Meri Jivan Prapanch Katha

Author(s): Jinvijay
Publisher: Sarvoday Sadhnashram Chittorgadh
Catalog link: https://jainqq.org/explore/001970/1

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merI jIvana prapaMca kathA muni jinavijaya likhita, 'jIvana kathA' kA uttara bhAga sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava vi.saM. 2032 sumi jinavijayajI dvArA sthApita sarvodaya sAdhanA Azrama dvArA prakAzita canderiyA, cittaur3agar3ha (rAjasthAna) 113 1676 I. san wwwwwjaihelibrary.org.

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merI jIvana prapaMca kathA muni jinavijaya likhita, 'jIvana kathA' kA uttara bhAga sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava muni jinavijayajI dvArA sthApita sarvodaya sAdhanA Azrama dvArA prakAzita canderiyA, cittaur3agar3ha (rAjasthAna vi. saM. 2032 1676 I. san

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prakAzaka : kezarapurI gosvAmI mukhya prabaMdhaka : sarvodaya sAdhanA Azrama canderiyA (citaur3agar3ha) prathamAvRtti : 250 prati mudraka : sundaralAla paTavAro citrakUTa priMTiMga presa cittaur3agar3ha (rAjasthAna ) pharavarI 1676 mulya : 2 rupaye 50 paise

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kiMcita prAstAvika pAThaka ke hAtha meM jo panne haiM, inameM merI pUrva prakAzita jIvana kathA ke kucha Age ke saMsmaraNa prAlekhita haiM / inake prAlekhana ke viSaya meM inhIM pRSThoM meM, prArambha meM thor3A sA ullekha kiyA gayA hai| usa ullekhAnusAra pichale do tIna mahinoM meM jo kucha saMsmaraNa meM likha sakA unako isa rUpa meM maiMne prakAzita karanA ucita samajhA hai / jaisA ki ina saMsmaraNoM ke par3hane se jJAta hogA ki mere ye saMsmaraNa usa jIvana ke sAtha sambandha rakhate haiM, jinako maiMne "sthAnakavAsI sampradAya kA jIvanAnubhava" aisA nAma diyA hai / vikrama saM0 1956 ke Azvina mAsa meM digThANa nAmaka mAlave ke eka gAMva meM maiMne sthAnaka vAsI nAma se paricita jaina sampradAya ke sAdhu kA veSa dhAraNa kiyA aura vikrama saM0 1965 ke prAzvina mAsa meM hI mAlave ke ujjaina nAmaka nagara meM usa veSa kA parityAga kiyaa| isa prakAra prAya: 6 varSa, maiM isa veSa meM rahA / ina chaH varSo meM maiMne apane jIvana meM kyA kyA anubhava prApta kiye, unakA digdarzana ina sasmaraNoM meM prAlekhita huA hai / maiM nahIM mAnatA ki mere ye anubhava kisI anya vyakti ke lie upayogI hoNge| maiMne kevala apane hI rugNa mana ko bahalAne ke lie ye saMsmaraNa likha DAlane kA nirarthaka prayAsa kiyA hai| mere jIvana ke ina kSudra granubhavoM meM kisI ko kucha grahaNa karane yogya koI bAta nahIM hai| mere jovana ke prapaMca kA yaha eka varNanAtmaka bhAga hai / isase pUrva prakAzita kathA meM jIvana ke bAlya kAla ke anubhava prAlekhita hue haiN| usake bAda maiMne jIvana ke dUsare caraNa meM praveza kiyaa| isa caraNa meM mujhe prAbhAsa hone lagA ki merA yaha jIvana eka prapaMcamaya hai / prapaca kA artha sAmAnya rupa se saba koI samajhate haiM / usake gaMbhIra artha kI kaI carcA meM yahAM nahIM krtaa| maiM dhIre dhIre samajhane lagA ki manuSya kA sArA jovana prapaMcamaya hai, isalie pUrva prakAzita pustikA ke anurupa isako kevala "jIvana kathA" nAma na dekara "jIvana prapaMca kathA" nAma rakhanA mujhe ucita lagA / isa nAma kA sphuraNa mujhe mahAkavi siddharSi kI banAI huI, "upamitibhava prapaMcAkathA " ke nAma se huA | mahAkavi siddharSi ne saMsAra ke jIvoM ke bhava arthAta jIvana ke prapaMcAtmaka antara-bAhaya bhAvoM kA svarupa citrita karane ke lie usa kathA kA nirmANa kiyA / vaha jaina sAhitya kI eka adbhuta racanA hai| usake par3hane se vicArazIla manuSya ko jIvoM ke zubhAzubha

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( 2 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA karmoM ke pariNAmoM aura unake sukha duHkhAdi phaloM kA gabhIra jJAna prApta hotA hai| maiM bhI apane isa jIvana prapaMca meM aneka zubha-azubha prAdi karma karatA rahA hU~ aura unake sukha duHkhAdi phaloM kA bhI anubhava karatA rahA hU~ isalie maiMne apanI isa kathA ko jovana kA prapaMca batalAne vAlI kathA ke nAma se aMkita kiyA hai| isakA adhika vizleSaNa karane kI AvazyakatA nahIM hai ... .......... sabhava hai ki bahuta se sthAnakavAsI bhAiyoM ko mere ye anubhava rucikara nahIM mAlUma deM. kyoMki maiMne jo anubhA prAvita kiye haiM ve kinhoM ko kucha prAkSepAtmaka laga sakate haiM / para inake likhane meM merA vaimA koI uddezya nahIM rahA hai| maiMne to kevala mere mana para anubhavoM ne jo kucha chApa DAlI unhIM kA zabda citra mAtra prAlekhita kiyA hai / maiM usa veSa meM jitane dina rahA, ghUmA-phirA, veSa ke anurupa prAcAra dharbha kA yathA yogya pUrI taraha pAlana karatA rahA / prArambha meM to merI upa para dRr3ha zraddhA rahI / maiMne jaba dakSA lI, taba maiM koI ThIka par3hA likhA bhI nahIM thA aura na mujha meM vaisA koI virakta bhAva ho jAgRta huprA thaa| abodha mana ko saMsarga vizeSa ke kAraNa usa veSa koraNa karane kI icchA ho paayii| pIche se thor3A thor3A jJAna prApta hone para sAdhu jIvana kA kucha mahatva samajha meM prAne lagA / isa jIvana kA uddezya kyA hai aura use kisa taraha siddha karanA cAhiye ? isakA koI mArga darzana karAne vAlA nahIM milA / bAlya jIvana ke kucha pUrvAnubhava mana meM jo dabe hue the, ve kabhI kabhI prasaMga pAkara aspaSTa sa se jAga bhI uThate the / kabhI mAtA kI smRti A jAtI kabhI apane pUrvajoM kI smRti prA jAtI, kabho divaMgata guru yattivayaM devI haMsajo kI bhI smati ho AtI thI kyoM maiMne khAtrI bAbA kA veSa dhAraNa kara liyA ? kyoM use chor3a diyA ityaadi| kaI saMsmaraNa mana meM kabho jaga jAte aura ve cAlU jIvana ke anubhavoM ke sAtha TakarAte / isake pariNAma svarupa merA mana vicalita hotA gayA tathA sAtha meM jyoM-jyoM mujhe kucha viziSTa vidyA adhyayana karane kI lAlasA utpanna hotI gaI aura usakA vartamAna jIvana mArga meM calate rahane se saMtuSTa honA asaMbhava divAI diyA, taba maiMne jIvana kA koI dUsarA rAstA khojanA nizcita kiyaa| usake pariNAma svarupa mujhe usa veza kA parityAga karanA pdd'aa| maiM jisa samudAya meM thA, vaha choTA sA hI samudAya thaa| kinhIM anya samudAyoM ke sAtha merA koI vizeSa paricaya nahIM huA / anya samudAyoM meM sAdhu jIvana kI kaisI sthitI thI, usakA mujhe ThIka jJAna nahIM thaa| sthAnakavAsI sAdhu jIvana ke mere ye alpa svalpa saMsmaraNa bhAje se koI 65-70 varSa se pahale ke hai, usa samaya ke aura vartamAna samaya ke sAdhu jIvana meM

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kiMcita prastAvika bahuta bar3A grAkAza pAtAla jitanA antara dikhAI detA hai / aba to usa sAdhu sampradAya meM bhI vidyAdhyayana kA bahuta pracAra huA hai| | aneka sthAnakavAsI sAdhu saMskRta, prAkRta ke acche jJAtA aura vidvAna hai / unameM aneka navIna paddhati ke graMtha Adi likhane vAle bhI acche lekhaka sAdhu hai / aneka prabhAvazAlI pravaktA bhI hai / aura samayAnusAra vividha prakAra kI dhArmika, sAmAjika, zaikSaNika aura sAhityika pravRtiyoM meM bhI viziSTa bhAga lene vAle hai / iname kaI sAdhunoM ke bhAcAra aura vicAra meM bhI bahuta parirvatana hotA huA dikhAI de rahA hai / vartamAna dezakAla ke anurUpa kaI parivartana aise bhI lagate hai jinakA zAyada jaina sAdhu ke vAstavika AcAra ke sAtha koI sambandha nahA rahA hai / yahAM taka ki hAla hI meM eka bahuta bar3e pratiSThita zramaNa sAdhuvarya proghA aura muMhapati svarupa sAdhu vaiSa ke viziSTa cinha ko dhAraNa kiye hue, AkAza yAna dvArA pRthvI kI pradakSiNA bhI kI / aisA sunA gayA hai ki unhoMne amerikA meM vizva ke rASTrasaMgha jaisI mahattI sabhA meM bhI upasthita hokara bhagavAna mahAvIra ke sarvotkRSTa tyAgamaya jIvana kA paricaya karAyA tathA svayaM ko mahAvaura ke anuyAyI sAdhu zreSTha zramaNa dharma ke kaThora AcArapAlaka ke rUpa meM pratyakSa diggadarzana karAyA ( 3 ) I sAdhu jIvana kI aisI nUtana caryA ko sunakara maiMre jaise atyalpa mati vAle manuSya ke mana meM sahasA saMskRta bhASA kI usa prasiddha utikA smaraNa ho prAyA jo kahatI hai ki - kimAzcarya mataH parama ? parama nirgratha zramaNa bhagavana mahAvIra prabodhita nirgrathanAmavArI zramaNa kahalAne vAle sAdhu ke sAdhu jIvana meM isase bar3hakara aura kyA parivartana ho sakatA hai ? isase meM mAnatA hUM ki mere jIvana ke anubhava meM Ane vAle upa avikasita kSudra kAla: maya dazaka ke bAda bota jAne vAle chaH dazAbdoM meM deza ke samagra rASTra jIvana meM prAcAra aura vicAroM kA jA vilakSaNa parivartana huA hai, usI ke anurUpa jaina sAdhuyoM ke prAcAra aura vicAroM meM bhI vilakSaNa parivartana hone jA rahA hai / bhava aneka bar3e-bar3e sAdhu bar3I-bar3I sabhAo kA Ayojana karavAte haiM / aisI bar3I sabhAoM meM ve svayaM jAte haiM / aneka patra-patrikAeM tathA pustakeM Adi aura unakA vimocana karavAne ke lie prasiddha rAjakIya netAoM tathA minisTaroM Adi ko bulavAte haiM / vAte haiM

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( 4 ) rAjakIya evaM sAmAjika kArya karane vAle aneka prakAra ke logoM ke sAtha, samAna Asana para baiThakara, phoTU Adi khIcavAte haiM aura unheM patroM meM prakAzita karavAte haiM / mero jovana prapaMca kathA : reDiyo sTezano meM jAkara vArtAlApa, paribhASaNa Adi kA Ayojana karavA kara nakA AkAzavANI dvArA prasAraNa kArya prAdi karavAte haiN| mere usa saMkIrNa jIvana kI dRSTi se ye saba bAteM mujhe kisI anya deza kAla kI ghaTanAoM jaisI zrAbhASita hotI hai / jaina sAdhutroM ke jIvana meM aisA parirvatana kabhI ho sakegA, isakI mujhe usa samaya kalpanA bhI nahIM ho sakatI thI / jisa prakAra maiMne usa sAdhu jIvana meM maile-kucaile vastra pahane the vaise maile-kucaile vastra aba ye sAdhu nahIM pahanate haiM / inake vastra jinako jaina grAgama meM ghaTTA-maTTA TipaTTA - pAMDurapaTTa-pAvaraNA jaise zabdoM se prAlekhita kiyA hai, vaise zubhra dhauta vastra ye sAdhu pahanate haiM / mu~ha pati bhI vaisI ujjavala aura zubhra rakhate haiN| jisako dekhakara aisA AbhAsa ho jAtA hai ki mAnoM usakI istrI kI gaI ho / terApaMthI samudAya vAle sAdhuyoM meM to yaha bAta vizeSa rUpa se dRSTi gocara hotI hai / lambI DaMDI vAlA rajoharaNa aba rajayAnI dhUla kA haraNa karane vAlA nahIM hai parantu eka zobhA kA alaMkaraNa sA bana gayA hai aura terApaMthI samudAya vAle sAbupro ke pAna tA rajoharaga ko plAsTika ke AvaraNa se DhakA huA bhI devA gayA hai / maiM ina bAnoM ko sAdhuyoM meM jo vicAra parivartana ho rahA hai / usA ke pariNAma svarUpa mAnatA hU~ / ina parivartanoM ke sAtha maiM jaba apane jIvana ke prAlekhita kSudra sasmaraNoM kA milAna karatA hU~ to kabhI kabhI mujhe aisA bhAsa hone lagatA hai ki kyA mere ye saMsmaraNa vAstavika avasthA ke dyotaka haiM yA svapnAvastha ke ? mujhe usa jIvana kI jaba moTI-moTI bAteM yAda AtI haiM to mujhe vismaya sA ho AtA hai| ki kisa taraha maiMne usa jIvana kI caryA kA pAlana kiyA ? mujhe yAda rahA hai ki jaba se maiMne usa pandraha varSa kI nAbAliga avasthA meM vaha dIkSA lI, tabase lekara prAya: ikkosa varSa kI vAliga kahalAne vAle avasthA taka jaba maiM pahu~cA, taba maiMne usa veSa kA parityAga kara diyA / usa veSa meM rahate hue, maiMne nimna prakAra kI caryA kA anusaraNa kiyA / maiMne kabhI pAnI se zarIrakA prakSAlana nahIM kiyA / jo vastra milA, use pahate-pate phaTane taka kabhI pAno se nahIM dhoyA / zarIra ko Dhakane ke lie kevala tIna caddara aura do-tIna colapaTTI rakhe / koI garma kambala kabhI nahIM liyA / bichAne ke lie cha: phuTa lambA

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kacita prastAvika ( 5 ) 3 phuTa caur3A khaddara ke mauTe se kapar3e kA Tukar3A kAma meM letA thA / pa.ne ke lie kevala hAtha kI likhI huI pothiyAM thii| chapI huI koI pustaka pAsa nahIM rakhI thii| kabhI kisI ko apane hAtha se posTakArDa yA patra nahIM likhA / pAtI prAyaH dhovana vAlA liyA jAtA thA kabhI usake na milane para garama pAnI liyA jAtA thA / ahAra ke aAdhAmika prAdi jo aneka doSa haiM unako TAlakara hI vaha grahaNa kiyA jAtA thA / cAturmAsa ke dinoM ke sivAya sadaiva jamIna hI sonA hotA thA / sUryAsta se lekara sUryodaya taka apane sthAna se rAtri ko bAhara nikalanA nahIM hotA thA / vihAra meM bhI sUryAsta ke ho jAne para jahAM kahIM yogya sthAna mila jAtA vahAM hI rAtri vyatIta karanI hotI thI / vihAra meM cAhe jitanI lambo saphara karanI par3ato to bhI 2(do)kosa se adhika dUra pAhAra pAnI nahIM le jAte the| apane vastra pAtra Adi sabhI upakaraNa svaya hI uThAkara calate the / rAste meM calate hue kisI se bAta cIta karanI nahIM hotI thI / calate hue agara bhUla se kisI harI vanaspatI para paira par3a jAtA to usake prAyazcita svarUpa eka eka upavAsa kA daNDa hotA thaa| prati chaH mAsa mastaka ke kezoM kA loca karanA anivArya hotA thaa| cAturmAsa ke sivA kisI bho sthAna meM eka mAsa se adhika rahanA nahIM hotA thaa| dainika caryA ke khayAla se sadaiva pAhAra pAnI se nipaTanA, zaucAdi ke lie gAva bAhara ho AnA aura bhakI samaya meM kucha nayA sI vanA aura sIkhe hue kA punarAvatA karanA yahI mukhya kArya rahatA thaa| maiM apane hAtha se vidhi pUrvaka banAI gaI syAhI se kucha sUtra pATha tathA thokar3oM prAdi kI likhAI karatA rahatA thA / bAda ke varSoM meM marAThI bhASA kA adhyayana karanA zurU kiyA thA / hindI merI mAtRbhASA nahIM thI tathApi mArave meM rahane ke kAraNa TUTI-phUTI hi do jAnatA thaa| usase adhika merA koI khAsa bhASA jJAna nahIM thA / na maiMne kabhI koI akhabAra yA patra patrikAe~ par3hI / sAdhuoM ke sahavAsa meM samudAya / sambandhita koI bAta-va te hA jAyA karatI / isase adhika ciMtana kA koI khAsa kSetra nahIM thA / jaina Agama tayA thokar3e jaise prakaraNoM kA svAdhyAya karate hue unameM ulikhita kSetrAdi kA vivAra hunA karatA / svarga naraka Adi paraloka kI bAtoM kA bhI kucha UhApoha huaA karatA / jIva-grajAtra Adi padArtho kA thor3A-thor3A jJAna prApta hotA rahatA thaa| inameM se kucha bAtoM ke vizeSa jJAna ko jijJAsA mujha meM utpanna huA karatI, parantu usakA samAdhAna prApta karane kA usa samaya meM koI sAdhana na na karane kA usa samaya meM koI sAdhana nahIM thaa| isa prakAra kI mere usa sAdhu jIvana kI caryA kA kSetra bahuta sImita thaa| maiM jitane dina taka usa veSa meM rahA, usa caryA kA yathA yogya pAlana karatA rahA parantu maiM apanI vidyA par3hane kI tIvra abhirUci ke kAraNa mujhe usa paricaryA kA parityAga karanA par3A /

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mero jovana prapaMca kathA.. Upara jo maiMne vartamAna meM kitaneeka sAdhuoM ke vicAroM aura prAcAroM meM dikhAI dene vAle parivartana ko lakSya kara kucha bAteM kaho haiM, unakA uddezya kevala vartamAna sthiti kA citraNa karanA mAtra hI hai| merA isameM koI AkSepAtmaka athayA niMdAtmaka bhAva bilkula nahIM hai| kyoMki usa jIvana ke bAda ukta sampradAya ke sAtha merA na kipI prakAra kA koI sambandha ho rahA aura na mere mana meM usa caryA kA koI AkarSaNa yA mahattva ho rahA / maiM to usake bAda sadA ke lie anya hI jIvana meM paribhramaNa karatA rahA / maiM to yoM atyanta parivartana priya madhya hU~ / mere mana kA gaThana to viziSTa prakAra ke parivartana zIla pudgaloM se hI huA hai aisA maiM samajha rahA huuN| jaba se maiMne kucha hoza sambhAlA taba se maiM apane jIvana mArga meM satat parivartana karatA rahA hai| isa parivartana meM mujhe kisI prakAra kA pUrvAgraha bAdhaka nahIM huaaa| jaba kabhI mere vicAroM meM parivartana kA koI viziSTa kAraNa nimitta banA to maiM turanta hI usake anurUpa parivartana karane ko tatpara hotA rahA huuN| apane antara ko aAMdolita karane vAle prabala vicAroM ke pariNAma svarUpa parivartana karane meM maiMne kisI sthAna, kisI samudAya, kisI pakSa yA kisI kArya vizeSa kA koI bandhana svIkAra nahIM kiyA aise ha parivartanazola svabhAva ke kAraNa maiMne kaI priya sthAna chor3a diye aura kaI sampradAya vizeSoM ke bandhana tor3a diye| vaMse hI viziSTa saMsthAnoM kA sammAnAspada sambandha bho mujhe chor3anA par3A / aise kaI prakAra ke parivartana karate rahane meM mujhe kisI prakAra ko hicakicAhaTa anubhava nahIM huI / maiM parivartanazIla prakRti ko jIvana kI prAti kA viziSTa tatva mAnatA hai / isalie jo koI bhI manuSya apane antara ke vicarAnusAra parivartana karatA hai usake prati mere mana meM kisI prakAra kA pramAdara bhAva utpanna nahIM hotA / ataH jo koI sAdhu muni apane antara ko lakSya kara svIkRta AcAra vicAroM meM kisI viziSTa uddezya se parivartana karatA hai, to maiM usako prAdara kI dRSTi se hI dekhatA rahatA hai| phira merI yaha bhI mAnyatA rahI hai ki aba taka hama kisI sampradAya vizeSa kA bheSa dhAraNa kiye hue haiM taba taka hamArA prAcAra bhI usI. ke anurupa honA cAhiye / vicAra parivartana ke sAtha prAcAra meM bhI parivartana, kiyA jAtA hai to tadanusAra veSa kA bhI parivartana karanA cAhiye anyathA vaha eka prakAra kA dAMtrika jIvana hogaa| vyavahAra meM bhI veSa ke anurUpa karma arthAtta prAcAra ko saMgatatA sambandhita hai / pulisa ke kapar3e pahanane vAle manuSya se loga yahI apekSA rakhate haiM ki usakA vyavahAra usake svIkRta

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kiMcita prastAvika (7) rakSA karma ke anurUpa honA cAhiye / yadi pulisa ke kapar3e pahanane vAlA manuSya zAka sabjI becane kA kAma karatA dikhAI de to use dekha kara logoM ke dila meM kaise bhAva utpanna hoM ? isI taraha sAdhu veSa dhAraNa kiye hue manuSya kA vyavahAra bhI usake veSAnurUpa na ho to vaha logo ko mAyAvI athavA bhrama meM DAlane vAlA samajhA jaayegaa| jIvana kI saMgatatA kA sambandha veSa se nahIM hai para prAcAra se hai| AcAra jisakA saMgata hai, vaha manuSya prAmANika samajhA jAtA hai, cAhe usakA veSa kaisA hI ho / parantu jisane veSa hI ko apane jIvana kA mukhya AdhAra mAna liyA hai usako to apane veSa kI bAhya saMgatatA kA avazya khyAla rakhanA cAhiye / muha para muhapatti bAMdha kara aura hAya meM plAsTika ke mAvaraNa se acchAdita aoghA rakhate hue yuropa amarIkA ke vilAsI hATaloM meM jAkara ThaharanA, mujhe to yaha usa veSa ko bo viDambanA jaiso bAta lagatI hai / aise vyavahAra meM na mAcAra kI hI pragati mAlUma detI hai aura na vivAra ko ho pragati kA prAbhAsa hotA hai / maiMne sthAnaka vAsI sAdhu veSa kA parityAga isalie foyA ki mere vicAra usa veSa ke / mAcAra ke anurUpa saMgata nahI raha rahe the| isake bAda maiMne apanI viziSTa vidya-adhyayana kI AkAMkSA ko tRpta karane ke lie mUrtipUjaka sampradAya kA nUtana veSa paridhAna kiyA tathA usa sampradAya kI prayAnusAra pUrvAvasyA kA nAma badala kara 'jinavijaya aisA nUtana nAma bhI dhAraNa kiyaa| usI nAma se maiM aAja taka pahacAnA jA rahA hU~ / isa prakAra maiMne apane nUtana veSa aura nUtana nAma ke sAtha jIvana ke dUsare caraNa meM praveza kiyA aura koI bAraha varSa taka usa veSa meM rahA / ina varSoM meM maiMne yathA yoga ukta veSa aura sampradAya ke anusAra bhAva-pUrvaka prAcAra dhama kA pAlana karatA rahA / maiM kaI sthAnoM meM ghUmA, phirA aura apanA vidyAbhyAsa bar3hAtA rhaa| kucha zakti kA vikAsa hone para kaI prakAra kI dhArmika, sAmAjika, zaikSagika evaM sAhityika Adi pravRttiyoM meM bhI pravRtta rahA / ina sabakA varNana to jaba usa jAvana kA paricaya dene kA prasaMga AyegA, taba usakA pAlekhana hogA / yahA~ to maiM kevala isa mere parirvatana zIla jIvana ke vaise hI eka puna: veSa tyAga karane ke prasaMga kA sUcanA mAtra hI karanA cAhatA huuN| ukta prakAra se mUrtipUjaka sAdhu veSa meM rahate hue mujhe aneka prakAra ke naye vicAra prAne lage / sthAnakavAsI sAdhu jIvana meM vicAroM kA kSetra bahuta simita

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(8) mero jobana prapaMca kathA thA / para isa nUtana sAdhu jIvana meM vicAroM kA kSetra bahuta vistRta ho rahA thaa| unako lekara mano manthana bhI khUba hotA rhaa| maiM jIvana ke kisI vizAla kArya kSetra kI khoja meM lagane lagA anta meM mahAtmA gAMdhIjI ne san 1920 meM bhArata kI AjAdI ke lie aura aMgrejoM kI zAsana sattA ko ukhAr3a phekane ke lie dezavyApI jo asahakAra Andolana zurU kiyA, usameM sakriya sahayoga dene kA merA nirNaya humA / tadnusAra maiMne usa nUtana sAdhu veSa kA bhI parityAga kara diyaa| kyo aura kaise maha parityAga kiyA-isakI to bahuta bar3I lambI carcA hai, parantu saMkSepa meM, jaba maiMne rASTrIya Andolana meM juTa jAne kA dRr3ha vicAra kiyA, taba mujhe lagA ki apane svIkRta sAdhu veSa kA tyAga karake hI deza sevA kA kArya aMgIkRta karanA cAhiye / usa sAdhu dharma ke prAcArAnusAra merA deza sevA vAlA kArya saMgata nahIM lagatA thA / ataH maiMne svayaM mahAtmAjI ke sAtha isa viSaya meM vicAra vimarza kiyA tathA mere aneka vicAraka evaM vidvAna mitroM ke sAtha bho UhApoha kiyA / bAda meM maiMne akhabAroM meM apane veSa parivartana karane vAle vicAroM aura kAraNoM kA bhI prasiddhIkaraNa kiyA / yoM usa sampradAya meM merA kAphI sammAna thA / aneka vidvAn lekhaka, vicAraka evaM patrakAra mere ghaniSTa mitra the| kaI viSayoM ke praur3ha grantha maiMne sampAdita evaM prakAzita kiye the / ajaina vidvAnoM meM bhI merA acchA sammAnita sthAna bana gayA thA / zvetAmbara mpradAya ke vicArakoM ke atirikta digambara sampradAya ke tathA sthAnakavAsI sampradAya ke bhI kaI navIna vicAradhAraka bandhu mere prazaMsaka ho gaye the / aisI sthiti meM bhI jaba rASTra sevA ke kArya meM saMlagna hone kA merA dRr3ha vicAra huA to maiMne sAdhu dharma ke prAcAra ke sAtha usakI saMgatatA na samajhakara usa veSa kA parityAga karanA hI ucita smjhaa| tadnusAra maiM usa veSa ko utAra kara eka rASTrIya sevaka ke anurUpa khaddara kA lambA jhabbA pahana kara * mahAtmAjI ke sAtha bambaI se gAr3I meM baiTha gayA aura unake sAtha hI ahamadAbAda ke unake satyAgraha Azrama meM pahu~ca kara unhIM kI kuTiyA meM baiThakara maiMne apane veSa parivartana kA mAnasika aAnanda manAyA tathA mAtA kastUrabA ke puNya hAthoM se parosI gaI thAlI meM bhojana kara jIvana kI kRtArthatA kA ananya anubhava prApta kiyaa| yaha mere veSa parivartana kI dUsarI prapaMcAtmaka saMkSipta kathA hai / * noTa-usa samaya jaisA aneka rASTrIya sevaka khaddara kA maTIle raMga kA ghuTane taka lambA kurtA pahanA karate the vaisA hI maiMne apanA veSa svIkAra kiyaa| vahI veSa merA Ajanma rahA hai usake bAda, yuropa-gagana ke sivAya mujhe apane usa veSa meM kisI prakAra ke parivartana karane kI koI AvazyakatA nahIM huI /

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Tefer prastAvika usa parivartana ko bhI Aja 55 varSa jitanA samaya vyatIta ho gyaa| usa veSa meM maiM jaba taka rahA taba taka usa sampradAya evaM veSa ke anurUpa AcAra dharma kA yathA yogya pAlana karatA bahA / AhAra-vihAra Adi kI jo paripATI usa sampradAya meM sarva mAnya rUpa se pracalita tho, maiM bhI usakA anusaraNa barAbara karatA rahA / keza loca bhI niyamAnusAra karatA rahA / sadaiva pAdavihAra karatA rhaa| vAhana kA kabhI koI upayoga nahIM kiyA merI jijJAsA buddhi ko tRtta karane ke lie usa sampradAya meM bahuta kucha sAdhana the, isalie merA mAnasika utsAha hamezA bar3hatA hI gayA / aneka purAne grantha bhaNDAra mujhe dekhane ko mile, jinameM hajAroM prAcIna granthoM ke avalokana kA mujhe yatheSTa avasara milA / isalie merI mUla vidyAbhirUci kA yatheSTa paripoSa hotA rahA / parantu usa bAraha varSa ke kAla meM pichale 4-5 varSoM meM deza ko rAjakIya jAgRti meM, mahAtmA gAMdhI jI ke Agamana ke sAtha, jA nayo vicAra dhArA utpanna huI, usane mere krAMtipriya mana ko bhI Andolita karanA zurU kara diyaa| mere mana meM aba usa svarga loka kI prApti ko vaisI bhAvanA nahIM rahI, jo usake pUrva vAle sAdhu jIvana meM kAma kara rahI thI / mere dila meM deza kI svatantratA ke bhAva jAgRta hone lagI aura mahAtmA gAMdhIjI ke rASTrIya AMdolana ne una bhAvoM ko utta ejita karanA zurU kiyA / deza ke kaI krAMtikArI bandhutroM ko romAMcaka kahAniyA~ mere par3hane meM AyI / una vIroM ne deza kI svatantratA ke lie kisa prakAra prANoM kI AhutiyA~ taka dene kA mahAn tyAgavrata svIkAra kiyA, isakA manana karate hue mere dila meM bho deza kI svatantratA kI Aga sulagane lgii| maiMne jo sAdhu kA veSa pahana rakhA thA, usameM rahate hue maiM aise kiso krAtikArI mArga kA anusaraNa nahIM kara sakatA thA / aise aneka vicAroM ke kAraNa mujhe vaha veSa mana meM khaTakane lagA / mujhe lagane lagA ki apane svAtantrya prema ke lie aneka prakAra ke logoM kA samparka karanA cAhiye, aneka sthAnoM meM bhramaNa karanA cAhiye, jarUrata par3e to videzI bheSa pahana kara videzoM meM bhI jAnA cAhiye aura vahA~ ke jana jIvana kA pratyakSa anubhava karanA cAhiye / ye bAteM maiM prapane usa sAdhu veSa meM rahakara nahIM kara sakatA thA / isalie bahuta manomaMthana ke bAda usa sammAnAspada aura aneka janoM dvArA vandanIya mAne jAne vAle veSa kA parityAga karanA par3A / aisI hI kahAnI kahane vAlA merA yaha veSatyAga rUpa jIvana - prapatra kA parivartanAtmaka kiMcita varNana hai / pAThaka ise eka kSudra jIvana kI prasta-vyasta kathA ke sivAya usakA aura kucha mahatva na samajheM / inhIM paMktiyoM ke sAtha maiM apanA kiMcit prastAvika samApta karatA hU~ / mAgha zuklA 14 vi0 saM0 2032, dinAMka 14-2-76 ( e) munijanavijaya nivAsa sarvodaya Azrama canderiyA (cittaur3agar3ha)

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prata da kisI ajJAta lakSa kI khoja meM, calatA rahA meM sArA jIvana, pA na sakA kahIM meM usako khinnahIM rahA hai merA mana, jAnA cAhatA hUM aba anya loka meM, lekara usI mAzA ko sAtha, AzA mamara hai-isalie maiMne, usakA pakar3A pakkA hAtha. aMtanimagna hokara jaba maiM, socatA hai jIvana kA atIta bhamaNA maya baiSamya suroM kA, sunatA hUM kucha agamya saMgIta / bhUlA phirA maiM ajAta jaMgala meM, jIvana sArA kisI durAzA meM mRgatRSNAvava vaha AzA nikalI, nizceSTa ho soOM nirAzA meM.

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eka abodha jIvana ko, ajJAnAvasthA meM, kI gaI lakSahIna sAdhanA kA kucha varNana karane vAlI merI jIvana prapaMca kathA muni jinavijaya

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava viSayAnukrama krama pRSTha naMbara 1 // 4 20 22 RK mmmmm 1 sAdhu veSa kI pahalI rAta 2 digThANa se prasthAna - dhArakA prathama cAturmAsa 3 DaoN. zrIdhara bhAMDArakara se milana aura prAcIna lipi ke jJAna kI jijJAsA 4 jaina sAdhuoM ke prAcAra viSayaka kucha vicAra 5 indaura zahara kA varNana 6 devAsa kA paricaya 7 ujjaina meM cAturmAsa 8 ujjaina ke eka udAra-cetA nagara seTha kA varNana & ujjaina ke cAturmAsa meM eka vicitra ghaTanA kA anubhava 10 keza lucana viSayaka kucha vicAra 11 mahAkAlezvara ke maMdira kA darzana 12 ujjaina se dakSiNa deza kI aora vihAra 13 indaura meM munnAlAlajI ke bhAI kA vicitra prasaMga 14 indaura se prasthAna 15 sAdhu jIvana kI caryA kI kucha carcA 16 satapur3A ke jaMgala kA ugra vihAra 17 cAlIsa gAMva meM mUrti pUjaka sAdhu kA darzana 18 vAghalI se ahamadanagara kI ora vihAra 16 vArI gAMva kA paricaya 20 vArI gAMva kA cAturmAsa 21 vArI gAMva meM ajJAta zikSaka se svalpa samAgama 22 eka hindu sanyAsinI kA Agamana 23 bhusAvala se mAlave kI tarapha prayANa 24 ujjaina kA cAturmAsa aura mere usa veSa kA visarjana KW.MG . 48 ur 0. m m *

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merI jIvana prapaMca kathA muni jinavijaya likhita jIvana-kathA kA uttara bhAga nirlakSya jIvana bItA merA, pAyA na kucha maiMne tatva vishess| AyA jyoMhI jA rahA hUM jagata se, pAra cinA dRSTi unmeSa / -svAnubhUti sthAnakavAsI sampradAyakA jIvanAnubhava pUrva prakAzita jIvana-kathA ko lagabhaga 5 varSa vyatIta hone jA rahe haiM / usa samaya khayAla thA ki kucha samaya bAda Age kA kathA-prasaMga li banA prAraMbha kara diyA jAyagA para isa bIca kaI anyAnya kAraNa upasthita hote gaye aura mana likhane meM utsuka nahIM rhaa| boca meM kaI bhAiyoM ke patra bho Ate rahe ki maiM apanI jIvana-kathA kA agalA bhAga pAlekhita karU~, para manameM isa kathA ko likhane ke liye vaisA koI utsAha pragaTa nahIM huaa| ___ isa boca merA svAsthya dina pratidina adhika kSINa hotA gayA aura mujhe apane jIvana ke viSaya meM koI vizeSatA kA bhAva anubhava na huA / isa varSa ke pichale kaI mahInoM mujhe apane ahamadAbAda vAle sthAna meM rahane kA prasaMga upasthita huA / vahA~ para bhI kaI mitroM ne prAkara isa kathA ke Age kA varNana likha DAlane kA Agraha kiyaa| kucha mitroM ne to kahA ki yadi maiM likhavAnA cAhU~ to ve isa kAma ke liye apanA samaya bhI dene ko taiyAra haiM / eka acche gujarAtI lekhaka to niyamita rUpa se pAkara mujhase jIvana-kathA ke bhinna bhinna prasaMgoM kA lekara prazna pUchane lage aura maiM unakA uttara yathA smaraNa likhavAtA rahA / yo prAyaH eka mahIne taka yaha krama calatA rahA aura unhoMne koI 200, 300 pRSThoM jitanA meTara likha DAlA parantu yaha kAma gujarAtI bhASA meM huA /

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(2) merI jovana prapaMca kathA bAda meM pichale julAI mahIne ke anta meM ahamadAbAda se merA yahAM canderiyA meM 25 varSa pahale sthApita apane sarvodaya sAdhanA Azrama meM AnA huA / yahA~ pAne ke bAda merA svAsthya acAnaka bahuta kucha bigar3A sA anubhava hone lagA / jIvana kA samApana aba zIghra hone jA rahA hai aisA kucha AbhAsa bhI hone lgaa| svAbhAvika hI maiM bichaune meM par3e par3e jIvana kA siMhAvalokana karane lagA / jovana kA vaise pravAsa kAla to bahuta lambA hai| pUre 75 varSa se bhI adhika samaya taka maiM calatA rahA phira bhI kisI sthAna aura kisI lakSya para sthira hokara nahIM baiThA / isa dIrgha kAlIna pravAsa meM aneka choTe bar3e viziSTha vyaktiyoM ke samparka meM Ane kA avasara milA / ina vyaktiyoM ke samparkakAlIna saMsmaraNoM kA vizAla punja mere isa choTe se mana meM itanA bharA huA hai jinakI ginatI karanA bhI azakya sA laga rahA hai / yoM to prakRti ke niyamAnusAra yaha smaraNa puja isa mana ke vilIna hone ke sAtha ho kSaNa bhara meM vinaSTa ho jAyagA; parantu jaba taka yaha mana kucha kriyAzIla banA rahatA hai taba taka ina saMsmaraNoM ko bAhara pheMka denA bhI zakya nahIM ho rahA hai / isa khayAla se ina dinoM merA mana phira thor3A sA usa adhUrI jIvana-kayA ke sambandha meM jitanA kucha likhA jA sake utanA likhane ko aba pravRtta ho rahA hai na mAlUma kaba taka aura kahA~ taka yaha kathA pAge calegI / sAdhu keSa kI pahalI rAta aba maiM jIvana ke usa dina kA phira smaraNa karanA cAhatA hUM, jisa dina maiMne digThANa ke usa bagIce meM sAdhuveza pahane pahalI rAta vyatIta kI ! hA~, to Azvina zuklA kI yaha trayodazI kI rAta hai / AkAza meM cAMdanI chiTaka rahI hai / zarad kAlIna zubhra AkAza apanI divya prabhA se prakAzita ho rahA hai / dharatI mAtA hare bhare khetoM aura jaMgaloM se ullasita ho rahI hai / aisI hI eka rAta sukhAnandajI meM jaba kizana bhairava ke rUpa meM usa vizAla vaTa vRkSa ke cauMtare para mRgachAla para baiThA hayA aura sAre zarIra para bhabhUta lagAye OM namaH zivAya, OM namaH zivAya kA matra mana meM jApa karatA hA jisa manobhAva kA anubhava kiyA-usakA varNana usa sthAna para kiyA hai / Aja jIvana meM phira kisI anya mArga para calane kA nayA prayAsa zurU ho rahA hai| Aja maiMne kizanalAla ke ve saba purAne kapaDe-jo sAmAnya kartA aura choTIsI dhotI jitane the, unako zarIra para se utAra pheMkA aura usakI jagaha

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava eka caddara aura cola paTTA pahana kara jamIna para kucha garama Una kA kaMbala sA pichaunA bichA kara baiThA hamA apane Apako dekha rahA hai| muha para eka paTTI bAMdhalI hai- jo jIvana meM pahale kabhI nahIM bAMdhI tho / yaha jarUra aTapaTI sI laga rahI hai| jo caddara mujhe prauDhane ke liye do gaI vaha kisI khAsa kisma ke laThTha kI thI aura usa para hIMgalU Adi kaI prakAra ke raMgoM se svastika aAdi citrAvalI kI gaI thii| sthAnakavAsI sampradAya ke zAyada usa pradeza ke bhAiyoM meM yaha prathA thI ki nava dIkSita hAne vAle bhAI ko jo pahalI caddara praur3hAI jAya, vaha isa prakAra ke citra vicitra ragoM se maMDita ho / anya pradeza ke sAdhuoM ke liye yaha prathA thI yA nahIM isakA mujhe koI jJAna nahIM hai / maiM jarUra kaI mahInoM taka usI caddara ko maur3a kara sthAnaka se bAhara jAtA rahA, yahA~ taka ki jaba taka vaha jIrNa hokara phaTa nahIM gaI / - hA~, to maiM usa rAta usI caddara ko praur3ha kara tIna cAra ghaNTe soyA rahA-pAsa meM tapasvIjo bhI soye the / zyAma ko unhoMne pratikramaNa kA pATha sunAyA aura kucha palathI mAra kara baiThe hue kAyotsarga karanA bhI sikhAyA / phira namo arihaMtANam kI ekAdha mAlA japa kara so jAne kA Adeza diyA / maiM so gayA, parantu apane svAbhAvika caMcala mana ke kAraNa pUrva kI kucha ghaTanAoM kA smaraNa hone lgaa| phira vahI bAta,yAja dina meM kitane ThATha bATa ke sAtha hAthI para baiTha kara yaha nUtana sAdhu veza dhAraNa karane ke liye digThANa gAMva se julUsa ke rUpa meM hajAroM bhAI bahinoM ke sAtha beMDabAjoM kI dhuna sunatA huA-mAnoM kisI rAjakumAra kA rAja tilaka hone jA rahA hai aisA nATakIya dRzya kA anubhava karatA huA bagIce meM utarA aura ghaNTe bhara meM vaha saba nATakIya veza aura nATakIya ThATa bATa adRzya ho gayA aura maiM isa prakAra isa cAdanI ko zutra pulakita rAtri meM eka Amra vRkSa ke nIce mAmUlA sA bichaunA vichA kara nidrA leo kA vyartha prayAsa kara rahA huuN| bhaNa bhara meM rUpAhelI aura mAtA rAjakumArI kA smaraNa ho paayaa| gurUdevI hapano kA bhI smaraNa ho pAyA / bAda meM sukhAnaMdajI meM bhairavI dIkSA dene vAle khAvI bAbA zivA nadajI kA bhI smaraNa ho pAyA kisa taraha ujjaina kI usa ziprA nadI ke taTa vAle una maTha meM se jAna bacAne ke liye vaha cimaTA, vaha kamaNDala pheMka kara gupa cupa eka kurtA pahana kara nikala bhAgA / phira ghUmatA phiratA kaise badanAvara pahu~cA aura vahA se usa mahAjana dampati ke sasarga se digThAga tapasvI jI mahArAja ke darzana karane calA pAyA aura kucha hI dinoM meM vaha sArA nATa samApta kara prAja isa rAta meM baiThA huA apane bhaviSya ke kisI ajJAta mArga meM calane ko nikala par3A / dUsare dina prAtaHkAla hote hI zaucAdi kriyA se nivRtta hokara hama ,digThANa gAMva vAle sthAna meM jAkara sthira hokara rahane lage / sAdhu jIvana kI caryA kA Aja se prArambha humA /

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( 4 ) merI jIvana prapaMca ko kyoMki maiM bilkula isa caryA se anabhijJa aura aparicita thA digThANa ke sthAnaka meM jAkara jaise hI hama baiThe, vaise hI saikaDoM jaina bhAI bahina sAdhuoM ko vaMdanAdi karane ko pAne lage / saMba hI mujhe kutuhala se dekha rahe the / kala zAma taka maiM kisa deza meM digANa kI galiyoM meM cUma rahA thA aura kisa taraha merA rAjazAho ThATha vATa se dikSA mahotsava kA julUsa nikalA aura maiM bahumUlya jarI ke kapar3e pahana kara hAthI ke hode para baiThA huA digThANa ke bAjAra meM nikalA aura hajAroM kI saMkhyA meM tA~be ke paine hAtho ke hode para baiThA maiM idhara udhara khar3e logoM para uchAlatA rahA, Adi vicitra dRzya una saba bhAI bahinoM kI A~khoM ke sAmane nAca rahA thaa| vahI kizanalAla Aja ATha baje isa sthAnaka meM sAdhu veza pahane hue eka choTe se pATa para baiThA baiThA sikuDa rahA thA / bhAI, bahina, lar3ake lar3akiyAM ityAdi jo kucha mujhe una yor3e dinoM meM bahuta paricita ho gaye the, aba kaiyoM kA to maiM mere sAtha kucha prAtmIya sA bhI jama gayA thA / ve mujhe aba bar3o kutUhala ko dRSTi se dekhane lage aura nIce jhuka jhuka kara mujhe namaskAra bho karane lge| kucha eka do bahineM jo mere sAtha atyanta vAtsalya bhAva rakhane laga gaI thI, unako A~khoM meM to kucha A~su se bhI Aye mAlUma diye / ___ samaya hone para tapasvI jI mahArAja ne vyAkhyAna denA zurU kiyaa| gAMva vAle tathA dIkSA mahotsava ke nimitta bAhara se Ane vAle bhAI bahina bhI bar3I saMkhyA meM vyAkhyAna sunane ko upasthita hue| digThANa kA vaha sthAnaka choTAsA hI thA / vAstava meM vaha sthAnaka nahIM thA, parantu kisI mahAjana kI eka bar3o sI dukAna tho, usI meM tapasvIjI mahArAja ne cAturmAsa ke liye nivAsa kiyA thaa| dIkSA prasaMga para jaba aneka logoM ke Ane kI saMbhAvanA ko lakSa meM-lekara usa sthAnaka ke Age kA jo khAsA caur3A sA bAjAra kA rAstA thA-usa para kanAta vagairaha bA~dha kara logoM ke baiThane kI vyavasthA karadI thI / - usa dina ke bhojanoparAnta prAMgatuka bhAI bahina apane apane gAMva jAne vAle the, ve saba vyAkhyAna meM upasthita hue aura prasaMgAnusAra gAMva ke aura bAhara vAle kaI bhAgyavAna zrAvakoM ne nAriyala, laDa. per3e, batAse. bAdAma, chuhAre Adi vastuoM kI pur3iyA bA~dha bA~dha kara vyAkhyAna sunane vAle bhAI bahinoM lar3ake lar3akiyoM ko dharma prabhAvanA ke khayAla se samarpita kI / isa prakAra eka eka bhAI ke pAsa koI tona2 cAra2 kilo vajana vAlo ye saba cIjeM ho gii| vyAkhyAna ke bAda gAMva vAloM kI ora se sabako sAmUhika bhojana diyA gayA / jisameM 'kaI prakAra kI acchI 2 miThAiyAM Adi parosI gaI thI / zAma taka loga apane apane gAMva cale

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smAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ( 5 ) gye| yoM mere liye vaha sArA dina khUba vyasta sA rahA / gocarI ke samaya eka sAdhu AhAra lene gayA / vaha hama sAdhugnoM ke yogya Avazyaka AhAra le AyA aura hama saba sAdhunoM ne eka sAtha baiTakara pAhAra kiyA / AhAra ke liye jaisA ki sAdhunoM ke pAsa kASTha ke bane hue choTe bar3e tIna cAra pAtra hote haiM, unhI meM yaha aAhAra kiyA jAtA hai| mero dIkSA nimita zrAvakoM ne mere liye tIna cAra naye kASTha pAtroM kA eka seTa sAdhuoM ko bheMTa kara diyA thaa| tapasvIjI ne unhIM pAtroM meM mere khAne yogya do eka roTI, kucha sabjI, dAla jaisI pravAhI cIjeM mere pAtra meM rakhadI / pAhAra ke samaya muMha patti kholakara pAsa meM rakhado jAtA hai / maine bhI pahale dina daMkSA grahaNa karate samaya jo muha patti mukha para bAMdhI thI. isa samaya khola kara pAma meM rakha dI, manameM bahuta aTapaTA sA laga rahA thaa| choTe se pAtroM meM jo kucha khAne yogya roTo Adi thI usako maiMne jaldI jaldI khaalii| bacapana se ho mero aAdata khAne ke samaya jaldI jalado vA lene ko raho hai / mujhe jaldI jaldI grAsa khAte hue dekhakara tapasvojI ne kahA-dhore dhore khA ! AhAra meM zrAvaka logoM ne bahuta prAgraha pUrvaka kucha miSThAnna Adi baherAye, parantu sAdhu ke prAcAra mutAbika jitanA anna khAyA jA sake utanA ho anna grahaga karane kI vidhi hai / kiMcit mAtra bhI adhika khAdya vastu nahIM lI jAtI, kyoMki sAdhu ko pAtra meM ucchiSTha rakhane kA niSedha hai aura kicit mAtra bho bace hue ko bAhara pheMkane kI manAI hai / kabhI kArya vaza aisA anna pAtra meM adhika yA jAya aura vaha pUrA nahIM khAyA jAya to use bAhara jaMgala meM jAkara miTTI aAdi ke nIce dabA denA par3atA hai| jaina sAdhunoM kI bha SA meM ise paraTha denA kaho haiN| kiMcit mAtra bhI kisI prakAra kI khAdya sAmagrI rAta ke liye apane pAsa rakha nahIM skte| yaha sarva vidita bAta hai ki jaina sAdhu na kabhI sUryAsta ke bAda anna le sakatA hai na pAnI hI po sakatA hai| rAta ke liye jaina sAdhu ko kisI bhI prakAra kA asana aura pAna arthAt khAnA khAnA aura jala pInA sarvathA niSiddha hai| ... . isI taraha rAta ko apane sthAnaka se bAhara jAnA bho niSiddha hai| yoM jaina sAdhunoM kA prAcAra--mArga eka prakAra se bahuta kaThina samajhA jAtA hai| mujhe aba isa AvAra mArga kA jJAna prApta karanA thA aura tadnusAra usakA pAlana karane kA bhI abhyAsa karanA thaa| dUsare dina Azvina zukla pUrNimA thI tapasvI jI ne usI dina se mujhe kucha par3hAne kA muhUrta kiyA / jaisA ki usa sampradAya ke sAdhuoM kI par3hAI kI paripATI hai-tadanusAra mujhe tapasvIz2o ne sarva prathama

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( 6 ) dazavekAlika - sUtra kA mUla pATha kaMThastha karane ko kahA usa samama isa sUtra kI koI chapI huI pustaka nahIM thA / eka sau Der3haso barasa purAno hAtha kI likhI huI potho unake pAsa thI usakA pahalA pannA nikAla kara mere hAtha meM rakhA aura kahA ki isa patra meM pahale pahala jo pA~ca gAthAe~ likhI huI haiM unako kaMThastha karo / unhoMne svayaM ve pA~ca gAthAe~ vola kara mujhe sunAI aura 'tupa baiThera isa taraha ina pAMca gAvAtroM kA yAda karo' - - aisA kahA / merI jIvana prapaMtra kathA merA akSara bodha kA jJAna usa samaya ThIka ThIka thA jisase maiM svayaM usa patra meM likhI huI una pA~coM gAyAtroM kA dhIre se par3a gayA aura koI do ghaNToM meM ekAMta meM baiThe hue maiMne una pA~coM gAthAoM kA kaThastha kara liyA / merA kucha zabdoccAra ThIka thaa| pahale ho maiMne gurUvirya yAti zrI devIsajI ke pAsa isa prakAra ke kucha jaina stotra paDhe hue the jisase mujhe ina pAMca gAthAoM ko kaThastha karane meM koI kaThinAI anubhava nahIM huI / jisa sUtra kI ye prathama pA~ca gAthAoM maiMne par3hI, usa sUtra kA nAma dazavaikAlika sUtra hai ! jaina sAhitya meM arthAt jaina - zrAgamoM meM yaha eka choTA sA mahatva kA grAgama-grantha hai / isa Agama grantha meM kula milA kara dasa adhyayana haiM aura saba milA kara jinakA gAyA prabhAga 700 jitanA hai| jaina sAdhu paramparA ke anusAra jo koI nava dIkSita hotA hai-use sabase pahale yaho zrAgama-grantha paThanA hotA hai / usa Agama grantha meM jaina sAdhu ko jIvana meM pAlane yogya sabhI mukhya muruSa prAvAroM kA varNana hai / jisa sampradAya meM maiMne navIna dIkSA dhAraNa kI, usameM yaha prathA mukhya rUpa se pracalita thI / anya jaina sAdhu sampradAyoM meM aisA kucha nizcita vyavahAra mAlUma nahIM detA / zvetAmbara-pUrti pUjaka sampradAya meM nava dokSita hone vAle sAdhu ke paThana-pAThana kA krama anya DhaMga se hai / Upara jo ca gAthAeM maiMne usa dina kaMTastha karalI vaha dazavaikAlika kA utanI hI gAthAoM vAlA choTA sA prathama adhyayana hai / isakA prathama vAkya jo Aja bhagavAna mahAvora dvArA pravalita jaina dharma ke ahiMsA, saMyama aura tapa ina tIna mUlabhUta siddhAntoM kA nidezaka hai / isakA prathama vAkya 'dhammo maMgala mukkiTTham hiMsA saMyama tavo' aisA hai isameM sUcita kiyA gayA hai- ahiMsA, saMyama aura tapa ye hI dharma ke utkRSTa aura maMgalamaya tatva haiM / inhIM ahimA, saMyama aura tapa kA AcaraNa jaina sAdhu kA kisa taraha jIvana meM pAlana karanA cAhiye / isakA vistAra pUrvaka varNana isa dazavekAlika zrAgama grantha meM kiyA gayA hai / ataH yaha grAgama grantha jaina sAdhu ko avazya par3anA caahiye| maiMne bhI tadnusAra usa dina se isa sUtra ko pUrA kaMThastha kara lene kA upakrama cAlU kiyA /

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (7) cUki isa sUtra kI bhASA prAkRta hai aura nava dIkSita ko usa bhASA kA koI paricaya nahIM hotA / isaliye mUla sUtra ke par3ha jAne se to sUtragata bAtoM kA jJAna nahIM hotA / isa sUtra kA ThIka ThIka rahasya jAnane ke liye to prAkRta bhASaNa ke vizeSa jJAna kI prAzkatA hoto hai, parantu sUtra pATha so kaMThastha kara lene ke bAda usakA artha samajhanA Avazyaka hotA hai / aura vaha artha usa jamAne kI pracalita lokabhASA meM likhA rahatA hai isaliye isa lokabhASA dvArA sUtra kA artha samajhane kA nUtana dIkSita jaina sAdhu prayatna karate rahate haiM / yoM pIche se mujhe kucha adhyayana karane ke bAda mAlUma huA ki-isa sUtra para to zrI haribhadra. sUri jaise mahAna zAstrakAroM ne saMskRta bhASA meM bar3I bar3I TIkAe~ likhI haiM / para vaha to mujhe bahuta varSoM bAda jJAna hA unako ina bAtoM kA koI jJAna nahIM thA / ve mujhe sUtra kA artha samajhAne ke liye pura/no lokabhASA meM likhe hue artho kA dhIre dhIre manana karate rahanA cAhiye-aisA kahA karate yaha to mujhe yAda nahIM hai ki una tapasvI jI ko isa sUtra kA ThIka2 artha jJAta thA yA nhiiN| mujhase pahale jo mere jitanI ho AyuSya vAle eka bAlaka ne dIkSA lelI yI, vaha usa samaya usa sUtra kA kucha prAge kA pATha baiThA baiThA kaThastha kiyA karatA thaa| usa samaya taka isa satra ke prathama cAra adhyAya usane kaMThastha kara liye the| usake sAtha sAtha jaina sthAnakavAso sAdhu sampradAya meM jo paThana pAThana kA krama hai-tadnusAra jinako thokar3A zabda se pahacAne jAte haiM vaise purAnI loka bhASA meM grathita choTe bar3e aneka saMgraha kiye hue haiM unakA bhI sAtha sAtha adhyayana kiyA jAtA hai / ina thokar3A zabda se paricita prakaraNoM meM jaina-grAgamoM meM varNita vicAroM, prAcAroM aura tatvoM kA sAra saMkalita karane , kA prayatna kiyA gayA hai| mUrti pUjaka sampradAya meM una thokar3oM ke par3hane kA pracAra nahIM hai / isa sampradAya vAle thAkaDoM jaise hI jaina-zAstroM ke sAra samajhAne vAle prAkRta bhASA meM choTe choTe svatantra prakaraNa - grantha milate haiM-jinameM jaina dharma ke jIva ajIva Adi sabhI tatvoM ke sAra saMkalita haiM-unhIM kA mUrti pUjaka sampradAya meM dIkSita vyakti kA adhyayana karAyA jAtA hai / 'jIva-vicAra. navatatva prakaraNa, daMDaka prakaraNa Adi aise kaI prakaraNa-grantha haiM jo kama se par3he par3hAye jAte haiM / sthAnakavAsI sampradAya meM yaha prakaraNa-granya mAnya nahIM haiM, kyoMki inake vanAne vAle prAcArya bahuta pAche ke samaya meM hue haiM / ataH ve pramANa-bhUta grantha nahIM mAne jaate| isIliye sthAnakavAsI sampradAya meM dazavakAlika uttarAdhyayana, prAcArAMga sUtra Adi mUla pAgamAM ke paThana-pAThana kI prathA rahI hai| . jisa samaya maiM dIkSita huA usa samaya sthAnakavAsI sampradAya meM saMskRta bhASA ke adhyayana kA

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(8) merI jIvana prapaMca kA vyavahAra yA pracAra nahIM thA / koI gine hue bar3e sAdhu kucha saMskRta bhASA jAnane vAle haiM aisA maiMne sunA thA, parantu merA vaise sAdhu se usa avasthA meM kabhI kAI milApa nahIM huA / ___mero buddhi kucha caMcala thI, isaliye maiMne koI eka mahine meM dazavakAlika sUtra ke prathama ke cAra adhyAya kaMThastha kara liye the| sAtha meM kucha kucha thokar3oM ka pATha bhI karatA rahatA thA / usa samaya koI bhI chapI huI pustaka na maiMne dekhI paura na mere hAtha meM ho pAI / yoM dIkSita hone ke bAda eka mahinA hama digThANa meM rahe / kArtika pUrNimA ke dina caturmAsa kA samaya samApta ho gayA aura usake dUsare hI dina hamane digThANa se bihAra kara diyA / digThANa se prasthAna dhAra kA prathama vartumAsa digThANa se cale bAda kucha gAMvoM meM hote hue mAlave kI usa itihAsa prasiddha dhArA nagarI kA nAma maiMne bacapana meM hI apane mAtA pitA Adi kuTumbI janoM se suna rakhA thaa| merA janma paramAra nAmaka rAjapUta kula meM huA thA aura una paramAroM kI dhArAnagarI mukhya rAjadhAnI thii| itihAsa prasiddha ye bAta mere bacapana se ho antara meM kahIM chupI huI thii| merI mAtA rAjakuvara jo aisI purAnI bAteM jAnane vAlI thI, usake muMha se kaI daphA dhAra aura rAjAbhoja kI kahAnI Adi sunane ko milI, isaliye dhArA nagaro dekhane kA aba jIvana meM avasara pA rahA hai yaha jAnakara merA mana utsaka ho rahA thA / koI7,8 dina bAda hama dhAra pahu~ce / dhAra usa samaya mAlave kA svatantra sTeTa thaa| saMyoga vaza vahA~ rAjAjI paramAra vaza ke rAjapUta kula ke the, parantu ve mUla meM mahArASTra nivAsI the aura musalamAnoM ke yuga meM unhoMne zAyada marAThA pezAvAoM ke samaya meM mahArASTra ke pezavA zAsakoM ke samaya ina logoM ne dhAra ko apane kabje meM le liyA thaa| choTA sA hI sTeTa thaa| hama jaba dhAra ke pAsa pahuMce to usake prAsapAsa kI choTI choTI pahAr3iyAM--unake bIca meM bane hue pAnI ke kaI choTe bar3e tAlAba mAdi se vaha pradeza mujhe bar3A sundara mAlUma diyaa| dhAra meM isa sampradAya vAle zrAvakoM ne acchA sA dharma sthAnaka banA rakhA thA / dhAra meM rahane vAle zrAvaka loga adhikatara poravAla jAti ke vaizya the

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sthAnakavAsI saMbavAya kA jIvanAnubhava paura unameM do cAra para amche mAladAra samajhe jAle the| ye saba zrAvaka tapasvI jI ke sampradAya ke anurAgo the| isaliye lapasvI jI mujha jaise eka nava dIkSita bAlaka sAdhu ko sAtha lekara dhAra pahuMce to zrAvakoM ne unakI bar3I prAva bhagata ko| niyamAnusAra hama loga sthAnaka meM Thahara game / . sthAnaka eka acchA sA purAnA makAna thA aura usameM eka tarapha tona bAra kamare bhI para kI maMjIla para bane hue the| sthAnaka kI racanA dekhakara merA mana kucha prasanna huaa| hara sAdhu loga roja subaha zauca ke liye gAMva ke bAhara kahIM dUra nirjana pradeza meM cale jAte the / pAsapAsa kI choTo choTI pahAr3iyoM ke irda girda do tona acche bar3e tAlAba bane hue the| unakI pAla para hokara zaucAdi ke liye jAnA pAnA mujhe bar3A acchA lagatA thaa| eka tarapha eka choTI kI pahAr3I para cAmuMDA devI kA mandira thA jahA~ devI ke upAsaka saikar3oM loga niyamita prAve jAte rahate the| vAyada koI eka mahinA taka hama dhAra meM ruke / tapasvo jI hamezA subaha ghaNTA prAdhA ghaNTA bhAkhyAna diyA karate the| jisako sunane ke liye gAMva ke viziSTha bhAI bahina a yA karate the| prama vyAkhyAna ke samaya maiMne dhAra hI meM sarva prathama eka naI prathA dekhI / vyAkhyAna ke anta meM kucha bhAI bahina stavana yA sajjhAya rUpa eka do gIta gAyA karate the / eka dina bhAI gAte the the. dUsare dina bahineM gAtI thii| ye bhAI bahina vahA ke dhanavAna jana kuTumboM ke the / striyoM meM khAsa paLa kA vyavahAra nahIM dekhA yaha kuTumba tapasvI jI ke gurU rAmaratana nI mahArAja kA saMkita ho bhakta kuTumna thA / zrI rAmaratanajo mahArAja ne dhAra meM kaI cAturmAsa kiye the / bAda meM ve ujjaina meM jAkara sthira vAsa karake rahane lage / zAyada tapasvI jI bho bahuta varSoM bAda dhAra prAye the / isaliye ina zrAvakoM kA una para vizeSa anurAga thaa| maiM usa sampradAya meM eka nava pIkSipta sAdhu thA / mero cha'To hI umra tho / kucha par3hate karane meM ruci vAlA thA / isaliye usa kuTumba ke kucha saMskArI yuvaka aura bahineM masara mere pAsa Akara baiThA karate the / yadyapi sesako isa bAta kA koI prAbhAsa nahIM milA ki maiM dIkSita hone ke pahale kima avasthA meM kahAM raha cukA hai| mujhe to loga eka brAhmaga kA eka anAtha sA lar3akA samajhA karate the, parantu maiMne jaina dIkSA lelI aura maiM Age cala kara eka acchA nAmI sAdhu bana maga-isa kalpanA se ve kucha prasanna rahate the| prAhAra ke liye hamezA tapasvI jI ke bar3e ziSya analadAsajI aura munnAlAlaz2I jAnA karate the| eka dina usa panika kuTumba kI mukhiyA avikA jisake / toca putra, patravadhue~ tathA putriyAM Adi kA acchA bar3A parivAra yA aura vaha kuTumba dhAra meM sabase adhika sampanna

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mero jIvana prapaMca kathA . . . mahAjana the-kuTumba ke rUpa meM prasiddha thA aura ve lena dena prAdi kA bar3A vyavasAya karate the| zahara meM sabase bar3e lakhapati prAsAmI samajhe jAte the / mukhiyA zrAvikA ne kahA ki tapasI jI mahArAja Apa apane naye cele ke sAtha hamArA ghara pAvana karane pdhaareN| : eka dina tapasI jI mujhe sAtha lekara usake ghara gaye / mere hAtha meM jholI thI. aura usameM do tIna kASTha pAtra the| zrAvikA ne bAdAma, piste, drAkSA, chuhAre prAdi mevoM ke bhare hue thAla meM se thor3e thor3e dAne mere pAtra meM beharAye phira vaha apanI kucha samRddhi dikhAne kI dRSTi se Upara vAle kamare meM hamako legaI. usa kamare meM jagaha jagaha sonA cAMdI Adi ke jevara alaga alaga roM ke rUpa meM rakhe hue the| koI pacAsoM kI saMsthA meM ve Dhera the| maiM to Azcarya cakita hokara unake sAmane mugdha bhAva se dekhatA rahA / merI samajha meM nahIM AyA ki yaha kyA tamAzA hai / tapasI jI bhI usI taraha kucha Azcarya bhAva se dekhate rahe. phira unhoMne dhIre se pUchA seThAnI jI yaha saba kyA hai / ina kImatI jevaroM ko isa taraha kyoM khule rakha chor3e haiN| koI saMdUka bakse Adi nahIM hai - jinameM yaha rakhe raheM / taba seThAnI ne kahA ki mahArAja sA. ye saba jevara hamAre alaga alaga prAsAmiyoM ke haiM jinako hama unakI AvazyakatAnusAra rupaye byAja se dete rahate haiM aura java unakA kAma ho jAtA hai taba ve pAkara maya byAja ke hamAre rupaye de jAte haiN| una rupayoM kI evaja meM ve loga pAsa ke sonA cAMdI Adi ke jo jevara hote haiM hamAre pAsa rakha jAte haiM / hama unako eka patra banAkara likha dete haiM ki itane vajana ke itane jevara aAja tumane hamAre yahAM rakhe haiM aura hamane isakI evaja meM tumako mAMge hue itane rupaye diye haiM / jaba rupaye vApasa kara doge taba ye rakameM tuma lauTA lenaa| isa taraha pacAsoM AsAmiyoM ke ye jevara Adi haiM baksoM meM hama isako kahAM aura kaise rakheM, isaliye inako Upara vAle kamare meM rakha chor3e haiM Adi / dekha suna kara hama vahAM se apane sthAnaka meM cale Aye, dhAra ke usa zrAvaka kuTumba ke ghara meM jo yaha bAta maiMne dekhI vaha mere mana meM sadA ke liye aMkita ho gii| kyoM ki san 1857 meM hue aMgrejoM ke viruddha vAle balve ne jisake ThikANe kA sarvanAza ho gayA thA usa rAjapUta gharAne ke bilkula eka darida kutumba meM janmA huA aura jIvana ke 15 varSa jaise bAlyakAla meM jisa taraha vyatIta hue -unameM aise kabhI kisI dhanika kudumba ke ghara kI dekhane kI koI kalpanA hI nahIM ho sakatI thii| - dhAra ke viSaya meM aura vahAM ke paramAra vaMzIya rAjA bhoja prAdi ko kucha kahAniyA~ maiMne apanI bhASA tathA yatiyoM ke sahavAsa meM rahate hue suna rakhI thI, para usakA koI vizeSa jJAna mujhe nahIM thaa| dhAra jaba hama gaye taba mana meM kucha tarka huA thA ki yaha vahI dhArA nagarI hai jisakI kucha kahAniyAM

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava suna rakhI thI, parantu isakA khulAsA milane kA koI sambhava nahIM huA / eka dina eka zrAvaka kA lar3akA jo zAyada skUla meM 8 vIM kakSA meM par3ha rahA hogA. vaha mere pAsa Akara baiTha gyaa| maiMne yoM hI usase pUchA ki tuma kyA karate ho to usane kahA ki maiM skUla meM par3ha rahA huuN| mere bApa rAjakIya kisI kacaharI meM naukarI karate haiN| maiMne pUchA- skUla meM kyA kyA bAteM par3hAI jAtI haiM to usane gaNita. itihAsa, bhUgola Adi kI kucha bAteM khiiN| lekina ye merI samajha ke bAhara kI bAteM thI. phira maiMne yUhI jijJAsA se pUchA ki skUla meM tumako yaha koI bAta par3hAI gaI ki isa dhArA nagarI meM rAjA bhoja Adi kaba ho gaye ? taba usane kahA ki hameM bhUgola kI eka kitAba par3hAI jAto hai jisameM yaha dhArA nagarI kisane basAI aura rAjA bhoja Adi kaba ho gaye, usakA kucha varNana usameM diye gaye pATha meM par3hA hai / maiMne kahA -vaha kitAba tere pAsa ho to lAnA, meM usako par3hanA cAhatA huuN| dUsare dina bhUgola kI vaha phaTI huI purAnI pustaka usane lAkara mujhe dI, usameM dhAra aura rAjA bhoja Adi kI kucha aitihAsika bAteM likhI huI maiMne par3hI, mere mana meM ekadama koI naye jJAna ke prakAza kI kiraNa jhalakane lgii| __usa pATha meM maiMne sarvaprathama par3hA ki rAjA bhoja ne dhArAnagarI meM eka bahuta bar3A vidyAlaya banavAyA thaa| jisameM hajAroM chAtra saMskRta bhASA par3hate the / usa vidyAlaya kA nAma sarasvatI mandira thA / pIche se musalamAnoM ne usa sarasvatI maMdira ko tor3a DAlA aura usako eka masjida kA rUpa de diyaa| dhAra meM yaha masjida aba bhI vidyamAna hai, jise loga aba bhI kamAla maulA kI masjida ke nAma se pahacAnate haiM / eka do dina bAda vaha laDakA jaba mere pAsa phira AyA to maiMne pUchA ki tumane vaha kamAla maulA kI masjida kabhI dekhI hai ? usane kahA nahIM mahArAja maiMne use kabhI nahIM dekho / hA~ loga kahate haiM ki zahara se bAhara amuka tarapha vaha masjida AI huI hai| mere mana meM jijJAsA utpanna huI ki maiM kabhI jAkara usa masjida ko dekhU / eka dina maiM tapasvI jI mahArAja ke sAtha zauca ke liye zahara se bAhara udhara ho cale gaye / prAsapAsa meM kAphI jhAr3a jhaMkhAr3a khaDe the, usake bIca meM masjida kA bar3o so purAnA imArata najara AI / maiMne tapasvo jI se kahA mahArAna calA isa masjida ko jAkara dekheM / sunakara pahale to unhoMne kahA masjida meM jAkara kyA dekhanA hai ? parantu maiMne kahA-abhI eka skUla ko kitAba meM maiMne par3hA ki yaha masjida asala meM rAjA bhoja kA sarasvatI vidyA mandira haimusalamAnoM ne use tor3a tAr3a kara masjida kA rUpa de diyA hai| merA kucha prAgraha hone se tapasvI jI bole-calo andara dekha pAveM /

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( 12 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kA masjida kA daravAjA TUTA phUTA thaa| bIca meM bahuta se kaTIle jhAr3a jhakhAra bhI khar3e the / unameM se nikala kara maiM masjida ke bar3e dAlAna meM jA khar3A huA, taba dekhatA hU~ ki usameM saikar3oM TUTe phUDhe patthara aura mUrtiyoM ke khaNDita prAkAra asta vyasta rUpa meM par3e hue the / kucha do tona patthara ke purAne khambhe khar3e the, jina para koI yaMtra Adi jaise khude hue tathA kucha akSara likhe hue the / yoM meM jaina pustakoM ko purAno lipi ko yor3A bahuta par3ha sakatA thA / lekina ve akSara to aisI lipi meM the, ji.kA mujhe koI bodha nahIM thaa| masjida ke dAlAna meM maiMne ghUmakara dekhA to nIce jamIna ke pharma para aise bahuta se patthara ke choTe bar3e Tukar3e dAye hue the, jinameM bho usI prakAra ke akSaroM meM kaI paMktiyAM likhI huI dekhI / . maiM use dekha dAva kara tapasvo jI ke sAtha vApisa sthAnaka A gyaa| mere mana meM kucha aise taka hane lage ki ina akSaroM meM kyA likhA hogA ? ye patthara aise kyoM yahA~ jamAye gaye hoMge-ityAdi tarka mana meM uThe, para unakA sama dhAna pAne kA usa samaya vahA~ kAI sAdhana nahIM thaa| . dhAra ke usa sthAnaka ke pichale bhAga meM, jo khulA bAr3A thA, usameM bahuta sI bar3e prAkAra kI kucha jaina mUrtiyAM par3I huI thii| unameM se koI koI to tIna tIna cAra cAra phuTa jitanI U~cI tho kucha mUrtiyAM kAle patyara kI thii| kucha mUrtiyAM zveta patthara kI thii| para ye saba prAyaH khaNDita thI / pUchane para mAlUma huA ki usa sthAnaka ke najadIka ho koI acchA purAnA jaina mandira thA, jo TUTa phaTa gayA aura jisake patthara Adi to loga uThA uThA kara le gaye aura apane makAnoM Adi ke banAne meM unako kAma meM le liyA / ve mUrtiyAM jo isa mandira meM par3I huI thI, unako kucha bhAiyoM ne uThavA kara usa sthAnaka ke pIche vAle bAr3e meM lAkara rakha dI / bahuta varSoM se ye mUrtiyAM yahA~ par3I huI haiM / dhAra meM hama logoM ke sampradAya vAle kAphI jaina bhAiyoM kI bastI thii| parantu mujhe yaha nahIM jJAta ho sakA ki usa nagara meM koI jaina mandira bhI hai aura usako mAnane vAle mandiramArgI bhAiyoM ke bhI kucha ghara haiN| koI mahinA bhara hama dhAra meM rahe aura phira vahA~ se bihAra kara diyA / kaI gAMvoM meM ghUmate phirate hama ratalAma gaye / ratalAma meM jaina bhAiyoM kA kApho bar3A samudAya rahatA hai / vahA~ para eka acchA bar3A purAnA dharma sthAnaka bhI hai / usa stha naka meM eka vRddha sAdhu-jinake sAtha do tIna ziSya bhI the, kucha varSoM se usI sthAnaka meM sthira-vAsa hokara raha rahe the / ye sAdhu-jisa samprada.ya ke tapasvIjI kezarImalajI the- usI sampradAya ke ve bhIra www.jainelibran forg

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava the| vaha sampradAya-dharmadAsajI kA sampradAya-isa nAma se sthAnakavAso sampradAya ke anyAnya sampradAyoM meM prasiddha, thA / una vRddha sAdhu kA nAma to maiM bhUla gayA hai, para unake mukhya ziSya zrI nandalAla jo nAmaka the| jo usa sampradAya meM acche pratiSThita sAdhu samajhe jAte the| ye nandalAla jI mahArAja tapasvI jI kesarImalajo kI apekSA kucha adhika jJAnavAna the| inake pAsa bhI prAyaH merI umra vAlA eka nava dIkSita bAla ziSya thA aura saMyoga se usakA nAma bhI kizanalAla thA vaha eka brAhmaNa kA ho lar3akA thA aura kucha buddhi se bhI caMcala thaa| mere se pahane zAyada eka Der3ha varSa pahale usane dIkSA lI thii| isa prakAra ratalAma ke usa dharma sthAnaka meM dharmadAsajo sampradAya ke hama 8, 10 sAdhu ikaTThe ho gaye the| . ratalAma meM jAne para mujhe yaha jJAna hA ki sthAna : vAso sampradAya meM chAde bar3e sAdhunoM ke. aneka sampradAya haiM / ratalAma meM dharmadAsajI ke sampradAya kA mAnane vAle bhAiyoM kA apekSA eka anya sAdhu mahArAja ko mAnane vAle jaina bhAiyoM ko saMkhyA kucha adhika tho / ina sAdhu mahArAja kA nAma pUjya zrI lAlajo thaa| mAlave ke aura mevAr3a ke aneka gAMva meM inake kAphI bhakta loga the| inake samUdAya ke sAdhu loga una purAne dharma sthAnakoM meM nahIM Thaharate the / unakA mantavya thA ki ve dharma sthAnaka purAne jamAne meM zrAvakoM ne sAdhu saMtoM ke Thaharane ke liye banAye haiM- isaliye ye sthAnaka sAvadha karma ke poSaka haiM / ataH ina dharma-sthAnoM meM utarane se sAdhuoM ko sAvadha karma kA pApa lagatA hai / ityAdi kucha bAteM pahalI hI bAra mere sunane meM paaii| kahate haiM usa sampradAya vAle zrAvakoM ne apane dharma dhyAna Adi karane ke liye jo- naye makAna banAye unakA nAma unhoMne pauSadha zAlA aisA rakhA / jahA~ kahIM aisA pauSadha zAlAe~ thI unameM ukta pUjya zrI lAla jI ke anuyAyI sAdhu sata Thara sakate the / sthAnaka ke nAma se prasiddha purAne sthAnoM meM ve nahIM Thaharate the / ___ ratalAma meM hama loga kucha thor3e hI dina Thahare aura vahAM se phira bar3anagara prAdi gAMvoM meM vicarate rhe| maiM dhIre dhIre apanA dazavakAlika sUtra kA adhyayana karatA rahA aura sAtha meM kucha thokar3e bhI kaMThastha karatA rahA / yoM garmI ke cAra mahine vyatIta hue aura prASAr3ha mahine meM hama vApisa pAra pahu~ce / caumAsA dhAra meM karanA nizcita hogayA thaa| isaliye hama dhAra meM pAkara caturmAsa ke nimita usI sthAnaka meM Thahara gaye / merA dazavakAlika sUtra kA adhyayana pUrA ho gayA thaa| arthAt vaha pUrA sUtra maiMne kaMThastha kara liyA thA aura par3hA huA sUtra vismRta na ho jAya isake liye usakI pravRtti hamezA kI jAtI

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( 14 ) thI / isake liye rAtri ke uttara bhAga ke do tIna ghaMTe nizcita kiye the roja prAyaH tIna baje maiM apane bichaune meM jisako jaina sAdhu saMthArA kahate haiM-uTha baiThatA thA aura dhIre dhIre paDhe hue sUtra ke pATha kA smaraNa kiyA karatA thA / bAlyAvasthA thI / kucha nidrA kA jora bhI rahatA thaa| lekina niyamita rAtri ke do tIna ghaMTe par3he hue jJAna kI pravRtti karanA bhI Avazyaka thA / zrataH vaisA krama calatA rahA / kabhI nIMda adhika AtI thI to maiM khar3A hokara vaha pATha smaraNa karane laga jAtA thaa| isa prakAra pichalI rAta ke do tIna ghaMTe svAdhyAya meM niyamita rUpa se vyatIta karane kA abhyAsa karatA rahA / merI jovana prapaMca kathA dazavaikAlika - sUtra kA pATha kaMThastha ho jAne para phira naMdo sUtra kA pATha par3hanA zurU kiyA / dhAra vAle usa sthAnaka ke rAste vAle daravAje ke ThIka sanmukha eka acche sampanna zrAvaka kA ghara thA / usa ghara kA mukhiyA zrAvaka adhikatara dharma dhyAna karane meM apanA samaya vyatIta kiyA karatA thA / use bahuta se thokaDoM kA bhI jJAna thA jo samaya samaya para mere pAsa Akara baiTha jAtA thA aura mere liye bhI thokar3oM ke bAre meM vaha kucha zikSaka kA kAma kiyA karatA thA / vaha zrAvaka una dinoM niyamita nadI sUtra kA pATha kiyA karatA thA / roja subaha 7 baje se lekara 9, 10 baje taka vaha sAmAyika karake apane gharake eka alaga kamare meM baiTha jAtA thA aura naMdo sUtra ko purAnI, hAtha kI likhI, pothI para se usa sUtra kA pATha bhI kiyA karatA thA / naMdA-sUtra jaina AgamoM meM dazavaikAlika sUtra ke samAna hI eka pradhAna Agama grantha mAnA jAtA hai / yaha granyaM prAkRta gadyamaya hai / isakA bhI grantha pramANa prAyaH 700 zloka jitanA hai / isa sUtra meM mukhya karake jJAna viSayaka vicAra granthita hai| jaina mAnyatA mutAbika jJAna ke kitane prakAra aura bheda, upabheda haiM usakA vistRta varNana isa sUtra meM haiM aura isakA pATha par3hanA eka bahuta mAMgalika aura kalyANakArI samajhA jAtA hai / vaha zrAvaka niyamita rUpase prAyaH tIna ghaMTe isa sUtra kA pATha kiyA karatA thA / bahuta bAra par3hate rahane se prAyaH yaha sUtra usako kaMThastha ho gayA thA tathApi pATha smaraNa ke liye apane hAtha meM hastalikhita pothI ke panna e rakhakara mana hI mana vAcana kiyA karatA thaa| usakI dekhA dekhI mujhe bhI dhuna lagI thii| maiM bho usI taraha roja trAtaH 3 ghaMTe usakA svAdhyAya karatA rahA / prAyaH dhAra ke usa caturmAsa meM meM niyamita naMdo sUtra kA svAdhyAya karatA rahA / isase dhIre dhIre vaha mujhe binA kisI krama ke yoM hI kaMThastha jaisA ho gayA thA / dhAra ke usa caturmAsa meM mujhe jJAnAbhyAsa ke viSaya meM kucha nayA prakAza milA / saMyoga

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava va caturmAsa ke dinoM meM varSA adhika hone ke kAraNa dhAra kI ukta kamAla maulA masjida kA madhyabhAga kA purAnA gumbaja TUTa par3A / usa gumbaja ke TUTane para usake andara dIvAloM meM lagI haI do tIna patthara ko bar3I bar3I zilAyeM jamIna para A girii| una zilAnoM para bar3e sundara akSaroM meM kucha lekha se likhe hue the / jisako khabara dhara ke rAjya karmacAriyoM ko milo to unhoMne usakI sUcanA turanta agrejI sarakAra ke usa mahakameM ko pahu~cAI, jisa mahakameM ke adhikAra meM upara ke sTeToM ke aise purAne makAna Adi ke nirIkSaNa karane kA kAya thaa| bhArata sarakAra dvArA saMgaThita jo prArakyolojikala DipArTamenTa kahalAtA hai-usake vaisTarna sakala kA mukhya kAryAlaya pUnA meM thA / arthAt usa vibhAga kA heDa kvArTara pUnA meM thA / dhAra sTeTa dvArA kamAla maulA kI maMsjida meM ukta prakAra se do tIna bar3e zilA paTTa jamIna para gira par3e usakI tahakIkAta ke liye pUnA ke heDa kvArTara ko sUcanA dedI gii| isa sUcanA ko prApta kara pUnA se DaoN0 esa. pAra bhAMDarakara nAmaka vidvAna una zilA paTToM ko dekhane ke liye dhAra pAye / DaoN. zrIdhara bhAMDArakara se milana aura prAcIna lipi ke jJAna ko jIjAsA kA utpanna honA __DaoNkTara jinakA pUrA nAma zrIdhara rAmakRSNa bhAMDArakara thA-ve saMskRta ke bar3e vidvAn the praura usa samaya pUnA Dekana kaoNleja ke saMskRta vibhAga ke adhyakSa the / pUnA ke prArakyolojikala. vesTarna sarkala se unakA sambandha thaa| yoM ve kaI varSoM ma usa DipArTameMTa ke tatvAvadhAna meM veTana sarkala meM Aye hue bhinna bhinna sthAnoM meM saMskRta sAhitya ko khoja kA kAma kiyA karate the / DipArTamenTa kI ora se hara varSa do tIna mahine isa kArya ke liye vyatIta karanA unako Avazyaka hotA thaa| anAyAsa ve vibhAga ko ora se tahakIkAta ke liye dhAra ko usa masjida kA nirIkSaNa karane vahA~ phuNce| ve saMskRta ke vidvAn to the hI aura prAcIna zilA lekhoM ko lipi ko bhI acchI taraha par3ha lete the / jaba unhoMne masjida meM mile hue una zilA paTToM ko dekhA to ve bahuta Azcarya mugdha hue aura unhoMne DipATamenTa kI ora se usake phoTo, rabigsa (chpi| prAdi lene kA kArya kiyA aura una zilA paTToM kI koI kucha nuksAna na pahu~cAveM aura acchI taraha surakSita rakhA jAya, isake liye sTeTa ko ucita prabandha karane kI sUcanA dii|

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(16) merI jovana prapaMca kA - yoM pro. bhAMDArakara jaba dhAra pAye to nagara meM koI mandira maTha Adi haiM jinameM kucha purAne granya dekhane ko mile| yoM ve dhAra kA purAnA itihAsa acchI taraha jAnate the aura rAjA bhoja Adi kA itihAsa unhe acchI taraha jJAta thA / usa masjida ke bAre meM bhI unakA pUrA jJAna thA ki kaba musalamAnoM ne bhoja ke banAye hue usa mahAn sarasvatI mandira ko tor3a phor3a DAlA aura usako kaise naSTa bhraSTa kiyA gayA / isakA itihAsa to unheM avagata thA / parantu usa mandira ko pratyakSa dekhane kA unheM kabhI maukA nahIM milA / para ukta prakAra se jaba ve vahA~ masjida dekhane Aye taba usameM lage hue aneka TUTe phUTe zilAlekho ko bhI par3hane kA kucha prayatna kiyA / ho sakA vahA~ taka una lekhoM ko chApeM Adi bhI unhoMne livaalii| ye kAma pUrA kara lene para unhoMne zahara meM koI aise sthAna ho jinameM purAne granya vagairaha dekhane ko mile| kinhIM rAja karmacAro dvArA unheM patA lagA ki dhAra meM jaina lAgoM kA eka purAnA dharma sthAnaka hai, usameM sAdhu saMta hamezA mAte jAte rahate haiN| to unako icchA huI ki usa dharma sthAna meM koI purAne grantha dekhane ko mila jAya, aisA socakara ve hamAre dharma sthAnaka meM pAye / jaina sAdhuoM ke prAcAra vicAra se ve acchI taraha paricita the ho / sthAnaka meM Akara tapasvI jI mahArAja se namaskAra kiyA aura zrAvakoM ne unake baiThane ke liye kucha Asana sA rakha diyA thAjisa para ve baiTha gaye aura pUchane lage ki-mahArAna Apake isa dhama sthAnaka meM koI purAnA likhA huA jaina pustakoM prAdi kA saMgraha hai kyA ? aura Apake pAsa bhI kAI purAno likho huI pauthA prAdi hai ? tapasvIjI ne kahA-isa sthAnaka meM koI aisA grantha nahIM hai / ujjaina meM hamArA eka purAnA jaina dharma sthAnaka hai, usameM eka bar3A lakar3I kA baksA hai, jisameM aise kaI purAne likhe hue zAstra haiM / hameM usake pUre nAmAdi kA koI khAsa paricaya nahIM hai / yahA~ to hamAre apane nitya ke paThana pAThana yogya jo kucha sUtra Adi haiM, unameM eka purAnI likhI huI uttarAdhyayana sUtra kI pothI avazya hai, jisako pApa dekhanA cAheM to hama dikhAdeM / prophesara ne kahA, hA~ avazya dikhAiye / tapasIjI ne apane pAsa vAle vesTana ko khola kara usameM se vaha uttarAdhyayana kI prati DAkTara ke hAtha meM rakhI / ukta DAkTara ne to aisI hajAroM jaina pratiyAM dekha rakhI thii| turaMta usakA antima pamnA uThAyA aura usakI antima paMkti par3I to usameM likhA humA thA ki saMvat 1545 meM maMDapa mahAdUrga meM yaha prati amuka yati ne likhii| yaha par3hakara unhoMne pothI vApasa lauTAI aura kahA- yaha pothI itane varSa purAnI hai aura mAlave ke mAMDavagar3ha meM amuka ne likhAI aura amuka ne isakI pratilipi kI /

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (15), mujhe. jijJAsA huI. aura maine pUchA ki hamAre ujjaina vAle saMgraha meM kucha na tha aise kahe jAte haiM jinako koI par3ha nahIM sakatA / taba prophesara ne kahA- aise hajAroM grantha "vidvAnoM ne par3ha liye haiM aura par3hate jAte haiN| prAcIna lipi kA jJAna karane ke liye kucha aisI pustakeM bhI haiM jinako pAne se bhinna-bhinna prakAra kI prAcIna lipiyoM ke par3hane kA jJAna ho jAtA hai udAharaNa ke taura para unhoMne kahA ki ajamera meM eka aise vidvAna haiM jinhoMne prAcIna lipimAlA nAmaka pustaka banAI hai, / usa pustaka meM esI sabhI prAcIna lipiyoM ke par3hane kI sAmagrI saMkalita kI hai basa itanI bAta kaha kara ve uTha khar3e hue / taba maine unase pUchA ki isa masjida meM Apane jo naye zilA lekha Adi dekhe haiM / unameM kyA likhA huaA hai ? prophesara ne ha~sate hue kahA kAjA bhoja ke samaya ke likhe gaye kucha mahatva ke lekha prAdi ina cilAnoM para khude hue haiN| hamAre liye itihAsa ko dRSTi se yaha bahuta bar3o naI sAmagro hai| hama loga aba isakA acchI taraha adhyayana Adi kareMge aura ina para prakAza prAdi DAleMge ! yaha kaha kara ve sthAnaka se ravAnA ho gye| usa dina se mere mana meM prAcIna lipiyoM kA jJAna kaise prApta kiyA jAya aura kisa taraha itihAsa kI ye mahatva kI bAteM samajho jAya, isakA jJAna prApta karane kI antara meM eka tIvra jijJAsA ne bIjAropaNa kara diyA / vaha mAno mere samagra bhAvI jIvana kA eka parama lakSya rUpa antara meM sthira hogyaa| ye lakSya kaba aura kaise kArya rUpa meM pariNata hone lagA isakA varNana jIvanI ke Age ke prasaMgoM meM yathA sthAna pAyegA / jaina sAdhuoM ke AcAra viSayaka kucha vicAra dhAra kA vaha cAturmAsa samApta hone para hama logoM ne anyatra vicarane kA upakrama kiyA / jisa sampradAya meM maiM thA aura jisa samaya kA maiM yaha varNana kara rahA hU~, usa samaya ukta sampradAya ke sAdhu saMta cAturmAsa kI samApti hote hI usa sthAna se vihAra kara dete the aura caturmAsa ke sivAya, jaina sAdhu jisako zeSakAla kahA karate haiM- kisI eka grAma meM eka mahine se adhika nahIM Thaharate the| maiM jabataka usa sampradAya meM rahA, prAyaH taba taka isa niyama kA pAlana barAbara hotA rahA / vartamAna meM sthAnakavAsI sAdhunoM ke prAcAra meM bhI bahuta zithilatA dikhAI detI hai| maiMne jisa prakAra ke prAcAra kA pAlana kiyA, vaise AcAra kA pAlana zAyada hI vartamAna samaya ke -kyA

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(18) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA sthAnaka bAsI, kyA teraha paMthI sAdhunoM meM hotA hogaa| mUrtipUjaka sampradAya ke sAdhuSoM meM to usa prakAra ke prAcAra ke pAlana kI koI kalpanA hI nahIM kI jAtI / ____ hamAre pAsa pahanane ke liye do cola paTTa aura praur3hane ke liye tona caddara hoto thI usase adhika vastra nahIM rakhate the / siyAle meM cAhe jitano ThaMDa par3atI ho una tIna caddaroM ke sivAya adhika koI vastra nahIM rakhate the| noce bichAne ke liye cola paTTa hI kA rAtrI meM upayoga kiyA karate the| par3hane ke liye kucha likhita grantha sAtha meM rakhate the, ve itane hI pramANa meM rakha sakate the. jinako eka kapar3e ke vesTana meM bAMdhakara svayaM uThAkara le jA sakate the| ye pothiyoM ke do vesTana hote the jinako isa prakAra eka kapar3e ke Tukar3e meM bAMdha liye jAte the, jo calate samaya gale meM DAla liye jAte the / inameM kA eka vesTana pITha para laTakatA thA / dUsarA vesTana Age chAtI para laTakA rahatA thaa| isase adhika pustakeM kabhI pAsa nahIM rakhI jAtI thiiN| pustaka na kisI gRhastha ke dvArA maMgavAI jAtI thI, na gRhastha ke dvArA kisI anya sAdhu ke pAsa bhijavAI jAto thii| hama sAdhu na kabhI kisI ko ciTThI likha kara DAka dvArA kahIM bhijavAte the| maiMne usa sAdhu veza meM kabhI koI posTa kArDa na dekhA, na kabhI kisI ko kahIM likhA / chapI huI pustaka ke par3hane kA bahuta samaya taka koI maukA hI nahIM milA / purAne sAdhupro ke hAtha kI likhI huI, kucha thokar3oM kI pratiyAM mere dekhane meM AtI to maiM usako pratilipi karane kA prayatna krtaa| maiM koziza karane lagA ki jisa taraha kI sundara suvAcya lipi meM likhI huI pratilipi mere sAmane hai - usI taraha ke akSaroM meM meM use likhuu| isake liye dhore-dhIre meM apane akSaroM kI prAkRti ko su-dara banAne kA prayatna karane lagA, parantu usa sAvu sampradAya meM pena yA peMsila rakhane kA athavA usakA upayoga karane kA niSedha thA / likhane kA sAdhana eka mAtra mahAjana vyApArI loga jisa prakAra kI barU kI kalamoM kA upayoga karate hai, vaisI hI eka do kala meM kiso zrAvaka ke yahAM se mAMga lete aura unake dvArA kAlo syAho se likhane kA kAma kiyA jaataa| parantu vaha syAhI kaisI hotI thI isakA bhI manoraMjaka varNana hai / cInI miTTo kI usa jamAne meM milane vAlI choTI davAta prApta kara usameM kisI zrAvaka kI dUkAna se syAhI mAMga lAte the / para vaha syAho rAta ko apane pAsa vaise rUpa meM rakha nahIM sakate the / isake liye dina meM usa syAhI kA upayoga kara lene ke bAda rAta meM jo baca jAtI tA usako vaisI hI cInI miTTI kI choTI sI pyAlo meM nikAla dete aura use havA meM sUkhane ko rakha dete| phira dUsare dina savere jaba zrAvaka ke ghara se kahIM zuddha nivaidha pAnI bahora lAte to usake kucha bindu usa rAta meM sUkhI huI syAhI meM DAla kara use ghola kara likhane yogya banA lete / maiMne prayatna kara thor3e hI dinoM meM apane akSara acche sundara maror3a vAle banA liye the aura

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kI jIvanAnubhava (16) maiMne dhIre dhIre purANe 300-400 varSa pahale ke likhe gaye granthoM kI lipi ke anurUpa. apanI lipi banAne kA abhyAsa kara liyA thaa| maiMne sabase pahale kaMThastha kiye gaye dazavakAlika sUtra ko pUrI pratilipi apane hAtha se likhanI zurU krdii| isakA pUrA karane meM mujhe kaI mahine lge| pratidina 15,20 gAthAoM ko pratilipi meM isa prakAra kiyA karatA thA : syAhA aura barU ko kalama kA usI prakAra hamezA upayoga kiyA jAtA thA jisakA sUcana maiMne Upara ka paktiyoM meM kiyA hai / syAhI ke rakhane ko aura roja sukhAkara use phira dUsare dina gholakara likhane yogya banAne meM bar3A zrama sA lagatA thA / gahasyoM ko dukAnoM para syAhI ko davAta bharo rahatI thI parantu hama apane AcAra ke kAraNa usa syAhI kA vai / / upayoga nahIM kara sakate the| mana meM kucha aTapaTA sA lagA karatA thA parantu prAcAra ke pAlana meM zithilatA kA bhAva manameM utpanna hAne denA pAra baMdhana kA kAraga samajhA jAtA thA / do tIna bararA ke prAcAra pAlana se manameM aise saMskAra dRr3ha se dRr3ha hote gaye the / anya kisI saMskAra yA vicAroM ke Agamana kA usa samaya hRdaya meM koI dvAra nahIM thA / ajJAta zraddhA ke kAraNa hI aisA kaThorAva.ra kA bhI pAlana mata pUrvaka hotA rahatA thA / eka gAMva se dUsare gAMva meM vihAra karate samaya kabhI dhUpa se tapta garmiyoM meM calane kA avasara AtA thA to sAtha meM pAne ke liye jA kucha pAno dopahara kI gocarI ke samaya bahora kara lAte the, usIkA kucha bhAga rAste meM calate samaya pAne ke liye sAtha meM eka pAtra meM rakha liyA karate the / para vaha pAno, jisa gAMva se nikalate the usase do kosa se adhika dUrI para lejAnA niSiddha yA / isaliye calate 2 do kosa (cAra mAila / jaba pUre hone Ate the, taba kisI eka zRddha bhUmi meM baiTha kara pAnI kA antima upayoga kara liyA jAtA thA / bAkI jo pAnI kucha baca jAtA to use vahIM zuddha bhUmi para paraTha dete the| phira bAda meM cAhe jitanI pyAsa lage to use bujhAne kA koI prAMga nahIM rahatA thA / aisA taba avasara prAtA thA jaba vihAra kA rAstA kahIM 5 10 mIla kA lambA ho aura zAma taka gantavya sthAna para na pahu~cA jA sakatA ho / sUryAsta ke bAda to calanA sarvathA niSiddha yA / ataH sUryAsta ke pahale hI kisI gAMva meM jAkara rAtri nivAsa ke liye apanA sthAna khoja lenA aAvazyaka hotA thA / aisA prasaMga jaba bhAtA thA, jaba kiso gAMva meM jaina bhAiyoM ko koI basto na ho / prAyaH mAlave meM to hamako aise prasaMga nahIM pAye, parantu prAge cala kara, jaisA ki batAyA jAyagA, dakSiNa deza ke pradezoM meM vicarate samaya hamako aise aneka anubhava hue / dhAra se vihAra kara hama la ga kaI gAMvoM meM hote hue indaura pahuMce / indaura mAlave kA suprasiddha nagara hai vahA~ jainiyoM kI bastI bhI kAphI bar3I hai| sthAnaka vAso sampradAya ke AmnAya

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( 20 ) vAle mahAjanoM ke ghara bhI acchI tAdAda meM haiM / prAyaH ye mahAjana ukta dharmadAsajI kI sampradAya ke zrAmnAya vAle the, vahA~ para molazrI nAma kI eka prasiddha galI hai, jisameM acchA sA bar3A dharma sthAnaka banA huA hai / hama loga usI dharmasthAnaka meM jA kara Thahare / zAyada tapasvIjI ne usa zahara meM pahale do tIna caturmAsa kiye the / isaliye zahara ke saba zrAvaka jana unake acche suparicita the / tapasvIjI ne sAdhu munnAlAlajI ko unake putra vAlaka motIlAla ke sAtha koI tona cAra varSa pahale usI indaura meM dIkSA dI thii| tapasvIjI ke sAtha maiM unakA nava dIkSita bAla sAdhu naye sadasya ke rUpa meM usa dharmasthAnaka meM praviSTha huA / merI jovana prapaMca kathA indaura bahuta bar3A zahara hai / kI bhavyatA, vizAlatA Adi deva kara indaura zahara kA varNana usa zahara meM purAnA rAjavAr3A ke nAma se jo bhavya aura vizAla rAja mahala banA huA hai aura vaha 6 se 7 maMjila jitanA U~cA hai / itanI bar3I imArata maiMne jIvana meM pahale kabhI nahIM dekhI thI, jise dekha dekha kara merA mana cakita huA karatA thA / usa purAne rAjavAr3A ke pAsa hI holkara mahArAjA ne apanA nayA rAjavAr3A banavAyA thA / jo usa samaya naye DhaMga ke makAnoM kA eka namUnA samajhA jAtA thaa| usake maidAna meM aura AsapAsa rAtri kI rozanI ke liye gesa kI battiyAM lagI huI thiiN| jinheM lAga rAtri ke samaya dekhane AyA karate the / bijalI kA pracAra zAyada usa samaya taka nahIM huA thA / sthAnaka ke eka bhAga meM se usa gesa kI eka battI dikhAI detI thI jisako maiMne jindagI meM pahalI bAra dekhA / itanA bar3A zahara maiMne pahale koI nahIM dekhA thA / zahara mujhe grAzvarya yukta manoraMjana hotA thA / roja prAtaH zauca ke liye hama zahara se bAhara kahIM dUra cale jAte the aura jahA~ hameM zauca kriyA ke liye zuddha bhUmi mila jAtI vahIM vaha kriyA kara prAte / isa nimitta hama zahara ke anyAnya bhAgoM meM ho kara kabhI kidhara aura kabhI kidhara, zauca ke liye dUra nikala jAte the mujhe AsapAsa kA pradeza dekhane kA zauka rahatA thA / isIliye sAdhutroM ko prAgraha pUrvaka meM aise pranyAnya bhAgoM meM leM jAne kA prayatna karatA rahatA thA / indaura meM jaba hama the taba musalamAnoM ke moharrama kA utsava prasaMga A gayA thA / indau

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (21) meM muharrama ke dina bahuta bar3e paimAne para tAbUtoM kA julUsa barasoM se nikalatA rahA hai / rAjya kI aura se bhI bahuta bar3A tAbUta banavAyA jAtA thaa| jisake banAne meM ATha dasa mahine taka kaI kArIgara lage rahate the / rAjya kA yaha tAbUta bar3e rAjazAhI ThATha se nikAlA jAtA thaa| ise dekhane ke liye prAsapAsa ke aneka gAMvoM se hajAroM loga Ate rahate the| usa julUsa meM rAjya kA, ghur3a savAra aura paidala miliTrI kA pUrA lavAjamA, bar3I sajadhaja ke sAtha nikalatA thaa| usa samaya dezI rAjyoM meM holkara rAjya kI miliTro pahale nambara meM ginI jAto tho usa miliTrI kA pUrA daba dabA usa dina dikhAyA jAtA thA / / mere pAsa kucha yuvaka thAvaka lar3ake pAkara baiThate the / unhoMne kahA celAjI mahArAja Ara bhI isa julUsa ko dekhane cleN| maiMne kahA-bhAI hama sAdhu aise julUsa dekhane ko kahA~ jAyeM? taba unameM se eka nava yuvaka ne kahA ki hamArA ghara usI bAjAra meM hai jisake Age ho kara vaha pUrA julUsa gujregaa| Apa do tIna ghaNTe grAkara hamAre ghara kI Upara ko maMjila meM pAkara baiThe aura yaha julUsa dekheM / suna kara merA mana eka dama utkaThita ho gayA aura maiMne tapasvIjo mahArAja se kahA ki Apa prAjJA deM to maiM Aja usa tAbUta ke julUsa ko avazya dekhanA cAhatA hU~ / na jAne kyoM tapasvIjI ne hA~ bhara lI aura kahA--tU aura motIlAlajI donoM choTe sAdhu cale jApro aura dekha Ayo / suna kara motIlAlajI ke pitA sAdhu munnAlAla jo bole-mahArAja mujhe bhI AjJA ho to maiM ina donoM bAla sAdhuoM ke sAtha calA jAU / tAstrI jI ne ho bharalI / hama jaldI jaldI pAhAra pAno karake usa yuvaka ke sAtha usake ghara para cale gye| usa bAjAra meM hajAroM loga subaha se hI ThaThTha jame hue the| indaura ke sarakAro tAbUta kA julUsa dekhanA usa ilAke meM eka prasiddha prasaMga samajhA jAtA thaa| hama loga zrAvaka ke ghara pahu~ca kara usakI dUkAna kI Upara vAlI maMjila meM khir3akiyoM ke pAsa baiTha gye| dhIre dhIre julUsa ke Ane kI hala cala bar3hane lagI / hajAroM loga idhara udhara daur3a dhUpa kara rahe the| itanI bar3o mAnava medinI aura kI aisI cahala pahala maiMne jindagI meM pahalI bAra dekho jisame mere mana kA kutUhala bhI isI taraha uchala kUda karane lgaa| koI do baje ke lagabhaga julUsa kI agavAno Ane lagI pahale musalamAnoM dvArA banAye gaye aneka choTe baDe tAbUta nikalane zurU hue / usake poche mukhya masjida meM banAye gaye tAbUta ko savArI AI, usake sAtha hajAroM musalamAna taraha taraha ke khela kUda karate hue cala rahe the| anekoM ke hAthoM meM naMgI talavAreM thIM aura ve inheM isa taraha se ghumAte jAte the ki jise dekha kara

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(22) merI jovana prapaMca kathA mana meM bhaya bhI utpanna ho jAtA thaa| naMgI talavAroM ke aneka khela ve karate jAte the / usa tAbUta ke pIche sarakArI tAbUta kA lavAjamA AnA zurU huaa| sase Age ghur3a savAroM ko eka palTa na thii| jisake Age usI palTana kA miliTrI beMDa bhI ghoDoM hI para baja rahA thaa| miliTrI kA yaha baiMDa koI 70, 80 AdamiyoM kA bar3A kAphalA thA / baiMDa ke poche ghuDa savAroM kI palTana thI jo acchI saja dhaja ke sAtha cala rahI thii| ginatI kI to yAda nahIM para kama se kama 2 hajAra ghuDa savAra usameM hoNge| ghuDa savAroM ke pIche paidala sipAhiyoM kI Tukar3iyAM thoM jo alaga alaga risAle ke rUpa meM prasiddha thIM / hareka risAle kA apanA bar3A baiMDa thA jisameM bhI 60, 70 javAna the / miliTrI ke ye javAna taraha taraha ko pozAkoM meM saje hue the| isa taraha eka ke bAda eka miliTrI ke paidala risAle calate gye| kahA jAtA thA ki usa julUsa meM 10 hajAra paidala javAna sammilita hote the / / anta meM vaha sarakArI tAbUta pAyA jo cAra pA~ca maMjila jitanA U~cA thA aura hajAroM rupayoM kI lAgata se vaha banAyA gayA thaa| use dekha kara mujhe lagA ki jovana meM maiMne Aja koI nayA Azcarya janaka dRzya dekhA hai / jisako kalpanA isake pahale mujhe kabhI nahIM huI thii| prAyaH saMdhyA samaya hone AnA pAyA thA aura julUma ke khatma hote ho hamaloga apane sthAnaka meM cale Aye aura phira kucha AhAra pAnI kA samaya thA, use nipaTa liyA aura sAyaMkAla kA pratikramaNa karane baiTha gye| prAyaH eka mahInA jitanA samaya indaura meM vyatIta kara hamane devAsa nagara kI tarapha prasthAna kiyA / devAsa kA paricaya devAsa nagara bhI dhAra kI hI taraha mAlave kA eka choTA sA sTeTa thA / vahAM kA rAjagharAnA marAThe paMvAra (paramAra) vaMza kA thaa| yoM yaha sTeTa pezavAoM ke samaya marAThoM ke adhikAra meM pAgayA thaa| pahale mAlave ke rAjapUta logoM ke adhikAra meM yaa| yoM mAlave ke gvAlIyara, indaura, dhAra, devAsa Adi kaI choTe bar3e sTeTa pezavAoM aura marAThoM ke rAjyakAla ke daramyAna bane the / devAsa choTA sA hI sTeTa thaa| isake adhikAra meM aAsapAsa ke dasa bIsa gAMva hoMge sTeTa kA baMdavArA koI do tIna pIr3hiyoM pahale, do bhAgoM meM ho gayA, jisako vahAM ke loga choTI pAMti aura bar3I pAMtI ke nAma se pahacAnate the / khuda devAsa nagara bhI isa prakAra do pAMtiyoM meM baMTA huA thA / Adhe nagara para choTI pAMtI kA adhikAra thA, Adhe nagara para bar3I pAMtI kA / sTeTa kI haisiyata ke mutAbika kucha miliTrI ke aura kucha pulisa ke javAna bhI rahate the| indaura se

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava calane ke bAda kucha gAMvoM meM hote hue hama devAsa phuNce| vahAM ke jaina bhAI bho dharmadAsajI ke sampradAya ke AmnAya vAle the / ( 23 ) / nagara ke madhya meM choTA sA rAjavAr3A bhI thA, jisameM rAjya ke rAjavAr3e ke sAmane eka jaina mahAjana kA nayA sA makAna banA huA thA hama sAdhuoM ko ThaharAyA gayA / zAyada vahAM koI dharmasthAnaka nahIM thA bAra Ate jAte rahe the / isaliye grAmavAsI sabhI zrAvaka bhAI bahina unake acche suparicita the / pahale ve kabhI vahAM gaye the taba unake sAtha unake bar3e ziSya kevala acaladAsa jI hI the| abakI bAra ve hama munnAlAlajI Adi tIna naye ziSyoM ke sAtha vahAM pahuMce the isaliye gA~va ke purAne zrAvakoM ko apane guru sampradAya kI dRSTi se kucha grAnaMdasA huaa| jisa makAna meM hama Thahare the usake sAmane hI rAjavAr3e kA Age kA vizAla cauka sA thaa| jisameM rAjyakartAoMoM kI savArI kI baggiyAM vagairaha par3I rahatI thiiN| usa samaya moTareM AI nahIM thI / sTeTa ke mAlika athavA gharAne kI striyAM kahIM bAhara jAtI to do ghor3oM kI baggiyoM meM baiThakara jAtI prAtI rahatI thIM / rAjavAr3e ke mukhya daravAje para do baMdUkadhArI saMtarI sadA tainAta rahate the| subaha ke samaya niyamAnusAra sTeTa ke jitane bhI miliTro aura pulisa ke javAna nagara meM rahate the una sabakI Adhe ghaMTe taka kavAyada hotI thii| tIna cAra bigula vAle aura do eka Dhola vAle javAna milakara baiMDa kA kAma kiyA karate the / makAna meM baiThA baiThA yaha dRzya maiM kutUhala ke sAtha dekhA karatA thaa| kyoM ki aisI pareDa Adi kA dekhane sunane kA mujhe kabhI koI prasaga nahIM milA thaa| dina meM maiM apanA pratilipi kA kArya niyamita rUpa se karatA rahatA thA / kartAhartA rahA karate the usI usake Upara kI maMjila meM tapasI jI usa nagara meM kaI eka dina dopahara ko eka acche se saMskArI dikhane vAle bhAI tapasI jI mahArAja ke darzana karane ke nimitta Aye, ve vahAM ke eka dhanika kuTumba ke mukhiyA the / mAlUma huA ki ye devAsa ke rahane vAle hai - lekina indaura meM vakAlata karate haiM / ve acche prasiddha vakIla the / prasaMgavaza devAsa Aye hue the aura sunakara tamsI jI mahArAja ke darzana karane cale Aye / sAmAnya rUpa se vaMdana vageraha kiyA aura tapasIjI ne to inako dharma dhyAna Adi ke viSaya meM pUchA to unhoMne kahA- mahArAja hama loga to vakAlata kA kAma karate haiM, isaliye sAmayika Adi aura koI dhArmika kriyAeM karane kA hameM avasara nahIM miltaa| hAM jarUra sAhitya ke par3hane kA mujhe zauka hai aura maiM use par3hatA rahatA huuN| abhI kucha dina pahale se maiM eka aMgrejI bhASA kI pustaka par3hane lagA hU~ aura yahI pustaka mere hAtha meM hai / yaha pustaka vilAyata meM chapI haiM aura isameM apane dharma ke uttarAdhyayana aura kalpasUtra ke aMgrejI bhASA meM kiye gaye anuvAda hai / isa anuvAda kA karane vAlA eka bahuta bar3A jarmana vidvAna hai - jo prAkRta bhASA aura jaina

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( 24 ) AgamoM kA bar3A vidvAna hai| isa pustaka kI prastAvanA meM jaina-dharma kI prAcInatA ke bAre meM bar3e vistAra se likhA gayA hai / jisakA hama logoM ko koI jJAna nahIM hai / hamAre sAdhu loga bhI ina bAtoM ko bilkula nahIM jAnate / mujhe kucha zauka hone se maiM inako jAnane kA prayatna kara rahA hUM / isa pustaka kI prastAvanA meM kaI bAteM aisI likhI gaI hai jinake viSaya meM jaina logoM kA kucha vicitra khyAla ho sakatA hai / maiM pAsa hI meM baiThA-baiThA apanI pratilipe kA kArya kara rahA thA / parantu unakI bAteM dhyAna se suna rahA thA usa samaya taka mujhe jo kucha thor3A sA jaina zAstroM kA jJAna ho gayA thA unakI bAteM suna kara mujhe kucha usa viSaya meM jAnane kI jijJAsA utpanna huI; parantu tapasIjI mana meM vaisI koI jijJAsA nahIM thI / unhoMne usa bhAI ko itanA hI kahA ki hama sAdhu loga to apane zAstroM ke svAdhyAna ke sivAya anya kisI prakAra kA paThana-pAThana Adi nahIM karate, ityAdi sunakara ve bhAI namaskAra karake cale gaye / mere mana meM usa bhAI kI bAta se eka naye saMskAra ne ajJAta bhAva se bIjAropaNa kara diyA ki mujhe aisI bAtoM kA jJAna prApta karane kA apane jIvana meM prayatna karanA cAhiye / imA bojAkura me bhaviSya meM mere abhyAsa aura adhyayana kI icchA ne viziSTa sthAna prApta kara liyA / mero jIvana prapaMca kathA kucha dina devAsa meM Thahara kara hama logoM ne ujjaina kI tarapha vihAra kiyA aura pAne vAlA caumAsA ujjaina meM bitAne kA nizcaya huA / ujjaina meM cAturmAsa ujjaina mAlavA deza kI prasiddha prAcIna rAjadhAnI hai| ujjaina kA prAcIna itihAsa bhArata varSa ke prAcIna itihAsa meM bar3A mahatva kA sthAna rakhatA hai / yadyapi mujhe ina bAtoM kA usa samaya koI jJAna nahIM thA / tathApi logoM ke mukha se kiMvadaMtiyA sunane meM AI thIM / vikrama rAjA, rAjA bharatarI, harI, tathA khApariyA cora kI kaI loka kathAeM usa pradeza meM pracalita thiiN| ujjaina hI meM eka daphA bhayaMkara koI devI prakopa huA, jisake kAraNa purAnA sArA zahara dhUla kI varSA meM daba gayA aura usake avazeSa prAja bhI vartamAna ujjaina nagara se kucha dUrI para ziprA nadI ke par3ate haiM / loga use dhUlakoTa vAle sthAna ke nAma se pahacAnate haiM / taTa para dikhAI - isI taraha ziprA nadI ke ke liye bhArata varSa ke kaune kaune se ziva maMdira, kAzI vizvanAtha ke taTa para mahAkAlezvara kA prAcIna ziva maMdira hai jisake darzana hajAroM hindU yAtrI prativarSa prAte rahate haiM / mahAkAlezvara kA yaha ziva maMdira ke samAna hI pUjanIya mAnA jAtA hai| bAraha varSa

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava ( 25 ) meM eka bAra kumbha kA mahA melA bhI isa maMdira ke nimitta ujjaina meM lagatA hai isa mahA parva ke avasara para lAkhoM yAtrI bhAratavarSa ke kone kone se Ate haiM aura hajAroM sAdhu, saMta, bAbA, jogI, khAkhI, vairAgo, udAsI, sanyAsI, Adi tyAgI kahalAne vAle sAdhu saMtoM kI bhI jamAte ikaTTI hoto haiM / ___ mahAkAlezvara ke maMdira ke pAsa hI 64 yoganiyoM kA prAcIna maMdira hai / jo aba prAyaH bhagnAvasthA meM hai| 64 yoganiyoM ko vikrama rAjA ne prasanna kI thii| jisakI aneka kahAniyAM logoM meM pracalita hai| vikrama rAjA ko caupaI nAmaka eka purAnA koI 300 varSa pahale racA gayA dezI bhASA kA padyamaya kathA prabandha maiMne par3hA thA / ina bAtoM ke kucha saMskAra mana meM jame hue the / isaliye ujjaina ko dekhane kI merI abhilASA thii| ujjaina tapamI jI ke sampradAya kA mukhya sthAna thaa| isa sampradAya ke prAdya mAne jAne vAle sAdhu zrI dhamadAmajI bahuta samaya taka ujjaina meM rahe the aura unake bhakta zrAvakoM kA vaha mukhya sthAna thA / tapasI jI ke guru zrIrAmaratanajI jo apane samaya meM sampradAya ke eka acche saMta mAne jAte the| unako vRddhAvasthA kA adhika samaya ujjaina ho meM vyatIta huprA thaa| ujjaina kI suprasiddha lUNa maMDI nAmaka galI meM sampradAya kA prAcIna dhamasthAnaka banA huA hai| isI dharmasthAnaka meM jAkara hamane nivAsa kiyA, aura vaha pUrA cAturmAsa vahAM vyatIta kiyaa| ujjaina ke eka udAra-cetA nagaraseTha kA varNana.... ujjaina meM kAphI jaina zrAvakoM kI bastI hai| unameM kaI acche dhanika bhI haiN| vahAM para eka sabase adhika dhanADhya yamajhA jAne vAlA eka jaina kuTumba thA jo isa samaya to sAmAnya sthiti meM thA / vaha kuTumba navalakkhA ke nAma se nagara meM prasiddha thA / unakI havelI usa samaya bhI vidyamAna thI / kahate haiM ki pezavAnoM ke jamAne meM eka bar3A saradAra bahuta bar3I phauja lekara ujjaina kI bastI ko lUTo paayaa| pezavAnoM ke jamAne meM yaha Ama mazahUra bAta thI ki jaba kabhI unake saradAroM ke pAsa apanI phauja ko dene-khilAne Adi kA koI artha prabandha nahIM hotA thA, to ve apanI phauja ko lekara kapI aise acche nagara ko, jahAM dhanikoM aura vyApAriyA kI acchI bastI hotI thI, lUTane ke lie TUTa pdd'te| isa taraha vaha pezavA saradAra jaba ujjaina ke logoM ko lUTane pahU~cA to nagara nivAsI mahAjana saba ekatra hue aura nagara seTha jo navalakkhA kahalAte the -unake pAsa pahuMce / nagara para Aye hue

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(26 ) mero jovana prapaMca kathA saMkaTa kA nivAraNa kisa taraha kiyA jAya, isa viSaya meM nagara-seTha kI pramukhatA meM vicAra vinimaya hmaa| usa samaya grAmoM para tathA nagaroM para pAne vAle aise saMkaTo kA sAmanA karane ke liye nagara ke jo mahAjanoM ke mukhiyA hote the, ve hI eka parAmarza ke liye aAdhArabhUta hote the / ujjaina ke una navalakkhA nagaraseTha ne mahAjanoM se kahA ki meM usa pezavA ke saradAra kI chAvanI meM jAkara saradAra se bAtacIta karU' ki ve kisaliye ujjaina para phauja lekara pAye haiM ? tadanusAra nagara ser3ha apane kucha vizvasta munIma Adi ko sAtha lekara usa saradAra ke pAsa phuNce| usa samaya kI prathAnusAra nagaraseTha ne saradAra ko kucha najarAnA bheMTa kiyaa| saradAra ko mAlUma humA ki yaha ujjaina kA nagaraseTha hai / ujjaina kI sArI prajA inako bahuta Adara aura sanmAna kI dRSTi se dekhatI hai| ye jo kucha prajA-janoM ko salAha dete haiM - vaisA prajA-jana vyavahAra karate haiM / saradAra jAnatA thA ki ujjaina ke isa dhanADhya nagaraseTha ko sAre mAlavA meM bar3I prasiddhi aura khyAti hai / isaliye usane nagara seTha ko bar3e sammAna ke sAtha apane pAsa gaddI para biThAyA aura pUchA ki kisaliye ApakA yahA~ pAnA huyA ? javAba meM nagara seTha ne kahA ki hamAre nagara ke prajAjanoM ne sunA hai ki Apa ujjaina ko bastI ko lUTane ke irAde se Aye haiM / isaliye sabhI prajAjana bhaya se bar3e trasta haiM aura gharabAroM ko baMda kara apane kuTumba kabIloM ko lekara idhara udhara dUra ke gAMvoM meM bhAga jAne kI kozizeM kara rahe haiM / nagara ke mahAjana maura viziSTa prajAjanoM ne ekatra hokara mujhase kahA ki Apa saradAra ke pAsa jA kara koI rAstA nikAleM / isa dRSTi se maiM Apake pAsa AyA hU~ / Apa kyA cAhate haiM ? uttara meM saradAra ne kahA ki kaI mahine ho gaye / merI phoja ko kucha dene aura khilAne ke liye mere pAsa paisA nahIM hai| isaliye ujjaina ke dhanika logoM se paisA lene pAyA hU~ / . taba nagara seTha ne kahA ki Apako philahAla kitane rupayoM kI jarUrata hai ? usa samaya cAdI aura sone ke sikke ho deza meM saba vyavahAra ke liye calate the| Aja kI taraha kAgajI noTa nahIM the| sone cAMdI ke sikke, sera aura maNoM meM tole jAte the aura andAjana unakA mUlya mAna liyA jAtA thaa| __ saradAra ne kahA-mujhe 50 lAkha rupayoM kI jarUrata hai so Apa pUrI karadeM to maiM vApisa calA jaauuNgaa| nagara seTha ne turanta kahA-maiM do cAra dina meM usa rakama kA prabandha kara dUMgA aura Apake pAsa pahuMcA dUMgA / kRpA kara Apa apane sainikoM ko Adeza dedeM ki ve nagara janoM ko kisI bhI

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (2.) prakAra se na satAveM aura na Asa pAsa ke choTe gAMvoM meM hI koI lUTa pATa kA kAma kareM / sunakara saradAra ne kahA-ApakI bAta mujhe maMjUra hai aura Apa para pUrA vizvAsa hai isaliye maiM Apake kisI vizvasta janoM ko jamAnata ke taura para baMdI banAkara rakhanA nahIM caahtaa| phira nagara seTha saradAra ko mujarA Adi kara uTha kara apanI pAlakho meM baiThakara vApisa nagara meM cale Aye aura phira saba mahAjanoM ko ekatra kara saradAra ke sAtha huI bAta cIta se unako paricita karAyA / mahAjanoM ne kahA-itanA rupayA ikaThA karane kI to isa nagara ke prajAjanoM kI koI zakti nahIM hai / sunakara mana meM gaMbhIra bhAva se soca kara nagara seTha ne mahAjanoM se kahA ki-maiM nagara kI sthiti ko acchI taraha jAnatA hU~ / para nagara janoM para yaha mahAna jo saMkaTa pAyA hai, isake liye mujhe yathAzakti apane nagara kI rakSA ke liye kartavya bajAnA merA dharma hai / so maiM soca vicAra kara eka do dina meM isakA kucha prabandha kruugaa| phira seTha ne apanI jo vRddha vidhavA mAtA thI usako jAkara ekAnta meM yaha saba bAta sunAI / mAtA bar3I dharmaniSTa aura dayAzIla thI / usane kahA ki beTA abhI to apo pAsa jo kucha hai usako ikaThThA kara usa saradAra ke pAsa tuma apane vacanoM ke anusAra pahu~cA do| mujhe yaha to mAlUma nahIM hai ki tumhArI dUkAnoM meM abhI kitanA jhapayA upalabdha hai, parantu apane pUrvajoM ne makAna ke nicale tahakhAnoM meM rupayoM se bhare hue kucha carU gAr3a rakhe haiM / unako nikalavA lo| mujhe vizvAsa hai ki jitanI rakama dene kA tuma vAdA kara pAye ho utanI rakama unameM se nikala pAegI / suna kara nagara seTha ne mAtAjI ko praNAma kiyA aura kahA ki jaisI ApakI prAjJA hai vaisA hI maiM kruuNgaa| ve carU havelI ke kisa tahakhAne meM, kahA~ gar3e hue the isakA patA kevala isa vRddha seTAnI ho ko thA, nagara seTha ko bhI isakA koI patA nahIM thA / seThAnI ne jAkara vaha tahakhAnA batalAyA aura tadnusAra seTha ne use khudavA kara ve gar3e hue carU bAhara nikalavAye / una rupayoM ko boroM meM bhare gaye to sATha bore unase bhare / seTha ne boroM kA vajana karake aMdAja lagAyA to pratyeka bore meM eka lAkha jitane rupaye mAlUma diye / seTha bar3A harSita huA aura

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( 28 ) socA ki mere vacana kA pAlana ho jAyagA aura isa taraha nagara nivAsI janoM kA saMkaTa bhI dUra ho jAyagA / merI jovana prapaMca kathA dUsare dina sATha U~ToM para ve bore lAde gaye aura pUre lavAjame ke sAtha hajAroM nagara janoM ko sAtha lekara nagaraseTha usa saradAra kI chAvanI kI tarapha cale aura kucha dUrI para jA kara Thahara gaye / saradAra ko kahalAyA ki ujjaina nagara ke saba mahAjana aura bar3e prajAjana ApakI mAMga ko pUrA karane ke liye Aye hue haiM / grApa chAvanI se bAhara Akara una saba prajAjanoM se mileM aura bAtacIta kareM / saradAra turanta uThakara apane khemeM se nikala kara bAhara AyA kucha do cAra aMga rakSakoM ke sAtha mahAjanoM ke sammukha grAkara unase mujarA Adi jo kucha karane kA rivAja thA vaisA karake bolA ki Apa ujjaina ke prajAjanoM kA darzana kara maiM bahuta grAnandita huA hai / taba prajAjanoM ke mukhiyAtroM ne hAtha jor3akara kahA ki saradAra sA0 ApakI paise kI mAMga ko pUrI karane ke liye hamAre nagara ke seTha sATha U~Ta bharakara rupaye lAye haiN| jinako Apa svIkAra kareM aura Apa inako lekara turanta hI apanI senA meM DhaDherA piTAvAdeM ki ve turanta yahA~ se vApasa lauTa jAya / ApakI senA jaba taka ravAnA nahIM ho jAtI taba taka hama saba loga yahA~ baiThe raheMge / sunakara saradAra ne turanta apanI senA ke kamANDara ko hukma diyA ki turanta saba senA taiyAra hokara yahA~ se calade / senA ko jo kucha khAne pIne ko denA hai vaha maiM yahA~ se jAne ke bAda agale par3Ava meM dU~gA- ityAdi rasma pUrI huI aura senA ne turanta vahA~ se anyatra kUca karadI | zAma ko saba nagara jana seTha sAhaba ko sAtha lekara unake ghara Aye aura isa prakAra nagara kI rakSA ke liye seThane jo pradbhuta udAratA dikhAI - usake liye abhivAdana kiyaa| dUsare dina sAre nagara meM isakI khuzI meM bar3A utsava manAyA gayA / zrAvakoM ke mukha havelI, seTha ke nagara seTha kI yaha kathA ujjaina ke purAne vRddha hamane suno| hama jaba ujjaina cAturmAsa meM the taba una nagara seTha kI vaha kuTumba kI zrArthika zravanati ke kAraNa nilAma kI gaI jisako kisI bhI nagara nivAsI ne nahIM lI / kaI dinoM bAda bAhara ke kisI paise vAle ne Akara pAnI ke mUlya meM use kharAdA / usa havelI meM zIzama kI

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (26) lakar3I ke saha khambhe aura chata ke pATa Adi the / arthAt vaha eka purAne jamAne kI bahumUlya vAlI havelo samajho jAtI thii| maiMne isa havelI ko eka bAra jA kara apanI AMkhoM se dekhA thA / ujjaina ke caturmAsa ke prArambha hone para tapasvIjI mahArAja apane varSoM ke abhyAsAnusAra pacapana yAM sATha divasa ke upavAsa karane prArambha kara diye| jinakI samApti bhAdrapada meM paryuSaNa ke bAda hotI thii| tapasvIjI kI dIrgha tapasyA ko AsapAsa ke pradeza meM kAphI prasiddhi huA karatI thI aura jisako jAnakara saiMkar3oM zrAvaka, zrAvikAyeM tapasvIjI ke darzana vandana karane nimitta pAte jAte the| tapasvIjI mahArAja hamezA subaha ghaNTA Der3ha ghaNTA vyAkhyAna dete rahate the| unakA zarIra acchA sugaThita thA / ThiMganA kada thA / varNa se zyAma thA / AvAja unako acchI thI, jisase DhAla, caupAI Adi gAne meM unako koI kaThinAI nahIM hotI thii| tapasyA ke antima dinoM taka unake zarIra meM khAsa koI thakAvaTa ke cinha dikhAI nahIM dete the / paricita zrAvaka janoM kI jAna pahacAna ve kAphI rakhate the| jisase darzana vandana karane vAle bhAI bahinoM ko ve turaMta pahacAna lete the aura unake nAma gotrAdi tathA kuTumbI janoM ke bAre meM bhI apanI jAnakArI jatA dete the| isa taraha tapasvIjI kA paricita zrAvaka varga kApho thA aura ve usake darzanArtha tapasyA ke nimitta sadA pAyA karate the / ujjaina ke cAturmAsa meM bhI yahI krama calatA rahA / pAraNA ke nimitta adhika saMkhyA meM bhAI bahina upasthita ho jAte the| tapasvojI mahArAja kA maiM sabase choTA ziSya thA aura kucha par3hane likhane meM adhika rUci rakhane vAlA thA, isaliye kaI zrAvaka loga mujha se bhI paricaya karate rahate the / maiM apanA sUtroM ko paThana kA niyamita kAryakrama karatA rahatA thaa| usa samaya taka maiMne dazavaikAlika, uttarAdhyayana sUtra, sUya gar3AMga sUtra kA prathama zru ta skaMdha-kaThasya kara liye the / koI paccIsa, tosa thokar3e bhI jabAnI yAda kara liye the| kucha sUtroM ko pratilipi kA kAma bhA karatA rahatA thA / ujjaina ke usa sthAnaka meM tapasvIjI mahArAja kI sampradAya kA kucha purAnA grantha saMgraha rakhA huA thA / jisako maiM dhIre dhIre dekhA karatA thA, ina granthoM meM prAyaH sUtra hI adhika the aura jo dezI bhASA meM likhita TabbArtha vAle the / grantha bahuta purAne nahIM the / unameM do tIna aise purAne grantha the jo saMskRta TokA ke sAtha the / ve grantha tIna sau cArasI varSa jitane purAne the / unameM eka 'uvavAI sUtra' eka rAyapazenI sUtra aura eka antagar3hadazA sUtra ko saMskRta TIkA sameta pratiyAM thii| eka acchI purAnI bar3I sI prati thI jo bahuta sundara lipi meM tripAThI ke rUpa meM likhI huI thii| usakA zAyada kucha antima bhAga nahIM thaa| usa prati ke bAMye hAMsiye

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( 30 ) para sUDa su0 aisA usakA nAma likhA huA thA / cUMki maiM taba saMskRta bhASA se sarvathA aparicita thA, isaliye usakA viSaya Adi kyA hai, usakA mujhe kucha jJAna nahIM ho sakA / maiM kevala sUr3a * zabda ko par3ha sakA- prAge kA jo sU0 akSara thA usako maiMne kalpanA se samajhA ki yaha koI sUDa0 sUtra nAma kA khAsa grantha hai isakA artha samajhAne vAlA vahAM koI nahIM thA / isaliye meM bahuta varSo taka sUDa0 sUtra ko yAda rakhatA rahA / merI jovana prapaMca kathA isI grantha saMgraha ke sAtha eka purAne lakar3I ke bakse meM kucha chupI huI pustakeM rakhI huI maiMne dekhI unameM dazavaikAlika aura uttarAdhyayana sUtra kI mUla pATha vAlI chapI pustikAe~ prathama bAra maiMne dekhI / kucha thokar3oM ke saMgraha vAlI bhI eka chapI huI pustikA mere dekhane meM AI / maiMne unako apane pAsa rakha liyA / unameM eka purAne litho presa meM gujarAtI akSaroM meM chapI eka pustaka maiMne dekhI, jisakA nAma 'paMca pratikramaNAdi sUtra' meM par3ha sakA / usa sampradAya meM pracalita kevala eka hI pratikramaNa sUtra kA mujhe jJAna thA / ye paMca pratikramaNa kauna se haiM aura inakA kyA viSaya hai isakA mujhe koI jJAna nahIM huA / una pustakoM ke sAtha kucha do cAra baDI chapo pustakeM bhI mere dekhane meM AI / jinake nAma - 1. jaina tattvAdarza, 2. tattva nirNaya prAsAda, 3. ajJAnatimira bhAskara Adi the / ye pustakeM zrI AtmArAmajI urpha zrI vijayAnaMda sUri kI banAI huI thii| ina pustakoM ko to maiMne apane ujjaina vAle antima caumAse meM par3hI jisakA varNana usa prasaMga meM kiyA jAyagA / ujjaina ke cAturmAsa meM eka vicitra ghaTanA kA anubhava jisa cAturmAsa kA meM yaha varNana likha rahA hU~, usameM eka nava dIkSita sAdhvI ke jIvana kI karuNAjanaka vicitra ghaTanA kA anubhava huA / usa samaya ukta sampradAya ke anugAmI sAdhvI-varga kI cAra pAMca sAdhviyoM kA vahA~ cAturmAsa thA / unakA sthAnaka bhI usI lUNamaNDI galI meM, sAdhutroM ke sthAnaka se koI pA~ca dasa makAnoM ke bAda thaa| mukhyA sAdhvIjI acchI praur3ha umara vAlI thI aura unakI tIna cAra celiyAM thI / kyoMki sAdhviyAM tapasvIjI mahArAja ke gurU sampradAya kI thI, isaliye unakA bhaktibhAva tapasvI jI Adi sAdhuoM kI tarapha honA svAbhAvika hI thA / isa nAte mujha para bhI unako zraddhA

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava bharI dRSTi kA honA svAbhAvika thaa| ye sAdhviyAM hamezA vyAkhyAna sunane ke nimitta tathA tapasvI jI Adi sAdhunoM ke vandana nimitta hamAre sthAnaka meM prAto jAtI thIM / inako eka do celiyAM 'jo choTI umra kI thIM unakI par3hAI Adi ke bAre meM bhI maiM kabhI kucha pUchatA rahatA thA / ___ merA svabhAva kucha saMkocazIla hone ke kAraNa ve mujha se apane mAtA pitA Adi ke bAre meM kucha pUchatI to maiM usakA javAba nahIM detA thaa| usa bar3I sAdhvI ne eka daphA yoM ho kahA ki Apa to hamAre gurU prAmnAya ke sampradAya meM pUjyajI baneMge ityAdi / kabhI kabhI koI bAteM unase ho jAyA karatI thI / una sAdhvI ke pAsa eka nava dIkSitA kizorI sAdhvI thI, jisane koI chaha ATha mahine pahile hI dIkSA lI thii| vaha nava-dokSitA kiso brAhmaNa kI vidhavA putrI thii| usake pitA ke ghara meM usako mA~ vidhavA thI aura usakA eka pATha dasa varSa kA choTA bhAI thaa| usa bAI kA vivAha hone ke bAda thor3e hI dinoM meM usakA pati mara gayA aura vaha koI 15, 16 varSa kI umra meM vidhavA ho gaI / pitA aura zvasura kula grAmavAso sAmAnya nirdhana samajhA jAne vAlA brAhmaNa kuTumba thaa| yajamAna vRtti se ve apanA nirvAha kiyA karate the / ukta bAI ke vidhavA ho jAne para zvasura vAle devara jeTha usakA tiraskAra aura avahelanA grAdi karate rahe / jisase vaha trasta ho kara apanI mA~ ke pAsa caTho gaI prora vahIM usake pAsa raho lgaa| kucha dinoM bAda ukta sAdhviyAM usa gAMva meM vUmatA phiratA jA phuNcii| gAMva meM dasa bosa zrAvakoM ke ghara the aura vahAM para sAdhviyoM kA pAnA kabhI kabhI huA karatA thaa| isaliye grAmavAsI zrAvaka jana una sAdhviyoM kI bhaktibhAva se sevA upAsanA karate rahate the / sAdhvojI bhAI bahinoM ko dharmopadeza nimitta kucha DAla, caugAI Adi sunAyA karatI thii| ukta brAhmaNa kuTumba kI ve donoM mA~ beTI bhI sAdhvo jI ke pAsa, zrAvikA bahinoM ke sAtha pAtI jAtI rahatI thii| sAdhvojo ko ukta brAhmaNa bAI ke sAtha Ane vAlI kizora vaya kI vidhavA putrI ke bAre meM kucha jAnane ko jijJAsA huI / vaha kizorI bAI kucha svarUpavAna bhI thI / bola cAla meM kucha capalA bhI thI aura usakA kaMu bho acchA madhura thA / sAdhvojo ko jaba usakI sthiti kA kucha jJAna huA to unake mana meM sahaja lAlasA utpanna ho AI ki yadi yaha bAI hamArI ziSyA bana jAyeM to isakA bhI janma sudhara jAegA aura hamako bhI eka accho ziSyA mila jaaegii|

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( 32 ) prAyaH jaina sAdhu sAdhviyoM ko aise bAla vaya vAle kizora yuvaka aura yuvatiyoM ko dekha kara unake mana meM apane celA-celI banAne kI lAlasA utpanna hotI rahatI hai, aise aneka anu bhava hameM hue haiM / ukta sAdhvIjI ne dhIre dhIre apane snigva prema se usa kizorI ko sAdhvI ho jAne kI preraNA kI / usakI mAtA ko yaha bAta jJAta huI to usane bhI usa bAre meM apanI sahamati dikhAI / mAtA ne socA veTI bAla vidhavA hai na sAsare meM na pohara meM ho koI rakSA karane vAlA 1 ho jAtI hai to merI chAtI para kA zAla miTa karatI rahU~gI / beTo javAna hone para na jAne kisa preraNA do ki tuma ina sAdhvojI kI ziSyA bana sArI jindagI acchI taraha khAna pAna milatA rahegA yadi yaha isa prakAra ina sAdhvIjI kI celI jAyagA yoM maiM kaba taka isakA bharaNa poSaNa rAste car3ha jAya, ataH usane bhI beTI ko jaao| isase terA janma sudhara jAyagA aura ityAdi / mero jIvana prapaMca ka khera, usa kizorI ne usI gAMva meM sAdhvI jI ke pAsa sAmAnya rUpa se dIkSA lelI auaura sAdhvI kA veza pahana liyaa| kucha dina bAda sAdhvIjI vahA~ se vihAra kara gaI aura kaI gAMvoM meM ghUmatI phiratA ve ukta prakAra se tarastrIjI mahArAja ke kAraNa ujjaina meM cAturmAsa ke liye Akara raha gaI / gurUNI sAdhavIjI apanI nava dIkSitA ziSyA kI tarapha kucha vizeSa anurAga dikhAne lagI, jisakI IrSyA anya cailiyoM ko hone lagI / vaha dIkSitA kizorI caMcala svabhAva kI thI aura kucha teja mijAja vAlI bhI thI / anya sAdhviyAM jaba usakI tarapha koI kaTAkSa bharo bAteM karatI to vaha unakA vaisA hI javAba detI rahatI thI / yoM dhIre dhIre unameM paraspara vaimanAya bar3hatA gayA / gurUNIjI bhI usako vaisA na karane ke liye kucha kaThora zabdoM meM- upAlaMbha bhI dene lagI / yoM kucha dina bItane ke bAda bhAdrapada mahine meM sira ke kezoM kA luMcana karane kA samaya AyA / jaina sAdhu sAdhviyoM ke prAcAra meM kezoM kA lucana karane kI sabase adhika kaSTa dAyaka kaThina kriyA hai / hara chaha mahine meM yaha keza luMcana kriyA ko jAtI hai / choTI umra ke bAla dIkSitoM ke liye bhI isa AcAra kA pAlana Avazyaka hotA hai / isa keza luMcana ke kaSTa se kaI bAla dIkSita sAdhu veza chor3a kara bhAga jAte haiM / aisA aneka bAra hotA rahatA hai / maiMne bhI aise vyaktiyoM ko dekhA hai / merA prathama keza loca huA taba mujhe bhI yaha bahuta kaSTadAyaka anubhUta huA, parantu maiMne apane

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava kucha manobala kA aura kucha vicAra ko dRr3hatA kA sahArA lekara dhIre dhIre usa kaSTa ko sahaja bhAva se sahana kara liyA / isakA kucha vargana agale prakaraNa meM diyA jA rahA hai / bAta to maiM ukta kizoro mAdhvo ke keza lucana kI kara rahA hU~ / jaba guNo sAdhvI jI ne usake kezoM kA lova karanA cAhA to vaha bilkula inkAra kara gaI / yoM usake veza chaha pATha mahino ke kAraNa kApho bar3e ho gaye the| dikhane meM Aja kI nava taruNiyAM jisa prakAra baoNba kaTa karAtI rahatI hai, vaise hI usake sira ke keza divAI dete the / gurUgo sAdhvojI ne usake kezoM kA loca karanA bar3I muzkila se prArambha kiyA to do cAra cAkI ve za ukhAr3ane ke sAtha ho vaha cillA uThatI aura uThakara khar3I ho jAto / sAdhvojo ko bar3A dharmasaMkaTa mAlUma diyaa| vaha kisI taraha keza loca karAne ko tatsara nahIM huI aura isake liye use kucha mArapITa bhI sahano par3I-ityAdi kAraNoM se trasta hokara vaha gA cU, bhAga jAne kI bAta socane lagI / parantu jAya kahA~ ? sarvayA vyavahAra se abodha thii| kahIM koI sahArA nahIM thA / kisI prakAra usane eka gRhastha kI kanyA ke dvArA apane sasurAla meM samAcAra bhijavAyA ki mujhe tuma yahA~ pAkara kaSTa se chur3A le jAyo / sasurAla meM se usakA koI devara thA jeTha do cAra dina bAda vahA~ pahu~cA / usako patA nahIM thA ki mero bhojAI kahA~ para hai aura kisa avasthA meM hai / idhara udhara patA lagAne para mA nUma huA ki lUNamaNDo meM eka dharma sthAnaka hai jahA~ kucha sAdhviyAM rahatI haiM, vahIM vaha hogii| kucha sA~jha ho gaI thii| vaha usa sthAnaka ke bAhara pAyA aura pUchane lagA ki yahA~ koI jaina sAdhvI hai| sAdhviyoM ne andara sunA ki bAhara koI pUcha rahA hai| vaha nava-dIkSita sAdhvI samajha gaI ki mujhe koI lene AyA hai / parantu gurUgIjI sAdhvo turanta rahasya samajha gaI aura vaha sovane lagI ki yadi koI purUSa mAkara isa ziSyA ko yahA~ se le jAne kA prayatna karegA to usameM hamArI kucha phajihata hogii| isaliye unhoMne usa AdamI ko kiso bahina dvArA kahalA diyA ki yahA~ rAta ke samaya kiso purUSa kA pAnA manA hai| kala puvaha dina ko pAnAityAdi / __ sAdhvIjI ne socA ki aba ise kahIM kisI dUsarI jagaha chipA denA caahiye| jisase kala koI phajihata kA maukA na Ave yaha soca kara sAdhvojI ne hamAre sthAnaka kA eka buDhDhA nokara thA usako bulavAyA aura kahA ki usa chorI sAdhvo kA dimAga kucha kharAba ho gayA hai isaliye tuma isako abhI bar3e sthAnaka meM cupacApa le jAyo aura vahA~ para sthAnaka kI tIsarI

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( 34 ) merI jovana prapaMca kathA maMjila meM ekAMta sA khaparela ke nIce kA bhAga hai, usameM le jA kara rkho| kala isakI vyavasthA ko jAyagI / phira usa nava-dIkSitA ko DarA-dhamakA kara usa bur3he nokara ke sAtha bar3e sthAnaka meM bhijavA dI / nokara ne bhI use acchI taraha DarAyA dhamakAyA isaliye vaha Dara ke mAre cupacApa sthAnaka meM calI AI aura sthAnaka ke pichale bhAga meM jo Upara jAne vAlA choTA sA jInA thA, usameM hokara use vahA~ rakha diyA / vaha ardha-mUcchita sI ho gaI thii| hamako to isakA kucha patA nahIM thA / parantu zAyada tapasvIjI mahArAja ko isakA patA thA / sArI rAta vaha bAI vahA~ usI dazA meM rotI huI, sisakatI huI par3I rhii| dUsare dina subaha sAdhvIjI bar3e sthAnaka meM AI aura Upara usake pAsa gaI, usako kucha mIThe vacanoM se kahane lago / parantu usane haTha pakar3a lo aura kahane lagI ki mujhe tuma apanI mA~ ke pAsa bheja do / maiM aba tumhAre pAsa kisI taraha nahIM rahanA cAhato / udhara dUsare dina vaha AdamI pUchate pAyA to use kaha diyA ki vaha to rAta hI ko yahA~ se gupacupa kisI ke sAtha bhAga gaI hai, hameM kucha bhI patA nahIM hai-ityAdi / udhara sAdhvIjI ne pAkara tapasvIjI mahArAja se sArA kissA kaha sunAyA / taba maiMne tapasvI jI se kahA ki jaba isakI icchA sAdhvIjI ke pAsa rahane kI nahIM hai to ise isako mAtA ke pAsa bheja denA hI hamArA dayAmaya dharma kA kAma hai| ityAdi kucha bAteM kaha kara eka proDha zrAvikA ko bulAkara kahA ki tuma strI ke pahanane lAyaka kucha kapar3e lAkara isa bAI ko pahanA do aura gupacupa isako sTezana para le jAkara TikaTa kaTavA kara gAr3I meM biThA do, jisase yaha apane gAMva, apanI mA~ ke pAsa calI jAya / kucha 5, 7 rupaye bhI isako de do / tadnusAra vaisA kiyA gayA aura usa bAI ko gAr3I meM biThAkara ravAnA kara diyA gyaa| keza-laMcana viSayaka kucha vicAra yU to jaina sAdhuoM kA AcAra-dharma anya sabhI sAdhu sanyAsiyoM ke prAcAra-dharma se adhika kaThina hai / isake pAlana meM bahuta kucha AtmasaMyama aura indriyadamana kI AvazyakatA evaM apekSA rahatI hai / jaina sAdhu kI jIvana caryA kaisI hotI hai-isakA kucha sUcana hamane yathA sthAna kiyA

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava aura Age bhI kareMge / yahA~ para prasaMga vaza hama keza lucana ke viSaya meM kucha anubhava janya lAra pradarzita karanA cAhate haiM / / jaina sAdhuoM ke prAcAroM meM keza-lucana vAlI kriyA sabase kaThina samajhI jAtI hai / yoM ina sAdhu kA jIvana eka prakAra se sabase adhika sukhI jIvana hai| jaina sAdhu kA veza pahana lene para | kara usako na koI kamAne khAne ko cintA rahatI hai, na kisI prakAra ke zArIrika parizrama karane kI AvazyakatA rahatI hai, na usako apane kuTumba kabole ke pAlana ko ho koI cintA hotI hai| sAdhu-veza pahana lene ke bAda usako hamezA acchA khAna-pAna milatA rahatA hai-jo usako bhikSA dvArA bhakta logoM ke yahAM se sammAna pUrvaka milatA rahatA hai| vaha sadaiva subaha zAma icchAnusAra yatheSTa bhojana karatA rahatA hai| usako pahanane praur3hane ke liye yatheSTa acche vastrAdi milate rahate haiM aura rahane ke liye acche makAnAta ! vaha apanI icchAnusAra deza paryaTana karatA rahatA hai aura eka praka ra se ArAmadAyaka jIvana vyatIta karatA hai / gRhasthoM ke yahA~ jAkara khAna pAna Adi yogya vastue~ vaha bhikSA rUpa meM le AtA hai| bImAro Adi meM bhakta loga usakI yatheSTa paricaryA karate rahate haiM aura ina sAdhuoM meM jo koI adhika yogyatA vAlA hotA hai aura vyAkhyAna prAdi kalA meM kucha nipuNa hotA hai to samAja meM usako bar3A sammAna milatA rahatA hai / kabhI kabhI airo sAdhanoM ke hajAroM dhanika loga bhata bho bana jAte haiM / isa prakAra ke sukho sAdhu jIvana meM kabhI kabhI kaI nava-dIkSitoM ko jo kAI adhika kaSTa dAyaka kriyA kA pAlana karane kA prasaga upasthita hotA rahatA hai vaha keza-lucana viSayaka kriyA hai| ___ jaina sAdhu ke zAstrokta prAcAra dharma meM yaha vidhAna hai ki sAdhu (sAdhu aura sAdhvI donoM kA artha hai ) kama se kama varSa bhara meM eka bAra avazya sira para uge hue kezoM kA lucana kre| anya dharma ke bAbA, sanyAsI Adi kI taraha jaTA bar3hAne se usameM jU Adi ko utpatti hoto hai aura usakA parihAra karanA hiMsA-sUcaka kArya hai| isa kAraNa jaina sAdhu ko apane mastaka ke aora purUSa ko dAr3hI mUcha ke bhI kezoM kA lucana varSa meM eka bAra to avazya karanA cAhiye / anya sAdhu sanyAsiyoM kI taraha vaha nAI yA hajjAma se kezoM kA muNDana yA kartana karA nahIM sakate / kyoMki vaha gRhastha dvArA karAnA hotA hai jo sAdhu ke liye anAcAra rUpa hai / isa prakAra sAdhu ko keza lucana karanA anivArya hotA hai aura usakA pAlana jaina sAdhu sampradAya meM ka.ma me kama jahA~ taka merA jJAna hai sthAnaka vAsI sampradAya ke sAdhu varga meM to avazya hotA rahatA thA /

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( 36 ) parantu kaI kacce pakke nava-dIkSita sAdhu isa kaSTa dAyaka kriyA ko sahana na kara sakane ke kAraNa lAcAra hokara sAdhu veza kA parityAga bhI kara dete haiM / isa prakAra ke kaI udAharaNa mere anubhava meM Aye haiM / merA prathama loca, dhAra vAle caumAse meM huA / isa samaya mere keza kAphI lambe ho gaye the / caumAse meM paryuSaNa ke pahale hI keza lucana kara DAlane kI prathA cAlu hai / hama tapastrIjI sameta pA~ca sAdhu the jisameM tIna to bar3I umra vAle the aura maiM tathA motIlAlajI choTI umra ke the / tapasvIjI mahArAja ke sira para to ine gine bAla the / acaladAsajI aura munnAlAlajI kAphI bar3I umra ke the aura unake sira para kezoM kA koI adhika bharAva nahIM thA / loca vAle dinoM meM pahale una tInoM bar3e sAdhutroM ne Apasa meM eka dUsare ne apanA keza luMcana kara liyA / aba bArI AI hama donoM choTe sAdhutroM kI / motIlAlajI mujha se kucha pahale dIkSita ho gaye the isaliye unakA do tIna bAra keza luMcana ho cukA thA / parantu jisa samaya unake kezoM kA lucana karane ke liye unake pitA baiThe to motolAlajI ko adhika kaSTAnubhava karate hue maiMne dekhA / ve eka sAtha mastaka ke sAre kezoM kA luMcana karA nahIM sakate the / kaI dinoM meM dhore dhore unakA keza lucana kA kArya samApta huA / mero jIvana prapaMca kathA merA keza lucana karane ko tapasIjI ne mujhe biThAyA to maiM mana ko kar3A karake baiTha gayA / tapasIjI ne apane do ghuTanoM ke bIca merA sira dabA liyA aura ve rAkha bharI huI apanI cimaTI se mere sira kI coTI ke sthAna se dasa dasa bIsa bIsa bAla pakar3a kara ukher3ane lge| yUM tapasI jo loca kriyA karane meM nipuNa the / unakA hAtha jaldI jaldI kAma karatA thA aura cimaTo meM jitane bAla pakar3a lete the unako ukhAr3e binA ve nahIM chor3ate the / kaI sAdhu isa prakAra haiM aura unake pAsa aise kaI naye sAdhutroM ko luMcana kriyA karAI jAtI hai / keza luMcana kriyA meM acche nipuNa hote mujhe prathama bAra kI lUMcana kriyA meM kAphI kaSTAnubhava hotA rahA thA / parantu maiMne kisI prakAra apane kaSTa kA bhAva vyakta na hone diyA / tapasI jI Adhe sira kA loca kiye bAda bole ki jo adhika dukha hotA ho to prAjaitanA hI kara liyA jaay| do tIna dina bAda phira bAkI kA loca kara leMge / maiMne socA ki bAra bAra aisA dukha mana meM sahana karanA - isakI apekSA eka baiThaka hI use pUrA kara lenA acchA hai / maiMne tapasIjI ko kahA grApa isI samaya pUrA loca kara DAleM / koI do tIna ghaMTe meM vaha kriyA pUrI ho gaI / -

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava bAda ke varSoM meM to maiM dhIre dhIre usa kaSTa kriyA se abhyasta ho gayA thA aura mana meM kucha vairAgya bhAva bhI dRr3ha hotA gayA / isa liye usa bAre meM mujhe adhika vicAra karane kI AvazyakatA nahIM zrAI / ( 37 ) jaba maiMne mUrtipUjaka saMvegI mArga kA sAdhuveza paridhAna kiyA taba bhI yaha lAkriyA hotI rahI / Age calakara to maiM svayaM apanA keza luMcana apane hI hAthoM se kara DAlatA thA / para yaha to Age kI kathA kA viSaya hai / kahane kA tAtparya yaha hai ki jaina sAdhutroM ke pracAra meM keza lucana kA eka sabase adhika kaThina AcAra dharma samajhA jAtA hai aura yadi isa grAcAra dharma kA pAlana karane kI pratizavatA kA jora na hotA ho to Aja jitanI sakhyA meM jaina sAbu, sAdhvI dikhAI dete haiM usase kahIM adhika saMkhyA meM sAdhu sAdhvI banane ko loga taiyAra ho sakate haiM -- kyoMki sAmAnya rUpa se jaina sAdhu ke jaisA sukhI jIvana jIne kA anyatra durlabha hai / mahAkAlezvara ke maMdira kA darzana ujjaina meM jo mahAkAlezvara kA prasiddha maMdira hai, usako dekhane ko ekabAra mere mana meM icchA huI / zrAvaNa mahine ke pratyeka somavAra ko mahAkAlezvara ke maMdira se eka bar3A julUsa nikalatA thA aura usameM sarakArI bainDa pulisa pArTI aura ghur3asavAra Adi kA pUrA lavAjamA hotA thA / yaha julUsa ujjaina ke mukhya mukhya bAjAroM meM hotA huA, vApasa mahAkAlezvara ke mandira meM jAkara samApta hotA thaa| ujjaina meM usa samaya gvAliyara kI siMdhiyAM - sarakAra kA rAjya thA marAThA rAjazAhI zivabhakta hone ke kAraNa gvAliyara sarakAra kI ora se mahAkAlezvara kA yaha utsava bar3e ThATha se manAyA jAtA thA / maiMne pahale jaba bhairavI - dokSA lI thI, taba mahAkAlezvara ke darzana kaI bAra kiye the parantu usa samaya maMdira Adi ko Thoka taraha se dekhane kA koI prasaMga nahIM milA / maiMne yativara guru zrI devIhaMsajI se kucha sunA thA ki kalyANa maMdira stotra, jisako gurujI ne mujhe kaMThastha karavAyA thA, usake banAne vAle siddhasaina divAkara AcArya the / una prAcArya ne mahAkAlezvara ke maMdira meM baiThakara isa stotra kI racanA ko thI aura isake kAraNa isa madira meM jaina tIrthakara pArzvanAtha bhagavAna kI mUrti prakaTa huI / ise jaina loga prAvaMtI pArzvanAtha nAma se pUjate rahe haiM / yaha AvaMtI pArzvanAtha kA jaina maMdira bhI, hamAre lUNa maNDI vAle dharmasthAnaka se najadIka hI ke eka muhalle meM thA / parantu hama loga kabhI usa maMdira meM jAte nahIM the. kyoMki hamAre sampradAya meM mUrti pUjA pAkhaNDa svarUpa mAnI jAtI rahI hai / parantu mere mana meM yaha kautuhala rahA ki mahAkAlezvara maMdira ko jAkara andara se dekheM ki vaha kaisA banA huA hai| isa jijJAsA ke kAraNa hama ekadina munnAlAlajI aura motIlAlajI ke sAtha mahAkAlezvara ke maMdira ko dekhane gaye / maMdira kI kucha sIr3hiyA~ car3hakara

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( 38 ) mero jovana prapaMca kathA jaba usake mukhya dvAra para pahu~ce to vahAM baiThe hue, brAhmaNa pujArI ne jarA kaThora svara se pUchA ki "Dhiye mahArAja Apa yahA~ kyoM Aye haiM / " taba maiMne kahA ki-pujArIjI hama mandira ko andara jAkara dekhanA cAhate haiM / taba pujAro bolA ki Apa isa taraha nahIM jA sakate / pahale nadI meM jAkara hAtha paira dho pAyA aura bAda meM ApakI bagala meM jo yaha jhAr3a sA hai isako yahA~ rakhado ( hamAre pAsa lambI DaMDo vAlA jo ra noharaNa thA usako usa pujArI ne avajJA se jhADa batalAyA ) aura muha para yaha paTTI bA~dha rakhI hai, usako bhI kholakara yahA~ rakha do, phira mandira meM jA sakate ho ityAdi / pujArI ke ye vAkya sunakara hamako kucha krodha ho pAyA, aura hama vahA~ se vApasa lauTa Aye / ___mahAkAlezvara ke isa mandira ko andara se dekhane kA aura jo tIdhara svarUpa zivaliMga ke darzana karane kA prasaMga to mujhe kaI varSoM bAda prApta hunA, maiM ahamadAbAda ke gujara ta purAtattva mandira ke prAcArya pada kA kAma jaba saMbhAla rahA thA, taba ujjaina meM cAturmAsa rahe hue sva0 prasiddha vidvAn jaina muni zrI nyAyavijayajI ne mujhe Agraha karake milane ke lie ujjaina bulAyA thA aura maiM do, tIna dina vahA~ rahA thA, taba mahAkAlezvara ke mandira ke, cauMsaTha joganiyo ke sthAna ke tathA prAvaMtopArzvanAtha ke mandira ko dekhane kA bhI avasara prApta huprA / usa samaya mujhe mahAkAlezvara Adi ke vizeSa itihAsa kA koI jJAna nahIM thA / ujjaina ke prati merA kevala itanA hI AkarSaNa kA bhAva thA ki vaha vikrama rAjA kI rAjadhAnI thI / vaha vikrama rAjA jisa kSatriya vaMza meM merA janma huA hai usa paramAra vaMza kA bahuta bar3A rAjA thA / usane cauMsaTha joganiyoM aura bAvana vIroM ko prasanna kiyA thA ityAdi, kiMvadantiyA~ maiMne suna rakhI tho / prasiddha loka gIto meM jisa rAjA bharatharI hari kA prasaMga sunane meM AtA rahA hai / vaha rAjA bharatharI bhI ujjaina kA rAjA thA ityAdi / cAturmAsa kI samApti para hamane ujjaina se prasthAna kara devAsa hote hue indaura ko ora vihAra kiyA / ujjaina se dakSiNa deza kI ora vihAra tapasvIjI bahuta varSa pUrva dakSiNa deza meM vicare the jisa vakta ve dakSiNa meM vicare the usa

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava vakta unake sAtha meM ziSya parivAra nahIM thA aura ve apane eka bar3e gurUbhAI ke sAtha usa pradeza meM vicare the, tapasvIjI ke yaha bar3e gurUbhAI jinakA nAma campAlAlajI thA, ve adhikatara dakSiNa ke ahamadanagara jile meM vicarate rahate the / campAlAlajI acche vyAkhyAtA kahalAte the / unakI dharmopadeza dene kI kalA acche prakAra kI thI / bahuta varSo se dakSiNa meM hI vicarate rahane ke kAraNa marAThI bhASA kA unakA abhyAsa bahuta acchA ho gayA thaa| maiMne jaba unako dekhA tathA kucha samaya unake pAsa rahane kA bhI prasaMga AyA taba ve mauTetora para marAThI meM ho vyAkhyAna dete rahate the / jaina zrAvakoM ke sivAya aura dUsare dakSiNI loga bhI unakA dharmopadeza sunane ke lie mAyA karate the aura una vyAkhyAnoM meM ve mauTetaura para tukArAma aura nAmadeva jaise mahArASTrIya santoM ke abhaMgoM aura padoM ko acchI taraha gA gA kara sunAte aura una para sunane vAle logoM kA manoraMjana ho usa taraha pravacana kiyA karate the / isase kevala jaina logoM ke atirikta marAThe, brAhmaNa, pATIla Adi sabhI varNa ke loga unake pravacanoM meM ThIka saMkhyA meM prAte rahate the kabhI kabhI mAmalatadAra aura gAMva pATIla Adi kucha sarakArI nokara bhI unake vyAkhyAna sunane cale Ate the / ( 32 ) 1 tapasvI kezarImalajI unakA sAtha chor3akara jaba mAlave meM cale Ae aura ujjaina meM cAturmAsa kiyA vahAM para acaladAsajI nAmaka eka mAravAr3I zrosavAla ko dIkSA dekara apanA prathama ziSya banAyA / usake bAda ve indaura nagara meM cAturmAsa rhe| vahA~ eka savAla pitA putra ko apane pAsa dokSita kiyaa| pitA kA nAma munnAlAlajo thA ve lagabhaga 45 varSa kI umra ke the unakA gharabhaMga hojAne se unhoMne apane 11-12 varSIya putra motolAla ke sAtha dIkSA grahaNa kI / jaba maiMne 1959 meM digThANa meM dIkSA lI thI, usake bAraha mahine pahale unhoMne dIkSA lI thI / munnAlAlajI sAmAnya par3he likhe the aura koI vyavahArika yA dUsarA jJAna nahIM thA / bAlaka motIlAla bilkula paDhA likhA nahIM thA / dIkSA grahaNa karane ke bAda sAdhunoM kI paripATI ke anusAra jJAna upArjana karane kA zurU kiyA thaa| bar3e ziSya pracaladAsajI ne do-eka varSa pUrva dIkSA lI thI magara khAsa kucha par3he-likhe nahIM the. maiMne kina saMyogoM aura kisa sthiti meM digThANa meM dIkSA lI thI, usakA varNana * pahale likhI gaI jIvana kathA ke antima pRSThoM meM diyA gayA hai / tapasvIjI, kezarImalajI ke ukta tona ziSyoM se maiM kucha acchI sI hindI par3ha aura samajha sakatA thA / yati saMsarga ke kAraNa kucha aura bhI stutI strotoM kA pATha jAnatA thA / una sAdhutroM ko usakI - kucha bhI jJAna nahIM thA /

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( 40 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA tapasvI jI kezarImalajI bhI kucha khAsa abhyAsI nahIM the, parantu lambe samaya ke dIkSita hone se aura unake gurU rAmaratanajI jo samudAya ke eka pratiSThA pAtra sAdhu mAne jAte the unake pAsa kitaneka sUtroM aura thokar3oM jaise bhASA prakaraNoM kA jJAna prApta kiyA thA / sAdhuoM kI paripATI ke anusAra apanA vyavahAra calAne ko dRSTi se dezI bhASAoM meM race hue kucha purAne stavanoM, svAdhyAyo, DhAloM, chandoM vagairaha kA bhI paricaya prApta kiyA thA aura caumAse meM yA kucha dUsare sthAnoM para upadeza sunane ke lie Ane vAle bhAI bahanoM ke prAge DhAla, caupAI, cauDhAlIyeM vagairaha ko gA gA kara usake upara kucha pravacana vagairaha karate rahate the| thor3e AgamoM ko bhI bhASaNa ke TabArtho ke sahAre samajhate-samajhAte rahate the / para maiMne dIkSA lene ke bAda 2-3 varSa kyA kiyA aura kisakA abhyAsa karane lagA, usakA varNana upara diyA jA cukA hai / tapasvI jI kezarImalajI kA vicAra huaA ki unake pAsa hama jaise tIna cAra ziSya haiM isalie sabako sAtha lekara dakSiNa meM rahane vAle apane bar3e guru bhAI ukta zrI campAlAlajI se milane jAveM kAraNa ki campAlAlajI ke pAsa koI khAsa ziSya nahIM thaa| isa bi vAra se tapasIjI ne ujjaina ke cAturmAsa ke bAda dakSiNa kI ora vihAra karane kA vicAra kiyA aura indaura pahuMce / indaura meM mahine do mahine rahane kA prasaga prApta huprA / indaura meM munnAlAlajI ke bhAI kA vicitra prasaMga indaura meM mahine do mahine rahane kA prasaMga prApta huaa| munnAlAlajI kA choTA bhAI jo kucha jyAdA cAlAka baniyA sA thA vaha milane ke lie AyA / munnAlAlajI ne usako samajhAyA ki tuma bhI hamAre sAtha sAdhu ho jAno, aura apana tInoM eka kuTumba ke samudAya jaise raheMge, vagairaha / usakI vizeSa carcA to maiM nahIM karatA parantu usane dIkSA lene kA barAbara dikhAvA kiyA / indaura ke zrAvaka jana jo tapasvI kezarImalajI ke bhakta kahalAte the, unhoMne dIkSA mahotsava kI bhI taiyArI kI, aura hamezA ke rivAjAnusAra pAMca sAta dina kA utsava Adi kA prasaMga bhI banAyA gyaa| eka dina bar3A julUsa nikAla kara usako sthAnaka meM hI dokSA dI gii| dIkSA lene ke vakta aneka prakAra ke mUlyavAna vastra bhI usako pahanAye gye| dIkSA lene ke bAda jaba usane sAdhu ke kapar3e pahana lie aura ve jo jarI vagairaha ke kImato vastra utAra diye the, unako zrAvakoM ne usa samaya gaThar3I meM bA~dhakara usa rAta ke lie vahAM usI sthAnaka ke eka kone meM rakha chor3e the aisA socakara ki kala jisake vahAM se ye kImatI kapar3e lAe gaye haiM usako vApasa lauTA diye jAyeMge / vaha bhAI jisane khUba ThATha-pATha se dIkSA lI thI usa rAta ko hama sabake so jAne ke bAda

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava bAraha baje ke karoba uThakara baiThA huA / usakA saMthArA bichaunA) usake bar3e bhAI munnAlAlajo ke pAsa hI karane meM pAyA thaa| eka tarapha bAlaka motIlAla bhI soyA huA thA tapasvIjI tayA acaladAsajI sthAnaka ke eka dUsare kone meM soye hue the| sthAnaka meM do sIdiyA thI, eka pAge se pAne kI aura dUsarI pIche se pAne kI, jisake dvArA zrAvikAyeM prAtI jAtI rahato thiiN| bAraha eka baje navadIkSita ne apane bar3e bhAI ko jagAkara kahA- "bhAI sAhaba mere peTa meM khUba darda ho rahA hai, mujhe TaTTI jAne ko hAjata horahI hai|" sthAnaka meM to aNdher| hI thA, diyA batI kA nAmonizAna bhI nahIM thaa| isalie munnAlAjI ne kahA ki isa pichalI sIr3hiyoM se nIce utara kara pAsa vAlo jo galI hai usameM TaTTI ho Ayo / munnAlAlajI nIMda meM the, vaha bhAI, apane pAsa meM rakhe hue jarI vagairaha ke kapar3oM ko saMbhAlakara rakhI huI bar3I sI gaTharI ko uThAkara apanI bagala meM dabAkara jhaTa se pIche kI sIr3hiyoM dvArA nIce utara gayA aura pAsa vAlI galI meM hokara nau-do gyAraha ho gyaa| ghaMTA, Der3ha ghaMTA bIta gayA para bhAI vApasa kyoM na AyA usakI phikara meM munnAlAlajI uThe maura prathama to pichalI sIr3hiyoM se nIce utara kara galI meM idhara udhara dekhane lage ki bhAI kahIM TaTTI jAne ko baiThA hai yA nahIM ? unhone usakA nAma lekara grAvAja bhI do, magara koI uttara nahIM milA taba unhoMne prAkara tapasvIjI ko jagAyA aura bhAI ke guma ho jAne kI bAta khii| tapa-vIjI ko jarura bar3A grAghAta lagA thA unhoMne hameM bhI jgaayaa| parantu unako isa bAta kI jAnakArI to taba huI ki vaha bhAI ve saba kImatI vastra uThAkara ravAnA ho gayA hai / vaha jA sthAnaka (upAzraya) thA usake nIce ke bhAga meM koI rahatA nahIM thA / eka bur3hA naukara jo ki sApha-saphAI karane ke lie rahatA thA, usako jagAne, maiM aayaa| magara usane to ThaDe kaleje se uttara diyA ki mahArAja maiM kyA jAnU ? maiM aisI aMdherI rAtri meM ja kara kisako jagAU, aura kahUM vagairaha subaha hone para khabara nikalavAnA / dUsare sAdhuzrA ko kyA lagA hogaa| usakI to mujhe khAsa koI kalpanA nahIM aayii| paraMtu mere mana meM to eka aghaTita ghaTanA sI ho gayI aisA mahasusa huA, bichaune meM baiThe-2 navakAra maMtra kA jApa karane lagA, aisA kahane meM pAyA thA ki koI akalpita ghaTanA sI hotI mAlUma ho to navakAra mantra kA jApa karate rahanA cAhiye / subaha huI hama saba sAdhuoM ne pratikramaNa aura paDiledANA vagairaha kriyAeM kIM / itane meM sthAnaka ke usa nAkara ne AsapAsa meM rahane vAle zrAvaka bhAiyoM ko jAkara yaha sArI bAta khii| duranta 2-4 zrAvaka bhAI sthAnaka meM daur3e Aye, aura tikkhutoM - tikkhuto karate hue tapasvIjI ko vandanA kI, aura muha ke Age paMcIyAsA kapar3A rakhakara udAsIna cahare aura gamagIna bhAva se pUchane lage ki mahArAja yaha kyA huA? tapasvIjI ne kahA- 'bhAIyoM ! munnAlAlajI ke pAsa vaha soyA hunA thA aura prAdhI rAta ko peTa meM khUba darda ho rahA hai aisA kahakara zauca jAne ke lie pichalI

Page #57
( 42 ) merI jovana prapaMca kathA sIr3hiyoM se utara kara pAsa vAlo galI meMse nikala kara cupacApa kahIM calA gayA ityAdi / " sunakara zrAvaka bhAI bar3e khinnaM hue| kahane lage ki , kyA yaha munnAlAla mahArAja ko apane bhAI ke caritra ke viSaya meM kucha jJAna nahIM thA? inhoMne kyA socakara usako dIkSa lene ke lie taiyAra kiyA aura 2-4 hajAra rupaye zrAvakoM ke nAhaka ke kharca karAye tapasvIjI uDe kaleje se bole karma kI vicitra gati ko kisako khabara hoto hai ?. parantu zrAvakoM ko isa bAta kA kucha bho pracAra na karanA cAhiye aura jAne kucha huyA ho nahIM / isa taraha mana mAra kara calanA cAhiye / parantu aisI bAta ekadama chipI kaise rhe| vaha calA gayA. isakA to kisI ko jyAdA aphasosa na huaA kyoMki aise 'kisse to aneka bAra hugrA karate haiM / parantu jo hamAra-pA~ca sau kA, kapar3e Adi kA kImatI mAla uThA gayA thA usakA. ina baniyoM ko. jyAdA aphasosa hugrA kyoMki ye sArA sAmAna eka prAgevAna seTha ke vahA~ kA thaa| ghaNTe bhara bAda jaba yaha bAta usa seTha ko mAlUma huI to ve bhI turanta sthAnaka meM pAe / ___ seTha samAja meM eka prAmevAna aura pratiSThita vyakti kahalAte the| samAja ke hara eka kAma meM loga unako Age karate aura unake pAsa se paise prAdi kI sahAyatA lete the / seTha indaura ke sarrAphA bAjAra ke eka nAmI rAjamAnya dhanika mAne jAte the, seTha hamezA bahuta ThATha-pATha se rahate the| sthAnaka meM Aye taba tapasvIjI ko vandanA kI aura muha ke Age khesa rakha kara gambhIra bhAva se pUchane lge| kaunape zabdoM dvArA unhoMne gurUjI ko sambodhita kiyA usakI to prAja mujhako ThIka' smRpti nahIM haiM parantu, seTha ke pahanAve aura hAvabhAva kA tAdRzya citra mere mana para yayAvata citrita hai / seTha ke sAtha do-tIna anya vaise AgevAna vyakti bhI the| seTha kI umra koI 6065 varSa jitanI tho| gauravarja, madhyama kadakA zarIra, lambo nAka aora cauDI akhe camakA karatI thoM / / unhoMne, :zarIra para. dhanavAna loga pahanA karate haiM vaise UcI jAta kI malamala kA mAlavA Dhaga kA aMgarakhA pahana rakhA thA / nIce cUr3IdAra sapheda dUdha ke jhAga jaise kapar3e kA banA pAIjAmA pahane hue the aura pairoM meM acchI jAta ke mauje the| aMgarakhe para gale meM eka kImatI pannoM kI mAlA pahana rakhI thii| hAtha meM kimatI hore aura mAneka kA aMguThiyA~ pahano huI thoM / kAnoM meM gola sone ke kuNDala jaise the, jinake bIca meM pannA aura mAneka jaiso kimatI ratna laTaka rahe the / seTha ne dhImI AvAja se tapasvIjI mahArAja ko jaise ThapakA dete ho vaise zabda' kahane lage"sAdhuoM ko celAnI kA bar3A moha hotA hai aura jo pAyA usako muNDavA kara sAdhu banAne kA prayatna karate rahate haiM / yogya ayogya kI parIkSA sAdhu kabhI nahIM karate aura dIkSA ke bahAne

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sAtavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ( 43 ) hajAroM rUpaye baniyoM ke barbAda karavAte rahate haiM / mujhe ina bhAIyoM ne Akara dokSA mahotsava ko bAta kahI, taba maiMne dhaMsakara nA kahI thii| nAhaka kA merA hajAra-pA~casau kA mAla sAmAna gaMvAyA ityAdi / " thor3I dera cupa rahane ke bAda seTha bole "pA~caveM pAre kA ye kuprabhAva hai / apana saba bhArI karmI jIva isa bAre meM janme haiM Aja koI kevala jJAnI vidyamAna nahIM hai, nahIM to unake pAsa jAkara pUchate ki bhagavAna vaha bhArI karmI jIva kahA~ jAkara chupA hai| patA lagane para turanta sarakArI sipAhiyo dvArA rasma se baMdhavA kara maMgavAtA vagairaha / khaira bhAvIbhAva parantu prApa sAdhu mahArAjoM ko cAhe jise muNDakara celA bar3hAne kA moha na rakhanA cAhiye / " aisA kahakara seTha cale gae / isa ghaTanA ke bAda usI dina dApahara ko hama sAdhuoM ne usa sthAnaka se vidAI lI aura dakSiga ke lie rAstA nApanA zurU kiyA / . indaura se prasthAna indaura se do cAra mIla dUrI para sthita gAMva meM jAkara rAta rahe / zAma ko pratikramaNa kiyA aura jese pichalI rAta ko kucha huA hI nahIM vase monadhAraNa karake hama pAMcoM sAdhu so gae / dUsare dina subaha dakSiNa kI ora jAne vAlI mahU-pAseragar3ha ko sar3aka para krama se Age bar3he / mere mana meM deza darzana kA utsAha bahuta rahA karatA hai| prAkRtika sauMdarya, darzaka parvatoM, jaMgaloM, nadiyoM vagairaha ko dekhakara merA mana hamezA praphUllita hotA rahatA hai / mAlave meM dhAra, indaura, ratalAma, ujjaina vagairahU sthAnoM meM paribhramaNa karate hue aise koI khAsa prAkRtika dRzya dekhane meM nahIM pAye the / mAlave kI bhUmi lagabhaga samatala hokara khAsa upajAU kahalAtI hai / usameM bIca2 meM pahAr3oM kI yA bar3I2 nadiyoM kI sundara dRzyAvaliyAM dRSTigocara nahIM hotI / hama indaura ke bAda mahU sthAna chor3akara Age bar3hane lage taba narbadA kI ghATI kA pradeza pAne lgaa| mahU se koI 20-25 mAIla dUra bar3avAha nAmaka kasbe meM jaisA sthAna narbadA ke taTa para basA huA hai| usake sAmane vAle nado ke tIra para oMkArezvara kA prasiddha tIrthadhAma AyA huA hai / hamArA vaise tIrtha sthAnoM ko dekhane ke lie jAnA nahIM hotA thaa| magara mArga meM koI durzanIya sthAna Ate to avazya dekhane kA prayatna karate /

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( 44 ) mero jovana prapaMca kathA ___ maha se bar3avAha jAte samaya rAste meM kAlApAnI nAmaka eka choTA sA relvesTezana hai / mahU se thor3I dUrI para choTI pahAr3iyAM Ane lagI aura vaha jatAra vAlA pradeza thA isalie usameM se jAnI vAlI sar3aka sthAna2 para Ter3he mor3a lekara nIce utaratI thii| usake pAsa pAsa relve lAIna bhI usI taraha utara rahI thI / bIca meM eka do choTI moTI pahAr3iyAM kATakara usameM se relve lAIna nikAlI huI dekhI / dekhakara mere pAzcarya kA pAra na rahA / thor3A bahuta jAnane meM pAyA thA ki aMgrejoM kI yaha eka adbhuta karAmAta hai / jinhoMne aise bar3e pahAr3a ko nAce se kATa2 kara usameM se relve lAIna nikAlI thI / hama usa sar3aka para tIna cAra ghaNTe taka calate rahe, usa bIca meM eka peMsejara gAr3I bhI usa relve lAIna para jAtA dekho aura * vaha phaka-phaka karatI suraMga meM ghusa gaI aura thor3I dera bAda dUsarI ora bAhara nikala gaI / mere abodha aura bAla mana meM ise dekhakara kaI tarka-vitarka hAte rahe / hameM jisa sthAna para pahu~canA thA vaha lagabhaga 10-12 mIla jitanA dUra thA / rAste meM rahane lAyaka koI khAsa sthAna nahIM thA / sAdhu jIvana ko caryA kI kucha carcA hamAre isa prakAra ke sAdhu jIvana kI caryA ke viSaya meM kucha thor3I sI carcA karane cAhatA hU~ kyoMki hama jisa taraha kI kucha kaThina kahI jAne vAlI aisI cayAM kA pAlana karate the vaha caryA mere jIvana meM phira kabhI dekhane meM yA anubhava meM nahIM AyI / / hama sAdhujana apane upayogI Avazyaka vastra, pAtra aura potho panne saba apane pAsa hI rakhate aura apane zarIra dvArA jitane uThAye jA sake utane hI upakaraNa rakhate the / kisI bhI gRhastha ke dvArA apane upayoga kI eka bhI vastu uThavAte nahIM the, athavA kisI ke dvArA maMgavAte bhI nahIM the / sUryodaya hone ke bAda hI vihAra karate the aura sUryAsta ho jAne ke bAda eka Daga bhI calate nahIM the dopahara ke vakta vihAra karate to gAMva meM se liyA huaA Avazyaka nirvadhya pAnI pAtra meM rakha lete the bhara grISma meM bhI isI caryA kA pAlana karate the / niyama thA ki jisa sthAna se mAhAra yA pAnI grahaNa kiyA ho usa sthAna se jyAdA se jyAdA koI 4 mola (do kosa) dUra le jAne kI AjJA thI / kitanIka daphaha aisA anubhava karanA par3A ki bhara grISma ke dopahara ko 3-4 baje taka vihAra karate aura 2 kosa dUra sImA pUrI ho jAto to vahAM kisI vRkSa

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mAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (45) nIce baiThakara antima pAnI kAma meM lete yAnI pI lete| aisA karane para yadi garmI jyAdA anulAva hotI to prAdha-pauna ghaNTA usa vRkSa ke nIce vizrAnti lekara baiThe rahate aura pAnI kA pratima Ta pI kara pAtra meM bacA huA pAnI zuddha bhUmi para 'paraTha' dete / paraThane kI kriyA bhI khAsa raha kI hotI hai bhUmi kI bara bara dekha-bhAla kara, koI vanaspato ugo huI na ho, kIr3e-makohe mAdi sukSma jIvoM kA halana-calana na ho, aisI zuddha nirjIva bhUmi meM pAnI ko Dhola denA par3atA hai| aisI ho kriyA laMghu-zaMkA karane ke lie bho karanI hoto hai / varSoM taka aisI caryA kA pAlana hamane kama jyAdA taura para kiyA thaa| rAste meM calate samaya kisI ke sAtha bAta na karanI cAhie aisI bhI sIkha do gayI thI / calate-calate rAtri kA nivAsa karane ke yogya sthAna najadIka na ho to phira sUryAsta dekhakara kahIM bhI vRkSa ke nAce yA kahIM koI kheta kI bhoMpar3I kA pAzraya lekara rAtri vyatIta karanI hotI thI / aise 2-4 anubhava bhI usa jIvana meM hue / isa taraha jaba hama usa sar3aka ke rAste se jA rahe the taba zAma hogaI / usa vakta relve kI lAIna aura calane ko sar3aka ke bIca meM eka jagaha jagala meM eka vRkSa dekhane meM AyA / patA bhagAne para mAlUma huA ki gAMva to 2-3 kosa kI dUrI para hai isalie calanA niSiddha thA jaMgala meM usa vRkSa ke nIce hI pazuoM ke baiThane kI jagaha thI usako rajoharaNa ke dvArA sApha karake usake Upara vastra DAlakara rAtri vyatIta kii| dina sahaja-sAja garmI jaise the, isalie rAtri jyAdA kaSTadAyaka nahIM lgii| hamane jisa per3a ke nIce rAtri vyatIta karane kA nizcaya kiyA, vahIM se 100-200 kadama dUra relve mena ko pakkI kuTiyA thI / ji meM eka relvemena rahA karatA thA vaha pAtI jAtI gAr3iyoM ko lAla yA harI jhaNDI yA battI batAne kA kAma kiyA karatA / dUra se usane hamako dekhA aura hamAre pAsa Akara kahane lagA ki "sAdhu mahArAja ! Apane yahA~ isa sunasAna jaMgala meM kisalie par3e rahanA pasanda kiyA ? yahAM tA kabhI kabho rAtri ko cIte jase jAnavara bhI A jAte haiM aura pAsa pAsa ke bher3a yA bakariyA~ Adi ko uThA le jAte haiN|" hamane hamArI sthiti usako samajhAI usane kahA mahArAja rAta ko jagate rahanA aura koI pazu jaisA dUra se AtA dikhAI par3e to khukhArA vaigaraha karanA / maiM bhI rAta ko merI kuTiyA meM jagatA rahatA hU~ / usa relve mena kI bAta sunakara hamAre mana meM jarUra bhaya kA saMcAra humA / sArI rAta sone kI bAta hI na tho tapasvIjA aura hama sAdhu mana meM navakAra mantra kA jApa karate rahe aura bichaune meM sikUr3a kara muha para caddara proDakara par3e rahe / magara rAtri meM relve lAIna para 3-4 daphe gAr3iyAM pAyI gayI / unako dekhane se mujhe to rAta khUba Ananda-dAyaka lagI / jIvana meM pahalI daphe hI aisA kautuhala janaka dRzya dekhane meM AyA / usa jamAne meM na moTara thI na Traka vagairaha, sAIkila para bhI koI dikhAI na detA thA mAtra bailagAr3iyAM calatI thii|

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( 46 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA yaha pravAsa hamArA lagabhaga 15-20 dina jitanA lambA thA aura bIca-bIca meM 3-4 bAra hamako aise jaMgala meM rAtri vyatIta karanI par3I thii| eka jagaha, jahA~ 2-4 prAma ke vRkSa the vahA~ hamako rAtri vyatIta karane kA prasaMga AyA / vahA~ Asa-pAsa ke vRkSoM ke nIce zAma hote hI 5-10 hiraNoM kA jhuNDa pAkara baiTha jAtA thaa| dUra jaMgala meM kahIM cIte vagairaha hiMsaka pazuoM kI AvAja sunAI par3atI to vaha hiraNoM kA jhuNDa hamAre pAsa-pAsa Akara baiTha jAtA hamako bhaya lagatA rahatA thA ki zAyada ina hiraNoM kI vajaha se vaha hiMsaka pazu isa tarapha daur3e na pAe~ / isa taraha hama calate hue narmadA nadI ke tora para base hue bar3avAha nAmaka acche se kasbe meM pahu~ce / bar3avAha ke sAmane kinAre para oMkArezvara kA prasiddha tIrthasthAna hai / jahA~ rAjasthAna, gujarAta, madhyapradeza, mahArASTra Adi dezoM ke hajAroM loga prativarSa yAtrA karane Ate haiM / bar3avAha, indaura ke holkara rAjAoM kA grISma nivAsa kI dRSTi se eka acchA sA hila sTezana samajhA jAtA hai / hama jina dinoM bar3avAha pahu~ce unhIM dinoM meM holkara mahArAjA ne eka nayo moTara kAra vilAyata se maMgavAI thI / isa moTara meM baThakara holkara mahArAja zAma ke samaya apane mahala ma nikala kara bar3avAha ke bAjAra meM hote hue kahIM zikAra Adi ke lie jAyA karate the / hama bAjAra ke eka jaina zrAvaka kI dukAnanumA jagaha meM Thahare hue the, taba hamAre makAna ke sAmane hokara nikalane vAlI usa moTara gAr3I ko hama bar3e cAva se dekhA karate the| gAMva ke anya loga bhI use dekhane ke lie bAjAra meM ikaThTha ho jAte the| binA ghor3oM se calane vAlI isa naI taraha kI baggho jaiso gAr3I meM baiThakara jAte hue mahArAjA ko loga jhuka jhuka kara mujarA karate rahate the / hamArI hI taraha logoM ne bhI isa taraha binA ghor3oM se calane vAlI isa ajIba gAr3I ko jindagI meM pahalI hI bAra dekhI thii| mere mana meM kaI dinoM taka isakA kautuhala b| raha ki yaha gAr3I kisa taraha sar3aka para daur3I jAtA hai / peTrola aura gAr3I meM lage hue. iji / prAdi kI kisI ko koI kalpanA nahIM thIM / bar3avAha se hama mahezvara gaye, jahA~ narbadA nadI ke kinAre para suprasiddha holkara mahArAnA mahalyAbAI ne bar3e sundara ghATa banavAye haiN| vahA~ para narbadA nado kA bahuta sundara dRzya dikhAyI detA hai / vahAM se vApasa Akara narbadA nadI ko pAra karane ke lie bar3avAha se kucha dUrI para, bane hue relve ke pula para hokara, hama sAmane vAle kinAre para pahu~ce anya loga to nAvoM meM baiTha

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navAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ( 47 ra nadI ko pAra karate rahate haiM, parantu jaina sAdhu ko nAva meM baiThatA, niSiddha hai / isalie nado di ko pAra karane ke lie usI rAste hokara ve Ate jAte haiM. jahA~ pula Adi kA sAdhana / hama usa rAste karate hue do tIna dina bAda eka choTe gAMva meM pahu~ce, jahA~ jaina zrAvaka I ghara nahIM thA / kevala 25-30 kisAnoM Adi ke ghara the / eka kisAna ne hameM rAta ko harane ke lie pazuoM ke bA~dhane ke sthAna ke pAsa jo cautarA sA banA huA thA aura Upara parela kA TUTAphUTA chappara thA, vahA~ jagaha batalAyI / hama vahA~ Thahara gaye parantu usameM cAroM rapha khulI havA prAtI rahatI thI, usa havA ke laga jAne se mujhe joroM kI sardI hogayIM subaha hote 2 to khUba jora se bukhAra car3ha zrAyA / aisI sthiti meM hameM usa dina vihAra ranA sthagita rakhanA par3A / dopahara hone para tapasIjI aura eka anya sAdhu kisAnoM ke yahA~ kucha bhikSA mA~gane ke lie gaye / ve kisAna kevala javArI ko roTI aura usake sAtha meM baiMgana, pyAja Adi kI sajA banAlete the, sAtha meM chAcha kA upayoga karate rahate the / tapasIjI 4-5 kisAnoM ke vahA~ jAkara AdhI2 javArI ko roTI bhikSA ke rUpa meM mA~ga lAye kucha thor3I sI bAcha bhI grAne pAna meM le aaye| sAdhu ne usa prahAra se apanI kucha bhUkha miTAyo parantu maiM to bukhAra meM sikur3a kara sArA dina par3A rahA / jisa kisAna ke makAna ke chappara meM hama Tike the, vaha kisAna zAma ko jaba kheta se ghara para AyA to usa mAlUma huA ki hama loga usake makAna meM usI taraha Tike hue haiM / jaba hamane pichalI rAtri ke lie usase makAna mAMgA to kahA ki bhAI subaha dina ugate hI hama yahAM se cale jaayeNge| kisAna subaha jaldI ho uThakara ne poM ko lekara kheta para khulA gayA / ghara meM usakI strI tho goTiyAM banAkara kheta para calI gayoM ghara meM zAyada do-tIna bacce the / apane pazuoM ko lekara ghara para AyA to hameM vahIM dekhakara use kucha Azcarya sA huA / vaha bhI 6-10 baje 13 kisAna jaba zAma ko ) mAlave ke kisAna kucha bhadra svabhAva ke hote haiM aura ve sAdhu santa, gratithi Adi ka tarapha bhakti bhI rahate haiM / usa kisAna ko hamAre nAre dina vahIM rahane kI bAta kA patA lagA to vaha namra bhAva se kahane lagA ki bAbAjI mahArAja Apane kucha khAba pIyA yA nahIM ? use kumArI bAta kucha batA do gayI aura maiM sArA dina bukhAra meM par3A huA sisaka raha thA yaha dekhakara usake dila meM bahuta dayA ho bhaaii| vaha kahane lagA ki mahArAna Apake ina choTe sAu pilAne ke lie dUdha garama karake lA detA hU~ Apa inako kucha liAda, jise kucha gara jhA jAyeI ityAdi / ve kisAna cAya kA nAma bhI nahIM jAnate the aura loMga grAdi masAle vAlo hotroM kA bhI unako kucha khayAla nahIM thA / tapasvojI ne kahA ki bhAI hama sAu loga rAta ko na pAnI pIte haiM, na dUdha ho lete haiM aura na kisI prakAra kA roTI yAdi kA bhojana ho

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( 48 ) __ mero jIvana prapaMca kara karate haiM / kisAna sunakara gambhIra bhAva se apane makAna meM calA gayA / merA bukhAra dUsare dinu bhI nahIM uttarA isalie dUsare dina bhI hameM vahIM usa chappara meM rahanA par3A / kisAna ne dUsare dina jarUra thor3A sA garama dUdha lene ko hameM Agraha kiyA aura vaha liyA gayA / anya sAdhuoM ke lie usI taraha kisAnoM ke jAkara javArI kI lukhI roTo aura chAcha kA pAnI bhikSA ke rUpa meM le pAe / sardI ke dina the, isalie koI kisAna garama pAnI bhI hAtha Adi dhone ke lie karate the, so hamako lene yogya pAnI kisI ke yahAM milA to use bhI eka pAtra meM le pAe / usa kisAna ke vahA~ se bhI dUsare dina eka do javArI ko roTiyA~ bahera lii| usake yahA~ aphoma ke pattA kI bhAjI banAI gaI thI, vaha bhI thor3a sI milagaI / tIsare dina merA bukhAra kucha halkA huA, taI usa kisAna ke vahAM se jo thor3A bahuta dUdha milA vaha poyA / isa taraha 4-5 dina hameM vahA~ nikA lane par3e / bukhAra ke haTa jAne para aura kucha thor3I sI calane jaisI zakti pAne para hamane vahAM se prAra ke lie prayANa kiyA / koI do tIna dina dhIre-dhIre calane ke bAda hama eka gAMva meM pahu~ce, jo bhAsIragar3ha kI chAvanA se kucha 8-10 mIla dUrI para thaa| hama jisa rAste se hokara jA rahe the vaha sar3aka se kucha 5-7 mola kI dUrI para thA ye gAMva saba choTe choTe kisAnoM kI bastI vAle the / unameM jaina yA anya baniye tathA brAhmaNa Adi ko bastI nahIM thI parantu kisAnoM ke yahAM se hameM javArI kI roTI, kucha chAcha aura kahIM thor3A sA garama pAnI mila jAyA karatA / yaha rAstA kucha phaadd'| sA thA aura vaha nimAr3a kA pradeza kahalAtA thaa| hameM dakSiNa kI aura jAnA thA, jisakA mukhya rAstA prAsIragar3ha hokara barahAnapura jAtA thaa| satapur3A ke jaMgala kA ugra vihAra ____ hama jaba eka vaise par3Ava vAle gAMva pahuMce to vahAM hameM mAlUma huA ki mAlave meM kahIM-kahI phlega kA prakopa hone se, mAlave se udhara jAne vAloM ko Aseragar3ha ke pAsa vAlI chAvanI meM kama kama 10 dina ke lie plega pratibaMdhaka kempa meM rahanA par3atA hai aura Toke lagavAne par3ate haiM / hamA lie yaha eka bar3I samasyA khar3I ho gaI / taba hamane gAMva vAloM se pUchA ki bhAI ! tuma loga karma amuka gAMva jAte hoge to kyA karate hoge ? taba hameM kahA gayA ki hama loga kabhI sar3aka ke bar3e rAsa

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ( 46 ) se nahIM jAte / hama loga to gAMvoM ke jaMgala vAle rAste se hokara cale jAte haiM / taba hamane kahA ki hameM bhusAvala pahu~canA hai, to vahA~ jAne kA vaisA koI jaMgala kA sIdhA rAstA hai ? ityAdi taba hameM kahA gayA ki amuka rAste se pahAr3oM ke bIca hokara jAne se do-tIna dina meM bhusAvala se idhara amuka mAMva pahu~ca jAte haiN| hamane una kisAnoM se rAste Adi kI ThIka jAnakArI prA.ta ko aura usI rAste se Age jAne kA vicAra kiyA / hamane gAMva vAloM se pUchA ki usa rAste kA jAnakAra yahAM se koI jAtA ho to hameM usase milA do| taba gAMva ke eka mukhiyA se kisAna ne kahA ki yahAM para gAMva ke bAhara eka sarakArI caukI hai, vahA~ se roja eka cokIdAra kucha kAgajAta vagairaha lekara jAtA hai / yahAM se 12-13 mIla ke phAsale para pahAr3I jaMgaloM ke ThIka bIca meM sarakArI jaMgalAta mahakameM ko bar3o caukI hai, vahAM para yaha caukIdAra kAgaja pahu~cAtA hai / Apa loga usake sAtha usa bar3I cauko para cale jAno aura vahAM se phira vaisA hI koI caukIdAra Apako mila jAyegA, jo pahAr3oM ke usa pAra vAle gAMva meM pahu~cA degA, ityAdi / hama usa dina usI gAMva meM rahe aura kisAnoM ke vahA~ se juvArI kI kucha roTiyA~ aura chAcha kA pAno lAkara apanI bhUkha mittaayii| rAta ko vaha mukhiyA sA kisAna usa caukIdAra ko bulA lAyA hamane usako hamAre jAne kI bAta smjhaayii| vaha kucha bhalA sA AdamI thaa| so usane kahAki bAbAjI mahArAja maiM kala subaha pATha-nau baje apanI caukI se kucha sarakArI kAgaja lekara usa bar3I caukI ko jAUgA~, so Apa loga bhI mere sAtha cale clnaa| para rAstA bar3A Ter3hAmer3ho aura kaI pahAr3oM para car3hane utarane ke bAda vahAM pahu~catA hai / isameM 6 se 7 ghaNTe lagate haiM / rAste meM koI gA~va yA par3Ava jaisI Thaharane kI jagaha nahIM hai / maiM to mahine meM 5-10 daphe vahAM jAtA rahatA hU~, isalie mujhe to vaha rAstA vesA vikaTa nahIM lAtA, para aoroM ke lie vaha vikaTa sA jarUra hai / agara ApakI himmata ho to mere sAtha kala cale calanA hama sAdhuoM ko kucha thor3A sA vaise rAstoM kA anubhava hai aura aba dakSiNa kI ora jAnA hI hai tathA prAdhe rAste taka A pahu~ce haiM to do-tIna dina kA yaha vikaTa pravAsa pUrA kara lenA cAhiye / isa vicAra se hama dUsare dina subaha hote hI usa gAMva vAle tIna cAra kisAnoM ke ghara se kucha javArI kI roTiyAM mA~ga lAye sAtha meM kucha tAjo chAcha aura aphIna kI bhAjo bhI milagaI / mukhiyA kisAna ke vahA~ nahAne ke lie| garama pAno kiyA huA thA usameM se bhI kucha thor3A sA garama pAnI pAtra meM le aaye| hamane jaldI-jaldI pAhAra kiyA aura kapar3e Adi zarIra para lapeTa kara usa caukIdAra kI caukI para pahu~ce / / caukodAra Adima jAtI kA thA, para jarA samajhadAra aura kucha bar3e

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( 50 ) gAMvoM meM rahane ke kAraNa bola-cAla meM ThIka mAlUma diyA / usakI caukI meM kucha gAya, bhaiMsa aura bher3a-bakarI Adi jAnavara the aura ghara meM do-tIna striyA~ bhI thii| unakA pahanAva zrAdi bhI ThIka rAjasthAna ke bhIloM kI taraha kA thA / ve gavA~rU nimAr3I bolI bolate the, jo kucha tA hamArI samajha meM AtI thI aura kucha nahIM prAtI thii| jaba hama usa caukI para pahu~ce taba vaha caukI - dAra ghara meM roTI khA rahA thaa| hamako caukI ke najadIka prAte dekhakara usa kI do-eka aurateM cillAkara ghara meM ghuma gaI aura kucha jora jora se bolane lago / una auratoM ne hamAre jaise mu~ha bA~dhe hue aura vicitra veSa dhAraNa kiye hue manuSyoM ko kabhI nahIM dekhA thaa| isane zAyada ve striyAM Dara sI gii| caukIdAra turata ghara se bAhara AyA aura hameM dekhakara bolA ki bAbAjI maiM roTI khA rahA hU~ so zrApa loga usa darakhata ke nIce kucha dera ThahareM itanA kahakara vaha ghara ke andara gayA aura turanta caukIdAra kA pahanAvA pahana kara aura hAtha meM eka acchI lAhe kI kar3IdAra lakar3I aura jisa pana lohe kA dhAra-dAra phalaka lagA huA thA, vaha lekara bAhara AyA / sAtha meM DAkiye loga jaisA DAka kA thailA rakhate haiM, vaisA thelA usane apanI bagala meM lagA liyaa| usane khAne ke lie kucha rATiyAM bhI usa thaile meM DAla lI aura vaha ghara kI auratoM kucha kahakara ravAnA huA, aura hamako bhI kahA ki calo bAbAjI aba hama calate haiN| hama usake pochera ho lie / usake paroM meM to acchI majabUta jUtiyA~ thIM, badana para pulina ke jenA paha nAvA thA aura sira para kisAnoM kI so ThIka pagar3I bA~va rakhI thI / lakar3I ko apane kaMdhe para rakha lI thI aura usameM vaha thailA bhI laTakA liyA thA, jo usakI pITha para laTakane lagA / calate samaya usane bIr3I bhI sulagAkara apane mu~ha rakhalI thii| caukI se bosekada ke phAsale para eka choTA sA cauMtarA banA huA thA, jisa para bherUjo ke pratIka svarUpa 2 - 3 prastara khaNDa rakhe hue the, jina para tela - sindUra bAda lagA huA thA / caukIdAra una gRhadevoM ko namaskAra karake Age bar3hane lagA / mero jovana prapaMca kathA hama loga to naMge paira aura nage sira the hamAre kaMdhoM para Age pIche pauthiyoM ke veSTana laTaka rahe the| hAtha meM pAtroM vAlo jholiya thI / eka hAtha meM lambI DaMDI vAlA jAharaNa lekara cala rahe the| kabhI 2 rajoharaNa ko kaMdhe para bhI DAla lete the / isa prakAra hama 5 (pA~coM) sAdhu aura vaha caukIdAra milAkara cha manuSyoM kA kAphilA Age bar3hane lagA / subaha kA samaya thA dhUpa acchI nikalI huI thI, isalie hama saba jaldI-jaldI paira uThAkara Age bar3hane lge| koI 1 mIla taka to sodhA samatala rAstA thA / rAstA kevala ikke-dukke manuSyoM aura pazuyoM ke calane jaisA thaa| bAda meM eka pahAr3I kI car3hAna AyI usa para hama zrAste2 car3hane lge| kaMTIle vRkSoM kI jhAr3iyA~ bhI zurU huI / unake bIca meM hokara hamArI choTo sI pagaDaMDI jA rahI thii| aisI

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kabAso saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava jhAr3I aura bar3o U~cI ghAsa hameM lAMghanA thaa| sAdhu ke prAcAra ke mutAbika aise rAste para calanA aura harI ghAsa tathA jhAr3iyA~ ko sparza karanA niSiddha haiN| para hamAre lie koI cArA nahIM thaa| isalie hama usakA kucha bhI vicAra nahIM karate the aura gaste ko kisI taraha taya karanA hI hamArA mukhya lakSya rahA / koI ghaNTA bhara meM hama usa pahAr3I kI. Upara kI coTo para pahuMce vahAM se hamane Age dekhA to sAmane kI ora eka usase bhI U~cI pahAr3I dikhAI dii| caukIdAra ne kahA ki bAbA jo hameM isa pahAr3I se nIce utarakara sAmane dikhAI dene vAlI bar3I pahAr3I para car3hanA hai| isa prakAra tIna pahAr3iyA~ jaba hama pAra kareMge taba vaha hamArI bar3I cauko AyegI / isalie Apa jarA phurtI se kadama uThAte rahanA ityAdi / hamane kahA caukIdAra jI Apa hamArI ciMtA na kareM, hama Apake poche pIche usI taraha calate raheMge, jaisA Apa cala / cAhate haiM / usa pahAr3o se hama koI Adhe ghaNTe meM nAce utara gae / vahA~ para eka choTA sA pAnI kA jharanA baha raha thA / usameM se caukIdAra ne kucha pAnI poyA / usane kahA bAbAjI zrApa bhI kucha pAnI pIleM, yaha pAnI bahuta mIThA hai, aisA pAnI Age nahIM milane vAlA << ityAda / hamane caukIdAra ko kahA ki bhAI hama sAdhu loga aisA pAnI nahIM pIte haiM / para hameM bhI kucha nyAsa lagI thI / jo pAnI hama pAtra meM bharakara sAtha lAye the usako bhI kSetra maryAdA pUrI ho gaI hogI aisA socakara hamane bhI vaha thoDA thor3A pAnI po liyA / samaya koI 11-12 baje jitanA huA hogA, kyAki ghar3o kisI ke pAsa nahIM thii| hama sAdhu loga to ghar3I rakha hI nahIM sakate the, parantu usa caukIdAra ke pAsa bhI Aja ke yuga kI taraha koI ghar3I nahIM thI / zAyada usa cokIdAra ne tA apane jIvana meM aisI ghar3I dekho ho nahIM hogI / usa jharane ko pAra karake hama agalI pahAr3I para car3hane lge| isakA rAstA pahalI pahAr3o kI apekSA adhika viSama aura patharIlA thaa| rAstA ghane vRkSoM se AcchAdita thA parantu pazuoM ke jAne mAne ke kAraNa kucha caur3A sA thA hama jaldI-jaldI paira uThAte hue pahADI para car3hate gae / koI 23 ghaNTe vAda usa pahAr3o kI coTI para pahu~ce, vahA~ se prAge dekhate haiM tA isase kucha choTI rantu vaisI hA pahAr3o sAmane dikhAI dI . caukIdAra ne kahA usa pahAr3I ko pAra karane ke bAda usako agalI pahAr3I para vaha baDI caukI hai, jahA~ hareM. pahu~catA hai| suna kara hameM kucha vicAra to hA ki abhI to itanI ghATI aura pAra karanI hai, zApada kahIM rAta na par3a * jAya / isa bhaya se hama loga jaldo-jAdA calane lage / caukIdAra to pUrA abhyasta aura rAste kA jAnakAra thA isalie usake lie koI khAsa vAta nahIM th'| vaha to apano hameMzA kI raphtAra ke mutAbika cala rahA thA aura bAca bAca meM bor3iyA~ pha+tA jAtA thA / hama loga cupa-cApa

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( 52 ) mAno mauna dhAraNa kiye hue cale jA rahe the| pairoM meM kucha thakAvaTa sI bhI mAlUma ho rahI thI, parantu kisI taraha usa caukI para pahu~canA hai yahI mukhya lakSya thA / isalie na thakAvaTa aura na bhUkha pyAsa kA hI koI vicAra mana meM prAtA thaa| usa U~cI sI pahAr3I se hama loga jaldA jaldo nIce utare aura phira eka pAnI kA acchA nAlA sA AyA, usameM pAno kala-kala karatA baha rahA thA, parantu bIca-bIca meM bar3e2 patthara par3e hue the, isalie una pattharoM para paira rakhate hue hamane usa nA ko pAra kiyaa| phira tIsaro pahAr3I kI car3hAna zurU huii| vaha bhI dUsarI pahAr3I kI taraha viSama aura patharIlI thI jhAr3I bhI khUba saghana thI para isa jhAr3I ke kAraNa hameM sUrya kA tApa nahIM satAtA thA / koI 4 baje ke karIba hama tIsarI pahAr3I kI coTI para pahu~ce vahAM para caukIdAra baiThA aura hameM bhI kucha vizrAnti lene ko kahA aura batAyA ki yaha sAmane jo cauthI choTI sI pahAr3I dikhAI detI hai usakI coTI para vaha bar3I caukI hai / hamako vahA~ pahu~cate pahu~cate karIva DeDa ghaNTA aura lagegA / mero jovana prapaMca kathA 5-10 miniTa kI vizranti ke bAda hama loga Age calane lge| isa coTI para se nIce utare taba eka choTI sI nado prAyI / isameM kAphI pAnI baha rahA thA, parantu bIca-bIca meM patthara kI kucha caTTAneM aura bar3e bar3e patthara Adi the jisase hameM nadI pAra karane meM koI vizeSa dikkata uThAnI nahIM par3I / caukIdAra ne to nadI meM mu~ha vaigaraha dhoyA aura acchI taraha pAnI ke kulle Adi kara peTa bhara kara pAnI poyA / hama to tRpAparIsaha kA smaraNa karate hue kucha vizrAnti hI kA Ananda lete rahe / phira taiyAra hokara Age bar3hane lage atra jo pahAr3I car3hanI thI, vaha utanI U~cI nahIM thI aura usa para jhAr3iyA~, ghAsa, Adi bhI itanI saghana nahIM thI / para thakAvaTa kA jora bar3hatA jA rahA thA isalie yaha car3hAI pichalI saba car3hAIyoM kI apekSA adhika kaThina pratIta ho rahI thii| dhIre-dhIre hama cauthI pahAr3I kI coTI para pahu~ce taba vaha bar3I caukI hameM dikhAI dI / caukIdAra ne kahA ki ye jo kucha jhoMpar3e aura do tIna khaparela vAle makAna dikhAI dete haiM vahI bar3I caukI hai| koI Adhe ghaNTe meM hama vahAM pahu~ca jAyeMge / AkAza kI tarapha hamane dekhA to sUrya bhI jaldI jaldI nIce utaratA jA rahA thA / hamane bhI usI kI taraha jaldI jaldI vaha pahAr3I utaranI zurU kI / sUryAsta hote2 hama usa caukI ke najadIka jA pahu~ce / vahAM kA mukhya caukIdAra apane -pAsa ke kue para rahaTa calA rahA thA aura kheta ko pAnI pilA rahA thaa| pAsa meM do-tIna prAdivAsI majadUra baiThe-baiThe tambAkU pI rahe the / hamako dUra se Ate dekhakara vaha caukIdAra ghabarA sA gayA aura pAsa meM baiThe hue logoM ko kahA ki are ! dekho, daur3o ye DAkkU se kauna Arahe haiM, utane meM usane hamAre Age-Age calane vAle usa caukIdAra ko jaba dekhA taba vaha kucha svastha sA huA aura socane lagA ki kyA yaha caukIdAra jaMgala meM se kinhIM cauroM ko pakar3akara lA rahA hai ? aura inake mu~ha Adi bAMdha diye haiM ? itane meM hamArA sAtha vAlA caukIdAra usake pAsa pahu~ca gayA aura usane mujarA yAdi kara thele meMse kAgaja nikAlakara

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pAnakavAsA sapradAya kA jIvanAnubhava sake hAtha meM de diyA, para Azcarya vaza usane, usa caukodAra ko pUchA ki ye kauna loga haiM ? aura kA se tere sAtha pA rahe haiM ? yaha inakA kaisA svAMga hai : muMha bA~dha rakhA hai, hAtha meM kucha lambI DaMDo sI le rakhI hai ityAdi / vaha cauqadAra dhIre se kahane lagA bAbU ye baniye ke gurU haiM aura sAdhu kahalAte haiN| ye loga mero caukI vAle gAMva meM kala Aye aura inakA vicAra Age bhusAvala kI tarapha jAne kA hai so sodhA rAstA jAnakara ye isa rAste se pAye haiM koI lubbe-laM ko nahIM hai / Apa inase bAteM karake saba hakIkata samajha sakaMge ityAdi / sunakara vaha hamArI tarapha prAyA aura hamase kahane lagA kyA Apa sAdhu bAbA haiM, aura yahAM kisalie Aye haiM, aura kahA~ jA rahe haiM ? yaha to bar3A ghora jaMgala haiM aura idhara khAsakara ka I zrAtA jAtA nahIM hai / hamArI yaha jagalAta ke mahakameM ko caukI hai / isa sAre jagala kI nigarAnI rakhanA hamArA kAma hai| koI cora-DAkU Adi isa jagala meM vahI luka-chIpa na jAyeM isake lie hameM yahAM paharA denA par3atA hai| jo koI hamAre isa jaMgala meM calA pAtA hai to hama use pakar3akara hamArA jo bar3A caukIdArI kA thAnA hai, vahA hameM bheja denA par3atA hai| usane phira usa sAtha vAle caukIdAra se pUchA ki inhone khAnA-pInA kahAM kiyA aura ye sArA dina aise vikaTa rAste meM kaige pAe inake pairoM meM na jUte haiM na sira para kapar3A hai ityAdi ? taba usa caukIdAra ne hamAre viSaya meM apane gAMva ke mukhiyA se jo kucha sunA thA vaha kaha sunaayaa| sunakara usa bar3e caukIdAra kA mana, kucha zAMta, huA aura hamase kahane lagA ki bAbAjI aba rAta ho rahI hai isalie prA loga yaha hamArI eka jhoMpar3I hai usameM Thahara jAIye / yahAM para rAta ke samaya cotA Adi jAnavara Ate rahate haiM, isalie sArI rAta hamAre isa maidAna meM lakar3iyAM jalatI rahatI hai aura hamAre dA-tIna naukara bhI paharA lagAte haiM / hama usa jhopar3I meM jA kara zAMti se baiThe aura kapar3e Adi kholakara tathA kucha vizrAnti lekara jaise-taise atikramaNa kiyA / hama sabhI khUba thake hue the isalie apane kapar3e bichAkara sone kI taiyArI karane lge| itane meM usa caukI kA jo mukhya thAnedAra sA thA vaha ghor3e para savArI karatA huA vahA~ pahu~cA / usake Thaharane ke lie alaga eka ThoMka sA ghara thA, jisameM vaha rahA karatA thaa| usa dina vaha kahIM jagala meM gayA huA thaa| usake pAne para usa choTe caukIdAra ne hamArI prAne tathA jhoMpar3o meM Thaharane kI bAta kahI / vaha thAnedAra jAti kA brAhmaNa thA aura kucha par3hA likhA thA / nimAr3a ke kisI kasbe meM rahane vAlA thA para varSoM se usa caukI kA vaha khAsa kAma sambhAlatA thaa| boca-bIca meM vaisI aneka cokiyA~ usa pahAr3I jagala meM thI, jahAM para usako nigarAnI para bAra bAra jAnA par3atA thaa| vaha Aja kisI dUsarI caukI kI nigarAno karane calA gayA yA / usane jaba sunA ki baniye logoM ke kucha sAdhu prAja isa caukI para Aye haiM to usako kucha Azcarya huA aura kucha vicArane jaisI bAta bhI lgii|

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( 54 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA thor3I dera bAda vaha apane choTe caukIdAra ko sAtha lekara hamArI jhoMpar3I ke Age pAyA aura hamase kucha bAteM pUchane lagA, taba tapasvIjI ne apanI sthiti ke bAre meM kucha bAteM use batalAI / sunakara vaha kucha vicAroM meM par3a gayA aura pUchane lagA ki Apane Aja sArA dina kucha khAyA-pIyA nahIM aura aisA vikaTa rAstA isa taraha naMge pairoM calate hue yahAM pahu~ce abhI Apa kucha dUdha lenA cAheMge, to maiM Apako de sakU~gA / tapasvIjo ne kahA ki bhAI sAhaba hama loga sUryAsta hone ke bAda kucha bhI khAte-pote nhiiN| kala subaha dekhA jaayegaa| yaha sunakara vaha thAnedAra apane makAna meM calA gayA aura hama bhI khUba thake hue hone kAraNa navakAra maMtra kA smaraNa karate hue nidrAdevI ko goda meM lona ho gaye / dUsare dina subaha hone para hama loga pratikramaNAdi kriyA se nivRta hokara sUryodaya hone para jhoMpar3I meM se bAhara nikale, tA hamAre sAtha Ane vAlA caukIdAra hamAre pAsa AyA aura bolA bAbAjI maiM aba yahAM se vApasa apane gAMva jAU~gA / Apa loga yahAM se jo caukIdAra agale par3Ava kI tarapha jAyegA, usake sAtha cale jAnA. maiM usako yaha bAta kaha dUgA / caukIdAra kI isa bAta ko sunakara hamAre mana meM usake prati eka prakAra kA kRtajJatA kA bhAva utpanna huA / parantu hama sarvathA niSkIcana the / usako dene ke lie hamAre pAsa na koI paisA thA, na koI vastra thA aura na koI anya vaisI ho cIja thI, jo hama use de sakaM / kama se kama mere mana meM to yaha bAta khaTaka rahI thii| na hamAre pApa vaisA gRhastha bhI thA jisake pAsa se hama usako kucha paise Adi dilaate| hamane kevala usako do moThe zabdoM meM kahA ki bhAI tumane hama para bar3I maharabAno kI hai jisase hama kisI prakAra ko takalApha ke vinA isa caukI para paha~ca gae haiM aura aba Age bhI isI taraha pahu~ca jAyeMge / bhagavAna tumhArA bhalA kare / itane meM vaha thAnedAra apane makAna meM se nikala kara bAhara aura ziSTatA batalAte hue "namo nArAyaNa bAbAjI" aisA kahatA huaA hamAre pAsa AyA aura kahA ki bAbajI rAta ko kAI takalIpha to nahIM huI ? aba Apa yahA~ se kahAM jAnA cAhate haiM ? ityAdi bAteM pUchane lagA / hamane kahA bhusAvala kI tarapha hameM jAnA hai| yahAM se koI accho basto vAlA gAMva kitanI dUra hai aura vahAM hama kaise pahu~ca sakeMge ? isakA jarA rAstA btaaiiye| taba usane kahA ki yahA~ se 10-12 mIla kI dUrI para amuka gAMva hai / bIca kA sArA pahAr3o astA hai aura jisa taraha Apa loga kala tIna-cAra pahAr3iyA~ lA~ghakara yahAM taka pahu~ce haiM, isI taraha tIna-cAra pahAr3iyA~ lAMghane para vaha bastI vAlA gAMva AtA hai / yaha sArA jaMgalI pradeza hai, isa paccIsa mIla ke

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava " rAste meM koI bastI nahIM hai / yaha satapur3A kA bar3A jaMgala kahalAtA hai / mAlave ke nimAr3a pradeza kI tarapha se Ate hue aura Age khAna deza ke tarapha jAte hue bIca meM satapur3A kI pahAr3oM kI katAreM pAra karanI par3atI hai| hamAre jaMgalAta ke mahakameM ke nokaroM aura caukodAroM ke sivA kisI ko isa rAste AnA-jAnA manA hai| cora aura DAkU Adi ina jaMgaloM meM chipe rahate haiM / isalie unakI nigarAnI rakhane ke lie hamArI aisI aneka caukiyA~ ina pahAr3oM meM banI huI hai / Apa idhara kaise Agaye hamako Azcarya sA lagA hai / ( 55 ) hamane Apake jaise sAdhu kabhI dekheM nahIM hai / hamAre gAMva meM kucha baniye loga haiM jo jainI kahalAte haiM, para hamane vahAM Apake jaise unake gurU kabhI prAte dekhe nahIM / buniyoM se hama kabhI kabhI sunate haiM ki unake jaina guru sevar3e yA yatIjI loga hote haiM, aura ve bar3e karAmAtI hote haiM, jaMtara-maMtara, davA-dArU prAdi bhI ve karate haiM / parantu hamane unako kabhI nahIM dekhA / zrAke jaise bAbA to hamane apanI jindagI meM pahalI hI bAra dekhe haiM / sunakara tapasvIjI ne kahAki hamAre bhakta loga bar3e bar3e zaharoM meM hote haiM mAlave ke indaura, ujjaina Adi zaharoM meM hamAre bahuta bhakta haiM / isI taraha idhara dakSiNa meM bhusAvala, jalagAMva, cAlIsa gAMva Adi nagaroM meM bhI hamAre bhakta loga rahate haiM / hama sAdhu loga una logoM ko dharmopadeza sunAne ke lie idhara udhara ghUmate phirate haiM / abhI hamArA vicAra khAna deza aura dakSiNa kI tarapha jAne kA huA to hama idhara nikala Aye / parantu rAste meM sunA ki sar3aka ke bar3e rAste para hokara jAne vAloM ko Aperagar3ha kI chAvaNI ke pAsa 10 dina roka rakhate haiM aura plega roga ke TIke Adi lagAte haiM / hamArA jaina sAdhu kA jo dharma hai hama usake anusAra vaisA kara nahIM sakate / isalie hamane yaha jaMgala kA rAstA lenA pasanda kiyA / hama loga apane sAtha khAne-pIne kA kucha bhI sAmAna nahIM rakha sakate na paisA kor3I hI hama apane pAsa rakhate haiN| gAMva meM jAkara hama kisAnoM Adi ke vahAM se bhIkSA mAMga lAte haiM aura usa para apanA gujArA karate haiM / hamAre lie khAsa banAyA huprA bhojana bhI hama nahIM lete aura koI lAkara hameM bhojana de to usase bhI nahIM lete hai / ityAdi kucha sAdhu dharma kI bAteM jaba usa thAnedAra ne sunI to vaha mana meM kucha prabhAvita sA huA aura kahane lagA ki Apa hamAre yahAM sa thor3A bahuta dUdha leleM aura kucha thor3I bahuta rATiyAM bhI lekara khAleM phira Apa loga yahAM se nikala jaayeN| eka caukIdAra hamAre usa par3Ava kI caukI para jAne vAlA hai usake sAtha grApa cale jAyeM koI zAma ko 3-4 baje Apa usa gAMva ko pahu~ca jAyeMge / hamane usa thAnedAra ke vahAM jo makAna ke bAhara garama pAnI horahA thA aura usake snAna

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( 56 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA Adi karane ke lie eka bartana meM nikAla rakhA thA usako eka bar3e pAtra meM bhara liyaa| mUrti pUjaka sAdhunoM ke pAsa to pAnI lene ke lie miTTI ke ghar3e hote haiM / tathA lakar3o ke bane hue vaise hI bar3e Akara ke ghar3e numA pAtra hote haiM, jisako ve sAdhu 'loTa' kahA karate hai prAyaH ve sAdhu pAnI isI loTa meM lAte haiM aura vihAra meM bhI isI loTa meM bhara kara sAtha le jAte haiM para hamAre sampradAya meM kevala lakar3o ke khulle pAtra hI rakhane kA rivA na thA / isalie pAno lAne karane meM kucha asuvidhA kA anubhava hotA rahatA thA / hama zauca Adi kriyA se nivRta hue aura phira usa thAnedAra ke vahAM se thor3A sA dUdha liyA aura chAcha kA bar3A sA pAtra bhara liyaa| 5-7 juvArI kI roTiyAM aura kucha baiMgana kA sAga le liyA / jhoMpar3I meM baiThakara hamane vaha pAhAra kara liyaa| mana meM khayAla rahA ki zAma taka kucha khAne-pIne ke lie milane vAlA nahIM hai / usase paryApta mAtrA meM bhojana kara liyA aura Upara chAcha pIkara parama tRnto kA anubhava kiyA / kucha pAno bho sAtha meM rakhane ke lie do-tIna pAtroM meM le liyaa| hama apane kapar3e Adi zarIra para lapeTa kara calane ke lie jhoMpar3I meM se bAhara nikale / itane meM eka caukodAra jo hamAre rAste se agale par3Ava para jAne vAlA thA, vaha bhI kapar3e Adi pahanakara thAnedAra ke pAsa jA khar3A huyii| thAnedAra ne koI kAgaja usake hAtha meM de diyA aura kucha bAteM kahakara use hidAyata do gayI ki ye bAbA loga usa gAMva ko jAnA cAhate haiM so inako sAtha le jAnA aura rAste meM koI caukIdAra pUche to use kaha denA ki inako thAnedAra sAhaba ne isa rAste hokara jAne kI ijAjata dI hai, aura mujhe bhI inake sAtha sAtha calane ko kahA hai| caukIdAra ne thAnedAra ko salAma kiyA aura vaha apane ghara meM jAkara apanI aurata se kucha kaha kara, 'caliye bAbAjI' aisA hamako kahatA huaA rAste para calane lgaa| thAnedAra ne bhI namra svara meM "namo nArAyaNa" kaha kara hamako hAtha jor3e aura kahA ki prApa nirbhaya hokara cale jAiye rAste meM koI khatarA nahIM hogA ityAdi jisa taraha hama kala cale usa taraha se Aja bho calane lage / rAstA prAyaH kala ke jaisA hI thA, usI taraha eka ke bAda eka pahAr3o pAtI rahI maura hama car3hate utarate aura unako lA~ghate rahe / vaise hI chATe bar3e tona-cAra nAle rAste meM Aye / andAjana cAreka mAIla ke phAsale para hamane eka accho sI caTTAna para baiThakara pAnI pIyA, dina kA AkhidazI pAnI pI lIyA / usa samaya dina ke koI bAraha baje hoMge, caukIdAra ko hamane pUchA ki bhaiyA aba kitane ghaNTe kA Age rAstA hai to vaha bolA ki bAbAjo kama se kama cAra ghaNTe lgeNge| Apa jarA jaldI jaldI para uThAnA hamane kahA bhaiyA tuma jaise caloge vaise hama bhI tumhAre sAtha cleNge| taba usane kahA ki bAbAjI maiM to itanA jaldI calatA hU~ ki do ghaNTe meM hI rAstA pAra kara sakatA huuN| merA to hameMzA kA kAma hai para Apake

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lakavAsI saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava bAla se maiM jarA prAste ghAste calatA hU~, ityAdi kucha bAteM kahatA huA vaha calane lagA aura hama bhI usake sAtha cale / koI Der3ha ghaNTA jitanA dina bAkI thA taba hama usa satapur3e ke parvata zreNI kI AkhirI pahAr3o kI coTI para pahu~ce / vahAM se hamAre par3Ava vAlA gAMva koI 2-23 mIla ke phAsale para dikhAI par3A / parvatamAlA samApta ho raho thI ora Age kA kucha samatala maidAna dikhAI dene lagA / dUra 5-7 mIla ke phAsale para bahatI huI tAptI nadI bhI vahA~ se bundhalI sI dikhAI dii| mujhe usa dRzya ko dekhakara bahuta yAnanda prAyA / koI 10-15 minaTa vahIM khar3A hokara usa ramaNIya upatyakA ko mugdha bhAva se dekhatA rahA, pIche kI ora dekhA to vahI ghanA jaMgala aura parvatoM kI U~co-nAcI zreNiyA~ dikhAI de rahI thii| vAMyeM bAju dUra Aseragar3ha kA dhundhA sA kilA dikhAI de rahA thA / isa dRzya ko dekhakara hamAre mana meM kucha santoSa huA ki calo bar3I ghATI pAra karalI | ( 57 ) zAma hote-hote usa rAste ke AkhirI par3Ava meM hama pahu~ca gye| caukIdAra ne kahA bAbAjI vaha jo makAna dikhAI detA hai vahIM hamArI caukI hai, maiM to aba cauko para jAU~gA aura grApa loga yaha thor3I sI dUrI para sthita gAMva sA dikhAI detA hai vahA~ cale jAIye / usa gAMva meM kucha kisAnoM ke aura do-tIna agaravAla baniyoM Adi ke ghara haiM so cApako vahA~ Thaharane karane kI jagaha mila jAyegI / yaha aba sAna deza kI sImA hai idhara kI bhASA bhI kucha aura tarahakI hai, ityAdi kucha bAteM kahakara vaha caukIdAra apanI caukI kI tarapha calA gyaa| hamane kucha kRtajJatA ke bhAva bhare zabdoM se usako vidA kiyA / usa gAMva kA nAma to mujhe yAda nahIM A rahA hai / choTAsA hI gAMva thA / kAI 40 - 50 gharoM kI vastI thI kisAnoM kA pahanAvA nimAr3a ke kisAnoM se bhinna thA, gAMva meM marAThe dhanagara logoM ke dasa-bIsa ghara the, unakI bolo bhI prAdhI marAThI AdhI nImAr3I jaisI thii| do-tIna niyoM kI choTI dUkAneM thI, vahAM para jAkara hamane kahA ki hama jainiyoM ke sAtha haiM aura yahAM para rAta ko ThaharanA cahate haiM kahIM koI aisI jagaha ho to hameM batAiye jahA~ hama rAta ko Thahara jAyeM / sunakara eka daniyA jo kucha zikSita sA thA usane kahA ki gAMva ke bAhara najadIka hI sarakArI caurA hai vahA~ prApa Thahara sakate haiM / hama khUba thake hue the aura acchI taraha se bhUkhe-pyAse bhI the / isase hama jaldI jaldI paira uThAte hue usa core meM jinako marAThI meM cAvar3I kahate Ins jA baiThe aura kapar3e Adi kholakara jaldI jaldI pratikramaNa karake nidrA devI kI zaraNa meM pukha se so ge| subaha hone para pratikramaNa karake baiThe hue, to pichale do-tIna dinoM kI thakAna zarIra aisA jakar3A sA mAlUma diyA jisase Age calane kI himmata na huI isalie usa dina i

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( 58 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA vahIM Thaharakara vizrAnti lenA socA / ghaNTe-Der3ha ghaNTe bAda baniyoM tathA kisAnoM ke ghara jAkara pahale kucha nivedya pAnI mAMga lAne ke lie tapasvojI aura bar3e ziSya acaladAsajI nikale, prAyaH bhikSA lAne kA kAma vehI donoM gurU-ziSya kiyA karate the| kabhI kabhI acaladAsajI aura munnAlAlajI gocarI ke lie jAyA karate the, hama donoM choTe sAdhu kevala pAtra dhone Adi kA kAma kiyA karate the, maiM jaba taka usa sAdhu veza meM rahA taba taka kabhI gocarI lene ko nahIM gayA / dUsaroM ke parizrama se maiM apanA piMDa bharatA rahA aura baiThA -baiThA kucha na kucha par3hatA rahA / tapasvIjI pAtra meM kucha garama pAnI le pAye aura kahA~ kahA~ roTiyA~ mila sakatI hai usakA bhI kucha patA lagA paaye| phira ve donoM gurU ziSya jholo lekara baniyeM aura kisAnoM ke vahAM se kucha roTiya aura chAcha maga lAe, dApahara ke samaya hamane pAhAra kiyA thakAna miTAne ko dRSTi se sArA dina prAyaH vizrAnti lii| isa prazasa meM AhAra prAyaH eka daphA hI kiyA karate the, sAyaMkAla ke prAhAra ke lie koI avasara nahIM hotA thA / saMdhyA samaya ha ne para pratikramaNa karake navakAra maMtra smaraNa karate hue nidrA lI / para koI ghaNTA-Der3ha ghaNTA rAta bItane para hama jisa caure meM so rahe the usase prAyaH 200-300 kadama ke phAsale para kucha antyaja jAti ke ghara the, una logoM ne eka bar3A sA suara katala kiyA usa pazu ko katala ke samaya aiso bhayakara cokha mere kAna meM par3I jisako sunakara maiM atyanta udavighna hA uThA / maiMne apano jindagI meM ai7 jaghanya itya kA kabho anubhava nahIM kiyA thA / pazu ko katala karane vAle bar3I kulhAr3o se usakA galA kATa rahe the| kAI 5-7 miniTa taka yaha cillAhaTa maiM sunatA rahA, Akhira meM vaha kRtya zAnta huA / ___ maiMne tapasvIjI se pUchA ki yaha suara ko cillAhaTa kase sunAI derahI hai ? tapasvIjo usa pradeza meM pahale vicare hue the, isalie mahArASTra pradeza meM bamane vAle aise mAMsAhArI antyaja logoM kA unheM parijJAna thaa| mAlave kI apekSA dakSiNa meM aisa kAphI lAga rahate haiM jo prAyaH mAMsAhArI hote haiM dakSiNa kI mahAra, mA~ga Adi aiso antyana varga ko jAtiyA~ hai jo prAyaH suara kA mAMsa aksara khAtI rahatI haiM ye loga prasaMga-prasaga para chATe-bar3e aise suaroM ko khule Ama kullahAr3I se kATate rahate haiM, mujhe isakI koI kalpanA nahIM thI, isalie usa rAtri meM hAne vAle isa prakAra ke jaghanya kRtya kA anubhava mere mana meM eka bahuta kAlavyApI duHkhada smaraNa akita ho gayA / Aja bhI mujhe usa pazu kI ve. prANa vidAraka cIkheM mere kAna meM mAnoM guna rahI hai aisA mujhe lagA karatA hai / subaha hone para hama logoM ne vahA~ se Age calane kA upakrama kiyA, rAste meM calate samaya mere mana ko usa rAta kI ghaTanA kA vaha dukhotpAdaka smaraNa vArambAra satAtA rhaa| hama 5-7 mIla kA

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (56) vihAra kara eka gAMva meM pahu~ce / yoM do-tIna dina calane para hama bhusAvala ke nikaTa pahu~ce / relve ke bar3e pula dvArA tAptI nadI ko pAra kara hama bhusAvala pahu~ce / ____ subaha aura dopahara ko tapasvIjI zrAvakoM ko vyAkhyAna sunAte rahate the / una varSoM meM jaina sAdhunoM kA arthAt sthAnakavAsI sAdhuoM kA usa pradeza meM vicaraNa bahuta hI kama hotA rahatA thA / isalie sAdhuoM ke tarapha logoM kA bhaktibhAva acchA hotA thA / bhusAvala meM relve kA bahuta bar3A kArakhAnA hai jahA~ hajAroM loga kAma karate haiM hama loga zaucAdi ke nimitta kabhI-kabho kArakhAne kI ora nikala jAte the / usa bahuta bar3e kArakhAne meM mazInoM Adi kA bar3A zora-zarAbA hotA rahatA thaa| isalie mere mana meM yaha jijJAsA utpanna huI ki yahAM aisA zora-bakora kyoM sunAI detA hai ? sa ror maiMne sahaja bhAva se mere pAsa Akara baiThane vAle kucha yuvakoM se pUchA, taba unhoMne kahA ki isa kArakhAne meM rela ke bar3e bar3e iMjina pora Dibbe prAdi taiyAra hote rahate haiM aura usake lie bar3e-bar3e yantra aAdi lage hue haiN| mere mana meM inako dekhane ko icchA ho AI, aura maiMne unase pUchA ki kyA hama loga usa kArakhAne ko dekha sakate haiM ? taba una lar3ako ne kahA ki-kArakhAne meM jAne kI ijAjata milane para dekha sakate haiM, aura hamAre pitAjI Adi kA sabadha kArakhAne ke bar3e aphasaroM se hai, isalie vaiso ijAjata mila jAyegI / maiMne tapasvIjI se kahA ki merI icchA isa kArakhAne ko dekhane ko ho rahI hai| taba unhoMne kahA ki aisA kAravAnA hamane bhI kabhI nahIM dekhA hai, isalie apana saba eka dina dekhane ko caleM / phira usa zrAvaka bhAI ko sAtha lakara hama kArakhAnA dekhane gae / pahalI hI bAra hamane vaisA kArakhAnA dekhA jisama bar3e bhArI yantra aura cakra ghUma rahe the aura saiMkar3oM loga taraha-taraha kI mazInoM para bar3I phUti aura hoziyArI se kAma kara rahe the / bar3e bar3e baoNyalara jinameM maNoM koyalA jhoMkA jArahA thA aura unameM sa nikalatI huI Aga kI lapaToM kI garmI se pAsa gA kAma karane vAle pasInoM se tarabatara dikhAI dete the| kahIM kahIM bar3o bar3I lohe ko bhaTTiyoM meM se pighalatA huaA lohA nikala rahA thA / aura usase rela kI paTariyAM aura pahiye Adi aneka AkAra-prakAra kI cIjeM DhAlI jA rahI thiiN| kahIM rela ke iMjina jor3e jA rahe the to kahIM mAla gAr3I ke Dibbe taiyAra kiye jAte the / makAna kI garmI ko ThIka niyamita rakhane ke lie jamIna ke andara bahuta bar3e bar3e paMkhe lagAe gae the jinakI havA se kAma karane vAloM ko yathA yogya ArAma milA karatA thA / kArakhAnA itanA bar3A thA ki jisako pUrI taraha dekhane ke lie to do-tIna dina bhI paryApta nahIM

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( 60 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA hote / hamane to usake kucha mukhya mukhya 3-4 vibhAga hI dekhe aura samaya ho jAne para hama vApasa apane sthAna para cale Ae, jIvana meM aise bar3e kArakhAne ke sunane kA bhI koI prasaMga nahIM pAyA thA isalie mujhe to aisA bhAsa huA ki hamane Aja koI adbhuta jAdU sA bharA humA kAma dekhA hai / bAda ke jIvana meM to jarmanI jaipa krapa ke kArakhAne ko bhI dekhane kA maukA milA aura usake Age, bhusAvala kA yaha kArakhAnA hAthI ke Age kharagosa ke jitanA, mAlUma diyA / parantu jIvana meM yaha prathama darzana thA / isalie usakA smaraNa citra sadaiva mana para akita raha gayA / jainasAdhu ke dharma ke prAcAra ke mutAvika to aisA kArakhAnA jisameM agnikAya, vAyukAyu tathA kIr3e makor3e Adi trasakAya jaise asaMkhya jovoM kA saMhAra hotA ho, dekhanA athavA dekhane ko icchA karanA bhI pApa karma kA banda mAnA jAtA hai| usa jIvana caryA meM to maiMne phira kabhI koI vaisA kArabAnA Adi dekhane kA koI prasaga prApta nahIM kiyaa| yahAM taka kI puske chApane vAlI prinTiga mazInoM ko bhI dekhane kA prasaMga nahIM liiyaa| mana meM ye jijJAsA pichale varSoM meM to jarUra utpanna hone lagI thii| ki ye choTI-bar3I aneka pustakeM kaise chApI jAtI haiM / ityAdi ! kucha dina bhusAvala meM Thaharakara hamane Age dakSiNa kI ora prayANa kiyaa| jalagAMva, pAMcorA hote hue hama vAghalI nAmaka eka kasbe meM phuNce| phAlguna ke dina the, hama sAdhuoM ne vahA~ kezaloca kiyA / vahA~ ke zrAvaka kucha bhAvuka the, aura vahAM para kisI jaina sAdhu ne kabhI cAturmAsa nahIM kiyA thA isase una zrAvakoM ne hameM vahA~ cAturmAsa karane ke lie prAtyAgraha kiyaa| zrAvakoM ne sunA thA ki tapasvojI cAturmAsa meM 50-60 dinoM jaisoM lambI tapasyA kiyA karate rahate haiM aura isa kAraNa aneka gAMvoM se saiMkar3oM zrAvaka bhAI-bahana unake darzana ke lie AyA-jAyA karate haiM / isalie vAghalI meM cAturmApa hone para hamAre gAMva meM bhI saiMkar3oM bhAI-bahanoM kA prAvAgamana hogA aura hamako unakI bhakti Adi karane kA uttama prasaMga milegaa| tapasvojI ne zrAvakoM ke Agraha ke kAraNa Ane vAlA cAturmAsa vahA~ karane kA vicAra kiyA aura zrAvakoM ko ardhasammati sI batAI / vahA~ se hama cAlIsa gAMva pahu~ce / cAlIsa gAMva meM mUrtipUjaka sAdhu kA darzana cAlIsa gAMva meM zAyada sthAnakavAsI bhAIyoM ke koI ghara nahIM the vahA~ para kapAsa pIlane ko tIna-cAra jInIMga phaikTariyA~ thiiN| jinake mAlika kacchI jaina bhAI the| ve kacchI jaina bhAI

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava mUrtipUjaka prAmnAya vAle the to bhI sthAnakavAsI sAdhunoM kA bhI yathA yogya prAdara kiyA karate the / hama loga vahA~ para phaikTaro ke eka makAna meM jAkara Thahare, 5-10 bhAI-bahana vyAkhyAna sunane ke nimitta bhI aae| do-tIna dina bAda vahIM eka mUrtipUjaka aAmnAya ke sAdhu bho vihAra karate hue Aye, ve sAdhu prAyaH una kacchI bhAIyoM ke paricita the / unake sAtha do-tIna bhAIbahana the tathA eka naukara bho thA jo unake vastra-pAtra potho pannA Adi upakaraNa lekara calatA thA / agale dina unameM kA eka bhAI cAlIsa gAMva pahu~ca kara vahA~ ke bhAIyoM ko sUcanA dI kI kala amuka munimahArAna yahA~ padhAra rahe haiM, sA Apa svAgata Adi kI vyavasthA kareM / tadnusAra kaccho bhAI jinake ATha-dasa parivAra vahA~ rahate the unhoMne sunimahArAja ke svAgata ko taiyArI kI / jisa lambe cAlanumA makAna meM hama Thahare the, uso makAna ke eka acche se kamare meM unake Thaharane kA prabandha kiyA gyaa| do-cAra dhvajA-patAkAe bhI makAna ke A~gana meM bAMdha dI gaI / hama jisa kamare meM Thahare the vaha mAmUlIsA kamarA yA / unake kamare meM jAne kA rAstA hamAre vAle kamare ke Age hokara ho jAtA thA / hamAre aura unake kamare ke bIca meM 5-6 kamare aura the, jinameM mAlikoM kA sAmAna bharA huA thaa| kamaroM ke Age sAta-pATha phuTa caur3A, aisA lambA barAmadA thA / barAmade ke dUsare chora para jahA~ munimahArAja ke Thaharane kA kamarA thA, unake Age acchAsA lakar3o kA paTTA raba diyA gyaa| usake upara jaro, makhamala, rezamI kapar3e Adi ke bane hue hue caMduye bAMdha diye ge| baiThaka ko pIche kI ora vaisI hI pachAiyA~ lagA dA gii| ThIka nau baje ke karoba munimahAra ja phakTarI ke bar3e zrAvakoM ne to vahA~ se kucha Age jA kara sar3aka para unakA svAgata kiyA / / jasako gujarAta meM somaiyA kahate haiM) baiMDa-bAje ke sAtha unakA phaikTarI meM praveza karAyA gyaa| usa samaya zrAvakoM ke sivAya phaikTarI ke aneka anyajana bhI mammilita hue| bahaneM gIta gAtI huI cala rahI thiiN| hama logoM ko jaba yaha hAla mAlUma huA to kucha saMkoca sA mahasUsa huaa| hama loga apane kamare meM eka tarapha kivAr3a kucha Ter3he kara baiThe-baiThe svAdhyAya karane lage / itane meM ve munimahArAja makAna meM pahu~ca gaye aura zrAvakoM ke jaya-jayakAra ke sAtha hamAre makAna ke daravAje ke Age hAkara unake sthAna para gae / vahAM para kamare meM jAkara kucha kapar3e Adi utAre pora phira apanA eka acchA sA prAsana le kara usa paTTe para Akara baiTha gaye / munimahArAja kA varNa gehU~e raMga kA thA, zarIra acchA bharAvadAra thA, kada madhyama prakAra kA thA / aAvAja acchI aura surIlI thI sira para khAse keza the aura dAr3hI mUcha bhI kezoM se praccho bharI huI thii| isame mujhe AbhAsa huA ki hama logoM ko taraha unhoMne una dinoM keza

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( 62 ) loca nahIM kiyA thaa| unhoMne apanA svAgata karane vAle bhAI-bahanoM ko mAMgalika pATha sunAyA aura 10-15 minITa taka upadezAtmaka vyAkhyAna diyA / vyAkhyAna kI samApti hone para zrAvaka bhAIyoM ne upasthita janoM ko eka-eka nAriyala aura kucha per3e zrAdi diye / bAda meM munimahArAja apane kamare meM gae vahAM para unake bhaktoM ne pahale se hI garama pAnI Adi kI vyavasthA kara rakhI thI / phira phaikTarI ke mAlika seTha tathA anya bhAI-bahanoM ne munimahArAja se gocarI ke lie vinatI kI aura tadnusAra ve jholI meM pAtra Adi lekara gAcarI ke lie gae thor3I hI dera meM AhAra lekara A gaye / hamAre kamare meM bhI Akara eka zrAvaka bhAI ne gocarI ke lie kahA / hama meM se tapasvojI aura bar3e ziSya acaladAsajI hamezA ke mutabika 5-7 gharoM meM AhAra lene ke lie gae / yogya AhAra lekara Ae aura hama sabane apane niyamAnusAra AhAra- pAnI kiyA / mero jovana prapaMca maiMne mUrtipUjaka AmnAya ke sAdhu muni ko itane nikaTa se kabhI nahIM dekhA thA / yativeSa kA to mujhe ThIka-ThIka paricaya thA / yati loga jisa taraha rajoharaNa (proghA ) sIsama kA laMbA DaMDA aura lakar3I ke pAtra Adi rakhate haiM tathA jisa taraha caddara zarIra para lapeTate haiM unakA to mujhe ThIka paricaya thA / parantu mUrtipUjaka sAdhu, jo khAsa kara saMvego sAdhu kahalAte haiM, unakI veSabhUSA kA mujhe khAsa jJAna nahIM thA / isa dRSTi hamAre hI par3ausa meM prAkara Thaharane vAle aura viziSTa prakAra ke svAgata Adi samAroha pUrvaka Ae hue ukta sAdhujI ko dekhakara mere mana meM kaI prakAra ke vicitrabhAva utpanna hone lge| mAlUma huprA ki munimahArAja dhuliyAnagara kI ora se A rahe haiM aura barahAr3a sthita aMtarIkSa pAzvanAtha ko yAtrA ko jA rahe haiM / dUsare dina subaha unakA vyAkhyAna honA thA isalie hamAre pAsa to koI bhAI prAe gae nahIM / hama logoMne subaha hI vahA~ se agale gAMva kI tarapha vihAra kara diyA / 1 tapasvIjI kI icchA huI ki kucha varSoM pahale dakSiNa ke eka gAMva meM unhoMne ekAkI rUpa meM cAturmAsa kiyA thA aura vahAM ke dhanika zrAvaka ne unakI tapasyA ke nimitta Ane jAne vAle darzanArthI bhAIyoM ke bhojana-pAna Adi ke lie kAphI kharca kiyA thA, vahA~ jAe / rAste meM manamADa, lAsalagAMva Adi sthAna zrAte the, jahA~ kucha dina Thaharate hue usa gAMva meM pahu~ce gAMva kA nAma to mujhe ThIka yAda nahIM ArahA hai, choTA sA hI gAMva thA, aura godAvarI nadI ke taTa para basA huA thA relve kA sTezana hone se anAja vagairaha kI acchI maNDA thI / usa gAMva meM do-tIna ghara hI mAravAr3I zrosavAloM ke the, dakSiNa meM prAyaH adhikatara mAravAr3a ke osavAla loga saba jagaha thor3I bahuta sakhyA meM rahate haiM aura vyApAra ko kalA meM kuzala hAne ke kAraNa gAMvoM

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kI jovanAnubhava meM prAyaH ve hI acche sampanna mAne jAte haiM / hama jaba usa gAMva meM pahu~ce to mAlUma huaA ki vaha ghanika grahastha to mara cukA thA parantu usakI vidhavA strI vyApAra kA sara kAma acchI taraha calA rahI thI / do-tIna dina Thahara kara hama vahA~ se nAsika Adi sthAnoM meM hote hue ghoTo aura igatapurI taka pahu~ce / ghATI meM bhI tarasvI jI ne eka caturmAsa kiyA thA isalie una sthAnoM meM hama jaise ziSyA ke parivAra ke sAtha eka daphe ho pAne kI icchA kA honA svAbhAvika ho thA / caumAse ke dina najadIka A rahe the isalie vApasa vAghalI gAMva ko pahu~cane ke irAde se jaldI-jaldI vihAra kara caumA: ke 8-10 dina pahale vAghalI pahu~ca gae / usa caumAsa meM tapastrojo ne 60 dina ko tapasyA ko aura isa nimita dUra-dUra se saikar3oM bhAI-bahina darzanArtha pAte jAte rahe / vAghalI ke cAturbhAta meM mujhe marAThI bhASA ke jJAna kI jijJAsA utpanna huI aura maiM zrAvakoM ke lar3akoM ke pAsa se marAThI bhASA ko prArambhika skUlI pustakeM maMgavA kara maiM marAThI kA abhyAsa karane lagA taba taka maiMne koI aiso chapI huI pustakeM nahIM dekhI thii| usa samaya mahArASTra meM sAmAnya vyavahAra ke lie "mor3I" lipA kA pracAra thaa| usa lipI meM kucha prArambhika pAThyapustaka bhI chAtI thI so kautuhala vasAta maiMne usa lipi ke bhI par3hane kA abhyAsa kiyA / vAghalI se ahamadanagara kI aura vihAra - cAturmAsa ke bAda tapasvIjI kI icchA huI kaH ahamada nagara jile kI tarapha unake bar3e gurU bhAI campAlAlajI rahA karate haiM unase milane ke lie jaaeN| isalie hamane usa pradeza kI tarapha vihAra kiyA / pahale hama aoraMgAbAda gae / vahA~ para usa samaya haidarAbAda ke navAba kA rAjya thA aura musalamAnoM kI kAphI bar3I saMkhyA thii| eka bAjAra aisA dekhane meM AyA jahA~ para kasAiyoM kI dukAneM adhika thI, parantu unakI dukAnoM ke pAsa hI kucha prosavAla baniyoM kI bhI paracunI dukAneM tho / musalamAna, kasAI kI dukAna se eka hAtha meM mAMsa miTTo lekara pAsa ke baniye kI dukAna se khAne-pIne kI anya cIjeM kharIdA karate the / una baniyo kA aisA vyavahAra dekha kara mere mana meM bahuta ghRNA utpanna huI / paise hI ko paramezvara samajhane vAle una baniyoM ko usakA kabhI koI khayAla nahIM prAtA thaa| mere mana meM una batiyoM ke prati eka prakAra kA tiraskAra bhAva huaa| yadyapi unameM kA koI koI bhAI hamAre pAsa Akara vyAkhyAna sunA karate the aura muha para muMha patI

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( 64 ) bAMdhakara sAmAyika bhI kiyA karate the| unake dila meM zAyada aisA qhayAla hogA ki dharma kA, vyavahAra ke sAtha koI sambandha nahIM hai / 5-7 dina bhoMragAbAda meM Thahara kara daulatAbAda hote hue hama eka usa choTe gAMva meM jAkara rUke jahA~ se suprasiddha elorA kI guphAeM loga dekhane jAyA karate haiM hama bhI dUsare dina elorA kI guphAeM dekhane gae / yadyapi mujhe usa samaya una gupha proM kA koI itihAsa mAlUma nahIM thA ki kisane, kaba aura kaise ye bar3I-bar3I guphAyeM banAI / una guphAoM ko dekhane ke lie sadaiva aneka loga Ate rahate haiM / hamane bhI unhIM kI taraha una gukAnoM ko khUba ghUmara kara dekhIM aura pahAr3a kI bar3I caTTAneM kATa-kATa kara unameM aise bar3e mandira tathA bar3I mUrtiyA~ Adi kisa taraha banAI gaI hogI, isakA Azcarya mugtra hokara avalokana karate rheN| koI 4-5 ghaNTe una guphAoM ko dekhane meM vyatIta kara hama samaya ho jAne para vApasa usa gAMva meM Agae aura rAtri vahIM vyatIta kI / dUsare dina vahA~ se phira vihAra kara kaI gAMvoM meM paribhramaNa karate hue hama vArI nAmaka gAMva meM gae / vArI gAMva kA paricaya mero jovana prapaMca kathA vahA~ para tapasvIjI ke gurU AmnAya valI cAra-pA~ca sAdhviyAM thI unako darzana dene kI dRSTi se hI tapasvIjI ne vahA~ jAnA pasanda kiyA thaa| una sAdhviyoM meM eka sAdhvI usI gAMva ke eka acche sampanna kuTumba kI thI jo bAla vivavA ho jAne para sAdhvI bana gaI thI / vaha marAThI kI 6-7 kitAbe par3hI huI thIM aura usI pradeza meM vicarate rahane kAraNa marAThI bhASA bolane kA usako acchA abhyAsa thA / vArI gAMva eka choTA sA kasbA thA jahA~ prosavAla jainiyoM ke 10-12 ghara the para ve satra Arthika dRSTi se acche sampanna se the / vArI gAMva 'peTha' arthAt maNDI kI dRSTi se prasiddha thA / vahA~ para eka videzI vyApArika kampanA kA aDDA thA / yaha kampanI (rAlI bandarsa) nAma se dakSiNa meM kAphI mazahUra thI aura isa kampanI kI kaI jagaha praoNphiseM thIM / yaha kampanI khAsakara ke anAja kI kharIdI kiyA ka tI thI cora hajAroM maga anAja videzoM meM bhejA karatI thI / vArI meM isake do-tIna bar3e-bar3e gArAma bane hue the jo vahA~ rahane vAle dotIna jaina dhanikoM ne banavAyeM the / pranAja kA saMgraha bhI prathama ye loga hI karate the / aura phira unase ukta kampanI bar3e jatthe meM anAja kharIda letA thI / isalie vahA~ ke jaina bhAIyoM kA vyApAra dhandhA bahuta acchA cala rahA thA / gAMva ke pAsa meM hI doMDa-manamAr3a relve lAIna kA choTA sA sTezana thA vahA~ se sIjana meM anAja ke hajAroM bore bambaI Adi sthAnoM meM bheje jAte the / maNDo

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sthAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ke kAraNa gAMva kA choTA sA bAjAra bho khUba coDA prora sApha sutharA lagatA thaa| jena vyApAriyoM ke sivA 10-2, ghara anya dakSiNI logoM ke the| yaha kasvA gadAvarI nadI ke taTa para basA huA thaa| isake sa mane vAle tIra para saMbacchara nAnA acchA sA purAnA kasbA thA / jahA~ pezavAoM ke samaya meM kisA jAgIradAra kA ThikANA thA / isa gAMva ke kAraNa usa tAluke meM vAro saMvacchara aime sayukta nAma se vaha sthAna pahacAnA jAtA thA / usa gAMva vAle zrAvakoM ne tapasvIjI kI tapasyA kI mahimA sunakara hI hameM vahA~ para cAturmAsa karane kA pratyAgraha kiyA aura una sAdhviyoM kA bhI vahI caturmAsa rahane kA vicAra huA / isalie unhoMne bhI tapasvojoM ko vahA~ cAturmAsa karane kI prArthanA kI / mujhe bhI usa gAMva kI sthiti acchA lagI, isalie maiMne bhI vahA~ cAturmAsa karane kA apanA vicAra pradarzita kiyA / isa prakAra koI mahinA bhara hama vArI gAMva meM rhe| phAlguna mAsa zrA jAne para usa kAla kA keza-loca bhI vahA~ kiyA / holo ke dinoM ke bAda hamane vahA~ se ahamada nagara kI tarapha jAne kA prayAga kiyaa| kaI dinoM ke bihAra bAda hama loga vAmborI nAmaka gAMva meM pahu~ce / una dinoM campAlAla jI vahA~ hI the| unake sAtha eka bar3I umra kA ziSya bhI thA. jo pUrvAvasthA meM kaccha kA rahane vAlA thaa| tapasvIjI apane bar3e gurU bhAI se bahuta prAnanda pUrvaka mile : campAlAla jI ko bahuta harSa huA / campAlAlajI kI vyAkhyAna zailI kA paricaya hama upara likha cuke haiN| vAmborI meM unakA vyAkhyAna sunane ke lie kaI jaina-ajaina bhAI aAyA karate the, jisakA prabhAva mere mana para acchA par3ane lgaa| kucha dina bAda campAlAla jI ke sAtha hama rAhUrI gAMva gye| vahA~ para hamArA amolaka RSijI nAmaka sAdhu mahArAja se milanA huaaa| ve sAdhu mahArAja sthAnavAsI sampradAya meM eka acche vidvAn sAdha mAne jAte the / unakA nAma hamane kaI daphe suna rakhA thA / hamArA sAdhu sampradAya bhinna thA aura ve RSi sampradAya vAle kahalAte the| unake gurU triloka Rpijo the / jo ahamadanagara Adi ke pradeza meM adhikatara vicarA karate the / triloka RSijI acche kavi the, unhoMne aneka prakAra ke stavana, sajjAya (svAdhyAya) DAla, cIpa I aAdi aneka cha'TI-bar3I racanAe~ deza bhASA meM kI thI / amolaka RSijI ne dakSiNa hedarAbAda meM raha kara jaina sUtroM ke chapavAne kA sava prathama prayatna kiyA thA / hama sAdhuoM kA paraspara vandana vyavahAra nahIM thA, tathA AhAra pAnI kA bhI paraspara lena dena kA sambandha thA, tathApi saumanasva bhAva ThIka thA / isalie yaha sAdhu milana mujhe bahata prAnanda dAyaka lgaa| maiM to bilkula nayA aura adhika jAnakAra nahIM thA tathApi unake prati mere mana meM kAphI vinamra bhAva utpanna ho gayA thA / prasaMgavaza eka bAra prAcAraMga sUtra ke kisI pATha ke viSaya meM koI carcA cala pdd'o| amA

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( 66 ) mero jovana prapaMca kA laka RSijI ko vaha pATha kahA~ para hai ise dekhane ko AvazyakatA utpanna huI / hamAre pAra prAcArAMga sUtra kI eka TabbArtha vAlI pothI thI, jise unhoMne dekhanA caahaa| bahuta dera taka ve usa pothI ke panne ulaTAte rahe taba maiMne kahA ki Apa mujhe isa pothI ko de deM, jisase maiM vaha pAna jaldI nikAla sakU / yU aAcArAMga sUtra kA prathama zrU taskaMdha to mere kaMThastha thA parantu dUsarA zrU tatkaMdha bhI maiMne kucha2 par3hA thA / isalie maiMne turanta ho vaha sUtra pATha nikAlakara amolaka RSikI ke hAtha meM rakhA taba ve yaha devakara bahuta prasanna hue aura mujhe AgamoM ke adhyayana kI khAsa hidAyata kii| parantu tapasvojI ke sAtha rahane se mujhe vizeSa jJAna ko prApti kI koI pAzA nahIM thii| kaI dinoM taka hamArA usa gAMva meM unake sAtha samAgama meM rahanA huprA / unhoMne jo jaina sUtroM kA mudraNa kArya karAyA / usa kI vizeSa jAnakAro to mujhe bahuta varSoM bAda huI / usa samaya to maiM itanA hI jAna sakA ki ye jaina sUtroM ke bahuta acche abhyAsA haiM / campAlAla jI aura tapasvojI unake utane prazaMsaka nahIM mAlUma diye| ye donoM gurU bhAI Apasa meM bAteM kiyA karate the ki amolaka RSi zithilAcArI sAdhu haiM, ityAdi / vahA~ se hama campAlAlajI ke sAtha vihAra karate hue ahamadanagara ge| kucha dina sAtha raha kara cAturmAsa ke dina najadoka Ane para hama logoM ne vApasa vArI nAmaka gAMva kI tarapha vihAra kiyA / campAlAla jI vahIM ahamadanagara meM rhe| yevalA Adi sthAnoM meM hote hue ASAr3ha mahine meM hama vArI pahu~ce / yevalA ke pAsa eka gAMva meM jahA~ kucha zrAvakoM ke 10-15 ghara the aura vahA~ kabhI koI sAdhuoM kA AnA jAnA nahIM hotA thA, usa gAMva vAloM ne kisI sAdhu yA sAdhvI kA cAturmAsa karAne kI vinatI kI to munnAlAlajI kI icchA vahA~ para alaga cAturmAsa rahane ko huI / tapasvIjI ne unako bahuta AgrahavAlo icchA ko jAnakara vahAM cAturmAsa rahane ko prAjJA dedo / isase ve pitA-putra donoM vahAM raha gae / isa prakAra vArI ke cAturmAsa meM hama tIna hoM sAdhu raha gae / vArI gAMva kA cAturmAsa ___ vahAM 4-5 sAdhvIyoM kA samudAya bhI thA aura zrAvaka bhI kucha vizeSa bhAvuka the isalie usa cAturmAsa meM hamako kisI prakAra kI nyUnatA mahasusa nahIM huii| cAturmAsa ke nivAsa ke lie vahAM para jo eka acchA bar3A anAja ke saMgraha nimita godAma banA huA thaa| vaha pasaMda kiyA gayA / makAna kha sA labA-caur3A thA, boca meM eka bar3A daravAjA thA, agala bagala meM tIna-tIna dukAneM thI aura unake

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sthAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (67 ) *mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm pIche vizAla dAlAna thA jisameM hajAra prAdamI eka sAtha baiTha sake aisI khulI havAdAra jagaha thii| hama sAdhuoM ke Thaharane ke lie eka tarapha kA dukAnoM kA bhAga thaa| dUsarI tarapha ke bhAga meM sAdhvoyoM ko jagaha dI gaI aura jo koI zrAvaka bhAI bahana darzanArtha pAveM unake bhI Thaharane kI vyavasthA usa tarapha kI gii| cAturmAsa ke prAraMbha hote hI 5 dina bAda tapasvI mI ne 65 dina kI laMbI tapasyA kA paccakkhANa (pratyAkhyAna lIyA / upara hama kaI jagaha kaha pAe haiM ki tapasvIjI cAturmAsa meM hamezA 50-60 dinoM jainI laMbI tapasyA kiyA karate the| isa varSa unhoMne 65 dina arthAta 2 mahine aura 5 dina jaise lo samaya ke upavAsa karanA nizcita kiyaa| 5-10 dina bItane para zrAvakoM ne tapasyA viSayaka bar3I patrikAeM chapavAkara aneka gAMvoM meM jaina bhAiyoM ko bhijavA dii| isalie dhIre-dhIre gAMvoM se chuTakara bhAI-bahana tapasvI jI ke darzanArtha pAne zuru ho gye| jyoM-jyoM dina votate jAte tyoM-tyoM loga adhika saMkhyA meM pAne lge| Ane vAle bhAI vahana 2-2, 4-4 dina vahAM Thaharate, jinakI gAMva vAle zrAvaka bhAI bar3e utsAha pUrvaka bhojana mAdi dvAra sevA karate the| tasvojI ke anusaraga meM jo baDI sAdhvIjI vahAM thI unane bhI 35 dina ke upavAsa karane prArabha kiye, isI taraha eka anya vidhayA bahina bhI jo una sAdhviyoM ke saMsarga nimita vahAM dUsare gAMva se pAkara rahI thI usane bhI eka mahine ke upavAsa karanA nizcita kiyaa| AhAra karane vAle hama do sAdhu arthAta acaladAsajo aura meM donoM gurubhAI rhe| acaladAsajI hamezA zrAvakoM ke yahAM jAkara yathA yogya AhAra pAno bahara lAyA karate the| harane bho dina meM eka hI bAra pAhAra karane kA niyama le liyA thA / tapasvIjo sadaiva prAtaH ghaMTA DeDa ghaNTA vyAkhyAna diyA karate the, unake pAsa vyAkhyAna meM paTTa para acaladAsajI baiThA karate the / maiM usa dukAnanumA kamare meM akelA baiThA-baiThA apanA svAdhyAya karatA rahatA thaa| kabhI-kabho sAdhvIjI ko do-tIna ziSyAeM bhI vahAM Akara baiTha jAtI aura mujhase kucha thA kar3e Adi kA pATha liyA karatI / / bIca-bIca meM unako dazavaikAlIka ke prathama ke 4 cAra adhyayana bhI maiM par3hAyA karatA thA aura sAtha meM TabbArtha bhI samajhAyA karatA thaa| dopahara ke bAda tapasvojI usa bar3e dAlAna vAle khule makAna meM prAsana lagAkara baiTha jAte the| aura darzanArtha pAne vAle bhAI-bahanoM se vividha prakAra kI bAteMcIne kiyA karate the bar3I sAdhvI bhI apanI eka ziSyA ke sAtha pAkara baiTha jAtI thii| merA mana marAThI bhASA sikhane meM lagA huA thaa| maiM socatA thA ki jisa taraha campAlAla jo marAThI bhASA meM vyAkhyAna dete rahate haiM aura tukArAma, nAmadeva Adi ke abhaMgoM, padoM Adi ko gA gA kara sunAyA karate haiM usI taraha maiM bhI marAThI bhASA meM acchI taraha vyAkhyAna dene kA abhyAsa karU / isalie maiM marAThI kI choTI-choTo pAThyapustakeM lar3akoM se maMgavA kara par3hatA rahatA thA ! merA aisA vicAra jAnakara una choTI sAdhviyoM ne mere sAtha marAThI meM hI vArtAlApa karanA zuru kiyaa| paraMtu mere

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(68) merI jIvana prapaMca kara uccAra utane zuddha nahIM hote the isalie vaha eka choTI sAdhavI jo marAThI bahuta acchA par3hanA-bolanA jAnatI thIM usane mere uccAroM ko zuddha banAne kA, zikSikA kA kArya zuru kiyaa| yU vaha mere se umra meM bhI kucha bar3oM thI aura dikSA bho mere se pahale hI lI thI parantu maiM guru pada kA dhAraka hone ke nAte usake mana meM kucha saMkoca huA karatA thaa| vArI meM ajJAta zikSaka se svalpa samAgama unhIM dinoM eka mahArASTrIya zikSaka bhAI jo usI gAMva ke rahane vAle the aura kahIM bar3e gA~va meM eka skUla ke acche se zikSaka the unase merA milanA huyaa| unhoMne gAMva ke jaina bhAiyoM se sunA ki yahAM para eka bar3e jaina sAdhu cAturmAsa rahe hue haiM aura unhoMne 65 dina jitane lambe upavAsa vAlo tapasyA zuru kI hai isalie ve bhI, aura logoM kI taraha tapasvIjI ke darzanAtha pAe / zrAvakoM ke lar3akoM se unako mAlUma huA ki maiM marAThI bhASA kA Thoka ThIka jJAna prApta karanA cAhatA hUM to ve apanI sahaja bhAva kI jijJAsA se mere pAsa Akara baitthe| unako jaina sAdhu kI caryA kA vizeSa paricaya nahIM thA / paraMtu eka zikSaka hone ke nAte mujhase kucha prazna pUchane lge| maiMne jo kucha do cAra bAteM unase kahIM to ve kahane lage ki yadi Apako koI saMkoca na ho to maiM kucha Apake prAcAra-vicAra ke bAre meM adhika jAnanA cAhatA hUM so maiM kabhI-2 pAkara aApase aimA vArtAlApa karanA cAhatA hU~ / mujhe unakI bAtacIta kI zailI aAkarSaka lagI aura mujhe lagA ki maiM bhI unase kucha jJAna prApta kara sakatA hU~ yaha soca kara maiMne unase saharSa kahA ki Apa jarUra mujhase aisA vArtAlApa kara sakate haiM / hamAre sAdhu dharma ke prAcAra ke mutAbika hama kisI grahastha kA aisA nahIM kaha sakate ki Apa avazya Ate rahiye, isase hamako bhI prasannatA hogI aura hameM bhI kucha jAnane ko milegA ityaadi| phira ve kaI dinoM taka mere pAsa niyamita ghaMTA-do ghaMTA Ane lage aura khAsa karake jaina dharma ke bAre meM bahuta sI bAteM pUchate rahe / unako maiMne pUchA ki marAThI bhASA kA ThIka jJAna prApta karane ke liye kina pustako kA vAcana karanA cAhiye ? taba unhoMne pUchA ki Apako ruco kisa viSaya ko khAsa jAnane kI rahatI hai ? maiMne sahaja bhAva se kahA ki mujhe deza aura dharma kA itihAsa jAnane kI adhika jijJAsA rahatI hai, taba unhoMne prArambha meM deza kA itihAsa jAnane ke lie do cAra choTI pustakoM ke nAma batala.e / maiMne kahA mujhe rAjapUta jAto kA itihAsa jAnane kI adhika icchA rahatI hai| maiMne

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sAnakavAsa saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava yaha to unako nahIM batAyA ki merA janma kisa jAtI meM huA hai parantu mero janma bhUmi rA - putAne meM hone se maiM usa deza kA itihAsa par3hanA cAhatA hU~ aisA maiMne unama kahA / phira zikSakajI ne svayaM dA-tIna marAThI ko itahAsa kI pustakeM lA do, jinameM eka zivAjI ke itihAsa viSaya meM tho, dUsaro rAjapUtoM ke itihAsa viSaya ko thI / maiMne unameM se sabase pahale rAjapUnA ke itihAsa viSayaka pu takoM ko par3hanA zurU kiyaa| isameM cauhAna, paramAra, rAThaur3a, gahalota, pratihAra Adi kaI rAjapUta vazoM kA saMkSipta meM itihAsa diyA gayA thaa| itihAsa viSaya jJAna kI merI koI pUrva bhUmikA nahIM thI aura nAMhIM, maiMne kabhI koI aisI vyavasthita DhaMga se likhA gaI pustaka dekhI yA sunI thii| usa pustaka ke par3hane se mere andhakAramaya mana meM, jaise kisI andherI kuTiyA meM miTTI ke diye ke dhundhale prakAza jaisA koI nayA prAbhAsa hAne lagA, ve zikSaka rASTra premI the| una dinoM mahArASTra meM baMga-bhaMga ko lekara samAcAra patroM meM agrejoM ko noti ke virUddha bahuta se una vicAroM ke lekha chapA karate the unameM sva. lokamAnya tilaka ke marAThI, kesarI patra kA viziSTa sthAna thA, usa patra meM uttejanAtmaka aneka rAjanIti sambandhita lekha chapA karate the| eka dina ve zikSaka mere pAsa Aye to unake hAya meM kesarI patra ke do cAra purAne aMka the| usameM kisI vidvAna kA likhA humA eka lekha chA huvA thA / jisameM yaha batAyA gayA thA ki kisa taraha aMgrejoM ne apanI rAjanIti kI kuTila cAloM se rAjapUtAne ke rAjapUta rAjyoM ko niHsatva banAyA aura mahArASTra meM marAThoM kI rAjya sanA ko naSTa kiyA ityAdi / zikSakajI ne kesarI patra ke ve 3-4 aka mujhe diye aura bole ki isake par3hane se Apako marAThI bhASA kA bhI ThIka paricaya hogA aura deza ke itihAsa kI bhI kaI bAtoM kA jJAna milegaa| phira zikSakajI ne mujhe lokamAnya tilaka ke bAre meM kucha vizeSa paricayaM karAyA aura unake dvArA deza meM cala raho rAjakIya ghaTanAoM kA bhI pUrva itihAsa samajhAyA / unako lagA ki mero rUci kucha isa viSaya meM jAnane meM jAgRta ho rahI hai aura utsukatA pUrvaka maiM unakI bAteM sunatA rahatA hU~ / isalie ve do-tIna ghaNTe mere pAsa baiThe rahate aura deza tathA dharma ke viSaya ke aneka vicAra pradarzita karate rahate the / unako ye saba bAteM sunakara mere andhakAra pUrNa ajJAna mastiSka meM koI naI AbhA kI sukSma kiraNeM praveza kara rahI ho aisA pratibhAsa hone lagA / mujhe abhI taka jJAna ke usa kSetra kA koI paricaya nahIM huA thaa| abhI taka jo kucha maiMne thor3A bahuta jAnA thA usase mere mana meM jaina AgamoM kA aura jaina dharma ke sAtha sambandha rakhane vAle prAcAra vicAroM kA adhyayana karanA hI jIvana kA mukhya lakSya banA huA thaa| isake pahale mujhe ina zikSaka jaise kisI. supaThita purUSa kA koI samAgama nahIM huA thaa| merI jijJAsA ko jAnakara una zikSaka ne mujhe do cAra marAThI kI aisI choTI pustakeM lAkara dI, jinameM baMgAla ke rAjA rAmamohanarAya, svAmI vivekA

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{ 70 ) mero jovana prapaMca nanda, bAbU aravinda ghoSa tathA kucha krAntikArI purUSoM kI jIvaniyA~ thI / maiM una pustakoM rasa pUrvaka dhyAna meM par3hane lagA, hama sAdhu loga na kabhI kisI akhabAroM ko hAtha meM lete aura na kabhI par3hate hI the tathA aise viSayoM kI na koI pustakeM hI dekhI thI aura na par3I thI jIvana meM pahalI hI bAra isa samaya koI akhabAra dekhane meM pAyA aura vaha bhI marAThI kasu, siddha kesarI patra ! 10-15 dina ke bAda ve zikSaka to apane sthAna para cale gae para unI usa alpakAlina samAgama ne mere mAnasa kSetra meM aise bIja DAla diye jo Age calakara aneka meM aMkurita hue aura mere jIvana krama meM viziSTa parivartana karane vAle bneN| una zikSaka kA / mujhe naHma hI mAlUma rahA aura na kabhI unakI koI vizeSa smRti hI huI kevala mana meM itana hAyaspaSTa smaraNa aMkita ho gayA ki unake samAgama se mere mana kA rUha lakSya vicalita hore lgaa| jisa eka bAI ne bar3I sAdhvI ke sAtha eka mahine kA upavAsa karanA prArambha kiyA thA usakI bar3I karUNa kahAnI mere jAnane meM AyI / vaha bAI jo ukta choTI sAdhvo thI usake nananda hoto thii| usake pitA ne eka acche lakhapatI dhanika ke sAtha usako byAha dI thI, jisake umra 55 varSa se adhika tho aura jo kSaya roga se pIr3ita thaa| usa dhanika kI pahalI strI kuha varSa pahale mara gaI thI aura vaha ni:saMtAna thaa| usake vRddha mAtA-pitA maujUda the, unhoMne jAna hue bhI ki hamArA lar3akA kSaya rAga se nihIta hai aura kucha hI dinoM kA mehamAna hai| taba bhI unhoMne kisI prakAra apanA lagAva laMgAkara usa lar3akI ke mAM-bApoM ko samajhA bujhA kara usakI zAdI karavAdI / mA-bapa jAnate the tA bhI baDe seTha ke ghara meM laDakI jAyegI aura usake dhA kA koI khAsa hakadAra na hone se lar3akI hI mAlika bana jAyego isa prakAra kI kussota bhAvana se usa lar3akI kA byAha kara diyA gyaa| lar3ako kApho samajhadAra thA ora marAThI 7-8 kitAba taka par3hI huI thI bahata svarUpavAna aura suzola svabhAva ko tha. pAtu aiso abodha bAlAoM ko rUDhI priya aura nitAnta vicAra hIna mAtA-pitAoM ke sAmane kyA cala sakatA hai ? koI * 10 mahine bAda usa lar3akA kA vaha pati ura nirAdhAra chor3akara svarga ko calA gayA / mahinoM taka vaha lar3akI apane durbhAgya ko kosato raho aura dina rAta karUga krandana karatI rahI usakA na khAnA-pInA acchA lagatA thA na kisI se vaha bAta-cIta ho karato thiiN| jaba mAtra pitA ne use apane yahA~ le jAnA cAhA to vaha sApha-inkAra ho gii| vRddha sAsu zvasura jarA so jhadAra the aura kucha dhArmika bhAva vAle bhI the isalie unhoMne socA ki kahIM aise sAdhu sana ke pAsa le jAyA jAya jis| isake mana ko kucha zAnti mile / unhoMne jaba sunA ki vA For Private & Personal Use Only

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saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava mAM meM tapasvIjI mahArAja kA cAturmAsa hai aura unhoMne lambI tapasyA karanI zurU kI hai tathA vahA~ para kucha sAdhviyA~ bhI hai jinameM usa lar3akI ko eka bhAz2AI bhI hai aura bar3o sAdhvIjI ne bhA 35 dina ke upavAsa zurU kiye haiM taba ve loga usa bAI ko lekara vAroM meM Ae aura vahA~ para unako chor3akara kucha dina dUra rahane kI dRSTi se ve vApasa apane gAMva cale gaye / vaha bAI una sAdhviyoM ke pAsa hI rahane lago aura usakI jo bhojAI sAccI thI usane usako aneka prakAra kA sokhanA denI zurU kii| dhIre dhIre usa vAI kA mAnasika vAtAvaraNa badalane lagA aura vaha kucha sAnAyaka Adi dharma kriyAeM karane meM lagane lagI / una sAdhviyoM ke sAtha rahate hue usake mana meM bhA huyA ki maiM bhI kyoM na aisI tapasyA karUM jisase mere karmoM kA kSaya ho jAya / aisA vicAra kara usa bhI eka mahine ke upavAsa karane prArambha kiye / usake isa prakAra 1 mahine ke upavAsa kI bAteM sunakara anya riztedAra bhI usakI khabara karane Ane lage / isa prakAra zrAvaNa-bhAdatre ke dinoM meM meM vArI meM eka acchA dhArmika evaM tAsyA kA vAtAvaraNa jamA rahA / eka hindu sanyAsino ko Agamana ( 71 ) eka dina hindu sanyAsinI ke jaisA bhagavA bheSa dhAraNa ko huI pror3havayavAlI aura dikhane meM suzIla aisI eka mahilA hamAre usa dharma sthAna meM prAyIM usane gale meM rudrAkSa kI mAlA pahana rakhI thI, aura zarIra para bhagave raMga kI laMbI kaphanI pahana rakhIM thI - hAtha meM vaisA hI bhagave raMga kA bar3A sA jhola thA jisameM usake kucha kapar3e, pAnI pone kA loTA yAdi sAmAna thA eka bagala meM kucha choTA sA baTA thA jisameM mone Adi ke kaMbala jaise do-cAra vastra the| maiM dopahara ke samaya usa dukAnanumA kanare meM baiTha huA una sAdhviyoM ko kucha par3hA rahA thA aura do tIna bahaneM bhI vahAM para baiThI huI thii| relve sTezana se utarakara vaha sanyAsinI sI mahilA hamAre sAmane dukAna ke Age cauMtare para Akara baiThI, do cAra miniTa taka vaha cupacApa baiThI rahI aura maiM jo una sAdhviyoM ko kucha paDhA rahA thA maura usako vaha zAMta mana se sunato rhii| mere mana meM huA ki yaha kauna bAI haiM? taba maiMne dhIre se unase pUchA ki kyoM mAIjI tuma yahAM kisa lie kara baiThI ho / taba vaha dhIre se bolI ki maiMne sunA hai ki yahAM koI sAdhu mahArAja 65 dina ke laMbe upavAsa kara rahe haiM tathA kucha bahaneM bhI aise lambe upavAsa kara rahI haiN| maiMne gAr3I meM baiThe hue kucha logoM - se ye bAteM sunI taba mere mana meM huA ki maiM bhI aise tapasvIjanoM ke darzana karU aura unase kucha jJAna prApta karU, ityAdi kucha bAteM mahilA ne kaho jinako sunakara mere mana meM kucha vizeSa vicAra Ane lage / maiMne unase pUchA ki mAIjI zrApa kahAM se prArahI haiM aura kahAM jAnA cAhato haiM ? tathA prApane yaha bhagavAM

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(72) merI jIvana prapaMca kA veSa kyoM dhAraNa kiyA hai aura kahAM kI rahane vAlI haiM ? taba usane kahA ki maiM haradvAra kI tarapha se mA rahI hU~ aura idhara Age dakSiNa meM rAmezvara kI yAtrA karane jA rahI huuN| merI janma bhUmi baMgAla hai jahAM para paramahaMsa, svAmI rAmakRSNa aura svAmI vivekAnanda jaise mahApuruSa ho gaye haiN| maiMne svAmI vivekAnanda kI ziSyA bhaginI niveditA ke Azrama meM kucha zikSA pAI hai| maiMne aMgrejI kI bhI ucca zikSA prApta ko hai aura bAbu aravindaghoSa jaise dezabhakta puruSoM ke aneka vyAkhyAna sune haiN| isase mere mana meM gRhastha jIvana meM na par3akara sanyAsa dharma kI dIkSA lekara deza aura samAja kI sevA karane ke bhAva utpanna hue aura phira kalakatte meM hamAre deza ke svAmInoM kA eka maTha hai jisameM kaI bar3e vidvAna, vakIla, DAkTara Adi sanyAsI banakara rahate haiM aura ve deza ke aneka bhAgoM meM jAkara logoM ko deza kI aura dharma kI sevA karane kA upadeza Adi dete rahate haiN| hamAre vahAM eka aisI hI bar3I vidUSI mAtAjI sanyAsI ke rUpa meM rahatI haiM / maiM vahAM rahakara vaisA sevA kArya karatI rhiiN| phira merI icchA kucha dezadarzana karane kI aura tartha yAtrA karane kI huI isalie maiM yaha paribhramaNa karane ke lie nikala par3I huuN| maiMne haradvAra ke pAsa eka Azrama meM 1-2 varSa bitAye aura vahAM para eka svAmIjI ke pAsa se yoga aura prANAyAma kI bahutasI kriyAeM siikhiiN| hamAre baMgAla deza meM kucha deza premI bahuta se navayuvaka hai jo aMgrejo sarakAra ke viruddha bar3e AMdolana karate rahate haiM / una meM se kaIyo ko pakar3a pakar3a kara agreja sarakAra ne jeloM meM DAla khe hai / idhara mahArASTra ke deza bhakta tilaka mahArAja bhI hamAre deza ke yuvakoM ke prati bar3I sahAnubhUti rakhate haiM aura apane patroM meM lekhAdi prakaTa karate rahate haiM / pUnA isa prakAra kA bahuta bar3a jAgrati kA kendra hai| isalie maiM yahAM se pUnA jAnA cAhatI hU~ ityAdi bahuta sI bAteM usa mahilA ne jI kholakara hama logoM ke sAmane kahIM - maiM tathA ve sAdhviyAM bhI isa aparicita mahilA kI bAteM bahuta mugdha bhAva se sunate rhe| mere liye yaha saba bar3I vicitra bAteM thIM inakA kucha rahasya usa samaya merI samajha meM nahIM pAyA, maiMne isase pahale sanyAsinI dikhane vAlI mahilA ke mukha se aisI bAteM sunane kI kabhI koI kalpanA nahIM kI thii| isase pUrva kucha hI dina pahale ukta mahArASTrIya zikSakajI ke dvArA jo deza bhakti Adi ke bAre meM kucha sunA thA usoM se milatI julatI kucha bAteM isa mahilA ke mukha se bhI sunakara mujhe eka prakAra kA vismaya sA hone lgaa| phira usa mahilA ne kahA ki maiM ra hAM do cAra dina rahanA cAhatI hU~ aura Apa logoM kI aisI laMbI tapasyA Adi kA anubhava karanA cAhatI hU~, to merA yahAM kahIM Thaharane kA prabadha ho sakatA hai ? maiM dina meM eka hI bAra bhojana karata hU~ aura koro jamIna para arane pAsa jo Asana hai usako bichA kara usa para so jAto huuN| subaha zAma kahIM ekAnta meM baiThakara maiM apanA bhajana pATha Adi karato rahata hai| yaha sunakara maiM to vicAra meM par3a gayA, maiM usakA kyA javAba duu| yaha socane lagA paraMtu usa vicakSaNa laghu sAdhvI ne kahA ki ye mAtAjI, merI mAtA ke pAsa raha sakatI haiM / jaisA ki upara maiMne sUcita

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ( 73 ) -. wwwAHAmwww... kiyA ki vaha sAdhvI usI gAMva kI rahane vAlo thI aura usakI mAtA jo vidhavA thI lekina acchI sampanna thI aura udAra mana vAlI tathA dAna-puNya karane kI bhAvanA vaaliiN| usakA makAna acchA bar3A thA aura usa samaya hama logoM ke darzanArtha Ane vAle kaI janoM kA nivAsa usake makAna meM hotA rahatA thA tathA khAna-pAna prAdi kI bhakti bhI vaha zrAvikA acchI taraha kiyA karatI thii| usakA vaha ghara bhI, hama logoM ke nivAsa sthAna ke sAmane vAle caur3e bAjAra meM samIpa hI yA, itane meM vaha zrAvikA bhI sAdhviyoM ke gocarI kA samaya jAnakara vahAM AgaI, usako usa ladhu sAdhvI ne usa mahilA sanyAsinI ke bAre meM Thaharane karane kI vyavasthA kA sUcana kiyA, vaha praur3ha zrAvikA prasannatA pUrvaka usa sanyAsinI ko apane ghara legaI aura vahA~ para usake Thaharane kI eka ekAMta sthAna meM vyavasthA kara dI / dUsare dina jaba tapasvIMjI kA vyAkhyAna huA to usameM vaha manyAsino striyoM ke sAtha ekAMta meM Akara baiTha gaI aura ekAgra mana se tapasvI jI kA vyAkhyAna sunatI rhiiN| vyAsyAna ke bAda vaha usa makAna para calI gaI aura kucha bhojana lekara phira 12-1 baje prAkara mere pAsa usI coMtare para Akara baiTha gaI ve donoM sAdhviyA tathA eka do vaisI anya vhaneM bhI vahAM Akara baiTha gaI / hamArA nitya kA jo thAr3A sA svAdhyAya kA krama thA usako cAlU kiyA para usa mahilA ke sanmukha bolane meM mujhe kucha hicakicAhaTa hone lgii| kyoMki usa mahilA kI pahale dina vAlI sArI bAteM sunakara mere manameM eka vicitra prakAra kI khalabalAhaTa hone lagI thI / sArI rAta par3A par3A maiM usa mahilA kI rahasyamayI bAtoM kA asta-vyasta ciMtana karatA rahA / usake jIvana ke viSaya ke kucha vizeSa jAnakArI prApta karane kA bhI mere mana meM kautUhala utpanna huA / usa mahilA kI umra usa samaya prAyaH 35 varSa ke AsapAsa ko hogI / merI umra to usa samaya 20 varSa se bhI kama tho usake anubhava, jJAna aura sAdhanA madya jIvana kI dRSTi se mere meM to kucha bhI nahIM hai aisI laghutA mere mana meM utpanna huI / maiM thAr3I bahuta dharma sambandhI bAteMcIteM kara sakatA hU~ aura kucha thor3e se jaina zAstroM kA mujhe jJAna hai isase mere pAsa Ane vAle zrAvaka bhAI-bahanoM kI dRSTi meM maiM eka acchA pUjyanIya aura vandanIya sAdhu samajhA jA rahA hU~ aura isase loga pAkara jhuka kara mujhe vandana namaskAra kiyA karate haiM / isalie zAyada usa sanyAsinI mahilA ke mana meM bhI mere lie kucha viziSTatA ke bhAva utpanna hue hoM / usa sanyAsinI ne mujha se prathama to jaina sAdhuoM ke viSaya meM jAnakArI karanI cAhI aura isalie vaha isa viSaya ke aneka prazna mujha se pUchane lagI maiMne usako dhore-dhIre sAdhu dharma ke prAcAra kyA haiM ve saMkSepa meM btlaae| phira usane ye Apake gurU kauna haiM, kahA~ ke rahane vAle haiM, itane lambe upavAsa kyoM karate haiM. ye sAdhviyAM kauna hai, ki| taraha inhoMne yaha sAdhu veSa dhAraNa kiyA, inake jIvana kA kyA uddezya hai ? ityAdi aneka prazna jo eka acche vicAraka ke mana meM utpanna hote haiM, vaise prazna usane pUche / maiMne apanI jitanI

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( 74 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA jAnakArI thI usako saMkSepa meM kaha sunaaii| yaha saba bAteM vaha bahuta gambhIra bhAva se sunatI rahatI thI aura usake mukhAkRti ke bhAvoM sa mujhe jJAta hotA thA ki vaha koI gambhIra ciMtana meM par3a jAtI thI / aisA vArtAlApa usake sAtha do-tIna dina taka hotA rahA / phira vaha adhika samaya usa bar3I sAdhvI tathA jisa bahana ne lambe upavAsoM kI tapasvA le rakhI thI, usake pAsa jAkara baiThA karatI aura unase vividha prakAra ke dhArmika bhAva jAnane kI ceSTA karatA rahI / para una tapasyA karane vAloM kI vaisI koI mano bhUmikA nahIM thI jo usa mahilA kI bAtoM ko ThIka samajha sakeM aura ThIka utara de sake / mere pAsa bhI usako kucha vizeSa jAna milane jaisI koI adhyayanAtmaka sAmagrI nahIM thii| tathApi merI jijJAsA vRti ko vaha ThIka samajha sakI thI aura isa dRSTi se mere sAtha baiThakara kucha jIvanopayogI bAteM karatI rahI / usane mere jIvana ke viSaya meM bhI kucha prazna pUche / maiMne saMkSepa meM paramtu jIvana meM pahalI hI bAra aisI vyakti ke sanmukha apane bhAva prakaTa kiye / isameM khAsakara apanI mAtA ke viyoga Adi kA maiMne varNana sunaayaa| ise suna kara usakA hRdaya Ardra - bhAva se bhara uThA aura usane khule mana se kahA ki jaba ApakI mAtA ke prati aisI saMvedanA hai tI use pApa kabhI apane pAsa kyoM nahIM bulAnA cAhate prAdi / taba maiMne kahA ki hamArA sAdhu dharma vaisA karane kI prAjJA nahIM detA taba usane kahA ki isa prakAra kA yaha sAdhu jIvana mujhe kucha vicAra zUnya sA lagatA hai / aApake jIvana kA lakSya koI viziSTa honA cAhiye Apa meM kucha aisI prAMtarika zakti dikhAyI detI hai jo yogya samAgama ke milane para khUba vikasita ho sakatI hai / maiMne usakI ye bAteM bahuta dhyAna pUrvaka sunI aura mere mana meM eka prakAra kA kucha vicitra Andolana hone lgaa| usakI kucha ba teM to mujhe cubha so gaI : ye saba bAteM baiThI-baiThI vaha laghu sAdhvI bhI sunatI rahI para isakA marma usake samajha meM kucha bhI nahIM AyA / parantu usake mana meM mere bAlya jIvana sambandhI bAteM jAnane ko vizeSa jijJAsA ho paaii| do-tIna dina bAda vaha mahilA sanyAsinI vahA~ se pUnA calI gii| mujhe apanA patA de gaI aura kahA ki maiM kabhI Apako patra likhU to mujhe uttara milegA ? taba maiMne kahA ki hama apane sAdhu dharma ke mutAbika kisI ko apane hAthoM se patra nahIM likhate na hama kisI ke Ane jAne kA bhI koI saMdezA bhijavAte hai / vaha sanyAsinI jaba jAne lago tA usa zrAvikA ne usako kharcI kI dRSTi se 5-7 rupaye diye| isa prakAra vArI ke usa cAturmAsa meM ukta zikSaka tathA mahilA sanyAsinI ke samAgama se mere mana meM jina vicAroM kA ajJAta rUpa se bIjAropaNa humA vaha bAda meM jA kara kaise aMkurita

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sthAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ( 75 ) huyA usakA citra Age ke prakaraNa meM milegaa| tasvojI kI lambI tapasyA ke pa ragA ke samaya Asa pAsa ke saikar3oM bhAI-bahana vArI gAMva meM Aye sAdhvI jI kI tapasyA kA pAraNA bhI uso samaya humA tathA usa bahana ke mA sopavAsa kA pAraNA bhI usI samaya sampanna huaa| isalie vaha prasaga isa gAMva ke logoM ke lie adbhuta sA nA / usa tapasvI bahana ke riste dAroM ne usakA phATU lene ke lie eka kemarAmena ko bAhara se bulaayaa| usane usa bahana ke ristedAra Adi kA eka grupa phoTU bhI liyaa| taba una bhAIyoM ko yaha bhI icchA huI ki ve hama tInoM sAdhuoM kA bhI eka phoTU le liyA jAya isake lie tapa:vojo se nivedana kiyA tA prathama to ve sApha inkAra ho gaye / unhone kahA ki sAdhu kA phoTU lenA sAdhu dharma ke virUddha hai, kyoMki isa pha TU ke dhone Adi kriyA meM sacita pAnI kA upayoga hAtA hai isalie yaha sAdhu ke lie pAnAcA ra kA viSya hai| tathApi merI icchA phoTU livAne kI bahuta rahI isase aAgraha karake maiMne tapasvIjI ko manAyA aura hama tonoM sAdhunoM kA eka phoTU usa samaya liyA gyaa| sthAnakavAsI sAdhu jIvana meM merA yaha eka ho phoTU liyA gayA thA aura usakI phoTU kaoNphA jaba taka maiM usa veSa meM rahA taba taka apanA pAthI ke puThe meM sambhAlakara ravI / / kucha dina bAda usa laghu sAdhvI ne kaI daphaha aAgraha kiyA ki maiM apanI mAtA ko bulAnA cAhU~ to usake lie vaha apanI mAtA dvArA kucha vizeSa pranya karAnA cAhato hai / usakI bahuta icchA rahI ki vaha kisI taraha apano A~khoM se merA mAtA ko dekha sake, merI mAtA ke prati usake dila meM apanI mAtA se bhI aki bhAva utpanna ho gayA thA vaha bArambAra mujha se pUchA karatA ki zrApa kyoM nahIM apanI mAtA ko dekhanA cAhate haiM para isakA koI samucita utara mere pAsa se na sunakara vaha mana meM bahuta khina hutrA karatA thii| mujhe lagane lagA ki maiMne apanI mAtA ke bAre meM ina logoM se bAteM kahakara apane hRdaya ko marmAhata banA diyA aura isako koI davA mujhe mila nahIM rahI haiM / vArI gAMva kA vaha caturmAsa mere mana ko kaI prakAra se Andolita karane vAlA rahA / cAturmAsa samApta hote hI hama tInoM sAdhunoM ne vahA~ se vihAra kara diyA aura phira mAlave kI tarapha jAne kI tapasvIjI kI icchA huii| hama punaH eka bAra campAlAlajI se milane ke lie ahamadanagara kI tarapha gae / unase mile aura tapasvojI ne kahA ki bahuta varSoM se prApa idhara hI vicare rahe haiM / so aba mAlave kI tarapha hamAre sAtha padhAreM / sunakara campAlAlajI kA kucha mana ho gayA aura phira hama saba vahA~ se vihAra karate hue vAmborI Adi gAMvoM meM Thaharate hue koI 2-3 mahine bAda manamADa pahU~ce / manamADa se hamArI icchA dhuliyA jAne kI huI para

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( 76 ) campAlAlajI vahIM Thahara gaye / rAste meM munnAlAlajI bhI donoM bApa beTe hamAre sAtha ho lie| hama dhuliyA pahu~ce vahA~ para do sAdhu jo sage bhAI the unase hamArA milanA huaa| unakA nAma to aba mujhe yAda nahIM A rahA hai parantu unakI vahA~ para acchI pratiSThA nahIM thI vahAM ke zrAvakoM ne unake zithIlAcAra ke viSaya meM bahutaso bAteM hameM sunAI - kahane lage ki ye mahArAja roja subaha halavAI kI dukAna se garama garama jalebiyA~ kisI bhAI ke dvArA maMgavAte rahate haiM aisI aura bhI aneka bAteM una bhAIyoM ne hamase kahI / to maiM kautUhala ke vaza unase hiru mila sA gayA thA aura unhoMne mujhe kucha dila kholakara apanI bAteM khii| unake pAsa kA~ca ke viziSTa maNiyoM ko eka do mAlAeM maiMne dekhii| sAdhu loga to aisI kA~ca kI maNiyoM kI mAlAe nahIM rakhate haiN| mujhe unako dekhakara kucha Azcarya sA huaa| kucha samaya bAda hamane sunA ki unhoMne usa sAdhu veSa kA parityAga kara diyA aura mUrtipUjaka sampradAya meM dIkSita ho gae / hama loga dhulIyA se vApasa manamADa nAra vahAM para campAlAlajI ke sAtha kucha dina rahe / tapasvIjI kI icchA aba jaldIra meM jAne kI ho rahI thI unhoMne campAlAlajI se calane ko phira kahA parantu unhoMne apanI anicchA prakaTa ko taba hama loga unheM vahIM chor3a kara Age cale rAste meM bAghalI gAMva mAyA yahA~ ke zrAvakoM kA tyAgraha hone ke kAraNa mahinA bhara vahA~ ThaharanA huA / vAghI meM bhusAvala ke kucha bhAI prAye aura unhoMne grAne vAlA cAturmAsa bhusAvala meM karane kA atyAgraha kiyA yadyapi tapasvAjI ko icchA cAturmAsa ke pahale mAlave meM pahu~ca jAne kI thI parantu bhusAvala vAloM kA atyAgraha dekhakara vahA~ cAturmAsa karane ko sammati pradarzita kI phira vahA~ se vihAra karate hue utarANa, pAMcorA, jalagAMva Adi sthAnoM meM Thaharate hue, caumAle ke najadIka ke dinoM meM bhusAvala pahu~ca gae hamezA ke kramAnusAra tapasvIjI ne vahA~ para 50 dina ko tapasyA kI sadana kI bhA~ti vahA~ bhI saiMkar3oM bhAI bahina darzanArtha prAe / mero jovana prapaMca kathA eka dina eka yuvaka bhAI apane hAtha meM kucha eka do pustakeM lekara mere pAsa Akara baiThA / vaha acchA zikSita sA mAlUma diyaa| kucha do-cAra bAteM karane para maiMne yoM hI pUchA ki yaha pustaka tumhAre hAtha meM kAhe kI hai ? taba usane kahA ki isa pustaka kA nAma satyArtha prakArA hai yaha Arya samAja ke saMsthApaka svAmI dayAnandajI kI banAyo huI hai| maiM amuka nagara meM eka kaoNleja meM ema0 e0 kI par3hAI kara rahA hai vahAM kaoNleja ke chAtrAlaya meM rahatA hU~ / vahA~ kucha Arya samAja ko mAnane vAle eka-do vaise ho mere mitra rahate haiM jo hamezA kucha samAja viSayaka bAtoM kI carcA karate rahate haiN| maiM jaina hone ke nAte mere sAtha ve jaina dharma aura samAja ke bAre meM bhI kucha vicAra viniyama karate rahate haiM aura svAmI dayAnandanI ke batAe hue vaidika siddhAntoM para khUba prAsthA rakhate haiM / unhoMne kucha majAka karate hue jaina dharma ke bAre meM kahA ki jainiyoM ke granthoM meM aisI

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sthAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (77) bebuniyAdI bAteM likhI gaI hai / jo manuSya kI sAmAnya buddhi kI samajha ke bAhara hai / udAharaNa ke taura para jaina dharma meM aisA kahA gayA hai ki purAne jamAne meM manuSya lAkhoM karor3oM varSa kI Ayu vAle hote the tathA unake zarIra kI lambAI UMcAI-itanI hotI thI ki jo hajAroM phUToM se nApane lAyaka hotI thii| isI taraha kI jaina dharma kI kaI vicitra bAteM svAmI dayAnandajI ne apane satyArtha prakAza nAmaka pustaka meM likhI haiM aura mujhe unhoMne usa pustaka ke par3hane kA Agraha kiyA / vahI pustaka yaha mere hAthoM meM hai| maiM isako kucha bAtoM kA khulAsA mApase jAnanA cAhatA huuN| ityAdi kucha bAteM usa bhAI ne kahIM jo mere lie sarvathA ajJAta thii| apanI ajJAnatA ko chipAne kI dRSTi se, maiMne usa bhAI se kahA ki tuma isa pustaka ko mere pAsa rakha jAno maiM isakA dhyAna se avalokana karanA cAhatA hU~ aura usakA khulAsA socanA cAhatA huuN| yaha sunakara usa bhAI ne vaha pustaka mere pAsa rakha dI aura namaskAra Adi karake calA gyaa| phira maiMne dhIre-dhIre usa pustaka ko par3hanA prArambha kiyA / usake prArambha ke kucha prakaraNoM kI bAteM to merI samajha ke bAhara thI, para usameM jaina dharma ke vicAroM para AkSepa karane vAlI jo bAteM likhI thI unako maiMne bahuta dhyAna pUrvaka kaI bAra par3hI / unake par3hane se mujhe jJAta huA ki svAmIdayAnandajI ne, jaina zAstro meM vaNita kAla cakra ke svarUpa se sambandha rakhane vAlI ye bAteM likhI haiM / jaina granthoM meM varNana hai ki vartamAna avasarpiNI kAla ke bIte hue tIsare-cauthe bhAre meM jo pazu-manuSya Adi prANI utsanna hote the unako Ayu lAkhoM karor3oM varSoM jitanI laMbI hotI thI tathA zarIra bhI usI pramANa meM saiMkar3oM hajAroM dhanuSya pramANa bar3e hote the| isI taraha jisa pRthvI para hama rahate haiM usakA svarUpa bhI aisA varNita hai jo Aja ke yuga ko vAstavikatA se sarvathA vicitra aura kapola kalpanA prasUta mAlUma detA hai / prAcIna itihAsa ke jAnane kI taraha mero jijJAsA bhUgola viSayaka bAtoM ke jAnane kI bhI vaisI hI rhii| jambudvIpa ke varNana svarUpa jo thaukar3e maiMne par3he the| unameM merI khAsa rUci rahatI thI / jambudvIpa aura dhAtakI khaNDa Adi r3hAI dvIpa kA svarUpa batAne vAle jo nakze mujhe mile maiM unako sambhAlakara apane par3hane ke puThTha meM rakhA karatA thA aura bArambAra unheM dekhA karatA thaa| una nakzoM meM bharata kSetra, airAvata kSetra tathA mahAvideha kSetra ke rekhA citra diye gaye the / tathA merU parvata, himavAna prarvata, baitAhya parvata Adi bar3e parvatoM kI sthitI bhI unameM Alekhita kI huI thii| tathA ye kSetra aura parvata kitane lambe-caur3e aura U~ce haiM inakA mApa bhI yojanoM kI ginatI meM likhA huA thaa| kisa taraha hamAre isa bharata kSetra meM dina aura rAta hote rahate haiM unako parigaNanA bhI batAI gaI thii| khaNDA joyaNa nAma kA eka bar3A sA thokar3A maine ThIkara abhyasta kara liyA thA aura

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(78 ) mero jovana prapaMca kathA usake sahAre jambu dvIpa Adi r3hAI dvIpa ke nakzoM kA maiM avalokana kiyA karatA thaa| jina dinoM usa bhAI ne ukta satyArtha prakAza nAmaka pustaka mujhe lAkara do unhIM dinoM meM ukta prakAra se una nakzoM Adi kA avalokana kara rahA thA / merI zRddhA usa viSaya meM dRr3ha mUla thI / maiM mAnatA thA ki jaina zAstroM meM vagita ye saba bAteM sarvathA satya haiM unameM zaMkA utpanna hone jaisI koI bAta nahIM hai parantu duniyA~ ke ora loga ina bAtoM ko kisa taraha mAnate haiM aura samajhate haiM---isakA mujhe koI jJAna nahIM thA na maiMne aba taka aisI koI pustakeM hI dekhI thI aura na isa bhaviSya kI carcA karane vAle koI bhAI se hI merA vaisA paricaya huA thA / svAmI dayAnandajI kA mujhe koI vizeSa paricaya jJAta nahIM huA thaa| maiM itanA jAna sakA thA ki ve Arya samAja nAmaka eka dharma sampradAya ke saMsthApaka the| aura ve kaI rAjapUta rAjAoM ke bahuta pUjyanIya the / mere svargIya pitA ne bhI unase yajJo pavita dhAraNa kiyA thA jisakA varNana maiMne apanI prakAzita jIvana kathA meM kucha diyA hai / isalie mere mana meM svAmIjI meM prati antara meM koI sadbhAva chipA huA thA / parantu jaba maiMne isa taraha satyArtha prakAza par3hA aura usameM likhe gaye jaina dharma viSayaka AkSepAtmaka vicAra par3hane meM Aye to mere mana meM kucha aura hI prakAra ke bhAva utpanna hone lage / mere mana meM lagA ki jinako jaina zAstroM meM mithyA dRSTi kahA hai ve aise hI loga hote haiM / jaina dharma pratipAdita siddhAntoM ko viparita dRSTi se dekhane kA nAma mithyA dRSTi hai| merI mAnyatA thI ki jaina zAstroM meM jo kucha likhA gayA hai vaha sarvathA satya hai aura vaha saba sarvajJa bhagavAna kA kahA huaA hai isalie usameM zaMkA utpanna honA bho mithyA dRSTi ke udaya kA prabhAva hai ityAdi / do-tIna dina bAda jaba vaha yuvaka punaH mere pAsa AyA aura ukta viSaya meM kucha carcA karanI cAho taba maiMne usase uparyukta bAteM kahI parantu vaha to ema0 e0 jaiso zikSA prApta yuvaka thA usane vijJAna, itihAsa, bhUgola, gaNita Adi aneka viSayoM ko acchI zikSA prApta kI thii| mujhe una viSayoM kA kiMcita bhI jJAna nahIM thaa| vaha yuvaka adhyayanazIla thA, dharma aura samAja viSayaka aneka pustakeM usane par3hI thii| merI ukta bAteM sunakara vaha kucha haMsane sA lagA usane kahA ki mahArAja Apa dharma gurUtroM ko deza aura dharma kI vAstavikatA kA bahata kama paricaya hotA hai| hama loga jo naI zikSA prApta karate haiM aura usake dvArA jina viSayoM aura vicAroM kA hameM parijJAna prApta hotA hai usake kAraNa aba jo zikSita samAja utpanna ho rahA hai usako hamAre zAstroM meM likho gaI aisI vebuniyAdI bAtoM para kiMcIta bhI zRddhA nahIM hotI Aja kI skUloM meM cauthI-pA~cavIM-chachI kitAbeM par3hane vAlA lar3akA bhI yaha nizcita rUpa se jAna sakatA hai ki hamArI yaha pRthvI kitanI lambI, caur3I, aura kisa AkAra prakAra kI hai| hamAre yahAM jo dina aura rAta hote haiN| unakA kyA kAraNa hai / ye candraH aura

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA movanAnubhava ( 76 ) sUrya jo hameM dikhAI de rahai ve kyA hai, tathA AkAza meM jo ye asaMkhya tAre dikhAI dete haiM ve kyA hai ? unakI gati, sthiti Adi kyA hai ? ityAdi bhUgola sambandhI jo bar3I-bar3I bAteM haiM, vaha pratyeka skUlI vidyArthI jAna sakatA hai / unake sAmane Apa loga jo jambudvopa, DhAIdvIpa Adi kI bAteM karate haiM ve kevala kapola kalpanA jaisI hI lagatI hai| svAmI dayAnandajoM ne inhIM bAtoM ko lakSya kara isa satyArtha prakAza meM jaina dharma viSayaka kucha vicAra likheM haiN| Apa logoM ko cAhiye ki inakA gaharA adhyayana kareM aura inakA koI samucita uttara denA jaisA lage vaha deN| mere pitA jaina dharma ke kucha acche jAnakAra haiM aura unake sAtha maiM aisI carcA kabhI kabho kiyA karatA huuN| maiMne apane pitAjI se sunA ki Apa jaina zAstroM kA ThIka-Thoka adhyayana kara rahe hai aura sAtha meM marAThI bhASA ke sAhitya kA bhI kucha paricaya prApta kara rahe haiM / isalie Apake pAsa ye bAteM maiMne kaho haiM / pAra sAdhu loga to aisI bAteM sunAnA bhI nahIM cAhate / yaha sunakara maiMne usase kahA ki bhAI tumhArI yaha bAte mujhe bahuta acchI lagI hai aura merI jijJAsA bhI aise viSayoM kA vizeSa jJAna prApta karane kI rahA karatI haiM paraMtu hama sAdhuoM kA jo prAcAra vicAra hai usake kAraNA maiM apanI jijJAsA ko tRpta nahIM kara sakatA / ityAdi bAteM usa yuvaka se do-cAra dina khulle mana se hotI rahI aura jisa prakAra vArI meM usa zikSita ajJAta mAsTara ke samAgama se mujhe kucha apane adhyayana kA koI nayA prAbhAsa dikhAI diyA isI taraha isa jaina zikSita yuvaka ke sAtha vArtAlApa karane se jaina zAstroM kA adhyayana kisa dRSTi se karanA cAhiye isakA bhI mujhe kucha nUtana pratimAsa hone lagA / aba Ane vAle varSa meM ina kucha sune sunAye asta vyasta vicAroM ne kaisA rupa dhAraNa kiyA, isakA kucha paricaya Age diyA jA rahA haiN| bhusAvala se mAlave kI tarapha prayANa bhusAvala kA cAturmAsa samApta hone para hamane indaura kI tarapha jAne kA vicAra kiyA, rAste meM bahanipura, khaNDavA Adi sthAnoM meM hote hue koI mahine bAda hama apane uso paricita indaura zahara meM phuuNce| vahAM para sunA ki agale do eka mahinoM meM ratalAma zahara meM sthAnaka vAsI jaina sampradAya kI eka bahuta bar3I kAnpha sa ( sabhA ) ho rahI hai usameM aneka sAdhu-sAdhviyoM kA samudAya upasthita hone vAlA hai / hama logoM kI icchA vahAM jAne ko huI ataH hama vahAM se vihAra karate hue badanAvara - bar3anagara Adi kaI sthAnoM meM ghUmate hue ratalAma pahU~ce / jaisA ki upara sUcita kiyA hai ratalAma meM hamAre dharmadAsajI ke sampradAya kA jo dharma

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(8. ) merI jIvana prapaMca kathA sthAnaka thA usameM jAkara hama ThahareM / isI sampradAya ke nandalAlajI Adi sAdhu bhI vahAM para the / zahara meM hukmIcandajI ke sampradAya ke pujya zrIlAlajI tathA javAharalAlajI aura cothamalajI Adi sAdhuao kA bhI acchA samudAya thA / kucha aura bhI mAravAr3I sampradAya ke sAdhu vahAM para Aye e the / nIyata samaya para kronphesa kA samAroha honA zuru huA / hajAroM jaina bhAI-bahana vahAM ikaThe hue the / khAsakara ke kAThiyAvAr3a ke kucha prasiddha jaina bhAI usameM adhika utsAha dikhA rahe the / kAThiyAvAr3a nivAsI bhAiyoM kI preraNA se morabI aura zAyada rAjakoTa ke rAjA bhI usa konphrensa meM upasthita hone vAle the, isalie ratalAma ke mahArAjA ne bhI usa samAroha ke lie acchA sahayoga diyA / udghATana ke samaya hama sAdhu jano ko bho vahAM upasthita hone kA Agraha pUrvaka prAmaMtraNa diyA gayA aura Agata zrAvaka samuha ko kucha mAMgalika rupa dharmopadeza dene kI vyavasthA kI gaI thii| zAyada jaina sthAnaka vAlI sampradAya kI yaha sabase pahalI konphrensa thI aura isake lie kAphI pracAra kiyA gayA thA / zahara ke bAhara bahuta bar3A pANDAla banAyA gayA thA aura Ane vAle athitiyoM ke lie vahAM Thaharane kI bhI bar3I vizAla vyavasthA kI gaI thI koI tIna dina kA vaha sammelana thA / hama sAdhu loga bhI sammelana prArambha hone ke 2 ghaNTe pahale vahAM pAMDAla meM jAkara eka tarapha baiThA karate the / sAdhupro ke baiThane ke lie bilkula alaga vyavasthA kI gaI thIM / viziSTa athitiyo ke lie tathA konphrensa ke agragaNya kArya kartAmoM ke lie alaga bar3A sA suzobhita maMca banAyA gayA thA / hama loga pahale ho jA kara apane "poTha" para baiTha jAte the zrAvaka loga khar3e hokara svAgata karate the / sAdhuoM ke alaga - alaga samudAya ke lie alaga - alaga paTTa rakha diye gaye the / unapara hama yathA sthAna prAsana lagAkara baiTha jAte the prAraMbha ke samaya jaba moravI ke rAjA Adi viziSTa atithi Aye to unakA zrAvakoM ne bhavya svAgata kiyA / unhone hama sAghuoM kI tarapha bhI hAtha jor3akara namaskAra kiyA / usa jamAne meM jaina samAja kI dRSTi se yaha eka adbhuta mA dRzya thA / sabhA kA prAraMbha hone para pahale pujya zrIlAlajI ne maMgalA caraNa sunAyA / kucha thor3A sA dharmopadeza javAharalAlajo ne bhI sunAyA / phira unhIM ke ziSya cauthamala jI nAmaka sAdhu ne khar3e hokara koI prAdhA ghanTe taka vyAkhyAna diyA cauthamala jI eka acche vyAkhyAnika kahe jAte the / unakI AvAja bahuta bulaMda thI aura ve aksara urdU bhASA ko majale gA2 kara una para pravacana karate rahate the /

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (81) upasthita logoM ne unakA vyAkhyAna dhyAnapUrvaka sunaa| phira konphensa kI kAryavAhI zurU huI aura niyamAnusAra bhASaNa prAdi hote rahe Agata atithi vizeSa morabI nareza kA bhI bahuta sammAna kiyA gyaa| jisake pratyutara meM unhone bhI kucha aAbhAra pradarzita bAteM khii| usa samaya lAuDaspIkara nahIM the jisase sabhA meM kolAhala ke kAraNa logoM ko kucha kama ho sunAI detA thaa| hama sAvu loga samaya hone para vahAM se uThakara apane-apane dharma sthAnoM meM pahu~ca gye| konmansa kI kAryavAhI dopahara ke bAda zurU hoto thI aura subaha ke samaya ghaNTA-DeDa ghaNTA sAdhuoM ke vyAkhyAna unake dharma sthAnakoM meM hote the| dUsare dina dopahara ko pahale dina kI taraha hI sAdhu loga sabhA ke pANDAla meM pahu~ca gaye the / isa dina ziSTAcAra ke khayAla se zrAvakoM ne hamAre sampradAya ke sAdhuoM ko dharmopadeza ke lie vinatI ko tadnusAra nandalAlajo svAmI jo hamAre sampradAya meM mukhiyA the tathA vyAkhyAna kI dRSTi se ve jarA adhika nipuNa samajhe jAte the / isalie unakA Adha-poNa ghaNTe taka vyAkhyAna hotA rahA para upasthita samudAya ne cauthamalajI ko punaH vyAkhyAna dene kA anurodha kiyA kyoMki pahale dina unhoMne apanI bulanda AvAja se gajalaM Adi gAkara zrotAoM kA mana AkarSita kara liyA thA / cauthamalajI ke bAda kucha bhAIyoM ne jo hamAre dharmasthAnaka ke anurAgI the unhoMne hamAre sampradAya kI eka sAdhvI jo cauthamala jI kI taraha ho gajaleM Adi gAne meM tathA para kucha pravanana karane meM nipuNa sI ho gaI thI usako bhI dharmoM padeza-dene ke lie Agraha kiyA gayA / nandalAla jI svAmI ko AjJA pAkara bahuta sakoca ke sAtha usa sAdhvI ne thor3A sA prastAvanA rUpa pravacana kara usake samamana meM eka do gajaleM gAkara sunAI usa sAdhvI kA kaMTha itanA madhura tathA sUrIlA thA aura usake gAne ko kalA bhI itano AkarSaka thI jisase sunakara cauthamalajI ke vyAkhyAna se bhI adhika sAro sabhA lIna jaisI ho gaI thii| phira jaba sabhA kI kAryavAhI zurU huI to hama saba sAdhu loga apane dharma sthAnoM meM vApasa cale paaye| tIsare dina subaha hamAre dharma sthAnaka meM jaba vyAkhyAna zurU huA to logoM kI atyadhika ThaTha jamI aura una zrotAoM ne ukta sAdhvI jI se aura adhika gajaleM prAdi ga.ne kI vinatI kI aura usane kaI aneka upadezAtmaka gajaleM gAkara zrotAoM ke mana ko khUba raMjIta kiyA / usa dina phira hama sAdhu loga ukta sabhA kA kAryavAhI meM sammilita hone ke lie nahIM ge| do-tIna dina meM konphensa kA vaha melA samApta ho gayA aura hama sAdhu logoM ne bhI anyatra vihAra karane kA vicAra kiyaa|

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mero jIvana prapaMca kathA ratalAma meM jitane dina hama rahe nandalAlajI svAmIjI ke merI hI samAna umra vAle tathA merI hI nAma rAzI cAle choTe sAdhu kisanalAlajI ke sAtha merA adhika sakhya bhAva ho gayA / hama donoM eka sAtha baiThate aura apane adhyayana prAdi ko bAteM vicArA krte| maiM tIna varSa dakSiNa meM paribhramaNa kara AyA thA isase vahA~ ke kucha apane anubhava maiMne sunAe / maiMne unase kahA ki hama logoM ko apanA jJAna bar3hAne ke lie koI vizeSa sthAna meM rahanA cAhiye aura kisI prakAra apane sUtroM kA gaharA adhyayana karane kA prayatna karanA cAhiye ityAdi, kaI bAteM unase huA karato / dakSiNa meM rahate hue maine marAThI bhASA kA jo paricaya prApta kiyA tathA usakI kucha itihAsa Adi kI pustakeM par3hI usakA bhI kucha jikra unase kiyA para mujhe mAlUma huA ki unakI ina bAtoM meM koI jijJAsA nahIM thii| unakA lakSya to thA ki kisa taraha DhAla, caupAI, gajaleM Adi gA kara sunane vAle logoM ko mana AkarSita kiyA jAya unakA kaTha bhI kucha acchA thA aura ye cothamalajI kI taraha vyAkhyAna kalA meM nipuNatA prApta karane kI icchA rakhA karate the| Ane vAlA cAturmAsa tapasvIjI ne ujjaina meM karane kA vicAra kiyA / idhara nandalAlajI bho bahuta varSoM se ujjaina kI tarapha nahIM vicare the isalie ujjaina hokara mAlave meM agara aAdi gAMvoM ko tarapha vicarane kA huA / kucha dinoM taka hama donoM hI samudAyoM ne eka sAtha vicaraNa kiyA / .. nandalAlajI ke sAtha: 3-4 sAdhu-the unameM eka to eka varSa kI umra kA nava dokSita sAdhu thA jo pahale mUrtipUjaka sampradAya meM dIkSita huaA thaa| usane mAravAr3a meM tristuto sampradAya (jisako loga sAmAnya rUpa se tAma thuI vAloM kA sampradAya va hA karate haiM / ) ke eka vidvAn sAvu ke pAsa se dakSA lI thii| isa trIstutIya sampradAya ke saMsthApaka rAjendra sUri nAma ke eka bahuta acche vidvAn sAdhu the / ve saMskRta aura prAkRta bhASA ke bar3e vidvAn the / 'abhI dhAnarAjendra, nAma kA prAkRta bhASA kA bahuta bar3A koSa grantha unhoMne kaI varSoM ke parizramapUrvaka bnaayaa| unakI AmnAya vAle mAlave meM jAvarA, ratalAma Adi nagaroM meM bhI kaI anurAgI bhAI the / stalAma meM hI ukta koSa ke chapavAne kA kAryAlaya thaa| parantu ratalAma meM rahate hue hameM usakA kucha bhI jJAna nahIM humaaH| jisa sAdhu ne nandalAla jI ke pAsa trIstutoya sampradAya kA bheSa chor3a. kara sthAnakavAsI sampradAya kA bheSa dhAraNa kara liyA thaa| vaha kisI lar3AI jhagar3e ke kAraNa ho ukta sampradAya chor3akara isa. sampradAya meM dIkSita ho gayA thA / para usakA mana isa nUtana sampradAya meM laga nahIM rahA thaa| isa sampradAya ke prAcAra-vicAra use kaThina se laga rahe the| usake kucha vicAroM se mujhe lagA ki vaha zAyada thor3e ho dina meM isa bheSa ko chor3akara cale jAne kI koI bAta mana meM soca rahA hai| yoM vaha mere pAsa khulle dila se kucha bAteM karane lagA usako

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava (83) merI bAtoM se lagA ki maiM kucha vizeSa adhyayana karane kI icchA rakhatA huuN| para vaha kaise aura kahA~ kiyA jAya isakA mujhe koI khayAla nahIM thA / vaha 3-4 varSa mUrtipUjaka sampradAya meM rahA aura usa sampradAya kI prathAnusAra usane jIva vicAra, navatatva Adi prAkRta prakaraNa kaMThastha kiye the / usa sampradAya meM pracalita zramaNa sUtra arthAt sAdhu pratikramaNa sUtra kA bhA pUrA pATha kaMstha kiyA thA aura phira saMskRta bhASA ke adhyayana ko dRSTi se sArasvata vyAkaraNa kA bhI kitanAka bhAga sikha liyA thA / jina sAdhuoM ke pAsa umane vaha dIkSA lI thI ve usa sampradAya meM eka bahuta acche vidvAna mAne jAte the, aura ve ukta rAjendra sUri ke eka viziSTa ziSyoM meM se the, unhoMne kucha pustakeM bhI likhI, chapavAI thii| usa sampradAya ko kucha jAnakArI prApta karane kI dRSTi se maiMne usake sAtha kucha vizeSa sakhya bhAva dhAraNa kiyaa| usakA nAma usa samaya raMgalAla thA aura jisa saMpradAya kA chor3akara vaha pAyA thA usa sampradAya kA usakA dIkSita nAma raMgavijaya thaa| maiM mUrtipUjaka sampradAya ke prAcAra vyavahAra ke bAre meM kucha bhI nahIM jAnatA thA / unakA bheSa kaisA hotA hai yaha sarva prathama cAlIsa gAMva meM ukta sAdhu ko dekhA taba mujhe kucha AbhAsa hA itanA maiM jarUra jAnatA thA ki mUrtipUjaka sAdhu mandiroM meM jAte haiM aura tIrthakaroM kI murtiyoM ko namaskAra prA|da karate rahate haiM, yati saMsarga ke kAraNa mujhe jaina mandira tayA tIrthakaroM ko mUrti aura unakI pUjA aAdi karane kA mujhe ThIka paricaya thaa| para usa sAdhu dharma ke bAre meM koI vizeSa jJAna nahIM thA / raMgalAla se maiMne dhIre-dhIre yaha saba bAteM jAnane kA prayAsa kiyA / sthAnakavAsI sampradAya meM ThIka ThIka saMskRta bhASA jAnane vAlA koI sAdhu maiMne nahIM dekhA manA / ratalAma meM prathama bAra usa konphensa meM jo choTe - bar3e 40-50 sAdhu ikaThU hae the. unameM koI bhI saMskRta kA vidvAna nahIM dekhA / jaina AgamoM ke prarthoM kA acchA jJAna rakhane vAle to kaI sAdhu jAnane meM pAe paraMtu ve saba bhASA meM likhe gae sUtroM ke TavArtha par3ha-par3ha kara hI unakA jJAna rakhate the / aura bola-cAla kI bhASA meM kucha purAne sAdhuoM ne jo prakaraNAtmaka thokar3e banA rakhe the unake dvArA jJAna prApta karate rahate the / maiMne jaba yaha sunA ki bUrtipUjaka sAdhu saMskRta ke bar3e vidvAna hote haiM aura sUtroM para purAne prAcAryoM kI banAI huI saMskRta TikAe par3hate rahate hai tathA jIva vicAra navatatva, kSetra samAsa, saMgraNI sUtra karma grantha mAdi aneka prakaraNa graMtha jo prAkRta bhASA meM bane hue haiM unakA bhI acchA acchA adhyayana ve karate rahate hai /

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/ 84 ) mero jovana prapaMca kathA ___ isalie maiMne raMgalAla se pUchA ki mUrtipUjaka sAdhu aisI vidyA adhyayana kahA~ aura kaise karate rahate haiM ? taba usane kahA ki mUrtipUjaka kaI sAdhu svayaM acche vidvAna hote haiM isase ve apane ziSyoM ko svaya par3hAte rahate haiM tathA vyAkaraNa, kAvya, koSa nyAya Adi ke saMskRta bhASA ke granthoM kA adhyayana karAne ke lie acche brAhmaNa paMDita bhI unake pAsa rahate haiM, jinake kharce kI vyavasthA zrAvaka loga karate haiM / jahA~ para ve sAdhu cAturmAsa karate haiM vahA~ para aise sAhmaNa paDitoM ko kAzI Adi sthAnoM se bulAyA jAtA hai aura ve sAdhuoM ko vyAkaraNa prAdi viSayoM ke grantha par3hAte rahate haiM / ragalAla ne kahA ki mere gurU ke jo bar3e gurU rAjendra sUri the unake pAsa aise do-cAra brAhmaNa paDita hamezA rahA karate the| unhoMne jo bahuta bar3A jaina grAgamoM kA koSa anya banAyA hai usake vanAne, likhane, chapavAne Adi ke kAma meM bhI ye paMDita loga madada karate rahe haiN| maiMne bhI aise hI eka paDita se saMskRta vyAkaraNa sokhanA zurU kiyA thaa| usane batAyA ki hamAre sampradAya ke to 5-7 sAdhu ho aise acche vidvAna haiM parantu gujarAta meM jo aura sampradAya ke aise mUrtipUjaka sAdhu haiM unameM kaI bahuta bar3e2 vidvAna haiM / hamAre sampradAya ke zrAvakoM ne do varSa pahale mAravAr3a ke eka gAMva se samujaya ko yAtrA ke lie saMgha nikAlA jisameM saiMkar3oM bhAI bahina sammilita hue aora hamAre sampradAya ke 15-20 sAdhu aura kucha sAdhdhiyA~ bhI usameM sAtha the / hama loga prAvu, tAraMgA, pAlanapura, pATana, saMkhepara Adi sthAnoM kI yAtrA karate hue ahamadAbAda, bhAvanagara, grAdi zaharoM meM hokara pAlotAnA nagara meM pahuMce the, vahA~ para gujarAta se bhI aise do-tIna saMgha Aye, unameM vaisa ho kaI sAdhusAdhvI the / hamane yAtrA ke samaya pATana, ahamadAbAda, bhAvanagara Adi zaharoM meM bahuta bar3e-bar3e upAzraya dekhe aura vahA~ para rahane vAle aneka sAdhu-sAdhvI bhI dekhane ko mileM / raMgalAla kI aisI aneka bAteM sunakara mere mana meM isase ukta mUrtipUjaka sampradAya kI kucha vizepa ba teM jAnane ko bhI jijJASA bar3hI kyoMki merA usa sampradAya viSayaka jJAna bahuta hI alpa thA aura raMgalAla ukta rUpa meM usa sampradAya ko sArI bAteM acchI taraha se jAnane vAlA mAlUma par3A / vahIM kucha buddhimAna thA aura mAravAr3a, gujarAta, mAlavA Adi kaI sthAnoM meM raha cukA thA jahA~ usako kaI prakAra ke zrAvaka bhAIyoM kA paricaya prAta huaA thA / kucha akhabAra tathA patra-patrikAeM bhI patA rahatA thaa| gujarAtI bhASA bhI vaha TIka-ThIka samajhatA thaa| isa dRSTi se mujhe lagA ki merI apekSA vaha kucha adhika jAnane va lA hai| para vaha svabhAva kA bar3A te jasA

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sthAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava ( 85 ) thaa| kaI daphA vaha apane sAdhuoM ke sAtha lar3ane lagatA thA, jise dekhakara mujhe usase kucha saMkoca bhI huA karatA thA / ___ isa prakAra koI DeDha mahinA hamArA aura usakA sAtha rahA para usako bAtoM ne mere mana ko apane cAlu jIvana krama meM eka bar3A kSobha utpanna kara diyA aura mere vicAra kisI aura hI rAste kI aura mur3ane lge| mujhe lagA ki isa samudAya meM raha kara maiM apano vidyA kI bhUkha ko nahIM miTA sktaa| mujhe apanA jJAna bar3hAne ko yahAM koI gunjAIza nahIM mAlUma deto / mujhe bAra-bAra apane gurU yati devIhaMsajI kA vaha antima vAkya yAda a.ne lgaa| jisameM unhoMne kahA thA ki "baccA tU khUba vidyA par3hane kA prayatna karanA aura jahA~ vidyA par3hane kA sthAna mile vahAM para rahanA vidyA par3hane hI se terA janma saphala hogA, ityAdi / " maine aisI hI kucha vidyA par3hane ke lie khAkhI bAbA kA sAtha kiyA vahAM kucha na milane se phira bhaTakate phirate yaha skavAsI sAdhu veSa dhAraNa kiyaa| para yahAM para bhI merI kucha viziSTa vidyA sokhane kI koI prAzA saphala nahIM huI / pichale 4-5 varSoM meM jo kucha meM yahAM sIkha pAyA, jAna. sakA usane merI pratara kI jijJAsA ko tRpta karane kA koI mArga dikha nahIM rahA hai| isa samudAya kI prathA aura rUr3hI ke anusAra maiM thor3A bahuta jaina sUtroM kA dhore-dhIre adhyayana bar3hA sakatA hU~ aura DhAla, caupAI, rAsa Adi par3ha-par3ha kara logoM ko vyAkhyAna sunAtA rahU~gA / sAtha meM kucha kayA kahAniyAM yAda kara logo ko sunAte rahane se sunane vAloM kA kucha manoraMjana bhI kara sakU gA, para isase itihAsa aura bhUgola Adi kI jo bAteM maiM khAsakara jAnanA cAhatA hU~ unake jAnane pahane kA yahA~ koI saMyoga hI nahIM dikhAI detA / yahAM to kevala tapasyA aura zuSka kaThora prAcAra kA pAlana ho jIvana kA mukhya lakSya hai aura usake dvArA mAnane vAle bhaktajanoM ke vandana namana Adi avi- : cAra pradarzita sanmAna kI prApti dekhakara hI jIvana ko saphalatA mAna lenI hai| galAla ke svalpa saMsarga ne mere mana ko apane lakSya se vicalita kara diyA / mere mana meM ajJAta bhAva se aisA saMskAra jamane lagA ki kyoM na maiM mUrtipUjaka sAdhu banakara apano vidyA kI bhUkha miTAne kA vicAra karU ? hama sAdhunoM kA ujjaina meM cAturmAsa karane kA vicAra ho cuA thA isalie khAcare da grAdi kucha gAMvoM meM ghUmate phirate cAturmAsa ke kucha dina pahale jaina ke usa luNamaNDI vAle dharma sthAnaka maiM pahuMca gae idhara nandalAlajI svAmI bhI apane ziSyoM ke sAtha Agara Adi sthAnoM meM hote hue ve bhI ujjaina ke nayApurA nAmaka sthAna ke zrAvakoM ke Agraha se vahAM para cAturmAsa ke lie

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merI jIvana prapaMca kapA A gae para ujjaina pahu~cane ke pahale hI rAste meM vaha raMgalAla to kucha lar3a-jhagar3a kara bheSa chor3akara calA gayA / ujjaina kA cAturmAsa aura mere usa veSa kA visarjana cAturmAsa kA prArambha hone para tapasvIjI ne 50 dina ke upavAsa jaiso tapasyA svIkAra kii| unakI khyAtI usI rUpa meM vizeSa thii| jahA~ kahIM ve cAturmAsa rahate vahAM ke zrAvaka unakI vaisI lambI tapasyA kI AzA hamezA rakhate / para isa bAra ujjaina ke zrAvakoM kA vaisA utsAha nahIM dikhAI diyA aura unhoMne vaisI tapasyA viSayaka AmantraNa patrikAeM bhI nahIM chpvaaii| udhara nayApurA meM bhI nandalAlajI ke sAtha vAle eka sAdhu ne koI 45 yA 50 dina ke upavAsa kA paccakakhANa le lIyA thA isalie bAhara vAle zrAvakoM kA AvAgamana bhI bahuta joradAra nahIM rahA / unakI tapasyA kA yahI uddezya rahatA thA ki tapasyA ke nimitta loga unake darzanArtha adhika pAve jAveM / yo to aisI tapasyA karane vAloM kA aura koI UMcA uddezya maiMre anubhava meM nahIM paayaa| jo sAdhu -sAdhvI athavA bahineM aisI laMbI tapasyA karate rahate hai / una saba kA lakSya prAyaH prasiddho aura jana sammAna prApta karane kA hI dikhane meM AyA hai / karmoM kI nirjarA ho, aisA zuddha bhAva rakha kara laMbI tapasyA karane vAlA zAyada hI koI vyakti mAluma deM / jyoM jyoM meM kucha sonane kI zakti prApta karatA gayA aura mujhe kucha apane jovana ke lakSya ke bAre meM bhI kabhI koI vicAra maMtara meM uThane lagA tyoM tyoM mere mana meM tapasvI jI ko aiso labo tapasyA ke bAre meM koI vizeSa zraddhA nahIM rahane lagI / para unakA sneha bhAva mujha para sabase adhika rahatA thA / ve mujha se bhaviSya meM kisI vizeSa prakAra kI yogyatA kI prAzA rakhate the / ve mujhe do - tIna varSa meM apane samudAya kA pUjya banAnA soca rahe the / isa prakAra ko koI koI bAta ve apane bhakta janoM ke Age kiyA bhI karate the / vAro meM jaba hamArA cAturmAsa thA / ora vahAM para jo sAdhviyAM Adi thIM tava aisI bAna aksara nikalA karatI thI / bAda meM jaba campAlAla jI ke sAtha vicaraNa huA aura unako mAlave kI tarapha vicarane kA tapasvojI ne Agraha kiyA taba bhI unake mana meM aisI hI koI bAta thI / ve socate the ki guru rAmaratanajI ke ziSyoM meM koI abhI aisA saMyoga upasthita nahIM huprA / parantu hamAre isa samudAya ke 5 . 10 sAdhu aura 10.15

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava sAdhviyAM hai taba kizanalAla jaise ko usa pada ke lie taiyAra karanA cAhiye unakI bhAvanA ke yogya mujha meM kucha bhI nahIM thA / aisA merA aMtara kahA bArI ke cAturmAsa ke bAda hI ukta mAsTara tathA sanyAsinI ke samAgama se merA mana kucha aura hI dizA meM gati karane laga gayA thA aura vaha dhIre dhIre usa dizA meM bar3hane laga gayA thA / bhusAvala meM ukta jaina navayuvaka ke sAtha satyArtha prakAza ke sambandha se lekara jo bAteM huI una ne bhI mere mana kI gati ko koI nayA dizA saMketa diyA / usake pariNAma svarupa maiM apane vidyA adhyayana ke bAre meM kisI naye mArga kI khoja vyagra rahane lagA. raMgalAya ke sAtha bhI bAtoM se mujhe usa mArga kA AbhAsa hone lagA / ityAdi / parantu karatA thA / yoM sUya pATha bhI maiM barAvara ujjaina vAle usa dhama sthAnaka meM jaisA ki pahale sUcita kiyA huA haiM kucha pustakoM kA purAnA saMgraha thA eka bakse meM hastalikhita pothiyoM ke 5-7 vesTa aura eka dUsare lakar3I ke bakse meM 10-20 chapI huI pustakeM thI una pustakoM ko maiM dhIre dhIre dekhane lagA / usameM chapA huA eka bar3A graMtha mere dene meM AyA jisakA nAma sUyagaDAMga sUtra thA gaDAMga sUtra kA prathama zruta skaMtra maiMne kaMThastha kara rakhA thA aura usakA karatA rahatA thA paraMtu maiMne jisa hAtha ko likhI pustaka (pothI) para se vaha soMkhA yA vaha tau kucha thor3e se pannoM kI thI usameM sUtra ke mUla pATha ke sAtha bhASA kA bArtha bhI likhA huA thA yaha jo chapI huI bar3I pustaka maiMne sarva prathama dekhI vaha to bahuta bar3A graMtha sA thA ! usameM sUtra ke mUla pATha ke sAtha saMskRta bhASA meM likhI huI eka do bar3I TIkAeM thIM aura sAtha meM sUtra kA artha bhI bhASA meM bahuta vistAra ke sAtha diyA huA thA / saMskRta TIkAeM to merI samajha ke bAhara thI parantu usa bhAvArtha ko maiM khUba dhyAna se par3atA rahA usa pustaka ke prAraMbha meM jo kucha prastAvanA ruA meM gujarAtI bhASA meM parantu deva nAgarI akSaroM meM likhA huprA thA usako ThIka Thoka par3a gayA unameM yaha batAyA gayA thA ki ina saMskRta TIkAmoM kA banAne vAle kauna prAcArya the / ( 59 ) " - vaisI hI bar3I do tIna zrIra chapI huI pustakeM aura dUsarI bar3I sI vaisI hI pustaka thI jisakA pustakeM mUrtipUjaka sampradAya ke prasiddha AcArya AtmArAma pustakeM acchI bar3I thI merI unako par3hane kI icchA huI / prathana maiMne jaina tatvAdarza ko par3hanA zuru kiyA / isa prakAra vyavasthita rupa se jaina dharma ke sva pa ko batAne vAlI koI pustaka maiMne 4 thI jinameM eka kA nAma jena tatvAdarza nAma tatvanirNayaprAsAda thA / ye donAM urpha vijayAnanda sUrI kI banAI huI thIM /

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( 88 ) mero jIvana prapaMca kathA - - - - aba taka nahIM par3hI thI usake anta meM bhagavAna mahAvIra se lekara una prAcAryo kA itihAsa likhA gayA thA jina AcAryoM kI paramparA meM pustaka likhane vAle svayaM bhI eka prAcArya hue / ye prAcArya mUrtipUjaka sampradAya ke tapAgaccha nAmaka zAkhA ke anuyAyI the / merI rUci itihAsa ke jAnane kI ho rahI thaa| isalie jaina dharma ke ina pUrvAcAryoM kA itihAsa par3hakara mujhe kucha itihAsa ke prakAza kA prAbhAsa hone lgaa| maiM kaI daphe ina bAtoM ko par3hatA rhaa| jaina dharma kI pUrva paramparA kA thor3A : [ bhI jJAna mujhe isa pustaka ke par3hane se hone lgaa| isake bAda dUsarI una prAcArya kI bar3I pustaka jo tattva nirNaya prAsAda nAmaka thI, usako par3hanA zurU kiyA lekina isa grantha meM aneka viSayoM kA pAlekhana thA jo usa samaya merI jJAna kI sImA ke bAhara thA / usake antagata kucha jaina dharma se sambandha rakhane vAle prAcIna zilA lekhoM kA bhI varNana diyA gayA thaa| mathurA meM milI huI kucha do hajAra varSa jitanI purAno jainamUrtiyo ke zilA lekhoM ke bAre meM bhI kaI bAteM likhI huI thI jinheM par3hakara maiM vismIta sA huA / hamAre usa sampradAya ko mAnyatA ke anusAra to jaina mandira aura mUrtiyoM kA bananA, bhagavAna mahAvIra ke nirvANa se kaI 820-600 varSa pIche zurU huyA / isa mUtipUjA ko calAne vAle pAkhaMDI prAcArya the unhoMne apanI peTa-pUga kI dRSTi se mUrtipUjA kA pAkhaNDa calAyA ityaadi| isalie mUrtipUjA sthAnakavAsI sampradAya meM mAnya nahIM hai| usa viSaya kI choTI-bar3o kaI pustakeM jo likhI gaI, mujhe unakA to vizeSa jJAna nahIM thA para kaI bAra mUrtipUjA ke bAre meM hamAre sAdhu loga jo carcAe karate rahate the, usakA kucha thor3A sA mujhe pariz2Ana thA / usa viSaya kI samakotasAra nAma ko eka pustaka sthAnakavAso svAmo je upala nI ne banAI thI vaha maiMne jarUra par3hI thI kyoMki merI rUci jina mandira pora jina mUti ke vidha meM jAnane kI rahA karatI thI pUrvAvasthA meM maiM jaina yatijanoM ke saMmaga meM rahA thA isalie mere mana meM jaina mandira tathA jina mUrti ke saMskAra dabe hue the isakA vizeSa carcA kA to yahA~ koI khAsa prasaMga nahIM hai / ___ mujhe ukta tatva nirNaya prAsAda grantha meM 2000 varSa purAne jaina mUrtiyoM ke levoM ke visara meM kucha, jJAna prApta kara merI ukta viSayaka mAnyatA meM sadehAtmaka vicAra utpanna hone lage / maiM socane lagA ki isa prakAra jaba 2.00 varSa se bhI adhika purAnI jaina mutiyA milatA hai aura usameM kaI bar3e purAne prAcAryoM ke nAma milate haiM jo kalpasUtra kI therAvalA ke nAmoM se sabaMdha rakhate haiN| yaha jAnakara merI jaina mUrtiyoM kI prAcInatA ke viSaya meM bhI jo mAnyatA thI usa meM parivartana hone lgaa| isI prakAra una prAcArya kI banAI huI eka anya pustaka bhI una pustakoM meM mere dekhane

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sthAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava ( 86 ) meM pAyI jisakA nAma ajJAnatimirabhAskara thaa| isa grantha meM khAsakara jaina dharma ke bAre meM brAhmagoM ke veda Adi granyoM meM, jo prAkSepAtmaka bAteM haiM, unakA utara usI taraha diyA gayA thaa| svAmI dayAnandajI ne bhI satyArtha prakAza nAmaka pustaka meM jo jaina mata ke prAkSepa rUpa meM lI vA humA thA, usakA bhI khaNDana Adi kiyA gayA thaa| isa prakAra una prAcArya AtmArAmajI ke, ina granthoM ko par3hakara mere mana meM unako vidvavattA aura gahare jJAna kA bahuta prabhAva par3ane lagA una do mahinoM meM unake granthoM ko maiMne kaI bAra pddh'aa| mere mana meM hone lagA ki aise hI kisI vidvAna kI sevAmeM rahakara mujhe apanA jJAna bar3hAnA cAhiye / ___ ukta pustakoM meM unake jovana caritra ke bAre meM bhI jo kucha bAteM likhI huI thIM unako bhI maiMne ThIka Dhaga se par3hI / usase mAlUma huA ki ve bhI pajAba meM pahale sthAnakavAsI sampradAya dIkSita hue the aura bAda meM zAstroM ke adhyayana se unakA vicAra parivartana huaA / tad - nusAra ve mUrtipUjaka sampradAya meM dIkSita hue| unake gurU buTTarAyajI the| jo bhI pahale sthAnakavAsI sAdhu the aura bAda meM mUrtipUjaka sAdhu kA veSa dhAraNa kara saMvegI sAdhu bane / prAtmArAmajI to aThAraha sAdhuoM ke sAtha veSa parivartana kara saMvegI sAdhu bane aura phira isa sampradAya meM apano vidvavattA ke kAraNa ve bahuta bar3e prAcArya bane / unakI isa prakAra ko jIvana kathA ne mere mana ko khUba pAndAlita kara diyA / agara mujhe bhI kisI prakAra kA acchA vidyA adhyayana karanA hai tA vasa hA kisI mArga kA anusaraNa karanA caahiye| maiM ina vicAroM ke kAraNa mana meM prAkulavyAkula rahane lgaa| tapasvI jI ko isa bAra ko tapasyA meM pichale dinoM meM zithalatA kA anubhava hAne lgaa| pahale ko taraha unakA vyAkhyAna aAdi meM utsAha nahIM dikhAI dene lagA / kamajorI adhika mahasUsa hone ke kAraNa pichale kucha 15-20 dinoM meM ve dahI ke maThTha kA ve upayoga karane lge| hama una sAdhunoM ke sivAya anya kisI ko ye bAta jJAta nahIM hone do / acaladAsajI aura munnAlAla jo zrAvakoM ke ghara se dahI bahara lAte the / aura use acchI taraha thor3e se pAnI meM ghola kara tapasvI jI ko pilA diyA jAtA thaa| yU unakA zarIra ThIMganA aura acchA gaTholA thA to kI usa para kamajorI kA prabhAva dikhAI par3a rahA thA / vyAkhyAna meM bhI unake pAsa munnAlAlajI baiThA karate aura ve kucha DhAla, caupAI Adi sunAyA karate / maiM thAnaka kI Upara kI maMjila meM baiThA rahatA aura kucha kizora bhAI-bahana mere pAsa Akara

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e ) baiTha jAte aura mere sAtha kaI prakAra kI sAmAnya bAteM kiyA karate / pahale maiM jisa taraha unakI bAtoM meM rasa letA thA vaha rasa merA aba kama hotA jA rahA thaa| merI tarapha vaise bhAI-bahanoM kA kucha adhika AkarSaNa rahatA thA / parantu aba mujhe vaha ArkaSaNa bhAva eka prakAra kA bandhanasvarUpa lagane lagA | kaba aura kaise isa bandhana kI mamatA se meM mukta banU isI vicAra ko dina rAta mana hI mana socA karatA aura kisI ko mere mana kA jarA bhI prAbhAsa na hone pAve isakA rAstA maiM khojane lagA / tapasvIjI kI mamatA mujha para saba adhika thI aura maiM inako gu cupa chor3akara calA jAU~ to inake mana ko kaisA AghAta pahu~cegA, isakI kalpanA mujhe vya banAtA rahatI thI / parantu eka na eka dina mujhe apane jIvana krama ko aba nizcita rUpa se badalanA hai aura jaba kabhI maiM aisA karU~gA, taba tapasvIjI ko prAghAta hogA hI / aiso bAteM meM rAta ko bichaune meM par3A-par3A kaI dinoM taka socatA rahA / mero jovana prapaMca kathA me maiM zauca ke lie hamezA kSiprA nadI ke taTa kI tarapha jAtA rahatA thA kabhI anya sAdhutroM ke sAtha aura kabhI-kabhI maiM akelA hI kSiprA nadI kA jo relve kA pula thA usakI bAI tarapha 200-400 kadama ke phAsale para eka khAlI U~cI patthara kI caTTAna thI usa caTTAna para maiM kaI daphA jAkara baiThA karatA aura nadI kA pravAha tathA sAmane ke khetoM vagairaha ke hRSyoM kA dekhane se merA mana prasanna rahatA thA / vahA~ para baiThe2 eka dina sahasA mere mana meM strIkRta bandhana mukti pAne kA aspaSTa khayAla ho aayaa| usa caTTAna se kucha ho dUrI para relve kA lambA pula thA jisa para bagala meM manuSyoM ke calane ke lie paTarI banI huI thI / usa paTarI para ha loga prAyaH nadI ko pAra karate rahate the / usako dUsarI tarapha dAhinI ora kucha dUrI para vaha maTha thA jisameM maiM kisana bhairava ke rUpa meM 7-8 varSa pahane 2-3 mahine rahA thA / usakI vaha smRti mere mana meM ho AI ki kisa taraha eka rAta ko maiM gupacupa u| maTha se cala nikalA aura khAkhI bAbA ke bheSa sparUpa jo DaMDa, kamaNDala, cimaTA Adi cIjeM mere pAsa thI unako kSiprA nadI meM bahAkara naye rAste para cala par3A / ThIka vasA hI aba yaha eka aura prasaga mere lie upasthita hotA huA mujhe dRSTi gocara hone lagA / yaha kalpanA kucha prAghAta janaka bho tho aura jIvana ke kisI naye pravAha meM kUda par3ane ko preraNAdAyaka bhI thA / tapasvIjI kI tapasyA kA pAraNA zAMti pUrvaka ho gayA / hamezA kI taraha adhika logoM kA koI AvAgamana nahI rahA / 10-20 dinoM meM ve ThIka svastha hA gaye / merA udvighna mana mere dhairya ko kuTA rahA thA aura maiM usa dina kI zighratA se pratikSA karane lagA / mere mana meM

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sthAnakavAso saMpradAya kA jovanAnubhava pAyA ki yadi raMgalAla hotA to usase maiM kiso sthAna vizeSa aura kisI mUrtipUjaka sAdhu vizeSa kA paricaya prApta kara letA aura tadnusAra maiM usa sthAna tathA vyakti kI khoja meM nikala pdd'taa| parantu aba vaisI kucha jAnakArI prA ta hone kI sambhAvanA na samajha kara, svayaM hI bhaTakakara, kahIM koI lakSabhUta sthAna kI khoja meM, ajJAta rUpa se nikala par3ane ke lie maiMne mana ko taiyAra kiyA / kisI se pUchane para mujhe mAlUma hugrA ki pAsa ho jo relave kA sTezana hai vahA~ se zAma ke samaya kucha aMdherA hote2 hI eka gAr3I phatehAbAda sTezana kI tarapha jAto hai| maiMne socA ki kiso taraha gupcu| isa gAr3I meM baiThakara jovana kA nayA rAstA pakar3atA Thoka hogA / ve caumAse ke dina the do dina kAphI pAnI ko jhar3iyA~ AtI rhii| rAta ko bhI raharaha kara pAnI barasatA rahA / dopahara ke 3-4 baje bAda varSA kucha banda huI, taba acaladAsajI aura munnAlAlajI najadIka ke zrAvakoM ke vahA~ se AhAra pAnI bahara lAye / sabake sAtha baiThakara maiMne bhI pAhAra pAnI kiyA / sadhyA hone meM koI ghaNTA bhara kI derI tho AkAza meM bAdala ghira rahe the maiMne socA ki rAta meM phira joroM se varSA hogii| taba maiMne tapasvI jI se kahA ki do-tIna dina hue maiM bAhara zauca nahIM gayA isalie maiM zauca hA pAtA hU~ / varSA pAne vAlo dikha rahI hai isalie maiM jaldA ho kisI vaimo ho najadoka ko bhUmi maiM zoca se nivRta ho pAnA cAhatA hU~ / mero zauca jAne kI Adata hamezA kahIM bAhara acchI jagaha meM jAne kI rahI hai anya sAdhunoM ko taraha maiM kisI aiso vaisI jagaha meM zaca nivRti nahIM kara sakatA thA na kabhI rAta virAta hI maiM zauca se nivRta hotA thaa| aisI anukUla jagaha na milatI to maiM do-do tInatona dina taka zauca nahIM jAtA thA / kaI sAdhu samaya besamaya malatyAga kI kriyA apane pAsa vAle koI aise pAtra meM kara use sthAnaka ke bAhara rAste Adi meM visarjota karate dekhe gae the| mujhe isakI bar3I ghRNA rahatI thI maiMne kabhI usa veSa meM aiso mala visarjana kriyA nahIM kii| kucha zubha prakRti ke udaya se merA zArIrika saMgaThana ThIka banA huaA hone se mujhe isa viSaya meM koI aniyamitatA kA athavA kaSTa kA khAsa anubhava nahIM huaa| Aja isa nivAsI varSa kI umra meM bho mero yaha zArIrika prakriyA niyamita rahI hai| kisI bimArI vizeSa ke kAraNa kabhI aniyamitatA kA anubhava ho vaha alaga bAta hai parantu svastha dazA meM vaisA anubhava nahIM huA / tAsvIjI merI isa prakRti ko jAnate the isalie unhoMne mujhe kahA ki varSA kA jora dikhAI detA hai isalie jaldI hI nipaTa pAnA / maiMne tahattI kaha kara usakA uttara diyA aura zIghratA se andara jAkara eka kAgaja jo kucha do-tIna dina pahale maine likha rakhA thA usako apane prAsana

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(62) mero jovana prapaMca kathA ke takIye ke nIce isa taraha rakha diyA ki subaha hone para vaha sAdhuoM ke hAtha meM prAjAya / isa kAgaja meM tapasvI jI ko uDDISTa kara nimna Azaya kI do-cAra paktiyAM maiMne likha rakhI thI / usakA Azaya kucha isa prakAra thA "bahuta dinoM se merA mana udvighna rahatA hai mujhe isa sAdhu jIvana meM aba aAnanda nahIM prArahA hai / merI icchA zurU se hI kucha viziSTa prakAra ke vidyAdhyayana karane kI rahI hai / isa choTe se sampradAya meM merI vidyA par3hane ko vaha lAlasA pUrI ho sake aisA mujhe nahIM lagatA / ata: maiM kahIM aise samudAya meM jAnA cAhatA hU~ jahA~ merA par3ane kI bhUkha miTa sake / aApakA sneha mujha para sadA se bahuta adhika rahA hai maiMne bhI prApake mana ko koI dukha ho aisA vyavaha ra kabhI nahIM kiyaa| maiM aApakI prAjJAnusAra sadA apanA sAdhu dharma pAlatA rahA / para maiM apane isa udvidhna mana ko kiso taraha zAMta rakhane meM asamartha hone se aba koI kisI anya rAste jAnA cAhatA hU~ / mere jAne se prApako bahuta prAghAta lagegA aisA maiM acchI taraha jAnatA huuN| para maiM lAcAra hU~ ataH pApa mero isa kRtaghnatA ko kSamA kareM aura mere lie aba pApa ora kiso prakAra kA prayatna na kareM / " kucha thor3A sA pAnI le kara eka pAtra jha lo meM rakhA aura bhare hue hRdaya se usa sthAnaka se bAhara nikalA kucha galiyoM meM hotA huaA maiM kSiprA nadI ko usa caTTAna ko aura ca tthaa| rAstA kucha lambA thA vahA~ pahu~cate-paha~cate bAdala khUba ghira prAye the aura yor3A-thor3I bUnde bhI girane lgii| maiM nadA ke pula ke pukka ra vAle thambe ke nIce jAkara rUhA / dekhA to kSiprA nadI meM bar3e joroM se pAnI kA pravAha bar3ha rahA thA usa khambe se koI 8-10 phuTa ko dUro para pAnI hilole le rahA thA / isa dRzya ko dekhane ke lie merA mana sthaMbhIta sA ho gayA parantu mujhe jisa gAr3I meM baiThakara ravAnA honA thA vaha nado ke pula ke pAsa vAlo kebii| kI tarapha Ate hI vAlI thI isa kehIna se nado ke pula para chATA-bar3I donoM lAIneM eka sAtha calane vAlo hone se gAr3I vahA~ 4-5 miniTa ThaharA karato tho vahIM se gAr3I meM car3hane kA maiMne soca rakhA thA isalie bar3I zIvratA se maiMne apane ra joharaNa ko kholA aura DAMDo nikAla lo phira usa ranoharaNa kA pAtra meM rakhA tathA unake sAtha muha patti bhI kholakara usameM rakha do phira pAtra ko jholI vAle kapar3e meM ThIka bAMdhakara jisa taraha sAta-ATha varSa pahale usa khAkhI bAbA ke bheSa vAle DaMDa, kamaNDala, cimaTA Adi upakaraNoM ko isa nadI meM bahA diyA thaa| usI taraha isa nado ke bahate hue jala pravAha meM use bahAdiyA / kaI varSoM taka jisa rajoharaNa ko maiMne dina-rAta apane sAtha lie phiratA thaa| usako aura jo muha pattI maiMne muha para dina-rAta bA~dha rakhI thI usako bhI mUha se alaga karate hue mere mana meM kaI vicitra bhAva utpanna hue / parantu manuSya kA mana aisA vicitra

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sthAnakavAsI saMpradAya kA jIvanAnubhava hai ki prasaMga vizeSa prApta hone para prANoM se bhI adhika priya, jIvana bhara kI atyanta priya vastu ko bhI kSaNa bhara meM tyAga detA haiM / aura mAno usake sAtha jIvana kA kabhI koI sambandha hI nahIM thA aisI anubhUti karane laga jAtA hai / isI prakAra kSaNa bhara meM una sAdhu veSa batAne vAle upakaraNoM ko maiMne nizceSTa mana meM nadI se bahA diyA aura mere mana meM huA ki aba maiM apane isa jIvana ko aise hI kisI ajJAta pravAha meM bahA dene ke lie nikala rahA hai / na jAne yaha jIvana kA prapaMcamaya piMDa kada aura kahAM jAkara nikalegA ? aisA socatA huA maiM prapanI jo caddara thI usako bIca se phAr3akara AdhI to sira para lapeTa lI aura pradho zarIra para lapeTa lI jo cola paTTA pahane hue thA usako kisAnoM kI taraha dhotInumA banAkara use zarIra ke nIcale bhAga meM lapeTa liyA / ( 63 ) mere pAsa usa samaya kevala ye hI do purAne mele vastra the aura isa prakAra se meM sarvathA niSkicana aura parigraha rahita ho gayA usa samaya meM pANi pAtra digambara to nahIM banA para do sATaka pAlA prAjIvaka bhIkSu avazya bana gayA thA / maiM jaldI pula ke Upara sire para car3ha gayA aura vahA~ se 25-30 kadama ke phAsale para jo gAr3I Akara khar3I huI thI usake eka Dibbe meM jAkara ghusa gayA / varSA joroM se barasanI zurU ho gaI thI aura mere ve kapar3e pAnI se tarabora ho cuke the / gAr3I ke Dibbe meM koI 5-7 hI manuSya idhara-udhara baiThe hue the aura ve bhI merI hI taraha pAnI meM tarabatara the gAr3I meM ghusate hI injIna ne sITI dedI aura gAr3I dhIre-dhIre sarakane lagI kyoMki pula pAsa hI thA aura usa para donoM lAineM eka sAtha bichI huI thI isalie gAr3I Aste Aste calane lgii| maiMne khir3akI se nadI ke jora se bahate hue jala pravAha ko AkhirI bAra dhyAna se dekhA gAr3I ne dhImI AvAja kI ghar3a-ghar3AhaTa ke sAtha pula ko pAra kiyA / isa kSaNa se maiMne apane jIvana ke naye mArga meM pravAsa zurU kiyA /

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maiM hUM bhUlA-bhUta bhUlA phirA maiM sArA jIvana, kahIM na mujhe koI mArga milA / rahA bhaTakatA yoM hI niza dina, na kahIM dekhI koI siddhi zilA / najara na pAyA kahIM koI siddhi vAlA na kahIM dekhA koI jIvana mukta / na milA koI bhava nirmohI, na pAyA koI baMdhana viyukta // yoM jIvana ko mRga tRSNA meM, bhUlA phirA maiM kucha pAne ko / para hAtha na pAyA kucha mujhako, vRthA hI DhUDhA kisI anajAne ko / / koI na milI saccI zraddhA devI, na milA kahIM koI pakkA avdhuut| jIvana ke aba vilaya samaya meM, meM bana rahU~gA bhUlA - bhUta //

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