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SEPTEMBER 2014
PRABUDDH JEEVAN5
A SEEKERS DIARY...
Dear reader; I have changed the title of this column because I wish to have a conversation between us; to blend your thoughts with mine or to argue in your head when you disagree with me, or be an active participator or just to ponder - but need you with me while I pen my thoughts, feelings or experiences and share them with you.
Paryushan Parv is the closure of an old chapter and start of a new book with a fresh beginning and a new
title.
Paryushan Parv is my favourite time in the whole yearnothing else, no wedding, no event, no child birth; no friend, no loved one, no family member can peel me from these eight days of being within the folds of Jain theory, philosophy, practices, stories, 'siddhants.' It has been 15 years since Neela Ba (Neela Shashikant Mehta) made me fall in love with Paryushan and the love has continued and grown now under the umbrella of Pujyashri Rakeshbhai Jhaveri.
My inner resolves, 'ping' and I feel 'Ah'; moments; my feelings of utter piety and connection are felt with the most consistence in these eight days. My self observation and criticism are heightened, my self acceptance and motivation are propelled; my conviction and drive are at its height but finally they are just eight fleeting days and now they are gone. The solitude of my inner self replaced loudly under the fire crackers and cacophonic sounds of the arrival of our dear Elephant God.
At the onset, before my thoughts flow into another direction, I must say I like the sight of the elephant God - Ganpati Bapa - He is surely and utterly cuddlesome cute. And he really makes this city of Mumbai seem pretty secular with people from across states and communities celebrating his arrival with gusto and the air of festivity all around. Besides that, he is also the most international known Hindu God with millions of rupees coming in as we sell his idols as a souvenir, a good luck charm, or even just as a so perfect substitute and keepsake in absence of a thoughtful gift.
And this is where my thoughts trail off to reading five text messages from four close cousins and two friends who also born into and staunch practicing Jains sent me a simultaneous 'Michhammi Dukkadam' message
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and an invitation to come and visit them for their one day or three day or five day Ganpati Bappa darshan.' My feelings were a mix of concern, sadness, perplex and resignation. Four of them had started the practice this year- what made them do it? Peer pressure, hopes of an even better harvest (to be read - the market), a better and more agreeing spouse, a better grade, a better life or some such similar wish?. Since childhood, it was a yearly routine to go to my Mami's maternal home for the most beautiful diya, decoration, and creative Ganesh Mandaps at Lamington Road and the loudly sung 'Sukh Karta, Dukh harta....' sung in stoic Marathi, ending with delicious yellow modaks distributed after the aarti.
But even then, and much more now Gods to me are these beautiful beautiful beings in whose presence be it in temples, churches or Gurudwaras, my wants and desires just effortlessly fell off. Their beauty, their 'Tej', used to silence and just soften everything inside me. Everywhere when I came across our cute elephant God, I was told to ask from a pure heart and see how you will be married and have lovely babies and a comfortable life of luxury. Somehow better sense prevailed and I did not ask and perhaps so missed out on the wedding, the babies and the so called works. But my dear humsafars in this life journey, I really really want to know what makes us go and celebrate 'Paarnu' in Moti Shah Derasar or Agashy or Shahapur or whichever temple or do Pratikraman at the sanctity of our own home and next day rush to get Ganpati ji or go and visit all the Ganesh mandals we have heard of with that little subconscious hope that we might earn some brownie points and something will be set right in the missing pieces of our life.
Yes, the Veetrag path is easy only for people who are more geared towards self reliance and self sufficiency and very tough for people whose lives are constantly dependant and shaped by others, be it for their livelihood or states of mind or for their necessities, comforts, and luxuries. But do you really believe that an external God can change your life? Do you really wish to attribute your life choices of all the past and present lifetimes to a magic wand and do you really wish to shirk off all responsibility for any of your not so
