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Aptavani-9
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Aptavani-9
If someone comes to me and complains about someone else, I would question him and take him to task first: 'Why did you come to tell me this? You came to complain, so you are the guilty one. 'Write-off everyone who comes complaining in this manner; such people are called busybodies. You should not even go near such people. No one has carried on a useless discussion with me. Even if such a person were to come to me, he will not be able to say a word. In fact, you should not believe what people tell you in matters of religion. I would not listen to anyone regarding even worldly matters. If someone were to say, "Hiraba was saying this,' then I would say, 'Why did you have to come and tell me this? What do you gain by telling me what she said?
Even in our satsang, you have to find the busybody and warn others about him. We do not have any attachment or abhorrence towards such a person but we do have to warn others.
How dare someone come to us and tell us things? Some people will come and tell you things as if they are your wellwishers. You should not listen to them when they are talking about someone else. You should know how to recognize such people and ask them 'Why have you come to tell me this? What kind of commission do you make from doing this? What do you gain by telling me all this?
In fact, you should not listen to talks about anyone. But people's minds have become weak today. You should not listen to talks that are destructive or talks that sabotage others; the reason being if you do, your mind will become adulterated towards that person and it will affect that person too. Man has no capacity to understand all this. The other person may be saying something indirectly and vaguely but the person listening takes it directly
And to say anything that will cause difficulties for another
human being is the biggest crime and yet people do this, don't they? A noble human being will cover up anything negative he hears about anyone. If someone says things in the heat of the moment, you should cover it up. 'Welding': Settling disputes and reuniting
Even before 'we' attained Gnan, I would not listen to talks that created a wedge between people. On the contrary, I would help mend other people's break up; I would do the 'welding' for them, but I encountered many difficulties when I tried to patch things up because I did not have Gnan.
Questioner: You say that you had many difficulties when you helped people reunite because of absence of Gnan, how is that?
Dadashri: I met with many obstacles. From a very young age, my nature was to 'weld' relationships. I would 'weld' wherever there were disputes. 'Welding' is the greatest attribute a person can have. No one will object to it, will they? I had lot of difficulties while welding but I still persisted.
Questioner: Did it ever occur to you that in trying to weld people together, one of them did not appreciate it?
Dadashri: No it was not like that. I made sure that both the parties were in agreement with my welding. The welding would not occur if it were not acceptable to both the parties. Welding is a special energy (siddhi). I would bring both the ends (people) together and then I would weld. But I subjected myself to a lot of harm in the process. Every time there was nothing but harm to me.
Questioner: In what way? Can you give us an example?
Dadashri: If two brothers had been fighting constantly, what would I do? I would do the welding for both of them. Now how long would my friendship be valuable to them? They both would value my friendship as long as they were fighting
