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Harmony in Marriage
Harmony in Marriage
Dadashri: Remove all clashes from your life. Otherwise, you will lose your right to be a human being in your next life. Human birth is the result of vast acts of merit in previous lives. To be of Indian parentage and birth is even a higher blessing. For you all Indians here in the US and the UK, there is no shortage of material conveniences and pure healthy food and is further evidence of your higher meritorious acts of past life. What a tragedy it will be if you waste all this by clash.
Our home life should be free from clash. We should be capable of at least this much. If the wife does not know anything else, then you should explain to her: 'if there is clash in our home, God will go away. So therefore let us make a decision that we do not want to have any more clash in our home'. Having made this decision, if clash still takes place, then understand that it is outside your control. So, if she starts any conflicts, just get under the bed covers and go to sleep. She too will go to sleep after a while. However, what would happen if you answer her back?
Why don't you decide not to clash at least for three days and see what happens! What is wrong with experimenting? Some people fast for three days, to improve their health. Don't they? Similarly, try this too. All of you at home should sit down together and decide. 'I liked what Dada was saying, and we will not allow any clash from this moment.' Then just see what happens.
Questioner: Here, in America, even the women go out to work, so they feel a sense of power, and this leads to an increase in conflicts between husband and wife.
Dadashri: It is good if the women become a little powerful. We should think that, wow! They were powerless
but now it is good, at least they have some power in them! The cart will run better. Is it better to have weak bullocks pulling the cart or powerful ones?
Questioner: If the power is used properly, then it is fine, but if that power were to be misused, then the cart would run poorly.
Dadashri: If there is no one to accept the effect of her power, then it will just bounce with the wall. When she uses that power and it does not perturb you, then all her power bounces off the wall back to her. This will hurt her.
Questioner: You are trying to tell us that we shouldn't listen to what they are saying?
Dadashri: Do listen. Listen to everything very carefully. If it is beneficial to you listen to everything, but if her power causes clash, then remain silent. You should just observe the degree of intoxication of her ego. The use of the power is dependent upon the degree of intoxication of the ego.
Questioner: That is true. Similarly should we do the same when the men use their power unnecessarily?
Dadashri: That is when you have to exercise the same care. "Hmm, today he seems to be in a scolding mood...' You can tell this to yourself in your mind. But do not say anything to his face.
Questioner: Yes.... otherwise he will add fuel to fire.
Dadashri: Things are off today...sold and scorn is the event of the moment....It should not be so. Be aware of this process. How beautiful the friendship is between two friends! Can two friends act in this manner? Would they remain friends if they act in this manner? Husband and wife are considered
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