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[9] Pratikraman in Varying Situations
when he is not even aware. You should oppose his negative behavior. You should make him aware. The position opposing is to make him aware.
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Questioner: If he keeps repeating the mistake every step of the way, then I lose the love and respect for him.
Dadashri: What else can you do? If possible, do not lose love for him, because what else can there be in this time cycle of Kaliyug (period of difficulties due to lack of unity in thoughts, speech and acts)? These relationships are relative (temporary); what else can there be? You, on the contrary, will ruin things for yourself if you take away that love. What do you do when you are not aware of things? So keep it like that. (186)
What good does it do you to know that your son stole some money when you sent him to buy vegetables? You have to accept him the way he is. Can you throw him out? Can you find another son? You won't find another one, will you?
Questioner: What assurance do we have that another will not be worse?
Dadashri: Yes. Ask everything today and get your work
done.
Accept the Other Person
Questioner: So what should we do about a person like that? He keeps making mistakes but he does not repent making them. What can we do when he does not even realize this much?
Dadashri: You should not kill yourself. What else can you do? Killing the body means committing suicide. Then there is the killing of the mind. When the mind is killed, one loses interest in the worldly life. You should not do that; because of that, you would lose interest in your children and everyone else. You should not do that; you should tolerate it and accept it. The
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Pratikraman
worldly life means to accept it any way you can and somehow pass your life. Right now it is the reign of Kaliyug, what can one do in it? There is no safe side anywhere. Consider this the safe side and go to sleep. Sincerity and morality are gone forever. Therefore, take this Gnan; then you can be happy forever. You will have no obstacles like these. Oh! It will be wonderful. Inadequate Pratikraman is Due to Lack of Awareness
Questioner: If someone does not come here anymore because I have upset him, and then egotistically I say, 'I have done my pratikraman. Now what can I do if he does not come anymore?' What about that?
Dadashri: But that is all wrong. In a way, it did occur because of you, through you as a nimit, did it not? So you should do whatever you can. Then, if nothing occurs, so be it. If it does not occur, that does not mean that you have to destroy yourself.
Questioner: That is right. But here we are talking about one's inner understanding, what a person should have in his understanding. I have done my pratikraman; I do not have any negative feelings towards him. If one shoots the bullet, then he can do this much (pratikraman) and it is easy for him to erase it all, but the one who got 'shot by his bullet' is still hurting, is he not?
Dadashri: But he must be hurting so much that he does not come here to do darshan. He should be feeling, 'I met this useless person, so that is why I can't go there.' That is why you have to settle the matter with equanimity, don't you?
Questioner: The other thing is that how can I know that the pratikraman I have done has been effective and that I no longer have any opinions about him? How can I know that my opinions about him have been wiped off one hundred percent?
