Naye Mandir Naye Pujari

Author(s): Sukhlalmuni
Publisher: Akhil Bharatiya Terapanth Yuvak Parishad
Catalog link: https://jainqq.org/explore/003159/1

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naye maMdira naye pujArI muni suravalAla STATESTANTS TONK MOVIE For

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nae maMdira : nae pujArI

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nae maMdira ; nae pujArI .. lekhaka : muni sukhalAla yavA prakAzana

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prakAzaka : akhila bhAratIya tarApatha yuvaka pariSad lADanUM, 341306 prathama saMskaraNa : 1681 artha saujanya : zrI dIpacanda bhUrA nokhA kI suputrI zrImatI suvaTI devI surANA dharmapatnI sva0 zrI mUlacanda surANA ( rAsIsara ) mUlya : pA~ca rupae mudraka : Ara0 ke0 bhAradvAja priTarsa, dillI

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bhUmikA bahuta varSoM pahale jabaki aNuvrata Andolana zurU huA hI thA maiMne aNuvrata bhAvanA para eka kahAnI likhI thii| maiM use lekara khuzI-khuzI AcArya zrI tulasI ke pAsa gayA / apane vyasta samaya meM bhI AcArya zrI ne na kevala use dekhA-sunA hI apitu mujhe puraskRta bhI kiyaa| yaha bhI kahA hamAre dharmasaMgha meM isa vidyA meM likhane meM tUne pahala kI hai, isase maiM prasanna huuN| maiM nahIM jAnatA vaha kahAnI kitanI sazakta thI para itanA taya hai ki AcArya zrI ke isa vAtsalya bhAva se mujhe gaharI preraNA prApta huii| lekhana kI dizA meM bar3hane kA saMbhavata: vaha merA pahalA caraNanyAsa thaa| usake bAda sAhitya kI aneka dhArAoM meM mujhe bahane kA maukA milaa| mujhe aisA to lagatA hai ki maiM kisI eka vidyA meM pUrI taraha nahIM uttara pAyA phira bhI AcArya zrI kA AzIrvAda mere sAtha rahA hai| merI kahAniyoM kI prastuta pustaka 'naye maMdira: naye pujArI, usI AzIrvAda kA pratiphala hai|| jaina AcAryoM ne kathA sAhitya para bahuta gaharA aura vyApaka kArya kiyA hai| vizeSajJa loga mAnate haiM ki mAnavIya utkarSa kI dRSTi se vaha bahuta mUlyavAn hai / purAne jamAne meM cUMki kahAnI sunane kA hI viSaya thI isalie usameM ghaTanAtmaka mor3a aura camatkAra Avazyaka thA / Aja kahAnI sunane kI apekSA par3hane kA viSaya jyAdA bana gaI hai isalie usameM manovaijJAnikatA jyAdA A gaI hai| maiMne ina donoM ke bIca se apanI rAha banAne kI koziza kI hai / aNuvrata, yuvAdRSTi, kathAloka, jainabhAratI, jaina jagat Adi aneka patra-patrikAoM meM merI kahAniyAM chapatI rahI haiN| apane mitra munizrI madhurakara jI kI preraNA se maiMne ise pustaka ke rUpa meM saMgrahIta kara diyA hai| AzA hai mere samAna dharmA pAThaka na kevala isase saMtuSTa hI hoMge apitu lAbhAnvita bhI hoNge| 4 julAI muni sukhalAla aNuvrata-vihAra naI dillI

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m K G 6 30 6 0 0 0 // W vI anukrama 1. saMketoM kI bhASA 2. risate ghAva 3. bhUla 4. kamIzana 5. dUsarA pahala 6. tIsarA aparAdha 7 bacata kI Adata 8. anukaraNa 6. naye maMdira : naye pujArI 10. bandhana aura mukti 11. sImA-vivAda 12. sabhyatA ke dAvedAra 13. anyAya kA paisA 14. pratikriyA 15. punarAvRtti 16. parivartana 17. kAnUna kI mauta 18. bAsI Tukar3oM kA puNya 16. vivazatA 20. garIbI haTAo 21. hiMsA kI tasvIra : ahiMsA kA phema 22. sArvajanika jIvana 23. mAM phaleSu kadAcana 24. Aga aura AMsU 25. eka patthara eka AdamI 26. tAbUta 70 0 0 101 OM ~ 115 116 124 123

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saMketoM kI bhASA sAvana kA mahInA thaa| AkAza bAdaloM se bharA thA / rimajhima-rimajhima varSA ho rahI thii| prAkRtika dRzya bar3A hI manorama thaa| eka ora harI-bharI pahAr3I thI, dUsarI ora kala-kala karatI barasAtI nadI baha rahI thii| cAroM ora choTe-choTe khela lahalahA rahe the| kisAna bar3e khuza naz2ara A rahe the / isa sAla kaI varSoM bAda bharapUra varSA huI thii| sAre bAMdha bhara gaye the| rabI kI phasala kA bhI acchA andAz2a laga rahA thaa| abhI bhI phasaleM kAphI UMcI A gaI thii| isI AzvAsana se sAre loga sukha kI nIMda so rahe the| kucha gar3ariye apanI bher3oM ko lie nadI ke kinAre baiThe the| unheM usa pAra jAnA thA, para nadI meM pAnI var3ha jAne ke kAraNa unheM isI pAra ruka jAnA par3A / isI bIca rAta ko 12 baje acAnaka nadI meM pAnI bar3hane lgaa| gar3ariyoM ne pahale to apanI bher3oM ko surakSita sthAna para haTAnA cAhA, para pAnI kA vega itanA teja thA ki usake Age khar3e rahanA kaThina ho gayA, balki kucha bher3eM to pAnI meM baha bhI giiN| isIlie ve pAsa vAle gAMva meM sahAyatA ke lie daur3e / gAMva ke logoM ko jagAyA aura unase apanI bher3eM bacAne kA Agraha kiyA, para isa svArthI duniyA meM kauna kisakI sunatA hai ! kucha logoM ne to unakI bAta para dhyAna hI nahIM diyaa| kucha loga unakI dInatA bharI prArthanA para pighale, para jaba taka ve gAMva ke bAhara Aye taba taka bAr3ha pUre vega meM A gaI thii| ataH sambhava nahIM rahA ki bher3oM ko bacAyA jA sake / Adhe ghanTe meM 5000 bher3oM meM se kevala 30-35 bher3oM ko hI bacAyA jA skaa| yahI ganImata thI ki gar3a riyoM kI jAna vaca gii|

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10 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI para parezAnI kI bAta yaha nahIM thI / bAr3ha kA pAnI kSaNa-kSaNa bar3hatA jA rahA thaa| eka lahara AtI aura eka sAtha do-do phuTa pAnI phaila jAtA / phira dUsarI lahara AtI aura usase bhI bhayaMkara dRzya upasthita kara detI / aura, aba to bAr3ha kA pravAha gAMva meM bhI A cukA thA / Dhola 1 ne zurU ho gaye / ekAeka AdhI rAta ko khatare kA saMketa sunakara loga jAga gaye | ghara se bAhara nikale to patA lagA ki bhayaMkara bAr3ha A gaI hai / kucha logoM ko abhI taka vizvAsa bhI nahIM ho rahA thA ki UMcAI para base unake gA~va meM bhI bAr3ha A sakatI hai / zAyada kisI ne aisI sthiti nahIM dekhI thI / Upara ke bAMdha tar3Atar3a TUTa rahe the / isI se pAnI kA yaha akalpita vega A gayA thA / use rokane ke lie pravAha ke Age patthara DAle gae / kATha ke bar3e-bar3e paTTe DAle gae, para saba kucha bekAra gayA / logoM ne socA, zAyada indradeva kA prakopa hai, ataH unako prasanna karane ke lie tatkAla homa kiyA gayA / nadI kI bhI pUjA-AratI kI gaI, para saba bekAra ! prati kSaNa pAnI bar3ha rahA thA / gA~va meM bhagadar3a maca gii| kacce makAna dhar3Adhar3a dharAzAyI ho rahe the / logoM kI AMkhoM meM AMsU A gaye the / unakI janma-bhara kI kamAI gharoM meM hI raha gaI thI, para Ane vAlI vipatti ke kSaNa kI kalpanA karake AMsU sUkhane lage / jidhara bhI surakSA kA AbhAsa huA, daur3a-daur3a kara ekatra ho gaye / mAM kahIM thI to usakA dUdhamuhAM baccA kahIM; pati kahIM thA to patnI kahIM ! kisI ko kisI kA patA nahIM cala rahA thA / sAre parivAra chinna-bhinna ho rahe the / sAre loga apanI hI cintA meM ghula rahe the / bAz2Ara meM pandraha phuTa pAnI car3ha AyA thaa| kucha makAna to bilkula pAnI meM DUba cuke the / nadI kA vega abhI bhI kama nahIM huA thA / USA kAla ke dhuMdhale se ujAle meM logoM ne dekhA, cAroM ora lAzeM - hI - lAzeM taira rahI haiM / kahIM kisI mAM kI lAza mare hue bacce ko apanI chAtI se cipakAe baha rahI hai, kahIM koI mRta sundarI gahane-kapar3e pahane hue baha rahI hai to kahIM kisI AdamI kI lAza dhana kA DibbA apanI chAtI se lagAye baha rahI hai / kisI kA mRta zarIra naMga-dhar3aMga baha rahA hai| jAnavaroM kI to koI galatI hI nahIM thI / bar3e-bar3e vRkSa tinake kI bhAMti bahate jA

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saMketoM kI bhASA | 11 rahe the| pAsa-pAsa hara jagaha lAzoM se aTI par3I thii| raha-raha kara koI karNa-bhedI cItkAra kalejA cIra jAtI thii| sArA gAMva khaMDahara bana gayA thaa| sirpha do-tIna pakke makAna aura maMdira hI bace the| unhIM meM saba loga kAMpate hue zaraNa pA rahe the| kucha loga jo pahAr3I kI ora bhAga jAne meM saphala ho gaye, ve to alabattA Azvasta the, para jo makAnoM aura maMdiroM kI zaraNa liye hue the, pala-pala unakA khatarA bar3hatA jA rahA thaa| kabhI unakI koI dIvAra DhahatI thI, to kabhI koI gokhar3A / unheM laga rahA thA ki Aja bacane kI koI AzA nahIM hai| saba eka-dUsare se kSamA mAMga rahe the| sabhI loga tanmaya hokara bhagavAna se prArthanA kara rahe the| prabho ! hameM Aja-Aja bacA do, itane dina hamane aneka anyAya kie haiM / ApakA bhajana nahIM kiyaa| isa bAra baca gaye to ApakI bhakti krege| jIvana ko naye sire se nyAyapUrvaka jiieNge| kucha loga mana-hI-mana apane pApoM ko yAda kara unakA prAyazcitta kara rahe the| sArA vAtAvaraNa dharmamaya ho rahA thA / pakke nAstika bhI pakke Astika naz2ara Ane lage the, para unakA dhyAna phiraphira kara bhagavAna se haTakara apane prANa para A TikatA thaa| seTha phatahalAla jI ke ghara meM bhI ATha phuTa pAnI bar3ha cukA thaa| eka maMjila pUrI pAnI meM DUba cukI thii| dUsarI maMjila para unake apane parivAra tathA Asa-pAsa ke 30-35 strI-puruSa 'jAti-pAMti kA bheda-bhAva bhUlakara kandhe se kandhA saTAkara eka hI kamare meM khar3e hue the| kucha loga mauna the aura kucha pralaya kI kalpanA ko satya batA rahe the| cAroM ora pAnI ke sivAya aura kucha bhI naz2ara nahIM A rahA thA / lagatA thA ki basa Aja hI pralaya ho jaaegii| isI bIca lagabhaga tIna baje eka kabUtara bhIgatA huA seTha jI ke kamare meM ghusaa| ghusate hI vaha aceta ho gayA aura seTha jI ke pairoM meM A girA / seTha jI ke dayA hRdaya para eka mArmika coTa lgii| cAroM ora mauta ke isa naMge dRzya meM bhI yadi koI hRdaya pighalatA nahIM hai,to use manuSya nahIM yama hI samajhanA cAhie / yadyapi seTha jI svayaM mauta se jUjha rahe the, para na jAne usa anajAna paMchI ke prati kauna se janma kI mamatA ubhara aaii| unheM AbhAsa huA yaha kabUtara koI sAmAnya kabUtara nahIM hai| koI devadUta

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12 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI hI kabUtara kA rUpa lekara unheM kucha kahane AyA hai / isI bhAva se unhoMne kabUtara ko apane hAthoM para uThA liyaa| seTha jI ke zarIra kI garmI pAkara thor3I dera meM usakI cetanA loTane lgii| usane AMkhe kholI, apane paMkha phdd'phdd'aaye| mauta ke isa kahara ke bIca khuzI kI lahara daur3a gii| seTha jI ne bhagavAna ko dhanyavAda diyA ki unhoMne unheM eka bujhate hue dIpaka meM tela DAlane kA avasara diyaa| phira unhoMne kabUtara ko kucha dAne DAle, para vaha aba bhI thara-thara kAMpa rahA thaa| kucha sardI se aura kucha anajAna logoM se ghirakara vaha bhayabhIta ho rahA thaa| na jAne vaha kitanI dUra se ur3akara AyA thA ? na jAne usake mana meM apane parivAra ke prati kyAbhAva A rahe the ? seTha jI ne use prema se dulArA, use pyAra bhare zabda kahe / zAyada kabUtara unakI bhASA ko na samajha pAyA, para prema kI bhASA ko samajha gyaa| thor3I dera meM vaha bilkula nirbhaya ho gyaa| usakI prANazakti lauTa AI / vaha dAne bhI cugane lgaa| eka kSaNa ke lie sabakA dhyAna mRtyu se haTakara jIvana para kendrita ho gyaa| .. bAhara abhI bhI mauta usI tAla meM nRtya kara rahI thI, balki usakA DarAvanA rUpa kucha gaharA hI huA thaa| bAz2Ara meM 20 phuTa pAnI car3ha gayA thaa| seTha jI ke dumaMjile ko bhI pAnI chUne lagA thaa| sabhI loga apane pUrvakRta kRtyoM kA smaraNa kara rahe the| eka-dUsarA khule hRdaya se apane antarmana kI vyathA prakaTa kara rahA thaa| sArI gandagI mAno dhulakara sApha ho gaI thii| itane meM lagabhaga cAra baje phurra se kabUtara ur3a gyaa| do-eka kSaNa ke lie saba vyakti Azcarya cakita ho gaye / seTha jI bhI avAk raha gaye / unakI AMkheM phailakara Upara car3ha gaIM, muMha khula gayA, hAtha phaila gae. para bahuta zIghra hI ne Atmastha ho gye| saMyata svara meM unhoMne kahAbasa, aba hameM avilamba isa makAna se bAhara nikala jAnA cAhie / yadyapi bAhara aba bhI nanhIM nanhIM bUMdeM par3a rahI thIM, para seTha jI ne jarA bhI pratIkSA gahIM kii| ve sabase pahale khulI chata para bAhara nikala aae| dhIre-dhIre zeSa loga bhI bAhara Ane lge| kucha logoM ko yaha seTha jI kI sanaka-sI lagI, para isa kSaNa saba kucha itane bhAvAtmaka DhaMga se ghaTita ho rahA thA ki eka-eka kara saba loga bAhara nikala Aye / antima AdamI

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saMketoM kI bhASA | 13 ke Ane meM thor3A vilamba huA, para Azcarya kI bAta thI ki jyoM hI usane apanA paira bAhara rakhA, yakAyaka vaha makAna Dhaha pdd'aa| nikalatenikalate usa para kucha miTTI gira par3I,para hAtha khIMcakara use bAhara nikAla liyA gyaa| sabhI loga kabUtara kI isa sAMketika bhASA ko samajhane kA prayAsa kara rahe the|

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risate ghAva sabjI maNDI se eka TAMgA (rer3A) sabjiyA~ bhara kara A rahA thaa| sAta-ATha AdamI bhI usa para baiThe the| ghor3A bilkula mariyala sA thA, para phira bhI tAMge vAlA cAbuka mAra-mAra kara use daur3Ae jA rahA thA / pula miThAI taka Ate-Ate vaha jarA TiThaka gyaa| usane dekhA sAmane nIlI pagar3I vAle (berahamI ke) kucha pulisa khar3e haiN| tA~gevAlA tatkSaNa nIce utara kara dUsare logoM se bhI nIce utarane kA Agraha karane lgaa| eka AdamI ne pUchA-kyau~, kyA bAta hai ? usane batAyA--sAmane nIlI pagar3I vAle pulisa khar3e haiN| tAMge meM jyAdA bhAra dekhegeM to merA galAna kara degeM ataH jaldI-jaldI nIce utara jaao| sabhI nIce utara aae| para jaisI ki AzaMkA thI tAMge ke pula para pahuMcate hI pulisa ne use roka liyaa| ghor3e ko dekhakara bolA-kitanA sAmAna lAda rakhA hai ? tAMge vAlA-sAhaba ! yaha to Apake sAmane hI hai| pulisa-jAnate ho sAr3he sAta mana se jyAdA bojha lAdanA gairakAnUnI tAMge vAlA--sAhaba ! bahuta jyAdA to nahIM hai| pulisa-to phira kyA bIsa mana lAdanA cAhate the ? paMdaraha mana to bojha lAda rakhA hai itane sAre AdamI baiThe the so alg| tuma koI AdamI ho yA rAkSasa / lagate to bhale se ho, para ho kasAI se bhI jyAdA nirdyii| vaha to eka bAra meM hI mAra detA hai| tuma ise tila-tila jalAkara maaroge| __ tA~ge vAle ne hAtha jor3akara kahA-sAhaba ! kyA karU ? kisI taraha gujArA to karanA hI hotA hai| basoM aura TampuoM ke ho jAne ke bAda

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risate ghAva | 15 ina tAMgoM ko kauna pUchatA hai ? subaha ke samaya meM hI do paise ho jAte haiM, phira to dinabhara khAlI baiThA rahatA huuN| Aja kucha bojha jyAdA ho gayA hai / mApha karo / Age kabhI itanA bojha nahIM laadNgaa| ___ pulisa ke mukhiyA ne AMkhe nikAlate hue kahA-tuma vevakUphoM ko cAhe kitanA hI samajhAo akla AtI hI nhiiN| roja kahate ho aisA nahIM karUgA, para karate sadA aisA hI ho / yadi sarakAra dhyAna na de to tuma loga kisI paza ko jindA hI nahIM chor3o'. aura vaha ghor3e kI pITha dekhane lgaa| roja-roja jIna rakhane se usake ghAva ho rahe the| thor3A thor3A khUna bhI usameM se nikala rahA thaa| bolA-dekho, yaha kyA ho rahA hai ? ghor3e ke sthAna para tumheM jotA jAe to patA cale ki darda kyA cIja hotI hai| tAMge vAlA- are bAbA ! maiM to ladA huA huuN| gRhasthI kI gAr3I meM akelA huuN| bAla-baccedAra AdamI huuN| roja sAta peTa khAne ke lie taiyAra rahate haiN| unameM kucha na DAla to kaise kAma cale ? paidA kucha hai nahIM ; maMhamAI ne kamara tor3a rakhI hai / kisI taraha udhAra le kara yaha tAMgA kharIdA hai| use bhI aba tuma mata calAne do| pulisa-hama tAMgA calAne se manA karate haiM ? saba loga calAte haiM, tuma bhI claao| Aja kala to tuma loga khUba paisA pITa rahe ho| (dhIme) kucha hamAre cAya-pAnI kA bhI to vyavasthA kro| tAMge vAlA- sAhaba ! mere gale kI saugandha jo paisA jur3a rahA ho| subaha-zAma sadA sira para savAra rahatI hai| aba ApakI kyA byavastha karU? yaha eka aThannI jeba meM hai, ise tuma lelo| pulisa-hU''ATha AnA ? jAnate ho, cAlAna ho gayA to kitane ATha Ane bharane par3eMge ? tAMge vAlA pulisa ke pairoM meM gira pdd'aa| kahane lagA-mujha garIba ko mata staao| mere pAsa isase jyAdA kucha bhI nahIM hai / ghara para bacce bImAra hai| cAlAna ho gayA to mara jaauugaa| pulisa-isalie to hama tumase kaha rahe hai / tAMge vAlA--para kyA karUM ? mere pAsa isase jyAdA kucha bhI nahIM hai / pulisa--hamane tumhAre jaise bahuta dekhe haiN| paTTe paise se jebeM bhare rahate

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16 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI haiM, phira bhI kahate haiM ki hamAre pAsa kucha nahIM hai| tAMge vAlA-bAbA ! jo kucha ho tumhArA / merI talAzI lelo| itane meM kucha loga ikaTThe ho ge| pulisa ne mAmale ko sameTate hue tAMge kA muha mor3a liyaa| tAMge vAlA bicArA bahuta gir3agir3AyA, para pulisa para usakA koI prabhAva nahIM pdd'aa| thAkhira cAlAna ho gyaa| sabjI vAloM ne apanI sabjI nIce utAra lii| ghor3A pazu-cikitsAlaya meM calA gyaa| tAMge vAlA bicArA rotA raha gayA / use Adeza milA ki tIna dinoM bAda korTa meM hAjira ho jaae| ghor3e ke abhAva meM tAMgevAlA khuda tAMge meM juta kara use khIMcane lgaa| mana meM gussA, apamAna, cintA Adi umar3a rahe the| vaha yaMtra kI taraha besudha hokara cala rahA thA ki itane meM pIche se eka skUTara kI Takkara lagI aura usakA kandhA chila gayA, usameM se khUna bahane lgaa| pIr3A se karahAte hue vaha apane ghara kI ora cala rahA thaa| ghara Ate hI khUna se raMge kapar3e dekha kara patnI ne kahA-yaha kyA kara Ae ho? ghor3A kahAM hai ? tAMge vAle ke muMha se eka hI zabda nikalA-cAlAna; aura vaha phUTaphUTa kara rone lgaa| patnI ne use r3hAr3hasa bNdhaayaa| kapar3e bdle| usake bAda aura do dinoM taka vaha khATa para par3A rhaa| tIsare dina korTa meM jAnA Avazyaka thaa| kyoMki yadi vaha nahIM jAtA to ghor3e kA hAtha se nikala jAnA spaSTa thaa| ata: vaha jaise taise kara majisTreTa ke sAmane hAjira huaa| pulisa ne sArA mAmalA majisTreTa ke sAmane prastuta kiyaa| tAMge vAlA bicArA kucha nahIM bola sakA aura usa para pacAsa rupaye phAina ho gae, yaha sunate hI usakI AMkhoM meM AMsU chalaka Ae aura apane kandhe para se kapar3A haTAte hue bolA-sAhaba ghor3e kI pITha para ghAva ho jAne para use to kisI aspatAla meM bhI bhejA jA sakatA hai, para kyA manuSya kI pITha para ghAva ho jAne para use kisI aspatAla bhejane kA prabandha hai ? aura eka hI sAtha usane apanI sArI sthiti kA citra korTa meM khIMca diyaa| sAre loga kSaNa bhara ke lie vismita se ho gae / majisTreTa ne dekhA ki usakA ghAva risa rahA hai, para kAnUna kI dhArAoM ke sAmane vaha parAsta thaa| ataH phAina meM koI bhI riyAyata nahIM ho skii| ghAva risatA hI raha gyaa|

Page #18
bhUla khelate-khelate mAdhurI aura maheza apane kvArTara ke sAtha lagI bagiyA meM cale ge| dopahara kA samaya thaa| bhayaMkara garmI par3a rahI thii| sabhI loga aMdara kvATara meM vizrAma kara rahe the, para mAdhurI aura maheza ke bacapana ko garmI kahA~ chU sakatI thI ? skUla se Ane ke bAda unheM khilA-pilAkara unakI mammI suzIlA bhI ArAma karane lagI thii| sote hI usako nIMda A gaI, para mAdhurI aura maheza ko nIda kahA~ AtI? yadyapi mammI ne unheM so rahane ke lie kar3I hidAyata kara dI thii| ata: ve eka bAra leTa bhI ge| kucha dera sone kI koziza bhI kI, para nIda nahIM AI to unhoMne AMkhoM hI AMkhoM meM izAre karane zurU kara die / thor3I dera meM maheza uTha kara dabe pAMva bAhara nikala gayA / mAdhurI bhI uThakara cupacApa usake pIchepIche bAhara A gii| donoM khelate-khelate bagiyA meM A ge| ___bagiyA meM ghAsa kA kAlIna bichA huA thaa| gamaloM meM kucha kekTAsa lage hue the, kucha camelI jhAr3a lage hue the, bhAMti-bhAMti kI latAeM lagI huI thii| kucha oma ke per3a lage hue the| eka gulAva kA paudhA lagA huA thaa| usa para eka hI phUla AyA huA thA / mAdhurI ne use dekhA aura bar3e pyAra se use sahalAte hue kahA--ahA, kitanA sundara hai yaha phUla ! maheza ne use sUMghate hue kahA-ahA ! kaisI mIThI hai isakI sugandha / kala meM ise apane koTa ke rojahAla meM lagAkara skUla jaauuNgaa| sAre lar3ake merI hI ora dekheNge| mAdhurI ne kahA-garmI meM kahIM koTa pahanate haiM ? ise to kala meM apanI coTI meM lgaauuNgii| hamArI misa hamezA apanI coTI meM aisA hI phUla lagAkara AtI haiM / mujhe bar3A acchA lagatA hai| ___

Page #19
18 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI maheza : nahIM, tU coTI meM kaise lagAegI ! ise to maiM apanI kamIja meM lgaauuNgaa| lomar3I kI pUMcha jaisI to terI coTI hai| usameM yaha itanA bar3A phUla kyA acchA lagegA ? mAdhurI : hamArI kitAba meM likhA hai, lar3akiyAM apanI coTI meM phUla lagAtI haiN| maheza : aisA hai to tU camelI kA sapheda phUla lagA lenaa| hamAre DrAiMga mAsTara kahate haiM ki kAle para sapheda raMga bahuta acchA khilatA hai| tere kAle bAloM para bhI camelI kA sapheda phUla bar3A acchA lgegaa| mAdhurI : nahIM, nhiiN| camelI kA phUla tU apanI zarTa meM lagA lenaa| gulAba kA phUla to maiM apanI coTI meM hI lgaauuNgii| maheza : tU kaise lagAego ? maiM subaha uThate hI ise tor3akara chipA duuNgaa| tava tU phira (aMgUThA dikhAkara) yaha lgaanaa| mAdhurI : tU aisA karegA to maiM Aja zAma ko hI ise tor3a luuNgii| phira tU dekhate rhnaa| yoM takarAra karate-karate donoM Age bar3ha ge| gulAba pIche chUTa gayA aura thor3I dera meM ve eka Ama ke per3a ke nIce A ge| aba ve Ama kI bAteM karane lge| bAteM kyA karane lage, apanI sUrata bigAr3a-bigAr3a kara Ama khAne kA abhinaya karane lge| mAdhurI ne kahA ki maiM do Ama khaauuNgii| maheza ne kahA-maiM cAra Ama khaauuNgaa| mAdhurI : maiM dasa khaauuNgii| maheza : maiM sau khAUMgA mAdhurI : maiM sAre Ama khaauuNgii| maheza : tumase sAre Ama khAe jAte haiM ? itane Ama khAne se tumako dasta nahIM lagane lagegI? mAdhurI : tU sau khAegA to tujhako dasta nahIM lageMgI? maheza : para maiM to dhIre-dhIre khaauuNgaa| mAdhurI : to phira maiM bhI dhIre-dhIre nahIM khAlUMgI ? kucha pApA ko bhI duuNgii| thor3e se tumako bhI de duuNgii|

Page #20
bhUla | 16 yoM eka ke bAda eka na jAne kitanI bAteM ho gii| phira to ve ghara vApasa bhI cale aae| apanA-apanA homa varka kiyA, khAe-pie aura khelekuude| isI taraha zAma ho gii| mammI ne unheM batAyA ki Aja jaldI taiyAra ho jaao| Aja hameM sinemA dekhane jAnA hai| ataH ve jaldI hI nahA-dhokara taiyAra ho ge| mammI ne bhI snAna kiyaa| apanI coTI guuNthii| phira usameM gulAba kA phUla lagAne ke lie bagiyA meM AI, para use bar3A Azcarya huA jaba gulAba ke paudhe para koI phUla hI nahIM dikhAI diyaa| garmI ke mausama meM yoM hI phUla kama hote haiM / usabha bhI eka mAtra phUla gAyaba dekhakara mammI jhallA gii| mana hI mana kahane lagI - roja phUla nahIM lagAtI / kabhI-kabhAra jaba bAhara jAne kA kAma par3atA hai, to zauka AtA hai| kala to eka phUla dikhA thA, para ye chokare phaloM ko kahAM Tikane dete haiM / usane gusse meM hI maheza ko AvAja do--maheza, o maheza ! eka vinIta bacce kI taraha maheza jhaTa mammI ke sAmane Akara khar3A ho gyaa| mammI ne pUchA-are, yaha gulAba kA phUla kahAM gyaa| acAnaka maheza ko dopahara kI mAdhurI kI bAta yAda A gii| usane socA, sacamuca mAdhurI ne hI phUla tor3A hogA / vaha bar3I badamAza hai| use zikSA dene ke lie vaha bola par3A-mammI ! phUla to mAdhurI ne tor3A hai| mammI jhallAI huI to thI hI ata: binA kucha vizeSa pUcha-tAcha kie aMdara A gaI / saMyoga se mAdhurI daravAje para hI khar3I thii| mammI ne kucha kahA na sunA, mAdhurI ko eka thappaDa jar3a diyaa| mAdhurI ko bicArI ko patA hI nahIM calA ki use yaha thappar3a kA upahAra kyoM milA; vaha hakkI-bakkI sI dekhatI raha gii| mammI aMdara calI gaI / itane meM maheza aMdara aayaa| usane mAdhurI ko cir3hAte hue kahA-le, mere se takarAra karatI hai to cakha isakA majA / gulAba kA phUla tU ne hI tor3A thA nA! maiMne kahA thA, merI bAta mAna jA, phUla mujhe lene de, para tU to lATa sAhaba ho rahI hai| merI bAta kaise mAnegI! para dekha, tU ne mujhe phUla nahIM lene diyA, isakA phala. tujhako mila gyaa| aba Age mujhase kabhI mata ldd'naa| mAdhurI : para maiMne to phUla tor3A hI nhiiN| maheza : to phira kisane tor3A ? |

Page #21
20 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI mAdhurI : mujhe kyA ptaa| maheza : dekha mAdhurI ! mujhe bevakUpha mata bnaa| tUne dopahara ko mujhe nahIM kahA thA ki maiM Aja zAma ko phUla tor3a lUMgI ? mAdhurI : kahA to thA para maiM to tere sAtha majAka kara rahI thii| kyA tU . ne mujhe nahIM kahA thA ki maiM sabere hI phUla tor3a kara chipA duuNgaa| maheza : para tU ne to saverA hone hI nahIM diyA, pahale hI phUla gAyaba kara diyaa| mAdhurI : nahIM, maheza! maiM vidyAmAtA kI saugaMdha khA kara kahatI hUM ki maiMne phUla nahIM todd'aa| maheza : to phira kisane toDA? mAdhurI : hamAre par3osa vAlI campA kAkI bhI to kaI bAra phUla le jAtI hai| maheza : para to bhI tumane cir3hAyA, isakA phala to mila hI gyaa| maiMne tumase hajAra bAra kaha diyA ki mujhase mata bhir3Akara / maiM terI caTanI banavA dUMgA, para tU sadA mere se akar3atI hai| isI kA yaha pariNAma hai| aba bhI tere meM akla hai to samajha jA / aba mere se kabhI mata akdd'naa| mAdhurI : para tU bhI to mere sAtha akar3atA hai| tU to mere sAtha vizvAsa ghAta karatA hai| tU ne usa dina bhI merI piTAI karavAI thii| __ aba dekha lenA, maiM bhI isakA badalA kaise letI hai ? maiM bhI terA jhUThA nAma lagAUMgI aura pApA se terI piTAI kraauuNgii| __yaha kahate-kahate mAdhurI kI AMkhe bhara aaii| maheza kuTilatA se haMsatA huA bAhara bhAga gyaa| itane meM aMdara se pApA kI AvAja gUjI-are, merI jeba meM paise the, kahAM gae ? suzIlA : tumhArI jeba meM pese hote bhI haiM, jo kahIM jAeM ? pApA : vAha ! mujhe bevakapha banA rahI ho| subaha hI meM apane kamIja meM eka rupaye kI cillara chor3a kara gayA thaa| suzIlA : chor3a kara jAte to mila jaate| yahAM koI jAdUgara to haiM nahIM, jo tumhAre paise ur3A le jaae|

Page #22
pApA : dekho, aisA mata bolo| mujhe acchI taraha yAda hai ki maiMne eka rupaye kI cillara apanI jeba meM chor3I thii| tuma sadA merI talAzI letI rahatI ho| maiM apane jeba kharca meM se jo bacAtA haM vaha bhI tuma hajama kara jAtI ho| suzIlA : maiM hajama karane vAlI kauna hU~ ? tumhIM jaba bhUla jAte ho, to maiM kyA karU ? - itane meM mAdhurI aMdara A gii| usane mAM bApa kA saMvAda sunA to khuza ho gii| acAnaka use zarArata suujhii| abhI vaha maheza dvArA karavAe gae apane apamAna ko bhUlI nahIM thii| pApA para usakA pUrA sAmrAjya thaa| usane socA ki maheza se badalA lene kA yaha sundara maukA hai| ataH vaha dhIre se bolI-pApA ! maiM batAUM, paise kahA~ gae ? pApA ne Azcarya se kahA- btaao| mAdhurI : pApA ! paise to maheza nikAla kara le gayA thaa| pApA : (patnI kI ora ghUrate hue dekha kara) dekhA apane zAhajAde ke kAranAme ! abhI se janAba corI karanA sIkha gae haiN| aura usI gusse meM unhoMne kar3aka kara maheza ko pukaaraa| maheza ke andara praveza karate hI unhoMne maheza ko aisA joradAra thappar3a mArA ki usakA muha sUja gyaa| eka hI thappar3a meM vaha to bicArA jamIna para baiTha gyaa| pApA usakI aura marammata karate, isase pahale hI suzIlA ne Akara maheza kA bacAva kiyaa| pApA bole -tU hI isako zaha detI hai, isase yaha dina-ba-dina bigar3atA jA rahA hai, para yAda rakhanA isa taraha yaha zAhajAdA sAre ghara ko tabAha karake rakha degaa| Aja ghara kA vAtAvaraNa bar3A tanAvapUrNa ho gyaa| pApA kA bhI mUDa bigaDa gayA, mammI kA bhI mUDa bigar3a gayA, maheza kA bhI mUDa bigar3a gayA, mAdhurI kA bhI mUDa vigar3a gyaa| maheza to andara jAkara phaphakaphaphakakara rone lgaa| usane sinemA jAne se bhI manA kara diyA / sinemA jAne kA samaya ho gayA para koI jAne ko taiyAra nahIM thaa| saar| majA hI kirakirA ho gayA thaa| sabhI eka dUsare ke doSoM ko dekha rahe the|

Page #23
22 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI Akhira pApA ne kahA-aba TikaTa A gae hoMge to unakA kyA hogA ! maiM anila ko kahakara AyA huuN| vaha plAjA para hamArA itajAra kara rahA hogaa| __suzIlA ne kahA - tuma cale jaao| 'pApA : para TikiTa to cAra hoNge| suzIlA : cAra hoMge to maiM kyA karUM ? tumane to sArA vAtAvaraNa hI uttejita kara diyA hai| pApA : para tU ne to bhI abhI mAdharI ko mArA thaa| yoM mArane se bacce sudharate haiM kyA? suzIlA : hA~, mujhe hI upadeza dete ho| aba tuma hI apane rAjakumAra ko manAkara laao| 'pApA : bhaI, aba gusse meM jo ho gayA so ho gayA / calo, maheza ko manA kara laao| jaldI karo, anila bora ho rahA hogaa| suzIlA : aba maiM kyoM manAUM? mArate to tuma ho aura marahama-paTTI karanI par3atI hai mujhe| maiM nahIM jaatii| tumheM hI manAnA hai to bnaao| pApA maheza ko manAne andara gae, para maheza to phaphaka-phaphakakara ro rahA thA / pApA ko dekhakara yaha aura bhI jora se rone lgaa| pApA ne kahA - dekho maheza yaha corI kI Adata acchI nahIM hai| tumheM paise cAhie to mAMgakara lo| hama kaba manA karate haiN| calo, aba apanI galtI svIkAra karo aura sinemA dekhane clo| yaha sunate hI maheza aura jyAdA ugra ho gyaa| vaha rotA huA bolA---pApA ! maiMne paise nahIM curAye haiN| pApA ko eka bAra gussA AyA / ve maheza para do-cAra hAtha ajamAne vAle hI the ki unakA pitatva jAga utthaa| socane lage- Aja taka maheza ne kabhI paise nahIM curAye aura na kabhI jhUTha bolA, to Aja yaha saba kaise ho gayA ? unhoMne apane Apa ko kAbU meM kiyA aura sthiti para vicAra karane lge| itane meM maheza kar3aka kara bolA - nahIM jAnA hai mujhe sinemaa| Apako jAnA hai to jAie / pApA samajha gae ki uttejanA meM

Page #24
bhUla / 23 maheza ko samajhAnA kaThina hogaa| ata: ve zAMta bhAva se lauTa aae| suzIlA se bole-baccoM ko ghara para hI chor3o aura apana clo| . suzIlA ko bhI Dara thA ki yadi hama nahIM gae to anila aura usakI patnI hamase jabAba talaba kie binA nahIM maanege| ghara kA jhagar3A mitroM ke sAmane khule binA nahIM rahegA, isalie binA mana usako taiyAra honA pdd'aa| maheza ke lie mAdhurI ko bhI ghara para hI chor3a diyA gyaa| maheza kA gussA abhI taka zAnta nahIM huA thaa| mAdhurI usake pAsa gaI aura use manAne lgii| vaha usake bAloM meM hAtha pherane lagI to maheza ne use ekadama jhaTaka diyaa| mAdhurI usake pAsa baiTha gii| eka ora maheza se badalA lene se khuza thI to dUsarI ora sinemA nahIM jAne tathA maheza ke joradAra mAra par3ane se dukhI bhI thii| _ro lene ke bAda jaba maheza thor3A zAMta huA to mAdhurI ne apanA muMha usake pAsa le jAkara pUchA - kyA bahuta jora se lagI hai ? maheza : (apanA mu~ha phulAkara) aura kyA prema kI pucakAra thii| dekha geMda kitanI jora se hiTa huI / pA~coM aMguliyoM ke nizAna par3e hoNge| dhIre-dhIre bAtacIta thor3I sahaja huI to mAdhurI bolI-dekha, Aja yaha mAra tumhAre apane kAranAmoM se hI par3I hai| maheza cauMka kara bolA - kyoM, maiMne kyA galata kAranAmeM kie ? pApA mere para jhUThA ilajAma lagAte haiM / maiMne Aja kyA kabhI bhI eka paisA nahIM curaayaa| mAdhurI : para, tumane mammI se merI jhUThI zikAyata nahIM kI thI ? maheza : kauna-sI jhUThI zikAyata ? mAdhurI : vAha, abhI bhUla gae / tumane hI to mammI se kahA thA ki phUla maiMne tor3A thaa| tumane merA jhUThA nAma liyA to maiMne bhI tumhArA jhUThA nAma le liyaa| maheza : are mAdhurI ! yaha saba terI zarArata hai / dekha lenA, mammI ko Ane de / maiM saba saccI-saccI bAta kaha kara terI aisI piTAI karAUMgA ki tujhe aspatAla jAnA pdd'egaa| basa, aba Ane de

Page #25
24 nae maMdira : nae pujArI mammI-pApA ko| maheza kI yaha AkrozapUrNa dhamakI sunakara mAdhurI itanI Dara gaI ki use bukhAra ho gyaa| usakI jabAna banda ho gii| vaha akSama hokara pharza para hI leTa gaI / jaba taka mammI-pApA Aye taba taka maheza ko bhInIMda A gii| unhoMne bela bajA-bajA kara bar3I muzkila se maheza ko uThAyA / AdhI nIMda meM hI maheza ne daravAjA kholaa| vAtAvaraNa badala jAne se mammI-pApA kA mana thoDA zAMta ho gayA thA, para jaba suzIlA ne pharza para leTI haI mAdharI ko bichaune para sone ke lie uThAyA to stabdha raha gii| mAdhurI kA zarIra Aga kI taraha jala rahA thaa| suzIlA atyanta mamatAmayI hokara bolI--are, mAdhurI ko to teja bukhAra ho gayA hai / para mAdhurI nIMda meM itanI besudha thI ki use davAI bhI nahIM dI jA skii| sabere bhI mAdhurI kA bukhAra cAlU thA / ataH vaha skUla bhI nahIM jA skii| maheza mAra tathA apamAna se itanA saMtapta thA ki vaha binA nAztA kie hI skUla calA gyaa| yadyapi vaha pApA se apanI kaiphiyata denA cAhatA thA tathA mammI se mAdhurI kI marammata bhI karavAnA cAhatA thA, para mAdhurI bukhAra meM thI ataH yaha saMbhava nahIM ho sakA / vaha gusse meM hI skUla calA gyaa| subaha se hI ghara kA vAtAvaraNa bojhila thaa| itane meM par3osina campA kI lar3akI kisI kAma se unake ghara A gii| usakI coTI meM lage hue gulAba ke phUla ko dekhakara suzIlA ne pUchA-are yaha phUla kahAM se lAI ? usane kahA--tumako patA nahIM hai kyA? kala mammI ne tumhArI bagiyA meM se lAkara hI yaha phUla merI coTI meM gUMthA thaa| phUla bar3A acchA thA, ataH rAta ko maiM ise utArakara so gaI thii| subaha phira se lagA liyA hai| ___itanA sunate hI suzIlA andara kamare meM bhAgI maura mAdhurI se lipaTa gaI / usakI AMkhoM meM pazcAtApa ke AMsU A gae / mAdhurI ko bAra-bAra cUmate hue usane kahA-beTI, tumhArA koI doSa nhiiN| maiMne galatI se tumheM mArA / na jAne maheza ne mujhe kyoM galata sUcanA dI, jisase mukSase yaha al

Page #26
bhUla / 25 galatI ho gaI / mere kAraNa tere ko yaha bukhAra ho gayA / aba tU usa bAta ko bhUla jA aura zAMta ho jA / mAdhurI mammI kA yaha atizaya prema tathA pazcAttApa dekhakara thor3I Azvasta huii| usane kahA- mammI ! pappU ne merA jhUThA nAma liyA, isase maiMne bhI usakA jhUThA nAma le liyA / vAstava meM paise usane nahIM curAe the / maiMne usakA jhUThA nAma le liyA thA / mammI, tU mujhe pITegI ? pappU ne kahA thA ki maiM mammI se tumhArI marammata karAUMgA / itane meM hI bAhara se pApA kI AvAja AI / 'are, paise to mere purAne zarTa meM par3e haiN| maiM to bhUla hI gayA / vyartha hI maiMne maheza ko apamAnita kiyA / ' yaha kahate-kahate ve andara A gae / spaSTa rUpa se unake cehare para pazcAttApa kA bhAva jhalaka rahA thA / suzIlA ne kahA- Aja maheza bhUkhA hI skUla calA gayA hai / tuma jarA jaldI karo aura Aphisa jAne se pahale usakA nAztA skUla pahu~cA Ao' maiMne nAztA taiyAra kara diyA hai / pApA usI samaya nAztA lekara skUla pahu~ce / maheza kA mana aba bhI azAMta thA / unhoMne muzkila se use eka ora bulAkara kahA - maheza ! mujhase galtI ho gaI beTe ! mAdhurI ke kahane se maiMne tumhArA apamAna kiyA / mujhe mere paise bhI mila gae haiM tathA mAdhurI ne bhI apanI galatI svIkAra kara lI hai / vaha bukhAra se pIr3ita hai / tuma use kSamA karo / merA mana bhI pazcAttApa se jala rahA hai| aba tuma khAnA khAo aura pichalI ko bhUla jAo / mAdhurI kI pIr3A tathA pApA ke cehare para ubhare pazcAttApa ke bhAvoM se maheza abhibhUta ho gyaa| aba taka vaha dUsaroM kI galatI dekha rahA thA / aba use apanI galatI bhI spaSTa dikhAI dene lagI / vaha pApA se kSamA mAMgate hue bolA, pApA ! mujhe mApha karo / vAstava meM galatI ApakI yA mAdhurI kI nahIM hai merI hI galatI hai / maiMne hI binA jAne-bUjhe usa para Aropa lagAyA / usane jo kucha kiyA, vaha to kevala pratikriyA thI /

Page #27
26 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI maiM abhI Apake sAtha calatA hUM tathA mAdhurI se mAMphI mAMgatA hUM / pApA ne klAsa TIcara se kahakara maheza ko apane sAtha liyaa| aba taka mAdhurI kA bukhAra kAphI kama ho gayA thA, para jaba maheza ne usase mAphI mAMgI taba to vAtAvaraNa atyanta dravita ho gayA thA / mAdhurI kA rahA-sahA bukhAra bhI utara gayA /

Page #28
kamIzana relave paTariyoM ke sAtha-sAtha calane vAlI pagaDaMDI se hokara Aphisa jAnA merA rojamarrA kA kArya hai| aba to yaha rAstA mujhase itanA paricita ho gayA hai ki zAyada AMkheM mIMcakara bhI nikala jAUM, para prArambha meM itanA sahaja nahIM thA / bIca meM kucha khAlI mAla-Dibbe par3e rahate haiM / kucha iMjana bhI IMdhana pAnI ke lie khar3e rahate haiN| samaya-samaya para gAr3iyoM kI sAiDiMga bhI hotI rahatI hai, para yaha rAstA thor3A zArTakaTa hai, isalie maiM kaI varSoM se idhara se hI AtA-jAtA huuN| prArambha meM jaba maiMne isa rAha se AnA-jAnA zurU kiyA, to dekhA ki kucha kizoriyA~ iMjana dvArA khAlI kiye gaye rAkha keDhera meM se kucha adhajale koyale bIna rahI haiN| maiMne socA, isa vesTeja se bhI kitane jIva pala rahe haiN| bhale hI relave vAloM ko rAkha ke Dhera se koI matalaba nahIM, para khojane vAle kahA~-kahA~ kaise-kaise artha khoja lete haiM ? koyaloM kI kAlikha se kizoriyoM ke phaTe hue kapar3e hI kAle nahIM ho jAte the, apitu pasIne se lathapatha unake cehare bhI jagaha-jagaha se kAle ho jAte the| unakI AMkhoM meM eka ajIba prakAra kI nirAzA mujhe spaSTa dikhAI detI thii| kabhI-kabhI jaba rAkha ke Dhera meM se koI bar3A adhajalA koyalA mila jAtA, to unakI AMkhoM meM aisI camaka A jAtI, mAno unheM koI khajAnA mila gayA ho / mujhe bhI unakI khuzI se thor3I khushiihotii| mujhe lagatA, manuSya eka dUsare ke sAtha kitanI sUkSmatA se baMdhA huA hai| dhIre-dhIre maiMne dekhA ki iMjana ke khalAsI AvazyakatA se pahale hI iMjana ko khAlI kara rahe haiM / isa silasile meM kAphI adhajale koyale nIce gira jAte haiN| isase kizoriyoM ko kucha adhika koyale milane

Page #29
28 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI lge| unakI TokariyAM jaldI-jaldI bharane lgiiN| taba unake sAtha kucha adher3a tathA praur3ha auratoM ko bhI meM vahA~ dekhane lgaa| eka dina maiMne dekhA ki khalAsI kucha binA jale koyale ke bar3e-bar3e patthara hI nIce pheMka rahA hai / kizoriyAM unheM bar3I muzkila se uThA pA rahI thiiN| praur3hAeM unakA sahayoga kara rahI thIM / ve jaldI-jaldI unheM apanI TUTI huI TokariyoM meM bhara kara paTariyoM kI sImA ko pAra kara rahI thiiN| mujhe dekhakara eka kSaNa khalAsI cauMkA / kizoriyAM aura praur3hAeM bhI cauNkii| maiM bhI cauMkA / para maiM unakI garIbI ko dekhakara cupa ho gyaa| maiM socane lagA ki yadi manuSya ko jIne kA adhikAra hai to do roTI prApta karane kA adhikAra bhI honA cAhie / yadyapi usa avasara para rASTradroha kI bAta bhI mere mana meM AI, para unakI garIbI ke sAmane merI kaThoratA pighala gaI aura maiM sArI bAta ko anadekhA kara Age nikala gayA / phira to dhIre-dhIre yaha krama bhI bar3hane lagA / khalAsI roja-roja bar3e-bar3e koyale iMjana se nIce khisakAte aura kizoriyAM tathA praur3hAeM unheM apanI TokariyoM meM bharakara jaldI-jaldI bhAga jAtI / aba unheM merA koI Dara nahIM raha gayA thA / ve samajhane lagIM thI ki merI ora se unheM koI khatarA nahIM hai / I pahale to maiMne socA ki DrAivara tathA khalAsI inake sambandhI hoMge, jo apane garIba riztedAroM kI madada karate haiM, para eka dina maiMne dekhA ki eka praur3hA hAtha meM eka-eka rupaye ke kucha noTa liye khalAsI se kucha bAta kara rahI hai / khalAsI kaha rahA hai -- "itane se kAma nahIM calegA / maiMne itane koyale girAe haiM, pAMca rupaye dene hoMge / " praur3hA ne eka noTa aura nikAlA / khalAsI ne use bar3I rukhAI se apane jeba meM DAla liyA aura iMjana joradAra sITI detA huA daur3a gayA / aba to isa dRzya ko maiM roja-roja dekhane lagA / paTarI ke pAsa relave pulisa kI eka TaparI (hut ) thI / usameM do sazastra relave pulisa hara kSaNa DyUTI para tainAta rahate the / eka dina maiMne dekhA ki pulisa vAloM ne una paur3hAoM aura kizoriyoM ko pakar3A / kizoriyAM to bhAga gayIM, para praur3hAeM nizcala mudrA meM khar3I rahIM / pulisavAloM ne unake pAsa Akara unheM dhamakAnA zurU kiyA - yaha koyalA tumhAre bApa kA hai.

Page #30
kamIzasa | 26 jo bedhar3aka le jA rahI ho?" aurateM kucha bolI nahIM / laba pulisavAlA bahuta teja bolane lagA, to paur3hAoM ke cehare para eka arthapUrNa haMsI phaila gii| pulisavAlA apane-Apa narama par3a gyaa| maiM usa dina to Age nikala gayA, paraaba Aye dina paur3hAoM tathA pulisavAloM meM rahayasyapUrNa phusaphusAhaTa hotI rahatI, balki ve unake pAsa baiThakara pAna-tambAkU khAtI aura bAteM bhI karatI rhtiiN| kabhI-kabhI unake hAthoM meM noTa bhI camakate rahate / kabhI jaba koI nayA pulisavAlA AtA, to vaha jarA teja boltaa| maiM samajha gayA ki usakA vaha jhagar3A kevala rauba jamAne vAlA hotA thaa| thor3e dinoM meM jaba vaha yahAM kI havA pAnI meM rama jAtA to usameM bhI eka pAlatUpana A jAtA aura unameM Apasa meM pArivArika salAha-mazavirA kA sA krama zurU ho jaataa| hAlAMki garIba auratoM kI garIbI para mujhe tarasa AtA aura maiM pighala jAtA, phira bhI nujhe DrAivara, khalAsI tathA pulisavAloM kI beImAnI akharatI rhtii| kaI bAra maiMne unakI zikAyata karane kI bAta bhI socI, para eka bAra to maiMne dekhA ki eka pulisa aphasara bhI udhara AyA aura apanA kamIzana baTorane lgaa| maiM samajha gayA isa dhandhe kI jar3eM kAphI gaharAI taka phailI huI haiN| maiMne Upara taka jAne kI bAta bhI socI, para jaba mujhe apane Aphisa kI yAda A gayI to maiM socane lagA ki AdamI saba jagaha eka sA hI hotA hai / yadyapi mere lie beImAnI kA koI avasara nahIM hai, para maiM kaha nahIM sakatA, yadi mujhe avasara milatA to apane sthAna para kitanA ImAnadAra rhtaa| sacamuca meM to beImAnI kA yaha dhandhA Upara ke Aphisara se caparAsI taka calatA hai| isa mAmale meM pisate haiM to becAre garIba hI pisate haiN| isalie maiMne isa ora dhyAna denA ho banda kara diyaa| aba roja merI AMkhoM ke sAmane yaha dhandhA hotA hai / maiM mauna-darzaka kI bhAMti use dekhatA rahatA huuN| maiM nahIM jAnatA ki yaha ucita kara rahA hUM yA anucita ? para itanA taya hai ki mere sAre tarka cuka gaye haiM / maiM aba eka mahAtmA kI taraha udAsIna bhAva se ghara se AtA hUM aura daphtara calA jAtA huuN|

Page #31
dUsarA pahalU subaha se hI seTha hIrAlAlajI ke ghara kA vAtAvaraNa tanAvapUrNa ho gayA thaa| yadyapi yaha Aja koI naI bAta nahIM thii| mahIne meM pacIsa dina isa ghara meM aisA hI vAtAvaraNa rahatA hai / seThajI prAtaH cAra baje hI uTha gae the| mAlA-manakA tathA saMdhyA-pUjA se nivRtta ho jAne ke bAda ve apane ghara ke bAhara kI caukI para baiThakara tamAkhU se dAMta ghisa rahe the| yaha bhI unakA roja kA nityakarma thA / unake lie roTI chUTa jAnA phira bhI saMbhava ho sakatA thA, para dina meM tIna bAra tambAkhU se dAMta ghise binA rahanA asaMbhava thA / Adhe ghaMTe taka baiThe-baiThe ve dAMta bhI ghisate jAte the tathA idhara-udhara kI gapa-zapa bhI karate jAte the| isa silasile meM jo koI bhI udhara se gujaratA, use binA kucha-kahe-sune gujaranA muzkila thaa| Aja bhI unhoMne rAjArAma ko pakar3a liyaa| use kaha rahe the--dekho, kaisA jamAnA A gayA hai| do ghaMTA dina car3hane ko AyA hai, para abhItaka merA beTA rameza uThA nahIM hai| sacamuca Ajakala kaliyuga A gayA hai| hasAre jamAne meM to hama apane bApa se pahale uThate the| seThAnI subaha-subaha uThakara ghara kI saphAI karatI thI, ATA pIsatI thI, dahI bilotI thI, kueM se pAnI lAtI thI, phira bhI majAla hai ki kabhI cAcA jI ke nAzte meM derI ho jAya / para Aja sthiti yaha hai ki rameza kI bahU abhI taka uThI hI nahIM hai / ghara kA sArA kAma bicArI bUr3hI ko karanA par3atA hai| aba usake koI kAma karane ke dina haiM ? para kyA kare ? kahe kisako ? apanI jAMgha ughAr3ane meM khuda ko hI zarma AtI hai| hamane to socA thA ki isa chokare kI zAdI ho jAyegI to bUr3hI ko jarA ArAma milegA, para aba to ulTA kAma ho gayA

Page #32
dUsarA pahalU / 31 hai / bUr3hI bImAra par3I hai aura bahU abhI taka uThI bhI nahIM hai / rAjArAma - are seTha jI ! Ajakala ke logoM kI kucha na pUchie / merA bhI chokarA aisA hI hai / bahU to usase bhI Age hai / merI aurata ko unako cAya banAkara pilAnI par3atI hai / jaldI uThane ko kahate haiM, to uttara de detI hai- mujhase jaldI nahIM uThA jAtA / tumase kAma hotA ho to karo, nahIM to naukarAnI rakha lo / seTha - are bhAI ! Ajakala jamAnA aisA hI A tumhArI yaha sthiti hai ki tuma naukarAnI rakha lo ? para Ajakala kI chokariyAM to mahArAniyAM banakara AtI haiM / bI0 e0, ema0 e0 par3ha jarUra jAtI haiM, para unheM rasoI banAnA nahIM AtA / rameza kI bahU ko hI dekho / ghara para mehamAna Ae hue the / unake lie rasoI banAnI thI, para bahu to saja-dhaja kara sinemA ke lie taiyAra ho gaI / Akhira use jabaradastI rokanA par3A / para binA mana kahIM rasoI hotI hai? usane pUriyAM banAyI to jaise ghI meM talakara rakha dIM / ( gaumAtA ko khilAne kA puNya lUTane ke liye seTha jI una pUriyoM ko apane pAsa lie baiThe the) rAjArAma ko batAte hue bole- dekho ! ghI to kharAba huA so huA hI, para ve sikakara itanI AkarI ho gaI haiM ki hamase to khAI hI nahIM gaI / maiMne use thor3A ulahanA de diyA to muMha phulAkara baiTha gaI / itane meM pIche se rameza nikala AyA / vaha garaja kara bolApitA jI ! Apako yahI kAma hai yA aura kucha bhI ? Apako eka beTAbahU hai, unakA sukha bhI Apase nahIM sahA jAtA / itanA hI nahIM, gAMva meM hamArI badanAmI karate phirate haiM / sacamuca Apane hamArA jIvana naraka banA diyA hai, para hai bhagavAna ! aba jAyeM bhI to kahA~ ? seTa jI - kahA~ kyA, dukAna meM jAo / yoM ghara meM baiThe-baiThe kAma nahIM clegaa| Aja taka gadhe kI taraha khaTa-khaTa kara maiMne dukAna calAI hai / aba thor3I tuma bhI saMbhAlo / rameza - para Apako kauna kahatA hai ki Apa dukAna para baiTho / Apase khuda hI rahA nahIM jaataa| roja subaha ATha baje jAkara baiThate ho / aba itanA jaldI dukAna jAnA jarUrI hai ? kauna grAhaka itanI jaldI AtA gayA hai / aba kyA kareM ?

Page #33
32 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI hai ? aura AyA bhI to kauna-sI laMkA luTa rahI hai ? apane bhAgya meM likhA hai vaha apane-Apa mila jaayegaa| para Apako kauna kahe ? Apa kisI kI suneM taba na ! seTha jI -hA~, koI roTI jabaradastI tumhAre muMha meM ThUMsakara calA jAyegA ? jaba taka hama jIte haiM, taba taka tumhAre lie kamAte haiM, para tumako yaha bhI acchA nahIM lagatA / tumase to hameM roTI-Tukar3e kA bhI sukha nahIM hai / ulTA hameM hI tumheM khilAnA par3atA hai / rameza pitA jI ! Apa kyoM yoM binA matalaba baka-baka kara rahe haiM / hameM Apake paise kI AvazyakatA nahIM hai / mujha para itanA ahasAna na lAdeM / hamAre bhAgya meM jo likhA hogA, vaha apane Apa mila jAyegA | itanA kahakara rameza to tIra kI taraha calA gayA / pIche se seThajI dAMta pIsakara raha gaye / itane meM kumhAra kA eka chokarA apane gadhoM para miTTI bharakara udhara se nikalA / usake eka gadhe ke gale meM TrAMjisTara laTaka rahA thA / usameM gAnA cala rahA thA - "tere binA bhI kyA jInA / " chokarA maje se usakI dhuna meM dhuna milAkara gA rahA thaa| eka kSaNa ke lie seTha jI apanI bAta ko bhUla gae aura gIta kI usa paMkti aura chokare kI ekTiMga meM ulajha gae / ve rAjArAma se kahane lage - dekho rAjArAma ! kyA jamAnA A gayA hai ? kumhAra bhI Ajakala gadhe ke gale meM TrAMjisTara laTakAkara gAne sunate phirate haiM / rAjArAma ne bhI usake sura meM sura milAkara kahA'hAM seTha jI ! basa aba kaliyuga meM koI kasara nahIM raha gaI hai / dekhiye na ! isa chokare kA bApa pIche cala rahA hai aura chokarA maje se gAtA-bajAtA jA rahA hai / sAle ko apane bApa kI zarma nahIM hai / hama to apane jamAne meM apane bApa ke sAmane AMkha uThAkara bhI nahIM dekhate the, para Ajakala sabakucha farr3a gayA / ww gadhoM kI katAra ke pIche hI pIche chokare kA bApa cala rahA thA / usane yaha saMvAda sunA to bola uThA - seTha jI ! do dina kI isa jiMdagI meM AdamI jitanA haMsa le, utanA apanA hai / Akhira eka dina sabhI ko yahAM se cale jAnA hai / isa chokare kI becAre kI yahI avasthA hai ki thor3I

Page #34
dUsarA pahalU / 33 mastI kara le| isIlie maiMne isako TrAMjisTara kharIda diyA hai| subahazAma sabako hI isakA Ananda mila jAtA hai| bhagavAna ne jiMdagI dI hai to kyoM ro-bisura kara jiyeM ? Akhira bacce hI to hamArI saMpatti haiN| inakI khuzI hI hamArI khuzI hai| apane jamAne meM hamane bhI yoM hI mastI kI thii| ho sakatA hai, hamArA jamAnA thor3A saMkoca kA rahA ho, para hamAre bar3e-bUr3he to hameM kosate hI the| mujhe apane bApa kI phaTakAra yAda hai| usane mujhe kabhI sinemA nahIM jAne diyA, para maiM rukatA thor3e hI thaa| chupa-chupa kara jAtA thaa| isIlie maiMne to soca liyA ki baccoM ko rokanA nirarthaka hai| samajhadArI isI meM hai ki hama unakI khuzI ko apanI khuzI banA leN| taba to ve aMkuza meM bhI rahane ko taiyAra ho jaayeNge| aba dekhiye, yaha chokarA merI kitanI adaba karatA hai| dina bhara mere sAtha mehanata karatA hai / merI hara suvidhA kA khyAla rakhatA hai| kabhI mere sAmane nahIM boltaa| yaha saba isIlie hai ki maiMne bhI isakI khuzI meM hI apanI khuzI samajha lI hai| yaha kahakara kumhAra itanI mukta haMsI haMsA ki sArA vAtAvaraNa mukharita ho uThA, para seTha jI gahare vicAra meM par3a gye| ve usa azikSita kumhAra kI kasauTI para apane-Apako kasane meM lIna ho gye| socane lagekyA maiM bhI rameza ke sAtha aisA vyavahAra nahIM kara sakatA? kyA maiM bhI rameza kI khuzI ko apanI khuzI nahIM banA sakatA ? unheM lagA, jaise usa garIba kumhAra ne unheM eka bahuta mUlyavAna nasIhata de DAlI hai| yaha saMyoga kI bAta hai ki hamAre sAmane ghaTanAe~ to hara kSaNa ghaTatI rahatI haiM, para kabhI-kabhI koI ghaTanA hamAre mana meM bahuta gaharAI se paiTha jAtI hai / seTha jI usa kumhAra para bar3e prasanna hue aura gAya ko khilAne ke liye jo pUriyA~ lAye the, unheM dete hue bole-lo, thor3A prasAda lete jaao| __ kumhAra ne vehicaka apanA aMgochA seTha jI ke sAmane phailA diyaa| seTha jI ne atyanta kRtajJatA se sArI kI sArI pUriyAM usake aMgoche meM DAla dii| kumhAra seTha jI ko dhanyavAda detA huA apane putra ko sambodhana karate hue bolA- "are puniyA~ ! dekha seTha jI ne Aja hameM kaisA prasAda

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34 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI diyA hai ? pUriyA~ kitanI AkarI-AkarA sakA huI hai / la, tU bhA khaa| seTha jI ko phira eka jhaTakA lgaa| ve socane lage ki yahI jIvana hai| bApa aura beTe ko jor3ane vAlA yadi koI sUtra hai to vaha prema hI hai, para sAtha hI sAtha unheM eka dUsarI bAta bhI bIMdha gii| ve socane lage--. ina pUriyoM ko dekhane kI eka dRSTi merI thI, para inheM dekhane kI eka dRSTi isakI bhI hai| maiMne pUriyoM meM avaguNa dekhA, para isane inameM bhI guNa DhUMr3ha liyaa| seTha jI ke rugNa mana ko jaise bahuta muphIda davA mila gii| ve usI kSaNa vahAM se uTha gye| unheM isa bAta kA khyAla hI nahIM rahA ki rAjArAma unake pAsa baiThA hai| ve sIdhe seThAnI ke pAsa gaye jaura usase bolerameza kI mA~ ! rameza bahuta varSoM se kazmIra ghUmane kI bAta kaha rahA hai| cAra-pA~ca dina meM usako taiyAra kara do| bahU se pUcha lo| yadi vaha cAhe to kisI naukara-naukarAnI ko sAtha le jA sakate haiN| kharca-varca kI koI paravA nhiiN| Akhira unakI khuzI meM hI hamArI khazI hai| ___ yaha kahate-kahate seTha jI ke A~khoM meM vAtsalya ke A~sU chalaka Aye / seThAnI bhI unakI prasannatA se nahAkara itanI tAjagI se bhara gaI ki bola nahIM paaii| usane rameza kI bahu ko bulAkara seThajI kI bAta kahI to vaha bolI- nahIM mAMsA ! abhI kahA~ kazmIra jAnA hai ! abhI to tumhArI tabIyata hI acchI nahIM hai| jaba tumheM ArAma ho jAyegA to bAda meM soceNge| seThAnI bolI-nahIM beTI ! merI tabiyata kI kyA bAta hai ? maiM to sadA bImAra hI rahatI huuN| ghara ke kAma-dhandhe meM ghula-ghula kara mara gaI huuN| tumhAre abhI khelane-khAne ke dina haiM / jAo, khuzI se kazmIra yA jahA~ tumhArA jI cAhe ghUma Ao / tumhArI khuzI hI hamArI khuzI hai / hAM, kisI bAta kI taMgI mata dekhanA / rameza kI bahU sAsU ke caraNoM meM jhuka gaI / zraddhA ke A~sUoM kI do bUMdoM ne sAsU ke caraNoM ko gIlA kara diyaa| yaha ArdratA usake TheTha hRdaya taka pahuMca gaI

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tIsarA aparAdha hamArA makAna aina mena ror3a para basA huA hai / ise kisakA doSa kahA jAe ki hamAre makAna kI tIsarI pair3I sIdhI sar3aka para hI utaratI hai , yaha eka khoja kA viSaya hai ki kaise nagarapAlikA ne yaha makAna banAne kI ijAjata dedI? kaise makAna-mAlika ne isa taraha makAna banavA liyA ? para hama svayaM bhI isa doSa se mukta nahIM ho sakate ki hamane bhI kyoM yaha makAna kirAye para liyA ? eka lAina meM do-do kamaroM ke bane hue hamAre dasa makAna eka prakAra se kholI jaise hI haiM / na sAmane khulI jagaha na pIche khulI jgh| agala-bagala meM to khaira khulI jagaha hone kA savAla hI nahIM hai / aba yaha to nahIM ho sakatA ki jahAM parivAra basate haiM, vahA~ bacce na hoN| aura yaha bhI nahIM ho sakatA ki bacce hoM aura khele nahIM / balki hamAre dasa parivAroM ke bacce to aise haiM ki dhamA-caukar3I macAne meM unheM zAyada pharsTa prAija mila sake / vaise hamAre dasoM hI parivAra naukarI-pezA logoM ke haiM / hama sabhI alaga-alaga gAMvoM se Ae haiN| phira bhI Apasa meM mela-milApa itanA hai ki jaise eka hI parivAra ke sadasya hoM / puruSoM kI apekSA mahilAoM kI dostI bahuta gaharI hai / yadyapi par3osiyoM ke sAtha prema se rahanA basa kI bAta nahIM hotI, para hamane apane-apane parivAroM se kaha rakhA hai ki yadi Apasa meM prema se nahIM rahogI to hamArA jInA bhI dUbhara ho jaaegaa| puruSa loga to khaira apane oNphisa kI cintA meM ghule rahate haiM, phira bhI kabhI-kabhAra idharaudhara kI koI pArTI ho hI jAtI hai| Akhira sabhI loga par3he-likhe haiM, ataH jIvana kA rasa lene kI pUrI AkAMkSA hama meM hai / para, isa mAmale meM hamArI

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36 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI mahilAe~ aura bhI Age haiN| puruSoM ke daphtara cale jAne ke bAda muhalle para unakA hI ekachatra sAmrAjya rahatA hai / ata: gRha kArya se nivRtta ho kisI bhI jagaha unakI anAyojita goSThI jama jAtI hai / idhara-udhara kI hI nahIM, saba tarapha kI carcAe~ vahA~ ve roka-Toka hotI rahatI hai / bar3e bacce to skUla cale jAte haiM, para choTe bacce Apasa meM khelate rahate haiM / kabhI-kabhI lar3ate-jhagar3ate tathA rote rahate haiM / para paDosI dharma ke marma ko samajhane vAlI hamArI aurateM apane-apane baccoM ke AMsU pUMcha-pAcha kara cupa karA detI haiM aura phira apanI bAtoM ke eka sUtrI kAryakrama meM vyasta ho jAtI haiN| hama bahuta bAra auratoM ko samajhAte haiM ki hamAre sAmane hI nahIM, balki ThIkaM saTakara mena roDa hai / yAtAyAta kA dabAba rahatA hai, ataH baccoM ko sar3aka para na jAne deN| para, auratoM kA sIdhA javAba rahatA hai ki kyA bacce khele binA raha sakate haiM ? hama kahate haiM ki phira bhI unheM thor3A kanTrola meM rakhanA cAhie | kabhI bhI koI durghaTanA ho sakatI hai, para unakA sIdhA javAba rahatA hai ki itanA baccoM kA khyAla hai to yahA~ sar3aka ke Upara makAna liyA hI kyoM ? kahIM koI acchA-sA phlaiTa kyoM na le lete ? hama bhI to ArAma se rahatI / hama baccoM kA dhyAna rakhate hI haiM to bhI tuma puruSa logoM kA tAnA to hamAre sira para hI par3a jAtA hai ? yaha bhI maje kI bAta hai ki hamArI hara bAta kA jabAba aurateM samUha kI bhASA meM detI haiM / phira bhI apanI lAcArI tathA auratoM kI ApasI maitrI ko dekha hameM khuzI hotI hai, isalie choTI-moTI bAtoM kI ora hameM dhyAna dene kI jarUrata nahIM hai / kisI bacce kI bImArI, dAkhalA Adi choTe-choTe kAma binA kisI bheda bhAva ke hamArA saMgaThita mahilA maNDala apane-Apa sambhAla letA hai / unakI isa ekatA se Akhira hamako bhI thor3I rAhata milatI hai / ataH hama bhI isa yUniyana ke jiMdAbAda kA nArA lagA dete haiM / eka dina maiM oNphisa se AyA to dekhA ki pIche se eka vyakti teja sAikila daur3AtA A rahA hai / hamAre bacce sar3aka para khela rahe the / sAIkila vAle ne vicAre ne AvAja dI, para har3abar3AhaTa meM bacce idharaudhara bhAge / itane meM par3ausI kA baccA rameza usakI capeTa meM A gayA /

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tIsarA aparAdha / 37. yadyapi roja-roja ke abhyAsa ke kAraNa hamAre bacce durghaTanA se bacane ke abhyasta ho gaye haiM, para honahAra ko to nahIM TAlA jA sktaa| ise aMgrejI meM isIlie eksIDeTa kahA gayA hai / yadyapi sAIkila vAle kI sAiDa galata nahIM thii| rameza ko coTa bhI koI khAsa nahIM lagI thii| thor3I sI khaMroca sI AI thii| thor3A khUna bahane lagA thA, para rameza itane jora se cillAne lagA, jaise usakA antima samaya A gayA ho| sAIkala vAle kI yaha galatI avazya thI ki eksIDeTa hone para bhI vaha nIce nahIM utarA, balki aura tejI se sAikila daur3AtA huA bhAga gyaa| hamAre Asa-pAsa kI aurateM rameza ke rone kI AvAja suna apane-apane kamare se bAhara nikala aaii| sAIkila savAra ko bhAgate hue dekha ve eka svara meM cillA uThIMtuma khar3e-khar3e kyA dekhate ho ? pakar3o-pakar3o, beImAna aiksIDeMTa kara bhAga rahA hai| saMyoga se maiM apanI sAIkila se utara hI rahA thaa| ataH auratoM ne mujhe hI Adeza diyA--dekhate kyA ho? bhAgo, badamAza ko pakar3o / bacce kA eksIDeMTa bhI kara diyA aura vinA sambhAla kiye bhAgA jA rahA hai| sacamuca ye loga Ajakala bahuta badamAza ho gaye haiN| isIlie to jagahajagaha eksIDeMTa hote rahate haiN| isakA pratikAra na karo, to kaise sudhAra ho? mujhe bhI lagA ki vAstava meM aise logoM ko zikSA denI caahie| ataH maiMne bhI apanI sAIkila usake pIche kara dii| usane to apanI sArI tAkata sAIkila para jhoMka diiN| maiMne bhI usako pakar3ane kA pakkA irAdA kara liyA thA, ataH apanI pUrI tAkata lagA dI / baski eka-do jagaha to merA bhI eksIDeMTa hote-hote bacA / hama donoM havA kI taraha daur3e jA rahe the| ____ rAha-calate kucha loga asamajha ke kAraNa hamArI daur3a ko dekhakara bAteM kara rahe the, dekho, kaisI dIvAnagI hai| Ajakala nAgarikatA kA to nAma zeSa hI nahIM raha gayA haiN| bhIr3a-bharI sar3akoM para aise daur3e jA rahe haiM jaise yaha sar3aka unake bApa kI hai| eka-do vyaktiyoM ne Age Akara hameM rokane kI koziza kI para, hama bacakara nikala gaye / vaha Age daur3a rahA thA aura maiM piiche| daur3ate-daur3ate maiM usake kAphI najadIka pahuMca gyaa| usane

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38 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI bhI dekhA ki aba usakA mere se baca pAnA asambhava hai| ataH sAikila rokakara khar3A ho gyaa| maiM najadIka pahuMcA to baha hAtha jor3a kara khar3A ho gyaa| kahane lagA--bhAI sAhaba ! Apa mujhe mAranA cAhate ho to mAro, para merI eka bAta suneM / dekhiye, Age vaha jo vyakti sAIkila para daur3a rahA hai, vaha bhI hamAre mohalle meM eksIDeTa karake A rahA hai / eka bacce kI TAMga TUTa gaI hai, ataH maiM use pakar3ane ke lie jA rahA huuN| maiM mAnatA hUM ki merI galatI huI hai| yadyapi merI sAiDa galata nahIM thii| maiMne Apake bacce ko AvAja bhI dI thI, para durbhAgyavaza vaha capeTa meM A hI gayA / maiM itanA nirdaya nahIM hUM ki aise mauke para nahIM rUka sakatA / para maiM bhI usa vyakti ko pakar3anA cAhatA thaa| isalie maiM nahIM tthhraa| yadi Apa mujhe mAranA cAheM to mAra leM, para merA anurodha hai ki eka bAra usa agale vyakti ko avazya pakar3A jaae| yadyapi merA tIsare sAikila savAra se koI riztA nahIM thA, para phira bhI maiMne dekhA ki bAta kUcha rahasyapUrNa mAlUma par3atI hai| rameza ke koI jyAdA coTa nahIM lagI haiM, aura yaha sAikila bAlA to merI giraphta meM hai| isa baccU ko to aba maiM nahIM choDUMgA, para kyoM na isa sahasA Agata rahasya ko bhI jAna liyA jaaye| aba derI karane kA samaya nahIM thA / hamAre derI karane se agalA vyakti raphphUcakkara ho jaaegaa| ata: maiMne kahA, ' calo, hama bhI use pakar3ate haiM / yaha taya kara hama donoM apanI-apanI sAikiloM para savAra ho ge| agalA sAikila savAra bhI prANoM kI vAjI lagAkara bhAga rahA thaa| prANa-rakSA ke avasara para AdamI meM kucha atirikta tAkata A jAtI hai, phira bhI kAphI bhAgane se vaha thaka gayA thaa| hama donoM kI raphtAra kAphI teja thI, balki maiM thor3A Age daur3a rahA thaa| agale vAle sAikila savAra se merA phAsalA bahuta thor3A raha gayA thaa| vaha bAra-bAra mur3a kara pIche dekha rahA thA / jaba maiM usake kAphI najadIka pahuMcA to, mujhe lagA-vaha to koI paricita sA vyakti hai| maiMne use lalakAra kara kahA-Thahara jAo, nahIM to khairiyata nahIM hogii| merI AvAja sunakara usane apanI gati dhImI kara dii| jyoMhI maiM usake najadIka pahuMcA, vaha sAikila se utara pdd'aa| mujhe yaha dekhakara bar3A Azcarya huA ki vaha to

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tIsarA aparAdha | 36 mere mAmA kA veTA bhAI anila thaa| maiMne Azcarya se kahA, are anila ! tU yahAM kaise ? kahAM bhAgA jA rahA hai ? kyA tumane koI eksIDeMDa kiyA hai ? ___anila mere pairoM meM par3akara bolA-bhAI sAhaba ! merI galatI to nahIM hai, para phira bhI yaha saca hai ki eka eksIDeMTa mujhase ho gyaa| merI yaha bhI galatI hai ki maiM vahA~ para rukA nhiiN| maiMne socA ki rukaMgA to loga mujhe pITe binA nahIM chodd'eNgeN| ata: bhAga kara A gyaa| aba jo kucha karanA ho, so kara lo| Apake hAthoM piTakara mujhe duHkha nahIM hogaa| ___maiM rameza ke aiksIDeMTa kI bAta to bhUla gayA aura socane lagAkyA hamArA jIvana aparAdhoM kA eka silasilA hI hai ? kyA hama eka aparAdha ko pakar3ane ke lie dUsarA aparAdha karate rahate haiM ? aba rameza kA eksIDeMTa karane vAle sAikila-sabAra ke prati merA gussA kucha ThaNDA ho gyaa| maiMne usase kahA, bhAI sAhaba ! Apane jo galatI kI hai, usase bhI bar3IgalatI anila kI hai| anila merA bhAI hai ataH maiM bhI usakI ora se mAphI mAMgatA huuN| para bhAI hone mAtra se usakA aparAdha kama nahIM ho jaataa| vAstava meM hamArA rASTrIya caritra hI aisA ho gayA hai ki hama nAgarikatA ke niyamoM kA pAlana nahIM krte| maiM Apa donoM se isase bar3hakara aura kucha nahIM kaha sakatA ki hameM mAnavatA kA pATha sIkhanA caahie| aba Apa donoM hI ghara jAyeM aura bhaviSya meM nAgarikatA kA dhyAna rkheN| ve donoM apane-apane gharoM kI ora cale ge| maiM apanI sAikila para baiThakara ghara vApasa A rahA thA aura soca rahA thA ki yadi tIsarA sAikila savAra anila nahIM hotA, to maiM kyA vyavahAra karatA ? anila ke mere bhAI hone ke nAte kyA rameza kA eksIDeMTa AyA-gayA ho sakatA hai ? kyA mere par3osI yaha nahIM samajheMge ki eka aparAdha ko dabAne ke lie maiM dUsare aparAdha ko mApha karane kA tIsarA aparAdha kara AyA huuN|

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bacata kI Adata suthAra pUsArAma apane choTe beTe harirAma se milane ke lie rAjasthAna se bambaI AyA thA / harirAma Aja se bIsa varSa pahale ambikA pharnicara meM sau rupaye mahIne kI naukarI para AyA thA / para apanI lagana tathA hastalAghava se Aja vaha Der3ha hajAra rupaye mahInA kamAtA hai / usane apane pArafron hunara ko Adhunika pariprekSya meM prastuta karane meM itanI dakSatA prApta karalI thI ki usake hAtha kA sparza pAkara kATha kA Tukar3A jaise jIvana prApta kara letA hai / hAMlAki vaha eka naukara ke rUpa meM kAma karatA thA, para apane vyavahAra se usane apane mAlikoM tathA sahayogiyoM kA samAna Adara prApta kara rakhA thA / usakI kalA kI badaulata hI ambikA pharnIcara bambaI meM hI prasiddha nahIM thA, apitu videzoM se bhI use aneka ArDara milate the / kaMpanI ke mAlika kamalakumAra usI ke gAMva ke hI rahane vAle the / eka bAra jaba ve apane gA~va ( rAjasthAna ) gae to unhoMne harirAma ke aMdara soye kalAkAra ko bhAMpa liyA aura use apane sAtha bambaI le Aye / harirAma yahAM saba taraha se prasanna thA / vaha bahuta cAhatA thA ki usakA bUDhA bApa eka bAra bambaI Akara apanI A~khoM apane putra kI kalA - kuzalatA tathA mAna-sammAna ko dekhe / pUsArAma isI preraNA se yahA~ AyA thA / kamalakumAra to choTI umra meM hI bambaI A gayA thA / pahale usake pitA jI seTha mAyArAmajI rAjasthAna meM hI rahate the, para jaba kamalakumAra kA kAma bambaI meM bahuta bar3ha gayA to seThajI ko bhI bambaI bulA liyA gyaa| yahAM unake pAsa koI kAma nahIM thA / bUDhA AdamI svAbhAvika rUpa se bAta karanA cAhatA hai, para bambaI meM aisA kauna vyakti milatA jise bAta karane kI

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bacata kI Adata / 41 phursata ho! saba apane kAma meM itane vyastha rahate haiM ki dUsaroM kI ora AMkha uThAnA bhI muzkila hai| phira bhASA kI bhI eka kaThinAI thI / seTha jI TheTha rAjasthAnI bolate the| bambaI meM rAjasthAnI bolane vAlA kauna milatA ? isake atirikta purAnI pIr3hI ke logoM ke lie bambaI kA unmukta jIvana bhI eka sira darda bana jAtA hai| isIlie seThajI ko bambaI kA jIvana rAsa nahI AtA thaa| ve to apane gAMva meM hI rahanA cAhate the, para unake beTe-pote bambaI meM raheM to ve akele gAMva meM kaise raha sakate the ? ataH unheM mana masosa kara yahIM rahanA par3atA thaa| para jaba se pUsArAma bambaI AyA taba se seThajI bar3e prasanna rahate the| na to pUsArAma ko koI kAma thA aura na seTha jI ko| ataH ve ghaMToM baiThe rahate aura apane gAMva kI purAnI yAdoM meM kho jAte / kabhI kue kI bAta calatI to kabhI tAlAba aura bUr3he pIpala kI, kabhI nAI -kumhAra kI bAta calatI to kabhI kisI seTha seThAnI kI / isI silasile meM seTha jI ne kahA-pUsArAma ! kyA tuma jAnate ho ki tumhAre aura mere jIvana meM yaha jo antara A gayA hai, isakA rAja kyA hai ? pUsArAma ne kahA-seTha jI! isake to aneka kAraNa haiM, para sabase bar3A eka kAraNa hai ki Apa bhAgyavAna haiM / seThajI-hAM yaha to ThIka haiM ki bhAgya bar3I cIja hai, para yadi AdamI prayatna na kare to kucha bhI nahI ho sktaa| saca pUchA jAye to yaha sArI karAmAta unnIsa so chiyAnave kI hai| tumako yAda hogA ki usa sAla phasala kitanI tagar3I huI thii| vaha kisI eka AdamI ke bhAgya kA savAla nahIM thaa| usa sAla hara AdamI ke khetoM meM itanA anAja paidA huA thA ki sameTe nahI simaTatA thA / usa sAla tumhAre bhI pAMca sau mana bAjarI huI thI, mere bhI pA~ca sau mana huI thii| hamAre koThe bhara gae the| tumane usa sAla apane bApa kA mRtyu bhoja kiyA thA / AsapAsa ke kitane loga Aye the tumhAre daravAje para ! tumane bhI kyA dila khola kara kAma kiyA thA / usadina jaba loga tumhArI vAha-vAhI kara rahe the to mujhe bhI lagA ki tuma kitane saubhAgyazAlI ho / yadyapi jaba tumane mujha

Page #43
42 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI se mRtyu-bhoja karane kI rAya lI thI to maine to yahI kahA thA -~~-mA~-bApa kA karjA cukAnA jarUrI hai, ata: thor3e bahuta brAhmaNoM ko bhoja karavAdo, thor3e gAMva ke pramukha logoM ko bulAlo / para tumane kahA thA ki seThajI ! bApa koI bAra bAra thor3e hI maratA hai ? isa varSa bhagavAn kI hama para meharabAnI ho gaI haiM, to mujhe bhI dila kholakara apana bApa kA mRtyu-bhoja karanA hai / tumane bAta nahIM mAnI aura jo phasala huI thI, use dAva para lagA diyaa| ulTe mere se hajAra rUpaye karja bhI liye| maiM tumhArI nA samajhI para haMsA thA / para jaba sArA gAMva tumhAre daravAje para ikaTThA huaa| brAhmaNoM ne tumhAre kilaka nikAlA / paMcoM ne tumheM pagar3I pahanAI to eka bAra to mere mana meM bhI AyA ki maiM bhI apane bApa kA mRtyu-bhoja kara daM, para meM vaisA nahIM kara skaa| phira usa sAla phasala se jo paisA milA use lekara kamalakumAra bambaI A gyaa| para bhAI ! saca pUcho to Aja jo merI hAlata haiM usakA zrI gaNeza usI sAla huA thaa| unhIM rupayoM se kamala kumAra ne ambikA pharnInara kA kAma zurU kiyA thaa| usake bAda mere po-bAraha paccIsa ho ge| dekha,mere ghara kA phleTa ho gayA, kAra ho gaI, kArakhAnA ho gyaa| bhagavAna kI marjI se saba kucha cala ThIka rahA hai, para pUsArAma ! eka bAta kahatA hU~ ki kamala ke chokaroM meM kiphAyata-sArI nahIM hai| yadyapi kamala to phira bhI kucha kiphAyata karatA hai / isake chokaroM meM to bilkula hI kiphAyata sArI nahIM hai| roja itanA byartha kA kharca karate haiM ki kahane kI bAta nahIM / aba tuma hI dekho, 100-150 rupaye to inakA jebakharca hai| yaha ThIka hai ki Aja unakI kamAI hai, para sadA dina eka sarIkhe nahIM raha skte| AdamI dhanavAn hotA hai to kamAne se nahIM bacAne se hotA hai| maiM ina chokaroM ko kahUM to ulTe merI hI majAka ur3Ate haiN| kahate haiM ki dAdA jI ! tuma purAne jamAne ke AdamI ho| hameM apanI sosAiTI dekhanI par3atI hai| isa sosAiTI ke pIche inameM aneka gaMdI AdateM A gaI haiN| mujhe Dara

Page #44
bacata kI Adata / 43 lagatA hai ki bhagavAna inakI naiyA kaise pAra lgaayegaa| para bhAI ! tumhArA harirAma bahuta acchA lar3akA hai / saca pUcho to hama ise lAye to tumhAre bApa ke mRtyu-bhoja kA karjA cukAne ke lie the, para isane na kevala karjA hI cukatA kara diyA hai apitu kucha paisA jor3a bhI liyA hai| yaha sau kamAtA thA to pacAsa bacAtA thaa| hajAra kamAtA hai to pAMca sau bacAtA hai| mujhe isakI Adata bar3I acchI lagatI hai| kyA tumheM bhI ghara kucha paisA bhejatA hai ? - seTha jI ! bhejane ko to yaha bheja sakatA hai / eka-do bAra bhejA bhI thA, para maiMne manA kara diyaa| abhI taka mere hAthapAMva calate haiN| do beTe mere pAsa haiM hii| hama apanA kAma vahA~ calA lete haiM / hama to itane se hI. bahuta prasanna haiM ki isane merA karjA utAra diyA / aba yadi yaha do paisA bacAtA hai to Age sukha paayegaa| maiMne kabhI bacAnA nahIM siikhaa| Apane ThIka hI kahA hai ki maiMne bApa ke mRtyu-bhoja meM bahuta paisA kharca kara diyA, para merA yaha choTA lar3akA supAtra hai / isane merA karjA utAra diyA, para yaha to isakI bacapana kI Adata hai| maiMne to ise khaira kyA diyA hai, para jaba bhI ise do paise milate to yaha eka paisA bacAtA thaa| hamako aba isake paise kI jarUrata nahIM haiN| yaha ArAma se kamAye aura ArAma se khAye / hama to bhagavAna se yahI prArthanA karate haiM ki bAla-bacce lAyaka ho jaayeN| isane to hamAre bar3e beTe ke chokaroM ko bhI yahA~ bulA kara hoziyAra kara diyA hai| aba hameM isase bar3ha kara aura kyA cAhie ? phira Apa jaise logoM kI chatrachAyA hai| kamala bAbU ne ise do AdamiyoM ke bIca baiThane ke lAyaka banA diyaa| yaha bhI kyA kama bAta hai ? hama Apake upakAra ko janma bhara nahIM bhuuleNge| maiM to kamala bAbU aura harirAma donoM ko AzISa detA hU~ ki ye nekaniyatI se caleM aura apane bApa-dAdoM ke nAma ko rozana kreN| yaha kahate-kahate phUsArAma kI A~khoM meM se harSa ke A~sU uchala Aye / seTha mAyArAma ko bhI Aja lambe arse se dila

Page #45
44 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI kholakara bAta karane kA maukA milA thA ataH unakI A~khoM meM bhI harSa ke A~sU uchala Aye / sacamuca bUr3hA hRdaya hI dUsare bUr3he ke hRdaya kI pIr3A ko jAnatA hai / phasArAma bambaI meM eka mahIne rahA / usake dina kA adhika bhAga seTha mAyArAma ke sAtha bAtoM meM hI gujaratA / mAyArAma kA to mAno bacapana hI lauTa AyA thaa| usane apane gAMva kI eka-eka bAta ko khodakhoda kara puuchaa| kheta-khalihAna se lekara hATa-havelI taka kI aura cAkara se lekara ThAkara taka kI sArI bAteM khulakara huii| ye saba bAteM karate use itanA Ananda AtA ki usake sAmane sinemA aura TI0vI0 kA Ananda bhI phIkA-sA anubhava hotA thaa| jaba phUsArAma calA gayA to seThajI ko eka bahuta bar3I riktatA kI anubhUti huii| ___ pA~ca varSoM ke bAda phira eka aisA avasara AyA, jaba pUsArAma bambaI aayaa| ambikA pharnIcara aba harirAma ke pAsa A gayA thaa| phUsArAma usake muhUrta ke avasara para hI yahA~ AyA thaa| yadyapi ambikA pharnIcara ke svAmitva meM antara A gayA thaa| vaha kamalakumAra se haTakara harirAma ke pAsa A gayA thA, para seTha mAyArAma aura phUsArAma ke mana meM koI antara nahIM aayaa| vaha pahale hI kI taraha roja seThajI ke pAsa jAtA aura ghaMToM bAtoM meM kho jaataa| harirAma ke lie kamalakumAra aba koI mahatva nahIM rakhate the, para pUsArAma ke lie seTha mAyArAma vahI mahatva rakhate the jo pahale rakhate the| badalI huI paristhiti meM jaba vaha seTha jI ke pAsa baiThatA to unheM aura adhika acchA lagatA / roja-roja kI bAtacIta meM seThajI ne phUsArAma ko batAyA ki pote phijUlakharcI se kisa taraha vyasana-grasta ho gye| gaMde logoM ke samparka se inakI AdateM bigar3a gaI aura dhIre-dhIre kAma para se pakar3a kamajora hotI gii| aizaArAma aura mauja-majoM tathA yAra dostoM ne unheM itanA gumarAha kara diyA ki unake lie ambikA pharnIcara ko sambhAlanA bhArI par3a gyaa| yadyapi kamalakumAra ne kucha sAiDa bijanesa aura zurU kara diyA thA, isalie hama bhikhArI banane se baca gae, para hamArI jo sthiti ambikA pharnIcara se thI vaha aba nahIM raha gii| harirAma ne samaya-samaya para inheM bahuta sAvadhAna

Page #46
bacata kI Adata / 45 kiyA thA, para phira bhI ye saMbhala na paaye| isakA natIjA yaha huA ki kArakhAnA hamAre hAthoM se nikala gyaa| yaha durbhAgya aba bhI samApta nahIM huA hai| jo Adata eka bAra par3a jAtI hai vaha miTanI bar3I muzkila hai / na jAne ava hamArA kyA hogA ? para bhAI ! mujhe khuzI hai ki kArakhAnA harirAma ke hAtha A gyaa| hamAre se to vaha jAne kA hI thA, para harirAma ne kucha paise jamAkara lie, isase vaha dUsaroM ke hAthoM meM jAne se baca gyaa| aba to tumhAre sabhI pote bhI usI meM kAma karane lage haiN| phUsArAma-yaha paisA to phirata-ghirata kI chAyA hai| kabhI idhara AtA hai to kabhI udhara / para itanA taya hai ki lakSmI TikatI usI ke pAsa hai, jo bacata karanA jAnatA hai| jo bacata karanA nahIM jAnatA usake pAsa bhale lAkhoM rupaye kyoM na ho jAeM para ve Tika nahIM sakeMge aura bacata karane vAlA AdamI paisA-paisA bacAkara bhI lakhapatI bana sakatA hai| seThajI, tumhArA aura hamArA sambandha paise kA nahIM hai| tuma hamAre gAMva ke seTha ho| hama hamezA tumhAre sAmane jhukate hI rheNge|

Page #47
anakaraNa hindustAna meM akasara lar3akiyA~ hInatAgrasta bAtAvaraNa meM hI janmatI, aura palatI-puSatI haiN| lar3akA bhale hI Age jAkara nAlAyaka hI kyoM na nikala jAya, jaise ki adhikAMza nikalate haiM, para unakA jisa utsukatA se svAgata hotA hai utanA lar3akI kA nahIM hotaa| kahIM-kahIM to unheM janmate hI mAra diyA jAtA hai| jahA~ ve zarIra se z2indA raha jAtI haiM, vahAM dhIre-dhIre unakI AtmA mara jAtI hai| yadyapi Upara se ve haMsatIkhelatI dikhAI detI haiM, para andara se unameM jo eka hIna bhAvanA ghara kara jAtI hai vaha unameM svatantra vyaktitva ko ubharane nahIM detii| puruSa ne unakI hIna bhAvanA ko alaMkAra banAne kI koziza kI hai, para jisa bojha ke nIce ve daba jAtI haiM vaha kama nahIM hotA hai, apitu dhIre-dhIre bar3hatA hI jAtA hai| para kamalA isa abhizApa se mukta thii| usakA eka kAraNa to yaha thA ki vaha cAra bhAiyoM kI ikalautI lADalI bahana thii| usase bhI bar3A kAraNa yaha thA ki usake Agamana ke sAtha hI parivAra kI paristhiti kA Azcaryajanaka DhaMga se kAyA palaTa ho gyaa| jisa varSa usakA janma huA thA usa varSa se parivAra ko na kevala akalpita artha lAbha hI huA thA, AnandadAyaka sammAna bhI prApta huA thaa| sadA bImAra rahane vAlI kamalA kI mA~ to usa varSa se apane Apa svastha rahane lgii| usake dAdA pyAra se usako kamalA nahIM kaha kara kamala hI kahate the| yadyapi kamalA (lakSmI) tathA kamala (phUla) kA artha-bheda unheM mAlUma thA, balki kamalA ne yaha abhidhAna bhI isIlie pAyA thA ki vaha ghara meM dhana kI devI kA rUpa grahaNa kare, para phira bhI dAdA ke avacetana saMskAroM ke putratva ne putrItva ko harA

Page #48
anukaraNa | 47 diyaa| isalie kamalA kamala bana gii| kamalA ke lie isakA koI matalaba nahIM thA ki vaha kamalA banakara jIye yA kamala banakara jIye / para itanA saca hai ki sAre parivAra meM usakA ekachatra sAmrAjya thaa| samaya para usake bhAiyoM kI koI icchA apUrNa raha jAtI thI, para kamalA kI koI icchA apUrNa nahIM rhtii| vaha yadi ghara meM koI tor3a-phor3a bhI kara detI to kisI ko asaha ya nahIM lagatI thii| vaha yadi kabhI jarA sI ro bhI detI to tatkSaNa dAdA kA roSa pUrNa svara gUMja uThatA--kyA bAta hai, kamala kyoM ro rahA hai ? dAdA jahAM bhI jAte use apane sAtha le jAte / bhojana to vaha usake binA karate hI nahIM the / yahI kAraNa thA ki kamalA ne kabhI apane nanihAla kA mukha taka nahIM dekhA / nAnA-nAnI, mAmA-mAmI bicAre usakI eka jhalaka dekhane ke lie tarasate rahate the, para isa ke lie unheM svayaM kamalA ke ghara hI AnA par3atA thaa| isakA yaha artha nahIM hai ki kamalA ucchRkhala thii| bahuta bAra unmukta vAtAvaraNa AdamI ko ucchRkhala banA detA hai para kamalA kI hara ucchRkhalatA meM bhI eka zAlInatA hotI thii| yahI kAraNa thA ki vaha jisa ora se nikala jAtI usa ora se mAyUsI havA ho jAtI thii| sabhI loga usakI sannidhi se jaise praphulla ho uThate the| usakI aspaSTa jabAna sabako itanI pyArI lagatI thI ki hara koI usase bAta karanA cAhatA thaa| apanI bAla-sulabha capalatA se baha hara eka kA mana moha letii| balki kabhI-kabhI to vaha aisI bAta kaha detI thI, jisase na kevala ghara ke loga khilakhilA uThate the, apitu usakI gaharAI meM DUba jAte the / kamalA ghara meM ghaTane vAlI hara ghaTanA kA bar3I sUkSmatA se adhyayana karatI thii| yahI to vaha avasthA hai jaba AdamI kA vAstavika nirmANa hotA hai| isa avasthA meM use jaisA dekhane-sunane ko milatA hai, vahI usake jIvana kA aMga bana jAtA hai / bAda meM makAna ke raMga-rogana meM bhale hI parivartana A sakatA hai, para jo nIMva isa avasthA meM par3a jAtI hai vaha sthira bana jAtI hai| para vAtAvaraNa ke sAtha-sAtha eka savAla yaha bhI hai ki baccA kisa satarkatA yA manodazA se use grahaNa karatA hai| kabhI-kabhI bure vAtAvaraNa ke bhI acche saMskAra tathA acche vAtAvaraNa ke bhI galata

Page #49
48 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI saMskAra baccoM meM dekhane ko milate haiM / aisA kyoM hotA hai, yaha eka bahuta hI gaharA savAla hai / nizcaya hI usake kucha adRzya kAraNa haiM / ve adRzya kAraNa kyA haiM isakA dArzanika vicAraka loga alaga-alaga DhaMga se vicAra karate haiM, para itanA taya hai ki hara kArya kA adRzya kAraNa zraMkhalA ke sAtha jur3e rahane ke bAda bhI usake prakaTa hone ke apane kucha nimitta avazya hote haiM / ve nimitta AdamI ko apane vAtAvaraNa se hI prApta hote haiM / kucha vyaktiyoM ke lie ve nimitta zubha kA hetu bana jAte haiM, kucha vyaktiyoM ke lie a azubha kA hetu bana jAte haiM / kucha baccoM meM ve koI bhI sthAyI pratibimba nahIM banA pAte, para kamalA hara ghaTanA ko itanI bArIkI se dekhatI aura grahaNa karatI ki sabhI Azcarya cakita raha jAte / yadyapi usakI avasthA 3-4 varSa kI hI thI, para usake hisAba se usakA sArA jIvana nizcita ho cukA thaa| yahAM taka ki apanI buA kI barAta meM Aye hue phUphA ke hama umra choTe bhAI ko usane apane pati ke rUpa meM svIkAra kara liyA thA / vaha bahuta hI sahajatA ke sAtha saba ke sAmane isa mAnasika saMskAra ko svIkAra karatI thI / isakA yaha artha nahIM hai ki yaha sambandha taya ho gayA thA, para apane sAmane Ane vAle hara bimba ko vaha kitanI sajagatA se pratibimbita karatI thI, yaha usakA eka udAharaNa thA / isI taraha hara eka ghaTanA usake mana para apanA kucha sthAyI - asthAyI prabhAva chor3a jAtI thI / usake ghara meM eka hI snAnAgAra thA / jaba bhI koI snAna ke lie jAtA to aMdara se bAtha rUma ko baMda kara letA thA / kamalA ko bhI aneka bAra sahajatA hI snAnAgAra meM jAne kA maukA milatA thA / jaba bhI vaha kisI ke sAtha bAtha rUma meM jAtI to dekhatI ki aMdara jAkara hara eka daravAjA lagAkara kapATa ke bIca meM lagI huI ciTakanI ko car3hA detA hai / yadyapi roja use dAdA-dAdI mA~ yA naukarAnI Adi snAna karavAte 1 the / para eka dina usako bhI apane-Apa snAna karane kA zauka carrAyA / usane tauliyA hAtha meM liyA aura snAnAghara meM ghusa gaI / usakI anukaraNa priya vRtti kA yahIM anta nahIM huA, apitu andara jAkara usane ciTakanI bhI car3hA dI / yadyapi ciTakanI taka pahu~cane meM use kAphI takalIpha huI /

Page #50
anukaraNa / 46 apane paira kI aMguliyoM ke bala para khar3e hokara kisI prakAra usana ciTakanI car3hA dI aura maje se aMdara snAna karane lagI / thor3I dera meM usakI mammI bhI snAna karane ke lie snAnaghara AI / aMdara daravAjA baMda dekhakara usane AvAja dI-aMdara kauna hai ? kamalA ne khuzI meM jhUmate hue kahA - mammI maiM abhI snAna kara rahI hUM / tU bAda AnA / mAM ko yaha sunakara haMsI A gii| vicAra karane lagI- bitte bhara kI yaha chokarI bhI ajIba hai / abhI taka pUre kar3e pahanane nahIM Ate haiM, to bhI bar3oM kI cAla calatI hai| usane bAhara khar3e-khar3e hI kahA - basa, ho gayA tumhArA snAna / aba daravAjA khola / kamalA ne phira kahA nahIM, abhI nahIM, thor3I dera hai / para jaba mAM ne daravAjA pITanA zurU kara diyA to Akhira use uThakara daravAjA kholane ke lie vivaza honA pdd'aa| jyoM hI vaha daravAjA kholane lagI ki ciTakanI kaThora ho gaI / vaha bAra-bAra aMguliyoM para khar3I hokara daravAjA kholane kA prayAsa karane lagI, para ciTakanI Tasa se masa nahIM ho rahI thI / usakA bAla- viveka hAra gayA aura vaha rone lgii| mAM ne bAhara khar3e-khar3e jaba usakA ronA sunA to gusse meM hokara bolI - zaitAna kahIM kI, yadi daravAjA nahIM khulatA hai to aMdara ghusI hI kyoM thI ? bAhara nikala, Aja terI marammata karUMgI | yaha sunate hI usakA rahA-sahA viveka bhI guma ho gayA aura vaha besudha hokara aMdara hI gira pdd'ii| dhamAke kI AvAja suna kara usakI mAM ke hoza bhI guma ho ge| vaha jora-jora se AvAja dene lagI, para kamalA to aba hoza meM hI kahAM thI, jo uttara detI / mAM ne Asa-pAsa sahAyatA ke lie pukArA to dAdI aaii| usane bhI AvAjeM lagAIM, para aMdara to mauna kA gaharA sannATA chAyA huA thaa| eka-do minaTa bhI nahIM huA thA ki isa akalpita AdhAta se kamalA kI mAM bhI behoza hokara gira par3I / aba to ghara meM kuharAma maca gayA / koI DAkTara kI ora daur3A to koI suthAra kI ora / koI bajaraMgabalI kI manautI manAne lagA to koI zaMkara bhagavAna kI / kamalA ke dAdA ko yaha samAcAra milA to ve bhI daur3a kara Aye / eka kSaNa ve bhI kiMkartavyavimUr3ha raha gae / ve socane

Page #51
50 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI lage-Aja yaha kyA ho gayA ! unhoMne Ava dekhA na tAva pAsa meM hI musala par3A huA thaa| uThAkara use hI snAnaghara ke daravAje para de maaraa| do-cAra dhamAkoM meM hI plAivuDa kA daravAjA TUTa gayA, aMdara kamala behoza par3I huI thii| dAdA ne use uThAkara chAtI se cipakA liyaa| unakI AMkhoM meM AMsU bahane lage / unakA hRdaya bhI itanA jora se dhar3akane lagA ki kahIM kamalA se pahale koI dUsarI ghaTanA na ghaTa jaaye| dAdI ne kamalA kI mAM ko sNbhaalaa| donoM para ThaMDA pAnI chir3a kA gyaa| havA kI gaI taba jAkara kahIM donoM ko hoza aayaa| jaba usane apanI AMkheM kholI to dAdA ne pUchA - beTA, tUM aMdara gaI hI kyoM thI ? tujhe snAna karanA thA, to mujhe kahanA cAhie thaa| __kamalA ne atyaMta sahajatA se kahA - dAdA, aba to maiM bar3I ho gaI huuN| aba mujhe apane-Apa hI snAna karanA caahie| dAdA--para aMdara jAkara ta ne daravAjA baMda kyoM kiyA ? kamalA-vAha, daravAjA kyA maiM akelI baMda karatI hUM ? tuma bhI to roja daravAjA baMda karate ho ? phira mujhe hI kyoM kahate ho? sAre ghara meM haMsI kA eka phavvArA chUTa gyaa| kSaNa bhara pahale jo gaharI udAsI chA gaI thI, vaha jaise kamalA ke eka bola se ur3a gii|

Page #52
nae maMdira : nae pujArI jaba se bhAkhar3A kI bijalI milanI zurU huI hai, rAjasthAna ke gAMva aura kasbe rozanI se jagamagA rahe haiN| TIloM se ghire aise gA~va, jahAM manuSya kA pahu~ca pAnA bhI kaThina thA, vahA~ aba bijalI pahu~ca cukI hai| pahuMca hI nahIM cukI hai, apitu aba to vahA~ ke jIvana ke sAtha usakA itanA tAdAtmya ho gayA hai ki eka dina bhI bijalI na Ae to loga parezAna najara Ane lagate haiN| pahale jina gharoM meM miTTI ke dIye bhI nahIM jalate the, aba vahAM bijalI ke laTTa jagamagA rahe haiN| nizcaya hI isake kucha lAbha haiM, para sAtha hI sAtha kucha alAbha bhI avatAra lene lage haiN| purAne jamAne ke loga bijalI-pAnI Adi ke liye varuNa-indra Adi devoM kI pUjA kiyA karate the| aba unakA sthAna dhIre-dhIre yaMtra lete jA rahe haiN| paNDita javAharalAla neharU ne eka bA~dha kA udghATana karate hue ThIka hI kahA thA--aba hama naye tIrtha-sthAnoM kA nirmANa karane jA rahe haiN| purAne tIrthasthAnoM kA mahatva dhIre-dhIre kama hotA jA rahA hai aura ye nae tIrtha loka-jIvana kI dhar3akana banate jA rahe haiM / sAre deza meM, gA~va-gA~va meM inhIM tIrthoM se sambandhita pAvara hAusa Adi ke rUpa meM naye maMdira bhI banane lage haiN| jisa prakAra zAdI-vivAha ke avasara para purAne jamAne meM mandiroM meM meM paMDe-pujAriyoM ko prasAda car3hAnA Avazyaka hotA thA, usI prakAra Ajakala ina naye maMdiroM meM kAma karane vAle karmacAriyoM ko prasAda, car3hAnA Avazyaka ho gayA hai / ___ seTha cimanIrAmajI ko pahale isa bAta kA jJAna nahIM thaa| hotA bhI kaise ? ve to dUra baMgAla meM apanA vyavasAya karate the| kisI vizeSa avasara para hI ve rAjasthAna meM apane kasbe meM AyA karate the| aba bhI ve

Page #53
'52 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI apanI putrI kI zAdI karane ke lie hI idhara Ae the / paise kI inake pAsa koI kamI nahIM thii| bar3I dhUmadhAma se ve apanI lar3akI kI zAdI kara rahe the| gA~va ke sabhI loga isa avasara para kisI na kisI rUpa meM lAbhAnvita ho rahe the,ata: cAroM ora harSollAsa kA vAtAvaraNa chAyA huA thaa| seThajI bhI khUba khule hAtha se paisA pheMka rahe the| para gAMva ke naye maMdira pAvara-hAusa kI ora unakA dhyAna nahIM gyaa| pAvara hAusa ke bAbU ne eka vyakti ke mAdhyama se seThajI kA dhyAna AkarSita kiyA bhI, para seThajI ne kahA - are usako to phira dekha leMge / yadyapi seThajI kA yaha vicAra nahIM thA ki pAvara hAusa ke vAbU kI upekSA kI jaaye| jaba ve itanA paisA kharca kara rahe the to isa choTI sI bAta ke lie bhalA ve usako kyoM nArAja karate? para unakA khyAla thA ki zAdI ho jAne ke bAda ve usako rAjI kara deNge| zAdI kI sArI taiyAriyA~ ho gii| maMDapa bhI bana gyaa| bijalI se itanA sajAyA gayA thA use ki kosoM taka usakI balba-paMkti logoM kA dhyAna AkarSita kara rahI thii| khAroM ora yahI carcA dhI-aisI sajAvaTa to kabhI nahIM haI / hotI bhI to kahAM se ? yahAM bijalI ko Ae hue laMbA samaya nahIM huA / seThajI apanI isa prazaMsA se bahuta prasanna ho rahe the| unheM zAyada isa bAta se koI sarokAra nahIM thA ki yahI bijalI udyogoM meM lagakara kitanA utpAdana bar3hA sakatI thii| manuSya apane ahaMkAra ke tuccha ghere ko tor3akara Age nahIM bar3ha pAtA hai, tabhI ADambara panapate haiN| ___ pAvara hAusa para bAbU lambe samaya taka apanI bheMTa-pUjA kI pratIkSA karatA rhaa| aba to bhAta kA atima dina bhI A cukA thaa| Aja bhI usa ke ghara miThAI kA prasAda nahIM pahuMcA thaa| usane socA-baniyAM mujhe dhokhA de rahA hai| Age kI vAta kaha kara zAdI ke bAda vaha mujhe yoM hI TarakA denA cAhatA hai / bhalA svastha ho jAne ke bAda koI bImAra DAkTara ko bulAtA hai ? Aja kA avasara hI aMtima avasara hai| yadi Aja kucha nahIM ho sakA, to phira kucha nahIM ho sakegA / rAta kA samaya ho cukA thaa| maMDapa ke cAroM ora bijaliyAM camakane lgiiN| aisA laga hI nahIM

Page #54
nae mandira : nae pujArI / 53 rahA thA ki abhI rAta hai| bArAta ke bhojana kA samaya ho cukA thaa| bArAtI loga bhojana karane baiThe hI the ki itane meM sArI battiyAM eka sAtha gula ho gii| cAroM ora hAhAkAra maca gyaa| eka-do gaisa kI battI idhara-udhara thI, use lAyA gyaa| jidhara se gaisa kI battI calI jAtI, udhara aMdherA ghuppa ho jAtA thaa| loga burI taraha cillA rahe the| bArAtI bicAre baiThe raha ge| paMkhe banda ho ge| saba garmI se burI taraha parezAna hone lge| aise samaya meM badamAzoM kI bana AtI hai| miThAI ke kaI ghAme-curiye idhara-udhara ho gae / naukaroM ne bhI hAtha sApha karanA zurU kara diyaa| seThajI to jaise sanna raha ge| ghara ke andara bhI koharAma maca gayA thaa| auratoM ne apane anumAna lagAne zurU kara die / kisI ne kahA--- dekhA na ! gaNeza jI kI pUjA nahIM kI, usI kA yaha pariNAma hai| kisI ne kahA-satI mAtA ko yAda nahIM kiyA, usI kA yahI pariNAma hai| para seThajI samajha rahe the yaha bijalIghara ke nAga kI pUjA nahIM kI usI kA pariNAma hai| unhoMne tatkSaNa bahuta sArI miThAI dekara eka vizvasta AdamI ko pAvara hAusa ke bAbU ke ghara bhejaa| udhara usI kSaNa jenereTara kA kharAba purjA ThIka ho gyaa| seThajI socane lage, purAne devatA to phala dene meM kabhI vilamba bhI kara dete the, para nae devatA isa mAmale meM custa haiN| kama se kama apanI bheMTa-pUjA pAkara kAma to ThIka kara dete haiN|

Page #55
bandhana aura mukti kabUtara ke baccoM kA eka jor3A prazikSaNa ke daurAna apane mAtApitA ke sAtha AhAra kI khoja meM ghUma rahA thA / yadyapi unake paMkha aba kAphI khula cuke the, para phira bhI khule AkAza meM ve eka sImita ur3Ana hI bhara sakate the| unake jIvana kA yaha svarNima yuga thA, jisameM ve apane mAtA-pitA se kucha mahattvapUrNa gura sIkha rahe the / vaise kucha bAteM eka avasthA ke bAda prANiyoM meM apane Apa prakaTa ho jAtI haiM, para mAM-bApa yaha avazya hI cAhate haiM ki ve apanI vaha sArI jAnakArI apane baccoM meM saMkrAnta kara deM, jo svayaM unameM haiN| isIlie kabhI mAM aura kabhI bApa sakriya rUpa se donoM baccoM ko sikhA rahe the ki kisa prakAra AhAra kI khoja karanI cAhie ? kisa prakAra dAnoM ko coMca meM pakar3anA cAhie ? kisa prakAra dAnA cugate samaya bhI cAroM ora se satarka rahanA cAhie ? yahA~ taka ki kisa prakAra AkramaNa karanA cAhie aura kisa prakAra dUsare ke AkramaNa ko viphala karanA cAhie ? pazu-pakSiyoM kA sArA prazikSaNa anukaraNAtmaka hI hotA hai, para phira bhI kahIM-kahIM saMketoM dvArA bhI kucha bAteM samajhAnA Avazyaka ho jAtA hai / ata: isa daurAna unakI apanI guTu ragaM kI bhASA kA upayoga bhI kiyA jA rahA thaa| isI bIca acAnaka bakce vahA~ biche hue jAla ke nikaTa A pahu~ce / jAla meM acche dAne bikhare hue the, ataH unheM dekha baccoM kA mana lalacA uThA / __ acchA to yahI hotA ki ve jAla kI ora bar3hane ke pahale apane mAM-bApa kA saMketa prApta kara lete| para jinake lie bhojana hI eka bar3A lAlaca hotA hai bhojana dIkha jAne ke bAda unake lie apane para niyaMtraNa ___

Page #56
vandhana aura mukti / 55 rakha pAnA bar3A kaThina hotA hai / jaba manuSya bhI bhojana ke sAmane apane Adarza ko bhUla jAtA hai, to pakSI ko doSa denA zAyada upayukta nahIM hogA / isalie eka avaza AkarSaNa se grasta hokara donoM bacce jAla kI ora bar3hane lage aura usase pahale ki mAM-bApa kA dhyAna udhara jAtA, ve dAla meM kUde / tatkSaNa baTamAra ne jAla kI DorI khIMca lI / donoM bacce jAla meM baMdha kara karuNa krandana karane lage / isa sthAna para yadi koI AdamI hotA to vaha socatA ki kyoM mujhe yoM bekasUra pakar3a liyA gayA ? kyA bhojana kI khoja karanA bhI koI aparAdha ho sakatA haiM ? svayaM baTamAra ne jo dAne bikhera rakhe the kyA ve kisI ke lie eka mUka AmaMtraNa nahIM thA ? para manuSya svayaM bhI aksara aise cakkara meM phaMsatA hai / yaha dUsarI bAta hai ki apane sthAna para vaha saba tarkoM ko bhUla jAtA hai| una anajAna pakSiyoM ke lie to yaha socanA bhI akalpanIya thA / phira bhI baMdhana unako bhI priya thA / isalie ve chUTane ke lie tIvra saMgharSa karane lage / unakI karuNa pukAra ne mAM bApa kA dhyAna bhI khiiNcaa| saMtAna ke lie sneha ke vaza meM hokara eka bAra unake mana meM unheM chur3Ane kA bhI vicAra AyA, para ve to bicAre svayaM bhI asahAya the / ataH vivaza hokara unakI ora ekaTaka dekhane lge| para jyoM hI baTamAra apane sthAna se uThA unheM bhI apane prANoM meM saMzaya hone lagA / ataH ve phurra se ur3a ge| para maiM dekha rahA thA ki ur3ate hue bhI unakI najara apane baccoM para TikI huI thii| eka kSaNa kekhie maiMne socA -- kyA bar3e hokara ye bacce inakA bharaNa-poSaNa kareMge ? nizcaya hI bar3e hokara ye apane mAM-bApa ko chor3akara apanI gRhasthI basAne ke lie anyatra cale jAyeMge yA phira apane mAM bApa ke nIr3a para hI apanA kabjA kara leMge, para kabUtara - dampatti ke sAmane ye vicAra naye nahIM the / sacamuca mAM-bApa kA prema saudebAjI kI bhASA nahIM jaantaa| unake lie saMtAna kA sukha hI apanA sukha hotA hai| isalie ve pAsa ke eka vRkSa kI DAlI para baiThakara guTagU - guTagU karane lage / yadyapi maiM unakI bhASA nahIM samajhatA thA, phira bhI merA nizcita anumAna hai ki vaha karuNa vilApa hI thA / donoM baccoM kA reDiyo bhI usI sTezana se bola rahA thA / dhIre

Page #57
56 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI dhIre mukti-saMgharSa aura teja hotA jA rahA thaa| yadyapi jAla kAphI majabUta thA, phira bhI vaha purAnA par3a gayA thA , ata: sthAna-sthAna se jIrNa ho gayA thaa| kabUtara baccoM ke niraMtara ke coMca tathA paMjoM ke prahAra se jAla kA eka dhAgA TUTa gayA aura baha eka bacce ke paMje meM aTaka kara raha gyaa| para jI-jor3a prayatna ke bAda bhI ve mukta nahIM ho ske| maiM jijIviSA ke isa prayatna meM jar3a aura cetana kA bheda spaSTa samajha rahA thA zAyada unake mana meM bhaviSya kI koI kalpanA nahIM rahI hogii| Age ve jIyeMge yA mareMge, yaha spaSTa vicAra bhI unake sAmane sAmane nahIM thA, balki isa kSaNa to ve bhUkha ko bhI bhUla gae the / unakI cetanA agara kahIM ulajhI huI thI, to vaha kevala baMdhana kI anubhUti meM hI ulajha rahI thii| unhoMne apane sampUrNa sAmarthya ko svatantratA ke dAMva para lagA diyA thA, para phira bhI ve mukta nahIM ho ske| itane meM baTamAra nikaTa aayaa| use najadIka Ate dekha donoM bacce phira kucha bhayabhIta hue unhoMne paMkhoM ko tIvratA se phdd'phdd'aayaa| yadyapi paMkha to svatantra the, para ve svayaM jAla meM phaMse hue the| ataH mukti asaMbhava thii| mujhe yaha dRzya dekhakara anukampA aaii| maiM apane-Apako roka nahIM skaa| maiMne baTamAra se kahA-bhAI ! tuma ina nirIha pakSiyoM ko jAla meM kyoM phaMsA rahe ho? mujhe Upara se nIce taka eka hairata-bharI dRSTi se dekhakara baTamAra ne kahA- lagatA hai, Apane abhI duniyA dekhI nahIM hai ? maiMne kahA-yaha to tuma ThIka kahate ho| merI apekSA tumhArI umra bar3I lagatI haiM / para umra kA akla ke sAtha koI sambandha nahIM hai| yadi tumhAre mana meM jarA bhI karuNA hotI to tuma bicAre ina nirAmiSabhojI paMchiyoM ko yoM jAla meM nahIM phA~sate / isa bAra baTamAra ke zabda jarA Ardra ho gae the / merI kalpanA ke viparIta usane kahA-bAbU ! maiM bhI to inakI hI taraha Apa jaise mahAjanoM ke jAla meM phaMsA huA huuN| mujhe to zAyada baniyA pUrA cUsa kara hI dama legA / zAyada vaha merI agalI pIr3hI ko bhI nahIM bakhsegA, para maiM inheM mArUMgA nhiiN|

Page #58
baMdhana aura mukti / 57 maiMne kahA- to phira tuma inakA kyA karoge ? usane kahA-kala hamArI svatantratA kI pacAsavIM varSa gAMTha hai , usa upalakSa meM hamAre pradhAnamaMtrI paccAsa kabUtaroM ko khule AkAza meM baMdhana mukta kareMge / ata: maiM unake lie kabUtaroM ko juTA rahA haiN| aba taka maiMne cAlIsa kabUtara to pakar3a lie haiM, kevala dasa bAkI haiN| isase jyAdA kabUtara mujhe nahIM pakar3ane haiN| mujhe usake kathana para vizvAsa nahIM haa| maiMne socA ki ye baTamAra bhI bAta banAne meM kitane mAhira ho gae haiM, para dUsare dina jaba maiM apanI chata para baiTha kara dhUpa seMka rahA thA to yaha dekhakara vismita ho gayA ki kabUtara kA vahI jor3A merI chata para dhUpa meM khela rahA hai / eka cacce ke paira meM abhI taka kala vAle baTamAra ke jAla kA eka dhAgA phaMsA huA hai| maiM socane lagA, avazya hI isa jor3e ko Aja pradhAna maMtrI ne baMdhana mukta kiyA hogA aura phira maiM svatantratA kI isa paribhASA meM kho gayA /

Page #59
sImA vivAda hama apane eka mitra ke ghara viyatanAma ke yuddha para carcA kara rahe the| carcA itanI garma ho gaI ki rUsa aura amarIkA pIche chUTa gae, hama svayaM hI tIvra vAka-yuddha meM ulajha ge| hamAre AropoM-pratyAropoM kA tumula saMgharSa cala hI rahA thA, ki acAnaka nIce se eka pille kI karNabhedI ceM-ceM kI AvAz2a sunAI dii| usa antarAla meM mujhe kuttoM para hI gussA A gayA / mere mana meM eka ucakku kutte kA citra cakkara kATane lagA jo kisI bacce ke hAtha se roTI chInakara bhAga jAtA hai / phira mujhe eka gaMdale kutte kI yAda AI jo sthAna gaMdA karanA apanA janma-siddha adhikAra mAnatA hai| aura phira mujhe eka bhauMkane vAle kutte kI yAda A gaI jo bhauMka-bhauMka kara sabakI nIMda harAma kara detA hai| anta meM maiM eka zaitAna kutte kI kalpanA karane lagA, jisake pAsa roTI khAne aura lar3ane ke sivAya aura koI kAma nahIM hotaa| inhIM saba bhAvanAoM se kuttoM ke prati merA mana roSa se bhara AyA aura socane lagA ki z2arUra koI kuttA kisI bacce ke hAtha se roTI chInakara le gayA hogaa| aba usakI marammata ho rahI hai aura vaha ceM-ceM kara rahA hai| __itane meM hamAre mitra kA choTA lar3akA daur3atA-daur3atA AyA aura bolA pApA ! mere pille ko kutte mAra rahe haiN| usakI AkRti aura bAtoM meM itanI bhAvanubhUti thI ki hama loga vahA~ rUka nahIM sake ! usI pala uThe auranicalI maMjila kI ora daudd'e| vahAM Akara dekhate haiM ki tIna-cAra tagar3e kutte eka pille para pila rahe haiN| pillA becArA akelA thA aura krUra lar3AI ke dAMva peMca bhI pUre nahIM jAnatA thaa| ataH ceM-ceM ke sivAya

Page #60
sImA vivAda / 56 usake pAsa koI upAya nahIM thA / hamane Akara bar3I muzkila se una kuttoM ko bhagAyA / ve to zAyada ise mArakara hI vizrAma lenA cAhate the para hamane Upara se patthara barasAne zurU kara die, kucha lAThiyoM ke jhapATe bhI mAre, para unakA krodha itanA tIvra thA ki kucha dera taka to hamArI mAra kI bhI koI paravAha nahIM kii| balki eka bAra to ve pille ko chor3akara hamArI ora jhptte| unhoMne socA hogA ki hama kuttoM kI lar3AI meM bIca-bacAva karane vAle ye manuSya kauna hote haiM ? para antataH hamArA gussA bhI tez2a ho gayA aura ve cAroM ora se AkramaNa se ghira ge| unakA manoratha siddha nahIM ho sakA aura vivaza hokara unheM pichale daravAz2e se bhAga jAnA par3A / bhaya ne use becaina pille kI ceM-ceM abhI taka cala rahI thI / vaha bilakula adhamarA ho cukA thA, balki kahanA cAhie ki vaha antima sAMseM gina rahA thA / hamAre mitra ko cintA huI ki yaha kahIM makAna meM hI antima sAMsa na tor3a de | ataH use bhagAne ke lie lakar3I dikhAI / pillA adhamarA ho cukA thA, phira bhI usameM kucha dama zeSa thA / mAra ke kara diyA thA, para jyoM hI vaha bhAgane ke lie uThA dUsarI aura lur3haka gyaa| phira uThane kI koziza kI to isa ora lur3haka gayA ! usakI haDDiyoM kA DhAMcA caramarA gayA thA aura sthAna-sthAna se khUna nikala rahA thA / aba use roTI kA lAlaca dikhAyA gayA, para vaha darda ke mAre itanA pIr3ita thA ki usane roTI ko sUMghA taka nahIM / Akhira usapara pAnI chir3akA gayA ki zAyada isase usake prANa lauTa AeM; para vaha prayAsa bhI viphala rhaa| aba to andezA yahI thA ki vaha kahIM makAna meM hI prANa chor3a de / ataH hama donoM ne use lakar3I para uThA kara reDakrAsa sosAiTI ke svayaMsevakoM kI taraha bAhara galI meM pheMka diyA / aba hamArA yuddha kA unmAda ThaMDA par3a cukA thA / mauta ko apanI AMkhoM ke sAmane dekhakara hamAre mana meM baiThI karUNA kI kaccI mUrata pighalane lagI / hama loga vicAra karane lage ki Akhira una kuttoM ne isa pille ko kyoM mArA / Akhira yaha bhI to unhIM kI jAti kA hI thA / isakI zirAoM meM bhI vahI rakta baha rahA thA, jo unakI zirAoM meM bahu

Page #61
60 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI rahA thaa| nAka-nakza aura DIla-Daula se isakI aura unakI vaMza-paramparA meM bhI to koI antara nahIM laga rahA thA / phira yaha ghaTanA ghaTI to kyoM ghaTI ? bAta choTI-sI thI aura hama usapara bar3I gaharAI se vicAra kara rahe the / hamAre mitra ne eka lambI sAMsa lete hue kahA - dostoM, yaha vivAda bhI eka sImA vivAda hI thA / bAta rAjanIti se jur3a gaI thI, ataH hamane jijJAsA prakaTa kI ki Akhira isa sImA vivAda kA thor3A khulAsA kiyA jAya / hamAre mitra para bhI jaise amala kA nazA car3ha gayA ho| unhoMne eka khAsa prakAra se khAMsakara kahanA zurU kiyA - "dostoM, mere makAna kI bhaugolika sthiti isa prakAra kI hai ki isake donoM ora do galiyAM haiN| donoM hI galiyoM meM mere do daravAz2e khulate haiN| donoM para kuttoM kI do bhinna-bhinna pArTiyoM kA sAmrAjya hai / idhara kA kuttA udhara nahIM jA sakatA aura udhara kA kuttA idhara nahIM A sakatA / patA nahIM, yaha jagaha nagara pAlikA ke adhikAra meM hai, prAntIya sarakAra ke adhikAra meM hai yA rASTrIya sarakAra ke adhikAra meM hai, para kutte samajhate haiN| ki vaha unake hI adhikAra meM hai / isalie apanI-apanI hada para unakA apanA-apanA kabjA hai / vaise merA makAna donoM ora ko do bhAgoM meM bAMTatA hai, para kabhI-kabhI jaba donoM ora ke daravAz2e khule raha jAte haiM to sacamuca merA prAMgana eka yuddha kSetra bana jAtA hai / zAyada isake pIche roTI kA svArtha jur3A huA hai, para mujhe lagatA hai ki roTI se bhI adhika adhikAra kI koI adRzya DorI hai / isalie samaya-samaya para unakA paraspara saMgharSa calatA rahatA hai / dala parivartana kA to koI savAla hI nahIM hai, kyoMki koI eka-dUsare ke adhikAra kSetra meM A jAtA hai to vaha mauta ke ghATa utAra diyA jAtA hai / dUsare pakSa ke prati ghRNA ke bhAva na jAne kisa vidhi se bhara jAte haiM ki saMgharSa ke kSetra meM choTe-choTe pille bhI morce para para Akara DaTa jAte haiM / balki kaI bAra to lar3AI kI zuruAta bhI ve hI karate haiN| bhauMkane meM bhI ve sabase Age rahate haiM ataH sAmAnyatayA inake paraspara milane kA koI savAla hI paidA nahIM hotA / lagatA hai, Aja pichalA daravAz2A khulA raha gayA / sambhavataH yaha

Page #62
sImA vivAda | 61 pillA sAmane ke daravAje se aayaa| usI samaya ye kutte pichavAr3e se A gae hoNge| pille ko akelA dekhakara ve isapara jhapaTa pdd'e| isa becAre kI jarA-sI jAna thI, idhara se tIna-cAra moTe kutte the, ataH mukAbale kA to koI savAla hI nahIM raha jaataa| isa pakSa ke kutte pahuMca nahIM pAe, anyathA eka bar3A mahAbhArata mctaa| merA baccA isa pillese bar3A pyAra karatA thaa| itane meM galI meM se pille ke karAhane kI eka karuNa AvAz2a AI ! mujhe lagA jaise viyatanAma sImA-vivAda ke yuddha meM ghAyala hokara koI sainika karAha rahA hai| al

Page #63
sabhyatA ke dAvedAra arAvalI parvata kI suramya upatyakA meM dUra taka calI gaI eka ghATI-choTe-choTe kheta / cAroM ora phailI hariyAlI / eka sUkhA jharanA kinAre para khar3A Ama kA saghana vRkSa / saba kucha itanA manohArI thA ki hamArI pArTI kucha dera vahA~ rukane ke lie vivaza ho gii| hama vahA~ thor3I dera baiTe the ki pAsa hI khar3e kucha bacce sakucAye-sakRcAye se hamArI ora dekhane lage / yadyapi unakA raMga kAlA-kalUTA thaa| usa para bhI maila car3hA huA thaa| kapar3e bhI nAma-mAtra ke the| ve bhI jagaha-jagaha se phaTe hue evaM maile-kucaile, phira bhI unake ceharoM para svasthatA kI eka gaharI camaka thii| hama loga Apasa meM bAte karane lage--kitane abhAge haiM ye loga ! vijJAna ke isa yuga meM bhI Adima manuSya-sA jIvana jI rahe haiN| unakI isa dayanIya sthiti para karuNA hokara maiMne eka bacce se pUcha liyA-- kyA tumane kabhI sinemA dekhA hai ? sahAnubhUti kA seka pAkara ve jarA najadIka A gaye / maiMne phira usI apane prazna ko doharAyA-- kyA tumane kabhI sinemA dekhA hai sanimA ? sanimA kyA hotA hai ? eka bacce ne ulaTakara prazna mujha para hI lAda diyaa| maiMne kahA- parde para jo dRzya Ate haiM, vaha ! para baccA merI bAta ko nahIM samajha skaa| saca bAta to yaha hai ki mujhe bhI apane uttara se saMtoSa nahIM thaa| itane meM bacce ne hare-bhare pahAr3a kI ora saMketa kara kahA- hamArA 'sanimA' to yaha hai| subaha-zAma sUraja AtAjAtA hai, aura hama bhagavAna kI lIlA dekhate rahate haiN| hamArI bher3a-bakariyAM hI hamArA sanimA haiN| mujhe usake ajJAna para dayA to AyI, para maiM socane lagA, pahAr3iyoM,

Page #64
sabhyatA ke dAvedAra | 63 nadiyoM, jharanoM, vRkSoM tathA khetoM se bhI bar3hakara kyA koI sinemA hotA hai ? subaha-zAma jo dRzya AkAza para pratibimbata hote haiM, sacamuca unake sAmane sinemA ke acche se acche dRzya bhI phIke haiN| bAdaloM kI raMgIna chaTA kisI raMgIna pikcara se kyA kama hogI ? zaharoM meM rahane vAle logoM ko kahA~ prApta hotA hai yaha prAkRtika sinemA ! itane meM hamAre eka sAthI ne TrAMjisTara kA baTana dabAyA aura silona se gAne Ane lge| maiMne una vanavAsI lar3akoM se pUchA- kucha samajha meM AtA hai ? unhoMne sira hilA diyaa| maiMne phira pUchA- isameM kauna bola rahA hai ? unhoMne kahA- hameM kyA patA bAbU ? tuma bhI kabhI gAnA gAte ? maiMne Age puuchaa| eka lar3akI ko Age kara unhoMne kahA- yaha roja zAma ko bhagavAna kI AratI meM bhajana gAtI hai| baccI ne binA jhijhaka aura binA kisI nAja-nakhare ke gAnA zurU kara diyA---'mhAre AMgaNiye Ao ghanazyAma, daraza bina maiM tdd'phN|' galA itanA sApha thA usa lar3akI kA ki jitanA sApha galA zaharoM meM hajAroM lar3akiyoM meM bhI zAyada nahIM milatA / ho bhI kaise, jabaki ve dina bhara cAya, AIsakrIma, cATa, pakaur3e cATatI rahatI hai| aura usa bholI AkRti para bhAvoM kI jo chAyA utara rahI thI, usameM to maiM apane-Apa ko bilakula bhUla gyaa| maiM phira apanI vaijJAnika upalabdhiyoM para lajjita huA / mujhe lagA, yadyapi zaharoM meM anekoM manoraMjana ke sAdhana prApta ho rahe haiM, para phira bhI hama apanA svAbhAvika manoraMjana kho rahe haiM / dina-bhara calate-calate hamArA dala kucha thaka gayA thA / para una baccoM ke sAtha jo sahaja manoraMjana ho rahA thA, usase mana ko zAMti mila rahI thii| kucha sAthiyoM ko bhUkha bhI laga AI, ataH vicAra huA ki yahIM nAztA kara leN| hamane apane-apane jhole meM se nAztA nikAlA aura khAnA zurU kara diyaa| kucha sAthiyoM kI icchA huI ki yahA~ yadi cAya mila jAye to majA A jAye / cAya kI pattI tathA cInI hamAre pAsa thI kuAM pAsa meM thA hI, IMdhana kI kamI jaMgala meM nahIM thii| kamI thI to kevala dUdha kI / hama Apasa meM yaha bAta kara hI rahe ki itane meM eka bar3A lar3akA

Page #65
64 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI phurtI se uThA aura pAsa kI TekarI para banI apanI jhoMpar3I kI ora daudd'aa| kucha hI kSaNoM meM hama dekhate haiM ki vaha apane hAtha meM elmyuniyama kA mailA-sA bartana thAme A rahA hai / aba jhoMpar3e ke aMdara se grAmya auratoM kI kucha jor3I AMkheM bhI hamArI ora dekhane lagI thii| lar3akA hamAre pAsa AyA aura bolA- lo bAbU, dUdha ! hameM isa apratyAzita Atithya para bar3A sukhada Azcarya huaa| kahA~ to hama zaharoM ke loga, jo ghara Aye logoM se bhI bacanA cAhate haiM aura kahA~ ye grAmINa loga, jo binA hI jAne-pahacAne hamArA Atithya kara rahe haiM / hamAre antarmana meM eka dvandva chir3a gyaa| yadyapi hama jAti-pAMti ke bandhana se mukta the, phira bhI hama apanI hI kSudratA ke nIce dabe jA rahe the ! hama soca rahe the ki hameM inakA Atithya svIkAra karane kA koI adhikAra nahIM hai, para hameM cAya pInI thI ataH socA ki phira paise de deMge, abhI dUdha to lelo| lar3akoM ne IMdhana ikaTThA karane meM bhI hamArA sAtha diyaa| sAtha kyA diyA-- adhikatara lakar3iyAM unhoMne hI ikaTThI kI thI / pattharoM kA eka cUlhA bnaayaa| pAnI bhI le aaye| cAya ubalane lgii| prAkRtika suramya dRzya aura khulA vAtAvaraNa, hAtha kI banI cAya, mitroM kI TolI itanA sneha bharA Atithya ! sacamuca cAya pIne meM bar3A majA aayaa| cAya pIkara hamane apanA sAmAna jhole meM DAlA aura bartana lauTAte hue dUdha kA hisAba karane lge| lagabhaga AdhA kilo dUdha thA / hamane hisAba lagAyA ki udayapura meM ar3hAI rupayA kilo dUdha milatA hai| gAMvoM meM kucha sastA hogA, ata: eka rupayA kilo ke hisAba se ATha Ane unako dene lage / baccoM ne kahA-kyA karate haiM ? Apa to hamAre mehamAna haiN| Apase paisA kisa bAta kA ? hamane kahA-hama tumhAre kahAM ke atithi hue ? baccoM ne kahA- hamArI bastI meM Aye aura yahAM vizrAma kiyA, to apane-Apa hamAre atithi ho gaye / hamane kahA--phira bhI dUdha ke paise to tumheM lene hoNge| tuma loga koI amIra ho, jo paise nahIM lete? baccoM ke muMha para ajIba bhAva AyA / bole--bAbU ! hama garIba ho sakate haiM para dharmahIna nahIM ho sakate / kyA dUdha aura pUta bhI kabhI bece jAte haiM !

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sabhyatA ke dAvedAra / 65 hamAre muMha para thappar3a-sI lgii| aisA lagA, jaise hama sote-sote uTha par3e haiN| hama apane-Apa meM lajjita hone lge| kahAM ye anapar3ha loga aura kahAM hama zikSita loga ! inhoMne hamArA itanA niHsvArtha Atithya kiyA aura hama inako eka kapa cAya kI jhUThI manuhAra bhI na kara sake ? jhaMpakara ina baccoM ko thor3A cAkaleTa bAMTa kara Age bar3he, para hamArA mana apanI isa kSudratA ke lie barAbara pachatAtA rhaa|

Page #67
anyAya kA paisA isa varSa phasala itanI acchI huI thI ki aba bhI kheta khalihAna anAja se bhare the| zAyada sau varSoM meM aisI phasala nahIM huI thii| isalie sATha varSoM kA eka praur3ha kisAna, seTha karor3Imala jI ke ghara AyA aura unheM pukArane lgaa| kisAna aura seThajI meM kevala rAma-rAma kA sambandha thaa| ataH use apane ghara Aye dekhakara seThajI ne pUchA- kyoM bhAI kizana jI! Aja kaise AnA huA ? kizana jI ne kahA-seTha jI, Aja hamArA hisAba-kitAba sApha kara do| isa bAra bhagavAna ne hameM dila kholakara dAna diyA hai, to maiM bhI apanA pichalA dAridraya dho denA cAhatA huuN| ApakA jitanA paisA nikalatA ho, utanA le liijie| seTha jI jarA vismita hue| unheM isa bAta kA jarA bhI jJAna nahIM thA ki kizana jI meM unakI kucha udhAra bhI hai| ataH apanI smRti ko sApha karate hue jarA cintana kI mudrA meM lIna ho gae, para kizana jI ne kahAseTha jI Apa cintita kyoM hote haiM ? __seTha jI-bhAI ! mujhe yAda nahIM hai ki maiMne tumheM kabhI rupaye udhAra die haiN| kisAna-hAM, yaha Apa ThIka kahate haiM, para merA bApa jaba marA thA to usane marate-marate mujhase kahA thA ki seThajI ke kucha rupayoM kA karz2a hamArI tarapha hai, ata: jaba bhI tumhArA hAtha khulA ho, to merA bojha utAra denaa| itane varSa phasala acchI nahIM huI, ataH maiM apane bApa kA karja nahIM cukA sakA; para yaha kAMTA mujhe sadA cubhA karatA thaa| isa bAra jaba bhagavAna ne

Page #68
anyAya kA paisA | 67. dila kholakara diyA hai, to mujhe bhI bApa kI antima icchA ko pUrA denA cAhie / ataH Apake jitane rupaye hue hoM utane jI bhara kara le liijiegaa| mere pAsa 4 bhaise haiM, 8 gAya haiM 200 bher3a-bakariyAM haiM, gur3a hai, anAja hai| ApakA jitanA paisA banA ho, utanA byAja sameta le liijie| seThajI jarA vismita hue, para paise kI bAta sunakara unake muMha meM pAnI bhara aayaa| unhoMne kisAna ko to andara kamare meM baiThA diyA aura purAne bahIkhAtoM ko palaTanA zurU kiyaa| 50-60 varSoM ke jamA khAte meM na to kisAna kA nAma AtA thA aura na usake pitA kaa| kizana ne seTha jI se kahA--- seThajI ! Apane kitane varSa purAne bahI-khAte dekhe haiM ? seTha jI ne kahA-.50-60 varSa purAne bahI-khAte to dekha lie| kizana - Apa 100 varSa purAne khAte dekhie| mere dAdA rAjArAma ke nAma kA koI lena-dena hogaa| yaha to mujhe patA nahIM unhoMne kitane rupaye lie the| itanA hisAba na mere pitAjI ko AtA thA aura na mujhe| isalie Apake jitane dharma ke rupaye banate hoM Apa khulakara le liijie| hAM, hama garIba haiM, isa bAta kA z2arUra khyAla rkhnaa|| ___eka bAra to seTha jI ke mana meM jarA patritA aaii| unhoMne socA, kahA~ yaha garIba kisAna aura kahAM maiM eka bhAgyavAna seTha ! isake mana meM apane-Apa ko dhone ke lie kitanI bhAvanA hai para maiM kitanA kIcar3a meM sanA huA hU~ ! ata: unhoMne kahA---kizana jI ! sau varSa kI bAta aba jAne bhI do| Ajakala to 3 varSa bAda hI rupayoM kI bAta khatama ho jAtI hai| isI bAta ke lie hI merA jAne kitane logoM se jhagar3A cala rahA hai| tuma pahale vyakti ho, jo Aja mere ghara calakara Ae ho / bAkI Aja ghara para Akara rupae dene kA to jaise rivAja hI uTha gayA ho| maiM tumhArI isa ImAnadArI se prasanna huuN| ata: tumhAre rupae haiM bhI to A gae smjho|| kizana-seTha jI, ApakI yaha kRpA to bahuta bar3I hai. para maiM kapUta honA nahIM caahtaa| mere bApa-dAdoM kA jo karja hai vaha merA hI karja hai| na jAne ye rupae Apa hamase kisa janma ke mAMgate haiM ? Aja nahIM cukAyeMge to na jAne kisa janma meM cukAne par3eMge? isalie maiM nahIM cAhatA isa paramparA ko Age taka bar3hAyA jaay| Apa apane rupae Aja hI le

Page #69
68 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI liijie| kala na jAne kyA ho, maiM nahIM kaha sakatA / seTha jI to isa uttara se kucha nahIM bole, para unake putroM ke muMha meM lAra Tapakane lgii| unake dharma-karma kI paribhASA meM eka moTI murgI mila gaI thI / zrataH ve use jI bhara kara cUsa lenA cAhate the / sau varSoM ke bahI khAte dekhe gae, Akhira eka jagaha rAjArAma kA nAma mila gayA / usane apane bApa ke mRtyu bhoja ke lie seTha kiror3Imala jI ke pitA se 100 rupae udhAra lie the / avasara hI aisA A gayA ki ve cukAe nahIM 'jA sake / seTha ke putroM ne bar3I caturAI se byAja pratibyAja lagAyA, hajAroM rupae ho gae the| unhoMne bar3I dayA dikhAte hue kahA - kizana jI, sArA rupayA tuma nahIM cukA sakoge / hisAva kitAba ke jhagar3e meM mata par3o / hama bhI nahIM cAhate ki tumhArA ghara-bAra caupaTa ho jAya / tumhAre bAla-bacce -dAne ko taraseM / batAo, abhI tuma apane sAtha kyA lAe ho ? 1 kisAna ne batAyA - - abhI 2 gAr3I makkI, 1 gAr3I gur3a, 100 rupae nagada / seTha putroM ne kahA- ye to hameM de hI do / sAtha 2 bhaiMseM, 2 gAya aura 100 bher3a-bakariyAM aura denA / basa, tumhArA lena-dena sApha kie dete haiM / kizana jI ko itanA hisAba-kitAba kahAM AtA thA ? unhoMne isa bAta ko svIkAra kara liyA, para dUsare hI kSaNa sAmane jala rahI aMgIThI meM unhoMne eka cimaTI bhara kara rAkha uThAI / use apanI hathelI para rakhA aura bole- dekhie seTha jI ! ApakA dharma Apake pAsa hai aura merA dharma mere pAsa / maiM nahIM jAnatA ki Apane mere se jo liyA hai vaha sahI haiM yA nahIM, phira bhI Apa para avizvAsa karanA merA dharma nahIM hai / ApakA dharma Apake lie phale-phUle mujhe koI Apatti nahIM hai / para itanA Apako - batA detA hUM ki pApa kA paisA kabhI nahIM phalatA / itanA kahate-kahate kizana jI ne apanI hathelI para rakhI rAkha para phUMka maarii| phira boleApakA kharA paisA Apake pAsa rahe jisa aura prakAra yaha rAkha ur3a gaI hai, usI prakAra ApakA anyAya kA paisA ur3a jAya / seTha putroM ne isa bAta para koI dhyAna nahIM diyA ' kizana jI jo kucha lAe the, use to le liyA aura pazuoM ko lAne ke lie apane

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anyAya kA paisA / 66 naukaroM ko bhejA / ve unheM lekara A rahe the / rAste meM eka par3Ava karanA jarUrI thaa| kyoMki itane lambe rAste ko jAnavara eka dina meM pAra nahIM kara sakate the / para rAta meM na jAne kaisI havA calI ki sAre-ke-sAre jAnavara eka sAtha hI mara ge| na jAne yaha koI prAkRtika prakopa thA yA aura kucha, para logoM meM eka carcA thI ki anyAya kA paisA isI taraha naSTa ho jaataa|

Page #71
pratikriyA rameza jvelarI sTora aura merI dukAna ekadama pAsa-pAsa meM hai| varSoM se hama apanA-apanA vyavasAya karate A rahe hai| par3ausI kI bhAMti ekadUsare kA sahayoga bhI karate rahate haiN| hama donoM eka hI makAna mAlika seTha rAmakizanajI ke kirAyedAra haiN| dukAnoM ke Upara hI seThajI kA ArAmadeha vizAla makAna hai| bhAr3e kI AmadanI ke atirikta unakA byAja kA bhI acchA dhaMdhA calatA hai| yadyapi ve kirAyA aura byAja bahuta kasa kara lete haiM, para phira bhI jarUratamaMdI ko mauke-be-mauke unake pAsa AnA hI par3atA hai| Aja jaba maiM apanI dukAna para AyA to dUra se eka bar3I bhIr3a rameza jvelarI sTora aura merI dukAna ke sAmane khar3I dikhAI dii| thor3A Age Ane para vahAM mujhe kucha pulisa vAle bhI najara aaye| yaha saba dekhakara merI chAtI dhar3akane lgii| kAMpate kadamoM se maiM Age aayaa| jaldI hI mujhe patA laga gayA ki rameza jvelarI sTora para Aja rAta ko corI ho gaI hai| kAphI mAla corI calA gayA hai| loga Apasa meM bAteM kara rahe haiM - dekho, kaisA nAjuka jamAnA A gayA hai ! coroM ko to mAno kisI kA Dara hI nahIM raha gayA hai| koI pulisa kI akarmaNyatA ko kosa rahA hai, to koI janatA kI kAyaratA ko / bIca-bIca meM koI-koI vyApAriyoM kI munAphAkhorI, badanIyata tathA zoSaNa vRti para bhI vyaMga kasa rahA hai. para mujhe isa vAta se dhairya baMdhA ki merI dukAna para kucha nahIM huaa| maiM bhIr3a ko cIrakara Age AyA aura apane mitra ko sAntvanA dene lgaa| yadyapi merI sAntvanA se use dhairya nahIM baMdha rahA thaa| vaha to pulisa ko riporTa likhAne meM

Page #72
pratikriyaz / 71 vyasta thA / phira bhI par3osI ke nAte aise asavara para use dhairya baMdhAnA merA kartavya thaa| yaha saba cala hI rahA thA ki itane meM aphavAha AI ki seTha rAmakizanajI ke yuvA putra kI kisI ajJAta vyakti ne hatyA kara dI hai| mujhe lagA, ina donoM vAradAtoM meM koI anokhA mela hai, aura usI samaya acAnaka merI smRti meM do mahIne pahale kI eka ghaTanA kauMdha gii| usa dina eka haTTA-kaTTA garvIlA naujavAna dilerasiMha rameza jvelarI sTora para apanI nava-pariNItA patnI ko lekara gahane kharIdane AyA yaa| usakI patnI itanI khUbasUrata thI ki rAha calate logoM kI AMkheM usa para Thahara jAtI thii| taba phira dilerasiMha para to zAdI kA nayA khumAra thaa| usake mAtA-pitA kA dehAnta ho cukA thA, ata: vaha saba taraha se svataMtra thaa| naI aura sundara patnI kI gahanoM kI pahalI mAMga thI / dilerasiMha usameM baha gyaa| vaha seTha rAmakizanajI se hajAra rUpaye karja lekara patnI ke sAtha usake gahane kharIdane AyA thaa| maiM bhI usa dina hoza meM nahI rhaa| bArabAra merI AMkheM jvelarI sTora para ulajha jAtI thii| bhar3akIlI veSabhUSA. vAlI usa sundarI ne rUpa kI itanI sugaMdha bikhera dI thI ki maiM apane grAhakoM ke sAtha bhI ThIka taraha se vyavahAra nahIM kara pA rahA thA / para isake bAvajUda bhI usa dina merI dukAna para itane grAhaka TUTa par3e the ki mujhe unheM nipaTAne meM kAphI jhaMjhalAhaTa-sI anubhava ho rahI thii| ve bhI usa dina itane besudha najara Ate the ki unakA mere asthira vyavahAra kI ora koI bhI dhyAna nahIM thaa| sabhI logoM kI AMkheM jvelarI sTora ke vana ve TrAphika kI yAtrA kara rahI thii| ___ rameza ne bhI usa dina khUba hAr3a-phor3a kara dAma liye| jaba sArA saudA paTa gayA aura bhIr3a chaMTa gaI to usane batAyA Aja to acchI machalI phNsii| usane hI mujhe dilera siMha kA nAma patA va usake seTha rAmakizana jI se karja lene kI bAta batAI thii| isase saMyoga-hI kahanA cAhiye ki dilerasiMha kA ghara pAsa vAle usI gAMva meM thA, jisa gAMva meM merA kRSi phArma thaa| yadyapi maiM udhara kaI bAra AtA-jAtA thA, para dilera siMha ke bAre meM mujhe koI jJAna nahIM thaa| paricaya se paricaya bar3hatA hai|

Page #73
72 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI ataH pichale dinoM jaba rameza phArma para jAtA to anAyAsa dilerasiMha kI smRti tAjI ho jaatii| isa arse meM maiMne seTha rAmakizana jI ke AlasI aura duzcaritra putra ramAkAnta ko bhI rakama ugAhane ke bahAne dilerasiMha ke ghara kaI bAra Ate-jAte dekhaa| maiM jAnatA thA ki ramAkAnta kI rakama ugAhane meM koI dilacaspI nahIM thii| bApa ke bahuta kahane para bhI vaha kahIM rakama ugAhane nahIM jAtA thaa| nizciya hI usakI dilacaspI kA kAraNa to aura hI thaa| dilerasiMha ko bhI ramAkAnta kI badanIyatI kA patA cala gayA thaa| isIliye seThajI ke karja se mukta hone ke liye usane apanI patnI ke gahane vApisa becane kA nizcaya kara liyA thaa| abhI pAMca-cAra dina pahale hI vaha rameza jvelarsa sTora para gahanoM ko vApisa becane AyA thaa| usakA khyAla thA ki thor3e rupaye kATa kara rameza usake gahane vApisa le legA, para jaba rameza ne una gahanoM kI kasauTI para kasa kara unheM khoTe kahakara lene se inkAra kara diyA to dilera siMha kA khUna khaula utthaa| usane kahA-abhI do mahIne pahale hI to maiM tumhArI dukAna se ye gahane le gayA thA / para rameza ne usakI eka na sunii| usane ulaTA ulAhanA dete hue kahA--merI dukAna se gahane le gaye the, to tumheM AMkheM khulI rakhanI cAhiye thii| maiM khoTe gahanoM kA dhandhA nahIM karatA / lagatA hai, tuma mujhe badanAma karanA cAhate ho| para baccU, maiM tumhAre jhAMse meM Ane vAlA nhiiN| yadi tuma sacce hote to do mahIne meM hI gahane becane kyoM Ate ? maiMne tumhAre jaise kaI coroM ko carAyA hai| isI kSaNa merI dukAna se nIce utara jAo, anyathA ThIka nahIM rhegaa| dhyAna rahe, pulisa thAnA jyAdA dUra nahIM hai| dilerasiMha kI sahiSNutA hada se bAhara ho gii| apane para jhUThA iljAma lagA dekha usakA saMtulana bigar3a gyaa| usane bhI bahuta-sI aMTa-saMTa bAteM kaha diiN| rAha-calate aneka loga ikaTThe ho gaye / ramAkAnta bhI vahAM A gayA thaa| vaha rameza kI hAM meM hAM mila rahA thaa| vAtAvaraNa itanA vikSubdha ho gayA thA ki dilera siMha ko eka bhayaMkara-pratikriyA ne Dasa liyaa| maiM atIta kI ghaTanA ke ina bikhare Tukar3oM ko Age-pIche jor3ane /

Page #74
pratikriyA | 73 masagala thA ki itane meM thAnedAra ne mujhase hI pUchatAcha karanI zurU kara dI / maiMne kucha bhI jAnane se inkAra kara diyA, para mujhe isa bAta kA saMdeha paidA ho gayA ki kahIM pulisa vAle mujhe bhI phaMsA na DAleM / isIliye maiM vahAM se khisaka kara apane phArma para calA gyaa| bIca meM dilerasiMha ke ghara ko dekhA to vaha banda milA / maiMne pAsa-par3osa se jAnakArI kI to patA calA ki dilerasiMha to cAra pAMca dinoM se ghara hI nahIM aayaa| maiM nahIM jAnatA ki merA anumAna sahI hai yA galata, para mujhe yahI jaMcatA hai ki rameza jvelarI sTora kI corI aura ramAkAnta kI hatyA kA abhiyukta dilera siMha ke sivAya aura koI nahIM ho sktii|

Page #75
punarAvRtti pichale 20 varSoM se meM hara varSa dazahare kI chuTTiyoM meM saparivAra rAjasamanda cUmane AyA karatA hUM / mere jaise sAmAnya zikSaka ke lie yaha to asambhava hai ki kazmIra, nainItAla yA AbU jaise parvatIya sthAnoM para ghUmane jA sakU / parapar3hA-likhA hone ke nAte jIvana kA rasa lene kI lalaka mujha meM hai / ata: rAjasamaMda ko hI paryaTana-kendra mAnakara maiM hara varSa yahAM AyA karatA huuN| merA mAnasa usa samaya kucha halkApana mahasUsa karatA hai, jaba maiM apane samAnadharmA kucha logoM ko hI nahIM, apitu kucha samRddha logoM ko bhI yahAM ghUmate dekhatA huuN| jaba dUra-dUra ke loga yahAM Akara khuzI manA sakate haiM, to mere lie apane-Apako saMtuSTa nahIM kara lene kA koI kAraNa dikhAI nahIM detaa| isaliye apane-Apako taro-tAjA karane ke lie maiM hara varSa yahAM AyA karatA huuN| para Aja yahAM jo kucha dekha rahA hUM, usase mere purAne ghAva ke TAMke phira TUTa gaye haiN| eka nau-dasa varSa kA lar3akA tAlAba meM snAna karane kA Agraha kara rahA hai| usakI mAM hAtha pakar3e use roka rahI hai, aura maiM bIsa varSa ke atIta kI gaharAI meM utara gyaa| ThIka yahI dina thA, jaba maiM apanI patnI acalA ke sAtha pahale-pahala yahAM ghUmane ke liye AyA thaa| usa samaya hamAre parivAra meM hama do hI sadasya the| hama loga unmuktatA se tAlAba kI pAla para ghUma rahe the / usa samaya javAnI kA raMga thA / acalA ne pahalI bAra garbha dhAraNa kiyA thaa| maiM use adhika se adhika sukha denA cAhatA thaa| mere prema se acalA itanI tRpta thI ki vaha mujhase sampanna logoM ko dekhakara bhI mana meM hInatA

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punarAvRtti / 75 kA anubhava nahIM karatI thii| vAstava meM prema hI hamAre sAre abhAvoM ko bharatA hai / isI pravAha meM bahate hue hama bhI bar3e ullAsa aura utsAha se idhara-udhara ghUma rahe the| kabhI hama chatariyoM kI sundara tarAza ko dekha rahe the, to kabhI pAla ke sudRr3ha vAstu-zilpa ko dekha rahe the / kabhI pAnI kI laharoM ko dekha rahe the, to kabhI una para tairane vAlI machaliyoM ko| tAlAba khUva bhara gayA thaa| ThaMDI-ThaMDI havA cala rahI thii| hama loga ghUmate-ghUmate bA~dha ke dakSiNI kinAre para A gaye / vahAM para eka choTA-sA mandira thA / hama usake andara cale gaye / acAnaka acalA kA mana apane bhAvI zizu kI kalpanA meM kulAceM bharane lagA / usane pratimA kI ora dekha saMkocabhare svaroM meM kahA-yadi mujhe lar3akA huA to maiM use isI varSa isI pratimA ke caraNoM meM littaauuNgii| vAstava meM yaha eka saMkalpa nahIM, apitu manautI thI / yaha acalA kI putra-kAmanA kI abhivyakti thii| maiMne use dulArate hue kahA are ! isI varSa kyA maiM tumheM aura tumhAre beTe ko hara varSa isa pratimA ke darzana kraauuNgaa| Ao, hama bhagavAna se varadAna mAMgeM ki ve hameM putra pradAna kreN| bhAvanA ke tIvra pravAha meM bahate-bahate atyanta zraddhA aura vizvAsa ke sAtha hamane apane bhAvI putra kA nAma bhI taya kara liyA thA ! kitanA sundara thA vaha nAma devadatta / sacamuca hamArI zraddhA ke anurUpa hameM putra hI prApta huaa| usI varSa dazaharA kI chuTTiyoM meM hI hama devadatta ko lekara rAjasamaMda ke usa ajJAta nAmA deva-maMdira meM upasthita hue| usa varSa hamAre sAtha aneka sambandhI bhI the / mere bhAI-bahana, acalA ke bhAI-bahana Adi / hamArI vaha yAtrA bar3I sukhada rhii| saba logoM ne hama para jI bhara kara AzIrvAda brsaaye| sabhI hamAre pati-patnI kI jor3I para khuza the| yadyapi maiM apane abhAvoM se bekhabara nahIM thA, para jo AdamI sadA abhAvoM meM hI jItA hai vaha jIvana kA rasa nahIM le sakatA? Aja to jaise mere sAre abhAva bhI chUmaMtara ho gae the| acalA to usa dina atyanta prasanna thii| usane atyanta zraddhA bhAva se apane hAthoM se devadatta ko pratimA ke caraNoM meM littaayaa| taba se hI rAjasamaMda hamArA paryaTana kendra hI nahIM raha gayA, apitu zraddhA-kendra bhI bana gyaa| paryaTana kA raMga to avasthA ke sAtha alabattA kucha phIkA

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76 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI par3a jAtA hai, para zraddhA kA raMga kabhI phIkA nahIM par3atA / isIlie taba se hara varSa hama yahAM Ate aura vinamra bhAva se pratimA ke caraNoM meM apaneApako samarpita krte| devadatta bhI sadA hamAre sAtha rahatA / kabhI-kabhI kisI vajaha se yadi hama chuTTiyoM meM na A pAte to bAda meM Ate, para yahA~ hara varSa Ane kA hamArA saMkalpa kabhI khaMDita nahIM huaa| para pichale pAMca varSa meM mere yahAM Ane kI preraNA meM parivartana ho gayA hai| aba na to vaha paryaTana kI rahI aura na zraddhA kI, apitu mAtama manAnA mAtra raha gayI ho| usa dina bhI hamArA choTA-sA parivAra--- maiM acalA aura devadatta yahA~ ghUmane tathA deva darzana ke lie Aye the| devadatta usa samaya 15 varSa kA ho gayA thaa| hamArA usa para atizaya prema thaa| acalA ke to vaha prANoM meM aTakA rahatA thaa| vaha to use bAhara khelane ke lie bhI nahIM jAne detI thii| kabhI vaha skUla se Ane meM thor3I dera kara detA to acalA usako lene pahuMca jAtI thii| kabhI use thor3A-sA jukAma bhI ho jAtA, to acalA kI nIMda harAma ho jaatii| mujhe acalA kA yaha atizaya putra-prema kucha pAgalapana-sA lagatA, para devadatta ke prati merI mamatA bhI kama nahIM thI / maiM use eka yogya vyakti banAnA cAhatA thaa| maiM nahIM cAhatA thA ki vaha bhI merI hI taraha zikSaka banakara eka choTI-sI jagaha meM ulajha jaaye| ___maiM use bar3A AdamI banAnA cAhatA thaa| merA vicAra thA ki acalA atizaya prema meM pAlakara use kAyara aura kamajora banA rahI hai| isIlie to usa dina jaba devadatta bAMdha meM nahAne kI jida karane lagA to acalA ne usako jAne nahIM diyaa| usane kahA thA--tumheM nahAnA hai to, idhara nala para nahA lo, pAnI meM nahIM jAne duuNgii| para devadatta tAlAba meM nahAne kA Agraha kara rahA thaa| tAlAba meM aura loga bhI nahA rahe the| kucha bacce taira bhI rahe the| unheM dekhakara hI devadatta ke mana meM nahAne kA bhAva jAgA thA / yadi devadatta kisI anya cIja yA khAne-pIne kA Agraha karatA to acalA usakI bAta ko kabhI nahIM TAlatI, para pAnI ke nikaTa jAne meM usakI mamatA ko kucha khatarA-sA dikhAI de rahA thaa| ataH usane kaDAI se devadatta ko roka diyaa| vaise devadatta apanI mAM ke lAr3a ko

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punarAvRtti / 77 samajhanA thA, para usa lAr3a ne use jiddI bhI banA diyA thaa| apanI mA~ ko harAne kA usake pAsa eka mAtra vahI hathiyAra thA-ronA, para Aja to acalA isa hathiyAra se bhI Tasa se masa nahIM hii| mujhase yaha saba dekhA nahIM gyaa| eka ora to devadatta ke mana meM gAMTha baMdhatI najara A rahI thI tathA dUsarI ora acalA ke prema meM kucha dabbUpana kI gaMdha A rahI thii| ata: maiMne bIca meM hastakSepa karate hue kahA--tU devadatta ko jAne kyaM nahIM detI ? bacce ko pAnI meM nahAne kA cAva paidA ho gayA hai, to kinAre para baiThakara nahA legA, tU ise kyoM rokatI hai ? / . acalA ne kahA -cAva bahuta hote haiM, maiM kaba unheM rokatI huuN| maiM isake kisI cAva ko adhUrA nahIM rahane denA cAhatI, para pAnI meM maiM nahIM jAne detii| maiMne acalA kA majAka ur3Ate hue kahA - isI prakAra tU ise dabbU banAye rkhegii| ___ acalA -- yaha dabbUpana kI bAta nahIM hai / anubhavI AdamiyoM ne hI to kahA hai rAjA jogI agana jala, yAkI ulTI rIta, dUrA rahiyo parasarAma tar3ake tor3e praut| maiM-itane loga pAnI meM nahAte haiM, ve kyA sAre DUba jAte haiM ? acalA-DUba nahIM jAte haiM, to pichalI bAra vaha devagar3ha vAlA lar3akA kyoM DUba gayA thA ? maiM--yoM kisI kI mauta A jAtI hai to usako koI nahIM roka sktaa| itanI AzaMkAoM se AdamI kA kAma nahIM cala sktaa| merI bAta acalA ke gale to nahIM utarI para vaha usakA jabAva nahIM de pAyI / devadata mere hastakSepa se saMtuSTa thaa| vaha mana hI mana haMsa rahA thaa| ata: maiMne bhI khuza hokara kahA-cala, beTA ! hama donoM hI Aja tAlAba meM snAna karane jAte haiM / aura acalA ke virodha ke bAvajUda bhI hama tAlAba cala par3e / acalA thor3I kaTa kara raha gaI, para merI khuzI ko apanI khuzI mAna lene kI usakI Adata thii| ataH hameM sAvadhAna karate hue bolIjarA sAvadhAna rhnaa| ___

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78 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI maiMne madhura vyaMga karate hue kahA - aba sAvadhAnI ke lie tuma bhI hamAre sAtha A jAo to acchA rhegaa| _acalA ne saMkucAte hue kahA-itane AdamiyoM ke bIca meM acchI lagUMgI? aura phira hama donoM kapar3e utAra kara tAlAba meM nahAne lage / maiM atyaMta satarka dhA / devadatta ko maiM apane pAsa hI rakhe hue thaa| hama loga dhIre-dhIre tAlAba kI caukiyAM utara kara thor3e pAnI meM nahAne lge| tAruNya kI mastI meM devadatta mere se thor3A Age utara gyaa| maiM usako manA karatA, itane meM eka karuNa cItkAra ke sAtha devadatta pAnI maiM gAyaba ho gyaa| maiM thor3A usake pIche daur3A, para maiM bhI tairanA nahIM jAnatA thA / ata: Age. nahIM jA skaa| maiM vahIM khar3A 'bacAo, bacAo' kI AvAz2a lagAne lgaa| thor3I dUra para kucha loga nahA rahe the| unameM se eka-do AdamI pAnI meM kUde. para devadatta kA koI patA nahIM laga skaa| kAphI loga mere cAroM ora ekatra ho gye| mujhe to kATo to khUna na rahA / mujhe isa bAta kA to dukha thA hI ki merI vajaha se Aja devadatta acAnaka isa loka se bidA ho gayA, para mujhe acalA kI yAda kara atyaMta lajjA Ane lgii| meM socane lagAaba maiM acalA ko kaise apanA muMha dikhAU~gA? kucha dera taka to mujhe sUjha hI nahIM par3A ki kyA karanA caahie| loga mujhe sAntvanA de rahe the, para merA to jaise kalejA phaTa rahA thA / eka kSaNa to mujhe vicAra AyA ki aba maiM bhI pAnI meM kUda kara jala-samAdhi le luu| para kucha to logoM ne mujhe ghera rakhA thA, kucha jIbana kA avyakta moha thA, jisase AtmahatyA nahIM kara skaa| aura itane meM mUchita bhI ho gyaa| mujhe phira kucha bhI patA nahIM rahA ki kyA huA / jaba mujhe hoza AyA to maiMne dekhA ki acalA mujhe apanI goda meM liTA kara mujha para havA kara rahI hai| usakI AMkhoM meM A~suoM kI dhArA baha rahI hai |maiN to kucha bola bhInahIM skaa| acalA ne rote-rote kahA-aba jo huA so huA, usako bhUlo / calo apane ghara cleN| ___ maiM aba kara hI kyA sakatA thA ? maiMne kahA-acalA! mujhe kSamA kro| maiM tumhAre putra kA hatyArA hU~ !

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punarAvRtti / 76 dUsare varSa maiM dazahare kI chuTTI meM rAjasamaMda nahIM AnA cAhatA thA / para acalA ne mujhase Agraha kiyA / maiMne kahAmeM koI rasa nahIM hai / - aba merA rAjasamaMda jAne acalA ne kahA - bhale hI aba tumhArI vahAM jAne meM koI abhiruci nahIM hai, para kama se kama devadatta kI yAda karane to calo / isa prakAra niraMtara yaha krama bIsa varSa se cAlU hai / maiM pichale pA~ca varSoM se yahA~ AtA to hU~, para AnaMda manAne nahIM / yahA~ Akara jI bhara kara rotA hU~ / mujhe lagatA hai, isameM merA kalejA thor3A halakA hotA hai, para Aja jaba eka ajJAta strI ko apane bacce kA hAtha pakar3a kara tAlAba meM snAna karane se rokate hue dekhakara phira merI A~khoM ke Age devadatta kI chavi nAcane lagI hai / Aja maiM yaha nahIM kaha sakA ki - -itane loga pAnI meM nahAne jAte haiM, ve kyA sAre DUba jAte haiM ? balki mere hoThoM meM acalA kA kahA huA yaha dohA nAca rahA thA rAjA jogI agana jala, yAkI ulTI rIta, dUrA rahiyo parasarAma, tar3ake tor3e prIta | Men

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parivartana usa bacce ko zarAba kI dukAna para dekhakara mujhe apanA bacapana yAda A gyaa| maiM bhI eka dina itanI hI umra meM apane bApa ke sAtha pahalI bAra aisI hI dukAna para pAyA thaa| merA bApa zarAbI thaa| patA nahIM, use yaha Adata kaba lagI thI, para jaba se maiMne hoza saMbhAlA, vaha khUba chakakara pItA thaa| dArUkhAne meM to pItA hI thA, para ghara para bhI use paraheja nahIM thaa| merI mA~ pahale-pahale thor3A virodha karatI thI, para jisa dina virodha karatI usa dina usa para mAra pdd'tii| isalie dhIre dhIre mA~ ne to virodha karanA hI chor3a diyaa| phira bhI kabhI merA bApa jaba jyAdA pI letA thA, to binA kisI vajaha hI gAliyA~ bakane lagatA / sAdhAraNataH merI mA~ nahIM bolatI, para jaba kabhI vaha muMha khola letI to usakI piTAI ho jAyA karatI thii| ghara meM bhayaMkara garIbI thii| bApa kar3I mehanata karatA thaa| ata: apanI thakAna utArane ke lie use pInA jarUrI thA / mA~ bhI mehanata karatI thI para vaha pItI nahIM thii| vaha yathAsaMbhava pitAjI ko apanI apekSA acchA khAnA detI thii| kabhI-kabhI to jaba zarAba nahIM milatI, to pitAjI itane narvasa ho jAte the ki ne niDhAla hokara ghara Akara par3a jAte / mA~ ko una para dayA AtI aura vaha apane bacAye hue paisoM se zarAba lAkara pilAyA karatI thii| balki kabhI kabhI to zarAba ke lie pitAjI mA~ ko itanA pITate the ki becArI adhamarI ho jAtI / isalie mAra kI apekSA use yahI acchA lagatA thA ki pahale hI zarAba kI vyavasthA kara dI jAya, para mai dekhatA thA ki mAra khAne para bhI usakI A~khoM meM dayA kI chAyA jyAdA dikhAI detI thii| pativrata dharma kI bhAvanA usameM kUTa kUTa kara bharI huI thii| al

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parivartana / 81 dhIre-dhIre pitAjI nirbala hote gaye / merI avasthA bahuta choTI thI, phira bhI mujhe majadUrI para lagAyA gyaa| pitAjI ko mere para dayA to AtI, para kyA kiyA jAya ! ghara kA kharcA calAne ke lie yaha Avazyaka thA ki maiM bhI kaccI umra meM hI majadUrI ke jue meM jota diyA jaauuN| jaba mujhe pahale mahIne kI tanakhvAha milI to pitAjI mujhe bhI apane sAtha aDDe para le gaye / zAyada inhoMne socA hogA ki jaba unako thakAna AtI hai to mujhe bhI kaise nahIM AtI hoMgI ? isalie ve mujhe apane sAtha le gaye aura mujhe bhI thor3I pilaaii| yadyapi pahale dina mujhe usakA svAda acchA nahIM lagA, para mere mana meM kautU-hala thA ki pitAjI roja pIte haiN| dekhanA cAhie, isameM kyA khAsa bAta hai ? mujhe bhI thor3I dArU pIkara tAjagI mahasUsa huii| dhIre-dhIre yaha krama bar3hane lagA / bahudhA pitAjI mujhe bhI apane sAtha dArU pilaate| phira to aisI Adata ho gaI ki pitAjI nahIM pilAte to mujhe svayaM usakI vyavasthA karanI pdd'tii| paisA mere hAtha meM nahIM AtA thA, ataH mujhe apane hamaumra dosta DhU~r3hane par3ate / vaise to unameM kucha to svayaM bhI dArU ke AdI the, para kucha dostoM ko pilAnA sikhAne kA zreya mujhe bhI milA hai| paise kI taMgI hotI, to hama loga corI karate / jaba bhI corI kA paisA milatA to hama logoM kI pArTI apane-Apa jama jAtI thii| aksara hama grapa meM corI karate the aura sAtha meM hI zarAba pIte the / hama logoM meM aisI dostIho gaI thI ki hama eka dUsare kI pUrI madada karate the| yadyapi hamAre meM kabhI-kabhI Apasa meM jhagar3e bhI hote the, para phira bhI hamArI dostI itanI gaharI thI ki eka dUsare kA sahayoga karane meM hama AgA-pIchA nahIM karate the| jaba kabhI vyaktigata corI kA avasara mila jAtA to hama AnaMda se eka dUsare ko sigareTa pilAte, cAya pilAte, sinemA dikhAte, kabhI-kabhI hoTala meM bhI gulacharre ur3Ate the / sinemA se hameM aneka prakAra kI zikSAyeM miliiN| kaI gaMde gAne hameM yAda ho gye| gaMde phoTo bhI hameM kahIM na kahIM mila jAte the| kisI bhI lar3akI ko dekhakara kyA phikare kasanA, yaha hameM jJAta ho cukA thaa| merA svAsthya bahuta kharAba rahane lagA thaa| kizora avasthA meM bhI

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82 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI mujhe khA~sI Ane lagI thii| yadyapi mastI ke kAraNa merA zarIra to moTA hotA jA rahA thA, para usakI kA~ti naSTa ho cukI thii| mere hoMTha kAle par3a cuke the| saphAI kA to khaira koI savAla hI nahIM thaa| maiM bahuta gaMdA rahatA thaa| merI mA~ ko merI AdatoM kA patA cala gayA thA, para vaha mujhe kucha kaha nahIM sakatA thii| kabhI ekAdha bAra kahA bhI to maiMne pitAjI kI AdatoM kA jikra kara use baMda kara diyaa| bApa jaba galata rAste para calatA hai to beTe ko kauna roka sakatA hai ? mA~ bicArI kar3avI ghUTa pIkara raha jaatii| kabhI-kabhI vaha mujhe satsaMga meM le jAne kI koziza karatI, para mere lie apane dostoM kI saMgata sarvopari thii| ghara meM to maiM basa khAne-pIne aura sone ke lie hI AtA thaa| bAkI kA merA samaya to bAhara hI bItatA thaa| mujhe vezyAoM ke tathA jue ke aDDe acchI taraha se mAlUma the| pitAjI ko mujhe kucha kahane kA savAla hI nahIM thaa| ve jaba svayaM sarvaguNa-saMpanna the, to mujhe kucha sIkha dene kA naitika adhikAra bhI nahIM thaa| balki pitAjI isa bAta ko acchA samajhate the ki maiM jiMdagI kI mauja laTa rahA huuN| phira kabhI.kabhI jaba mujhe corI ke paise milate to maiM pitAjI kI madada bhI kiyA karatA thaa| ata: ve to ulaTe mere ahasAnamaMda the| ___acAnaka eka dina pitAjI kA dehAMta ho gyaa| vaise unakA AdamI to pahale hI mara cukA thA, para phira bhI ve apanI jiMdA lAza Dhote rahate the / zarAba jyAdA pIne se unakI AMkheM kharAba ho gaI thiiN| botala ne eka dina unako hamase alaga kara diyA / ___alabattA usa dina mujhe eka dhakkA lagA thaa| hAlAMki pitAjI ke kriyA-karma ke avasara para bhI mujhe apane saMbaMdhiyoM tathA pitAjI ke mitroM ke lie botala kA prabaMdha karanA par3A thA, para aMtima dina saba loga apaneghara cale gaye aura ghara meM maiM aura merI mA~ hama do hI the / mA~ ne mujhe gIlI A~khoM se kahA thA--dekha beTA ! tere pitAjI kI gaMdI AdatoM ke kAraNa hI Aja hameM yaha dina dekhanA par3A hai| aba tere lie sa~bhalane kA avasara hai / tU yadi isI rAste se jAnA cAhatA hai, to mere ghara se nikala jA aura yadi sahI rAste para calanA hai to apanI gaMdI AdatoM ko chor3a de| eka to pitA jI kI mRtyu, dUsare mA~ ke A~sU aura tIsarI vivazatA /

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parivartana | 83 maiMne mA~ ke paira chue aura usa dina ke bAda apane jIvana kA parivartana karane kI kasama khAI / mA~ ne apanI bAta ko pakkA karate hue kahA, "dekha : tU kasama to khA rahA hai, para kisI dina maiMne tumheM gaMdI AdatoM meM vyasta dekha liyA to khaira nahIM hogI / aba se tU mere sAtha hI kAma para AyegA / tujhe apane dostoM kA saMga chor3anA pdd'egaa| mA~ kA saba kathana itane mauke kA tathA bhAvapravaNa thA ki maiMne sacamuca hI apane jIvana kI rAha badala dii| yadyapi kabhI-kabhI mujhe abhyAsavaza apanI mitramaMDalI meM jAne kI lalaka uThatI, para mA~ ke anuzAsana ke kAraNa maiM udhara nahIM jA sakA / pahale to mujhe mere dosta lalacAte rhe| avasara Ane para mujha para dabAva bhI DAlate rahe / Dhulamula kahakara cir3hAte bhI eka bAra ve ghara bhI Aye, para merI mA~ ne unheM aisI phaTakAra batAI ki ve mere ghara kA rAstA hI bhUla gye| mere Upara mA~ kA raMga itanA gaharA car3ha cukA thA ki usa para dostoM kA raMga hAvI nahIM ho skaa| mA~ ne bhI eka-Adha bAra merI parIkSA ke lie kucha jAla phailAye---- paise khule rakhe, par3osI kI chokarI ko bhI rakhakara bAhara calI gaI, zarAba kI botala bhI rakhI, para maiM saMbhala cukA thaa| ata: kisI bhI pralobhana se phisalA nhiiN| ___hamArI AmadanI bahuta thor3I thii| pitAjI ke kriyAkarma meM kucha karjA bhI ho gayA thaa| yadyapi khAnA aba pahale kI apekSA acchA milatA tathA merA svAsthya bhI sudhara gayA thA, para phira bhI maiM koI par3hA-likhA to thA nahIM-na koI dhaMdhA karanA jAnatA thA / aMtata: bahuta salAha-mazavirA ke bAda merI mA~ ne avaidha dArU banAne kA dhaMdhA zurU kara diyaa| dhIre-dhIre hamArI AmadanI bar3hane lgii| maiM bhI isa dhaMdhe meM pravINa ho gayA, para apanI mAM ke kaThora niyaMtraNa meM maiM dArU kI eka bUda bhI apane gale ke nIce nahIM utAra sakA / aba maiM vaise thor3A-thor3A apanI paristhati tathA saMsAra ko bhI samajhane lagA thA / paise ke mUlya tathA usake mahatva kI bhI mujhe kucha pahacAna ho cukI thii| apane sAthiyoM kI durdazA se bhI mujhe kucha sabaka milaa| kula milAkara zarAba kI gaMgA ke kinAre basakara bhI maiMne usameM DubakI nahIM lgaaii| dhIre-dhIre hamAre pAsa kucha paisA ikkaThA ho gyaa| aba to bAkAyadA maiMne

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84 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI apanI dArU kI dukAna khola dI hai| maiM niyamita rUpa se isa dukAna meM dArU beca rahA huuN| hara roja grAhaka Ate haiN| bacce, bUr3he, naujavAna / strIpuruSa / para maiM apane dhaMdhe meM itanA raca-paca gayA hU~ ki merA unase kevala paise se vAstA hai| Aja acAnaka isa bacce ko dekha kara mujhe apanA itihAsa yAda A gyaa| maiM acaMbhe meM par3a gayA huuN| mujhe lagatA hai jaise maiM hI apanI dukAna meM khar3A huuN| ____ maiM apane lobha kA saMvAraNa karUM yA eka itihAsa kI punarAvRtti kruuN| maiM soca rahA haiM yadi vaha ThekedAra mujhe zarAba nahIM pilAtA, to zAyada maiM baca jAtA, para nahIM, vaha to zarAba nahIM pilAtA to merA bApa mujhe dUsarI dukAna para le jAtA / maiM bhI ise nahIM pilAU~gA, to yaha bhI dUsarI jagaha jAkara piegaa| sacamuca duniyAM meM cAro aura kIcar3a hI kIcar3a bharA hai| yadi koI isase bacAne vAlA hai, to vaha mA~ hI hai| vahIM manuSya ko jaraka se nikAlakara svarga pahuMcA sakatI hai|

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kAnUna kI mauta subaha hI subaha, jaba ki pUrva ora pazcima kA bheda spaSTa ho gayA thA, pUrva meM thor3A-thor3A ujAlA dikhAI de rahA thA tathA pazcima dizA kAlI syAha paDI huI thI, cAra mitra - azoka biyANI, pAMDuraMga kulakarNI, harIza khannA evaM praphulla cakravartI - relave lAIna ko krAsa kara Age ghUmane ko jA rahe the / itane meM unheM rela kI paTarI kI ora se eka AdamI mAlagAr3I se kucha mAla curAkara bhAgatA huA dikhAI diyaa| mitroM meM Apasa meM carcA cala par3I / biyANI baulA - dekho rela vibhAga kitanA bhraSTa ho gayA hai / vaha AdamI relave kI corI kara bhAga rahA hai| sAmane pulisa vAlAkhar3A hai, para ise roka nahIM rahA / kulakarNI ne kahA- eka relave kyA, Aja to sArA sarakArI taMtra hI bhraSTa ho gayA hai / aisA lagatA hai, jaise zAsana nAma kI koI cIja hI nahIM raha gaI hai / biyANI - loga vyApAriyoM ko badanAma karate haiM, para Ajakala sarakArI taMtra itanA niraMkuza aura bhraSTa ho gayA hai ki kucha mata pUcho ! karmacAriyoM vyApArI agara kucha gar3abar3a karatA bhI hai, to sarakAra ke aphasaro aura kI sAMTha gAMTha se hI kara pAtA hai / yadi sarakArI taMtra svastha ho to majAla hai ki koI vyApArI beImAnI kara pAye ? khannA- vAstava meM sarakAra ko kar3AI se kAma lenA caahie| vaha jyoM jyoMDhIla detI hai, tyoM tyoM badamAzoM ke hausale bar3hate jA rahe haiN| maiM to socatA hU~, isa saMbaMdha meM kar3e se kar3A kAnUna bhI banAnA par3e, to sarakAra ko hica -

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86 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI kanA nahIM cAhie | para kiyA kyA jAe, sarakAra ke loga khuda hI beImAnI karate haiM to kaheM kise ? biyANI - bilakula ThIka bAta hai / maiM isa bAta kA samarthana karatA hU~ / yadi sarakAra majabUta ho to majAla hai ki koI yoM relave ke mAla kI corI kara sake ? itane meM DyUTI para khar3A bandUkadhArI pulisa bola par3A - seThajI ! Apa loga jitanI bar3I corI karate hai, usake sAmane to yaha kucha bhI nahIM hai / becArA garIba AdamI peTa bharane ke lie kucha iMtajAma kara rahA hai, to bhI apako julAba laga jAtI hai / ina choTI-choTI bAtoM se dAla meM hIMga bhI nahIM pdd'tii| vAstava meM to sarakAra ko bar3I machaliyoM ko phAMsane kI vyavasthA karanI caahie| ve hI sAre tAlAba ko gaMdA karatI haiM / yadi svaccha tarIke se sArA kAma cale, hara AdamI ko khAne ko roTI mile to kauna aisA zaitAna hogA jo beImAnI kara apane lie naraka kA rAstA sApha kare ? unheM to apanI tijorI bharane se matalaba hai / usI se kAlAbAjArI hotI hai, usIse milAvaTa hotI hai / usIse garIba pisatA hai jInA usa becAre kI vivazatA hai| mauta nahIM AtI hai taba taka use apane bAlabaccoM ke peTa meM roTI ke do kaura DAlane par3ate hai, para kyA kiyA jAya ? vyApArI loga unakI vivazatA ko kahA~ samajha pAte hai ? yoM hI becArA garIba adhamarA to hai hI, para vyApArI loga use adhamarA bhI nahIM dekhanA cAhate / unakA basa cale to zAyada ve garIboM ko kaccA hI cabA jAyeM / faarit ekadama bigar3a kara bolA- vAha ! tuma yahAM kyoM khar3e ho ? khuleAma corI kA samarthana karate ho ? vyApArI dhaMdhA karatA hai, vaha corI nahIM karatA hai / lagatA hai, tumhArI bhI isa khela meM koI pArTanarazipa hai / pulisa -- merI koI pArTanarazIpa hai yA nahI, isa bAta ko rahane deM / Apa jaise loga hI isa corI ko protsAhana de rahe haiM / ve mAla saste meM kharIdate haiM aura maMhage meM becate haiM / usI zaha para yaha corI kA dhaMdhA calatA hai / ve yadi dhaMdhA chor3a deM, to garIba kA yaha dhaMdhA apane Apa hI chUTa jaaegaa| ata: pahale vyApArI loga beImAnI karanA chor3eM, phira ve garIboM ko upadeza deM, sarakAra ko koseN| ve apane dhandhe meM to koI kaTautI

Page #88
kAnUna kI mauta | 87 karanA nahIM cAhate aura dUsare logoM para iljAma lagAte haiM yaha galata bAta hai| biyANI---tumane zarAba to nahIM pI, rakhI hai ? jAnate ho, tuma jisa taraha se bolate ho usase tumheM thAne kI rAha dikhAI jA sakatI hai| pulisa-thAne kI rAha to Apa kyA dikhAeMge, hama Apako dikhaaeNge| abhI garIba varga itanA saMgaThita nahIM hai| pUMjIpatiyoM ne hI inameM phUTa DAla rakhI hai / jisa dina majadUra eka ho gae to samajha lIjie ki Apako thAne meM jAne kI bhI jarUrata nahIM pdd'egii| ve apane Apa Apase salaTa leNge| kulakarNI - nahIM yAra ! Ajakala ina beImAna logoM ke bar3e sIMga A gae haiN| dekho to sahI, yaha do Take kA AdamI kisa taraha se bAta kara rahA hai| aisA lagatA hai jaise koI mArksa kA hI avatAra hai / para bhAI ! yoM bAteM baghArane se nahIM hogA / yadi deza kA utthAna karanA hai, to pahale apane-Apako sudhAro / garIba ko cAhe kitanA hI paisA kyoM na mila jAe, para kyA vaha apanI gaMdI AdatoM ko sudhAratA hai ? maiMne to dekhA hai, jaba bhI unake hAtha meM paisA AtA hai to ve vyasanagrasta ho jAte haiM aura utpAta macAte haiN| kevala pUjIpatiyoM ko gAlI dene se deza kA sudhAra nahIM ho sakatA / pahale apanI jabAna sNbhaalo| jarA soco ki tuma kyA bola rahe ho? pulisa-- maiM to soca-samajhakara hI bola rahA huuN| vAstava meM Apa merI jagaha hote to patA lagatA ki AdamI ko kyA bolanA caahie| Apane kabhI garIbI ke darzana nahIM kie haiN| Apa bar3e-bar3e mahaloM meM rahate haiN| Apake Aphisa bhI eyarakaMDIzaMDa haiN| kAra hara kSaNa Apake sAmane khar3I rahatI hai para yadi Apa garIba kI dazA dekha lete, usakI TUTI bikharI sIlanabharI jhoMpar3I ko dekha lete, usake bImAra bacce ko dekha lete, usakI pisatI haI aurata ko dekha lete to zAyada Apako itanA gussA nahIM aataa| Apane abhI taka amIrI ke hI sapane dekhe haiM, garIbI kI vAstavikatA kA Apako patA nahIM hai| biyANI -hada ho gii| jaba bAr3a kI kakar3I ko khAne lage to kyA kiyA jAe ? maiM to kahatA hU~, kevala corI karane vAloM ko hI nahIM apitu

Page #89
88 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI unako zaha dene vAloM ko bhI golI se ur3A denA caahie| esa lAgA ka kAraNa hI sarakAra ko karor3oM kA nukasAna uThAnA par3ayA hai| relave karmacAriyoM ko sarakAra ne kitanI suvidhAe~ dI haiM, to bhI ye loga nahIM rukate Ae dina kahIM na kahI har3atAla taiyAra rahatI hai / sarakAra bhI Aja inake vaza meM hai / use inake sAmane nAka ragar3anI par3atI hai| inakI mA~geM svIkAra ho jAtI haiM / phira bhI ye loga kAma karake kahA~ dete haiM / Aye dina durghaTanAeM hotI rahatI haiN| sarakAra ko inake lie kAnUna banAne cAhie / cakravartI - ( jo itanI dera cupa thA ) para bhAI sAhaba ! ye saba prazna bar3e Ter3he haiN| ina para sahAnubhUti se vicAra karanA par3egA / kevala kAnUna se kAma nahIM clegaa| ina sArI samasyAoM para mAnavIya dRSTi se vicAra karanA par3egA / biyANI -- miyA~ ! Apa jaise sahAnubhUti vAle logoM ne hI deza kA ber3A garka kara rakhA hai / sarakAra calatI kAnUna - kAyade se calatI hai / binA kAyade ke ghara kI gAr3I bhI nahIM calatI / cakravartI - yahI bAta to maiM kaha rahA hU~ / jisa AdamI ne thor3A sA bhI samAjazAstra kA adhyayana kiyA hai, vaha acchI taraha se jAnatA hai ki kevala kAnUna se deza nahIM calatA / yadyapi mujhe dharma-karma kI vizeSa jAnakArI nahIM hai aura na hI maiM ise mAnatA hU~ / para itanA avazya mAnatA hU~ ki jaba taka janatA kA hRdaya parivartana nahIM hogA, taba taka kAnUna nirarthaka / hai / ve kevala kAgajoM meM likhe raha jAyeMge / kAnUna kI dRSTi se dekhA jAya to Aja kAnUna kama thor3e hI haiM ? dina pratidina unakI saMkhyA bar3hatI hI jA rahI hai / para jaba taka janatA ko kAnUna meM vizvAsa nahIM hogA taba taka eka nahIM hajAra kAnUna banAno kisI kA pAlana nahIM hogA / kulakarNI - to janAba yaha samajhate haiM ki Aja jo sarakAra cala rahI hai, vaha kAnUna se nahIM cala rahI hai ? cakravatI - maiM kAnUna kI avahelanA kahA~ karatA hU~ ? maiM to manAtA hU~ ki sabase acchA kAnUna vaha hai jo sabako nyAya de / samAja ke kisI eka varga ko kosane se kAma nahIM clegaa| AvazyakatA isa bAta kI hai ki Aja jo sarakAra cala rahI hai vaha sAre samAja kI dRSTi se kAnUna

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kAnUna kI mauta / 86 kI vyAkhyA kareM ? biyANI - aisA lagatA hai, jaise Apa para bhI Ajakala kamyunijma kA nazA car3hane lagA hai, yA phira lagatA hai, Apane koI satsaMgati jvAina kara lI hai, jo itanA acchA lekcara jhAr3a sakate ho| maiM aura kucha nahIM jAnatA / maiM to itanA hI jAnatA hU~ ki yadi deza kI bAgaDora mere hAtha A jAya to ina coroM, aura beImAnoM ko sIdhA kara dU~ / eka-eka badamAza ko rAste para lagA dUM / 1 cakravartI - bhAI sAhaba ! acchA hai, Apa deza ko sudhAra deM / maiM Apako isa zubha kAma ke lie zakuna denA cAhatA hU~, para yadi Apane kevala kAnUna ko pakar3a kara zAnti kI maMjila pAnI cAhI to pahuMcanA muzkila hai / Apa logoM ko kyA sIdhA kara deMge, kahIM loga hI Apako sIdhA na kara deM / Aja kI saira inhIM bAtoM meM khatma ho gayI / yadyapi Apasa meM thor3A hAsya-vinoda bhI calatA thA, para vyaMgya itane tIkhe ho gae the ki saira kA majA jAtA rahA / phira bhI apane-Apa ko abhivyakta kara sabhI thor3A halkApana avazya mahasUsa kara rahe the| sabhI apane coTa khAye tarkoM kI mAliza kara rahe the / roja kI yaha saira hamezA calatI rhii| relave krAsiMga para Akara anAyAsa hI carcA samAja vyavasthA aura rAjanIti se jur3a jAtI / vahA~ DyUTI dene vAle pulisa ko bhI isameM thor3A-thor3A rasa AtA / mana hI mana vaha biyANI se baDA nArAja thA, kyoMki garIboM para sabase tIkhA prahAra usakA hI hotA thA / pandraha-bIsa dinoM bAda eka dina mausama kucha ThIka nahIM thA / thor3I bUMdAbAMdI bhI ho rahI thI / aura koI ghUmane nahIM AyA, kevala biyANI AyA thA / use ghUmane kI aisI Adata par3a gayI thI ki saira ke binA usakA sArA dina sUnA-sUnA-sA bItatA thA ? ataH makkhana jIna kI sapheda hApha paiMTa aura usI taraha kA sapheda baniyAna pahana, hAtha meM eka choTA-sA DaMDA le vaha ghUmane nikala gayA / sArA vAtAvaraNa zAnta thA / cAroM ora koI AdamI dikhAI nahIM diyA, para jyoMhI usane relave

Page #91
60 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI krAsiMga para paira rakhA ki dAhinI ora se relave pulisa kI sanasanAtI huI golI AI aura usake kaleje ko bIMdha gaI / viyANI vahIM gira pdd'aa| girate hI usake prANa paMkherU ur3a gye| thor3I dera meM yaha bAta sAre zahara phaila gaI / biyANI ke saMbaMdhiyoM ne Akara dekhA to daMga raha gaye / unhoMne pulisa thAne meM riporTa likhavAI / tatkAla pulisa AI, para vaha yaha dekha kara daMga raha gayI ki biyANI ke Asa-pAsa relave kA kucha kImatI sAmAna isa taraha bikharA par3A huA thA, jaise vaha use curA kara bhAga rahA thA / usake Age pulisa kucha nahIM kara sakI / parivAra vAle tarka dete rahe ki yaha sArA SaDayaMtra hai / unhoMne relave pulisa para kesa bhI kiyaa| accheacche vakIla bhI lagavAye | biyANI ke mitroM meM bhI yaha joza thA ki ve isa nirmama hatyAre ko avazya daMDita karavAyeMge, para praphulla cakravartI ne pichale ghaTanA cakra se anumAna kara liyA ki kAnUna ke eka andha samarthaka kI mauta ho gaI aura aba kAnUna kI bhI mauta hone vAlI hai / meM

Page #92
bAsI Tukar3oM kA puNya maiM binA kisI prayojana ke khir3akI ke pAsa khar3A thaa| aneka dRzya merI AMkhoM ke sAmane A rahe the| pAsa ke nIma para kauA karkaza svara meM kAMva-kAMva kara rahA thaa| kIcar3a meM baiThA sUara-parivAra Ananda magna hokara kilola kara rahA thaa| kahIM choTe-bar3e kutte galI ke bIca aAMkheM mUMde Alasya se UMgha rahe the| kucha panihArineM pAnI lekara lauTa rahI thiiN| dUra maMdira meM ghaNTA baja rahA thaa| avacetana mana kI hAMDI meM na jAne aura bhI kyA paka rahA thA ki acAnaka merA cetana mana par3osa ke makAna ke daravAje kI ora khica gyaa| eka sAtha aneka kutte usI ora daur3a rahe the / makAna-mAlakina hAtha meM bAsI roTiyAM liye 'tU-tU' kara kuttoM ko bulA rahI thii| zAyada yaha bAta mere dhyAna meM nahI AtI, kyoMki vaha daravAjA mere nIce kI ora thA, para jyoMhI kutte usa nimaMtraNa ko sunakara dAvata khAne daur3e to maiM nIce kI ora jhuka gyaa| aba maiM spaSTa dekha rahA thA ki makAna-mAlakina bar3e saMtoSa bhAva se kuttoM ko vaha bAsI dAna dene kI taiyArI kara rahI thii| maiM socane lagA--vividhatA bhare isa vAtAvaraNa meM prANI apane Avazyaka saMketa ko kitanI tatparatA se grahaNa karatA hai aura kitanA sastA hai yaha puNya ! kucha roTI ke Tukar3e baca gaye, unheM hI lekara mAlakina svarga kI rAha meM bikherane lagI / yadi itane se Tukar3oM se svarga mila jAya to use kho denA durbhAgya hI hogaa| maiM isa darzana aura gaNita meM ulajha rahA thA, para kutte isa anukampA ke liye avazya hI hRdaya se AzIrvAda de rahe the| ve apanI pUMcha hilA-hilA kara lalacAI dRSTi se lambI jIbha

Page #93
62 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI vAhara nikAla kara apanI pratikriyA vyakta kara rahe the| cAroM ora se kAphI kutte ikkaThe ho gae the| unameM se kucha bar3e the to kucha choTe / kucha tAkatavara the to kucha kamajora / ve roTI ke Tukar3oM kI itanI AturatA se pratIkSA kara rahe the, mAno phuTabAla ke khilAr3I AuTa hue geMda ke zo kI pratIkSA kara rahe hoN| __mAlikana ne sabase pahale eka moTA Tukar3A usa kutte kI ora pheMkA jo aksara rAta meM usake makAna ke sAmane soyA karatA thaa| jaba bhI koI ajanabI udhara se nikalatA to vaha svAmI bhakti kA ijahAra karatA huA bhauMkane lgtaa| yadi koI ajanabI makAna meM praveza karane kI koziza karatA to vaha usake gale hI par3a jAtA thaa| zAyada isalie use pahale-pahala roTI kA Tukar3A phaiMkane meM mAlakina ne sabase jyAdA puNya samajhA / para jyoMhI roTI kA Tukar3A isa kutte ke sAmane girA sAre kutte usI ora jhapaTa par3e / vaha bhI kamajora to thA nahI, ata: bar3I tatparatA se usane usa Tukar3e ko apane muMha meM daboca liyaa| mAlakina ne deSa kattoM ke dhyAna ko usa ora se haTAne ke liye eka dUsarA Tukar3A phaikA / aba sAre kutte dUsare Tukar3e kI ora mur3a gye| usake lie Apasa meM chInAjhapaTI hone lgii| eka mariyala-se kutte ne sabase pahale usa Tukar3e ko apane muMha meM daboca liyA, kyoki vaha usake hI muMha ke Age Akara girA thaa| para dUsare hI kSaNa eka tagar3A kuttA usakI ora jhapaTA aura usake muMha se Tukar3A chIna liyA aba dhIre dhIre aura bhI Tukar3e phaike jAne lage, para ve saba unhIM ke pAsa pahuMca jAte the jo tagar3e the / kamajora kuttoM ke hAtha yadi be Aye bhI to na jAne unheM tagar3e kuttoM ke kitane dAMta va pa~joM ke prahAra sahane par3e / balki isa chInA-jhapaTI meM vicAre kucha kamajora kuttoM kI to itanI marammata huI ki ve to khAlI peTa hI bhIr3a se nikala kara eka ora khar3e ho ge| koI apanI TUTI TAMga ko adhara se laTakAye laDakhar3AtA huA cala rahA thA to koI darda ke mAre 'ceM-ceM' kara rahA thaa| yadyapi roTI pAne kI unakI lAlasA abhI marI nahIM thii| phira bhI ve pUcha hilAte hue AUTa hue khilAr3I kI bhAMti eka ora khaDe tamAzA dekha rahe the|

Page #94
bAsI Tukar3oM kA puNya / 63 maiM soca rahA thA ki inake mana meM vidroha kI Ag2a kyoM nahIM sulagatI ? ye kyoM nahIM kahate ki hameM bhI jIne kA adhikAra hai ? kyoM nahIM kamajora kutte apanA saMgaThana banA lete ? zAyada saMkhyA kI dRSTi se ve tagar3e kuttoM kI apekSA adhika the para unako isakA ehasAsa hI kahAM thA ? saMgaThita hita nAma kA unake pAsa koI nArA hI nahIM thaa| ve saba apane-apane hita ko sekane kI phikara meM rahane vAle prANI the| unheM bhI avasara milatA to zAyada ve bhI apane se kamajora kuttoM se roTI jhapaTane meM kamI nahIM rkhte| vAstava meM prANI jaba taka svArtha se Upara nahIM uThatA hai taba taka usameM karuNA kA srota phUTa nahIM sakatA / saca to yaha hai ki nisvArthatA hI sabameM var3A svArtha hai| bhalA jaba bahuta sAre manuSyoM meM bhI vaha niHsvArtha-bhAva nahIM AtA to kuttoM se aisI AzA karanA to gadhe ke sira para sIMga ugAne jaisA hI hai| hAM, unheM dekhakara mAlakina ke mana meM eka saMvedanA kI lahara avazya uThI / isalie usane zeSa roTiyAM unakI ora pheMkI, para unake nasIba meM ve kahA~ likhI thI ? tagaDe kutte jhapaTe aura unheM bhI sApha kara gaye / mujhe kucha logoM kI samAjavAdI sahAnubhUti yAda AyI aura maiM socane lagA ki -kyA kamajora prANiyoM kI niyati meM yahI badA hai ki ve sadA kamajora hI bane rheN|

Page #95
vivazatA dariyA kinAre base usa gAMva meM aura saba kucha thA para bhagavAna ke mandira kI eka bahuta bar3I kamI thI / skUla, aspatAla, sar3akeM, DAkaghara, pAnI kI TaMkI Adi to yahA~ ke jAgRta evaM pahu~cavAle logoM ne apane prabhAva se sarakAra se banavA liye the, para mandira ke mAmale meM sarakAra se koI sahakAra saMbhava nahIM thA / yadyapi naujavAnoM ko mandira jAne meM bahuta rasa nahIM thA, para jaba unake bUr3he mAM-bApa mauke bemauke mIloM paidala calakara par3ausa ke gAMva meM darzana karane ke lie jAte to unakA dila pasIja jAtA / kabhI-kabhI barasAta ke dinoM meM to unheM bhIgate-bhIgate bahate nAle se pAra honA par3atA thA taba to bAta aura bhI bedhaka bana jAtI thI / pichale varSa eka bur3hiyA to nAle meM baha hI gaI thI / aneka logoM ko bhIgane se jukAma ho gayA aura unameM se kucha to bhagavAna ke darabAra meM bhI pahu~ca gae the / isIlie yaha AvazyakatA yahA~ jvalaMta carcA kA viSaya banI huI thI / phira AsapAsa ke gAMvoM meM saba jagaha bhavya mandira bana gaye the / eka gAMva ke logoM ne to una para vyaMgya bhI kasa diyA thA ki sarakAra ke pAsa se tuma bahuta kucha karavA sakate ho, para apane gAMva meM mandira khar3A kara sako to hama jAneM / sacamuca yaha bAta yahA~ ke logoM ke lie eka cubhatI huI cunautI thI / ataH eka sAMjha eka anaupacArika bAtacIta meM hI kucha naujavAnoM ne bIr3A uThA liyA ki ve gAMvameM mandira avazya banavAyeMge / isameM koI sandeha nahIM thA ki vahA~ ke naujavAna zikSita, sabhya evaM karmazIla the / sarakAra kI hara sevA vibhAga meM bhI yahA~ kA koI na koI prabhAvazAlI sadasya sevArata thA / yadyapi Ama taura para sarakArI sevA meM rahane vAle

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vivazatA / 65 logoM kA apanA eka baMdhA-baMdhAyA ruTIna bana jAtA hai / aksara ve loga ghara se daphtara aura daphtara se ghara kA rAstA hI jAnate haiM / bahuta huA to chuTTI ke dina apane parivAra yA mitroM ke sAtha idhara-udhara manoraMjana kara lete haiN| isake sivA dUsaroM ke sukha-duHkha meM bhAgI bananA yA sArvajanika kAmoM ke prati dilacaspI rakhanA unake svabhAva meM nahIM hotA, para yahA~ ke naujavAna isa bAta ke apavAda the| isIlie ve kisI kaThina kArya ko bhI apane hAtha meM le lete the aura apane bujargoM ke AzIrvAda se use pAra bhI lagA dete the / isIlie unhoMne mandirake nirmANa kI bAta ko bhI apane hAtha meM le liyaa| para kaThinAI to yaha thI ki isake lie artha kahA~ se juTAyA jAe ? yaha bahuta kama saMbhava thA ki naukarI-peze vAle AdamI bahuta adhika Arthika sahayoga kara sakeM, kyoMki unheM jo kucha vetana milatA hai vaha to prAyaH dainika AvazyakatAoM meM hI pUrA ho jAtA hai| pArivArika jIvana se sambandhita yA tIja-tyauhAra se sambandhita jo atirikta kharca una para A par3atA hai usake lie to unakA bajaTa pahale se hI dhATe meM calatA hai| phira jo loga svAbhimAnI hoM, unake lie bhraSTa tarIkoM kA daravAz2A bhI banda rahatA hai| ataH usake lie bahuta adhika kharca kara pAnA saMbhava nahIM thaa| isI dRSTi se kucha utsAhI vyaktiyoM kI eka sImita banA lI gaI jo sAre kArya ko anjAma de sake / use sampUrNa adhikAra de diye gae ki vaha jo kucha karegI use saba loga saharSa svIkAra kara leNge| phira bhI artha kI dRSTi se sabhI logoM kA dhyAna seTha dhanasukha bhAI para TikA huA thA / yadyapi unake pAsa dhana to kAphI thA, para sAmAnya logoM ke sAtha unakA samparka bahuta ochA thA / sArvajanika bhalAI kI daSTi se bhI unheM aba taka paisA kharca karane kA avasara nahIM milA thaa| unameM svayaM meM to yaha pravRtti thI hI nahIM gAMva ke loga bhI unakI gulAmI karane kI apekSA aba taka sArA kArya sarakArI stara para karavA lenA acchA samajhate the / para aba bhArI kharcA sAmane thaa| ata: eka ravivAra ke dina mandira samiti ke sabhI sadasya apanI yojanA lekara seThajI ke ghara para upasthita hue / catura seTha ne bar3e mIThe zabdoM meM unakA svAgata kiyA, baiThane ___

Page #97
96 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI ke lie UMcA Asana diyA, ThaMDA pAnI pilaayaa| kucha idhara-udhara kI carcA karane ke bAda pUchA - Aja Apa sabane mere ghara ko pavitra kaise kiyA ? samiti ke eka sadasya ne zAnta bhAva se kahA-hama loga gAMva meM eka mandira kI yojanA lekara Apake sAmane upasthita hue haiN| seThajI--yaha to Apane bahuta hI sundara bAta batAI / bhalA isase bar3hakara hamAre lie aura saubhAgya kI kyA bAta ho sakatI hai ki gAMva meM mandira bane ? sadasya---hAM, isIlie hamane yaha bIr3A uThA liyA hai, para Apa jAnate haiM yaha kAma bahuta bar3A hai| ise Apake sahayoga se hI pUrA kiyA jA sakatA hai| seThajI -bahuta acchA, para maiM akelA kyA kara sakatA hUM? yaha to sAre gAMva kA kAma hai / ataH isameM sahayoga karanA to apanA dharma hai, para Apane yojanA kaise banAI hai ? sadasya----yojanA ko antima rUpa to ApakI sahamati se hI diyA jA skegaa| Apa dekha lIjie, yaha yojanA hai / hamArA anumAna hai ki kharcA bIsa hajAra se jyAdA hI hogaa| seThajI-Apane jo anumAna lagAyA hai vaha to ThIka hI hai / para mandira kA kharca to bAra-bAra nahIM hotaa| yaha kisI eka vyaktikA to hai nahIM, sAre gAMva kA hai| isalie aisA nahIM honA cAhie ki hama apane par3osa vAle gAMva se kama raha jaaeN| sadasya -- para isake lie to paise kA savAla hai ? seThajI--are, Apa saba loga haiM taba paise kI kyA cintA ? maiM bhI apanA tuccha sahayoga pradAna karUMgA, para isake lie hameM jarA buddhimAnI se kAma karanA hogaa| sadasya---isIlie to hama Apake pAsa hAjira hue haiN| seThajI---nahIM, maiM kyA cIja huuN| maiM to Apa jo kaheMge vaha karane ke lie taiyAra hUM, para kyA mandira para kisI dAnadAtA kA nAma lagAnA acchA nahIM rahegA?

Page #98
vivazatA | 67 sadasya-dAna karane vAle to bahuta sAre hoMge / sabakA nAma kaise lagAyA jA sakegA ? hAM, andara eka ora unake nAma kI sUcI avazya lagAI jA sakatI hai| seThajI-nahIM, merA matalaba thA ki koI AdamI paisA lagAtA hai to prati dAna avazya cAhatA hai| ataH aisA kareM, jo vyakti sabase jyAdA paisA de usakA nAma Upara lagavA deN| sadasya-~-dAna kA sabase bar3A pratidAna to tyAga hI hai / yaha to bhagavAna kA mandira hai| hama ise bhagavAna kA mandira hI rahane denA cAhate haiM / yaha ucita nahIM lagatA ki aise sthAna para paise ko biThAyA jaae| seThajI-nahIM, merA matalaba Apa samajhe nhiiN| Upara aura nIce nAma likhane meM koI pharka nahIM hai| jaisA nIce vaisA Upara / isa acche kAma meM kisI kA nAma Upara AtA hai to hameM etarAja nahIM honA caahie| sadasya - hamArA Azaya to yahI hai ki kisI ke pAsa yadi dhana hai to usakA sadupayoga kiyA jaae| pUrva ke puNya se use dhana milA hai| Age ke puNya ke lie use usakA sadupayoga karanA caahie| yadi nAma Upara AyegA to usa vyakti kA puNya kSINa hogaa| hama nahIM cAhate ki hama usake nimita bane / seThajI- maiM Apake vicAra se sahamata hU~, para Ajakala jamAnA hI aisA hai ki sIdhI aMgulI se ghI nikalatA hI nhiiN| yadi koI isa bahAne bhI apanA kucha paisA isa puNya kArya meM lagatA hai to hameM use avasara denA cAhie, yaha merA sujhAva hai| Apa loga bhI mere sujhAva para vicAra kreN| isa zubha kAma meM yadi kucha samaya laga jAe to bhI koI bAta nahIM hai, para hamArA kAma saba dRSTiyoM se uttama honA caahie| paise kI apane pAsa koI kamI nahIM hai| pAsa vAle gAMva kI apekSA apanA kArya bar3hiyA honA caahie| yaha kisI kA vyaktigata ahaMkAra nahIM hai, apitu sAre gA~va ke gaurava kA savAla hai|

Page #99
68 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI samiti ke sadasyoM ne seThajI kA Azaya samajha liyaa| ataH vicAra karane kA bahAnA banAkara uTha aae| bAhara Akara bAta karane lage- seTha hamAre sAtha saudebAjI kara rahA hai| zAyada vaha paisA to de degA, para usake bala para hameM kharIdanA cAhatA hai| yadi bhagavAna kA mandira paise vAle kA mandira bana gayA to hamAre lie isase bar3hakara lajjA kI bAta aura kyA hogI? para paise ke binA mandira kaise banegA? eka sadasya ne puuchaa| samiti ke arthamaMtrI ne jo eksAija Aphisa meM heDaklarka bhI the, kahA - Apa meM dama hai, to paise ke binA koI kArya nahIM ruka sktaa| hA~, yaha bAta ThIka hai ki paisA Akhira vahIM se pAyegA, jahAM vaha hai| ataH jisakA jitanA sAmarthya hai, vaha dila kholakara paisA de| jo paisA na de sake, vaha zramadAna kre| usake bAda bhI paise kI AvazyakatA rahegI, to maiM laauuNgaa| sadasya---- Apa kahAM se lAyeMge ? arthamaMtrI--kahIM se lAUM, para isakI jimmedArI maiM letA huuN| Apa jAnate haiM, hamAre hAthoM se roz2a lAkhoM rupaye nikalate haiN| ata: mujhe paisA bar3A nahIM lagatA, para usa ghamaMDI baniye ko yaha dikhA denA hai ki usake binA koI kAma rukA nahIM raha sakatA ! dharma ke sAtha saudebAjI nahIM cala sktii| sadasya--to phira Apa koI choTA deharA khar3A kara do| thor3e paise meM kAma cala jaaegaa| bar3I yojanA ke lie bar3e paise kI AvazyakatA hogii| arthamaMtrI-taba phira hamArI bAta hI kyA rahI ? sadasya-~-bAta hI rahane kA savAla hai, taba seTha kI na rahI ApakI raha gii| isameM pharka kyA par3atA hai ? yaha to dharma kA kAma hai| isameM bAta vAta kA koI savAla nahIM hai| arthamaMtrI- isIlie to maiM kahatA hU~, mujhe nAma kI jarUrata nhiiN| bhagavAna kA mandira kisI vyakti-vizeSa kA mandira nahIM bananA caahie| paise kI bhI vyavasthA maiM kyA karUMgA, bhagavAna apane-Apa kareMge,

Page #100
vivazatA / 66 para usake lie hamArA kAma nahIM rukanA cAhie / 1 arthamaMtrI ke pAsa paisA to adhika nahIM thA, para usakI bAta kA itanA bharosA thA ki vaha sabake dila meM jaMca gii| saba jAnate the ki vaha jo kaha detA hai, use karake chor3atA hai / ataH sAre gAMva meM utsAha kI eka jabaradasta lahara daur3a gii| sabhI logoM ne . apanI-apanI sAmarthya ke anusAra, balki usase kucha jyAdA hI dhana diyA / jo loga Arthika sahayoga karane kI sthiti meM nahIM the, unhoMne zramadAna karanA zurU kara diyaa| sabhI loga anubhava kara rahe the, jaise yaha unakA apanA ghara hI bana rahA hai / bar3ebUr3he aura sampanna loga bhI zramadAna kara apane-Apa ko puNyazAlI mAna rahe the / eka bur3hiyA to patthara Dhote hue girakara mara bhI gaI, para kisI ne usake prati duHkha prakaTa nahIM kiyaa| sabhI logoM ne yahI kahA ki vaha bahuta bhAgyazAlinI thI, jo usakI haDDI mandira kI nIMva meM kAma AyI / kisI kI majadUrI kA to koI prazna hI nahIM thA / kevala bAhara se jo kArIgara Aye the, unakI majadUrI cukAnI par3atI thii| Arthika sahayoga bhI apane Apa juTatA jA rahA thA / na jAne kahAM se paisA AtA ? kisI bAta kI kamI nahIM anubhava ho rahI thI / sabhI kA eka hI svara thA ki mandira zAnadAra bane / itanA zAnadAra ki AsapAsa ke loga use dekhane ke lie AeM / samudra ke sAmane eka UMce TIle para joroM se kAma cala rahA thA / aura aba to pUrva yojanA meM bhI bahuta aMtara A gayA thA / pahale kI apekSA aba Age bar3ha gaI thI, phira bhI kAma dina dUnA aura cala rahA thA / vaha dugunI se rAta caugunA seTha kI kalpanA thI ki gAMva ke loga usake pAsa Akara nAka ragar3eMge / ve bar3e ahasAna ke sAtha apanA nAma mandira ke sAtha jor3eMge, para aisA nahIM huA / koI AdamI usake pAsa candA mAMgane ke lie bhI nahIM aayaa| hAM eka dina eksAija oNphisa kI ora se patra avazya milaa| usa meM unake gupta vyavasAya ke bAre

Page #101
100 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI meM pUchatAcha kI gaI thii| use par3hakara seTajI ke to hoza guma ho ge| aba to unheM svayaM mandira nirmANa samiti ke arthamaMtrI ke ghara jAnA par3A / arthamaMtrI ne kahA-seThajI ! yaha kAma to hajAroM meM nahIM, lAkhoM meM nipaTegA / badanAmI hogI, vaha alg| ataH Apa saMbhala jaaie| seThajI ne gir3agir3Akara kahA-isIlie tumhAre pAsa zAyA huuN| yaha kAma tumhAre vibhAga kA hai, kisI taraha merI mukti karA do| isake badale meM tuma jo bhI mAMgoge, vaha dUgAM / arthamaMtrI ne seThajI ko jhiTakate hue kahAseThajI ! Apako yaha kahate hue zarma nahIM AtI ! mere lie pApa kA paisA dhUla ke barAbara hai / seThajI ne saMbhalate hue kahA-nahIMnahIM, merA Azaya vaha thA ki maiM mandira meM tuma kaho utanA paisA lagA duuNgaa| arthamaMtra--para mandira kA kAma to acchI taraha cala rahA hai| seThajI ----cala rahA hai to use aura vaDhAnA, para merI mukti karAnI hogii| kAphI anunaya-vinaya ke bAda Akhira cAlisa hajAra meM saudA paTA / usa para seThajI ne kahA--tuma isa paise kI carcA kisI ke pAsa mata karanA / tuma merA yaha kAma nikAla do maiM tumhArA ahasAna mAnUMgA / arthamaMtrI mana hI mana apanI yojanA kI saphalatA se khuza hokara soca rahA thA ki kyA aneka mandiroM kI nIMvoM meM aisA hI kucha vivaza dAna nahIM chipA huA hai ?

Page #102
garIbI haTAo kizana camAra behada garIba thaa| usake pAsa bahuta thor3I sI jamIna thI usI para khetI kara vaha apane parivAra kA gujArA kiyA karatA thA / eka dina vaha seTha candUlAla ke ghara AyA / saubhAgya se seTha jI ghara para hI mila gae / unhoMne bar3I AtmIyatA se pUchA- 'kyoM kizana ! Aja kaise A gaye ho? kizana ne hAtha jor3ate hue kahA-~-mAlika ! AyA to kucha kAma se hI thaa| bahuta acchA-seThajI ne kahA, samaya para tuma loga mujhe yAda kara lete ho / bhagavAn kI mere para bar3I kRpA hai / bolo kyA kAma hai ?, kizana ne jhijhakate hue cA~dI ke kar3e apanI phaTI huI aMgarakhI kI jeba se nikAlate hue kahA --- 'maiMne rAmadeva jI bolamA bolI huI haiN| kala unakA prasAda karanA hai / ata: kucha paisoM kI AvazyakatA hai|' seThajI ne bar3I madhuratA se pUchA- kitane paise cAhie ?' kizana- 'sau rupaye kI AvazyakatA hai| ye kar3e Apa rakha lIjie aura mujhe rupae de diijie|' ___ seThajI- ulAhanA dete, hue kizana ! tU apanA AdamI hai, para lagatA hai ki tumane mujhe samajhA nahIM / tumhArA aura merA dhara koI alaga-alaga thor3e hI hai ! rAmadeva jI mahArAja kA prasAda karanA hai, to usakA thor3AsA puNya to mujhe bhI kamAne do| kizana-'mAlika, Apake puNya kI kyA bAta kahU~ ? bhagavAn kI Apa para aTUTa kRpA hai jo Apako itanA paisA de rakhA hai| Apake mana meM

Page #103
102 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI mere jaise kIr3e ke lie sthAna hai, yahI mere lie kAphI hai|' seTha-'kAphI hotA, to tuma ye gahane lekara nahIM aate| inheM vApasa le jAo / lo sau rupaye / ThATha se prasAda karanA / bhagavAn se jarA mere lie bhI duA maaNgnaa| kizana --- 'seThajI ! yaha no ApakI kRpA hai, para gahane yahA~ par3e raheM yA vahA~ par3e raheM, isameM kyA pharaka par3atA hai| kabhI merI niyata bigar3a jAe, corI ho jAe, aura bhI na jAne kyA ho jAe, isalie inheM Apa apane pAsa hI rakheM / yahAM jyAdA surakSita rheNge|' seThajI--'kizana, tU bholA hai / maiMne tujhe kabhI parAyA nahIM smjhaa| ye rupae koI vApasa thor3e hI karane hai ? hAM, merA jarA eka kAma kara denA kizana-'kyA kAma ? maiM yadi Apake koI kAma A saka, to bar3I prasannatA hogii|' seThajI-'hAM, tuma kara sakate ho, isIlie to kaha rahA hU~ / Ajakala sarakAra kaI prakAra ke RNa de rahI hai| RNa sImAMta kRSakoM ko saste byAja para diye jA rahe haiN| usake anusAra tIna bIghe se pAMca bIghe vAle kisAnoM ko Arthika sahAyatA milatI hai / tumheM bailoM kI AvazyakatA ho to bolo? kizana---'maiM bailoM kI jor3I kA kyA karUgA ?' seThajI - 'hAM-tumheM AvazyakatA nahIM usako paisA diyA jA rahA hai aura jisako paise kI AvazyakatA hai, ve baiThe tAka rahe haiN|' ___kizana --- seThajI ! Apake tAkane kI kyA bAta hai ? Apako to bhagavAn ne yo hI bahuta de rakhA hai|' seThajI----'para, 'rAvalA kA tela palle meM hI jhela' sarakAra kA RNa vyartha kyoM jAne diyA jAe ? aura sarakAra bhI to Akhira hamArI hI hai| taba phira usake dvArA bAMTe jAne vAle paisoM se kyoM muMha mor3A jAe ? tU aisA kara, yaha phArma maiM tere nAma bhare detA huuN| tU apanA aMgUThA lagA de| isase pandraha sau rupaye mileMge / dasa varSoM meM dhIre-dhIre kistoM para paisA cukAnA ' par3egA, so maiM cukAtA rhuuNgaa| tujhe kucha nahIM karanA pdd'egaa| kevala baila lAne ke lie mele jAnA par3egA, tere sAtha maiM rAmesara ko bheja dUgA / donoM

Page #104
garIbI haTAo / 103 acchI-sI bailoM kI jor3I cuna lenA / pazuoM kA DAkTara bhI vahA~ tumhAre sAtha hogA / vaha jaba bailoM ko sarTiphAI kara degA, to vahIM baiMka kA AdamI paisA cukA degA / baila mere yahA~ bA~dha jAnA / dhIre-dhIre kistoM se paisA cukA dUMgA / kabhI tere dastakhatoM kI AvazyakatA huI to aMgUThA karavA lUMgA / ' kizana ko isameM koI burI bAta nahIM lagI / vaha socane lagA-' - 'mujhe bailoM kI jarUrata nahIM hai / seThajI ko jarUrata hai / inako koI phAyadA hotA hai to hone do, apanA kyA lagatA hai|' eka bAra usake mana meM saMdeha bhI ubharA 'kahIM seThajI mere sAtha cAra sau bIsI to nahIM khela rahe haiM ?' para dUsare hI kSaNa usane vicAra kiyA 'seThajI mujhase kitane pra ema se bAta kara rahe haiN| kyA ve mujhe dhokhA deMge ? aura phira usakA dhyAna apane hAtha meM kulabulA rahe sau rupayoM kI ora gayA / seThajI lAbha kamAte haiM to kamAne do Akhira mujhe bhI to ye sau rupaye de rahe haiM / apanA kaunase kA~ToM meM hAtha jA rahA hai / ' aura anta meM usane phArma para aMgUThe kA nizAna lagA diyA / seThajI ne use pAnI pilAyA / bIr3I bhI pilaaii| hara taraha se Aravasta kiyaa| kahA 'kabhI jarUrata par3e, to mujhe bhUlanA mata / ise apanA hI ghara samajhanA / hama to tumhIM logoM se kamA kara khAte hai / tumhI hamAre annadAtA ho / hAM, ina sau rupaye kI bAta kisI se kahanA mt| yaha merI ora se bhagavAna ke nAma para guptadAna hai / kisI ko kaha diyA, to merA puNya naSTa ho jAegA / ' kizana to jaise pAnI-pAnI ho gayA / usane cAMdI ke kar3e, sau rupaye apanI jeba meM rakha lie aura apane ghara lauTa aayaa| ghara meM aba bar3I khuziyAM manAI gayI / yAra-dostoM ne kizana se pUchA - 'rupae kahAM se lAye ?' para vaha prazna ko vilakula TAla gayA / bolA- 'bhagavAn kI kRpA ho to paise kI kyA kamI rahatI haiM / tumhArI bhAbhI ne jamA kara rakhA thA / kisI ne kahA - ' aurata kitanI catura hai ki cupake-cupake paise bacA lie / ' kisI ne kahA - 'aurata kitanI badamAza hai ki chipe-chipe paisA jamA kara liyA / ' para saba prasAda pAkara masta ho gaye / kizana kI mastI

Page #105
104 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI kA to koI pAra hI nahIM thaa| kucha dinoM bAda vaha rAmesara ke sAtha jAkara mele meM se eka acchI bailoM kI jor3I kharIda lAyA aura use seThajI ke bAr3e meM bA~dha diyaa| dhIre-dhIre samaya nikalatA gyaa| kAnUnI khAnApUti karanA to seThajI jAnate hI the, balki ve svayaM gAMva ke sarapaMca the| kAnUna ke sAre rAste to unake ghara se hokara nikalate the / ataH seThajI ko koI parezAnI nahIM huii| unhoMne do kiztoM ke rupaye bhI bhara die / unake mana meM dhokhA karane kI koI bAta nahIM thii| ve to kevala yahI cahAte the ki pandraha sau rupayoM meM pAMca sau anAvartaka hai, ve to apane ho hI jaaeNge| zeSa hajAra rupae bhI saste byAja para mila rahe haiN| aura phira unhoMne yaha bhI socA ki pandraha sau ke bailoM ko khilA-pilA kara do hajAra meM beca deMge to pA~ca sau rupae ve bhI cita ho jAyege / ataH ve bhI bahuta prasanna the| para vidhi kA vidhAna kucha dUsarA hI thA / acAnaka kucha dinoM ke bAda seThajI kA. dehAnta ho gyaa| pIche se kizteM nahIM cukAI gaI / ataH sarakAra kI ora se kizana ke nAma kizteM cukAne kA noTisa AyA / vaha use dekhakara daMga raha gyaa| bhalA sarakAra se usakA kyA lenA denA ! sArI bAta jAna lene para vaha noTisa lekara seThajI ke putroM ke pAsa gyaa| unhoMne uttara de diyAhameM isa bAta kA koI patA nhiiN| seThajI ne hameM isa viSaya meM kucha nahIM batAyA |'kishn unake sAmane royA dhoyaa| sArI bAta vistAra se batAI, para seThajI ke beTe Tasa se masa nahIM hue| unhoMne kahA -- noTisa tumhAre nAma hai tuma jAno aura noTisa jaane| hama isa mAmale meM kucha nahIM kara sakate / tumheM koI kAma karanA thA to likhA-par3hI ke hisAba se karanA thaa| hamAre yahA~ tumhArI koI likhA-par3hI nahIM hai|' kizana nirAza ho kara lauTa aayaa| socA--jaba sarakAra ke AdamI AeMge to bhaMDAphor3a kara dUMgA / kucha dina yo hI bIta gye| sarakAra kA phira noTisa aayaa| usane usa para bhI koI kArravAI nahIM kI / Akhira baiMka kI ora se kurkI kA Adeza huA / sarakAra ke AdamI pulisa ko lekara usake makAna para Ae / kizana to unheM dekha kara hakkA-bakkA raha gyaa| Akhira sArA bheda mAlUma huA to usane kahA--'maiMne to baila

Page #106
garIbI haTAo | 105 kharIde nhiiN|' sarakArI aphasara ne kahA-'kharIde nahIM to yaha agUThA kisakA hai ! aura ye do kisteM kisane cukAI haiM ! ___ aMta meM kizana ne seThajI kA sArA bhaMDAphor3a karate hue kahA-'baila to seThajI ke bAr3e meM baMdhe haiN| sarakArI adhikAriyoM ko dAla meM kucha kAlA lagA to ve seThajI ke putroM ke pAsa gae / seThajI ke putroM ne bAta ko Age na bar3hAne kI dRSTi se unakI jeba garama kara dI / unakA rAjanIti ko dRSTi se isa kSetra meM prabhAva bhI thA / sthAnIya ema.ela.e. se to unakI riztedArI bhI thI / ataH sarakArI adhikArI una se daba ge| gAMva ke anya loga bhI kucha nahIM kara sake, kyoMki pichale cunAva meM gAMva meM bhaMyakara phUTa par3a gaI thI, ata: kizana kA pakSa lekara apane ko jalIla banAne ke lie koI taiyAra nahIM huA / aMta meM adhikAriyoM ne apane rupaye vasUla karane lie kizana ke ghara ko nilAma kara diyaa| usakA sAmAna bAhara nikAla diyA gyaa| vaha apanI gIlI AkhoM se apane ghara ke sAmane khar3A dIvAra para lage 'garIbI haTAo ke posTara ko dekha rahA thaa|

Page #107
hisA kI tasvIra : ahiMsA kA phrema usa dina maiM eka bahuta bar3e seTha ke ghara mehamAna thA / usakA kaI jagaha vyApAra calatA thaa| jisa kamare meM mujhe ThaharAyA gayA vaha bahuta acchI taraha se sajAyA huA thA / Adhunika sukha-suvidhAoM se paripUrNa usa kamare meM eka aura selpha para bhagavAn buddha kI karuNApUrita mUrti rakhI haI thI, to dUsarI ora gItA hAtha meM liye hue mahAtmA gAMdhI kA citra thaa| maiM soca rahA thA ki eka jaina parivAra hote hue bhI yahAM bhagavAna mahAvIra kI tasavIra kyoM nahIM hai ? zAyada mahAvIra kI tasavIra lagAne meM mUrtipUjA kA sUkSma khatarA anubhava kiyA hogA / para buddha aura gAMdhI ke sAtha mUrti pUjA kA koI khatarA nahIM hai to vaha akele mahAvIra ke sAtha kaise ho sakatA hai ! maiM isa viSaya meM apane mana meM vicAra kara hI rahA thA ki itane meM pichale daravAje se 'khar3iyA miTTI le lo', 'khar3iyA miTTI le lo' kI AvAz2a aaii| nizcaya hI usa AvAz2a se yaha pahacAnA jA sakatA thA ki yaha kisI vRddha mahilA ke kaMThoM se nikalatA huA svara hai| para maiMne sajagatApUrvaka usa para dhyAna nahIM diyaa| dUsarI bAra phira AvAz2a AI aura bar3I-bar3I dIvAroM se TakarAkara kho gyii| kisI ne koI uttara nahIM diyA / ___koThI ke prAMgana kA daravAjA bilakula galI meM khulatA thaa| vaha jamIna se jyAdA UMcA bhI nahIM thaa| ata: bur3hiyA AMgana ke daravAje taka caDha gayI aura apane popale muMha se phira miTTI kharIdane kI AvAz2a dene lgii| aba vaha merI dRSTi ke bilakula sAmane thii| usakA ceharA jhuriyoM se bharA huA thaa| kamara jhuka gayI thii| kapar3e maile tathA jagaha-jagaha se phaTe hue

Page #108
hiMsA kI tasvIra : ahiMsA kA phrema | 107 the| hAtha meM eka TUTI huI lakar3I thI / usI ke sahAre dhIre-dhIre kadama bar3hAte hue sira para khar3iyA miTTI kA bartana rakhe vaha A~gana kI deharI taka Upara car3ha AI thii| chAyA meM khar3I hokara usane apanA pasInA poNchaa| ___eka minaTa ke lie mere mana meM prazna uThA--saMgamaramara ke isa mahala meM Akhira khar3iyA miTTI kI kyA AvazyakatA hogI? para dUsare hI kSaNa isakA samAdhAna bhI mila gyaa| rAjasthAna ke Ama rivAz2a ke anusAra dIpAvalI ke avasara para makAna ke kucha hisse ko miTTI se potakara usa para hiramica se bhAMti-bhAMti ke citra ukere jAte haiN| hAlAMki gobara se lipe makAnoM ke pharza para ve citra jyAdA khilate haiM, para phira bhI paramparA ke anusAra hara ghara meM usa prathA ko nibhAyA jAtA hai / cUMki aba dIpAvalI nikaTa A gayI thI, isIlie bur3hiyA miTTI lekara use becane nikalI thii| bhale hI sAga ghI aura masAloM se svAdiSTa banatA hai, para usameM namaka kA bhI apanA eka sthAna hai / usI prakAra seTha jI ke isa devopama makAna meM khar3iyA miTTI kA bhI apanA eka upayoga thaa| isI AzA se bur3hiyA vahA~ phuNcii| na jAne usake kitane aramAna jamI huI miTTI kI tahoM ke bIca kulabulA rahe the / zAyada lakSmI-pUjA ke lie sAmagrI juTAne hetu hI vaha itanA kaThina parizrama kara rahI / na jAne isane kitanI bAra lakSmI kI pUjA kI hogI, phira bhI abhI taka lakSmI isa para prasanna nahIM hii| deza kA durbhAgya hai ki kahIM sadA dIpAvalI manAyI jAtI hai, to kahIM dIpAvalI ke dina bhI miThAI hAtha nahIM aatii| maiM isa vicAra-pravAha meM bahA jA rahA thA ki itane meM eka naukarAnI udhara A niklii| AMgana kI deharI para bur3hiyA ko khar3I dekhakara use ekadama gussA ho paayaa| garajatI huI bolI-"are coTI! Upara kyoM AI ?" bur3hiyA ne gir3agir3Ate svara meM kahA - "bAI jI ! dIpAvalI ke dina haiM, jarUrata ho to thor3I miTTI le liijie|" usake svaroM meM vyApArika kauzala na hokara eka dIna yAcanA thii| maiMne dekhA, bhUkha ne usake svAbhimAna ko hI mAra diyA / para, bhalA seThajI kI naukarAnI ko yaha uttara kahAM se pacatA ? vaha aura bhI teja hokara bolI-nIce utaratI hai ki nahIM ? detI hUM dhakkA ! AyI hai miTTI becane kahIM ? A~gana sUnA

Page #109
108 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI dekhakara corI karane to nahIM AyI ? bur3hiyA ne usa Aropa kA koI pratikAra nahIM kiyaa| vaha isa Aropa se hataprabha ho gyii| itane meM naukarAnI ne use dhakkA diyA aura vaha nIce jA girii| usake zarIra meM gaharI coTa AI, para vaha 'kucha nahIM bolii| dhIre-dhIre uThI aura Age bar3ha gyii| yadyapi Asa-pAsa meM kaI loga khar3e the, para moTI koThI vAle seTajI kI naukarAnI ke viruddha koI muMha nahIM khola skaa| maiMne bhI eka sabhya mehamAna ke nAte usa naukarAnI se ulajhanA ucita nahIM samabhA, phira bhI mujhase rahA nahIM gayA / maiMne naukarAnI se kahA-- "tumhAre pAsa kyA pramANa hai, jisake AdhAra para tumane bur3hiyA ko cora kahA !" usane uttara diyA--bAbU jI ! Apa ina bAtoM ko nahIM samajha sakate / Apa loga UMce mahaloM meM baiThe rahate haiM / jana sAmAnya kI harakatoM kA Apako koI patA nahIM rhtaa| hamArA inase sadA pAlA par3atA haiM, isalie hama inake ceharoM ko pahacAna sakate haiN|" ___maiMne phira kahA--''yahI to maiM pUchatA hU~, tumane kaise pahacAnA ki vaha cora thI !" ___ naukarAnI ne mujhe eka tIkhI dRSTi se dekhakara kahA--"to Apane nahIM dekhA / dhakkA khAkara bhI vaha kucha nahIM bolii| cora nahIM hotI to kyA vaha cupa rahatI ? aparAdhI mana pratikAra karane kA sAhasa kho detA ___ maiM usake tarka se dabA to nahIM, phira bhI maiMne mAnavIya pakSa ko chor3a kara kAnUnI pakSa para bAta karate hue kahA--"yadi tumheM usake cora hone kA sandeha thA to tuma thAne meM use pakar3avA sakatI thIM, para isa taraha kisI vyakti ko dhakkA de denA anyAya hai| isa para kAnUnI kAryavAhI kI jA sakatI hai|" ___isa bAra naukarAnI ne apane cehare kA raMga badalakara tunakakara kahAto Apa yahA~ kAnUnI kAryavAhI karane ke lie Ae haiM ?" itanA kahakara vaha jaldI se merI AMkhoM se ojhala ho gyii|

Page #110
hiMsA kI tasvIra : ahiMsA kA phema | 106 phira merA dhyAna selpha para rakhI bhagavAna buddha kI mUrti aura dIvAra para TaMgI mahAtmA gAMdhI kI tasavIra kI ora calA gyaa| maiMne socA, yaha acchA hI huA ki isa nighRNa hiMsA kA sAkSya hone ke lie parama ahiMsaka "bhagavAna mahAvIra kI tasavIra yahA~ nahIM hai|

Page #111
sArvajanika jIvana haiDa mAsTara sAhaba ne Aja hI skUla kA dAyitva saMbhAlA thaa| bilkula TUTA-phUTA bhavana, avyavasthita sAmAna, ukhar3e hue adhyApaka, uchRMkhala lar3ake, rUkhe graamvaasii| unheM eka kSaNa ke lie lagA, kyoM maiMne ema0 ela0 e0 sAhaba se lar3AI mola lI ? acche gA~va meM acchI taraha jamA huA thA / maiMne hI to jamAyA thA usa skUla ko, para kevala ema0 ela0 e0 sAhaba ke lar3ake ko avaidha tarIke se navIM kakSA se uttIrNa nahIM kiyA, usakA yaha pariNAma bhugatanA par3a rahA hai / sthAnAntaraNa ho gayA, isakA bhI koI duHkha nahIM / duHkha hai to kevala isI bAta kA ki maiM jhUThe gabana ke Aropa se lA~chita huA / bhagavAna jAnatA haiM merI galatI nahIM thI, para bar3A catura hai vaha ema0 ela0 e0 / sAre gA~va ko bhar3akA diyA / lar3akoM ko ukasAyA aura zikSakoM ko phor3a liyaa| khaira jo honA thA, vaha ho gayA, para eka adhyA-paka ke nAte merA yaha dharma hai ki maiM jahA~ bhI jAUM, samAja kI bhalAI karUM / sarakAra mujhe tanakhvAha detI hai, usake badale meM maiM skUla meM sevA karatA hUM / samAja kA bhI mujha para RNa hai, ataH mujhe skUla ko acchI taraha jamAnA hai / I 1 kucha dinoM bAda skUla jama gayA / lar3ake DhaMga se bAta karane lage / zikSaka samaya para Ane aura ImAnadArI se kAma karane lage / heDa mAsTara sAhaba ne eka dina gA~va ke logoM ko ikaTThA kiyA / sabakA dhyAna skUla ke bhavana kI ora khiiNcaa| bhalA skUla kA bhavana acchA bane, isameM kisI ko kyA Apatti ho sakatI thI ! ataH sabhI loga isa prastAva se bar3e prasanna hue, para gA~va ke seThajI ne socA ki kahIM bAta mere para na A jAe / ataH use Tara

Page #112
sArvajanika jIvana / 111 kAne kI dRSTi se unhoMne kahA "bhavana bane yaha to acchA hai, para paisA kahA~ se AegA ?" heDa mAsTara sAhaba ne kahA - ''vaise paisA to vahIM se AegA, jahAM vaha hai| mere jaise vyakti to paisA de nahIM sakate, phira bhI hama gAMva ko bAdhya nahIM kareMge / jo jitanA degA. utanA saharSa svIkAra kara leMge / yadi paisA kama huA to caMdA karane ke lie bAhara jaaeNge| Akhira isameM kisI vyakti vizeSa kA to svArtha hai nahIM, yaha to sAre gAMva kI bhalAI kA savAla hai / logoM ko hamAre kAma para vizvAsa ho jAegA to paise kI kamI nahIM rhegii|" seThajI ko to AzvAsana mila gayA, para sarapaMca ke mana meM saMdeha ubharane lgaa| aksara AdamI ke mana meM vahI saMdeha ubharatA hai, jisameM se vaha svayaM gujaratA hai| ataH sarapaMca ne socA-yahA~ pahale bhI kaI heDa mAsTara A cuke haiN| kisI ne bhI skUla ke bhavana meM itanI dilacaspI nahIM lii| yaha heDa mAsTara itanI dilacaspI dikhAtA hai, isakA koI kAraNa honA cAhie / zAyada yaha bhI bIca meM kucha hAtha seMkanA cahatA hogaa| pichale gAMva se isI mAmale meM badanAma hokara AyA hai / ata: isase sAvadhAna rahane kI AvazyakatA hai / isIlie usane bhI se pana milane kI kaThinAI ko dohraayaa| para gA~va kA bahumata pakSa meM thA, ata: caMdA huA / usase kAma calane vAlA nahIM thA / ataH heDa mAsTara sAhaka, seTajI aura sarapaMca .. tIna AdamiyoM kI eka samiti isa kArya ke lie niyukta kI gayI / heDa mAsTara sAhaba usake mukhiyA the| ve hoziyAra to the hI sAtha hI kucha kara gujarane kI kSamatA bhI rakhate the| ata: ucita samaya para skUla se chuTTI lekara donoM vyaktiyoM ke sAtha caMdA lAne ke lie bAhara nikala pdd'e| sacamuca logoM se paisA nikalavAnA bar3A kaThina kAma hai, para heDa mAsTara sAhaba ke vyaktitva se prabhAvita hokara pandraha dinoM meM bIsa hajAra rupaye daraThe ho gae ' sarapaMca ko yaha bAta jarA akharI, kyoMki usakI apanI bAta jhUThI hotI jA rahI thii| eka-do jagaha usane caMdA dene vAloM ko gumarAha karane kI koziza bhI kI, para heDa mAsTara ke sAmane usakI eka

Page #113
112 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI nahIM cala sakI / aba to sarapaMca ke lie heDa mAsTara ko badanAma karAnA aura bhI Avazyaka ho gyaa| caMde kA sArA paisA heDa mAsTara ke pAsa hI thaa| unakA hisAba-kitAba itanA sApha thA ki usameM unheM badanAma karane kI koI guMjAiza hI nahIM thI / phira bhI seThajI ko bhar3akAne ke lie usane heDa mAsTara sAhaba kI pichalI badanAmI kA jikra kiyaa| seThajI bhI hoziyAra the / ataH unhoMne socA - calo, heDa mAsTara aura sarapaMca donoM kI hI parIkSA kara leM / isI udva ezya se unhoMne eka dina avasara dekhakara heDamAsTara sAhabakI jeba meM se hajAra rupaye nikAla lie| phira sarapaMca se kahA " ApakA anumAna ThIka nikalA / haiDamAsTara sAhaba ne haz2Ara rupaye mujhe die haiM, haz2Ara rupae khuda leMge aura ye haz2Ara rupae Apa lIjie / tIna haz2Ara rupayoM kI corI kI ghoSaNA karanI par3egI / calo, apane ko bhI isa daur3adhUpa kA kucha pArizramika mila jAegA / ' 47 sarapaMca ne apanI bAta kI puSTi karate hue kahA'maiMne Apase pahale hI kahA thA / khaira, ApakI bAta ko maiM kaise TAla sakatA hUM ?" yaha kahate hue usane rupae apanI jeba ke havAle kie / ghara lauTate samaya usake pAsa kAphI sAmAna ho gayA thA / gAMva meM pahu~cane para sarapaMca ko bar3A Azcarya huA, jaba heDa mAsTara sAhaba ne bIsa hajAra rupayoM ke caMde kI ghoSaNA kii| usane seThajI kI ora arthapUrNa dRSTi se dekhA to ve bole- -"abhI nATaka samApta thor3e ho gayA hai ? abhI to kaI dRzya sAmane AyeMge / cupacApa dekhate raho / " ghara Akara heDa mAsTara sAhaba ne rupae gine to eka haz2Ara rupae kama nikale / unakA sira Thanaka gayA / socane lage, aba badanAma hone meM koI kasara nahIM rahegI / pahale vAlI bAta bhI satya sAbita ho jAegI, para aba kyA kiyA jA sakatA thA ? paristhiti bar3I jaTila thI, para heDa mAsTara sAhaba ne dhairya nahIM khoyA / unhoMne sArI bAta apanI patnI se kahI / patnI ne usI samaya apanA hAra nikAlate hue kahA - "hAra bAda meM haiM ijjata pahale hai / ijjata rahegI to hAra ke binA bhI kAma cala jaaegaa| ijjata nahIM rahegI, to yaha bhI cubhane lagegA | ataH Apa ise becakara rupayoM kA pUrA hisAba seThajI ko de dIjie / "

Page #114
sArvajanika jIvana / 113 heDa mAsTara ko yaha acchA to nahIM lagA, para isake sivA aura koI vikalpa bhI to nahIM thA / ataH unhoMne socA-calo apanI ora se skUla ko haz2Ara rupae kA guptadAna hI shii| aura ve usI vakta hAra lekara seThajI ke pAsa aae| seThajI ne hAra dekhakara kahA--- "yaha kyA ?" heDa mAsTara sAhaba ne kahA- "mujhe isI samaya rupayoM kI AvazyakatA hai| Apa ucita dAma lagAkara yaha hAra kharIda liijie|" seThajI sArI bAta samajha to gae the, para phira bhI unhoMne heDa mAsTara sAhaba se sArI bAta kahalavAI / seThajI ne dekhA, haiDamAsTara sAhaba ke cehare para eka udAsI to AI, para unake zabdoM meM dRr3hatA thii| ve bAra-bAra kaha rahe the, "rupae cale gae para mujhe apanA vizvAsa nahIM gaMvAnA hai|" seThajI ne kahA--"to isameM Apako paise bhugatane kI kyA bAta hai, Akhira kAryakartA paramezvara to nahIM hai| rupae cale gae to corI kI bAta kahakara mAmalA samApta kara deNge|" para haiDamAsTara sAhaba karIba-karIba cIkhakara bole--- "nahIM, aisA nAma bhI mata lIjie / jo kucha ho gayA use bhUla jAie aura yaha hAra Apa kharIda liijie|" | __seThajI ne haiDa mAsTara sAhaba kA yaha tyAga dekhA to apane para lajjita hone lge| socane lage-."maiM paisevAlA hokara bhI paise ke lie rotA hU~ aura yaha vyakti kitanA ImAnadAra hai ki corI cale gae rupayoM ke badale bhI apanA hAra de rahA hai|' usI samaya seThajI ne sarapaMca ko bulAyA aura sArA rahasya prakaTa karate hue kahA - "heDa mAsTara sAhaba to Aga meM tapa kara khare sone kI taraha nikala ge| aba batAie, Apa sIdhe rupae dete haiM yA gAMva ko ikaTThA karanA par3egA ?" sarapaMca ke sAmane aura koI vikalpa nahIM thA; kyoMki bAta itanI spaSTa aura niyojita DhaMga se kI gaI thI ki Akhira sarapaMca ko ve haz2Ara rupaye ugalane par3e / seThajI ne use DAMTate hue Age aisA kAma nahIM karane kI pratijJA karavAI / dUsare dina mAre gAMva kI mITiMga bulAI gaI / seThajI ne apane daure kA vivaraNa dete hue batAyA ki heDa mAsTara sAhaba ne Apako bIsa hajAra rupae caMde kI bAta batAI thI, para maiM Apako sUcanA detA hUM ki aba vaha rakama

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114 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI ikkIsa hajAra rupae ho gaI hai / eka hajAra rupayA maiM heDa mAsTara sAhaba ke nAma apanI ora se de rahA hUM / yadi AvazyakatA huI to maiM caMde meM pIche nahIM rahUMgA / heDa mAsTara sAhaba se yahI AzA karatA hU~ ki ve hamAre gAMva kI bhalAI ke lie hamArA netRtva karate raheMge / O

Page #116
mA phaleSu kadAcana maiM laMde samaya se saMtoSa ko yaha samajhAne kA asaphala prayAsa kara rahA thA ki karma ko acche aura bure meM mata baaNtto| astitva kI byAkhyA kevala itanI hI ho sakatI hai ki vaha hai / isake atirikta usakI khUTI para bhale aura bure ke vastra TA~kanA kevala hamArI Aropita mAnyatAeM haiN| para saMtoSa ko merI bAta para vizvAsa nahIM ho rahA thaa| vaha aksara mujhe tarka diyA karatA thA ki acche bIja kA phala acchA hI hogA isameM kyA saMdeha hai ? maiM use kahatA-udAharaNoM meM satya kA pratibimba mata dekho| vaha kabhI sahI bhI nikala sakatA hai aura kabhI galata bhii| para saca bAta yaha thI ki maiM svayaM bhI apane tarka ke bala para apane ko usa para lAdane kI koziza kara rahA thaa| jisa tarka se maiM usako kATa rahA hU~ usI tarka se kyA maiM apane Apako nahIM kATa rahA hU~ yaha AbhAsa mujhe huA karatA thaa| isIlie kucha dinoM se maiMne use kucha bhI samajhAnA chor3a diyA thaa| maiM socane lagA thA ki satya kI vyAkhyA karane kI AvazyakatA nahIM hai / kabhI vaha apane Apa prakAzita ho jAtA hai / aura saca to yaha hai ki satya ke bAre meM nizcita dhAraNA banA lenA hI saMbhava nahIM hai| __lambe samaya ke bAda kala saMtoSa mere pAsa AyA aura bolA - tuma jo kahate the,baha saca nikalA / kAryako kisI nizcita pariNAma meM dekhanA merI bhUla thii| kriyA kI pariNati pratikriyA meM to hotI hai para yaha nahIM kahA jA sakatA ki vaha pariNati bhalI hI hogI yA burI hI / hama jisa acche pariNAma kI AzA se koI kAma karate haiM, vaha bahuta bAra bure pariNAma meM badala sakatA hai| isI prakAra kabhI-kabhI bure pariNAma meM se bhI bhalAI meM nikala sakatI

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116 / nae mandira : nae pujArI hai| asala meM acchA aura burA kucha nahIM hotaa| yaha kevala hamArA bhrama hai / maiMne usase pUchA-Aja acAnaka tumheM yaha samyakta kaise mila gayA ? roja to tuma mujhase isa bAta para bahasa kiyA karate the| usane kahA -- Aja prAtaHkAla maiM zoca-nivRtti ke lie jaMgala jA rahA thaa| rAta-bhara kI garmI ke bAda ThaMDI-ThaMDI havA cala rahI thii| itane meM sAr3he tIna hAtha kA 'eka kAlA bhujaMga merI dAyIM ora se nikalakara bAyIM ora ghAsa ke Dhera meM ghusa gyaa| eka kSaNa ke lie maiM staMbhita raha gyaa| mujhe lagA, jaise mere sAmane se sAkSAt mRtyu kA julUsa nikala gayA hai| mere kadama bar3e saMbhalasaMbhalakara par3a rahe the| eka kSaNa pahale maiM jisa unmuktatA se cala rahA thA, vaha aba saMdehoM se bhara gayI thii| aba mujhe hara jhAr3I se sA~pa kI sarasarAhaTa sunAI de rahI thI; valki mujhe laga rahA thA ki jaise AkAza se bhI sA~pa jhara rahe haiN| phira bhI maiM sA~pa ke calane se banI Ter3hI-mer3hI lakIra kI lAMgha kara Age bar3ha gyaa| yadyapi maiM tejI se Age jA rahA thA, para merA dhyAna barAbara pIche rahe ghAsa ke Dhera kI ora hI mur3a rahA thaa| thor3I dUra Age jAkara maiM zauca se nivRtta hokara lauTa AyA / aba bhI taraha-taraha kI AzaMkAeM mere mana meM umara rahI thiiN| itane meM maiM dekhatA hUM eka navayuvatI hAtha meM eka TokarI lekara bedhar3aka usI ghAsa kI DherI kI ora A rahI hai, jisameM vaha sA~pa chipakara baiThA thaa| acAnaka mere sAmane jaise bijalI kauMdha gyii| mujhe lagA ki basa abhI sA~pa nikalA aura isa yuvatI ko kaattaa| na jAne isakI A~khoM meM kitane sapane taira rahe hoNge| na jAne isane kyA-kyA yojanAeM banA rakhI hoMgI, para agale kSaNa vaha sArI tAza ke pattoM se bane mahala kI bhAMti Dhaha jaaeNgii| eka kSaNa ke lie mujhe yaha bhI lagA ki hamAre jIvana meM ajJAna kI bhI kitanI AvazyakatA hai| yadi hama hara kSaNa tamAma pariveza se paricita raheM to zAyada eka kSaNa ke lie bhI bhaya se mukta na ho skeN| na jAne mRtyu hama para kitane hAthoM se prahAra kara rahI hai| hama una saba prahAroM se jAnakAra nahIM hai / yadi jAnakAra hote to ta jAne apane cAroM ora hameM kitane sA~pa laharAte najara Ate / aura acAnaka mere mu~ha se karuNA kA srota faTa par3A - are jarA saMbhalanA / abhI-abhI eka sA~pa isa ghAsa kI DherI meM ghusA hai| usane saMdeha

Page #118
mA phaleSu kadAcana | 117 mizrita Azcarya se eka bAra merI ora dekhA aura phira ghAsa kI DherI kI ora dekhA / binA kisI prayatna ke use sopa ke reMgane se tatkAla banI Ter3hI -- mer3hI rekhA dikhAI de gayI / aba use vizvAsa ho gayA ki sAMpa abhI-abhI: Dhera ke andara ghusA hai / acchA hotA, merI bAta sunakara vaha lauTa jAtI yA DherI ke dUsare kinAre se ghAsa lekara calI jAtI, para honahAra kucha aura hI thI / yuvatI ke mana meM sAhasa mizrita kutUhala kI eka lahara uThI aura usane usI jagaha jevA ko ghAsa meM ghuser3A, jahA~ sAMpa chipA baiThA thaa| maiMne use bahuta manA kiyA ki aisA mata karo, sAMpa kisI kA dosta nahIM hotA / usakA to baccA bhI kharAba hotA hai / phira yaha to moTA-tAjA kAlA bhujaMga hai, para yuvatI ne merI bAta nahIM mAnI / vaha merI saMdehAsikta kAyaratA para musakarAI aura bolI kyA sAMpa mujhe kATane ke lie hI baiThA hai ? maiMne bahuta sAMpa khilAeM haiM / hama baniyA nahIM, kisAna haiN| hama aise khataroM se nahIM Darate / mujhe usake komala cehare ne phira dayArdra kiyA / aura maiM phira gir3agir3AyA- are ! jAne bhI do / kyoM jAnabUjhakara mauta ke muha meM hAtha DAlatI ho ? para vaha to mAnI hI nahIM / usane balapUrvaka jevA ko ghAsa kI DherI meM ghuser3A aura bar3I tAkata se Upara uThAyA / saMyoga aisA huA ki sA~pa jevA meM ulajha gyaa| jyoM hI yuvatI ne apane hAthoM ko AkAza meM uchAlA, sAMpa bhI ghAsa ke sAtha AkAza meM uchala gyaa| aba to vaha bahuta kruddha ho cukA thA / AkAza se vaha ThIka yuvatI ke pAsa hI girA / usase pahale ki yuvatI saMbhalatI kruddha sAMpa ne apanI lapalapAtI jihvA se use Dasa liyA / eka karuNa cItkAra ke sAtha yuvatI uchalakara nIce gira par3I / 1 itane meM rAha calate kucha aura loga bhI ikaTThe ho gae / sabane sthiti kA jAyajA liyaa| koI tunakakara bolA - isane jAna-bUjhakara kyoM kAla ke gAla meM hAtha DAlA ? koI bolA - honahAra hI aisI thI / kAla hI ise khIMcakara yahA~ lAyA thaa| koI bolA - bhagavAna kI aisI hI marajI thI, nahIM to bhalA yaha kyoM jAna-bUjhakara aisA khela khelatI ? koI bolA - yaha to sAMpa ne apanA pichalA baira liyA hai / isI prakAra kI aneka AvAjeM mere kAnauM se TakarAtI rhiiN| maiMne socA jo honA thA, vaha ho cukaa| aba

Page #119
118 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI to isake prANa bacAne kA koI upAya karanA caahie| sabhI logoM kI rAya lekara maiMne use eka vAhana para biThAyA aura use usake ghara chor3a AyA / ghara vAloM ne use bacAne ke aneka prayAsa kie| use ghI pilAyA, nIma ke patte khilAe, maMtravAdI ko bulAyA, viSa khIMcane vAle ojhA ko bulAyA rAmadeva jI ke dehare bhopoM kA nRtya karavAyA, para usakA viSa nahIM utarA / zAma ko maiM phira usake ghara gyaa| usake mu~ha se barAbara khUna nikalA jA rahA thA / dhIre-dhIre vaha nIlI par3atI jA rahI thI / usakA sundara ceharA DarAvanA bana cukA thA / parivArika loka burI taraha se ro-pITa rahe the| apane mAtA-pitA kI vaha ikalautI lar3akI thii| unhoMne use bar3e lAr3a* pyAra se pAlA-posA thaa| bar3e ullAsa se sAtha usakI zAdI kI thii| varSoM taka bar3I sAvadhAnI se pAlA-posA para vaha vRkSa mRtyu ke eka hI jhoMke se dhvasta ho gayA / usakA pati bhI nirupAya usakI ora TakaTakI lagAe dekha rahA thA / maiM socane lagA - yadi maiM use sAMpa kI bAta nahIM batAtA to kyA usakI mRtyu hotI ? zAyada nahIM / aura mujhe apanI hI anukampA para tarasa Ane lagA / mujhe lagA, jaise yaha pApa maiMne hI kiyA hai, para dUsare hI kSaNa maiMne socA - maiMne to use bacAne kA hI upAya kiyA thA, phira bhI aba maiM samajha gayA hUM ki hamArI kriyAeM kevala acchI pratikriyAoM se hI jur3I huI nahIM haiM, usake sAtha bahuta-sI burI pratikriyAeM bhI jur3I huI haiM / asala meM karma ko pariNAma nahIM, bhAvanA meM AMkanA cAhie /

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Ama aura prAMsa marDara ke eka kesa kA rAja khulavAne ke lie pulisa ne harabhajana ko itanI berahamI le pITA ki eka khUna kI khoja karate-karate dUsarA khUna ho gyaa| yadyapi janatA kA khayAla thA ki marDara kA asalI aparAdhI koI dUsarA hI thaa| para rAjanItika dabAva ke kAraNa asalI aparAdhI ko chipA diyA gayA tathA becAre niraparAdha harabhajana ko mauta ke ghATa utara jAnA par3A / pulisa ne isa kesa meM acche hAtha cikane kiye / para harabhajana kI patnI evaM choTe-choTe bacce itanI asahAyatA se ro rahe the ki pAsa-par3osa kI janatA kA dila dahala gyaa| dhIre-dhIre yaha Aha sAre gAMva meM phaila gaI aura janatA pulisa ke viruddha ubala pdd'ii| yadyapi pulisa ne apane-Apa ko bacAne ke lie kAphI surakSAtmaka kAryavAhiyo karalI thii| usane marane me 4 ghaNTe pahale DAkTara se bhI yaha likhavA liyA thA ki harabhajana kI hAlata normala (sAmAnya) hai| harabhajana se DaNDe ke bala para kaI sAde kAgajoM para hastAkSara karavA lie the, jina para kucha bhI likhakara apane pakSa ko begunAha ThaharAyA jA sake; para antima nirNaya ke samaya meM, jabaki pulisa ne harabhajana ko aspatAla meM dAkhila kara diyA thA, harabhajana ko hoza A gayA thA aura usane rote-rote apanI Apa-bItI sambandhiyoM ko sunA dI thii| usane batAyA ki vaha bilakula begunAha hai aura pulisa ne use itanI burI taraha pITA hai ki usakA ro-roAM dukha rahA hai aura aba usakA bacanA muzkila hai| yadyapi usake saMbaMdhiyoM ko bhI pahale yaha zaMkA thI ki zAyada harabhajana hI asalI hatyArA hai, para aba mRtyu ke kinAre khar3e hokara harabhajana ne jo kucha kahA, usase sArI pichalI AzaMkAyeM dhula

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120 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI gaI / ataH sambandhiyoM kA khUna bhI khaula uThA / Upara se pulisa jo ghoMsa dikhA rahI thI, usase rahA-sahA dhairya bhI TUTa gayA / isIlie java unheM harabhajana kI lAza supurda kI, to unhoMne use lene ke inkAra kara diyA / unhoMne Agraha kiyA ki pahale hama isakA niSpakSa muAyanA karAyeMge, phira ise uThAyeMge / isake lie pradeza kI rAjadhAnI se samparka kiyA gayA vahAM se kisI meDikala borDa ke pahuMcane meM kAphI samaya kI aavshykt| thI / ataH isa intajAra meM harabhajana kA dAha saMskAra bhI nahIM ho sakA / idhara kruddha janatA kI bhIr3a apanA dhairya kho cukI thii| pahale to janatA thAne para gaI, para patA lagA ki harabhajana ko pITane vAlA thAnedAra to kala se hI gAyaba ho gayA hai / taba vaha aspatAla kI ora daudd'ii| vahAM usane galata riporTa likhane vAle DAkTara se badalA lene kI ThAnI, para DAkTara bhI na jAne kahAM gAyaba ho gyaa| alabattA aspatAla ke pAsa hI DAkTara kA makAna khAlI par3A thA / janatA ne dila kholakara usa para apanA gussA utArA, makAna ke sAre kAMca tor3a diye, para sAMpa nikala jAne ke bAda lakIra pITane se kyA phAyadA ? aba to janatA aspatAla para Akara jama gaI / jisa kisI ne yaha sunA, vaha daur3A-daur3A aspatAla jA pahu~cA / koI 20-25 hajAra AdamI ekatra ho gaye the / aspatAla meM paira rakhane taka ke lie bhI jagaha nahIM thI / saba loga ghaTanA kI vAstavikatA ko jAnanA cAhate the, para jaisA ki svAbhAvika hai, bhIr3a meM asalI bAta para vicAra honA kaThina hai / ataH vahAM kA vAtAvaraNa itanA garma ho gayA ki janatA bekAbU ho gii| vaha nAre lagAne lgii| khUna kA badalA khUna se leMge / 'thAnedAra murdAbAda ! 'DAkTara murdAbAda !' aura gandI gandI gAliyoM se sArA vAtAvaraNa kulaSita ho gyaa| usane DAkTara ke oNphisa meM bhI dekhA, para vahAM DAkTara kahAM se milatA ? saMyoga se vahAM esa0 DI0 AI baiThA huA thaa| kucha ubale hue naujavAna itane betAba ho gae ki DAkTara ko nahIM pAkara unhoMne DAkTara kI jagaha esa0 DI0 AI0 kI hI marammata kara dI / usa becAre ne kAphI sahanazIlatA dikhaaii| mAra khAkara bhI vaha janatA se mAphI mAMgatA rahA janatA para usakA thor3A asara bhI huA / vaha esa0 DI0 AI0 kI bAta sunanA cAhatI thI ki itane meM

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Aga aura AMsU / 121 L pulisa ke javAnoM kA khUna khaula uThA aura unhoMne binAhI bar3e AphisaroM kI ijAjata ke lAThI cArja kara diyaa| bhIr3a ko bikherane ke lie azru gaisa bhI chor3I / lAThiyoM kI mAra khAkara loga ekabAra to idhara-udhara bhAge para aba unhoMne aspatAla kI bAunDarI ke bAhara khar3e hokara patthara pheMkane zurU kara diye / pulisa ke raMgarUTa bhI ubale hue to the hI, ataH dAMta bhIMcakara gAliyAM nikAlane lage / phira jaba janatA kI ora se pattharoM kI bauchAra asahya ho gaI to pulisa ne phAyara zurU kara diyA / isa sAre kesa meM saradAra milakhA siMha ko bahuta hI tAva A rahA thA / vaha krodha se pAgala ho rahA thA / usane apane sAthI pulisa vAloM ko to ukasAyA hI para esa0 DI0 AI0 ko bhI burA-bhalA kaha DAlA / kahane lagA - Apa yahAM andara kamare meM baiThe hameM bAhara maidAna meM maravA rahe haiM / Apa dekhate nahIM, aspatAla ke cAroM ora ke kAMca phUTa gaye haiM / aba bhI sanasanAte hue patthara A rahe haiM aura Apa phAyara kA Adeza nahIM dete haiM / basa, hama abhI logoM se nipaTa lete haiM / jaba logoM ko khUna kA raMga dIkha jAyegA, to apane zrApa duma dabA kara bhAga jAyeMge / hama yadi Darate rahe to Aja hamArI khaira nahIM hai / ApakI kAyaratA se eka-eka pulisa Aja jamIna nApa legA / hajAroM AdamiyoM ke sAmane pulisa ke 100 javAnoM kI kyA bisAta hai / ata: Apako phAyara karane kA Adeza denA par3egA / vivaza hokara esa0 DI0 AI0 ko phAyara ke Adeza patra para apane hastAkSara karane par3e / milakhA siMha to Aja jaise rAkSasa hI ho gayA thA / acAnaka usakI chAtI se eka bar3A-sA patthara Akara TakarAyA / aba to vaha Ape se bAhara ho gayA aura binA AkAza meM phAyara kiye usane apane rivAlvara ko janatA kI ora tAna diyA / usake muMha se bar3e asabhya zabda nikala rahe the / usakA sArA zarIra kAMpa rahA thA / ucaka ucaka kara vaha phAyara karatA jA rahA thA / janatA ke gusse kA koI pAra nahIM thA / samudra kI taraha apAra janatA pulisa ke sAtha pattharabAjI meM vyasta thI / kabhI pulisa janatA ke pIche daur3atI thI to kabhI janatA pulisa ke pIche / janatA bhI nimnatama zabdoM kA prayoga kara rahI thI / eka ora janatA ke roSa se

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122 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI pulisa ko tAva AtA thA to dUsarI ora janatA goliyoM kI bauchAra se behoza ho rahI thI / kAphI AdamI mara cuke the| pulisa ke javAnoM ko bhI kAphI coTeM AyIM thI, para abhI gaNanA kI fursata kisako thI ? kabhI golI khAlI calI jAtI thI, to kabhI koI ekAdha vyakti jamIna para gira par3atA thA / isa rassAkasI meM jaba janatA pIche bhAgatI to pulisa marI huI lAza ko isa taraha ghasITate hue apane kabje meM kara letI thI mAno vaha koI kutte kI lAza ho ? isase janatA phira ubalatI, aura pulisa phira lAThI calAtI, patthara phaikatI tathA kabhI-kabhI golI calAtI thI / golI kI bAta sAre gAMva meM phailanI svAbhAvika thI / isalie zahara ke sabhI skUloM kI chuTTI kara dI gii| gAMdhI sadana ke lar3akoM kI bhI chuTTI ho gaI thI / sabhI lar3ake bhaya aura utsukatA se apane-apane gharoM ko lauTa rahe the / saMyoga se gAMdhI sadana ke rAste meM hI aspatAla par3atA thA / ataH lar3ake bhI dabe pAMva aspatAla kI ora dRSTi TikAye dhIre-dhIre sarakate jA rahe the / itane meM kucha kruddha naujavAna bAhara khar3I pulisa kI gAr3I ke pAsa pahu~ca gaye / ve gAr3I ko Aga lagAne kA prayAsa kara hI rahe the ki itane meM pulisa kA dhyAna unakI ora calA gayA / milakhAsiMha ne Ava dekhA na tAva gAr3I kI ora golI dAga dI / UdhamI lar3ake to golI kA rukha dekhakara gAr3I kI Ar3a meM chipa gae, para vaha gAMdhI sadana se lauTate 10 varSa ke mohandri siMha ke sIne meM jA lgii| eka karuNa Aha ke sAtha mohindrasiMha Dhera ho gayA / aura lar3ake bhAga gaye mohindrasiMha vahIM par3A raha gayA / pulisa DaNDe lekara tatkAla mohindrasiMha ko uThAne daudd'ii| vaha use usI prakAra ghasITate hue le jA rahI thI, jaise kisI mare hue jAnavara ko lAyA jA rahA ho / dUra se milakhA siMha ne dekhA ki pulisa ke hAthoM meM koI saradAra kA baccA hai / eka bAra usakA hRdaya thor3A kAMpA aura bandUka ko kasa kara pakar3e hue usake hAtha jarA DhIle ho gaye / vaha AMkheM phAr3akara saradAra ke bacce kI lAza dekhane lagA / yadyapi kucha dera to use patA nahIM calA, para jyoMhI lAza najadIka AI usane dekhA saradAra ke bacce ne vahI kapar3e pahana rakhe haiM jo usakA beTA mohindra pahanA

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Aga aura AMsU / 123 karatA hai / thor3A aura najadIka Ane para usane spaSTataH pahacAna liyA ki vaha usakA beTA mohindra hI hai| aba to eka kSaNa meM usakA krodha ThaMDA par3a gayA / na jAne kaba usake hAtha se baMdUka chUTa kara gira par3I aura na jAne kaba vaha Akara mohindra siMha se lipaTa kara dhAr3e mAra kara rone lagA / sArA dRzya sinemA paTa kI taraha badala gayA / eka kSaNa pahale jahAM raNa-sA chir3A huA thA, dUsare kSaNa vAtAvaraNa jaise bilkula gamagIna ho gyaa| loga stabdha hokara patthara pheMkanA bhUla gaye aura pulisa phAyara karanA tathA DaNDA calAnA | milakhA siMha to mohindrasiMha se lipaTakara aceta ho - gayA thaa| pulisa vAloM ne donoM ko uThAkara aspatAla meM phuNcaayaa| havA karane tathA ThaNDe pAnI chir3akane se milakhA siMha kI mUrchA jarA TUTI to usane sabase pahale yahI pUchA -- bAhara phAyara to banda ho gaI hai nA ? jaba usake sAthiyoM ne batAyA ki hAM, phAyara to banda ho gaI hai| ekadama milakhA siMha ko kucha yAda AyA aura aspatAla ke daravAje kI ora daudd'aa| bAhara Akara vaha hAtha jor3akara nizcala bhAva se khar3A hokara janatA se kahane lagA -- bhAiyoM ! maiMne Apake nirdoSa putroM ko mArA hai, mujhe usakA badalA mila cukA hai| yahAM merA lar3akA bhI golI kA zikAra ho gayA hai / vaise to apanI karanI kA phala mila gayA hai, para abhI taka kucha aura bhI bAkI hai / Apako bhI yaha adhikAra hai ki apane lar3akoM kI hatyA ke badale meM mujhe mAreM / maiM Apake sAmane taiyAra khar3A hU~ / janatA jo bhI daNDa degI, mujhe maMz2Ura hai / mere prANa Apake kadamoM meM hAjira haiM / Apa mujha hatyAre para vAra kara khatma kara dIjiye / mujha jaise putra hatyAre ko jIne kA adhikAra nahIM hai / aba maiM yoM hI tar3apa-tar3apa kara marUMgA, isase to yahI acchA hai ki Apa mujhe mAra deM 1 aba taka janatA kA krodha bhI zAnta ho gayA thaa| jina AMkhoM meM thor3I dera pahale cinagAriyAM uchala rahI thIM, unameM aba AMsU bahane lage /

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eka patthara-eka AdamI jaba bhI koI AdamI mere sAmane hIre kI aMgUThI pahana kara pAtA hai to anAyAsa merA mana usameM ulajha jAtA hai / yadyapi maiM koI jauharI nahIM hUM aura na hI mujhe javAharAta saMgraha karane kA zauka hai, para jaba se mere mitra prabhAta ne eka ghaTanA sunAI taba se na jAne mere avacetana mana meM kyoM aise saMskAra jama gaye haiM ki hIre kI aMgUThI ko dekhakara maiM socane lagatA hU~ ki isakI kImata samajhane vAle loga to phira bhI mila jAyeMge, para jIvana ke hIre kI kImata samajhane vAle loga kitaneka mileMge ? bAta yaha huI ki prabhAta eka dina eka bar3e sAmAjika bhoja meM parosane ke lie gayA huA thaa| saiMkar3oM loga katAra meM baiThakara bhojana kara rahe the / vAtAvaraNa atyanta kolAhalamaya thaa| koI sAga mAMga rahA thA to koI pUr3I, koI namakIna mAMga rahA thA to koI mitthaaii| kahIM haMsI ke phavvAre chUTa rahe the to kahIM vyaMgya bANoM kI varSA ho rahI thii| kahIM mIThI manuhAreM ho rahI thIM to kahIM baccoM kI kilkaariyaaN| isI gahamAgahamI meM prabhAta saMbhala-saMbhala kara sabako miThAI parosatA huA jA rahA thaa| hAlAMki aksara aise maukoM para loga apane paricitoM kA hI vizeSa khayAla rakhate haiN| unheM acchI aura zreSTha cIja parosane meM dilacaspI lete haiM, para prabhAta ke mana meM aisI koI granthi nahIM thii| vaha samAna bhAva se sabako yatheccha miThAI parosatA huA jA rahA thaa| ___ acAnaka eka bacce kI thAlI meM miThAI parosate-parosate prabhAta cauMka pdd'aa| yadyapi agalI paMkti ke loga usale miThAI mAMga rahe the, para prabhAta to jaise vahIM jama gyaa| use Age-pIche kA koI khayAya nahIM rahA aura

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eka patthara eka AdamI | 125 vaha lagAtAra kabhI usa bacce ke hAtha kI aMgUThI dekhatA to kabhI usake cehare ko, kabhI usake kapar3oM ko dekhatA to kabhI usake Asa-pAsa baiThe logoM ko / aMgaThI meM eka hIrA jar3A huA thA,use dekhate hI prabhAta kI yaha hAlata ho gaI thii| yadyapi hIre ke Asa-pAsa thor3A maila jama gayA thA, para phira bhI prabhAta kI pArakhI AMkhoM ko yaha samajhate dera nahIM lagI ki yaha eka kImatI hIrA hai| bacce ke raMgaDhaMga ko dekhakara to lagatA thA ki zAyada yaha hIrA nakalI hai, para usakI camaka hI usake asalI hone kI ghoSaNA kara rahI thii| isI udher3a-buna meM prabhAta miThAI parosatA huA Age bar3ha gayA, para usakA mana to hIre meM hI aTakA huA thaa| isIlie kucha Age jAkara usane kucha anya logoM se usa bacce ke bAre meM pUcha-tAcha kii| patA calA ki be tIna-cAra bhAI haiM aura resakorsa ke pAsa apanI choTI-sI dukAna karate haiN| prabhAta ko phira saMzaya huaa| vaha socane lagA ki yA to merA javAharAta kA jJAna galata hai yA phira yaha hIrA isa bacce ke pAsa galatI se A gayA / apane Apako niHsaMzaya karane ke lie vaha phira bacce ke pAsa aayaa| kucha kSaNa taka usane phira gaura se usa hIre ko dekhA / Akhira usane nizcaya kara liyA ki yaha hIrA kImatI hai, baccA hI isakI kImata se anajAna hai| prabhAta ne usake sAtha baiThe hue eka yuvaka se pUchA-yaha tumhArA kyA lagatA hai ? yuvaka ne kahA-yaha merA bhAI hai / prabhAta ne jarA sAvadhAnI ke lahaje meM kahA- yaha ApakA bhAI hai to Apako khayAla rakhanA caahie| baccoM ko aise kImatI gahane nahIM pahanAne caahie| itanA sunate hI vaha yuvaka bidaka gyaa| vaha jora se to nahIM bola sakA para andara hI andara phusaphusAne lagA - ye amIra AdamI bhI bar3e ajIba hote haiM / inako kyA par3I hai ki hamAre bIca meM TA~ga ar3Ate / aMgUThI pahanI hai to hamane apano ghara kI pahanI hai, kisI kI curAkara nahIM pahanI hai| para vAstava meM ye bar3e loga hameM phaTI A~kha se bhI nahIM dekhanA cAhate / svayaM to lAkhoM rupayoM ke gahane pahanakara Ate haiM, para dUsarA yadi koI mAmUlI-sA gahanA bhI pahana letA hai to upadeza jhAr3ane lagate haiN| apane para ye koI pratibandha nahIM lagAte. para dUsaroM kI jarA-sI bhI zauka inako nahIM suhaatii| vAstava meM

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126 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI ina bar3e logoM ko kisI kA Upara uThanA suhAtA hI nhiiN| ye socate haiM ki koI hamase Upara nahIM uTha jAya / khuda to zAdiyoM meM bar3e-bar3e bhoja karate haiM, dUsarA choTA-sA bhoja kara letA hai to usakI ora aMgalI uThAte haiM, samAja meM badanAma kara dete haiM / khuda to bar3A-bar3A daheja dete haiM, dUsarA yadi aisA kara letA hai to usa para TIkA-TippaNI karane lagate haiN| sacamuca ye bar3e khataranAka hote haiN| - prabhAta usakI phusaphusAhaTa ko samajha gayA, para vaha jarA bhI vicalita nahIM huaa| hAlAMki paristhiti aisI thI ki vaha unase virata ho sakatA thA / vaha to unakI bhalAI ke lie hI aisA kaha rahA thA, ve loga ulTA use hI galata samajhane lge| aise hI avasaroM para AdamI kI pahacAna hotI hai| prabhAta ne socA- upekSA se jo khinna nahIM ho jAya aura apekSA se phUlakara kuppA na ho jAye vahI to saccA insAna hai| usane apane hRdaya ko TaTolA / usake mana meM kahIM koI pApa nahIM thA / vaha to ekAnta rUpa se unakI bhalAI ke lie hI unase Agraha kara rahA thA, para usakI davA kA ulTA asara ho rahA thaa| vaha unako unake bhAgya para chor3a sakatA thA / jaba rogI davA lenA hI nahIM cAhe to DAkTara vicArA kyA kare ? jaba ve prabhAta kI bAta mAnanA hI nahIM cAhate to vaha kyoM unase apanA sira TakarAye / lekina nahIM, prabhAta itanI-sI AMca para pighalane vAlA padArtha nahIM thaa| vaha samAja ke hara vyakti ko apanA hI sambandhI mAna rahA thaa| use Dara thA ki kahIM ye loga isa kImatI hIre ko yoM hI na gaMvA de| isIlie usane kucha aura pUchatAcha kii| use patA lagA ki unakA eka bar3A bhAI yahAM aura hai / vaha usI ke pAsa gayA aura bolA-bhAI sAhaba ! Apako apane choTe bhAI ko itane kImatI gahane nahIM pahanAne caahie| usane kahA-para hamAre pAsa to koI kImatI gahanA nahIM hai / prabhAta ne aMgUThI kI ora saMketa kara kahA ki yaha kitane rupayoM kI hai ! bar3A bhAI bolA--yaha to koI bahuta kImatI nahIM hai| eka AdamI sATha. sattara rupayoM meM hamAre pAsa giravI rakha gayA thaa| Aja do varSa ho gae, vaha lauTa kara hI nahIM AyA / ghara para par3I thI, choTA bhAI use pahana aayaa|

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eka patthara- eka Adamo / 127 prabhAta ne kahA .. jise tuma mAmUlI aMgUThI samajha rahe ho vaha vAstava meM bahuta kImatI hai / yaha to saMyoga kI bAta hai ki tumheM yaha sATha-sattara meM mila gaI, para isakI kImata tIsa-cAlIsa hajAra se kama nahIM hogii| yaha sunate hI bar3A bhAI to vicArA hakkA-bakkA sA raha gayA / vaha kahane lagA - Apako hama acche majAka karane vAle mila ge| tIsa-cAlIsa hajAra rupaye yoM koI kacare meM par3e haiM, jo hamane uThA lie? hamane kyA hamAre bApa-dAdA ne bhI kabhI tIsa-cAlIsa hajAra rupaye nahIM dekhe haiM / Apa hamArI garIbI kA makhaula na kreN| prabhAta ne jora dete hue kahA- mujhe tuma logoM se majAka karane kA zauka nahIM hai / mujhe to javAharAta kI parIkSA karane kA zauka hai, isalie maiM tumase kaha rahA huuN| ho sakatA hai, maiM nayA-nayA AdamI hU~, isalie merI parIkSA meM kucha pharka par3a jAye / acchA ho, hama bAjAra meM isakI kImata karavA leN| usI samaya vaha bar3e bhAI ko lekara jauharI-bAjAra meM gayA / kucha logoM ko lagA ki majAka gaharI hotI calI jA rahI hai| kucha logoM ko lagA ki prabhAta jarUra isameM apanA kamIzana khAyegA, para prabhAta ne kisI kI paravAha nahIM kii| usane socA--- yadi maiM sAtha nahIM jAUMgA, to zAyada jauharI loga inheM Thaga leNge| ho sakatA hai, koI kisI prakAra kA ilajAma lagAkara inako phaMsA bhI de / isIlie prabhAta unake sAtha ho liyaa| bAjAra meM eka prasiddha jauharI ko vaha hIrA dikhAte hue prabhAta bolAbhAI sAhaba ! isakI kImata kitanI ho sakatI hai| jauharI ne hIre ko aMgaThI se khola kara tolA to vaha chaha keraTa kA niklaa| hIrA asalI aura bedAga thaa| para javAharAta kA dhandhA hI aisA hai ki TrAI kie binA AdamI ThagA jAtA hai| isalie vaha phira eka dUsare nAmI jauharI ke pAsa gyaa| usane usakI kImata pAMca hajAra rupaye ke reTa btaaii| prabhAta ne socA eka sAtha do hajAra rupaye kereTa bhAva bar3ha jAtA hai to thor3I aura TrAI karanI caahie| vaha phira eka tIsare aura atyanta vizvasta jauharI ke pAsa aayaa| usane bhI usakI kImata pAMca-sAr3he-pAMca hajAra rupaye kereTa btaaii|

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128 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI prabhAta ne bar3e bhAI ko samajhAyA ki ho sakatA hai, thor3e dina roka kara rakhA jAya to isakI kImata aura bhI bar3ha jAya, para sAmAnya logoM ke lie aisI kImatI cIjoM kA roka kara rakhanA upayukta nahIM hai| bar3e bhAI ne kahA-hameM kisalie roka kara rakhanA hai / yadi hameM paisA mile to hama apanA dhandhA bar3hAyeMge / hameM hIre kA jarA bhI zoka nahIM hai| Apa to jaldI se jaldI hamAre paise khule krvaao| prabhAta ne Akhira molabhAva karate-karate chaha hajAra rupaye kereTa ke bhAva se vaha hIrA bikavA diyaa| kharIdadAra ne eka hajAra rupayA kama kiyaa| ata: bar3A bhAI paiMtIsa hajAra rupayoM ke noTa lekara dukAna se nIce utarA / usane prabhAta ko gale lagA liyaa| use hajAra-pandraha sau rupaye dene cAhe, para prabhAta ne usase eka paise kI dalAlI lenA asvIkAra kara diyaa| hAlAMki bar3A bhAI isa sAre ghaTanA kAMDa meM sAtha thA, para use vizvAsa nahIM ho rahA thA ki kyA sacamuca aisA ho sakatA hai| use to laga rahA thA, jaise vaha svapna dekha rahA hai| usake paira jamIna para nahIM Tika pA rahe the| prabhAta kI AMkhoM meM AMsU A ge| nizcaya hI ye AMsU vyApArika dakSatA ke nahIM the, apitu apane eka bandhu kI niSkAma sevA kI AMkhoM se bahakara Aye the| ho sakatA hai prabhAta ne apane dhandhe meM lAkhoM rupaye kamAye hoMge, para jitanA Ananda vaha isa prasaMga meM anubhava kara sakA utanA kabhI nahIM kara skaa| balki jaba-jaba vaha isa prasaMga ko yAda karatA hai to use lagatA hai jaise usane bhI apane hAthoM se mAnavatA kI dIvAra meM eka patthara rakhA hai|

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tAbUta seThadhanIrAma kA pIr3hiyoM se byAjakA dhaMdhA thaa| ve hamezA socA karate the, 'merA dhaMdhA kitanA acchA hai ki mujhe kucha parizrama nahIM karanA par3atA / loga apane-Apa mere pAsa Ate haiM, paisA le jAte haiM aura byAja de jAte haiM / hA~ kabhI-kabhI koI-koI AdamI galata bhI nikala jAtA hai / vaha paise lauTane meM AnA-kAnI karatA hai, para seThajI ko isa bAta para garva hai ki Aja taka koI unake paise nahIM pacA sakA / yadi kisI ke pAsa paisA nahIM hotA hai to ve sonA-cAMdI, jamIna jAyadAda, gAya-bhaiMsa aura yahAM taka ki bhAMr3e bartana aura kapar3e-latte taka lekara bhI apanA paisA cukatA kara lete the / yadyapi unake vyAja kA dara sabase U~cA rahatA thA, para phira bhI jarUrata maMda ko jhaka mArakara unake sAmane nAka ragar3anA par3atA thA / eka bAra unakA kAma nikala jAtA to ve samajhate ki seThajI bar3e dayAlu haiM, para asala meM jo AdamI seTha jI ke jAla meM phaMsa gayA vaha vApisa kabhI nahIM nikala sakA / vaha kyA usakI pIr3hiyAM bhI seTha jI ke jAla meM chaTapaTAkara mara jAtI haiN| seThajI isameM hI apanI kuzalatA samajhate / unakI apanI samajha se byAja kA dhaMdhA bilkula ahiMsaka hai, kyoMki usameM kisI bhI jIva kI hiMsA nahIM hotI / para, apratyakSa rUpa se khUna pI-pIkara ve jitane moTe hote jAte the, isakA unheM koI aMdAja nahIM thA / yadyapi imarjeMsI ke samaya jaba thor3e dinoM ke lie byAja kA dhaMdhA banda ho gayA tathA sarakAra garIba logoM ko unakI bandhakeM muphta meM dilabAne lagI thI to seThajI ko thor3A asamaMjasa jarUra huA thA / kucha badamAza loga apanI bandhaka lene ke lie usake pAsa Aye bhI the / kucha beImAna AdamI jhUThe bhI Aye the, para

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130 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI seThajI ne pulisa se milakara sabako ThikAne lagA diyA / duniyAM ko dikhAne ke lie unhoMne vekAma kI kucha bandhake vApasa bhI kI thI aura ava, jabaki imarjesI uTha gaI to seThajI kA dhaMdhA dina duganA rAta caugunA ho gyaa| ve akasara kahate ki hara dhaMdhA dina meM calatA hai, para merA dhaMdhA dinarAta calatA hai| sarakAra jitane kAnana banAtI , seThajI usase pahale rAstA khoja lete| sAre gAMva meM unakI akla kI dhAka thii| loga luTa-piTa kara bhI seThajI ko apanA hita-rakSaka mAnate / unase karja lete so to lete hI para usakA ahasAna bhI mAnate / mauMke ve mauke unakA choTA-moTA kAma bhI kara dete aura unakI hAjirI bhI bajAte rhte|| isase koI saMdeha nahIM ki Upara se seThajI kA kAma bar3I saphAI se calatA thA, para binA parizrama kI kamAI ne unako itanA nirdaya banA diyA thA ki ve AdamI kA khuna kyA haDDiyAM taka nahIM chor3ate / unakI isa nirdayatA kA aisA eka hI zikAra thA hIrA suthAra / usane kaI varSoM pahale apane bApa ke mRtyu-bhoja ke lie seThajI se paise lie the| itane varSoM kA byAja cukAte-cukAte vaha duganA paisA jamA karA cukA, para phira bhI mUladhana abhI taka jyoM kA-tyoM thaa| vaha bicArA mehanata karatA / zarIra para kapar3A bhI nahIM pahanatA / apane baccoM taka ko kabhI capar3I roTI nahI khilAtA, para seThajI kA peTa bharatA jA rahA thaa| eka dina acAnaka seThajI hIrA ke ghara kI ora se nikale / hIrA usa samaya eka acchI bar3I sI peTI banA rahA thaa| use dekhate hI seThajI ke muMha meM pAnI bhara aayaa| unakI giddha AMkhe usa peTI para par3a gaI aura usI kSaNa unhoMne apane bAja jaise nukIlI paMje usameM ar3A die / unhoMne atyanta madhura svara meM hIrA se kahA- vAha bhAI ! maiM tumhArI kalA kA lohA mAnatA huuN| kyA cIja banAI hai ! isakA kitanA kharca A gayA hogA ? hIrA ne kahA-mAlika ! kharca to Aja kala AtA hI hai ! hara cIja maha~gI hai| lakar3I bhI mahaMgI hai, kIle aura pAtiyAM bhI mahaMgI hai| seThajI-yaha to bilkula ThIka hai bhAI ! Aja hara cIja ke dAma AsamAna ko cha rahe haiN| asala meM hamArI sarakAra hI kharAba hai| isase to rAjemahArAje acche the, jo saba loga ArAma se jIte the| Ajakala beImAnI

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tAbUta / 131 to itanI bar3ha gaI hai ki pUcho mt| hara AdamI harAma kA khAnA cAhatA hai / sarakAra kA choTe se choTA naukara bhI muMha bAye khar3A hai / usa kI bheMTapUjA na ho to gAr3I sTezana se bhI Age na cale / aba dekho - kahate haiM, sarakAra garIboM ko lona detI hai, para kyA apanA sira lona detI hai ! bajaTa meM jitanI rakama lona meM rakhI jAtI hai, usameM se AdhI to netAoM meM bAMTa jAtI hai / phira jo thor3I-bahuta bacatI hai - use oNphisara khA jAte haiM / aura jo thor3I bahuta bacatI hai vaha jAtivAda, svArthavAda yA bhAIbhatIjevAda meM baMTa jAtI hai / tumako patA hai, rAmadhana ne khetI ke lie sarakAra se lona liyA thA, para pAnI pUrA nahIM girA / phasala hI paidA nahIM huI to vaha lona kahAM se cukAtA ? para sarakAra yaha saba kucha nahIM dekhatI / usane to becAre kA kheta hI nilAma karavA diyA hai| udhAra to hama bhI dete haiM, para aisA to nahIM krte| pahale to sarakAra ke kAnUna kAyade itane pecIde haiM ki bicArA garIba unheM samajha hI nahIM pAtA / yadi vakIloM yA sarakArI aijeMTo ke mAdhyama se samajhatA hai, to usakI yaha gati hotI hai / hama logoM ke pAsa koI kAnUna kAyadA nahIM hai| jarUratamaMda AdhI rAta ko AtA hai aura paise lekara calA jAtA hai / hama kabhI use nirAza nahIM karate | thor3A-bahuta byAja le lete haiM, to sarakArI gurge kahate haiM ki baniyA hameM cUsatA hai para saccAI yaha hai ki hama garIba ko nahIM cUsate, yaha sarakAra hI sabako cUsa rahI hai / hIrA - Apa ThIka kahate haiM seThajI ! sarakAra to Ajakala bhraSTAcAra se bharI par3I hai / seThajI -- aba tuma hI dekho / tumako kitane varSa ho gaye hamase rupayA lie | tumhAre bApa ke mRtyu bhoja ke samaya lie the / merA khyAla hai ki use tIsa varSa to ho hI gae hoNge| tuma rAta ko Aye the / maiMne tumheM kahIM cakkara lagavAye ? kevala tumhAre aMgUThe ke nizAna ke bharose para rakama nikAlakara de dI / kyA sarakAra aisA kara sakatI hai ? hIrA - nahIM mAlika ! bAta karate karate hI seThajI ne apanA asalI tIra chor3a diyA bole--para bhAI ! tumhArA isa varSa kA byAja nahIM AyA hai / kama

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132 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI se kama byAja to bhara denA caahie| yaha kahate kahate seThajI ne peTI para hAtha pheranA zurU kara diyaa| hIrA-mAlika paisA to mere pAsa nahIM hai| yadi Apako pasaMda ho to yaha - peMTI hI le jaao| seTha--yaha to ThIka hai, para isameM hama tumhArI lAgata ke hI paise deNge| vaise tumako lagatA hI kyA hai ? kATha ke Tukar3e to idhara-udhara bacate haiM ve hI jor3a lete ho| mehanata ke paisA hama deMge nhiiN| jo kIla-kA~To Adi ke paise lagate hoM vaha batA denA aura kala-parasoM jaba bhI phursata ho yaha peTI ghara pahuMcA denaa| seThajI ne yaha saba itanI saphAI aura Atma-vizvAza se kahA ki hIrA vicArA kucha nahIM bola sakA / aksara manuSya kA ajJAna hI usameM hIna bhAva bharatA haiM aura vaha binA matalaba dUsaroM kA bojha apane sira para DhotA rahatA hai| seThajI ke cale jAne ke bAda hIrA ke beToM ne thor3A pratirodha kiyA ki hama yoM kaur3I ke mUlya apanI gAr3hI kamAI nahIM de sakate, para hIrA ne unakI eka nahIM sunii| vaha kahane lagA--tuma isa bAta ko nahIM jAna sakate ki seThajI ne saMkaTa ke kSaNoM meM merA kitanA upakAra kiyA thaa| maiM isa bAta ko janma bhara nahIM bhUla sakatA / inhoMne mere bApa ke mRtyu-bhoja ke lie mujhe paise diye the| isalie mere jIte jI to nibhA lene do| mere mara jAne ke bAda tuma jo cAho krnaa| beToM ne kahA-kAkA ! para Apa to hamArA bhI peTa kATate haiN| hIrA ne Aveza meM uttara diyA--maiM tumhArA peTa kahAM kATatA hU~ ? abhI taka to mere hAtha-pA~va calate haiM ataH maiM jo cAhaM kruugaa| jisa dina tumhAre Tukar3e kA muMhatAja ho jAU~ usa dina tuma apanI manamAnI karanA / maiMne tumheM pAla-posa kara bar3A kiyA hai| abataka to tumhAre paMkha bhI pUre nahIM Aye haiM, usase pahale hI, majha se jabAna lar3Ane lage ho, yaha acchA nhiiN| apane bApa ke Age bacce adhika virodha nahIM kara sake / antataH hIrA vaha peTI seThajI ke ghara pahaMcA kara A gyaa| ghara meM peTI AI to seThAnI ne kahA--yaha kyA tAbUta-sA uThA lAye

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tAbUta / 133 hI ? Age hI ghara meM sAmAna adhika hai aura sthAna kama / hameM yaha peTI nahIM cAhie / seThajI ne kahA- tumheM jarUrata nahIM hai to maukA Ane para beca deMge / yo byAja ke paise nahIM Ate the, peTI ke bahAne paise bhI A gae aura aba peTI ke saude meM bhI thor3A-bahuta aura kamA leMge / sthAna kI kamI ke kAraNa peTI ko ghara ke pichavAr3e meM rakhavA diyA gyaa| seThajI apanI tajabIja para parama prasanna the / peTI ko ghara meM Aye do-cAra dina hI hue the / eka dina seThajI ke do bacce tathA par3ausI kA eka baccA lukAchipI kA khela khela rahe the / se ke bacce chipane ke lie sthAna khojate khojate peTI ke pAsa Aye / bar3e lar3ake ne kahA- calo, apane isa peTI meM chipa jaayeNge| hamArA sAthI hameM DhUMr3ha nahIM pAya | dUsare lar3ake ko bhI bAta ja~ca gaI to unhoMne peTI ko kholaa| yadyapi peTI kA Dhakkana bhArI thA, para chipane kI surakSita jagaha dekhakara donoM ne milakara Dhakkana ko andara se bandakara liyA / saMyoga kI bAta thI ki Upara se kapATa banda hote hI bAhara kI kaMDI laga gayI / aba to bacce bar3e ghabarAye, para koI ilAja nahIM thA / unhoMne jora bhI lagAyA, para peTI kA khulanA asaMbhava thaa| ve jora-jora se cillAye, para peTI itanI saMgIna banI huI thI ki unakI AvAja bAhara nahIM A sakI / unakA sAthI lar3akA unheM khojate khojate idhara AyA, para vaha soca bhI nahIM sakA ki peTI ke andara bhI koI baiTha sakatA / ataH vaha bicArA unheM DhUMDha DhUMr3hakara hAra gayA / Akhira yaha samajha kara ki bacce apane ghara meM cale gae hoMge, vaha bhI apane ghara lauTa gayA / thor3I dera taka bacce roe -cillAe, para unakI kauna sunane vAlA thA ? antata: prANavAyu ke abhAva meM unhoMne banda peTI meM hI apane prANatyAga die / zAma taka bhI jaba bacce nahIM Aye, taba seThAnI ko cintA huI / usane seThajI se kahA / seThajI ne idhara-udhara khoja karavAI, para bacce kahIM na mile| Akhira pulisa ko sUcanA dI gii| gAMva kA konA-konA chAna liyA gayA / kuMe-bAvar3iyAM chAna lI gaI, para kahIM para bhI bacce nahIM

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134 / nae maMdira : nae pujArI mile / isa rahasyamaya saMvAda se sArA gAMva AtaMkita ho gyaa| sAre loga alaga-alaga kalpanAeM karane lge| koI kimI sAdhu-sanyAsI kI bAta karanA to koI kisI uThAIgIra kii| kucha loga jaMgalI jAnavaroM kI bhI kalpanA karane lge| seThajI aura seThAnI kI hAlata to badatara ho gaI thI balki seThAnI to lagAtAra kaI ghaMToM taka besudha par3I rhii| anta meM eka jyotiSI ko pUchA gayo / usane batAyA ki bacce to ghara meM hI haiN| phira se ghara kI chAnabIna zurU huI / eka-eka konA chAnA gyaa| isI silasile meM jaba usa bakse ko kholA gayA to mare hue bacce prApta he| sArA parivAra zoka-saMtapta ho gyaa| eka rahasya khulane ke bAda dUsarA rahasya zurU ho gyaa| koI ise khUna hatyA kA kesa batA rahA thA, to koI daivI camatkAra, koI ise seThajI ke pApoM kA pariNAma batA rahA thA, to koI kisI garIba kI aah|

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lekhaka kI anya kRtiyAM 1. ulajhe tAra 2. anAyAsa 3. naitika pAThazAlA 4. aNuvrata kI kasauTI para 5. niggaMtha gAthA 6. acche bacce 7. naye maMdira naye pujArI 8. vijJAna ke saMdarbha meM jaina dharma 6. nirmANa ke bIja 10. jaina manovijJAna 11. prazna aura samAdhAna 12. jana-jana ke bIca AcAryazrI tulasI (do bhAga) 13. anagar3ha patthara 14. parinde 15. gItoM kA guladastA 16. aNuvrata ke patha para 17. AcArya zrI tulasI apanI hI chAyA meM

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