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Aptavani-9
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Aptavani-9
Still the 'I-ness' remains Some people think to themselves, "Now I do not have any 'I-ness' or 'my-ness' in me any more.' And yet whole daylong they live in kashaya. One claims he has no 'I-ness' and yet he experiences kashayas. In fact his 'I-ness' is the basis of his existence. His 'I-ness' does not go away. It is very difficult to get rid of
What does it mean to say that the 'I-ness' has gone away? It means that one does not even have any voice in it. Do you do according to what others tell you or do you have a different voice of your own within you?
Questioner: It is separate.
Dadashri: That is the 'I-ness' - the potapanu. 'We'do not have any voice of any kind. If someone tells 'us', 'Dada, sit over there 'we' will go and sit. 'We would do so even if we' do not like to.
Questioner: This "I-ness' is also related to the intellect (buddhi) is it not?
Dadashri: The intellect is the sign of 'I-ness'. As the sense of 'I-ness' goes down, the proportion of the intellect goes down too.
Questioner: What is the difference between 'I-ness' (potapanu) and 'my-ness' (maarapanu)?
Dadashri: My-ness is mamata and I-ness (potapanu) is a big ego. It is not a nominal ego.
After attaining this Gnan, You have let go of the T' (hoon) and 'my' (mamata), but You have not let go of potapanu - 1ness! There is no doubt that you have become free from 'T' and 'my'. What is the definition of mamata (my-ness)? It is to worry about something of yours when it has been lost. You do not experience any worry after something valuable is lost. This
shows that your l' and the 'my' are gone. Yet the 'I-ness' (potapanu) still remains.
Questioner: Does 'I-ness' mean individuality? I am different from others, is that what it is?
Dadashri: The individuality is gone. Both 'I' and 'my' are gone, but the 'I-ness' still remains. This is because, no matter how angry someone gets, no matter how much someone insults, he will fight with that person but he will eventually bring about resolution before he goes to bed. Therefore, this assures us that the ego is gone; otherwise, the ego will carry on the whole nightlong. A person without ego will fight but he will also find a solution whereas a person with an ego will not. He will continue to increase enmity. A person with mamata will holler and complain even three days after his pocket is picked. The moment someone reminds him of it, he will say, 'What can I do?' Whereas to you once it (wallet) is gone, it is gone. That shows that the ego of doer-ship (ahamkar) and mamata ('myness, the feeling of this is mine') are gone. However, the 'lness' (potapanu) still remains. Just see it
That is why Krupadudev has said, "The Gnani Purush does not have potapanu.' Krupadudev has used the word potapanu', he has written something significant. What do you think? Has he not used a great word? Now who can explain this? How can someone explain in the language Krupadudev has
used?
Questioner: The Gnani Purush can explain that can he
not?
Dadashri: Yes, because no one else can. The authority is gone, the 'l-ness' remains
Questioner: Please explain the following Aptasutra of Yours, Dada:
"How does the Gnani's antahkaran (the inner component
