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Aptavani-9
483
Dadashri: That is the protection of the prakruti. Otherwise, one would turn back just as fast; with the same speed, with the same tone and with the same mood. With the same mood that was there before. This is the talk of the final state! The Test of 'I-ness'
Say you are going somewhere with someone by car, he tells you to get in the car and you do. A little later, he tells you to get out of the car because someone else is coming instead, what would you do? Would you just sit there? Would you tell him, 'I am not getting off?'
Questioner: I would get out.
Dadashri: Immediately?
Questioner: Immediately! I would get off.
Dadashri: Would you not say, 'No I will not get out?' Then as you walk away, he calls you back. You would go back would you not? And you would do so without a change of expression on your face, right?
So what have I said? If you can do this nine times over without any effect at all within you, then I will tell you that you have become 'Dada'. If he does this to you nine times and you get on and off nine times, and during each of those nine times, You do not see the other person as the doer, and you see vyavasthit as verily the 'doer', then You are free from 'I-ness'. And if when you are invited back, there is nothing in the mind, the face remains smiling as if nothing has happened, and this is the case while getting off also, then you are free from 'I-ness'. Then see the beauty of it all! What is this state called? It shows that this 'one' is not protecting the prakruti and therefore the potapanu is gone.
Protecting your prakruti is 'I-ness'. But here the very prakruti one wants to be liberated from is the one he is protecting.
484
Aptavani-9
That is when 'I-ness' will go away
Now, I am not telling You that You should not protect your prakruti but You should feel that your Gnan must attain a certain level. I am not asking for such conduct (vartan or charitra). When will such conduct come? When this becomes established in your conviction (pratiti or shraddha), then it will result in gnan (knowledge). When this knowledge increases as experience (anubhav) then it will manifest in your conduct (vartan, charitra).
If someone were to ask you to get out of the car, there will be an initial effect (asar) but later as things calm down from within, you will remember Gnan. This way it will gradually gel and solidify from within and it will fit. At first, it comes as conviction pratiti, and later in the process of arriving at the level of experience (anubhav), you will stumble in 'fitting' the Gnan at first, but later it will come in your conduct. Even a little experience anubhav is more than enough.
If you are asked to get out of the car once or two times and you come back to sit without experiencing annoyance from within, or any change in the facial expression, that is very good also. Otherwise, are people not likely to get upset and noncommunicative (risavu)? I think that would not be the case with you, would it? Try to do that once, if such an occasion ever arises. Get out of the car and sit back in it without getting upset and non-communicative or spoiling your face.
Questioner: It is not as easy as You say, Dada.
Dadashri: It cannot be easy. But what is this? Why are 'we' discussing this? As this matter comes into your faith and conviction (shraddha-pratiti), it will gradually come into your experience (anubhav).
'We' are not telling you to do this. You simply have to keep this in your awareness that you will have to stop protecting
