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Harmony in Marriage
Harmony in Marriage
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arguments takes place? What kind of discord takes place? If you both write all this down on a piece of paper and bring it to me, I will solve all of them for you in an hour. They occur because of misunderstanding. Nothing else.
All the problems of the home should stay within the four walls of your home. That is the type of life one should live. If you make just this much of a change it is very good. There should be absolutely no clash. You should live within your means. If you do not have enough money, then you should not be in a hurry to buy saris (attire of the Indian women). You should think that you should not put your husband in a difficult situation. Spend only if you have the money. (126)
Chapter 7 OVERHEATED RADIATOR OF A CAR
If sometimes the husband comes home late, due to certain circumstances, the wife will comment "Huh!... Why did you come home so late?' Don't you think he knows that he is late? He is already feeling uncomfortable about being late and then on top of that the wife has to nag about how late he is. Poor man. This is all meaningless talk. Do you understand all this? So if he comes home late some day, then you have to see what kind of a mood he is in. If he is not in a good mood. then give him a nice cup of tea and get him in a good mood, before he sits down to dinner. Don't you offer a cup of tea to a policeman, if he comes to your house, even if you are not in a good mood? Now this is your own husband, so shouldn't you please him? He is your own, so you have to make him happy. Lot of you may know what happens when a car gets overheated. Do we hit it with a stick or do we come up with ways to cool the radiator down? You have to cool the radiator, turn on the fan. Can you not do that?
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Questioner: What is the way to stop him from drinking brandy?
Dadashri: When he sees love in your home he will stop everything. He is ready to stop anything for love. When he does not see love at home, he falls in love with the brandy. He will fall in love with this or fall in love with that. Otherwise he will wander around on the beach all day. You fool! What is it that you are going to find there, go home, why don't you? So he will say "But I don't like it at home'.
(131) Chapter 8 TO IMPROVE OTHERS OR ONE'S OWNSELF?
These relations are relative, temporary. A lot of husbands become so obsessed in trying to improve their wives that it destroys the love between them. He thinks he has to improve her. You fool, why don't you improve? Improve just once. Besides, she is not yours permanently. She will leave you when she leaves this world. One day the relationship will end. This is just temporary, so take care of her, come to an agreement with her and enjoy her company in harmony.
(136) Questioner: Prakruti (a person's inherent characteristics, tendencies, personality etc.) cannot be improved but shouldn't worldly interactions improve?
Dadashri: People do not understand the nature of worldly interaction. It is enough if people had known this even for half an hour. What is right worldly interaction? Superficial. Right worldly interaction does not mean insisting on the truth. People believe that insistence on the truth is right worldly interaction. This is all relative and temporary. This type of behaviour is of no importance when it comes to salvation and real freedom. Stop fretting and get your work done. Worldly
