoya to zuM khoTuM ? 'dAdA kahe che to tame vicAra to karo', kahIe ne ! ane dahADAmAM pAMca-paccIsa vakhata vaDhI kADhatA hoyane to chUTuM paDI jAya. A amAruM vacanabaLa che. praznakartA H tame vaDhavAnuM kahyuM ke, tyArathI vaDhavAnuM cAlu thaI gayuM che. dAdAzrI : sAruM thayuM che. eTale vaDhavAnuM thayuM eTale pote AtmA thaI gayo. praznakartA : huM to cholATI ja kADhuM. pachI Ama sarasa rahe. pachI chUTuM rahe. dAdAzrI : AtmA chUTo rahe. praznakartA : pAchuM sAruM kare to dhIme rahIne kahevuM ya paDe ke nA, tame A sAruM karyuM. dAdAzrI : te ya kahevuM paDe, nahIM to pachI bahu risAya. e ya khoTuM. pachI Ame ya karavuM paDe. kahevuM ya kharuM ke 'dAdAne rAjI rAkhyA. tame ghaNuM sAruM karyuM." praznakartA : paNa Ama badhAnA zuddhAtmA dekhAtA nA hoya. dAdAzrI : dekhAya ja zuddhAtmA. nathI dekhAtA te caMdulAlane nathI dekhAtA. ApaNane dekhAya ja zuddhAtmA. vaDhone, Thapako Apa Apa karo Akho dahADo, eka-be dahADA karI jojo ! praznakartA : hA, karIza. dAdAzrI : 'AtmA kema nathI dekhAto? badhA AtmA ja chene' kahIe. praznakartA: Ape kIdhuM ke, A badhAmAM zuddhAtmA dekhAtA nathI, te caMdulAlane nathI dekhAtA. dAdAzrI : haM. ApaNane dekhAyane ! 'dekhAya che', tene ApaNe nA pADIe chIe. A peluM nA pADIene, eTale aMdhAruM thaI jAya. praznakartA : to tyAM kevuM rAkhavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : zuddhAtmA dekhAyane pachI. nirdoSa dekhAya che tyAMthI nA samajIe ke koNa dekhAya che ?! praznakartA : nirdoSa kyAM dekhAya che ? doSa ja dekhAya che. dAdAzrI : e to caMdulAlane dekhAya paNa. praznakartA : ApaNe mAthe laI levAnI jarUra nahIM. dAdAzrI : ApaNe mAthe che ya nahIM. A to mAthe le che, enuM phaLa maLe che ene.

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pote potAne Thapako 129 praznakartA H phaLamAM zuM maLe che ? dAdAzrI : A mAra paDe jagatano ne moha vadhato jAya pachI. praznakartA : moha vadhavAno kevI rIte Ave AmAM ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe mohane dhakelI dIdho hoya, te pAcho dekhAya. je mohane jJAnI puruSanI AjJAthI dhakko vAgyo, te pharI dekhAto thaI jAya. e jANI joIne kUvAmAM paDo cho. praznakartA : caMdulAlane vaDhIe to ya mAthe laI le che. dAdAzrI : juone, have zuM thAya te ? UlaTuM ApaNe kahevuM joIe, 'vaDho, vaDhavA jevA ja che. vAMkA ja che.' nA kahevuM joIe evuM ? praznakartA : to ja juduM paDe evuM che. dAdAzrI : Diprezana Ave to caMdulAlane Ave, te ApaNane zAnuM ? ApaNe to khuza thaIe. ApaNe vaDhIe ne Diprezana Ave tyAre ApaNe khuza thavuM UlaTuM, ke have ThekANe AvyA ne ! haju to rAge pADI daIza. bahu jora karatA hoya to evuM kahIe. nA AvaDe evuM vaDhatAM ? praznakartA : AvaDe. dAdAzrI : to Aja ne Aja karI nAkha tuM. kAle mane dekhADaje. mArI hAjarImAM, covIseya kalAkanI hAjarI che, pharI AvI hAjarI nA maLe. bIjuM badhuM maLaze. tamane samaja paDI ? A dahADA bagADIza nahIM. have huM sUI gayo houM, te ghaDIe ahIM rUmamAM besIne vAtacIta karavI badhI, chone ko'ka sAMbhaLI jAya, zuM bagaDI gayuM ? tame hau kahetA zIkhyAne ? tame ya kahevA mAMDyuM ? judApaNAno abhyAsa karavo paDe ane mArI hAjarImAM. bAkI ema ne ema thAya nahIM. bahAra ema ne ema karavA jAya to thAya nahIM. mArI hAjarImAM thAya, vacanabaLathI thAya. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) vaDhIne pheravI nAkho cho ne ! paNa caMdulAla vaDhe chene, e tame kyAM vaDho cho ? thoDA dahADA che. karI lejo have. ame cetavI daIe. pachI zuM thAya ? eka phero juduM pADyA pachI caMdulAla sevA kare, enuM phaLa maLyA kare. caMdulAla 'A' pakSamAM AvI javA joIe. basa, tyAM sudhI juduM pADavAnuM. evuM ye kahevAya. 'tamAre lIdhe mane saMtoSa rahe che. tamArA lIdhe mane badho AnaMda rahe che. pahelAM je duHkha thatuM'tuM e baMdha thaI gayuM' kahIe. evo caMdulAlane anubhava thAyane ! eTale A pakSamAM AvatA jAya. caMdulAlane pahelAM je duHkha thatuM'tuM, te baMdha thaI gayuM. eTale pachI pote A pakSamAM nA Ave ke 'bhaI, amane tamAro saMgAtha sAro paDyo !' 130 praznakartA : barobara che. emane ya sukha maLe, eTale emane thAya ke A ja karavA jevuM che. dAdAzrI : hA, te ja kahuM chuM ne ! praznakartA : pachI peluM Diprezana nahotuM AvyuM. paNa lokone e badhuM batAvyuM ke juo, tame AvuM badhuM karo cho ? caMdulAlane kIdhuM meM. dAdAzrI : e to thoDuM thoDuM vaDhatA rahevuM. praznakartA : eTale haju barAbara kahevAze, pachI rAge Ave evuM ? dAdAzrI : kahetA rahevuM. pachI mArI hAjarImAM thaI jaze ! pAchuM eya Diprezana thAya. ene Thapako Apa. Thapako ApI jovo. Diprezana Ave eTale e baMdha karI daIne pAchuM navI jAtano Thapako Apavo. aMdara jotAM rahevuM ApaNe. ApaNe orgenAIjhara chIe. hAu Tu orgenAijha e ApaNuM kAma. //////////

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13 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) [17] Diprezana sAme judApaNAtI jAgRti ta Diprezata koIthI have ! lAkho mANasa Diprezana karAvavA Ave to saheja Diprezana nA thAya. lAkho nahIM, karoDo mANasa bhale hoya, paNa Diprezana thAya nahIM. Diprezana zene mATe AvavuM joIe ? atyAre ya Diprezana 'tamane' nathI AvatuM. Diprezana je Ave che te 'caMdubhAIne Ave che, temane potAne to AvatuM nathI. paNa te kharI rIte loka eksepTa kare nahIM ne ! loka eksepTa kyAre karaze ? caMdubhAIne paNa nA Ave tyAM sudhI tamAre puruSArtha karavAno. haju caMdubhAIne Diprezana Ave che ne, e Ave nahIM enuM nAma pUrNAhuti. A atyAre tamane potAne Diprezana nathI AvatuM evuM huM ya jANuM chuM ke AtmasvarUpe tamane Diprezana nathI. paNa A bAhya svarUpamAM Diprezana Ave che, AnI asara thAya che. eTale moTuM paDI jAya che ane mahIM DiprezanamAM AvI gayA hoya to caMdubhAIne kahevuM ApaNe ke "ame tamArI joDe chIe, gabharAzo nahIM." Diprezata te "huM' nahIM ! caMdubhAI DiprezanamAM AvyA to jhAlavuMya paDe ke 'tame AvA mANasa, tame sarasa AvA ! dAdA kyAMthI maLe tamane ! kevA puNyazALI !" evuM tevuM kahIe. praznakartA : hA. enI bahu jarUra paDaze. Diprezana bahu AvI jAya. dAdAzrI : nA. eTale Diprezana Ave to AvuM kahevuM paDe ene. thoDIka nirbaLatA hoyane eTale Diprezana AvI jAya pachI. ghaNAM mANasone Diprezana AvI jAya. eTale ame kahIe ke bhaI, vaDhavuM hoya to amane pUchIne vaDhajo. kyAMka pAcho DiprezanamAM AvI jAya. paNa te vakhate jo jAgRti hoya ke jene Diprezana AvyuM te huM nahIM, to vAMdho nA Ave. DiprezanamAM ja jaDe AtmA ! bhUkha lAge ane khAvAnuM nA maLyuM hoya TAIma, te ghaDIe valakhAM mAravA ene bhagavAne guno kahyo. te vakhate AtmA jaDe. kyAre jaDe ? kharuM Diprezana AvyuM hoya tyAre emAM zAMti pakaDe tyAre AtmA jaDe. eno upAya karyo ke mAryo gayo. Diprezanano upAya saMsAra karyo. DiprezanamAM ja AtmA jaDe. Diprezana tapa kahevAya. ane tapamAM AtmA jaDe. paNa te khoI nAkhe A chokarAMo bicArAM, samajaNa nahIMne. AtmA kyAre jaDe ? praznakartA duHkhamAM. dAdAzrI : khUba cogaradamanA upasarga-pariSaha e jyAre hoyane tyAre AtmA jaDe. tane samajaNa paDe che ke ? hA, to have zuM karIza ? praznakartA : have nahIM khoI nAkhuM. dAdAzrI : DiprezanamAM koI upAya nahIM. Diprezana jevI to koI davA nathI A duniyAmAM. te A aNasamaju lokoe dhULadhANI karI nAkhyuM badhuM. samajaNa vagaranA loko. bahu kaDaka thavuM. sUkAIne marI jA, paNa have ekAkAra thAya e bIjA. tame judA ne ame judA kahIe. te vakhate jhabakAro mAraze. A to bahu bhUkha lAge eTale game teno eMThavADo khaI levo ko'kano. dhIsa ijha dhI ve. have A jaMgalI nahIM tyAre bIjuM zuM kahevAya ?

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Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti 133 134 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) lokono eMThavADo khAvAno che ke vaTa rAkhavAno che? e vaTa rAkhyo, teno AtmA hAjara thAya. zuM karIza have ? praznakartA : atyAra sudhI Diprezana Ave tene dUra karavAnA upAya karatA hatA. dAdAzrI : Diprezana to hitakArI che have. moTAmAM moTuM hitakArI Diprezana che. praznakartA : e have phITa thayeluM che. dAdAzrI : phITa thayeluM che paNa mAruM kahevAnuM, DiprezanamAMthI pote nIkaLI javuM joIene ? praznakartA : e nIkaLI rahyo che. dAdAzrI : nIkaLI rahyo che, paNa temAMthI have nIkaLI ja javuM joIe. rahyo che. zuM AmAM ? cokhkhuM karI devAnuM. ke 'caMdubhAI sUkAI sUkAIne khalAsa thaI jaIza toya paNa A judA ja chIe tArAthI have." DiprezanamAM to avazya rahevAya. Diprezana nA hoya to vAta judI che. Diprezana eTale zuM ke A AtmA pragaTa thavAnI aNI AvI cUkI. tane khabara nahIM evuM ? praznakartA: eTale peluM sahana nA thAya eTale pachI bhautikamAMthI sukha zodhavAno prayatna kare pachI. dAdAzrI : e sahanatAnI hada upara AtmA pragaTa thAya ! ema ne ema te kaMI AtmA pragaTa thato haze ke ? praznakartA : paNa dAdA, A je vAta karI e ejhekTa che, paNa atyAre pote ekalo A yuddha laDhI zake evo che nahIM. dAdAzrI : nA. laDhI zake evo che, badhuM laDhI zake che. A pelAe phaphaDAvyo ne je e raDyo, evo raDyo, pachI baMdha thaI gayuM AkhuMya. avaLuM khAtuM ja baMdha thaI gayuM. Diprezana to sArAmAM sAro vakhata kahevAya. lAbha uThAvavo. Diprezana ADe dahADe Ave nahIM ane AtmA pragaTa thAya nahIM. AtmA pragaTa DiprezanamAM ja thayelo che. Diprezanano lAbha ja levo haMDreDa parasenTa. Diprezana javA nA devuM. have lAbha laIza ne ? keTalA TakA ? praznakartA : so TakA lAbha levo che. dAdAzrI : haMa.... A mUA mArI joDe rahe e samajatA nathI to mane cIDha caDhe che ke A to kevA che ?! brahmacarya pALanArA hoya e AvA hoya ? dehane kahIe, 'saLaga, eka bAju tuM saLaguM ne huM jouM. tuM bhaDako thaIne saLaguM te huM jouM' kahIe. evAM sTroMga hoya ! A to eka ATaluM nAno amatho pariSaheya sahana nahIM thato to bAvIsa pariSaha e zuM sahana kare A pyAdAM ? praznakartA : jJAnI puruSa baLa Apane ? dAdAzrI : jJAnI puruSa to badhuM baLa Ape paNa toya potAnI samajaNe ja cAle, gAMDAM kADhe. DiprezananI davA kare. ohohoho, davA karI !! Diprezana to moTAmAM moTuM AtmA pragaTa thavAnuM moMbAruM che. UlaTuM mahIM Diprezana nA AvatuM hoya to koIkane kahevuM ke mane vaDho. zAthI "mane vaDho' ema kahevAnuM ? Diprezana Ave eTalA sAru. Diprezana Ave to mane AtmA jaDe. to nididhyAsana pragaTa thAya ! nahIM to pragaTa ja nA thAya A to badhuM. DiprezanamAMthI AtmA jaDelo che, te Diprezana Ave tyAre kahe "bIjAM Avo' kahIe. upAya nahIM karavAno. Diprezanano upAya karyo eTale ene te ghaDIe AtmA pragaTa thavAno thayo, te ghaDIe bAraNAM baMdha karI dIdhAM. e hada jANatA nathI ke ApaNe kyAM AgaLa sthiratA pakaDavI. meM to jANyuM sthiratA pakaDatAM haze. tyAre kahe, "A to Diprezana Ave che tyAre ame khaI laIe eMThavADo. raste gayA to je koIe nAkhI dIdheluM hoya ne teya thoDuM khaI laIe kahe che. meM to sAMbhaLyuM ne sajjaDa thaI gayo. mAruM mAthuM caDhI gayuM. lokono eMThavADo nAkhelo teya khaI jAva ?

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Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti 135 136 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : nA khavAya. dAdAzrI : A kahe che ke, ame to khaI jaIe. keTalAya eMThavADA khAuM chuM. Diprezana Ave tyAre 'khaI jauM chuM' evuM kaheto hato ne ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : to pachI ? hajuya evuM karIza ? praznakartA : nA, evuM nathI karavuM. dAdAzrI : DiprezanamAM to vadhAre rahevuM. 'haju tuM Ava Diprezana' kahIe. 'huM chuM ne tuM chuM.' te ghaDIe AtmA judo paDaze haDahaDATa. e to paTTI ukhADatI vakhate 'oya bApa, oya bApa' e ukhaDe ? zuM karavuM paDe ? ukhADa bA kahIe. cho vALa sAthe jatI rahe paNa to ukhaDe. Ama paTTI ukhaDe nahIM ane roja lAya baLe. e to kaMI dhaMdho che ? praznakartA : dAdA, paNa e to ahaMkAra thayone ? dAdAzrI : e to DiscArja ahaMkAra che. AmAM cArja ahaMkAra to hoya ja nahIMne ! tuM tArI buddhithI nA cAlIza, amatho mAra khaI jaIza. proTekzana nA karIza. Diprezana to A bhagavAna thavAnuM eka moTAmAM moTuM mobAruM che. mahIM ghamaroLa thaI rahyuM hoya, mahIM bilakula cena nA paDe. mahIM Ama Ama thayA karatuM hoya te vakhate, "cAlo badhAM cheTA beso' kahIe. enI sAthe badhAM cheTAM besI jAya haDahaDATa. 'jAya che ke nahIM ?" ke badhAM khayAM haDahaDATa. DiprezanamAM kema Ave, baLyuM ! evuM gAjo... 're siMhanA saMtAnane ziyALa te zuM karI zake ?" A Diprezana Ave ne eTale kahIe 'bIjAM Avo'. e laI nA jAya ApaNane. AtmA to tyAMno tyAM ja che ne ! e 'bIjAM Avo' bhegAM thaIne, Ave eTale A dAdA maLyAM che ne te dAdAI beMkamAM pAra vagarano mAla che. huM tamane pemenTa karI dauM. dAdAnI beMkamAM khoTa nathI ! jJAnI puruSa maLyA, akrama vijJAnI che. khAvA-pIvAnI chUTa, badhuMya chUTa paNa AvuM A ?! e baLyuM, kaMIka e AvyuM Diprezana, te DiprezanathI gabharAvo cho ? boMba paDavAno hoya to mahIM peTamAM pANI nA hAlavuM joIe, te A DiprezanathI gabharAya ? arere ! boMba paDavAno hoya, te pelo jhiyA kahe ke "boMba paDavAno che'. tyAre kahe, 'bhaI, jyAre paDavA hoya to paDa bA. huM chuM ne huM chuM. tuM paDanAro chuM ne huM jANanAro chuM." paDanAra dAjhe, jANanAra koI dahADo dAjhe nahIM. game eTalI hoLI saLagAvene, te hoLI jonAranI AMkha kaMI dAjhe nahIM. eTale AtmAne to kazuM aDe ja nahIM. AtmA to boMbanIya ArapAra rahIne cAlyo jAya, paNa aDe nahIM kazuM ! evo AtmA tamane meM Apyo che !! rUmamAM be-cAra maccharAM joyAM hoya, to kaheze, baLyAM maccharAM che, macharAM che. atyArathI ja maccharonuM gAyA kare to AkhI rAta UMgha zI rIte Avaze ? ane A oraDImAM ja sUI javAnuM che. alyA, macchareya nathI ne maccharano bApeya nathI. ane jamIne-oDhIne sUI javAnuM. e to keDavAnA hoya to keDo, kahIe. tamAro hisAba hoya eTaluM laI jajo. bIjo hisAba bahAra koI laI javAno nathI ane nahIM to raDaze tenuMya laI javAno che ane hasatAMnuMya laI javAno. raDe ene choDI de ?! nA choDI de ? e raDatAMnuMya levAnA tyAre hasI hasIne pAne mUo. atyAre, jamADuM chuM to hasIne jamADane mUA, ATalAM badhAM jamI to javAnA che. e maccharAM jamI nahIM javAnA ? ne zI guMca A mATe ? mahIM AtmA judo pragaTa karI Apyo, judo karI ApyA pachI. e ahaMkAra ekAkAra hoya tyAre to mahIM jarA gUMcavADo thAya. paNa A meM chUTo karI Apyo, sAva chUTo karI Apyo ne pachI AvI bUmo pADIe e dAjyo, dAjhayo. tyAre mUA, e to tane te hatI ja ne Teva. e Teva choDavAnI che have ! zuddhAtmA judA paDyA pachI pariSaha-upasarga kone aDe ? caMdubhAIne aDe. pAchAM caMdubhAI gabharAya tyAre ApaNe kahevuM, 'huM chuM tamArI joDe gabharAzo nahIM'. praznakartA : hiMmate mardA to madade dAdA. Aje sarasa vAkya nIkaLyuM. dAdAzrI : hA, e to lokone Diprezana Ave. tamane zAnA mUA Diprezana Ave ? te ApaNe Diprezana hotuM haze ?

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138 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti 137 praznakartA : DiprezananuM rUTa kojha zuM, dAdA ? Diprezana AvavAnuM rUTa kojha zuM? dAdAzrI : nabaLAI potAnI, bIjuM zuM ? praznakartA : kevA prakAranI nabaLAI ? dAdAzrI : badhAM prakAranI. potAnI Ama dAnata cora eTale Diprezana ja Ave. praznakartA : ekajhekTa zabda che, dAdA. dAdAzrI : dAnata cora nathI ne nikhAlasapaNuM che, ene Diprezana zAnuM? bhogavavAnI icchA che mATe ne ? icchA nA hoya, tene zAnuM Diprezana Ave, nirIcchakane ? ApaNe AtmA thayA to icchA hoya nahIM, nirIchuka hoya ! barakata vagarano caMdu, pahelethI ja ! AtmA thaIne AtmA bolo, AtmA thaIne vartI eTale pachI vAMdho nahIM, bhAMjagaDa nahIM. praznakartA eTale zuM bolavAnuM? dAdAzrI : caMdulAla zuM kare che e badhuM ApaNane dhyAnamAM rahyA kare ne Diprezana AvyuM to jANavuM ke AtmAne thatuM nathI. AtmAne Diprezana hoya nahIM. praznakartA H have A Diprezanane jANe, evuM bane kharuM ? dAdAzrI : hA, evuM banene ! praznakartA: to Diprezana je banI gayuM e zuM che? eTale eka vakhata AtmA tarIke rahevAmAM ? dAdAzrI : Diprezana AvyuM eTale atyAra sudhI e bAju raheto hato, te tyAMthI ociMtuM chUTavA mAMDyuM have ! praznakartA : eTale enI asaramAM Diprezana AvyuM ? dAdAzrI : hA, AvyuM. paNa have pharI vadhAre vAreghaDIe judo thAya eTale Diprezana baMdha thaI jAya. praznakartA: pachI eka vakhata Diprezana pariNAma thAya nahIM. dAdAzrI : pachI eka vakhata thAya nahIM, paNa chatAM hamaNA e to pAMca-sAta-daza vakhateya AvI jAya. praznakartA : paNa e AvI jAya te vakhate jAgRti cUkyA jevuM kahevAya ? - dAdAzrI : nA, evuM kaMI cUke nahIM. e pariNAma che pahelAnuM. A ame koI phero kahIe, 'tane A nathI AvaDatuM. eTale pelI bAjuthI eNe UThIne zuddhAtmA thaI jaIne A caMdulAlane jovA. ane UlaTuM ApaNe caMdulAlane kahevA lAgavuM ke "tArAmAM kazI barakata nathI, AvaData nathI." praznakartA H have e je sAMbhaLatI ghaDIe jo A vAkya rahene, to DiprezananI asara nathI hotI. dAdAzrI : hA, ApaNe kahIe ke 'tamArAmAM barakata ja nathI. A loko kharuM kahe che, huM to anubhavuM chuM, paNa A lokoe kahyuMne, jo UghADuM paDI gayuMne ! AmAM zuM svAda kADhyo tame ?" evuM kahevuM ApaNe caMdubhAIne. paNa tame evuM kahetAM nathIne ? praznakartA : te atyAre ApanI pAse sAMbhaLyuM eTale have evuM lAgyuM ke kahevuM joIe. dAdAzrI : ane kaho to sAruM, rAge paDI jAyane ! Amane to bahu vakhatathI zIkhavADuM chuM. paNa e to kahe che mAruM je pada che e huM jANuM chuM. tamane zuM khabara paDe AmAM ?(!) Diprezana Ave to bhale Ave. meM kahyuM, "zenuM Diprezana AvyuM che ?" A badhAM mane kahe che, tenuM Diprezana

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139 14) Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti AvyuM che ! have tyAre caMdulAlamAM rahe che e nirAMte, AtmAnuM pada ApyuM che to emAM rahevAnuM choDIne ! praznakartA: te atyAre mane UMgha AvI gaI, jhokuM AvyuM to tame mane bahAra kADhI mUkyo tyAre Ama Diprezana AvI gayuM. Ama moTuM paDI gayuM. dAdAzrI : te ghaDIe Ama kahevuM ke 'caMdubhAI, joyuMne, jo tArAmAM barakata nathIne !" evuM kahevuM to pachI Diprezana nA Ave. paNa tane to tarata AvI gayuMne ? kAraNa ke tuM caMdubhAI thaI jauM chuM ane proTekzana hau kare ke 'kharekhara evuM mane UMgha nathI AvI'. te ghaDIe tuM kahyuM ke 'caMdubhAI, huM jANato'to, tuM pAsa thavA pharuM chuM, paNa tuM pAsa thato nathI. paNa eka phero pAsa thaI jA. huM chuM tArI joDe" evuM kahevuM hau. praznakartA : barobara. dAdAzrI : Diprezana Ave to khabho thAbaDavo. 'huM chuMne tArI joDe !" A paiDe ghaDapaNe A hau khabho thAbaDe chene ke "chuMne tArI joDe.' to A tamAre javAnImAM zuM vAMdho ? praznakartA : A bahu paraphekTa rIta che ne judApaNuM rahe. Diprezana Ave nahIM, badho lAbha maLe. dAdAzrI : hA. pelA milamAlika zeThiyAo mane kahe che, "kAkA, tame to pahelAM karatAM bahu pheraphAra thaI gayo. tamAro badho svabhAva pahelAM hato, te kevo sarasa hato ane atyAre kevo thaI gayo !" meM kahyuM, 'e to pahelethI ja Avo hato. tamane khabara ja nahotI. huM joDe ne joDe rahune !" tyAre kahe che, "evuM kevuM bolo cho ?" meM kahyuM, 'e pahelethI jANuM. oLakhuM tArA kAkAne !' eTale pachI mane Dipreza karI zake nahIMne ! tyAre zuM kaMI ApaNe nathI oLakhatA ? badhuMya oLakhIe. kyAM kyAM pezAba karavA gayo, nA jANIe ApaNe ? saMDAsa kyAM karavA besI gayo, dhoLe dahADe koI nA hoya to rastAmAM besI jAya. kema zaucAlaya nathI, khoLatA ? tyAre kahe, 'ahIM koI che ja nahIMne, atyAre." koI che tenI bhAMjagaDa che ene. ene konI bhAMjagaDa che ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : koI che, koI mane jue che.. dAdAzrI : tyAre mUA, A dekhAya che, A jhADa-chADa badhA dekhAya che ! tyAre kahe, 'e to mane oLakhatA nathI, e samajatA nathIne !" ane A akkalavALA badhA A je dekhAya chene skUlomAM-kolejomAM, e badhAM akkalavALA, jhADa karatAM vadhAre. amane to A akkalavALAya jhADa ja dekhAya che. praznakartA : paNa AmAM je ene lAge che ke A badhA mane joI jAya che, e zarama anubhave che, e zuM kahevAya A ? dAdAzrI : e pote 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' tethI ! praznakartA : ane pelAne AtmA tarIke varte, ene kevuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : pelAne zuM thAya ? e to kaheze, "ahIM koI nathI evuM tane lAge che, to ahIM besI jAne ! jAne heMDa, tArI joDe chuM. ahIM besI jA." ApaNe Ane chUTa ApIe. praznakartA : chatAMya prakRtimAM peluM UbhuM thAya to kharuMne aMdara ? dAdAzrI : Akho AtmA judo pADyo, pachI Ane 'phAIla' kahIne. phAIla eTalI badhI kahI ke AtmAne khoLavAno ja nA rahyo. e phAIla sivAya bIjuM badhuMya AtmA ane AtmA sivAya badhI AkhIya phAIla. lAIna opha DimArkazana keTalI badhI sarasa ! praznakartA : AmAM to jyArathI bese che, tyArathI ja ekAkArapaNe bese che. pachI "mane UThADyo' kahe che, tyAMthI ja asara thAya chene ? dAdAzrI : hA. paNa ApaNe UlaTuM kahevuM joIe ke "caMdubhAI, pAMsarA besone ! jo Aja UThADe to tamArI vAta tame jANo. nahIM to A AvI banyuM tamAruM.' ema kahevuM paDe. e ApaNe kazuMya nahIM ane cAle gADuM. peluM mAthe laI lo cho, "A phere nakkI karavuM che, Aja AghuMpAchuM nathI thavuM, Aje Ama karavuM che" to e thaI gayA caMdulAla !

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Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti praznakartA : hA, basa. 'Ama nathI karavuM, Ama karavuM che' e mAthe laI lIdhuM kahevAya ? 141 dAdAzrI : hA, vagara kAmanI pIDA ! meM AtmA cokhkho Apyo che. temAM rahetA hoya to nirAMta thaI jAya. rUmanI bahAra gayA pachI Diprezana ThaMDuM paDI gayuM'tuM ? praznakartA : pachI caMdubhAIne saheja Thapako Apyo ke tAre lIdhe A mAre bahAra nIkaLI javuM paDyuM. dAdAzrI : te ghaDIe tuM koNa ? praznakartA : te vakhate AtmA pote. dAdAzrI : prajJA ! AtmA pote hAtha nA ghAle. badhuM sekreTarI. sekreTarI opha gavarmenTa ! juduM pADatAM ja Diprezata gAyaba ! caMdubhAI ema kahe, to ApaNe Toka Toka karIe eTale ApaNo abhiprAya judo che evuM nakkI thaI gayuM. agara to caMdubhAI, AvuM kema thAya che ? eTaluM pUchIe to ya basa thaI gayuM. praznakartA : evuM to kahuM chuM, caMdubhAIne. dAdAzrI : basa, kahyuM eTale ApaNo abhiprAya judo paDyo ke ApaNe thaI gayuM juduM. chatAM pharI thAya to e bharelo mAla che ne ! praznakartA : caMdubhAIne ja Agraho che te joyA karuM. dAdAzrI : e barobara che. e joyA karavAthI ochA thaI jAya. ghaNAM ochAM thaI gayA che ane huM dhakkA mAruM chuM e to tamane yAdagIrI rAkhavA mATe. dhakkA nathI mArato huM tamane ? praznakartA : evuM nathI kazuM lAgatuM tame dhakkA mAro cho, e to game che paNa A caMdubhAInuM AvuM nIkaLe che e vede, tenuM che. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : hA, e barobara che. AvuM nIkaLe chene, tenuM che te tAre kahevAnuM ke "bhaI, AvuM na thavuM joIe'. basa, eTaluM ja. enI pAchaLa besI rahIe ane pAsTane saMbhAra saMbhAra karIe to to pachI e AjanuM khoI nAkhIe. praznakartA : prejhanTane choDIe nahIM. dAdAzrI : ame dhakko mArIe toya prejhanTane 'jo', dhakko nA joIza'' kahIe. 142 praznakartA : Ape kaheluM ke AvuM bolaje. te huM boluM chuM ke 'AI vonTa Tu rImena ina prejhanTa' paNa e to Diprezana AvI ja jAya che paNa. dAdAzrI : Diprezana to caMdubhAIne Avene, to ApaNe zuM vAMdho che ? jovuM. 'zA moTA caMdubhAI, tamane Diprezano Ave che ?!' evuM tevuM kahIe. mAre vaDhavuM nA paDe. huM to AvuM AvuM boluM. 'AkhI duniyAnA moTA bApa thaIne beThAM cho !' evuM kahuM. evuM tamAre 'zuM moTA caMdulAla !' Ama kahIene ! AvaDe ke nA AvaDe ? eTale prejhanTamAM ja rahevuM, je te raste. Diprezana Avene tyAre ApaNe kahevuM, dAdAjI juone, caMdubhAI Dipreza thaI gayA che.' tamAre kahevuM. eTale e jabarajasta puruSArtha kahevAya. 'zA moTA caMdulAla ?! tamane zarama nathI AvatI ?' kahIe. bolo pachI bannenI sagAI keTalI laMbAvI ? praznakartA : juduM ja paDI gayuM. dAdAzrI : tarAze ne ? dariyo bahu moTo che ! Diprezata Ave tyAre Diprezana Ave te ghaDIe 'A mAruM svarUpa hoya', 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM, A Diprezanane jANuM chuM', te juduM che evuM nakkI thaI jAya, to thaI gayuM kalyANa. jAgRtine ja sAcava sAcava karavAnI, ene ja poSa poSa karo, e ja zuddhAtmA che.

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Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti 143 praznakartA H ane kharekhara pote jANakAra ja hoya che ne ? Diprezana kyAre AvyuM, keTaluM AvyuM, gayA vakhata karatAM A ochuM che ke vadhAre che ? dAdAzrI : badhuM jANe. praznakartA : jema Diprezanane jANanArA AtmA tarIke rahevAnuM che evuM elIvezana vakhate jANanArA tarIke rahe to Diprezanano vakhata nA Ave ne ? dAdAzrI : kaMIka sAMbhaLe te ghaDIe TAITa thayo hoya eTale AtmA jANI jAya ke chAtI kADhI. elIveTa thayuM che mATe Diprezana AvyA vagara rahe nahIM. praznakartA : to elIvezana vakhate evI aMdara jAgRti rAkhavAnI ke tame TAITa thayA ? dAdAzrI : evI jAgRti rahe to kalyANa thaI gayuM. praznakartA : eTale jeTaluM elIvezana thAya eTaluM ja Diprezana vadhAre thAyane ? dAdAzrI : doDhaso phUTa UMcI khurazI para beTho hoya to doDhaso phUTathI paDe. benanI kaMI bhUla thAya to bhAI ene Diprezana lAve evuM bole, paNa benane potAne Diprezana Ave nahIMne ! e to 'tuM bahu kharAba mANasa' evuM kahI de. eTale pote Diprezanano mAra khAdho ane sAmAne Diprezanano mAra khavaDAvyo. eTale Dabala guno thayo. bhogavaTo ya evo ja Ave. eTale e to jabarajasta bhogavaTo Ave. potAnI bhUla hoya to ya sAmA para eTeka kare ane sAmAne dabaDAvI mAre e Dabala guno. enuM riekzana peluM Diprezana vadhI jAya. paNa te ghaDIe pAcho AnaMda bhogave, meM ene kevI capoDI dIdhI. praznakartA : pAchI pelI gaNatarI hoyane ke AvuM capoDIza eTale bIjI vakhate mArI joDe AvuM DiliMga nahIM kare. 144 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : evI badhI gaNatarI hoya. praznakartA : sAmo dabaDAve to te vakhate pote kevI rIte rahevuM ? dAdAzrI : dabaDAve to hasavAnuM. e dabaDAvato hoya to ApaNe ya kahevuM joIe ke 'heM caMdubhAI, zuM tame evA gunA karyA'tA ? te loko AvuM kahI jAya. tamane zarama nathI AvatI ?' praznakartA : evuM kahevuM joIe. barobara che. paNa enuM dabaDAvavuM e ApaNA karmanA udaya ja gaNAya ne ? dAdAzrI : bIjuM zuM ? praznakartA : eTale A mULa jAgRti rAkhavI joIe. ane vyavahAramAM kevuM rAkhavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : vyavahAramAM sephasAIDa joItI hoya to mauna rAkhavuM joIe. praznakartA : mauna joIne e vadhAre dabaDAve ne ? dAdAzrI : e bolI jAya to ene bhAra lAgaze, ApaNane zuM ? e to che ja evA ! Diprezana thAya te ghaDIe kevo vaTa mArato'to ?" evuM ApaNe kahIe, e ja AtmA ! Diprezana bhogavanAra pelo, je caDhyA'tA e utare. ene jANanAra AtmA. Diprezana thayeluM che te ya khabara paDe, te kone ? AtmAne. eTale tAre to UlaTuM te ghaDIe ema kahevuM joIe, 'jo kUdAkUda karIne caDhyA'tA, te kADhyo svAda ?!' e bolIe eTale bahu phaLa maLe, jabarajasta phaLa maLe. dareka phero AvuM bolIe ne to e ya pratikramaNe ya nA karavAM paDe ! ame ya kahIe, 'maracuM khAvuM che, ne udharasano ropha paDe che tamAro ?!' AkhuM ne AkhuM maracuM khAI jAya pelAM taLelAM ? baMdha karI dIdhAM paNa. baMdha ame karIe nahIM. ame nakkI karIe ke have A nA hoya. kAraNa ke badhI zarIra para asara paDe ne ! AtmA kyAM che te samajI lIdhuM ne ? je caDhe-utare te koNa ?

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Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti praznakartA : ghaNIvAra tame aMdara to AvuM juduM kahetA hazo, paNa ghaNIvAra moDhethI bahAra paNa AvuM judApaNAnuM bolo cho. dAdAzrI : hA, boluM chuM ne bahAra. praznakartA : eTale e bahAra bole e vadhAre iphekTiva ? 145 dAdAzrI : bahu asara paDe. eTale judA thaI gayA ne ! bahAra dekhavAvALA ya judA thaI gayA ne ! ane che juduM ja badhuM. evuM tamAre kahevuM, 'lyo, moTA DaoNkTara thaIne beThA, lyo, kADhone svAda ? zuM kADhazo ? cAlyuM nahIM kazuM !' praznakartA : pelI vANI avaLI nIkaLe ne to huM boluM ke tame DAkaNa jevA lAgo cho. dAdAzrI : DAkaNa, evuM kaho ? eTale pachI badhA saMbaMdha tUTatA jAya. saMbaMdha toDavAno che evuM bolIe eTale saMbaMdha tUTI jAya. kAraNa ke prakRtine khoTuM lAgyA vagara rahe nahIM. Atmazakti jAge, tyAM Diprezata bhAge ! praznakartA : e jAgRti eTale sudhI kevI rIte laI javAnI ? e jAgRtine tyAM sudhI laI AvavA mATe kevI rIte puruSArtha karavAno ? dAdAzrI : cUMTI khaNIneya jAgRti karIene ! cUMTI khaNIe eTale badhuM jAgRta thaI jAya. pachI game nahIM. eTale mANa karaDe to jAgRti Ave. mananA jJAtA-draSTA rahevAya tyAM sudhI jAgRti laI javAnI che. pachI e jAgRti jAgRtinuM saMbhALI le. pachI ApaNe laI javAnI nA hoya. eTale A cAla cAla kyAM sudhI karavuM ? praznakartA : vANIthI paNa AgaLa thayuMne, mana eTale ? dAdAzrI : e badhAthI alaga ja thaI jAya, tyAre jJAtA-draSTA. tyAMthI pachI A ghoDAgADImAM utarI paDavAnuM. tyAMthI pachI bIjuM maLI Ave. caDhavuM-UtaravuM nA paDe evuM Ave. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) thoDo bhAga rahetA zIkhyo eTale AvI gayuM. mana to TheTha sudhI rahevAnuM. manane anukULa game ane pratikULa nA game. caMdubhAI bahu DAhyA che kahe ke enAM manane game, eTale pharsTa klAsa moDhuM thaI jAya. praznakartA : manane gamatuM hoya che, tyAre pote zuM kare ? dAdAzrI : pote UtarI jAya nIce tyAMthI. slIpa thayA kare e to. 146 praznakartA : paNa ApaNe to uparanuM joIe che, mananA jJAtA-draSTA sudhI, to pachI manane nA game evuM hovuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : nA. manane to game, ApaNe nA kahIe. 'amAre zuM levAdevA che ?" kahIe. tane gamatuM hoya to amAre zuM levAdevA ? 'tuM tArI oraDImAM sUI jA. huM mArI oraDImAM jaIza.' manane gAMThe nahIM to kAma cAle tyAM. AvuM kahe eTale tyAM pote judo thaI gayo. praznakartA : e ja jJAtA-draSTA kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : tyAMthI jJAtA-draSTAnI zarUAta thaI. TheTha sudhI manane kaDavuM lAge evuM pI pI karavuM paDe. ame pAIe, joDe raheto hoya tene. nahIM to navaruM lAge, bIjo koI navaro paDe nahIMne ! bIjA koIne to TAIma kyAMthI hoya ? sahu loko coMTI paDe. praznakartA : have manane kaDavuM pIvAno vakhata Avyo tyAre jJAtAdraSTAno lAbha kevI rIte UThAvavo ? dAdAzrI : ekjhekTa jAgRtipUrvaka kaDavuM pIdhuM eTale jJAtA-draSTA thayo ja. praznakartA : paNa manane nA gamyuM hoya eTale vAMdho paDe ke AvuM kema ne Ama ne tema. to pelo jAgRtino lAbha jato rahene ? dAdAzrI : to e DIma thaI jAya pachI. praznakartA : hA. to jAgRtino lAbha levA mATe kevuM hovuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : manane nA game to kahIe, 'tuM tArA rUmamAM sUI jA, huM mArA ghera !'

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143 148 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jAtane jANato nathI. e ghaDIe khuzamAM rahevuM joIe ke "ohoho, Aje mArI jAta jaDI mane !" tene badale TATuM thaI jAya. A kahe chene, "mane Diprezana AvyuM "are, tane Diprezana zI rIte Ave ? to jANyuM koNe A ?" ene AtmAe jANyuM. A to badhA DiscArja che. DiscArja che eTale jovAnuM che ApaNe. Diprezana ghaTI gayuM che ke vadhI gayuM che e joyA karavAnuM. praznakartA : kharekhara Diprezana vakhate paNa pote jANato ja hoya che. Diprezana sAme judApaNAnI jAgRti praznakartA : hA, evuM kahevuM paDene ? dAdAzrI : manane nA game eTale potAnuM bhAna juduM hovuM ja joIe ke huM judo chuM, tuM koNa chuM ? ne mAre zuM levAdevA ? praznakartA: evuM kahIe rahevuM ja joIe. to ja pelo lAbha maLe ekjhakTa ? dAdAzrI : to pote jIvavAno Aro Ave. nahIM to jIve zI rIte ? Diprezana Ave. Diprezana AvIne pachI khalAsa thaI jAya. pote judo che evuM bhAna hovuM joIe. praznakartA: mana DiprezanamAM hoya ane pote judo rahe, evuM bane ? dAdAzrI : hA. mananA Diprezanane jANIe e ApaNuM svarUpa che. praznakartA : mananuM Diprezana paNa na AvavuM joIene ? dAdAzrI : e to AgaLanA sTejamAM. paheluM Diprezana AvavuM ja joIe. tene jANavuM joIe. praznakartA : e Diprezanane jANe nahIM ne e DiprezanamAM ekAkAra rahe to ? - dAdAzrI : A badhAM bahAranA mANasa jevuM thaI gayuM pachI to ! Diprezana Ave te ghaDIe ThaMDuM nA paDI javuM joIe. "oho, mArI jAta khabara paDI have.' evo lAbha uThAvavo joIe. 'mArI jAta khabara paDatI. nahatI, huM koNa chuM" e khabara nahotI paDatI. te jANyuM have. Diprezana to AtmA sivAya koIne khabara paDe nahIM, e ja mAro AtmA ne e ja mAruM svarUpa ! praznakartA : A Diprezana che evuM juduM jovuM, e ja AtmA. dAdAzrI : juduM jonAro AtmA ne Diprezana Ave eTale pAchuM TADhuTapa thaI jAya. 'AiskrIma khAI lo ne' kaheze. paNa e potAnI dAdAzrI : e ja AtmA. enA badale A to TADhoTapa thaI jAya. evuM chene, Diprezana Ave tyAre ApaNe elivezana karavAnI jarUra che. bIjuM zuM karavAnuM ? roja roja elivezana karavAnI jarUra nathI. Diprezana Ave to ja karavAnI jarUra ke "huM anaMta zaktivALo chuM, huM anaMta sukhanuM dhAma chuM" ema eliveTa karavo joIe ! Diprezana nA thAya e jagyA ApaNI. jo AnaMda jato nA hoya e jagyA ApaNI. jyAM jagatanuM kalyANa thAya, e jagyA ApaNI ! evuM kahIza ne ? to sapATAbaMdha pagathiyAM caDhI javAya. khoTa bahu che ne !

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[2.1] jJAtA-draSTA jJAtA-draSTA tyAM paramAnaMda ! AtmAno mukhya svabhAva zo ? jJAtA-draSTA, paramAnaMda ! bIjA to pAra vagaranAM guNo che, paNa jJAtA-draSTA e mukhya che. praznakartA : jJAtA-draSTAbhAva sAthe paramAnaMda paNa rahe ? dAdAzrI : paramAnaMda ja hoya, niraMtara paramAnaMda. amane chavvIsa varSathI Tenzana UbhuM thayuM nathI, eka sekanDe ya. gALo bhAMDe, dhola mAre, jelamAM laI jAya, to ya amane Tenzana UbhuM nA thAya. ane e zakti tamArAmAM ya che. phakta zakti keLavavAnI jarUra che. je sAmAna mArAmAM che e sAmAna tamArAmAM che. jJAtA-draSTApada sivAyanI bhrAMti che. hA, jJAtA-draSTA nA hoya tyAra pachI bhrAMti UbhI thAya. jJAtA-draSTA eTale badhI zeya vastu dekhAya. eTale jJAtA-draSTAmAM rahevuM. pote niraMtara jJAtAdraSTApadamAM rahetA hoya te jJAnI. pUrvakarma taDe jJAtA-draSTA rahevAmAM ! praznakartA : Ape peluM jJAtA-draSTAmAM rahevAnuM kahyuM che, to jJAtAdraSTA rahevAmAM kaI vastu ADe Ave amane ? dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTA rahevAmAM pUrvakarmanA udaya ADe Ave che. have AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) pAchalAM karmo badhAM gUMcavaze. manamAM vicAro Avaze, eTale emAM gUMcAvAnuM nahIM ApaNe. mahIM bheLaseLa nahIM thaI javAnuM. e jJeya che ne ApaNe jJAtA chIe. zeya-jJAtAno saMbaMdha rahyo A jagata joDe. bIjo koI saMbaMdha che ja nahIM have. have bIjA saMbaMdhamAM UtarIe ja nahIM. 150 praznakartA : dvandvo, e spaMdano nirmULa nathI thayAne ? dAdAzrI : nA, e zeya svarUpe rahelAM ja che ne ! e badhuM jJeya svarUpe che. ane ApaNane manamAM gUMcAya ke bhaI, A mane vaLage che ke zuM ? dahADe dahADe ApaNe to rAga-dveSa ochAM thAya che ke nahIM, eTaluM jovuM. praznakartA : Atmatattva jANyA pachI je prazno thAya che ke gUMcavAya che te ApaNo vibhAga nahIMne ? dAdAzrI : e badhA jJeya che ane DiscArja svarUpe che. ane ApaNA tAbAmAM nathI, vyavasthitanA tAbe che. ApaNo ane eno svabhAva judo che. e zeya svabhAvanAM che, ApaNe jJAtA svabhAvanA chIe. zeya vastuo vItarAga che, jJAtA ya vItarAga che ne vacce ahaMkAra che te rAga-dveSa karAve che. ahaMkAra UDI gayo eTale zeya joDe vItarAgI bhAva rAkhavAno. jJeyane tarachoDa mArIe to e paNa tarachoDa mAre. chatAM mahIM paudgalika bhAvo kharAba nIkaLe to pratikramaNa karavAnuM tamAre. A jJAna ApyA pachI je bAkI rahe che, e badhuM jJeya svarUpe rahe che. je vastu mahIM utpanna thaI te jJeya che ane ApaNe jJAtA chIe. jJAtA-draSTAne 'phoreta'tuM nahIM jokhama ! A ame jJAna ApyA pachI, homa-phorena(sva-para) be judA paDyA tyAra pachI ame kahIe chIe ke jo tame tamAruM jJAtA-draSTApaNuM na cUko to tame 'phorena'nA jokhamadAra bilakule ya nathI. praznakartA : jJAtA-draSTAnuM lakSa barAbara besatuM nathI. e Ave che ane jatuM rahe che. dAdAzrI : jatuM rahe e to. e kaMIka kAyama raheze ne tyAre bhagavAna

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zAtA-draSTA 151 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) thaI gayA hazo. mATe A jatuM rahe che, eTale paNa e pUruM thaze kharuM. kAraNa ke haju saMsAramAM badhAM kAryo bAkI che ne ! saMsAranI phAIlo badhI bAkI che ke nathI bAkI ? praznakartA : bAkI che haju. dAdAzrI : e phAIlo jema ochI thatI jaze tema e lakSa vadhAre vadhAre besatuM jaze. phAIlane lIdhe aTakyuM che badhuM. praznakartA : potAnAmAM aviratapaNe rahevAya evI kRpA karo. pudgalanA dareka saMyogane parapariNAma jANavAmAM kSati Ave che. dAdAzrI : ApaNe je pahelAnI phAIlo che ne, e phAIlono nikAla karI nAkhavAno. koI kSati Ave tyAM AgaLa samajI jaIe ke A phAIlone lIdhe ja che. eTale jJAtA-draSTApadamAM aviratapaNe rahevAtuM nathI. tenuM kAraNa e ja che, eka jAtanI pAchalA hisAbanI Dakhala che phAIlonI badhI. eTale aviratapaNuM nathI rahetuM. akrama eTale A kAraNa mokSa ja thaI gayo kahevAya. paNa A jeTalA karmo bAkI rahyA che, eno jJAtA-draSTApUrvaka niveDo lAvavAno che ! jJAtA-draSTApUrvaka e badhuM 'jotAM' niveDo Ave to AtyaMtika mokSa thaI jAya. basa, bIjuM kazuM che nahIM. pachI game tevA karmo hoya, game tevAM cIkaNA hoya, kharAba hoya, paNa jJAtA-draSTA rahyo eTale chUTyo. udayakarmamAM DakhoDakhala ! udayakarmamAM Dakhala karIe te ghaDIe buddhi hoya ane udayakarmamAM Dakhala nA karIe te ghaDIe jJAna hoya. A jJAna ne buddhino che te bheda. praznakartA : Dakho mAtra buddhithI ja thAya chene ? dAdAzrI : Dakho mAtra buddhino ja che A badho. A buddhie ja badhI bhAMjagaDo, locA vALyA. jJAnane AvuM kazuM hoya ja nahIM. jJAnamAM to Dakho hoya ja nahIMne ! hA, caMdubhAI che te Dakho kare ane jJAna jANe eTale tame chUTA. praznakartA: pelA prasaMga UbhA thAya tyAre ajJAnatA UbhI thAya ne enI asaro UbhI thAya ane A jJAnanI sthitimAM rahevuM hoya to kaI rIte AvI zake ? dAdAzrI : e to caMdubhAI emAM rahe, tame AmAM raho. tame mahIM judA raho to bIjuM kazuM aDatuM nathI. peluM kaMI sudhare nahIM. have je jAmI gayeluM che e sudhare ochuM kaMI ?! ene joyA karavuM eTale chUTyuM. praznakartA: e to caMdubhAInuM je che e DiscArja thayA karavAnuM. dAdAzrI : e pudgala eno dharma judo, A AtmAno dharma judo. bene levAdevA nahIM. ko'kanA dharmamAM Dakhala kevI rIte karAya ? ene 'jovAnuM' phakta ke pudgala A bhAvamAM phare che. jene 'jotAM' AvaDyuM, tene badhuM ya gayuM. ane udayakarmamAM hAtha nA ghAle eTale kAma thaI gayuM. ane hAtha ghAlyo hoya to pastAvo karIne paNa tarata ene choDI de to e jJAnanI najIkamAM che, toya kAma thaI javAnuM enuM ! koNe lIdhuM, koNe dIdhuM, ANe ApyuM Ama ne AmaNe lIdhuM, evA koI copaDA bhagavAna rAkhe nahIM. kevA DAhyA che ! copaDA ja rAkhatA nathI. hisAba badho cokhkho. vagara copaDe hisAba cokhkho. tethI meM kahyuM ke bhagavAna copaDA lakhe nahIM ne buddhi che te copaDA lakhe. udayakarmamAM hAtha ghAle, AMgaLI ghAle udayakarmamAM. alyA, Ape che te ya udayakarma ne pelo le che e enA udayakarma. emAM tAre vacce hAtha ghAlavAno rahyo ja kyAM te ? udayakarma Ape chene ? ane lenAre ya udayakarma le che. tyAM AgaLa pachI jarma-udhAra karavAnuM ja kyAM rahyuM ? paNa A buddhino Dakho. A che te udayakarmamAM jo Dakho nA kare, enuM nAma jJAna. pUruM jJAna, haM ! ahIM A tamAruM amuka jJAna to che paNa kevaLajJAna enuM nAma kahevAya ke udayakarmamAM Dakho nA kare ! tamane samyaka jJAna to che ja. paNa have kevaLajJAna thatAM pahelAM AvI tevI badhI vastuo joIzene ? jJAna to che ja. paNa kevaLajJAnamAM A badhuM AMtarazene ? pachI udayakarmamAM Dakho nahIM karavAno. ko'ka dhola mAratuM hoya to

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jJAtA-draSTA 153 154 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ApaNe ema nahIM kahevAnuM ke kema mAruM chuM tuM ? ane kema mAruM chuM, te bolavAno caMdubhAIne adhikAra che paNa tamAre adhikAra nahIM. A caMdubhAI e ya udayakarmane AdhIna bole. tamAre jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM. samajavuM to paDene ? vItarAga mArgamAM gappA nA cAle ! bIjA mArgamAM cAlI jAya gappA. A to bahu kAMteluM, bahu jhINuM kAMtIne regyulara sTejamAM ja mUkeluM ane kevaLajJAnathI 'joIne' kahe pAchAM. ema ne ema bole nahIM akSareya. samajAya evI vAta chene ? praznakartA : paNa A udayakarma che, evuM paNa pUrNa jAgRti hoya tyAre ja samajAya. dAdAzrI : hA, nahIM to udayakarmaya nA samaje. keTalI badhI jAgRti rahe tyAre samajAya ke udayakarma che A. thoDI thoDI jAgRti to rahe che, mahAtmAone. A jJAna to kharuMne ! jJAna thaI gayuM, have phakta kevaLajJAna thavAne mATe bAkI rahyuM. praznakartA : kevaLajJAna thavAne zuM bAkI rahyuM ? dAdAzrI : A kyAM kyAM haju buddhinA DakhA che e 'joI' levAnA. eTale buddhinA DekhA caMdubhAI kare, teno vAMdho nathI. ApaNe phakta te DakhAmAM na bhaLI jaIe. ApaNe 'joIe', eTale ApaNe ApaNA hisAbamAM. ane temAM jo hisAba cUkIe to udayakarmamAM Dakho karyo kahevAya. caMdubhAInuM udayakarma che paNa ApaNe bhaLI jaIe evuM nA hovuM joIe, to ApaNane aDe nahIM. jJAtA-draSTA sivAyanuM badho DakhoDakhala ! praznakartA: to pachI eno artha evo thayo ke jJAtA-draSTApaNuM na rahyuM tyAM DakhoDakhala ? dAdAzrI : hA. jJAtA-draSTA sivAya badhuM ya DakhoDakhala, enuM nAma ja saMsAra ! paNa have jJAtA-draSTA to nA rahevAya te vAstavikatA che, ke bhaI, mANasanI eTalI zakti nathI. bAkI jJAtA-draSTA rahyo e bhagavAna ja thaI gayo. paNa tyAM sudhI have kema karavuM ? to mahIM Dakho karavAno vicAra Ave te ghaDIe pratikramaNa karI levuM. eTale pachI e Dakhala thaI nahIM. Dakhala thaI hatI paNa vALI dIdhI ApaNe. praznakartA : A to bahu UMcI vAta karI nAkhI. paNa kaMI dareka vakhate mANasa 'joyA' kare, evuM rahI zake nahIM ne ? dAdAzrI : nA rahI zake, to pachI eNe pratikramaNa karavAM. tamane vicAra Ave ne, tenuM pratikramaNa karavuM. ekjhakTa jJAtA-draSTA nA rahevAya to pratikramaNa karavuM. 'ATalI badhI utAvaLathI zuM karavA gADI calAvo cho ?" bolAI javAyuM to ApaNe pratikramaNa karavuM pachI ke, A bhUla thaI ApaNI. praznakartA H nahIM, DakhoDakhala karavAno vicAra nathI Avato mANasane, paNa thaI ja jAya che. dAdAzrI : hA, thaI ja jAya. nA thAya evuM nahIM, paNa thaI ja jAya. eTale DakhoDakhala kare che, e ja bhAMjagaDa che ane tene lIdhe A saMsAra Ubho rahyo che. praznakartA : jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM, pachI A pratikramaNa karavAnI je vAta che eno kaMI artha ja nahIM ? dAdAzrI : pratikramaNa to koNe karavAnuM che ? ApaNe jAte karavAnuM nathI hotuM. ApaNe A akrama vijJAna che eTale kaSAyo jarAka jADA rahelA hoya. have ko'kane TaiDakAvyo, te pelAne duHkha thAya evo TaiDakAvyo. eTale 'tamAre' 'caMdubhAIne kahevuM ke, 'bhAI, tame atikramaNa kema karyuM ? mATe pratikramaNa karo.' 'ApaNe' zuddhAtmAe pratikramaNa nahIM karavAnuM ! praznakartA: ApaNe to jJAtA-draSTA ja rahevAnuM ne ene pratikramaNa karavAnuM. eTale jJAtA-draSTA e to AtmAno svabhAva che ane pratikramaNa e pudgalane karavAnuM che. dAdAzrI : atikramaNa pudgalanuM ne pratikramaNeya pudgalanuM che.

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jJAtA draSTA 155 praznakartA : hA. e jo samajAya to pachI bahu gUMca nathI rahetI. jovA-jANavAtuM tatkSaNe ja ! praznakartA : A caMdubhAInI badhI kriyAone 'jovAnI' ja chene ? dAdAzrI : tame pote A badhI kriyAnA jJAtA thayA. 'tamAre' 'svarUpa'mAM rahevuM joIe, jJAtA-draSTApaNuM ja rahevuM joIe, pachI zuM vAMdho che ? praznakartA : eTale atyAre huM ApanI sAthe vAta karato houM, e vakhate mAre to ene 'jovuM' joIe ke A caMdubhAI zuM bolI rahyA che ! dAdAzrI : hA, e nA rahe to pachI e phAIla pAchI pharI 'jovI' paDaze. praznakartA : hA. kAraNa ke sAImalaTenIyasalI (sAthe sAthe), pAchaLathI nahIM paNa eTa e TAIma rahevuM joIe. dAdAzrI : nA rahe te jAgRti ochI eTalI. praznakartA : jyAre banAva banato hoya tyAre, huM eno jJAtA-draSTA hovo joIe. ApaNane pachI khyAla Ave paNa e kAmanuM nahIM ne ? dAdAzrI : chatAM pachI khyAla Ave, to ya bahu thaI gayuM. phAIla joyA vagara gaI to ? praznakartA : have jamatI vakhate jAgRti nA rahI. eTale pAchaLathI jyAre jAgRti Ave, tyAre khaMkherI nAkhe ke A khAnAra judo ne huM judo to... dAdAzrI : juduM ja chene e to ! praznakartA : paNa e juduM nathI rAkhyuM ethI to baMdhAyelA. dAdAzrI : to pharI niveDo karIzuM. pharI vAra A phAIlane 'jovI' paDe. eka phero phAIlamAM sahI thayA vagaranI jatI rahI to pachI pharI sahI karavI paDe. sahI karyA vagara to javA devAya ja nahIM. 156 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : eTale sahI eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : 'joyuM' e sahI thaI gaI. 'joyA' vagara jo jatuM rahyuM, sahI rahI gaI tyAM. ApaNe sahI karIne ja javuM paDaze. temAM kaMI sAhebane gALo devAtI haze evuM ? eka sahI joIe, signecara. praznakartA : e signecara eTale jarA barobara kaho. e signecara eTale kevI rIte varte ? dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTAbhAve 'joIne' jAya phAIla. praznakartA : paNa A khAvAnuM zarU kare tyAre bole ke AhArI AhAra kare che ane huM nirAhArI mAtra tene jANuM chuM. pachI nirAMte barobara khAya, to emAM sahI to kSaNe kSaNe hovI joIene, judApaNAnI ? dAdAzrI : nA, evuM kaMI nahIM. jyAM AgaLa bhUla khaIe tyAM joIe. praznakartA : Akho dasa miniTa jamavAno TAIma pasAra thaI gayo ane e dasa miniTa pachI ya jAgRti nahotI AvI. Aje doDha mahinA pachI khabara paDI ke A to te dahADe jAgRti nahotI rahI, to tyAM e sahI karavAnI to rahIne... dAdAzrI : e pharI jamatI vakhate pharI sahI thaze. praznakartA : te e je cUkI gayA, enuM zuM Avaze ? dAdAzrI : e pharI sahI karavI paDazene ! praznakartA : pahelAM je je cUkyo e badhuM atyAre 'joyuM' e sahI karI kahevAya ? eNe kyAM cUkI gayo enuM jAgRtipUrvaka badhuM pRththakaraNa karyuM, enuM zuM phaLa Ave ? dAdAzrI : e emAM che te phaLa zAnuM AvavAnuM ? e to karekTa karyuM eTale enI e ja phAIla pharI nahIM Ave. praznakartA : e sahI karavAnI rahI jAya e bhUla kahevAya ?

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jJAtA-draSTA 157 dAdAzrI : tyAre nA kahevAya ? praznakartA H ane e bhUlanuM pariNAma zuM Ave ? dAdAzrI : tAre jeTalI phAIlo hoya, emAM sahIo karavAnI che. te Ama phAIlo be-cAra bhegI gaI hoya, to traNa rahI gaIne ? eno kakaLATa zo ? nevuM hatI, temAM sAITha to thaI gaI. bAkI rahI e pharI Ave. praznakartA : kalAka pachI khabara paDI ke A to jovA-jANavAnuM rahI gayuM, to e pAchuM joI le-jANI le, to chUTI jAya ne ? dAdAzrI : chUTI jAya. praznakartA : eTale Avato bhava Ave evo koI niyama kharo ? dAdAzrI : e to keTalAMka Avate bhava jatA rahe. praznakartA : koI paNa saMyoga jJAtA-draSTA rahyA vagara cAlyo jAya, to ApaNe pharIthI ene game tyAre bhogavavo paDaze ? dAdAzrI : te pAchuM pharI 'jovuM' paDe. praznakartA H pharIthI eka kalAka pachI yAda Ave ane enuM pratikramaNa kare to ? dAdAzrI : yAda Ave to ya phAyado thAya ja ne ! e pachI moLuM thaI jAya. enI e vastu hoya to pratikramaNa kare to dhovAI jAya. praznakartA : e nikAla pachI A janmamAM ja thaI jAya ke pAchuM bIjA janmamAM nikAla bAkI rahe ? dAdAzrI : jeTalo phAIlono samabhAve nikAla kare, emAM ghaNIkharI A janmamAM ja nikAla thaI jAya. koI phAIla bAkI rahe, e to bIjA janmamAM ya Ave. paNa puruSArtha dharma che ne ! eTale badhI bAbatamAM banne chUTa che. 158 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) tyAM bAkI rahI jAya nikAla ! nA joyuM ne nA jANyuM, eTale e DiscArja bhAva pharI pAcho nikAla karavA Avaze, paNa che DiscArja bhAva. praznakartA : eTale jJAna lIdhA pachI upayoga nA rahe, to pAchuM pharI e DiscArja Ave ? dAdAzrI : hA, sahI nA thAya eTale sahI karavA mATe pharI kAgaLa Ave, eTalI khoTa. praznakartA : to e khoTa pAchI bIjI vAra pUrI thaI jAya ke pAchI ? dAdAzrI : pUrI thAya ja ne ! bIjuM zuM thAya, dhaMdho zo che ! atyAre to utAvaLane laIne kAgaLa bahu ane TAIma thoDo, te thoDA ghaNA rahI jAya kAgaLa. eTale te pharI vAra ke TAIma vadhAre hoya ne kAgaLonuM kAma ochuM thaI gayuM hoya. tyAre pUro nikAla thaI jAya. e jo nikAlI samaje to ene vAMdho nathI. ane nahIM to ene pharI pharI nikAla karavo paDaze. emAM cAle nahIM ne ! jyAM sudhI phAIla upara 'cokhkhuM che' evI sahI nahIM thAya tyAM sudhI pharI pharI phAIla AvyA ja karaze. e pudgala cokhkhuM thayuM, e pachI nahIM Ave ! jAgRti caDhe, dhyAna DAyavarTa karatAM ! praznakartA H phAIla eTale koI vyaktigata hoya tevuM ? dAdAzrI : game te hoya. praznakartA H te vicAro paNa phAIlarUpe ja gaNAya che ne ! phAIlarUpe vicAro hoya tenuM pratikramaNa karavuM sAruM ke ene 'jovI' paDe ? dAdAzrI : e vicAro jyAre Ave te 'jue' ja. 'jue' eTale cokhkhA thaIne gayA. nathI gamatA e khabara paDe che ne ? gamatAM hoya toya 'jovAnA'. gamatAvALA nahIM karavAnuM, enuM nAma jovAnuM'.

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jJAtA-draSTA 159 160 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) vicAra e to manamAMthI udbhava thAya, te pachI nA game te pAchuM cheTA rahIe ane game to bhegA thaIe. nA gamatAmAM tanmayAkAra nA thAya, nA gamatAmAM cheTo rahe eTale nA gamatAmAM jJAtA-drA thayA. have gamatAmAM jJAtA-draSTAnuM jJAna ApeluM hoya ja eTale pharI phAIla 'joI' pachI cokhkhuM thaI jAya. jovAnA prayogathI ja thAya, bIjo koI upAya nahIM. jotA nA phAve to bIjo prayoga goThavI devo. caraNavidhi bolavI, pachI vAMcavI. je mAla bharyo hoya, tenA udaya vakhate ApaNe dhyAna ApIe nahIM te mAla yujhalesa-nakAmo ja jAya. pachI dhyAna nA ApIe bahu, to enI meLe jato rahe nakAmo, chone pachI kacaro bharyo hoya. dhyAna ApIe. tanmayAkAra thaIe tyAre vikalpa kahevAya. eTale e 'joyA' karIe agara to bIjuM kAma karIe mahIM to pelo nakAmo thaI jAya. praznakartA : eTale beu rastA che ne ? kAM to emAM dhyAna nA ApIe ane vidhimAM ke emAM kazAmAM pesI jaIe athavA to enI sAme jJAtA rahIe. dAdAzrI : jJAtA rahevuM ane nA rahevAya to pelI rIte. praznakartA : eTale beu rIte pelI gAMTho ogaLe. dAdAzrI : hA, ane jyAre marI javAno vicAra Ave che te tyAM AgaLa tanmayAkAra thatAM nathI. thAya kazuM nahIM paNa e samaje che ke ahIM AgaLa nukasAnakAraka che, mATe tyAM cheTo rahe che. A to Ane TesTa paDe che, tyAM tanmayAkAra thaI jAya che. praznakartA : e TesTavALuM jokhamI samajAya to pachI tyAM cete ne? praznakartA : AmAM pelo vicAra je Ave che, emAM be vastu kIdhI. eka to enA jJAtA-draSTA rahevAnuM ane bIjuM enAM pratye dhyAna na ApavuM. to e beu prakriyAmAM kahyuM ke vicAra kharI paDe to pachI beumAM phera kayA ? dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTA rahe temAM vadhAre phAyado thAya. pelo ocho phAyado thAya. praznakartA : phAyado eTale ? vadhAre phAyado eTale ? dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTA e riyala puruSArtha kahevAya. enI tole kaMI ja na AvI zake ! praznakartA : paNa to A bemAM phera zuM che Ama ? eTale bIje dhyAna Ape e zuM kahevAya ane jJAtA-draSTA rahe e zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTA jo nA rahevAtuM hoya to bIje dhyAna rAkha. navakAra maMtra vAMce, bIjuM kaMI vidhi bole. basoto TrAphika cUkAve 'jovAtuM ! praznakartA : je paNa kaMI mAruM DiscArja Ave che, ene huM khAlI 'joyA' karuM chuM, bIjuM kazuM karato nathI. A barAbara che ? dAdAzrI : haM. barAbara che. praznakartA : jJAna ekadhAruM kema rahetuM nathI ? utarI jAya che pAchuM, pAchuM caDhe evuM kema ? dAdAzrI : nA utare. ekavAra caDhyA pachI utare nahIM. jJAna to jJAna ja rahevAnuM. ekavAra jo AMdhaLo thaI gayo to pachI dekhAtuM baMdha thaI jAya. A to paNa pharI dekhAya che ne ? dAdAzrI : hA. praznakartA : manamAM vicAra Ave ane emAM dhyAna nA ApIe to e khAlI thayuM kahevAya ke pachI iphekTa ApIne jAya bIjuM kaMI ? dAdAzrI : haM. khAlI thaI jAya. 'kevaLa nijasvabhAvanuM. akhaMDa varte jJAna, kahIe kevaLajJAna te, deha chatAM nirvANa.' - zrImad rAjacaMdra

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zAtA-draSTA 162 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) bhalene deha hoya paNa chatAM nirvANa che, kahe che. praznakartA : dAdA, akhaMDa thavuM bahu agharuM che. dAdAzrI : are, khaMDa thayuM tene akhaMDa thatAM vAra nA lAge. khaMDa jene thayuM, teNe akhaMDa thavAnI bhAMjagaDa nahIM karavAnI. e akhaMDa thavA mATe ja khaMDa thayuM che. praznakartA : dAdA, AmAM evuM thAya che ke pravRtti karatAM hoya to zarU karatAM pahelAM e dhyAna rahe. pachI pravRttimAM paDyA eTale bhUlI jAya aDadho kalAka. pravRtti pUrI thAya eTale pachI pratIti thAya. dAdAzrI : evuM che ne, A zenA jevuM che ? tamane samajAvuM ke ApaNe ahIM AgaLa eka jagyAe A koThInAM DhALa upara, cAra rastA upara eka moTI khurazI nAkhIne badhAM beThAM tyAM AgaLa. te ApaNe sAmI bAju jovuM hoya to basa Ave to peluM dekhAya ? eTale baso Aya-jAya kare tyAM sudhI peluM akhaMDa nA dekhAya. are, baso AvatI-jatI baMdha thaI jaze. rAta paDI eTale enI meLe ja baso baMdha thaI javAnI, haDahaDATa. praznakartA : dAdA, bALapothIno dAkhalo ekadama kemano badhAne ApI dIdho ? - dAdAzrI : hA, paNa zuM thAya ? kAma lAgI jAyane ! ene bhaya lAge che ke have A akhaMDa kyAre thAya ! nathI bhaya rAkhavA jevuM. te A badhI baso baMdha thaI jaze eTale AkhuM ja rahe, akhaMDa ja. tAruM jJAna to akhaMDa ja che. A baso vAMdho UThAve che ane basono saMyoga che. te saMyoga pAchAM viyogI svabhAvanA che. e jhapATAbaMdha jatAM raheze. have tuM navA saMyogo UbhAM karato nathI. praznakartA : dAdA, dasa dahADA besavuM paDe A badhuM samajavA mATe, to Ape eka lITImAM samajAvyuM ke vacce baso ja doDe. AnAM uparathI to amAre anubhava levA jevo ke have zuM karavA khoTuM mAthuM phoDyA karIe ? dAdAzrI : baLyuM, A tamAro mokSa ja che. A to baso Aya-jAya karatI hoya, temAM basovALAne kazuM nA kahevAya ApaNAthI ? ApaNe mokSane laIne bolAya nahIM. te be mALavALI ye Ave, eka mALavALI ye Ave. ane hAthI jato hoya to nA dekhAya pAchuM. paNa have e saMyogo che. eTale jeTalAM che eTalAM AvIne jatAM rahe che ane pachI e akhaMDa ja raheze. che ja akhaMDa. eTale akhaMDa nathI rahetuM, paNa keTalAMkane dAdA to akhaMDa rahe che ne ? eTale Ama samajaNa paDI jAyane, akhaMDa ! juone, keTalo gUMcAro hato ke A khaMDita thayuM, have akhaMDa kyAre thaze ? te konI bAdhA rAkhavI have ? akhaMDa ja che A. tamane samajAI gayuM akhaMDa have ? agharuM lAgatuM'tuM ane bahu agharuM, ohoho ! Ano kyAre pAra Avaze ne kyAre e thaze ! AvI gayelo pAra ! enA abhyAsanI jarUra che ahIM. A akrama vijJAna che te eTale TacamAM AvavAnI jarUra. eka phero maLe che. tenI jAgRti jatI nathI A. eka phero mane bhego thayo ne jJAna lIdhuM hoya to enI jAgRti jatI nathI. have jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM te ja cAritra. paNa e tamArAthI rahevAya nahIM. kAraNa ke tamAre to hajAro lapharAM. vacce baso Aya-jAya karyA karatI hoya, emAM zI rIte jJAtA-draSTA raho ?! tame kaho ke A basone lIdhe nathI dekhAtuM kazuM, che kharuM paNa dekhAtuM nathI basone lIdhe. tyAre huM kahuM ke 'baso tamArI goThavaNI che ke bIjA koInI ?" tyAre kahe, "hA, e to mArI ja goThavelI." meM kahyuM, 'be mALanI hau goThavelI ?" tyAre kahe, 'hA. be mALanI hau goThavelI." tame ja A goThavelI bAjI. mArI baso badhI baMdha thaI gaI hoya ne tamArI to cAlu ja che ne ! praznakartA : pelI basano TrAphika Ave eTale dekhAtuM baMdha thaI jAya, to have jovAnuM zuM ? dAdAzrI : zeya dekhAya. A AtmA arIsA jevo che. arIsAnI jagyAe AtmA mUko, to arIsAmAM che te ja peluM sAme hatI je vastu. sAmo Ama zaNagAra karelo thAMbhalo hato. te arIsAmAM dekhAto kema baMdha

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jJAtA-draSTA 163 thaI gayo ? thAMbhalo mahIM jhaLakyA kare. te jhaLakato baMdha thaI gayo eTale pelo bUma pADe ke mArA AtmAmAM Ama mahIM dekhAtuM nathI have. tyAre kahe, bhaI, vacce A baso jAya che eTale. AtmA jJAtA-draSTA che. eTale Ama A AMkhonI peTha nathI joto, Ama mahIM jhaLake. jJAtA-draSTAmAM te kaMI kriyA karavI paDe ? jhaLake eTale to A arIsAne kazuM mahenata karavI paDe ? ahIMthI Ama gayo te mahIM dekhAya. ta khoLo TrAphika kliyaransane ! praznakartA : te baso jatI baMdha kevI rIte karavAnI ? dAdAzrI : baMdha nahIM karavAnI. e to jeTalI che, DIsAIDaDa thaI che eTalI javA ja devAnI. kazuM baMdha karavAnI nahIM. baso jatI vakhate ApaNA lakSamAM rahe ke pelI bAju che ja. A to pahelAno hisAba che. je A baso jAya che te kAyadAnA dare jAya che. praznakartA : huM to e zodhuM chuM ke baso kevI rIte baMdha karavI mAre ? dAdAzrI : nA, e baMdha nahIM karavAnI. baMdha karavA jaIe to koNa baMdha kare e ? ApaNe to zuddhAtmA thayA. praznakartA : paNa e gamatuM nathI pAchuM aMdara ke A baso jaI rahI che. ema thAya che ke A baso cAlI have, baMdha karo. dAdAzrI : hA. e nA game e caMdubhAIne nathI gamatuM. tamane to game ja che ne ! eTale caMdubhAIne kahevuM ke A badho hisAba che. mATe gabharAzo nahIM. baso badhI kevI kevI Ave che, nahIM ? praznakartA : bhAre. dAdAzrI : ema ? have amAre baso nA Ave. amAre to badhuM AvI gayuM, thaI rahyuM. e DIjhAIna pUrI thaI gayelI. have pUraNa kareluM te galana thAya che. te vaheluM thAya to sAruM ema ukela AvI jAya evI AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) bhAvanA hovI joIe. tame kaho cho, baMdha kevI rIte karavI ? baMdha karyA pachI bagaDI jAya badhuM. praznakartA : nA. e caMdubhAIne ja Ave che, paNa A ukela Avavo joIe. ukelAI jAya to pachI zAMti thaI jAya. 164 dAdAzrI : eka vakhata evo AvI jaze, kharekharo AvI jaze. basa jaze eTale pAchuM dekhAI jaze. tyAM sudhI pratItimAM rahe. jyAre dekhAya tyAre lakSamAM Ave. jyAre phAIla Ave, basa jatI hoya vacce tyAre pratItimAM rahe ke che ja ! AkhI philma lagnatI ja game ? praznakartA : jovA ne jANavAmAM saMgharSa bahu cAle che. eTale je je saMyogo bhegA thAya emAM taNAI javAya che. dAdAzrI : e taNAI jAya to koNa taNAI jAya ? tame to zuddhAtmA. zuddhAtmA zI rIte taNAya ? caMdubhAI nAmanuM pudgala taNAya. praznakartA : e jovA-jANavAmAM sthiratA rahevI joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, e sthiratA rahe nahIM. sthiratA rahe to UlaTI upAdhi thaI paDe. A sinemAnI philma sthira thaI jAya to zuM 'jovAnuM' pachI ? e to cAlu ja rahevI joIe. praznakartA H nahIM, e to cAlu rahe, paNa ApaNe enI sAthe cAlu na thaI jaIe ane ApaNe sthira rahIe e ja. dAdAzrI : nahIM, ApaNe 'joyA' karIe. 'jonAra' to haMmezAM sthira ja hoya. 'jonAra' taNAya nahIM haMmezAM ya. 'jotAM' nathI ApaNe eTale enI mahIM UMdho abhyAsa thaI jAya. jJAyakabhAvamAM rahyA eTale pachI koI dahADo taNAya nahIM ane lAgaNIvaza thayo ke taNAyo. lAgaNIvaza thAya eTale sinemAmAM ya taNAI jAya loko. raDe che huM ke ! are paNa jovAnuM'tuM tyAM raDuM chuM zuM karavA ? jovAnuM hoya tyAM raDe mUo ! raDe kharo ?! ane philma to eka ja prakAranI hoya to jovAnI game ?

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jJAtA-draSTA 165 praznakartA : nA game, dAdA. dAdAzrI : huM. philmamAM ghaDIkavAramAM lagna Ave. ghaDIkamAM mArAmAra thatI hoya, ghaDIkamAM haraNa karI jatA hoya, tyAre jovAnI gamene ! AkhI philmamAM lagna cAlyA kare to nA game ne ? eTale badhI A philma jovAnI che. jarAya AnaMda nA jAya e ApaNuM vijJAna. zakti to AkhI ja che mahIM, paNa avyakta rUpe rahelI che. kema adhUrI rahe che ? ApaNane haju A badhuM game che. chatAM A jJAna pachI ghaNuM kharuM ochuM thaI gayuMne ? jema jema ochuM thaze tema tema zaktio vyakta thaze. game che eno artha tiraskAra nathI karavAno eno. paNa enI mahIM tanmayAkAra thaI jAya, bhUlI jAya pote, potAnI zakti bhUlI jAya ane AmAM tanmayAkAra thaI jAya eTale eno artha game che kahevAya. khAo-pIo paNa tanmayAkAra nA thAva. juo, sinemAmAM jAva cho to kaMI koI sArI baI ke sAro bhaI hoya, to bheTe che ene ? ane koI koIne mArato hoya to tyAM bUma pADe che ke e kema mAruM chuM ? 'nA mArIza' evuM kahe che kaMI ? manamAM samaje che ke jovAnuM ja che A, bolavAnuM nathI. keTalA varSa pahelAM sinemA jovA gayelA ? te dahADe joyeluM kharuM ne paNa ? te kaMI bolatA nahotA ne ke kema mAruM chuM te ? huM, jovAnuM ja che tyAM AgaLa ! e philma evuM nathI kahetI ke tame amane mAthe laI jAva joDe. philama to kahe che ke joIne jAva. pachI tame UMdhuM karo, tenuM philama zuM kare bicArI ? paNa pote guMdara copaDIne jAya eTale pachI zuM thAya ? e guMdara dhoIne javuM paDe. pote guMdara copaDIne jAya eTale je hoya te aDe ne coMTe ! 'jovA'thI thAya hisAba cokhkhA ! praznakartA H kaMI bhUla thatI hoya ne tyAre khabara paDe, ApaNe aMdara vaDhIe paNa kharA ke caMdubhAI, A tame karo cho e sAcuM nathI. to ya pAchAM eka bAjuthI caMdubhAI mAne nahIM ne kare ja. dAdAzrI : eno vAMdho nathI. kAraNa ke 'jonAra' zuddha che. jene 'jue' AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) che, emAM zuddhi che ane azuddhi che, paNa teya sApekSa draSTithI. bAkI, jonArane mATe zuddhi-azuddhi hotI nathI. 'jonAra'ne to badhuM sarakhuM ja che. A badhuM lokonA manamAM sAruM-khoTuM che. bAkI bhagavAnanI draSTie sAruMkhoTuM che nahIM. samAjane sAruM-khoTuM che. bhagavAna to kahe che, 'joI' gayA eTale chUTA thaI gayA. e ya chUTA ane A ya chUTA. eTale zuM thayuM ? ajJAne karIne bAMdhelA hisAba e 'joIne' kADho eTale tame chUTA ane e ya chUTuM. 'joyA' vagara bAMdhelo hisAba, 'joIne' kADho eTale chUTA ! ta thAke philma ke prekSaka ! 166 A badhuM je Ave che ne, A jJeya che ne tame jJAtA thazo, tyAre pUrNAhuti thaze. A jANavAnI vastuo rahI have. mahIMthI je vAvyuM'tuM ne te Uge che have. Uge che ne ene 'joyA' karavuM ApaNe. ane jo tanmayAkAra thaI gayA to A mokSamArga jato raheze. A mokSa tamArA hAthamAM Apelo che. have prazna Ubho nahIM thAya. kampliTa solyuzana raheze. A je prazna UbhA thAya che. A to mahIMthI Uge che. tene tame che te mahIM aMdara praveza karo cho. Uge che temAM ApaNe zuM ? sAmuM phIlma dekhAya che. phIlma evuM nathI kahetI ke tame mArI joDe bhegAM thaI jAva. ApaNe 'jovAnuM' che. paNa A 'jozo' eTale chUTI jaze. ApaNe jJAtA-draSTA ne paramAnaMdI thayA. AkhI jiMdagI dareka kAryo philmanI peTha 'jovA'mAM Ave to koI kArya ene aDe nahIM. philmane jonAro ane philma be judA hoya haMmezAM ke eka ja hoya ? praznakartA : judA hoya. dAdAzrI : philmamAM utarelo philma joI zake ? nA. philmane jonAro hoya te philma jue. paNa jagata philmamAM utareluM che ane tame philma jonArA cho, eTale philma joIe ke bhaI, A jagata cAle che e philma dekhAya che. A badhI philma ja chene badhI. eTale vAta samajavAnI TUMkI ne Taca che. bIjuM kazuM ya che nahIM ! philma ane philmane jonAro bannene thAka nA lAge. jonArane thAka nA lAgene ! philmane thAka nA lAge.

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ziAtA-draSTI 167 168 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : vANI nIkaLe to ya 'joyA' karavuM ? dAdAzrI : vANI nIkaLe to ya 'joyA' karavuM. e nIkaLe toya judA rahevuM. thoDIvAra pachI judA thAya paNa te thavuM joIe. thoDIvAra pachI juduM thAya paNa sTepiMga le. eTale bIjA sTepe khalAsa thaI jAya. ane emAM to joIe to ya aMbAlAla, A jJAnI puruSa vAto karatAM hoyane, te emane dekhAya badhuM. je je karatAM hoya e badhuM dekhAya. eTale tamAre che te A karavAnuM che, A bhAvo karavAnA che. atyAre pahele sTepa dura nA thAya ekadama eTale ekAda sTepa vadhAre, eTale be-traNa avatAra kahIe chIene !. nikAla kare e pudgala dharma ! praznakartA : koI vakhata to phAIlono samabhAve nikAla thato nathI. dAdAzrI : samabhAve nikAla nathI thato e jeNe "jANuM" e Atmadharma ane samabhAve nikAla thavo - nA thavo e pudgaladharma. benAM dharma judA che. pudgalano dharma nA thAya, temAM ApaNe zuM levAdevA ? ApaNe to 'jANuM kharuM ne ? 'jANuM" e ApaNe ApaNA dharmamAM chIe. pudgalano dharma hoya ke nA ya hoya. ApaNe levAdevA nathI. pudgala dharma judo, Atmadharma judo. Atmadharma eTale niraMtara 'jANyA' karavuM, saMpUrNa jAgRti. eka paramANu UDyuM hoya to khabara paDe, enuM nAma AtmA. pArakI pudgala pIDAmAM paDazo nahIM. pudgala to ghaDImAM UMcuM thAya, nIcuM thAya. 'jANyA' karavuM e ApaNo dharma ne UMcA-nIcA thavuM, matabheda thavo e to juno paricaya, vadhe to game ane ghaTe to nA game. e dharma nA rahevo joIe ApaNo. e paricaya pahelAMno che. eTale ApaNe kahI devAnuM ke Ama nathI ApaNuM, A ApaNuM hoya. e pADozInAM pariNAma che. dAdAe nA kahyuM, chatAM ApaNuM mAnIe tene pachI dAdA zuM kare ? eTale ApaNe samabhAve nikAla A rIte karavAno che. eTale chUTako thaI gayo. pachI e kharAba hoya, duniyA vagovI nAkhe evuM hoya to ya paNa ApaNane bAdhaka nathI, ene 'joIe" ja. 'jonAra'ne jovAnI vastu sAthe koI saMbaMdha hoto nathI. jovAnI vastu game evI kharAba hoya to ya mahIM 'jonArane, draSTAne kaMI rAge ya nathI thato ne e ya nathI thato. 'jonArane kaMI levA-devA nathI. mahIM kharAbamAM kharAba AkhuM jagata niMdA kare evAM bhAva utpanna thayA hoya, DiscArjamAM AvyA hoya toya ene ApaNe joyA karavAM. "ohoho ! evuM kevuM caMdubhAI ? tamane to huM lAyaka jANato'to paNa tame cho nAlAyaka', ema kahevuM jarA. praznakartA : barobara che. paNa kharAba bhAva thAya to ? dAdAzrI : kharAba bhAva thAya to ya 'joyA" karavAnuM. kharAba vartana thAya te , 'joyA karo. bolatArate "jANe' te chelle jJAta ! 'caMdubhAI" jyAre vAta karatA hoya ane 'tame' 'joyA' karo, e caMdubhAI zuM bole che, tyAre e karekTa jJAna, chelluM jJAna. enA pachI be pagathiyAM rahyAM, te to ekadama nAnA che. caMdubhAI zuM bolI rahyA che, ene pote 'jANe'. eTaluM Ave to bahu thaI gayuM. bhagavAna kRSNa AvuM karatA hatA ke kRSNa zuM kare che e 'joyA kare. mahAbhAratamAM laDAI thaI tyAre kahe che, kRSNa bhagavAne che te jAte karyuM ? tyAre kahe, "nA, kRSNa bhagavAna 'joyA karatA hatA ke kRSNa zuM kare che !" ATaluM ja "jovAnI' jarUra che. Ane kahevAya jJAtA-draSTA ! jJAtA-draSTAno zo artha che, ke UMcAmAM UMco artha pelo che ke pote aMdarakhAne zuM karI rahyo che ? mana-buddhi-citta-ahaMkAra badhuM zuM karI rahyuM che, e badhAne sarva rIte jANe ane jue basa, bIjuM kazuM nahIM. ane tamAre kayA padamAM AvavAnuM che ! ke caMdubhAI haratAM-pharatAM dekhAya. caMdubhAI pharatAM hoya te tame pachI besIne juo to A caMdubhAI te ghaDie dekhAya. kevI rIte pharyA te tamAre caMdubhAInuM AkhuM zarIra dekhAvuM joIe. bahArano bhAga dekhAvo joIe, aMdarano bhAga vAra lAge. jyAre bahArano bhAga dekhAya judo, te vItarAga thavA mAMDe, pachI saMpUrNa vItarAga thavAya.

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jJAtA-dravya 169 170 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : evuM dekhAya e jJAtA-draSTApaNuM, eTale AtmA judo che. enI bahu lAlaca rAkhavI nahIM. e to bahu moTuM pada kahevAya. ApaNe to A jeTaluM ApyuM che, eTaluM draDha thaI jAya to bahu thaI gayuM. limiTa bAMdhavA jaIe to Aya rahI jAya ne teya rahI jAya. praznakartA : Ape kahyuM ne ke caMdubhAI judA dekhAya, haratAM-pharatAM, ATaluM judApaNuM hovuM joIe, paNa emAM draSTA to caMdubhAInI aMdara ja hoyane ! dAdAzrI : tyAre ja jovAnuM ne ! caMdubhAInI aMdara hoya chatAM ene dekhAya judA. e paNa chelluM pada che, e tamAre to A meM kahyuM che eTaluM ja Ave to bahu thaI gayuM. e sTezane gayA to bIjA badhA sTezana bhegA thaI jaze. have bahArano bhAga eTale zuM ? ke chokaro jato hoya Ama ane chokarAnA gajavAmAMthI paisA paDe, paDatA hoya to pAchaLa ApaNe pahelAM zuM karatA hatA, kakaLATa karI melIe, kUdAkUda karI melIe, 'Ubho rahe, paisA paDe che, Ubho rahe.' hAlI jAya mahIM badhuM. kAraNa ke jIvato hato. caMdubhAI tarIke jIvato hato. eTale evuM thAya ne pachI A jJAtA-draSTA thayo eTale pachI paisA paDe ke je kaMI thavAnuM hoya, te ApaNe cetavaNI apAya, ke 'e bhAI, tArA gajavAmAMthI paisA paDe che." pachI emAM ApaNe AghApAchA nA thaIe kazuM. e to cetavaNI nA ApIe to ya vAMdho nathI. jANe jIvatA hoIe evuM khabara nA paDavI joIe. haju A draSTi UMcI jatI jaze. jIvatA hoya Aje to mahIM kakaLATa karI mele, have to je bhUla thavAnI hoya ke nukasAna javAnuM hoya to thAya, ApaNe jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM. marI gayA hoya to pachI zuM karIe ? pachI bhUlo thAya to ? e badhuM AvI rIte enA jevuM ! choDInA hAthe glAsavera badhA tUTI gayA, to ApaNe jonAra ne jANanAra. basa ! akSareya bolavuM nahIM, jANe jIvatA nA hoIe evI rIte rahevuM. praznakartA : dAdA, tame to bahu TUMka samayamAM kRpALudevanI chellI dazA ApI dIdhI ! dAdAzrI : hA, to kalyANa thaI jAyane, e sAruM. chelle jJAtA-draSTA to, caMdubhAI AvatA-jatA hoya to tamane Ama dekhAya ke ohoho, Avo caMdubhAI, evuM badhuM vAta karatA hoya to ya tamane judA dekhAya. caMdubhAI dAdAjInA page tela ghasatA hoya te tamane dekhAya. ane 'tame" kaho ke "caMdubhAIe bahu sAruM ghasyuM' e chelluM ! praznakartA: Ama AkRti judI dekhAya ke Ama samajaNathI juduM dekhAya ? dAdAzrI : pahelAM samajaNathI juduM dekhAya pachI dhIme dhIme AkRtithI dekhAya. haratAM-pharatAM jema A bIjA koI jatA hoya evAM dekhAya. A bhAI AvatAM-jatAM dekhAya che e samajathI dekhAya che ? praznakartA : nA, AkRtithI.

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[2.2] 'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! A ja che mokSamArga ! A saMsAranuM AkhuM svarUpa ja evuM che ke A sAyanTiphika sarakamasTenziyala eviDansa eTale kudarata badhuM karyA kare ane tamAre 'jANyA' karavAnuM e ja mokSamArga che. tyAre vaLI pAchAM kramikamArgavALA kaheze, emAM AtmAnuM kazuM nahIM ? AtmAnuM emAM AvI ja jAya che. emAM eka eviDansa eno AvI ja jAya che, vibhAvika bhAva ! vibhAvika AtmAnI vibhAva dazA. te emAM eka eviDansa tarIke AvI jAya che. mATe kharekhara paddhatisara kartA nathI e, naimittika kartA che. bIjA saMjogo bhegA thAya tyAre pAchuM thAya ane saMjogonA dhakkAthI vibhAva thAya ane vibhAvathI bIjA saMjogo bhegA thAya. eTale have sAyanTiphika sarakamasTenziyala eviDansa e kare, Ane tamAre 'jANyA' karavuM, to A kevaLajJAna kahevAya. hAtha kapAyo, kApanAra kudarata, tame 'jANyA' karo e badhuM kevaLajJAna ane jyAM sudhI bhogavaTo lAge tyAM sudhI kevaLajJAnanA aMzomAM phera che. A ullAsamAM ne ullAsamAM kevaLajJAna thaI jAya. atyAre kevaLajJAna to thatuM nathI, paNa enAM aMza vadhe. pote to AtmA che ja ane bahAra jo ullAsamAM AvI gayuM, to thaI rahyuM ! eka zaMkA to gayelI che, niHzaMka thayelAM che, pachI joIe zuM ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) Diprezana thayuM hoya to Diprezana 'joyA' karavuM. eliveTa thayuM to eliveTa 'joyA' karavuM. zuM thAya te 'joyA' karo. eliveTa thayA pachI Diprezana AvyA vagara rahe nahIM. jyAre Diprezana AvyA pachI eliveTa thayA vagara rahe nahIM. mATe je thAya e 'joyA' karavAnuM. apa enDa DAuna, DAuna enDa apa. 172 praznakartA H jema samaya jAya, ema A jJAna sajjaDa thatuM jAya ? dAdAzrI : samajaNa paDe tema samAto jAya. ApaNe to samajavAnuM ekaluM ja che. meM je jJAna ApyuM, tenAthI AvaraNa badhAM tUTI gayA, kartApaNuM chUTI gayuM. kAraNo badhAM UDI gayA. have e pariNAma rahyA. pariNAmane zI rIte bhogavavuM ? enAM mATe A samajI lo ! samajathI badho ukela Ave ane eTaluM badhuM samAI jAya ke 'jANe' ekaluM ja. pelo gALa dIdhA kare ne A 'jANyA' kare eTaluM ja, nA rahe evuM ? praznakartA : rahe, dAdA. dAdAzrI : tyAre gALa to zarIrane aDatI nathI. maccharuM kaiDyuM hoya te ya 'jANyA' kare. jo 'jANanAra' che to zarIrathI cheTo che ane 'jANanAra' nA rahyA te ghaDIe zarIramAM che. kharAbate kharAba jANye' e jAya ! praznakartA : have je phAIlo AvI, eno samabhAve nikAla karyo. e prakRtinI je kaMI gUMco hatI, e badhuM ApaNe 'joyA' karIe. e jema jema 'joyA' karIe ema ema prakRti badhI cokhkhI thatI jAya ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : thAya ne ! prakRti badhI cokhkhI thatI jAya. jema tame 'juo'ne, tema tamArI 'jovAnI' zakti vadhatI jAya. kAraNa ke malTiplAya thAya ane cokhkhuM thAya. 'kharAba che' evuM 'jANe' eTale jatuM rahe. koI paNa vastu kharAbane kharAba jANIe tyArathI ja javA mAMDe. jagyA khAlI karI nAkhe. ene jyAM sudhI sAruM che ema mAnIe tyAM sudhI besI rahe. bIjo koI kaThora upAya karavAnI jarUra nathI. A jJAnano ja upAya !

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'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! A je UMdhuM Ave che ne, te to 'jANyuM'ne tame ? eTale jatuM ja rahevAnuM dhIme dhIme. thoDA vakhata pachI jatuM ja raheze. emAM ApaNane khoTa nathI jatI. nA 'jANyuM' hoya tyAre khoTa jAya. 173 kudarate evI kaLA mUkI che ke A jagata baMdha thAya ja nahIM. bhagavAnane paNa baMdha karI devuM hoya to ya nA thAya ! eTale pachI bhagavAne dhIraja pakaDI ke 'zuM bane che' e 'joyA' karo. ane jene chUTavuM hoya te evI dhIraja dharajo. jene A jagata poSAtuM nA hoya, te zuM banyA kare che te 'joyA' karo to chUTazo. 'ame' paNa evuM ja karIe chIe. saMga - asaMga - satsaMga praznakartA : Apa je jJAna Apo cho temAM juduM to paDe che, paNa temAM mArI kaMI kacAza rahI gaI haze ? dAdAzrI : nA. kazI kacAza nahIM. kyAM kyAM vRttio jAya che ane kyAMthI Ave che ? ane lAve che zuM ? ane laI jAya che zuM ? e badhuM 'joyA' karIe. pachI ethI vadhAre AgaLanuM hamaNe A evI khoTI AzAo rAkhavI nahIM. hamaNe A 'jovAya' ne to bahu thaI gayuM. bhagavAne kahyuM hatuM ke 'vRttio nA dekhAya to ya rAga-dveSa nathI thatAM ne ?' tyAre kahe, 'nA'. eTale 'thaI gayuM' ! have 'jovAnuM' zuM che ? pudgalanA udayane ja 'jovAnuM' che. paNa udaya jyAre evo jozabaMdha bhAre hoya tyAre dhUMdhaLuM 'dekhAya'. eTale 'jovAnuM' samajAya ja nahIM, cUkI jAya. udaya jo halako hoya ne to udaya ekabAju cAlyA kare ne 'ApaNe' 'jotA' hoIe. caMdubhAIne tame 'juo' e ja chelluM jJAna. praznakartA : e bAju jovAmAM ja ApaNo niraMtara upayoga rahe, mATe ApaNe evI kaI kriyA karavI ke jethI vadhAre upayoga rahI zake ? dAdAzrI : A bAjunA saMjogo, satsaMga taraphanA hovA joIe. praznakartA : mAre saMjoga evAM nathI. to ekAMta hoya to vadhAre sAruM ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : te ekAMta vadhAre hitakArI hoya ne ! paNa ekAMta hoya kyAMthI ? evI puNya kyAMthI hoya saMyoga vagara ?! A saMyogo ja du:khadAyI che ne ! praznakartA : have ekAMta zene kaho cho Apa ? dAdAzrI : bIjA saMyogo bhegA nA thAya, koI Dakhala karanAruM nA hoya, ApaNuM svataMtra hoya. ane pachI ApaNe caMdubhAI zuM kare che te badhuM 'joyA' karIe. upayoga mUko eTale dekhAyA kare badhuM. 174 praznakartA : ApaNane khabara paDe ke mahIM zuM AvyuM ne zuM gayuM to e... dAdAzrI : to e ja jJAna. caMdubhAI Ama AkhA nA dekhAya. paNa mahIM zuM AvyuM-gayuM e badhuM dekhAya, e paheluM jJAna. pachI dhIme dhIme peluM AkhuM thatuM jAya. jagatane to AvyuM-gayuM e khyAla nA hoya. paheluM e sthULa jovAnuM. ema karatAM A pachI eDavAnsa thatuM jAya, sUkSmamAM. pachI chevaTe badhuM pote judo ja dekhAyA kare. praznakartA : e nathI dekhAtuM ! dAdAzrI : e dhIme dhIme thAya. ekadama nA thAya A. eka kalAke ya nA thAya koIthI. amane ya saMyoga hoya tyAre ekjhekTa nA thAyane ! praznakartA : eTale Apa paNa ekAMta mATe kaho cho ne, ke ekAMta sArI vastu che. dAdAzrI : paNa lokone khaseDIne ekAMta nA karavuM. ApaNe koIne khaseDIne ekAMta nA karavuM. saMyogono svabhAva ja che ke enI meLe viyoga thaI jaze. praznakartA : ema juo to koI saMyogI vastu ApaNane aDatI nathI. jo ApaNe asaMga rahevuM hoya to badhAMnI vacce asaMga rahI zakAya che. dAdAzrI : rahI zakAya, khuzIthI rahI zakAya. che ja asaMga. evo zuddhAtmA che A. huM asaMga ja chuM. nirlepa ja chuM. pelI mAnyatA tUTI gaI

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'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! eTale gayuM. e roMga mAnyatA hatI. tethI to loka kahe, 'huM asaMga kevI rIte kahevAuM ?' ema nA kahe loko ? ane tamane to potAne samajAya ke A roMga mAnyatA tUTI. 175 praznakartA H ApaNI phAIla naMbara eka che, enA mATe ekAMta kAmanuM kharuM ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : hoya to lAbhakArI. ekAMta to bahu lAbhakArI. A ame badhAM beThAM hoyane to sUIne AMkho mIMcIne ekAMta khoLIe. nahIM to AMkha UghADI hoya ne mArA sAmuM koI jue to pachI ekAMta rahe nahIM ne ! anubhavamAM Ave evuM ? tanmayAkAra thAya tene jovAtuM ! praznakartA : ajJAnIne A bAju lakSa ja nathI eTale e 'joI' nahIM zake. dAdAzrI : nA, ema nahIM. e to sAro vicAra Avyo eTale 'mane ja Avyo' ema e kahe. tanmayAkAra ja hoya haMmezAM. bahu nA gamato hoya, apriya vicAra Ave tyAre e cheTo rahe ! jelamAM jaIza to zuM thaze ?!' evA vicAra Ave ke cheTo rahe, nahIM to gamatA vicAromAM tanmayAkAra thayA vagara rahe ja nahIM. ane ApaNane mananA badhAM 'zeya dekhAya'. mananI badhI avasthA 'joI' zake, cittanI badhI avasthA 'joI' zake, buddhinI avasthA 'joI' zake, aMtaHkaraNanI avasthA 'joI' zake, ahaMkAranI avasthA 'joI' zake. ahaMkAra UMco caDhyo che ke nIce Utaryo che te 'joI' zake. sAdhAraNa mANaso, jJAna vagaranAM mANaso koI 'joI' zake nahIM. praznakartA : koI kharAba vicAra Ave ne tarata jato rahe. basa, bIjuM kaMI nahIM, to e zuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : A to badhA jatAM ja rahe. A gADI AvatI hoya ne Ama jatI hoya to evo bhaya lAge ke mArI pAse Avaze to zuM karIza ? aMdara cAlyA ja kare, e ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM. manamAM je thAya, udvega AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) thAya ke adhovega thAya, je vega thAya te 'joyA' karavAnuM. ApaNe jJAtAdraSTA svabhAvamAM rahevuM. bIjI badhI jaDa vastuo che. cetana jevI dekhAya che paNa che jaDa. have je manamAM Ave che ne, e vicAro badhAM 'joyA' karavAnA. 'joyA' karazone eTale badhuM rAge paDI jaze. e to ApaNane evuM lAge ke avaLuM-savaLuM thaI gayuM. kaMI avaLuM-savaLuM thayuM ja nathI. 176 praznakartA : vicAra Ave ne pachI tanmayAkAra thAya, citta phoTo batAve te tanmayAkAra dazA kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : e to DiscArja chene, eno vAMdho nahIM. e to ApaNe 'jANyuM' ke A citta batAve che. jANanAro chUTTo ja che. karanAro bhAMjagaDavALo hoya, paNa jANanAro chUTTo ja hoya ne ! ApaNe chUTTA ne chUTTA ! taDe kartApaNuM, nahIM ke kukriyA ! A to samajIne zamAvAnuM che. udayakarmanAM je doSa hoya, te doSane 'jANe' tyArathI chUTyo. te pachI suTeva hoya ke kuTeva hoya, tenI sAthe ApaNe levAdevA nathI. 'jANakAra' hovo joIe. te mahAtmAne A kuTeve ya nathI ne suTeve ya nathI. A suTeva-kuTeva e bhrAMtinA svabhAvanI che. caMdubhAI ja bhrAMtinA svabhAvathI che. A je jajamenTa che te bhrAMtinAM hisAbe che. ahIM AgaLa khoTAM paDe che. eTale suTeva-kuTeva beu bAjue mUkAvI dIdhI ne ApaNe jJAna ApIe tyAre bolIe chIe ne, puNyAcAra-pApAcAra baMnethI judA, dvaMdvathI taddana judA, eTale dvaMdvAtIta dazA che. ane game tevA kharAbamAM kharAba doSa dekhAya paNa jo enA tame jJAtA cho to tamane kazo vAMdho nathI. pArakAnAM ghera kazuM thAya, emAM ApaNe zuM ? pADozIne ghera rAMDe, temAM ApaNe kaMI raDavAnI jarUra che ? ApaNe tyAM jaIne AzvAsana ApIe ke bhaI, jarA zAMti rAkhaje. udayakarma bhagavAna mahAvIre ya jANyA karatA hatA. mAMkaDa kaiDatA hatA, tene pote jANyA karatA hatA, ke deha AkhI rAta pAsAM pherave che. deha to sahana nA karI zake. e to ahaMkArI ja sahana karI zake. e kahe ke mane kazuM kaiDe to huM kaMI hAluM nahIM. eTale evuM nakkI ja karI nAkhe. paNa bhagavAnamAM to kazo ahaMkAra hoya nahIM ne ! bilakuleya ahaMkAra hoya nahIM.

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'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! 177 178 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) atyAre A kasAI hoyane, ene huM jJAna ApuM ne e jo jJAnamAM rahe ne AtmadraSTithI 'joyA" ja kare badhuM, bIjAmAM Dakho nA kare, mArI AjJAmAM rahe to e mokSe jAya. kasAInI kriyA naDatI nathI, 'huM karuM chuM" e naDe che. eka avatAra game te thAya paNa tame 'joyA ja karo ne AjJAmAM raho to eka avatAramAM mokSe javAya tevuM A jJAna che. praznakartA: jIva bacAvavA davA karavI, enA karatAM 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM', ema karatAM karatAM deha chUTI jAya to emAM sAruM karyuM? dAdAzrI : e to zuM bane che e "jovuM', e sAruM kahevAya. eTale AtmA potAnA dharmamAM AvI gayo. mana mananA dharmamAM che. AMkho AMkhanA dharmamAM, kAna kAnanA dharmamAM che. (vyavahAra)AtmA bIjA dharmone potAnA dharmo mAnato hato. meM sAMbhaLyuM, mane vicAra Avyo, te AtmA AtmAnA dharmamAM, jJAtA-draSTA dharmamAM AvI gayo. jJAyakabhAvamAM Avyo eTale thaI gayuM, pUruM thaI gayuM kAma. praznakartA: 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM, huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM lakSa rahe ane khoLiyuM chUTI jAya to sukhI thaI jaIe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe choDavAnI dAnata nahIM karavAnI ane nahIM choDavAnI ya dAnata nahIM karavAnI. ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM. jyAre chUTavuM hoya tyAre chUTache. jJAtA-draSTA konuM nAma kahevAya ke dArUkhAnuM phUTatuM hoya to phUTe, te jue. jJAtA-draSTA ene "jue'. ane potAnuM dhotiyuM baLI gayuM te ya jue. ohoho, A ya baLyuM ! AtmajJAta vitA tahIM jJAyaka ! A caMdubhAInuM zarIra che e badhuM joya che ane tame jJAtA cho. jJAtA-draSTA banne cho ane jJAyaka eTale jANavAno ne jovAno e svabhAva ja potAno che, bIjo koI svabhAva nathI. te A caMdubhAI drazya ane zeya che. A caMdubhAInA dareka sperapArTaya badhuM drazya ane zeya che. evuM mana e paNa drazya ne zeya che. mana zuM vicAre che te jANavAnuM ja khAlI. emAM pachI mahIM hAtha ghAlavAno nahIM. hAtha ghAle to dajhAya. - have jJAna vagara mANasa manane zeya karI zake nahIM. ApaNuM jJAna nA ApyuM hoya to mana sAthe ekAkAra thaI ja jAya, enA kahyA pahelAM thaI jAya ane A jJAna pachI pote judo rahI zake. ene 'joyA karavAnuM, basa ! A zarIra zuM karI rahyuM che, ene "jANavuM joIe. ApaNe jaja sAheba jajamenTa ApatA hoya to paNa emane jANavuM joIe ke A jaja zuM karI rahyA che. e ApaNuM jJAna ane jaja zuM karI rahyA che e emanuM. banne potapotAnI che te pharaja bajAve che. AtmA AtmAnI pharaja bajAve ane sAheba sAhebanI pharaja bajAve. tame sAhebane oLakho ke nA oLakho ? mANasa sArA che ne ke thoDA kharAbe ya che ? praznakartA: thoDA kharAbe ya che. dAdAzrI : juo, oLakhe ne ! 'huM ja chuM sAheba', kahe to AvuM niSpakSapAtI bole ? jJAna lIdhelAnuM phaLa zuM? jyAM Agraha che tyAM jJAna nathI. jJAna che tyAM Agraha nA hoya. jJAna eTale nirAgrahI. praznakartA : nirAgrahI. dAdAzrI : te caMdubhAI Agraha kare, durAgraha kare tene jANavuM, enuM nAma jJAna. tame jAte ja caMdubhAI thaI jAva pachI jJAna kyAM rahyuM che ?! 'huM maMdiramAM darzana karuM chuM ke huM Ama karuM chuM' evuM badhuM tamAre karavAnuM hoya nahIM. tamAre to caMdubhAI zenA darzana kare che e badhuM 'joyA' karavAnuM. jotAro jaMgI AkhI ya sarakho ! praznakartA : eka drazya, eka paristhiti, eka vastu nAnapaNamAM je joI hoya dasa-bAra varSanI uMmare. e batrIsa-tetrIsa varSanI uMmare jue, sAITha-bAsaTha jue, nevuM varSe e jue, jonAro eka ja che. dAdAzrI : jonAro eka ja. praznakartA : paNa emAM jonArAne Akho bheda kema lAge che ?

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caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! 179 180 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : evuM che ne, anubhava jema jema pharatA jAya che ema badho bheda pharato jAya. anubhava eka ja prakArano hoto nathI. pAMca varSe ene A ramakaDAmAM jyAM prema hato tyAM anubhava emAM ja hato ke AnA vagara sukha ja nathI. eTale tyAM AgaLa joto hato. have vIsa varSano thAya e evuM nA jue. eTale anubhava jema jema pharato jAya tema tema e jonAranI draSTi badalAtI jAya. praznakartA : nA, paNa emAMthI anubhava thAya ne ema kahe ke A nakAmuM che. eTale vIsa varSe je kAmanuM lAgatuM hoya, e cAlIsa varSa nakAmuM lAge. dAdAzrI : nakAmuM ja lAge. praznakartA: paNa AtmA je che, e te vakhate ya jonAro hato, jJAtA-draSTA hato. vIsa varSa e ya jJAtA-draSTA che. cAlIse ya e ja... dAdAzrI : ane jatI vakhate ya te jJAtA-draSTA ja che. emanA jJAnadarzanamAM phera nahIM. kAraNa ke pote pheraphAra rahita che. kucAritranuM jANapaNuM e ja cAstri ! praznakartA : cAritramAM A badhuM AvavuM joIe ne ? dAdAzrI : cAritramAM lAvavAnI jarUra nathI. kucAritra jANe, enuM nAma cAritra. sArA cAritranI mastI Ave e kucAritra, e bhayaMkara jokhamadAra. praznakartA : to amAre kSAyaka samakitano ahaMkAra Ave te... dAdAzrI : jJAna ApIe to ahaMkAra to nA Ave paNa mastI Ave, eya khoTuM pAchuM ! praznakartA: te pachI tame to pachI koI jAtano AnaMda rahevA jevI jagyA ja nathI rahevA detA. AbhAsI AnaMda zuM levAno ? mastIo levAnI hoya ? mastI to, A bahAranA loko laukika dharmane dharma mAne che, e loko mananI mastImAM, dehanI mastImAM, vANInI mastImAM, AkhuM jagata mastImAM bhamI rahyuM che. bAvA-bAvalI, sAdhu-saMnyAsIo badhAM mastImAM ja paDyA che. te ya Akho dahADo mastI nA rahe. thoDIka vAra, pachI pAchuM hatuM tenuM te. pachI mastI Ave ! ane ahIM to mastI nA hovI joIe. praznakartA : paNa ame to bIjI badhI mastI choDI ane ame have dAdAnI mastImAM rahIe chIe. dAdAzrI : e mastI nA gaNAya. bAkI, sArA cAritranI mastI hoya, te UlaTuM nukasAna kare che. enA karatAM kucAritranuM 'jANapaNuM' e phAyado kare che. kucAritrane 'jANe" e AtmacAritra. praznakartA : ame kucAritrane 'jANyuM to kharuM, paNa pojhiTiva cAritranAM koI jAtanAM AnaMda vagara jIvavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : "jANe" te ghaDIe AnaMda hoya ja, ne 'kare' te ghaDIe du:kha hoya. praznakartA: have amAruM kucAritra "jANuM', te vakhate to AnaMda zeno hoya ? e to duHkha-vairAga thAya ke A kucAritra 'jANyuM'. dAdAzrI : kucAritrano svabhAva ja evo che ke potAnuM e jANapaNuM khovAI jAya. jo eTalI badhI jAgRti thayelI hoya ane kucAritramAM jJAna hAjara rahe, 'jANapaNuM', to e UMcAmAM UMcuM cAritra che. praznakartA : paNa vaMkAyeluM dekhAya te vakhate duHkha to thAyane? dAdAzrI : e hoya vaMkAyeluM. bhagavAnane tyAM vaMkAyeluM nathI, samAjamAM vaMkAyeluM che. samAja zuM kahe che ? eTale A vAMko ne A sIdho, A nAlAyaka ne A lAyaka e badhAM dvandravALo samAja che. bhagavAnane tyAM eka ja vastu che. badhA joya ja che. dAdAzrI : baLyuM, AnaMda to, potAnA svarUpamAMthI AnaMda lo ne !

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'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! 181 rtA thayo to lAge doSa ! 'phAIla naMbara eka' khAya, nhAya, saMDAsa jAya, tyAre jo tyAM moDuM thayuM hoya to bUmAbUma karI mUke. tyAM ya jo javA nA dene, to vaDhavADa kare. alyA, saMDAsa javAnuM kaMI mahattvanuM ? tyAre kahe, e ya mahattvanuM. jyAre nA javA de, tyAre khabara paDe ke mahattvanuM che ke nahIM. dAtaNa kare, khAya, doDadhAma kare e badhuM 'joyA' karavuM ApaNe. praznakartA : ATalI badhI upAdhi zA mATe karAvavI ? na karAvAya to nA cAle ? dAdAzrI : e chone kare ! e upAdhivALA ja che. caMdubhAI to janmyA tyArathI ja upAdhivALA ! praznakartA : ene kahevAnuM grUpa, mane besI rahevA de, khabaradAra jo... dAdAzrI : nahIM, khabaradAra nahIM kahevAnuM. ApaNe polIsavALA nathI. ApaNe bhagavAna chIe ! polIsavALA evuM kare khabaradAra ke nA khabaradAra, ApaNe to bhagavAna chIe, 'joyA' karavAnuM. ApaNe ApaNA jJAtA-draSTA svabhAvamAM ane e kartA svabhAvamAM. kartA svabhAvavALo upAdhi karyA ja karavAno. pudgala kartA svabhAvanuM che. praznakartA : A pudgalane to nhAvuM che, dhovuM che, evuM karavuM che. ApaNe kyAM evuM karavuM che ? dAdAzrI : caMdubhAI zuM kare che e ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM. bIjo kazo dharma nahIM. tame tamArA svabhAvamAM, caMdubhAI caMdubhAInA svabhAvamAM. tAre jyAM pharavuM hoya tyAM phara kahIe, tAro bhaTakavAno svabhAva. te bhamaraDo eno TAIma thaI jAya eTale paDI jaze. bhamaraDo to pharyA ja kare ne ? te A ye bhamaraDo ja che. mana kare che badhuM, AtmA karato nathI. praznakartA : manathI doSa lAge ne ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : nA, 'huM karuM chuM', evuM mAnIe to doSa lAge. 'huM kartA chuM, A zubhano kartA huM chuM, azubhano kartA huM chuM' tyAM sudhI doSa lAge. tyAM sudhI karma baMdhAya. paNa potAnAM svarUpamAM AvI gayo, pachI kartAbhoktA maTyo. tyArathI pachI doSa nA lAge, pachI saMvara rahe ! Ama khAlI thAya mamatA ! 182 praznakartA : mana-vacana-kAyAnI mamatA khalAsa karavI hoya to zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : e mamatAne 'jovI'. teM joyelI hoLI ? hoLImAM hAtha ghAlIe to AnaMda rahe ke 'joIe' to AnaMda rahe ? praznakartA : 'joIe' to AnaMda. dAdAzrI : to 'jovAnI' ApaNe A. caMdubhAInI mamatAne 'jovI'. praznakartA : paNa AmAM kharAba karmano udaya Ave to pAcho palaTo nA thaI jAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. kazuM thAya nahIM. je udaya Ave ene 'joyA' karavAnuM. caMdubhAI gAMDAM kADhatA hoya to ya tamAre 'joyA' karavAnuM. tethI kaMI ApaNane nukasAna nathI. mahIM je bharelo mAla che te evA gAMDAM kADhe vakhate. sAro bharyo hoya to DAhyAM ye kADhe ! tame zuddhAtmA cho ane bIjuM kazuM karavAnuM nathI. mULa vastu pAmI gayA pachI kazuM rahyuM ja nahIM. have caMdubhAI zuM kare che, konA chokarAM caMdubhAI ramADe che, e badhuM ApaNe 'jovAnuM'. 'konA chokarAM ? tamArA chokarAMne ramADo cho ?' eTale evuM kahevAnuM, paNa A badhuM 'jovAnuM' ApaNe. praznakartA : paNa e 'jovAmAM' nathI rahevAtuM. dAdAzrI : e tamAre pUruM nA rahevAya. ame karIzuM eno pAcho rasto. paNa 'jovAnuM' ja A khAlI.

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'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! praznakartA : eTale caMdubhAIthI judA to chIe, paNa vartanamAM evuM dekhAtuM nathI hajI. 183 dAdAzrI : vartanamAM nA hoya e to. ApaNe 'jovAnuM' ja hoya phakta. manamAM kharAba vicAra Ave to kharAba khabara paDe ane sAro vicAra Ave to sArI khabara paDe. e badhuM khabara nA paDe ApaNane ? praznakartA : e paDe. dAdAzrI : to e ja 'jonAro'. e AtmA 'jonAro'. tamane rAgadveSa konI konI para thAya che ? praznakartA : nathI thatA. dAdAzrI : tyAre e ja AtmA. ane te 'joyA' ja kare che badhuM, manamAM kharAba vicAra Avyo to ya. sAro vicAra Avyo hoya, bIjuM thayuM hoya, trIjuM thayuM hoya, tarata ja 'joyA' kare badhuM. ko'ka vANI zuM bolyo, koI kharAba vANI bolyo hoya ke sArI bolyo hoya to ya paNa rAgadveSa nA thAya, enuM nAma AtmA. ane rAga-dveSa thAya, enuM nAma saMsAra. 'juo', krimitala ke sivila gutAone ?! praznakartA : pahelAno je bhAsa thaI gayo che, ene kADhavA mATe zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : ene levA-devA nahIM, caMdubhAIne zuM thaI gayuM che e ApaNe 'jovAnuM' che. tame judA ne caMdubhAI judA. pachI caMdubhAI cIDAtA hoya, te ya 'joyA' karavAnuM ane caMdubhAI che te phUlahAra caDAvatA hoya te ya 'joyA' karavAnuM. tame jJAtA-draSTA ane caMdubhAI kartA, evI rIte raho to phiTa thaze ne rahe kAyamanuM. tame chUTA paDyA pachI have tame jJAtA-draSTAnA dharmamAM ja AvI gayA. caMdubhAIne judA pADyA eTale judo ne judo ja bhAva rAkhavo paDe. vartamAnamAM zuM karavAnuM ? tyAre kahe, je kaMI kare te caMdubhAI kare, AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) teno ApaNane vAMdho have nathI. kriminala ke sivila che ? e badhuM kharAbasAruM jovAnI jarUra nathI ApaNe. loka Ane bhAga pADatA hoyane, bahAra to jyAM sudhI jJAna nA hoya tyAM sudhI bhAga pADene, A sivila AvyuM ne A kriminala. have DipholTara hau thAya. ApaNe to DipholTarane 'jANavAno' che, phakta. tame jJAtA-draSTA svabhAvamAM AvyA, zuddha ja svabhAvamAM AvyA. bIjuM kaMI ja tamAre hoya nahIM have. DipholTara che ke zuM che e jovAnuM ne jANavAnuM. ane vyavahAra che tyAM sudhI hisAbe ya kADhavo paDe ke A ahIM jarA haju kAcuM che. ahIM AgaLa barobara thayuM che. haju A thoDuMka ahIM karavAnuM che. ahIM pratikramaNa karavAnA bAkI che. vyavahAra che tyAM sudhI e hisAba kADhavo paDe ne ? e ja jovAnuM che ne ? 184 jotAM jotAM sArA-khoTAnA bhAgamAM nA paDI jatAM ? e to mULathI saravALe khoTa ja che. emAM kaMI kamAyA nathI. tyAre ApaNe nA kamAyA to te dhaMdho ja choDI devo. sArA-khoTAmAM kamAyA nahIM ne ? praznakartA : nA. e caMdubhAI karyA kare. dAdAzrI : huM. 'ApaNe' 'joyA' karIe. praznakartA : dAdAnI vAta sAMbhaLyA pachI paNa bIjI badhI vAto karIe chIe, carcA karIe chIe. dAdAzrI : e to karIe chIe evuM nathI, paNa badhuM tamAruM thaI jAya che. emAM tamAre 'joyA' karavAnuM hoya. tame 'karatA' nathI. tame karatA ho to batAvo. praznakartA : sAme cAlIne AvI paDe te nimitta ke sAme cAlIne nimitta banavuM vyavahAramAM, lagna vageremAM ? dAdAzrI : A vyavahAramAM, lagna vageremAM sAmethI AvI paDe, te 'ApaNe' kyAM javAnuM che, e to 'caMdubhAI'ne javAnuM che ne ! tamAre mATe to kazuM kAma ja rAkhyuM nathI. meM to kazuM kAma tamane soMpyuM nathI ne !

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'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! 185 186 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) joyA karo, pUraNatuM galata ! jJAtA-draSTA ApaNe thayA ane cAlaze zI rIte ? to kahe che, 'vyavasthita' zakti mahIM preraNA Apaze. te AdhAre caMdubhAInuM cAlyA karaze. caMdubhAI gALAgALI kare, mArAmArI kare to ya e ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM. ATaluM ja ApaNuM vijJAna che A. pUraNa kareluM ne e galana thAya che. je pUreluM te galana to thayA vagara rahe ja nahIM ne ! eno vAMdho nahIM rAkhavAno, tamAre 'joyA' karavAnuM. jevuM pUraNa karyuM hoya tevA prakAranuM galana thaze. bahu kaDaka karyuM hoya to kaDaka nIkaLaze, ThaMDuM karyuM haze to ThaMDuM nIkaLaze. paNa e galana to thaye ja chUTako chene, TAMkIno bharelo mAla hato ! bhUla nA thAya AvI, nahIM to bahu UMcuM A jJAna che, pachI baphAI jaze kesa Akho. kriyA jUnI ApaNe AvI karelI hoya, tenuM phaLa AvyuM. te 'joyA' karavAnuM. pharI navo vepAra karIe tyAre vAMdho Ave ne ! kANa ane vAjAM beu sarakhA Seya ! ame to amArI jAtane zuM mAneluM, ame je chIe e chIe, aMtaHkaraNamAM bIjA koInuM sAMbhaLeluM ja nahIM. AmAMthI mana-buddhi-cittaahaMkAra A badhA bole, koInuM sAMbhaLeluM nahIM. tyAre sthira rahelAne ! A to keTalA badhA bahu sarasa bole, benDavAjAM vagADe ane keTalAMka to kANa karavA Ave. alyA, benDavAjA vagADyA karatA hatA, have kANa karavA AvyA cho ?! tame koNa, alyA mUA ?! e benDanA vAjAM mane game to kANavALAnuM mane vAMdho Avene ?! A mAruM ane A parabhAyuM, sva-paranI bhedarekhA dekhADe che, te lAyaka samakita kahevAya. samyak darzana beu bhedarekhA nA batAve. samyak darzana eTale zuM ke A huM chuM evuM mane have bhAse che ema. eTale thoDI thoDI pratIti besatI jAya. pachI UThI jAya, thoDIvAra pachI UThe-bese, pAchI UThe-bese ane A kSAyaka samakita kAyama pratIti rahe ane A ja huM ane A juduM, A huM ane A juduM. have judAmAM be prakAra, ghaDIkamAM che te benDavAjAM laIne Ave ne moTA moTA zaNagAra karIne Ave ane ghaDIkamAM kANa kADhavA taiyAra thAya. te peluM benDavAjAM Ave tyAre khuza thaI jaIe ane peluM kANa kADhavA Ave tyAre Dipresa thaI jaIe. ane A have khuza thavAnuM ne Dipresa thavAnuM nahIM, ene 'joyA' ja karavAnuM. eTale A vAjAM vAge tene ya khAlI 'jovAnAM' che. pachI A jo AmAM vAjAM vagADyAmAM eno rasa cAkhIzuM to kANa kADhaze teno pAcho rasa cAkhavo paDaze. te vakhate gamaze nahIM. enA karatAM kANa kADhe, te rasa nA cAkhavo hoya to pahelAM cAkhazo ja nahIM, 'jovAnuM' che. A cAkhavA mATe nathI. kSAyaka darzana konuM nAma ? potAnuM e potAnuM ane pArakuM e pArakuM. pArakuM levA-devA nahIM, ApaNe je potAnA 'jANIe" e to zeya vastuo che, 'jANavAnI' ja jarUra che, cAkhavAnI vastuo hoya. banne dekhAya kharAM, vAjAMvALo hoya te ya ne kANavALuM hoya te ya, dekhAya kharuM ne ? kAraNa ke eka ja prakAranuM nA hoya pudgala. pudgala haMmezAM virodhAbhAsa ane jAtajAtanuM hoya. jovA-jANavAthI thAya nirjarA pUrNa ! e tamane khabara paDe ke Ama thAya che, tema thAya che. eTaluM to khabara paDe ane peluM khabara nA paDe, bebhAnapaNuM che. praznakartA : paNa e je khabara paDe, te ApaNe 'joyA' karIe chIe ke A caMdubhAIne thaI rahyuM che. dAdAzrI : ene 'joyA' karavAnuM. ApaNane khabara paDavI joIe ke bhaI, A zuM thaI rahyuM che ? basa. praznakartA : paNa e pariNAma e AvyuM che atyAre, e kaMIka AgalA bhavanI bhUlanuM pariNAma che ne ? dAdAzrI : e hisAba to ApaNA karelA, AgalA bhavanA. AgalA karmanA phaLa che A. AgalA bhavanAM karma to yojanA rUpe hoya che ane pachI ahIMyAM rUpakamAM AvyAM hoya, tenuM A phaLa che.

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'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo !! 187 praznakartA : paNa enA kaMI pratikramaNa karavAnI jarUra nathI ? dAdAzrI : pratikramaNa to emAM karavAnuM hotuM nathI. phakta 'jovAnuM' ne "jANavAnuM' ja rahe che. pratikramaNa to koI mANasanI joDenI bhAMjagaDa hoya to pratikramaNa karavAM paDe. praznakartA: ApaNe 'joIe' ke A ApaNe bhUla karelI, enuM pariNAma che. dAdAzrI : bhUla, e to chUTako ja nahIM ne ! badhI ya bhUlo ja che ne ApaNI. eTale A Ane tamAre 'jovAnuM" ne 'jANavAnuM', e nirjarA thayA kare. DakhoDakhalate ya "jANo! praznakartA : dAdAnI AjJA barAbara pALIe chatAM ya saMsAramAM DakhoDakhala thaI jAya, to tenuM zuM kAraNa ? dAdAzrI : e thaI jAya, tene 'jANavI' joIe ApaNe. jANavAnI vastu e joya che. saMsAramAM je badhI vastuo thAya che e joya che ane tame jJAtA cho. e drazya che ane tame draNa cho. potAnA svabhAvamAM rahevAnuM. praznakartA : ApaNe zuddhAtmA chIe evuM ApaNe jANIe chIe, paNa ApaNI phAIla hoya, e A jJAna nA jANatI hoya ane DakhoDakhala kare to ApaNe zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : DakhoDakhala 'joyA' karavAnI. je thAya e 'joyA' karavAnuM. sahana karavuM paDe, ene "joyA' karavAnuM. ApaNo hisAba che badho. pArakA mANasanI Dakhala nathI koInI. 188 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) emAM be jaNa jhaghaDatA hoya ne eka jaNa khoTo hoya, to ApaNe mauna rahevuM ? kAraNa ke ApaNe pelAne kahIe eTale sAcuM mAne nahIM. dAdAzrI : mauna rahevA-karavAnuM nahIM. zuM thAya che e 'jovuM'. mauna rahevAnuM kahIe to ya bagaDyuM ane kahevAnuM kahIe to ya bagaDyuM. caMdubhAI enI meLe ja kUdaze, tame jo jo to kharAM. e ghaDIe caMdubhAI zuM kare che e 'jovAnuM'. praznakartA : khoTuM thaI rahyuM che chatAM caMdubhAIne ema lAge ke nathI bolavuM, to ? dAdAzrI : nA. e khoTuM thaI rahyuM che jene lAgene te ja bole. caMdubhAI zuM kare che e 'jovuM'. caMdubhAIne ApaNe doravaNI nahIM ApavI ke Ama karo ke tema karo. tame uttaramAM jAva, dakSiNamAM jAva. ApaNe kahevAnI jarUra nahIM. e uttaramAM jAya che ke dakSiNamAM jAya che e 'jovuM'. eTale pelA bemAMthI eka jaNane dhola mArI deze to teya 'jovuM'. dhola mAryAno ya vAMdho nathI, paNa zuM kare che e 'juo'. praznakartA vacce dhola evI koI ApaNane mArI jAya te ya 'jovuM ? dAdAzrI : te ya 'jovuM'. paNa to ja abhyAsa karatAM karatAM thAyane ! chevaTe to e abhyAsa upara AvavuM paDazene ? Aje nahIM ne AvatA avatAramAM paNa evo roja abhyAsa to karavo paDene ? atyArathI ja karI rAkhyo hoya thoDoghaNo to zuM khoTo ?! abhyAsa paNa karI rAkhyo hoya to sAruMne ? thoDoghaNo jeTalo thAya eTalo. tyAM caMdubhAI zuM kare che e 'joyA" karavAnuM. ameya 'A paTela' zuM kare che e 'joyA' karIe. zuM khAya che ? zuM pIve che ? zAno zokha che ? e badhuM 'joyA' karIe. zokha hoya to mAre vaDhIne baMdha karAvavo nathI, je ho te bhale ho. A to ko'ka phero evuM AghuMpAchuM thaI jAya, bAkI jJAtA-draSTA svabhAvamAM AvyA eTale A jJAtA-draSTA caMdubhAIno doSa dekhADe ane caMdubhAI pelA sAmevALAno doSa dekhADe. be jhaghaDe tyAre zuM karavuM ? praznakartA : vyavahAramAM ApaNe jJAtA-draSTAbhAva keLavavAno. have

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10 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) 'caMdu' zuM kare che, 'joyA' karo ! 189 praznakartA H aMdarathI evuM thAya ke ApaNe jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM che, kazuM karavuM nathI ane bahArathI vartana evuM thAya ke pelAne lApho mArI daIe. dAdAzrI : caMdubhAI zuM kare che e "juo', pachI ApaNe kahevuM, 'caMdubhAI, AvuM zA sAru karo cho ? AnAM pratikramaNa karo" eTaluM kahevuM. praznakartA : eTaluM kahIe to pahoMcI jAya ? dAdAzrI : badhuM ja pahoMcI jAya. Takora ja karavAnI. ochA caMdubhAI abhaNa hatA. badhuM jANatA hatA. paNa prakRtine AdhIna thaI gayuM ! praznakartA : jyAre AvuM thAya tyAre dareka vakhate pelo aMdarathI vicAra Ave che ke A khoTuM thAya che. AvuM kema thAya ? dAdAzrI : khoTuM thAya che ne kharuM thAya che, enI bhAMjagaDamAM ApaNe utaravAnuM nathI. e enI meLe caMdubhAI karaze, caMdubhAI zuM kare che, te ApaNe 'joyA" karavAnuM. DiscArja eTale je mAla bharyo che te ja nIkaLe, galana thAya che. eTale atyAranuM jJAna ema kahe che Dakho nathI karavo. pahelAnAM AdhAre Dakho thaI jAya che athavA enA pakSamAM paDI javAya che. e benI vacce gharSaNa cAlyA kare che. e cAlyA ja kare ! paNa Dakho nathI karavo, e to Aje ApaNuM jJAna kahe che. paNa te to AtmAno bhAga che ane Dakho thaI jAya che te caMdubhAI ja kare che. praznakartA H eTale ApaNe emAM evuM khaMkherI nAkhavAnuM ke ApaNe emAM kaMI levAdevA nathI. dAdAzrI : levAdevA nathI ane ApaNe enA jJAtA-draSTA rahevAnuM. vadhAre paDatuM kaMIka koIne mUMjhavaNa kare ne koIne duHkha thaI jAya to ApaNe kahevuM, 'tame zA sAru Ama karo cho vagara kAmanA ? te have keTalA dahADA baMdhAvuM che ?" Amatema jarA kahI chUTavuM. te ya cIDAvuM nahIM enI joDe. enI joDe cIDAyA to zo artha ? prakRti, jema pampa mArI mArIne cetana bhareluM. emAM zuM khoLo cho ? ane thaI jAya to ene vaDhavAthI zuM vaLe ? praznakartA : te A je mahIMthI rahyA kare che e Dakho nathI karavo. atyAranuM jJAna evuM batAve ane.... dAdAzrI : e nathI karavo e AjanuM jJAna kahe che. jJAna eTale AtmA. A je prApta thayelo AtmA. Dakho nathI karavo e jJAna che. Dakho thaI jAya che e prakRti, e ajJAna che. je Dakho thAya che ane AtmA 'jue che, basa. jJAtA-draSTA bhAvamAM AvI gayo che. e bhUla thayelI jANene to e AtmA. potAnI bhUlane jue ane jANe, enuM nAma AtmA. Dakho thaI gayo e bhUla, ane tame juo eTale e bhula nIkaLIne cAlI gaI. bhUla 'joyA' sivAya, 'jANyA' sivAya e jAya nahIM. pakaDAvI joIe. 'dIThA nahIM nijadoSa to tarike koNa upAya ?" tane to doSa dekhAya che ne badhA ? praznakartA : dekhAya che. dAdAzrI : badhAya dekhAya che ne ? ene ja vijJAna kahyuM. koI vijJAna evuM nathI ke potAnA doSa dekhADe. praznakartA: hA. e to sUkSmamAM sUkSma doSa dekhADe che. dAdAzrI : sUkSmamAM sUkSma, nAnAmAM nAno. mahIM pratikramaNa hau cAlu karAve ! IphekTa mAtra zeya ! praznakartA : Ape peluM kahyuM ne ke game te thAya to "joyA' karavuM, dAkhalA tarIke koI mANasa ApaNane TAMkaNI mAre to sAmAnya rIte to sAmo ene lApho mAravAnuM ja mana thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : tamAre te "jovuM'. sAmo ene lApho mAre to ApaNe 'joyA" karavuM ane nA mAre to teya 'jovuM'. praznakartA : pachI pastAvo thAya enuM zuM ? dAdAzrI : teya barobara che. teya ApaNe 'jovuM" ke pastAvo thayo ane pastAvo nA thayo ne manamAM ema thAya ke pharI mArIza, teya "jovuM' ApaNe. paNa pharI mArIza kahe, to kahIe, 'kema avaLuM cAlyA, pratikramaNa

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192 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) caMdu' zuM kare che, "joyA' karo ! 191 karo'. bAkI, e badhI iphekTa che. iphekTa badalAya nahIM. iphekTa to 'joyA' ja karavAnI hoya. ane jyAM sudhI jJAna nA maLyuM hoya tyAM sudhI ahaMkAra kartA hoya, tyAM sudhI badhuM badalAya. praznakartA : A mAre nA karavuM, A mAre Ama karavuM e badhA nizcaya, badhA ahaMkAranA levala upara che ? dAdAzrI : A to caMdubhAI kare ane tamAre 'jovuM'. tame 'jonAra' cho. caMdubhAI zuM kare che e "joyA' karavAnuM. caMdubhAI TIopIesa che. hA, bhamaraDo che, te "joyA' karavAnuM. bhamaraDo caDhe-utare. ane ajJAnI ajJAna dazAmAM ye TIpIesa che, bhamaraDAM che. paNa ahaMkAra che eTale UMdhuM-chatuM karyA vagara rahe nahIM. UMdhuM-chatuM karyA kare, kartApada kharuMne ! e kartApada tamAre to UDI gayeluM ! ahaMkAra ne mamatA beu gayeluM. zuM thAya che tene "juo' ! praznakartA: A jJAnathI potAne je AnaMda utpanna thAya che, pachI ethI AgaLa ema thAya ke ApaNe koIne A bAju vALIe ke jethI karIne ene lAbha thAya. to e karavuM joIe ke nA karavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : e to zuM thAya che e jovuM joIe. nA karavAno ya savAla nathI ane karavAno ya savAla nathI. zuM thAya che e 'jova' joIe. kAraNa ke eno karmano udaya ane ApaNA karmano udaya bheguM thayA ja karavAnuM badhuM. emAM karavApaNuM rahetuM ja nathI ne ! ApaNe 'joyA' karavAnuM zuM thAya che e. evuM che ne jovuM-jANavuM kone kahevAya ? tyAre kahe che, A jagatane joIe-jANIe tene ? tyAre kahe, nA. e to badhAya jue che ne jANe che. paNa badhA jue che te jANe che enuM e ja jagata ApaNe jovAnuM che. ane bIjuM vizeSa jagata ApaNe jANavAnuM che ke mananA paryAya joI zakatA nA hoya pote, e ApaNA mananA paryAyane, buddhinA paryAyane badhA joI zakIe. paNa A jovuM-jANavuM e kaMI lokonA ekalAne mATe nathI, e tamArA mATe paNa A jovA-jANavAnuM che. lokonuM jovuM-jANavuM rAga-dveSa sahita che ane A tamAruM jovA-jANavAnuM rAga-dveSa rahita che, basa. sinemAmAM koI koIne mArI nAkhato hoya, to tamane tyAM mAranArA upara dveSa nA Avavo joIe. ane pahelAM to muzkelI UbhI thAya. game ke nA ya game, beu rahe ene, rAga-dveSa banne rahe. keTalAMkane nA ya gamatuM hoya ne keTalAMkane gamatuM hoya paNa tamAre gamo-aNagamo nA rahe. tamAre jJAtA-draSTA ja rahevuM joIe, jyAM jaIe tyAM. eTale pyaoNra 'jovuM" ane pyaoNra 'jANavuM'. ane A jALavavA jatAM A dAdAe Apelo AtmA jato raheto nathI. AtmA darekamAM hAjara ja hoya che tamane. A badhuM nA hoya to tame juo zuM ? ApaNe thiyeTaramAM peThA pachI "dhI enDa' lakheluM hoya emAM zuM juo tame ? tame muzkelImAM mUkAo. tyAre jovAnI vastu nathI to "jonAra' kyAM ? 'jonAra' ebsanTa ! jovAnI vastu hoya to 'jonAra' hAjara thAya. eTale A badhI philama che to AtmA hAjara rahe. philama ja nA "jovAnI' hoya to ebsanTa thaI jaze. paNa e abhyAsa nathI, teno ApaNe abhyAsa rAkhavo joIe. pachI je kAma karavuM hoya te karo ne ! badhuM "juo ke caMdubhAI zuM karI rahyA che A. e caMdubhAIne 'joyA karo, phAIla naMbara vanane.

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pudgalane zuddha karo ! 193 [23] pudgalane zuddha re ! jotA raho aMdaranA kacarAte ! pudgala eTale ApaNuM makAna, meM A rItano dAkhalo Apyo ke makAna te dhoLyuM-kayuM, raMgarogAna karyuM, mATe thaI gayuM e zuddha. e rIte A dAdAe tamane samajaNa pADI ke tame zuddhAtmA cho. eTale tArI zraddhA pharI. mATe zuddha thayo e vAta cokkasa. paNa have aMdaranuM badhuM cokhkhuM karavAnuM bAkI che te ?! eTale have tuM che te aMdarano A badho kacaro kADhI nAkha. kacaro haju dekhAya che ne ke nathI dekhAto ? tyAre kahe, 'hA, kacaro paDyo che eTale kacaro kADhI nAkhe, eTale have bIjuM zuM che ? e kahe che ke "huM zuddha chuM'. roja aMgUThA AgaLa bole che 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM', paNa haju thaI gayA nathI. tyAre kahe, 'zuM bAkI che haju emane ?" tyAre kahe, 'A pharnicara nIce badhuM bAvAM coTelAM che.' e badhAM sApha karI nAkhyAM. tyAra pachI, 'have huM zuddha chuM'. tyAre kahe, "nA, haju A vAsaNo chene, te hatAM e je sAphasUpha karI nAkhIe to ja sApha kahevAya, zuddha kahevAya.' to e karI nAkhyA. tyAra pachI ApaNe kahIe, 'vAsaNomAM to haju e mahIM mATI coMTelI che." badhuM thaI jAya tyAra pachI zuddhAtmA tame thaI gayA. eTale e huM AtmA ane A zuddha pudgala thaI gayA. eTale tame cokhkhA thaI gayA ne ameya cokhkhA, to ApaNe chUTAM. eTale mAre tamane kahevAnuM nahIM have AnuM. 194 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : barAbara che. eTale aMdaranuM amAre ja dhyAna rAkhavAnuM. dAdAzrI : tamAre jotAM rahevAnuM ke A kharekhara zuddha keTaluM thayuM ne keTaluM bAkI che ! praznakartA : have jhINavaTapUrvaka badho kacaro kADhI nAkhavAno che. dAdAzrI : jhINavaTathI kacarA nahatA kADhatAM, atyAra sudhI ? praznakartA : nA, nahIM kADhyo hoya. dAdAzrI : 'nahIM kADhyo hoya' kahe che, kADhyo ja nathI. mArI pAse ekuMya zabda tolyA vagara nahIM rahe. kAMTo judI jAtano che ! te kacaro tamAre kADhavAno ke mAre kADhavAno ? praznakartA : tamArI kRpAthI ame kADhI nAkhIe. dAdAzrI : paNa AvuM jotAM ja rahevAnuM badhuMya. jhINavaTathI badhuM joyA pachI mane kaho ke, huM zuddha thayo have. jo A bahArathI raMgarogAnathI ATaluM sukha paDyuM, to bIjuM jema jema aMdaranuM zuddha karo tema zuM thAya ? praznakartA : vadhAre sukha thAya. dAdAzrI : pUrepUruM sukha. paramAnaMda sthiti ! samAdhimAM rahI zake. eTale A badhuM jojo have jhINavaTathI. mane besADene to AkhuM rAmAyaNa thAya evuM che ! AkhI copaDI thAya. A TUMkamAM pAMca miniTamAM tamane samajAvI dIdhuM. praznakartA : hajI AvI jhINI draSTi maLe ke nA maLe ? dAdAzrI : A hamaNe bolyA eTale thavAnI ja jhINI draSTi. paNa tame koI dahADo ema nathI kahyuM ke bhaI, amAre have kazuM karavAnuM nahIM, amAre to thaI gayuM, kaheze. A to kahetA hatA ke, huM cokhkho thaI gayo chuM ane have kahe che,

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pudgalane zuddha karo ! nA, cokhkho nathI thayo. have cokhkhuM karavuM che. pahelAM kevA thaI gayA hatA ? bahAra dekhAvamAM cokhkhA paNa aMdara kacarAvALA. 195 A to pote bhagavAna thavAnuM che. ahIM bhagavAnanA dAsa thavAnuM nathI. atyAre dAsAnudAsa lakho cho paNa chevaTe cokhkhuM karatAM karatAM bhagavAna thAva. e tamArI mahIM anaMta zakti che. joyA karo jAtatI bhUlo sadA ! praznakartA : dAdA, tame kharekhara jAgRta karI dIdhA. dAdAzrI : hA. e jAgRta thayA, paNa A lakhI lejo badhuM ane roja vAMcavAmAM rAkhajo. haju vAsaNo rahI gayAM, phalANuM rahI gayuM. praznakartA : jhINavaTapUrvaka joIzuM. dAdAzrI : hA, te ApaNe sApha nahIM karavAnuM. ApaNe to orDara karavAno che. caMdubhAI peluM rahI gayuM, have peluM karo. e caMdubhAI, peluM rahI gayuM karo. A makAna bahArathI ekaluM dhoLAvI do to cAle nahIM. eTale tamAre kahevAnuM. tamAre caMdubhAIne orDara karavAno ke A kaI jAtanuM ? bahA2 dhoLAvyuM, raMgarogAna karyo mATe kaMI thaI gayuM ? haju to A pUMjo-bhUMjo kADhI nAkhone ! 'e ya caMdubhAI, zuM karo cho ? kahIe have. eTale AvI rIte tamAre caMdubhAI pAse karAvavuM. eTale jema jema kahetAM jaIzuM ne jeTaluM cokhkhuM thayuM, ema tame paNa cokhkhA thatAM gayA. huM kahuM e sAyansamAM bhUla nathIne ? praznakartA : jarAya nahIM, dAdA. dAdAzrI : pharnicara cokhkhuM thaI jAya. vAsaNoye gaMdhAtAM e cokhkhA thAya. badhuM jotAM jotAM jaIene tyAre khabara paDe pachI. paNa to pharnicara cokhkhuM thaI gayuM eTale pachI jaIne sUI gayo. kaheze, 'have ArAma karuM'. emAM bhalIvAra na Ave. eTale ame ghaNuM samajAvIe, paNa samaje nahIMne ! AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) Akho dahADo jIva ja emAM rAkhavAno phakta ke ApaNe caMdubhAI zuM kare che ? caMdubhAIne ApaNe kahyA karIe, tene caMdubhAI zuM kare che, e 'jovuM' ne e nA kare to ApaNe kahevuM, 'haju A vAsaNo rahI gayA. haju A phalANuM rahI gayuM.' eka pUruM kare eTale pachI tarata bIjuM dekhADavuM. 196 eTale e caMdubhAInI bhUlo tamane dekhAya ane tamAre caMdubhAIne A bhUlo karo cho, paNa have sudhArI lo' eTale to enuM sIdhuM thaze, nahIM to sIdhuM thAya nahIM. kahevuM ke kyAM sudhI dekhAyA kare dAdA ? praznakartA : have e kacaro eTale kayo kacaro ? dAdAzrI : badhAMno ja kacaro. badho kacaro ja paDelo che. je ApaNane mULa vastu para 'huM AtmA chuM' e upayoga nathI rAkhavA detuM e kacaro ja che badho. eTale e kacaro vALazo eTale upayoga raheze. huM zuM kahevA mAMguM chuM, thoDuM samajAyuM ? praznakartA : je zuddha upayoga nathI rahevA detuM. e badhI ja vastuo kacaro. dAdAzrI : hA. eTale kyAM sudhI huM dekhADa dekhADa karuM, have tamAre jovAnuM rahyuM. vAsaNo soDe(durgaMdhavALA)ne, te ubAhavALA(phUga caDhelA) soDe che. e soDe, evA vAsaNamAM khavAya ? e zuddha tyAM sudhI karavAnuM. eTale eka phero pUruM zuddha karI nAkho. kyAM sudhI huM tamane kahe kahe karuM te ? bhADe rAkhelo hoya te TheTha sudhI kAma kare, paNa huM kaMI bhADe rAkhelo chuM ? praznakartA H nahIM, dAdA. ame lakhI lIdhuM ke gharamAMthI jhINavaTapUrvaka badho kacaro kADhI nAkhavAno che. dAdAzrI : A jhINI vAtamAM tamAruM magaja pahoMce nahIM, evI vAta samajo chone ? jANo chone AvI jhINI vAtomAM ? e jJAnInuM kAma chene ! eTale e lakhI levA jevuM. pachI tamAruM kAma karaze badhuM ! bhUlAya nahIM ema kahyuM hatuM. lakhI lIdhuM hoya to pachI roja vAMcIe ne to jAgRti rahe ke have

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pudgalane zuddha karo ! 197 zuM zuM rahyuM ? tapAsa karo ApaNe. tapAsa karIe to jaDe pAchuM. mahIMthI, bhagavAne kahyuM ke kahI do badhAne. pachI javAbadArI kyAM sudhI rAkhazo ? huM kaMI dekhADavA nahIM AvuM. tamAre ja dekhADavAnuM. have pharI kahevuM nahIM paDene mAre ? have mAre kahevA AvavuM nA paDe. tamAre ja kahevAnuM, 'caMdubhAI Ama kara, Ama kara." A kacaro tamane regyulara rahevA nA de. eTale gharamAM kacaro che eTale 'ApaNe' 'ene' kahI devAnuM ke 'caMdubhAI, jo kacaro che haju.' tyAre caMdubhAI kaheze, tame zuddha thaye mane zuM phAyado? to kahe, 'ame zuddha thaIe to tAruM ThekANuM paDI ja jaze e cokkasa, enI geranTI.' praznakartA : zuddha to ApaNe caMdubhAIne ja karavAno che ! dAdAzrI : haMa. "ApaNe" to zuddha chIe ja. ApaNe zuddhAtmA chIe ja. have caMdubhAI zuM kahe che ke, huM ya zuddha thaI gayo chuM. tyAre kahe, "nA, haju to bahArathI badhuM dhovAI gayuM che, paNa haju to mahIM che te badho kacaro paDyo che. ene vALI nAkho to zuddha thaI jazo !' vAsaNo ghasI nAkhyAM. jema tema e to ghasyA eTale pachI jarA mATI koI koI dekhAya. 'e to bhInA che" kaheze. 'ghasI kADho. vadhAre ghasI nAkho." ame tamane chUTa ApI. khAjo bA. hA, AmAMthI hAMDavo khAvo hoya to hAMDavo khAjo ane jalebIya khAjo. e samajAyuM huM zuM kahevA mAMguM te ? eTale have pUMjo vALavAno. ene peluM eka pUruM thayuM eTale bIjuM dekhADavAnuM ane ApaNe juduM jeTaluM 'joIe' ke A ANe garvarasa cAkhyo eTale pudgala chUTuM paDI jAya. nahIM to chUTA nA thavAya. eTale 'joyuM' eTale ApaNe chUTAM ane pudgala chUTuM paDI jAya. jeNe bagADyuM teNe karavuM cokhkhuM ! jJAnI puruSe zraddhA toDI ApI tamArI ke "caMdubhAI chuM'. e badhuM ya AkhuM toDI nAkhyuM ! "huM caMdubhAI chuM', 'huM Ano bhAI thauM, Ano kAko thauM, Ano mAmo thauM, Ano dhaNI thauM... keTaluM badhuM toDI nAkhyuM 198 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) cogaradamathI ! have huM zuddhAtmA chuM tyAM sudhI AvyA. ne have aMdara cokhkhuM karatAM karatAM javAnuM che. tyAre bagADa koNe karyo ? tyAre kahe, pahelAM ApaNe ja karelo, bagADa. ane bahu varasa paDI rahe eTale pachI e vAsaNo kATa ja khAyane ? mahIM have cokhkhuM karavAnuM. khAvuM-pIvuM-sUvuM, satsaMgamAM besavuM, paNa niraMtara cokhkhuM karavA para ApaNuM citta rahevuM joIe. cokhkhuM karavA mAMDyuM, enuM nAma upayoga. rUma badhAM cokhkhA karavA mAMDyA ? praznakartA: hA, cokhkhA karavA mAMDyA. jALAM-bALAM badhAM bahu che. have dekhAya che ke jALAM kyAM che ema. aMdara khUNe-khAMcare bharAI gayelAM badhAM, have dekhAya che. dAdAzrI : e dekhanArA tame cho ane sApha karanArAM pelAM che, gharamAlika. sApha karI rahe eTale pAchAM e kahe ke 'have huM ArAma karuM?" tyAre kahe, "nA, haju to A bAkI che. badhuM pUruM thAya pachI ArAma karajo.' praznakartA : hA, rAITa. upayoga cUAve e kacaro ! praznakartA : kacaro eTale e mana-vacana-kAyA-citta-buddhi-ahaMkAra dAdAzrI : e ahaMkAra-mana-vacana-kAyA badhuMya che te ekanuM eka ja che. hA. eka ja vastuno banelo che. paNa emAM thoDuM milcara ApaNuM, pAvara pesI gayo che AtmAno. phakta pAvara ekalo ja. jema sela eka ja vastuno banelo che, emAM bahArano pAvara pesI gayo che, eTale lAITa Ape che. pAvara nIkaLI jAya eTale kazuM che nahIM. ekanuM eka ja che. eTale e to badhA kaSAyo bharelAM che te nIkaLyA ja kare, mahIM bharelA che eTalA. ane tamAre ene joyA karIne pachI caMdubhAIne kahIe, 'pratikramaNa karo, pharI caraNavidhi bolo" eTaluM ja, bIjuM kaMI nahIM. tamAre 'joIne' nikAla karavAno. enuM nAma sApha karyuM kahevAya. gharamAM ApaNe jaIe to pelA kaheze, "sAheba, have badhuM thaI gayuM. have Ano karAra

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pudgalane zuddha karo ! 199 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) doSo dekhAya e upayoga ! praznakartA : upayogamAM kacaro nIkaLe kharo ? e paNa upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : upayoga e kahevAya ke badho kacaro nIkaLyA ja kare. tame tyAMthI AvavA nIkaLo te paccIsaso mAIlono kacaro. ane pAMcaso mAIla AvyA eTale kaheze, 'bhaI pAMcaso mAIlano e kacaro nIkaLI gayo'. e pAMcaso mAIlano upayoga. ema karatAM karatAM pelo kacaro paccIsaso mAIlano jato rahe eTale mukta ! sIdhI sAdI vAta chene ? je kacaro nIkaLI gayo pachI pAcho te kacaro kADhavAno nathI, upayogamAM rahevAnuM che. karo'. tyAre kahe, "nA, haju to A bAkI che'. e karyA kare ne ApaNe dekhADyA karIe ! jo upayogamAM rahe pachI kazuM rahetuM ja nathI. pachI kazuM kacaro vALavAnuM ja nathI rahetuM. enuM nAma ja sApha karyuM kahevAya. sApha thaI gayeluM hoya to upayogamAM rahevAya ane nA hoya to jarIka upayoga khacakAya. thoDIkavAra rahe, thoDIkavAra nA rahe. praznakartA : to e paNa Ape kIdhuM che ke garvarasa cAkhyo, paNa e joyo ke ANe garvarasa cAkhyo. eTale e chUTuM paDI gayuM kahevAyane ? dAdAzrI : cAkhanAra te 'huM hoya' evuM hovuM joIe. A cAkhe che te 'huM hoya' ane 'meM cAkhyo' evuM kahe to pachI pote ja thaI gayo. teno garvarasa cAkhe paNa enA manamAM ema ke A huM ja chuM. have ApaNuM jJAna zuM kahe che ? e "A huM hoya' eTaluM ja kahe. e samajIne tyAM chUTuM rahevAnuM. ane samabhAve nikAla karavAno. 'huM A hoya' karIne samabhAve nikAla karavAno. praznakartA : mULa upayogamAM koI paNa vastu rahevA nA de, e badho ja kacaro. dAdAzrI : hA. upayogamAM rahevA nA de e kacaro. rahevA de e kacaro khalAsa thaI gayo che. ApaNe to sApha karavAnuM nA hoya, ApaNe to 'jovAnuM' ! agara je Ave te 'mAruM svarUpa nahIM' kahyuM eTale chUTA. duHkha Ave, sukha Ave, krodha Ave, bIjuM Ave toya paNa je Ave te mAruM svarUpa hoya' evI jAgRti rahevI joIe. praznakartA to e lepAyamAna bhAvo e ja badho pUMjo ne kacarone ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM ? lepe e lepAyamAna bhAvo. ane e nirlepa rAkhe e A upayoga. A to be-traNa miniTa rahe. evo upayoga kAyama rahe nahIMne ?!

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202 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) [3] zuddha upayoga upayoganI samaja ! praznakartA: 'upayoga' zabda bahu vakhatathI samajAto nahoto. dAdAzrI : upayoga eTale zuM ? AkhA dahADAmAM corane corI karavAmAM ja upayoga hoya. cora hoyane, gajavuM kApanAra, teno upayoga che te paisA keTalA vadhyA ke ghaTyA emAM nA hoya, tyAM gajavuM kApavAmAM ja upayoga hoya. eTale AtmA(vyavahAra AtmA) jemAM vaparAya te upayoga. eTale 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' rahe che, evuM kahyuM to zuddha upayoga. | upayoga to jAgRti kahevAya. upayoga to, atyAre A gaNapatidAdAnA meLAmAM gayA chene, te atyAre eno upayoga zemAM hoya ? tyAre kahe che, "nA, paisAmAM nathI. viSayomAM nathI.' zAmAM upayoga haze ? A saMsAranI dharmadhyAnanI zraddhAmAM che." eya eka zraddhA che. eTale zubha upayogamAM che. have saMsAra jemAM nathI e zraddhA badhI sAcI ja che. paNa samyak nathI. samyak to, jyAre avinAzI utpanna thAya, tyAre samyak thAya. jo upayoga samaje to kAma thaI jAya. AtmAno vyavahAramAM zuM che ? tyAre kahe, upayoga. cAra prakAranA upayoga. azuddha upayoga, azubha upayoga ane zubha upayoga - A traNe prakRti ane parANe karAvaDAve che. karAve bIjo ne pote mAne che 'meM kahyuM ne pote baMdhAya che, ahaMkAra karIne. cothA prakArano upayoga e zuddha upayoga che ane te svataMtra che. ApaNe have zuddha upayogI kahevAIe. atyAra sudhI zubhAzubha upayogI hatA. sAruM karavuM e badhuM zubha kahevAya ne khoTuM karavuM e azubha kahevAya. vrata, tapa-japa badhuM karavuM, zAstra adhyayana karavAM te badhuM zubha upayoga kahevAya ane bIjuM badhuM azubha kahevAya. praznakartA : zuddha upayoga ne zubha upayoga samajAvo. dAdAzrI : zubha upayoga kyAM sudhI ke 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' evuM hoya tyAM sudhI zubha ane azubha banneya upayoga hoya. kAraNa ke zubha hoya tyAM azubha hoya ja ane 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' tyAM zuddha upayoga. zuddha upayoga eTale zuM ? jyAM viSayasaMbaMdhI ane kaSAyasaMbaMdhIno vicAra nahIM, viSaya ane krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha eno sparza nA hoya evo upayoga. vyavahAranuM kAma choDI devAnuM nathI. kAma chUTe to choDI do. nA chUTe to rahevA do. Dabala kAma Ave to Dabala karo. paNa rAga-dveSa kADhavAnA che. jemAM rAga-dveSano chAMTo hoya, e tamAro mAla hoya. ane amAruM jJAna ApIe chIe pachI rAga-dveSa nahIM rahe, tame Dakho nahIM karo to. e jJAna ja kAma evuM kare che. chatAMya kaMI saMsArI kAma hoya to upayoga jAya, saMsAramAM upayoga to devo paDene ! keTalIka vakhata, saMsAramAM upayoga sivAya kArya thAya nahIM. keTalAMka kAma to upayoga vagara thAya evA che. keTalAMkamAM upayoga devo paDe. have upayoga eTale zuM ? tyAre kahe, 'zemAM tame ramaNatA karI rahyA cho atyAre ?" tyAre kahe, "atyAre to mane korTano kesa yAda Avyo to e vicAra karato hato." e upayoga. te vakhate ahIM nA hoya. A to akrama che eTale ahIMyA cho ne tyAMya cho, beya che. paNa e eTaluM sAcavatAM AvaDe nahIM. nahIM to beThAM beThAM joyA karo, caMdubhAI zuM kare che, to e upayoga rahyo kahevAya. paNa eTalI badhI zakti nA hoyane ! eTale upayoga jeTalo jAya e amane khabara paDI jAya ke A upayoga bIjI jagyAe gayo che. kaI kaI jagyAe jAya, te khabara paDe tamane ?

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zuddha upayoga 203 204 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA: hA paDe che, dAdA. dAdAzrI : upayogano artha ja e ke zAmAM varto cho ? e zuddha upayogamAM nA rahe tyAre sadupayogamAM rahe che. te kyAM kyAM varte che e joI levAnuM. sadupayoga eTale saMsArI cIjomAM varte. gharanA mANaso kahe ke ATalA dAgInA banAvaDAvone, A dAgInA karone, peluM lAvone ! e badhAMnuM samAdhAna thAya, phAIlano nikAla karavA dhyAna to devuM ja paDene ! paNa emAM ekAgra nA thavuM, baLyuM !! ekAgra thayA e upayoga cUkyA. praznakartA eTale zuddha ane zubha beu sAthe cAlI zakene ? AtmA zuddhamAM ne mana-vacana-kAyA zubhamAM evuM sAthe hoyane ? dAdAzrI : e to zubhamAMya hoya ane koI phero azubhamAMya hoya. A mana-vacana-kAyA dAna karatAM hoya ne ene A jonAra hoya. e vAMdho nathI. e pote zuddha ja che. kAraNa ke dAna e pariNAma che, corI karavI ke dAna ApavuM e banneya pariNAma che ane A zuddha upayoga e upayoga che. upayogano artha zAstramAM AvI rIte phoDavAra samajAvI zake nahIM koI ane ame tamane samajaNa pADIe chIe ke tamane samajAI jAya A upayoga. tamane samajAya to upayoga rahe. upayoga e koto guNa ? AtmA AtmAnAM svabhAvamAM ja rahe che. e svabhAva badalAto nathI. ajJAthI jagata UbhuM thayuM che ane pelI prajJAthI mokSa thAya. ajJAthI eTale buddhithI, prajJAthI eTale jJAnathI. eTale ajJA che te saMsAranI bahAra nIkaLavA nA de. prajJA saMsAramAM TakavA nA de, mokSamAM laI jAya eTale cetavaNI badhI prajJAnI che, cetave-kare te badhuM. praznakartA : upayoga e kono guNa che ? dAdAzrI : have e zuddha upayoga prajJAno che ane zubhAzubha upayoga ahaMkArano che. ane te parAdhIna che, svAdhIna nathI. ane A prajJAno che ne svAdhIna che. A puruSArthamaya che, peluM karmAdhIna che. praznakartA : dAdA, upayoga e AtmAnuM lakSaNa gaNAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. A upayoga, eno yoga zemAM che ? svAbhAvika yogamAM che ke vizeSa bhAvanAM yogamAM che ? te vizeSabhAvanAM yoga eya paNa upayoga kahevAya. upayoga eTale jAgRtipUrvaka. praznakartA : jAgRtinA saMdarbhamAM upayoga kone kahevo ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti A saMsAra bAju vAparavI te durupayoga kahevAya ne A bAju, ApaNe AtmAbhaNI, dharmabhaNI vAparIe to sadupayoga kahevAya, zubha upayoga kahevAya. ane AtmajAgRtimAM AvyA pachI zuddha upayoga kahevAya. praznakartA : upayoga mULa AtmAno hoya chene ? dAdAzrI : nA, AtmAno upayoga nA hoya. AtmAne upayoga hoya to pachI thaI gayo bhaMDArI, sarvisamena thaI gayo. ahIM to ApaNA loko zIkhavADe, paNa AtmA tevo nathI. A bahAra je pracalita vAkyo che temAM eka paNa jagyAe AtmA nathI. A tamAre mAnI levuM. e sahu sahunA sTAnDarDa pramANe sahu koI bole che paNa sTAnDarDAijha che. AtmAne upayogeya nathI ne kazuMya nathI. praznakartA: to A upayoga kono che e hajI nathI samajAtuM. dAdAzrI : upayoga badho ahaMkArIno. AtmA prApta karyA pachI AtmAnI draSTi thayA pachI eno AtmA bAju upayoga jAya che e svaupayoga kahevAya che ane A bIjI bAju jAya to paraupayoga kahevAya che basa. upayoga eTale jAgRti kaI bAju vAparI te ja jovAnuM. AtmA upayoga svarUpa nathI. phera, upayoga ane jAgRtimAM ! praznakartA: AtmAno upayoga ane AtmAnI jAgRti e be vacce zuM Dipharansa ?

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zuddha upayoga 205 206 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : Dipharansa to A lAITa saLagyA karatI hoya, ApaNe kazuM kAma na karIe ane UMdhyA karIe, to lAITa nakAmI jAyane ? ane A lAITano prakAza hoya e jAgRti ja che, paNa vAMcIe to upayoga karyo kahevAya. praznakartA : eTale jAgRtine eka jagyA nakkI karavI, enuM nAma upayoga ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti to hoya ja, jJAna ApIe eTale. enuM kAma karI levuM. jAgRti to vahI jAya ema ne ema, upayoga karIe to kAma lAge. ilekTrisiTI che ja nahIM, enuM nAma jAgRti, paNa baTana dabAvIe to ajavALuM thAyane ! A baTana dabAvIe te upayoga, nahIM to garamImAM Ama Ama hAthe karIne paMkhA pherave. alyA, baTana dabAyane ! upayoga karane ! yathArtha zuddha upayoga ! zuddha upayoga eTale zuM ke potAnI jAtane zuddha jANI ane tuM zuddha jo. potAnI jAtane "huM zuddha chuM' evI pratIti, lakSa ne anubhavathI jo ane bIjAnAmAM te rUpe jo, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. have vakhate koI mANasa AvaDo moTo phUlono hAra caDAvI gayo, eTale te ghaDIe ApaNane enA tarapha bhAva Avyo ke bahu sAro mANasa hato. ane pachI eka mANase e hAra toDI nAkhyo ne pheMkI dIdho, ApaNI pAsethI laIne. to enA para abhAva thAya te zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. eka paherAve, eka toDI nAkhe. eka mAna Ape, eka gALo bhAMDe paNa enAmAM pheraphAra nA hoya. e pheraphAra thAya che tyAM sudhI e haju zuddha upayoga thayo nathI, jeTalo joIe evo. praznakartA : pheraphAra thAya ja che, dAdA. asara thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : e pheraphAra thAya eTale jANavuM ke eTalo kacaro che haju. zuddha upayoga eTale AtmA bhUlAya nahIM. eTale jeTalo vakhata rAga-dveSa nA thAya, e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. praznakartA : ahIMyAM satsaMgamAM beThA hoIe ane badhAmAM ApaNe zuddhAtmA joIe e zuddha upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, te badhAmAM zuddhAtmA joIe paNa ko'ka AvIne dhola mAre ane enAmAM zuddhAtmA nA dekhAya to ApaNe jANavuM ke hoya zuddha upayoga. polIsavALo jelamAM laI jato hoya, te ghaDIe polIsavALAmAM zuddha ja dekhAya AtmA tyAre kharuM ! bairI gALo bhAMDatI hoya, te ghaDIe bairImAM AtmA zuddha dekhAya tyAre sAcuM. evo AtmA Apyo che. tamAre jANavAnI jarUra. meM AtmA Apyo che kevo ? nIvaLa zuddha AtmA Apyo che. kyAreya paNa pAcho hato evo nA thaI jAya. eTale tamArI taiyArI joIze. pote zuddhAtmA to thayA eTale pote 'zuddha ja chuM' evuM mAnavAnuM. vakhate caMdubhAImAM che te karmano udaya koI evo hoya pUrvano, je saMsAranA lokone dhRNA utpanna thAya evo hoya. toya tamAre tamAruM zuddhatva je che, enAmAM pheraphAra nA thavo joIe. meM tamane zuddha svarUpa ApeluM che. pachI udayakarma jo game te bharelAM hoya, te nIkaLyA kare. potAnAthI kharAba kAma thaI gayuM to potAnI jAtane huM bagaDI gayo chuM ke azuddha thaI gayo evuM thAya, e zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. game tevuM kAma potAnAthI thaI gayuM che, paNa have e to tAruM nathI kAma, A tuM judo paDyo ne e kAma karanAro judo. tuM azuddha nathI thayo. je azuddha che te ja azuddha thayuM che, sAthe evI jAgRti rahevI joIe. have pachI bIjo tamane gALo bhAMDe che evuM tame mane phariyAda karo to huM jANuM ke tame zuddha upayogamAM rahyA nathI. ene zuddha ja juo. eya zuddha ja che ane A je Dakhala che e pudgalanI kustI che. kustI koNa kare che? A pudgala ane mAthe le che pote. ane pachI kaheze ke A bhAIe mAruM apamAna karyuM. eTale huM kahuM ke tAro zuddha upayoga nakAmo gayo. zuddha upayoga kyAre gaNavAmAM Ave che ke badhAnAmAM zuddha ja che ema jovAmAM Ave. mahAvIra bhagavAnane covIseya kalAka je zuddha upayoga raheto'to. te tamane pAMca miniTa, dasa miniTa, paMdara miniTa thAya to bahu sAruM.

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zuddha upayoga bhagavAna zuM karatAM'tAM ? DhekhALo mAre tene zuddha jotA'tA, dhola mAre tene zuddha jotA'tA, upara kAdava nAkhatA'tA tene zuddha jotA'tA, mAratA'tA tene zuddha jotA'tA. A vItarAga vijJAna covIsa tIrthaMkaronuM, zuddha upayoganuM jJAna che ! ahIM saMsAramAM haratAM-pharatAM mokSa Ape evuM che ! phera zuddha upayoga te jJAtA-draSTAmAM ! praznakartA : zuddha upayoga, jovuM ne jANavuM ane jJAtA-draSTA e traNamAM zuM phera ? 207 dAdAzrI : e traNeva eka ja che badhuM. paNa zuddha upayoga lAMbo pahoLo hoya. zuddha upayoga eTale tame koIne kaho ke teM mane kema gALa dIdhI ? te e zuddha upayoga tamAro nhoya. ane tamArA lakSamAM agara dhyAnamAM hoya ke 'nagInabhAIe caMdubhAIne gALa dIdhI' evuM tane rahe to e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. 'A nagInabhAIe mane dIdhI' ema kahe to e zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. koI doSita nA dekhAya, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. doSita che nahIM. jagata nirdoSa ja che. praznakartA : have A je banyuM e vakhate jovuM-jANavuM eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : rAga-dveSa nahIM karavA eTale jovuM-jANavuM kahevAya. praznakartA H eTale upayoga karatAM jovuM-jANavuM eka sTepa AgaLa che ? dAdAzrI : nA. sahuthI sArAmAM sArI vAta zuddha upayoganI. zuddha upayoga, e chellAmAM chelluM sTezana ane tenuM phaLa jovuM-jANavuM e che. zuddha jue-jANe che, tene ja zudgha upayoga kahe che. bIjI badhI bahu rIte zuddha upayoga kahevAya che. sAmo paNa zuddha ja che evuM lAgavuM joIe. tane lAge kharuM evuM ? praznakartA : doSita dekhAya pachI enAM pratikramaNa thaI jAya pAchAM. dAdAzrI : barobara. toya cAle. 208 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) zuddha upayoga kone ? praznakartA : caMdubhAI jyAM sudhI jIve che, tyAM sudhI teno upayoga to vyavahAramAM ja hoya. to pachI Apa je zuddha upayogamAM rahevAnI vAta kaho cho e kevI rIte bane ? dAdAzrI : e to prajJA thakI banavAnuMne ! eTale pote zuddha che ane sAmAnAmAM zuddha che ! prajJA ane ajJA, be pherane ? peluM annA kAma kare ne A prajJA kAma kare, eTalo ja phera ! praznakartA : A caMdubhAI vyavahAramAM che ? dAdAzrI : e badhI ajJA kAma karyA kare. ajJA ane prajJA. ajJA eTale buddhi, prajJA eTale jJAna. prajJA che te 'huM zuddha chuM' evuM jANe che ane bIjAne bIjo gALo de che toya enA AtmAne zuddha che ema jANe che. * zuddha jANavAnuM che. emAM pheraphAra na thavo joIe e zuddha upayoga. zuddha jovuM. gAyo-bheMso badhAmAM AtmA zuddha jovo ke e zuddha AtmA che. gALo bhAMDato hoya, gajavuM kApato hoya toya zuddha AtmA, enI zuddhatAne jovI. praznakartA : to e caMdubhAIno zuddha upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : caMdubhAIno zuddha upayoga hoya ja nahIM, prajJAno zuddha upayoga hoya. caMdubhAIno upayoga e to azuddha upayoga, zubhAzubha upayoga. sAruM jue ne khoTuM jue teya nikAlI bhAga che, grahaNIya nahIM. teya nikAlI eTale nirmULa thavAnuM, bIjuM ugaze nahIM. caMdubhAI zuM kare che e jANe eTale bahu thaI gayuM, e potAno zuddha upayoga. caMdubhAI A bAju jue tene ApaNe jANIe ke oho, caMdubhAI AvuM jue che, to e potAno zuddha upayoga ! vyavahAra te upayoga, banne sAthe ja ! praznakartA H rojiMdA vyavahAranI badhI goThavaNI karatI vakhate zuddha upayogamAM rahI zakAya kharuM ?

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zuddha upayoga 209 210 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : vyavahAra karatAM zuddha upayogamAM rahI zakAya evuM pUche, e zuddha upayogane jANatA nathI kAM to vyavahArane jANato nathI. praznakartA : eno Dipharansa jarA samajAvo. dAdAzrI : dareka vyavahAra, kriyA ane jJAtA beu sAthe ja cAle. beno sAthe ja vyavahAra hoya. praznakartA : e benuM sAthepaNuM hoya ja vyavahAramAM ? dAdAzrI : hoya ja, badhuM sAthe ja che paNa enI ene jAgRti nathI. praznakartA : eTale dAdA, vyavahAra je kare che, kriyA je kare che te ane je jJAtA jue che e banne judA ja che, paNa sAthe ja che. dAdAzrI : vyavahAra e kriyA kahevAya ane A upayoga e jJAna kahevAya. eka bAju juo ne eka bAju kriyA thAya. banne sAthe ja cAle. juduM juduM cAle nahIM koI dahADo. dareka TAImamAM AtmA hAjara hoya ja. AtmA gerahAjara thAya nahIM. kriyA gerahAjara thAya. praznakartA dareka kriyA vakhate jAgRti rAkhavI e mukhya vastu thaIne ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti rAkhavAnI hoya ja nahIM, e hoya ja. A to avaLA DApho mAre eTale pachI UMdhuM thaI jAya. AtmA che te bIje kyAM gayo ? e kriyA karatI vakhate koNa kare che pachI ? ahaMkAra kriyA kare, ene jJAtA jue. barobara kyAM nahotuM ne kyAM barobara thaI gayuM? evI zuM cUka thaI gaI ? e badhuM AtmA jue. enI ene khAtrI thaI jAya pachI. - eka mANasa hoya, AMkho nathI eTale AMdhaLo che. zakti bahu che, ghoDA jevI che ane eka jaNane be paga enA kapAI gayA che, ene AMdhaLAe khabhA upara besADyo hoya, to bannenuM gADuM cAle ke nA cAle ? pelo AMdhaLo kaheze, 'upara besa, bhaI. tuM mane doravaNI Apaje.' tyAre AMdhaLo mahIM kyAre kacakaca karato haze ? aDacaNa Ave tyAre ja bUma pADe. tyAre laMgaDo ene doravaNI kare. dekhato AtmA joyA kare laMgaDo ane AMdhaLo cAlyA kare, evo vyavahAra cAle che, AtmA te ghaDIe jato raheto nathI. jyAM vyavahArane ja AtmA mAnyo che ane ja jJAtA chuM', tyAM AgaLa be bheguM cAlyA kare. peluM juduM nA paDe. 'huM ja jouM chuM ne huM ja karuM chuM', pahelAM evI sthiti hatI ne ? meM sAMbhaLyuM. meM joyuM ane potAne jJAtA-draSTA mAne pAcho. enuM jJAtApaNuM jatuM nA rahe, tema draSTApaNuM jatuM nathI rahetuM. paNa anubhavapUrvaka thavuM joIe. praznakartA : anubhavapUrvaka eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : eka phero joyuM hoya to bIjI vakhata dekhAya. jJAna eTale anubhava. jeTalA anubhava thaI gayA eTalAmAM hoya ja. darzana eTale pratIti. jJAna eTale anubhava. praznakartA A phAIlono nikAla karatI vakhate to upayoga mUkavo paDe, to te vakhate kaI dazA hoya ? dAdAzrI : A phAIlono nikAla karatI vakhate upayoga mUkyone e ja zuddha upayoga. e phAIlane samabhAve nikAla karIne javA devI, jJAne karIne zuddha karavI e zuddha upayoga. keTalAka lokone ajAgRti hoya chene, te phAIlono nikAla thato nathI ane ema mAnIne tamane bahu bhIDa AvI hoya to mahIM keTalo badho nikAla karavAno rahI jAya. ekadama bahu bhIDa AvI hoyane bahu eTa e TAIma phAIlo AvI hoya to keTalAkano nikAla thAya ne keTalAkano nikAla thayA vagara jato rahe. thAya ke nA thAya evuM ? praznakartA : hA, thAya. evuM bane ! dAdAzrI : tevuM Amane bhIDa nA AvI hoya toya jatAM rahe, tevI vAta che. upayoga rAkhyA sivAyano vyavahAra pharI pharI sahIo karAvavA mATe Avaze. tyAre upayoga rAkhazo to vyavahAra chUTaze. jyAre tyAre e joIne ja vyavahAra kADhavo paDaze. eTale ApaNe kahIe chIene, tamAre joyA vagara jatuM raheze e badhI phAIla pachI pharI Avaze.

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zuddha upayoga 211 ApaNI AjJAmAM rahyo te zuddha upayogamAM rahyo kahevAya. A phAIla AvIne, enoya samabhAve nikAla karavo. AmAM kaMI dhyAna nA ApIe, to samabhAve nikAla nA thayo kahevAya. ane jo dhyAna ApIe to zuddha upayoga. amArAM pAMca vAkyo ja zuddha upayogavALA che. haMmezAM 'zuM thaze' evuM pariNAma badalAya to badhuM bagaDe. kazuM thAya nahIM, kazuM thanAra ja nathI. ApaNo upayoga zuddha che to duniyAmAM ke koI nAma denAra nathI ne zuddha upayoga bagaDyo ke badhuM caDhI bese. praznakartA : Ama to evuM kahevAya chene zuddha upayoga be ghaDI rahe to savaoNza kevaLajJAna thAyane ? dAdAzrI : nA thAya. zuddha upayoga e kevaLajJAna ja kahevAya che, paNa ene aMza kevaLajJAna kahevAya che. savAza kevaLajJAna nA kahevAya. kAraNa ke pacatuM nathI A kALamAM. akrama che ne. tethI ja huM kahuM chuM ke eka guMThANuM, aDatAlIsa miniTa sudhI badhAnAM zuddhAtmA ekadhArA jotAM jotAM jAya te zuddha upayoga. te ekabAju gadheDuM dekhAya ne ekabAju zuddhAtmA dekhAya ema jotAM jotAM jaIe enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. bIjA jIvone zuddhAtmA juo, te ghaDIe zuddha upayoga hoya tamAro. jema che tema, yathArtha jovAnA jenA bhAva che, jJAnI puruSanI ApelI draSTie jovAnAM jenAM bhAva che ene zuddha upayoga prApta thAya ja ! have to ApaNe mULa vAta upara ja AvI javAnuM. ApaNe je sTAnDarDa jANI gayA, te sTAnDarDanA pustakonI jarUra nA rahIne ApaNe ? have AtmAnI zuM hakIkata che ane have AtmA tarIke kevI rIte vartavuM eTaluM ja jovAnuM rahyuM. ta jue kartA koI jagamAMhI ! praznakartA : gALone gALonA svarUpamAM nahIM jovAnI ema Apa kaho cho ? 212 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : e gALa de che ne, te ghaDIe kartA nathI. kartA juo to e azubha upayoga kahevAya. jagatamAM tameya kartA nathI ne koI rtA che nahIM. mATe akartA bhAvathI jozo to enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. eTale amAro miniTe miniTe Avo zuddha upayoga hoya. tarata ja, ona dhI momenTa. nahIM to pachI azubha thaI jAya. tarata bagaDI jAya. pharI ApaNe ne ApaNe sudhAravuM paDazene ? zuddha upayoga eTale ke pote zuddha che, pote rtA nathI koI cIjano, pote akriya che. have paNa bIjAne zuM kahe ? tame mArA pyAlA kema phoDI nAkhyA ? eTale e zuddhatA nA rahI. e pote potAnI jAtane zuddha mAne che ane zuddha varteya che kharo, paNa pelAne tame pyAlA phoDI nAkhyA ema kahe che, eTale ene kartA mAne che, e kacAza che. praznakartA : eTale e tyAre upayogamAM nathI. dAdAzrI : nahIM, upayoga to che paNa A upayoga bagaDyo. zuddha upayogamAM nathI, azubha upayoga thayo. eTale koIne kartA mAnavo nahIM, to ja zuddha upayoga rahe. ApaNe akriya ane pelAya akriya. jagatamAM koI kartA che nahIM. kAraNa ke badhA zuddha AtmA che. ane ema jyAre anubhavamAM Ave, tyAre zuddha upayoga badhe rahe. huM karuM chuM, te kare che ane teo kare che, e bhAva nathI tyAM AgaLa zuddha upayoga che, saMpUrNa. A to saheja che te lAla vAvaTo koIke dharyo, gADInI AgaLa, 'tame zA AdhAre lAla vAvaTo dharo' eTale tyAM AgaLa kAcA paDI gayA. kAraNa ke e dharato ja nathI ! koI kartA dekhAvo na joIe, to e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. tethI mahAvIra bhagavAne kaheluM ne ke 'huM karuM chuM', 'tuM karuM chuM" ne 'teo kare che e mArA vijJAnamAM nathI, koIne koI paNa cIjano e kartA che evuM mAno, e mArA mokSa vijJAnamAM nathI. bIjA vijJAnamAM che. tame ophisamAM jAva te ghaDIe tamAro zuddha upayoga nA hoya to badhA ja kArakuno, kArakuno ja dekhAya. ane zuddha upayoga hoya to kArakuneya dekhAya ne zuddhAtmA ya dekhAya. evuM dareka bAbatamAM zuddha upayoga ja

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zuddha upayoga rAkhavo joIe. upayoga cUkAya nahIM. zudgha upayoga e ja samatA ne e ja badhuM. pachI bhale ne udayakarma game te nAca kare, teno vAMdho nathI. udayakarma e udayakarma kahevAya. e vyavasthitanA AdhIna che, ApaNA AdhIna nathI. phakta ApaNe to enAM jANakAra chIe ke A prakAranAM udayakarma hoya che. 213 zuddha upayogIne jagata nirdoSa ! zuddha upayoga thAya to Dakho ja nathI koI jAtano. sahejeya Dakho nathI. emAM badhuM AvI gayuM che. bIjA amArA vAkya zuddha upayoga karavA mATe che. eka eka vAkya ApeluM che, badhAM judAM. samaje to goTALo nA kare eTalA mATe kahyuM ke nirdoSa ja jagata che, emAM doSita zuM jovAnuM ? vagara kAmanA bIjAnA doSa juo tyArene ! haMmezAM doSa kyAre dekhAya ? to ApaNAmAM doSa Ubho thAya ke tarata bIjAno doSa dekhAya. niyama ja evo, nahIM to doSa nA dekhAya. eTale A badho upayoga bagaDI jAya pachI. bAkI paraupayoga to nathI thato. paraupayoga thato hoya tyAre to moTuM bagaDI jAya. kaSAya bhAva thAya. praznakartA : jagata nirdoSa che. te zuddha upayoga kharo, paNa e to bahArano upayoga thayo. dAdAzrI : nA, bahArano nathI. praznakartA H kAraNa ke e bAhya draSTi mATe thayone ? dAdAzrI : bAhya ne AMtarika eno savAla ja nathI raheto. kAraNa ke pote zuddha potAnI jAte rahevuM ane zuddha jovuM e zuddha upayoga. nirdoSa jovuM, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. praznakartA : eTale pote ekalo hoya tyAre potAnI jAtane paNa zuddha jovuM, e zuddha upayoga. dAdAzrI : zuddha jue che, e to mAne ja che. paNa potAnI aMdaranuM badhuM je sUkSma che e zeyane jovuM. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : je hoya ene jovuM. kharo upayoga to te ja che ne ? dAdAzrI : e badho sarakho ja, paNa chevaTe AnI para AvavuM paDe. kAraNa ke peluM bahAranuM to kAyamane mATe hoya nahIM. eka phero DisIjhana pUratuM ja che. upayoga bahAra rAkhavAno paNa zuddha upayoga rAkhavAno. mahIM kaMI oraDIo nathI ke mahIM ne mahIM rAkhI melavAno. bhagavAna mahAvIreya bahAra badhe upayoga rAkhatA hatA paNa zuddha upayoga. jagatano azuddha che, azubha che, zubha che ne Amano zuddha hoya. AmanuM jagatanA jevuM ja vartana badhuM, upayogamAM ja phera ! upayoga zuddha karavAno che. zuddha upayoga eTale bahAra Ama joIe to zuddhAtmA jovAya, potAnuM svarUpa zuddha che, bIjuM zuddha jovAya e zuddha upayoga, ne amArI AjJAmAM rahyo e saMpUrNa zuddha upayoga. 214 praznakartA : upayoga zuddha na rahe, enuM zuM pariNAma Ave ? dAdAzrI : upayoga zuddha nA rahe, eno je lAbha ApaNane maLavo joIe te maLe nahIM. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, be vastu eka sAthe cAlatI hoya, pelA mANasano doSa paNa dekhAya. jJAna paNa kahe ke bhaI, eno kaMI vAMka ja nathI. dAdAzrI : doSa to bAhya draSTithI dekhAya che ane aMtara draSTithI nirdoSa dekhAya che. e nirdoSa dekhAya che te ApaNuM samyak darzana. have nirdoSa nA dekhADe to e mANasa kAco paDI gayo kahevAya. emAM zuddha upayoga nathI. koI ajJAnIne pUchI Avo ke aMdara-bahAra judApaNAnI jAgRti be sAthe cAle che ? sAdhu-AcAryone pUcho, be sAthe cAle che ? tyAre kahe, nA, eka ja cAle che. kAraNa ke doSita ja dekhADyA kare ane tamane nirdoSa dekhADe che e. tyAMthI ja e jJAna thayuM che tamane. goThavaNI zuddha upayoga taNI ! praznakartA : zuddha upayoga kaI rIte karavo ? dAdAzrI : caMdulAla zuM karI rahyA che, ene joyA karavuM ane jANyA

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zuddha upayoga 215 karavuM e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. eTale potAnI prakRtine nihALavI, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. zuddha upayoga eTale e to niraMtara jAgRta. bIjA kazAmAM paDe ja nahIM. khAya kharA paNa khAvAmAM paDe nahIM, kazAmAM. badhAMne eTaluM badhuM jJAna nA rahe paNa amuka rahene toya bahu thaI gayuM. caMdubhAI zuM kare che ane tame juone, toya bahu thaI gayuM. caMdubhAI khAvAmAM rahetA hoya tene tame juo, eTale toya tame ghaNA AgaLa cAlyA. ApaNe ahIMyA jJAna lIdheluM hoya te badhA zuddha upayoga rAkhe. ane zuddha upayoga eTale zuM ? te 'caMdubhAI zuM karI rahyA che ? caMdubhAInuM mana zuM karI rahyuM che ?" e badhAMne vigatavAra jANavuM. jema sinemAmAM beThelA mANasane philama ane pote, bannene vigatavAra jANe che ke nathI jANatA ? eTaluM vigatathI e jANe tyAre e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. draSTA ane drazya eTalAM badhAM cheTAM hoya ke tyAre e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. - have temAM zuddha upayoganI zarUAta kevI thAya ? tyAre jema koI dhola mArato hoya ApaNane te ghaDIe tamane dekhAya ke, 'ahoho, caMdubhAI jevA sArA mANasane paNa A dhola mAre che !' tamane dekhAya chatAM tame mAno ke bhogave che caMdubhAI, mATe bhUla to potAnI ja ne ? A badhuM tamane ekajhekTa dekhAya ane e sAmo mANasa zuddha dekhAya, e zuddha ja che. tame jevA zuddha cho, evo e zuddha ja che. bhale eNe jJAna nathI lIdhuM. paNa e zuddha ja che. ene jo azuddha mAnazo to tamAro upayoga bagaDyo. tyAre kahe che e AtmA to zuddha che, paNa bahArano bhAga ? bahArano bhAga to Ano kharAba ja chene ? tyAre kahe, "nA, tamArA mATe e kharAba nathI. enA mATe kharAba che.' 'tyAre have sAheba zuM kaMI emAM nyAya batAvo. kema amAre mATe kharAba nahIM hoya ? dhola mAre che vaLI pAcho. rAjI thaIne mAre che.' tyAre kahe, 'e enA potAnA mATe kharAba che, paNa tamArA mATe kharAba nathI e. kAraNa ke tamAre samajI levuM joIe ke A karmanA udaye mArI rahyo che. konuM karma ? jene vAge che dhola, tenuM karma. to pachI eno zo doSa ?' kaho ! rIta hazene ? evuM nirdoSa jue tyAre zuddha 216 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) upayoga. ApaNane gALo bhAMDato hoya te ghaDIe nirdoSa dekhAya, tyAre zuddha upayoga. ApaNA hAthamAMthI hajAra rUpiyAnuM pAkITa e laI le to ApI devuM evo mata nathI. vakhate e caMdubhAI ane dhola mArIne pAchuM laI le, eya vAMdho nathI. paNa tamAre A badhuM sIna 'jovo' joIe. dhola mAre ne game te nAka dabAIne laI le, paNa ApaNe caMdubhAIne jANavuM joIe ke caMdubhAIe zuM karyuM ane pelAe zuM karyuM ? chatAMya enAmAM azuddhatA nA dekhAvI joIe, basa eTaluM ja. AnuM nAma zuddha upayoga. praznakartA : phakta A jovuM ne jANavuM eTaluM rahe, ene ja zuddha upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, e ja zuddha upayoga. mahIM kharAba vicAra AvyA ke Ama karo, tema karo, kusaMganA vicAro AvyA, te zuM AvyA te ApaNe joIe ane jANIe. eTale ApaNe pharaja bajAvI dIdhI. ane tanmayAkAra thayA ke marI gayA ! jovA-jANavAno artha zuM ke tanmayAkAra nA thavAya. basanI rAha jotAMya zuddha upayoga ! A jJAna maLeluM hoya, tene to eka miniTanI navarAza hoya nahIM. mane eka miniTa navarAzanI nathI maLatI, eka sekanDeya navarAza nahIMne ! basa mATe UbhA rahyA hoya, ne basa nA Ave to loka Ama jo jo kya kare. Ama jue, Ama jue ne DAphAM mAryA kare. eTale tame tyAM AgaLa UbhA rahyA hoya to DApho mArIne zuM kAma che ? ApaNI pAse badhuM jJAna chene ! eTale badhAM UbhAM hoya, temanAmAM zuddhAtmA "joIe". jatAMAvatAM hoya, temanAmAM zuddhAtmA "joIe'. baso jatI hoya, tenI mahIM beThelAM hoya temanAmAM zuddhAtmA "joIe'. ema karatAM karatAM ApaNI basa AvIne UbhI rahe. eTale badhAnAmAM zuddhAtmA joIe ne ApaNe ApaNuM zuddhAtmAnuM dhyAna karyA karIe to ApaNo TAIma nakAmo jAya nahIM. ane

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zuddha upayoga 2 17 218 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jagatanA loko to DAphAM mAryA ja kare. Ama jue, Ama jue ane pachI mahIM akaLAyA kare. basa nA Ave eTale akaLAmaNa thAya. eTale ApaNe ApaNo upayoga zA mATe bagADIe ? ane zuddhAtmA jo jo karIe to keTalo badho AnaMda thAya ! eTale hathiyAra prApta thayuM che to vAparavuM joIene ! nahIM to hathiyAra kATa khAI jAya ! praznakartA : A zuddha upayoganI je vAta che ke A rastAmAM rileTiva-riyala jotAM jotAM jAya, e pAchuM bahu lAMbo samaya cAle eTale emAMya kaMTALo Ave, pachI bIjuM kaMIka mAMge. dAdAzrI : e kaMTALo Ave che toya ApaNe ene jANavo paDe ! ene jANIe eTale kaMTALo utarI jAya. praznakartA : hA, dAdA. kaMTALo Ave che e jANe, paNa A zuddha upayogamAM rahe chatAM kaMTALo Ave e ekyualI evuM kema thAya ? dAdAzrI : A zuddha upayoga e kharo zuddha upayoga hoya. emAM mana bhaLeluM hoya che, nahIM to kaMTALo Ave kema karIne ? zuddha upayogamAM zI rIte kaMTALo Ave ?! jyAM zuddha ja jovuM tyAM ! zuddha upayogamAM rIta badalavAnI jarUra pachI. praznakartA : A upayogamAM rahe, AnaMda utpanna thavo joIe. te AnaMdathI Ama kaMTALo nA Ave. dAdAzrI : zuddha upayoga enuM nAma kahevAya ke AnaMda hoya. kaMTALo Ave, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga nahIM. tyAM baMdha karI devuM paDe. bhUla thavA mAMDI, jJAta pachI jAgRtitI thI ziphTa ! tamAre to manuSyapaNAno lAbha UThAvavAno che. kAraNa ke A vijJAna pAmyA pachI koI upayoga cUke nahIM. ane A to eka ziphaTanuM nahIM, zrI ziphaTanuM kArakhAnuM che. ane A jJAna maLyA pachI eka ziphaTa hoya ? praznakartA : nA. e to UMgha veThIne UjAgaro lIdho, enA jevuM thayuM lAge che. - dAdAzrI : UMgha eTale zuM ? AtmAne kothaLAmAM pUrIne upara bAMdhI devuM che. te ajJAnIne mATe chUTa che ke AtmAne kothaLAmAM ghAlIne sUI jAya. paNa A jJAna pAmyA pachI, zrI ziphaTa calAvavI joIe. praznakartA : te dAdA, amane chUTa che evI ? dAdAzrI : tyAre mane ekalAne chUTa che A badhI ? tamAre e kAyamanuM sukha, alaukika sukha joIe che, to e zuddha upayoganuM phaLa che. tuM upayoga rAkhuM chuMne ? A badhAne bahu bhAvatuM jamaNa AvyuM hoya, te ghaDIe emAM upayoga hoya ke nA hoya badhAMno ? pachI paisA gaNavAmAM upayoga nA rahe tAro ? e upayoga kahevAya. eka ja jagyAe jAgRti sthira thaI e upayoga. badhe vikharAI nA jAya. praznakartA : e to bahArano upayoga kahyone Ape, to pelo chellI dazAno jJAnIno upayoga to kaMI judu ja kaheluMne Ape ? dAdAzrI : e bahArano upayoga rahe toya bahu uttama kahevAya. to ja pelo jJAna upayoga Ave. bahArano upayoga rahe nahIM pachI pelo jJAna upayoga Ave kema karIne ? praznakartA: dAdA, e bahArano upayoga e kevA prakAre eTale dAkhalA tarIke savArathI badhI prakriyA zarU thAya dehanI-vANInI-mananI, e vakhate enAthI judA rahIne jovA-jANavAnI kriyA ane pote A svarUpa che evI jAgRtine ekAgra karavuM tyAM upayoga Ave che ? praznakartA: paNa Ape kIdhuM emAM mana bhaLe eTale kaMTALo Ave, to zuddha upayogamAM raheto hoyane emAM mana bhaLe to zuM karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : manane joyA karavAnuM. manane ApaNe jANIe kharAM, kaI sthitimAM che atyAre mana !

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zuddha upayoga 219 220 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : e to jJAna kahevAya. tuM rasoI banAvato hoyane tuM DAphAM mAruM ke tarata ko'ka tane nA kahe ke dhyAna barobara rAkha, nahIM to rasoIne bagADI nAkhIza. barobara dhyAna rAkhavuM e upayoga. praznakartA : to e rasoImAM Akho upayoga mUkavo paDene ? rasoI banAvatI vakhate ? dAdAzrI : hA. praznakartA : to ApaNo A zuddha upayoga ane pelo rasoImAM upayoga gayo to emAM rasoImAM upayoga e vaparAyo kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hAsto. praznakartA : eTale e ja ke e vaparAvo joIe ke nA joIe ? kharekhara jo e rasoI upayoga mUkyA vagara bane ja nahIM. evI rIte ja to pachI tyAM upayoga Ama e kevI rIte rAkhavo ? dAdAzrI : rasoImAM upayoga rAkhavo. eTale teno artha evo DirekTa nahIM. e to rasoImAM to upayoga eTale zuM ke koNa rasoI kare che e paheluM jANavuM joIe. rasoI karanAra koNa che te jANavuM joIe. pote koNa chuM e jANavuM joIe ane rasoI karanAra zuM dhyAna rAkhe che. e jovuM joIe. e badhuM ya eTa e TAIma thAya, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. praznakartA : eTale rasoInI kriyA ke rasoIno Akho je vyavahAra e naDato nathI paNa A jAgRti nA rahevI e naDe che. dAdAzrI : hA. te e ja naDene ! praznakartA : peluM to bheguM thavuM e vyavasthitane tAbe thayuMne ? dAdAzrI : hA. praznakartA : ApaNe A AratI karIe che dAdA, te vakhate AMkho to baMdha hoya chatAMya ApanI je AratI utare che tevuM dekhAya athavA sImaMdhara svAmInuM dekhAya athavA to pachI peluM eka-eka akSare akSara vaMcAya to e kevo upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e badhuM to ajJAnIo ya kare che. AratI karavA jAyane to AMkho mIMcIne dekhAya badhuM, dIvo karato hoya to. upayogamAM A kahyuM te rIte hovuM joIe. kartA judo, jJAtA judo. kartA enA svabhAvamAM che ke nahIM, ke rtA ajAgRtimAM che teya pAchuM jovuM. caMdubhAI che te eno upayoga rAkhe ne enI upara AtmA potAno upayoga rAkhe, be sAthe sAthe thAya tyAre upayogamAM rahyuM kahevAya. praznakartA : eTale A mazInarImAM upayoga mUkavo paDe che ke paisA gaNavAmAM upayoga mUkavo paDe ke A rasoI banAvavAmAM to e badhA upayoganuM eTale Ama mahIM kevuM rahevuM joIe ke A pUruM thAya to sAruM, A na hovuM ghaTe evuM ? dAdAzrI : nA, evuM tevuM nahIM. upayoga rAkhavAmAM to kazuM aDatuM ja nathI. e mazInarI UbhI karatAM rahe nahIMne upayoga, bAkI upayoga rAkhavAvALAne to kazuM naDatuM ja nathI. Ama hovuM joIe ne Ama nA hovuM joIe, e to jAgRti che, e upayoga nathI. AtmA AtmAnuM karyA kare, caMdubhAI caMdubhAInuM karyA kare. caMdubhAInuM mana, mananuM kAma karyA kare. potapotAnA dharmo badhA bajAve, enuM nAma upayoga. vAMcatA cUkAya upayoga Ama ! kaMIthI A citralekhA megejhIna ahIM ? praznakartA : koI suMdara vArtA AmAM cAlatI hoya ane huM vAMcato houM, to te vakhate mAre dhyAna kevuM rAkhavAnuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : vAMcavAmAM ja rahetuM hoya. praznakartA : to e upayoga nA kahevAyane ?

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221 222 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) zuddha upayoga 221 dAdAzrI : hA, eTaluM cUkyA, eTaluM pharI karavuM paDaze. praznakartA : to eno matalaba ke vAMcavuM ja nA joIene ? dAdAzrI : vAMcavuM nA joIe, te ApaNA hAthamAM sattA che ? praznakartA : to dAdA, e to vaMcAI jAya, emAM rasa paDe che... dAdAzrI : nA, paNa vaMcAI jatI vakhate jo kadI Ama vAMcatA jAya ane eka bAju jAgRti rAkhatA jAya ke A khoTuM thaI rahyuM che, A na thavuM joIe. vAMcatA jAya paNa e nA thavuM joIe evuM manamAM rahe. praznakartA: dAdA, Apa je vAMco cho to Apa kevI rIte vAMco cho ? dAdAzrI : mAre to evI rIte ja rahe badhuM. AvuM nA hovuM joIe chatAM AvuM vAMcIe chIe. zAstro vAMcatA upayoga ! AvI jAya che e pAcho svamAM ghAlI de. AvuM karavAnuM che. bIjuM kazuM, ekanI pAchaLa nahIM paDavAnuM ! eTale jJAnapaNAnA daravAje ApaNuM jJAna UbhuM raheluM hoyane, tyAM e jJAna badhuM kAma karyA ja kare. bIjA upayogamAM jAya ke cetave ane ApaNe ahIM jJAnI puruSa pAse to bIjA upayogamAM jAya ja nahIM. A to caMdubhAI, caMdubhAInuM kArya kare ne tame tamAruM kArya karo, beu kArya karyA kare. ahIM to juduM ja rahe enI meLe. bIjA upayogamAM jAya ja nahIM. tamAre zuddha upayoga karavo na paDe. ahIM zuddha upayoga ja rahe. jJAnI puruSanI pAse satsaMganuM phaLa che. zuddha upayogamAM ja rahe. Dakho ja nA thavA de ! upayogamAM rahevAtI vADa ! ekaluM zAstra vAMca vAMca kare to e pachI zAstra thaI jAva tame. je karIne te rUpa thaI jAva. pAchA copaDI thaI jAva. AtmA thayA chene, te pAchAM copaDI thaI jAva ! hA, jevuM ciMtave evo thaI jAya. eTale ApaNe zuM karavAnuM ? zuM banyA kare che e joyA karavAnuM, paNa te kevuM ? jJAnapaNAnA daravAje UbhuM rahevAnuM. jene ApaNA loko prajJA kahe che. prajJA eTale zuM ? jJAnapaNAno daravAjo, te A homa(sva) ane A phorena (para), e juduM dekhADe che. te phorenamAM jAya te ghaDIe ApaNane kahe, 'phorenamAM haMDyA'. eTale pAchuM ApaNe pAchAM pharIne pratikramaNa karI laIe ke have nahIM. to pAchAM to pharI ja jaIe chevaTe. 'phorenamAM haMDyA" evuM cetave ke nA cetave ? praznakartA : cetave ! dAdAzrI : hA, eTale basa. e ApaNane cetave ne ApaNe pAchA pharIe, ema karatAM karatAM ja Ano ukela AvI gayo. upayoga je paramAM praznakartA : ApaNA mahAtmA jema jema jJAnane upayogamAM lAve tema tema temanI jJAna avasthA vadhatI jAya, ke pachI jJAna maLyA bAda upayoga na rAkhavA chatAMya ApanI kRpAthI jJAnamAM saMpUrNatA Ave ja ? dAdAzrI : upayogamAM ja rahevuM joIe. upayoga saMsAramAM hoya ane ApaNuM jJAna vadhyA kare evuM bane nahIM. saMsAra nikAlI bAbata che, nikAlI bAbatamAM upayoga nA hoya. je bane e joyA karavAnuM. praznakartA : dAdA, to sAco upayoga kevI rIte rAkhavo e samajAvo. dAdAzrI : pAMca AjJA e sAco upayoga ja che. tame badhAmAM zuddhAtmA juo, A phAIla che evuM juo, toya zuddhAtmA joyo kahevAya ke zuddhAtmA juo toya phAIla thaI gaI. eTale A pAMca AjJA e ja upayoga che. ethI pachI vadhAre jJAna upayoga pachI vadhato jAya aMdara. kharo upayoga vadhato jAya, A vADa che upayogamAM rahevAnI. upayoga rAkhyA sivAya jJAna vadhe ja nahIM koI dahADoya. upayoga eTale atyAra sudhI saMsAramAM upayoga hato, AtmA vartato hato saMsAramAM, te have AtmA AtmAmAM varte, enuM nAma upayoga. AtmA AtmAmAM varte zI rIte ? tyAre kahe, chokaro dUdha DhoLato hoya, te joyA kare. tyAM jaIne vAre

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zuddha upayoga 223 224 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) kharo. ApaNe tyAre caMdulAlane kahevuM ke bAbAne vAro, kaSAya nahIM karavAnA. imozanala nahIM thavAnuM. vizeSa phoDa zuddha upayogatA ! praznakartA : ahIM ApanA sAnidhyamAM beThA hoIe ane manamAM zaktio mAgIe ke dAdA, mane pAMca AjJA niraMtara paLAya evI zaktio Apo, e zuddha upayoga gaNI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : zuddha upayoganI najIkanuM kahevAya. zuddha upayoganuM kharuM sAdhana e kahevAya. zuddha upayoga to zuddha ja hoyane ! tuM zuM zaktio mAgyA kare ? zuddha upayoganuM sAdhana kahevAya che. A sAdhanathI zuddha upayoga bhaNI jaI zakAya ApaNAthI. zuddha upayoga to nIvaLa zuddha ja hoya. kazuM mAMgaNI karavAnI nA hoyane ! tyAga karavAnuM, choDavAnuMya nA hoya. kazuM Dakho-Dakhala hoya ja nahIM, zuddha upayoga ja. AkhA jagatane zubhAzubha upayoga che ane A zuddha upayoga che. praznakartA : dAdA, svapariNAma ane parapariNAma judAM pADavAM e upayoga kahevAya, ekjhakTalI ? dAdAzrI : potAnA homa DipArTamenTanA daravAje UbhA rahIne, bIjuM badhuM je homa ke phorenanuM Ave to, homanuM Ave to aMdara, phorenanuM Ave to aMdara nahIM evuM rAkho. praznakartA : eTale e ekkekTa upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e chene, e zarUAtano ekajhekTa upayoga, e sthaLa upayoga. praznakartA : e paNa sthaLamAM ja jAya ! dAdAzrI sUkSmanI to e tamane khabareya nA paDe. sUkSma tamane samajAvuM toya nA samajaNa paDe. kAraNa ke zabdathI pakaDAya evuM nathI eTale e tamArI jAtane anubhava thAya tyAre kharuM e samajAya. bahu ApaNe to jANavAnI jarUreya nathI. ApaNe ahIM e sthULa sudhI Ave to ya bahu thaI gayuM. praznakartA : sthULanuM pariNAma pachI sUkSma tarapha jAya ? dAdAzrI : e ja sUkSma taraphane ! ahIM ja cokhkhuM karavAnuM. ATaluM cokhkhuM karyuM to sUkSma to enI meLe Ave, ApaNe karavA nA javuM paDe. e to enI meLe Ave. A AnuM pArAyaNa thayuM nathI eTale peluM nathI AvatuM. praznakartA : A abhyAsathI AvI zakene upayoga ? dAdAzrI : mANasane abhyAsa to joIene ? abhyAsa eTale jAgRtinI aMdara pote taiyAra rahevuM. praznakartA : e zuM kahyuM? dAdAzrI : jAgRti ema ne ema vahI jAya. khoTuM thayuM, khoTuM thaI rahyuM che paNa kazo abhyAsa kare nahIM. jAgRti dekhADyA ja karene, khoTuM thaI rahyuM che. tAre jAgRti dekhADe kaMI ? praznakartA : dekhADe evuM badhuM. dAdAzrI : Akho dahADoya ? kevaDI UMcI thaI jAgRti ! duniyA khoLe che, paNa A jAgRti nA rahe. e jAgRti niraMtara rahe evI jAgRti meM tamane ApelI che. e jAgRtino upayoga karavAno che. jarA pahelAMnI Teva paDelIne, te tyAM lIsI jagyAe lapasavAnI Teva paDelI che. praznakartA : kharI vAta che, hA. dAdAzrI : te jarAka tyAM jAgRti rAkhI ke A lIsI jagyA che ne lapasI javAya evuM jevuM che ane chatAM udayamAM AvyuM che, eTale ApaNe kahevuM ke caMdubhAI tuM lapase che ne 'huM jouM chuM'. vAMdho kharo ? praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : paNa A to lapasI ja jAya. e pote hau caMdubhAI joDe lapasI jAya. eTale tyAM upayoga rAkhavAno. jema kUvA upara gayelo. mANasa enI vAIphane yAda kare, chokarAMone yAda kare ke kUvAne yAda kare ? kUvA upara besavAnuM thAya to cetene ?

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zuddha upayoga 225 226 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) agara to koI dariyAnI vacce be phUTano rasto karelo hoya ne be bAju relIMga nA hoya, tyAM javAnuM te ghaDIe vAIpha yAda Ave ke ene lakSmI yAda Ave ke baMgalA yAda Ave ? praznakartA : koI nA yAda Ave. dAdAzrI : haMa. enuM nAma upayoga. dAdAe eka avatArI mokSamArga siddhAMtapUrvaka Apyo to pachI e siddhAMtane ApaNe vaLagI rahevuM joIe. upayoga emAM ja rAkhavo joIe. ane peluM maraNa, dariyAmAM paDe to eka ja avatAranuM thAya. jyAre A lAkho avatAranuM maraNa thAya. mahIM to caMdubhAIne kahevuM joIe ke "sIdho rahe'. upayoga cUkAvAtA sthAno.... praznakartA : upayoga cUkavAnI jagyAo khAsa karIne kaI kaI ? dAdAzrI : ApaNane mIThAza Ave, mahIMthI, bArathI, tyAM upayoga cUkAya. praznakartA: rAgavALI jagyAmAM ? dAdAzrI : bahAranI mIThAza Avene, ApaNe vAto cAlatI hoya ne gamI, eTale pachI upayoga cUke agara bahu baphAro hoya ane ekadama pavana Ave toya upayoga cUkI jAya. aMdara hoya toya bahAra nIkaLI jAya. 'hAza, bahu sarasa pavana Ave che." e sukha bahAranuM bhogavyuM. tyAM upayoga nA cUke kharo jAgRta mANasa ! bahAra vAto cAlatI hoyane te ApaNane mIThAza AvatI hoya to pachI ene upayoga cakAya. mIThAza nA AvatI hoya to upayogamAM rahe. bahAra mIThAza karavA jevuM che, zuM te ? kAMkarA halAvavAnA che badhAM. murakha mANasonA sodA jevuM che A. mUrakha mANasa sodA karatA hoya sAmasAmI, emAM ene zuM phAyado ? eTale evuM che badhuM ! praznakartA : rAganA paramANu vadhAre cArja thayelA hoya to upayoga cUkI jAyane ? dAdAzrI : evuM kazuM nahIM. ApaNane ruci hoya to cUkI jAya. ruci nA hoyane, ruci ApaNe AtmA upara hoya to upayoga khasI javAnuM koI kAraNa nathI. pavana Avato hoya te ghaDIe hAza kare eTale upayoga cUkyo. pavanano vAMdho nahIM, paNa te hAza nA thAya te ghaDIe pachI svAdiSTa vastu AvI, e TesTa lAgyo eTale upayoga cukI jAya. eTale A badhI ame vAta karIe eTale tamAre koka phero yAda Ave pachI eTale upayoga rahe pAcho. e jAgRti rahevI muzkela chene ! hamaNe kaMTALelo hoya ne pavana Ave tyAre, 'hA' thaI ke peluM upayoga cUkyA tame. gADha anubhUti pachI upayoga sahaja praznakartA : eka vAta nIkaLI hatI, ajJAnano jeTalo sajjaDa anubhava thayo che evo jJAnano sajjaDa anubhava thavo joIze. dAdAzrI : jJAnano gADha anubhava thAya eTale pachI upayoga devAno rahyo nahIM, ema ne ema rahyA kare ! gADha anubhava nA thayo hoya tyAM sudhI upayoga devo paDe ! upayoga e puruSArtha kahevAya che. ane puruSArtha e pUro kyAre pahoMce ? gADha pahoMcyuM eTale puruSArtha pUro thaI gayo ! praznakartA : to ajJAnatAno anubhava Ubho thAya che, tyAre e upayoga devAnI jarUra che ? dAdAzrI : upayoga tyAre ja devAno hoyane ! praznakartA eTale e anubhavanI asaramAM pote nA lapaTAya. dAdAzrI : potAno upayoga pAcho rAkhene, to ajJAnatAnA anubhavanI asaramAM lapaTAya nahIM. e TAIma potAno kahevAya che, samayasAra kahevAya. e samaya sAra vagarano nA thAya. nahIM to samayasAra nA kahevAya, parasamaya kahevAya. AtmAno upayoga rahyo, e samayasAra badho. je samaya svane mATe gayo e badho samayasAra, je samaya parane mATe gayo e badho parasamaya. praznakartA H ajJAnano anubhava kone thAya che ane jJAnano anubhava

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zudgha upayoga kone thAya che ? dAdAzrI : A ajJAnano anubhava buddhine thAya ane ahaMkArane thAya ane jJAnano anubhava prajJAne thAya. 227 svasamaya, parasamaya te zuddha upayoga ! praznakartA : svasamaya, te A zuddha upayoga ja ? dAdAzrI : svasamaya e zuddha upayoga. svasamaya e pahelethI zarUAta thAya che. te zuddha upayoga AvatAM pahelAM e svasamaya thAya che. kAraNa ke A samaya tame kevaLa AtmA mATe ja kADhyo. haju AtmA prApta thayo nathI. AtmA mATe ja kADhyo mATe samayasAra. e samayasAra tarIke Avyo ane zuddha upayogamAM to e samayasAra hoya ja. emAM to dIvA jevI spaSTa vAta che. A to badhAMne zuddha upayoga hoya nahIM eTale A bahAranAM lokoya paNa e samayasAra karI zake, eTalI kamANI to e karI zake. bahAranA lokone hakka che samayasAra kamAvAno. samayasAra kema kahyo ke je samaya sArarUpamAM vaparAyo, eTale AtmA hetu mATe vaparAyo e badho samayasAra ane jagata hetu mATe vaparAyo e badho asAra, parasamaya. samayasAra e nIcenA padathI Ave che. kAraNa ke bIjAM badhAM lokone zuddha upayoga hoI zake nahIMne ! tyAre kahe, samayasAra kamAya ke nA kamAya ? tyAre kahe, samayasAra kamAya. e game te rIte enI pAse mUDI vadhatI jAya dADe dA'De. Ama vigatavAra samajIene to ApaNane samajAI jAya. ...evuM jJAta, dhyAta matohArI ! paraupayoganA vaheNamAM ja AkhuM jagata vahyA kare. upayoga zuddha rahyo eTale samatA rahe. viSama paristhitimAMya samatA rahe. cogaradamanuM rAjAnuM lazkara caDhI AvyuM hoya, bomba paDatA hoya, game eTalI muzkelIo sAme AvIne paDatI hoya, toya paNa samatA nA jAya. badhA yogo samatvayoga karavA mATe che. jo samatvayoga nA thayo hoya to AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jaMgalamAM jaIne poka mela ! nirAMte raDavA de !! ane evo upayoga thayo eTale samatA ja hoya. eTale peluM vAkya bolyA ke, 'zuddha upayoga ne samatAdhArI. jJAna, dhyAna manohArI', enuM jJAna kevuM hoya ? mananuM haraNa kare evuM hoya. dhyAna kevuM hoya ? mananuM haraNa kare evuM hoya. 'karma kalaMkaku dUra nivArI, jIva vare zivanArI' pArvatI nahIM, zivanArI e nhoya. paNa zivanArI eTale mokSa. mokSane vare, kahe che. 228 bhIkha pUjAvAtI ! praznakartA : dAdA, A pUjAvAnI je bhIkha che e jAya kaI rIte ? kaI rIte eDajasTamenTa levuM enI sAme ? upayoga kevI rIte rAkhavo ? dAdAzrI : e to apamAnanI Teva pADI daIe tyAre. praznakartA H prApta karavI che ayAcaka dazA ane dareka bAbatanI A bhIkha paDelI che mahIM. dAdAzrI : ayAcakapaNuM to javA do ne, paNa bhIkha chUTe to ya bahu thaI gayuM. A bhIkha to have ApaNe koInA kaMpAunDamAM thaIne jatA hoIe ne e mANasa gALo de evo hoya to roja tyAM thaIne javuM, roja gALo khAvI. paNa upayogapUrvaka sahana karavuM joIe. nahIM to ene e Teva paDI jAya pelI. lIhaTa thaI jAya ! praznakartA : upayogapUrvaka sahana karavuM eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : ApaNI benane uThAvI gayelo hoya, te uThAvI gayelo hoya tenI upara prema hoya ApaNane ? zuM hoya ? praznakartA : dveSa hoya. dAdAzrI : te UMghamAM hoya ke upayogapUrvaka hoya ? TreDa parasenTa upayogapUrvaka hoya. bilakula upayogapUrvaka hoya. pachI corI karavA jAya te upayogapUrvaka jAgRti rAkhI haze ke UMghato haze ?

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zuddha upayoga 229 230 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : upayogapUrvaka hoya. dAdAzrI : mATe upayoga samajI jAva. ahIM to upayogavALA kAmamAM lAge. koI apamAna kare tyAre moTuM bagaDI gayuM che, evI khabara paDe, to napho-khoTa nA jAya, no losa, no prophiTa. ane bahAra moTuM bagaDyuM to khoTa jAya. kone khoTa jAya ? pudgalane, AtmAne nahIM. ane bahAra moDhuM bagaDyuM nahIM, kliyara rahyuM eTale AtmAne AnaMda rahyo. AtmAno napho thAyane ! praznakartA : moDhuM bagADyuM to pudgalane zuM khoTa jAya ? dAdAzrI : pudgalane to khoTa gayelI ja ne ! praznakartA : paNa ene jAgRtipUrvaka rahyA to enuM moTuM nA bagaDyuM. dAdAzrI : keTalAMka apamAna thayuM ke enuM jo Aje moTuM caDhI jAya to potAne khabara paDe. huM pUchuM pachI ke tane potAne khabara paDI che ? tyAre kahe hA, paDI che. paNa zI rIte samuM kare ? chatAM e samuM karavuM. chevaTe sahaja karavAnuM che. e sahaja to bahu TAImathI sAMbhaLato sAMbhaLato Ave tyAre sahaja thato Ave. praznakartA : gALo bhAMDato hoya to enA kampAunDamAM pharIthI javuM, paNa zuM karavA javuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe vecAto bhADe lAvIene to gALo bhAMDe nahIM. ane bhADe lAveluM bhAMDe to asara nA thAya. emAM bhalIvAra nA Ave. e kudaratI rIte gALo bhAMDato hoyane, to uttama zakti Ave ne ! eTale evI zakti kAcI rahetI hoya to tamAre levAnI jarUra. praznakartA : apamAnanI sAme upayoga batAvyo Ape hamaNAM, e ame samajyA, paNa mAnanI sAme je upayoga che e bAbatamAM thoDuM prakAza pADo. dAdAzrI : mAna Ape tyAre to upayogapUrvaka eTale zuM ke A mAna kone Ape che e jANavuM joIe. mane nahIM, A to mArA pADozIne mAna Ape che, pudgalane Ape che. praznakartA : mAna Ape tyAre mIThuM lAgene ApaNane ! eTale miThAInI jema mArI pADe cheApaNane e ! dAdAzrI : pudgalanuM kahyuM eTale ApaNane aDyuM nahIMne ! levA-devA nahIMne ApaNe mAna-apamAna te pudgalane Ape che, ApaNane nahIM. enuM nAma jAgRtipUrvaka, upayogapUrvaka. caMdubhAIne mAna Ape che, emAM tamane zuM levAdevA ? eTale mAna-apamAna Ape to ene mAthe ghAlI devuM. to hitakArI thaI paDe, nahIM to hitakArI thAya nahIM. praznakartA : have ApaNane mAna Ape che enI jagyAe ApaNe evuM rAkhIe ke A dAdAne mAna Ape che, AtmAne mAna Ape che, to? dAdAzrI : nA, evuM nahIM. e caMdubhAIne Ape che evuM jANavuM joIe. dAdAne levAdevA zuM che ? dAdAne mAnanI jarUra ja nahIM AtmAne mAnanI jarUra ja nathI. A badhA tALA maLavA joIe. emAM sahamata thavuM joIe, enuM nAma tALo. tALo sahamatathI ja hoya. ApaNane khabara paDe ke A bhUla thAya che ! jagatane bhAvatuM che e Ape tamane. tamane e Teva paDavI nA joIe. mAna Ape to ya nahIM, apamAna Ape to ya nahIM. apamAna karavA mATe mANasa rAkho to enI majA Ave ? praznakartA : nA, e majA nA Ave. dAdAzrI : ane nATakamAM gALo bhAMDe to enI asara thAya ? 'tuM nAlAyaka chuM, tuM Ama chuM, cora chuM, badamAza chuM" ema kahe to asara thAya ? nA thAya. kAraNa ke goThavaNI karelI che. kSullaka bAbate zuddha upayoga cUkAya ! praznakartA : ApaNe koI maMdiramAM darzana karavA gayA, eka mANasa aMdara pesavAnI nA kahe. e to nA kahe, ApaNe to pAMcaso rUpiyA bhADuM kharacIne gayA ne tyAM gayA tyAre kaheze, maMdiramAM nathI pesavAnuM eTale magaja bagaDe...

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zuddha upayoga dAdAzrI : hA, paNa ApaNe zuddha upayoga cUkavo ? ane nAnuM chokaruM nA kahetuM hoya to tame eksepTa karo to pachI zuddha upayoga rahI zake. tamane zuM khoTa jAya che ? napho thAya e juo ! praznakartA : nA, paNa enI mAlikInuM hoya ema nA pADe... dAdAzrI : mAlikI-nAmAlikI ApaNe kazo vAMdho nahIM. karoDo avatAre prApta thayelo zuddha upayoga, ene A khoI naMkhAya AvI bAbatamAM ? bhagavAnane to emanI potAnI dIkarI jo uThAvI jato hoya 231 toya e zuddha upayoga nA cUke ne tamAre nAnI nAnI bAbatamAM, A kaMI choDI uThAvI jAya evI bAbata ja nathIne A ! praznakartA H pote zuddhAtmAmAM keTalo rahe che, e TesTa karavA mATe A badhAM upakArI nimitto ja kahevAyane ? dAdAzrI : zuddhAtmAmAM to rahe, paNa zuddha upayogamAM kevI rIte rahe ? zuddha upayoga eTale zuM ? doSita mANasa nirdoSa dekhAya, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. ane potAnI chokarI uThAvI jato hoya evo doSita hoya toya paNa nirdoSa dekhAya to e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. kAraNa ke kharekhara riyalI spikiMga potAnI koI chokarIya nathI ne pote koIno bApoya nathI, A to badhuM bhrAMti che. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, evI jo bhrAMti hoya to e koNa maMdiramAM pesavAnI nA kahenAro ane ame janArA koNa ? dAdAzrI : bhrAMtine lIdhe e nA kahe che bicAro ane tamane rIsa caDhe che bhrAMtine lIdhe. bhrAMti vagarano mANasa nA kaheya nahIM ! e to mArI hAjarImAM eka vakhata eka maMdiramAMthI badhAMne pAchAM javAnuM kahyuM to badhAM samatAmAM rahyA. e badhAM pacAsa mANaso te Ama sthira rahyuM na'tuM ? e vakhate zuddha upayoga rahyo. eno doSa nA dekhAyo, te kAma thaI gayuMne ! paisAmAM upayoga kevo cokkasa ?! praznakartA : mahAvIra bhagavAne to gautama svAmIne kaheluM 'samayam AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) goyam, mA pamAyaye', eTale eka samaya paNa pramAda nA sevIza. eTaluM badhuM jokhamI hoya che ? 232 dAdAzrI : jokhama chene ! pArakAnAmAM hAtha ghAlIe, emAM ApaNe zuM kamAyA ? ApaNI kamANI to baMdha thaI ne ! potAnA vepAramAM ja cokkasa rahevAnuM hoya. lobhiyo haMmezAM bahu cokkasa enA alaga vepAramAM, evI rIte zuddha upayogano lobha rAkhavo joIe. praznakartA : potAnA upayogano ? dAdAzrI : hA. lobhiyo enA vepAramAM bahu cokkasa e meM joyeluM. ahIM AgaLa beThA hoyane toya TAIma thAya eTale aTAvI-paTAvIne nIkaLI jAya. bahu pAko hoya. mane hau khoTuM nA lAgene, uparathI e sAheba, A Akho dahADo keDo badhIya du:khe che, ne jAtajAtanuM bole ne vepAra upara jato rahyo hoya ne ApaNe jANIe ke sUvA ghera gayo. enA lobhanA rakSaNa mATe game te badhuM kare e. evuM AnA lobhanA mATe game te karI zakAya. praznakartA : e upayoganI ekjhekTanesa e pakaDAya kevI rIte ? dAdAzrI : A mazInarI to rIpera karavA javAnuM hoya. te mazInarIonAM tane pArTa yAda Ave ne e badhuMya enuM yAda AvyuM. te Ama mahIM cAlyA karato hoya upayoga, te enI mahIMnuM bIjI jagyAe jatuM rahe tyAre pelo upayoga bagaDe badho. praznakartA : e to eka to bagaDelA upayogamAMya bagaDyo. mazInarInuM kAma e bagaDelA upayoga kahevAya. dAdAzrI : nA, ema nahIM. A to dAkhalo ApuM chuM. sImIlI ApuM chuM ke A Ano je upayoga rAkhe che, e mazInarImAM eno upayoga niraMtara cAlu rahyo che. tenI mahIM pAcho bahAra nIkaLI jAya eTale ApaNane khabara paDe, te UlTuM Ama gUMcavAya badhuM. agara to paisA gaNatA hoya beMkanA ane pelo chokaro sAmo Avyo eTale cIDhAya ke A sAluM... to te pelo gaNato gaNato bhUlI jAya.

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zuddha upayoga 233 234 praznakartA : hA, cUkI jAya. gaNatarImAM bhUla thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : bhUla thaI jAya. eTalA mATe pelA para ciDAyA kare ane pelo khasato nA hoya e upayoga cUkI jAya, e ene nahIM game. A paisAnI bAbatamAM upayoga nA cUke. eTalAM DAhyA che e. Ama badhuM AkhuM jagata eka paisAnI bAbatamAM zUravIra che. emAM upayoga nathI cUkatA. bIjI badhI bAbatamAM upayoga cUkI jAya che. praznakartA: A paisA gaNe che ane e gaNatarImAM bhUla nathI thatI mATe upayoga rahelo che. evI rIte A homa DipArTamenTanI vAtamAM kevuM hoya che ? dAdAzrI : naryuM upayoga cUkyAne ! eTale A ArkiTekTanI je DijhAIna hoyane, te DijhAIna upara chekA mArIe enA jevuM lAge che mahIM. tarata ja khabara paDI jAya ke upayoga cUkyo, duHkha thAya. praznakartA : e to pariNAma kIdhuM ke upayoga cUkyA eTale AvuM pariNAma UbhuM thAya. dAdAzrI : haM. praznakartA : paNa upayoga ekkekTa rahyo e kevI rIte potAne khabara paDe ? evuM AmAM zuM ? dAdAzrI : citta AghuMpAchuM nA thAya e jovAnuM. amAruM citta e moralInI peThe besI rahyuM hoya. sApane moralI vAgatI hoya ema besI rahe e rIte. evuM rahevuM joIe. upayoga khase nahIM pachI. saMjogono bhIDo Ave tyAre upayoga khaseDI nAkhe. kyAMya jato rahe pAcho. pachI pAchuM manamAM ema thAya ke baLyuM, A upayoga cUkyA chIe. upayoga cUkAya che. eya pAchAM jANanAra jANe che. praznakartA: jANanAra jANe che. ethI pelo sAMdho pharI meLavI zakAya chene ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : haM. pharI pAcho joInTa kare che. udaya ne AdhIna machavo(nAvaDuM) pharI jAya paNa pAcho potAnA dhArela raste ja laI jAya pAcho. evuM amuka hoyane ? udayane AdhIna pharI jAya. pavana evo hoyane, to pharI jAya ! vAMcatI vakhate ya zuddha upayoga ! praznakartA : koI caMcaLa nAmanI vyakti hoya ane zAMtA nAmanI vyakti hoya, e benI vAta AvatI hoya te vakhate tame zuM vAMco ? dAdAzrI : hA, te vakhate enA zuddhAtmA badhuM amArI jAgRtimAM hoya. A caMcaLa eTale enA zuddhAtmA upara ja amArI draSTi hoya. e to tamAruM nAma bole, to caMdubhAInA zuddhAtmA para draSTi hoya amArI. eTalI amArI ajAgRti nA hoya, jAgRti hoya. paNa upayoga AmAM ane jAgRti beu sAthe rahe. paNa pelo zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. upayoga bIjAmAM nA hoya, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga. bIjAmAM upayoga nA hoya ane jAgRti hoya e zuddha upayoga. praznakartA : e sTeja to bahu vAra lAgene ? dAdAzrI : eTale evuM amAre thoDuM bAkI rahyuMne ! thoDuMka bAkI rahe, bahu jUja. eno kazo hisAba nahIM e to. ApaNe kAma ja zuM ? ApaNane ahIM kazuM aDatuM ja nathIne ! aDe tene bhAMjagaDa ! zuddha upayoga bolatI vakhate ya ! A ame je bolIe te upayogapUrvakanuM. A rekarDa bole, tenA para amAro upayoga rahevAno. zuM zuM bhUla che ne zuM nahIM ? A cAvAdamAM kaMI bhUla che te ame joyA karIe bArIkAIthI ane A bole che te rekarDa che. lokone ya bole che rekarDa, paNa e manamAM ema jANe che ke huM bolyo. ame niraMtara zuddhAtmA upayogamAM rahIe chIe, tamArI joDe vAta karatAM karatAM paNa.

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zuddha upayoga 235 236 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) bharelo che tyAM sudhI limiTa che tamArI, alimiTeDa nathI. eTale tame to jJAnI ja cho; tamAre mAnavAnuM jJAnI paNa kahevAnuM nahIM ke 'jJAnI huM chuM' ! nahIM to pUchavA Avaze ane roja dasa jaNa tamArI pAse AvIne besaze. pelAnuM zuM thAya, pelAnuM zuM thAya, te pachI upAdhi thaze ! ane mAre tyAM huM kahuM ke jJAnI chuM, to vAMdho Avaze nahIM. praznakartA : eTale emAM upayoga cUkAya kema ? dAdAzrI : e dhIme dhIme niraMtara thavAnuM. A roDa upara vAhano Ava-jAva kare che, te ApaNo upayoga cUkAvaDAve che. te enA mAla pUrA thaI jaze, eTale pharI sAme che te dekhAyA karaze. ane eTale sudhI kahevAya ke upayoga nahIM rahyo, paNa chatAM upayoga che. kAraNa ke e upayoga nathI rahyo tene jANe che mATe upayoga che. eTale e upayoga che pAcho. praznakartA : lakSa be thAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. be lakSa nA thAya. lakSa eka ja thAya. vAto karavAnI, emAM mAre kazuM karavAnuM nahIM. ame to vAtomAM zuM thaI rahyuM e ja joyA karIe. ame eka ghaDIvAreya, eka miniTeya upayoganI bahAra nA hoIe. AtmAno upayoga hoya ja. ahIM page tela ghasatA hoya, te ghaDIe ame amArA AtmAnA upayogamAM hoIe. kAraNa ke amane zuM ? tela ghasanArA ghase che. mahAtmAoto zuddha upayoga ! zuddha upayoga e svataMtra kahevAya, e potAnI svataMtratA che. praznakartA: dAdA, paNa to pachI A je Ape jene jJAna ApyuM, e je mahAtmAo che, ene paNa e ja dazA hoya. dAdAzrI : e ja dazA hoya. paNa mahAtmAonI pAse sillakI sAmAna bahu chene, eno nikAla to karavo paDene ? to ja thAyane ! mAre sillakI sAmAna nathI eTale cAlyuM. sillakI sAmAna to UMco ja mUkavo paDe ! praznakartA: e rileTivamAM barobara che. dAdAzrI : hA. paNa rileTivano sillakI sAmAna nikAla karavA mATe upayoga cUkAya. tyAM sudhI cUkAya badhuM. have upayoga eTale zuM ke tame dhaMdhAnI bAbatamAM ho, dhaMdhAnA vicAramAM ja upayogapUrvaka ho ane te ghaDIe tamane koI lalacAve evo koI mANasa bhego thayo. tamArA manane lalacAve evo, to tamAro upayoga tyAM badalAI jAya. pelo upayoga dhAryo nA rahe. evI rIte A AtmAno zuddha upayoga ekadhAro nA rahe. peluM kaMIka karmano udaya Avyo eTale khasI jAya pachI. praznakartA : jJAnI sivAya ekadhAro rahe nahIM. dAdAzrI : nA, eTale tameya jJAnI ja cho. paNa tamane A mAla eTale Avo zuddha upayoga, A je ame kahIe chIe evo zuddha upayoga tIrthakara sivAya koIne hato nahIM ane te tamAre thavAno che. A upayoga zAthI nathI raheto, teya paNa tame jANo cho. upayoga nathI raheto teya tame jANo chone ! eya upayoga che tamAro ! zuddha upayoga e niraMtara rahevo joIe. jeTalo rahyo eTalo kharo, thoDoghaNo ocho thAya bAkI. kAraNa ke phAIlano nikAla to karavAno hoyane ? paNa e zuddha upayoga niraMtara rahevo joIe. A mArga ja zuddha upayogano che ne ! je mArge karma baMdhAya nahIM, e mArga zuddha upayogano kahevAya. karma baMdhAya e zubha upayogano kahevAya. zuddha upayogamAM rahevAnI goThavaNI ! basamAM besIne kyAMka gayA hoya, eTale basamAM zuM karo ? zuM joyA karo ? praznakartA : zuddhAtmA jovAnuM yAda Ave, paNa joDe joDe e kharuM ke basa kevI calAve che. kevI basa che, evuM badhuM joIe.

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zuddha upayoga 233 dAdAzrI : A klinara Avo kevo che ? jo, A loko Ama dhakkA mAre che, lokone Ama kare che. jANe badhAMnA suparavAijhara nA rAkhyA hoya ApaNane ?! ame zuM karatA hoIzuM ? ame upayogamAM ja rahIe, bIjI kaMI bhAMjagaDa ja nahIMne ! praznakartA : Apa upayoga kevI rIte rAkho ? dAdAzrI : bAhya ramaNatA ja nahIMne ! praznakartA : aMdaranI svaramaNatA ApanI kevI hoya, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : e to kharekharI ja hoyane ! emAM kahevA jevuM ja nA hoyane ! svaramaNatA nA thaI paNa svaramaNatA karavI che, e lakSa rahe toya sekanDarI sTepa che. Akho dahADo tame upayoga goThavI rAkho. ahIMthI temane kahyuM, tame jAva. tame daza miniTa bahAra beso toya ApaNuM peluM hatuM tyAMthI pAchuM goThavI devAnuM. tyAMthI pAchuM cAlu thaI jAya. nahIM to valakhAM mAro, Ama DApho mArene ! gADImAM bese to gADImAM DAphAM mAre ! praznakartA : e upayogamAM rahevuM che evuM Akho divasa rahyA kare kharuM, paNa e bAju rahevAya nahIM. dAdAzrI : rahevAya nahIM e vAta judI, paNa lakSamAM rahe che, eTaluMya sAruM kahevAyane. huM zuM karavA Avyo, evuM thayuM mATe taiyArI thaI gaI ! TrenamAM beso to TrenamAMya badhAM pesenjara jeTalA DabAmAM hoya, eTalAnA zuddhAtmA ja joyA karo. e naryo upayoga ja kahevAya. AjJAmAM rahyA e upayoga kahevAya. AkhA DabAnA jeTalA pesenjara che, evI jagyAe besavuM ke ubhA rahevuM ke badhAM pesenjara dekhAya ApaNane, eka phero joI vaLyA eTale pAchAM badhAnA zuddhAtmA joIe. eTale pharI pharI ema karato karato kalAka nIkaLI jAya. eTale ahIM utaravAno vakhata Ave. e upayogapUrvaka gayo vakhata. 238 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAnI vidhio ane zuddha upayoga ! vicAra ApaNane pakaDe nahIMne ! e vicAranI graMthio moTI hoya tyAre pelA ApaNane pakaDI jAya. thoDIvAra pachI ApaNe chUTI jaIe paNa pakaDI le, amAre e graMthio ogaLI gayelI hoya eTale amane niraMtara pakaDe nahIM koI. jo pakaDene to tamArA manamAM ema thAya dAdA kazA mUDamAM nathI evuM lAge. dAdA mUDamAM nathI eTale e jJAnIya na hoya. amArI vidhi karavAnI hoyane, kyAreka mana navaruM paDyuM hoya eTale e vidhi mahIM aMdara cAlu karIe, te vakhate jarAka saheja ema lAge ke A dAdA kazuM kAryamAM haze ! mUDamAM nathI evuM to nA ja jANe koI, kaMI kAryamAM haze, eTaluM kArya ame calAvI laIe, amArI vidhi karavAnI hoyane, te bAkI rahI gaI hoya. bapore badhAM AvI paDyA hoyane, na ja thaI hoya. tyAre ahIM AgaLa navarAza maLe eTale pAchuM eya karI laIe pAchuM. eya zuddha upayoga rUpe ja. praznakartA : Apane thoDo pojha maLe che, hamaNAM A bena AvyAM aMdara, ApaNI vAtacIta cAlu hatI, pachI pUrI thaI eTale dhAro ke vAta kapAI gaI, to te ghaDIe je be miniTa maLe che, pachI navI vAta zarU thAya, e be miniTamAM ApanuM zuM hoya che ? tarata ja kaMIka... dAdAzrI : huM mArA upayogamAM houM. praznakartA : e zuM ? dAdAzrI : upayogamAM amAre mahIM vidhio hau cAlyA kare. A vAto cAle, vidhio cAle, bIjuM cAle, trIjuM cAle, pAchI vidhi kyAM aTakI che te ya khabara hoya ane tamArI joDe vAto karuM, vAto pUrI thAya to vidhi pAchI cAlu hoya. pAchuM tamArI joDe vAto karuM. praznakartA : kAraNa ke Ama eka-be miniTa maLI hoya ne... dAdAzrI : eka miniTa, eka sekanDa maLI hoya toya, e hisAbamAM

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zuddha upayoga 239 240 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ja hoya. jhokuM nA hoya amAre. tamAre ema nA mAnavuM ke game tyAM huM jhokAmAM houM. praznakartA : nA, evuM to hotuM ja nathI ! eTale A be kAma vacce je TAImano avakAza hoya che, tyAre ApanI goThavaNI kaI ? dAdAzrI : te to huM khoLato houM, e to jarA miniTa vadhAre maLe to sAruM, peluM pUruM karI lauM. praznakartA : to amAre kevI goThavaNI karavI joIe, mahAtmAoe ? dAdAzrI : tamAre to A rIta aMdara besADI devAnI. te caMdubhAIne TaiDakAvAya. TeDakAva TeDakAva karavAnA Akho dahADo. mahIM Diprezana nA Ave evuM. enI para nirdaya nahIM thavAnuM, tema dayA paNa nahIM rAkhavAnI. A to dayA rAkhe, 'haya, sUI jA, bA' kaheze. AkhI rAta lAkaDuM thaIne sUI jAya. praznakartA : bIjI kevI vidhionI goThavaNI karAya ? dAdAzrI : hA. karI zakAya. vidhi eTale kaMIka amuka jAtanuM A kArya ATaluM karavuM che, ke je saMsArane levA-devA nA hoya, AtmAne levA devA nA hoya, kArya e vaccenuM eTale phrI jhona. praznakartA : eTale hamaNAM kIdhuM ke avakAzane TAIme caMdubhAIne TaiDakAvavo, to e AtmAne levA-devAvALuM kArya kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e to AtmAne levA-devA. praznakartA : saMsArI pravRtti hoya, e saMsArane levA-devAvALI hoya. dAdAzrI : haM. praznakartA : to have e phrI jhonamAM zuM kahyuM ? dAdAzrI : phrI jhonamAM to mahIM, ahIMnA nahIM ne tyAMnA nahIM. praznakartA to A namaskAra vidhi karIe, trimaMtra bolIe to pachI e AtmapakSanuM thayuM ? dAdAzrI : e je vidhi karene te AtmA mATe nA gaNAya ane A dehane mATe A bAjuye nA gaNAya. praznakartA: to zuM thAya te vakhate ? dAdAzrI : e tamArI jAgRti rahevA mATe karo cho. jhokuM nA Ave eTalA mATe karo cho. e upayogarahita phaLa kahevAya. praznakartA : hA, to e upayoganuM phaLa AtmapakSamAM jAya ? dAdAzrI : e kaMI zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. e upayoga eTale jAgRti ja khAlI. dIvo saLagato rAkhavo eTaluM ja. eTale na pelI bAju gaNAya, nA A bAju gaNAya evuM. praznakartA : ane A TeDakAvuM emAM ? dAdAzrI : TaiDakAvuM e to cokhkhuM tuM A bAju ja thayone ! praznakartA : eTale AtmapakSI ? dAdAzrI : haM. amAre AvI vidhi rahevAnI, be-traNa kalAkanI AkhA divasamAM. nahIM to amAre covIsa kalAka zI rIte kADhavA, zemAM kADhavAnA ? praznakartA : ApanI je vidhi hoya che e peluM phrI jhonanI, AtmApakSanuM ya nahIM ne saMsArapakSanuM ya nahIM evI kaI vidhi ? dAdAzrI : A nava kalamo ne namaskAra vidhi, e badhI amArI vidhi ja bahAra paDelI che. e amAre rojeya bolAtI hoya. praznakartA : e AtmapakSanI thaIne ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : AtmAne zuM levAdevA ? praznakartA : to pachI peluM saMsAra cokhkho kare evI kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : saMsArane zuM levAdevA ?

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zuddha upayoga 241 242 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : to zuM phAyado kare ? dAdAzrI : AtmAne nahIM. ne saMsArane nahIM levA-devA. pelo kaheze, amAre ya levA-devA nahIM. eTale zuM thAya ? nyUTrala thaI gayuM. pelA saMsArane nyuTala karavA mATe A rasto che. ApaNane A lapharuM badhuM tUTI jAya, saMbaMdha tUTI jAya, bahArano. aMdarano saMbaMdha vadhAravAnI jarUra nathI, bahArano choDavAnI jarUra che. praznakartA: eTale vidhimAM ekAkAra hoya, te ghaDIe saMsAra saMbaMdha chUTo paDI jAya che ? dAdAzrI : baMdha hoya. e ja hetu. emAM kALa vadhAre jAya eTale tamAro saMsAra tUTI gayo badho eTalo. chatAMya saMsAranA pakSanuM ya nA kahevAya ane AtmApakSanuM ya nA kahevAya. praznakartA : paNa ApaNe A vidhimAM je bolAya che, dAkhalA tarIke nava kalamo, to saMsAramAM UMdhuM-chatuM je thayuM hoya enA pratipakSI bhAvo AkhA che ne ke bhaI avarNavAda na ho, kaThora bhASA na ho. dAdAzrI : evuM che ne, saMsArane khaseDIe chIe, emAM saMsAranA bhAva nA kahevAya. saMsArane khaseDIe chIe ane AtmA prApta karIe chIe evuM nahIM, saMsArane khaseDAya eTale AtmA ja thaI javAnA cho. tame cho ja AtmA. eTale beu bAjunuM, ekyanuM bhAva nahIM, noTa riyala, noTa rileTiva. praznakartA : have A siddhastuti je bolAya 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ne 'anaMtajJAnavALo chuM', e badhuM zemAM jAya ? dAdAzrI : hA. AtmapakSamAM jAya.paNa te to pelI vidhimAM nA bolavuM joIe. navarAzamAM je vidhi bolAya te to badhuM A nava kalamo, namaskAra vidhi ne e badhuM Ave. pelI caraNavidhi nA hoya, pelI caraNavidhi to tamAre vAMcavAnI dahADe. A bIjI vidhiomAM te UMgheya AvI jAya tamane, toya cAle. UMgha pachI pAcho jAgrata thAya to pelI vidhi pAchI pharI bhegI thAya toya cAle. pelI caraNavidhimAM cAle nahIM, TukaDA nA hoya emAM. praznakartA: to e caraNavidhi kyAre karavI joIe ? dAdAzrI : e to dahADe game tyAre jAgrata sthitimAM. te ghaDIe tamAre ema kahevuM, caMdubhAI, karo caraNavidhi. ane e AtmapakSanA hetu mATenI che, paNa A bIjI badhI vidhio to, namaskAra vidhi, nava kalamo, e koI pakSamAM nahIM. e to A badhA chUTyA AnAthI, AuTa opha saMsAra evo huM chuM, kahe che. tyAre AtmA cho ? tyAre kahe, AtmA to hato ja, emAM mAre zuM pUchavAnuM ?! paNa huM A saMsArathI chUTuM chuM ! praznakartA: nahIM to jo vidhimAM nA rahyA hota to saMsAranA.... dAdAzrI : to bIjAmAM ja pesI jAya. saMsAramAM to cho ja, saMsAranI bahAra nIkaLI zake nahIM. eTale A moTAmAM moTo upAya meM lIdhelo ane keTalAMya vakhatathI amAre cAlyuM Ave che, jJAna thatAM pahelAMthI A che. amAre aMdara tarata ja vidhi cAlu hoya. hA, jyAre ame "Ama" mahIMvALAne namaskAra karIe tyAre vidhi cAlu, "mahIM" zuM hoya, kaMI haze tyAre ne ! praznakartA : mahIM to cauda lokanA nAtha che ! dAdAzrI : hA, paNa te amArI vidhi mahIM cAlu hoya, tArI joDe vAto karatA jaIe, te ghaDIe cAlu hoya badhuM. eTale vAto karavAmAM TAIma nA kADhIe pachI bahu. ame kazIka vidhimAM hoIe, vAto mosTa nesesiTI hoya tyAre vAta karIe, te ghaDIe vidhi baMdha rAkhIe ne kAma laIe. praznakartA : bemAM mukhya kayuM kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : mukhya ekeya nahIM. je vakhate je bane e kharuM. vidhi karatAMya jJAtA-draSTApaNuM praznakartAH have vidhi cAlatI hoya, enA paNa jJAtA-draSTA hoyane?

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zudgha upayoga dAdAzrI : hA, e pAchuM kharuM ne ! jJAtA-draSTA vagaranI vidhi nA hoya amArI. upayogapUrvaka eTale bhUlacUka thaI hoya, e to pachI khyAlamAM ja hoya. mahIM koIno phoTo hoya ne, te phoTo hau ekajhekTa moDhuM dekhAya. 'namo arihaMtANaM' bolIe eTale arihaMta dekhAya amane. 243 praznakartA : navarA beThA 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' athavA to caraNividha vAMca vAMca karuM chuM, to e upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA. e caraNividha eTalI badhI moMDhe karI nAkhavI joIe ke basa, Ama beThAM beThAM pachI vAMcIe to AMkha baMdha karIne vagara copaDIe zabde zabda vaMcAya Ama enA jevuM UMcuM koI jJAtA-Aya che ja nahIM ! te zuddha upayoga kahevAya ! caraNavidhi moMDhe bolavI ane joDe joDe ene vAMcavI e badhuM zuddha upayoga ! praznakartA : A jANavA maLyuM ene vAMcavI e bahu sArI vAta che. dAdAzrI : hA. e zeya che ne ApaNe jJAtA chIe. ame Ama ja, ahIM Akho dahADo besI rahIe chIe tyAre bolo, zAmAM upayoga rAkhavAno ? ahIM to ko'ka dahADo gharAkI nAye hoya. bilakuleya gharAkI nA hoya tyAre ? gharAkI hoya tyAre gharAkImAM, jo gharAkI nA hoya tyAre upayoga zemAM rAkhavAno ? tyAre kahe, upayoga amArA badhA bahu jAtanA hoya, e badhAya zuddha upayoga hoya. kAraNa ke zubha to amArI pAse hoya nahIM. zubha to tamArI pAseya nA hoya. tame to badhAMya zuddha upayogavALA cho paNa tamane zuddha upayogano vepAra karatAM pUruM phAve nahIM. eTale keTaluMka che te gharAka ema ne ema pAchAM jatAM rahe. tamane naphoya maLe nahIM ne ene gharAkane pAchuM javuM paDe. ane amane gharAka badhuM ApIne jAya. praznakartA : Apano vizeSa karIne zemAM upayoga rahe ? dAdAzrI : e to badho zuddha upayoga ja rahevAno amAro. kazuM nA hoya to goThavaNI karI daIe. AvuM kazuMka, koI navavuM paDyuM ke goThavaNI AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) karI daIe. jJAtA-zeyano saMbaMdha navaro paDavA Avyo ane jJeya dekhAtuM baMdha thAya to AtmAne navaro mUkAya nahIM. kAraNa ke jJAyaka e to pAchuM kAyamanuM ajavALuM kahevAya. emAM zeya jhaLakavuM ja joIe. jJeya jhaLake nahIM tyAM sudhI zuddha upayoga kahevAya nahIM. eTale AvuM game tyAM mUkI daIe ame, haDahaDATa mUkI daIe. eTale kalAka-doDha kalAka cAle ane pachI A badhAM loka kahe, 'tame zuM karo cho ?" tyAre ame kahIe ke ame vidhi karIe chIe. amAre roja be-aDhI kalAkanI vidhi hoya AvI. e vidhi rAte bAra vAgyA sudhI karavI ja paDe. divasamAMya vidhi karavI ja joIe. 244 bhIDamAM vidhi nA thaI hoya, bahu gharAkI hoya to rAte bAra-eka vAge thAya. kAraNa ke gharAkI to Aje Ave ne kAle nA Ave, to ApaNuM peluM cUkI jaIe. eTale pelo hisAba to cokkasa goThavelo ja rAkhavAno. ajJAtIneya helpa kare A vidhio ! praznakartA : have jJAna nA lIdhuM hoya ane e paNa A nava kalamo che, trimaMtra che, evA badhAmAM Akho dahADo rahyA karatA hoya, to eno saMsAra khase che ? dAdAzrI : enuM to pelI rIte phAyado thAya. praznakartA : eTale ene puNyano lAbha maLe ? dAdAzrI : nA, puNyano lAbha nahIM. eno ahaMkAra zuddha thato jAya. praznakartA : eTale ene A vidhio zuddha thavAmAM helpa kare kharI, ajJAnIne ? dAdAzrI : hA, e to zuddha ja kare ne, ene ! praznakartA : nahIM to saMsAramAM rahyo eTale krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha rahyA kahevAya.ane A vidhimAM rahyo eTale peluM krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha nA kahevAya. dAdAzrI : ahaMkAra zuddha karene, kaSAyo ochA karene !

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zuddha upayoga 245 246 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : thAya. goThavaNIpUrvaka hoya tyAM na hoya miketikla ! praznakartA : ame A badhI vidhio karIe A saraplasa TAImamAM, to amAre Ama mikenikala jevuM thaI jAya che. Ama upayoga kazuM nahIM. dAdAzrI : mikenikala thAya to pachI e vidhio ja nA kahevAyane ! praznakartA : e mikenikala na thavA mATe zuM hovuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : e mikenikala tamAruM thaI jAya toya paNa e mikenikala ApaNe kahevuM nA joIe, thaI jAya toya. pachI nahIM to mikenikala ja thaI jaze. praznakartA : ApaNe zuM kahevuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe evuM samajI javuM joIe, ke ahIM kacAza che. to e kacAza pUrI thaI jAya. praznakartA : ane e kevI hovI joIe ? dAdAzrI : pUrNa jAgRtipUrvaka dekhAvuM joIe. A huM kahuM chuM ne, lokone ke rAte dhyAna karIne sUI jajo. te lokonA manamAM ema thAya ke ekjhakTa moTuM dekhAtuM nathI. ekjhakTa moTuM dekhAtuM nathI, evuM hovuM joIe paNa e kaMI mikenikala nA kahevAya. eno TrAya che. mikenikala to ApaNo TrAya nA hoya enuM nAma mikenikala. praznakartA : saraplasa TAImamAM A vidhio zarU thAya che, e paNa pelI goThavaNI karI che tyAre ja thAya che ne ? eTale e mikenikala to nA ja gaNAya. dAdAzrI : hA, eTale goThavaNI karelI che ne ! e jo goThavaNI ApaNe nA karIe to pachI thAya ja zI rIte ? goThavaNI karIe eTale e jAgRtipUrvaka thAya eTale pachI e mikenikala nA kahevAya. emAM dasa TakAya jAgRtipUrvaka thAyane ? dAdAzrI : to nevuM TakA ajAgRti e pachI mikenikala nA kahevAya. mikenikala to enI meLe thayA kare. A badhuM hareka kArya kare che ne A jagatanA loko, e badhuM mikenikala kahevAya. jemAM bhAva nAmanoya nathI. praznakartA : eTale A vidhi thatI hoya, ene mikenikala nathI evuM mAnavAnuM cAlu kare, to.... dAdAzrI : mikenikala thAya ja nahIM, mikenikala kevI rIte thAya ? mikenikala to konuM nAma kahevAya ke ApaNI emAM kaMI paNa Dakho-Dakhala nA hoya. A phorenavALA badhA jIve che e badhuM mikenikala lAIpha. e potAnI DakhoDakhala nahIM. praznakartA : A vidhi mikenikala thAya enI vAta... dAdAzrI : mikenikala nA bolAya. mikenikala kahevAya nahIM. mikenikala bolavuM e badhuM moTuM jokhama kahevAya. praznakartA : e kharekhara mikenikala nathI hotI. dAdAzrI : mikenikala zabda ja nA hoya ne ! praznakartA : eTale eka bAju vidhi cAle ane dhyAna bIjI bAju hoya. vidhi eka bAju cAlatI hoya aMdara, paNa dhyAna Ama cAre bAju phAMphA mAratuM hoya ne evuM badhuM hoya Ama. dAdAzrI : e to mahIM khUce kharuM ne paNa ? praznakartA : kheMce. dAdAzrI : e khUMce to mikenikala nA kahevAya. khUMcatuM nA hoya tyAre mikenikala kahevAya, teya ekkekTa mikenikala nA kahevAya. hetu nathIne evo mikenikalano. mikenikala e judI vastu che.

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zudgha upayoga 247 sAmAyika-pratikramaNa rAkhe zuddha upayogamAM ! praznakartA : A je saraplasa TAImamAM eka sAmAyika evI rIte karavAnI ke caMdubhAI savArathI zuM karato hato e badhuM jovuM, to pachI evI rIte ApaNe A joyuM, e zemAM jAya ? emAM pachI badhA pelA doSo paNa dekhAya, e doSo jovAnI prakriyA, pratikramaNa karavAnI kriyA.... dAdAzrI : hA, e badhuM AtmAmAM jAya. praznakartA : e zuddha upayoga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA. AtmA pakSamAM jAya eTale pachI zuddha upayoga. zuddha upayoga ane AtmAmAM rahevuM emAM phera eTalo ja ke peluM upayogapUrvaka che upayoga. zuddha upayoga eTale pelo sAmo mANasa dhola mAre to zuddha ya e zuddha AtmA che evuM ApaNane nA javuM joIe. praznakartA H ane AtmAmAM rahevuM eTale ? dAdAzrI : AtmAmAM rahevuM eTale A hamaNe vAta karI, te AtmAmAM rahevuM kahevAya. praznakartA : eTale A badhuM aMdara AMkho baMdha karIne badhuM doSo jotA hoya, e badhuM. dAdAzrI : e badhuM AtmAmAM rahevAnuM. ane pelo upayoga kahevAya. e chello upayoga. dhola mAranAra koNa, kone mAre che, huM koNa A badhuM zuM che, e badhuM khyAlamAM rahe, e zuddha upayoga. mAranArano doSa, kono doSa che ? koNa mAre che ? kone mAre che, teya tAre jANavuM paDe. praznakartA : ene chello upayoga kIdho. dAdAzrI : huM. praznakartA H to Avo upayoga varte eTale te ghaDIe AtmAmAM varSo ja kahevAya ne ? 248 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : e vAta ja judIne ! enI to vAta ja judI. A bhAIno rivAja bahu sAro, kaMIka AvyuM ke 'mAruM nhoya' ema karIne chUTuM. praznakartA : paNa te ghaDIe 'huM koNa' evI paNa jAgRti rAkhavI paDe ? dAdAzrI : e jAgRti hoya ja. mAruM nahIM kahenAra, te vakhate A jAgRtimAM hoya. 'mAruM nhoya' ema kaho toya e jAgRti. kAraNa ke ApaNe zuM tAruM ne zuM tAruM hoya, e ApaNane jAgRti ApI. kAramAM zuddha upayogatI goThavaNI ! koI mANasa amArI AjJA pramANe bAra kalAka rahe, tenuM zuM phaLa maLe ? praznakartA : ekadama samAdhimAM rahe. dAdAzrI : e vAta ja judI hoya. keTaluM saraLa che, IjhI che paNa rahe che ? nA rahIe to bahu kacAza kahevAya ! zuddha upayogamAM ja mANase rahevuM joIe badhe. kAma hoya eTaluM kAma karIne pachI zuddha upayoga ! be kalAka upayogamAM rahyA, te ghaDIe zuM phAyado thAya ? praznakartA : mahAvIra jevI dazA rahe. dAdAzrI : have AvuM saraLa koI dahADo utpanna thayuM nathI tyAre loka saraLatAno lAbha letA nathI. zuM thAya te ? keTaluM saraLa che ?! tame gADImAM mArI joDe beThAM hatA, te ghaDIe vAtacIta nA kare to nA cAle ? Ama badhuM zuddha upayogathI darzana karatAM karatAM jatAM hoya, paNa evo draDha nizcaya nathI. evuM kazuM nathIne ! te ghera jaIne gAMTha vALe ane Ama jo kadI upayoga bahAra jAyane to pratikramaNa kare. nahIM to A sthiti hoya ?! A to kAma kADhI nAkhe evI sthiti che. upayoga bahAra gayo ke pratikramaNa kare ! ApaNe tyAM kazuM pUchavA jevuM rAkhyuM ja nathI. eNe AzA ja

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250 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) zuddha upayoga 249 pALavAnI che. e pote kare ne to karma baMdhAya. amArI AjJA che, mATe ene kartApadanuM karma nA baMdhAya. kAraNa ke AjJApUrvaka kare che. vakhate A DrAIvIMga ApaNe jAte karatA hoya to lokonAmAM Ama zuddhAtmA nA jovAya. riyala-rileTiva nA jovAya. te ghaDIe to eNe pote dhyAna ja rAkhavuM joIe. paNa gADImAM beThelA mANasoe upayogamAM rahevuM joIene ! praznakartA : mAre gADI calAvatA paNa joI zakAya. dAdAzrI : nA, vakhate kAcuM paDI jAya, bAkI kharI rIte joI zakAya. are, keTalAMka DrAyavaroe mane ema kaheluM ke dAdA, huM to joyA karuM chuM. AgaLa khADo Avyo, phalANuM AvyuM che ane A phAIla naMbara eka DrAIvIMga karyA kare che. DrAIvaro zuddha upayogamAM sarasa rahe che. have Avaze mokSa sAmo ! zuddha upayoga rahevo joIe phakta. jeTalo bane eTalo, ejha phAra ejha posIbala. ene mATe rAte pachI ciMtA nahIM karavAnI, sUI javAnuM nirAMte. eTale mAruM kahevAnuM ke evuM ujAgaro kaMI karavAnuM nahIM. paNa jarA puruSArtha ApaNe puruSa thayelA chIe eTale vadhu rAkhavo che, evo nirNayanizcaya hovo joIe ke mAre have zuddha upayoga rAkhavo ja che. pachI nA rahyo eTaluM nikAlI bAbata. ane ApaNe kaMI utAvaLa karavAnI jarUra nathI, raghavAyA thavAnI jarUra nathI, mokSa sAmo Avaze. ApaNe tyAM javAnI jarUra nathI. gADImAM beThelA mANasane sTezana enI meLe ja Avaze, vaDodarA. tuM tArI jagyAe ja besI raheje. praznakartA : gADImAM besI ja gayA chIene, ame to have. dAdAzrI : hA, eTale ja to kahuM chuMne, mAruM kahevAnuM e che ke e A AvyA karaze. A AjJA pALavAnI che, bIjuM kazuM, mokSanI ciMtA ApaNe karavAnI jarUra ja nathI. A AjJAnI TikiTa evI che ke tyAM ja laI jaze. praznakartA : AjJA samajavAnI che, dAdA. dAdAzrI : hA, e badhuM samajavAnuM to kharuMne ! samajavAnI ja to jarUra che. samajyA ja chene, ghaNAkharA samajyA che. paNa mahIM keTalAkane kacAza hoya samajavAmAM. ta mUkAya eka kSaNa vIlo AtmAte ! pacIsa varSanI choDI hoya, to atyAre ene chokaro hoya ke nA hoya ? praznakartA : hoya ja. dAdAzrI : to pachI e chokarAne vIlo mUke ? praznakartA : na mUke. dAdAzrI : nhAvA jAya eTale chUTo to mUkavo paDe, paNa vIlo nA mUke. ene khyAlamAM ja hoya ke e raDato haze, ene TADha vAtI haze ? ke zuM thatuM haze ? zuM karato haze ? e Ama karato haze. evI rIte AtmA vIlo mUkavAno nathI. kAraNa ke A duniyAmAM jo vIlo nA mukato hoya to, e chokarI enA chokarAne vIlo nA mUke. nahAtI vakhate, khAtI vakhate paNa vIlo nA mUke. A chokaro raDyo, e Ama thayuM, e Agho thayo, e paDavAno thayo. praznakartA : eTale prakRti zuM zuM kare che e jovAnuM ? dAdAzrI : e jovAnuM to kharuM ja, paNa ghaNIpherA to pote prakRtimAM ja hoya che. Akho dA'Do prakRtimAM ja hoya che. eTale te vakhate zuM karavuM paDe ? chokarAnuM dhyAna rAkhe evI rIte AtmAnuM dhyAna rAkhavuM paDe. evI rIte AtmAne vIlo nathI mUkavAno. praznakartA : e to dAdA, pelI dhaNIne soMpIne gaI hoyane toya vIlo nA rAkhe. dAdAzrI : toya e kaheze, A babUcaka che. enuM ThekANuM nathI !

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zuddha upayoga 251 2para AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : eno jIva tyAM chokarAmAM ja hoya. dAdAzrI : evuM joIe ! ame kSaNavAra AtmAne vIlo nathI mUkavA dIdho. A jJAna thatAM pahelAM chellAM be-pAMca varSamAM vIlo nathI mUkavA dIdho, tethI ja meM chokarIno dAkhalo Apyo ke vIlo mUke ? pUchI joje koI chokarIne ke vIlo mUke che ? nahIM to tame jAte chokarI ho to kevuM mUko te tapAsa karo to tamane khabara paDaze ke vIlo nA mUke ! praznakartA: e to koI paNa mAtAnI ceSTAmAM joIe to tarata ja khabara paDI jAya. dAdAzrI : mATe evI rIte AtmAne vIlo mUkavAno nathI. tyAre emAM agharuM zuM che ? pelI A keTalAMya chokarAM thAya che, ene vIlA mUkatI nathI toya enuM inAma moTuM maLatuM nathI. to A to moTuM inAma maLavAnuM. A to mokSarUpI phaLa maLavAnuM. eTale eka avatAra AtmAne vIlo nA mUkIe. praznakartA : dAdAjI, A je mA chokarAnuM dhyAna rAkhe che to enI surakSAnuM dhyAna rAkhe ke kyAMka vAgI nA jAya, kyAMka dAjhI na jAya. kyAMka khoTuM karI na bese, te AtmAmAM evuM zuM dhyAna rAkhavAnuM ApaNe ? dAdAzrI : e Ama nA thAya, Ama nA thAya, evI rIte paNa chokarAMnuM dhyAna rAkhe chene, evuM AtmAnuM dhyAna rAkhavAnuM. AtmAne dAjhI javAnuM to che ja nahIM. AtmAnuM ja dhyAna eTale AtmAnI jAgRti che. evI rahevI joIe, cUkavuM nA joIe koI paNa prayogamAM. praznakartA : dAdA, pelAmAM to mAnAM lakSamAM hoya che, chokarAMnI eka vastu judI paNa ahIMyA amane badhAne evuM lakSamAM hotuM nathI, ke AtmA kyAM cUkI javAya che ? AtmAnuM dhyAna ame kyAM nathI rAkhatA ? kyAM slIpa thaIe chIe ? to e kaho to khyAlamAM rahe. dAdAzrI : A chokarAMnuM jema rAkhIe chIene evI rIte A rAkhavAnI jarUra che. vIlo nA mUkavo joIe ane zAthI e thaI jAya che? e tamane bIjAM lapakAM khAvAnI Teva paDelI che eTale. A joIe ne te joIe ne badhI bhautika icchAo. icchAo kazI hovI ja nA joIene ? A badhI icchAo baMdha thaI gaI, je Ave te kharuM, ema karIne rahevuM. praznakartA : eTale bIjAmAM tanmayAkAra thaIe tyAre AtmA vIlo mUkyo kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : vIlo mUkyo ja ne, tyAre zuM? paNa bIjI icchAo evuM hovuM ja nA joIene ! je prApta thAya e bhogavo. mAruM kahevAnuM che ke ahIM beThAM beThAM AiskrIma khAvane, huM kyAM nA pADuM chuM ! paNa pAchuM bIjI ne trIjI mAMga mAMga kare e khoTuM ! paNa tArA hAthamAM AveluM choDe nahIMne pachI ! ane AtmA lakSamAM raheto hoya to badhI evI daza DIzo khAvane !! paNa AtmA lakSamAM raheto nathI ne pachI Dizo khAva e kema posAya te ? praznakartA : dAdA, A kiMmata nahIM samajAI hoya eTale dhyAna nathI rahetuM ! atyAre dhyAna kema nathI rahetuM ? dAdAzrI : kiMmata samajAI hoya to pachI ApaNe hIro jyAM mUkyo hoya tyAMne tyAM citta hoyane ApaNuM. e abaja rUpiyAno hIro Ama AghopAcho thaI gayo hoya toya pAcho jovA Ave ane pAMcaso rUpiyAno hoya to ! evuM kiMmata tamane samajAI che, paNa A pahelAMnI Adato jAya nahIM. paugalika Adato kharIne ! phAIlane nahAvuM-dhovuM paDe, kAM to nokarI nA karavI paDe ? nokarI karatI vakhate ya AtmAne vIlo nahIM mUkavAno. praznakartA : eTale 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' lakSa rahevuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : hA. e cUkavuM nA joIe. ApaNe A je nokarI karIe chIene, to ApaNe AtmA ja chIe e bhAna cUkavuM nA joIe. vIlo. nA mUkAya. praznakartA : eTale dAdA pAsethI ApaNe jaIe tyAre dAdAne chUTA

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zuddha upayoga mUkIe chIe paNa vIlA nathI mUkatA ApaNe. dAdAzrI : hA. e to enI meLe kudaratI rIte rahe che tamane badhAMne. vIlo nathI mUkatA. eTaluM yAda rahe che. e rahe che kahevAya. peluM rAkhavuM paDe che. 253 praznakartA : dAdA pratyakSa che eTale yAda rahe che. paNa jJAna ApyA pachI 'huM AtmA chuM' e yAda rahevuM joIene ? dAdAzrI : 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e to lakSamAM hoya ja. jo nagInabhAI hoya te e potAnI jAtane jANato ja hoya ke nagInabhAI to chuM. eTale . ja kaMI nagInabhAI yAda rAkhavAnI jarUra nA hoya. che enI yAdagIrI zI ? che ja. praznakartA : to pachI A vIlo mUkavAno prazna ja nA Avene ? dAdAzrI : hA. paNa ApaNe je nathI ene che mAnyo'to atyAra sudhI ane che ene nathI mAnyo'to eTale A pheraphAra thavAthI ene ApaNe rAkhavAno che. praznakartA : eTale eno artha e thayo ke pelo jUno adhyAsa pAcho vacce Ave che ? dAdAzrI : te e ja vacce Ave chene tyAre ! ene lIdhe vIlo mUkAI jAya che. ane pAchuM A malTiplikezanavALuM che. eka dA'Do jo sAcavIne rAkho, to be dA'DAnI zakti utpanna thaI jAya. be dA'DA rAkho to cAra dA'DAnI zakti utpanna thAya. e sAcavIe nahIM to lIka thayA ja karene badhuM ! zuddha upayoga, ekjhekTanesamAM... A to zuM kahe che ? mane upayoga sarasa rahe che. eTale upayogane halakI kakSAnuM karI nAkhyuMne ? praznakartA : dAdA, kanTinyuasa nahIM. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : nA, e kanTinyuasa to nahIM, paNa miniTeya nahIM. upayoga e vastu judI che. e to dhyAna rahyuM kahevAya. upayoga jenA hAthamAM Avyo, te to AtmajJAnI thaI gayo kahevAya. A to tamArI kakSAno upayoga rAkho ema kahIe chIe. eya jAgRti rahene potAne. 254 tAre upayoga rahyo hato ? ene upayoga kahevAya nahIMne ! e tamArI kakSAmAM tame mAno. tArI kakSA judI, enI kakSA judI. badhAnI kakSA judI judI. paNa e kakSAno rahe to sAruM. paNa bahu evuM samajI nA levuM ke A mane kharekhara upayoga rahe che. nahIM to pachI upayogamAM javAze nahIM AgaLa. tuM kahuM ke mane kAle Akho divasa upayoga rahyo sAro. tuM kahuM to sAMbhaLuM nahIM. huM jANuM ke zeneya upayoga kaheto haze A ? zene kaheto haze ? praznakartA : A jAgRti rahe, dhyAna dAdAnuM rahe, dAdAe vAta kahI te yAda rahe tene upayoga kahe. dAdAzrI : hA, te ja kahuM chuM. e to dhAraNa karyuM eTaluM. dhAraNa karavAnI zakti utpanna thaI. ene upayoga mAnI nA lezo. e to sahu sahune gajA pramANeno upayoga hoya. praznakartA : hA, je daraasala upayoga che, e pAcho judo che !! dAdAzrI : ene samajAyuM haze, huM zuM kahevA mAguM chuM te ? praznakartA : A evuM samajAyuM haze ke je huM mAnuM chuM, emAM bhUla che. upayoga judI vastu che. dAdAzrI : e to dhAraNa karelI vastu lakSamAM AvI e. eka vakhata to dhAraNa karavAnI zaktio nathI ne tamArAmAM ! dhAraNa karavAnI zakti eTale to jeTaluM huM boluM eTaluM badhuM dhAraNa thaI jAya te pachI jAya nahIM, AghupAchuM nA thAya. sahu sahunI bhASAno upayoga mAnI beThAM che. mULa

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zuddha upayoga 255 256 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) upayoga nA hoyane e, teya huM cAlavA dauM. tema chaNAvaTa nA karuM AvuM. paNa eNe jyAre ema kahevA mAMDyuM ke have A to upayoga mane rahyo. eTale meM kahyuM thaI rahyuM have to, A upayogano artha avaLo thavA mAMDyo. dAdAjInAM zabdo kahelAM, tenuM lakSa rAkhuM e badhI jAgRti. e caDhatI jAya jAgRti. paNa ene upayoga nA kahevAya. kAle jAgRti sArI rahI, ema kahevAya. paNa ene kaMI mULa vastu, upayoga nA kahevAya. praznakartA : eTale mULa jagyAe haju upayoga beTho nathI ? dAdAzrI : mULa jagyAe vastu bhegI thavI muzkela che. e to lakSa beThuM che eTaluM ja e. eno anubhava thayA vagara to upayoga kema utpanna thAya ? 'A huM chuM' enuM pramANa saheje badalAvuM nA joIe, enA anaMta pradezo sahita ! haju to mahIM mAnyatAmAM bhUle ya thAya vakhate. A AtmA haze ke pelo haze ? thoDuM thoDuM mahIM bhUlacUka thAya, bheLaseLa thaI jAya. praznakartA ane pAchI pelI asaro mahIM thAya che tyAM sudhI to bhUla kharI ja ne ? dAdAzrI : haMa. eTale e mULa vastu judI che. mULa vastu anaMtA pradezo sahita bilakula cokhkhI, kliyara che ane te pramANe ja hoya. tyAra pachI upayoga kharo thAya, zuddha upayoga. tyAM sudhIno zuddha upayoga che, e aMze thoDoka, A haju e ahIM Avelo joI zake ane AjubAjunA sarkalamAM Avelo joI zake. e jAgRti kahevAya badhI. paNa tadana zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. zuddha upayoga to bahu UMcI vastu. chatAM ene upayoga kahe, zuddha upayoga kayA AdhAra para draSTi che, e jAgRtinA hisAbe kahIe ApaNe, cAlavA daIe, paNa evuM loka eksepTa nahIM kare. ame to enkareja mATe cAlavA daIe. paNa e bolyo eTale pachI ame enkarejamenTa nA ApyuM. meM kahyuM, 'avaLuM thaze A to'. ene dhAraNa rahyuM eTaluM to sAruM rahyuM. dhAraNa ja rahetuM nathIne ! ame bolelA e jAgRti rahe nahIMne pAchI. pharI badhI pachI visAre paDI jAya. tane keTalI jAgRti rahe che, ame bolelA tenI ? amAruM vacanabaLa che paNa tArI jAgRti keTalI che ? koIne enkarejamenTa mATe kahIe paNa pachI eno artha evo nahIM ke tyAM besI rahene pachI ene pUruM thAya ! ane ene to enkarejamenTa mATeya nA kahevAya upayoga. A upayoga ja joyane ! eTale haju enI dhAraNazaktiye jeTaluM bole eTaluM dhAraNa rahe, e zakti ke khIlelI nathI. enI thoDI thoDI zakti khIlaze Ama ahIM paDI rahe. paDyo pAtharyo rahe eTale e khIle. paNa e upayoga nA kahevAya. jAgRti kahevAya ene. e jAgRti ane sArI rahe che. chatAM ahIM paDI raheze to ko'ka dahADo lAbha thaze. e badhI jAgRti rahene ! Ama jotAMnI sAthe badhuM Ama phoDa dekhADe che tyAM sudhI zuddha upayoga nA kahevAyane ! e jAgRti kahevAya. bhakti konI ? jaDatI ke cetatatI ? praznakartA have A je jAgRti che, vyavahAramAM e jAgRti AkhI AvarAI jAya badhI. kaMI prasaMga AvI paDe, te vakhate je tanmayAkAra pariNAma kahIene, tevuM thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : mazInanuM kAma karavAmAM to AtmA ja jato rahe. kAraNa ke mazInarInI bhakti kahevAya. mazInarI haMmezAM bhakti mAge, tanmayAkAra bhakti. nahIM to mazInarIno eka naTa phITa nA thAya. tethI ame mazInarIne nAnapaNamAMthI ja aDatA na hatA. sAyakalane pazcara paDyuM hoya teya huM bahAra karAvI leto hato. emAM mAruM dhyAna jAya to mAruM badhuM bagaDI jAya. naTeya pheravato na hato. mane AvaDatuM nathI, evuM kahI dauM. paisA ApIne karAvI laIe ApaNe. haju eka bAju mazInarI ripera karuM chuM te ghaDIe zuM thAya che eka kalAka ? AtmA emAM ja rahe pachI, nahIM ? kAraNa ke bhakti kahevAya che ene praznakartA : mAruM kevuM hoya che ke Akho vakhata ApanI ja sevAmAM houM eTale AtmA yAda nA Ave, AzA yAda nA Ave...

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zuddha upayoga 257 dAdAzrI : nA. e to A tamAre yAda nA rahe to vAMdho nahIM. A dAdAnI sevA to, A to gajabanI vastu kahevAya. ene AtmA yAda rAkhavAnI jarUra ja nathI. praznakartA : dAdA ja yAda rahe te vakhate pachI. dAdAzrI : paNa bhakti zenI thAya che e jovAnI jarUra che. AtmA yAda rahe ke nA rahe, e to meM lakSa ApeluM che, eTale tamane jyAre tyAre lakSa AvIne UbhuM raheze, paNa e che te bhakti konI che e jovAnuM. jenI bhakti karone, te rUpa thayA kare. praznakartA : to to bahu UMcuM ja che, dAdA. dAdAzrI : hA, te UMcuM che tethI kahuM chuMne A badhAne ke bhaI, A UMcuM tamane maLI AvyuM che. tamArI puNya jAgI che. puNye ko'kanI jAgene ? huM sevA ApuM evo mANasa nathI. sevA ApuM evo kAco mANasa, bilakuleya nahIM. paga bhAMgyone A nIrubahenane sevA ApavAnuM banyuM. nahIM to huM ApuM nahIM. koInIya sevA meM jiMdagImAM nathI lIdhI. ane tuM to mazInanI bhakti karuM chuM. jenI bhakti karuM te rUpa thAya. zrutajJAnanI bhaktithI jAgRti ekadama thaI ane ajavALuM thaI gayuM. A mazInanI bhaktithI ajavALuM pAchuM baMdha thaI jAya. bhakti zAnI kare che e jovAnuM. AtmAno svabhAva jenI bhakti karene, tevo thaI jAya. tethI kahuMne, nIrubenanI puNya bahu ja moTI jAgI che. evuM kahuM chuM te lokone zAthI kahuM chuM ? nahIM to kahuMye nahIMne lokone ! praznakartA : dAdA, maneya Aje vadhAre samajAI e puchyuM ! dAdAzrI : tane samajAya che ? jokhama zemAM che ne jokhama zemAM nathI evuM. zenI bhakti karI tethI A ajavALuM thaI gayuM ? jevo ciMtavene AtmA tevo thaI jAya. AtmAnuM mULa lakSaNa e ke jevuM ciMtave, jenI bhakti kare te rUpa thAya. tethI badhAMne kahuM chuMne ke jJAnI pAse paDI rahevAnuM. paNa kema javA daIe chIe ? phAIlo che eTale phAIlono nikAla to karavo ja paDe. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ane 'Amane' jo Ama bIjI jAgRti rahetI na hoyane toya huM dhyAna nA ApuM, enuM zuM kAraNa ? ke kharuM kAraNa to sevAI rahyuM che. AvuM jJAnInI bhakti-sevA maLe nahIMne A kAraNa ja nA maLe ! 258 AtmAno mukhya guNa. AjubAjunuM jevuM sarkala A dekhyuM ke te rUpa thaI jAya. jenI bhakti kare te rUpa thaI jAya. hamaNe rasa-roTalInI bhakti kare to rasa-roTalI jevo thaI jAya. praznakartA : AvatA bhava mATe te vakhate navuM cArja thAya ? dAdAzrI : navuM cArja nA thAya. enI upara AvaraNa AvI jAya. navuM cArja tuM kartA thauM to thAya ane nahIM to AvaraNa Ave badhuM. A AvaraNa lAve, te pachI dekhAtuM baMdha thaI jAya ane nirAvaraNa thayuM te peluM zrutajJAnanI bhaktithI thayuM. ATalAM varSanI zrutajJAnanI bhakti karI ethI nirAvaraNa thayuM. jhabakAro pachI mAre ! mazInarI to pote ja mazInarI bhakti mAMge. sivila(injiniyariMga) mAM mazInarI nA hoya. sivilamAM to vicAravAnuM hoyane A badhuM, ene jovAnuM ne jANavAnuM e vadhAre rahe. praznakartA : emAMya thoDuMka to Avene, dAdA. dAdAzrI : Ave to kharuM badhuMya. nukasAnakAraka che badhuMya. saMsArIbhAva jyAM Avyo te badhuMya nukasAnakAraka. kartAbhAvathI karma baMdhAya. tuM mazInarI ripera karuM te ghaDIe kartAbhAva utpanna thato nathI. eTale e karma baMdhAya nahIM, paNa A AnAthI AvaraNa Ave. aMdhAruM ghora karI nAkhe eka phero. AvuM badhuM thatuM hoya, teya prayoga baMdha thaI jAya badhAM. kema karIne koI kAma thAya ? bIjuM kAma ja kevI rIte thAya A ? ane A ajavALuM thaI gayuM, ene AvaraNa ja Ave. chatAMya karavuM paDe to mazInarI nA hovI joIe, bIjuM badhuM hoya to cAle. e pharajiyAta karavuM paDe. hisAba to goThavelo hoya, te zuM kare ? joyuM zrutajJAnanuM phaLa kevuM maLyuM che ?!

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zudgha upayoga 259 praznakartA : bahu suMdara ! dAdAzrI : mahIM cokhkhuM, bIjuM kazI icchAo nahIM badhI bahu ne zrutajJAna bheguM thayuM. praznakartA : e to mukhya kAraNane, dAdA. saMjogo badhA maLI AvyA. dAdAzrI : vyavahAra vasamo chene paNa. e mikenikala thato hato tyAMthI ja samajI gayo hato ke Ano vyavahAra barobara sAro nA kahevAya. khuzeya thAya ke meM kevuM sarasa mazIna goThavI dIdhuM. eTale mahIM chUpo kartAbhAva rahe. mazIna goThavyA pachI khuza nA thAya mANasa ? praznakartA : thAyane, dAdA. dAdAzrI : e cAlu nathI thatuM to pAcho TADho paDI jAya. Ama garvarasa chene haju. eTale A bahu jhINI bAbato Amane lakSamAM nA Ave. ene to rAta-dahADo satsaMgamAM paDI rahe to kAma heMDe. akrama jJAna eTale enuM ArAdhana paddhatisara hovuM joIe. chatAMya A jAgRti, enI A je svarUpanI jAgRti e hisAbe to ene upayoga kahevAya. ame upayoga kahIe ene. have e upayoga mazInarInuM A kAma AvyuM e kAma tenI sAthe ja upayoga rahe to e kAma kADhI nAkhe. paNa mazInarIno svabhAva ja evo che e upayoga rahevA ja nA de. kAraNa ke zarUAta jaDabhaktithI thaIne ! praznakartA : A jamatI vakhateya AkhI jaDabhakti ja hoya chene ? dAdAzrI : nA. e to e upayoga rAkhanArA amuka mANasone bahu sarasa rahe che. paNa sAmAnyapaNe khAtI vakhate caMcaLa sthiti thaI jAya, eTale upayoga rahe nahIM jaladI. mazInarI riperamAM be-traNa kalAka thAya to zuM thAya ? AkhI jAgRti UDI jAya. have enI bhakti maTe, to ripera thAya nahIM. praznakartA H bhakti to karavI ja paDe, te vakhate. dAdAzrI : enI bhakti maTe ke ripera baMdha thaI jAya. eTale ame AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) paisA gaNavAnI bAbatamAM dhyAna nathI ApatA. A tamane kahyuM, enA uparathI evuM samajI javAnuMne ! mAro upayoga badho dhovAI jAya e paisA gaNavAmAM be kalAka jAya to ! A dehamAM dhyAna nathI rAkhyuM meM, be-traNa miniTathI vadhAre. dAktaro kahe che, tame dhyAna rAkho to vaheluM maTI jAya. meM kahyuM, dhyAna rAkhuM to mAruM zuM thAya ? A jagyAe dukhatuM hoya to huM dhyAna mUkuM to vaheluM maTI jAya, tarata maTI jAya. dhyAna mUke eTale upayoga tyAM gayo eTale maTe ja. sAmuM belensa levAI jAyane ! tarata laI lene ! ane ajJAnIneya che te dukhatuM hoya tyAMne tyAM ja rahe che ne dhyAna, eTale ja maTe che. davA-bavA badhuM nimitta che. ajJAnIne tyAMthI dhyAna khase nahIM. praznakartA H upayoga vaparAI javAthI zuM pariNAma ? ane upayoga jaLavAI rahevAthI zuM pariNAma ? 260 dAdAzrI : upayoga ja nathI tyAM pachI dhovAvAno kyAM savAla che ? upayoga to e mazInarI je ripera karanArA chene, temane upayoga rahevAno paNa ahaMkArI upayoga rahevAno. ane tAre AtmAne AvaraNa lAvIne upayoga rahevAno. eno ahaMkAra khapavAno ne tAro A AvaraNa lAvIne ahaMkAra khapavAno. khapavAno to beu sarakhuM ja chene ! adhavacce aTavAya jhAMkharAmAM ! praznakartA : jIvanamAM judA judA prasaMgamAM kyAM kyAM upayoga tUTavAnA bhayasthAna che ? ene tyAM kema aTakAvI zakAya e tUTavAmAMthI ? kAraNa ke upayoga sarakI javAnI ghaNI jagyAo che. dAdAzrI : nA, A chaTakIya jatuM nathI. chaTakI jatuM hoya to to lAya baLe to pAcho Ave. ane paraupayogaya thaI jato nathI. svaupayoganA najIkanA jhAMkharAmAM badhe pharyA kare che. paraupayoga to te mahIM baLatarA UbhI kare. e thato nathI. svaupayoganA jhAMkharAmAM jarAka mahIM pese e pAchalI Dakhalo badhI. AgalI-pAchalI Dakhala, emAM cIkAza narI. paraupayogamAM hoya to dhakko vAge. svaupayogamAM hoya nahIM ne paraupayogamAM jAya nahIM evuM vacce pelo gUMcAya.

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zuddha upayoga 261 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : vacce eTale kevI dazA e ? dAdAzrI : saMtoSakAraka thAya nahIM ane AvuM laTakI laTakIne javAya nahIM. vaccenI dazA. gUMcavADA gUMcavADA khAlI. eTale upayoga AmAM bagaDyA kare. avatAro vadhe TI.vI.nA mohathI ! praznakartA : divasamAM be-traNa kalAka ApaNe Telivijhana joIe e zuM kahevAya, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : e Telivijhana to jovAya ja nahIM. e joIe eTale basa tyAM ja upayoga rahe. be upayoga rahe nahIM tamane. ane jovAmAM haMmezAM be upayoga thAya nahIM. sAMbhaLavAmAM be upayoga thAya, kAna vAsI nakhAya. Telivijhana to jovAya ja nahIM. praznakartA : ane InDiyana mUvIye nA jovAya ? dAdAzrI : kazuMya jovAya nahIM. TI.vI. to AMkhonI zakti toDI nAMkhe che. ane AMkho kheMcavAnI thAya, AMkhonuM jyAM kheMcANa thAyane tyAM AkhuMya zarIra kheMcAtuM hoya, eTale upayoga rahe nahIM bIjI jagyAe. ane mokSanI utAvaLa nA hoya to TIvI jovAno vAMdho nathI, haju pacAsa-so avatAra kADhyA pachI javuM hoya to vAMdho nathI. praznakartA: TI.vI. jovuM ne e badhuM tame kahyuM ke juo ne jANo ane pachI enI meLe kharI jAya to e kharuM ke A choDI devuM e kharuM ? dAdAzrI : TI.vI.-bIvI nA hoya AmAM. chokarAM TI.vI. jotAM hoya to e AMkhone kharAba karanAruM che. ane jotAM hoya to ApaNe ene jarA Thapako Apavo. Thapako eTale kahIe tame caMdubhAI Avo TAIma zuM karavA bagADo cho ? praznakartA : A chokarAMone noleja mATe, peluM vAilDa lAIphanuM AvatI hoya, necaranuM AvatuM hoya, nyUjha AvatA hoya enA mATe. dAdAzrI : e barobara che. chokarAM jue, ApaNe dekhADIe kharAM, pachI UThIne ApaNe ApaNA kAmamAM pesI javuM. ene rAge pADI ApIe. mokSanI utAvaLa nA hoya tyAM vAMdho nahIM ! praznakartA : pattA ramavA, ramI ramavuM ane TI.vI. jovuM enAthI kayuM karma baMdhAya ? dAdAzrI : baLyuM, ajJAna karma, bIjuM kayuM karma ? darzana mohanIya. praznakartA : darzana mohanIya baMdhAya, AvaraNa AvyA kare ? dAdAzrI : jJAna AvarAya, jJAna badhuM UDI gayuM ne darzana mohanIya AvI gayuM. enAthI to UbhuM thayuM che jagata. dAdA joDe niraMtara rahI zake upayogavALo ja ! eTale ame kahIe chIe ke mArI joDe to niraMtara upayogavALo hoya e rahI zake. jene upayoga ja nA hoya, te zI rIte rahe mArI joDe ? upayogavALo hoya ene amArI joDe sAruM phAve. nahIM to ko'ka dahADo Ave ne aThavADiye eka dahADo te bahu lAbha UThAve. kAraNa ke ullAsa vyApI jAyane ! ane bhUkhyo mANasa sAta dahADe jamavA bese, ene kevuM hoya ? praznakartA : dAdAnI sAthe rahevAmAM je ThaMDaka vartAya, ene hisAbe upayoga cUkAI jAya che ? dAdAzrI : e to ahIM pelI ThaMDaka vartane eTale upayoga rahe nahIMne ! praznakartA : ThaMDaka to upayogamAM hoya to ja varse ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : nA. eTale e upayogamAM hoya to varte, nahIM evuM nahIM. paNa A ThaMDaka jJAnI puruSanA sAnidhyathI varte ja. praznakartA : e ThaMDaka varte eTale enI jAgRti maMda thaI jAya ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM thAya ? kazI pragati nA mAMDe. evara jAgRta hoya te amArI joDe rahe to vAMdho nahIM. nahIM to jhAjhe dahADe

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zudgha upayoga phAyado thAya. bIjuM bahAranuM grahaNa karavAnuM baMdha thaI jAyane ! bahAranI koI aDacaNa baMdha thAya ane ahIM AgaLa dhIme dhIme ghasAtuM jAya. joDe rahevAnuM maLI Ave to sAruMya kharuM. bahAranuM to bagaDe nahIMne ! bIjo paNa durupayoge ya baMdha che ne ? ene A jJAnI puruSanI hAjarImAM je dhovAya, ema ne ema vagara upayoge je dhovAze e sAcuM. ane ko'ka dahADo eno amala to Avazene ? praznakartA : hAjarImAM to dhovAya ja ne ? dAdAzrI : amalamAM Ave ko'ka dahADo. e kacaro ekadama ocho thaI jAyane ekAvana TakA. to pachI potAnI zakti e AnI lagAma hAthamAM Ave. pachI jhapATAbaMdha cAle pAchuM. 263 praznakartA : vagara upayoge dhovAya ane upayogapUrvaka dhovAya, emAM zuM phera ? dAdAzrI : bahu phera. upayogapUrvaka dhovAya e saMpUrNa zuddha hoya ane peluM pachI pAchuM pharI dhovuM paDaze. dhovAnuM e saheluM paNa e kevuM Avaze ? amathuM eka phero A sAbuvALA pANImAM nAkhIne chabachabAvI nAkhavAnuM. eTale vAMdho nahIM, cokhkhuM thayeluMne ! A che sthULa svarUpe, zuddha upayoga ! praznakartA : dAdA, upayogapUrvaka dhovAya eTale sahaja kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : sahaja nahIM. saMpUrNa jAgRtipUrvaka upayoga hoya. praznakartA : kharekhara je upayoga rahevo joIe e kevo hoya ? dAdAzrI : e to bahu judI vastu che. A sthULa AvyuM che e sAruM che. lokone sthULa upayoge ya kyAM che ? praznakartA : sthULa upayoga eTale potAnI prakRtine mana-vacana kAyAne joyA karavA e ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : amArA zabdothI upayoga lIdhelo te, AjJAthI. AjJAthI rahe e. pelo to upayoga bahu judI jAtano hoya. 264 praznakartA : paNa dAdA, e upayoga to khAlI jJAnI puruSane ja hoyane ? dAdAzrI : bIjA kone hoya te paNa ? sahelI vastu nathI A. sthULa ja nathI rahetone lokone ! sthULanuM ja ThekANuM nathI. praznakartA : je zuddhAtmAnA darzana karIe e sthULa upayogamAM ja gaNAya ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM karyuM kahevAya ? e to AjJApUrvaka chene ! praznakartA : eTale avalaMbana che, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : e avalaMbana nahIM, zabda ja che A to. bIjuM zuM che tamane ? zabdanuM phaLa maLe che. bAkI emAM AtmAne zuM levAdevA ? AtmA ethI kaMI joyo-jANyo ? paNa enuM phaLa maLe che eTale AnaMda thAya che. eTale ApaNane AtmAnI khAtrI thaI gaI ke bhaI, pratIti che ja, cokkasa che. sthULa upayoga to bahu sAro. A to tArA jevA bahu thoDA pALe che. zuddha upayoga sthULa kahevAya. to ya e zuddha upayoga ! upayoga zuddha rahevo joIe ke A zuddha che, huM zuddha chuM. koI kartA nathI. huM karato nathI evo zudgha upayoga rahevo joIe. ko'ka kare che e mAnIe toya upAdhi. akrama vijJAna jene prApta thayuM, tene covIse kalAka nirjarA hoya. te vaDodarethI tyAM gADImAM beThA, e tyAMthI nirjarA zarU thaI. e nirjarAmAM tame bIjuM game te kAma karI zako. jema gADImAM beThelo mANasa game te vAMce, nAsto kare toya gADI amadAvAda jaI rahI che. praznakartA : evI rIte nirjarAmAM game te kAma karI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : hA. evuM AmAM vyavahAra cAlyA kare ane tamAre jJAtA

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zuddha upayoga 265 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) draSTA tarIke rahevAnuM, ke A caMdubhAInuM mana zuM karI rahyuM che, buddhi zuM karI rahI che. zuddha upayogamAM raho eTale vItarAga rahI zake che. praznakartA: e zuddha upayogamAM jyAre hoya tyAre manamAM pAchA ko'ka vakhata kaMI vicAro Aveya kharA. dAdAzrI : teno kaMI vAMdho nahIM. e chone Ave ne jAya, mahIM vakhate caDhI beThA hoya to ya vAMdho nathI. paNa ApaNe zuddha upayoga na cUkavo joIe. praznakartA: paNa emAM je vicAro AvyA e pachI jovAnA ja rahe chene, emAM taddarUpa thAya to muzkelI UbhI thAya che. dAdAzrI : nA, jovAnA vakhate nAya bane. jovAnA vakhate to upayoga ja che, paNa vakhate keTalIkavAra jovAnuM nA bane. taduMrUpa saheja thaI jAya, paNa tethI kaMI bagaDatuM nathI. e to pUrvakarma bahu jADuM hoyane to ene potAne bahu guMlATa hau khavaDAvI de. paNa tethI kaMI navuM karma baMdhAtuM nathI. sAmAyika samaye upayoga ! praznakartA: ApaNe je kaMI sAmAyika karIe chIe, je kaMI vicAro Ave, ene joyA enuM pariNAma zuM Ave che ? dAdAzrI : enAthI zuddha upayoga rahe. vicArane jovo e ja ApaNo jJAtA-draSTA svabhAva. potAnA svabhAvamAM AvyA, enuM nAma zuddha upayoga kahevAya. eTale e sAmAyikamAM jo kadI tame vicArone juo to pachI zuddha upayogamAM cho ja. praznakartA : dAdA, sAmAyika vakhate kevo upayoga rahe ? dAdAzrI : sAmAyika vakhate ya upayoga jAgRti sArI rahe. bIjuM zuM ? upayoga ja kahIe chIe ApaNe ene. praznakartA : kharI rIte to e upayoga nathI ja ne, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : kharI rIte to upayoga nA kahevAya. eTale zuddha upayoga e bahu judI vastu che. praznakartA : dAdA, Apane kevo upayoga rahe che ? dAdAzrI : e to upayoga ora ja jAtano. e to AtmacAritra kahevAya ! e to tamane nA rahe paNa ema mAno ke amuka kakSAno, tamArI kakSAno to raheje ! praznakartA : e zuM hoya ? e jarA kaho to kharA. dAdAzrI : AtmA e daraasala svarUpe hoya. praznakartA : A kahe che, mane AvuM rahyuM. A prasaMgamAM. to Apane zuM rahe ? dAdAzrI : bahu UMcuM. e hAle ja nahIMne ! kazuM hAle ja nahIM, pRthakkaraNa thayA kare. A khAnAra koNa ? ne evuM tevuM hoya nahIMne kazuM. badhI ekjhakTanesa hoya. eNe pelA bhAI beThA hoya, tuM ahIM beTho hoya. eka phero emane joI lIdhA pachI che te, e tyAM beThelA che evuM tane khabara ja paDene ? praznakartA : hA. khabara ja paDI jAya. dAdAzrI : pachI vAreghaDIe ene tyAM tapAsa kare nahIM ke e bhAI beThA che ke nathI beThA ? koNa beThuM che, koNa nahIM ? praznakartA : e tapAsa nA karavI paDe. dAdAzrI : eTale 'huM mArI sITa upara, e enI sITa upara. A aMbAlAla emanI sITa upara, badhuM potapotAnI sITa upara ja hoya. AghApAchA nahIM, ekjhakTanesa hoya. tamAre e to mazInarI cAlu thaI gaI. eTale khAnAra koNa ? phalANuM koNa ? Ama koNa ? tema koNa ? e jAgRti badhuM dekhADe. AgaLa pachI to ekkekTanesa joIene ? evuM kazuM to vicAra ja nA AvavA joIe. evuM kUdAkUda pariNAma nA hoya.

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zuddha upayoga 267 268 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) judo sadA gAtAro, sAMbhaLatAro te jANatAro ! tuM gAuM chuM kharo paNa sAMbhaLato nathIne ? sAMbhaLavuM nA joIe? pote gAya ne pote zabdezabda sAMbhaLe, to akrama vijJAnamAM Avyo kahevAya. gAnAra judo, sAMbhaLanAra judo ane jANanAra judo. jANanAra jANe ke ANe barAbara zabdezabda ATalA zabda sAMbhaLyA nathI haju. tame to kharA ekalA gA gA karo cho, loTa bhaiDIe to hAMDavo bane eno to ! ema karane, pado vAMcavAnuM rAkho Aja. Aja badhA e abhyAsa karo. AMkho mIMcIne "namo arihaMtANaM', akSare akSara vaMcAya, te "namo siddhANaM, namo AyariyANuM.... te "namo bhagavate vAsudevAya, namaH zivAya, jaya saccidAnaMda' tyAM sudhI vAMcavuM ane pachI mahIM zI bhUla thaI hoya, te pachI bIjI vakhata e kADhI nAkhavI. Aje e karo, juo AtmA hAjara thaI jaze. vAMcanAra te ghaDIe AtmA che. praznakartA : vAMcanAra AtmA che. dAdAzrI : e to pachI vadhArAnuM. paNa A huM nA dekhAuM ne peluM vaMcAya toya bahu thaI gayuM. cokhkhuM-pyora vaMcAvuM joIe. pyaoNra zabda hrasvai, dIrghaI badhuM kampliTa, dAdAne to dekhavAno bIjo rasto hoya che, paNa AvuM vAMcatI vakhate enI mahIM bheLaseLa nA karavuM. A badhuM dekhavAnuM rAkhavuM. hrasvai-dIrghaI, TUMkuM, badhuM zabdezabda. je bole e badhuM tuM vAMcI zake kharo ? to e upayogapUrvaka bolyA kahevAya. praznakartA : A jJAna pachI navakAra karavA hoya to kevI rIte bolavA? dAdAzrI : navakAra 'ApaNe' karavAnA nahIM. ApaNe jANavAnuM ke koNa kare che ane barobara nA karyA hoya to arIsAmAM joIne caMdubhAIne kahevuM joIe. bAkI, navakAra karavAmAM koI vAMdho nathI paNa AtmArUpa rahevuM te vakhate. aMte e lAve zuddha upayoga ! ApaNane evA udaya Avaze. eka eka dahADAnA apavAsa kare, ekaTANAM thAya, evA udaya Avaze. paNa e udaya pramANe karavAnuM. ApaNe kheMcI lAvIne kazuM karavAnuM nahIM. udaya Ave to upavAsa karavAno. ane pachI Akho dahADo zuddhAtmAno upayoga rAkhavo. bhagavAne kahyuM che ke zuddha upayogapUrvaka jo eka ja upavAsa thAya, to kalyANa thaI jAya. ane upayoga vagaranA upavAsane bhagavAne DhoralAMghaNa kahyuM che. vadhAre khauM tyAre zuM thAya ? evuM ja thaI jAya, nahIM ? tAreya thAya evuM, dUdhapAka vadhAre khauM tyAre ? praznakartA : upayoga nA rahe barobara. eka vakhata tame kahyuM'tuM, jamatI vakhate vAto karo to upayogapUrvaka jamAya ja nahIM. dAdAzrI : zI rIte jamAya ? jamavAnuM upayogapUrvaka hovuM joIe ke mahIM zuM zuM che ? dAdAzrI : hA, vAMcanAra. eka eka pada karI juone ! AMkho mIMcIne Ama, 'namo bhagavate vAsudevAya" dekhAya che ke nahIM barAbara ? eTale badhAya akSara dekhAze pachI. dekhAya che ? praznakartA H dekhAya che dAdA. dAdAzrI : mahIM peThA hoya eTale to A zuddhAtmAno upayoga kahevAya che. A dhyAna nA kahevAya. eka kalAka sudhInI AvI vastu goThavelI hoyane to eka kalAka sudhI vAMcyA karIe to bahu thaI gayuM, e to moTAmAM moTo upayoga. A to ame je karIe, te tamane dekhADI daIe. ame je karatA hatA, e badhuM dekhADI daIe. henDala to mAravuM ja paDene ! tame to atyAre jJAtA-draSTA raho chone te kevuM, A sthaLa bhAgamAM raho cho. A sUkSmamAM javuM paDaze. praznakartA H AMgaLI lakhe, AMkho vAMce ane tame dekhAva evuM thAya che.

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zuddha upayoga 269 270 praznakartA : tame tyAre evuM bolelA ke 'tame kahone ke amane upayoga che, paNa ene upayoga nA kahevAya. e to lakSa kahevAya tamAruM. upayoga to bahu UMcI vastu che, e amane rahe." dAdAzrI : upayoga vastu ghaNI UMcI che. A lakSa kahevAya. lakSa eTale jAgRti. eTale A upayoga lAve evI vastu, zuddha upayogane lAvanArI. eTale jAgRti kharI, paNa A zuddha upayogane lAve. upayoga to kyAre kahevAya ke A nahAvuM hoya to Ama Ama hAtha pheravavo paDe ne Amatema thAya, eTale tyAM AgaLa pachI upayoga nA rahe. nIrubena navaDAve toya amane upayoga rahe. e paga dhovaDAve te ghaDIe huM upayogamAM rahI zakuM ane ApaNA A jagatanA loko zuM kare che ? e havA AvI, temAM mastAna thaI jAya. basa evuM ja, upayoga cUke ! praznakartA : paNa nIrUbena dAdAne navaDAvatA hoya. te vakhate nIrubena je karI rahyAM che, navaDAvI rahyAM che, to enA para emano potAno ya upayoga hoyane ? dAdAzrI : e emano upayoga te sAro hoya. e to emane bahu phAyadAkartA hoya. emane to upayoga sAro ja hoyane ! e pRthakkaraNa nA hoya toya che te mAruM kahevAnuM, ema ne ema ja sarasa rahe. upayoga rahene ! evuM che ne, zuddha upayoga mATe A pelA lokoe zodhakhoLa karI ke bhaI, A mUrtione navaDAvo-dhovaDAvo. tamAre tyAM brAhmaNo nathI dhovaDAvatA ? A zubha upayoga. ane sAcI mUrtine dhUe, sAcI jIvatI mUrtine navaDAve e zuddha upayoga kahevAya. pelo zubha upayoga kahevAya. praznakartA : dAdA, A dAdAnI vANI utAratA hoya, emAM upayoga jevuM kaMI hoya ? dAdAzrI : upayoga ja kahevAyane ! e zuddha upayoganI biginiMga thaI, zuddha upayoga nA gaNAya. A zuddha upayogamAM lAvanAro A upayoga. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : eTale A upayoga zuddha upayogane lAvaze. dAdAzrI : hA, lAvaze. jema kolejamAM beTho, te chevaTe prophesara thavAno. eTale bahu, e to dAdAnI vANI utAre, e to bahu sArAmAM sAruM. tane aMdara chapAI jaze. e chapAI gayeluM, e badhuM pachI jAya nahIM jJAna. e to jyAre jarUra paDe tyAre hAjara thAya. atyAre tuM yAda karavA jAuM, emAMnuM yAda nA Ave, jarUra paDe tyAre hAjara thAya ke dAdAe AvuM kahyuM che.. Ama cUkAya upayoga khAtI vakhate ! praznakartA : Apa to niraMtara samAdhimAM raho chone, upayogamAM ja hova chone Apa ? dAdAzrI : upayoganuM phaLa samAdhi. eTale samAdhimAM rahevAnI jarUra nahIM. upayogamAM ja raho. samAdhi karavAnI jarUra nahIM. upayogamAM raho to enuM phaLa samAdhi. samAdhi e phaLa che. praznakartA : hA, have Apa upayogamAM hatA, ziMgoDA khAvAnI icchA thaI e upayogamAM rahIne ? dAdAzrI : nA, e upayoga baMdha thayo. praznakartA : to e vakhate upayogamAM rahIne tyAM ziMgoDA khAvAnI icchA nahIM ? dAdAzrI : nA, nA. e upayoga baMdha thayo. praznakartA : upayoga baMdha thayo, evuM kema bane ? dAdAno upayoga to cAlu ja hoyane ? - dAdAzrI : be upayoga hoI zake nahIM. eTa e TAIma be upayogamAM hoI zake nahIM. keTalAka prasaMgamAM hoya ne keTalAka prasaMgamAM nA hoya, paNa ziMgoDAMnA prasaMgamAM to mane upayoga nahoto rahyo. praznakartA : eTale eno artha e thayo ke jyAre paNa AvI icchAo thAya tyAre upayoga baMdha thaI jAya ?

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zuddha upayoga 271 272 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : nA, evuMya nathI. te icchAya judI che ne upayoga judo che. ghaNI pherA upayoga baMdheya nathI thato, ghaNI vakhata icchA hoya toya. aMdarano phorsa kayo che e upara AdhAra rAkhe che. praznakartA H Apa jamatA ho, amuka vastuo sAme AvI hoya ane A mAre levuM che, A nathI levuM evuM nahIM thAya to.. dAdAzrI : ane te enA upayogamAM rahIne jamI zake. paNa bahu priya vastu hoya tyAre upayoga cUke. jyAre A ziMgoDAM khAvAnuM nakkI karyuM eTale bhaI upayoga cUkyA'tA. praznakartA : eTale bahu priya enA jevI vAta thaI. dAdAzrI : nA, priya nahIM, paNa sAdhAraNa priya che tyAre UThyAne e. nahIM to bhUkha nahotI. jo bhUkha hoya to to ApaNe jANIe ke bhaI, bhUkhanA mATe UThyA'tA. eTale to upayoga rahyo kahevAya. A to orDInarI hatuM. thatuM nathI. toya jAgRti gaNAya. A to tanmayAkAra badhuM. ame vAta to jamatI vakhate karIe ja nahIM koI dahADoya. vAto kare eTale upayoga jato rahe badho. praznakartA : e tyAM vAtomAM jAya amAruM. dAdAzrI : hA. paNa evuM ne evuM ja. upayoga jato rahe che avaLo A lokone. tamane khabara paDIne, upayogapUrvaka nathI kema jamAtuM ? upayoga eTale ApaNe koNa ? jamanAra koNa ? zAmAM jamanArane inTaresTa che ? jamanArane svAda nA Avato hoya to ApaNe kahevuM ke sarasa che A ! e badhuM jANavuM paDe, jAgRtipUrvaka. paNa ATaluM yAda rahe, eTalA mATe ame tamane bolIe ke kaMI yAda Ave toya bahu thaI gayuM. A dAdA kahe che evuM thatuM nathI, eTaluM kahe toya bahu thaI gayuM. e upayoga raheto nathI. praznakartA : dAdA, paNa koI oLakhItA AvyA hoya ne ApaNe jamatI vakhate vAta karatA hoya to pachI vAta karavI ja paDe ! dAdAzrI : vAta karavA jAya to 'pachI karajone nirAMte', kahIe. praznakartA : A badhA sAmasAme beThAM hoIe. pelo vAta karyA ja karato hoya to ApaNe vAta karavI ja paDe. dAdAzrI : ApaNe emane kahIe ke ekavAra jamI lo. utAvaLa zuM che, pachI ApaNe nirAMte vAta karIe chIe. koI dahADo jAgRti rahelI jamatI vakhate ? paNa e jAgRti nA rahe pachI. jenI zarUAta vAMkI, ene pachI jAgRti nA Ave. pachI upayoga sthira nA thAya. praznakartA : paNa e upayoga to dareke dareka kriyAmAM rahevo ja joIene, A zuddha upayoga ! dAdAzrI : mAruM kahevAnuM ke amuka kriyAmAM to rahevo joIe, baLyo. khAvAmAM evI je moTI moTI kriyAo hoya che, emAM to rahevo joIe. upayoga rahe nahIM ne lapaTAM paDI gayelAM citta, baLyAM ! badhAmAM nA rakhAya, praznakartA : jamatA hoya ane koI sAthe vAto paNa karatA hoya..... dAdAzrI : te vakhate upayoga nA rahe, kema karIne rahe upayoga ? Ama rahe upayoga jamatI vakhate... upayogano artha zuM ? koNa khAya che ? A khAnAra kevI rIte khAya che ? zAmAM huDa huDa karyA kare che ? zAmAM e vadhAre svAda le che ? zI zI vastu nathI khAtA ane khAya che ? teno svAda kharekhara ekjhakTa zuM Ave che ? e pote pAcho upayoga ema rAkhe. upayogapUrvaka jamavAnuM. koInuM meM joyuM nathI ke upayogapUrvaka koIe khAdhuM hoya. huDa huDa jANe mazIna cAlyuM. khAvuM-pIvuM badhuM upayogapUrvaka hovuM joIe. nA thayuM teno vAMdho nathI paNa A jAgRti Ave to kAmanuM. ame to bhUlane samI karavAnI nA kahIe. pharI bhUla nA thAya evI jarA jAgRti rAkhajo. chatAMya pharI bhUla thavAnI tamAre. toya pharI jAgRti rAkhaje ke dAdAe kahyuM evuM

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zuddha upayoga 273 234 paNa A jamatI vakhate to upayoga rahevo ja joIe. pachI bolatI vakhate upayogapUrvaka ja bolavuM joIe. praznakartA : A jamatI vakhate A bolavA gayA eTale upayoga cUkyA. have evI samajaNa na hoya to evA khyAlamAM ja rahevAya ke ApaNane jJAnamAM barobara rahevAya che, jAgRtimAM rahevAya che. paNa AvI badhI vacalI bhUlo khabara na paDe. dAdAzrI : badhI bahu bhUlo. A to narI bhUlo ja thavAnI. jAgRti to tane jAgRti Ape, paNa bIjI narI bhUlo ja chene ! eTale A ame vAtacIta kara kara karIe chIe. bhUla khabara paDe to pAchuM jAgRti tyAM jAya. khabara nA paDe tyAM sudhI to ema ne ema aMdhera ja rahe. eTalA mATe A Takora Takora karIene ! emAMthI kaMIka tamArI bhUlo pakaDAI jAya tamane ne cetatuM rahevAya. upayoga upara upayoga ! pahelo upayoga eTale je zuddha upayoga che te che. e upayoga eTale potAnI jAtane zuddha jovI, bIjAne zuddha jovA, AjJAmAM rahevuM e badhuM zuddha upayoga kahevAya. ane e zuddha upayoganI upare ya upayoga rAkhe ke zuddha upayoga kevo varte che ! e kevaLajJAna kahevAya ne pahelo zuddha upayoga kahevAya. upayoga upayogamAM e kevaLajJAna che. zuddha upayoga jJAna svarUpa kahevAya ane upayoga upayogamAM e vijJAna svarUpa kahevAya, kevaLajJAna svarUpa kahevAya. zuddha upayoganI je jAgRti che tenI upareya jAgRti e kevaLajJAnanI jAgRti che, chellI jAgRti che. 'jJAnI'nI jAgRti e zuddha upayoga kahevAya ane tenA uparanI jAgRti e kevaLajJAnano upayoga kahevAya. amane jAgRti paranI jAgRti rahe, paNa jevI tIrthaMkarane rahe eTalI badhI nA rahe. tIrthakaroe darzAvela zuddha upayoganI vATe... bhagavAna mahAvIra zuddha upayogamAM rahetA hatA. niraMtara covIse AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) kalAka. ApaNA mahAtmAone zuddha upayoga Ave te kevuM, taDako paDene mahIM, evuM thoDIvAra Ave, pAcho jato rahe. thoDIvAra Ave ne jato rahe. ane jagatanAM lokoe to zuddha upayoga sAMbhaLyoya nA hoya ne joyoya nA hoya. A to ApaNe ahIM AgaLa A jeTalAne jJAna ApyuM chene tene zuddha upayoga. bAkI bIjAne to sAdhu-AcAryo hoya toya zuddha upayoga joyo nA hoya. zuddha upayoga to AtmA prApta thayA pachI hoya. A to jJAnI puruSa ekalAne hoya. kramika mArgamAM TheTha saMpUrNa jJAna thAya, te dA'De zuddha upayoga hoya. nahIM to emanA jJAnIoneya zuddha upayoga to thoDI-ghaNIvAra rahe, bAkI rahe nahIM. kAraNa ke zuddha upayogamAM AtmA saMpUrNapaNe jANavAnI jarUra che. saMpUrNapaNe AtmA jANyo kyAre kahevAya ? ahaMkAra jAya tyAre saMpUrNa AtmA thAya tyAre e jANyo kahevAya. jeTalo ahaMkAra che eTalo AtmA jANyo nathI. e to kramika mArganAM jJAnIoneya ahaMkAra hoya. A bhagavAna mahAvIrano, covIsa tIrthakarono zuddha upayoga. eka phero samajI le, pachI pharI samajavAnI jarUra hotI nathI. niraMtara zuddha upayoga e ja kevaLajJAta! meM je jJAna ApyuM. te tamane darzanamAM pariNAma pAmyuM. have jJAna che te amArI joDe besazo tema tema teTalA aMze vadhatuM jaze, tema zuddha upayoga utpanna thaze. jeTalo zuddha upayoga utpanna thayo eTaluM jJAna che. e zuddha upayoga saMpUrNa varto niraMtara, enuM nAma kevaLajJAna ! saMpUrNa zuddha upayoga te kevaLajJAna kahyuM che 360deg nuM ane zuddhAtmAnuM lakSa che to ene dasa-paMdara TakA to kevaLajJAna kahevAya. ene zuddha upayogamAMthI kevaLajJAnanA bIja ropAyA. aMza kevaLajJAna utpanna thayuM. e savAMza thatAM TAIma lAge, sau saunAM puruSArtha pramANe. je amArI AjJAmAM rahe ene saMpUrNa zuddha upayoga kahevAmAM Ave che. have AjJA kaMI agharI nathI. praznakartA ane kevaLajJAnInA badhAM pradezonAM AvaraNa nIkaLI jAya ? dAdAzrI : badhAMya, badhAM khullAM ! paNa e vagara kAmanuM nA jue. nahIM to upayoga bagaDene ! eTale badhe zuddha ja jue.

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anubhava [4] - lakSa - pratIti pAmyA tiraMtara pratIti ! tamAre AtmAnuM lakSa keTalo vakhata rahetuM haze ? praznakartA H rahyA ja kare che. dAdAzrI : niraMtara rahe. eTale jeNe mArI joDe vadhAre paricaya rAkhyo chene, ene niraMtara evuM rahe. kAraNa ke A AtmAnuM anubhava jJAna che. AtmAnuM lakSa beTheluM che, te niraMtara rahe. praznakartA : paNa ophIsamAM kAmamAM hoya tyAre niraMtara nathI rahetuM. dAdAzrI : kAmamAM hoya tyAre nathI rahetuM eno artha e ke te ghaDIe lakSamAM nathI rahetuM, paNa pratItimAM hoya chene ! praznakartA : prasaMga Ave tyAre jJAna hAjara nA rahe, paNa pachI hAjara thAya to ApaNe zuM samajavuM ? ApaNI samajamAM UNapa, puruSArthamAM kacAza ke jAgRtino abhAva ? dAdAzrI : AmAM jAgRtino abhAva, puruSArthanI kacAza ke samajamAM UNapa nathI. phakta e prasaMge jJAna hAjara nA rahe. atyAre koInI joDe che te levaDa-devaDano hisAba karato hoya, te vakhate lakSa nA rahe koI dA'Doya. te ghaDIe zuM rahe ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : te vakhate kampliTa dhyAna e levaDa-devaDamAM ja hoya. dAdAzrI : te ghaDIe lakSa nA rahe eTale tamane ema lAge ke A mahIM ekAkAra thaI gayuM, paNa pratIti jatI nathI. niraMtara pratIti rahe ja ! praznakartA : eTale pAchuM e kAmakAja dUra thAya eTale pharI mULa svarUpamAM AvI javAya ? 276 dAdAzrI : niraMtara pratItino tAra che mATe e mULa svarUpamAM avAya che, nahIM to nA avAya. niraMtara tAra che e niraMtara pratIti eTale kSAyaka samakita kahevAya. te A niraMtara pratItine laIne enI joDe bhAMjagaDa pUrI thaI ke pAcho 'huM zuddhAtmA' thaI gayo, e ja lakSa. pachI lakSamAM avAya ane lakSamAM AvyA pachI jo kadI ekAMta maLI gayuM koI jagyAe, to anubhavamAM ya avAya. anubhava rasa cAkhe eTale potAno je AtmasvabhAva che eno anubhava varte, lakSa varte, pratIti varte. A traNa pagathiyAthI nIce Utare nahIM. niraMtara pratItivALuM che A. kramikamArgamAM to pratIti kSayopazama hoya. ghaDImAM pratIti hoya, ghaDImAM UDI gayelI hoya. ghaDImAM upazama thayelI hoya, ghaDImAM e kSaya thayelI hoya ane A to niraMtara kSAyaka pratIti kahevAya. covIsa kalAka pratIti jAya nahIM. niraMtara, AkhI jiMdagI sudhI 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e pratIti jAya nahIM. ane pahelAM covIse ya kalAka 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e pratIti jAya nahIM. pahelAM tamAre covIsa kalAka 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' evI pratIti rahetI hatI ? praznakartA : hA, pahelA evuM ja hatuM. dAdAzrI : niraMtara, covIseya kalAka ? thoDIvAra 'AtmA chuM' AvatuM haze ? praznakartA : nA re nA. janarala menejara chuM ne A chuM ne te chuM badhuM evuM rahetuM hatuM. dAdAzrI : e pratIti eTale roMga bilipha, enuM nAma mithyAtva. ane A pratIti e rAITa bilipha, enuM nAma samyak darzana. jo A samyak darzana utpanna thayuM che, vaLI kSAyaka !

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 277 278 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : Ama to aMdarathI chUTo chuM evuM ja, Ama samajaNamAM barAbara che paNa Ama koIvAra hajI bheLaseLa thaI jAya che evuM lAge. dAdAzrI : nA, ema nahIM. tamane pUche ke tame caMdulAla cho ke zuddhAtmA, to zuM kaho ? praznakartA : zuddhAtmA. emAM to vikalpa ja nathI. dAdAzrI : to pachI e ja kahevAnuM. bIjuM tamAre Ama rahe che ke nathI rahetuM e jovAnuM nahIM. evuM kazuM jovAnuM ja nA hoya. tamArI pratItimAM zuM che, eTaluM ja jovAnuM hoya. praznakartA : pratItimAM to dAdA maLyA eTale badhuM sacoTa thaI gayuM. dAdAzrI : basa, eTaluM ja jovAnuM hoya. bIjuM peluM kazuM ja jovAnuM nA hoya. e niraMtara pratItino tAra che ane tethI lakSa bese, nahIM to lakSa rahe nahIM. lakSa bese ja nahIMne ! ane koInI joDe vAto karIe tyAre lakSa cUkI jaIe, paNa vAto pUrI thAya ke pAchuM lakSa AvI jAya. e niraMtara pratItino tAra, lAyaka samakita, kSAyaka samyak darzana, e siddha bhagavAnanA ATha guNomAMno eka guNa. eTale 18 siddha dazA ahIM utpanna thAya che. eTale ApaNe pratIti besavI joIe. 'ApaNe koNa chIe' evI pratIti bese eTale chuTakAro thaI ja gayo. pratIti eTale vijhA maLI gayA mokSanA ane pachI TikiTa maLI jAya eTale ukela AvI gayo. TikiTa nA hoya toya bhAMjagaDa, vijhA nA hoya toya bhAMjagaDa. banne bheguM thayuM eTale jyAre tArIkha Ape eTale jazo. e tArIkhe nahIM niveDo Ave to bIjI tArIkha goThavI do. paNa A be bheguM thayuM ke cAlyuM. jANyuM tenI varte pratIti ! 'te jJAna karIne jANyuM re, tenI varte che zuddha pratIti.' - zrImad rAjacaMdra. je jJAna karIne tame jANuM, tenI pratIti tamane varte. tene bhagavAne darzana kahyuM ke A pratIti tamane varte che. meM kahyuM hoya ke ATalI ATalI pAMca-sAta-dasa cIjo lakhAvuM ane tenAthI tamane A maraDo maTI jaze. eTale meM tamane jJAna ApyuM kahevAya. zenuM ? maraDo maTavAnuM. jema A mokSanuM jJAna hoya evuM A maraDo maTavAnuM paNa eka jJAna hoyane ? have e davA tame pachI phAko ane maraDo ocho thAya eTale tamane pratIti besatI jAya ke davA sArI che. mane mAphaka AvI. evI rIte AtmAmAM pratIti besatI jAya. jema jema anubhava thAya tema tema pratIti besatI jAya ane pratIti sajjaDa thayA pachI ja kAma thAya, nahIM to thAya nahIM. pratIti sajjaDa thaI javI joIe. e tamane to sajjaDa pratIti thaI che ! A pratIti beThelI che. A jagyAe. have e pratIti tamane beThI ane pachI UMdhI bAbato AvI. maraDo maTavA mAMDyo evI pratIti beThI ane pAchuM mahIM lohI paDavA mAMDyuM. eTale je pratIti beThA pachI avaLuMsavaLuM thAya paNa sthAna choDe nahIM pachI. je sthAna prApta thayuM che e choDe nahIM. A pratIti beThI che tamArI, enI mULa jagyA upara bese pratIti tamArI. have bIjuM koI UMdhuM bolanAro Avyo, UMdhuM zIkhavADanAra AvI gayo, to pratIti upara jarA Ama dabANa Ave, to Ama Ama vAMkuM thAya paNa sthAna choDe nahIM ! ta bhUlAya anubhava kadI ! praznakartA: 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' tema samajAyuM che, paraMtu tenuM niraMtara bhAna rahetuM nathI. dAdAzrI : bhAna zuM vastu che e tamane samajAyuM ke koI sigareTa pIto hoya, te eno chokaro mahIM Ama hAtha aDADavA jAya. have A chokarAne A roga kyAre jaze ? koI pIve tyAre ene A hAtha aDADavA jevuM karato hoyane Ama Ama kare. e to pachI eka dahADo enA Ama hAtha pakaDI jarA sigareTa eDADI ApIe. thoDIvAra rahevA daIe, e khUba dajhAya. pachI e anubhava bhUle nahIM AkhI jIMdagI. saLagatI sigareTanuM jarA lAla dekhAyuM ke bhAge, lAla dekhAyuM ke bhAge, enuM nAma anubhava

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 2 79 kahevAya. evo ame tamane AtmAno anubhava karAvI Apyo che. tyAre tamane zuddhAtmA rahe che, ema ne ema te raheto haze ? ame to dajhADyA vagareya karI ApIe AtmAno anubhava. A jagatamAM vastuono anubhava hau dAjhIne karavo paDe, paNa A AtmAno anubhava to paramAnaMda. AmAM dAjhavA karavAnuM nahIM. amArI joDe beso tyArathI ja AnaMda utpanna thAya. zuddhAtmAnuM niraMtara bhAna rahe ja che, tethI vadhAre zuM joIe ? A jJAna tamane niraMtara hAjara rahe che. tame korTamAM hoya toya e 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e tamane bhAna rahyA ja kare. pApo bhasmIbhUta thayA sivAya bhAna rahe nahIM koI dahADoya. A to eka zabda tamane kahyo hoya to bIje dahADe yAda nA rahe, to A tyAre yAda nathI rAkhavAnuM. phera, zraddhA ane pratItimAM ! praznakartA : ApaNe ema kahIe ke zraddhA beThI, ene pratIti kahevAya ? pratIti eTale zuM ? zraddhA ? dAdAzrI : zraddhA e badhAM sTeja kahevAya ane pratIti eTale ekjhakTa AvI gayuM. pratIti eTale AkhI mAnyatA so TakA pharI ane 'huM zuddhAtmA ja chuMe ja vAta cokkasa thaI gaI ane 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e zraddhA bese paNa UThI jAya pAchI ane pratIti UThe nahIM. zraddhA pharI jAya, pratIti phare nahIM. e pratIti eTale ApaNe A lAkaDI ahIM goThavI che tenI upara bahu dabANa Ave, to Ama vAMkI thaI jAya paNa sthAna choDe nahIM. game eTalo karmono udaya Ave, kharAba udaya Ave, paNa sthAna choDe nahIM. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e UDI nA jAya. ane gADha pratIti eTale zuM ? thoDIghaNI vAMkI thAya, vadhAre vAMkI nA thAya game eTaluM dabANa Ave toya. vAMkI thAya te loko kaheze, A UDI, UDI, UDI. paNa nA, sthAna choDe nahIM te gADha pratIti ! 280 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) anubhava, lakSa ne pratIti. pratIti e pAyo che. e pAyo thayA pachI lakSa utpanna thAya, pachI 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e lakSamAM rahyA ja kare niraMtara. ane jyAre navarAzamAM beThA hoya ane jJAtA-draza thayA thoDIvAra e anubhava. have jJAtA-draSTA te bahAranuM nahIM jovAnuM, A prakRtine ja joyA karavAnI ke A prakRti zuM gAMDAM kADhe che ! praznakartA : eTale caMdubhAIne ja joyA karavAnA. dAdAzrI : tene ja joyA karavAnA. DahApaNa zuM kare che te jovAnuM, gAMDapaNa zuM kare che te jovAnuM. gAMDapaNa kare to enI para cIDhAvuM nahIM ApaNe ane DahApaNa kare to enA para rAga nahIM rAkhavo. vItarAga rahevuM ApaNe to. gAMDapaNa kare to e kare che, ApaNe zuM ? pahelAMnA saMbaMdho te prakRtithI chUTA thaI gayA. prakRtinA javAbadAra kyAM sudhI hatA, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e pratIti hotI beThI tyAM sudhI. pachI enA javAbadAra nathI ApaNe ! pratIti mAtra AtmA mATe ! ahIM jJAna ApyA pachI bIje dahADethI AtmAnI pratIti bese che. ApaNane. pratIti besatI nathI bIje dahADe ? praznakartA : hA, besI jAya che. dAdAzrI : pachI ethI vadhAre zuM joIe ? A duniyAmAM koI evI cIja nathI ke jenAthI bIje dahADe AtmAnI pratIti bese. praznakartA : dAdA, e koIne pratIti to khAlI pustako vAMcavAthI paNa thAyane ? dAdAzrI : nA, e pratIti nA kahevAya. praznakartA : dAdAnI AptavANI ne AptasUtra evAM che ke dAdAne na maLyA hoya toya emAM pratIti jevuM lAge che. dAdAzrI : e pratIti to buddhinI pratIti, A mULa pratIti nA

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 281 282 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) kahevAya. e kAmamAM lAge ja nahIM. e kyAre pharI jAya e kahevAya nahIM. e to hamaNe sarTiphikeTa Ape ane pachI be kalAka pachI bIjuM sarTiphikeTa Ape. pratIti eTale pharI jAya nahIM, enuM nAma pratIti kahevAya. A tamane beThI pratIti. pratIti enuM nAma kahevAya ke have e jagyA choDe nahIM. pachI pAchuM bahu mAra paDe to Ama thaI jAya, Ama thaI jAya paNa jagyA nA choDe. tamane e ja pratIti ApelI che. game eTaluM saMsAranuM dabANa Ave, bhayaMkara dabANa Ave, te sAme phAMsI AvIne UbhI rahe toya paNa pratIti nA jAya. sanAtana vastu che pratIti. e kaMI evI vastu nathI zraddhA-khAtarI jevI, e zraddhA to UThI ye jAya kAle savAre pratIti nA jAya. khAtarI to khasI jAya, paNa pratIti nA khase ! prati + iti, iti zabda AtmAne lAgu thAya che. jema neti kahe che ne, na-iti, na-iti evuM iti AtmAne lAgu thAya che, pratIti. eka AtmA sivAya varlDamAM bIjI koI jagyAe pratIti zabda bolAya nahIM. ane pratIti e kyAreya paNa UThe nahIM. mArI nAkhe toya jAya nahIM. e moMDhe bole kharAM ke tamArA upara bilakula zraddhA nathI, Ama che tema che. gAMDuM-gheluM bole toya paNa pratIti beThelI jAya nahIM. kSAyaka pratIti che. kaMI jevI tevI vastu che te ! kRSNa bhagavAne prApta karI hatI evI kSAyaka pratIti che. A coMTI te coMTI. to pachI thoDA kalAkamAM kema mArI joDe saMga tUTato nathI eno ?! paricaya to lAMbo thayo nathI, e pratItino pratApa. mArI joDe vAMkocUko thaI jAya, e eno karmano udaya evo hoya tyAre bicArAno. e huM samajuM paNa enI pratIti nahIM jAya. praznakartA : eTale ekadama draDha khAtarI thaI jAya e pratIti ? amane avagADha pratIti hoya. bhale tIrthakara nathI paNa amane avagADha pratIti hoya. tamane gADhamAM besADelA che. ane kramika mArgamAM pratIti zabdathI hoya, A akrama mArgamAM anubhavathI hoya. pachI lakSaNa UbhAM thAya, kSamAnAM lakSaNa dekhAya, namratAnAM lakSaNa dekhAya, saraLatAnAM lakSaNa dekhAya, saMtoSanAM lakSaNa dekhAya. badhAM lakSaNo dekhAya. A pratIti beThAMnuM lakSaNa zuM ? tyAre kahe, A badhAM lakSaNo dekhAya. hamaNAM koI tamane bhAre gALo bolI jAya ne te tame UkaLo ane pachI chevaTe ene kSamA ApI do. pahelAM hatAM e caMdulAla tame nhoyane atyAre ? praznakartA : e ghaNo pharaka che. dAdAzrI : eTale pratIti beThI che tene lIdhe. pAchI namratA, eya tamane dekhAtI haze ke pahelAM namra nhoto, akkaDa hato ane akkaDamAMthI kyAMthI akaDAI ochI thaI gaI ! saraLatA to hatI ja jANe ke paNa vALanAra joIe sAro mANasa. pachI saMtoSa hoto, teya saMtoSa utpanna thayo. kaMIka to utpanna thayone ! vyavasthitane tAbe che ne ema kahIe eTale enuM nAma saMtoSa ne huM kartA tyAM asaMtoSa. ajAyaba prAti eka kalAkamAM ! tethI meM A vakIlane kahyuM, kalAkamAM tame zuM pAmI gayA ? zuM rahasya che AnI pAchaLa ? tyAre e vakIla kahe, be juduM paDI gayuM. meM kahyuM, AtmA ne deha be judA paDI gayA e tame joyA. ane A loko to pratIti khoLe che haju, saheja pratIti maLane toya bahu thaI gayuM. 'huM judo chuM' evI pratIti thAya to ghaNI upakArI. ane tamAre to judAM thaI gayA, e anubhava thayo ! praznakartA : potAno saheja paNa risponsa nA hoya A jJAna pratye, to paNa aMdarathI pratIti jatI nathI. e bahu moTI ajAyabI che. dAdAzrI : nA jAya. A to moTAmAM moTI ajAyabI che. A to varlDamAM nA maLe evI ajAyabI ane be ja kalAkamAM AtmA prApta thAya che. nahIM to vaLI A nokarI karatAM mANaso AtmA pAmatA haze ?! dAdAzrI : khAtarI eTale promisa. A promisa bhaMga thatAM keTalI vAra lAge ? A to pratIti ! ane te kaI pratItimAM tamane besADyA che ? A pratItimAMya nahIM, tamane gADha pratItimAM besADyA che. tIrthakaro avagADha pratItimAM hatA.

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 283 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) 284 jJAnI niraMtara anubhava padamAM ! A jJAna ApIe chIe, te traNa pagathiyethI cothe pagathiye koI Utare nahIM. game evI mArAmArI thaI hoya A ko'kanI joDe, mArAmArI karatAM hoya to ame jANIe ke bhAI, ApaNuM jJAna jatuM rahevAnuM nathI. ko'ka kaheze, A tamArA phalANA bhAI vaDhe che. vaDhI raheze eTale pAcho jAgRta thaI jaze. e vaDhe che, te vaDhanArAneya pAchuM lakSamAM hoya ke A khoTuM thAya che, evuM ApaNuM jJAna che. potAne ema lagADe ke A pAchI gunegArI kyAMthI AvI ? eTale ja mAre vaDhavuM nA paDene, nahIM to badhAne vaDhI vaDhIne mAruM tela nIkaLI jAya. mAruM ApeluM jJAna evuM che e vaDhamavaDhA karato haze to ya ApaNe jANIe ke pratIti jatI rahevAnI nathI. pratItino niraMtara tAra che badhe TheTha sudhI, AkhI lAIphano. eTale pachI kyAM javAno che e ? pratItithI nIce jAva to mithyAtva pharI UbhuM thaI jAya, paNa pratItithI nIce jAya nahIM evuM che A. A to pUruM samajI levAnuM che, eka avatAra ! A jJAnInI sabhA bharAya che, tyAre A vigata samajI levAnI che. nAmuM zIkhavuM hoya to cha mahine, bAra mahine, be varSe, pAMca varSe paNa AvaDI jAya, game teTaluM agharuM hoya to ya. evuM A AmAM saheluM karI nAkhyuM che, tadana saheluM. tamAre kazuM karavAnuM nahIM evuM karI nAkhyuM che paNa have zuM thAya te ? e ya lAbha letA nA AvaDe, tene zuM kare ? chatAM paNa nukasAna javAnuM nathI. mahAtmAonuM sTeja kSAyaka samakita ! praznakartA : dAdA, to pachI A lokone kaI zreNImAM gaNavA ? anubhava, lakSa ane pratIti e traNeyamAM gaNavA ke ? dAdAzrI : A traNathI nIce Utare nahIM, e ApaNuM akrama vijJAna. ane zrImad rAjacaMdra Ane kahyuM ? paramArtha samakita kahyuM. eTale kSAyaka samakita kahyuM. kRpALudeva AtmasiddhimAM bolyA ke, 'varta nija svabhAvanuM, anubhava, lakSa ane pratIta'. te tamane potAnA AtmasvabhAvanI pratIti rahe che ane lakSamAM 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' teya rahe che ane anubhava cetave che teya rahe che. A traNeya zabdanuM varte che. 'vRtti vahe nijabhAvamAM, paramArthe samakita.' vRtti pahelAM je bahAra rakhaDavA mAgatI hatI badhI, je anAdikALathI vRttio bahAra vahetI'tI, Ama karyuM ke tema karuM. tamArI uMmaranAM thayelAM hoya ne, tenI vRttio kyAM jAya ? TheTha phorTamAM jaIne A karIe ke te karIe, kaMI rUpiyA hAthamAM AvyA che, te kazuMka karIe, phalANo dhaMdho karuM, phalANuM karuM, e badhuM baMdha thaIne potAnA svabhAvamAM pAchI pharavA mAMDI vRttio. te have vRttio bahAra nA jAya. pAchI vaLe badhI. UlaTI je bahAra gayelI hoyane, te pAchI vaLe. tamAre pAchI vaLe che ke nathI vaLatI ? pAchI nA vaLe to tamane keDa UbhI thaI jAya. ane ciMtA UbhI thaI to jANavuM ke pAchI nathI vaLatI. A to cittavRttio pAchI phare. bhaTakavA bahAra jatI hatI, e have bhaTakavAnI nahIM. e cittavRttio badhI pAchI pharavA mAMDI. jema sAMja paDe ne gAyo-bheMso badhI pAchI Ave evI rIte A pAchI AvavA mAMDI. peluM savAramAM jAya ane sAMje pAchI Ave evI rIte ajJAnatAthI cittavRtti bhaTake ane jJAnathI pachI bhaTakatI baMdha thaI jAya. saMsAranI vismRti enA jevo koI mokSa nathI. navarI paDI ke vRttio bahAra jAya pharavA. benane tyAM jAya, bhAIne tyAM jAya, Ama jAya, tema jAya, cuMthArA ja karyA kare. ane have navarI paDe to nA jAya ane gaI hoya to pAchI AvatI rahe. praznakartA : eTale pachI vRtti je AtmAmAM hoya e bahAra nIkaLe ja nahIM. dAdAzrI : nA. bahAra nIkaLe ne aMdara hoya, bahAra nIkaLe ne aMdara hoya evuM thayA kare. praznakartA : paNa aMdara vahI jAya pAchI. dAdAzrI : bahAra nIkaLe nahIM e tIrthakarane. paNa ApaNe tyAM sudhI jaI zakIe ke jyAM aMdara-bahAra banne ja rahe.

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 285 286 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : A dAdAnuM jJAna ApeluM che, ene AdhAre che to vRttio bahAra game eTalI jAya to pAchI kheMcAI Ave che ? dAdAzrI : e to Ave ne pAchuM bahAra jAya, te pAchI AvI jAya paNa A ahIMnuM ahIM ATalAmAM rahe, A ApaNI bAunDrImAM ne bAunDrImAM ja rahe. bahAra vepAramAM ja gayelI hoya to pAchI AvatI rahe. A jAgRti rahe ne bIjuM kazuM nahIM. jAgRti ne A ATaluM dAdAnuM moTuM yAda Ave, te ghaDIe pAchA AtmAmAM pesI gayA kahevAya. yAda AvyuM ke mahIM peThuM pAchuM enA gharamAM ! e vRttio bahAra zuM karavA jAya che ? te bahAra bhaTakatI hatI, te sukhanA hAra bhaTakatI hatI. te jyAM tyAM bhaTaka bhaTaka karI sukha khoLe che. vRttio badhI sukhane khoLyA kare. te kyAMya kaMI sukha maLyuM nahIM paNa ahIM to cokhkha-rokaDuM maLe che, pachI zA hAru bahAra bhaTake ? - dareka vastuno niyama evo ke paheluM ApaNane pratIti besI jAya ke A karekTa che. vartanamAM nA hoya. pratIti beThAM pachI ghaNe kALe vartanamAM Ave. A bhaNe che, te bhaNavAmAMya ApaNane pahelI pratIti bese pachI dhIme dhIme anubhava thatA jAya ane pachI vartanamAM AvatuM jAya. mokSa eTale samyaka jJAna, samyak darzana, samyak cAritra. saMsAra Akho mithyA jJAna-darzana-cAritra. jJAta pachI, lakSa ane pratIti rahe Ama.. ame jJAna ApIe chIene, tyAre keTalAMka karmo bhasmIbhUta thaI jAya che. je karmo svarUpane aMtarAyabhUta hoya che, lakSane aMtarAyabhUta hoya che, e badhAM bhasmIbhUta thaI jAya che. lakSanAM aMtarAya tUTI jAya che ane zuddhAtmAnuM ene lakSa besI jAya che. A lakSa e eka prakArano anubhava che. have pratitI to rahe, paNa jeTalI pachI jAgRti hoya eTaluM lakSa rahe. paNa pAchuM lakSa keTaluM rahe ? jAgRti pramANe hoya. e upAdAnanAM AdhAre. e lakSa eTale zuM? tyAre kahe, 'tame ceka lakho, te ghaDIe lakSa nA rahe. game te lakhavAnuM kAma karo, te ghaDIe lakSa rahe nahIM.' to bhagavAna ene gunegAra kahetA nathI. paNa e kAma karI rahyA, jyAre no varka (kAma na hoya) te ghaDIe lakSa rahe. ijha iTa posIbala (e zakya che) ? praznakartA : hA, rahe che. ahIM upAdAna eTale yogyatAne ? dAdAzrI : hA. upAdAna eTale jeTalI jeTalI A mithyAtva dazAmAM dhAraNA kara kara karI ane je karyuM hoya, te mahenata nakAmI to jAya nahIM. nukasAne ya kare ane bIjo phAyado thAyane ! upAdAna to UbhuM thAyane ! eTale e che te yogyatA. koInI yogyatA vadhAre hoya tyAre lakSa vadhAre rahe. yogyatA ochI hoya toya pratIti to jAya nahIM. lakSa to, dareka kAma karatAM rahe, e kAma baMdha thayuM ke lakSa AvI ja jAya. navaro paDyo ke lakSamAM A hoya. 'zuddhAtmA chuM' e lakSa rahe. te lakSa to kramika mArgamAM che. ApaNe tyAM to huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e ene khyAlamAM rahe. praznakartA: 'zuddhAtmA chuM' e lakSamAM rahe. dAdAzrI : e kramika mArgamAM lakSamAM rahe ne ApaNe tyAM khyAlamAM rahe. praznakartA : khyAla ane lakSamAM phera zuM e samajAvo. dAdAzrI : lakSa amuka jagyAe khIle bAMdheluM hoya ane khyAla enIbera(game tyAM) hoya. kAraNa ke kramika mArgamAM kSayopazama AtmA prApta karavAthI ghaDImAM lakSa UDI jAya. lakSamAM eTale eka ja jagyAe hoya ane kSAyaka AtmA prApta karyo che eTale khyAlamAM rahe, lakSa nahIM paNa khyAla. have zuddhAtmA e tamArA khyAlamAM rahe che kharo ? "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM ? praznakartA : TUkaDe TUkaDe khyAlamAM rahe che. dAdAzrI : hA. TUkaDe TUkaDe, kAma pUruM thaI jAya eTale khyAlamAM AvI jAyane ! korTamAM kAma karatA hoya te ghaDIe tamArA khyAlamAM rahene ? praznakartA : huM jyAre bolato houM tyAre lakSa nathI rahetuM paNa sAMbhaLato hou tyAre lakSa rahe che.

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 287 dAdAzrI : keTalAkane to bolato hoya toya khyAla rahyA kare. hareka kAma karatAM khyAla rahe. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e khyAla rahevo eTale ja ApaNA dhyAnamAM rahe ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ane e ja zukladhyAna che. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM dhyAna koIne hoya nahIM. dhyAna rahyuM emAM thoDo anubhava cAkhyA ja kare pAcho. anubhavano svAda AvyA ja kare. jema jema khyAlamAM vadhAre rahe tema anubhava vadhAre utpanna thAya ane khyAlamAM rahyA kare. niraMtara AtmAno anubhava to che ja. jeTalo vakhata pratIti eTalo vakhata anubhava. anubhava vagara to A pratIti bese ja nahIMne ! jJAtIone ta hoya raTaNa ! lakSa nathI hotuM, te ghaDIe pratIti hoya che ja niraMtara. ane pratIti che mATe lakSa pharI Ave che, nahIM to lakSa Ave ja nahIM. eka phero khovAyuM eTale yAda karavuM paDe. A to enI meLe ja AvIne UbhuM rahe che. rAte koI vakhata jAgo cho, tyAre 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e yAda AvI jAya che ne ? hA. eTale e pUrepUruM thaI gayeluM ja che. have tamAre samajavAnI jarUra che, A sAyansa che. eTale bilakula zabdezabda samajavAnI jarUra che. praznakartA : 'huM AtmA chuM' e raTaNa ja vadhAre rahyA kare to sAruM ? dAdAzrI : nA, evuM nahIM. raTaNa to badhuM A saMsAra dazAmAM, sAdhaka dazAmAM karavAnI jarUra. ahIM to e paramAtmA thayo. ame A jJAna ApyA pachI pote paramAtmA thayo, paNa pratItie karIne ! pratIti besI gaI have. khAtrI thaI gaI ke huM caMdubhAI nahIM paNa huM zuddhAtmA ja chuM. e pratIti besI gaI ne lakSa besI gayuM. lakSa eTale niraMtara dhyAnamAM ja rahe ke huM zuddhAtmA chuM. eTale jAgRti badhI utpanna thaI che have. have zuM jarUra che ? eTale bolavAnuM e raTaNa-baTaNa to ahIM ka2vA jevuM nA hoya. A to eka Azcarya che ke A raTaNa karavAnuM ahIM nA hoya, jJAnIomAM raTaNa nA hoyane ! raTaNa e to zabda svarUpa thayuM. 288 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) raTaNa kye sahajatA baMdha ! samakitI jIvane zuM thAya ? 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e bhAna Ave ane pelA bIjA lokone kazuM ThekANuM nA hoya. te ene thoDuM ghaNuM koIvAra khyAla Ave ke A 'huM AtmA chuM', paNa samakitIne to enI meLe Ave. ane smaraNa to karavuM paDe ane enI meLe Ave emAM bahu phera. smaraNa karIe to vismaraNa thAya. vismaraNa thayeluM hoya, tenuM smaraNa karavAnuM. eTale A badhA caDhavAnA rastA che. eTale raTaNa tamAre bolavAnuM nahIM. raTaNa karone, to peluM mULa sahaja baMdha thaI jaze. sahaja mahIM AvatuM, sahejAsaheja Ave, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' lakSa ja rahyA kare. praznakartA : hA, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' enuM lakSa haMmezAM rahyA ja kare che, covIsa klAka. dAdAzrI : e lakSamAM rahyA ja kare ApaNA, lakSamAM rahe. praznakartA : to 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM bolavAnuM nahIM ? dAdAzrI : bolavuM hoya to bolo. nA bolavuM hoya to kaMI jarUra nathI enI. e niraMtara covIsa kalAka lakSamAM ja rahe. roja rAte 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' bolatA bolatA sUI javuM. ane A pAMca AjJA pALavI, bahu thaI gayuM. ahIMthI ja mukti thaI gaI. sarva duHkhono abhAva thaI gayo, saMsArI duHkha aDe nahIM have. sahaja bhAve rahe te sAcuM ! praznakartA : sahaja bhAve AtmAnI dazA mATe dhyAnamAM besavuM ke nA besavuM ? dAdAzrI : sahaja bhAva ja ene kahevAmAM Ave che. kazA prayatna sivAya UMghamAMthI jAgo tyAre tamane 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' Ave che enI meLe ? praznakartA : Ave.

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 289 20 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : enuM nAma sahaja kahevAya ane bIjuM badhuM asahaja kahevAya. A sahaja kahevAya, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' enI meLe ja Ave ane tyAM 'sahajAtmasvarUpa paramaguru'nuM smaraNa Ape che, te yAda Ave ne nAme Ave. e prayatna karavo paDe. ne A to enI meLe Ave e sahaja kahevAya. eTale sahaja tamane thaI gayeluM che. sahajAnmasvarUpa tamAruM thaI gayuM che. tamAro AtmA sahaja thaI gayo che, have dehane sahaja karavAno che. te AjJAthI thaI zake sahaja. banne sahaja thaI gayA, enuM nAma mokSa. varte zukladhyAta re ! 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' enuM niraMtara lakSa rahe che ? praznakartA : niraMtara rahe che, dAdA. dAdAzrI : e AtmadhyAna kahevAya che, e zukladhyAna kahevAya che. bolo, zukladhyAna pratyakSa mokSanuM kAraNa. nahIM to eka ghaDIvAra AtmA yAda nA rahe. eka ajANyo mANasa hato ne, te zuddhAtmA jANI lAvyo. te pachI bIje dA'De che, te manamAM yAda karavA mAMDyo. pelo zabda zuM haze, pelo zabda zuM haze ? pA kalAka sudhI yAda nA AvyuM. e yAdagIrI nathI A. A to sAkSAtkAra che ane abhedatA che. alakhanuM lakSa ! eTale A jagatanuM lakSa bese paNa potAnA svarUpanuM lakSa kyAreya nA bese. evA e alakha niraMjana che. e jJAnI puruSa lakSa besADe. tyAre pachI chUTakAro thAya. nahIM to chUTakAro thAya nahIM ane saMsAranuM lakSa to saheja vAta vAtamAM besI jAya. ApaNe ema kahIe ke A tamArA bhAgIdAra, te bIje dA'De lakSa besI jAya ke A mArA bhAgIdAra AvyA. kaMI cUke-kare nahIM. dA'De paga bhAMgI gayo hoya ane rAte UThatI vakhate tarata lAkaDI yAda Ave. alyA mUA, A eka dA'DAmAM tane kevI rIte yAda AvyuM ke A paga bhAMgI gayo che ? tyAre kahe, "nA, e lakSa besI gayuM." rAte kaheze, 'mArI lAkaDI lAva.' 'alyA, zAnI lAkaDI kaho cho ?" tyAre kahe, 'mAro paga tUTelo che ne !' te mUA, eka dA'DAmAM bhUlI nathI jato ? nA bhUle, enuM nAma lakSa beThuM kahevAya. mATe kAma nIkaLI gayuM have. 'dAdA, dAdA' karyA karo. 'zuddhAtmA, zuddhAtmA' karyA karo. dAdA e ja zuddhAtmA che. ame hau dAdA bhagavAnane namaskAra karyA karIe. e dAdA bhagavAna cauda lokanA nAtha che, pragaTa thayelA che ! anubhava, lakSa ne pratIti traNeya niraMtara rahe che ? eka sekanDa cUkyA vagara, niraMtara lakSa ja rahe che zuddhAtmAnuM, pachI tyAM zuM rahyuM bAkI ? niraMtara lakSa ja rahyA kare, pachI karma zI rIte baMdhAya ? 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM lakSa rahe. e 'huM caMdulAla chuM' evuM lakSa nA rahe. chatAM bhUlI ya nA jAya. koI kaheze, tame caMdulAla cho ? to e bhUlI gayA cho ? tyAre kahe, nA, huM bhUlyo nathI. jema nATakamAM bhartuhari hoya, te bhartuharinuM nATaka bhajave evI rIte A caMdulAlanuM nATaka bhajave. ane bhartuhari aMdarakhAne jANato hoya, ke huM lakSmIcaMda chuM. A aMdara jANatA hoya ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM'. na bhUle "huM vaDApradhAta' ! koI mANasa che te jelamAMthI chUTIne vaDApradhAna thayo, te thayA pachI bhUle nahIM ne rAta-dahADo ke huM vaDApradhAna chuM, nA bhUlene ? te bhUle nahIM eTale enuM kAmeya cUke nahIM. koI prazna pUche ne to huM vaDApradhAna chuM evuM samajIne ja javAba Ape. eTale ApaNe zuddhAtmA thayAne to ApaNe zuddhAtmA samajIne ja javAba ApavAno. je thayA te rUpanuM che A. samajI jAva. karmanA udaya bahAra jora kare te judI vastu che. te to vaDApradhAnaneya jora kare. karmanA udaye koI DhekhALo mAre, koI gALo bhAMDe. e to badhuM karmanA udaya to emaneya che ne paNa e emanI pharaja bajAve vaDApradhAna tarIkenI. evI ApaNe zuddhAtmAnI pharaja bajAvavI paDe. ethI karIne pote 'caMdubhAI chuM" e badhuM bhUlI nA jAya. ema kaMI bhUle pAlave ? badhuM lakSamAM ja hoyane !

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 291 kramika mArgamAM keTalo prayatna kare tyAre AtmAnuM lakSa khyAlamAM Ave. e lakSa to bese ja nahIM. e pote lakSamAM rAkhyA kare. jema ApaNe dhaMdho hoyane, dhaMdhAnI bAbata lakSamAM rAkhavAnI hoyane ? evuM AtmAne lakSamAM rAkhyA kare, Avo che AtmA. te ene pratIti bese tyAre AvuM lakSamAM rahI zakAya, ene guNa para pratIti bese. bAkI A ApaNo to AtmAnubhava kahevAya. kAraNa ke sahajatA enuM nAma anubhava kahevAya, je enI meLe prApta thAya. ane prayatna karavo paDe, enuM nAma anubhava nahIM. kramikamAM emane pratIti e badhuM karavuM paDe. pratItimAM prayatna karavo paDe. tamAro AtmA anubhaveya tamArI draSTie sAco che, khoTo nathI. paNa aMza anubhava che. ane akramathI tamane sahaja prApta thayelo chene, te tamane emAM lAbha thAya, paNa haju pragati mAMDaze ne tema anubhava vadhato jaze. jema jema jAgRti utpanna thAya tyAra pachI AkhI vAta samajavI paDe. paricayamAM rahI ane jJAna samajI levAnuM che badhuM. saMpUrNa anubhava zAthI nahIM ? Aja pratIti rUpe kema rahyuM ? A saMpUrNa anubhava kema nahIM ? saMpUrNa pratIti, saMpUrNa jJAna ane saMpUrNa anubhava traNeya rahevuM joIe. tyAre kahe, "nA. e saMpUrNa anubhava raheto nathI, saMpUrNa jJAnaya rahetuM nathI, pratIti saMpUrNa rahe che. kAraNa ke A tamAre phAIlano nikAla karavAno che ! cho zuddhAtmA paNa A dazA tamArI aMtarAtmA thaI." tyAre kahe, 'kema ema ?" tyAre kahe, 'phAIlono nikAla bAkI che.' phAIlonA nikAla pUrA thaI raheze eTale tamAre phula gavarmenTa. phAIlone lIdhe A badhuM aTakyuM che. | 'vardhamAna samati thaI, TALe mithyAbhAsa' eTale je kSAyaka samakti tamane thayuM, te paNa vardhamAna thayA kare. pratIti pUrI thaI gaI eTale anubhavamAM Ave. te anubhava vadhato jAya tema mithyAbhAsa lAge eTale je vakIlano dhaMdho tame pUjA karIne karatA hatA, te dhaMdho UlaTo mithyA lAge. tame chokarAnA bApa thayA, choDIonA bApa thayA, e badhuM mithyA lAge chene ! AbhAsita mAtra. mithyA ekaluM nahIM, mithyA AbhAsa ! 292 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : eTale dAdA, vastu mithyA dekhAya eTale pachI e saheje chUTavA mAMDe ? dAdAzrI : chUTI ja gayuM. mithyA dekhAyuM e chUTI gayuM. yathArtha anubhavatI khAtrI ! praznakartA : jANuM yathArtha kyAre kahI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : anubhavamAM Ave tyAra pachI ja yathArtha jANyuM kahevAya. praznakartA : e anubhava yathArtha ja che enI khAtarI zuM, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe ahIM jJAna Ape chene, tyAre anubhava Taca thAya che eTale pratIti bese che. paNa saMpUrNa anubhava nA kahevAya. tyAre duniyAno kAyado evo che ke dareka vastunI pahelAM pratIti bese. kaMI paNa tame samajaNa pADo ke, 'bhaI, AvI jAtanI kasarata karavAthI tamane zarIra ne badhuM sAruM thaI jaze.' e sAMbhaLatAM ja, e sAruM sAMbhaLane barobara paddhatisaranuM to enI pratIti besI jAya. ane pratIti bese eTale pote enI kriyA zarUAta kare. ane zarUAta kare tyAra pachI ene anubhava thAya, pachI e jANyuM kahevAya. pachI e bIjAne jaNAvI zake. pratIti beThelI hoya ne jaNAve, emAM bhalIvAra nA hoya. eTale A pratIti beThA pachI tamane anubhavamAM Ave tyAra pachI e je darzana hatuM, tenuM badhuM jJAna thatuM jAya. praznakartA : anubhavanI kakSA kevI rIte ApaNe jANI zakIe ? dAdAzrI : jeTalI bAbatamAM duniyA ApaNane asara nA kare, te e anubhava kakSA pUrI thaI gaI. ane jeTalI bAbatamAM jyAM jyAM asara kare, te haju kakSA bAkI rahI che. praznakartA : dAdA, asara na kare e kharekhara AtmA jANyAnA kAraNe che ke anya koI kAraNe udAsInabhAva jAgavAthI e vastu banelI che. dAdAzrI : keTaluMka AtmA jANavAne lIdhe thoDuMka e phITa thAya che.

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti pachI thoDoka anubhava thAya che ne, tyAra pachI amuka bhAga baMdha thaI jAya che ane anubhava kAco hoya te bhAga haju kAco rahI jAya che. 293 praznakartA : enuM koI tharmomiTara kharuM ke Ama AgaLa vadhI rahyA che ke nahIM, e jANavA mATenuM ? dAdAzrI : e tharmomiTara to AtmA ja che. e kahI Ape ke, 'haju barobara nathI. ATale sudhI anubhava barobara che.' AtmA tharmomiTaranI mAphaka kAma karyA ja kare che. praznakartA H pratIti plasa AjJA eTale anubhavanI dazA Avene ? dAdAzrI : ame je bAbatanI AjJA ApIe, teTalA pUratI anubhavamAM Ave. badhI bAbatamAM AjJA anubhavamAM nA Avene ! praznakartA H badhI bAbatamAM AjJA anubhavamAM nA Ave, e kaI draSTie ? dAdAzrI : e to je AjJA karI hoyane, te amuka eka kornaranI hoya. e kornara phITa thAya. bIjI jagyAe phITa nA thAya ne ! mAra mAre, lUMTI le, toya rAga-dveSa nA thAya e enuM tharmomiTara. tharmomiTara joIene ! raDe teno vAMdho nathI. rAga-dveSa na thavAM joIe. jo koIne mArIe ane e raDe e to deha suMvALo hoya to raDe ane deha kaThaNa hoya to e hase, e jovAnuM nathI. ApaNe rAga-dveSa gayA ke nahIM ? praznakartA : to dAdA, eno artha evo thayone koI ApaNane gALa de ane ApaNuM moDhuM bagaDI jAya, paNa aMdara enA pratye rAga-dveSa nA thAya. dAdAzrI : e haju kacAza che. pachI to moDhuM paNa nahIM bagaDe. atyAre moDhuM bagaDe eno vAMdho nahIM. raDe toya vAMdho nahIM. mAra sahana nA thato hoya ne raDato hoya toya vAMdho nahIM. praznakartA : moDhuM bagaDI jAya che e nabaLAI che ? dAdAzrI : nabaLAI ja ne ! tyAre bIjuM zuM ? 294 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) zuddhAtmA rUpa kyAre thavAya ? eka mANasa mane pUchato'to, ''dAdA, mane Akho dahADo 'zuddhAtmA chuM' ema bhAna rahe che paNa te rUpa mArAthI thavAtuM nathI haju.' alyA, zAno te rUpa thavA phare che ! haju to tane pratIti beThI che, ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM'. pratIti bese eTale zuM thAya, e aMdara je bIja hatA te badhAM baLI gayA. e pharI navA UgavAlAyaka rahyAM nahIM. paNa have niveDo to Avavo joIene pAchalAM bIjano. te pAchalAM bIjamAMthI phaLa ApIne jAya pachI. te jeTalAM phaLa ApIne jAya, teTaluM anubhavajJAna pragaTa thAya. pratItimAMthI pachI AgaLa vadhe. eTale anubhavajJAna kyAre pragaTa thAya ? tyAre kahe, kaDavAM-mIThAM phaLa Ave, emAM samatA rahe che evuM ene anubhavajJAna hoya. vItarAgatA rahe che, e anubhavajJAna thAya tema tema jJAna pragaTa thatuM jAya. anubhavajJAna pragaTa thayA pachI vartanamAM Ave, tyAre tuM saMpUrNa zuddhAtmA thaI jaIza. jyAM sudhI mAla bharelo che e nIkaLI jAya tyAre vartanamAM Ave, ema ne ema kaMI AvatuM haze ? ApaNe hasavuM hoya ne loTa phAkIe beu sAthe bane ? kAM to hasI le, kAM to loTa phAkI le. lakSaNo AtmAnubhava taNAM ! praznakartA : ekavAra jo AtmAno anubhava sthira thaI jAya pachI kaMI bAkI nA rahe. dAdAzrI : hA. sthira ja thaI jAya. pachI Akho dA'Doya sthira ja rahe. eka kalAka ja nahIM, Akho divasa, niraMtara sthira rahe. praznakartA H zuddhAtmAnI anubhUti zI rIte thAya ? dAdAzrI : hamaNAM eka bhAI evuM pUchavA AvyA hatA tamArA jevuM, mane kahe che, 'AtmAno anubhava haju barobara jevo joIe evo thato nathI'. tyAre meM kahyuM, 'mahIM cetavanAra cetave che tane ?" tyAre kahe, 'e to Akho dahADoya cetave che.' tyAre meM kahyuM, 'jJAna lIdhA pahelAM cetavato hato ?" tyAre kahe, 'nA, koI cetavato na hato.' tyAre meM kahyuM, "e ja

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 295 ra96 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) cetana cetave che.' te AtmAno anubhava Akho dahADo juo cho to kharA. mUA, Akho dahADo AtmAno anubhava rahe che. cetavanAra cetave che ke nathI cetavato ? e cetana cetave che. pahelAM cetana hoya nahIM ne cetaveya nahIM koI bApoya. cetave che ne cetana ? zuM kahe che te ? praznakartA: hA, cetave che. dAdAzrI : have A e ja anubhava vaLI. cetana cetave che, e pahelAM cetavato hato ? pahelAM koI cetavatuM ja nahotuMne ! A ja anubhava ! praznakartA : e anubhUtimAM pravRtti zuM karavI ? dAdAzrI: pAMca AjJA pALo eTale badhI jokhamadArI mArI, tamane mokSe laI javAnA eka avatAramAM. caitanya vijJAna che te mahIM cetave. Akho dahADo cetava cetava kare ApaNane ! ApaNe jarA baphamamAM hoIe toya e cetave. tamane koI dahADo baneluM ? ApaNe baphamamAM hoIe to cetave evuM ? praznakartA : hA. to paNa cetave. dAdAzrI : haM. to e koNa ? tyAre kahe, e AtmAno anubhava. niraMtara Akho dahADo AtmAno anubhava rahe evuM A akrama vijJAna che. nahIM to jagate AtmAno anubhava joyelo te kevo ? paDachAyA svarUpa. paDachAyo jue tethI vastu nathI joI. paDachAyo joyo, have vastu joI nathI, AbhAsa, basa. have e AbhAsa mAtra ane A to phekTa vastu. niraMtara cetavatAro koNa ? Apelo AtmA sAco e ja che ke bIjo haze ? praznakartA : e karekTa vastu ApelI che. dAdAzrI : e to joDe joDe hoya, temAM A ke pelo e zuM khabara paDe ? badhA AtmA joDe joDe hoya, emAM kayo AtmA kharo ? kharo AtmA nA hoya to mahIMthI cetavaNI baMdha thaI jAya. jagatamAM to A lokoya AtmA kahe paNa ene koI bApeya cetave nahIM. eTale pachI mUMjhAya ke A zuM che ? te ghaDIe ahIM sAmo risponsa (pratibhAva) nA hovo joIe ? tamane mahIM eno risponsa lAge che ne ? e risponsa Ape che ne ? risponsa nA Ape to pachI ApaNe kone tyAM ghaMTaDI vagADIe ? ghumAvyA ja karone ghaMTa ! ghaMTa saMbhaLAya ne avAja saMbhaLAya. pelo hato tevo ne tevo. mULa e pheraphAra thayo. ane risponsa Ape to ja enI joDe kAma thAya. nahIM to tame mane risponsa nA Apo to huM tamArI joDe keTalo vakhata "caMdubhAI, caMdubhAI' karyA karuM? tamAre khabhe hAtha nAkha nAkha karuM, emAM svAda maLe mane ? ane tame risponsa Apo ke 'kema mane aDyA ?" to huM jANuM ke haM, risponsa Ape che. praznakartA : cetavanAro ane cetanAro banne eka nathI ? dAdAzrI : eka ja che ne ! paNa e atyAre A cetanAro ja che. cetavanAro jAgaze ne tyAre eka thaze. jAge pachI che te pelAne cetave, 'e nahIM, Ama Ava, Ama Ava'. cetavanAra cetanArane kahe che, "Ama nahIM, Ama pAcho Ava'. A potAnI vRttio rUpI je che cetana, tene pAchuM bolAve che. praznakartA: cete che koNa? dAdAzrI : e pelI vRttio che te. je bheguM thanAra che te. praznakartA : to eka koNa thAya che ? konI sAthe ? dAdAzrI : e pote potAnI sAthe ja eka thAya che. praznakartA : eTale cetanAro, cetavanAra sAthe eka thAya che ? dAdAzrI : haM. cetavanAranI sAthe cetanAro eka thAya che ane cetanAro kyArathI thayo ke jyAre pote ene risponsa Apyo. tyArathI e cetanAro thayo. tyAM sudhI cetanAro hato ja nahIM. koI koInI bAteya sUNatuM na hatuM.

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 297 298 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : risponsa eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : risponsa eTale A eNe kahyuM ke "Ama', eTale pelo kahe, 'hA, barobara, rAITa.' te sAIDa pharyo eTale e rAITa bilipha thaI. pahelAM pelI roMga bilipha thaI hatI, have rAITa bilipha thaI. praznakartA : eTale cetavanAra pAse rAITa bilipha ApanA thakI prApta thAya che ? dAdAzrI : evuM chene, mULa ene A roMga bilipha che, to rAITa bilipha kaI ? te ApaNe khyAla ApIe eTale ene rAITa bilipha besI jAya che, draSTi pharI jAya che. jema huM tamane Ama pheravI nAkhuM, eTale tamArI draSTi pharI jAyane pachI tame kaho ke "pahelAM A to na hatuM. A to dariyo dekhAya che badho.' e pachI risponsa Ave che. praznakartA: haM...., eTale pheravanAra nimitta joIe. dAdAzrI : e to nimitta ja che, nimitta ! praznakartA : e koNa, jJAnI puruSa hovA ghaTe ? dAdAzrI : hA, te bIjuM koNa ? e to je jANato hoya, te ja nimitta bane. jANato hoya te ja kahene ! praznakartA : AmAM 'mULa AtmA' kyAM rahyo to pachI ? dAdAzrI : che ne, mULa AtmA to tyAM ja che e. mULa AtmA to AmAM koI kArya ja nathI bhajavato. mULa AtmAmAMthI judI paDelI je zakti, prajJAzakti A badhuM kAma kare che. e kAma pUruM thaI jaze eTale e zakti enI mahIM pAchI tanmayAkAra thaI jAya che. praznakartA : eTale cetavanAra koNa AmAM rahyuM ? dAdAzrI : e che ke A prajJAzakti, paNa ApaNe AtmA kahone ! ene AtmA ja kahevo joIe. praznakartA : ane cetanAra koNa thayuM to pachI ? dAdAzrI : mahIM A je juduM paDyuM hatuM te vRttio, bilipha ! bilipha judI paDI'tI. praznakartA : e cetanAranuM astitva pudgala kahI zakAya ? dAdAzrI : pudgala nahIM. praznakartA : to A vRttio pudgala svarUpa nathI ? dAdAzrI : e bilipha che, e biliphathI pudgala UbhuM thAya che. e cetavanArAne chUTako ja nahIMne ! e to dhaMdho laIne beTho che. eTale enI pharaja che ke ene have laI javAno mokSa. A roMga bIlipho che te, e khasI gaI. eTale have pelAne che te cetavavuM ja paDe. praznakartA : have e anubhava vartanamAM Avaze tyAre cetavanAro ane cetanAro eka thaze ? dAdAzrI : thaI ja javAnA e to enI meLe. vartanamAM AvyuM e ja pUrNa thayuM. pelA vartana sahitanA che ne A vartana rahitanA che. praznakartA e vartana rahita che, tyAM sudhI ja cetavanAro ane cetanAro judA che ? dAdAzrI : haM. jJAtA-draSTApadane cetavatAro ! praznakartA : jayAM jJAtA-draSTApaNuM che tyAM pachI cetavAnI vastu ja kyAM rahI ? dAdAzrI : paNa jJAtA-draSTapaNuM nA hoya tyAre cetavene, ke Ama nA hoya. praznakartA : hA. to e sTeja kaI kahevAya ? je cetavAnI sTeja che e kaI sTeja kahevAya ?

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 299 3% AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : e udayakarmane AdhIna dhakko vAge ne chUTI jAya pAchuM. te ghaDIe "ceta' kahene ! pachI tyAM AgaLa lAve pAchuM. cetavanAra che ne paNa, 'ceta' nA kahe to kAcuM paDI jAya. praznakartA : barAbara che. paNa A mULa sTeja nA kahevAyane ! dAdAzrI : mULanI kyAM vAta rahI, e to cetavanAra nA hoya to kAcA paDI jaIe. mULa sTeja AvyA pachI kazuM karavAnuM rahetuM ya nathIne ! jJAtA-draSTAmAM jeTaluM rahevAya che eTaluM rahe che. bIjI aDacaNone lIdhe nathI rahevAtuM. to paNa cetavIneya paNe tyAM pAchAM avAya che. bIjA aMtarAyo hoyane ! bAkI jJAtA-draSTA rahyA pachI aMtarAya nA hoya. tene to kazuM bAkI ja nathIne ! aMtarAya hoya tene cetavAnuM. praznakartA : A je cetavavAnI sTeja che ne, e loMga TAIma sudhI cAle che. mULa vastu judI che, tema chatAM e cAlyA ja kare che. dAdAzrI : e cAlyA kare. e cAlyA karavAnuM che. temAM ApaNe vadhAre jora karavAnuM che ne ! avaLuM che ene savaLuM karavAnuM chene ! praznakartA have AmAM potAnAmAM tanmayAkAra ene potAne thavuM che. to enAM badhAM bAraNAM baMdha thaI jAya che. je potAnuM jJAna jANavAnuM che, te ToTalI klojha thaI jAya che. AgaLanI sTejamAM nathI avAtuM. dAdAzrI : evuM che, bIjI pratIti bese evI nathI, e ja pUrNAhuti. pratItinI pUrNAhuti karavAnI che. bIjI kazI pUrNAhuti karavAnI nathI. A AcAra-bAcAranI pUrNAhuti karavAnI nathI. ane pratIti bIjI nahIM bese ! eTale mahIM chone mAthAkUTa karato hoya, teya jo jo karyA karavuM. buddhine nA pesavA devI, nahIM to buddhi mANasane jaMpavA detI nathI. praznakartA : buddhi to bahu herAna kare che. dAdAzrI : hA, e pratItinAM bAraNAM vAsI de. pratItinA daravAjA baMdha karAvI de. nahIM to have bIjI kaMI pratIti bese evuM che ja nahIM. pachI ethI vadhAre zuM joIe te ? AtmAnI ArAdhanA e to niraMtara anubhavavAnI vastu che. AtmAno anubhava to niraMtara raheto ja hoya. mahIM cetave che te ja AtmA. cetave che kharo ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : pahelAM koI cetavatuM na hatuM, te ajJAna hatuM. have mahIM cetave che, "eya, Ama Ama'. cetave che ne ? praznakartA : emAM lobha eka rahe che te pratyakSa jovo che. dAdAzrI : hai ? e akSavALI jovAnI cIja na hoya. akSa eTale AMkhathI. e AMkhathI dekhAya evI cIja nahIMne ? e anubhavI zakazo. A sAkara jo tamArA moDhAmAM mUkazuM eTale tame kaho, have samajAI gayuM. basa, chevaTe samajI javAnI jarUra. pratIti bese, enuM nAma joyo. Ama AMkhathI nahIM paNa pratIti bese, pachI lakSa bese, enuM nAma jANyo. ane pachI vItarAgatA rahe, enuM nAma anubhava. eTale pahele dahADethI ja pratIti besI jAya che, te ghaDIe joI lIdho hoya che AtmAne to ! TekAAta vitA tahIM pUrNAhuti ! praznakartA : pratIti rahe che, pachI e anubhava mATe tyAM khUTe che zuM? dAdAzrI : e je dazA thaI rahe, enA mATe jarUriyAta je jJAna che e khUTe che. jarUriyAta eTale TekAjJAna, A badhI vAto huM kahuM chuM ne e badhuM TekAjJAna kahevAya. enA AdhAre badhuM tamane anubhava prApta karAve. praznakartA eTale e TekAjJAnamAM jJAnakaLA ane bodhakaLA e vastu Ave. dAdAzrI : TekAjJAna to ApaNe zabda Apyo. bAkI TekAjJAna jevuM hotuM nathI, paNa e tamane helpa kare. anubhava thavAmAM A jJAna khUTe che. praznakartA : eTale darzana pUrNatAvALuM che paNa vacce A TekAjJAnanI jarUra che.

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anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 301 302 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : TekANA nathI tethI A anubhava ene phITa thato nathI. eNe evuM sAMbhaLyuM hoya, "je banyuM e ja karekTa', dAdA kahetA'tA, to ene evuM banI jAya to peluM TekAjJAna ene kAma lAge to anubhava thAya. praznakartA eTale A vAkya TekAjJAna kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : TekAjJAna to ApaNe nAma pADyuM. bAkI enuM mULa haze peluM jJAna. e A hoya to anubhava thAya. tethI ame vAto karIene badhI AvI badhI. praznakartA : have enI pAse darzanamAM zuM hatuM te ghaDIe ? dAdAzrI darzana to che haju. darzananI jAgRti pUrI che. praznakartA : Aje darzanamAM kaI vigata che enI pAse ? dAdAzrI : darzanamAM ene potAne jAgRtivALuM darzana che ane te pratIti che e. darzana eTale pratIti, pachI bIjuM kazuM joIe nahIM. praznakartA : eTale 'zuddhAtmA chuM' e pratIti ? dAdAzrI : e badhuM ya, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM', A zuM che? te zuM che? badhI ya ene pratitI hoya. paNa Ane anubhava nA thavA de, TekAjJAna sivAya. 'bhogave enI bhUla' sAMbhaLyuM ne pachI che te jyAre bhogavavAnuM thAya ne tyAre ene anubhava thaI jAya ke bhUla to ApaNI ja che. kharekhara vAta sAcI che. paNa evI vAta sAMbhaLI nA hoya to ? phITa nA thAya. te ghaDIe buddhi jora kare ke have AvuM A nyAya kahevAto haze ? eTale TekAjJAna amArI pAse sAMbhaLyuM hoya to bahu helpa kare. e to joDe besa besa karyA hoya, te sAMbhaLe. A bhogave enI bhUla to A ajJAnI mANaso ya pakaDI lene, toya enuM gADuM cAlu thaI jAya. ane pachI anubhava thAya ke nA, vAta sAcI che. ene hau anubhava thAya. e vyavahAramAM anubhavI kahevAya badhA ane AmAM AtmAnA anubhavI. 'bhogave enI bhUla' eTale ene kazI bhUla thaI gaI eTale tarata ja A zabdo yAda Ave eTale pachI tarata hisAba kADhe ke ohoho ! mArA hAthamAM zuM hatuM ? A to kaMIka hisAba ja hato lAge che. to pachI anubhava jJAna thaI gayuM ene. praznakartA : eTale AtmAnI jAgRti che, paNa AtmAno anubhava thavA mATe A TekAjJAnanI jarUra che. dAdAzrI : "huM AtmA chuM' e to anubhavamAM AveluM ja che ne ! dehAdhyAsano anubhava tUTyo ne A Avyo. praznakartA : A pratItirUpe Avyo che ne ? dAdAzrI : game te rIte, paNa che ne anubhava ? have to A AgaLano anubhava to jJAna pragaTa thavAne mATe che. eka phero anubhavamAM AvI gayuM eTale pachI kAyamane mATe jJAna pragaTa thaI gayuM. praznakartA eTale evI rIte prasaMge prasaMge navA jJAnanI jarUra paDe kharI ? dareka judA judA prasaMge ? dAdAzrI : hA, e to joIe ja ne ! badhuM joIe to kharuM ne paNa ? jeTalA prakAranAM jJAna eTalA prakAranA paryAya badhA. praznakartA : Ape peluM kaheluM ke dareka gUMcanI pAchaLa ajJAna hoya che. eTale e gUMcanA solyuzana mATe kaMIka jJAnanI jarUra hoya ja che. e dareka vakhate juduM juduM eTale e jJAna pragaTa thavAnI vAta che ne ? dAdAzrI : haM. anubhava pramANa AtmA. have tamAro anubhava vadhato jaze, tema tamAro AtmA pragaTa thato jaze. AtmA keTalo pragaTa thayo ? tyAre kahe, anubhava pramANa ! anubhava kone ? praznakartA: AtmAnubhava kone thAya che? AmAM anubhava karanAra koNa ? dAdAzrI: 'potAne ja thAya che. A ajJAnathI je bhrAMti UbhI thaI hatI te jatI rahe che ne astitvapaNuM pAchuM ThekANe AvI jAya che. 'huM

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304 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) e zabdo dAdAnAM che, Azaya dAdAno che, eTale badhuM helpa kare. praznakartA : paNa sAkSAt paricaya ne AmAM phera ne ? dAdAzrI : e to phera gaNavA jAya to badhAmAM phera hoya. mATe ApaNe to je vakhate je AvyuM te karavuM. dAdA nA hoya tyAre zuM karavuM ? dAdAnuM pustaka che te vAMcavuM. pustakamAM dAdA ja che ne ! nahIM to AMkho mIMcIe ke tarata dAdA dekhAya ! anubhava - lakSa - pratIti 303 caMdubhAI chuM' e bhAna 'jene' hatuM, tene huM e bhAna choDAvuM chuM ne 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM'nuM tene ja bhAna thAya che. je sUkSmatama ahaMkAra che ke jeno phoTo nA paDI zake, je AkAza jevo che, tene anubhava thAya che. eTale e ahaMkAra ja anubhava karanAro che. pachI ahaMkAra vilaya thaI jAya che, pachI 'prajJA" UbhI thAya. 'ajJA'nI sattA UDI jAya che. praznakartA anubhava pAmanAra ne anubhava janAra e be judA ke eka ? dAdAzrI : beu ekanA eka ja. dekhyo te eka ne pAmyo te eka, beu ekanA eka. ahaMkArane jo anubhava nA thAta to e kahetA ke mane anubhava nA thayo ne anubhava thAya eTale prajJAne sattA soMpI de ke A tamArI gAdI. anubhava pAmyo ne anubhava joyo, te beu ekanA eka ! jJAna-darzana e ja parama jayoti ! thiyareTikala e anubhava nA kahevAya, e to samaja kahevAya ane prekTikala e anubhava che. samaja pUrNa ne anubhava pUrNa, enuM nAma jayoti. e ja jyoti, e ja jJAna, e ja paramAtmA. praznakartA: paNa e ApanI sAthe rahIe, tyAre ja samaja Avene ?! dAdAzrI : jema jema paricaya vadhato jAya tema tema prakAza vadhato jAya. ane paricaya vadhyo joDe rahIne, enuM nAma anubhava. praznakartA : dAdAjI, zraddhA ne paricayamAM phera ? dAdAzrI : paricayathI zraddhA bese, paNa zraddhA beThA pachI paNa paricaya vadhe tema pachI pAcho anubhava thAya. vadhArAnA paricayathI zraddhA besI e pachI paricaya zuM kAma kare ? tyAre kahe, anubhava thatAM jAya. mATe paricayamAM rahevuM. praznakartA : dAdAjI, paricayamAM nA rahevAya to pustako keTalI helpa kare ? dAdAzrI : badhuM helpa kare. badhI A ahIMnI dareka cIja dAdAnI,

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[5] cAritramoha vyAkhyA darzanamoha taNI ! praznakartA : darzanamoha zene kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : darzanamoha to ene kahevAya ke je sAcuM nathI chatAM ene sAcuM manAvaDAve che. jagata zuM kahe che, nathI tene che manAvaDAve. nA, paNa tyAre mUA, nathI evuM kema kahevAya, dekhAya che UghADuM ? paNa tame caMdubhAI sAcA nathI, kharekhara tame nathI chatAMya tamane manAvaDAve, ke nA, tame caMdubhAI ja cho, e darzanamoha. pachI tame pote deha nathI, chatAM A deha te huM ja chuM, kaheze. praznakartA : enuM mAlikIpaNuM dharAve. dAdAzrI : 'huM chuM" AvyuM eTale mAlikI hoya ja. AnuM nAma darzanamoha. 'huM chuM" chUTe eTale mAlikIpaNuM chUTe. A darzanamoha chUTe to A jagatamAM mANasa chUTe, nahIM to koI dA'Doya mukti thAya nahIM. amane bhegA thAya, ene kahIe ke caMdubhAI, tame joya. tyAre kahe, 'huM ja caMdubhAI. AvuM kevuM bolo cho ?' 'are bhaI, hoya tame caMdubhAI. caMdubhAI to tamAruM nAma che A.' 'tyAre ene zaMkA paDe. vAta to sAcI che. nAma to mAruM caMdubhAI, tyAre huM koNa ?" e tyAra pachI dAdA dekhADe. 306 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) tyAre pahelo darzanamoha chUTe. AMdhaLA pATA laIne pharato hato, te have dekhato thAya. te darzanamoha tuTyo. pachI dekhAvA mAMDyuM. tyAre loka kahe che, 'kema ATaluM badhuM paheryuM che tame ? ATalo badho moha ?" e tamane nahIM khabara paDe ke A moha che, paNa te A cAritramoha che. eTale pahelAM je moha bhAva karelA, tenuM A phaLa AvyuM. A IphekTa che, noTa kaoNjha. kaoNjhIjha baMdha thaI gayA. jenA kaoNjha baMdha thaI gayA, eno mokSa thayo. praznakartA : dAdA, paNa kaI rIte darzanamoha chUTe ? dAdAzrI : bIjo koI rasto nahIM, jJAnI puruSa choDAvI Ape tyAre. darzanamoha eTale zuM ? Ama badhuM jue che, tene badale pAchalI bAju jue. e draSTi pheravI Ape, jJAnI puruSa. potAnI meLe phare nahIM. A saMsAra draSTi che ane pAchaLa AtmadraSTi che. te AtmA bhaNI draSTi karI Ape. pachI che te ene samajAI jAya ke A huM chuM. vyAkhyA cAritramoha taNI ! ane cAritramoha eTale zuM ke darzanamohane laIne je je bIja nAkhelAM, khetarAmAM vAvI AvelA, e have che te darzanamoha gayo chatAM peluM AnuM laNavAnuM rahyuM. te game nahIM ke, A sAluM nahatuM AmAM sukha ! te ApaNe kyAM A badhuM AvyuM ? enuM nAma cAritramoha. khetaramAM bIja nAkhe te ja darzanamoha ane choDavo Uge, phaLa AvatAM sudhI e badho cAritramoha. A jagata AkhuM darzanamohathI phasAyeluM che. darzanamoha jAya to kSAyaka samati thAya, paNa cAritramoha rahe. kSAyaka samaktinI vyAkhyA ! zAstro kahe che ke atyAre A kALamAM kSAyaka samakita na thAya. to darzanamoha jAya kharo ? keTalA pramANamAM ? tyAre kahe, cAra anaMtAnubaMdhI ane eka mithyAtvamohanIya ne eka mizramohanIya. ane sAtamI samyakatvamohanIya khape, tyAre te kSAyaka samakita thAya. samyatvamohanIya A kALamAM na khape.

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cAritramoha 307 tethI kRpALudevane lokoe kahyuM ne ke tame kaho cho kSAyaka samakita, tamane thayuM che paNa ame mAnatA nathI. tyAre kRpALudeva kahe che, 'bhale e nA mAne to emanI rIta che paNa ame to mAnIe ja chIe'. ane ApaNuM to opana Tu skAya che. ApaNuM to kevaLajJAna che A to. paNa pacyA vagaranuM kevaLajJAna che ane kSAyaka samakita pacyuM che. AnI vAta ja kyAM thAya ?! A to itihAsa bahu moTo lakhAze AnI parathI to ! moTAmAM moTuM jabarajasta Azcarya gaNAze ! praznakartA : te akrama mArganI aMdara jJAnInA jJAnathI darzanamoha nIkaLI jAya che evo ghaNAMne anubhava thAya che. dAdAzrI : ame jJAna ApIe tyAre darzanamoha savaze khalAsa thaI jAya che. savaze darzanamoha khalAsa thavuM, enuM nAma kSAyaka samakita. pachI pyora cAritramohanIya rahI. upazama samakita thayuM hoya to mArAthI tamane pyaoNra nA kahevAya. e icyaoNra kahevuM paDe. ahIM to kSAyaka samakita che, bhAvakarma bilakula khalAsa thaI gayuM che ! 308 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) 'karma mohanIya bheda be, darzana-cAritra nAma, haNe bodhavItarAgatA.' jJAnIpuruSanAM bodhathI darzanamohanIya haNAI jAya ane vItarAgatAthI cAritramohanIya jAya. cAritramohanIya hoya, paNa vItarAgatA rahe eTale aDe nahIM. vItarAgatA ene nAza karI nAkhe. A jAyaphaLa hoyane, te upara kocaluM kADhyA pachI jAyaphaLa gaNAya. nahIM to jAyaphaLa ema ne ema moDhAmAM nAkhIe to ? eTale A mohanuM kocaluM che AkhuM, tyAM sudhI cAritramoha nA kahevAya. darzanamohanuM kocaluM kADhe to je bAkI rahyo e cAritramoha, have darzanamohanuM jeNe kocaluM kADhyuM eTale kSAyaka samyakatva thaI gayuM. paNa e kocaluM te kADhavuM paDe. ema ne ema cAritramoha kahIe, eno artha ja nahIMne ! jyAM sudhI darzanamoha gayo nathI, tyAM sudhI kayo moha ? pAko moha. mULa hakIkatamAM zuM che ? tyAre kahe, badho moha che. A paccIsa prakAranA moha ane pachI A mithyAtvamoha, mizramoha, samyatvamoha, emAMthI amuka bhAga enuM kocaluM je chene, uparanuM kavara e darzanamoha UDI jAya tyAra pachI rahyo cAritramoha, kADhavo moha to jaDamULathI ja ! darzanamoha gayo nathI to ene cAritramoha nA kahevAya, e to moha ja kahevAya. bhale koIne ocho hoya ke vadhAre hoya. ane game eTalo moha ocho karyo hoyane, A ATalo ja nAno hoyane to ene saheja pANI chAMTIe to AvaDo moTo thAya. mohane vadhatAM keTalI vAra ? agnijALa jevo. sapATAbaMdha pharI vaLe cogaradama. eTale ko'ka kaheze, meM moha ocho karyo. mUA, ocho nathI karavAno, jaDamULathI kADhI nAkha. te A to tamAro moha ame jaDamULathI kADhI nAkhelo. tyAre A zuM Ave che, atyAre moha thAya che te ? tyAre kahe, A to pahelAM moha karelA, te kAgaLiyA laI laIne Ave che ke bhaI, tame amane ATalI zarta karI'tI. have te to pALavI ja paDene ? moha kADhyo eno, pahelAM je moha karelo, tenAM rahyo bAkI te cAritramoha zAstramAM kahyuMne AtmAnA dravya, guNa, paryAyane je jANe teno nizcaya karIne moha nAza pAme. to tame dravya, guNa, paryAyane jANyA eTale tamAro nizcaya karIne moha to UDI gayo. vyavahAramoha rahyo eTale cAritramoha rahyo. moha ocho thayelo pahelAM karatAM khabara paDe ? pelo cIkaNo moha nahIMne have ? kazuM choDavAnuM nahIM. choDavuM ne nA choDavuM beu sarakhuM ja. pahelAM to choDavAnI e vastu yAda AvyA ja kare. e cAritramohanIya AkhuM samajavAmAM ja bhUla thaI che. eka kRpALudeva ekalA ja samajyA che. bIje badhe samajavAmAM ja bhUla che. have eka samajavAmAM bhUla thAya to zuM thAya AgaLa ? meLa paDe nahIM kazAyano ! tethI kRpALudeve lakhyuM,

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cAritramoha 309 310 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) che te Aja pAchalA hisAba badhA cUkavavAnAM kAgaLiyA laIne Ave che ke pemenTa karavAnuM tame lakhI ApyuM chene ! te A phAIlo che, teno ukela lAvo, nikAla karo. na bolAya cAritramoha kSAyaka samakita vitA ! darzanamoha jAya to cAritramoha samajAvI zake. darzanamohanI hAjarImAM zI rIte cAritramoha samajAvI zake ? tyAM AgaLa tame jAvane sAdhu-mahArAja pAse, te kahe ke cAritramohanIyanuM bahu jora che. paNa cAritramoha bolAya nahIM koIthI. cAritramoha to kSAyaka samakti thAya pachIno je moha vadhyo, saraplasa (vadhArAno) rahyo te cAritramoha. praznakartA : te pahelAno nahIM ? dAdAzrI : te pahelAM moha kahevAya. mohathIya AgaLa mahAmohanIya. ghaNAkharA mahAmohanIya hoya, pachI mohanIya hoya. A badhAM derAsara bAMdhavA, samAjasevA karavI e badhA moha che. praznakartA : te UMcI jAtano moha kahevAyane paNa ? dAdAzrI : UMcI jAtano nahIM, zubha moha kahevAya. e moha ja kahevAya. moha eTale mUcha. AmAMthI mUcha UThIne AmAM beThI. gharamAM, strImAM hatI te tyAMthI UThI ane AmAM beThI. mUrchAthI bahAra gayo nathI. praznakartA : je nirjarA thAya te cAritramoha ? dAdAzrI : nA, nirjarA to badhAya mohanI thavAnI. nirjarA to, karma mAtranI nirjarA thavAnI, paNa darzanamoha jAya tyAra pachI cAritramoha rahe. eno Ama dAkhalo levo hoya to kevI rIte samajAvAya ? tyAre kahe, ahIMthI tame muMbaIthI amadAvAda javA nIkaLyA hoya, ane tame che te koTAnA sTezane bhegA thAva, ne koI mANasa kahe ke tamAre kyAM javuM che ? tyAre kahe, amadAvAda. tyAre kahe, kyAMthI Avo cho ? tyAre kahe, muMbaIthI AvyA. tyAre kahe, amadAvAdano rasto Ama hoya. eTale tame pUcho ke bhaI, kayo rasto ? tyAre kahe, ahIMthI pAchA jaI ane vaDodarA sTezane UtarI paDajo, ane vaDodarAthI TreIna badalaja amadAvAdanI, badhAMne pUchIne to pachI tame amadAvAda pahoMcI jazo. eTale tame tyAMthI je pAchA pharyA, te ghaDIe che te mithyAtvamoha UDyo ane samyaktva thayuM, eTale sAcI samajaNa paDI. tame jyAMthI pAchAM vaLyA te cAritramoha. jeTaluM UMdhuM cAlyA teTaluM pAchAM vaLyA te cAritramoha. jeTaluM UMdhuM cAlyA teTaluM pAchuM vaLavuM ja paDene ? tIrthaka janmyA tyArathI ja cAritramoha ! tamane to A jJAna maLyA pachI cAritramohanIya utpanna thAya. paNa bhagavAnane to janmathI ja cAritramohanIya hatI. e paiNyA toye cAritramoha, bebI thaI toye cAritramoha. pachI A vosarAvI dIdhuM, kapaDAMbapaDAM toye cAritramoha. badhuM cAritramoha TheTha sudhI hato. praznakartA : dAdA, to pachI cAritramoha to TheTha tIrthaMkara hoya tyAM sudhI cAritramoha to rahevAno ja ne ? dAdAzrI : TheTha sudhI cAritramoha ja che. cAritramoha baMdha thAya tyAre kevaLajJAna thAya. DiscArja mohane tIrthakaroe cAritramoha kahyo. darzanamohanIya eTale cArja pariNAma. cArja pariNAma baMdha thaI gayuM eTale karma cArja thatAM baMdha thaI gayA. tyAre kaheze ke gayA avatAramAM cArja thaIne atyAra sudhI hatA, tenuM zuM thAya? e cAritramohanIya. cAritramohanIya eTale DiscArja pariNAma. samakti pachInAM karmo .. karma to thayA ja karavAnAM. nathI icchA, hoya toye thayA karavAnAM. praznakartA : ADA AvIne gaLAmAM bharAya. dAdAzrI : hA, gaLAmAM bharAya. karmano niyama ja evo che. praznakartA : paNa have e badhuM dAdA, cAritramoha ja ne ?

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cAritramoha 311 dAdAzrI : A badhuM cAritramoha kharuM, paNa jJAna maLyA pachI cAritramoha. jJAna nA maLyuM hoya ne, tene to moha ja kahevAya. jJAna maLe tene darzanamoha nAza thAya, tyAre cAritramoha rahe. darzanamohathI karma cArja thAya ne cAritramohathI cArja nA thAya. cAritramoha nikAlI. phaLa ApIne jAya, kaDavuM-mIThuM beu. praznakartA : te jevuM cArja thayeluM hoya evuM ja phaLa Ape ? dAdAzrI : hA, kaDavuM hoya to kaDavuM phaLa Ape ne mIThuM hoya to mIThuM phaLa Ape. ahoho ! tIrthaMkarotA phoDa ! A bIjA lokone vicAramAM goThavatAM ya nA AvaDe. bhagavAna to DAhyA hazene ? sAva gAMDA to nahIM hoyane ? praznakartA : nA, jarAya nahIM. dAdAzrI : juone, kevuM cAritramoha nAma pADyuM che ! A moha kayA prakArano ne A moha kyA prakArano ? tyAre kahe, A cAritramoha che. A cAritramoha zabda zA hAru ke loka kaheze, bhaI have, zenA sAru Ama kare che ? A kayA prakArano moha ?" tyAre kahe, 'bhaI, e prakAra judo che. mahAvIra bhagavAne kahelo e prakAra judo che. je mohamAMthI bIja nathI paDatuM e nirbIja moha che.' jagatanAM loka kahe ke A kaI jAtano moha ! e lokone khabara nA paDe, ApaNe jANIe ke A cAritramoha che. je moha nirbIja che, eTale zekAI gayeluM bIja che. UgavAne pAtra nathI evo moha che e. lokone cAritramoha na samajAya eTalA mATe meM DiscArja moha kahyo. A loko che ne, cAritramoha samajatA nathI. cAritramoha bole badhAMya. paNa thoDuMka samaje, amuka bhAga cAritramohano, bIjo badho nA samaje. loko zuM kahe che ke Aya paNa moha ja chene ! A che te atyAre kapaDAM pahere che, pharsTa klAsa TAI bAMdhI che, ghaDiyALa pahere che, te A moha nathI ? tyAre jJAnI puruSa zuM kahe che ? moha to kharo paNa e cAritramoha che. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) kAraNa ke darzanamoha gayo che, mATe cAritramoha chUTo pADyo. nahIM to moha ja kahevAta, ekalo moha ja ! 312 cAritramoha thoDuM ghaNuM samajyA che, ene ame DiscArja moha kahyo. DiscArja zabda Avyo ke tarata ene samajAI jAya ke A javAnuM AvyuM che A. kevo sarasa phoDa pADyo che. A moha kaI jAtano ? tyAre kahe, cAritramoha. jagata AkhuM darzanamohanIyathI laTakyuM che. cAritramohane kaMI levAdevA nathI. cAritramohanIyane upAdhi hoya toye mahIM samAdhi rahe ane cAritra game teTaluM pALyuM hoya toye paNa darzanamohanIya hoya to samAdhi nA rahe. cAritra game teTaluM pALyuM hoya, bAhya cAritra, paNa jyAM sudhI darzanamohanIya jAya nahIM tyAM sudhI samAdhi to zuM, paNa zAMtiye nA rahe ane cAritramoha game evo hoya toye darzanamohanIya gayuM hoya to samAdhi rahe. pachI bhagavAne kahyuM ke cAritramohano laTakelo haze te cAlaze, paNa darzanamohano laTakelo nahIM cAle. darzanamohavALo to dizAmUDha thayelo che. cAritramohavALo ene e rastA para jarA AghopAcho thayA kare che eTaluM ja, paNa pelo to dizAmUDha ja. kaI dizAmAM jaze, tenuM ThekANuM ja nahIM ! darzanamohanI ja bhAMjagaDa che. darzanamohathI jagata koI dahADoya nivRtta thayuM ja nathI. have darzana mohanIya gayuM. have vAMdho zuM che ? huM to AtmA thaI gayo. tyAre kahe, "nA, hajI to cAritramohanIya rahyuM chene ? gayA avatAranAM pariNAma rahyAM chene ?" praznakartA : cAritramohamAM kapAya ekalo ja Avene ? dAdAzrI : nA, evuM nahIM. pahelAMnA jJAnanuM je pariNAma pAmeluM che e cAritramohamAM hoya. bIjuM kazuM hoya nahIMne ! akrama mArgamAM cAritramoha ! moha be prakAranAM che : darzanamoha ane cAritramoha. darzanamoha eTale dekhatAM ja ene moha utpanna thAya. khAlI dekhavAthI ja, sAMbhaLavAthIya moha utpanna thAya e. ane bIjo cAritramoha eTale zuM ?

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cAritramoha ApaNane dekhatAM moha nA thAya, paNa e ApaNI anIcchApUrvakanuM che, icchA nA hoya toya moha thayA karavAno. ApaNI icchA nA hoya chatAMye moha thAya. e badhuM cAritramohanIya kahevAya. icchA nA hoya chatAM krodha thAya, icchA nA hoya chatAM lobha thAya, icchA nA hoya chatAM kapaTa thaI jAya, icchA nA hoya chatAM ahaMkAra thaI jAya. evuM tamane thAya che, tamArI icchA vagara ? nA gamatuM hoya toye e Ave, enuM nAma cAritramohanIya. ApaNe jene DiscArja kahIe chIe, te badho cAritramoha che. 313 praznakartA : eTale jJAna lIdhA pachI je moha thAya che te cAritramoha ja kahevAyane ? dAdAzrI : hA, e badho cAritramoha ja kahevAya. eTale Ugato moha UDI gayo, Athamato moha rahyo. cAritramoha eTale A bhAIne khoTuM bolavAnI Teva hoya, have jJAna lIdhA pachI zuM thAya ke enAthI khoTuM bolAI jAya. pachI ene khabara paDe ke A bhUla thaI, AnuM nAma cAritramoha. e khoTuM bolyo e kyA mohathI ? tyAre kahe, cAritramohathI. A tamane je jJAna ApyuM chene, have tame zuddhAtmA thayA, A bIjuM zuM rahyuM ? tyAre kahe, cAritramoha. te nikAla karI nAkho samabhAve eTale saMyamapUrvaka. basa, bIjuM kazuM nahIM. cAritramohanIya rahyuM, teneya tame juo cho eTale tamane samyak cAritra che. A cAritramohanIya to kone ? ahIMyA ApaNuM akrama mArgamAM cAritramohanIya kharuM, paNa tyAM AgaLa kramika mArgamAM cAritramohanIyamAM kartApaNuM rahyuM hoya che. kramika mArgamAM TheTha sudhI kartA, AgalA bhava sudhI kartA. tyAM ahaMkArane zuddha karavAno. ahaMkAra zuddha karatAM karatAM javAnuM. eTale jeTalI cAritramohanIya eTalo ahaMkAra paNa hoya. eTale emane cAritramohanIya khaseDavI paDe. tamAre cAritramohanIya khaseDavAnI nahIM. tame to cAritramohanIya juo eTale tame samyak cAritramAM AvyA. emane DiscArjeya karavo paDe. bhayaMkara AphatanuM sthAna che e badhuM. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) A kahyuMne, karoDo avatAreya na bane, evuM ahIM eka kalAkamAM bane che. mATe kAma kADhI lejo. pharI pharI A tAla besavAno nathI. eka miniTa paNa pharI pharI dAdAno tAla bese nahIM. bIjuM badhuM besaze. 314 have kramika mArgamAM e lokoya kahe, amAro cAritramoha. meM samajaNa pADI, ke nA bolAya. tyAre pelA kaheze, ame tyAgI loko. paNa tyAgI toya moha pAko, tamane tyAga karavAno moha che ane A saMsArIone grahaNa karavAno moha che. paNa e baMne moha ja chene ! have AtmA tyAgato ya nathI ne grahaNa karato ya nathI. eTale A badho moha, have A bahAra cAritramohanI vAto cAle paNa cAritramoha zuM, e joyelo nA hoya koIe ! praznakartA H anubhava nahIM eno. dAdAzrI : joyelo nA hoya to anubhava kyAMthI lAve ? have loko badhA kharA mohane cAritramoha kahe che. cAritramoha dekhADyone tamane ? atyAra sudhI joyo nahoto. jyAM sudhI kartApaNuM baMdha na thAya tyAM sudhI cAritramoha dekhAya nahIM koIne. pelA loko vyavahAramAM bole che. laukikabhASAmAM ke have cAritramoha amAro che. Ama che, tema che, e badhuM bhautika che. karma karato baMdha thAya tyAre cAritramoha rahyo. e have cArja baMdha thayuM ke DiscArja ekaluM rahyuM. e cAritramoha mATe to koIe mane javAba nA Apyo sAco, paNa zodhakhoLa karatAM mane bahu TAIma lAgyo ke cAritramoha bhagavAna zuM kahevA mAMge che ? e kayA prakArano moha che ? pachI mane anubhavathI khabara paDI ke A to vartanamoha ! nAlAyaka vartana e nAlAyakamoha che ane lAyaka vartana e lAyakamoha che. e badho, e moha che eka prakArano. tyAre kaheze, paNa A moha, moha nA gaNAya. tyAre kahe, 'nA. A pragamelo che.' jyAM sudhI dUdha ane dahIM be judAM che, tyAM sudhI e bene kazuM levAdevA nathI. dUdhamAM dahIM nAkhyA pachI tarata dahIM maLe nahIM. paNa savAranA pahoramAM pragameluM hoya eTale dahIM ja thayeluM hoya. te A

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316 cAritramoha 315 pragamelo moha che. e zodhakhoLa karyA pachI A jaDene ? nahIM to A badhI kaMI sahelI vAta che te ? mahAtmAoto cAritramoha ! vastu eka ja che, vastu be nathI. jagatanA lokone mohanIya che ne ApaNane cAritramohanIya che, phera eTalo ja. cAritramoha eTale meM je tamane jJAna ApyuMne, e tamane draSTi ApI ke A UMdhI draSTi che badhI. AvatA bhava upara bhava baMdhAyA karaze, ne ApaNuM kalyANa nahIM thAya. have draSTi che te Atmasanmukha thaI. have e UMdhI draSTi kADhI ApI. UMdhI draSTi nIkaLI gaI, e darzanamoha nIkaLI gayo. mohanA be bhAga, mohanA be chokarA, eka UMdhI draSTi ane eka vartana. te have tamAruM vartana ekaluM rahyuM. UMdhI draSTi jatI rahI. navuM vartana UbhuM thaze nahIM. e jUnuM vartana che e cAritramoha che. vyavasthita je nikAla karaze e badhoya cAritra moha che, kharuM-khoTuM badhuMya ! chatAmAM chatuM kAma thaI jAya ke UMdhAmAM UMdhuM kAma thaI jAya, toya tame zuddhAtmA cho e bhAna tUTavuM nA joIe. kAraNa ke mane to dAdAe zuddhAtmA pada ApyuM che. te A badhuM have je vyavasthita che, e badho cAritramoha nikAla karavAno che. e moha jato rahe eTale mokSa thaI jAya. A cAritramoha kone kahuM chuM ke tame have jJAna lIdhuM ane tame sAruM kapaDuM paheratA hoya ke mAthe vALa oLatA hoya tela nAkhIne to loka kahe nahIM ke, caMdubhAI, dAdA pAse jJAna laIne AvyA cho ne vALa zenA oLo cho ? to A vALa oLavA, e to moha to kharo ja ne ? ene 'nA' to kahevAya ja nahIMne ApaNe ? ne e kahe che e khoTuM nathIne ? A moha to kharone ? paNa A cAritramoha. cAritramoha eTale iphekTiva moha ! moha nahIM. kaoNjha baMdha karyo. iphekTa to rahe ja ne pachI ? A iphekTiva moha eTale eno ukela AvI jAya. pachI navuM kaoNjha baMdhAya. nahIM. eTale chuTakAro thaI gayo. cAritramoha e ApaNo Ajano moha nathI. pahelAM kareluM, tenuM A phaLa AvyuM che. te A mahAtmAone badhAne cAritramoha, have gAmanA koI mANasa zuM tapAsa kare ? 'moTA zuddhAtmA thayA che ane pAchA paisA gaNavAmAM bahu zurA che.' tyAre mUA, zurA nA AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) hoya to nAkhI de paisA ! vyavahAramAM gAMDo dekhAya, nahIM ? vyavahAramAM DAhyA rahevuM joIe. A atyAre A mArAM kapaDAM che, huM jato houM ne koI kADhI le, to vAMdho nathI ane che toya vAMdho nathI, paNa che cAritramoha. A mAro moha nathI. A iphekTiva moha rahyo, te lokone evuM lAge ke A badhAnAmAM kazuM pheraphAra thayo nathI ane huM jANuM ke tamane vaDhavA jevA nathI. huM koI dahADo tamane koIne vaDhuM ahIM ? huM jANuM ke vaDhavA jevuM che nahIM. cAvI mArI pAse che. tame badhuM je kArya karone, enI cAvI mArI pAse che, mArI AjJA pALe tyAM sudhI. AjJA nA pALe to mArI pAse cAvI nathI. je AjJA pALe che, ene be-traNa avatAra pachI ke eka avatAra pachI mokSa che. enI gerenTI sAthe kahIe chIe. ane ahIM ja mokSa thaI gayelo, amArI je AjJA pALe che, ene ciMtA kazuM thAya nahIM, krodha-mAnamAyA-lobha thAya nahIM. je krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha thAya che A lokone, tamane badhAMne thAya che e "iphekTa' che, 'kaoNjha' nathI. eTale ApaNe zuM kahIe chIe ke krodhamAna-mAyA-lobheya nathI. kAraNa ke 'kaoNjha' hoya to krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobha gaNAya. moha graMthi UDI gaI, eTale ApaNe kahyuM, kSAyaka samakita. have cAritramoha rahyo. je jAmI gayA che karma, phaLa ApavA mATe taiyAra thayA che. tethI to ApaNane khAvA-pIvAnuM maLene, nahIM to e nA hoya, to pachI kAla UThIne cAritramoha laI lo, khaIe-pIe zuM ? A badho cAritramoha ! khaIe chIe, pIe chIe, dAtaNa karIe chIe, badhuM Akho dahADo cAritramoha ja vaparAyA kare. cAritramoha kahevAya ! vartanamoha eTale cAritramoha. eTale zuM? e mohavALA je paramANu hatA, ene ApaNe zuddha karIne mokalI daIe chIe ! eTale pachI kSINamoha thAya. jeTalo cAritramoha khasyo eTaluM kSINamoha tarapha AgaLa gayo. kSINamoha tarapha caDI jAya che. 'gADI kyAM jAya che ?' 'kSINamohanA

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cAritramoha 317 318 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) sTezana upara.' 'nIkaLI kyAMthI ?" tyAre kahe jItamoha jina nAmanuM sTezana, tyAMthI nIkaLI A gADI. te mohane jItavA mAMDyo che have. te kSINamoha sTezana sudhI pahoMcADaze. tyAre bhagavAna thaI gayelA haze ! moha ja kSaya thaI gayo ! bAramuM guThANuM kAyamane mATe !! mahAvIra bhagavAnane kSINamoha jina dazA !! zuddhAtmA thayA eTale pachI lakSa hoya ene ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM ja'. tyAre kahe che ke "huM caMdulAla nahIM ?" tyAre kahe, 'caMdulAla kharA, paNa vyavahArathI'. vyavahAra calAvavA purato, eTale che te paccIsa prakAranA cArjamoha gayA. pachI cAritramoha rahyo. kSINamohamAM ya cAritramoha rahI gayo hoya. Ama kSINamoha kahevAto hoya. bAramA guMdANAne paNa mahIM cAritramoha hoya. kevaLajJAna sivAya cAritramoha pUro nA thAya. vAvelA bItuM AvyuM A phaLa ! cAritramoha eTale samajAyuMne ? dAna Apato hoya, tene kahIe ke 'tame akkala vagaranuM UMdhuM kAma karo cho ?" te kaheze, "A rahyuM tyAre !! tyAM AgaLa e bole ke 'huM kharuM karuM ' e cAritramoha, eka jaNa chokarAMne vaDhato hoya ne kahIe, 'zuM karavA vaDho cho vagara kAmanA ?" tyAre kahe, "nA, vaDhavA jevo che.' e cAritramoha ! praznakartA : khorAka ApI de che, puSTi ApI de che e ? dAdAzrI : e khorAka hoya, e eka jAtano moha che. 'ATha kalAka UMgha to joIe ja' e cAritramoha. joIe evuM kazuM manamAM nA hovuM joIe, kazuM Disijhana ja nA hovuM joIe. je vakhate koI UThADe te barAbara. A samabhAve nikAla karajo, paNa jeTalo lAbha thAya eTalo sAco. A to badhuM AkhuM to nA ja kADhI zakene ! ApaNe jANIe chIe ke haju be-traNa avatAra rahyA che, eTale jo samajene to A badhuM cAritramoha che. A badhI kriyAo thaI rahI che. A 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' gayuM eTale darzanamoha gayo. eTale cArja moha baMdha thaI gayo. have DiscArja moha rahyo. DiscArja moha jeTalo moha vagara jAya eTaluM aMdara samAdhi ja rahyA kare ! praznakartA : A jUno mAla phUTe che e eksepTa thato nathI. dAdAzrI : zuM thAya te ? bharyo eTale ! DuMgaLI atyAre nathI gamatI paNa to bhAvatI hatI tethI bharI lAvyAne ! tethI atyAre nA gamatI thaI. tethI bhagavAne ene cAritramoha ja kahyo che. eTale bhogavye ja chUTakone ! e bharelo mAla nIkaLyA sivAya rahe nahIM. chatAM mahIM kacakaca thayA kare ke A nahIM. A khoTuM thAya che. deha to phaLa Apene ! praznakartA : ghaNI vastu evI hoya ke ApaNane na game. ApaNe bolIe, bolI javAya pachI ema thAya ke A na bolAyuM hota to sAruM hatuM, paNa bolI javAya ! dAdAzrI : hA. eya cAritramoha. eTale vaDhatAM nathIne ApaNe, cAritramoha eTale ene vaDhatAM nathI. A moha eno kharekharano moha nathI A. triyonI kyiA have cAstrimoha ! praznakartA: cAritramoha che to mana-vacana-kAyAno traNeno judA judA Divijhanano hoya, manano cAritramoha, vANIno cAritramoha, dehano cAritramoha ? dAdAzrI : jeTalA bhAga paDe eTalA badhA bhAgano cAritramoha hoya. jenuM jenuM vartana hoya e badhuMya cAritramohane kAraNe ja che. moha hoya tyAM caMcaLatA utpanna thAya, nahIM to caMcaLatA utpanna nA thAya. eTale pharavA gayA, jamavA gayA teya cAritramoha. praznakartA: koI paNa A mana-vacana-kAyAnA yoganI kriyA. dAdAzrI : badhI ja cAritramoha. hA, paNa AtmajJAna thayA pachI ! praznakartA : 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e thayA pachI. dAdAzrI : hA. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ne A badhuM mAruM hoya. phakta A cAritramoha rahyo. ane cAritramoheya kaMI tamane zuddhAtmAne rahyo nathI. saMpUrNa

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cAritramoha nAza thaI gayo che. paNa A caMdubhAIne cAritramoha rahyo che. tamAre samajavAnuM. vyavahAramAM cAritramoha rahyo che A. ko'kanI joDe caMdubhAI jarA AkarA thaI gayA eya cAritramoha. karakasara zA mATe kare che ? lobhane mATe. to eya cAritramoha che. doSo thAya che teya cAritramoha ane lobha thAya teya cAritramoha. badho lobha ja gaNAya che. doSo ane karakasara beu lobha ja gaNAya che. Ane doSapaNAno lobha che ane Ane karakasarano lobha che. 319 e bahene kazuM sAruM paheryuM, mATe kaMI enI TIkA karavA jevuM nathI. e to cAritramoha ja che. atyAre have emane mahIM potAne nA gamatuM hoya toya paheravuM paDe, chUTako ja nahIM, cAritramoha che eTale. hisAba pelo hoya, te pUro karavo paDene ! paheravAno vAMdho nathI. A to cAritramoha chene ! paNa te aMdaranuM sudhare to kazuM sAdu paheravA jevuMya hoya to cAle. DiscArja mohato kara samabhAve nikAla ! AtmA ne dehane be judAM pADe evuM vijJAna meM ApyuM, eTale tArI draSTi je vAMkI hatI te sIdhI thaI gaI. ane vAMkI draSTi hatI tyAM sudhI tane moha hato ane tyAM sudhI karma baMdhAtA'tA. tyAre kahe che, haju sAheba moha to mane rahyo che. haju to kapaDAM sArAM paherIe chIe, ghaDIyALa joIe che, cazmA joIe che, Ama joIe che, tela joIe che, attara joIe. tyAre kahe, e cAritramoha che, DiscArja moha ! cAritra moha, ene have manamAM ema nA thAya ke pharI pharI AvuM prApta ho. je AvyuM e nikAla karI nAkha. khAruM AvyuM to ochuM khA. sAruM AvyuM to khA nirAMte paNa nikAla karI nAkha. samabhAve nikAla kare chene ? basa tyAre, enA jevuM pachI rahyuM ja zuM te ? praznakartA : cAritra mohanIyano atyAre A kapaDAmAM kSaya thaI rahyo che ke vRddhi thaI rahI che ? dAdAzrI : A to kharI paDatuM ja jAya, kSaya thAya. cAritramoha eTale nikAlImoha. ene enI meLe kharI paDavA ja devAnuM. zarIrane Avazyaka hoya, tene cAritramoha nA kahevAya. Avazyaka eTale pANI-khorAka vagere. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ene moha nA kahevAya. paNa A cA che ke je savAranA pahoramAM yAda Ave ke cA nathI AvI, je baMdhanarUpa lAge ene cAritramoha bhAre kahevAya. 320 enI evuM A cArja thato moha baMdha thaI gayo. have DiscArja moha rahyo. mudata pUrI thAya tyAre e pUro thAya ane jeNe A jJAna nA lIdhuM hoya, tene be moha hoya. cArja ane DiscArja. paccIsa prakAranA cArja moha, paccIsa prakAranA DiscArja moha. ApaNA sAdhu-AcAryoneya, emaNe chokarAM-bairI tyAgyA paNa toye cArja moha paccIseya prakAranA ane DiscArja moheya paccIsa prakAranA hoya. ApaNuM A vijJAna eka ATaluM ja che ! ATalo badho moha, keTalA badhA mohamAM tame raho cho ?! tamArI thALImAM badho moha juene, tamArAM kapaDAMno moha jue, tamArA phaleTono moha jue to tamane pahelAMnA koI Avene, te AvIne kaheze, 'are ! mokSanI vAta zuM karavA karo cho ?' ane evAmAM che te A vItarAga vijJAna, akrama vijJAne tamane tAryA eya ajAyabI ja chene ! AkhA zarIrane phAIla kahe che. A deha emanA jJAnamAM phAIla tarIke rahe che. tyAre dhanya chene ! e jJAnane ya dhanya che ke je dehane phAIla kahevAmAM Ave che ! ATalA badhA mohamAM rahevA chatAMya paNa dehane phAIla kahe che ! bolo, moha tyAM Ubho rahe ke ?! kevuM vijJAna che !! tethI meM kahyuMne ke nikAla karI nAkhajo ATalo. jevuM hoya te khAjo-pIjo, ApaNe nA nathI kahetA. kerIo-berIo khAjo, rasa kADhIne khAjo. paNa AmAM sukha che evuM nA mAnazo. A mArI vastu hoya A ! parANe khAvuM paDe che. potAno khorAka ja nA hoyane ! tuM copaDI lakhuM chuM eya cAritramoha che. kAraNa koI le to moha Ubho thAya, tane nA game e moha. mahIM A loko satsaMga sAMbhaLe che teya cAritramoha. AmAM moha chene koI paNa prakArano, ahIM Ave che teya cAritramoha che. A kriyAno vAMdho nathI. kriyAmAM moha che, teno vAMdho che. kriyAno vAMdho nA hoya. tame cAvI cAvIne khAva teno vAMdho nathI ne nA cAvyA vagara khAva to teno vAMdho nathI. kaDavI davA jhaTapaTa UtArI jAva teno vAMdho nathI ane moMDhe dhIme dhIme pIvo toya vAMdho nathI. paNa enA

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cAritramoha 32 1 322 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) para moha che. e kaheze, 'bhalabhalI kaDavI hoya toya huM dhIme dhIme gaTagaTAvIne pIvuM', to eneya cAritramoha kahevAya ane koI kaheze, 'mArAthI A kaDavuM nA pIvAya' eya cAritramoha. eka prakArano moha che e cAritramoha. cAritramoha thAya zuddha tapathI ! praznakartA : prazno pUchavA e paNa cAritramohane ? dAdAzrI tyAre bIjo kayo moha ? nirmohI to pUche nahIM. nirmohI zene mATe pUche ? cAritramoha hoya e pUche. paNa cAritramoha nA pUche to e nikAla nA thAya. mATe pUchI levuM. pUche eTale ukela AvI gayo eno. mahIM bharelo mAla hato nIkaLI gayo. eTale ame badhAMne roja e kahIe ke pUcho, kaMIka pUcho. pUcha pUcha karIne e kADhI nAkho. praznakartA : jAtrA karI AvyA e badho cAritramohane ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjuM zuM ? jJAna letAM pahelAM jAtrA karI hatI e tamAro moha hato. huM caMdubhAI chuM ne A jAtrA karuM chuM. have tame zuddhAtmA thayA ne jAtrA karo cho eTale cAritramoha. have jAtrAo karavAnI zene mATe rahI ? tyAre kaheze, A je mAla bharelo che e to ukela lAvavo. paDaze. je jaththAbaMdha mAla bharyo che ene vecI to devo paDazene ! praznakartA : vAMcavAno zokha hoya to e cAritramoha hoya eTale pUro karavo paDe. bAkI, A jJAna pachI kaMI vAMcavAnI jarUra nathI have. dAdAzrI : hA. te badhuM vAMcavAno cAritramoha hoya. koIne na vAMcavAno hoya, koIne pepara vAMcavAno hoya. koIne be bahAravaTiyAnI vAto, sI.AI.DI.nI vAto vAMcavAno hoya, e badhI ja kriyA je bAkI rahe che e badhoya cAritramoha che. e sArI-khoTI e to samAje nAma ApelAM che, buddhithI thAya che. bhagavAnane tyAM AvuM sAruM-khoTuM kazuM che nahIM. badhuM eka ja vastu, cAritramoha. dAna ApuM toya che te cAritramoha che ane dAna lauM toya cAritramoha che. cA moLI AvI ane ene nabhAvI lIdhuM teya cAritramoha ane ciDAyo teya cAritramoha. kAraNa ke emAM AtmA nathIne ! AtmA judo rahyo che badhAMthI. praznakartA : je nibhAvI lIdhuM, ene Ape tapamAM gaNAvyuM. dAdAzrI : hA, tapa karyuM. jJAna-darzana-cAritra ne tapa. peluM ciDAyo e tapamAM nA kahevAya. praznakartA : e vakhate eNe cAritramohane jJAna karIne zuddha karyo ema thAyane dAdAjI ? dAdAzrI : hA. zuddha karyuM ane pelAne zuddha karavuM paDe. pelAe zuddha karyuM te beu kAma thayA ane Ane A thayA pachI pAchuM zuddha karavuM paDe. ane nA thayuM to pachI hisAba pharI joDe Avyo. je vAtomAM AtmA nathI, AtmAnA anusaMdhAnamAM nA hoya evI e vAtone cAritramoha kahevAya che. e kahenArane ya cAritramoha ane sAMbhaLanArane ya cAritramoha ! cAritramoha tamane samajAyuMne ? kuvicArosuvicAro e badhuM ja cAritramoha che. cAritramoha roja kaheto'tone ? ekaluM cAritramoha eTaluM yAda rahene toya bahu thaI gayuM. loka to kahe ke kayA prakArano moha che te A kapaDAM paherIne pharo cho, istrI TAITa kema pahero cho ? e to loko to nA kahe ? jevuM dekhe evuM kahe ane tamAre jANavuM paDe ke A ya moha to kharo ja ne, paNa kayA prakArano e jANavuM joIe. cAritramoha eTale ApaNA vartanamAM moha dekhAya lokone ! ATalI utAvaLathI kema doDe che, kaheze. moha chene paNa ? tyAre kahe, pelA mANasa pAse tuM paisA mAge che, to pelo mANasa paisA nathI Apato, ne jato rahe che tyAre tArA vartanamAM kema phera paDyo? tyAre kahe, cAritra moha che. khapAvo jAgRtipUrvaka cAritramoha ! jJAna ApyA pachI je moha gaNAyane, loko zuM kahe, "ohoho, caMdubhAI keTalo badho mohavALo che, sinemAmAM AnaMda, pataMgamAM AnaMda,

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cAritramoha 323 324 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) phalANo e moha che." ame ene moha nA kahIe, ame jANIe ke A cAritramoha eno nikAla thaI jaze. enI upara jAgRti rAkhavI joIe. cAritramoha aTake nahIM paNa jAgRti rAkhavI joIene ! aTake keTaluM ? ApaNe aTakAvavA dhArIe eTaluM aTake. tema chatAM nA aTake, e bhale e thAya, paNa enI para jAgRti hovI joIe. praznakartA Ape kahyuMne jAgRti rAkhavAnI, e zuM ? dAdAzrI : pataMga uDADIe toya manamAM rahyA kare ke A khoTuM karI rahyo chuM, AvuM nA thavuM joIe. praznakartA : rAjIkhuzIthI nA karavuM joIe evuM ? dAdAzrI : e caMdubhAI rAjIkhuzIthI kare, toya paNa ApaNane A nA thavuM joIe evuM mahIM aMdara jAgRti rahevI joIe. praznakartA : A je kare che ane huM jANuM chuM e jAgRti kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, jAgRti kahevAya. jAgRti to caMdubhAIe zuM zuM karyuM hoya tene ApaNe pharI lakhavuM hoya to Akho itihAsa lakhI ApIe. che tharmomiTara mahIM ja ! mahIM AtmA tharmomiTara jevo che. te tAva caDhyo che ke utaryo che, badhuM khabara paDe. kaI bAju dAnata che e khabara nA paDe ? praznakartA : khabara paDe. aMdara badhI gAMTho phUTe e khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : gAMTho phUTe te nahIM. gAMTho bhale phUTe, gAMTho phUTe e DiscArja che paNa aMdara icchA kevI hoya che ? A AvuM joIe che. e bhIkha hoya che haju. vastu eno vAMdho nathI, bhIkhano vAMdho che. bhIkha rahe che mahIM ? bhIkha to tarata khabara paDI jAya. praznakartA : cAritramoha ane bhIkha, e bemAM jarA bheda khyAla nathI Avato. dAdAzrI : cAritramoha nikAlI che, DiscArja che ane bhIkha e vastu badhuM UbhuM kare che mahIM. bhIkha mATe haMmezAM upayoga rahe. bhIkhamAM Akho upayoga ja pesI jAya ane cAritramohamAM upayoga jAgRti rahe. praznakartA : Ape kaheluM ke amuka prakArano cAritramoha evo hoya che ke je jJAnane paNa UDADI mUke, te kevA prakArano ? dAdAzrI : hA. e to cAritramoha evo hoya to to Akho bhaDako karI devaDAve. badhuM jJAna hau UDADI mUke, dhakko mArIne ! te AmAM viSayanA prakArano ja hoya, bIjo koI nahIM. A jeTalA badhA kaSAya UbhA thAya chene, e badhA viSayamAMthI UbhA thayelA che. akrama vijJAnanI geranTI !! praznakartA : AtmA prApta thAya eTale pudgalamAM RjutA-mRdutA guNo UbhAM thAya. have jJAna lIdhuM che, chatAM emano vartAva evo hoya che ke ApaNane ema lAge ke ATalI kaThoratA kema haze ? koI emane pUche to kahe, A bharelo mAla nIkaLe che. A cAritramoha nIkaLe che. eTale Ama thAya che. to e vakhate A mRdutA-RjutAnI vAta kyAM UDI jAya che ? dAdAzrI : mRdutA-RjutA hoya ja emAM. praznakartA: hA, e kevI rIte e samajAtuM nathI, e samajAvo jarA. dAdAzrI : AcAra kaThora hoya paNa mRdutA-RjutA aMdara hoya, enI ame gerenTI ApIe chIe. evuM A akrama vijJAna che. eksakyujha le te ya cAritramoha ! praznakartA : A to mAro cAritramoha, mAruM DiscArja che ema karIne pelo eksakyujha (mAphI) nA le ? khoTo bacAva potAno nA kare ? dAdAzrI : e le che teya cAritramoha che, paNa jo potAnI rItarasama badalI nAkhe, A khodI nAkhe ApeluM jJAna, to pachI mArgamAM nA kahevAya.

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cAritramoha 325 326 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ApaNuM jJAna ja khodI nAkhe ne pAMca AzAmAM nA raheto hoya, pacAsa TakAya AjJAmAM nA raheto hoya, to khalAsa thaI gayuM. A to pacAsa TakA rahe toya bahu thaI gayuM. pachI je avaLacaMDuM thaI jAya chene, teya cAritramoha che. praznakartA : to eneya cAritramoha kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : khuzIthI kahevAya ja. cAritramoha sArI rIte kahevAya. paNa ko'kane nA kahezo. A lokone nA karazo vAta. tamAre mane kahevuM. loko tamane DIskareja karI nAkhaze ane A je sthira thayA che teneya asthira karI nAkhaze. mane kaheze to huM kahI daIza ke bhaI, A zuM che te ! praznakartA : paNa e to satya ja vAta chene ! A cAritramohamAM ja Avene ? bIje zemAM jAya ? dAdAzrI : DiscArja ja che tyAM AgaLa. paNa vacce Dakhala ja nathIne tamArI ! tamArI Dakhala hoya to tame javAbadAra cho. A zuM thaI rahyuM che ? ITa hepansa thaI rahyuM che. A cAritramoha eTale ITa hepansa. tamArI Dakhala nathI koI jAtanI AmAM. 'Ama karo ke tema karo' evI Dakhala nathI. enI meLe ja badhA saMjogo bhegA thAya tyAre kArya thAya. tamArI Dakhala nathI. tamAruM AmAM cAle ja nahIMne ! tamAre to, AkhuM kartApada UDI gayuM che. pachI zI rIte tame javAbadAra ? eTale koIe mUMjhAvAnI jarUra nahIM. mane pUchavuM vakhate, bahu manamAM mUMjhavaNa thAya to. samabhAve nikAlathI mukti cAritramohatI ! ajAyaba mArga che A. eTale kAma kADhI levA jevuM che. ApaNe, jhaTapaTa AnI pAchaLa paDIne. bIjI icchAo atyAre UbhI thAyane, te moLI karI nAkhavI ene jema tema karIne ane te badho cAritramoha che. icchA e kaMI kharekhara moha nathI, cAritramoha che. bhagavAnane cAritramoha hato. gherathI bahAra nIkaLyAne, te kevaLajJAna thatAM sudhI je moha rahyo te badho cAritramoha. A tame che te veDhamI-jalebI khAtA hoya, to huM tamane vaDhavA nA AvuM. huM jANuM ke Amano cAritramoha che ane tame teno nikAla karo cho. pharI Ave nahIM evI rIte eno samabhAve nikAla karI nAkhavAno. atyAre je AvyuM e vyavasthita, nA AvyuM teya paNa vyavasthita. veDhamI kAcI AvI teya vyavasthita, sarasa AvI teya vyavasthita. badhuM vyavasthita chene ? te ApaNe tyAM samabhAve nikAla karI nAkhIe chIe e cAritramohano, enuM nAma mukita. bIjuM kazuM che nahIM. Avo sahelo mokSamArga koI dahADo sAMbhaLavAmAMya nA Avelo hoya, eTalo badho sahelo-saraLa mArga che A. tyAga karavAnuM nahIM, kazI bhAMjagaDa nahIM, Dakho nahIM, Dakhala nahIM. praznakartA : satsaMgamAM javuM e paNa moha che, paNa te cAritramoha che, tema Ape jaNAvyuM che to A moha paNa anya mohanI jema javo joIe? dAdAzrI : A moha kevI rIte jaI rahyo che e joyA karavAnuM che. caMdubhAI khAtA hoya, pItA hoya, kaca kaca karatA hoya to e badho moha che te joyA karavAno tamAre. eTale e moha jato rahe. Dakho karo ke "kema A khAruM karyuM che" to mohamAM jarA cIkAza karI pAchI. Dakho nahIM karavAno. 'joyA" ja karavAnuM. A moha to kharo paNa jovAthI ja jAya, jovAthI ja nAza pAme. cAritramoha eTale DiscArjamoha, DiscArjamoha eTale ApaNA hAthamAM sattA nathI. enI meLe ja cAlyo jaze, tame jo vItarAga rahezo to. praznakartA : paNa cAritramoha Akhare to javo ja joIene ? dAdAzrI : e jaI rahyo che. cAritramoha jaI rahyo che. A je phAIlo e cAritramohanI ja che. phAIlono nikAla thaI gayo eTale phula gavarmenTa thaI gayo. eTale javo joIe evuM nathI, kADhavAno nathI, jaI ja rahyo che. dAdAtuM cAritra, cAritramoha vitAnuM ! cAritramoha zuM che e batADavA to ame daza-daza dahADA tamArI joDe hoIe chIe. kaheze, 'dAdA, Tyuba nathI" to dAdA kaheze 'cAlaze".

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cAritramoha 327 328 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) 'dAdA, braza nathI." to dAdA kaheze, "cAlaze'. 'dAdA, UliyuM ekaluM che.' to dAdA kaheze, "cAlaze". praznakartA : cAritramoha zAnAthI jAya ? dAdAzrI : ene samajavAthI jAya. samaje to enI para upayoga de eTale jAya. praznakartA : kampliTa nirAgrahatA ? dAdAzrI : nahIM. cAritramoha judI vastu che. nirAgrahatA e barobara che. e zabda judo che ane Ane cAritramohathI samajIe to AmAM moha che. AgrahatA vastu judI che. AgrahatA ahaMkArano vibhAga che ane A moha che, je pratyakSa oLakhAya pAcho. pratyakSa oLakhAya enI para mUrchA che. 'dAdA, garama pANI vadhu che, TADhuM ochuM che' to dAdA kaheze 'cAlaze'. 'dAdA, garama ochuM che ne TATuM vadhAre che' to dAdA kaheze cAlaze'. 'dAdA TA pANI ekaluM che" to dAdA kaheze "cAlaze'. eTalA mATe ame daza dahADA badhA mahAtmAo joDe rahIe chIe ke jJAnI puruSanuM daza dahADAnuM cAritra juo. cAritramohanIya vagaranuM cAritra juo. eTalA sAru to rahIe chIe, paNa nA samaje tenuM zuM thAya ! roTalI amArI thALImAM mUke pachI eka jaNa kaheze, "eka ja roTalI che. dAdA, tame bhAta ekalo khAva' ne roTalI UThAvI jAya to ame kahIe kaMI vAMdho nahIM, 'cAlaze' ane bhAta UThAvI jAya kaheze, roTalI ekalI ja che to ame kahIe, 'sAruM, cAlaze." e 'cAlaze' bolAya kyAre ke enI para mUcha tUTelI hoya to bolAya. Agraha to eka cAle nahIM tyAM AgaLa mUcha tUTelI hoya bhAtanI te... kArelAnuM zAka mUkeluM hoya ne AvatAM ja pahelAM mana mahIM khuza thayuM hoya ne zAka pAchuM laI jAya to manamAM peluM akaLAmaNa thAya e cAritramoha kahevAya. kArelAnuM zAka mUkIne laI gayo to kahIe 'cAlaze ane pelAne to pharI Ave to "eya nathI joItuM mAre'. 'nahIM joIe" e cAritramoha. ne mohane lIdhe evI vANI nIkaLe che. moha nA hoya to kazo vAMdho nathI, jema kare tema ane jJAtA-draSTA bhAva ja rahe. tamAre cAritra moha rahyo che. e pharI saMsAra bIja nAkhe evo nathI paNa e che tyAM sudhI samAdhi sukho nahIM utpanna thAya. A huM koTa-TopI paheruM chuM, teno ya guno lAgu thato haze ? ko'ka kahe ke "e jJAnI puruSa che, saMpUrNa jJAnI che". ema kahe tyAre kahe, e kabUla karuM chuM, paNa A koTa-TopI pahere che? to A duniyAmAM koI cIja moha vagara banatI nathI, paNa A cAritramoha che. bIja nA paDe. paNa dekhavAmAM moha dekhAya. ApaNe kabUla karIe chIene, A amAro cAritramoha che, A ame Amane 'Avo' kahIe chIene teya cAritramoha, Avo ne ahIMyA Avone, besone. loko nA kahe ke, A tamArA jJAnI vIMTI pahere che, to zuM moha vagara koI vIMTI pahere ? tyAre mane pUche to mAre kahevuM paDe ke moha to kharone sAheba. emAM kaMI mArAthI nA na kahevAya. moha vagara koNa AvuM ghareNuM ghAle ? koI ghAle kharo ? paTiyAM koNa pADe moha vagara ? dADhI koNa kare ? muMcho koNa kADhI nakhAve ? moha vagara to kazuM thAya ja nahIM ? kaMI paNa moha che. paNa A cAritramoha che. badhAM kahe tyAM besavuM ApaNe ane badhAM nA kahe, paNe beso to tyAM besavuM. UThADavAmAMya ATha-ATha mANasa joIze ? saraLa thavuM. A ame gAdI para beThA, teya cAritramoha, cAritramohano artha tame samajyA ? Aje enI para moha nathI. koI paNa jAtano, laI le toye kazuM nahIM. A koTa laI lene to ye kazuM nahIM. paNa che kharo hakIkatamAM. pahere che kharA ane dhovA nAkhe che pAchA. sAheba, dhovA kema nAkhyuM ? tamane zuM vAMdho'to ? tyAre kahe, nA, lokomAM khoTuM dekhAya ne loko kahe che, juo to kharA, kapaDAM sIdhA nathI rAkhatA ! eTale lokone duHkhanuM kAraNa thAya. ApaNo cAritramoha lokone du:khanuM kAraNa thAya, evuM che A. eTale cAritramohano vAMdho ja nathI.

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cAritramoha 329 330 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) A badhI avasthA che, emAM amAre bIja paDe nahIM evuM che amuka, paNa cAritramoha che e vAta to so TakA, nA kahevAya nahIM koIthI. Avo cAritramoha to jJAnIne ja hoya. bIjA koIne Avo cAritramoha nA hoya. bIjA badhAne kramika mArgamAM to gADhamoha hoya, avagADha moha hoya. loka mane zuM kahe che ke jo tame pUrNa ho to A moha kema che? paTiyAM (seMthA) kema pADyAM che ? eTale mAre javAba Apavo rahyo ke e cAritramoha che mAro, lokone vyavahArathI samajAvavA mATe, nizcayathI huM karekTa chuM, kampliTa chuM, paNa vyavahAramAM mAre samajAvavuM paDaze. A badhAMne cAritramoha che ja. mane hau cAritramoha kharo. praznakartA : Apane cAritramoha che e kevI rIte ? dAdAzrI : A badhAM jANe che ke dAdA dehanA mAlika nathI. paNa bAjumAM ko'ka pUche mane, ke dehanA tame atyAre mAlika nathI ? to mAre 'hA, mAlika chuM.' kahevuM paDe. nahIM to purAvA emane samajaNa paDe nahIM, eTale bicAro guMcAyA kare. e badho cAritramoha kahevAya. ane A vIMTI paherI che e cAritramoha kahevAya. A kapaDAM paheryA chene ? cAritramoha kyAre jAya ke kevaLajJAna thAya tyAre. tyAM sudhI Ubho rahelo hoya. jyAM sudhI cAritramoha che tyAM sudhI mukti nA thAya. cAritramoha pUrNa thaye kevaLajJAna thAya, eTale thoDo kALa rahe ne pachI mukti thAya. mahAvIra svAmIne kevaLajJAna thatAM sudhI cAritramoha hato. praznakartA : badho cAritramoha khalAsa thAya ne pachI kevaLajJAna thAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, pachI ja kevaLajJAna thAya. praznakartA : tyAra pachI sAdhuveza Ave ? dAdAzrI : pachI veza ja nA hoya. pachI to ene digaMbarI ke nA kahevAya. zvetAMbara-digaMbarathI para hoya e vastu to. e veza ja judo hoya. e veza nA hoya. dehanI koI kriyA hoya te badhI ja cAritramoha. praznakartA : eTale koI vyAkhyAna ApatA hoya to e paNa eno cAritramoha ja kahevAyane ? dAdAzrI : badhuMya, vyAkhyAna ekaluM Apato hoya te nahIM, paNa vyAkhyAna sAMbhaLato hoya teya cAritramoha. huM upadeza ApuM chuM teya cAritramoha. A huM atyAre jJAna ApuM chuM teya cAritramoha. praznakartA to amAro kayo moha ? ame sAMbhaLIe chIe te ? dAdAzrI : e ya cAritramoha. praznakartA : Apa vidhi karAvo cho eya cAritramoha che ? dAdAzrI : hA, badhuM cAritramoha che ane tame vidhi karo cho te ya cAritramoha che. praznakartA H Apane je bhAva che ke ame badhA dhIme dhIme muktine pAmIe to e zuM kahevAya ? Apano moha kahevAya ? rAga kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : evuM chene, Ane cAritramoha kahevAya. moha to kharo ja ne ! moha vagara 78 varSe ahIM koNa Ave upara, khurazImAM besIne ? praznakartA : dAdAno cAritramoha. dAdAzrI : tamAreya cAritramoha ane mAreya cAritramoha. praznakartA : Apa kaho cho e barAbara che, Apaneya cAritramoha ne amAreya cAritramoha. paNa emAM phera paDI jAyane ? dAdAzrI : phera to paDI jAyane ! tamAre to beMkamAM vIsa hajAra gaNavA javuM che, pachI oberoya hoTelamAM jarA nAsto karavA javuM che. mAre evuM kazuM che ? pelo bojAvALo cAritramoha, naryo bojo. amAre cAritramohano bojo nA hoya, halakAM hoya ! bAkI moha to kharo ja. moha vagara koNa pIDA vahore ? kaMI paNa moha kahevA yogya che, paNa moha kyo? cAritramoha. je mohathI pharI navo moha baMdhAto nathI ane je mohanI saMvarapUrvaka nirjarA thaI jAya che. tamAre hau evuM che. paNa tamane bojo

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cAritramoha 331 332 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) hoya, bojo rahyA kare. vIsa hajAra rUpiyA pAchA mUkavA ne lAvavA, ne vIsa hajAra koIe uchInA mAMgyA to upAdhi. praznakartA : dAdA, e cAritramoha Ape je kIdhuM, paNa e jJAnIno karuNAbhAva nA kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : karuNAbhAva ja che e. paNa eka prakArano moha kahevAya. praznakartA : karuNAbhAvamAMya paNa e cAritramoha che. dAdAzrI : moha vagara to koI hoya ja nahIMne ! praznakartA : dAdA, A tIrthakarone kalyANanI bhAvanA hoya, e paNa tIrthakarono cAritramoha kharo ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : badho cAritramoha. kevaLajJAna thayuM te pahelAM. bAramA guThANA sudhI cAritramoha hoya. ane cAritramoha khalAsa thayo ke kevaLajJAna thayuM. praznakartA : pachI emane bhAva nA hoya kAMI... dAdAzrI : nA. pachI dezanA. ane sAme AvIne Ubho rahyo hoyane, Ama 'je je kare, have e narka javAno hoya toya bhagavAna ene ema nA kahe ke tuM Ama thaI jaIza. kAraNa ke khaTapaTa nA kare che. ekanI para rAga ne ekanI para dveSa evuM nahIM ! praznakartA : paNa dAdAjInI AjJA pALavI e cAritramohamAM jAya ? dAdAzrI : nA. e to prajJAzaktino puruSArtha che. cAritramohamAM nA jAya. cAritramoha mahIM paLAvA nA de, e bane evuM. phAIlo bahu bhAre AvI jAyane, to pelA rakhaDI mare. moDuM-vaheluM thAya, thoDIvAra pALe ane Akho cAritramoha bahu saraLa hoyane to bahu sarasa pALavA de. AjJA pALavAthI jAya ghAtakarmo ! praznakartA have A je darzana che enAthI badho A cAritramoha khape chene ? dAdAzrI : zuddha darzanathI jue che eTale cAritramoha khape. praznakartA : mAre pUchavAnuM e ja hatuM ke je cAritramoha khapAvavAnI rIta A darzanathI ja chene ? dAdAzrI : darzanathI ja che. paNa e darzana kyAre rahe ? amArI pAMca AjJA pALe tyAre darzana rahe ne enAthI cAritramoha bilakula UDI jaze. samAdhi raheze ane mokSe laI jaze. praznakartA : eTale mohanIya karma AkhuM khapI jAyane? pachI enI sAthe A darzanakriyA AtmAnI thAya chene ? dAdAzrI : hA. A amArI AjJA che, e ja pALavAthI darzanakriyA ane jJAnakriyA cAlu thaI, enAthI cAreya che te ghAtI karma UDI jAya. jAya jJAtathI darzanamoha te AjJAthI cAritramoha ! praznakartA: ApaNA mahAtmAone darzanamoha kADhI Apyo ane cAritramoha rahyo have, cAritramoha AkhA divasamAM je badhuM bane, te badhuM cAritramoha ja gaNAya. UThyo eya cAritramoha, cA pIdhI eya cAritramoha, e badhuM cAritramohamAM ja jAya. eTale niraMtara peluM cAritramohane cAritramohanA svarUpe ja jue, evI ekjhakTa jAgRti kaI hoya ? dAdAzrI : kahyuM chene ke vyavasthita che, joyA karajo. e AjJAthI mokSa. joyA karavAnuM. game tevuM kArya karato hoya toya tene joyA karavAnuM. praznakartA : eTale A joyA karavAthI cAritramoha UDI jAya ane A pAMca AjJAmAM rahevAthI paNa UDene ? dAdAzrI : e jovAnuM e ja pAMca AjJAne ! rileTiva ne riyala jovuM e AjJAmAM Ave. eTale cAritramoha kADhavA mATe A kaheluM juduM. AMkhe pATA bAMdhIne cAritramoha Ubho karyo ane UghADI AMkhe joIne cAritramohane rajA ApI. praznakartA : A AkhuM asAdhAraNa velDIMga lAge. pelAmAM to gothA

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cAritramoha 333 334 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) khAyA kare, zAstromAM to. ApanuM eka vAkya che, jJAnI puruSanA jJAnathI darzanamoha jAya ane AjJA pALavAthI cAritramoha jAya. dAdAzrI : kharuM che, A beu rahe to kAmanuM. tame jo cAritramohane pakaDo to tamAro, ne nA pakaDo to tamAro nahIM. tame jJAtA-draSTA raho to tamAro nahIM ane kaho ke "mane Ama kema thAya che' to tamAro. je rIte phAve te rIte karajo. praznakartA e cAritramohanIyane je jANe che te ja upayoga chene? dAdAzrI : cAritramohane jANavuM te ja upayoga. jANe tene aDe nahIM. vIMTeluM unne te cAritramoha ! praznakartA : dAdA, eTale darzanamoha gayA pachI cAritramoha che e to ApoApa DiscArja thayA ja kare ? dAdAzrI : cAritramoha eTale je moha pariNAma pAmelo che. eTale ogaLyA ja kare enI meLe, tamAre kazuM karavuM nA paDe. tamAre jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM joIe. tame tamArA svabhAvamAM raho to tamane kazo vAMdho nathI. vakIla vakIlAta kare ane te loko kahe, A vakIla vakIlAta kare che. zI rIte ene cAritramoha kahevAya ? huM kahuM ke ene ja cAritramoha kahe che. jevo vIMTyo hato tevo Ukale. vAMko vIMTyo'to, to vAMko nIkaLyo. sIdho vIMTyo'to, to sIdho nIkaLyo. paNa vIMTyo'to te evo nIkaLe. keTalA bhagavAna DAhyA ! AmAM apavAda mukyA hota to muzkelI UbhI thAtane ? tyAre kahe, jevo vIMTyo'to evo. vakIlAta karIne jUTho kesa hato to tene sAco karI nAkhyo. alyA bhaI, sAco karI nAkhyo. paNa vIMTyo'to evo moha che. teya paNa e to pote jJAtA-draSTA che. Aje enI mAlikI dharAvatA nathI, pachI zI javAbadArI ? eTale jJAtA-draSTA rahe to kazuM che nahIM. vAMko-sIdho tama jevo bharyo hoya tevo. vAMko hoya ke sIdho hoya, ane vAMko-sIdho A jagatanAM buddhinI apekSAe che, samAja vyavasthAnI apekSAe che. bAkI bhagavAnane tyAM to, A vAMko ne A sIdho evuM kazuM hotuM ja nathI. sIdhuM-vAMkuM to ApaNane anukULa nA AvyuM eTale vAMkuM kahyuM ane ApaNane anukULa AvyuM ane Ama sIdhuM kahyuM. ApaNane anukULa nA AvatuM hoya, te bIjAne anukULa AvatuM hoya mATe kaMI ApaNuM A vAMkuM kahevAya ? e to sahu sahuno hisAba che. kalpanA ja che eka jAtanI. vAMkA ane sIdhAthI tamArI dvandAtIta dazA thaI che. eTale tamAre to khAlI jovAnuM. dAdAnI AjJA ja pALavAnI. bIjuM kaMI nahIM jovAnuM. je Ave e, kacaro hoya ke sAruM hoya. jevI parIkSA ApI'tIne evA mArka AvyA che. e joyA karavAnuM. parIkSA ApatI vakhate dAdAne pUchIne nhotI ApI. tame tamArI marajIthI ApI'tI ! praznakartA : paNa have parIkSA pachI A tamArI siphArasa cAlane ? je karatAM hoya e, pAsa thavAnI, mArka mUkavAnI. dAdAzrI : nA. paNa have je tame navuM karI rahyA cho, e mArI pAse che. pahelAMnuM kareluM te to AvI rahyuM che, te joyA karo. eTaluM ja meM kaheluM che. pachI tamane baMdhana nathI ema huM kahuM chuM ! cAritramoha eTale ApaNe tyAM prArabdha kahe chene ! prArabdha ekaluM rahyuM evuM kahe chene ? e cAritramoha. prArabdha bhogavavAnuM rahyuM. e jJAtAdraSTA rahIne bhogava. praznakartA : eTale je vIMTALIne lAvyA chIe e ukela Ave che. ene cAritramoha kahevAno ? dAdAzrI : hA. je mAla vIMTALIne lAvyA chone e pAcho ukale, ene cAritramoha kahe. ane bhagavAna kahe che, 'pAcho ukale emAM rAga-dveSa nA karIza ne jJAtA-draSTA rahe'. ukle DijhAIna pramANe... praznakartA : eTale vartanamoha ahaMkArano kahevAya ? e kono kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : ahaMkArano ja, bIjA kono ? zuddhAtmA to judo che ja

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cAritramoha 33pa 336 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) A. ane DiscArja mohanuM pUtaLuM e juduM che. DiscArja mohanuM pUtaLuM khAyapIve, te paNa e AhArI che te khAya che. vihArI che te cAle che. praznakartA : e cAle che ane pAchuM amuka prakAre cAlavAno evo ene moha che evuM kahevuM che ? dAdAzrI : hA. e jovuM enI DijhAIna che evI ja. navI DijhAIna nahIM. praznakartA H have A DijhAIna pramANe Akho vyavahAra opana thaI rahyo che. dAdAzrI : yojanAnI je DijhAIna hatI, te pramANe badhuM cAlyA kare che. have sarakAramAM yojanA karelI hoya, e ghaNA phere yojanApUrvaka kAma thAya che, paNa ko'ka phero DijhAIna badale che e tyAM AgaLa, ona sAITa. e AmAM badalAya nahIM. praznakartA : have dAkhalA tarIke A mATe amuka kaMpanImAM sarvisa cAle che, to have e DijhAIna pramANe ja hazene AkhuM ? dAdAzrI : haM. praznakartA: to emAM peluM DakhADakhI karIe ke A kaMTALo Ave che, A nathI joItuM to. - dAdAzrI : e DijhAIna ja chene ! A DijhAInamAM jo kadI pote chUTo rahe, jue ke zuM A kare che eTale tuM chUTo. praznakartA : eTale pAchuM pote... dAdAzrI : Ano jJAtA-draSTA rahe. caMdubhAI sAmo thaI gayelo dekhe, toya paNa eno jJAtA-draSTA rahe to basa, thaI gayuM. praznakartA : DijhAInamAM je DakhoDakhala karavA mAthAkUTa kare chene, e paNa DijhAInano ja vibhAga che ? dAdAzrI : DakhoDakhala kare teya emAM DijhAInamAM ja. judA thaIne jovAnuM. nyAya eTale nyAya, nyAya, anyAya thAya nahIM. A to akrama vijJAna chene, A kaMI jevI tevI vAta che ?! praznakartA : akrama vijJAna eTale zuM kahevA mAMgo cho ? dAdAzrI : akrama vijJAna vagara nikAlI bAbata nA hoya. A to bIDI pIto hoya to bIDI pIvA de ane pelAmAM kramikamAM to choDavI paDe. DakhAvALo cAritramoha ! | DiscArja moha enI meLe ogaLI jaze, jo mahIM DakhoDakhala nA karo to. Dakho nA karo, zuM thAya che e joyA karo. praznakartA : cAritramohamAM Dakho thAya kharo ? dAdAzrI : e badhaya Dakho hoyane ! DakhA vagara to moha hoya ja nahIM. moha eTale Dakho. Dakho karyA vagara rahe nahIM. praznakartA : paNa ApaNe ene cAritramoha tarIke samajIe. ApaNe jotAM-jANatAM hoya toya Dakho thaI jAya. dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTAne Dakho nathI hoto. cAritramohamAM Dakho hoya. 'huM nahIM AvuM atyAre.' e pachI Dakho thaIne Ubho rahe. kAraNa ke mAla ja evo bharelo che DakhAvALo. te DakhAvALo cAritramoha nIkaLe. jJAtAdraSTA pAse bIjuM koI vizeSaNa ja nA hoya, Dakho-bakho thAya e tame nahIM, paNa A cAritramohano Dakho hoya. praznakartA : paNa dAdAjI, enuM DakhA vagaranuM vartana kevuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : thoDo ghaNo to Dakho hoya ja. kAraNa ke ajJAnathI ja cAritramoha baMdhAyeluM chene ! ane sajJAnadazAmAM jovAno che. eTale ajJAnatAmAM baMdhAyeluMne ? eTale thoDo ghaNo to Dakho hoya ja. ADAI e to Dakho badho hoya ja. e ADAI e Dakho ja kahevAya, ochAvattA pramANamAM. koIne vadhAre Dakho hoya ane prakRtinI viruddha dekhe eTale ADo

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cAritramoha thayA vagara rahe nahIM. prakRtinI viruddha thayuM ke Dakho karyA vagara rahe nahIM. ene saraLatAthI ukalavA nA de. pote mahIM Dakho mAre. 337 praznakartA : paNa pachI vyavasthitamAM Ave kharuMne ? dAdAzrI : eya vyavasthita ja hoya A badhuM. paNa dekhAya Dakho ke A ko'ka kahe ke bhaI, A Dakho karyo AmaNe pAcho. paNa che vyavasthita. tyAM to chUTako ja nahIMne karyA vagara. 'kare che' evuM bolyo teya aupacArika. kharekhara karyo nathI, e thaI gayelo che. cAritramoha eTale ajJAnatAno Ubho karelo sajJAnatAmAM sabhAnatApUrvaka jovo. saMsArI thayA tyAM ajJAnatAmAM badhuM UbhuM kareluM hoya ane jJAna thAya tyAre manamAM ema thAya ke 'baLyuM, A zuMya lapharAM che' e cAritramoha. niveDo lAvavo ja paDe. e to ApaNo hisAba che. ganegArI ApaNI chene ? ganegArI bIjAnI nahIM. joyA vagaratuM te dhoyA vagaratuM ! praznakartA : Dakho karo tame to cAritramoha kahevAya. tyAM sudhI nA kahevAya. e zuM pAchuM ? dAdAzrI : Dakho e judI vastu che. Dakho kone kahevo ? Dakho karavo ane Dakho thaI gayo be vastu judI che. Dakho karanAra Dakho kare che ane keTalAkane nathI karavo chatAM thaI jAya che, e cAritramohamAM jAya che ane kare che e potAnA mohamAM jAya che. praznakartA : eTale paNa cAritramoha kahevAyane badhAMyano ! ameya badhAMe A pepara vAMcyAM e cAritramoha ja ne ! dAdAzrI : cAritramoha ja che, bIjuM zuM ? paNa e nikAla karatI vakhate cAritramoha judo nahIM rAkho to bhUla che tamArI, nikAla vakhate to tamAre jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM. caMdubhAI vAMce, te tamAre joyA karavuM. praznakartA : nikAlI bhAve dareka vakhate e dazA nA rahelI hoya jJAtA-draSTAnI, to e cAritramoha ja kahevAyane ? AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : che cAritramoha, paNa e cAritramoha cokhkhuM nA thayuM. e lUgaDAM dhoyA vagaranAM rahI gayA. praznakartA : hA, paNa ApaNe rahevuM che jJAtA-draSTApaNe, paNa amuka saMjogomAM e khasI jAya che, to te ghaDIe cAritramoha nahIM ? 338 dAdAzrI : jeTalAM lUgaDAM ema ne ema dhovAyA sivAya gayA e pharI dhovAM paDaze. khasI jAya te ApaNane gamatuM nathI. te ApaNI nabaLAIne lIdhe khasI jAya to pharI jovuM paDaze. eTalA mATe ApaNe betraNa avatAra kahIe chIene ! dhovuM paDe palALeluM chelluM kapaDuM ! badhAM kapaDAMne dhoI nAkhe che e pachI nAhyA pachI eka kapaDuM rahyuM teya dhovuM to paDe ja ne ? paNa chAMTA nA UDe evI rIte sAcavIne dhoI nAkhavuM. pelAM bIjAM kapaDAM dhoI nAkhyAM sAbu ghAlIne mAthe dhAMdhala dhAMdhala karIne, mAthAmAM sAbu UDe toya vAMdho nahIM. paNa nAhyA pachI sAbu nA UDe evI rIte. eTale A chelluM kapaDuM dhoI nAkhe. nA dhovuM paDe ? praznakartA H te Avo sarasa-sacoTa dAkhalo che ! dAdAzrI : hA, e meM kareluM nAnapaNamAM. mane yAda hoyane, amAre tyAM khetaromAM paMpa mUkatA, te garama pANI nIkaLe, peluM phrI oNpha kosTa. boIlaranuM pANI ThaMDuM karavAnuM. garama nIkaLe chene eTale tyAM kapaDAM laI jaIne dhoI nAkhIe. pachI eka je rahyuM chelluM, te chAMTA-bAMTA nA UDe evI rItanA dhImuM karIne eka bAjumAM lAvIne dhoI nAkhIe. evuM A eka rahyuM. jarAya chAMTA nA UDe, Ama Ama thoDuM nIce rAkhIne chAMTA paNa nA UDe. evuM nAhelA-dhoyelA. sAbunA chAMTA UDe ke pAchuM. e to tyAM sattara varSeya buddhi hoya eTalI to. eTalI buddhi nA hoya to zuM kAmanuM ? paNa AmAM hoya, e ja rIta ahIM che A. praznakartA : A jJAna prakAza e sahejAsaheja ? dAdAzrI : e to sahejAsaheja hoya, evuM ekadama paudgalika e

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cAritramoha 339 34 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) vIMTyuM'tuM te ja nIkaLe bahAra, sahaja, vagara mahenate. ane A jJAnanI prApti to durlabha kahevAya. paNa have chevaTe dhoI nAkhazone ? praznakartA: hA. rojeya dhovAtuM ja jAya chene A? eka vakhata tame kahyuM'tuM ke huM kapaDAM dhotAM zIkhavADuM, paNa mArAM kapaDAM nA bagaDe ? dAdAzrI : e to huM potAnAM mArAM bagaDe evAM hoya to zuM karavA zIkhavADuM ? A caMdubhAIno cAritramoha nIkaLe. emane A sthitimAM paNa cAritramoha to nIkaLavAno ja. Akho cAritramoha je bharelo che, e joyA karavAno, e cAritramoha nIkaLe. eTale e koInI joDe gusse thayA hoya, te ghaDIe aMdara sAva judA hoya AnAthI ke Ama na hovuM joIe. te bahAra gusso hoya tenA karatAM aMdara e vadhAre jora hoya. eTale e chUTA rahe che. eTale A cAritramoha zuddha thayo kahevAya ane joIne javA dIdho kahevAya. e joIne jAya tyAre zuddha thaI jAya. ajANapaNe jAya e zuddha nA kahevAya. bharelAto karo nikAla ! cIDavALo cAritramoheya nIkaLI javAno ane rAgavALoya nIkaLI javAno. tene 'jovAnA che ke cAritramohamAM zuM zuM nIkaLe ? rAga-dveSanAM pariNAmavALo mAla nIkaLe, tene ApaNe joyA karavAno. caMdubhAIe ko'kane TaiDakAvyo tenI para tamane dveSa nA thAya. vakhate 'Ama na hovuM ghaTe ema kaho vakhate paNa dveSa nA thAya. vaiSavALo mAla nIkaLe tyAM ApaNe hAlI UThIe e cAle nahIM. pachI koI kaheze, mane gAmaDe nahIM phAve. e haju AgaLa pharIne nikAla karavo paDaze. nahIM to jo sahajAsahaja AvyuM ne ukela lAvI nAkho ke gayuM mULamAMthI. muMbaIvALAne gAmaDe zI rIte phAve ? tame to baMgalAmAM rahelA. huM to konTrAkTano dhaMdho karanAra, te amane badhuM phAve. e pachI ene asara nathI rahetI. nAnA gAmanA moTA mANaso hoyane, ene kahIe ke cAlIne javuM che ke tamAre A TrekTaramAM besIne AvavuM che ? tyAre kaheze, A TekTaramAM besI jaIe. cAlIne thAkavuM zuM karavA ? ane tame zuM kaho ke cAlIne javuM che. kAraNa ke beThelA ja nahIMne AmAM ane ame to gADAmAM beThelA, DamaNiyAmAM beThelA, ame badhAya vezamAM pharI AvyA. amAre koI veza bAkI nahIM rahelone ! ane teya nikAla lAvavo joIene ? avaLuM AvyuM hoyane toya nikAla lAvI devo. praznakartA : nA, A TrekTara to sagavaDa kahevAya. agavaDa na kahevAya. dAdAzrI : nA gamatuM AvyuM che. nA gamatAnAM pariNAma ane gamatAnAM pariNAma, be jAtanAM pariNAma che. te cAritra mohanIya che. na hoya udayakarma mahAtmAone ! praznakartA: Ape eka jagyAe kahyuM hatuM ke ApaNA mahAtmAone udayakarma nA hoya, ene cAritramoha hoya. dAdAzrI : kAraNa ke Amane(mahAtmAone) cAritramohano udaya hoya. ane pelA lokone mULa mohano udaya hoya. A ApaNo cAritramoha che ane pelo eno moha che. eno mULa moha che. cAritramohane joyA karavAnuM kyAre bane ? jagata vismRta hoya tyAre. jagata vismRta kyAre bane ? to e jJAnI puruSanA TacamAM ne TacamAM rahIe tyAre, pelA badhA bhUMsAI jAya, copaDA. Taca eTale kAyama AkhI jiMdagI nahIM, paNa amuka kALa sudhI TacamAM rahyA eTale bhUMsAI jAya badhuM. bhUMsAI gayA pachI pharI UbhuM nA thAya. praznakartA : amuka eTale keTalo ? dAdAzrI : jyAM sudhI bhUMsAyuM nA hoya tyAM sudhI. koInA copaDA majabUta hoyane ? ene vadhu TAIma lAge. jarA moLA copaDA hoya to ochuM lAge. bAkI A cAritramoha joyA karavAno, bIjuM kazuM karavAnuM nathI. joyA karavAmAM takalIpha koI jAtanI hotI nathI. ochI kaMI takalIpha hoya che ?

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cAritramoha 341 praznakartA : dAdA, udayakarma eTale zuM ane cAritramoha eTale zuM ? e bemAM taphAvata zuM ? dAdAzrI : cAritramoha to, jene moha gayelo hoya tene cAritramoha kahevAya. bIjuM AkhuM jagata mohavALuM jagata. e badhuM udayakarma che. praznakartA : e udayakarma eTale zuM ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe karelAM karma phaLa ApavA sanmukha thayA te. praznakartA : eTale mahAtmAone gayA avatAranAM phaLa ApavA Ave, enuM nAma cAritramoha rAkhyuM. udayakarmane badale ? mahAtmAone to AvavAnA ne ? gayA avatAranAM phaLa ! dAdAzrI : mahAtmAone e udayakarma nhoya, e cAritramoha che. jene moha hoya ene, udayakarma hoya. moha nA hoya tene udayakarma nA kahevAya. udayakarma to mANasone hoya, mahAtmAne nA hoya. manuSyo badhAne udayakarma hoya. sAdhu-saMto badhAne. e phakta ApaNA mahAtmAone udayakarma nA hoya. praznakartA : paNa ghaNI vakhata ame mahAtmAone moMDhe udayakarma, bahu vakhata sAMbhaLyuM che. dAdAzrI : sAMbhaLeluM cAle nahIM ne ?! samajavuM paDe. udayakarmo to tuM caMdubhAI thaI jauM tyAre zuM thAya ? kone udayakarma hoya ? praznakartA : caMdubhAIne. dAdAzrI : huM, zuddhAtmAne na ja hoyane ! e kevaLa darzata ! jevA prakArano cAritramoha hoya tevA prakArano Ave, kAyadesarano Ave ke gerakAyadesarano Ave, chatAM huM kaMI ja karato nathI evo niraMtara khyAla rahe, ene kevaLadarzana kahevAya ! bhagavAnane tyAM kAyadesara-gerakAyadesara AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) nathI. A ahIM lokone tyAM che. gAyo-bheMsone tyAMya kAyadesara-gerakAyadesara nathI. A lokone akkalavALAmAM tyAM ja che badhuM. A vyavasthA goThavelI che, ke AvuM karIe to ApaNe badhA sukhI thaIe. eka avatAra badhuM A kAyadesara kare ke gerakAyadesara thaI gayuM, ene jo 'joyA' karene to badhA avatAranI khoTa jatI rahe. pachI rahyuM zuM ? 342 cAritramoha che, bAkI kazuM rahyuM nathI. 'huM kaMI ja karato nathI' e khyAla niraMtara raheto hoyane to pratikramaNa-pratyAkhyAna kazuM ja karavAnI jarUra nathI. e rahe nahIM eTalo badho. eTaluM badhuM mANasanuM gajuM nahIM. eTale dhIme dhIme thAyane Ama ? paheluM AvuM karatAM karatAM pahoMcAya e pada. upayogapUrvaka DiscArja, tyAM AnaMda ! praznakartA : A DiscArja moha ane DiscArja e juduM paDI jAyane ? dAdAzrI : be judI vastu. DiscArja ja thayA karavAnuMne pachI. peluM upayogapUrvaka DiscArja thayuM ane peluM upayoga vagara DiscArja thayuM, eTalo cAritramoha rahyo. have cAritramohamAM jeTalo upayogapUrvaka thAya eTaluM che te potAno lAbha, nahIM to cAritramoha to enI meLe vartyA ja karavAno. upayoga te jAgRtipUrvakano joIe. praznakartA : upayogapUrvaka je DiscArja thAya ane upayoga vagara thAya, potAnI meLe thayA kare emAM pharaka zuM ? dAdAzrI : upayogapUrvaka thAya to lAbha thAya ene potAne. puruSArtha kahevAyane ! upayoga e puruSArtha che. praznakartA : ane upayoga vagara thAya to enuM pariNAma zuM ? dAdAzrI : kazuMya nahIM. pariNAma, bIjuM zuM ? ene lAbha nA thayo. puruSArtha eTalo maMda, e jAgRti nA rahI. dukAne beTho paNa kazuM kAma-dhaMdho karyo nahIM. nukasAna to kAma-dhaMdho nA karyo teTaluM ja. tethI kaMI karma baMdhAvAnA nathI. karma cArja nathI thatuM. paNa pelo cAritramoha AnaMdane baMdha kare. upayoga hoya to AnaMda rAkhe. amAro cAritramoha bahu ocho hoya,

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cAritramoha 343 ame upayogamAM hoIe. e amArI je vidhio ame kahIe chIene, e badho upayoga ja che. be-traNa kalAkanI bapore vidhi hoya, be kalAkanI sAMje hoya, kalAkanI savAramAM hoya, badhI AkhA dahADAnI vidhi. praznakartA H upayoga vagara upazama ne upayoga sahita kSAyaka evuM thayuMne ? dAdAzrI : ApaNe upayoga vagareya kSAyaka ja che A, kSAyaka darzana che. kSAyaka jJAna karavA mATe upayoga karavAnI jarUra e kSAyaka jJAna thAya tyAre kSAyaka cAritra thAya. viSamabhAve azuddha, samabhAve zuddha ! cAritramohanIya eTale samabhAve nikAla karavAno. samabhAve nikAla karyo eTale enI zuddhatA thaIne gayo. zuddhatA thavI joIe. viSamabhAva karyo che eTale A azuddha thayeluM che. have samabhAve nikAla karo eTale zuddha thaI jAya. viSamabhAve bheguM kareluM che. A che te cAritramohanIya, e ApaNI mAlikI hoya. e to dAdAne soMpI dIdhelI che. ApaNe jovAnI che. jeTalI cAritramohanIya zuddha draSTithI joIe eTalI ja cAritramohanIya cokhkhI thaI jAya ane jeTalI rahI jAya eTalI pharI pAchI cokhkhI karavAnI rahe. tamAre rahI jatI nathIne ? praznakartA : koI vAra rahI jAya, dAdAjI. dAdAzrI : ema.... to kyAre jozo ? thaze e ? praznakartA : bIjIvAra karavuM paDaze, dAdA. bIjuM zuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : eTale rahI jAya, te Avate bhava bAkI rahe. e kaMI bahu moTA avatAra mAgatuM nathI. cAritramohato ta thAya tiraskAra ! kSAyaka samakita hoya ane vartana vAMkuM hoya ke sIdhuM hoya toya paNa e cAritramoha che. zAstranI viruddha hoya toye cAritramoha che ane AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) zAstrane anukULa hoya toye e cAritramoha che. cAritramoha eTale A moha dekhAya che moha jevo, paNa e cAritramohanIya che. cAritramohanIya eTale khaseDyo khaseDI zakAya nahIM ane grahaNa karelo grahaNa karI zakAya nahIM. eno to ukela lAvavAno che ne nikAla karI nAkhavAno. kAraNa ke rAjIkhuzIthI bharelo mAlane ! have tiraskAra karAya nahIM. have kaDavo lAgyo. paNa bharatI vakhate mITho ja che evuM mAnIne ja bhareluMne ? eTale A bhAIno mAla bharelo te judo, tame bharelo mAla te judo pAcho. A kaMI navI ja jAtano mAla ! pelAno che e judo, Ano judo evuM badhAM judAM judAM ! maneya khabara paDe ke ahIM AgaLa Avo mAla che. paNa have koI gharAkI nahIMne, nahIM to huMya batAvuM ke bhaI, jA tyAM AgaLa kakaro mAla maLe che. paNa have e vecAtoya nathIne ! 344 praznakartA : dAdA, upakAra che emAM. A amAro cAritramoha nIkaLe che. dAdAe mohanuM mULIyuM to kADhI nAkhyuM ! dAdAzrI : basa, cAritramoha nIkaLe che. A moha e cAritramoha. praznakartA : ame dAdA pAse e ja vinaMtI karavA AvIe ke cAritramoha nIkaLavAnI jhaDapa thAya, eTaluM ja kahIe chIe. e jhaDapa na thAya, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : hA, eTale philma jaladI pUrI thaI jAya to jonAre UThIne ghera javAnuM ! praznakartA : A je Ape vAta karIne ke A badhA prazno pUchIe chIe, bhegA thaIe chIe e badho cAritramoha che. mane to evo vicAra Avato hato ke A badhuM je ApaNane thAya che, rAga-dveSa thAya che, e badhI ApaNe je vAto karIe chIe, prazno pUchIe chIe, paNa rIta to che ke ApaNe je dazAmAM javuM che, emAM A badhuM to kazuM hoya ja nahIMne ? A badhAthI para ja chene e vastu ? dAdAzrI : hA, para che. chatAMya che te A AvyuM hoya to khaseDavuM

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cAritramoha 345 346 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) to paDene ? AvyuM e khaseDavAnuM kharuMne ? rasto to cAlavo paDene ? praznakartA: cAlavo paDe. dAdAzrI : thALI jovAthI kaMI bhUkha maTe ke ? e jJAna-darzana ne cAritra badhuM joIe. thALIne jovAthI bhUkha maTe nahIM. jJAna-darzana-cAritra jovAthI, pachI zraddhA rAkhavAthI, pachI cAritra eTale khAvAthI. tyAre pUruM thAya ane A ApaNe to badhAthI para chIe e zraddhA beThI. paNa A che ene khaseDavuM to paDene ke nA khaseDavuM paDe ? te A khaseDe che badhAM. A cAritramohane vItarAgatAthI nikAla karo. eTale jyAre A bhAI bhego thAyane eTale e pelA gUMcavADAmAM paDelo hoya, vicAromAM. eTale huM kahuM ke, je che e A cAritramoha che. have melone chAla ! amathA juo kevo moha che te ! tyAre e gUMcavADo baMdha thaI jAya pachI. ema karatuM karatuM baMdha thaI gayuM. tanmayAkAra nathI ke nathI cAritramoha ! dAdAzrI : hA. cAritramoha ja che. ene nA koNa kahe che ? praznakartA : paNa tanmayAkAra hoya to ema Apa kaho cho. dAdAzrI : tanmayAkAra hoya to ApaNo cAritramoha che. nahIM to ko'ka pUche ne ApaNe tanmayAkAra nA hoIe, toye koka pUche ke A zuM? A kyA prakArano moha ? tyAre kahe, cAritramoha. ene javAba to vyavasthita rIte Apavo paDe. praznakartA : paNa Ina riyAliTI (vAstavamAM) ? dAdAzrI : e tanmayAkAra nA hoya to cAritramoha nathI. ame to ko'ka ja jagAe saheja tanmayAkAra hoIe. bAkI tanmayAkAra nA hoIe. praznakartA : Apa to kyAMthI hoya? Apane pyaoNra DiscArja hoya che. dAdAzrI : chatAMya kaheze ke A kapaDAM kema pahero cho ? tyAre kahe, cAritramoha' evuM kahI daIene. praznakartA : hA. judApaNAthI, chUTAya cAritramothI ! dAdAzrI : caMdubhAI darzana kare tene tame "juo' te tame chUTA. caMdubhAIne tame 'joyA' karo to cAritramohathI chUTA thayA ane nA joyA to cAritramoha rahyo. nA 'juo? to cAritramoha che haju. jyAre tyAre 'joIne choDavo ja paDaze. badhuM joIne chUTe. 'joIe' paNa eTalo ekkekTa nA dekhAya e vakhate. paNa jAgRti rahe toya bahu thaI gayuM. praznakartA : "jovAmAM' barAbara na paNa jovAya, zAthI ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti na hoya to thoDuM cUkI javAya. praznakartA : paNa ekkekTa joyuM tyAre e kevuM hoya ? dAdAzrI : ekajhekTa 'jovAtuM' nathI. ejhekTa 'jovAnuM eTale ApaNA mahAtmAone cAritramoha kharo. paNa cAritramohane kyAre cAritramoha kahevAya ke pote emAM tanmayAkAra raheto hoya tyAre ja cAritramoha kahevAya. tanmayAkAra nA rahe to cAritramoha nahIM. pote tanmayAkAra nathI raheto eTale potAne cAritramoha nathI. ko'ka pUche tyAre kahevuM paDe ke cAritramoha che. praznakartA : paNa potAne cAritramoha nathI. dAdAzrI : hA. potAne cAritramoha raheto nathI. keTalAka mANasone rahe. je kriyA thAyane tenI mahIM tanmayAkAra sthiti rahe. jame toya tanmayAkAra sthiti rahe. praznakartA : ame atyAra sudhI ema samajatA hatA ke je kaMI thaI rahyuM che e badho cAritramoha che. tanmayAkAra ho ke na ho, DiscArja badho cAritramoha che.

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cAritramoha Ama AkhuM eTaluM badhuM dekhAvuM, e to bahu ekspiriyansa mAMge che. ghaNA kALano joto joto Avelo. tyAre zarIra sAthe badhuM ekjhekTa juduM dekhAya. A tame vAto karo chone, te ahIM sudhInuM badhuM 'joyA' kare. badhuM Ama Ama hAtha karIne vAto kare tene Ama juduM 'jue'. ahIM tame bIjI vyaktine 'joyA' karo evI rIte caMdubhAIne pote judA jue. praznakartA : hA, barAbara, ke ene badhuM juduM ja dekhAya potAnuM. dAdAzrI : juduM che ja ! praznakartA : paNa peluM dekhAtuM nathI, Ane dekhAya ! dAdAzrI : dekhAtuM nathI eTaluM ja nahIM eNe evuM sAMbhaLyuMya nathIne ! koI dahADo sAMbhaLe kazuM to kaMI juduM paDe, ne juduM paDe to kaMIka dekhAtuM thAya. khAlI sAMbhaLe ke mArA dAdAnuM nAma nagInabhAI hatuM to ene prema utpanna thAya. kazuM sAMbhaLavAthI ja khAlI. kazuM joyA paNa nA hoya. evuM A to badhuM sAMbhaLavAthI jJAna pragaTe. pahelI pratIti bese pachI thoDo thoDo anubhava thAya ane pachI enuM cAle. anubhava thayo eTale vartanamAM AvI ja jAya. 347 praznakartA : mana-vacana ane kAyAmAM mananuM judApaNuM dekhAvuM saheluM haze. pachI vANInuM ethI muzkela ane ethI muzkela zarIranuM evuM haze kharuM ? dAdAzrI : kharuMne te to. mananuM to sAdhAraNa ajJAnI mANasaneya juduM dekhAya. kharAba vicAra Ave che e bole che te iTaselpha sUcave che ke evI rIte manane juduM joI rahyo che. praznakartA : hA. paNa e vANImAM eTalo judo na paDI zake. ene bhAna na rahe e vakhate. pachI ApaNe kahIe chIe ke pAchaLathI khyAla Avyo ema. dAdAzrI : hA. e pachI khyAla Ave e to. ane zarIre doDato AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) hoya ane doDato jue tyAre kharuM. caMdubhAI A sAhebane vaDhatA hoya ane te pAchAM tame caMdubhAIne juo. e potAne dekhAya ke "ohoho, A vaDhI rahyA che. zuM joIne vaDhI rahyA che ?" eTale AvI juduM jovAnI vAta sAMbhaLe. A vAta sAMbhaLavAthI AgaLa jAgRti Ave. sAMbhaLI ja nA hoya to jAgRti zI rIte Ave ? 348 ApaNe A khetarane traNa ja khUNAnI vADa che, kahe eTale pachI ene AMkhamAM dekhAya e traNa vADavALuM khetara. e sAMbhaLe pelo. cothI vADa nA hoya. traNa ja vADa nA hoya ? evAM khetarAM nA hoya ? praznakartA : hoya, TrAyeMgalanA hoya ! dAdAzrI : trikoNiyAM khetarAM. evuM sAMbhaLyA pachI ene dekhAya evuM. A to sUkSma, UMDI vaijJAnika zodha che A, nahIM to akrama bolAya nahIM. akrama bolavuM e kaMI sahelI vAta nathI. akrama eTale Akho siddhAMta kahevAya A to ane A vaijJAnika che e. kSaNe kSaNa eka vALa jeTalI jagyA vaijJAnika sivAya nathI AmAM. mArI joDe siddhAMta jue tyAre khabara paDe ! //////////

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[6.1] karmabaMdhata, navuM - jUnuM ! siddhAMta, karmabaMdha taNo ! praznakartA : jJAna letAM pahelAM badhAM kharAM-khoTAM karmo karelAM hoya, to have enuM kevI rIte nivAraNa lAvavuM ? dAdAzrI : e to ghaNAM kharAM karmo ane jJAna ApIe chIene, te ghaDIe pApo bhasmIbhUta karI nAkhIe mahIM bhagavAnanI kRpAthI, tethI to AtmA hAjara rahene, nahIM to AtmA koI dahADo hAjara rahe nahIM. hajAro avatAra phare ne to ye AtmAnuM koIne bhAna ja nA thAyane ! eTale e badhAM ghaNAMkharAM pApa baLI jAya. eTale pAchalAM karmonI have tamAre ciMtA nahIM karavAnI. tamAre to mArI AjJAmAM rahevuM e ja dharma. praznakartA : amane je jJAna thayuM e pahelAM je badhA karmo hatA, tenuM zuM thavAnuM ? e pachI AvatA bhavamAM amane bhogavavAnAM bAkI rahe ? dAdAzrI : e je karmo hatA, te A vakhatamAM ja bhogavAI javAnA. koI paNa karma AvatA bhava mATe sillaka rahe nahIM. navA bAMdhyA hoya eTalAM ja AvatA bhavamAM bhogavavAnA ane jUnA to bhogavAI ja javAnAM. jJAtAgnithI bhasmIbhUta karmo ! praznakartA : dAdAe kIdheluM ke barapha jevAM karmo haju rahyA che. 350 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : traNa prakAranAM DiscArja hoya che. eka varALa svarUpe hoya che, bIjuM pANI svarUpe hoya che ane trIjA barapha svarUpe hoya che. te varALa ne pANI ane nAza karI nAkhIe. phakta barapha ekalo amArAthI nAza nA thAya. e bhogave ja chUTako thAya. juone, bhogave che ne ? barapha ekalo ja bhogave che ane mastImAM rahe che. vijJAna samajI gayA chone ! praznakartA: Ape je amane zuddhAtmAnI draSTi ApI dIdhI e barAbara, paNa have A draSTi ApyA pahelAM je ame nikAcIta karmo bAMdhI dIdhelA e to AvavAnA ja, bhogavavA ja paDavAnA, tenuM zuM ? dAdAzrI : emAMthI ghaNo bhAga UDADI dIdho che. te varALa ne pANIrUpe je jAmI gayA nathI te UDADI dIdhA ane jAmI gayelA e eTalAM bhogavavA paDe e karma. barapharUpe hoya e bhogavavA paDe. kAraNa ke jJAnI puruSa jJAnAgnithI nAza karI zake badhAM karmane. praznakartA : A nikAcIta karmo je bhogavavAnA thAya te AtmA ja bhogave ne ? tyAre enuM kartApaNuM to AvuM ja ne ? dAdAzrI : AtmAne bhogavavAnuM hoya nahIM kazuMya. AtmA to paramAtmA, ene bhogavavAnuM hotuM haze ? A to vyavahAra AtmA bhogave che. sukho bhogavyA te ja du:kha bhogave che. ane du:kha bhogavyA e ja sukha bhogave che e vyavahAra AtmA ane vyavahAra AtmAmAM cetana nathI evuM geraMTIthI kahuM chuM. AkhuM jagata cetana vagara cAlI rahyuM che, paNa cetananI hAjarIthI cAlI rahyuM che. e sAyansa che ne ApaNuM A badhuM. mATe kAma kADhI lejo. huM to eTaluM kahuM, meM kAma kADhI lIdhuM che, tame kAma kADhI lejo. A beThA che mahIM pratyakSa, je mAgo e ApanAra che. A duniyAmAM koI paNa cIja mAgo adhyAtma saMbaMdhamAM, te badhI ja cIja, ahIM keza beMka tarIke rokaDuM ApI de. praznakartA H tamane suratanA bAMkaDA upara jJAna thayeluM, evuM joIe. dAdAzrI : hA. evuM ja ApyuM che paNa tamArI pAse A barapha rahyo

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karmabaMdhana, navuM - jUnuM ! che tene zuM karavuM te ? mArAthI thAya eTaluM karI cUkyo, pachI have tamAre baraphanA gAMgaDA AvaDAM AvaDA hoya temAM huM zuM karuM ?! tArA gAMgaDA nAnA che, A to rAkhI mele barapha. AiskrIma banAvavo haze to kAma lAgaze. praznakartA : barapha jevAM karma kADhavAnuM nivAraNa zuM ? dAdAzrI : ene kADhavA zuM karavA pharo cho ? e to enI meLe nivAraNa thaI rahyuM che, tamAre jJAtA-draSTA rahevAnuM che. 351 praznakartA : dAdA maLyA pahelAMnA barapha jevAM karmo hatA. have e sAmAyikathI ochAM thAyane ? dAdAzrI : ochAM thaI jAya. praznakartA : paNa e taddana nirmULa to nahIM thAyane ema. dAdAzrI : nA. dekhA de, bhaDakAve ne pachI jatAM rahe, bhaDakAveya kharAM. bAkI enI meLe peTI khAlI thAya. peTI khAlI thaI jAyane eTale pachI tame mahIM khoLazo toya jaDaze nahIM. ochAM thavA nathI mAMDyA ? ochAM thatAM jAya, jema TAMkInI mahIM khalAsa thatI jAyane tema. praznakartA : ApaNe A pratikramaNa karIe, prAyazcita karIe, enAthI nikAcIta karmono bhogavaTo haLavo thaI jAya kharo ? dAdAzrI : halako thaI jAyane ! nikAcIta karmo to A AtmAnuM jJAna hoya to ya halakuM lAge. A jJAnathI badhAM karmo halakA lAge, eka maNa vajananuM karma hoya to ajJAnatAthI traNa maNanuM lAge ane jJAnathI daza ratala lAge evo phera paDI jAya. eno TAIma thAya eTale juduM ja thaI jAya. e karmanI nirjarA ja thayA kare. kaMI vAMdhA jevuM nathI. emAM parabhAva hoya to karma baMdhAya, cArja thAya. ane cArja thAya eTale ciMtA zarU thaI jAya. ane ciMtA thAya eTale bhaTakavAnuM duniyAmAM, saMsAra maMDAyo. A vijJAnamAM paradravya ane parabhAva che ja nahIM. jo hoya to e samAdhi Ape ja nahIM. AkhuM jagata parabhAvamAM che ne ! 352 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : mArI jAgRti ochI eTale mane AvuM lAge che. tethI meM pUchyuM. dAdAzrI : nA. jAgRti ochI nahIM. evuM chene, A mArganAM anAdinA anu-abhyAsI. eTale mArga upara lAvyA tyAre pUchavuM paDe ja ne ke A mane zuM thayuM ? A mane kharekhara tAva caDhyo che ke koI ga2mI besI gaI che ? eTale ame kahyuM ke bhAI, tAva nathI, garamI besI gaI che. eTale pUchavuM to paDe ja. e ajAgRti nathI ! kaDavA phaLamAM AnaMda AvarAya ! praznakartA : aMdara kaMI progresa thAyane eTale AnaMda vadhe, pachI pAcho ocho kema thaI jAya ? dAdAzrI : ocho ja thaI jAyane paNa A pAchalA karmanA udaya Ave che ne te dhakko mAre ne ! e dhakkA lAgaze eTale pachI nA Ave AnaMda. pAchalAM karma kharAM ne ! phaLa Ape tyAre mIThAMya lAge che ne ! sAruM jamavAnuM Ave tyAre mIThuMya lAge ne ! te ghaDIe sAruM lAge pachI peluM kaDavuM lAge. kaDavAM ne mIThAM beu phaLo cAkhavA paDe. pachI kaDavAM-mIThAM cAkhavAnA nahIM, eka ja jAtano AnaMda. ekadhAro AnaMda AvI jAya. mIThuM Ave tyAre bhUlI javAya chene thoDIvAra ? praznakartA : have badhuM nA gamatuM hoya e ja vadhAre karavuM paDe che. dAdAzrI : je gamatuM hatuM ne tene nA gamatuM karyuM. have nA gamatuM lAgyuM eTale avaLuM lAge. nA gamatuM che ja paNa te to ApaNe gamatuM karyuM hatuM, te pachI phasAyA hatA. //////////

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354 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : vyavahAramAM pragaTa thatAM vAra lAgaze ! kAraNa ke tamAro AcAra je chene, e AcAra badalAya nahIM tamAro, eTale vAra lAge. amAre AcAra badhA khalAsa thaI gayA hoya eTale amAre vAMdho nahIM. paNa tame mArA jeTalA ja jJAnI, paNa tamAro AcAra barobara nA hoya. praznakartA : eTale Apa jJAnI cho ne pelA bhAIe jJAnI che, to emAM taratamatA kharI ? [6.2] AcAra sudhAravA ! akrama eTale AcaraNamAM nahIM te ! praznakartA : vItarAga vijJAna vItarAga vijJAnI pAse pAmyA pachI. pUrI samaja AvyA pachI, samaja jJAnamAM pariNamavAnI koI samaya maryAdA kharI ? dAdAzrI : samayanI maryAdA to kharIne ! haMmezAM jJAna ApaNI pAse hoya, tene pragamatAM TAIma lAge che. jema A dUdha hoya, emAM saheja dahIM nAkhIe pachI tarata dahIM mAMgIe to nA bane. ene mATe cha kalAka ke ATha kalAka joIe. nA joIe ? evI rIte A samaja jJAnamAM pariName e amuka TAIma pachI thAya. praznakartA : badhAne judI judI rIte thAya ? dAdAzrI : hA, darekane judI judI rIte, jevAM AvaraNa. koIne be kalAkamAM ya thaI jAya ane koIne be varSamAM ya nA thAya. AvaraNa upara AdhAra rAkhe che. moha upara AdhAra rAkhe che. dAdAzrI : jJAnamAM phera nahIM, AcaraNamAM phera ! praznakartA : to e vastu AcaraNamAM lAvavI bahu kaThina kAma che ? dAdAzrI : AcaraNamAM lAvavAnuM hoya ja nahIM. akrama eTale AcaraNa nahIM. e anubhava to enI meLe AvyA ja kare. kAraNa ke A DiscArja chene, te nikAla ja karavAno che. bIjuM kazuM karavAnuM nathI ! ame zuM kahIe ke emanA AcAra bhaNI nA jozo. emane pala solva thayeluM che. je mananA vicAra, vANInA uccAra ane dehanA AcAra e badhAM che te e DiscArja vastu che. DiscArja vastune koI mANasa pheravI zake nahIM ane cArja vastu judI che. cArja e badalI zakAya. AcAravicAra-uccAra na badalI zakAya. kAraNa ke DiscArja che e. ApaNA loko DiscArjane jo jo karyA kare che. ta vaTavuM paDe vijJAnanA kAraNe keTalAya jaNane A jJAna ApeluM che. koIneya vaDhato nathI. tamArA AcAra UMdhA dekhAya to ya huM vaTuM nahIM. kAraNa ke AcAra to jJAna thaze tyAre pheraphAra thaze. atyAre A to samajaNa paDI che ne ? samajIne zamAvAnuM che. mArI pAse besI besIne samaja samaja karavAnuM. be rastA, eka UMdho ne eka chato. chate raste AvyA pachI bIjuM zuM thavAnuM ? UMdhuM zI rIte thavAnuM ? bIjo rasto ja nathI tyAM AgaLa. UMdhA rastAthI tame viruddha cAlyA cho. pahelAM je raste cAlyA hatA, te UMdho praznakartA : A jJAna mahAtmAone ApyuM. to have enA AcaraNamAM A jJAnanuM pragaTIkaraNa keTaluM thavuM joIe ?

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AcAra sudhAravA ! 355 356 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) hato ane tame tenAthI viruddha cAlyA cho. have eTale chate raste cAlyA pachI tame kyAM bhUlA paDavAnA ? ane vakhate mahIM jarA khUMcaze, te dahADe tarata badhA pUchavA Avaze ke ahIM AgaLa mane zuM thAya che ? ane tyAM AgaLa kramika mArgamAM to badhA AcAra jovAmAM Ave che. ahIM AcAra ApaNe baMdha karI dIdhA. eTale koIne vaDhatA nathI ne ! AcAra joIne koIne vaDhIe chIe kaMI ApaNe ? praznakartA : nA, kadI nahIM. dAdAzrI : ane tyAM to AcAranI vaDhavADamAM ja, mahIM aMdara kharAba vicAra Ave teno vAMdho nathI. tenI koI khabara paDe ja nahIMne ! tyAM AgaLa sAmasAmI laDhavADa zenI che ? sAmasAmI AcAra kharAba dekhAya eTale. kAraNa ke aMdara je vicAra kharAba Ave, tenuM koI joI zakatA nathI. e ApaNe aMdaranuM A sudhAyuM. bahAranuM baMdha rAkhyuM che ane bahAranuM te vastu ja judI che. kAraNa ke pariNAma pAmI gayelI vastu che. eTale kaoNjhIjharUpe nathI atyAre. AtmAno anubhava thayA pachI koI guno ja lAgu thato nathI evuM A akrama vijJAna che. eTale mAre koIne vaDhavo ja nathI paDyo atyAra sudhI. kAraNa ke nahIM to dara trIje dahADe mAre vaDhavo ja paDe. be ziSya hoya ne eka guru hoya, to ziSyane vaDha vaDha karavo paDe. kema tame Ama karo cho ne kema tema karo cho ? paNa A akrama vijJAna che eTale koIne vaDhavuM ja nA paDe. hoya A AcArasaMhitAno mArga ! bAkI Ama AcAra sudhare, emAM zuM bhalIvAra Ave ! A AcArasaMhitAno mArga ja nhoya. ApaNI zodhakhoLa bahu UMDI che. sAyanTiphIka (vaijJAnika) zodhakhoLa che A. jagata AkhuM AcArasaMhitA upara ja cAleluM. pachI vicAra game tevA AvatA hoya, paNa AcArasaMhitA sArI joIe. ko'ka dahADo khUna karAvavuM che ne peloya jANe ke huM enuM khUna karAvuM. e sAthe pharavAnAM AcAra to bahu sArA dekhAya che, paNa ene zuM karavAnA ? eTale AcAra ame A badhA UDADI melyA. te AcArathI mokSamArga zodhavA nIkaLyo hoyane, to AmAM ekuMya mANasa mArga pAme nahIM. ekya AcAra badalAya nahIM ne eno dahADo vaLe nahIM. ApaNe AcAra ja UDADI melyA. akrama zAthI kahevAya che ke AcArane UDADI melyuM. AkhA jagatanA dharma AcArasaMhitA upara che ane ApaNe ethI viruddha chIe ke AcArasaMhitAnI mokSamArge jarUra nathI. kevo sarasa A mokSamArga ! bilakula harakata vagarano. badhI bAjuthI tALo meLavI zakAya. aMdhArAmAM tALo maLe. ajavALAmAM tALo maLe. praznakartA : A AcArano Akho ApaNe cheda UDADI dIdho to A samyak AcArane mATenuM koI sthAna kharuM ? dAdAzrI : nA. e to jene e AcAra hoyane, te ene potAne phAyado ane jenA AcAra sArA nA hoya, tene saheje ema ne ema duHkha thAya ahIM ne ahIM. prophiTa enDa losa e pote bhogavI le. ane ahIM sArA AcAravALAnI khyAtiye bolAya ke caMdubhAIno svabhAva sAro ane koI kharAba hoya teno kharAba che svabhAva, evuM kahe. paNa mokSane mATe AcAra naDatAMya nathI ne phAyado karatAM nathI. mokSane mATe AcAranI no velyu, velyu vagaranuM karI nAkhyuM. mokSa javuM hoya to AcAranI jarUra nathI. have ahIM saMsAramAM sukha joItuM hoya to AcAranI jarUra che. mokSe javuM hoya to mokSano mArga tuM samajI le. tAro AcAra jovAnI amAre kaMI jarUra nathI. ane jo tAre ahIM bhautika sukha joItuM hoya, to AcAra sivAya kazuM cAlaze nahIM. te AcArathI ya sukha nahIM maLe pAchuM. AjanA AcAra badhAMnAM che e AcAranuM phaLa zuM ? enuM phaLa sukha nathI AvatuM, duHkha Ave che. A samyak AcAranuM phaLa duHkha Ave che. enuM kAraNa e che ke AcAra che paNa mana-vacana-kAyAnI vahu ane dhaNI be sAthe pharavA nIkaLyA hoya, vahu jANe ke Ane

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AcAra sudhAravA ! 357 358 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ekatA nathI. eTale kAyAno AcAra suMdara che. mane kahe che AvuM nA thavuM joIe. te AcAra nakAmA jAya che ne UlaTuM nukasAna kare che. A sArA AcaraNavALA zuM kare che? rAte agiyAra vAge mahemAna Avene, te kaheze, 'Avo, padhAro, padhAro, padhAro." ane aMdara zuM cAle ke "atyAre mUA kyAMthI AvyA ?" have bhagavAne zuM kahyuM ke A tAruM khoTamAM gayuM, mUA. A mahIM karyuM e tAro puruSArtha che. A sAruM AcaraNa to DiscArja che. hA, dUdhapAka DhaLI gayo ne chAza lIdhI te ! pachI dAna Apene to ya kaheze, "meM caMdubhAInAM dabANane laIne ApyA, nahIM to huM ApuM nahIM." bolo, have AkhuMya dAna UDI gayuMne ? eTale A kALamAM evuM thaI gayuM che. praznakartA : eTale dAdA, to akramanI aMdara to evuM thayuM ke A aMdaranI badhI pariNatI badhI zuddha thatI jAya. dAdAzrI : ekramamAM mULeya aMdarathI ja zarUAta thAya che. kramika mArgamAM zuddhatA paNa aMdarathI thaI zake nahIM, enuM kAraNa kepesiTI nathI, evI mazInarI nathI eTale bahAranI rIta lIdhI che. paNa te bahAranI rIta aMdara kyAre pahoMce ? mana-vacana-kAyAnI ekatA hoya tyAre aMdara pahoMce ane pachI aMdara zarUAta thAya. mULamAM to mana-vacana-kAyAnI ekatA rahI nathI. jagate sTepa bAya sTepa, krame krame karIne AgaLa vadhavAno mokSamArga khoLI kADhelo che. paNa te kyAM sudhI sAco ke manamAM hoya, evuM vANImAM bole ane evuM vartanamAM hoya tyAM sudhI e mokSamArga cAlyA kare. nahIM to e mArga baMdha thaI jAya. te A kALamAM mana-vacana-kAyAnI ekatA tUTI gaI che eTale kramikamArga phrekyara thaI gayo che. tethI kahuM chuM ne A krimikamArganuM bejhamenTa saDI gayuM che, eTale A akrama nIkaLyo che. ahIM badhuM elAu thAya che, tuM jevo hoya evo. ahIM tuM mane bhego thayone, mATe besa ! eTale ApaNe to bIjI bahAranI bhAMjagaDo ja nahIM karavAnI. game eTalo samyak AcAra hoya, game evA hoya toya e Avato bhava devALiyo che. kAraNa ke mana-vacana-kAyAnI ekatA rahetI nathI. ekatA rahe to samyak AcAramAMthI AvatA bhavanuM samyak AcAranuM bIja paDyuM. A to ekatA nA rahI eTale bI UMdhuM paDyuM. eTale A manavacana-kAyAnI ekatA che nahIM. e to meM sAdhu-AcAryane pUchyuM, bhaI, ekatA che ?" tyAre kahe, 'nathI." tyAre meM kahyuM, "melo, poka melo jaMgalamAM jaIne.' ane ApaNe A kevo mokSamArga Ama ! dIpI UThe evo ! mahAtmA bhItarathI sadA saMyamI ! koI mANasa AvatAM tamAruM pAkITa gajavAmAMthI laI le, te ghaDIe tame ene zuM karo ? saMyamamAM raho ke asaMyamI thAva ? praznakartA : have saMyamamAM ja rahevAya. dAdAzrI : tarata ja saMyamadhArI thaI jAva. A badhA saMyamamAM rahe che. ATaluM badhuM mANasa, te ajAyabI kahevAya ne ? ane jagata sArA AcAramAM asaMyamI che. A jJAna lIdhA pachI aMdara saMyama hoya ! mArI zodhakhoLa che ke A jagata AcArane mAnya kare che, huM che te AcArane mAnya karato nathI. AcAra e pariNAma che ane saMyama ke asaMyama e kaoNjhIjha che, navI parIkSA che. eTale parIkSA sAcavavI joIe ke pariNAma sAcavavuM joIe ? paNa atyAre parIkSAmAM to UMdho cAle che, mUo. A pahelAMnI parIkSA ApelI, tenuM A pariNAma AvyuM. paNa have to parIkSA UMdhI Ape che ne ? te tame A pahelAMnI parIkSAmAM nApAsa thayA, paNa have navI parIkSAmAM saMyama che ne ? eTale ame AcAra jotAM nathI. koInA sArA hoya, teno vAMdho ya nathI ApaNane ane nA sArA hoya teno ya vAMdho nathI. A jagata zuM kahe che ? nApAsa kema thayo? pAsa thaI jA. parIkSA ApyA vagara zI rIte ? pharI parIkSA Ape tyAre pAsa thavAya. te parIkSA ApyA pachI keTalAMya varSo thAya tyAre pariNAma Ave, AcAra sudhAre. tyAre pelo kahe, huM AcAra sudhAravA jauM chuM, paNa sudharatA nathI. sudharAvanAra ne sudharanAra banne gAMDA thaI jazo. A jANyA vagaranI vAta che, koI jagyAe koI sudharyo evuM khoLI lAvo.

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AcAra sudhAravA ! 359 na palaTe AcAra, phare bhAva ! AkhuM jagata 'dravya' palaTavA phare che. dravya palaTavA eTale AcAra pheravavA mAge che. dehanA AcAra, mananA AcAra, vANInA AcAra pheravavA mAge che. dravya nathI phare evuM, mATe bhAva pheravI nAkha. 'dAdA' pAse jJAna laIne bhAva pheravI nAkha. eTale jagata AkhuM chUTyuM ! AkhuM jagata dravya palaTAvavA jAya che, je sattA potAnA tAbAmAM nathI, tene palaTAvavA jAya che ane sattAmAM che te pheravatA nathI. A jJAna maLyA pachI bhAva badhAM pharI jAya. AcAra, vicAra ne uccAra e dravya kahevAya. dravya na palaTe. paNa jo bhAva palaTe, pachI TAIma thAya tyAre dravya to ogaLI jAya. ApaNe so maNa baraphano Dhagalo ghera lAvI mUkIe, to ya TAIma thAya eTale khalAsa thaI javAno ne ! e bAju juo ke nA juo to ya khalAsa thavAnuM ne ?! ane sAcava sAcava karavA mAMDe to ? to ya sacavAya nahIM ne mahenata nakAmI jAya. mATe pharI jA, Ama ebAuTa Tarna, pUMTha daI de. jJAna maLyA pachI pUMTha devAya, nahIM to nA devAya. eTale zAstrone zIkhavAnI jarUra nathI, 'dAdA'ne zIkhavAnI jarUra che. dAdAne joyA ja karavAnAM che. jovAthI eka ja avatAramAM badhuM dravya parivartana thaI jAya. khAlI jovAthI bhAva ja evAM thAya ke AvI vANI, AvuM vartana, AvuM mana ! te evAM ApaNA bhAva thAya ! ane A badhuM to ogaLI javAnuM. pUMTha daIne beThAM eTale ogaLI javAnuM. paNa navo barapha kyo kharIdavAno ? A dAdAnI AjJA pALo chone to navo eka avatArano barapha joIe, te taiyAra thaI jAya. A pAchaluM eka-be avatAramAM chUTI javAnuM, paNa navo barapha to cokhkho bhego thavAno. akramamAM UDADyo bAhyAcAra ! A kramika mArga zuM kahe che ke bAhyAcAra palaTAya, pachI bhAva palaTAya to chUTe evuM che. tame ghera rahIne kyAre sarvAMza thaI raho ne kyAre tamArA bAhyAcAra palaTAya ? tyAM zI rIte bAhyAcAra palaTAya ? eTale A mArga bilakula akrama che ane sAyanTiphika(vaijJAnika) che ane ochI AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) mahenate kAma thAya evuM che. bAhyAcAra e amArA jJAnamAM joyuM che ke e nyuTrala vastu che. e amArA jJAnamAM joyA pachI A mArga mUkyo che ane te A bhagavAnanI AjJA laIne mUkyo che. eTale bAhyAcAra UDADI dIdho ame. aMtarAcAra zarU thaI jAya che, je enI meLe ja phelAto phelAto bahAra AvIne Ubho raheze. ane peluM kramikamArgamAM bahArathI aMdara javAnuM ane A akrama mArgamAM aMdarathI cokhkhuM thatuM thatuM bahAra AvavAnuM. eTale bAhyAcAra jovAno nahIM. bAhyAcAra badalAya nahIM. kAraNa ke prakRtiguNa che ne ! 360 A to vijJAna che. bAkI kramika mArganuM jJAna je che ne, te badhuMya che te AcAra joyA vagara AgaLa bIjI vAta cAle nahIM ane ApaNe ahIMyA AcAra jotAM nathI A. evuM lAge che tamane ? atyAre game te mANasane game te AcAra hoya paNa huM ene vaDhuM nahIM. ane pelAmAM to ? tela kADhI nAkhe. kramika mArganA guru kaheze, 'kema bIDIo pIo cho ? bIDI choDI do !' ApaNA vijJAnamAM A jJAna ApatI vakhate suTevo ane kuTevo beune bAjue besADI daIe chIe. ApaNe suTevonA grAhaka nathI ane kuTevonA tyAgI nathI. ApaNe puNyAcAra ne pApAcAra bannene bAjue besADI daIe chIe. ApaNe puNyanA ya grAhaka nathI ne pApanA ya tyAgI nathI. eTale A eka avatAranA udayane koI pheravI zake nahIM. janmathI je udaya che te maraNa sudhInA udayane koI pheravI zake nahIM. AcAra, vicAra te uccAra, nhoya AtmAtA ! AcAra be prakAranA che : eka durAcAra ne eka sadAcAra. ane temAMya AtmAmAM to AcAra che ja nahIM. je care tenAmAM AcAra hoya. AtmA carI khAya evo che nahIM. AcAra, vicAra ne uccAra e traNeva AtmAnA hoya. uccAra kono ? TeparekarDano. ane vicAra konA ? mananA. AcAra kAyAno, emAM AtmAne zuM levA-devA ? AtmA judo, A badhAM judA. A AcAra e to kAyAno dharma. te koI kaheze, huM sadAcArI mANasa, ghaNAM varSathI

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AcAra sudhAravA ! 361 362 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) sadAcAra pALato Avyo chuM. tyAre kahe, sadAcArI mANasa thA ne, koNa nA pADe che ? sadAcArI thayo, e to pudgala thayo ne ? pudgala sadAcArI hoya e AtmA sadAcArI hoto haze ? e AtmA to paramAtmA che. ApaNuM vijJAna evuM che ne, A traNevane juduM mUkI dIdhuM bAjue, DiscArja svarUpe. je A dasa lAkha varSamAM nathI banyuM evuM A navenavuM banyuM che ! nahIM to AmathI jaIe to kyAre pAra Ave ? AcAra sudhAratAM sudhAratAM, vANI sudhAratAM sudhAratAM, mana sudhAratAM sudhAratAM kyAre pAra Ave evuM lAgatuM'tuM AmAM ? koIno pAra Avaze kharo, A lokono ? UlaTAM vadhAre guMcavADAmAM UMDA UtaratA jAya, kAdavamAM. eTale mane nAnapaNathI ema lAgatuM'tuM ke Ano pAra Ave nahIM. A Tekaro te Ama rahIne dekhAya. te Ama rahIne savA karoDa mAIla cAlavAnuM. alyA mUA, evuM to A dekhAya che. tyAre kahe, 'vacce brIja bAMdhyo nathI.' A brIja bAMdhI dIdho ApaNe haDahaDATa ne kahyuM, 'Ama rahIne jAva.' pelA sAdhuo Ama rahIne sATha lAkha mAIla sudhI cAlyA che ne, peluM to karoDo mAIla cheTuM che. have sATha lAkha mAIla pAchAM AvavAnuM gamatuM nathI emane. ane ApaNe to gayA ja nahotA ne ? zuM AmAM kADhavAnuM che ? anaMta avatArathI baphAya baphAya karyA, keTalo baphAro ! ThaMDaka thaI badhAne ! A badhA AvyA, te badhAne ThaMDaka varte che ne ? praznakartA : badhAne ThaMDaka. dAdAzrI : hA, mArga che sonAno ! mokSano mArga aMtarmukhI ! A bhAI pahelAM kriyA pheravavA bahu gayelA, prayatna karIne ! saMto kahe, kriyA Ama pheravo, A kriyA pheravo." alyA mUA, AjanI kriyA to pratikriyA che. pratikriyA pharatI haze ? IphekTa che. enAM kaoNjha baMdha karAva ne ! A badhAne pUchyuM ke bhaI, viSaya saMbaMdhI tamAro abhiprAya hato e pharI gayo ? to kahe, 'hA. saMpUrNa, so TakA.' to pratikriyA ne amAre levA devA nathI. have A aMtarmukhI mArga, jagata AkhuM bAhyamukhamAM hoya, beno meLa eka kalAkeya zI rIte thAya ? tamArI pratikriyA joIne ciDhAyA kare pelo. zuM joIne dAdA pAse jAya che ? kazuM sudharato che nahIM, evo ne evo ja che, kaheze. ta khoLo AcAra akramamAM ! A zarIra evI badhI vastu sthaLa che ne, te sthaLamAM kaMI phare evuM nathI. te jevuM mahIM goThavIne taiyAra lAvyA hoya, te pramANe AcAra badho nIkaLe ne tethI AcAramAM loko khoLavA jAya ke A akrama vijJAnInA mahAtmAonA AcAra juo, to tyAM AcAra jovAmAM majA nahIM. kAraNa ke AcAra phare nahIM. bIjuM badhuM pharI jAya, AMtarika phare, bahAra nA phare. e AMtarika pharavAthI mokSa. bahAra pharavAthI mokSa thAya agara nA paNa thAya. praznakartA : paNa AMtarika phare, enA pariNAme bahAranuM na phare ? dAdAzrI : bIjA avatAramAM bahAranuM phare. A atyAre DiscArja che, e to gayA avatAranuM A badhuM che. A to nA ya pheraphAra thAya. amArA rUbarU tame bebIne TaiDakAvatA hova gusse thaIne, to ame tamAro doSa nA joIe ke A tamAro doSa che. ame jANIe ke A mAla bharelo che e nIkaLe che, evuM samajIe. koI utAvaLo cAle ke koI dhImo cAle, temAM kazuM pheraphAra thAya nahIM. bharelo mAla che ! A Avaka nathI ne jAvaka ekalI rahI che. mATe amukanI e jAvake jo ochI thaI jAya to pachI enuM badhuM khalAsa thaI jaze. navI Avaka nathIne eTale khalAsa thaIne pachI navI ja jAtanuM thAya. eTale A tamArI jAvaka e keTalo vakhata rahe ? e amuka kALa sudhI ja rahe. pachI badhuM ya khalAsa thaI jAya. pahelAM tamAre Avaka ane jAvaka e beu cAlu hatuM eTale bheLaseLa nIkaLatuM hatuM. have A ekalo ja bhAga UDI gayo cArjano ane rahyuM DiscArja, e DiscArja badhuM jatuM raheze. praznakartA : amoe ApanI pAse jJAna lIdhuM ane A satsaMgane

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AcAra sudhAravA ! varasa thayuM, temAM bahAranA vartanamAM paNa pheraphAra dekhAya che. bhASA kaThora hatI, ene badale narama thatI jAya che. 363 dAdAzrI : have e jema jema bharelo mAla ocho thato jAya che, tema tema pheraphAra dekhAya. ApaNA loko je khoLe che evuM ekadama nA jaDe. ane tamane potAne khabara paDe ke ochuM thatuM gayuM. bIjA lokone to caMdubhAI evAM ne evAM ja dekhAya. A badhAne kyAre dekhAya ? A badhuM ja khAlI thaI jaze, tyAre pachI manamAM thaze ke A caMdubhAI pahelAM hatA tevAM hoya. jevA bhAve baMdha, tevA bhAve nirjarA ! evuM che ne ke AcaraNa e pudgalamAM je bharyuM che, te nIkaLaze. pudgalano artha zuM ? pUraNa kareluM. pura ane gala. be zabdonuM pudgala thayuM. e pura eTale pUraNa karelo mAla. tame gayA avatAre je pUraNa kareluM che, te A avatAramAM galana thaI rahyuM che. have bolo, galana thAya temAM tame rAga-dveSa karyA karo eno zo artha che ? to bharatI vakhate jovAnI jarUra hatI. atyAre nIkaLatI vakhate zuM ? eno upAya ja nahIMne, e to thayA ja karavAnuM. ene joyA karIe, jJAtA-draSTA ja rahe, je thAya te. kAraNa ke pUraNa karatI vakhate jovAnuM hoya che. to te vakhate to jJAnI puruSa maLyA nA hoya eTale je phAve e bajAramAMthI kharIdI karI. je bhAve baMdha thayuM che, te bhAve ja nirjarA thAya. nirjarAmAM phera paDe nahIM. ta bolAya 'have vAMdho nathI' ! ghaNA lokonA AcAra sArA hoya che paNa aMdara bahu ja kharAba hoya che ane AcAra bhale ApaNA mahAtmAonA kharAba hoya to ya paNa aMdara kevA DAhyA ! praznakartA : A vAta siddhAMtanI che paNa keTalIka vakhate amArAthI zuM thAya che ke dAdAnuM A vacana chene, te A ekAMtika vacana pakaDI levAya che ke amArA AcAra-bAcAranuM kaMI nahIM, e badhuM aMdaranuM juo have e. dAdAzrI : e pakaDI le che, basa. e pakaDI levAnI jarUra nathI. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) tamAre samajavAnI jarUra che ke bhaya nahIM rAkhavo joIe AvuM banI jAya to. paNa pakaDI lo to tamAruM kAcuM rahI jaze. praznakartA : pakaDI laIe chIe ne enA bacAvamAM besI jaIe chIe. 364 dAdAzrI : nahIM, bacAvamAM nA besAya. haMmezAM evuM che ne ke jema kUvAmAM nathI paDavuM evo nizcaya tamAro draDha hoya che ne ! so-baso kUvA hoya ahIM AgaLa ane temAM rahIne raste AvavA-javAnuM hoya, to aMdhArAmAM kaMI paDatA nathI. kAraNa ke tamAro nizcaya che ke mAre game te thAya paNa kUvAmAM nathI paDavuM, eTale e nA paDAya. paNa tame jo kUvAnA bacAvamAM jAva to paDAya. nizcaya to joIe ne tamAro, A to huM zenA mATe kahuM ? tamane pakaDI levA mATe nahIM, tamane bhayarahita banAvavA mATe kahuM chuM. tamArA A bAhyAcAra AvAM che, vAMkA che, teno vAMdho rAkhazo nahIM. eno artha tamAre pakaDI levAnI jarUra nahIM, tamAre to ema ja rAkhavAnuM ke A na ja thavuM joIe, basa. pachI thaI gayuM, ene leTa go kahIe chIe. ApaNe zuM kahyuM ? vyavasthita kone kahIe chIe ke bhaI, UghADI AMkhe gADI hAMka ane te sAvadhAnIpUrvaka hAMka ane pachI athaDAI te vyavasthita. pachI guno tamAro thaI jAya teno vAMdho nathI, e vyavasthita che paNa A sAvadhAnIpUrvaka hovuM joIe. praznakartA : dAdA, e nirbhaya banavA mATe Apa kaho cho paNa sAthe sAthe A vartaNUMka atyAranI mArI AvI che e joIne mane evo vicAra nA thavo joIe ke A meM kevo mAla bharyo che ? dAdAzrI : e to Avavo ja joIe ke meM baLyo, Avo mAla bharyo ! paNa e thAya badhAne. badhAya thAke-kaMTALe ne badhAne game ya nahIM A, paNa zuM thAya ? koI upAya ja nahIM ne bIjo ! eTale tamAre phakta eTaluM na bolavuM joIe ke have mAre kazo vAMdho nahIM. evuM tamAre bephAma na bolavuM joIe. eTaluM ame kahevA mAMgIe chIe. bAkI ame je ApeluM che, e to tamane kazuM thavAnuM nathI evuM je jANIne ja ApeluM che, tame bephAma nA bolo to !

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AcAra sudhAravA ! 365 praznakartA : paNa dAdA, ApanuM jJAna A thayuM, badhuM thayuM, have huM ema kahuM ke have mane vakIlAta karavAno koI vAMdho nathI, to pachI ? dAdAzrI : nA, e evuM na bolAya. tame vakIlAta karo, jeTalo vakhata karavI hoya eTalo vakhata, paNa 'A vAMdho nathI' ema bolyA e pelA kAyadAne toDe che. jokhama nA UbhuM karo. e to jokhama UbhuM karavuM e be pATA vacce phIza pleTa kADhI nAkhavI, e sarakhI che. e gADI DIrela thaI jaze. evuM bolAya nahIM. bolavAnuM zA mATe ? ame to eTalA mATe kahyuM che ne 'bephAmapaNe bolazo nahIM, ke mane kaMI ja naDavAnuM nathI.' have evuM bolazo nahIM. kAraNa ke loko ko'kane A dekhADavA mATe pAvaramAM bole che ke 'have amane dAdA mAthe che, amane kaMI nA thAya'. to e pAvara naDaze, nA bolAya evuM. praznakartA : Ape to eTalo badho saraLa-sugama mArga batAvI dIdhelo che, paNa pachI jo satata jAgRti nahIM rAkhIe ane pAMca AjJAo jo nahIM paLAya to dAdAe je jJAna ApyuM che te zastrarUpe pariNamaze. dAdAzrI : to rakhaDI jAya. chatAM DahoLAI gayeluM ghI divelamAMthI nahIM jAya, ghaNAM avatAra ochAM thaI jaze. paNa A je tame dhAro cho e sthAne jaldI nahIM pahoMco, pAMca AjJAo baMdha thaI gaI to. A kALa ja Akho kusaMgano kALa che. gharamAM kusaMga, ophisamAM kusaMga, vyApAramAM kusaMga, jyAM juo tyAM kusaMga, kusaMga, kusaMga. A AjanA je satsaMgo bahAra cAle che te ya naryo kusaMga ja che. jo tame ahIMyAthI bIje jAva ne to e tamArA mATe kusaMga che. have evAM kALamAM jo A pAMca AjJA nA hoya to e koI kusaMga ene khaI jAya. eTale pAMca AjJA pALe eTale kusaMga aDe nahIM ene. nahIM to ahIM paDI raho, pAMca AjJA nA pALavI hoya to mArI joDe paDI raho, to ya kusaMga nahIM aDe. chatAM A jJAna le che tyArathI pojhiTiva bhAva to thaI ja jAya mahIM ene. praznakartA : thaI ja jAya barobara che, dAdA. Ape kIdhuM ke pojhiTiva thayA eTale saMjogo maLI Ave. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : mANasamAM negeTiva hoya che te gUMcavADAmAM nAkhe che. mATe pojhiTiva ja raho. A jagatamAM jyAM sudhI mANasa bhayathI dhrUje che, tyAM sudhI koI paNa prakArano dharma pAmI zake nahIM. ame tamAro koI bApoya uparI nathI' kahIne tamAro bhaya-phaphaDATa cogaradamano kADhI nAkhIe chIe ne bIjuM kaMI bhaya lAgato hoya to e tamAro kADhI nAkhIe, teno artha negeTivamAM laI jAva to kharAba thAya, evI chUTa ApavA nathI mAMgatA ! 366 praznakartA : dAdA, amane amArA vikAsanI aMdara kayA kayA bhayasthAno che te paNa ApanI pAsethI pUchI laIe. kAraNa ke pachI ApanuM koI vAkya evuM ame noMdhAruM UpADI laIe, enA karatAM ahIMyAM pUchI laIe to zuM vAMdho che ? dAdAzrI : noMdhAruM vAkya UpADavAthI bahu muzkelI paDI jAya. mane pUchone to vAMdho nA Ave ane have mane kazuM aDavAnuM nathI' evuM bolavAmAM e ekaluM jokhama che. ame kahyuM che ne ke 'viSayo viSa nathI, viSayomAM niDaratA e viSa che'. eTale mane kahe che ke mane have kaMI thAya nahIM, dAdAno thaI gayo chuM eTale.' niDaratA thaI e ja viSa che. bephAma thaI gayo ke thaI rahyuM, khalAsa. e sthAna ja nhoya e to. nathI tame AtmAmAM, nathI tame phAIlamAM, AvuM bephAmapaNuM ! 'mane koI aDe nahIM' e kyAMthI AvyuM A ?! praznakartA : barobara che, pelA AtmAmAMya nathI ane phAIlamAMya nathI. dAdAzrI : AmAM beu jagyAe nathI ane A navo kyAMthI Avyo ? eTale e jokhamavALuM che eTale ame kahIe chIe ne ke 'bhaI, ame tamane e bhaya kADhI nAkhavA kahIe chIe ke viSayo viSa nathI, paNa viSayomAM niDaratA e viSa che.' kAraNa ke A AcAranAM jokhama nathI, te badhuM meM jJAnathI joIne kahyuM che. nahIM to ATalI badhI koNa vahore A jokhamadArI ?! e to bahu jokhamadArI kahevAya. ane to ja tame ekadama nivRtta ja thaI jAva ane to ja tame A bhayathI chUTo. bhayathI chUTI jAva ne bIjI tamArI zaMkA

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AcAra sudhAravA ! 367 kuzaMkA e badhuM je vahema hatA e UDI jAya badhA. Ama thaI jaze ke tema thaI jaze, e kazuM thavAnuM nathI mUA. tane kazuM thavAnuM nathI, huM chuM ne tuM chuM, kahIe ! AmAM A mAre joItuM nathI agara to A khoTuM che, eTalo ja tamAre abhiprAya rahevo joIe. Aye sAruM che ne peluMya sAruM che, e be abhiprAya thayA to bagaDyuM. dUdha ne dahIM be sAthe na rahI zake. eTale kriyAno amAre vAMdho nathI. amAre to tamArI pratIti nA badalavI joIe. praznakartA : pratIti nA badalAya to je vastu rahe te DiscArja phormamAM rahe che, barAbara ? dAdAzrI : pratIti nA badalAya eTale basa thaI gayuM. eTale tamArI javAbadArI nahIM. pachI javAbadArI mArI. Aye sAruM, teya sAruM, beya sAruM kare to javAbadArI tamArI. A nA hovuM joIe, chatAM paNa thayA kare to ene javAbadArI nahIM. paNa jyAM sudhI phAIla che tyAM sudhI thayA karaze. eka dahADo eno hisAba pUro thaI jaze ke chUTuM. eya chUTuM ne Aya chUTuM ! [6.3] pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? ta kaDhAya bhUla vartatatI ! praznakartA H jJAna lIdhAM pachI haju ema rahyA kare ke ApaNe ATaluM badhuM vartanamAM to AvatuM nathI, krodha thaI jAya che. jevI rIte ApaNe Adarza rIte rahevuM joIe e rIte rahevAtuM nathI, to A haju cAritramoha jato nathI ? dAdAzrI : vartananI bhUla nA kADhe to cAritramoha jaze ane vartananI bhUla kADhaze to cAritramoha nahIM jAya. vartananI bhUla kADhavAnI nahIM bilakuleya. zuM vartana thAya che e joyA karavAnuM. vartananI bhUla kADhavI eTale pote hato teno te ja dehAdhyAsa utpanna thayo kahevAya. pote pAcho e svarUpa thaI gayo ! mUA, ajJAnI hato tyAre vartananI bhUla kADhato hato. have jJAna thayA pachI vartananI bhUla kADhe che ? jevuM vartana hoya, e vartananI bhUla nahIM kADhavAnI bilakuleya. have ene joyA ja karavAnuM. A jJAtA-draSTA svabhAvamAM AvyA tame. pahelAM kartA svabhAvamAM hatA. e jUnI Adata jatI nathI haju. zraddhA - anubhava - vartata eka mANasa A jANato hoya ke abrahmacarya karavuM e khoTuM che. brahmacarya pALavAmAM ja niraMtara zraddhA che. pachI anubhavamAM paNa evuM AvyuM ane vartanamAM nA paNa hoya.

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pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? 369 praznakartA : eTale zraddhA anubhava sudhI pahoMce ? dAdAzrI : zraddhAmAM AvyuM, have e zraddhAmAM AvelI vastu dhIme dhIme anubhavamAM AvatI jAya. anubhava saMpUrNa thAya tyAre vartanamAM jAya. e vartanamAM nA paNa hoya. paNa tethI karIne ApaNe enuM vartana jovAnuM nathI. zuM zraddhA che e jovAnI. kAraNa ke traNa eTa e TAIma thatuM nathI. praznakartA : eka-eka, sTepa bAya sTepa che. dAdAzrI : hA. tethI A jokhamadArI ame laIe chIe ne ! e ame jANIe chIe ke ame A zraddhA pheravIzuM pachI vAMdho nahIM. bIjuM cho ne loko bUmo pADe. eTale ame e zraddhA pheravI ApIe. cakkara kADhIne cheTA rahI jaIe chIe ane loko vartana pheravavA jAya che. e eno rasto ja nathI. vartana kyAre phare ? bilipha phare keTalAM avatAra thAya, tyAra pachI vaLI zAna phare tyAre vartana phare. have badhAnA apalakSaNa dekhAya che mATe kaMI mAre vaDhavuM emane ? nA. emane vidhi karI ApavAnI. vartana joIe nahIM, mahIM enI zraddhAmAM zuM che, e huM jANuM chuM. bolo, have vartana upara vaDhavADa karAya ? praznakartA H na karAya. dAdAzrI : zraddhA enI pharI che ke nahIM, eTaluM ja jovAnuM. AvuM A vijJAna koI nahIM bole bahAra. bahAra vartana khoLaze, chokaro khoLaze. alyA mUA, paNa mAbApa vagara chokaro zI rIte thayo ? tyAre kahe, nA. chokaro haze to mAbApa Avaze. evuM bane ? praznakartA H bane nahIM, paNa mAne che ne ! dAdAzrI : evI gAMDI vAta kare che loko. tAruM vartana nathI phareluM paNa mahIM zraddhAmAM phareluM che ke nathI phareluM ? praznakartA : pharyuM che. dAdAzrI : tyAre jJAnamAM thoDuMghaNuM karyuM che ke nathI pharyuM ? ke Ama AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) to anubhavamAM AvyuM che ke A khoTuM ja che, chatAMya pAchuM e kArya thAya che ke nathI thatuM ? praznakartA : dha. 370 chelle thaI javAze jJAtI ! dAdAzrI : tame jANanAra cho khAlI. nakAmA hAya hAya karavI ane hAya hAya thatI hoya to ya caMdubhAIne thAya, tamane zuM ? ane jema jema A jJAna pariNAma pAmaze ne tema tema e ya badhuM UDI jaze. caMdubhAI pote ya jJAnI thaI jaze. pariNAma pAmavuM joIe. tyAre loka kahe che, mahIM amalamAM nathI AvatuM. alyA, amalamAM lAvavAnuM ja nathI. A jJAna amalavALuM nathI. kAraNa ke Ane pratIti ja karAvavAnI jarUra che tamAre. praznakartA : pachI pratIti kAma kare. dAdAzrI : A takalAdI che tenI pratIti beThI. e pratItinuM phaLa zuM Ave ? roja roja anubhava thato jAya ke A takalAdI che, takalAdI ja che. ane pachI ene vartanamAM Ave ke A takalAdI, aDe nahIM pachI. ApaNe AtmapakSanA chIe. saMsArapakSa chUTato nathI. zraddhA besI gaI che ke A khoTuM che. pachI vartanamAM AvavuM eno TAIma le. eTale tyAM sudhI buddhi kAma karyA kare, e potAne khabara paDe ke A Dakho kare che. kAraNa ke zraddhA besI gayelI che. eTale pote jANe che ke A khoTuM che, chUTavuM che. chatAMya paNa A chUTako ja nA thAyane ? praznakartA H to e vartanamAM kyAre Ave pAchuM ? dAdAzrI : paheluM zraddhAmAM AvI jAya, e samajaNamAM AvI jAya, zraddhA utpanna thaI. dAdAe kahyuM e samajaNa mane phITa thaI gaI. AtmA, AtmA thaI gayo ne bIjuM, bIjuM thaI gayuM. juduM paDI gayuM. te samajaNamAM AvI jAya. pachI che te dhIme dhIme che te jJAnamAM Ave, eTale anubhavamAM Ave ane anubhavamAM AvyA pachI vartanamAM Ave.

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372 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : sonA uparathI zraddhA UThI gaI. haju vartanamAM rahyuM che, enuM zuM kAraNa che ? jeTalo mAla bharelo che eTalo vakhata vartana raheze, pachI to A paheravAnuM ya mana nahIM thAya. evI rIte zraddhA badhI UThatI jAya. sonAmAM je sukha mAnyuM hatuM, lakSmImAM sukha mAnyuM hatuM, badhuM sukha mAnyuM hatuM, te sukhanI zraddhA UThatI jAya ane pelI zraddhA besatI jAya. have sonA upara bahu bhAva thato nathI ne ! praznakartA : nA. pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? 371 praznakartA je samajaNa AvI ane vartanamAM Ave, e be vacceno je TAIma kharo, enI aMdara je kaMI paNa kriyA thAya, e cArja ke DiscArja che ? dAdAzrI : nA, cArja nahIM. e DiscArja nA thAya tyAM sudhI TAIma jAya badho. kAraNa ke pAtaLuM hoya to UDI jAya, eka avatAramAM. bahu jADuM hoya to vAra lAge. paNa anubhavamAM AvI javuM joIe. praznakartA : pratikramaNathI e gAMTha ogaLe kharI ? dAdAzrI : pratikramaNathI gAMTha pAtaLI paDI jAya. paNa anubhavamAM AvavuM joIe. eka aNu jeTaluM paNa sukha nA lAgavuM joIe saMsAramAM, tyAre anubhavamAM AvI gayuM kahevAya. vartanamAM, atyAre rAtre sUI gayo hoya ane UMgha sArI AvI gaI hoya to kahe, 'hAza, sArI UMgha AvI.' to paNa A zemAM sukha lAge ? tyAre kaheze, A UMghamAMthI. e AtmAnuM sukha nahIM. to have e badhuM saMsAranuM sukha to pratItithI UDI gayuM badhuM. A jJAna maLyA pachI, AtmA maLyA pachI badhuM UDavA ja mAMDe, e dhaMdho zo ? UDavA ja mAMDyuM. nahIM to lAkha avatAre UDe nahIM. eka phero UDADyuM hoya to pharI coMTe pAchuM. kharato jAya moha ! dAdAzrI : pachI zopIMganuM ? praznakartA zopIMga to baMdha. je jarUrI hoya e vastuo levI paDe. paNa je pahelAM hatuM ke huM A lauM, te lauM, e UDI gayuM. dAdAzrI : badhuM UDI jaze dhIme dhIme ane manamAM zAMti raheze. peluM to zopIMga karatAM ya apAra du:kha, DaoNlara kharcatAM ya mahIM AkuLa-vyAkuLa ane A kharco nahIM ne zAMti ! praznakartA : ApaNo vyavahAra kuTuMba joDe sArI rIte thavo joIe, eTalI to bhAvanA kharI jANe. dAdAzrI : sArI rIte thavo joIe, e eka hakIkata che ApaNI. pachI bane e paNa sAcuM che chevaTe. ApaNI hakIkatamAM evuM hovuM joIe ke ApaNe inDiyAmAM javuM che. paNa pachI plena tuTI paDe, te paNa sAcI vAta che. ene kaMI nA kahevAya nahIMne ! eTale A to bIjuM kaMI nahIM. ApaNe pojhiTiva hisAba rAkhavo, negeTiva bane tene leTa go karavo. kAraNa ke A badhuM maratuMjIvatuM nathI, AtmA kazuM marato ya nathI ne jIvato ya nathI. jJAna phiphTa thayuM pratItimAM ! A ApaNA mahAtmAone jJAna che, badhuM ya che, paNa pratItimAM che ne pratItine ame sarvasva kahIe chIe. bhale tArA vartanamAM nahIM hoya, tenI mAre jarUra nathI. tArI pratItimAM che, to badhuM sarvasva thaI jAya. kAraNa ke pratItivALo sarvasva thaze ane sarvasvavALo sarvasva hoya yA nA paNa hoya. eTale te samajaNamAM AvyuM. samajaNano artha pratIti beThI ke sonAmAM sukha nathI, paNa pachI vartanamAM sukha to lAge che haju. sonAmAM sukha nathI e samajaNa besI gaI ApaNane, AtmA judo paDyo eTale, paNa pachI jJAnamAM AvyuM nathI. jJAna eTale anubhavamAM nathI AvyuM. e jyAre sonuM pahereluM hoya, te ko'ka mArIne laI jAya, tyAre thAya che, baLyuM, A sonA para moha ja khoTo che. e mAra khavaDAvyo e pachI jJAnamAM AvyuM. anubhavamAM AvyuM eTale pachI vartanamAM Ave. e sonuM nA pahere pachI. have sonA uparathI zraddhA UThI gaI ? praznakartA : hA, ghaNI UDI gaI.

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pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? 373 374 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) suvAsathI loka kheMcAya ! praznakartA : dAdAnA paricayamAM AvanAra ne dAdAnA satsaMgamAM rahenArAnuM cAritra je che te aMdarathI khIlatuM hoya, to pachI enI suvAsa bahAra dekhAya kharI ke nahIM, dAdA ? dAdAzrI : badhuM jeTaluM khIle ne, eTalI ja suvAsa bahAra Ave. aMdara khIlyuM hoya to ya bahAra Ave ane bahAra khIlyuM hoya to ya bahAra Ave. khIleluM to kaMI gupta rahetuM nathI. are, tame manamAM bhAva nakkI karyo hoya ke A mahAtmAone mAre koI paNa jAtanI aDacaNa nathI paDavA devI evo bhAva karyo hoya ne, to ya mahAtmAne pahoMcI jAya vAta. tame koIne kahyuM nA hoya to ya vAta pahoMcI jAya evuM A vijJAna che. A evAM badhAM pApa dhovAI gayAM che ke e eTaluM badhuM kliyara thaI gayuM che, ke atyAre tame AvuM aMdara gupta kaMI karazo to ya paNa badhAne pahoMcI jaze. Aja che te vartana bahu suMdara hoya, paNa mahIM pratIti zenI para beThI hoya ke amerikA jaIne sAro bijhanesa karavo che. pratIti kyAM che e jovuM joIe, bIjo bhAga jovAno nathI. have ApaNA mahAtmAo che, te enI vAiphe kapaDAMnI beunI peTI joDe joDe mukI hoya, to potAnAM thoDAM kapaDAM dhaNInI begamAM mUkI dIdhA. ane pachI dhaNI jue te bUma pADe che ke mArI peTIne tuM aDI ja kema ? le, ene A jJAna che, pratIti che. le mUA paNa vartana AvuM ? tyAre kaheze, e to vartana to AvuM ja ne ! haju vartana badalAyuM nathI. vartana badalAtAM vAra lAgaze. 'mArI peTIne aDI ja kema ?" A mArI ne tArI karI nAkhene ke nA kare ? 'tArI peTI' ahIMthI laI jA, mela pULo ahIMthI. have e mAla pahelAMnI pratItino bharelo che. Aje je pratIti che, have eno mAla bharAze tyAre joI lejo A. eTale ame e pratIti ane enAM jJAnane pheravIe chIe, enI pratIti bese eTale ene mATe satyuga thaI gayo. pratIti beThA pachI bahu bhAMjagaDa nathI AvI. samajAya tema Ave vartanamAM ! ApaNane kahe ke rasto huM samajI gayo ane pachI gayo UMdhe raste. eTale ApaNe nA samajIe ke A samajyo nahoto ! jo samajyo haze to te pramANe raste pachI ApaNe bhUlA paDIe nahIM. mArgamAM ApaNe bhUlA nahIM paDIe evuM samajI lo. ane bhUlA paDyA eTale to samajayA nhotA ane pAcho kahe zuM ke huM samajyo hato. samajamAM Ave eTale pachI pariNAma e pramANe thAya ja ne ! amalamAM Ave ne ! tamane to badhuM Ave che samajamAM ! samajamAM nA Ave to vartanamAM nA Ave. badhA mahAtmAone jema jema samajamAM AvatuM jAya che ema vartanamAM jouM chuM pachI. mane khabareya paDe ke Amane samajamAM beThuM ane vartanamAM AvyuM. praznakartA : eno matalaba e ke kaSAyo jAya, eTale ke koI paNa jAtano kaSAya Ubho nA thAya eTale samajamAM AvyuM ja kahevAya ne ? dAdAzrI : e to bahu UMcuM samajamAM AvI gayuM. e to ghaNI UMcI samaja AvI gaI, e to vAta ja judI ! praznakartA : paNa dAdA, mAruM zuM kahevuM che ke dAdA pAse je Ave che, tenI aMdara darekane evI bhAvanA thAya che ke amane je maLyuM, te lokone kema karIne maLe ! have lokone ApavA jaIzuM to loko to peluM joze pahelAM. dAdAzrI : hA, e to e juene paNa !! praznakartA : eTale have dAdA pAse AvanArAonI amuka prakAranI DisiplIna, amuka prakAranuM.... dAdAzrI : e to dhIme dhIme Avaze. paNa hamaNe to tamArI jAte karavA jazo to bIjuM tamAruM joI ane tamArI khoDo kADhaze, 'A tame kema vakIlAta karo cho ?" kaheze. eTale tamAre to ene zuM karavuM e Ama aTAvI-paTAvIne ahIM dAdAnI pAse teDI lAvavA. huM rAge pADI dauM pachI. keTalAMya rAge paDI gayAne ! atyAre tame rAge pADavA jazo to nahIM paDe. kAraNa ke vAMdhA UThAve ke tame Ama kema karo cho ? ane mane evuM kahe nahIM ne ! mArI pAse kahevA jevuM che nahIM ne !

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pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? 375 ta jozo DisiplIna, paNa jo jo vItarAgatA ! praznakartA : eka vAta jarA, hRdaya kholavAnuM mana thAya che ke ApanI ujavaNInA prasaMgo badhA UjavAya, janmadivasa UjavAya che, A badhA prasaMgo UjavAya che, e ujavaNI karanArAnA bahu atizaya bhAvo hoya che. AvanAranA paNa atizaya bhAvo hoya che. paNa cheka chellA TAIme evuM thaI jAya che ke koI vyavasthA sacavAtI ja nathI bilakula, geravyavasthA evI thaI jAya che ke ame koI mANasane bahArathI je bolAvIe chIe ke 'Avo, A prasaMge Avo, to A geravyavasthA joIne e kaMIka judA vicAro laIne jatAM rahe che. dAdAzrI : kharI vAta che. praznakartA : eTale have ene mATe dAdA, zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : evuM thaI jAya, enuM kAraNa zuM ke AmAM jaza ne apajazanI paDelI nathI. A to samabhAve nikAla kare che. eTale bahAra kharAba dekhAze ke nahIM e paDI nathI. praznakartA : dAdA, A to bahu UMDI vAta che ! dAdAzrI : e huM jANuMne, ke A zAthI nathI thatuM. to have AmAM zI rIte pahoMcI vaLavuM ! e svabhAva to chUTavAno ja nathI ne, ene choDIne ApaNe zuM kAma che ? je banyuM te karekTa, enA bIjA phAyadA ya haze ne ! nikAla karIne heMDe eTale pachI A bAju jovAnuM nahIM. ane pelAmAM to TheTha sudhI evuM hoya ke mAruM nAma vagovAya, mAruM e thAya, kharAba dekhAIza. samajAyuMne A, mULamAM A khoDa che. praznakartA : AnAthI to dAdA, ghaNo ghaNo amane ughADa thayo A vAtathI to. dAdAzrI : nA. eTale huM samajI gayelo ke A khoTuM zuM che te ! tene dhakelavA kareluM, paNa A khoDa zuM che te ame samajI gayelA. paNa e khoDa tUTe evI nhotI. AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : e khoDa tUTe evI nathI. paNa enA pramANamAM lAbha to atizaya che, e vAta barAbara che. 376 dAdAzrI : hA, ApaNe kAma sAthe kAma che ne ! ApaNe kaMI kIrti ne AbarU vadhAravI che ? praznakartA : paNa dAdA, amArA pelA saMskAro laIne AvelAne, te e saMskAro keTalIka vakhata evA UMcA thAya ke bahAranA mANasone lAvelA che te e loko paNa prabhAvita thAya. dAdAzrI : e prabhAvita thavAthI kaMI e sudharI jAya che evuM kazuM hotuM nathI. e to khAlI Taca thAyane A mahAtmAono toya bahu thaI gayuM. prabhAvita eTale AmanA kAryathI prabhAvita thAya, eno artha ja nahIM ne ! pAse Avyo ne, e prabhAvita ja thaI jAya. praznakartA : have e jyAMthI Ave che tyAM AgaLa bIjuM kazuM nathI hotuM paNa vyavasthA ane DisiplIna e lokonI Topa hoya che. dAdAzrI : bIjuM badhe ya hoya. ahIM ekaluM DisiplIna nA hoya. praznakartA : A to bahu hRdayanI vAta karI che. paNa bIje koI prasaMgamAM gayA hoya to tyAM joIe chIe tyAre e lokonI je DisiplIna hoya che.... dAdAzrI : e badhI banAvaTa che ne ahIM banAvaTa nA hoya ne ! praznakartA : paNa dAdA, ahIMyA evuM bane che ke koI vyaktine koI kAma soMpeluM hoya ane dAdAne joyA eTale kAma bAju upara mUkI ane tyAM jatA rahe che, have enuM zuM karavuM ? to evuM mArAmAM nA thavuM joIe ne ke A dAdAnuM kAma huM karI rahyo chuM te dAdA ja che ahIM AgaLa ane mAre na javuM joIe tyAM AgaLa. dAdAzrI : evuM darekanI prakRti nA hoya ne ? praznakartA : dAdA, paNa A to sarvAMza evuM thayuM che, pelI

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pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? 377 378 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) gopIonI mAphaka thaI gayuM che. A to gopIonI mAphaka dhaNI ne enuM ghara-bara badhuM mUkIne ekadama doDatI doDatI badhI jAya, evI badhAnI dazA thaI gaI che. dAdAzrI : plAniMga kare to ya vAMdho nahIM. paNa te hoya eTalo ja mAla nIkaLavAnone, bIjo nIkaLavAno nahIM ! plAniMga karo ne to ya enI pAse je mAla che eTalo ja nIkaLavAno. navo ahaMkAra Ubho thAya nahIM ne ! dAdAzrI : A Ama ja hoya. A je che ne e ja jAya che. sahu sahunI prakRti pramANe che. koI ekalo ja bhAta khAto hoya e kaheze ke have bhAta ja khavaDAvo badhAne, to zuM rahe ? bhAta ApaNI pAse Ave bhAgye ! e badhuM hisAba che te pramANe ! ane ApaNe koIne teDI lAvIe ne, tene ya kahI devuM ke A lokone evI kaMI kazI paDelI nathI, eTale chevaTe AvuM hoya, tevuM hoya, tene e jozo nahIM. jovA jevI che vItarAgatA emanI pAse. hA, ahIM to AvuM ja hoya. praznakartA : paNa DisiplIna rAkhavAthI nukasAna zuM che ? zA mATe nA rAkhavI joIe ? dAdAzrI : ene mATe kartA AtmA mUkavo paDe. praznakartA: kartA mUkavo paDe tyAM AgaLa ane e to zakya ja nathI, A jJAnamAM e zakya ja nathI. dAdAzrI : ane peluM to je che e nIkaLe che. praznakartA : A zaMkAnuM samAdhAna thaI gayuM. dAdA. paNa A pelA saMskAro che te ene goda-goda karyA kare che. dAdAzrI : A che e barobara che. ame ya hisAba kADhI nAkhelo ne, pahelAM amane manamAM ema lAgeluM ke AvuM avaLuM kema thAya ? pachI kADhI nAkheluM A. A to niveDo lAvavAno che. ahIM to vItarAgatA jovAnI che, prema jovAno che. A lokonI prakRti kevI che, e kahI devI pahelethI. tyAM to vItarAgatA jovI hoya to Avo, kahIe. praznakartA: dAdA, eno artha ApaNe A prasaMga thAya, ene pahelAM ApaNe plAniMga ke sisTameTika goThavavAnuM na karavuM joIe ? praznakartA : paNa dAdA, evuM thAya che ke A vyavasthAnuM mane kAma soMpyuM ke tamAre ahIM AgaLa UbhA rahevuM, ane je koI mahAtmA ke bahAranA je mANaso Ave, tene tamAre ahIM A pramANe gAIDa karavA. paNa huM dAdAne jouM chuM ne eTale vyavasthAne tyAM vyavasthitane soMpI daIne, huM to ToLAmAM bhaLI jauM chuM dAdAnI sAthe. dAdAzrI : e to vAjAMvALAne jJAna ApI do ne to vAjAMvALA hau AvatA rahe. huM kahuM ApaNe to A vaTemArga judI jAtanA che ane pelA judI jAtanA che. praznakartA : dAdA, e vAta ApanI to hRdayamAM besI gaI che. dAdAzrI : eTale loko mane kahe ke tamArA bhakto eDavAnsa thayelA nathI. tyAre meM kahyuM, eDavAnsa haju thavAnA che. ApaNe to mokSa sAthe kAma che ne, ApaNe bIjuM kazuM kAma ja nahIM ne ! praznakartA : lokakalyANa karavA mATe jyAre ApaNe nIkaLIe chIe ne e ApaNI je bhAvanA che to pachIthI AnI aMdara e hisAbe je badhA Ave che e jo AvI vyavasthAno Avo bhAga joI jAya to loka kalyANanI pravRttine pachI vega maLe ke pachI tyAM AgaLa amAre bIjo kaMIka vicAra karavo paDe ? dAdAzrI : ApaNI bhAvanA joIe, lokakalyANanI kriyA nahIM. A bIjI kriyA to mahIM je mAla bharelo che te ja nIkaLaze. mAla bharelo te nIkaLe ke bIjo ? praznakartA : e ja nIkaLene, dAdA. paNa eka prazna e thAya che ke jyAre AvuM saMmelana bheguM thAya, jyAre badhI prakRtione ApaNe bhegI

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pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? karIe chIe, A badhuM thAya che to vyavasthA jevI vastuno ApaNe vicAra na karavo joIe ke pachI e vyavasthita ja gaNavuM ? 379 dAdAzrI : che ja vyavasthita. jeTalI lAIno cItarazo e badhI bhUMsI nAkhavI paDaze pAchI. ApaNe cItarI ne ApaNe bhUMsavAnuM thaze. paNa bhUMsavuM sAruM eka phero. e pharI bhUla nA thAya ne evI. praznakartA : bAkI eka vastu nirvivAda che ke ApanA prasaMganI aMdara je badhA AvIne bese che ane pachI e je Apane sAMbhaLe che ne te vakhate je badhAno ullAsa hoya che ne 'dAdA bhagavAnanA asIma jaya jayakAra ho' bole che e joIne bhalabhalA mANaso AvIne badhA ti thaI jAya che. dAdAzrI : e to AvuM badhuM jovAnuM. praznakartA : ke AvuM ToLuM ke A prakAranuM to... dAdAzrI : ene AvuM jovAmAM ja nA AvyuM hoya ne ! praznakartA : e bAbatamAM kazuM koIne kahI zakAya evuM nathI. dAdAzrI : AvI duniyA ja jovAmAM nA AvI hoya. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, e badhuM ame jyAM sudhI lAvIe badhAne ke have A badhuM juo to pahelAM je peluM vAMceluM che ne, tyAM muzkelI paDI jAya che. dAdAzrI : e to emane kahI devuM joIe ke A mAla Avo che. ahIM vItarAgatA jovA jevI che ane khAsa aDacaNa Ave to mane kahejo kahIe, basa. nahIM to aDacaNonuM saMgrahasthAna che A. A ToLuM judI jAtanuM che. ane te ToLuM sarasa kAma kare che ne ! juone, tyAM jamatuM hatuM te koI dahADo kakaLATa-bakaLATa che kazuM koI jAtanuM ? kakaLATa-bakaLATa hoya nahIM ! 380 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : to AvAM je amane uchALA Ave che A saMskArane lIdhe to enuM zuM karavuM ? dAdAzrI : A badho bharelo mAla che. bIjAne bhareluM nA hoya. kazuM karavAnuM rahyuM nahIM, mahIM je che e thaze. navuM AvavAnuM nathI. praznakartA : e dAdA kharuM, paNa A badhuM pI.eca.DI.nI vAta thaI. paNa ApaNe to A badhA pAchAM pAThazALAvALAone badhAne bhegA karIe chIene A prasaMge. dAdAnuM vijJAna badhA samaje, dAdAnuM vijJAna badhA sAhityakAro samajAve, have pI.eca.DI.nuM emanI pAsethI vartana kevI rIte espekTa thaI zake ? dAdAzrI : emane kahI devuM ke bhaI, ahIM vItarAgatA jovA jevI che. je bahAra jagatamAM jozo, enA karatAM judI ja jAtanuM jovAmAM Avaze. ahIM prema jovAnI jarUra che. tame khoLazo, eno ukela nA hoya. praznakartA : paNa A bahAranA mANaso je che, te have AvuM pUche che te vakhate keTaluMka manamAM ema thaI jAya che ke A loko AvuM ja ahIM joI gayA. bIjuM kaMI jovAnuM nA maLyuM emane ? dAdAzrI : e to paNa enI draSTi evI che, tyAM sudhI zuM thAya te ? emAM eno zo doSa bicArAno ? draSTi ja vAMkI che, to vAMkuM ja juene ! e to ApaNane AnaMda thAya ke enI pAse je che e jue che. tethI no laoN - laoN kahyuM che ne ! koI jAtano laoN vagarano laoN che A. tamane potAne jJAna phAve che ke nahIM phAvatuM ? praznakartA : dAdA, eno to vikalpa ja nathI Avato. dAdAzrI : hA, to pachI ApaNe eTaluM ja joI levAnuM. bIjAne jovAnI draSTi ja kyAM che ? enI draSTi vAMkI hoya to mArI joDe ya nathI phAvatuM ne ! ahIM tame teDI lAvo ne, enI draSTi vAMkI hoya to mArI joDe nA phAve. e to jANo cho ne tame, e to mArI joDe phAve e sAcuM !

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pahelI zraddhA ke paheluM vartana ? ApaNo vyavahAra zuddha vyavahAra hoya che. have e vyavahAra pelA loko ahIM khoLavA Ave bahAranA. bahAranA loko to zubha vyavahAra khoLavA Ave. ApaNe tyAM zuddha vyavahAra hoya. ApaNe tyAM to AtmAne AnuSaMgika hoya. 381 praznakartA : samajAya che ke vagara vyavasthA goThave paNa vadhatuM ja jAya che. dAdAzrI : goThavelI vyavasthAmAM zuM vaLe ? ahaMkAra hoya te avyavasthita kare che. praznakartA : nA, paNa dAdA, lokonI zuM apekSA hoya che vyavahAramAM ya ke kaMIka kacaro ocho thayo emanAmAM, kaMIka sudharyA, evuM to dekhAvuM to joIe ja ne ? dAdAzrI : hA. paNa dekhavA mATe e tapAsa kare to, UMDI tapAsa kare to jaDe. Ama zI rIte tapAsa kare ? zI rIte jaDe ? badhAne sonuM jo oLakhatA AvaDatuM hoya to coksIonI zI jarUra ? ane coksIneya AvaDo kALo patharo joIe. 'mahArAja, tame coksI haiDA thavAnA tyAM sudhI patharo joIze tamAre ? tyAre kahe, 'e patharAMnI jarUra paDe. patharAM vagara to amAruM TesTa Ave nahIM !' ApaNe kahIe, patharAne huM sonuM ghaNuM to mAre cAlene ?" tyAre kahe, 'nA cAle.' e pachI anubhavanI samajaNa joIene ! A to samajaNeya mArI ja, anubhavanI !' eTale AmAM zI rIte parIkSA kare mANasa ? loko evuM kahe che ke A dAdAne ame svIkArIe chIe. dAdA cokkasa che, paNa tamArA badhAmAM to AmAM kazo bhalIvAra nathI. vAto karo eTaluM ja.' pAchAM lokone kahe cheya kharAM, dAdAne ame svIkArIe. A ene zuM khabara paDe ke A badhA kaye raste che ? mahIM joyA karavAthI ja zuddhikaraNa ! ApaNAM mahAtmAone, paheluM mana zuddha thAya tyAre vANI zuddha thAya. vANI zuddha thAya tyAre vartana zuddha thAya. paNa paheluM mana zuddha thavuM joIe. mana zuddha jeTalA aMze thayuM eTalA aMze vANI zuddha thAya. jeTalA aMze AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) vANI zuddha thaI eTalA aMze vartana zuddha thaze. vartana chellAmAM chelluM thAya. vartananI bahu kiMmata nathI. bhagavAne vartananI kiMmata bahu gaNI nathI. jagate vartananI kiMmata gaNI che. vartana to ghI tAvyA pachI, garama karyA pachI Ave ! je TADhuM thayeluM ghI hoya te DhaLI na jAya, mATe kaMI vartanamAM AvyuM nathI evuM nA kahevAya. ene garama kare eTale pAchuM evuM thAya. akrama vijJAnInuM kahevuM e ja che ke jagata je AkhuM mAne che, tenAthI A juduM kare che. jagata AkhuM Ane mAne che, vartanane. tAre manamAM game te haze paNa vartanamAM to bahu sAruM che ne e akrama jJAnI nA pADe che ke mUA, jokhama to AmAM che. tAruM vartana game teTaluM sAruM hoya paNa mana tAruM bagaDeluM che e AvatA bhavano hisAba che ane A vartanano tane A bhavamAM jaza maLI jaze paNa Avato bhava bagaDyone ? tyAre jagatane AvatA bhavanI nathI paDelI. atyAre sAruM-sAruM dekhAya. kAraNa ke draSTi nathI ene, samyak draSTi nathI ene, ene mithyAdraSTi che. 382 mahAtmAnuM vartana khoLavA jAya to kazo dahADo nA vaLe. vartana to keTalA kALe hAthamAM Ave evuM che. ane A kALa evo nathI. A slipiMga kALa che, lapasaNo kALa che. AmAM ApaNe have dahADo vaLe nahIM. enA karatAM mela pULo. vartanane bAjue mUkI manozuddhi thavA do. AtmA zuddha thaI gayo. pahelI mananI zuddhi thayA ja kare niraMtara. AtmA zuddha thayo eTale manamAM jeTaluM DiscArja thAya ene joyA karIe, eTaluM zuddha thayuM mana. jagatanuM mana azuddha thayA kare che. jeTaluM DiscArja thAya chene, temAM pote tanmayAkAra thaI jAya. kaheze, "mane vicAra Avyo, mane vicAra Avyo !' alyA, kharAba vicAra Avyo te ya ? tyAre kahe, 'hA, mane ja kharAba vicAra Ave che.' alyA, tane kharAba zI rIte Ave ? tArI icchA nathI to tane vicAra zI rIte Ave ? tArI jAtano e mAlika che ? paNa A to bhrAMti che ene ke mane Ave che vicAra. vicAra bIjA kone Ave ? mahIM bIjuM koNa che ? alyA mahIM to bahu che, badhA kauravopAMDavo, kRSNa bhagavAna che, badhuM AkhuM mahAbhArata paDeluM che. //////////

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384 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) [7] riyala puruSArtha AjJA' pALavAthI sAco puruSArtha zarU ! praznakartA : riyala puruSArtha ane rileTiva puruSArtha, e bemAM pharaka batAvone ! dAdAzrI : riyala puruSArthamAM karavAnI vastu nathI hotI. bemAM pharaka e che ke riyala puruSArtha eTale 'jovAnuM ne jANavAnuM ane rileTiva puruSArtha eTale zuM ? bhAva karavAnA. aisA hama kareMge. be jAtanA puruSArtha. eka prArabdhamAMthI utpanna thato puruSArtha. prArabdhamAMthI bIja paDe, tenAthI utpanna thato puruSArtha ane eka che te puruSa thayA pachIno puruSArtha. te meM tamane jJAna ApyuM. te prakRtithI tame chUTA paDyA. 'huM zuddhAtmA' eTale puruSa che ane tyAra pachI puruSArtha che kharo, riyala puruSArtha A. ane pelo puruSArtha to kharo ja, paNa bhrAMtino puruSArtha. khoTo nA kahevAya, paNa te A loko je mAne che e puruSArtha nathI. A loko mAne che temAM koI mANasa sAco nathI, puruSArthanI bAbatamAM. praznakartA : pachI pelo riyala puruSArtha, kharo puruSArtha je dAdA karI Ape che e samajAvone ! dAdAzrI : kharo puruSArtha to, tame je caMdubhAI hatA ne puruSArtha karatA hatAne, e brAMtino puruSArtha hato. paNa jyAre 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' ne e puruSArtha karo pachI, dAdAnI pAMca AjJAmAM raho e riyala puruSArtha. puruSa thaIne puruSArtha karyo kahevAya. puruSa thaIne puruSArtha kare e sAco puruSArtha. eTale tame che to pAMca AjJAmAM raho te. praznakartA : to pachI AmAM bIjA koI puruSArthane zuM avakAza ? dAdAzrI : puruSArtha to A mArI AjJA pALo e ja, bIjo koI puruSArtha karavAno hoya ja nahIMne ! bIjuM vyavasthita. e AzAo badhI puruSane mATe ja che, prakRti mATe nathI. praznakartA : jJAnabIja je ropAyuM e ja prakAza che, e ja jyoti che ? dAdAzrI : e ja ! paNa bIjarUpe. have e dhIme dhIme pUnama thaze. pudgala ane puruSa be judA paDyA tyArathI puruSArtha sAco zarU thAya. jyAM puruSArtha cAlu thayo, te bIjanI pUnama karaze. hA ! A AjJA pALI eTale thAya. bIjuM kazuM karavAnuM ja nathI. karavAnuM kazuM nahIM, phakta AjJA pALavAnI. praznakartA: dAdA, puruSa thayA pachInAM puruSArthanuM varNana to karo thoDuM. vyavahAramAM kevI rIte karato hoya ? dAdAzrI : vyavahAramAM ja chene badhuM A, A ApaNA mahAtmAo badhA rahe ja che ne ! pAMca AjJAmAM rahe che ne ! pAMca AjJA e ja dAdA, e ja riyala puruSArtha. puruSArtha H AjJArUpI, svabhAvika ! pAMca AjJA pALavI, enuM nAma puruSArtha ane pAMca AjJAnA pariNAme zuM thAya che ? jJAtA-draSTA padamAM rahevAya che. ane amane koI pUche ke kharA puruSArthanuM nAma zuM ? tyAre ame kahIe, jJAtA-draSya rahevuM te ! te A pAMca AjJA, jJAtA-draSTA ja zIkhavADe chene ? rileTiva ne

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386 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) riyala puruSArtha 385 riyala, e jotAM che te A AgaLa-pAchaLano je vicAra Avato hoya to vyavasthita kahIne baMdha kara. jotI vakhate AgaLano vicAra ene herAna kare, to ApaNe 'vyavasthita' kahIe eTale baMdha thaI gayuM. eTale pAchuM jovAnuM cAlu rahe ApaNuM. te vakhate koI phAIla pajavatI hoya to samabhAve nikAla karIne paNa te cAlu rahyuM ApaNuM. Ama AjJA jJAtA-draSTA padamAM rAkhe che. amArI AjJAmAM raho e puruSArtha. puruSa thayA pachI puruSArtha zo bIjo ? ane AjJAthI phaLa AveluM hoya, eTale pote sahaja svabhAve vagara AjJAe rahI zake, te ya puruSArtha kahevAya. moTo puruSArtha kahevAya. A AjJAthI puruSArtha ane pelo svAbhAvika puruSArtha ! praznakartA : svAbhAvika puruSArthamAM AvI gayA, pachI pelo puruSArtha karavAnI kaMI jarUra kharI ? dAdAzrI : pachI jarUra nahIMne ! peluM to enI meLe chUTI jAya ! praznakartA : jJAnI jyAre maLe tyAre svAbhAvika ja puruSArtha utpanna thato hoyane? dAdAzrI : hA, svAbhAvika utpanna thAyane ! paheluM AjJArUpI puruSArtha, emAMthI pachI svAbhAvika puruSArtha utpanna thAya. jJAtA-draSTA e ja kharo puruSArtha ! praznakartA : jeTalo vakhata jJAtA-draSTA rahIe e puruSArtha ? dAdAzrI : hA. agara to bIjAmAM zuddhAtmA juo, nahIM to mArI AjJA pALo toya puruSArtha. amArI pAMca AjJA je chene, e pALo te ghaDIe puruSArtha hoya ja. eTale pAMca AjJAmAM rahene, e zuddha upayoga ja che. nahIM to prakRtine nIhALavI. hamaNe A caMdubhAI vAIpha joDe kacakaca karatAM hoya te ghaDIe 'pote' caMdubhAIne jue, ke "kahevuM paDe caMdubhAI, hatAM evA ne evAM ja cho tame !!' evuM badhuM jue e puruSArtha kahevAya. praznakartA : paNa pachI koIke e bAbatamAM jAgRti mATe puruSArtha karavo joIe ke khAlI jJAtA ja rahevAnuM ? dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTA rahevuM e ja kharo puruSArtha. potAno jJAyaka je svabhAva che te svabhAvamAM ja rahevuM e ja puruSArtha ane jJAtA-draSTA rahyA e cAritra kahevAya, samyak cAritra kahevAya. jJAta-ajJAta bhede te riyala puruSArtha ! jJAna-ajJAna bhinna bhedatI vakhate puruSArtha hoya che ane cAritramAM AvI gayA pachI puruSArtha nA hoya. cAritra e svabhAva kahevAya. svabhAvamAM mahenata zuM ? cAritramAM, svabhAvamAM lAvavA mATe puruSArtha karavAno, jJAna ane ajJAna bene judAM pADIne. e bhedavijJAnI karI zake. bIjA koI ene karI zake nahIMne ! ane tame bhedavijJAnanA raste cAlyA eTale tame bIjAne bhedavijJAna nA karAvI zako paNa tamAruM potAnuM bhedavijJAna rAkhI zako, A bhAga AtmAno ne A bhAga bIjo, evuM samajI zako. ane kharekhara bhedavijJAnI hoya te bIjAne hala karAvI Ape. eTale AmAM peluM vyavahAra cAritra e puruSArtha nahIM, paNa jJAnaajJAna bhinnabhede, bhedavijJAnathI kare e badho puruSArtha. jyAM AgaLa jJAnakriyA ke darzanakriyA che, tyAM puruSArtha che. emAM AtmAmAM bIjI koI kriyA hotI nathI. darzanakriyA kema nAma ApeluM ke A lokone samajaNa pADavA mATe kriyA zabda mUkeluM che. ene kriyA ja nA hoyane kazuM. jyAM kriyA hoya, tyAM mikenikala ane mikenikala tyAM mokSa hoya nahIM. praznakartA : jJAna ane ajJAnano bheda kare e puruSArtha ? dAdAzrI : e ja puruSArtha. tame zuddhAtmAmAM raho, zukladhyAnamAM te puruSArtha. tame zuddhAtmAmAM cho to ko'ka tamane apamAna karato hoya tyAre to tamane ema lAge che ke A AvuM karI rahyo che. e karI rahyo che evuM mAno cho, e tamArI samajaNamAM bhUla che. eya zuddhAtmA che ane e kare che e to badhuM udayakarmanA AdhIna kare che, e pote karato nathI. e

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388 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : koI kaheze, 'tame UMdhe raste gayA'. paNa UMdho to UMdho paNa nizcaya to joIene ? A to nA UMdho pakaDAya ne nA chato pakaDAya. UMdhe gayA hoya to chato dekhADe koI. UMdhe ja gayo nA hoya, to chato koNa dekhADe ? riyala puruSArtha 387 bicAro udayakarmane AdhIna che. bhamaraDo phare che ane sahu sahunA udayakarmo sAmasAmI vyavahAra patAvI de. ApaNe joyA karavAnuM ke A be pudgalo zuM laTTabAjI kare che. Ane je jue che e puruSArtha che. eTale tame jJAtAdraSTA rahyA eTale chelle je jJAna-ajJAna bhinna bhedAyA pachI juduM rahe che, e potAno svabhAva. pachI svabhAvamAM AvI gayo. svabhAva eTale ja A siddhakSetramAM je svabhAva che, teno te svabhAva utpanna thAya che. ema karatAM karatAM niveDo Avaze. niveDo AvI rIte ja Ave ! puruSArtha karAve koNa ? ApaNA puruSArtha ane parAkrama UbhA thayelA che. have A puruSArthano guNa AtmAmAM nathI, paNa je prajJA nAmanI zakti chene, te eno dharma ja che A. eTale tame nakkI karo ke mAre A puruSArthamAM rahevuM che, to avazya evuM rahe. tema chatAMya ahIM AgaLa kaMI puruSArthane ADe Ave tyAre 'vyavasthita' nAma devuM. nizcaya rUpI puruSArtha ! praznakartA : dAdA, evA evA aMtarAya karma hoya, je ApaNane jJAnamAM ke jAgRtimAM pAchaLa pADI de ? dAdAzrI : je gaNo te. aMtarAya karma ke ApaNA puruSArthanI kacAza. A puruSArtha to meM tamane khullo karI Apyo che. zuddhAtmA banAvyA tyArathI puruSArtha khullo che. eTale ApaNA puruSArthanI ja kacAza. - puruSArtha e ApaNe nakkI karavo joIe. nizcaya karIe eTale e thaI ja jAya enI meLe. nizcaya karavo joIe. tame nizcaya karyo nathI ke abhedabhAve rahevuM che. e haju nizcaya kAco eTale jarA kAcuM thayA kare che. te nizcaya pAko karI nAkho to sarasa thayA kare. e to pachI nizcaya karyo eTale cAlavA mAMDe. ahIMthI eraporTa javuM che e nizcaya nA hoya, to zuM thAya ? praznakartA : nA javAya. praznakartA : eTale ema kaheto hato ke pahelo nizcaya thaI jAya ke mAre AjJA pALavI che. dAdAzrI : to badhuM pALI zakAya. nizcaya badhuM ja kAma kare. game tevI kharAba vastumAMya nizcaya kAma karI nAkhe. nizcaya eTale mAre relve lAIna nAkhavI che eTale nAMkhavA ja mAMDe, bIjI kazI bhAMjagaDamAM nA paDe. jyAM sudhI nizcaya nathI thayo, tyAM sudhI e che te guMcAyA kare. plAniMga citare ne plAniMga pherave ane emAM kazuM bhalIvAra nA Ave. kharI rIte to tame puruSArthamAM ja hova cho. kAraNa ke AtmA prApta thayA pachI puruSArtha ane parAkrama UbhAM thAya. paNa parAkrama nA thatuM hoya, to puruSArtha kare. parAkrama eTale jema A kUtaruM chene, te Akho dahADo dhULa UDI hoyane, te eka ja phero Ama Ama karI khaMkherI nAkhe to badhI dhULa UDI jAya, sApha thaI jAya. enuM nAma parAkrama kahevAya. evuM teM joyeluM nahIM, A kUtaruM zuM kare che ? praznakartA: AkhuM enuM zarIra cokhkhuM karI nAkhe Ama. dAdAzrI: e kayA prophesare zIkhavADyuM haze ? prophesaranA zIkhavADyA vagara AvaDI jAya ? paNa Ama kevA cokhkhA thaI jAya ! kazuM eka jarAya paNa DAgha nathI raheto ene ! tame puruSa thayA eTale puruSa zakti puruSArtha sahita hoya, sva-parAkrama sahita hoya. ohoho ! ame sva-parAkramathI AkhI duniyAmAM pharIe chIe, eka kalAkamAM ! meM tamane puruSa banAvyA pachI, tame zuddhAtmA thayA pachI, tamArI zaktio bahu ja vadhavA mAMDe che. paNa jo AmAM lakSa rAkhIne ane amArA TacamAM raho to bahu helpa kare.

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riyala puruSArtha 389 390 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) hoyane, tenI mahIM tanmayAkAra vRtti rahe, eTale e bAjunI tIvratA hovI joIe. tIvratA eTale potAno jabarajasta puruSArtha hovo joIe. praznakartA : dAdA pAse AvyA pachI khAtrI thaI gaI ke have A dehadhArI paramAtmA che, eTale pachI jo tIvra puruSArtha jo eno hoya... dAdAzrI : basa, to bahu thaI gayuM. chUTI gayo e, bIjo vAMdho nathI. nukasAnakAraka nathI ane saMsAra cAle ene mATe oLaMbo Apyo. kAraNa ke tyAM sudhI peluM saMsAra calAvavAnI ciMtA rahetI'tI. paNa A to oLaMbo Apyo ke eya vyavasthita calAvI leze. badhA oLaMbA sAthe ApyuM che. te koI jAtanI varIjha rAkhyA sivAya badhuM ApyuM ane kramika mArgamAM to ghara calAvavAnI pachI upAdhi, dhaMdho calAvavAnI upAdhi, bhaviSyanI ciMtA pAchI. A to bhaviSyanI ciMtA-biMtA kazuMya nahIM. bhUtakALa gona, bhaviSyakALa vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM che eTale ApaNe vartamAnamAM niraMtara rahIe. Avo tAla bese nahIM. maphatamAM, vagara mahenate mokSa ! svapuruSArtha sadAya sakriya ! praznakartA : aMtaHkaraNa to tamAruM evuM badhuM oTomeTika ja ghaDAI gayeluM ? dAdAzrI : nA, ghaDAI gayeluM nahIM, badhuM khalAsa thaI gayeluM, ekjhosTa thaI gayeluM mana. emAM nA rahe ane AtmAmAM rahe eTale vikharAI jAya jhapATe. praznakartA : pachI puruSArtha kazo ja nA rahyo ? dAdAzrI : potAno puruSArtha to niraMtara hoyane ! praznakartA : paNa A badhuM aMtaHkaraNa AkhuM maMda paDI gayuM eTale tyAM kazuM puruSArtha rahyo ja nahIMne ? dAdAzrI : puruSArtha potAno ja cAlu rahe. jyAM sudhI sUkSmatara ane sukSmatama bhUlo hoya tyAM sudhI cAlu rahe, nahIM to ya kevaLajJAna thatAM sudhI puruSArtha cAlu rahe. puruSa thayA pachI puruSArtha ja hoya ! mokSamArga eTale so yatuM sonuM ! puruSArtha to, puruSa thayA vagara puruSArtha thAya nahIM. jyAM jAgRta thayo, eTale potAnI bhUlo dekhAvA mAMDI, niSpakSapAtapaNe dekhAvA mAMDyuM. caMdubhAIno ekeeka doSa samajatA thAya tyAre niSpakSapAtapaNuM thayuM. tyAre jajamenTa pAvara Ave, tyAra pachI puruSArtha kharo maMDAya. ApaNAM vANI, vartana ne vinayamAM phera thAya che ke kema, e paNa ApaNe sTaDI karatAM rahevuM joIe. thoDI thoDI vANI pharatI jAya che ke nahIM ? dAdAnAM jevuM thavuM ja paDazene ? to ja mokSe javAze. mokSamAM to eka ja jAtanI kvoliTIne ? soe so Taca pUrA ne ? emAM kaMI daza Taca cAle kaMI ? eTale Akho zuddhikaraNano mArga che A. mokSe javAnI kaMIka bhAvanA hoya, je kaMIka prApta karavAnI bhAvanA kAma kADhI lo dAdAnI hAjarImAM... praznakartA : pahelAM mane potAnI bhUlo jevuM dekhAtuM na hatuM. have DhagalAbaMdha dekhAya che. goDAunonA goDAuno bharyA che evuM lAge che. dAdAzrI : evuM ! mAla goDAuno bharelAM chene ! eno vAMdho nahIM. dAdAnI pAse AvIe chIe ne jyAM sudhI mAthe dAdA che, tyAM sudhI koI jAtano vAMdho nahIM rAkhavAno. phakta ApaNA manamAM ema ke A chUTe to sAruM, chUTe to sAruM, mAla badho khAlI thAya to sAruM evI bhAvanA karo ! dAdA che tyAM sudhI badhuM thaI zake, pachI puruSArtha bahu karavo paDaze. emanI gerahAjarImAM bahu puruSArtha karavo paDe. e hoya tyAM sudhI ApaNe emanI vidhio karIe, satsaMga karIe to A badho mAla dhULadhANI karI nAkhe. dAdAne jovAthI ja keTalAM doSo UDI jAya ! khAlI darzana kare ne tenI sAthe ja keTalAMya doSo UDI jAya !

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riyala puruSArtha praznakartA : paNa dAdA, tamAre badhAM mahAtmAonuM badhuM barAbara karIne javAnuM. ema kaMI amane rastAmAM rajhaLatA mUkIne jAva to nA cAlene ? 391 dAdAzrI : tamAre badhAMe nakkI karavAnuM ke badhAM eka sTezana para AvIne bese tyAre 'jAva dAdA' ema kahevuM. Ama badhAM rajhaLatAM hoya tyAM sudhI badhAMne bUmo pADIne kahI devuM, AvI jAva, ahIM AgaLa ! badhAM bhegAM AvI jAva' ema kahIe. ame joIe ke jyAM jyAM jeNe puruSArtha sAcA dilathI mAMDyo che, tenA para amArI avazya kRpA varase ja. tame AgaLa pagalAM mAMDyA che ane sAcA dilathI puruSArtha mAMDyo che eTale amArI kRpA Utare ja. jarA narama paDI jAya to tyAMthI khasIne bIjI jagyAe jaIe. ame kyAM besI rahIe ? e narama paDI jAya to ame kyAM besI rahIe ? praznakartA : narama paDe to ene tamAre UMco karavo joIene ? dAdAzrI : e karI joIe paNa pAcho narama paDI jAya eTale ame khasI jaIe. bIjAM cAlatAM hoya tenuM jovAnuM ne ! narama paDAya ja kema ? potAnI sthiti narama paDavI nA joIe. sAmI aDacaNa AvI hoya to te judI vAta che, paNa potAne to sTroMga ja rahevuM joIe. jJAnI pAchaLa pharyA karIe chIe, te kaMI niveDo to Avazene ? dAdAto aMtima saMdezo, mahAtmAone... praznakartA : tame pelo dAkhalo bahu phAIna Apyo. A pelI bilADI hoyane e baccAMne Ama moDhAmAM laIne jAya ane vAMdarIne vAMdarInA baccAM coMTI paDe. dAdAzrI : coMTI paDe, choDe nahIM. kAraNa ke vAMdarI paMdara phUTa kUde, baccuM tarata ja AMkha mIMcIne coMTI rahyuM hoya. e baccuM jANe ke 'tamArI javAbadArI nahIM bA, mArI ja javAbadArI', evuM vaLage. vAMdarI paDI jAya AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) toya ene kazuM thAya nahIM, evuM vaLage. evuM zIkhI levAnuM. pakaDAze ? praznakartA : evI ja rIte pakaDavAnuM che dAdAne. dAdAzrI : pakaDIza tyAre ne haju ? praznakartA : pakaDelA ja che dAdAne. 392 dAdAzrI : pakaDyA che ? tame hau pakaDyA chene dAdAne ?! tamAre mane vaLagI paDavAnuM, mAre tamane vaLagavAnuM nahIM. A bilADInAM baccAM moMDhAmAM ghAlIne laI javA paDe. ane vAMdarIne ? baccAM 'mA'ne choDe nahIM pachI. e Ama kUdIne to peluM baccuM pelI bAju kUde nahIM, evuM pakaDI rAkheluM hoya ! tame badhA vAMdarInA baccAnI peThe amane vaLagI rahejo. //////////

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[8] zukladhyAta akrama mArge zukla dhyAta ! tamane ema pUchavAmAM Ave, ke kharekhara tame caMdubhAI cho ke tame zuddhAtmA cho ? to tame zuM kaho praznakartA : Ama to zuddhAtmA chIe, paNa vyavahAranI aMdara caMdubhAI. dAdAzrI : hA, riyalI tame zuddhAtmA chone ? praznakartA : hA, cokkasa. dAdAzrI : to tame kharekhara zuddhAtmA cho eTale tamArA lakSamAM zuM rahe ? tamArA dhyAnamAM zuM rahe ? 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM dhyAnamAM rahe che ke nathI rahetuM ? praznakartA : hA, e ja dhyAnamAM rahe, barAbara. dAdAzrI : e tamArA dhyAnamAM rahe che e zukladhyAna che. have zukladhyAna tamane UbhuM thayuM. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e dhyAna jene rahe, tene bhagavAne kahyuM ke zudhyAna kahevAya. kAraNa ke 'zuddhAtmA chuM' e dhyAna cUkAya nahIM, bhUlI nA javAya, e lakSamAM ja rahyA kare ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM. 394 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : e bhUlavA mAgIe to ya nathI bhUlAtuM. dAdAzrI : nA bhUlAya. e to Ama saMsAra vyavahAramAM ya 'huM caMdulAla chuM' evuM jANatAM hoyane, te ghaNAMya loko potAnuM e bhUlavA mAMge paNa e bhUlAya ? e to rItasara jJAnInA AdhAre enA tAra kapAI javA joIe. sUkSma tAra, zraddhAnA tAro beThelAM hoya che. e tAra tUTI javA joIe. UMdhI zraddhA, roMga bilipho tUTe ane rAITa bilipha bese to kAma lAge. rAITa biliphane samyak darzana kahyuM ane UMdhI bilIphane mithyAtva kahyuM. eTale A dehAdhyAsa kone kahevAya ke 'huM caMdulAla chuM', 'A meM karyuM', 'A mAruM' e badhuM dehAdhyAsa. 'huM A dharama bahu jANuM chuM', 'zAstronAM zAstrono badho jANakAra chuM", 'zAstranuM jJAna mane moDhe che.', 'zrutajJAna moDhe che' e badhuM dehAdhyAsa. badhA zAstro moDhe hoya to paNa tene dehAdhyAsa bhagavAne kahyuM. kAraNa ke 'huM caMdulAla chuM' e adhyAsa tUTyo nathI. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' eTale thayuM, e badho ukela AvI gayo. zuddhAtmAtA dhyAtatI zI rIta ? praznakartA H zuddhAtmAnuM dhyAna kevI rIte karavAnuM ? dAdAzrI : have tamAre dhyAna karavAnuM kazuM rahyuM nathI. dhyAna kyAre karavAnuM hoya ke dhyeya prApta karavAno hoya tyAre. dhyeya nakkI kare, dhyAtA pote thAya ane pachI dhyeya ne dhyAtAnuM anusaMdhAna dhyAnathI thAya. dareka mANasa potAno dhyeya nakkI karene ke mAre svarUpa prApta karavuM che, to tamAruM svarUpa zuddhAtmA che ane tame caMdubhAI cho eTale tame dhyAtA thayA ne zuddhAtmA e dhyeya che ane e beno sAMdho maLe tyAre dhyAna kahevAya. e beno ekatAra thAya, te ekatAne dhyAna kahe che. have e dhyAnathI pote zuddhAtmA thaI jAya. have e kramika mArgano rasto che. dhyAtA, dhyeya ne dhyAnano ! ane A akrama mArgamAM to tame pote dhyeya svarUpa ja thaI gayAne ! potAne zuddhAtmAnuM lakSa beThuM ke 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM', eTale pachI dhyAna karavAnuM ene rahyuM nahIM have !!

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zukladhyAna 395 396 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) zukladhyAna to A kALamAM kramika mArge utpanna thAya tevuM che ja nahIM. A to A jJAna ApIe chIene tethI utpanna thAya che. zukladhyAna ne AtmadhyAna eka ja gaNAya che. have A to kamplITa AtmAnuM dhyAna thayuM, enuM nAma zukladhyAna.. AtmAtA svarUpano khyAla rAkhavo kaI rIte ? praznakartA : dAdA, AtmAnuM svarUpa kevuM ? enuM dhyAna karavuM hoya, eno khyAla rAkhavo hoya ApaNe, to te kevI rIte rAkhavo ? dAdAzrI caMdubhAIne oLakho 'tame ? praznakartA : hA. dAdAzrI : te caMdubhAI tamane dekhAya, AMkho mIMco eTale ? praznakartA : hA. toya khyAla Ave. dAdAzrI : e caMdubhAIne jue tema AtmAnI najIka Ave che. pachI caMdubhAInA manane jue, "caMdubhAInI vANIne jue eTale AtmA vadhAre najIka Ave. A badhuM jovAnuM. manamAM je vicAra AvyA te badhA potAne khabara paDe ke AvuM Ave che, AvuM Ave che. manamAM vicAra Ave te jue, vANInA zabdo badhA jue ane caMdubhAI zuM karatA hoya te badhuM jue e AtmA. ane AtmAnuM dhyAna to enI meLe ja rahyA kare, karavuM nA paDe. zI rIte rahyA kare te jANo cho ? "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e dhyAnamAM rahevuM, enuM nAma zuddhAtmAnuM dhyAna kahevAya. tame ahIMthI muMbaI javAnuM nakkI karyuM hoya te pachI haratAM-pharatAM, bajAramAM zAka levA gayA hoya, to paNa muMbaI tamAre dhyAnamAM hoya ke nA hoya ? praznakartA: hoya. dAdAzrI : enuM nAma dhyAna kahevAya. AMkho mIMcIne besavuM, enuM nAma dhyAna nA kahevAya. e to ekAgratA kahevAya. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM" e tamane dhyAnamAM rahe che thoDo vakhata ? praznakartA : hA. niraMtara rahe che ! dAdAzrI : e Akho dahADo niraMtara rahe, e zuddhAtmAnuM dhyAna ane pahelAM 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e dhyAnamAM hatuM. nizcayathI zukladhyAta te vyavahArathI dharmadhyAta ! praznakartA : pAMca AjJAmAM niraMtara ame rahIe, eTale zukladhyAnamAM rahIe chIe e vAta sAcI ? dAdAzrI : "huM zuddhAtmA chuM" e dhyAna jene rahyA ja karatuM hoya e zukladhyAna ja che. praznakartA : jJAna lIdhelA mahAtmAne A 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evI avasthA avAranavAra Avene ? dAdAzrI : e avAranavAra Ave evuM nahIM, e dhyAna hoya che ja. eTale tamane nizcayathI zukladhyAna thayuM. vyavahArathI che te tamane A badhAne dharmadhyAna. e zukladhyAna to che, paNa e zukladhyAna sArA pramANamAM rahe eTalA mATe AjJAnuM proTekzana che. A proTekzana Apo to niraMtara raheze. peluM vacce zukladhyAna che, chatAMya AjJAmAM nA raho to e gAphelamAM jatuM rahe ! praznakartA : meleriyAnA tAvamAM zarIra taraphaDatuM hoya, evI sthitimAMya mahIM pratikramaNa jenuM tenuM karyA karIe, te kayuM dhyAna kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : e dharmadhyAna kahevAya. paNa A pratikramaNa karene, to dharmadhyAna ekaluM nA hoya, zukladhyAna sAthe hoya. nizcayathI zukladhyAna ane vyavahArathI dharmadhyAna evI joDI hoya. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e lakSa rahyA kare, 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e dhyAnamAM rahe, e ja zukladhyAna kahevAya che ane peluM pratikramaNa karo, e dharmadhyAna kahevAya. zukladhyAna eTale "huM zuddhAtmA chuM' evuM kaMIka bhAna vahyuM, tyArathI e zukladhyAna kahevAya che. e dharmadhyAnamAM jatuM nathI ke ArtadhyAnamAM nathI

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zukladhyAna 397 398 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) jatuM, raudradhyAnamAM paNa jatuM nathI. have dharmadhyAnamAM keTaluM jAya ke tamane kahyuM hoya ke A pratikramaNa karajo, e dharmadhyAnamAM jAya. have tame AtmA to thaI gayA. aMdaranuM kAma to pUruM thaI gayuM. have bahAranuM kAma A akrama che ne eTale bahAranuM kAma rahyuM che. jJAta pachI tahi Arta-raudradhyAta re ! praznakartA eTale koI vakhata ArtadhyAna thAya che, ne ArtadhyAna je che e pote potAne mApha nathI karato ane aMdara baLe che, e ArtadhyAna thayuMne ? dAdAzrI : ArtadhyAna thAya to nahIM. ApaNuM jJAna ApyA pachI ArtadhyAna thatuM ja nathI ane je ene potAne lAge che ke A ArtadhyAna che, e ArtadhyAna nathI paNa e saphokezana che. ArtadhyAnamAM 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e Disijhana hovuM joIe. have ApaNe "huM caMdubhAI nathI" evuM Disijhana AvI gayuM che. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM" e Disijhana AvyA pachI AtmadhyAna ja hoya. ArtadhyAna-raudradhyAna hoI zake nahIM. kAraNa ke pote AtmA thayo eTale pote AtmadhyAnamAM hoya. ArtadhyAna thAya kyAre ke pote caMdulAla thAya to ! have ene saphIkezana thAya, gUMgaLAmaNa thAya eTale kaMIka thAya che. evuM lAge eTale e jANe ke pahelAnuM ArtadhyAna che. e pote potAnA du:khamAM gUMcAvuM, enuM nAma ArtadhyAna ane pArakAnA mATe du:kha UbhuM karavuM, bIjAno doSa jovo e raudradhyAna. e beu baMdha hoya to ja mokSa thAya. e to atyAre AcAryone tame pUcho ke sAheba, raudradhyAna ne ArtadhyAna nathI thatuM to ?! tyAre kahe, to mokSa ja thaI javAno. e loko ya samaje sArI rIte. tyAre kahIe, dharmadhyAna naDaze nahIM ? tyAre kahe, "nA, dharmadhyAne ne zukladhyAna naDe nahIM !" ahaMkAra khalAsa thAya tyAre ja zukladhyAna kahevAya ! tamAre ahaMkAra ja khalAsa thaI gayo ane tethI zukladhyAna kahevAyane ! tyAre e chello avatAra ! praznakartA : dharmadhyAnathI zuM thAya ? puNya baMdhAya ? dAdAzrI : dharmadhyAna be prakAranAM. ahaMkAre kareluM dharmadhyAna, tenAthI bhautika sukho maLe. ane mokSanA mArge jatAM bIjA saMjogoya maLI Ave, satsaMga maLI Ave e dharmadhyAnanuM phaLa, paNa ahaMkAre karIne. ane ApaNe je dharmadhyAna kahIe chIe, e to nirahaMkArI dhyAna che. nirahaMkArI dharmadhyAna eka avatArI banAve. eka ja avatAra bAkI rahe, pachI mokSa thAya. ahIMthI sIdho mokSe na jAya. kAraNa ke dharmadhyAna che tyAM sudhI mokSa thAya nahIM. ekaluM zukladhyAna thAya tyAre mokSa thAya. A to zukladhyAna ne dharmadhyAna bane che. kAraNa ke ame je AjJA ApI che pAMca, e AjJA e ja dharmadhyAna che ane e dharmadhyAna hoya tyAM sudhI mokSe nA jAya. paNa eka avatAra thayA pachI mokSe jAya. jJAtI e ja mAro AtmA ! praznakartA : dAdAnAM vicAra karIe, 'dAdA, dAdA' karIe e kayuM dhyAna kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : 'dAdA, dAdA' karIe, e to potAnuM AtmadhyAna kahevAya. pote potAnuM dhyAna kahevAya. jJAnI puruSa e ja potAno AtmA che evuM kRpALudeve kahyuM chene ?! eTale jJAnI puruSanuM dhyAna karIe, te potAnA AtmAnuM dhyAna karyA barAbara che. adhyAtmanI cAra cokaDIo ! bhagavAne kahyuM ke cAra gati, cAra dhyAna, cAra upayoga. have traNa mukhya vastu. cAra dhyAna - raudradhyAna, ArtadhyAna, dharmadhyAna ne zakladhyAna, cAra gati - narkagati, tiryaMcagati, manuSyagati ne devagati. have cAra upayoga - azuddha upayoga, azubha upayoga, zubha upayoga ane zuddha upayoga. A traNe eka ja vastu che badhI. phakta peluM je che zukladhyAna,

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zukladhyAna 399 4% AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) e ekaluM juduM che. zuddha upayoga ne zukladhyAna e mokSanuM kAraNa che. dharmadhyAna hoya, te manuSyagati ane devagatinuM kAraNa che. raudradhyAna hoya to narkagatinuM kAraNa che ane ArtadhyAna e tiryaMcagatinuM kAraNa che. have A dhyAna je che, e kayA dhyAnanuM upAdeya che. to kaheze, zukladhyAnanuM upAdeya che. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e lakSa beThuM e upAdeya, e zukladhyAna kahevAya. lakSa beThuM te. 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' e lakSa utarI gayuM. peluM lakSa beThuM. vyavahAra calAvavA pUratuM, ApaNe vyavahArathI 'huM caMdubhAI chuM' ema kahevuM paDe. dukAnamAMthI bhAgIdArI kADhI nAkhI hoya paNa e kaheze ke, tamAruM nAma rahevA de tyAre ApaNe nA samajIe ke bhaI bhAgIdArI kADhI nAkhI, paNa nAma khAlI vyavahAra mATe rAkhyuM che. inkamaTekSavALo Ave che tyAre 'hA' pADI chene pAchI ke hA, amAruM che. nA kahevuM paDe ? ene ema kahevAya ke ame kADhI lIdhuM che ? evuM A to vyavahAramAM kahevuM paDe ke huM caMdubhAI chuM. paNa ArtadhyAna ne raudradhyAna jene gayAM ane jene zukladhyAna che, eno mokSa eka-be avatAramAM thavAno che. kazAkamAM che te adhyavasanamAM pesI gayo hoya paNa A aTakaNa che evuM khabara paDene to e dharmadhyAna kahevAya. A aTakaNa che evI khabara paDe e dharmadhyAna. ane zukladhyAna to che ja joDe. ArtadhyAna eTale mahIM varIjha thaI jAya, ciMtA thaI jAya. raudradhyAna to mahIM pAra vagaranI baLatarA ja kare. e be jene nathI, tene mokSa vahelo-moDo eka-be avatAramAM thaI ja javAno che. ArtadhyAna ne raudradhyAna, A be nathI e ja jovAnuM che, bIjuM zuM ? akramathI saraLa prApya mokSa ! A akrama jJAna pAmyA pachI eka ke be bhavamAM Ukela Ave tema che. have bhava rahevo ke nA rahevo e dhyAna upara AdhAra rAkhe che. niraMtara zukladhyAna ekaluM ja rahetuM hoya to bIjo bhava thAya ja nahIM. paNa akrama mArgamAM zukladhyAna ne dharmadhyAna be thAya che. aMdara zukladhyAna thAya che ne bahAra dharmadhyAna thAya che. dharmadhyAna zAthI thAya che ? dAdAnA kahyA pramANe AjJA pALavAnI rahe che tenAthI. AjJA pALavI e zukladhyAnanuM kAma nahIM, e dharmadhyAnanuM kAma che. eTale dharmadhyAnane laIne eka-be avatAra pUratuM cArja thAya che. ane Aje tamAma zAstro ekI sAthe kahe che ke A kALamAM koI paNa mANasane zukladhyAna thAya nahIM ane vAteya sAcI che, khoTI nathI. A to akrama vijJAna che. bAkI e kramika mArge nA thAya. jo zukladhyAna thAya to zudhyAna e mokSanuM kAraNa che. ekAvatArI thAya. sIdho mokSe ahIMthI jaI zake nahIM. koI mANasa eka avatArI, pachI jarA kAco hoya ne bhego nA thaI zakato hoya, to be avatAra thAya, traNa avatAra thAya, pAMca avatAra thAya, paNa paMdara avatArathI vadhAre nA thAya. ane amane amatho aDI gayo haze, teya amuka hadamAM AvI jAya che. bIjA badhAMne to hada ja nathI, paNa A hadamAM AvI gayo ane jJAna laI gayo hoya, pAMca AjJA pALato hoya tenI vAta to judI, paMdaramAM AvI gayo che ! enuM nAma zukla dhyAta ! zukladhyAna eTale zuM ke potAnA nija svarUpanuM ja bhAna thavuM ane jANavuM. sAmAmAM zuddhAtmA jovo. e corI karato hoya to paNa ApaNe enA AtmAne zuddha ja joIe. game te karato hoya, e badhuM vyavasthitane tAbe che paNa AtmAnuM kArya nathI A. eTale ApaNe zuddha ja joIe. zuddha jovuM ane zuddhano kaMIka anubhava thavo e zukladhyAna. zukladhyAna eTale jema che tema jagata jovuM ane samabhAve nikAla jene karavo che, tene zukladhyAna sArI rIte rahe, zukladhyAna eTale potAnA svarUpanI ramaNatA sivAya bIjuM koI paNa dhyAna nahIM, pote potAnA dhyAnamAM hoya e zukladhyAna, potAnuM svarUpa potAnA dhyAnamAM rahe che e zukladhyAna che ane zukladhyAna e pratyakSa mokSanuM kAraNa che. AtmAnuM spaSTa-aspaSTa vedata ! zukladhyAnanA cAra pAyA. emAM A pahelo pAyo che. eTale aspaSTa vedana thAya. vastu che e nakkI thaI gaI. vastu che evuM bhAna thayuM ApaNane, paNa enuM spaSTa vedana nA thAya. 'zuddhAtmA chuM' lakSa beThuM paNa aspaSTa vedana e pahelo pAyo, bIjo pAyo spaSTa vedana.

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402 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) zukladhyAna 401 praznakartA : niraMtara lakSa emAM rahetuM haze ? dAdAzrI : nA, lakSa rAkhavAnuM nahIM. spaSTa vedana kyAre thAya ? bahAra darzanamAM badhuM tamane AvI gayuM che, paNa rUpakamAM nathI AvyuM ane rUpakamAM Ave tyAre spaSTa vedana thAya. amuka bhAga rUpakamAM AvI gayo, paNa A dhaMdhA-rojagAra, bIjA badhAmAMthI samajathI chUTI gayA chIe, paNa jJAnathI chUTyA nathI. eTale jJAnathI chUTe tyAre spaSTa vedana thAya. e spaSTa vedana thAya e bIjo pAyo. pachI trIjo pAyo kevaLajJAna, badhuM ja dekhADe. praznakartA : lokAloka. dAdAzrI : lokAloka. atyAre lokAloka amane samajAya kharuM paNa rUpakamAM nA Ave. eTale kevaLa darzanamAM kharuM. atyAre A pahelo pAyo thaI gayo. bahu thaI gayuM. pachI ApaNe kAma ja zuM ? jaina to zuM kahe, pahelo pAyo, ohoho, A to bhagavAna thaI gayo. bAramA guThANA vagara pahelo pAyo nA Ave. dazamAM guMThANA sudhI koI dahADo pahelo pAyo aDe nahIM. e pahelo pAyo A tamane prApta thayo che ! agiyAramuM guMThANuM e paDavAnuM sthAna che. dasamA guMThANA sudhI lobha hoya, sUkSma lobha hoya. e lobha jyAM sudhI tUTe nahIM tyAM sudhI bAramuM guNasthAnaka Ave nahIM. pachI game te rIte lobha tUTe, kramikathI ke akamathI. paNa lobha tUTe tyAre bAramuM guMThANuM sparze. jyAM sudhI lobha hoya tyAM sudhI ahaMkAra jAya nahIM. praznakartA : lobha to aneka prakArano hoya che. lobha to jJAna meLavavAno ya hoya. dAdAzrI : e to badhI jAtanAM lobha, aneka prakAranAM. have e lobha hoya tyAM sudhI dasamuM guMThANuM jAya nahIM, tyAM sudhI ahaMkAra tUTe nahIM. ahaMkAra bAramAmAM tUTI jAya. ahaMkAra tUTyo eTale bAramAmAM ja beTho kahevAya. pachI koI paNa raste tUTyo hoya, akrama rIte ke game te rIte paNa e bAramA guNakasthAnamAM peTho ane eTale pahelo zukladhyAnano pAyo kahevAya. kevaLajJAna thayuM, ene teramuM guThANuM kahevAya. kevaLajJAna, zukladhyAnano trIjo pAyo ane teramuM guMThANuM, A traNeva sAthe ja hoya che ane ApaNuM A bAramuM guMThANuM che. eTale ApaNe eno svAda cAkhyA karo. dhIme dhIme ApaNI zaktio badhI khIlaze. have AvaraNo badhuM tUTIne khalAsa thavA mAMDaze badhuMya. mULa AvaraNa tUTI gayuM che. have zaktio khIlaze. praznakartA : aMtaramAM zubha bhAva sivAya kaMI ja rahetuM nathI. dAdAzrI : e vyavahArathI dharmadhyAna yoga che ane nizcayathI zukladhyAna e dazA che atyAre. ane vyavahAra guMThANuM have UMcuM jatuM jAya. pAMcamethI chaTTe jAya, sAtame jAya, AThame jAya. vyavahAramAM jyAre strIno paricaya chUTe tyAre navamuM oLaMge. jyAre vyavahAra, lakSmInuM kaMI e rahe nahIM, tyAre dazamuM oLaMge vyavahArathI. dhIme dhIme vyavahAra UMco jaze have. ApaNe nizcayanuM guMThANuM joItuM hatuM te maLI gayuM. badhuM bahu thaI gayuM. A vyavahAra to UMce vadho ke nA vadho, vyavahAra InAma joItuM nathI ApaNe. ApaNe to ekAvatArI thaIne mokSe javuM che. ApaNe aMdara paramAnaMda hovo joIe. te niraMtara rahe chene ! A bAramuM guNasthAnaka che. bAramA guNasthAnakamAM tame cho, bAramAmAM huM chuM ne teramAmAM bhagavAna mahAvIra hatA, kevaLajJAna thayuM tyAre ne caudamuM mokSanuM guMThANuM kahevAya. tamArA ne mArA vacce nizcayathI bAramuM guThANuM eka ja, paNa Dipharansa zuM che ? zukladhyAna tamAruM pahelA pAyAnuM che ne mAruM bIjA pAyAnuM che. pahelA pAyAnuM eTale aspaSTa vaMdana. tamane AtmAnuM vadana rahyA kare. aMdarathI lakSa rahyA kare, jAgRti rahyA kare e svasaMvedana kahevAya. eno lAbheya maLyA kare. nirAkuLatAno lAbheya maLyA kare. vyAkuLa jagyAe nirAkuLatAmAM rahevAya ane ame to bhayaMkara vyAkuLa jagyAe nirAkuLatAmAM rahelAM, A to TesTeDa kahevAya. 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e dhyAna niraMtara rahyA kare. e zukladhyAnano pahelo pAyo che, e aspaSTa vedana che ane amAre zukladhyAnano bIjo pAyo, spaSTa vedana hoya ane A zukladhyAnanA trIjA pAyAmAM kevaLajJAna thAya ne cothA pAyAmAM mokSamAM pahoMcI jAya !

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404 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) [9] ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAtathI ! mahAtmAonuM vyaktitva saubha ! praznakartA : mahAtmA kone kahevAya ? dAdAzrI : AMtarika saMyama rahe, ene mahAtmA kahevAya. bAhya saMyama to hoya ke nA ya hoya ! kaSAya karato hoya tyAM sudhI mahAtmA kahevAya nahIM. 'caMdubhAI' krodha kare paNa 'pote' aMdarathI mahIM nA pADyA kare. arere, A kema thAya che, A nA thavuM joIe' evuM rahe ene. e AMtarika saMyama kahevAya. ene mahAtmA kahevAya ! praznakartA : zuddhAtmA ane mahAtmAmAM phera zo ? dAdAzrI : zuddhAtmA to bhagavAna che. mahAtmA to, A koI paNa bIjA karatAM jarA Topa hoya to ene mahAtmA kahevAya che. A to vyavahArathI ApaNe mahAtmA kahIe chIe, paNa che to zuddhAtmA. zuddhAtmA to bhagavAna che, paNa e bhagavAna haju tamane pratIti svarUpe thayelAM che. e pratIti jyAre pUrI thaze, tyAre anubhava dazA saMpUrNa thaze. atyAre pratIti-lakSa-anubhava e caDha-utara thayA kare, paNa saMpUrNa anubhava varte, jyAre abhedatA lAge badhAM joDe, tyAre che te zuddhAtmA thaI zake. zuddhAtmA e ja paramAtmA che. peluM sAcuM jJAna jANeluM jAya nahIM, e paramenanTa che ane e poteya sanAtana svabhAvano che, enuM jJAneya sanAtana che, sukheya sanAtana che, enI vAteya sanAtana che ane e prApta thayA pachI mANasane zuM prApta thayuM ? ena.o.sI. maLI gayuM. e mANasane koI jagyAe oNjekazana hoya nahIM. bhagavAneya ene oNnjakazana nA kare. praznakartA : mahAtmAnI kAryavAhI zuM ? dAdAzrI : A je gayA avatArano badho mAla bharelo che, tene samatApUrvaka javA devo. praznakartA : mahAtmAnI upamA meLavyA pachI tenI pharaja zuM ? dAdAzrI : vItarAgatA rAkhavI, rAga-dveSa nahIM karavA. praznakartA H akrama mArganA mahAtmAnI dinacaryA kevI hovI joIe ? dAdAzrI : jevo mAla bharelo che e nIkaLyA kare paNa rAga-dveSa nA thAya e dinacaryA. ko'ka dhola mArI gayo hoya, ko'ka nukasAna karI gayo hoya to rAga-dveSa nA thAya evuM hovuM joIe. rAga-dveSa e Dakhala che. Dakhalano mAla tamAre khapAvyA karavAno, Dakhala nA hoya eTale thaI rahyuM. bIjuM je che e mAla nIkaLyA kare che. praznakartA : mahAtmAonuM Adarza jIvana kevuM hovuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : AjubAjunAM gharavALA, bahAravALAM badhAMya kahe, "kahevuM paDe !" eka avAja, badhAMya lIlo vAvaTo dhare. huM vaDodarAthI nIkaLuM chuM, to badhA mahAtmAne kahevAnuM. eka mahAtmA lAla vAvaTo dhare. meM kahyuM, Ubho rahe, bA. eya gADI UbhI rAkho.' basso mahAtmAmAM ekAda mahAtmA lAla vAvaTo dhare. eTale gADI UbhI rAkhe. 'zuM hakIkata che bola', ene samAdhAna karAvIne pachI javAnuM. kAraNa ke e mahAtmAnA tAbAmAM huM chuM, e mAre tAbe nathI. eTale ApaNA mahAtmAe to badhAnAM tAbAmAM rahevuM joIe.

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 405 406, AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : roja savAranA UThe tyArathI te rAta sudhImAM emano nitya kAryakrama zuM hovo joIe ? dAdAzrI : e ahIM koI kAyado nathI. kAyado hoya tyAM gaNavAnuM hoya. ahIM to no laoN - laoN che. e nizcaya ApaNe ke, 'Ama hovuM joIe, A na thavuM joIe'. paNa chatAM je nIkaLe e sAcuM. sigareTa pIto hoya te bahAra jaIne pI Avato hoya paNa manamAM ema hovuM joIe ke "A na hovI joIe. praznakartA: savAramAM vaheluM UThavuM joIe evuM kaMI kharuM? dAdAzrI : nA, bA. koI vahelA UThato hoya, te traNa vAgyAnA UThIne baMbo saLagAvanArA hoya ane bIjo koI moDo UThato hoya, te sADA na thAya to huM kahuM ke, 'bhaI, sUryanArAyaNa kyAranAya UThIne ahIM AvyA che. tuM to jarA vicAra kara. AvaDA moTA UThIne AvyA che tuM ethI keTalo moTo ?" tyAre vahelo vahelo UThI jAya. kAraNa ke traNa vAgyAnA UThIne ahIM AvanArA ane sADA nava vALAya kharA. badhI jAtanA loka hoya ! praznakartA : A "jJAna" lIdheluM hoya tevAe rAtre kaI rIte sUI javuM, e samajAvo. dAdAzrI : pote zuddhAtmA thaI jaI ane bIjI badhI vastuone kahIe ke, 'have ame ophisa baMdha karI daIe chIe. tame savAramAM Avajo, sADA cha vAge. have atyAre ophisa baMdha che.' je je vicAro AvatA hoya te badhAne kahI devAnuM, "Aje pahelo divasa che, eTale rikvesTa karIe chIe ke, have tame atyAre Avazo nahIM. nahIM to tamAruM apamAna thaze, mATe pharI Avazo nahIM.' eTale pachI baMdha thaI jAya. ane 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM, zuddhAtmA chuM' ema dhIme rahIne ApaNA ja kAnane saMbhaLAya e rIte dAdAnA citrapaTanuM nididhyAsana karatAM karatAM sUI javuM. praznakartA : mahAtmAno mokSa kyAre thAya ? dAdAzrI : eka-be avatAra ke traNa avatAra pachI. A kSAyaka samakita che. AvuM sATha hajAra mANasane ApeluM che, A kaMI eka-benI nathI vAta. jagata AkhuM roMga biliphamAM che, toye potAnuM mAne che ne ? tadana sAcesAcuM potAnuM mAne che ne ? ane ApaNane rAITa bilipha beThelI che. ane te to sAcuM ja che. pelA khoTAne sAcuM mAne che toya sAcI rIte varte che. to ApaNe sAcAne sAcI rIte mAnavuM. tyAra pachI sAcI rIte vartavuM joIene ! ApaNuM to ekajhekTa sAcuM ja che. eTale ApaNe sAmA mANasane ema kahevuM joIe ke huM zuddhAtmA padane prApta thayo chuM. bIjA prazno mane pUchazo nahIM. kazuM pUchavuM hoya to jJAnI puruSanI pAse Avo. paNa ApaNA badhA adabada bole che ne, tethI bahAra vAta samajAya nahIM lokone ! ApaNane kahevAmAM vAMdho zo ? je ApaNI mAnyatA che te. praznakartA H Apa ema koIvAra pUcho cho pragati thAya che ke nahIM ? tyAre pragati kaI jagyAe dekhAya ? eTale ke pragatimAM zuM dekhAya ? kevI rIte khabara paDe ? dAdAzrI : Dakho nA thAya che. koInI joDe DakhoDakhala nA thAya. agara to ApaNI jAtane paNa Dakho nA thAya. e joI le eTale pragati thaI che. koInI joDe Dakho thaI gayo to bagaDyuM. himAlayamAM phare, game tyAM phare paNa A vastu prApta thaI zake nahIM. A to kamiTamArganA jJAnIo hoyane, to tyAM AgaLa to traNa ke cAra ja jaNa bujha, vadhAre bujhe nahIM. A to akrama vijJAna che. dasa lAkha varSe ko'ka phero UbhuM thAya. tyAre lAkho mANaso laI jAya ! tenI mahIM TikiTa maLI gaI. eksagnala kesa, TikiTa maLI A ! eTale karoDo avatAreya je vastu prApta nA thAya e tamane saheje prApta thaI che. mATe have enuM rakSaNa karajo. bIjuM badhuM dhyAnamAM lezo nahIM. saMsAra to cAlyA ja karavAno badho. e kazuM aTake nahIM koI dahADoya. jema A dADhInI icchA nA hoya to ya thayA kare chene ? ema saMsAra cAlyA

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 407 408 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) karavAno. A icchA hoya ke nAya icchA hoya. ane je svabhAva che e svabhAvamAM ja thayA karavAnuM. e saMsAramAM ApaNe A Avo joIe ke tevo joIe, e cAle nahIM tyAM AgaLa. mATe ATaluM sAcavajo TheTha sudhI ! praznakartA: jyAre huM nijabhAvamAM raheto houM, pachI chelle mane je khoTa pUrI thavAnI hoya tyAre mane zuM evo bhAsa thAya ke have kaMIka pUruM thayuM che mAruM ? dAdAzrI : e to tamane A saMsArI du:kho ke bojo ocho thato jAya ane tame mukta cho e bhAna vadhAre thatuM jAya. tame mukta sukha bhogavI rahyA cho e bhAna vadhAre pragaTa thAya. huM kahuM chuMne ke mAre bhaI, satyAvIza varSathI to huM mukta ja chuM ane vidhAuTa Tenzana. eTale Tenzana thatuM'tuM 'e.ema. paTela'ne. kaMI mane na'tuM thatuM. paNa 'e. ema. paTelane ya Tenzana thAya che tyAM sudhI ApaNe bojo ja che ne ! e pUruM thAya tyAre ApaNe jANavuM ke ApaNe chUTayA ane toya deha che tyAM sudhI baMdhana. ane te to amane vAMdho nathI have. be avatAra thAya toya vAMdho nathI. amAro to hetu zuM che ke, 'A je sukhane huM pAmyo chuM e sukhane AkhuM jagata pAmo" ane tamAre zemAM utAvaLa che e kaho. tamane tyAM pahoMcavAnI utAvaLa che ? jIvatAM mokSa thayAnI pArAzIzI ! amAro mokSa thaI gayelo che, amAre mokSa karIne zuM kAma che te? taiyAra thaI gayelo hoya, tene zuM kADhavAnuM !? praznakartA : mokSa thaI gayo evI khabara kevI rIte paDe ? dAdAzrI : mokSa thaI gayo hoya enI khabara kyAre paDe ke A duniyAmAM koI cIjanI icchA nA hoya. evI koI cIja nathI ke jenI icchA thAya agara teno saMkalpa hoya ke eno vikalpa hoya. eTale pote jANe ke nirvikalpI, pote nirIcchaka thaI gayo, eTale mukta ja kahevAya. kaMI paNa icchA che tyAM sudhI bhikhArI, icchAvAna bhikhArI kahevAya. koI mANasane eka thAMbhalA joDe Ama doraDA vIMTIne bAMdhyo hoya pagathI mAthA sudhI ne AMkhe pATA bAMdhyA hoya. have ene ApaNe koI paNa mANasa pAchaLathI doraDuM Ama dhIme rahIne cappAthI kApI nAkhe ane ahIM AgaLa eka AMTo chUTe tyAre potAne khabara paDe kharI ? eka AMTo mahIM DhIlo thayo hoya, te baMdhAyelAne khabara paDe kharI ? praznakartA : DhIluM thAya to khyAla Ave. dAdAzrI : zuM lAge ene ke A jagyAe DhIluM thayuM. A AMTo khUlyo. AMTo khUlelo ApaNane anubhavamAM Ave tyAre jANavuM ke AMTA khUlavA mAMDyA. ame tamane anubhava lAvI ApIe. mokSano anubhava, mokSamAM beTho che evo anubhava thAya ane upAdhinI mahIM anubhava thAya. samAdhimAM to, samAdhi kUtarAMya rAkhe, baLyA ! be purIo ApIene, te AkhI rAta samAdhi rAkhe. paNa upAdhimAM samAdhimAM rAkhe e vijJAna kahevAya. praznakartA: to pachI dAdAnuM jJAna lIdhA pachIthI je muktatA varte che, aMdarathI jANe mukta thatA hoya evA anubhava thayA kare to e zuM? dAdAzrI : e mukta cho ja. e to 'huM baMdhAyelo chuM' evI je tamArI bilipho hatI e tUTI gaI ane huM mukta chuM' evI tamane bilipha besatI gaI. mokSanI gADImAM beThA pachI utAvaLa ? praznakartA : koI vakhata mokSe javAnI utAvaLa bahu thAya che ! dAdAzrI : utAvaLa karazo to Thokara khAzo. mokSa maLI gayA pachI mokSanI utAvaLa zI ? utAvaLa zene mATe ? koI tamAruM rijharvezana laI levAnuM che ? rijharvezana koIthI aDAya nahIM ! je gAma javAnuM hoya teno nizcaya, tenI TikiTa, badhuM thaI gayuM ! ko'kane puchI levAnuM. gADI kevI che ? tyAre kahe, spIDI. besIne pachI sUI javAnuM ! koI mANasa gADImAM beTho muMbaI javA mATe vaDodarAthI ane

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410 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 409 bArInI bahAra joyA kare, muMbaI dekhAyuM.... to kyAre pAra Ave ? A loko zuM kahe che ? bhaI, zuM juo cho ? tyAre kahe, 'kaMI dekhAya che muMbaI, kaMI tapAsa karIne ?" "alyA mUA, sUI jAne ! gAMDo che ke zuM ?" bairI ya ema kahe ke "A mUrakha che. tamane kyAM paiNI huM ?" evuM koI karatuM haze ? are, ghaNAM mANaso gADImAM doDadhAma kare. kema ? "jaladI pahoMcavuM che. amArA oLakhItA bahu mAMdA che. savAramAM nIkaLIne tyAMthI davAkhAnAmAM javAnuM." alyA mUA, ahIM dhakamaka zuM karavA kare che, Ama doDadhAma doDadhAma ? vagara kAmano mUo, UMghato nathI ne lokone UMdhavA nahIM deto. are bhAI, UtarIne jaje. sahuthI pahelo tuM jaje, paNa nirAMte sUI jAne atyAre. A jJAnathI to tamane bIja thaI gaI che. have jema jema AjJAmAM rahezo tema pachI pUnama thaze. praznakartA : pUnama karavA mATe utkaMThA to joIene ke jaladI thAya ! dAdAzrI : jaladInI vAta nathI. ApaNe AjJA pALyA karavAnI, basa, ApaNe vadhAre pALo, enuM pariNAma pUnama Avaze. A to pAchI pUnameya rIsAya pachI ke ohoho, jo mArA vagara emane gamatuM nathI ! tArA vagara badhuya game che, tuM sAmI Ava, bA ! ame to A cAlyA, e sAmI Avaze. je pada sAmA Ave, enI utkaMThA kevI ? mokSeya sAmo AvI rahyo che, ne badhuM sAruM AvI rahyuM che. ApaNe to ApaNI meLe dAdA kahe e pramANe karyA karavAnuM, basa, bIjI bhAMjagaDamAM nahIM paDavAnuM. AgaLa javA jAya to bojo vadhI jAya pAcho. vaLI pAcho eno bojo koNa le vagara kAmano ? praznakartA : kema dAdA, enA mATenI tIvratA na hovI joIe ? dAdAzrI : nA, tIvratA to A pAMca AjJAmAM raho tenI ja karavAnI che. pelI vastu je kArya che, tene mATe nathI karavAnI. kAraNanI tIvratA karavAnI che, kArya to phaLa che. phaLanI tIvratA karIne loka kAraNamAM kAcA paDI gayA che. kArya moTuM ke kAraNa moTuM ? praznakartA : kAraNa moTuM, dAdA, paNa lakSa mATenI tIvratA kaho. dAdAzrI : e to rahe ja. e to ochuM paDe ja nahIM. ApaNe ahIM gherathI rastA upara jaIe ne, to nIce ja dAdarA utarIne javAnA chIe e vAta yAda rAkhavAnI jarUra nahIM. ApaNe najIkanuM pagathiyuM joI joIne cAlavuM, eTale nahIM paDIe. bAkI nIce ja pahoMcavAnA chIe. mokSa mATe bAkI keTaluM ? praznakartA : mokSa A bhavamAM to maLavAno nathI, to mokSa mATe keTalA bhava levA paDe ? dAdAzrI : e to jeTalI AjJA pALene, sittera TakA jo pALe to te eka avatAramAM ja mokSe jAya. eTale vadhAremAM vadhAre cAra ne ochAmAM ocho eka. paNa pachI jarAya AjJA nA pALe to doDhasoya thAya. praznakartA : Apa kaho cho ke jJAna lIdhA pachI koIne karma cArja thatuM ja nathI, badhuM DiscArja ja thayA kare che. to badhA eka ja avatAramAM mokSe javA joIene ? dAdAzrI : amArI je AjJA pALe chene, eTalo kartAbhAva rahe che. eTale ene laIne eka ke be avatAra thAya. jevI AjJA pALe enA para ekAda avatAra vadhatA-ocho thAya. vadhAremAM vadhAre traNa-cAra lAge, paNa chatAMya je mANasa bahu dhyAna nA rAkhe, mArI joDe bahu TacamAM nA Ave to ene bahu tyAre paMdara thAya, koIne so-bassoya thaI jAya. paNa kaMIka lAbha thaze ene. mane maLyo chene, ahIM aDI gayo che, ene lAbha thayA vagara rahevAno nathI. janmo bahu ochAM thaI jaze. paNa mane jeTalo vadhAre bhego thAya ane badhA khulAsA karI le, huM ema nathI kaheto ke Akho dA'Do paDI rahe. pAMca miniTa AvIne khulAsA karI jA tuM. tane zuM aDacaNa Ave che ? bhUlacUka thatI hoya to ame tamane bIjI kuMcIo ApI daIe ne bhUlacUka sudhArI daIe. kAraNa ke kalAkanI jJAnavidhithI phanDAmenTala maLe che. pachI vigata meLavI levI joIene ! eka DaoNkTara thavuM hoya tene mATe

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 411 412 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) TAIma to bagADone ? kolejamAM bhaNatA paccIsa-paccIsa varSa TAIma bagADe che. te Ane mATe kaMIka kvaoNliphikezana joIene ? praznakartA: eTale dAdA, evuM thAya ke mokSa maLavAmAM vilaMba thAya ? be avatAranA badale cAra avatAra thAya evuM thAya ? dAdAzrI : e thAya, to vAMdho zuM che paNa ? praznakartA : paNa jaladI javuM che. vacce kyAMka bharAI paDIe to ? dAdAzrI : eka saMta puruSane to nArade kahyuM, pelo kahe che, "nAradajI, pUchI AyA bhagavAnane ke mAro mokSa thaze ?" tyAre nAradajIe kahyuM, 'hA, bhagavAne kahyuM mokSa thaze. A je AMbalI nIce beThA cho, enA pAMdaDA che eTalA avatAra thaze pachI tamAro mokSa thaze." "thaze kharo, kahyuM chene, te bahu thaI gayuM.' te mokSa thavAno enA AnaMdamAM bahu nAcyA pachI, khUba nAcyA. eTale mokSa thaze ja. enI mahatvatA che. kyAre thaze e pachI dekha leMge. kare. e sahu sahunA lobhanI vAta che. bahu lobhiyo hoya ne, te jatAM jatAM kaheze, 'have pharI AvavAnuM nathI, te pUrAM karI lo, thoDAka dahADA kADhIzuM. pharI jaIzuM. utAvaLa zI che ?" ema karIne. paNa ene mokSe gaye ja chUTako che. praznakartA: dAdA, saMsAranA lobhanI vAta karo cho ? dAdAzrI : tyAre bIjo kayo lobha che ? lobha to saMsAramAM ja hoyane ! pelAmAM to lobha hoya nahIMne ! lobha to roga che, e roga kyAM sudhI hoya ? jyAM sudhI mahIM paDI rahyo hoya tyAM sudhI. praznakartA : eka avatAra bAkI hoya e keTalA varSano gaNAya ? dAdAzrI : e to manuSyano avatAra hoya to te so varSano hoya, bAsI varSano ya hoya. je Ave e barobara. A devalokono avatAra hoya, te lAkha-be lAkha varSano hoya. rakhaDI koNa paDe ? praznakartA : badhA mahAtmAo kahe che ame mahAvideha kSetramAM javAnAne ? dAdAzrI : keTalAkane ahIM AvIne pachI javAnuM hoya ekAda avatAra karIne. mahIM kaMI hisAba bAMdhelo hoya te ApI devo paDene ! paNa javAnA tyAM. hisAba to cUkavavo ja paDe. vacce A jJAna letAM pahelAM kaMIka evuM kharAba karma bAMdhI dIdhuM hoya ekAda. eTale eno daMDa thayelo hoya, te daMDa to bhogavavo ja paDene ! ane bhogavI le e chUTo. avatAra eTale daMDa. praznakartA: eTale jJAna lIdhA pachI koI rakhaDI paDe kharo ? kAyama mATe rakhaDI paDe jJAna lIdhA pachI koI ? dAdAzrI : rakhaDI paDe ! jJAna pariNAma pAme nahIM, pachI artha nA rahyone ! avaLuM cAlyuM, avaLuM ja. badhAnuM avaLuM ja bola bola kare to ? praznakartA : paNa pagathiyAM UtarI paDIe to vadhAre avatAra thaI jAyane ? dAdAzrI : "dAdA, dAdA' karatAM AgaLa cAlyA javuM. kazAno bhaya rAkhavAno nahIM ke Ama thaze to zuM thaze ? praznakartA : dareka avatAramAM mokSanuM lakSa to rahe ja ne ? dAdAzrI : have bahu kyAM thavAnA ? lakSa to joDe rahevAnuMne ! mokSa svarUpa ja rahevAnuM. lobhiyo kevo, mokSa mATe ? bAkI ahIM ja mokSa thaI javo joIe. A to akrama vijJAna che, ekAvanArI vijJAna che. pachI eka ja avatAra bAkI rahe. ko'kane be avatAra thAya, ko'kane traNa avatAra thAya. jeTalo lobha hoya eTalA vadhAre avatAra kADhyA vagara chUTako ja nathI. paNa vadhAre lobha hoya to daza-paMdara

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 413 praznakartA : avaLuM eTale kevuM ? dAdAzrI : koIka avaLuM bole eTale A tamArI vAta nIkaLe eTale AvaDI AvaDI copaDe. evA nA hoya loko ? praznakartA : eTale jJAnanI virAdhanA kare e ? dAdAzrI : jJAnanI ane jJAnInI ane jJAnInA pholoarsanI ne badhAMnI virAdhanA kare. pustako ne badhAMnI. 'A copaDI mArA hAthamAM Ave to pheMkI dauM' kahe. pachI to enA pustakonI virAdhanA kare. pustako pheMke Ama. 'cAla haTa, A copaDIo lAvyo, to dariyAmAM nAkhI daIza, nahIM to saLagAvI daIza.' phoTAonI virAdhanA karI mele, bALI mele phoTA. praznakartA : jeNe jJAna lIdhuM che enI vAta che ? dAdAzrI : hA, te badhuM pharI jAyane ! praznakartA H jJAnInA mahAtmA hoya, enI paNa virAdhanA nA thAya ? dAdAzrI : jJAnInA mahAtmAo eTale jJAnI ja kahevAyane ! A mahAtmAo eTale zuM vAta karo cho ? ke jeNe potAnA hathiyAra nIce mUkyA che. koIne mAravAno bhAva nathI. koIne lUMTI levAnI icchA nathI. koI pAsethI paDAvI levAnI icchA nathI. evAM jeNe hathiyAra badhAM nIce mUkI dIdhA, krodha-mAna-mAyA-lobhanAM ! anaMta avatAranI khoTo chene, te eka avatAramAM khoTa vALavAnI hoya to zuM karavuM paDe ? dAdAnI pAchaLa paDavuM joIe. dAdA nA hoya to dAdAnA kahelA zabdonI pAchaLa paDavuM joIe. enI pAchaLa paDIne, anaMta avatAranI khoTa eka avatAramAM vALI devAnI. keTalA avatAranI khoTa ? ApaNe atyAra sudhI anaMta avatAra lIdhA, e badhI khoTa to kharIne ? e khoTa kADhavI paDe ke nA kADhavI joIe ? have to bhekha mAMDavAno che ke A eka ja, bIjuM nahIM. nA hoya to mokSanuM niyANuM karI nAkhavAnuM eTale lAMbA avatAra nA thAya. betraNa avatAra thatA hoya teya nA thAya ! AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) amuka tArIkhe muMbaI javuM che te ApaNA lakSamAM rahe, evI rIte ApaNe mokSamAM javuM che e lakSamAM rahevuM joIe. kyAM javuM che e lakSamAM nA rahe to kAmanuM zuM ? muMbaI javuM che e lakSamAM rahene ? bhUlI javAya ? praznakartA : nA bhUlAya. 414 dAdAzrI : evuM A lakSamAM rahevuM joIe. ApaNe to have e bAju javA nIkaLyA. vaheluM Ave, moDuM Ave, paNa e bAju javA nIkaLyA, jeTaluM jora karIe eTaluM ApaNuM. A jAte rUbarU bhegA thAya to plenanI mAphaka cAle, ne nahIM to sUkSma dAdA hoya toya peluM TreInanI mAphaka cAle. te jeTaluM plenathI javAya eTaluM sAcuM. chatAM bahu ukela AvI jaze. eka avatAra ja phakta bAkI rahevo joIe, teya puNya bhogavavAmAM. amArI AjJA pALIne, tenI jabarajasta puNya bhegI thAya. mRtyu samayanI jAgRti ! A niHzaMka thayA, have AjJAmAM raho. dhaiDapaNa kADhI nAkho. A deha jato rahe to bhale jato rahe, kAna kApI le to kApI le, pudgala nAkhI devAnuM ja che. pudgala pArakuM che. pArakI vastu ApaNI pAse rahevAnI nathI. e to eno TAIma haze, vyavasthitano TAIma haze, te dahADe jyAre ho tyAre laI le. bhaya rAkhavAno nahIM. ApaNe kahIe laI lo. tethI koI lenAruM navaruM nathI. paNa te ApaNAmAM nirbhayatA rAkhe. je thavuM hoya te thAva, kahIe. evuM che, A caMdubhAI nAmano deha, ApaNane mahAmitra samAna thaI paDyo che ke A dehe ApaNe akrama jJAnIne oLakhyA ane akrama jJAna ApaNane prApta thayuM ane te anubhavamAM siddha thayuM. mATe have A dehane kahIe ke, 'he mitra, tAre je davA karavI haze te huM karIza. agara to hiMsaka davA haze to teya karIne paNa tuM rahe.' evI ApaNI bhAvanA hovI joIe. A deha nahIM evA badhA bahu deha gayA-baLyA, badhAya deha nakAmA gayAne ! anaMta avatAra deha nakAmA gayA. paNa A dehe to ApaNane yathArtha phaLa dekhADyuMne ! ane caMdubhAInA nAma para dekhADyuMne !! mATe A deha sAcavajo ane have kAma kADhI lo.

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 415 416 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : ame zAna lIdhuM che, to amAre mRtyu samaye zuM karavuM joIe ? dAdAzrI : jJAtA-draSTA rahevAnuM. ApaNI aMdara zuM cAlI rahyuM che, tene joyA ja karavAnuM. e nA rahevAya to dAdAnI pAMca AjJAmAM rahevuM. rileTiva-riyala joyA karavuM. aMta samaya sAcavaze dAdA ! praznakartA : mahAtmAne kyAre mRtyu thavAnuM che e khabara paDe kharI ? jo badhI ja AzA pALato hoya ApanI ane jJAtA-drA tarIke raheto hoya, to ene aMta samaya Avyo che evI khabara paDe kharI ?! dAdAzrI : khabara paDe, nA paDe toya vAMdho nathI. paNa tyAM AgaLa dAdA sAcavaze TheTha sudhI. eTale ciMtA karazo nahIM. ATaluM karanArane dAdA badhI rIte sAcavI leze. praznakartA H te samaye koI anubhava thAya ? dAdAzrI : anubhava thaI jAyane ! AtmAmAM ja haze te ghaDIe. chello eka kalAka AtmAmAM ja hoya, bahAra nIkaLe ja nahIM. kAraNa ke bahAra bhayajanaka vAtAvaraNa lAge. de koI ? e to badhAne khaseDIne, ene javA nA detAM hoya toya jato rahene ? are, badhAne dhakkA mArIne jato rahe. badhI mamatA choDI devAnI zarate mane jIvato rAkho. te maratI vakhate AvAM khela thAya che ! ApaNAM jJAnavALAne, te mahIM AtmAmAM pesI jAya chene, pachI ApaNe kahIe, 'bahAra nIkaLo ne !' tyAre kahe, "nA, bA. mAre have kazuM joItuM nathI.' ene samAdhi maraNa kahevAmAM Ave che. bahAra zarIramAM uMuM... thatuM hoya ane mahIM potAne samAdhi hoya. chellI ghaDIe ATalo badho AjJAmAM rahe che. eTale koIe ciMtA nahIM karavAnI. praznakartA : maratI vakhate dAdA hAjara raheze ? dAdAzrI : hA. hAjara to, kharekharA hAjara raheze. ADe dahADe hAjara rahetA hoya to maratI vakhate nA rahe ? ADe dahADe hAjara rahe chene ? Akho dahADo rahe che ! thayuM tyAre jo Akho dahADo rahe che evuM kahe che ne ! thaze samAdhi maraNa ! maraNa vakhate AtmAnI guphAmAM ja pesI jAya tadana, bahAra rahe ja nahIM, Ubho ja nA rahe ! e eno mukhya guNa che A. bahu muzkelI cogaradamanI hoyane, tyAre guphAmAM pesI jAya. e moTAmAM moTo guNa che. ane pelA bIjA badhAne, zAna nA hoya tene to guphA hoya ja nahIM, to pachI pesavuM zI rIte te ?! caMdubhAIthI judA rahevuM joIe ApaNe. caMdubhAI judA ne ApaNe judA. A to sthira rAkhe evuM che ApaNuM vijJAna. bahu muzkelI Avene, tyAre guphAmAM pesI jAya e. praznakartA : paNa dAdA, darekane potapotAnA bhayanI limiTa hoyane ! koI thoDA bhayamAM pesI jAya ane koI vadhAre bhayamAM pesI jAya. dAdAzrI : hA, e to sahu sahunI potAnI limiTa che, paNa saravALe svabhAva to, chevaTe potAnI guphAmAM pesI javAno ja svabhAva. mane kahe che ke dAdA, maratI vakhate samAdhi maraNa thaze ? meM kahyuM, atyAre samAdhi praznakartA : dAdAne bhajavAmAM je dehe sAtha Apyo che ane Ape che, te aMtima samaye deha choDatAM chellI ghaDIe dAdA hAjara rahe tevo bhAva karuM chuM, prabhu mane evuM Apajo. - dAdAzrI : sTImara DUbavAnI hoya tyAre e sTImaranI mamatA choDI de ke nA choDI de ? sTImara DabatI hoya ane eka bAju kahe che, "cAlo pesenjaro, AmAM hoDIomAM UtarI jAva. kazuM lezo nahIM. hAthamAM vajana lezo nahIM.' te mamatA choDI de ! nA choDe ? e sTImaramAM besI rahe pachI ? ane pachI 'dareka gharanAM be mANasa levAnA che." eTale enAM bAbAne javA de ke e Doso pote jAya ? nA javA de. A bIjAne javA

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418 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 417 rahe che to te ghaDIe to vadhAre bhaya hoya. eTale badhA aMdara potAnA gharamAM ja pese. bahAra nIkaLe ja nahIM ne ! eTale samAdhi maraNa ja thavAnuM. ane jene jJAna nA hoya, e kyAM pese ? nAnI choDI paiNAvAnI rahI gaI, te e emAM pesI jAya, nahIM to bajAramAM pese mUo. eTale tyAM inTaresTa hoya e choDImAM, tyAM beTho beTho jANe hamaNe jatAM jatAM paiNAvIne javAno hoyane, evI vAta karato hoya. kAraNa ke bhaya lAge tyAre kyAM javuM e enI pAse bIjuM sAdhana nathIne ! ane ApaNe pote AtmAmAM javuM e sAdhana che, ane pelAnI pAse sAdhana nathI, e kyAM jAya ? eTale AvI koI saMjJA khoLI kADhe, AvI viSaya saMbaMdhI. praznakartA : dAdA, eTale e kAraNa deha baMdhAI gayo hoya ? dAdAzrI : e to baMdhAyelo ja che. paNa A vadhArAnuM cItare. ane ApaNe to mahIM AtmAmAM chIe eTale AtmAmAM jatA rahIe. tyAM paramAnaMda che ja. tyAM gayA eTale kazuM duHkha rahyuM ja nahIMne ! mRtyunI vedanA vakhate ... praznakartA : je vakhate mANasa maravA paDe che, e vakhate ene eka hajAra vIMchInI vedanA thAya, to te vakhate A jJAna rahe ke nA rahe ? dAdAzrI : A jJAna hAjara rahe ja. maratI vakhate niraMtara samAdhi Apaze. atyAre samAdhi Ape, e jJAna maratI vakhate to hAjara thAya ja. eTale maraNa vakhate saravaiyuM hAjara thAya AkhI jiMdagInuM. praznakartA : naso kheMcAtI hoya, nADo tUTatI hoya... dAdAzrI : teno vAMdho nahIM. naso kaMI bebhAna thaI jAyane, toya ene mahIM che te dhyAna hoya, zukladhyAna choDe nahIMne ! eka phero utpanna thayeluM pachI choDe nahIM. atyAre ja ciMtA thavA detuM nathIne ? praznakartA : nA. dAdAzrI : to je ciMtA thavA nathI detuM dhyAna, e varlDamAM koI dA'Do baneluM nahIM evI vastu Aja banI che. to e maratI vakhate tamane choDatuM haze ke ? 'huM zuddhAtmA chuM' e bhAna rahyuM ke samAdhi maraNa kahevAya. pachI dehane game eTalI pIDA thatI hoya, tene jovAnuM nahIM. eTale jAgRta rahyo te vakhate. moha ocho thAya eTale mamatA ochI thAya che. pachI mamatAnI khabara paDe ke "A mAruM nathI, tenI mamatA karuM chuM." eTale mamatA chUTI ja jAya. eTale pachI samAdhi maraNa thaI ja javAnuM che. chUTo ja raheze AvatA bhave ! praznakartA : ApaNe maraNa thAya, to ApaNI joDe ejhekTalI zuM AvavAnuM ? jeTaluM cItareluM hoya che ? dAdAzrI : zuddhAtmA thayA, pachI joDe bIjuM kazuMya AvavAnuM nathI tamAre. A eka avatArano phakta mAlasAmAna joDe eka-be thelA Avaze. jema A sAdhuo eka-be thelA nathI rAkhatA ? ghara-bAra kazuMya nahIM, eTale be thelA chevaTe raheze, eka avatAranA mATe. praznakartA : hamaNAM atyAre to DhagalA goDAuna che. dAdAzrI : e to chone lAge Dhagalo, e Dhagalo 'phorena'no chene paNa, tame tamAro mAno cho zuM karavA ? tamAro 'homa'no che ja nahIM. e bhAra ja choDI do bhAra choDIne sUI jAva nirAMte ! ApaNe joI levuM. ke A badhAM sUI gayA che, to A ApaNe sUI jAva ! praznakartA : dAdA, tame amane je chUTA pADyA che AtmA ne deha, e eka nahIM thaI jAya ? dAdAzrI : judA ja raheze. praznakartA : bIjA bhavamAM jAya toya ? dAdAzrI : hA. ahIMthI baMdhAyelo gayo, to tyAM baMdhAyelo ja rahe ane ahIMthI chUTo gayo, to tyAM chUTo ja rahe.

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 419 AvatA bhave A "jJAta' raheze ? praznakartA : A jJAna lIdheluM AvatA janme raheze ke pharI ? dAdAzrI : raheze. koI jJAna jatuM nA rahe. A jJAnaya jatuM nA rahe ane bIjuM kaMI jJAna laI Avo teya jatuM nA rahe. jJAna rahevAnuM ja badhe, jyAM jAva tyAM. praznakartA: haju eka ke be bhava bAkI rahyA che, emAM A AtmAnuM jJAna raheze ? dAdAzrI : bIjuM jJAna to atyAre bhUlI gayA chone, te joDe AvavAnuM nathI, je jJAnamAM cho te ja jJAna joDe AvavAnuM. je sTArDamAM cho e ja sTAnDarDa tamAre tyAM cAlu thaI javAnuM. eTale A ja badhuM raheze. Aje ahIM chIe ane kAle chIe e bemAM phera nahIM jarAya. phakta A zarIra badalAya eTaluM ja. bIjI sthiti temanI tema ja, ane hamaNe corabadamAza hoya, teneya che te je ahIM chene te tyAM AgaLa badhuM ema ne ema ja ! eTale tyAM kazuM koI laI nA le. A jJAna hAjara rahe. tyAre to mokSe javAya ne ! nahIM to mokSe kema javAya ? ane bhUtakALa nathI tamane yAda raheto, e to bahu UMcAmAM UMcuM ! ane bhaviSyakALa che te vyavasthitanA tAbAmAM che. eTale tamAre vartamAnakALamAM rahevuM. praznakartA : dAdA, je atyAre samakti Apo cho, jJAna Apo cho, te TheTha mokSe jatAM sudhInuM kAyama rahevAnuM A ? dAdAzrI : A mokSa thaI ja gayo, have bIjo levAno ja kyAM rahyo ? ajJAnathI mukti pahelI thAya. pachI karmo pUrAM thaI rahe, eTale bIjI mukti. praznakartA: paNa bIje bhave jJAna levuM paDe ? dAdAzrI : nA, e to A jJAna to joDe ne joDe ja hoya. A jJAna je prApta thayuM chene, tenuM te ja jJAna joDe ne joDe Ave. 420 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) je ArtadhyAna ne raudradhyAna baMdha thayuM e ja pariNAma tamane tIrthaMkara pAse besADaze. svabhAva badalAyA pachI ahIM konI joDe rahevA de ? mAbApa kyAMthI lAve ? tIrthaMkara janme to te rAjAne ghera janme, sAre ghera. paNa bhAIbaMdho to, AjubAjumAM paTela-vANiyA hoya te ja bhAIbaMdha hoyane ? nA. te pahelAM devaloko utarI gayA hoya. e devaloko manuSya rUpamAM AvIne emanI joDe rame. nahIM to pelA saMskAra khoTA paDI jAya. eTale badhuM saMjogo pramANe maLI Ave. tamArI taiyArI hoya to badhA saMjogo taiyAra che. tame vAMkA to badhA vAMkA. tame sIdhA thayA to duSamakALa naDato nathI. tamane jJAnI puruSa maLyA, AvuM jJAna maLyuM. bhalene AvAM sAta duSamakALa hoya, ApaNane zuM vAMdho ? ApaNe ApaNA jJAnamAM hoIe. ArtadhyAna-raudradhyAna thatuM nathI. koInuM kharAba thAya evA bhAva utpanna thAya nahIM kyAreya. eTale dharmadhyAnanuM phaLa eka avatAra thAya pAcho. koIne be thAya, koIne eka thAya ane koIne A jJAna maLavAthI, lAMbuMye laMbAya paNa e chUTakAro che e nakkI. kAraNa ke karma baMdhAtAM aTakI gayA. praznakartA : vacce amuka avatAro pachI jo chUTakAro thavAno hoya, to pachI AgalA avatAromAM paNa A ja sthiti cAlu rahe che ? dAdAzrI : sthiti to, ahIM 99 sudhI pahoMcyA hoya, to 99thI pharI tamAre cAlu thAya. A bhAIne 81 sudhI hoya to 81thI cAlu thAya. praznakartA : eTale AvatAM avatAramAM paNa karma nA baMdhAya, e sthiti cAlu ja rahe. dAdAzrI : badhI sthiti cAlu rahe. je jJAna tame laIne AvyAne, te to ahIM chellI sthiti vakhate, maraNa sthiti vakhate hAjara rahevAnuM ane pachI Avate bhava tyAM hAjara rahevAnuM. praznakartA: have bIjo bhava kare, te vakhate A jJAna kaMI yAda AvI jAya ApaNane ?

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422 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 421 dAdAzrI : e to nimitta badhuM bheguM thAya. nimitta vagara to nA thAya. nimitta maLe paNa te jJAnanuM nimitta nahIM. e to avaLuM nimitteya maLe. avaLuM nimitta maLe, to jJAna hAjara thaI jAya. ko'ka avaLuM karanAruM, herAna karanAruM maLe che, eTale ApaNe vicAramAM paDIe, vicAromAM peluM jJAnanuM lAITa thaI jAya. agara to koI sAdhu mahArAja pAse vAta sAMbhaLavA gayA, tyAM mahArAja vAta karatA hoya to manamAM ema vicAra Ave ke AvuM nA hoya, Ama hoya, e che te jJAna hAjara thaI jAya, ne lAITa thaI jAya. eTale nimitta maLIne pachI hAjara thaI jAya. praznakartA : e je bAkI eka-be janmo rahyA, enI aMdara A jAgRti ne A mArgadarzana... dAdAzrI : e to joDe rahevAnuM badhuM. A jAgRti, A jJAna badhuM ahIMthI jevuM chUTuM ne evuM ja tyAM hAjara thaI jaze. nAnI uMmaramAMthI ja lokane ajAyabI thAya evuM thaze. tethI kRpALudevane, emanI nAnI umaramAM che te A lakhI zakatA'tA ne badhuM. jo jJAna hAjara nA thatuM hoya to nAnI uMmaramAM karI zake nahIM. praznakartA : atyAre A avatAramAM akrama maLyuM che ane pachInA avatAramAM pachI kamikamAM javuM paDaze ke akrama ja raheze ? dAdAzrI : pachI rahyuM ja nahIMne ! AtmA prApta thaI gayo eTale thaI rahyuM, khalAsa ! pachI game te, badhuM nikAlI che. akrama maLo ke krama maLo, ene ApaNe levA-devA nathI. ApaNuM A jJAna hAjara ne hAjara raheze TheTha eka-be avatAra sudhI. praznakartA : dAdA, A bhavamAM to tamAruM jJAna maLyuM ane AjJA paNa maLI, to have AvatA bhavamAM e AjJA Apaze koI ke ApaNe laIne ja jaIzuM ke zuM thaze ? pUratI tamAre pALavI paDaze. sArI rIte pALazo to AvatA bhavamAM tamAre vaNAI gayelI haze. e tamAruM jIvana ja AjJApUrvaka haze ! praznakartA: te bIjA avatAre paNa atyAranI phAIlo pAchI sAthe Avaze ? dAdAzrI : phAIlo joDe pharI kakaLATa karyo haze to joDe Avaze, nahIM karyo hoya to nahIM Ave. javAze mahAvideha kSetre ! jene ahIM lakSa beThuM zuddhAtmAnuM, te ahIM AgaLa A bharata kSetre rahI zake ja nahIM, te sahejeya mahAvidehamAM kheMcAI jAya evo niyama che. ahIM A duSamakALamAM rahI zake ja nahIM. zuddhAtmAnuM lakSa nathI, te to badhA ahIM che ja. paNa jene lakSa beThuMne, te mahAvidehamAM eka avatAra ke be avatAra karI tIrthaMkaranAM darzana karIne mokSe cAlyo jAya evo sahelo-saraLa mArga che A ! praznakartA : ApaNe mahAvideha kSetranI aMdara jo janma levo che, to e maLI zake kharo ? dAdAzrI : hA, kema nA maLe ? badhA phorthavALAne ja phIphathamAM besADene ? pAsa thAya tene. evI rIte eka avatAra ahIMthI kSetra svabhAva laI jAya che mANasane. eTale cothA ArAne lAyaka svabhAva thAya te cotho Aro jyAM cAlato hoya, tyAM e kSetra ene kheMcI le ane cothA ArAmAM pAMcamA ArAne lAyaka jIvo hoya, tene A pAMcamo Aro tyAMthI kheMcI le. eTale tamAre sImaMdhara svAmI pAse besavAnuM ane tyAM AgaLa tamane A prApti thaI jaze. e chellAM darzana thAya. amArAthI UMcAM darzana e. ame traNaso chappana DigrIe, emanI traNaso sAITha DigrI, eTale tyAM e darzana thaze. e darzananI ja jarUra che have, eTale badhuM AvI gayuM. e darzana thAya eTale mokSa thAya. jAhojalAlI pAMca AjJA thakI ! ane badhI puNya evI baMdhAze ke tyAM mahenata nahIM karavI paDe. tyAM dAdAzrI : A AjJA A bhava pUratI ja che. pachI AgaLa AjJA tamArA jIvanamAM vaNAI gayelI haze, tamAre pALavI nahIM paDe. A bhava

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 423 424 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : e sTeja upara AvavuM paDe ne ? dAdAzrI : nA, paNa e AtmA sTejavALo ja che. niSpakSapAtIpaNe jovAnuM che. ApaNe joDe joDe pakSapAtamAM nA AvavuM joIe. saMDAsa javAnuM mahIM ApaNane khabara to tarata paDe, paNa joDe joDe pakSapAta eTale zuM ? ApaNe tyAM koI sonAno vepArI Avyo che ne, enI joDe vAtomAM rahyA kare eTale pachI zuM thAya te ? pelo sonA upara pakSapAta paDyo, eTale peluM saMDAsa javAnuM A tharmomiTara dekhADatuM hoya te baMdha thaI jAya pachI. nahIM to pakSapAta nA hoya, to AtmA tharmomiTara ja che, badhuM ja dekhADe evo che. to heya... taiyAra baMgalA-gADIo tyAM ja janma thAya ne tyAM AgaLa pachI e bhagavAnane tyAM mUkavA Avaze gADIomAM. A puNya evI baMdhAze. A amArI AjJA pALavAthI puNyAnubaMdhI puNya baMdhAze. jarAya mahenata nA karavI paDe. A to dhakkAmUkkI, A to kaMI avatAra kahevAto haze ? A to puNya kahevAtA haze? Ama vicAramAM AvyuM ke prabhu pAse javAno TAIma thayo. te ghaDiyALamAM jue te pahelAM to gADI AvIne UbhI rahI hoya ! eTale badhI ja taiyArI Ama haze AgaLa. mATe have tame amArI AjJA pALajo ane niraMtara samAdhi raheze, enI geraMTI ApuM chuM. mahAvideha kSetramAMthI pharI AvavAnuM hoya nahIMne ! pharI AvavAno rasto ja joyane ! rAga-dveSa karIe, to pharI AvavAnI zarUAta thAya. karmonA dhakkAno avatAra thAya, eka-be avatAra thAya vakhate, paNa te chevaTe pAchuM sImaMdhara svAmI pAse ja javuM paDaze. ahIM AgaLa hisAba bAMdhyo hazene ? pahelAMnAM kaMIka cIkaNA thaI gayelA, e pUrAM thaI jaze. praznakartA : ahIMyAM ? dAdAzrI : chUTako ja nahIMne ! A to raghA sonIno kAMTo che nyAya jabarajasta. cokhkho-pyora nyAya. ahIM cAle nahIM polaMpola. mokSamAM saba samAta ! kyAre javAtA mokSe ?! praznakartA : ApaNe mokSamAM javAnA chIe, e zI rIte khabara paDe ? dAdAzrI : nA, tenI utAvaLe ya zuM che ApaNane ? praznakartA : nA, utAvaLa to nathI, paNa khabara to paDe ne koI vakhate, daza janma pachI, vIsa janma pachI, so janma pachI..... dAdAzrI : badhuM khabara paDe. ApaNo AtmA chene tharmomiTara jevo che. bhUkha lAge te khabara nA paDe ? te saMDAsa javAnuM thAya, te tamane khabara paDe ke nA paDe ? badhuM ja khabara paDe. kyAM javAno che, teya badhuM khabara paDe. kayA kayA avatAramAM javAno che te ya khabara paDe. niSpakSapAtIpaNe joto nathI. praznakartA: tame to amane mokSanI geraMTI Apo cho, paNa mokSamAM jaIzuM tyAM Apa paNa mokSamAM hazone, tyAre e dAdAne kaI rIte oLakhIzuM ? dAdAzrI : pachI oLakhavAnI zI jarUra ? ahIM to oLakhANavALA hoya to upakAra mAnavo paDe. tyAM to mokSamAM oLakhANa nA hoya. eTale e ja barobara che. kAraNa ke mokSamAM samAnatA che. mokSa konuM nAma kahevAya ? mokSa eTale koI uparI nahIM ane koI aMDarahenDa nahIM. ahIM kema mokSa nathI thato ? tyAre kahe che, mArA uparI evA tIrthaMkara ahIM hota to khAlI darzana ja karata to mokSa thAta. eTaluM ApaNe tyAM taiyArI che. khAlI darzana ja, bhegA thaIne darzana thaI gayA, to mahIM pUrNAhuti thaI jAya. paNa che nahIM, have konA darzana karAvIe ? mUrti cAle nahIM. eTale tyAM gayA pachI darzana karavAthI ja mokSa che. ame chelle jaIzuM ! praznakartA : tame kahyuM ke mane mokSanI utAvaLa nathI, to AvuM kema ? dAdAzrI : mAre zI utAvaLa ? mane mokSa thayelo ja lAge che pachI. mokSa mATe kone utAvaLa hoya ke A du:khothI jaladI chUTavuM hoyane, te

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ekAvatArI mokSa, 'A' jJAnathI ! 425 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) utAvaLa kare. mAre to mokSa thayelo ja che. have mArI icchA che ke lokonuM kalyANa thAva. e pachI nirAMte jaIzuM. praznakartA : amane mokalIne ! dAdAzrI : hA, badhA jAya to sAruM, evI mArI icchA ! praznakartA : mahAvideha kSetra ane mokSa, have Ape ema kahyuM ke mokSamAM tamane pahelA mokalazuM. ame pachI jaIzuM. dAdAzrI : hA, pachI AvIzuM. praznakartA : e laghutama bhAva che Apano ? dAdAzrI : nA, laghutama bhAva nathI. amAruM kAma bAkI che vadhAre. praznakartA : keTalA vakhata karazo e kAma ? dAdAzrI : nA, e vAMdho nathI. mAre je rIte javAnuM chene, e sTezanane AvatAM vAra lAge evuM che. praznakartA : eTale amane vahelA mokalazo ? dAdAzrI : AmAM keTalAMka che te raheze, mArI joDe Avaze. evuM kaMI khoLavA jevuM nahIM, enI meLe zuM bane che e joyA karo ! praznakartA : paNa evI zaMkA karavAnI jarUrata nathI. dAdAzrI : zaMkA karavAnI jarUra nathI. A to kahevuM paDe. eTale pelo bephAma nA thaI jAya, ke amane kazuM naDavAnuM nathI have. cetatA to rahevuM paDene ! vakhate karma pAchaluM evuM hoya te pADe, toya pAchuM A jJAna ja tene UMce lAve. A jJAna to DUbelAne tAre evuM A jJAna che. batI vastune tAre. ane anubhava thayA pachI pelI vAta to samajAyane ! vijhA maLyA, TikTi bAkI ! praznakartA : dAdA, mahAvideha kSetramAM jaIzuM tyAre tIrthakarane to AMkhe dekhIzene ? dAdAzrI : hA, dekhavAnAM. emanI sAme ja besavAnuM. AMkhe dekhIne emanA sAme ja besavAnuM. emanA darzana karavA hAru ja, e udezathI ja tyAM javAnuM. mArI pAse e darzana rahyA nathI. haju kAcA che, A darzana. eTaluM phaLa, saMpUrNa nA maLe, pelAM to pUrNa darzana kahevAya. TikiTa kaDhAvI ? vijhA kaDhAvyo mahAvidehano ? ApaNA jJAnane sinsiyara rahevuM, enuM nAma vijhA. praznakartA ane TikiTa Ave eTale ? dAdAzrI : TikiTa Ave to enI vAta ja judI che. tamArI dazA tadana mArA jevI dazA AvIne UbhI rahe. kAraNa ke pachI Dakhala karanAro koI rahe nahIM. je moTuM thoDo vakhata bagaDI jAya che, moMDhA upara AnaMda jato rahe che koI vakhata, e tamArI pataMgane pelo kATa kare che ne eTale. chatAM pataMgano doro tamArA hAthamAM che. mArI pataMgane to kATa karanAruM ja koI nahIMne ! eTale tamAre evuM thaze eTale thaI rahyuM, TikiTa AvI gaI. A vijhA to AvI gayA, vijhA maLyA ! pAchA pharAya, mahAvidehathI ? praznakartA H dAdA, eka vakhata ApaNe mahAvideha kSetramAM halakA paramANuo thaI jAya ane tyAM jatAM rahIe, pachI pAchA paDavAnuM to nA thAyane ? dAdAzrI : ene to paDavuM hoya to game tyAM paDe, potAnI icchA nA hoya to bIjo koI nahIM pADe. A bIjAM pADatAM haze teya nahIM pADe tamane. potAnI icchA hoya to bIjA badhA pADe. tamArI potAnI icchA hoya to game tyAre, rAte kUvAmAM jaIneya paDe. ene zuM kahevAya ?

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428 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) [10] akrama vijJAnanI balihArI vijJAna eTale keza benka ! A badhuM pAchuM vijJAna che. vijJAna kone kahevAya ? je siddhAMtarUpe hoya. siddhAMta eTale virodhAbhAsa nA hoya. ane rokaDuM phaLa maLavuM joIe, udhAra nA cAle. Ama karyuM eTale bIje dahADe enuM phaLa maLavuM ja joIe. atyAre tame mArI joDe ahIM beThA cho, teya rokaDuM phaLa maLe. ahIMnuM je karo, e badhuM rokaDuM phaLa maLe, udhAra nAmeya nahIM, enuM nAma vijJAna kahevAya. have ahIMno eka dhakko tame khAva to tamane rokaDuM phaLa maLyA vagara rahe nahIM. A to vijJAna che, jyAMthI tame pakaDo tyAMthI tALo maLe. anaMta aMdhakArane ajavALyAM akrama vijJAne ! praznakartA : jJAna pAmyA pachI puNyazALI rahevAno ja chene ? dAdAzrI : AtmajJAna pAmavuM e to koI phero hotuM ja nathI. A to A pahelI vakhata AvuM jJAna pAme che. akrama vijJAna ja evuM che. A to vijJAna che te jJAna pAme. ane peluM kramika mArga to rileTiva jJAna che. ane A akrama vijJAna to kriyAkArI jJAna che. tame beThA hova, toya e mahIM kriyA karyA ja kare. nathI karatuM ? praznakartA : kare che. dAdAzrI : cetave che ke nathI cetavatuM ? praznakartA : cetave che. dAdAzrI : A to kriyAkArI jJAna che. A to akrama vijJAna che ane A nimitta ja judI jAtanuM che. bahu pheraphAra thayA e badhuM juone, A badhAM pheraphAra thayAne ? praznakartA : dAdAnI duAthI chellI ghaDIvALAneya baLa AvI jAya che. eTale sAro pheraphAra thaI jAya che, e zAthI ema ? dAdAzrI : hA. badhuM badalAI jAya che. A vijJAna ja evuM. vijJAnanuM baLa evuM che. badhA aMdhArAmAM Thokaro khAtA khAtA cAlatA'tA ane ko'ke Torca lAITa dharI te badhAyane Thokara vAgatI baMdha thaI gaI. evuM A vijJAna che. ane phAnasa dharIe to ko'ka be-traNa jaNane Thokara nA vAge ne bIjA badhAne vAge. paTaMtara pamADanArate sarvasva samarpaNa ! praznakartA : A AjJAo Ape je ApI, A jAgRti je Ape karAvI, emAM brahmAMDanA bhAvo samAyelA che. have ethI AgaLa kazuM kahevAnuM rahetuM nathI. dAdAzrI : tamAma zAstro, badhA Agamo, AmAM AvI gayA covIsa tIrthaMkaronuM bheguM vijJAna che A ! praznakartA: A amArA dilamAM je lAgyuM te Apane kahyuM sAheba, lo ! dAdAzrI : jenA thakI ApaNe paTaMtara pAmyA, tene sarvasva arpaNa karavAmAM khacakATa nA anubhavavo joIe. sarvasva arpaNa karajo, kahe che. jenAthI ApaNe paTaMtara pAmyA. zuM hatA ne zuM thaI gayA ! paraMtara jAtyAMtara kahevAya. ame pAMca AjJA ApIe chIe, te AjJA jeTalI pALo eTalo

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akrama vijJAnanI balihArI 429 430 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) akramamAM sAdhatA zI ? praznakartA H A sthaLamAMthI sUkSma ane sUkSmatara sudhI javA kevI rIte A prayoganI sAdhanA karavI ? lAbha. ochI pALo to jarA lAbha ocho rahe. paNa te krodha-mAna-mAyAlobha to jatAM ja rahe che. nabaLAIo e jatI rahe che, A to evuM che ke A jJAna prApta thayuM che, te pAMca abaja rUpiyA Apo toya A jJAna prApta thAya evuM nathI. pAMca lAkha avatAreya nA thAya, evuM eka kalAkamAM thAya che. AnI upara TAIma bagADavA jevuM nahIM. A vivaraNa karavA jevI cIja nhoya. dhIsa Ijha dha keza beMka opha DivAina solyuzana. keza beMkamAM ema nA kahevAya ke tamAro ceka pachI keTalA vAge Avaze ane keTalA vAge mane pemenTa maLaze, evuM tevuM kazuM kahevAya nahIM. A samajamAM Ave chene ?! ane keza beMka kahyuM eTale ApaNe samajI jaIe ke nA samajI jaIe ? kema lAge che tamane ? bIja pachI pUnamanA paMthe ! ahIM jJAna lIdhAM pahelAM niraMtara kAma karatuM hatuM paNa te jJAna adhogatimAM laI janAruM hatuM ane A jJAna paNa niraMtara kAma karyA ja kare che ane te mokSe laI janAruM che. Ane bhagavAne samakita kahyuM. ahIM jJAna lIdhAM pachI e UgI nIkaLe. bIje dahADe bIjanAM caMdramA jevuM ajavALuM dekhAya, paNa pachI pANI chAMTavuM paDe. ema ne ema satsaMgamAM AvIe nahIM to pachI kazuM vaLe nahIM. bahAragAma rahetA hoIe paNa toya pANI barobara chaMTAvI laIe to jhADa moTuM thAya. pachI kAyamanI zAMti vaLe ! dAdAzrI : kazI sAdhanA karavAnI che ja nahIM. tame pote ja mULa svarUpe sUkSmatama cho, pachI have zenI sAdhanA karavAnI ? ane have sthaLamAM javAnA nathI. cULa ne sUkSma e badhuM pudgalamAM rahI gayuM. eTale e phAIla thaI gaI. tame sUkSmatama thayA, have kazI sAdhanA karavAnI nahIM. sAdhanA to kramikamAM hoya. tame pote ja zuddhAtmA thaI gayA, have rahyuM zuM bAkI ? have AjJAmAM rahevAnuM che. A vijJAna che ane pUruM samajI lejo. kAraNa ke A baTanane badale peluM baTana dAbazo to ziyALAne dA'De paMkhA pharaze. saheja bhUla thaI ke pachI bUma pADazo ke are, TADhamAM marI gayo ! mUA, paNa baTana dAbavAmAM bhUla thaI A. eTale jarA samajI lejo. jhINavaTathI badhuM samajavA jevuM vijJAna che A ane tarata mukti phaLa Ape. AjathI ja mukti thaI gaI. parigrahanuM paribaLa akramamAM ! praznakartA : eTale jeTalI jAgRti vadhe teTalI ja pragati. dAdAzrI : jAgRtinI ja pragati che. jeTalI UMgha eTalI muzkelI. jAgRti vadhe kyAre, parigraha ocho thAya tyAre. jarUriyAta ochI thaI jAya tema jAgRti vadhe. praznakartA : parigrahanI vAta AvIne, to pachI kramikamAM ane akramamAM phera zuM ? akramamAM paNa parigraha ocho thavo joIe ? A parigraha jeTalo ocho eTalI jAgRti vadhAre, e kramikane paNa lAgu paDe ane akramane paNa lAgu paDe ? - dAdAzrI : akramamAM to kazuMya lAgu paDe nahIM, paNa akramamAMya che te akramano pUrepUro lAbha maLyo nA hoya ane pachI parigraha bahu hoya anAdinI amAsa hoya chene, tenA karatAM bIja thaI. bIjano caMdramA dekhAyo. have dhIme dhIme trIja thaze, cotha thaze. A badhuM amArA kahyA pramANe AjJAmAM rahezo, eTale vadhyA karaze. ane pUnama thAya eTale badhuM saMpUrNa thaI jAya che. mULa vastu 'A' prApta thaI ane mahIM AnaMda utpanna thayo. have dhIme dhIme jema bIja Uge chene, e pUnama thAya ane pUnama ne bIjamAM phera kharone ? e phejhijha badhA thayA kare. phejhijha opha dhI mUna. evI rIte A jJAnanA phejhijha. pUnama thaI eTale jANavAnuM pUruM thaI gayuM.

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akrama vijJAnanI balihArI 431 432 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) eTale pachI gUMcavAyelo raheto hoya ne ! parigraha ocho hoya, te chUTAM thaI jAya. akramano lAbha to pUro maLyo kyAre kahevAya ke game eTalAM parigrahonuM rAja hoya toya paNa Aya cAle ne teya cAle tyAre. enI vAta judI. paNa te to pAchAM jAtajAtanA mahIM UMdhA svabhAva bharyA hoyane lobhanA ne kapaTanA ne e badhAM. e locA vALane badhAM. jenuM hArTa oNra hoya tenI vAta judI ! A pyaoNriTIne lIdhe phAve ne ! tuM ja evo thaI jAne pyaoNra A bhavamAM. ApaNA doSa ApaNane dekhAya, koIne kahevuM ja na paDe tyAM sudhI pahoMcyA to bahu che. have doSa moDA dekhAya to ya vAMdho nahIM paNa e to potAne dekhAya. ko'kane kADhavA paDe tenA karatAM potAne dekhAya, enA jevuM to eke ya nahIM ne, svataMtra ! praznakartA : svataMtra eTale emAM paNa jAgRtinI ja vAta Ave ne, dAdAjI ? dAdAzrI : badhuM jAgRti ja che. jAgRti na hatI tene laIne to A loko AvA hatA. jAgRti ekadama vadhI gaI. jJAna lIdhA pachI eka dahADAmAM pheraphAra thaI gayo. praznakartA : caraNavidhi karIe chIe, e jAgRti mATe hoya che ? dAdAzrI : jAgRti vadhe enAthI. dahADe dahADe jAgRti vadhatI jAya. AvaraNa tUTatuM jAya ane jAgRti vadhatI jAya. bhUla to dekhADe tyAre khabara paDe chene ? praznakartA : keTalIka potAne khabara paDe. dAdAzrI : hA, paNa tane nA khabara paDatI hoya tyAre amAre dekhADavI paDene? e dekhADavAnI nA rahe tyAre vahelA-moDAM paNa potAne ja dekhAya eTalI pragati mAMDavAnI che. jJAtato apaco kyAre ? praznakartA: to pachI AtmAnI anubhUtinA AMtarika anubhava kevA thavA joIe ? dAdAzrI : A to AMtarika anubhava nahIM, AtmArUpa ja thaI jAya. niraMtara AtmA thAya. eka kSaNavAra bAkI nA hoya, evuM A badhAMne niraMtara rahe. AtmAno anubhava to ApaNane AvIne thoDIvAra pachI jato rahe, e anubhUti kahevAya. jema sAkara khAdhI ne pachI pAchuM moTuM gaLyuM nA hoya. khAdhI teTalo vakhata gaLyuM lAge. paNa eTalo anubhava thaI gayo ke bhaI, sAkara gaLI hoya che evuM. ane A to niraMtara anubhUti rahyA ja kare. A badhAMne niraMtara ja rahyA kare. eTale anubhUtinA sTezano pUchavAnI jarUra nahIMne ahIM AgaLa. niraMtara rahe pachI sTezana zenuM pUchavAnuM ?! te tamane evuM thaI jAya evuM karI lo. kAcA paDo te nA cAle e to. praznakartA : mAre e pUchavuM hatuM ke jJAnano apaco thAya ke nahIM ? dAdAzrI : e to amuka UMmaranA mANasone thAya. kAraNa ke jJAna pUruM samajyA nahIM eTale pachI pAcana thAya nahIM. eTale AkhuM jJAna pUrepUruM samajavuM joIene ! ahIM roja satsaMgamAM Avene, tene vAMdho nA Ave paNa A to ahIM satsaMgamAM nA Ave, tene arjINa thaI jAya ne pachI UMdhA raste cAlyuM jAya. akramamAM paDavAno bhaya ? praznakartA: have dAdA, kramikanI aMdara upara caDhato caDhato agiyAramethI nIce paDe to akramanI aMdara upara caDhatyA pachI paDavAno bhaya kharo ? dAdAzrI : nA. paNa Ano paDavAno bhaya ja nahIMne ! A to AjJAmAM rahe to pachI pADanAra koNa ? AjJA cUke to paDyo. nahIM to ahIM paDavA jevuM nathI. ahIM to AgaLa vadhe nahIM eTaluM ja. ahIM paDavAnuM sthAna ja nathI. kramika mArgamAM e che te mohane upazama karato karato AgaLa gayo hoya, kSaya karyA vagara, te tyAM badhAM upazAMta pariNAma thaI gayelAM hoyane, te bhagavAna thaI jAya. ane loka bhagavAna jevo mAne. pachI manamAM ema

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akrama vijJAnanI balihArI 433 434 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) thAya ke huM kaMIka chuM have. e pAchAM paDavAnI nizAnI. je moha kSaya karyA vagarano chene, te pachI phATe pharI. moha kSaya thaI javo joIe. cAritra mohanIya kSaya karavI paDe. tame che te phAIlono nikAla karone, te tame AjJA vAparI tyAMthI zuddha upayoga. jeTalo vakhata AjJAmAM rahe eTalo zuddha upayoga ja hoya. have chatAM AjJAmAM rahe ane te sAmAne doSita gaNe, ANe mAruM bagADI nAkhyuM A, e zuddha upayoga nA kahevAya. koI gunegAra ja nathI ! zuddha upayoganI draSTimAM koI gunegAra che nahIM jagatamAM. zubhAzubhanI draSTimAM gunegAra che. ahaMkAra sajIvata kyAre ? praznakartA koI mane kahe ke tame AvA cho, tevA cho, pAgala cho evuM kahe, to tenuM uparANuM nA levuM, rakSaNa nA karavuM. kahevuM ke ame to pahelethI ja AvA chIe. uparANuM lIdhuM ke rakSaNa karyuM to nirjIva ahaMkAra che te sajIva thaI jAya e vAta sAcI ? dAdAzrI : e sajIva thaI jato nathI, paNa uparANuM lIdhuM eTale ApaNe Dakho vadhAre karavo paDe. eTalI vakhata A uparANuM lIdhuM to AkhI rAta DakhAmAM jAya. e kahe ke tame kaho evA. to ukela AvI gayo. ApaNe ene zuM kahIe ke tame kaho cho evA chIe. ApaNe enI joDe plasa-mAInasa karavA jaIe to AkhI rAta paLojaNano niveDo nA Ave. eTale ApaNe kahIe ke tame kaho cho evA chIe. evI vAta karIe eTale phAIlano kaMIka nikAla thaI gayo ! praznakartA : nikAla thaI gayo, pachI ? dAdAzrI : pachI ApaNe zuM ? praznakartA : enI pAse ApaNe hAra kabUla karI lIdhI enuM zuM ? tame kaho cho evA chIe. dAdAzrI : je hAra kabUla kare che, ane pachI bIjuM karavAnuM rahyuM zuM? A to amArI rIta batAvI dIdhI. ame je rIte cAlyA te rIta. ane e jo pAMca AjJA cUkyo ke ahaMkAra sajIva thavA mAMDyo. A ahaMkAra sajIva thayo eTale pahelAM je mULa hatone tyAM AvIne Ubho rahyo. tame jo AjJA cako to e sajIva paNa thaI jAya, vAra nA lAgene ! ghaNAM lokone pAcho sajIva thaI gayone ! AjJA cUkyA, pAMca AjJA choDI do eTale badhuM sajIva thaI jAya. jeTalAe choDI dIdhuM che, ene sajIva thaI gayo cheya kharo. pAMca AjJA nahIM hoya to A tamAruM kusaMga khaI jaze. A cogaradama kusaMga che te tamArI ahaMkAranI nirjIvatAne AkhI khaI jaze. akramamAM lapasavAnA traNa sthAtako ! praznakartA: jJAna maLyA pachI saMsAramAM lapasI paDavAnA kyA sthAnako che? dAdAzrI : jJAna maLyA pachI saMsAramAM lapasI paDavAnI traNa ja vastu che. bIjuM badhuM khAjo-pIjo, kapaDAM paherajo, cazmA paherajo, sinemA jovA jajo, game te vastu khAjo, paNa eka mAMsAhAra karAya nahIM. bIjuM, brAMDIno chAMTo aDAya nahIM ane trIjuM, parastrI nahIM. parastrIno vicAra Ave to pratikramaNa karavuM. A traNa ja vastu paDavAnA sthAnaka che. bIjI kaMI vastu pADanArI nathI. paDavAnA eTale pharI ThekANuM nahIM paDe. eTalA hAru ame kahIe chIe ke amArI joDe Avazo nahIM ane Avazo to paDyA pachI hADakuM jaDe nahIM evuM che. A to bahu UMcAM-hAIlevala para jaIe, enA karatAM thoDe gayA hoya to paDI jAya to thoDA hADakAM to jaDe ! bIjA kazA paDavAnA bhayasthAnaka nathI. bIjuM to dhaMdhA-rojagAra karo, badhuM karo, cA pIvo teno vAMdho nathI. cA e iksijezana che, paNa toya pIvo to vAMdho nahIM. peluM kepha nA caDAvene ! A dArU pIvo to AtmA bebhAna thaI jAya eTale thaI rahyuM. pachI jJAna badhuM khalAsa thaI gayuM. pachI narkagati thAya enI ane para-strImAMya evuM. para-strIsaMbaMdhamAM niveDo nA thAya. A dArU saMbaMdhamAM niveDoya nA thAya. mAMsAhAra saMbaMdhamAM niveDoya nA thAya. noMdhI rAkhajo. paDavAnA sthAnaka gamatA nathIne ke game che ? pratyakSa jJAtIne pUchI pUchIne ja pragati ! A je rasto batAvyo e ja rasto che. je raste huM Avyo chuM, e

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akrama vijJAnanI balihArI 435 436 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) dAdAzrI : nA, huM kramikamAMthI Avyo chuM. praznakartA : eTale akramano anubhava Apane nathI, paNa akrama jJAne karIne Ape joyuM che ema Ape kaheluM. dAdAzrI : hA, barobara che. paNa A kramamAMthI kamAyelA chIe. ane udayamAM AvyuM akrama. paNa mahenata bahu karelI. praznakartA: eTale e tamArA anubhava judI jAtanA hoyane, dAdA ? dAdAzrI: paNa e to bahu lAMbA hoya. moTo itihAsa thAya badho. e kaMI be zabdomAM kahevAya evI vastu nathI. praznakartA : dAdA, pAMca AjJAmAMthI sauthI vadhAre kaI AjJA tamane anubhavamAM AvelI ? rasto meM tamane ApI dIdho che. mAro anubhavano ja rasto Apyo che. zAstramAM hoya nahIM A anubhavano rasto koI jagyAe. eka paNa zabda evo nathI zAstramAM ke je anubhavano rasto hoya, ne A kALanA lokone kAma lAge ! praznakartA : eTale Apa ghaNI vakhate kaho cho ke amArI hAjarImAM pratyakSa karI lo. dAdAzrI : e ja ame kahIe chene ke amArI hAjarImAM pratyakSa eTale, tamane tamAro anubhava thayo hoya, e tamAro anubhava gUMcAto hoya eTale amArA anubhavathI pUchI lo eTale tamAro anubhava gUMcAto nIkaLI jAya. e anubhava tamane phITa thaI gayo. basa e ja karI levAnuM che. amArI pAse anubhavano sToka che. tamAre anubhava thatAM Ave che have, A sAcuM ke te sAcuM e pUchI lIdhuM. eTale niveDo AvI gayo. praznakartA: basa, eTale je kaMI gUMcavaNa paDatI hoya ke je kaMI e thatuM hoya te ApanI pAse pUchI ane eno nikAla lAvI devo pachI ! dAdAzrI : hA, te rAtre pUchI lo, dahADe pUchI lo, eTa enI TAIma pUchI lo. evuM kaMI nathI hotuM bhaI, traNe vAge ja pUchavA. A mUhurtavALI cIja hoya. mUhurtavALI cIja bahAra, ahIM to rAte agiyAra vAgeya AvIne gUMcavaNano ukela badho pUchAya ! jJAta pahelAMnI dAdAnI anubhUtio.... AjJA pALe to niraMtara samAdhi rahe, mokSa ja varte ! A to amArI cAkhelI vastu ApI chene ! anubhavelI vastu ApI che ne ! praznakartA: Ape pAMca AjJA kevI anubhavI che ? dAdAzrI : A badhAe jevI rIte anubhavI evI rIte. emane pUchI jo jone, eTale khabara paDaze. praznakartA : Ape kaheluM ke Apa akramamAMthI nathI AvyA. dAdAzrI : vyavasthita vadhAre anubhavamAM AvelI. pahelethI vyavasthita lAvelo. tethI A pAMca AjJAmAM vyavasthitanI zodhakhoLa che. mULa zodhakhoLa amArI vyavasthitanI. nahIM to bhaviSyanI ciMtA vagaranuM A jagata ja nathI. ene agraloca kahevAya che. agnazoca eTale 'zuM thaze ?' AkhuM jagateya, A sAdhu-saMnyAsIo emAM che. enI ja ciMtAmAM hoya. e ciMtA, agraloca A vyavasthita UDADI melyuM. praznakartA : e UDADI mUke eTale badhA problema gayA ? dAdAzrI : badhA problema chUTI gayA ane pAchuM anubhavamAM AvyuM ke "nA, kharekhara vyavasthita ja che' evuM anubhavamAM AvyuM pAchuM. goThaveluM hoya to UDI jAya. praznakartA : pachI A pahelI be AjJA to Apane 1958 pachI, jJAna thayA pachI anubhavamAM AvI hazene ? dAdAzrI : hA, jJAna thatI vakhate anubhavamAM AvyuM. A zuM che ne A zuM che e anubhavamAM AvyuM !

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akrama vijJAnanI balihArI 437 438 AptavANI-12 (pUrvArdha) praznakartA : e pahelAM e be AjJAno kaMI khyAla kharo? dAdAzrI : A vyavahAra ne A nizcaya eTaluM samajamAM rahetuM hatuM. praznakartA H ekkekTanesa to pachI, jJAna thayuM te vakhate dekhAyuM ? dAdAzrI : e ja, jJAna vakhate ja anubhavamAM AvI gayuM. praznakartA : pachI phAIlono samabhAve nikAla... ? dAdAzrI : e to pahelethI karatAM ja AvyA hatA, jJAna na hatuM toye ! kRpALudevanuM vAMcatA hatA, te ukela ja lAvatA hatA ! te tadana samabhAve nikAla nahIM, paNa e sAdhAraNa eno taDajoDa karatA hatA, manamAM akaLAIne. manamAM akaLAIne TATuM pADI daIe. paNa A to ApaNuM 'samabhAve nikAla' to manamAM akaLAvAnuM nahIM ane kazuM nahIM. AzIrvAda ApIne cokhkhuM karavAnuM. praznakartA : A AzIrvAda ApIne samabhAve nikAlanI eka vadhArAnI vAta che ane Apano zuddhAtmAno copaDo kyArathI khUlyo ? dAdAzrI : jJAna thayuM te dahADAthI ja. praznakartA : dAdA, ame to tamArAM darzana karI karIne zuddhAtmAnA copaDAmAM rakama jamA karI. Ape kaI rIte karI ? dAdAzrI : zAnI jame karavAnI ?! eka ja dahADAmAM pragaTa thayuM tyAM ! gaI kAle 'e. ema. paTela' hatA ne Aje zuddhAtmA thaI gayA, draSTi mAtrathI. draSTiphera thaI gayone tyAM ! praznakartA: Apane eka ja kalAkamAM kevI rIte draSTi sajjaDa thaI gaI? dAdAzrI : kRpAthI zuM nA thAya ? bhagavAnanI kRpA Utare eTale zuM nA thAya ? praznakartA H amane to ApanI aMdara pragaTa thayA che te dAdA bhagavAnanI kRpA Utare. Apane kevI UtarI ? dAdAzrI : mAre kevI UtarI e zuM khabara paDe ? mane koIe pheravyo ! eTale huM baTa necarala kahuM chuMne !! dAdAnI hAjarInI anubhUti ! praznakartA : ApanI hAjarImAM vizeSa zAMti vartAya che. dAdAzrI : e to A hAjarInI to vAta ja judIne ! A to mArI hAjarI tamane dekhAya che, paNa mane jenI hAjarI dekhAya che te hAjarI tamane hau varte che. cauda lokano nAtha, AkhA brahmAMDano nAtha pragaTa thayo che aMdara, e maneya lAbha maLe che ane tamaneya lAbha maLe che. ATalI najIkatA(nikaTatA) joIe, basa. jeTalo najIka eTalo lAbha ane AjubAju vAtAvaraNa to sAruM rahe ja. emAM pAcho vAtAvaraNano phera ! paNa najIkano lAbha maLavAno ane te samajIne pAchuM, samajyA vagarano lAbha nahIM.. praznakartA : jyAre tIrthaMkaro vicaratA evuM vAtAvaraNa lAgyuM... dAdAzrI : vAtAvaraNa badhuM hAjarIthI cenja thaI jAya. paNa A tIrthaMkaranuM vAtAvaraNa to ankaperebala hoya. kampara ja nA karI zakAya. tIrthaMkarane deha hau bhagavAna ! buddhi baMdha to bhagavAna pUrNa pragaTe ! A dAdA bhagavAna hoya, mahIM je pragaTa thayA che, je AkhA brahmAMDano nAtha che te dAdA bhagavAna che ! tamArAmAMya e dAdA bhagavAna che, paNa pragaTa thayA nathI. e pUrNa prakAzamAM AvI javA joIe. have pUrNa prakAzamAM AvavA mAMDaze. have AmAM buddhi peThI ke bagADe. eTale buddhine kahIe, tuM tArI meLe saMsAranuM kAma karyA karuM chuM, e karyA karaje, bA. AmAM hAtha ghAlIza nahIM, kahIe. rileTiva badhuM tane sopyuM. riyala che te jJAnane soMpyuM. A jJAna kahevAya. jJAna tamane ApyuM, pachI vijJAna svarUpe thaze phUla pragaTa,

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akrama vijJAnanI balihArI 439 paraphekTa. atyAre tamArAmAM jJAna svarUpe che ja bhagavAna, e vijJAna svarUpa thaze ! te A vijJAna svarUpa thayelAM eTale e bhagavAna pada kahevAya. amAruM ApeluM jJAna, e to ekkekTa enI jagyAe che. tamane draSTigama jeTaluM thayuM eTaluM tamAruM. bIjuM draSTigama thayuM nathI. mULa svarUpe je jJAna ApeluM, e mULa svarUpanI tamane ekjhakTanesa haju AvI nathI pUrepUrI. tyAM sudhI vadhe che evuM lAge. nahIM to A jJAna to tenuM te ja che, mULa svarUpe ja che. paNa mULa svarUpe jayAre ekjhakTanesa Avaze tyAre pachI vadhaghaTa nahIM rahe pachI. A vadhaghaTa zuM che ? tamane je draSTi maLe che. te vadhe che dahADe dahADe. mULa svarUpe thavA mAMge che. jema ApyuM hatuM tema, te svarUpe thavA mAMge che. mahAtmAo bhagavAta thaIne raheze eka di' ! praznakartA : Ape je kahyuM ke amane badhAne tame bhagavAna banAvavA mAgo cho, e to jayAre banIe tyAre kharuM. atyAre nathI thayAne ? dAdAzrI : paNa e thaze kAraNa ke A akrama vijJAna che ! je banAvanAro che e nimitta che. ane banavAnI jene icchA che, e jyAre be bhegA thayA karaze, to e thaze ja ! banAvanAra kliyara che ane ApaNuM kliyara che, ApaNI dAnata bIjI nathI, eTale eka dahADo badhA aMtarAya tUTI jaze ne bhagavAna thaIne Ubho raheze, je ApaNuM mULa svarUpa ja che ! jaya saccidAnaMda