________________
place, he would go away to some secluded places, and do his meditation, or recite and learn by heart some scriptures and he reflected on those and meditated. In the last few years of his life, he lived a very hard austere life like a Jain monk.
:
Śrīmad died in his 34th year, living a life outwardly of a layman, with his inner state full of detachment and free from passions. He was very eager, long before his death, to renounce the worldly life and embrace monkhood, but he could not do so for a number of reasons. He could not physically and totally dissociate himself from worldly things, wife, family, wealth etc. even at the age of 31, for which he was very very sorry. One of the reaosns for which he could not renounce the worldly life and embrace a monk's life was his mother's affection for him; she did not allow him to renounce worldly life, in spite of his seeking permission many times. At the beginning of his 34th year, his health began to deteriorate because of acute dysentery. His weight came down to 45 pounds, but those who were close to him in his last days, his close associates and relatives, have recorded that even in his serious illness, he was internally very alert and gay and was never mentally or internally dejected or affected by the illness. On the contrary he would advise the persons near him to
70
;
