Harmony in Marriage

Author(s): Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation

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Harmony in Marriage
of family. For them when James turns twenty, his parents, William and Mary will tell him 'You are now on your own so that we two love birds can be on our own too!' They do not have the habit of organizing the family, and their family is very frank. If Mary does not get along with William, she will consider a divorce right away. In India, we never accept the idea of divorce. We stay together, we quarrel and then sleep in the same room. This is not what life is all about. This is not called family life. (3)
In India, people also have their own family doctor. How come you have a family doctor, when you do not even have a family? Family doctor means the doctor is part of family. But the wife is not. The treatment given to the wife is not of the kind you would give to a family member. She is treated like a non-family member at times. When the family doctor comes, they do not quarrel with him. Even if he leaves behind a big bill, they will not argue with him. They'll say 'this is our family doctor!" One thinks that he is someone with a status by having his own family doctor! (5)
Do you quarrel with a family member even if he hurts you by accident? No. You should live like a family. You should not pretend. People put up pretence. It should not be like that. One family. Tell her that you don't like being separated from her. When she gets upset with you, after a little while just tell her 'No matter what you say to me, however much upset you get with me, I miss you when you are not here!' Just go ahead and say this "Guru Mantra" (special words that bring great results). You never express your love and appreciation to your wife, do you? What is the problem in doing so? Say, 'I do not like being away from you.' You should keep most of your love to yourself, but do share and express some of it. (6)
Harmony in Marriage
Chapter 2
QUARREL AT HOME
Do you ever quarrel at home? What do you think about clash in the home, do you like it?
Questioner: The world does not function without
quarrel.
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Dadashri: Then God would not stay there at all. Wherever there is clash God will not stay there.
Questioner: But at least there should be some quarrel,
sometimes.
Dadashri: No, there should not be any quarrel. Why should there be any quarrel? What is the reason for a quarrel? Are you comfortable with any quarrel? How many months can you live with conflicts?
Questioner: Not a single moment.
Dadashri: Not even for a month? You get to eat nice meals, wear beautiful gold jewellery and yet you have to quarrel. It is because you do not know how to live life; you do not know the art of living. That is the cause of quarrels. All we know of is the art of making dollars. That is where your thoughts are preoccupied but you never think about how to live life. Shouldn't you think about this?
Questioner: We should think about it, but everyone has a different approach.
Dadashri: No, everyone's ways are not different, they are all the same. Dollars. Where can I make a dollar! Then when one earns some money, he would go to a store and buy something for the house. He brings it home, but does he have