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Aptavani-9
85
Aptavani-9
How can there be moha (attachment due to
illusion) towards such betrayal?
The toilets that we have, are they used by many or just one person?
Questioner: Everyone uses them.
Dadashri: So a place everyone goes to is called a toilet. A place where many people go is called a toilet. A relationship of fidelity to one man and one woman is a conduct of virtue. Till then a woman's conduct is considered virtuous otherwise it is considered a toilet. How many people use the toilet in your home?
'we' think about what is going to become of that poor man. There is a safe side only if she is not good-looking.
A man will forget God when his wife is beautiful and a woman too, will forget God when her husband is good looking That is why it is good if everything is average. Our elders used to say, "Keep your farm barren and have an ugly wife.' Why did they say that? If your wife is beautiful, some man will have bad intentions towards her and that is why it is better to have an ugly wife. They were saying this from a different perspective, not from a religious perspective. 'We' are telling you from the religious perspective. You do not have to worry about anything if your wife is ugly. If she goes out, no one will have bad intentions towards her. Our elders were very smart, but that is not what we are telling you; it is quite different. If she is ugly, then it will not bother you; you will not be tormented and preoccupied by mistrust.
What a betrayal this is What kind of people do you find today? Wherever they see a 'hotel' (woman, sexual outlet), they will dine' (indulge in lustful fancy or more). Suspicion is the cause of all misery. Both men and women dine' wherever they see a 'hotel. A man does not think about what his wife is doing. He thinks she is a good woman, but he does not realize that she is cheating on him. Men cheat on their wives and the wives cheat on their husbands. Women however will win because men do not have as much kapar (deceit). That is why women easily deceive men.
This worldly life was worth enjoying when there was sincerity and morality in it. Nowadays there is tremendous betrayal. If we were to tell men about their wives, they would not even go to them. 'We'know everything about everybody but 'we' would not do anything about it. Men are not angels either, but a woman is a factory of sheer deceit. A warehouse of deceit is not to be found anywhere except in a woman.
Questioner: Everyone.
Dadashri: It is not used by just one person is it? So whether two people use it or everyone else does, then it is a toilet.
People will dine' when they come across a 'hotel'. Hey! They may even wine and dine! So get rid of any suspicion. With suspicion, you will lose the moksha that is in the palm of your hands. Therefore, you have to understand just this much that you are married and that she is your tenant! That is all you have to keep in your mind. Then whomever she goes out with, you should not harbor any suspicion. Your concern is only with your needs, is it not? When you need to use the toilet: go use it. That which cannot be refrained from visiting, is called a toilet. That is why the Gnanis have said that the worldly life is a betrayal.
Questioner: Why does it not appear as a betrayal?
Dadashri: Because of moha (illusionary attachment). And there has never been anyone to tell you so either. The train will stop only when someone waves a red flag, otherwise it will continue and become derailed.
