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Aptavani-9
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Aptavani-9
Questioner: No, no one has so far.
Dadashri: So if there is no allowance and agreement of taking anything with you, then why this unnecessary hassle? So do not take anything from this museum of the world' even if you like it a lot. If you do, you will have to suffer the consequences. But instead people put things in their pockets and they try to sneak out from the other side. Then they have to face the consequences of their actions when they are caught in their next life. So do not take anything: enjoy everything but do not make it 'mine. Can you say 'this is mine' to anything in the museum? What do you think?
Questioner: That is true.
Dadashri: Wherever there is quarrel, there verily is myness within (mamata). There is no quarrel with anyone on the outside. Then he will say, 'my wife is no good.' You fool, why do you say, 'my '? He still does not let go of his 'my-niess'. He would not let go of that would he?
Questioner: These words 'my' and 'no-good' are being used at the same time, such a thought never occurs to anyone!
Dadashri: Yes, he will even say, 'my wife is no good. She is worth divorcing. 'Spoken words have an effect. Every spoken word will have an effect. The effect of, 'She is not mine remains and the effect of 'she is mine,' remains. Saying, 'mine' makes it stick; saying 'not
mine' makes it leave A friend of ours was married for ten years and then his wife died leaving behind three young children. He used to cry and so I had gone to console him, as did many others. I asked him, 'Why are you crying? What is the point of it now?' he told me, 'But what about these three children? I am lost without her. I asked him, but what will you do? Is she going to come back?'
he replied, 'But I do not like it without her, what should I do about that?' I told him, 'You do not like being without your wife now but what if the two of you had met on a train eleven years ago? You would have shoved past her. You married her ten years ago but is it possible that even ten days prior to your marriage, you would have ignored her? Is that possible or not? he said, 'But I did not know her then, did I?' I told him, 'Would you not have insisted that she vacate your reserved seat on the train had you met her prior to your marriage?' He asked me what my point was. I told him that when he sat across from her under their wedding canopy and looked at her; that was when he twisted the first knot of 'my-ness' with her. The knot of mamata with her was tied by saying this is my wife' and she did the same by saying this is my husband'. I told him, 'neither of you had the mamata prior to your wedding day. From the time you got married, up until now, you have continuously twisted and tightened the knots of attachment of 'my, my my...' This created a mental effect; it has created a psychological effect. You will create a psychological effect even by saying it just once, whereas this is an effect of ten years worth.' He replied, 'Yes I do agree that a psychological effect has taken over me. How can I get rid of it now?' I told him, 'Now keep saying, 'not mine...not mine...not mine...' and thus unwind the knots exactly the way you had wound them! This is the only solution.'
In reality there is no bondage. It is merely a psychological effect that takes place, then when the wife dies leaving three children behind the poor man cries. He became happy after I explained things to him this way. As such there is no relation. It is all because one believes she is my wife...she is mine...mine that the attachment and my-ness (mamata) takes hold. And this effect will go away simply by saying 'she is not mine, not mine....' This 'we' guarantee you!
Anything that you get attached to by saying 'my or mine,"
