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Harmony in Marriage
Harmony in Marriage
are at peace within and are not subject to any stress, internal or external, regardless of your worldly situation. To revert to your Real nature is the final definition of religion.
this? You bring home the money, and she does all this for you. This is the way a partnership works. The children are the product of your partnership. They are not solely hers, are they? Just because she went though pregnancy does that mean, they belong only to her? Children belong to both of you. Do they belong to you both or her alone?
Questioner: Both of us.
Dadashri: Yes. Are the men going to go through pregnancy? Therefore, this world is worth understanding. It needs to be understood from many different viewpoints. Only a Gnani Purush can make you understand the world as it is. He makes you understand what is good or bad for you. Then there will be an end of clashes at home.
Lord Krishna has said that there are two kinds of intellect; the helpful intellect and the harmful intellect. The harmful intellect brings forth only pain and misery. The helpful intellect brings forth happiness and seeks out happiness in the midst of pain and suffering. Here in America you get such good food, pure ghee and pure yoghurt. They add earth gravel to good basmati rice and eat them! Life is easy but people do not know how to live. That is why they suffer.
We should be thinking about what is beneficial to us. What is beneficial of the two; remembering the happiness of the day you got married or remembering the sorrow of the day you became a widower?
If your wife was holding a stack of dishes and glassware and she drops them, would you be affected by it? (15)
You cannot avoid saying something when you are affected or hurt. You cannot prevent turning on your radio. The moment you get hurt, your radio will come on, which in turn will hurt her. Then she will say, 'As if you never break anything in your life. This is very important to understand. These dishes do break don't they? If you tell her to break the dishes, she would not, would she? What is it that breaks them? There is no person in this world with an independent strength to break even a single dish. All of these are accounts that are being settled. If anything breaks through the medium of your wife, ask gently, "Are you hurt my dear?"
(16) If you fight over a couch, then throw that couch away. That couch is worth only a few hundred dollars. Is it worth fighting over? It will only sew the seeds of hate. Just get rid of it. Anything that causes conflicts in the home should be thrown away.
(17) The more you understand, the greater your faith. With faith, results will follow. Without faith, it will not help. If you do things with understanding, your life will be happy and it will make her life happy too. Doesn't she make you wonderful meals?
Questioner: Yes, she does.
Dadashri: What more then? Shouldn't you be obligated to her because she is your partner? What is her obligation in
(18)
(21)
The thought of becoming a widower came to me during our marriage ceremony. I had a classy new elaborate turban of the kind the princely classes wear at marriage. Dressed in this manner even as a fifteen-year-old groom I looked very handsome. My attire was bedecked and impressive. Later on
