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[22] Solution for Sticky Files
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around and then they say that they did the right thing by doing that.
One Sees Only Other's Mistakes
Questioner: Many times, I feel that it is not my mistake. Sometimes I can see my own mistake and sometimes I (lady talking about her father) feel that it is not my mistake; I feel that 'he' is at fault.
Dadashri: Is that what you feel? Then what about while you are doing pratikraman? (360)
Questioner: But when he experiences increasing mental torment and restlessness, then I feel that I should not become a nimit for that.
Dadashri: But you have to do pratikraman as if it is your mistake.
Questioner: But I do not feel that I am at fault. I feel that he is the one at fault.
Dadashri: Without a mistake, no one will get hurt. It is because of our mistake that another person feels hurt.
Questioner: I feel that it is because of his prakruti that he feels hurt.
Dadashri: You cannot consider the prakruti like that. All these people say that his prakruti is good, whereas you are the only one who says that his prakruti is bad. That, too, is a roonanubandha account (link of karma from the past life).
Questioner: I feel that he has a habit of nagging.
Dadashri: That is why it is your fault - it is your mistake. Why do you have to hurt your parents? That is why you have to do pratikraman. They should not get hurt. You should have in your mind that you have come to make them happy. You should be inquiring, 'What mistake did I make that keeps on
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making me hurt my parents?"
Pratikraman
That is When You Will Be Liberated
When You stop 'seeing' faults, then You will be liberated. If someone were to insult you, hurt you financially, or even physically, but despite all that You do not 'see' any faults in him, that is when You will be free from the entanglements of this worldly life.
Have you stopped 'seeing' faults in others?
Questioner: Yes, Dada. I do pratikraman when I 'see' faults in others.
Satsang Destroys Mistakes
Satsang is of no use if it does not destroy your mistakes. Satsang itself means to destroy mistakes. No one should be hurt through your becoming the nimit. If someone does get hurt, then the mistake is yours and that mistake has to be destroyed. And if you cannot find the mistake, then it is the unfolding of your karma and so keep on asking for forgiveness. Ask for forgiveness directly from that person if he is a reasonable man. But if he is unreasonable, then keep asking for forgiveness intemally.
Questioner: Sometimes in trying to settle all the files, I get so entangled that I do not even think about doing pratikraman and samayik. Is that being slack and lazy (pol)?
Dadashri: That is not considered being slack. Slack is when you have the desire but you do not do it.
Questioner: Sooner or later, one will have to do pratikraman for all one's mistakes, will he not?
Dadashri: Don't worry about that. To 'know' (janavoo) the mistakes is more than enough. Pratikraman has to be done when you hurt someone a lot.
