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104
Harmony in Marriage
Harmony in Marriage
105
Questioner: The Soul does not have any gender right?
Dadashri: The Soul does not have a gender. The prakruti has a gender. If you have a stock of bright goods, then bright goods will come out, and if you have a stock of dark goods, then dark goods will come out. Prakruti too, is a stock that is stored within. It is called pudgal (body). So whatever that was taken in (puran), continues to dissipate (galan). Eating food is puran, going to the bathroom is galan. Every breath is all pudgal (body) paramanu (atoms). (436)
If one wants to be a purush (man), it will happen when moha (attachment) and kapat (deceit) go away. When these two parmanus (atom complexes) of moha and kapat unite, a woman is formed, and when anger and pride unite, a man is formed. All this occurs according to the science of parmanus.
(439) Once, a few ladies admitted to me that they have certain major faults, but of all these faults which fault is the most damaging? I told them the most damaging fault is to make others behave according to her expectation. Every woman has a wish to make others do what she wants. She even manages to change her husband by means of deceit, and then makes him do what she wants. This is wrong. It is a wrong approach. I have made them write down and promise that they will not do this. What is the reason for making someone comply with one's own expectations? It is very harmful.
Questioner: If it benefits the family, then what is wrong with it?
Dadashri: No. One is never able to do any good with this approach. Those women, who do things only according to their expectations, never do any good for their family. The
family would only benefit if things happened according to everyone's expectations. It only happens if no one is hurt in the process. Those who go around making everyone do things according to their own expectation are doing great damage to their family. This is the main instrument that causes conflicts and quarrels. If things do not go according to her expectation, then she would sit around sulking, she would not eat. Who can she beat up? So she sits there shouting. Then the next day she will employ deceit. What kind of a woman is that? What happens if one does not succeed in trying to get things done according their expectation? You ladies should not insist on these things. You need to become broad minded and big hearted.
Questioner: Women soften their husbands through their tears and even if they are wrong, they will insist that they are right. What do you have to say regarding this matter?
Dadashri: That is very true. She will have to pay for her wrongdoing. Furthermore, by such acts she loses her credibility and trust with her husband.
(441) Those husband is naive raise your hand? I asked some ladies. All the ladies who raised their hands, will tell me in confidence, 'My husband is naive, he is completely naive.' That statement itself shows that these women play with their husbands like toys. It looks bad to expose this matter in public. Would it not look bad? One cannot say everything openly. If I ask the ladies confidentially 'Is your husband naive?' 'Very naive, very naive.' Her deceit makes her see him as naive. This deceit is bad. There are many other good qualities in her.
(442) Questioner: On the one hand a woman is called Laxmi
