Matrie Ghadya Manvi

Author(s): Kumarpal Desai
Publisher: Gurjar Sahitya Prakashan
Catalog link: https://jainqq.org/explore/034429/1

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mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI kumArapALa desAI

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mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI kumArapALa desAI prAptisthAna gUrjara sAhitya bhavana ratanapoLanAkA sAme, gAMdhImArga, amadAvAda 380001 phona : 079-2214663, 221496600 e-mail: goorjan@yahoo.com, web: gurjarbooksonline.com gUrjara sAhitya prakAzano 102, lenDamArka bilDiMga, TAiTeniyama, siTI senTara pAse, sImA hola sAme, 100 phUTa roDa, prahalAdanagara, amadAvAda 380015 phona : 26934340, 98252 68759 - gurjarprakashanlA gimail.com

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kiMmata : rU. 150 pahelI AvRtti : 2016 Mati E Ghadyan Manavi by Kumarpal Desai Published by Gurjar Granth Ratna Karyalaya, Ahmedabad-1 OM kumArapALa desAI ISBN:978-93-5162-360-1 pRSTha : 8+152 nakala : 1000 prakAzaka : gurjara graMtharatna kAryAlaya amarabhAI ThAkoralAla zAha H ratanapoLanAkA sAme, gAMdhImArga, amadAvAda-380001 phona H 22144663, e-mail: goorjar@yahoo.com **** mudraka : bhagavatI oNphaseTa sI 16, baMsIdhara esTeTa, bAlaDolapurA, amadAvAda-380004 arpaNa AgavI kAryadakSatA ane avirata karmazIlatA, samAjanA kAje ghasAIne UjaLA thavAnI bhAvanA dharAvanAra, sneha, saujanya ane sadbhAvanI preraNAmUrti zrI pI. ke. laherI ane zrImatI nIlAbahena laherIne sAdara arpaNa

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anukrama AraMbhe dhyeyasiddhi mATe jIvana jIvanArA evA mAnavIonI ahIM satya-kathA che ke jemaNe jagatanI vartamAna paristhitine judI dRSTie joI che ane enA ukela mATe potAno Agavo mArga apanAvyo che. AvA mATIe ghaDyAM mANaso A jagatanI dhULamAM ratnonI mAphaka verAyelA che. evAM mAnavaratnonI A kathA che, jemaNe potAnA aMtaranA avAja-Inner Voice-ne anusarIne potAnA hetunI siddhi mATe AkarI tapazcaryA karIne aMte saphaLatA meLavI hoya. A mATe athAga prayAsa karatI vakhate ene UMcA pagAranI nokarI, sukhasAhyabI ke ezaArAmabharyuM jIvana saheje AkarSatuM nathI, balake e potAnA navA mArge ekalavIranI mAphaka prayANa AdarIne potAnI AgavI duniyA racavA mAge che, dhyeyasiddhine mATe ene kahyuMlA ane akathya evA ghaNA paDakAro jhIlavA paDe che. kaparo parizrama kheDavo paDe che. koI parvatArohaka jema eka eka DagaluM bharIne parvata para ArohaNa karato jAya, e rIte potAnI zArIrika maryAdAonI vaccethI mArga kADhIne e zikhara bhaNI jato hoya che. Ane mATe koIe vRddhatvanI ke aMdhatvanI sImA oLaMgavA sAhasa karyuM, to koI jIvaleNa roga sAme ekale hAthe jhajhUmanArA saMzodhako puravAra thayA. koIe tarachoDAyelAM bALakonI, to koIe bhUkhyA raste rajhaLatA lokonI ciMtA karI. mAnavInA hiMmata, khamIra, sAhasa ane azakyane zakya karavAnA puruSArthanA saMdarbhomAM 'apaMganAM ojasa', 'tane apaMga, mane aDIkhama' ane 'nahIM mApha nIcuM nizAna ' jevAM pustakonI sAthe A pustaka paNa vAcakone gamaze. A pustakanA prakAzana mATe gurjara graMtharatna kAryAlayanA zrI manubhAI zAhano AbhArI chuM. AzA rAkhuM chuM ke A pustaka pratyeka vyaktine mATInA mAnavIonI vAstavika saMgharSa-kathAno hRdayasparzI khyAla Apaze ane ene potAnA aMtaranA avAjane anusaravAnuM sAhasa bakSaze. 22-8-2016 kumArapALa desAI amaghavAda 1. karuNAnI akSayadhArA 2. tamannAnAM tapa 3. prANIpremanI balivedI para 4. lokhaMDI dAghajI 5. *koIka divasa' 6. bhItarano avAja 7. bhAratakesarI 8. abola bALakono avAja 9. AkAza mArI muThThImAM 10. mana ke hAre hAra, mana ke jIte jIta 11. bhUkhyA janono jaTharAgni ThAranAra 12. paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga ! 13. paheluM klinika 14, 'suparamenano sauthI moTo 'rala' 15. bhalAInI bhIkha 16. vAMsaLI ane morapiccha 17. kaeNnsarano zikAra ke kaeNnsaranA vijetA ? 18. aMdhane azakya ?

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mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI a kumArapALa desAI 2 sAhityasarjana vivecana : zabdasaMnidhi * bhAvana-vibhAvana * zabdasamIpa * sAhityika nisabata caritra : lAla gulAba " mahAmAnava zAstrI * apaMganAM ojasa * vIra rAmamUrti * sI. ke. nAyaDu * phirAka gorakhapurI * lokhaMDI dAdAjI * lAlA amaranAtha * AphatonI AMdhI vacce samRddhinuM zikhara * mAnavatAnI maheMka * jIvataranI vATe, akSarano dIvo * tane apaMga, mana aDikhama * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI patrakAratva : akhabArI lekhana anuvAda : navavadhU (Aphrikana lekhaka oNsTina bukanyAnI nATyakRtino anuvAda) navalikAsaMgraha : ekAMte kolAhala saMpAdana : sAhitya ane patrakAratva ja narmadaH AjanA saMdarbhamAM ja bALasAhitya saMgoSThi * ekavIsamI sadInuM bALasAhitya * adAvata vinAnI adAlata * eka divasanI mahArANI " huM pote (nArAyaNa hemacaMdra) + The unknown life of Jesus Christ * caMdravadana mahetA nATyazreNI bhA. 1 thI 5 ciMtana : jhAkaLa bhInAM motI 1-2-3 * motInI khetI * mAnavatAnI maheka * tRSA ane tRpti " zraddhAMjali * jIvananuM amRta * du:khanI pAnakharamAM AnaMdano eka Tahuko * maheMka mAnavatAnI * jhAkaLa banyuM motI * kSaNano sAkSAtkAra * phUlanI AMkhe, jhAkaLa motI " kSaNano utsava * prasannatAnAM puSpo * zraddhAnAM sumana je jIvananuM javAhira mananI mirAta * zIlanI saMpadA bALasAhitya : vatana, tArAM ratana * DAhyo Damaro * keDe kaTArI, khabhe DhAla * birAdarI * motane hAthatALI * jhabaka dIvaDI * haiyuM nAnuM, hiMmata moTI * nAnI uMmara, moTuM kAma * bhIma * cAlo, pazuonI duniyAmAM 1-2-3 * vahetI vAto * motInI mALA * vAtonAM vALu * Dhola vAge DhamADhama * sAcanA sipAhI * katharoTamAM gaMgA hiMdI pustako : dina tana, mana mana + AnaMdana aMgrejI pustako : Jainism : The Cosmic Vision & The Brave lleart * APinnacle of Spirituality * Our life in the context of five Anuvrat and Anekantwad Influence of Jainism on Mahatma Gandhi Tirthankara Mahavir Glory of Jainism * Non-violence: A way of life * Stories from Jainism. (tathA saMzodhana, saMpAdana temaja hiMdI ane aMgrejImAM anya trIsa pustako) kumArapALa desAI

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karuNAnI akSayadhArA jhAkajhamALa bharelI duniyAmAM behAla insAnanA dilanI vedanA ke peTanI bhUkhanI kone khabara che ? bhavya utsavomAM vAgatAM beMDavAjAM ke DI.je. athavA dhArmika mahotsavomAM UDatI dhananI AMdhaLI relamachela ke pachI rAjakIya rUAba chAMTavA mATe vaparAtA karoDo rUpiyAnA khaNakhaNATamAM bhUkhyA peTano taraphaDATa kone saMbhaLAya ? e phUTapAtha, laeNTaphaoNrma ke raste rajhaLatI jiMdagIne koNa AzAyeza ApI zake ? Izvare mAnavIne peTa ApavAnI sAthosAtha bhukhanI asahya pIDA ApI che. jeNe bhUkhanuM jIvaleNa du:kha veThyuM che, enI kahAnI lakhavA mATe AMsunI kalama paNa bejAna che. UMcA AvAso, siddhi-prasiddhinA samAraMbho ke pachI thatAM bhavya Ayojano nArAyaNan kriznan karanArane kyAreya koI phUTapAtha para ke koI pulanI nIce behAla dazAmAM, bhUkhathI taraphaDatA

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mAnavIo najare paDyA che kharA ? AvA phaTehAla, cIMtharehAla ane behAla mAnavIne joIne koIe enA tarapha lAgaNIbharI mITa mAMDI che kharI ? ke pachI maMdiramAMthI bahAra nIkaLatA rastA para beThelAM ane hAtha laMbAvIne bhIkha mAgatAM vRddha ke vRddhAo tarapha napharatabharI najara pheMkI che ? A duniyAnI tAsIra evI badalAI gaI che ke e bhUkhyA ane cIMtharehAla lokone potAnA dilanI hamadardI ApavAne badale emane prakhara duzmana mAne che. jANe koI zatru AkramaNa karavA dhasI Avyo hoya ema ene najIka AvatAM tarachoDe che, dhikkAre che, enA tarapha DoLA kADhe che athavA to moM macakoDe che. annane mATe valakhAM mAratAM loko kacarAnA gaMjamAMthI khAvAnA TukaDA zodhatAM hoya che. emanA hADapiMjara jevA zarIrane poSavA mATe emanI A sauthI moTI jIvana-mathAmaNa hoya che. koI lagnasamAraMbha pachI bahAra pheMkI dIdhelA annane mATe paDApaDI thatI hoya che ane AvuM eThuM, nAkhI devA mATe rAkheluM anna ApanAra paNa e mAgaNone dhikkAratA hoya che. enA tarapha gALo ke apazabdo bolatA hoya che ane pachI koI dAnezvarI 'dAna' kare, e rIte e eThuM, vadheluM yA vAsI anna emanA tarapha pheMkatA hoya che. ApaNA dezamAM peTanI bhabhUkatI AgathI sisakatI jiMdagIo copAsa rajhaLatI hoya che ane kyAreya jagatanA rakSaNahAra, mAnavInA tAraNahAra, karuNAnA svAmI ane anukaMpAnA srota samAna prabhunAM guNagAna gAnArAoe A jiMdagInI vedanA jANavAno lezamAtra prayAsa karyo nathI, emanA tarapha dRSTi pheravI nathI ane ethI AvI aneka jiMdagIo pArAvAra bhUkhathI maravAne vAMke jIvatI hoya che. ane kevI hoya che e jiMdagI ? mAMDa mAMDa aMga DhAMke evuM phATeluM kapaDuM hoya che, vadhI gayelA vikharAyelAM dADhI-vALa hoya che, rojeroja bhUkha sAme jaMga khelatAM emanI kamara sAva bevaDa vaLI gaI hoya che. emanA caherA para mAtra ne mAtra udAsI hoya che. AMkhomAM zUnyatA hoya che ane mAtra zvAsa cAlato hovAthI jIvatA hovAno ahesAsa Ape che. A rajhaLatA mAnavIonI jiMdagImAM jo koI DokiyuM kare, to khyAla Ave ke AmAM evAM keTalAMya hoya che ke jemanI pAse bhIkha mAgavAnI paNa zakti hotI nathI. emane emanuM ghara yAda nathI, kAraNa ke jiMdagImAM rahevA 2 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI lenovo mATe ghara maLyuM hoya to yAda rahe ne ! mAtA ane pitA e to dUranI vAta che, are ! keTalAMkane potAnAM nAma sudhdhAM yAda nathI ! AvI sthiti koNe joI nathI? paNa koI nArAyaNan kriSnan jevo virala mAnavI hoya che ke je bIjAnAM duHkhane potAnA hRdayamAM samAvIne potAnI zakti ane kSamatAthI emane madada kare che. tamilanADunA madurAInA nArAyaNan kriznanA jIvanamAM eka ja svapna hatuM ane e svapnuM e hatuM ke avvala darajjAnA 'zaeNpha' banavuM ane te paNa koI phAiva sTAra hoTalanA. hajI mAMDa vIsI vaTAvI e bAvIsamA varSamAM pravezyo. kaoNlejamAM sauthI kAmayAba 'zaeNpha' mATeno avaoNrDa meLavI gayo. eka ekathI caDiyAtI moMthI vAnagIo vacce enI jiMdagI sukhethI pasAra thatI hatI. ane nasIbe evo sAtha Apyo ke ene beMgAlurunI phAiva sTAra tAja hoTalamAM zaeNphanI nokarI maLI. bhUkhyA ane garIba lokone bhojana karAvato nArAyaNa kriSnan jiMdagInAM moTAM svapno ghaNI nAnI vaye siddha thayAM ane ati dhanADhya ane prasiddha loko mATe AMgaLAM cATI jAya evI Diza taiyAra karavI, e enA jIvananuM aMtima dhyeya hatuM. jiMdagImAM tarakkIno eka navo rAha khUlI gayo ane ene sviTjharlenDanI eka phAiva sTAra hoTalamAM zaeNphanI nokarI mATenI oNphara maLI. pagAranA AMkaDAo vadhatA jatA hatA ane jiMdagImAM ema hatuM ke have sukhanAM saghaLAM svapno pUrAM thaze. Ave samaye nArAyaNan kriznanu mAtApitAne maLavA mATe beMgAluruthI madurAI Avyo. manamAM evI icchA paNa karuNAnI akSayadhArA * 3

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kharI ke sviTjharlenDamAM kAyamI nokarI svIkAratAM pahelAM thoDo samaya mAtApitA sAthe vahAlathI vitAvuM. dakSiNa bhAratanA madurAI zaheranA maMdire darzana karavA jato hato. A samaye rastAmAM pasAra thatI vakhate eNe eka dRzya joyuM ane e dRzya nArAyaNannA jIvananAM saghaLAM svapno dharAzAyI kare tevo dharatIkaMpa sarjyo. eNe joyuM to eka pula nIce eka ati vRddha mAnavI potAnA ja maLanI aMdarathI anAjanA dANA zodhI rahyo hato. A dRzyae nArAyaNane kaMpAvI mUkyo. pahelAM to lAgyuM ke zuM A kharekhara hakIkata che ke svapna ? enuM mana eno svIkAra karavAnI nA pADatuM hatuM. e thoDI vAra Ubho rahyo. jamIna sAthe jaDAI gayo. A koI bhUta to nathI ne ! paNa jyAre A dazya kaThora-naThora vAstavika hakIkata che, ema jANyuM tyAre enuM samagra astitva hacamacI UThyuM. ene vaibhavI hoTalomAM atyaMta moMghI kiMmate mojamajA karatA lokonA caherAo yAda AvyA. e loko udarapUrti arthe AvatA nahotA, paNa manojane mATe AvatA hatA. koI dostI bAMdhavA mATe Ave, koI daMbha ke dekhAva laIne Ave. koI nANAM uDADavA Ave che ane Amatema thoDuMghaNuM khAIne bAkInuM eMThuM mUkI vidAya letA hatA. DizamAMnI mAMDa aDadhI vAnagIo Aroge ane bAkInI badhI ema ne ema paDI rahe. eNe vicAryuM ke huM taLelA bhAtanI pleTa mArI hoTalamAM chasso rUpiyAmAM ApuM chuM ane AvI moMghI vAnagIo khAvA AvanAra e pleTamAMthI kyAreka ekAda camaco Aroge che. aDadhuM bhojana eMThuM mUkyA pachI e bhojananA AnaMdanI rasabharI carcA kare che. koI bijhanesanI vAta kare che to koI raMgatabharI jiMdagI mANe che. zuM huM AvA lokone mATe utkRSTa vAnagIo banAvavA mArI jiMdagI kharcI rahyo chuM ? kyAM AvI jiMdagI ane kyAM mArA khudanA zahe2mAM nirAdhAra, besahArA vRddha mAnavIne potAnI ja viSTAnA DhagamAMthI dANA phaMphoLIne khAvAnI lAcArI ! A dazya nArAyaNanI bhItaramAM visphoTa sarjyo. e najIkanI raeNDI tarapha doDyo. emAM je koI khAvAnuM hatuM te ApavAnuM kahyuM. reMkaDIvALA pAse 4 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI garIba, bhUkhyA ane vRddhono sAthI nArAyaNan kriSnan mAtra IDalI hatI. nArAyaNane pAMca IDalI kharIdI ane doDyo pelA pula nIce potAnI viSTAmAMthI dANA khoLatA vRddha pAse. eNe keLanA pAnamAM rAkhelI pAMca IDalI enI sAme dharI. e joIne vRddhanI gamagIna AMkhomAM Azcarya UpasI AvyuM. eNe nArAyaNan tarapha joyuM ane pachI e pAMce IDalI ati jhaDapathI khAvA lAgyo. nArAyaNane eNe bhojana karato joyo. zaeNpha hovAne kAraNe ene bhojana karatA loko sAthe varSothI gharobo hato. paNa kyAreya koIne ATalI jhaDapathI IDalI khAtAM ke bhojana karatAM joyA nahotA. e bhUkhyoDAMsa vRddha enA dhrUjatA hAthe IDalI khAto hato, paNa enI AMkhamAMthI anarAdhAra AMsu vahye jatAM hatAM. e AMsu keTalAya divasonI kaDakaDatI bhUkha tRpta thayAnA harSanAM AMsu hatAM. enI udaratRptinA AnaMdanAM e AMsu hatAM. nArAyaNan kriznana maMdiramAM darzana karIne ghera Avyo, paNa enA manamAM pracaMDa jhaMjhAvAta jAgyo. zuM pote sevelAM sukhanAM saghaLAM svapnAM eTalAM badhAM svArthI hatAM ke AsapAsanI duniyA tarapha eNe kyAreya joyuM ja nahIM ? zuM eNe karuNAnI akSayadhArA * 5

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nirAdhAranI dADhI karato nArAyaNanuM kriSnanuM siddhinI evI doTa mukI ke jeNe dezanA mahine sAta AMkaDAvALA pagArathI saMtoSa nahIM mAnIne videzamAM vasavAnuM nakkI karyuM? zuM pote uttama vAnagIo banAvIne saheje bhUkha vinAnA dhanikonA manoraMjana mATe ke emanA caTAkedAra svAda mATe jiMdagI jIvavAno nirdhAra karyo che ? e rAtre nArAyaNanuM sUI zakyo nahIM. manamAM A vicAroe evuM tophAna jagAvyuM ke mArA dezamAM gharavihoNAM hajAro loko ukaraDAmAM khAvAnuM zodhatAM roja bhUkhyA sUI jAya che. emanI jiMdagI rastA para rakhaDatAM prANIothI paNa badatara hoya che. koI eThuM-jUThuM ke keTalAya divasanuM vAsI khAvAnuM maLe, topaNa e hoMze hoMze khAtAM hoya che. vaibhavI hoTalonI bahAra jyAre eMThuM bhojana pheMkavAmAM Ave che, tyAre ene jhaDapavA mATe cAMca mAratA kAgaDAo vaccethI e TukaDo jhaDapI levA jora lagAvatAM garIba bALako yAda AvyAM. A garIbo bImAra che, nirAdhAra che ane keTalAka jiMdagInI hAlatane kAraNe mAnasika rIte pAgala jevA banI gayAM che. emanI koI saMbhALa letuM nathI, evAM lokonuM zuM ? pachInA divase savAre nArAyaNanuM kriznane lAkho DaoNlaranI kamANI ApatI nokarI ThukarAvIne je maNe jiMdagImAM mAtra Thokaro ja khAdhI che evAM lokone mATe kAma karavAnuM nakkI karyuM. e divase nArAyaNanuM krijhanane vAnagIo banAvI, paraMtu koI hoTalanA AlIzAna khaMDamAM sAthIonA sAthathI banAvI nahIM, paraMtu potAnA gharanA rasoDAmAM eNe bhojana banAvyuM. pote rAMdheluM bhojana laIne e pelA vRddhane jamADavA mATe gayo. AgaLanA divase e lAcAra ane nirbaLa vRddha je jhaDapathI IDalI khAI gayo hato, e smaraNa enA manamAMthI khasyuM nahotuM, paNa Aje eNe e azakta vRddhane potAnA hAthe bhojana khavaDAvyuM ane pachI to nArAyaNanuM kriznanno A rojiMdo krama banI gayo. aThavADiyA pachI nArAyaNanuM kriznanuM madurAI choDIne beMgAluru pAcho Avyo. tAjahoTalamAM potAnI nokarI para hAjara thayo ane pachI rojiMdA krama pramANe e avanavI svAdiSTa vAnagIo banAvavAmAM joDAyo, paraMtu have e vAnagIno svAda ene besvAda lAgato hato. enI maghamaghatI sugaMdha ene 6 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI gUMgaLAvanArI lAgatI hatI. pahelAM to koI navI vAnagI banAvavA mATeno eno utsAha evo hato ke potAnA mahemAnone khuza karavA koIka evI navI ja vAnagI banAvuM ke jeno svAda emanI jIbhe coMTI jAya, paNa have enuM mana kAmamAM lAgatuM nahotuM. potAnI sAme vAnagIo mATenAM zAkabhAjI ane masAlAono Dhagalo paDyo hato, paraMtu enI najara sAme be koLiyA mATe taraphaDatA loko dekhAtA hatA. manamAM bhAre mathAmaNa thaI, becenI thaI. AMkhamAM joyelI vedanAnAM AMsu UmaTI AvyAM ane bhItaramAMthI eka avAja Avyo. | 'kriSnanuM, tuM phAiva sTAra hoTalanI hAi-phAi vAnagIo banAvanAro kAbela zaMpha banIne Dhagalo kaladAra meLavavA mAge che ? zuM bhUkha vagaranA lokone utkRSTa bhojana ApavA cAhe che ? ke pachI tuM bhUkhyAMjanonA jaTharAgninI Aga bujhAvavA mATe sarjAyo che ?" ane e kSaNe nArAyaNan kriznane UMcA pagAranI UMcI nokarIne tilAMjali ApI. beMgAluru choDIne madurAI pahoMcI gayo. sviTjharlenDanI phAiva sTAra hoTalanI nokarInuM maLeluM posTiMga paNa ThukarAvI dIdhuM ne potAnA ja gharanA rasoDAmAM besIne eNe bhUkhyAMjano mATe bhojana banAvavAno prAraMbha karyo. karuNAnI ayadhArA 7

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'eka ja de cinagArI'no jhabakAro maLI jAya, tyAre mAnavInuM jIvana eka kSaNamAM parivartana pAmatuM hoya che. hRdayamAM aNadhAryuM eka evuM ajavALuM phelAya ke pachI ene jIvanaprakAzanI pagadaMDI maLI jAya che ane saghaLuM choDIne koI phakIranI mAphaka 'ekalo jAne re'nI jema cAlavA lAge che. nArAyaNan kriSnane AvA upekSito mATe kAma karavAno nirdhAra karyo ane potAnA gherathI saMbhAra, bhAta ke IDalI banAvIne besahArA, gharabAravihoNA, raste rakhaDatA lokone bhAvapUrvaka bhojana khavaDAvavAnuM zarU karyuM. ene mATe bhUkhyAne bhojana ApavuM eTalAmAM ja kAryasiddhi nahotI, paraMtu e bhUkhyA lokone hRdayanA bhAvathI potAnA hAthe bhojana karAvavuM e enI jIvanasiddhi hatI. nArAyaNan kriSnanA AvA aNadhAryA nirNaye enA gharane uparataLe karI dIdhuM. enAM mAtApitAne lAgyuM ke AkhI jiMdagI dIkarA pAchaLa ghasI nAkhI ane have buDhApAmAM ene AdhAre jIvavAnuM AvyuM, tyAre putre pAgala jevuM pagaluM bharyuM. peTe pATA bAMdhIne dIkarAne bhaNAvyo ane aMte eNe UMcAmAM UMcI nokarI meLavI. e nokarI choDI zA mATe navarA mANasonuM kAma eNe potAne mAthe lIdhuM ? mAtApitAe eno prabaLa virodha karyo. enI mAtA to vAraMvAra nArAyaNane gussAmAM kahetI paNa kharI ke 'garIbone madada karavI sArI bAbata che, paNa badhuM choDIne enI pAchaLa khuvAra thavuM e jiMdagInI sauthI moTI bhUla che. jo juvAnIne bhUkhyAjanonI pAchaLa ghasI nAkhIza, to buDhApAmAM tAre amArI mAphaka bhUkhamaro veThavAno vAro Avaze.' nArAyaNan mAtApitAnI hRdayanI pIDAne ane emanI vyAkuLa manaHsthitine samajato hato. mAtApitAe peTe pATA bAMdhI nArAyaNane bhaNAvyo hato. ene mATe teo ghaNI karakasarathI jIvyAM hatAM ane have jyAre UMcI kamANInAM svapno sAkAra thaI gayAM hatAM, tyAre eNe e tamAma svapnono cheda uDADI dIdho ! eka divasa nArAyaNane ati vyathita mammIne kahyuM, 'tamAruM du:kha ane AghAta huM samajuM chuM, paNa sAthosAtha tame mArA dilanI vAta paNa samajo. tame mArI sAthe Avo. mAruM kAma juo ane pachI tame jo nA kahezo, to sadAne 8 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI mATe A kAmane huM tilAMjali ApI daIza.' pahelAM to enI mammI taiyAra thaI nahIM, paraMtu aMte putranA ati Agrahane zaraNe gaI. nArAyaNan emane AsapAsanA vistAramAM laI gayo. emAM vasatA garIba-bhUkhyAjanonI hAlata batAvI. mUrajhAI gayelA nirAdhAronA caherAo enA bhojanathI kevA hasI UThe che te batAvyuM. duHkhI, tarachoDAyelA lokonA mukha paranA anupama saMtoSane enI mAtAe najare joyo. Ama cha kalAka sudhI pharIne nArAyaNan ghera pAcho Avyo ane pachI e mammIne abhiprAya pUche, te pahelAM ja enAM mammIe kahyuM, 'beTA, tuM jIvanabhara A lokone khavaDAvavAnuM kAma karaje. huM tane khavaDAvIza.' thoDA divaso pasAra thayA. nArAyaNane joyuM ke melA-ghelA, dADhI-mUcha vadhI gaI hoya tevA rajhaLatA lokone mAtra bhojana khavaDAvavuM e ja pUratuM nathI. emanI pUratI sArasaMbhALa paNa levI joIe. AthI eNe eka vALa kApanArA nAIne tyAM pArTaTAima kAma karavAnuM zarU karyuM. A joIne ghaNAne AMcako lAgyo, emane samajAyuM nahIM ke ATaluM badhuM bhaNelo-gaNelo brAhmaNa kuLano chokaro dADhI-vALa kApavAnuM kAma kema zIkhe che ? kaI rIte astro calAvavo, dADhI karavI ane hajAmata karavI e zIkhI lIdhuM. are ! e vALa kApavAnI ATha prakAranI sTAilamAM mAhera banI gayo ! A saghaLuM joIne keTalAke to ema mAnyuM ke Ane hajAmanA dhaMdhAmAM loTarI lAgI lAge che, mATe A dhaMdho zIkhe che ! koIe vicAra karyo ke Ane koI phAiva sTAra herakaTiMga salUna kholavI che paNa thoDA samaya bAda to sahue nArAyaNane enI kiTamAM kAMsako, kAtara ane astro laIne pharato joyo. acAnaka eka nirAdhAranI dADhI karato joyo ane sahune bheda maLI gayo. pahelAM eNe eka vAra eka hajAmane vinaMtI karI hatI, ke jarA AnA vALa kApI Apa. paisA huM tane ApIza. paraMtu e nirAdhAra pAgalanuM moM joIne ja vALaMda bhaDakI gayo hato. vALa kApavAnI vAta to bAjue rahI. Aje e bhUkhyAone bhojana ApavA nIkaLe, tyAre cokhAnA moTA tapelAnI sAthosAtha zeviMga kiTa paNa leto jAya. ane pachI rastA para paDelA, melA-ghelA, gaMdA gobarA lokone sAphasUtharA rAkhavAnuM kAma zarU karI dIdhuM. karuNAnI akSayadhArA * 9

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duHkhIonA dilAsA jevA nArAyaNano divasa vahelI savAre cAra vAgyAthI zarU thAya che. enI AkhI TIma ekaso pacIsa mAIla jeTale dUra dUra sudhI jAya che. game teTalI kaDakaDatI ThaMDI hoya ke pachI baLabaLato tApa hoya, to paNa emanuM A rojiMduM kArya aTakatuM nahIM. samAja garIbonI pratye moM pheravI leto hoya che, tyAre nArAyaNan koI khUNe-khAMcare, nirjana jagAmAM rahelA garIbonI zodha kare che. zaheranA pulanI heThaLa ke maMdironI AsapAsa beThelA nirAdhAronI zodha karI, emane nArAyaNan pote taiyAra kareluM bhojana Ape che. e bhojana pauSTika, zAkAhArI, svAdiSTa ane garamAgarama hoya che. nArAyaNan ane enI TIma A lokone bhAvathI bhojana khavaDAve che. roja AvA cAraso lokone bhojana Ape che ane Ane mATe savAra, bapora ane sAMjanuM bhojana pahoMcADavA mATe emane satata pharavuM paDe che. A nirAdhAra lokomAM bhIkha mAgavAnI zakti hotI nathI. madada mAgavA mATe zabdo hotA nathI ane AbhAra mAnavAnI trevaDa hotI nathI. loko emane duzmana gaNe che, haDadhUta kare che, jyAre nArAyaNan emanA bhaya, gabharATa, upekSA ane mAnavIya duHkhanI vedanAne samaje che. kyAreka koI nArAyaNane ema kahe ke 'tame ATalI badhI paLojaNa zA mATe karo cho ? hoTalo ke resTorAMmAM vadhelo khorAka meLavIne emane ApI detA ho to ! bhojana samAraMbhomAM chAMDelo khorAka emane khavaDAvo to zuM vAMdho ? eMTho mUkelo khorAka Apo toya, emaNe to peTa bharavAthI ja kAma che ne !' nArAyaNanuM AvuM karavAnI ghasIne nA pADe che. vaLI keTalAka evI vaNamAgI salAha Ape che ke tame A IDalI, saMbhAra ane bhAta Apo cho, temAM rezananA ke halakI jAtanA cokhA vAparo to zuM vAMdho? A badhAne nArAyaNano eka ja javAba che, "tame koI chAMDelo, eMTho mUkelo, halakA anAjavALo ke nimna kakSAno AhAra ArogI zako kharA? huM khuda Avo khorAka khAI zakuM nahIM, ane je khorAka huM khAI zakuM nahIM e khorAka mArA jevA mAnavIne zA mATe khavaDAvavo joIe ?' Ane kAraNe e evo eMTho, chAMDelo, khorAka leto nathI, paraMtu utsavo, lagnasamAraMbho ke janmadivasa jevA prasaMgoe e sthAnika dAtAonA saMparkamAM rahe che, je loko AvA prasaMgoe dAna ApavAnI bhAvanA dAkhave emanAM dAna 10 * mATIe ghaDavAM mAnavI svIkAre che. nArAyaNae AjathI agiyAra varSa pahelAM 'akSaya TrasTa' nAmanI saMsthAnI sthApanA karI. e kahe che ke 'akSaya' e saMskRta zabda che ane jeno artha thAya che 'kSaya na thAya tevuM eTale ke avinAzI.' paraMtu sAthosAtha e sUcave che ke mAnavInI karuNAno kadI kSaya thavo na joIe. bIjAne madada karavAnI enI bhAvanA haMmezAM jaLavAvI joIe. vaLI hiMdu purANamAM annapUrNA devInuM pAtra e 'akSayapAtra' che. akSayapAtrane mATe ema kahevAya ke je satata bhUkhyAne bhojana Ape che ane tema chatAM e kadI khUTatuM nathI. A TrasTane deza ane videzathI sahAya maLe che, paraMtu A dAna mAtra mahinAnA bAvIsa divasa cAle eTaluM hoya che, bAkInI khoTa enA dAdAe ApelA gharamAMthI maLatA bhADAne umerIne pUrI kare che. e 'akSaya'nA sAdA rasoDAmAM potAnA sAthIo sAthe sUe che ane mAtApitA potAnA A honahAra putrane saghaLI madada kare che. nArAyaNan kahe che ke pijhA levA jatI vyakti rastAmAM paDelI nirAdhAra vyaktine pijhA ApI de evI apekSA rAkhavI khoTI gaNAya, paraMtu zerImAM aDadhI rAtre, kaDakaDatI ThaMDImAM, kazAMya garama kapaDAM vinA dhrUjatI bujhurga vyaktine jo eka nAnakaDo blenkeTa maLe to emanAthI emane jiMdagI jIvavAnI hUMpha maLe che. savAla e che ke potAnI marsIDIjha kAramAM jatI vyaktie AvI nirAdhAra vyaktine joI haze ane ene e paNa khyAla Avyo haze ke AvI behAla vyaktine koI bana ke bargara maLyAM nathI, e saghaLuM jANatA hovA chatAM teo ghora upekSA sAthe marsIDIjha haMkArIne AgaLa cAlyA jaze. nArAyaNano savAla e che ke tamArI bAjunI phUTapAtha para paDelA bhikhArInI tarapha tame kadI najara karo cho kharA ? ene aphasosa e vAtano che ke garIbAInI bAbatamAM loko sarakArane doSa Ape che. sarakArane potAnI nIti hoya che ane ene potAnA saMjogo hoya che, paNa eka vyakti tarIke tame zuM karyuM ? are, tamArA nagaravAsIone mATe sahAyano keTalo hAtha laMbAvyo te vicAravA jevuM che. e kahe che ke garIbAInuM cakra ApaNA samAjamAM anivArya rUpe cAle che, tema chatAM huM koI paNa mAnavIne potAnI viSTAmAMthI potAnI karuNAnI akSayadhArA * 11

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philma suparahITa nIvaDI ane tene traNa nezanala philma eNvaoNrDa maLyA che. have nArAyaNane nirAdhAra, maMdabuddhinA ane pAgala loko mATe AvAsa bAMdhavAnuM zarU karyuM che. enA cAra blaoNka taiyAra thaI gayA che ane bIjA cAra blaoNka mATe Arthika sahayoganI rAha jue che. enA kahevA pramANe A AvAsa baMdhAI gayA pachI mAnasika bImArIthI pIDAtA lokone, upekSA pAmatA vRddhone athavA to hiMsaka AkramaNo sahetI strIone madurAInA rastA para rakhaDavuM nahIM paDe. AvA lokone A phleTamAM vasavATa karAvaze. emane potAnA AvAsane cokhkhuM rAkhavAnuM zIkhavaze, bAgakAma ane rasoDAmAM emanI sakriya madada leze. emane masAlAo ane athANAMo banAvIne vecANanI vyavasthA karI Apaze. eka vAra AvA loko punaHsthApita thAya, pachI emanAM kuTuMbIjano sAthe emano punaH meLApa karAvavo evuM Aje to A pharistAnuM Ayojana che ! cAraso vRddhone divasanA traNa TaMka jAte banAveluM bhojana karAvato nArAyaNanuM bhUkha saMtoSavA annano dANo zodhato joI zakuM nahIM. cAraso vRddhone divasanA traNa TaMka emanI pAse ja Ina bhojana to karAve che. paNa eno hetu madurAInI zerIomAM narakanI yAtanA bhogavatA lokonI mAtra udarapUrtino ja nathI, paraMtu emanAmAM jIvana mATenI navI AzA ane hiMmata jagADavAno che, e emane bhojana Ape che, emane bheTe che, emanI saMbhALa le che ane emane Adara-sanmAna paNa Ape che, emanA vALa kApI Ape, dADhI karI Ape ane emane navaDAve paNa kharo ! paNa sAthosAtha nasIbanI pArAvAra Thokaro khAnArAnA bhItaramAM paDelI lAgaNIne jagADe che. AhAra eka bAbata che, prema bIjI bAbata che. nArAyaNanuM AhAra ApIne emane zArIrika poSaNa Ape che, to prema ane anukaMpA dAkhavIne emane mAnasika poSaNa Ape che. enA jevo koI brAhmaNa AvA gaMdA-gobarA lokone sparza kare, emane cokhkhA kare, emanAM dADhI-mUcha kApe, emane bheTI paDe ke emane khavaDAve, e saMbhAvanA nArAyaNanuM joto nathI, paNa e eTaluM ja kahe che, mArA mATe dareka vyakti samAna che. jiMdagInuM aMtima prayojana zuM ? ApavAnuM. ApavAnuM zarU karI do pachI juo ke ApavAno AnaMda kevo amUlo hoya che. nArAyaNanuM kriSnanA jIvanaprerita ustAda hoTala nAmanI malayAlama 12 * mATIe ghaDavAM mAnavI karuNonI akSayadhArA * 13

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2 vAI phanga lI tamannAnAM tapa dilamAM insAniyatano AtA jalato hoya, to mAnavI AkhI AlamanAM duHkha-darda anubhavI zake che ! jiMdagInI jyota to hara eka mAnavImAM jalatI hoya che, paraMtu potAnA dilanI jyotathI anyanA jIvanane prakAzita karanAra mAnavIo ja A satanI bAMdhI pRthvIno AdhAra che. cInanA tAInjina nagaranA dhULiyA rastA para eka paMcotera varSano dUbaLo-pAtaLo mAnavI paeNDala rikSA calAvato hato. eka jamAnAmAM mANasa pagethI kheMcIne rikSA calAvato hato, je kALakrame paeNDala rikSA banI. kaoNlakAtA mahAnagaranAM e dRzyo sahue joyAM haze, jyAM rikSAcAlaka potAnI peDala rikSA dvArA mAnavasavArI laI jato hoya che. A pagarikSA e eziyAnI pedAza. musApharInA sAdhana tarIke jApAnamAM e 1868mAM zarU thaI. e pachI I. sa. 1880mAM bhAratamAM AvI ane tyArabAda cInamAM pracAra pAmI. cInamAM paeNDala rikSA e AmajanatAnuM vAhana banI rahyuM ane nAnA sAMkaDA mArgo parathI cAlaka paeNDala mArato mArato grAhakane enA gaMtavya sthAne laI jato hoya. eka vAra cInanA tAinTiMgano paMcotera varSano rikSAcAlaka vAI phanga lI grAhakane potAnA gaMtavya sthAne utArIne pAcho pharato hato. A moTI uMmare Akho divasa paeNDala calAvavAno thAka enA pagamAM varatAto hato. e dhIre dhIre eka pachI eka paeNDala lagAvIne rikSAne AgaLa laI jato hato. evAmAM eNe eka mahilAne joI. e mahilAe kariyANAnI dukAnamAMthI ghaNo mAla-sAmAna kharIdyo hato. e kharIdelo mAla-sAmAna eka dUbaLA-pAtaLA cha varSanA chokarAe upADyo hato. enI zakti karatAM kariyANAnA sAmAnanA thelA ghaNA vajanadAra hatA. e chokaro mAMDa mAMDa e UMcakI zakato hato, paraMtu ATaluM badhuM vajana UMcakyuM hovA chatAM enA caherA para saheje nirAzA ke taMgadilI nahotAM. pagane majabUta rIte khoDIne AgaLa vadhato e chokaro pUrI niSThAthI potAnuM kAma karato hato. rikSAcAlaka vAI phanga lIne A nAnakaDA chokarAmAM rasa paDI gayo. e Ubho rahyo. eNe joyuM ke kariyANAnA A moTA thelA UMcakIne bAjunI paeNDala rikSAmAM mUkyA pachI pelI mahilA rikSAmAM beThI ane vaLI e chokarAne pAcho bolAvIne kahyuM ke, 'jarA A thelA UMcakIne AghA-pAchA kara', tyAre e chokarAnA caherA para saheje aNagamo ke nArAjagI UgyAM nahotAM. majUrInA badalAmAM ene pelI mahilAe thoDuMka paracUraNa ApyuM. e sikkA maLyA eTale AkAza bhaNI najara karI. jANe Izvarano pADa mAnato hoya tema lAgyuM. pachI banyuM evuM ke vAI phanga lI jyAre jyAre samI sAMje potAnA ghara tarapha pAcho pharato hoya, tyAre A chokarAne joto ane e bajAramAMthI mAlasAmAna kharIdatI mahilAono sAmAna peDala rikSAmAM caDAvato. e mAlasAmAna mUkyA pachI maLatA majUrInA thoDA sikkA AnaMdabhera svIkArato ane tamannAnAM tapa * 15

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sikkA hAthamAM AvatAM ja mAthuM UMcuM karIne kazuMka babaDato hoya tema Izvarano AbhAra mAnato. paNa banatuM evuM ke A chokaro sikkA laIne koI rastA paranI reMkaDImAMthI khAvAnuM levAne badale najIkamAM paDelA kacarAnA DhagalAmAM hAtha phaMphosavA lAgato. e DhagalAmAM phaMphosatAM phaMphosatAM breDano gaMdo, nAnakaDo TukaDo maLI jato, to tenA caherA para svarga maLyAnI khuzAlI chavAI jatI. e breDanA nAnA TukaDAne zakya teTalo sApha karIne potAnA mukhamAM mUkato. vAI phanga lIne A dRzya joI ati Azcarya thatuM. e chokarAnA caherA para satata taravaratA AnaMdanI lAgaNIne joI raheto. AvI kAramI garIbI hovA chatAM lAcArInI eka lakIra paNa enA mukha para dekhAtI nahIM. bhAre vajanadAra thelA UMcakatI vakhate paNa eno kAma karavAno utsAha saheje ocho thato nahIM, je divase vAI phanga lIe ene gaMdo, eMTho, koIe khAdhelo nAno beDano TukaDo sApha karIne moMmAM mastIthI khAto joyo, te divase A paMcotera varSanA mAnavIne pahelI vAra garIbInI mojanAM darzana thayAM, paraMtu sAthosAtha A bALaka vize manamAM ghaNA praznArtho jAgyA. enI pAse majUrI karIne maLelA sikkA hovA chatAM e zA mATe A kacarAnA ukaraDAmAMthI AvuM kazuMka zodhato haze? majUrInA mahenatANAmAMthI e ekAda breDa kharIdI zake tema hovA chatAM e zA mATe Avo ukaraDo pheMdato haze ? eka divasa vAI phanga lIe A cha varSanA chokarAne pAse bolAvIne hetathI pUchyuM, 'hasate mukhe tuM kAma kare che, te AMkho bharI bharIne jouM chuM, paNa mane eka vAta samajAtI nathI. majUrInA sikkA maLe che enAthI sArI, tAjI breDa kharIdIne khAvAne badale ukaraDAmAMthI maLelI gaMdI, eMThI breDa zA mATe khAya che?" chokarAe hasIne khaMdhAIthI kahyuM, 'sAheba ! emAM zuM ? garIbane to peTanI Aga bujhAvavAnI hoya che, pachI dukAnamAMthI vecAtI breDa maLe ke ukaraDAmAMthI. vAI phanga lI pAmI gayA ke A chokaro kazuMka chupAve che. emaNe umaLakAthI e chokarAne kahyuM, "cAla, ApaNe sAthe bhojana 16 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI karIe. mArA bhojanamAM tuM bhAga paDAvIza to mane gamaze.' vRddha vAI phanga lI ane A durbaLa dehavALo chokaro eka khUNe beThA ane vAI phanga lIe ene potAnA bhojanamAMthI thoDoka bhAga Apyo. je kaMI thoDuMghaNuM hatuM, te baMnee sAthe maLIne vaheMcIne khAdhuM. A vRddha puruSa ekITase A nAnA bALakane vAnagInA nAnA nAnA TukaDA khAto joI rahyA. emane A bALakanI mAyA lAgI hatI eTale tanathI thAkyA, paNa manathI nahIM pAse jaIne pUchyuM, 'tArAM mAtApitA kyAM rahe che ?' eNe kahyuM, 'mArAM mAtA-pitA roja kacarAmAMthI judI judI cIja - vastuo vaNavAnuM kAma karatAM hatAM, paNa koNa jANe kema eka mahinA agAu teo adRzya thaI gayAM ane te pachI pharIthI kadI emane joyAM nathI.' vAI phanga lI samajI gayA ke eka mahinA pUrve enAM mAtA-pitAnuM mRtyu thayuM che ane eno sahAro chInavAI gayo che. emaNe hetathI pUchyuM, 'paNa dIkarA, tArA gharamAM bIjuM koI to haze ne ? moTo bhAI kharo ?' | 'nA, mAre be nAnI baheno che. emane mATe A sikkAthI huM breDa kharIdIza ane mArI nAnI bahenone khavaDAvIza. mane Ama karavuM bahu game che." vAI phanga lInI AMkhamAMthI AMsu sarI paDyAM. A bALakanI kevI nirAdhAra dazA ! kevI kALI majUrI ane AkarI mahenatane aMte je kaMI paracUraNa sikkA maLe temAMthI kharIdelI breDa paNa potAne mATe kharIde nahIM ! potAne mATe to gaMdakIthI UbharAtI jagAmAM khaDakAyelA kacarAnA DhagamAMthI maLatA melA ane eMThA thoDA breDanA TukaDA ja basa ! snehanA koI adRzya tAra A bALaka sAthe baMdhAI gayA hovAthI paMDala tamannAnAM tapa * 17

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rikSAnA cAlaka vAI phanga lIe kahyuM, 'tuM to ghaNI mahenata kare che. cAla tAre ghera AvuM.' ane A rikSAcAlaka gIca jhUMpaDapaTTInA gaMdA vistAramAM nAnakaDI kholImAM rahetA A bALakanA ghera AvyA, tyAre emanA paga thaMbhI gayA. emaNe joyuM to gharanA khUNAmAM be atyaMta gaMdI ane sAva dUbaLI hADapiMjara jevI chokarIo beThI hatI. eka pAMca varSanI hatI ane bIjI cAra varSanI. emanAM phATelAM kapaDAM ghaNAM gaMdAM hatAM, paNa potAnA moTA bhAIne jotAM tarata doDIne ene vaLagI paDI ane A chokarAe pote kharIdelA breDanA thoDA TukaDA baMne bahenone ApyA.' vAI phanga lI A dRzya stabdha banIne joI rahyA. eka bAju behAla jIvana jIvatAM bALakonI garIbI hatI, to bIjI bAju A traNa nAnAM nAnAM bALuDAMonAM lAgaNIsabhara snehanAM dRzyothI thato AnaMda hato. vAI phanga lIne khyAla AvI gayo ke A bALakone koI sahAro nathI. mAtA-pitA to gumAvyAM hatAM, paraMtu paDozIoe paNa emanI kazI darakAra karI nathI. mAthe nAnakaDI kholInuM chAparuM ne bIjuM kaMI nahIM ! paMcotera varSanA vRddhanuM dila dravI gayuM. manamAM thayuM ke A lAcAra ane nirAdhAra bALakone kaMIka AdhArarUpa banI zakuM to kevuM sAruM ! vaLI ema paNa thayuM ke jyAM mAMDa huM mAruM pUruM karI zakuM chuM, tyAM A bALakone madada kaI rIte karI zakuM? A paMcotera varSanI moTI uMmare AkarI majUrI karIne mAMDa huM mArAM kapaDAM ne bhojana meLavI zakuM chuM, tyAre A bALakone kapaDAM ke bhojana ApavAnI mArI koI guMjAIza che kharI ? koIne madada karavI hoya, to pAse kaMIka to hovuM joIe ne ? gajavAmAM phUTI koDIya na hoya ane dAna ApavAno vicAra kaI rIte thaI zake ? AkhA divasanI majUrI pachI mAMDa peTa pUratuM maLatuM hoya, tyAM bIjAnA peTanI Aga kaI rIte olavI zakAya ? | rikSAcAlakanA manamAM ghaNI mathAmaNa cAlavA lAgI, paNa manamAM eTalI to gAMTha vALI hatI ke game te thAya, topaNa A bALakone sArI jiMdagI to ApavI ja. AthI e traNeya bALakone laIne tAinjiga zaheranA anAthAzramamAM gayA ane AzramanA vyavasthApakane kahyuM, 'A garIba bALakone tame ahIM 18 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI 75 varSanA vRddha baraphavarSAmAM paNa sAikala calAve che. rAkho. enA kharcanI tame phikara karazo nahIM. emanA bhojana ane zikSaNano je kaMI kharca thaze te huM tamane ApIza.' AzramanA saMcAlake A traNe bALakone svIkAryo ane bhojana-nivAsanI sagavaDa ApI. vAI phanga lIe traNa bALakonA bharaNapoSaNanI javAbadArI to mAthe lIdhI, paNa have ene mATenI rakama kyAMthI meLavavI ? manamAM umadA bhAva hoya, to UjaLo paMtha maLI rahe che. bIjAnA duHkhe du:khI thanAranuM sukha kadI ochuM thatuM nathI. A rikSAcAlake manamAM nirdhAra karyo ke atyAre savArathI sAMja sudhI rikSA calAvuM chuM. have vahelI savAre UThIne rikSA calAvIza ane moDe sudhI kAma karato rahIza. paMcotera varSanA vRddha potAnI kamANImAM vRddhi karI ane potAnI AvakamAMthI thoDI rakama potAnA raheThANanA bhADA peTe, savAranA bhojananI be breDa ane sAMjanA khANA mATe judI rAkhato ane bAkInA badhA paisA anAthAzramamAM ApavA lAgyo. eNe kalpanA paNa karI nahotI tema enI Avaka vadhI gaI ane enI icchA phaLIbhUta thaI. enI jiMdagIne eNe navo vaLAMka maLyo. e roja vahelI savAre cha vAgye rikSA laIne kAme nIkaLI javA lAgyo. AkhI jiMdagI paMDala rikSA calAvI hatI eTale ghaNA loko vAI phanma lInI rikSA ja pasaMda karatA. vaLI bIjA rikSAvALA vadhu bhADuM letA, jyAre vAI phanga lI emanI pAsethI bahu ochuM bhADuM leto. zaheranI zerIomAM savArI meLavavA temanInAM tapa : 19.

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mATe ane musApharone emanA sthAne pahoMcADavA mATe e rastA para satata doDato ja jovA maLato. eno deha vRddha hato, paNa dilamAM juvAnanuM kauvata hatuM. pahelAM samI sAMje rikSA calAvavAnuM enuM kAma pUruM karato hato, have rAtanA ATha vAgyA sudhI kAma karavA lAgyo. bIjA rikSAvALAo yuvAna ane zarIre majabUta hatA. vAI phaga lI sukalakaDI zarIra dharAvato bujhurga hato, chatAM e A AkarI mahenatathI saheje thAkato nahIM. enA caherA para sadAya hAsya laherAtuM hatuM. potAnA grAhako sAthe e bhADA aMge agAu kazuM TharAvato nahIM. e bAbatamAM koI carcA ke vAdavivAdamAM Utarato nahIM. teo je bhADuM Ape, te hasate mukhe svIkArI leto. ethIye vadhu ene zraddhA hatI ke mArA grAhako mane yogya bhADuM ja cUkavaze. bhADAnI bAbatamAM kyAM vaLI nyAya ane anyAyano tola karavA nIkaLavuM ! enA dilamAM jevI udAratA hatI, evo ja enA manamAM ahesAsa hato ke mArI hasamukhI sevAnA badalAmAM savArImAM besanArAo vAjabI bhADuM ja cUkavaze. baLabaLatA tApamAM ke kAramI ThaMDImAM e tAinjiga zaheranA mArgo para rikSA kheMcato hoya, enuM zarIra parasevAthI rebajheba thaI gayuM hoya. satata paeNDala mAravAne kAraNe zvAsa kyAreka dhamaNanI mAphaka cAlato hoya, paraMtu game te hoya paNa enA caherA parano ullAsa saheje ocho thato nahIM. A rikSAcAlaka je vistAramAM raheto hato e vistAra tAinjigano sauthI asvaccha evo jhUMpaDapaTTIno gIca vistAra hato. temAM keTalAka rikSAcAlako rahetA hatA ane bIjA rastA para kacaro vINanArA vasatA hatA. - vAI phanga lI mATe enuM jhUMpaDuM mAtra rAtri-nivAsanI jagA ja hatuM. jANe rAte sUvA mATe bhADuM bharato na hoya ? AkhA divasanI majUrI pachI eka jUnuM pAtharaNuM nAkhIne e nirAMte laMbAvato hato. ThaMDI paDe, tyAre lAkaDAnI peTImAMthI phATelo, tUTelo ane sAMdhelo blenkeTa oDhato hato. bhojana mATe patarAnI eka Diza ane pANI pIvA mATe patarAnuM eka kaMna hatuM. jhUMpaDAmAM pharnicara to kyAMthI hoya ? vaLI kholImAM laMbAvyA pachI thoDI jagA vadhatI, to bIjA keTalAya loko ahIM suvA mATe AvatA. jhUMpaDAnA khUNAmAM eka phAnasa paDI rahetuM, je rAte thoDuM ajavALuM veratuM hatuM. AvI 20 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI dazAmAM jIvatA vAI phrenca lInA hRdayamAM vaLI eka navuM svapna jAgyuM. saMsAra ja svapnano ane svapnasevIno che. svapna vagara kyAM kazuM sarajAya che ? lIe vicAra karyo ke hajI vadhu karakasarathI jIvuM to vadhu bALakone madadarUpa banI zakuM. eNe garIba ane anAtha bALako mATe potAnI jAta nicovI nAkhI hatI, paraMtu have e potAnI jAta vize vicAravA lAgyo ! vicAryuM ke potAnI pAse to kapaDAM ane bhojana che, paNa pelAM anAtha I. 2005mAM avasAna samaye vAI bALako pAse nathI kapaDAM ke nathI pha lI khAvAnI breDa ! e kaI rIte zikSaNa pAmI zake ? koNa ene madadarUpa banI zake ? enI AMkhomAM tamannAnuM teja hatuM. have e zarTa ke penTa phATI jAya, to kADhI nAkhavAne badale ene sAMdhIne paheravA lAgyo. vaLI e phATe, to pharI pharI sAMdhavA lAgyo. paristhiti evI AvI ke paisA bacAvavAnI raDhamAM eNe bhojanamAM karakasara karavA mAMDI. eno AhAra sAva sAdo hato. bhojanamAM ThaMDuM pANI ane mAtra breDa. bahu bahu to enI sAthe thoDo sosa leto. ema thayuM ke potAne AvuM tAjuM khAvA maLe che ane bIjAM keTalAMya bALakone bhUkhe maravAne vAMke jIvavuM paDe che. AthI eNe potAnuM tAjuM bhojana garIbone ApavA mAMDyuM ane pote koIe pheMkI dIdhelo khorAka khAvA lAgyo. emanA kuTuMbanA sabhyo lInI A Adata para gusse thatA hatA, paraMtu enI kazIya asara vAI phanga lI para thatI nahotI. koIka vAra e rastAmAM aDadho khAdhelo kaoNna paDyo hoya to te laI letA ane tenAthI potAnuM peTa tamannAnAM tapa * 21

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bharatA. emanAM saMtAno vAI phanga lI para khUba akaLAtAM ane kahetAM ke AvuM eThuM khAvAnI zI jarUra che ? tyAre A bujhurga mAnavI potAnAM saMtAnone kaheto, 'huM to gaLyo kaoNna khAuM chuM. kevo poco che ! khAvAmAM paNa kazI takalIpha paDatI nathI. juo, A koI kheDUtanI AkarI mahenatanuM pariNAma haze. loko ene A rIte pheMkI daIne bagADa kare che, to huM e pheMkI dIdhelA kaoNnane khAIne bagADa ocho karuM chuM. kaho, A bagADa ghaTADavAno kAragata upAya nathI ?' A adanA mAnavInAM caMpala, vastro ke IMTano kyAreya meLa maLato nahIM. enA dedAra sAva bhikhArI jevA lAgatA ! enA baMne bUTa taddana alaga sAijha ane raMganA hoya, aMdaranAM mojAMya judAM hoya, haMTa sahejeya 'phiTa' thatI na hoya. AnuM kAraNa e ke e bIjAe tyajI dIdhelAM kapaDAM, bUTa ane mojAMno upayoga karato hato. emanAM saMtAno kyAreka emane AhAra ane pINAMnI bAbatamAM cIkAzabharI bacata nahIM karavAnuM samajAvatAM, paNa emanI koI vAta vAI phanga lI kAne dharato nahIM. koIka vAra emanA putro emane mATe bajAramAMthI navAM vastro laI AvatA, to A buDho krodhAyamAna thaI jato. vastro ane khorAkamAMthI je paisA bacatA, te bAjumAM AvelI zALAnA jarUriyAtamaMda vidyArthIone ApI Avato hato. anAtha ane nirAdhAra vidyArthIonA ujjavaLa bhaviSya mATe potAnA gajA uparAMtanI sahAya karato. jema koI zikSaNavid vidyArthInA abhyAsa mATe potAnuM jIvana samarpaNa kare, e ja rIte vAI phanga lIe rakhaDatAM anAtha bALako ane Arthika majabUrI dharAvatAM bALakonA abhyAsamAM madadarUpa thavA mATe jAta samarpI hatI. potAnI e tamannAne AkhI jiMdagI vaLagI rahyo ane ene mATe jAta ghasatAM ene ghaNo AnaMda thato hato. gaNatarI karIe to A rikSAcAlake paMDala rikSA calAvIne pRthvInI AsapAsa aDhAra vakhata AMTA mAryA haze, paNa A uMmare, ATalI AkarI mahenata karatA hovA chatAM badalAnI koI apekSA nahIM. jyAre vidyArthIone madada kare, tyAre emane emanAM nAma sudhdhAM pUche nahIM. eNe traNasothI vadhu bALakone emano abhyAsa pUro karavA mATe emanI nizALanI phI cUkavI ane enI sAthosAtha emanA jIvananirvAha mATeno kharca pUrI pADyo. sADA traNa lAkha yenanI madada karyAnI to jANa maLI, paraMtu kharekhara koI jANatuM nathI ke keTalA besahArA ane behAla vidyArthIone eNe AvI gupta madada karI haze ? paMdara varSa sudhI lInI A zikSaNasevA cAlu rahI. vAI phA lI nevuM varSanI uMmare pahoMcyo. have e paMDala rikSA calAvI zakato nahIM, paNa eTale jhUMpaDAmAM paga vALIne ke bichAnAmAM sUIne bAkInuM jIvana vitAvavuM ene maMjUra na hatuM. eNe 193 2005 navI nokarI svIkArI. e sTezana vidyArthIoe sarjeluM vAI phanga lInuM para pArka karelI moTaronuM dhyAna smAraka rAkhato hato ane emAMthI je pAMcaso yena bacAvyA, te paNa A dilAvara bujhurge dAnamAM ApI dIdhA. potAnA cokhkhA DabbAmAM sAcavI rAkhelI e pAMcaso yenanI AmadanI eNe 'yAo hu' zALAmAM arpaNa karI. A zALA anAthAlaya calAvatI hatI. jyAre eNe A rakama arpaNa karI, tyAre dardabharyA gherA avAje kahyuM.. 'have huM rikSA calAvavA mATe khuba gharaDo thaI gayo chuM. have huM mArA dAnano pravAha cAlu rAkhI zakato nathI, enuM mane pArAvAra du:kha che. kadAca A dAna e mAruM chelluM dAna haze.' A vacano bolatI vakhate bhAvavibhora banelA lInA gaLAmAM DUmo bharAI gayo. enI vAta sAMbhaLanArA zALAnA zikSakonI AMkhamAM AMsu AvyAM. 2005nA me mahinAmAM ene phephasAMnuM kensara thayuM ane e varSe 23 sapTembare enuM avasAna thayuM. enI daphanavidhi vakhate aneka seMkaDo lokoe 22 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI tamannAnAM tapa * 23

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hAjarI ApI hatI. enAM kuTuMbIjano ane sagAM-vahAlAMo sAthe A rikSAcAlakane koI vizeSa saMbaMdha ke saMparka nahoto. loko eTaluM jotA ke e koI eka jagAethI vahelI savAre peDala rikSA laIne nIkaLe che, bAkI enAM koI nAma-ThAmanI khabara nahotI, paNa jIvana pratyenI enI UjaLI AzA, paoNjhiTiva abhigama ane garIbI vacce dAkhavelI amIrI mATe sahu ene cAhatA hatA. e madada karato, tyAre enI AMkhamAM dhyeyasiddhinI camaka AvatI hatI. A hADapiMjara jevA eka adanA mAnavIe kAramI garIbI vacce niHsvArtha jussA ane hRdayanA premathI garIbonI sevA karI ane Aje e umadA mAnavI eNe enI sahAya meLavanArA vidyArthIonA hRdayamAM jIvaMta che. lInA avasAna pachI eNe keTalA vidyArthIone sahAya karI haze, eno aMdAja meLavavA prayatna thayo, tyAre thoDAMka bALako pAse vAI phanga lI sAtheno phoTo maLyo ke jene emaNe madada karI hatI. potAnA A kAryanI pAchaLa vAI phanga lInI apekSA zI hatI ? zA mATe pote garIbI vahorIne garIbone zikSaNa ApavA mATe prayatna karato hato ? A aMge koI pUchatuM ke e je bALakone madada kare che, temanI pAsethI koI apekSA rAkhe che kharo ? tyAre lI hasate mukhe eTaluM kaheto, 'huM icchu chuM ke teo abhyAsa karavA mATe satata mahenata kare, sArI nokarI meLave ane adanA nAgarika banIne dezane kazuMka pAchuM vALe.' a 24 * mATIe ghaDavAM mAnavI 3 jila phipsa prANIpremanI balivedI para videzanI dharatI para kevA avanavA anubhavo thatA hoya che ! ApaNI dhAraNA hoya ke prANInAM cAhako ke pUjako bhAratabhUmimAM ja maLe, paNa videzanI dharatI para aghatana pAMjarApoLa jovA maLe ane prANI kAje gItAbahena rAMbhiyAnI mAphaka jAna nyochAvara karanArAya maLe ! abola prANInI cIsa AkhI duniyAnA saMvedanazIla mAnavIonA dilamAM vedanA jagAvatI hoya che. e cIsa emanA aMtarane cIratI hoya che. prANInA jIvane thatuM du:kha emano jIva svayaM anubhavato hoya che ane AvAM prANInA du:khane dUra karavA mATe teo prANIo para thatA atyAcArono Akaro virodha kare che, posTara-jhuMbeza calAve che, dharaNAM ke satyAgraha paNa Adare ane vakhata Avye potAnA prANanI paNa prANIpremanI balivedI para Ahuti Ape.

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e samaye huM iMglenDanI saphara kheDato hato. devaLothI suzobhita kovenTrI zaheramAM ghUmI rahyo hato. evAmAM enA havAI mathake banelI eka ghaTanAe mAruM haiyuM valovI nAkhyuM. AkhA dezamAMthI eka avAja UDyo. nava varSano putra dharAvatI tetrIsa varSanI bhAvanAzIla ane taravaratI yuvatI jila phimsa koI rASTranA svAtaMtra mATe nahIM, koI nArI svAtaMtrya mATe nahIM, koI zveta ke azveta vaccenA raMgabhedanAM baMdhano toDavA mATe nahIM, balka mUMgA, abola ane nirdoSa pazuone mATe sAme cAlIne zahAdatane vahoranArI briTananI pahelI nArI banI. mAnavI dvArA rahesAtAM, pisAtAM ane ArogAtAM muMgA prANIonI cIsa sAme jila phise jehAda pokArI hatI. ene jANa thaI ke kovenTrInA havAI mathakethI bIjA yuropIya dezomAM prANIonI nikAsa thaI rahI che. e dezo A gerakAyade maLelA prANIonAM baccAMne katalakhAnAmAM dhakelIne AhAra meLave che. kovenTrIthI prANIonI nikAsa karavA mATe krisTophara bereTa-jolI nAmanI vyaktie 'phiniksa eviezana' nAmanI kaMpanI dvArA vimAno pUrAM pADyAM hatAM. prANIonA adhikAro ane svAtaMtra mATe laData ApatA briTananA loko e mAtra prANIpremanI vAto karIne, jIvadayAne nAme AMsu sArIne, thoDuM dAna lakhAvIne ke kAyadAnI kAryavAhI karIne kAma karavAmAM mAnatA nathI. teo kahe che ke jagatane bacAvavuM haze, to prANIone koI paNa bhoge bacAvavAM paDaze. dara vIsa miniTe dharatI parathI pazu ke pakSInI eka jAti sadAne mATe lupta thaI rahI che. pahelAM dasa hajAra varSe prANI astitva lupta thavAnI ghaTanA banatI, te Aje mAtra dara vIsa miniTe thAya che. mAnavInI muMgA pazuo pratyenI krUratAe tamAma hada vaTAvI dIdhI che ! pazuone prema ApavAne badale e phAMsI Ape che ane te paNa potAnA bhojanane mATe ! Ane kAraNe 'globala vaoNrmiMga' vadhe ane AsapAsanuM paryAvaraNa paNa dUSita thAya, e to judI vAta. paNa mAnavajAta e jANatI nathI ke prANI mAnavI vinA jIvI zake che, paNa prANIvihIna sRSTi banaze, to mAnavI tabAha thaI jaze. enuM khudanuM astitva bhUMsAI jaze, AthI ja 'vizvavAtsalyane kAraNe keTalAka marajIvAoe prANIonA adhikAro mATe jaMga Adaryo. prANIo para mAnavI dvArA thatA jila phisa : nava varSanA putra luka sAthe atyAcAra sAme lAlabattI dharI. nirdayatAthI thatI prANIonI katalane aTakAvavA motane muThThImAM rAkhIne marajIvAoe manasUbo ghaDyo ke have AkarAM pagalAM bharIzuM, to ja A vepAra aTakaze. A prANIpremIone have sUtro ke samajAvaTamAM zraddhA rahI nathI. teo jAnanA jokhame pracaMDa virodha karIne prANI rakSA mATe nIkaLyA, AthI to prANIpremI dekhAvakAro vimAnI kaMpanInA mAlika krisTopharane ghera pahoMcI gayA ane cokI karatA polIsane bAjue haTAvIne aDhI lAkha pAunDanA bhavya makAnamAM rahetA krisTopharanA baMgalAnAM bArIbAraNAM toDI nAkhyAM. ema karatAM ya enI sAna ThekANe Ave ! vimAna dvArA prANIonI gerakAyade nikAsa para najara rAkhavA prANI cAhakoe eraporTa para pahero goThavyo. chellA keTalAka mahinAothI kovenTrI zaheranA havAI mathaka para prANIpremIo satata cAMpatI najara nAkhatA hatA. kAramI ThaMDInI paravA karyA vinA prANIcAhako sAvadha banIne UbhA rahetA hatA. jila phisa kyAreka potAnI mAtA ke bahenane laIne A TukaDImAM sAmela thaI 26 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI prANIpremanI balivedI para * 27,

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JILL PHIPPS DIED FIGHTING FOR ANIMAL LIBERATION HER FIGHT LIVES ON jatI, to kyAreka enA nava varSanA putra lukane laIne hAjara thaI jatI. pote je mAne che tene mATe mAthuM ApanArAM A yuvAno hatAM. evAmAM banyuM evuM ke nAnAM vAcharaDAMone levA briTana AveluM cArTara plena tUTI gayuM. emAM beThelA pAMca mANaso mRtyu pAmyA ane A ghaTanAne kAraNe jila phise vimAnanA mAlika krisTophara bereTa jolI sAme potAno virodha vadhu bulaMda karyo. eNe kahyuM ke jo krisTophara bereTa jolIe potAnI lohiyALa kamANInI duHdakhya lAlasA para aMkuza rAkhyo hota ane jIvatAM prANIonI AvI nikAsa na karato hota, to kovenTrImAM AvuM cArTara plena AvyuM na hota ane pAMca mAnavIonA prANa khovAnI AvI durghaTanA sarjAI na hota ? jila phise spaSTa kahyuM ke ene akasmAtamAM mRta vyaktio mATe lezamAtra sahAnubhUti nathI, kAraNa ke e paNa kaMpanInA mAlika jeTalA ja gunegAra gaNAya. jila mAtra Akroza vyakta karIne besI na rahI, paNa bIje divase moTuM benara laIne eraporTa para UbhI rahI. e benaramAM lakhyuM hatuM, 'amAre joIe che jIvato yA marelo krisTophara bereTa jolI.' pachInA divase prANIonA hakka mATe laDatA potAnA cotrIsa sAthIo sAthe mAyALu ane sohAmaNI jila hAjara thaI. nAnAM prANIone A rIte katalakhAne dhakelavAmAM Ave tenAthI jilane pArAvAra vedanA thatI. e kahetI ke "jema nAnAM bALakone mAravAmAM Ave te guno che, te ja rIte nirdoSa ane akalaMkita prANIone haNavAM, te niSpApa zizune mAravA jevuM gaNAya.' e gojhArA divase iMglenDanA kovenTrI zaheramAM kaDakaDatI ThaMDI paDatI hatI. prANI hakkonAM pAMtrIsa TekedAro eraporTanA sAmAna laI javAnA mArga para cAMpatI najara rAkhIne beThAM hatAM. jila phipsa potAnA sAthIo sAthe AnaMdabhera vAto karatI hatI ane evAmAM eNe dUrathI dhasamasatI Traka AvatI joI. tarata ja jilanuM rUpa badalAI gayuM. agAu AvI rIte prANIone pUrIne purajhaDape doDatI TrakonI vacce jila hiMmatabhera UbhI rahI hatI ane emane aTakAvyA hatA. prANIone choDAvavA mATe Traka calAvanArAone majabUra karyA hatA. jevI Traka dekhAI ke jilanA eka mitranA kahevA mujaba jila jIvadayApremI jila phisanI aMtimavidhinA sthaLe mRtyulekha aganagoLo' banI gaI. e doDI, baMne hAtha khullA rAkhIne dhasamasatI Traka sAme doDI. enA caherA para koI bhaya nahoto. manamAM koI Dara nahoto. Traka heThaLa kacaDAI jaze to zuM thaze, evI koI phikara nahotI. Traka dhasamasatI sAva sAme AvI. jila saheje bAju mAM khasI nahIM, be hAtha khullA rAkhIne rastA para Trakane aTakAvatI hatI. paNa A zuM ? TrakanI gati saheje ochI thaI nahIM ke bAjumAM phaTAI nahIM. dUra Ubhelo polIsa bUmo pADato doDI Avyo, paNa DrAivare kazuM ya gaNakAryA vinA sAme Traka calAvI. jilanA zarIra para TrakanAM paiDAM pharI vaLyAM. AkhuM zarIra chuMdAI gayuM. sAthe AvelI jilanI bahene joyuM ke jila dharatI para chuMdAIne paDI che. lohInuM khAbociyuM bharAI gayuM. jilanA sAthI jasTina TImasane A samAcAra sAMbhaLyA tyAre e kovenTrImAM prANIsahAyaka vAnanuM riperiMga karato hato. eNe kahyuM, "ghaNI vAra hetunI siddhi mATe AkarAM pagalAM levAM paDe che. jo jilanuM mRtyu prANIonI katala aTakAvanAruM banaze, to enA mRtyuthI sauthI AnaMda pAmanAra vyakti jila haze.' | jilanA pitAne putrInA motano atyaMta AghAta thayo ane emaNe kahyuM ke 'jilane mATe jIvavAno artha evo eno nava varSano bALaka hato, pachI e zA mATe sAme cAlIne mRtyune bheTavA gaI ?' jilanI kurabAnI pahelAM ziyALiyAMonA zikAra karavA mATe nIkaLatA 28 * mATIe ghaDacAM mAnavI prANIpremanI balivedI para * 19

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zokhInone aTakAvavA jatAM be yuvAniyAoe prANa gumAvyA hatA, paraMtu jene sahu 'sohAmaNI vahAlasoyI mAtA' kahetA hatA evI madhyama varganI jila phisanI kurabAnIe eka judI ja havA sarjI. briTananI pArlAmenTamAM A muddo uThAvavAmAM Avyo. sahunI naja2 jilanA jIvana para gaI. - posTamaeNnanI A putrI abhyAsamAM atyaMta tejasvI hatI ane e AsAnIthI yunivarsiTImAM abhyAsa arthe gaI hota. paNa ene naukAdaLanA keDeTa banavAnI icchA hatI. pariNAme eNe abhyAsa choDyo. samaya jatAM enA pitA boba phisananI jema posTa-khAtAnI kAmagIrI svIkArI, paraMtu bALapaNathI ja jilane prANIo tarapha apAra mamatA hatI. zerImAMthI galUDiyAMone lAvIne e jALavatI hatI. jilanI mAtA nensI paNa eka samaye prANIone mArIne enI ruvAMTIno upayoga karanAra phara-udyoga sAme medAne paDI hatI. enI mAtA nensI pharanI nikAsa karatAM khetaro sAme virodhano moraco laIne jatI, tyAre nAnakaDI jilane paNa sAthe laI jatI hatI. kovenTrImAM AvuM 'phara-phArma' ane 'phara-zopa' baMne A moracAnI jehAdane pariNAme baMdha thayAM. jilanI mAtA nensI zAkAhArI banI ane sAthosAtha enA AkhA kuTuMbane zAkAhArI banAvyuM. e pachI prANIo para gupta rIte TesTa karatI phaeNkTarIomAM chApo lagAvatI TukaDImAM jila sAmela thaI ane mUMgAM prANIo mATenI enI jehAda vadhu prabaLa banI. | jilanI aMtima kriyA mAtra kuTuMbanAM sabhyo pUratI ja maryAdita rAkhavAmAM AvI hatI, tema chatAM kovenTrInA e ketheDralamAM eka hajAra jeTalAM zokagrasta loko ekatrita thayAM hatAM. A samaye 'saba hyumansa' dvArA jila phisanuM priya gIta vAgatuM hatuM, jenI AraMbhanI paMktio hatI, 'cAlo, abhaya banIne jIvana jIvIe" enI chellI paMkti e hatI ke 'ApaNe karamAIe, te pahelAM ApaNI vAta kahetAM jaIe.' A samaye vikhyAta phreMca abhinetrI ane prANIhakko mATe jehAda calAvanArI briTi bArDe paNa zokAturomAM sAmela thaI hatI ane eNe kahyuM, 'huM jila phisane zraddhAMjali ApavA AvI chuM. e addabhuta chokarI hatI ane hakIkatamAM mAnavInA jIvana jeTaluM ja prANIonuM jIvana mahattvanuM che.' iMglenDamAMthI phipsane zraddhAMjali ApavA sahu AvyAM hatAM ane vAgha, mAnavI, nAnAM prANIonI vacce IsunI chabI dharAvatI mahAna TepesTrI nIce jilanI aMtima yAtrA yojAI. enA sAthIdAra jasTina Timsane kahyuM ke jila jevI niHsvArtha vyakti eNe jagatamAM joI nathI. e pRthvI, sUrya ane dharatI paranAM tamAma prANIone cAhatI hatI ane enI saMbhALa mATe potAne javAbadAra mAnatI hatI. aMtimavidhimAM briTananA bhUtapUrva saMrakSaNa pradhAna elana klArka paNa hAjara rahyA hatA ane ji la phisanA sAthIoe jila phisane bhAvabhInI vidAya ApI. vAcharaDAMnuM citra dharAvatA puSpagucchathI ene aMjali ApI. eka yugala prANI jagatanI sahAnubhUti pragaTa karavA mATe potAnA be zvAnone laIne AvyuM. e divase prANIothI bharelI koI Traka doDI nahIM, kAraNa ke kovenTrI jatAM vimAno rada karavAmAM AvyAM hatAM. briTananA akhabAroe prANImukti mATe zahAdata vahoranArI jila phisanI aMtima yAtrAne pahele pAne sacitra rIte camakAvI daIne briTanamAM jAgelI zAkAhAra ane prANI adhikAranI jehAdano mArmika ane sacoTa saMketa Apyo ! 30 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI prANIpremanI balivedI para * 31

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lokhaMDI dAdAjI 1951nI bIjI julAI e svIDananuM sTokahAma zahe2. eka moTI spardhAnI taiyArIthI dhamadhamatuM hatuM. dezanA khUNekhUNAmAMthI 2matavIro A zaheramAM UtarI AvyA. sahu potAnI tAkAta batAvavA thanaganatA hatA. A kaMI jevItevI spardhA na hatI. pUrA eka hajAra mAIlanI sAikala-doDa hatI. AmAM vijetA bananArane rASTravyApI sanmAna maLatuM. dezanA kAbela ramatavIra tarIke badhe gaurava thatuM. | doDha hajAra jeTalA ramatazokhIno A spardhAmAM bhAga levA AvyA. sahune pharajiyAta meDikala tapAsamAMthI pasAra thavuM paDatuM. moTA bhAganA harIpho AvI lAMbI spardhA mATe yogya puravAra thayA nahIM. doDha hajAra harIphomAMthI mAtra pacAsa harIpho ja pasaMda thayA. e badhA yuvAna, kasAyelA gussava hakanasola ane tAlImabAja ramatavIro hatA. spardhAmAM UtaravA AvelA harIphonI traNa DaoNkTaro zArIrika tapAsa laI rahyA hatA. A samaye emanA oraDAmAM eka vRddha dAkhala thayo. enA moM para karacalI hatI. enI lAMbI dADhI rUnI dhoLI pUNI jevI sapheda lAgatI hatI. enI umara sittera varSa jeTalI jaNAtI hatI. DaoNkTaro samajyA ke A koI ajANyo vRddha ahIM AvI caDyo lAge che. emaNe namratAthI pUchavuM, "Apa zA mATe ahIM padhAryA cho ?' - pelA vRddhe kahyuM, "hajAra mAIlanI sAikala spardhAmAM bhAga levA." eka DaoNkTare pUchayuM, "zuM tamAro koI dIkaro A spardhAmAM bhAga levA Avyo sAikala spardhAmAM bhAga letA che ?'' gusTAva hakanasola vRddha javAba Apyo, "are, mAro koI dIkaro nahIM, paNa huM pote hajAra mAIlanI sAikala-spardhAmAM bhAga levA Avyo chuM." "are, dAdAjI tame ?" eka DaoNkTara AzcaryathI bolI UThyA, "tame AvI lAMbI spardhAmAM kevI rIte bhAga laI zakazo ?" bIjA DaoNkTare kahyuM, "dAdA, ApanuM dimAga to ThekANe che ne ?" trIjA DaoNkTara bolyA, "tamArA jevA sittera varSanA buDhaDhAnuM AmAM kAma nahIM. dAdAjI, tame to nirAMte ghera jaI ArAmakhurazImAM besIne dIkarAnA dIkarAne vArtA kaho !'' vRddha gussava hakanasola bolyA, "mApha karajo sAheba, mArI uMmara sittera varSanI nathI, paNa chAsaTha varSanI che." are, chAsaTha to chAsaTha. chAsaTha eTale sitteramAM cAra ja ochAM ne ? ahIM to doDha hajAramAMthI mAtra pacAsa khelADIone ja AvI lAMbI sAikalaspardhA mATe pasaMda karyA che. AmAM eka paNa khelADInI uMmara cAlIsa varSathI vadhu nathI. AvI kaDaka tapAsamAM tamArA jevA chAsaTha varSanAne kevI rIte bhAga levA lokhaMDI dAdAjI * 33

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devAya ? A sAikala-doDa e kaMI baccAno khela nathI, samajyA ne ?" vRddha gussAve jarA makkama avAje kahyuM, "Apane kAma sAthe nisabata che. ke uMmara sAthe ? moTA bhAganA loko trIsa varSe je TalA tAkAtavALA hotA nathI, teTalI tAkAta huM A uMmare paNa dharAvuM chuM. bAkI zuM ? sAheba, mAnavInI tAkAta ane tamannA para uMmara gaNAya, eNe keTalAM varSo gALyAM te para nahIM. mArA dilano avAja che. huM bhAga laIne ja jaMpIza ! sAheba, huM to chAsaTha varSano yuvAna chuM, yuvAna !" eka dAktare emane pUchayuM, "paNa tame hAparADAthI yastAda sudhInI ATalI lAMbI sAikala-doDamAM phAvazo kharA?" | gucave javAba Apyo, "oha ! emAM zuM sAheba ! AkhI jiMdagI to meM basa calAvavAno dhaMdho karyo, paNa pAMca varSa pahelAM ja sAikala kharIdI. pachI to sAikala sAthe evI dostI thaI ke khaTAro calAvavAnuM ja bhUlI gayo. pAMca varSamAM to sAikala para dezanA khUNe khUNe ghUmI vaLyo. eka vAra to mArA nivAsasthAna gaMtophatAthI lepalaeNnDanA AsTika sarkala sudhInuM traNa hajAra mAIla lAMbuM cakkara lagAvI Avyo chuM. 1927mAM 42 varSanI vaye to uttarI svIDananA pahADo para sAikalathI vijayayAtrA karI cUkyo chuM, sAheba, basa, tame mane A spardhAmAM bhAga levAnI rajA Apo. pachI dhoLI dADhIvALA A yuvAna gusTAvanI tAkAta joIne tame ja daMga thaI ja zo.' Ama kahIne gAve potAnI dhoLI dADhI para hAtha pheravyo. dAktarone A buDhAnI baDAza para manomana hasavuM AvyuM. spardhAno samaya thavA Avyo hato. gusTAvanA Agrahane joIne ene spardhaka tarIke nahIM, paNa bhAga levAnI maMjUrI ApI, paraMtu A DaoNkTaro dhAratA hatA ke juvAniyAnA jora AgaLa A vRddha kyAM TakavAno che ? bhale, bhAga levo hoya to le, paNa thoDA mAIla jatAM paganuM jora khUTI jaze ane sAikala mUkIne rastAnI bAjue lamaNe hAtha daIne besI jaze ! eka hajAra mAIlanI sAikala-doDanA AraMbhanI nizAnI thaI. seMkaDo svIDanavAsIoe harIphone umaLakAbhera vadhAvI lIdhA. yuvAna ane majabUta sAIkalasavAro pUrA jozathI paeNDala mArIne AgaLa dhapavA lAgyA. paraMtu kharekharo gaganabhedI harSanAda to eka miniTa pachI thayo. vayovRddha gustAva 34 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI medAna para AvyA. AraMbhanI rekhA parathI jhaDapathI sAikala doDAvI. emAMya A chAsaTha varSanA gussAva 'leDIjha-sAIkala" laIne spardhAmAM UtaryA hatA. potAnA zarTa para spardhaka tarIke 'jhIro naMbara' lakhyo hato. lokoe dhoLI dADhIvALA mAnavInA khamIrane joIne harSadhvani ryo. gusTAvanI jhaDapa bIjA taravariyA yuvAno jeTalI na hatI, paraMtu e ekadhArI jhaDape sAikala calAvatA hatA. Akho divasa ekasarakhI jhaDapa jALavI rAkhatA gusTAve pacAsa mAIla pUrA karyA, tyAre emanA bIjA harIpho sATha mAIla pasAra karI cUkyA hatA ! badhAne thayuM ke hajI AraMbhamAM ja dasa bALakonA pitA gussAva dasa mAIla pAchaLa paDI gayA, to pachI emanuM zuM thaze? sAikala-spardhAnA harIpho rAtre visAmo laIne savAre AgaLa vadhatA. jyAre gusTAva pAse to visAmAnI vAta ja nahIM. UMghanI koI ciMtA nahIM. satata traNa divasa sudhI maTakuM mAryA vinA sAikala calAvatA rahyA, khUba thAka lAge tyAre mAMDa ekAda kalAka ArAma le. pharI pAchA AgaLa vadhavA taiyAra. AthI ekadhArI jhaDape jatA gussAve traNaso mAIlanuM aMtara kApyuM, tyAre emanA harIpho emanAthI vIsa mAIla pAchaLa hatA. paNa bicArA buDhA gusTAvanI koNa paravA kare? sahune ema ke saheja jhaDape sAikala calAvIzuM eTale gharaDA gusTAva kyAMya pAchaLa guma thaI jaze. gusTAvanA harIpho Avo vicAra kare, gusTAva to kazuMya vicAryA vinA paeNDala lagAvyuM jatA, sAikala AgaLa dhapAvya jatA. yuvAna harIpho abhimAnanA toramAM rahyA, gurava satata AgaLa vadhatA rahyA. A spardhAnAM traNa divasa ane traNa rAta pUrAM thayAM, tyAre AkhI paristhiti badalAI cUkI hatI. Akhoya svIDana deza A vayovRddhanI sAikaladoDane Azcarya, utsAha ane romAMcathI nihALato hato. koI juvAna harIphone yAda paNa karatuM na hatuM. emaNe keTaluM aMtara kApyuM che te jANavAnI paravAya na hatI. traNa divasa bAda gusTAva potAnA tamAma harIpho karatAM ekaso vIsa mAIla AgaLa hato. ATalA samaya daramiyAna eNe mAtra pAMca kalAkanI UMgha lIdhI hatI. Akho deza gussavanA samAcAra jANavA Atura banI gayo. sAikala spardhA sAmAnya banI gaI, badhe gusTAvanI ja vAto thaI rahI. vartamAnapatronA lokhaMDI dAdAjI * 35

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pahelA pAne enI tasavIro pragaTa thavA mAMDI. enI jIvanakathA rajU thavA mAMDI. gusTAva rAtorAta samagra rASTranI sanmAnya vyakti banI gayo. je je gAmaDAM ane zaheromAMthI dAdAjI pasAra thatA, tyAM loko emane harSanA pokArothI vadhAvatA. rastAnI baMne bAju emane nihALavA mATe moTI katAro jAmatI. sahu pITha thAbaDIne AvA bhagIratha prayatna mATe guruvane zAbAzI ApatA. koI koI to gherathI mIThuM majAnuM bhojana banAvI lAvatA. A vayovRddha dAdAjIne jamADIne potAnI jAtane dhanya mAnatA. akhabAranA khabarapatrIo A vRddhanI mulAkAta levA mATe paDApaDI karavA lAgyA. emanI jIvanakathA ane saphara kathA judA judA rUpe vartamAnapatromAM ane Telivijhana para 2jU thavA lAgI. 'lokhaMDI dAdAjI" jevAM keTalAMya upanAma maLyAM. vadhu eka rAta ane eka divasa pasAra thayo. A covIsa kalAka daramiyAna gusTAve mAtra be kalAka ja ArAma karyo. bAvIsa kalAka to satata sAikala calAvI. potAnA bIjA harIpho karatAM gusTava doDhasothIya vadhu mAIla AgaLa hatA. spardhAno aMta najIka Avato hato. chAsaTha varSanA gustAva para thAkanI asara thavA lAgI hatI. agAu eNe lAMbI sAikala-saphara kheDI hatI, paraMtu e to moja khAtara kheDelI sAikala-saphara hatI. emAM to nirAMte ArAma karIne AgaLa vadhAya. paraMtu A to rasAkasIno khela hato. emAM lAMbo samaya ArAma kare te pAlave tema na hatuM. spardhAno pAMcamo divasa zarU thayo. lokoe joyuM ke dAdAjI siddhinI najIka AvI gayA che, paraMtu khUba thAkI gayA che. lokoe emanI sAthe ja sAikala para caDIne sAtha ApavAnuM zarU karyuM, pokAro karIne protsAhita karavA lAgyA. dAdAjI AgaLa dhape jatA hatA. mAtra thoDAka ja mAIla bAkI rahyA. gurUva thAkathI bhAMgI paDyA. sAikala parathI nIce UtaryA. jamIna para besI gayA. badhAne thayuM ke have to dAdAjI eTalA to thAkI gayA che ke eka paeNDala paNa nahIM lagAvI zake ! paraMtu gustAvanA gharaDA dehamAM juvAnano jusso vasato hato. zarIra thAkyuM hatuM, paNa mana to tAjuMmAzuM hatuM. mana eTalA utsAhathI AgaLa cAle, ke bicArA tanane pAchaLa pAchaLa dorAvuM paDe ! emaNe sAikaladoDanI spardhAno pozAka utArI nAkhyo. TUMkI kALI caDDI ane sapheda khamIsa paheryuM. pharI sAikala para beThA ane jozabhera haMkArI mUkI. vaNathaMbhI lAMbI saphara vijayanI rekhAne pahoMcavA mATe thoDAka ja mAIla pasAra karavAnA bAkI hatA. yastAda zaheramAM vijayanI rekhA hatI. mAtra zaheranA loko ja nahIM, paraMtu svIDananA dakSiNa bhAgamAMthI TheraTherathI loko dAdAjIne vadhAvavA mATe vijayarekhA pAse UbhA hatA. dAdAjI mastAda zaheramAM pravezyA ke emane sAikala para besIne sAtha ApatA lokoe gIto gAIne potAno AnaMda vyakta karyo. tasavIro kheMcAvA lAgI. aMtima rekhAnI najIka AvatAM dAdAjIne vadhAvatAM phUlothI Akho rasto chavAI gayo. dAdAjI gussAva e ja gatithI sAikala doDAvI rahyA hatA. vijayarekhAthI ardhA mAIla dUra hatA ane emanI sAikalamAM pazcara paDyuM. kinAre AveluM nAva DUbavA lAgyuM ! gussAva sAikala parathI nIce UtaryA. Thapako ApatA hoya tema paMkacara paDelA pAchaLanA thayarane joyuM. jANe ema na kahetA hoya ke navaso ne navvANuM mAIla sudhI sAtha ApanArA teM aDadhA mAIla mATe AvuM zuM kAma karyuM? emaNe sAme najara karI to vijayarekhA najIka hatI. vastAdanA nagarapati tathA anya adhikArIo emane satkAravA Atura hatA. vijayane vadhAvanAruM baeNnDa saMbhaLAtuM hatuM. dAdAjIne thayuM ke have paMkacara barAbara karavuM yogya na gaNAya. e to pharI sAikala para kUdako lagAvIne beThA ane lokhaMDI dAdAjI * 37 36 * mATIe ghaDacAM mAnavI

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koIka divasa' - vijetA gusTAva hakanasola sAikala haMkArI dIdhI. dAdAjI paMkacaravALI sAikala sAthe vijayarekhAne pAra karI gayA. rainAnaMdI presa koe gaganabhedI avAjothI emane vadhAvI lIdhA. lokoe eTalA phUlahAra karyA ke AkhA dAdAjI DhaMkAI gayA. 9 divasa, 14 kalAka ane 20 miniTa sudhI sAikala calAvIne, eka hajAra mAilanuM aMtara kApI gusTAve vijaya meLavyo. gusTAvanI kazIya gaNanA na karanArA pelA yuvAna harIphonuM zuM thayuM ? gussava pachIno sauthI AgaLano harIpha emanAthI pUra eka divasa pAchaLa hato, gusTAve vijaya meLavyA pachI eka divasa bAda e vijayarekhAne pahoMcI zakyo. pachIne divase svIDananA rAjavIe ene nimaMtraNa ApyuM. e pachI 1959mAM jerUsalemanA pavitra sthaLe sAikala-yAtrA karI. 102 varSanI uMmare avasAna pAmela A dAdAjI 100 varSa sudhI to sAikala calAvatA rahyA. lokhaMDI dAdAjInI polAdI tAkAtane sarvatra Adara ane AvakAra maLyo. Aje ramatanI duniyAmAM AnaMda ane AzcaryathI lokhaMDI dAdAjInA niradhAra ne tAkAtane sahu yAda kare che. jhAkamajhoLamAM jIvatA ane bhoga , vilAsa ane vaibhavamAM DUbelA AjanA mAnavIne kAramI, kacaDAyelI mAnavajAtanI garIbAI joIne rUMvADuMya pharakatuM nathI ! kyAreka to e svayaM zoSaNa karIne garIbonI garIbAInuM sarjana karato hoya che ane kyAreka e potAnA svArthanI doDa ke zokhanI ghelachAmAM cArebAju saMbhaLAtI garIbInI cIsa sAme baherA kAna dharAve che. enA karmanI kaThaNAI kahIne krUra majAka uDAvato hoya che, to kyAre ka mAlikanI adAmAM bIjAnI tAbedArInI moja mANato hoya che. ene jAmathI chalakAtI mahephilamAM rasa che. pANInAM TIpAM mATe marI rahelA mANasamAM nathI ! A pRthvInA graha para eka abaja ane eMsI karoDa loko atyaMta garIbAImAM jIve che. renI bAyera 38 mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI

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mane eka DaoNlara Apo ne ! emane eka TekanuM 'bhojana' maLatuM nathI. enA nasIbamAM 'bhojana' zabda hoto nathI. enI pAse to rastAmAM paDelA rahyA-khaDyA roTalI ke breDanA TukaDAo hoya che. e meLavavA mATe paNa ene 'yuddha' AdaravuM paDe che. melAMghelAM-phATelAM kapaDAMvALAM bALako enA mATe jhUMTAjhUMTa karatAM hoya che. pRthvInA ghara para rahelA mAnavIe vikAsa to cheka caMdra ne maMgaLa sudhI pahoMcavAno karyo, paNa e garIbanI peTanI Agane hajI ThArI zakato nathI. bAhya bhautika vikAsanI sAthe enI saMvedanAnuM gaLuM TUMpato rahyo che. yuddhanA atyAcAro hoya, AtaMkavAdano humalo hoya, rAjanetAonuM zoSaNa hoya ke AvakanuM koI sAdhana na hoya, tyAre kAramI garIbImAM sabaDatI prajAne mATe jIvavuM dohyaluM banI jatuM hoya che. kevI rIte jIvatAM haze A garIba bALako ? potAnA eka projekTanA anusaMdhAnamAM vizvakhyAta phoTogrAphara renI sI. bAyere AphrikAnA mAlI dezanI saphara karI. eno hetu to e hato ke AhAra sAthenA mAnavInA gADha saMbaMdhane batAvatI tasavIro jhaDapavI. AhAra samayanA enA caherA para jAgatA pratyeka manobhAvone tasavIramAM jhIlI levA ! paraMtu jema jema e A tasavIro jhIlatI gaI, tema tema jagatanI kaThora-naThora vAstavikatA enI najara sAme UbharI AvI. eNe nAnakaDA mAlI gAmamAM be varSano bALaka asahya garamI ane gUMgaLAmaNabharyA vAtAvaraNamAM lAkaDAM bALI kolaso banAvavAmAM enI mAtAne madadarUpa thato joyo. A dRzya joI renI sI, bAyeranA hAtha dhrujavA lAgyA. enuM kAraNa e hatuM ke tenI mAtAnI pAchaLa renI gaI, tyAre eNe moTA avAje mukhIne bolato sAMbhaLyo, | 'juo, je loko majUrI nahIM kare ene khAvAnI chuTTI nathI.' A be varSanA bALakane enI mAtA sAthe majUrI e mATe karavI paDatI hatI ke ene kaMIka khAvuM hatuM. e bALakanuM nAma hatuM mohamada e, ahamadu. moTI moTI tAmravarNI AMkhovALA e bALake hAthamAM thoDA cokhAnA dANA lIdhA. e ja enuM bhojana, e ja enuM jIvana ! A tasavIra jhIlyA pachI renI bAyara eTalI badhI becena banI gaI ke 40 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI e kSaNane e bhUlI zakatI nahotI. moTI AMkhovALA ane moTuM moTuM dharAvatA e Aphrikana bALakanA hAthamAM rahelA cokhAnA dANA enA mAnasacakSu samakSa satata taravaratA rahyA, paraMtu e tasavIranI sAthosAtha mukhIno niSphara avAja paNa hajI enA kAnamAM paDaghAto hato. A ghaTanAe renI bAyaranA cittamAM evuM manomaMthana jagAvyuM ke eka bAju jagatamAM kAramI garIbI che ane enI sAme saMvedanahIna lokonI niSpharatA che. have ene ramaNIya prAkRtika dRzyonI chabI pADavAmAM koI cena ke sukuna maLatuM nahotuM. koI vaibhavI samAraMbho, bhavya saraghaso ke vaibhavI ke viziSTa pradarzano joIne jANe eno kaeNmero ja mukha pheravI leto hato ! enA hRdayamAMthI pokAra jAgyo, ke A to kevI bALamajUrI, jyAM bALakane janmathI ja kSaNekSaNa kAramI yAtanA bhogavavI paDe che ? garIbAInI A kedamAMthI mota sivAya kyAreya mukti nahIM. mAtra be varSanI vaye ja thoDAka cokhAnA dANAne mATe kAramAM tApamAM kevuM jhajhUmavuM paDe che ! jyAM zvAsa levo paNa muzkela hoya evI jagAe kAma karavuM 'kAIka divasa" * 41,

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paDe che ane te mAtra be varSanI kumaLI vaye ! ane e kAmanI sAthe zoSaNakhoro taraphathI vIMjhAtA zAbdika ke zArIrika koraDAono sAmano to kharo ja ! e divasathI renI bAyeranI dRSTi ane enA kaeNmerAnI AMkha palaTAI gaI. eNe manomana nirdhAra karyo ke mAre saMvedanahIna jagatane enI khovAI gayelI saMvedanAnuM saranAmuM ApavuM che ! niSphara mAnavahRdayamAM kyAMka lapAIchupAIne paDelA karuNAnA sotane saheja sparzavo che. vaibhavanI AMkhothI aMjAIne aMdha banelA mAnavIne evI vedanAno ahesAsa karAvavo che ke garIbAIthI lAcAra banelA mAnavIo kevA dojakhamAM jIve che ! evAmAM kamboDiyAnI tasavIrakalAnI eka varkazopamAM renI bAyarane vadhu eka hRdayadrAvaka anubhava thayo. A varkazopamAM A vikhyAta tasavIrakalAvid vinAmUlya tAlImArthIone zikSaNa ApatI hatI. A samaye eNe eka chokarAne joyo. eNo eka hADapiMjara jevuM bALaka tevuM hatuM. e bALakanuM nisteja mAthuM e chokarAnA khabhA para DhaLeluM hatuM. enI moTI AMkhomAM garIbAI thIjI gaI hatI. pelA chokarAe enA phATelA zarTamAMthI pAtaLo hAtha heja lAMbo karyo ane renI bAyara sAme joIne kahyuM, 'maeNDama, eka DaoNlara Apo... plIjha, phakta eka ja , mArA bhAI mATe. plIjha.... plIjha.' bAyare e tarapha joyuM. enA cittamAM 'eka DaoNlara ' e zabdo paDaghA pADavA lAgyA. eNe vicAryuM ke eka DaoNlaramAM zuM thAya ? eka DaoNlaramAM kaI rIte A nAno bhAI ane moTo bhAI jIvI zake ? hA, kadAca eka DaoNlaramAMthI je kaMI maLe te khAIne potAnuM jIvana thoDuM vadhu laMbAvI zake, AkharI zvAsane thoDA Ave ThelI zake. bAyare ene eka DaoNlara Apyo ane enAthI vyathita banelI bAyere kamboDiyAmAM cAlatA eka rAhata saMgaThanane AnI vAta karI. A samaye eNe kalpanA paNa karI nahotI evI hakIkata enI sAme AvI, kamboDiyAnA sAthIoe ene kahyuM, ke zerImAM ApelI 'eka DaoNlara 'nI bhIkhathI zoSitanA mukhamAM enuM bhojana javAne badale zoSaNa karanAranAM khissAM bharAya che ! zoSitonuM zoSaNa karanArA kevA kahevAya ? ahIM koI koInI hatyA karatuM nathI, paNa hakIkatamAM gaNatarIpUrvaka mAnavahatyA kare che. zoSaNa karanArI 42 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI vyaktio zoSitonuM lohI vahevaDAvyA vagara emanA jIvanane phAMsI Ape che. Avo zoSaka game teTalo dUra hoya, topaNa samAjamAM zeThiyo' kahevAya che. enI duSTatA jovAne badale samAja enA doradamAmane sASTAMga daMDavat kare che. mAlI zaheranI ane kamboDiyA dezanI ghaTanAe renI sI. bAyarane evI to vyagra banAvI dIdhI ke have eNe enA vicArane AkAra ApavAno prayatna zarU karyo. renI mAne che ke bhItaramAMthI nAnI bena sAthe garIba bALaka eka avAja Ave, pachI pArakA sAdanI rAha jovAnI na hoya. enA aMtaramAMthI UThelI tINI cIsa enA astitvane kaMpAvI de che. e koI projekTanI rAha jovAne badale A kAmamAM DUbI gaI. manamAM vicAra Avyo ke garIbAI koI deza ke khaMDamAM sImita nathI. e to AkhI mAnavajAtine mAthe toLAyelo abhizApa che. A mATe eNe jagatabhramaNa karavA vicAryuM. eka vicAra zuM parivartana sAdhe che, te renI bAyaranA jIvanamAM jovA maLyuM, te ja rIte thomasa e, najhariyone AvA ja eka vicAre saMsthA sthApavAnI preraNA ApI. sAteka varSa pUrve eNe "dha pharagoTana inTaranezanala' nAmanI saMsthAnI racanA karI. vAta evI banI hatI ke mahAnagaronI zerImAM ghUmatAM ghUmatAM najhariyone atyaMta kaMTALo Avyo. bIjI bAju ene gAmaDAMmAM vasatAM potAnAM kuTuMbIjano yAda AvatA hatA. e gAmaDAMmAM evA paNa loko hatA ke kazuM ja meLavyA vinA emanuM astitva TakAvI rAkhavA mATe jhajhUmI rahyA hatA. najhariyone AvA vaMcita lokonI ciMtA jAgI. ema thayuM ke zaheranA saMpanna mAnavIone to bharI bharIne nIrakhyA. eka samaye AkarSaka lAgatI emanI ronaka have sAva jhAMkhI koIka divasa" * 43

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lAge che. mAre gAmaDAmAM vasatA e lokono vicAra karavo joIe ke jemane jIvana TakAvavA mATe rojeroja nahIM, paNa pratikSaNa mahAbhArata khelavuM paDe che. thomasa najhariyo manomana vicArato hato ke "molamAM jaIe tyAre ApaNe jarUrI cIjavastuo meLavavA mATe keTalI badhI darakAra karatA hoIe chIe. ene mATe molamAM ahIMtahIM ghUmI vaLIne puSkaLa samaya vitAvIe chIe, paraMtu potAnA astitva kAje jhajhumatA loko vize ApaNane vicAra sudhdhAM Avato nathI. zuM lokone satyanI pratIti karAvavA mATe ke jagADavA mATe phakta bhayaMkara vaMToLa ke dharatIkaMpa ja pUratA che ? zuM dararoja garIbAInA kAraNe asaMkhya loko mRtyu pAme che, te vAstavikatA tarapha dhyAna kendrita karavAnI jarUra nathI ? jagatanA A AkarA satyanI zodha karavAno najhariyAe vicAra karyo. zahera choDIne gAmaDAMmAM ane gAmaDAMmAM paNa koI atyaMta garIba evI vastImAM mota TAMpIne beThuM hoya evA lokonI vacce javAnI khevanA rAkhI ane emAM eNe phoTojarnAlisTa renI bAyarano sAtha maLyo. najhariyonA vicArane to renI bAyere kyAranoya potAnI tasavIromAM keda karyo hato. e tasavIro bAyeranI najaramAMthI khasatI nahotI. thomasa najhariyoe ene eka projekTa tarIke A kAma soMpyuM ane koIe bAyarane pUchavuM paNa kharuM ke tame koI projekTa ke asAinmenTa para kAma karatA ho, tyAre tamAruM citta phakta e mujaba je kAma kare che ? enA uttaramAM renI bAyare A pramANe kahyuM, 'juo, koI asAinmenTa mATe vATa jovAnI na hoya. vyaktie jAte eka vicAra pedA karavAno hoya ane pachI e vicAra para rAtadivasa kArya karavAnuM hoya.' renI bAyare potAnuM kAma zarU karyuM. e je koI dezamAM jatI, tyAMnA tasavIrakArone maLatI. emanI saMskRtine pAmavAno prayAsa karatI. bane teTalI mAhitI ekaThI karatI. prajAjIvananI ekeeka bAbatanI jANakArI meLavatI enI vistRta noMdha taiyAra karatI. pachI bhale e vigato ene upayogI na hoya. e pachI koI patrakArane sAthe rAkhatI. zahera ane gAmaDAMnI zerIomAM ghUmatI, lokonA inTaravyu letI. koI ghaTanA ke chabIne kaeNmerAmAM kaMDAravA mATe kalAko A * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI ke divaso vitAvavA paDatA. paNa renI bAyarane AnaMda e vAtano ke eNe koI 'pojha" ke "poTreTa'no phoTogrApha lIdho nahoto, paNa 21mI sadInI globala banelI duniyAmAM motanA othAra heThaLa rajhaLatI jiMdagInI sAcI chabI meLavI hatI. je dharatI para ane je samayamAM ApaNe jIvIe chIe, e samayanI A jIvaMta hakIkata che ! pragatinA AkAzane AMbavA nIkaLelI pRthvI paranI mAnavajAtanI sauthI moTI pIchehaThano A najare dITho ahevAla che. mugdha ane ramatiyALa bALapaNane parIkathAonI raMgIna duniyAmAM ramatuM mUkavAne badale ahIM peTano khADo pUravA mATe jIvataranAM rudhira reDavAM paDe che ! AphrikAnA ghAnAmAM vasatI ATha varSanI phAtI para lAMbA vakhatathI maleriyAnI bImArIe bharaDo lIdhelo che. ekAeka evI TADhI dhrujArI Ave ke AkhuM zarIra tharathara kAMpavA lAge, paNa na to enI pAse dardanI phikara karavAno samaya che ke na to enI pAse koI davA che. e ilekTronika upakaraNonA pheMkI dIdhelA bhAgonA DhagalAmAM kaMIka meLavavA hAtha nAkhIne phaMphose che. i-vesTanA jokhamI vAtAvaraNamAM ene eka-eka penI meLavavA mATe potAnA Arogyane dAva para lagADavuM paDe che. A i-vesTamAMthI maLelA bhAgo eka nAnakaDI bakeTamAM bhare che ane pachI dhAtuothI bharelI e bakeTa mAthA para samatola rAkhIne vecavA nIkaLe che. ene eTalI AzA che ke eka TaMkanA lukhA-sUkA bhojana pUratI rakama to AmAMthI maLI jaze. zarIramAM tAva ane mAthA para vajanane kAraNe satata vedanAthI pIDAya che. enI AMkhomAMthI AMsu Tapake che, paNa game te thAya ene jIvavuM hoya, to A rojanA motanI vaccethI pasAra thavuM paDe che. pacIsa varSanI libiyAmAM vasatI jesTinA koko ane enI putrI sAtAnI sthiti kalpanAne paNa dhrujAvI nAkhe tevI che. jesTinA koko mAtra traNa varSanI hatI ane sAva pAMgaLI banI gaI. e pagathI cAlI zakatI nathI. hAthathI ghasaDAtAM ghasaDAtAM cAle che. e lokonAM kapaDAM dhue che, gaLacaTAM biskiTa vecIne gujarAna calAve che ane emAMya kyAreka biskiTa kharIdavAnA paisA na hoya, tyAre bhIkha mAgIne zvAsa dhabakatA rAkhe che. enA dilamAM eka 'kAIka divasa" * 45

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ja icchA che, mArI dIkarI sAtAne nizALe mokalIne bhaNAvI zakuM to basa ! hAla to enA nasIbamAM potAnA gaMdA gharanA lAkaDAnA kloranA bAraNe kokaDuM vaLIne besI rahevAnuM lakhAyeluM che. prakRti jenA para anarAdhAra varasI che evA AphrikAnA dezonuM pahelA gorA lokoe zoSaNa karyuM, e pachI emane AjhAdI maLI paNa e AjhAdI mukti nahotI. e ja Aphrikano saramukhatyAra banyA ane lokonAM hADacAma cUsI levA lAgyA. ghAnAmAM ghaNAM kuTuMbo evAM che ke jyAM eka sAmAnya jhUMpaDImAM vIsa-vIsa mANasonuM kuTuMba vasatuM hoya ! e khIcokhIca mAnavothI bharelI jhUMpaDImAM pANInI koI vyavasthA hotI nathI. bAtharUmanI to kalpanA paNa kyAMthI thAya? AvAM gaMdakInA gaMja dharAvatAM raheThANomAM vasavATa karavo eTale narakathI paNa badatara jugAe jIvavuM ! pacIsa varSanI jesTinA kokone koIkanA ghare TUMTiyuM vALIne rahevuM paDe che. koIkanA gharanI galImAM enI bALakI sAthe tene sUvA maLe, to thoDIghaNI UMgha nasIba thAya che. jesTinAnA dilamAM satata evI AzA che ke koIka divasa ene nAnakaDI kholI maLaze ! koIka divasa emAM e potAnI dIkarI sAthe emAM rahI zakaze ! koIka divasa e enI dIkarIne nizALe mokalI zakaze ! A 'koIka divasa' kyAre Avaze eno jesTinA kokone koI aMdAja nathI. Aje to mAtra ene darabadara bhaTakatA rahevuM paDe che. paDozIonI maherabAnI para jIvavuM paDe che. jo koI dayA lAvIne ene gharanA khUNe sUvAnI rajA Ape, to ene sUvA maLe che. kAramI garIbImAM ane motathI badatara. hAlatamAM jIvatI jesTinA hajI jiMdagIthI hArI nathI. cheka traNa varSanI hatI tyAre e vikalAMga banI. kAramI garIbI, bhUkhanuM du:kha, rahevAnuM koI ghara nahIM ane cAlI zake evA paga nahIM ! mAtra paga ja pAMgaLA thayA nahotA, ke enI jiMdagI pAMgaLI thaI gaI hatI. Aje e bhIkha mAgIne potAno gujAro kare che. varasAda hoya, tyAre ene bahAra nIkaLavuM paNa muzkela bane che. ughADavALA divase ene sakhata mahenata karavI paDe che. e AjubAjuthI kapaDAM ekaThAM kare che ane pachI dhovA bese che. ene kAma karIne jIvavAnI bhAre tamannA che, pAMca varSanI putrI enI 46 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI jasTinA koko ane enI putrI AMkhanI kIkI che ane ene mATe e game tevo saMgharSa kheDavA taiyAra che. kyAreka ema paNa thAya ke amerikA jevA samRddha dezanI jelamAM rahetA gunegArone A garIbo karatAM vadhAre savalata ane adhikAro che ! gunegArone sUvA mATe pUratI ja gA maLe che, palaMga para pathArI maLe che ane divasamAM traNa TaMka bhojana maLe che. jesTinA koko ane sAtAnI kamanasIbI e ke e evA dezamAM janmyA ke je deza avirata AMtaravigraha, kAramo duSkALa, aNadhArI kudaratI Aphato ane sauthI vadhu to zoSaNakhora julmI saramukhatyArothI gherAyelo che. jiMdagImAM garIbInI Aphata hoya, paNa e AphatanI sAthe bIjI ghaNI Aphata AvatI hoya che. agiyAra vyaktinA parivAranuM bharaNapoSaNa karatI phAnA kamaboDiyA ane thAilaeNnDanI sarahade AvelI eka khANamAM kAma karatI hatI. 1988mAM e khANamAM aNadhArI rIte eka suraMga phATI ane phAnA suraMganI lapeTamAM AvI gaI. emAM ene eno eka paga gumAvavo paDyo. Aje sAITha varSanI vidhavA phAnA agiyAra lokonA parivAranI mobhI che. parivArajanone thoDA breDanA TukaDA maLe ene mATe jIvanamAM mahAbhAratIya 'koIka divasa' * 47

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saMgharSa khele che. e bhADAnA gharamAM rahe che ane have e bilDaranI dhamakIno sAmano kare che, kAraNa eTaluM ke 2008mAM eka bilDare A vistAra kharIdI lIdho che ane have e vistAranAM badhAM gharo toDI pADIne imArata UbhI karavA mAge che. vidhavA phAnA pAse enI AvatIkAla keTalI karuNa haze e vicAravAno samaya nathI, kAraNa ke ene A apaMga avasthAmAM paNa satata kAma karavuM paDe che. eMsI varSanI boliviyana vRddhA jekobA kokiTA savAre sADA sAta vAge khetaramAM jaIne godhUli veLA sudhI khetaramAM paDelA javanA dANA ke lIlA vaTANA vINe che, buDhApo enA para savAra thaI gayo che, mAMDa mAMDa eka eka DagaluM bharI zake che ane sAva jhAMkhI AMkhe khetaramAM vaTANA zodhe che. enI pAse potAnI eka gAya ane gadheDo che, paraMtu ene zuM khavaDAvI zake? AthI e prANIone rajhaLatAM mUkI de che. AvI sthitimAM hamaNAM duSkALe dekhA dIdhI che. ocho varasAda paDatAM vaTANAnA utpAdana para te Uge te pahelAM ja ghAtaka asara thaI che, AthI A eMsI varSanI vRddhAne mATe khetaramAMthI anAjanA dANA vINIne najIkanA zaheramAM jaIne vecavA sivAya bIjo koI Aro ke ovAro nathI. zALAe javAnA je divaso hoya, tyAre peTano khADo pUravA bALakone majUrI karavI paDe che. bALamajUrI sAme duniyAbharamAM avAjo jAge che. hakIkatamAM to garIbI sAme avAja UThavo joIe, kAraNa ke bALamajUrI e bALakanI lAcArI hoya che. keTalAya dezomAM nAnakaDA chokarAo Dhora carAvavA jAya che, to keTalAya dezomAM mAtApitAne evI AkarI majUrI karavI paDe che ke saMtAnane nizALe mokalavAnI kalpanA thaI zakatI nathI. emane nAnAM bhAIbahenane sAcavavAnAM hoya che. renI bAyare duniyAnA cAra khaMDonA daseka jeTalA dezonI saphara karI. eno hetu to evo hato ke rojanA eka DaoNlara karatAM paNa ochI Avaka sAthe gujarAna calAvatAM lokonI tasavIro laIne A duniyA paranI garIbAIno vAstavika khyAla peza karavo. eka arthamAM kahIe to duniyAnA sauthI garIba lokonA saMgharSane kaeNmerAnI AMkhe nihALIne dastAveja rUpe jagata samakSa prastuta 48 * mATIe ghaDavAM mAnavI karavo. eNe jiMdagIne badalI nAkhe tevI musApharInA nicoDa rUpe baso ne paMdara tasavIronuM 'liviMga oNna a DaoNlara a De : dhI lAivjha oNpha dhI varDjha pUara' pustaka taiyAra karyuM. AmAM eka DaoNlaranI kamANI para nabhatAM kuTuMbonI karuNa kathA AlekhI. kyAMka cha-cha vyaktinuM kuTuMba hoya ane kuTuMbanI kamANI mAtra eka DaoNlara hoya. AvA lokonA rojiMdA jIvananI kSaNone eNe kaeNmerAmAM kaMDArI dIdhI ane eNe kalpanA paNa karI na hoya evI paristhiti jovA maLI ane anubhUti thavA lAgI. na A tasavIromAM vedanA, bhUkha, lAcArI, nisahAyatA ane kudaratanI krUra majAka jovA maLe che. A jagata para eka abaja ne eMsI lAkha loko kAramI garIbImAM jIve che, paNa jeo samRddha che evA bahu ochA lokoe A garIbonI AMkhamAM AvelAM AMsu joyAM che. emane madada karIne lUchavAnI vAta to bAjue rahI ! rainI sI. bAyaranI A vaizvika pravAsayAtrAmAM eNe bhAratanI garIbIne paNa tasavIromAM ujAgara karI che. bhavya utsavo, mahotsavo ane pracaMDa AyojanonA A dezamAM rahelI garIbInuM renI bAyare je Alekhana karyuM che te hakIkata joIne ApaNuM mAthuM zaramathI jhUkI jAya che. bhAratanA dharmazAlAmAM AvelI eka jhUMpaDapaTTImAM gharamAM mAtra be ja sabhya rahe che. eka che pAMca varSanI rudrA ane bIjI che traNa varSanI suhAnI. emane na koI Azaro che ke na koI AdhAra che. uttara bhAratanA eka gAmamAM jhUMpaDAmAM vasatI vIsa varSanI kalpanAne be putrIo che. eka che be varSanI saMgItA ane bIjI che pAMca mahinAnI saritA. be varSanI saMgItAne enI mAtA bhUkhI rAkhe che. nava pAuMDanuM vajana dharAvatI A saMgItAnA hADapiMjara jevA zarIrane joIne vadhu bhIkha maLe tethI khAvA ApatI nathI. to ja kalpanA enA pAMca mahinAnA bALakanI saMbhALa laI zake. dilhInA e jhUMpaDapaTTInA vistAranA kacarAonA DhagalAnI bAjumAM bhayaMkara durgaMdha dharAvatA maLa-mUtranA ukaraDAne phaMphosato eka bALaka joyo. enA hAtha khullA hatA. enA hAtha para koI rakSaNAtmaka mojuM ke bIjuM kazuM paheryuM nahotuM. enAM vastro melAM ane phATelAM hatAM. A ukaraDAmAMthI kazuMka 'koIka divasa' * 49

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garIbInAM dazya potAnI tasavIromAM kaMDAryo, paNa ene sauthI vadhu pIDA to bhAratamAM thaI. eNe ema noMdhyuM ke A bhAratamAM meluM upaDAvavAnuM dhikkArabharyuM kArya karAvAya che. strIone sAva najIvI rakama ApIne mAthA para viSTA upADavAnI sthiti ane nara ka thI paNa badatara lAgI, enAthI e eTalI badhI vyathita thaI gaI ke ghaNI vAra e tasavIra pADavAne badale potAnA kemerAmAM rahelI bIjI koI tasavIrane jotI hatI ane ApaNI saMvedanabadhiratA joIne enAthI UMDo niHsAso nakhAI jato hato. garIbI ane bhUkhanAM AMsu meLavIne ane ene vecIne potAnA kuTuMbIjanono nibhAva karavAno prayatna karato hato. A samaye renI bAyera dhomadhakhatA tApamAM UbhA rahIne vicAratI hatI ke A chokaro emanA tarapha jue. dhomadhakhato tApa, nAka phADI nAkhe evI bhayaMkara dugaMdha ane enI vacce A chokaro Ubho hato, jenI bAyera vicAratI hatI ke A chokarAnA phoTAne arthasabhara rIte kaI rIte prastuta karuM ? AthI e enI sAthe chokarAnA ghera gaI. bAyare AvuM ghara jiMdagImAM joyuM nahotuM. dasa bAya dasanI oraDImAM A traNe chokarAo ajita, dilIpa ane kuladIpa rahetA hatA, paraMtu sAthosAtha eNe e paNa joyuM ke A chokarAo sAthe maLIne moja mastI karatA hatA. renI bAyara vicAramAM paDI. eka bAju ukaraDAmAMthI kazuMka phaMphosato chokaro ane bIjI bAju potAnA bAMdhavo sAthe majAka-mastI karato chokaro. A chokaro enA kuTuMbane jIvatuM rAkhavAmAM madadarUpa thato hato ane enI sAthosAtha pathArImAM sahunI sAthe moja mastI karato hato. garIbInAM AMsu ane AnaMdano AviSkAra - baMne ekasAthe anubhavyAM. AmAMthI renI bAyarane eka navuM rahasya maLyuM. mAnavI sauthI duSkara vipadAbharI paristhitimAMthI kevI rIte potAno mArga zodhI zake che te jovA maLyuM. A hRdayadrAvaka tasavIro lenArI renI bAyere bALamajUrI ane kAramI 50 * mATIe ghaDavAM mAnavI koIka divasa' * 51

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bhItarano avAja gaganacuMbI imAratanI jhAkajhamALa jagata jue che, paraMtu enA pAyAmAM rahelI IMTa ke paththaro tarapha koI viralAnI ja dRSTi paDe che. prazaMsA ane zaNagAra bhale gaganacuMbI imAratanA thatA hoya, paraMtu majabUta AdhAra ane samarpaNano mahimA to enA pAyAmAM paDelI IMTono hoya che. jema nAnakaDI IMTamAMthI vizALa imAratanuM sarjana thAya che, e ja rIte koI ekAda nAnakaDA maulika vicArathI vyakti jagatane ajAyaba lAge evI abhUtapUrva imAratanuM sarjana kare che. e vijJAnanI heratabharI duniyA hoya, sAhityanI sauMdaryamayI sRSTi hoya, TaeNkanolojInuM koI saMzodhana hoya ke pachI mAnavakaruNAnI koI vAta hoya ! saghaLe maulika vicArano mahimA che, jenA para AcAranI apUrva imArata caNAya che. eka maulika vicAra samaya jatAM jagatanI dRSTine palaTI nAkhe che. cittamAM eka bhAva jAge ane adamya puruSArthathI e bhAva sAkAra thAya, tyAre kalpanA paNa karI na hoya te rIte jagatano cahero badalAI jAya che. yugAnDA dezano vatanI Dereka kAyongo, eka nirvAsita tarIke ahIM-tahIM bhaTakavAmAM enuM bALapaNa pasAra thayuM, paraMtu e pachI A yuvAne puruSArtha karIne jIvanamAM pragati hAMsala karI. eka vAra potAnA koI kAma mATe eNe amerikAnA philADelphiyAnI eka hoTalamAM rokANa karyuM. eNe joyuM to A hoTalamAM roja navI navI sAbunI goTI badalavAmAM AvatI hatI. pahelAM to kAyongoe ema mAnyuM ke A navA sAbunI kiMmata enI pAsethI vasUla karavAmAM Avaze, ethI eNe kahyuM ke jUno sAbu cAlaze, Aje navA sAbunI mAre jarUra nathI. hoTalanA karmacArIe kahyuM, 'roja navI sAbunI goTI pUrI pADavAnI hoTalanI prathA che, AthI tame enI kiMmatanI lezamAtra phikara karo nahIM. gaIkAlanI thoDI vaparAyelI sAbunI goTI mane pAchI ApI do. tamane roja navo sAbu vinAmUlya ApavAmAM Avaze.' Dereka kAyongone hajI e samajAyuM nahIM ke teo zA mATe eNe vAparelI sAbunI goTI laI gayA ane navI goTI mUkI gayA ! Dereka yugAnDA pAcho Avyo, tyAre eNe enA pitAne kahyuM, 'A amerikAmAM to hoTalamAM roja navI navI sAbunI goTI ApavAmAM Ave che ane jUnI goTI pheMkI de che.' DerekanA anubhavanI vAta sAMbhaLIne enA pitAe vasavaso pragaTa karatAM hoya tema kahyuM, 'amerikA jevA dezane sAbunI goTI pheMkI devI posAya." pitAnAM A vasavasAbharyA vAkyoe Derekane vicArato karI mUkyo. eNe vicAryuM ke roja navo sAbu mUkavAnI prathA dharAvanArI hoTalo to duniyAbharamAM ghaNA dezomAM haze. A dareka hoTalamAM roja savAre pratyeka rUmamAMthI thoDI ghaNI vaparAyelI sAbunI goTIo laI levAtI haze ane navI nakkora goTI mUkavAmAM AvatI haze. Ane pariNAme thoDI vaparAyelI keTalI badhI sAbunI goTIo pheMkI devAtI haze ! vaLI bIjI bAju A duniyA para evAM hajAro loko che ke jemanA nasIbamAM sAbunI goTI paNa nathI ane ene kAraNe emane aneka rogonAM bhoga banavuM paDe che. bhItarano avAja * 53 Dereka kAyogo

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Dereka kAyogonA cittamAM ekAeka eka vicAra jhabakyo. AvI sAbunI goTIo ekaThI karIne ene pharIthI navI taiyAra karIe to kevuM? jeo sAbu kharIdI zakatAM nathI temane AvI taiyAra karelI goTIo mokalIe to kevuM sAruM? kAyongo potAnA bALapaNanI kAramI garIbAI ane rajhaLapATa bhUlyo na hato. yugAnDAnA saramukhatyAra idI amInanA nirdayI julamathI UgaravA mATe e enAM mAtApitA sAthe vatanamAMthI bhAgI chUTyo hato. jIva bacAvavA mATe aneka yAtanAo sahana karI hatI ane pArAvAre abhAva vacce nirvAsitanI chAvaNImAM Azaro lIdho hato. e samaye chAvaNIomAM UbharAtAM bebasa mAnavIo ane copAsa phelAyelI gaMdakI vacce jIvavuM paDyuM hatuM. keTalAMya kamabhAgI bALakone A gaMdA, asvaccha vAtAvaraNamAM akALe avasAna pAmatAM joyAM hatAM. e du:khanI rAta ghaNI lAMbI hatI ane potAnA bALapaNanI e hRdayavidAraka smRtionI vAta karatAM Dereka kAyongo bolI UThe che, 'jeno aMta na Ave tema hoya evA lAMbA samaya sudhI du:kha veThyA pachI zALAethI AvatAM bALakonA mRtadeha jovA maLe, tyAre tenI karuNatAnI vAta kema karI zakAya ? mArA puSkaLa mitro anAtha banyA hatA, jyAre huM jIvavA mATe nasIbadAra nIvaDyo.' kAyongoe A chAvaNImAM pAyAnI jarUriyAtathI vaMcita lokone puSkaLa saMgharSa karatA joyA hatA. e samaye sAbunI sAcI mUlyavattAno Dereka kAyongone ahesAsa thayo. kAyongoe kahyuM, 'nirvAsitonA kaeNmpamAM jIvatA lokonuM jIvana badatara hatuM. sAbu meLavavo te to emane mATe atyaMta muzkelIbharyuM kAma hatuM. are ! ema kahI zakAya ke emane mATe sAbu jevI cIjanuM pRthvI para koI astitva ja nahotuM ane bIjI bAju mAtra hAtha dhoIne ene svaccha karI zakavAnI azaktine kAraNe loko gaMbhIra rIte bImAra paDI jatA hatA.' kAyonga kaoNlejamAM abhyAsa karIne snAtaka banyo ane samaya jatAM amerikAno nAgarika banyo. amerikA jevA samRddha dezamAM AvyA pachI paNa potAnA bhUtakALane e vIsaryo nahIM. copAsa dekhAtI bhavyatA vacce e mAdare-vatananI daridratAne bhUlyo nahoto. samRddha mahAnagaronI camaka-damakathI e aMjAI jato hato, paraMtu enA S4 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI hoTalomAMthI vaparAyela sAbune ekaThA karato Dereka kAyongo manamAMthI svadezanAM rogiSTa, nirbaLa, hADapiMjara jevAM zizuonI karuNAdra chabI khasatI nahotI. kyAreka enuM citta vicAre caDatuM ke ahIM amerikAmAM Izvare keTaluM aDhaLaka ApyuM che ane tyAM Izvare jarU2 pUratuM ApavAmAM paNa bhAre kaMjUsAI dAkhavI che ! ahIM to vinAmUlya roja navI navI sAbunI goTIo pratyeka rUmamAM badalavAmAM Ave che. A vAta sAMbhaLIne Dereka kAyongoe amerikAnI samRddhi pratye vAha vAha karI nahIM, paraMtu ene e vAtanuM smaraNa thayuM ke mArA dezanAM evAM keTalAMya bALako che ke jemane sAbunI goTI maLatI nathI. snAna karIne cokhkhAM thaI zakatAM nathI. dhULa, mATI ane cepI roganAM jaMtuothI emanA deha lIMpelA hoya che ane svacchatAnA abhAve e jIvaleNa rogano bhoga bane che. kyAMka mAtAnA khoLAmAM jenA dehanAM hADakAM gaNI zakAya evuM bALaka maravA mATe aMtima zvAsanAM taraphaDiyAM mAratuM hoya che, to kyAMka nizALe gayeluM bALaka jIvatuM ghera pAchuM pharatuM nathI, eno mRtadeha ja pAcho Ave che ! e vicArato hato ke hAtha asvaccha hovAne kAraNe vyakti bImAra paDe ane pachI ene haoNspiTalamAM dAkhala thavuM paDe te ghaNuM kharcALa banI jAya che. A saghaLI samasyAno pAyo svacchatAno abhAva che ane ene pariNAme mRtyuno vadhato AMka che. bhItarano avAja * 55

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amerikAmAM navA imigranTa ane navA nAgarika tarIke kAyongone jIvavA maLyuM teno ene AnaMda hato, paraMtu eka Aphrikana tarIke e potAnA vatananA lokonI paristhiti saheje bhUlI zake tema nahoto ane ethI eNe manomana vicAra karyo ke A sAbunI goTIo ekaThI karIe, ene kacarAnA DhagalAmAM padharAvI devAne badale svaccha karIe ane dariyApAra mokalavA mATe pharI prakriyAmAMthI pasAra karIe ane pachI jo e haitI, yugAnDA ane svAjhIlenDa jevA dezomAM mokalAya, to tyAMnAM garIba bALakone e jIvaleNa rogo sAme laDavAmAM madadarUpa banI zake. zarUAtamAM to Dereka kAyongonA A vicArane sahue hasI kADhyo. kaI rIte duniyAnI hoTalomAMthI sAbunI goTIo bhegI thAya ? e bhegI thayA pachI koNa eno punaH upayoga karI zakAya evI prakriyAmAMthI ene pasAra kare ? evI sAbunI goTI atyaMta garIba hAlatamAM jIvatA loko sudhI koNa pahoMcADe Ama Dereka kAyongo sAme 'koNa ?'nA keTalAya prazno hatA, paraMtu bIjI bAju ochI Avaka dharAvatA dezomAM jIvatAM bALakono UMco mRtyudara ene vyathita karato hato. e jANato hato ke sAbu prApya nathI teno prazna nathI, kharo prazna to enI kiMmatano che. sauthI moTI samasyA to e sAmAnya mAnavInI kharIdazaktinI che. Dereka kAyorgonA kahevA pramANe, "eka DaoNlara kamAtI vyakti mATe sAbunI goTI 25 senTamAM paDatI hoya to, e sAbunI goTI kharIdavAne badale khAMDa ke davA kharIdavAnuM vadhu pasaMda karaze. jIvana mATe jarUrI hoya, evI anivArya vastu vyakti sAmAnya rIte pahelI pasaMda kare che.' Dereka kAyongoe tapAsa karI ke sAna enTonio ane TeksAsa jevAM amerikAnAM rAjyonI Azare vIseka lAkhanI vastI che ane garIba dezomAM vIsa lAkha jeTalAM bALako prativarSa maraDA (DAyariyA) jevI bImArIne kAraNe mRtyu pAme che. Dereke hoTalonI mulAkAta lIdhI tyAre eNe pracaMDa AghAtanI lAgaNI anubhavI, ekalA uttara amerikAmAM ja dara varSe karoDo sAbunI goTIo A rIte pheMkI devAtI hoya che. eNe enI jAtane prazna karyo, 'jyAre bIjA loko pAse divasonA divaso sudhI sAbunI eka paNa goTI na hoya, tyAre ATalA badhA vipula jaththAmAM sAbunI goTIo kharekhara pheMkI S6 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI nirvAsitone sAbunI goTI devAya kharI ?" enA aMtaramAMthI avAja jAgyo, 'AvuM kadI sAMkhI levAya nahIM. AvI sthiti saheje yogya nathI.' eNe svapna jovAnuM zarU karyuM. AvI sAbunI goTIo navA rUpe garIbone maLe to ? potAnI A bhAva darzAvatAM e kahe che, "ApaNe badhAM svapno joIe chIe, paNa keTalAka loko temanI jiMdagI svapna sAkAra karavAmAM vitAve che, jyAre bIjA jiMdagIbhara svapnAMo ja joyAM kare che. tame tamArAM svapno jIvI jANo cho eTale tame tamArI niSphaLatAonI bhItine bAju para mUkI zako cho. niSphaLatAone zIkhavAnI prayogazALA mAnIne tamArA dhyeyanI siddhi mATe yatna karo cho. meM haMmezAM irAdAo ane saMkalpane sAkAra karavA mATe niSphaLatAne cAhavAno prayatna karyo che.' Ama Dereka kAyongone copAsa niSphaLatA maLI, paraMtu e niSphaLatAmAM enI saphaLatAnI zodha cAlu hatI. eNe dhanADhaya loko ke vaibhavI hoTalanA mAliko pratye koI aNagamo dAkhavyo nahIM. jemane roja eka nahIM, paNa aneka sAbunI goTIo prApta thatI hatI evA sukhI-samRddha lokonI IrSA karI nahIM, bhItarano avAja * 57

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paraMtu eNe A paristhitimAMthI mArga kADhavAnuM nakkI karyuM. e mAnato hato ke bIjA loko ApaNe mATe zuM nathI karatA enI phariyAda karavI te ApaNe mATe yogya nathI. paraMtu ApaNe sahue sAthe maLIne vicAra karIne A paristhitino ukela meLavavo joIe ane e ukelanI dizAmAM javA mATe Dereka kAyongo duniyAne eka navo vicAra ApavA mATe kaTibaddha banyo. A sAbunI goTIo pharI prosesa karIne jarUriyAtamaMdane ApavAmAM Ave, to keTalAM badhAM bALako ane potAnA vatanamAM vasatAM jAtibhAIo akALa karuNa mRtyumAMthI UgarI jAya ! eNe vaparAyelA sAbune punaH vAparavA mATenI prosesa zarU karI ane duniyAnAM bALakono mRtyudara ghaTADavA aMge bAtha bhIDavA pahelA pagathiye paga mUkavAnuM nakkI karyuM. bALakonuM zarIra cokhkhuM na hoya, emanA hAtha gaMdA hoya, enA para jIvANuo lAgelAM hoya, tethI e bALako je kaMI bhojana kare, tenI sAthe roganAM jaMtuo emanAM zarIramAM jatAM hatAM. hAtha cokhkhA karavA, e eka sAmAnya bAbata lAge che, paNa e hakIkatamAM manuSya jAtinI svacchatAne mATe asAmAnya bAbata che. Dereka kAyongoe Ane mATe 2009mAM eka yojanA zarU karI. e yojanAnuM nAma rAkhyuM 'globala zopa projekTa'. Ane mATe enI patnI ane sthAnika mitrono sahayoga lIdho, amerikAnA eTalAnTA zaheranI hoTalonI rUbarU mulAkAta lIdhI. hoTela-mAliko sAthe vArtAlApa karyo. pahelAM to hoTalamAlikone Dereka kAyogo koI dIvAno AdamI lAgyo. Ama pheMkI devAtI nagaNya vastu mATe ATalo badho udhamAta zA mATe ? koIe salAha paNa ApI ke, bhAI Ajano jamAno to 'thro ave" saMskRtino che. saheja vAparo, na vAparo ane pheMkI do. vastune vAparavAno jeTalo mahimA che, enAthIya vizeSa mahimA ene pheMkI devAno che. bleDathI eka-be vakhata zeviMga karyuM ane te pheMkI do. rejhara thoDuM vAparyuM ane navI jAtanuM lAvo. selathI AkarSAIne kapaDAMnI dhUma kharIdI karo ane pachI emAMthI moTA bhAganAM kapaDAM pheMkI do. Dereka kAyongo A duniyAne barAbara pahecAnato hato, AthI sahunI salAha e zAMta citte sAMbhaLato hato. Aphrikana bALakonI behAla paristhitino e citAra Apato, tyAre keTalAka ema kahetA ke emAM amane amerikAvAsIone zuM ? to keTalAka ema kahetA ke AvI paLojaNamAM 58 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI paDavA ame taiyAra nathI. vaLI sAbunI goTIo bhegI kare koNa ? hoTalamAM hAusa-kIpiMga karanArA saphAI karaze ke goTIo ekaThI karaze ? paNa Dereka kAyonga himmata hAryo nahIM. niSphaLatA maLatI hatI. enA mitro enI A mathAmaNa joIne kyAreka mUMjhavaNa paNa anubhavatA hatA. amerikA jevA dezamAM kone AvI paravA hoya ? ane tyAre Dereka kAyongo emane hiMmata Apato. dhIre dhIre eTalAnTAnI keTalIka hoTeloe A dIvAnAne sAtha Apyo. samaya jatAM amerikAnI traNaso jeTalI hoTalo A sAbunI goTIonA ekatrIkaraNamAM joDAI ane enuM pariNAma e AvyuM ke ekaso Tana jeTalo sAbu ekatrita thayo. emAM keTalIka hoTalo to potAnuM nAma dharAvatI spezyala sAbunI goTI rAkhatI hatI. evI goTIo paNa maLI ane keTalIka UMcI kakSAnI sAbunI goTIo paNa dAnasvarUpe maLI, je eka goTInI kiMmata 27 DaoNlara jeTalI hatI. Dereka kAyAngoe eTalAnTA zaherane potAnI 'globala zopa projekTa' yojanAnuM mukhya mathaka banAvyuM. ahIM enI sahAya mATe enI patnI ane mitro uparAMta bIjA svayaMsevako paNa AvI caDyAM. dariyAkinAre moTuM godAma rAkhyuM. ahIM ekatrita thayelI goTIonI pharI prakriyA karIne enAM paeNkeTa banAvavA mAMDyAM. A vAta dhIre dhIre vahetI thaI. amerikAnI bIjI hoTalo paNa kAyanconA projekTamAM joDAI ane e paNa sAbunI goTIo ekaThI karIne dariyAI mArge kAyongonI eTalAnTAmAM AvelI vakhAramAM mokalavA lAgI. A sAbunI goTIo ekaThI thAya pachI enA para thatI prakriyA vize kAyonga kahe che, "ame sAbunI goTIo mizrita karatA nathI, kAraNa ke khAsa paddhati dvArA sAratva, tejAbIpaNuM, sugaMdha ane raMga vagerenuM parIkSaNa karAya che. pahelAM to ame tene jaMturahita karIe chIe, pachI tene UMcA uSNatAmAne garamI ApIne atyaMta ThaMDI pADIe chIe ane chevaTe goTIo mujaba kApIe chIe. A prakriyA sAdI che, paNa khUba zrama mAgI le che." A sAbunI goTIno eka jaththo dariyAI mArge ravAnA karatAM pUrve enA thoDA namUnAonI tapAsa paNa thAya che. koI binapakSIya anya vyaktinI bhItarano avAja * 59

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prayogazALAmAM enI cakAsaNI karavAmAM Ave che ke emAM koI roganAM jaMtuo to nathI ne ! e svAthya mATe pUrNa rUpe salAmata che evo abhiprAya meLavAya che ane e pachI A globala zopa projekTa' tenAM sahayogI saMgaThano sAthe maLI dariyAmArge A sAbunI goTIo mokale che. A sAbunI goTIo jarUriyAtavALA garIba lokone sIdhesIdhI vinAmUlya vaheMcavAmAM Ave che. kAyongo pote yugAnDA choDIne kenyAmAM vasyo hato. ahIM e jAte pAMca hajAra sAbunI goTIo sAthe eka anAthAzramamAM gayo hato. eNe enA anubhavanI vAta karatAM kahyuM, 'ame sAbunI goTI vaheMcatA hatA, tyAre huM uttejanA, AnaMda ane apAra sukhanI lAgaNI anubhavato hato.' Dereka kAyongonA 'globala zopa projekTa' dvArA dara aThavADiye trIsa hajAra sAbunI goTIo utpanna thAya che. trIsa jeTalA dezone eNe AvarI lIdhA che. kenyA, ghAnA, yugAnDA, haitI, mAlavI, irAka ane aphaghAnistAna sudhInA dezonA jarUriyAtamaMda lokone potAnI A goTIo pahoMcADI rahyo che ane je eTalAnTA zaheramAM eNe potAnI A kAmagIrI bajAvI, e eTalAnTA zahere Dereka kAyongone khUba biradAvyo, eTaluM ja nahIM, paNa eka navo mArga zodhI ApanAra A mAnavIne dhanyavAda ApatAM eTalAnTA zaheranI kAunsile 15mI menA divasane 'globala zopa projekTa De' tarIke jAhera karyo Dereka kAyongonI sAbu riphAinanI phekTarI e kahe che, 'niSphaLatA e saphaLa zreSThatAnI janmadAtrI che. saphaLatA e niSphaLatAnI ja vaMzaja che. niSphaLatA vagara saphaLatAnI kasoTI thaI zakatI nathI. kyAreka tame tamArA dhyeyane siddha karavA jAo, tyAre niSphaLatAnI kaparI ghaTanA tamane saphaLatA taraphanI tamArI saphara keTalI AkarI hatI enI yAda apAvavA mATe aDaga UbhI rahe che. bhaviSyamAM niSphaLatAnI zakti para dhyAna Apo, kAraNa ke tenAmAM tamArI saphaLatAnA bhaviSya mATe mAhitagAra karavAnI kSamatA rahelI che." Aje to Dereka kAyongo aneka samAja sevI saMsthAomAM agrima pada meLavI cukyo che. 2011nI sI.ena.ena.nA 'hIro'nuM biruda pAmyo che. vIseka jeTalI samAcAra saMsthAo ane keTalAya TIvI kAryakramomAM enI noMdha levAI, ethIya vizeSa zaheranA kaoNrporezanathI mAMDIne yunivarsiTI sudhInA zrotAone jussAbhera 'strIonA adhikAro', vepAramAM strIonI tejasvI bhUmikA', 'sAmAjika sAhasavRtti', '21mI sadImAM saphaLa udyoganI tAlIma' jevA viSayo para chaTAdAra vaktavya Ape che. e viSayanI pUrNa taiyArI sAthe pravacano Ape che ane emAM enA vicAro reDe che. apAra muzkelIo veThIne kaoNlejano snAtaka ane amerikAno nAgarika banelo Dereka kAyogo AMtararASTrIya 'kera' saMsthAno ko-orDineTara paNa che. 60 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI bhItarano avAja * 61

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7 caMdagI rAma bhAratasarI hariyANAnA hisAra jillAnA sisAya gAmane pAdara AvelA khetaramAM eka chokaro beTho che. enuM nAma che caMdagI rAma. bAjumAM lAkaDI ane hAthamAM gophaNa che. e gophaNa vIMjhIne pakSIone uDADe che ane khetaramAM Dhora ghUsI na jAya te mATe rakhevALI kare che. evAmAM enI najara potAnA khetaranI vADa pAse jAya che. doDIne caMdagI rAma khetaranI vADa pAse jAya che. jue che to be pADA sAmasAmA laDI rahyA hatA. chokarAne to bhAre majA paDI. ene thayuM, vAha, kevI barAbaranI kustI jAmI che ! AmAM eka pADo khUba jADo, taMdurasta ane alamasta hato to bIjo sAva pAtaLo hato. zarUAtamAM to sthULakAya pADo khUba jorathI pAtaLA pADA para tUTI paDyo. ema thayuM ke hamaNAM A pAtaLA pADAnA rAma ramI jaze, paNa pAtaLo pADo ema pAcho paDe tema na hato. e capaLatAthI kUdIne jADA pADAnA ghA cUkavavA mAMDyo. pelA alamasta pADAnI mahenata nakAmI jatI. e dhUMdhavAIne khUba jorathI mAthuM jhIMko tyAre pAtaLo pADo saheja bAjue khasIne eno ghA cUkavI deto. pachI tarata ja pelA jADA pADAnI garadana para potAnuM mAthuM vIMjhato. thoDI vAramAM to alamasta pADo hAMphI gayo. pAtaLA pADAe sapATa bolAvavA mAMDyo ane enI garadana para kustI karatA caMdagI rAma mAthuM jhIkIne jADA pADAne harAvI dIdho. jADo pADo hAratAM caMdagI rAma to khuza thaIne tAlI pADavA lAgyo. AnaMdathI nAcavA lAgyo. doDIne pAtaLA pADAne thAbaDavA lAgyo. ekAeka e vicAramAM paDI gayo. ene thayuM ke bhale mAruM zarIra pAtaLuM hoya, paNa ethI mUMjhAvAnI kazI jarUra nathI. pelA jADA tagaDA pADAne pelA majabUta ane sphUrtivALA pADAe kevo harAvI dIdho. zarIra jADuM hoya tethI kaMI na vaLe, kharI jarUra to capaLa, majabUta ane sphUrtivAna dehanI che. dUbaLA-pAtaLA caMdagI rAmane jorAvara thavAnAM svapnAM AvavA lAgyAM. koI vAra rAte evuM svapnuMya jue ke potAnAthI ghaNI moTI kAyAvALA pahelavAnone e jamIna para cIta karI rahyo che. caMdagI rAmanA pitA mAMDUrAmanI to evI icchA hatI ke chokarAne bhaNAvI-gaNAvIne sArI nokarI apAvavI. zAMtinI nokarI maLe ne jIvana sukhe pasAra thAya. A caMdagI rAma akhADAmAM jaIne kustInA dAva khele evI to saheje icchA nahIM. AthI ene akhADAne badale abhyAsamAM ja DUbelo rAkhavA lAgyA. evAmAM eka karuNa banAva banyo. caMdagInA moTA bhAI TekarAmanuM covIsa varSanI yuvAna vaye mRtyu thayuM. mAMDUrAma para to jANe Abha tUTI paDyuM. have caMdagI rAma para ja gharano saghaLo AdhAra hato. enA zarIrano bhAratakesarI * 63

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bAMdho majabUta bane te mATe dhyAna ApavA lAgyA, akhADAmAM jaIne kustI khelavAnI teo svayaM preraNA ApavA lAgyA. caMdagI rAmane to je joItuM hatuM, e sAme cAlIne maLyuM. caMdagI rAmanA kAkA sadArAma to potAnA jamAnAmAM eka vikhyAta pahelavAna tarIke moTI nAmanA dharAvatA hatA. jyAre juo tyAre emanA kapALe akhADAnI lAla mATI lAgelI ja hoya. caMdagI rAma kAkA pAsethI kustInA dAvapecanI barAbara tAlIma levA mAMDyo. enA kAkA sadArAme mRtyu pathArIethI mAMDUrAmane caMdagInI barAbara saMbhALa levA jaNAvyuM ane kahetA gayA ke Ane be maNa ghI Apajo. pahelavAnImAM e khAnadAnanuM nAma rozana karaze. caMdagI rAmano janma 1937nI navamI navembare hariyANAnA eka garIba jATa parivAramAM thayo hato. pahelavAnImAM jema jema AgaLa vadhato gayo tema tema paisAnI jarUra paDavA mAMDI. aDhAra varSanA caMdagI rAme muDhAla nAmanA gAmanI eka sarakArI nizALamAM citrazikSakanI nokarI svIkArI. savAre kustInA dAva khele, bapore bALakone zIkhave. nizALanI ramatagamatanI pravRtti paNa caMdagI rAma ja calAve, khUbI to e thaI ke caMdagI rAmane pahelavAna tarIke nahIM, paNa zikSaka tarIke sahu oLakhavA lAgyA. e mAstara caMdagI rAma' tarIke jANItA thayA. nizALanuM e biruda akhADAmAM paNa jANItuM thaI gayuM. zikSaka tarIke maLatA pagAramAMthI pahelavAnInuM kAma cAlavA mAMDyuM. ogaNIsa varSano aMdagI rAma pahelI kustI potAnA ja gAmamAM kustIbAja harisiMha sAme laDyo. meLAno divasa Ave tyAre gAmanA kustIbAjo potAnI tAkAta batAve. A kustImAM baMne sarakhA UtaryA, koInIya hAra thaI nahIM. caMdagI rAma paga vALIne besI rahenAro kustIbAja na hato. e vicAramAM paDyo ke potAnI jIta kema na thAya ? ene thayuM ke hajI pote pahelavAnImAM pUrepUro uttIrNa thayo nathI. A mATe hajI vadhAre sAdhanAnI jarUra che. sAdhanA karavA mATe zikSakanI jarUra. guru vinA jJAna kyAMthI maLe ? caMdagI rAma gurunI zodhamAM nIkaLyo. Akhare ekavIsa varSanA caMdagI rAmane 195nA Disembara mahinAmAM guru maLI gayA. | 64 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI harIpha kustIbAjane cIta karavA dAva ajamAvatA caMdagI rAma jamanA nadInA kudasiyA ghATa para ciraMjI guruno akhADo cAle. caMdagInA kAkA sadArAmane paNa emaNe ja kustI zIkhavI hatI. caMdagI rAma to gurunA caraNamAM paDyo ane kahyuM, "gurudeva ! bhale pAtaLo houM, paNa pahelavAna thavA mAguM chuM. Apa kahezo teTalI mahenata karIza. kahezo teTaluM kAma karIza, paNa mane Apano ziSya banAvo." - ciraMjI guru caMdagI rAmanI laganI joI khuza thayA. kustIvidyAno emane vizALa anubhava hato. teo potAnA ziSyane avanavA dAvapeca zIkhavavA lAgyA. A pachI to caMdagI rAma IrAnanA ustAda kustIbAja pAsethI nelsana nAmano dAva zIkhyo. 1960mAM bAvIsa varSanA aMdagI rAme moTI moTI kustIomAM nAmanA meLavavA mAMDI. A varSe te lAiTa-veiTanI spardhAmAM rASTrIya vijetA banyo. 196ramAM pAtaLA caMdagI rAme 'hiMda kesarI'nI spardhAmAM jhukAvyuM. 'hiMda kesarI'nI spardhAmAM je vijaya pAme, e samagra dezano zreSTha pahelavAna gaNAya. AmAM pAtaLA caMdagI rAmane mahAkAya zarIravALA pahelavAnono sAmano karavAno Avyo. enI pAtaLI kAyA joIne sahu vicAre ke A pAtaLo pahelavAna vaLI zuM karI zakaze? gajarAja jevI kAyA dharAvatA pahelavAnomAM Avo pAtaLo mAnavI vaLI kyAMthI AvI caDyo ? bhAratakesarI * 65

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tAkAtano khajAno gaNAtA pahelavAna lakSmaNa kAkatI sAmeno mukAbalo ghaNo kaparo hato. lamaNamAM eTalI tAkAta hatI ke ene sau khaDaga kahetA, paraMtu caMdagI rAme A baLiyA pahelavAna sAme evo to dAva ajamAvyo ke mahAkAya lakSmaNa muMjhAI gayo. caMdagI rAmanI pakaDamAMthI e khaDaga chUTI zake tema na hato. parAjaya svIkAravA sivAya ene mATe kazuM bAkI rahyuM nahIM. chello mukAbalo mAruti baDhAra putra jagadIza sAthe nAmanA pahelavAna sAthe thayo. mAruti jabaro dAvapeca khelanAro. enA jhaDapI dAva AgaLa bhalabhalA pahelavAno bhAMgI paDatA. vizALa kAyA dharAvato mAruti akhADAmAM pravezyo. sAmethI be hAthe 'praNAma' karato caMdagI rAma Avyo. mahAkAya mAruti sAme Ubhelo caMdagI rAma kRSNanI sAme UbhelA sudAmA jevo lAgato hato, paNa caMdagI rAmano peMtaro saphaLa thayo. mArutine evo mUMjhavyo ke medAna choDIne bhAgI javuM paDyuM. enA dAvapeca to e ja bhUlI gayo ! 1968mAM 'bhArata kesarI'nI spardhA yojAI. AmAM aMtima spardhAmAM caMdagI rAmane maheradIna nAmanA vikhyAta pahelavAnano sAmano karavAnuM AvyuM. cha phUTa ane be iMca UMcA caMdagI rAmanI jhaDapathI cha phUTa ane pAMca iMca UMcA ane caMdagI rAmathI be varSa moTA evA mahAkAya mahedIna bebhAna thaIne DhaLI paDyA. mAtra pAMtrIsa miniTamAM ja maheradInano parAjaya thayo. 1969mAM to caMdagI rAme kamAla karI. 'bhArata kesarI' thavA mATe akhADAmAM pAMca jaMgalamAM UtaravuM paDyuM. A pAMce daMgalamAM kula paMdara miniTa ane agiyAra sekanDa kustI khelIne 'bhArata kesarI'no khitAba meLavyo. paMjAbanA surajitasiMghane eka miniTa ane trIsa sekanDamAM harAvyo. dilhInA bhagavAnasiMhane aDatAlIsa sekanDamAM ja hAra khAIne bhAgavuM paDyuM. paMjAbanA banyasiMghane be miniTa ane ekAvana sekanDamAM hAra khAIne bhAgavuM paDyuM. paMjAbano sukhavaMtasiMha be miniTa ane sattara sekanDa sudhI ja sAmano karI zakyo. chelle potAnA purANA harIpha maheradInane sAta miniTa ane pistAlIsa sekanDamAM mAta karyo. caMdagI rAmane eka daMgala jItavAmAM sarerAza traNa miniTa ane be sekanDano samaya lAgyo ! 'bhArata kesarI' caMdagI rAmanI chaTA kesarI jevI ja rahI. koI kustIbAda enI tAkAtanI garjanA AgaLa bhAratakesarI caMdagI rAma TakI zakyA nahIM. moTI kAyAvALA pahelavAnone harAvIne caMdagIrAme potAnA bALapaNanuM svapna sAkAra karyuM. caMdagI rAma saMpUrNa zAkAhArI hatA. roja pAzera badAmanI mIMja , pA zera ghI, traNa zera dUdha athavA dahIM, thoDAM ghaNAM phaLa ane lIlAM zAkabhAjI letA. caMdagI rAma mAdaka padArtho letA nahIM temaja emane dArU ke anya koI vyasana nahIM. enI jIvanazailI UgatA pahelavAnone preraka banI rahI. AvA zAkAhArI pahelavAne potAnAthI pacIsa kilo vadhu vajana dharAvanArA pahelavAnone paNa pachADI dIdhA. caMdagI rAmane bhAratIya kustI pasaMda hatI ane vizALa khyAti maLI hovA chatAM eka bhAratIya kheDUtanI jema jIvavAmAM ene gauravano anubhava thayo hato. bhAratamAM khelAtI kustI para caMdagI rAmanI hAka vAgatI hatI. hiMda kesarI, bhArata kesarI, bhArata bhIma, mahAbhArata kesarI jevI badhI spardhAomAM vijetA banIne e tamAma biruda meLavI gayo. beMgakokanI eziyAI spardhAmAM jApAna ane IrAnanA nAmAMkita pahelavAnone harAvI caMdagI rAma suvarNacaMdraka meLavyo hato. pahelavAna gAmA pachI koI bhAratIya pahelavAnane ATalI nAmanA maLI nahotI. caMdagI rAmane arjuna eNvaoNrDa ane 'padmazrI' jevAM rASTrIya sanmAno maLyAM. 197ranI oNlimpikamAM emaNe bhAga lIdho. 66 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI bhAratakesarI + 67

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abola bALakono avAja jaipha vaye caMdagI rAma AMtararASTrIya stare bhAratIya mahilAo kustImAM AgaLa vadhI zake, te mATe akhADo sthApavAnI mAsTara caMdagI rAme pahela karI. 2010nI 29mI jUne hRdayaroganA humalAne kAraNe caMdagI rAmanuM avasAna thayuM, paNa emanI putrIo dIpikA, sonikA ane putra jagadIza dezanA uttama kustIbAjomAM gaNanA pAmyAM. gaIkAlano nizALano mAstare caMdagI rAma pahelavAnomAM 'mAstara' banyo. garIba mA-bApanA eka dUbaLA-pAtaLA paNa dRDhanizcayI chokarA caMdagI rAme bhAratIya kustImAM sarvottama mAna hAMsala karyuM che. mana hoya to mALave javAya, te AnuM nAma ! gulAmInA damanano koraDo vIMjhAto hoya, yuddhanI bhayAvaha saMhAralIlA cAlatI hoya, saramukhatyAranI nirdayatA mAnavIone vIMdhatI hoya ane bhUkhamarAnI bhabhUkatI vedanA bhegI maLe, tyAre A jagata para ane garIba prajA para mahAabhizApa varase che. dharatIne sonerI banAvavAnAM svapnAM sevanArI mAnavajAtie vAraMvAra AvI bhayAvaha paristhitino sAmano karyo che ane hajIye karI rahI che. dvitIya vizvayuddhano e samaya hato. jyAre jarmanInA saramukhatyAra hiTalaranA bephAma mAnavasaMhArathI bacavA mATe yuropanA loko jIva bacAvIne eka dezamAMthI bIjA dezamAM lapAtA-chupAtA hatA. emAMya yahUdI prajAne mAthe to motano koraDo vIMjhAto hato. yahudIone Traka ane TrenamAM ThAMsI-ThAMsIne pUravAmAM AvatA hatA ane gesa cembaramAM oDrI hepabarna 68 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI

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ThAlavIne rAkha banAvI devAmAM AvatA hatA. AvA viSama kALamAM nAnakaDI hepabaneM ghaNI vakhata relave sTezana para UbhA rahIne yahUdIone TrenamAM lAdIne laI javAtA joyA hatA. nAnAM bALakathI mAMDIne gharaDAM vRddhone dhakkA mArIne emAM caDAvI devAtAM hatAM. durbhAgye hepabarnanA pitA josephane nAjhIo pratye sabhAva hato ane enAM mAtApitAnuM dAmpatyajIvana lAMbuM TakyuM nahIM. enA pitA josepha kuTuMba choDIne iMglenDamAM vasavA cAlyA gayA ane pachI emanA koI kheta ke khabara nahotA. yuddhanA othArathI bacavA mATe hepabarna iMglenDa gaI ane elhAmanI eka nAnakaDI zALAmAM abhyAsa zarU karyo. A zALAmAM mAtra 14 bALako abhyAsa karatAM hatAM. evAmAM vaLI samaya palaTAyo. 1939nA sapTembaramAM briTane jarmanI sAme yuddha jAhera karyuM. jarmana tAbAnA anahemamAMthI briTana AvelI hepabarnanI mAtA potAnI dIkarI sAthe aranahemamAM pAchI pharI. eNe mAnyuM hatuM ke have briTana ane jarmanI vacce yuddha khelAze. jo nedharalaeNnDa agAunI mAphaka taTastha raheze. to jarmana AkramaNakhorothI bacI jaze. aranahemanI konjharveTarImAM dAkhala thayelI hepabarna abhyAsanI sAthosAtha baeNlaeNTanI paNa tAlIma letI hatI. 1940mAM jarmanIe nedharalaeNnDa para AkramaNa karyuM. oDrI hemabarnane lAgyuM ke aMgrejI uccAravALuM enuM nAma jarmana sainikonA kAne paDaze to enuM jIvana tyAM ja pUruM thaI jaze. enA kAkA oTo vAnane to jarmanoe phAMsI ApI hatI ane enA eka sAvakA bhAIne dezanikAlanI sajA karIne jarmana lebara kempamAM kALI majUrI karavA mATe dhakelI devAyo hato. eno bIjo sAvako bhAI AvA dezanikAlathI bacavA mATe bhUgarbhamAM cAlyo gayo hato. hepabaneM enuM nAma badalIne iDA vAna hImasTrA evuM nAma dhAraNa karyuM. yuddha samayanI kaThora paristhiti hatI ane e samaye nedharalenDa para bhUkhamarAnA bhayAnaka oLA UtaryA. A bhUkhamaro 'dha haMgara vinTara' tarIke jANIto banyo. enA khapparamAM vIsa hajAra jeTalA Daca loko homAI gayA. khuda hepabarna paNa kupoSaNano bhoga banI, zvAsanI takalIpha zarU thaI. zarIra sAva phikku paDI gayuM ane tenA para sojA AvyA. samaya jatAM 70 + mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI As you grow older, you jaLodaranI bImArI lAgu will discover that you have two hands, one for paDI. bIjI bAju hemabarna helping yourself the other for baeNlaeNTa DAnsara tarIke helping others. Retry om jANItI hovAthI DAnsa karIne paisA ekaThI karatI hatI. e paisAthI bhUkhamarAmAM sapaDAyelAM lokone madada karatI hatI. vaLI Daca prajAnA pratikAra mATe keTalAMka maMDaLomAM jaIne nRtya karI paisA ekaThA karatI hatI. kyAreka nAjhIonA sAmanAne mATe e apaMga ane kupoSaNano zikAra bALakonI belI saMdezAnI Apale karavAnuM ke koI pekeTa levAApavAnuM kuriyaranuM kAma paNa karatI hatI. motanA mukhamAM e vasatI hatI. eNe joyuM ke bhUkhamarAnI bhUtAvaLa nagna nAca khelI rahI hatI. 1944nA ziyALA daramiyAna bhUkhamarAthI taraphaDatI Daca prajAne raheMsI nAkhavA mATe jarmanoe je mArge anAja AvatuM hatuM, e mArga ja baMdha karI dIdho. loko zerIomAM bhUkhathI TaLavaLavA lAgyAM. mANaso ribAI ribAIne maravA lAgyAM. bALako A duniyA para AMkha kholatAM ane thoDA samayamAM ja sadAne mATe AMkha mIMcI detAM. khuda hemabarna ane bIjA lokone jIvavA mATe TyulipanA kaMdanA loTamAMthI banAvelAM kaeNka ane biskiTa khAvAM paDyAM. bALapaNanA A anubhavoe hemabarnane eka vAta samajAvI ke mAnavajAta para AvatI ghaNI Aphato e kudaratI Aphato hotI nathI, paraMtu mAnavasarjita Aphato hoya che. jiMdagInI rAha para hepabarna AgaLa vadhatI gaI. 1948mAM eNe abola bALakono avAja * 71

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esTaraDAmamAM soniyA gAskela pAse baeNlaeNTano abhyAsa karyo ane e pachI korasa garla tarIke pAtra paNa bhajavyuM. jiMdagInAM AraMbhanAM varSonA rajhaLapATane kAraNe e aMgrejI, phreMca, Daca, iTAliyana, speniza ane jarmana jevI bhASAo AsAnIthI bolI zakatI hatI. baeNlaeNTa (nRtya) e eno pahelo prema hato. vizvayuddha pUruM thayA pachI e laMDana pAchI pharI. maoNDaliMga ane adAkArI zarU karI. 1951mAM oDI hepabarnanI bhalAmaNa karI ane e divasathI 1980 sudhI enI kalAyAtrA vaNathaMbhI cAlI rahI. oDI hepabarne kalAkSetre aneka UMcAM zikharo sara karyo. 1953mAM teNe 'romana haoNliDemAM gregarI peka sAthe mukhya abhinetrI tarIkenuM pAtra bhajavyuM ane zreSTha abhinetrI tarIkeno ekeDemI eNvaoNrDa meLavyo. e ja varSe 'onDAina'mAM pAtra bhajavI zreSTha abhinetrIno TonI eNvaoNrDa paNa jItyo. e pachI eka dasakA sudhI hepabarna haoNlivuDanA nAmAMkita abhinetA sAthe 'sabarInA', 'phanI pheisa' ane 'lava ina dha AphTaranUna' calacitramAM khUba nAmanA meLavI. eka advitIya abhinetrI tarIke hepabaneM 'brekaphAsTa eNTa TiphanIjha' mATe cotho oskara eNvaoNrDa meLavyo. tyArabAda saMgItamaDhI prakhyAta philma "mAya phaMra leDI' (1964)mAM abhuta eNkTiga karI aneka abhinetrIone pAchI pADI dIdhI. traNa varSa pachI te samayanA tenA prathama pati pheraranI (tao 1954mAM paraNyA hatA) philma 'veiTa anTila DArka'mAM kAma karIne pAMcamo aMkeDemI eNvaoNrDa hAMsala karyo. sIna konerInI 'robina hUDa'mAM (1976) teNe mAriyana tarIkenuM pAtra bhajavyuM. holIvuDanA suvarNayugamAM nAmAMkita abhinetrI tarIke oDrI hepabarna eka 'lijanDa' banI gaI. bALapaNamAM eNe AMtaravigrahane pariNAme rUMdhAtI ane pisAtI mAnavajAtane joI hatI. bhukhane kAraNe taraphaDI taraphaDIne marI jatAM hADapiMjarone nIrakhyAM hatAM. vaLI AMtaravigraha ane bhUkhamarAnI hAlatamAMthI UgarI gayAM hoya tevAM paNa moTebhAge kupoSaNano bhoga banatAM hatAM. emAMnAM keTalAMka viTAmina 'e 'no abhAva hovAne kAraNe aMdhApAno bhoga banatAM hatAM. A badhA lokonI vedanA oDrI hemabarnanA hRdayane kaMpAvI detI hatI. 72 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI eNe vicAra karyo ke | have yuddhathI pIDita ane bhUkhathI trasta evA asahAya lokonA AdhArarUpa banavuM che. 29oriTI jagatanI svarUpavAna mahilAne 'yunisepha' sa' 2 | | | mAnavatAvAdI guDavila eNmbeseDara tarIke atyaMta garIba evA sAta dezomAM jaIne mAnavatAbharyuM kArya garIba bALako sAthe oDDI hepabarna karavAnuM mizana soMpavAmAM AvyuM. eNe dilamAM eka manasUbo rAkhyo ke jyAM kyAMya mANasamANasa sAme lohI tarasyo banIne yuddha khelato hoya, prajA pisAtI hoya ane cotarapha behAlI hoya, enI madada mATe pahoMcI javuM. Ane mATe e pahelAM AMtaravigraha ane kupoSaNathI gherAI gayelA ithiyopiyA dezamAM pahoMcI gaI. ahIM eNe joyuM to yuddhane kAraNe loko jIva muThThImAM laIne nirvAsitonI chAvaNImAM Azaro letA hatA. e chAvaNImAM zvAsa levA sivAya bIjI koI sagavaDa ke mokaLAza nahotI. kyAMka rogiSTha loko paDyA hoya, to kyAMka koI vRddha ane enI paDakhe bALaka aMtima zvAsa letA hoya. mAnavadehane badale hADapiMja rono vasavATa hoya evuM lAgatuM hatuM ane satata phelAtA rogacALAne kAraNe e nirvAsitonI chAvaNI mRtyu mATenI chAvaNIo banI gaI hatI. e ithiyopiyAnA mekelenA anAthAzramamAM pahoMcI. ahIM bhUkhamarAne kAraNe mRtyu pAmelAM mAtA-pitAnAM anAtha bALako Azaro laIne beThAM hatAM. abola bALakono avAja * 73

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ahIM kaeNthalika carca dvArA anAthAzrama kholavAmAM Avyo hato, paraMtu e bhUkhyAM bALakone khavaDAvavA nahIM, paNa jivADavA mATeya koI anna nahotuM. hepabarnanuM A paheluM mizana hatuM ane emAM eNe pAMcaso bALako motanI chAyA heThaLa taraphaDatAM joyAM. enuM saMvedanazIla hRdaya A joIne kaMpI UThaDyuM. eNe AsapAsathI sahAya meLavavAno prayAsa karyo, paNa koNa madada kare ? oDrI hemabarna 'yunisepha' saMsthAne madada mATe vedanAbharyA hRdaye saMdezo mokalyo, 'mArAM A bALako mATe tame AhAra mokalI zakatA na ho, to emanI kabara khodavA mATe kodALIo ane pAvaDAo mokalo.' AsapAsanI paristhiti joIne oDI hepabarna bhAMgI paDI. AmAMthI lokone bacAvavAno koI ilAja ene dekhAto nahoto. bIjI bAju enI AsapAsa vIsa lAkha loko bhUkhamarAthI marI rahyAM hatAM. vaLI emAM sauthI moTI saMkhyA bALakonI ja hatI. anAja to AvIne eka baMdaranA kinAre ThalavAyuM hatuM, paraMtu e vaheMcI zakAyuM nahotuM. tethI oDI hepabarnano AtmA kakaLI UThyo. eNe joyuM ke A rAhata chAvaNImAM AvavA mATe keTalIya mAtAo enAM bhUlakAMo sAthe dasa dasa divasa sudhI ke traNa traNa aThavADiyAM sudhI bhaTakatI bhaTakatI AvI pahoMcI hatI. ujjaDa jagAmAM UbhI karavAmAM AvelI chAvaNImAM emane Azaro levo hato, paraMtu ahIM emane Azaro Ape evuM koI nahotuM. mAtra cotarapha 2jhaLatuM mota hatuM. kyAreka koI kahetuM ke A trIjI duniyAnI vAstavikatA che. A trIjI duniyA avikasita, garIba, azikSita ane AtaMkathI gherAyelI che, tyAre oDrI hemabarna gusse bharAIne kahetI, 'trIjI duniyA' zabda para ene bhAre napharata che. duniyA to e ka ja, temAM vasatAM mAnavIo sahu samAna che. vaLI trIjI duniyAmAM ja bhUkhamaro che ema kahevuM e paNa sAcuM nathI. hakIkata to e che ke A duniyA parano moTA bhAgano mAnavasamAja bhUkhamarAthI pIDAya che. khuda amerikA jevA samRddha dezamAM paNa Avo bhUkhamara che.' eNe joyuM ke duniyAmAM judA judA viSayo para carcAo cAle che, vivAdo cAle che, paNa ahIM roja keTalAMya bALako motane zaraNe jAya che, ene vize koI eka harapha paNa uccAratuM nathI. A aThavADiye, agAunA aThavADiye ane 74 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI oDI hepabarna AvatA aThavADiye ema kula aDhI lAkha bALako motane zaraNe thayAM che. mAnavajAti A ghaTanA pratye mauna sevatI hatI. koInA dilamAM Ane mATe koI karuNA jAgatI nahotI, paNa AvI hRdayadrAvaka paristhitithI nirAza thavAne badale hepabaneM nakkI karyuM ke A badhuM koI paNa bhoge aTakavuM ja joIe! | ithiyopiyAmAM kAma karyA pachI turkastAna tarapha najara doDAvI. turkastAnanAM bALako bhayAvaha rogathI gherAI gayAM hatAM. orI, kSaya, dhanurvA, uTAMTiyuM, DiTTeriyA ane lakavAthI bALapaNamAM ja mota emanI bAjue AvIne UbhuM rahetuM. hepabarne bALakone rogamukta karavA mATe jhuMbeza calAvI. turkastAnanA rASTrapramukha ane vaDApradhAne Telivijhana para vaktavyo ApyAM. zALAnAM zikSakoe bALakone rogapratikAra mATenI paddhationI samajaNa ApI. dharmaguruoe emanA upadezomAM A vAta vaNI lIdhI. mAchalAM vecanArAoe emanAM veganomAM veksina laI javA mATenI vyavasthA karI abola bALakono avAja * 75

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ApI. lazkaroe Trako ApI ane pachI A rogamAMthI mukta thavA mATe AkhA dezamAM rasIkaraNano prAraMbha thayo ane aMte dezanAM bALakonA mRtyudara ocho thayo. oDI hepabarnanuM trIju mizana dakSiNa amerikA ane madhya amerikA hatuM. venejhuelA ane ikvADoramAM nAnA nAnA parvatonI hAramALAnI vacce AvelI jhUMpaDapaTTIomAM bALakone pANInA sAMsA paDatA hatA ane zikSaNano bhAre abhAva hato. hepabarna yunisephanI madadathI A jhuMpaDapaTTImAM pANInI vyavasthA karI, tyAre sthAnika rahevAsIone ghera beThAM pANI maLe te ghaTanA ja camatkArarUpa lAgI. enuM bIjuM kAma zALAnAM makAno bAMdhavAnuM hatuM ane eTale yunisepha dvArA ApavAmAM AvelI IMTo ane simenTathI hepabaneM zALAnAM makAna bAMdhyAM ane pANInI achata ane zikSaNanI samasyA baMne hala karyA. e pachI eNe sudAna tarapha najara TheravI. dakSiNa sudAnamAM AMtaravigraha parAkASThAe pahoMcyo hato. cotarapha hAhAkAra macI gayo hato. loko bhAgatAM hatAM, nAsatAM hatAM, bhUkhathI maraNa pAmatAM hatAM ane keTalAMka bhUkhathI evAM taraphaDatAM hatAM ke nadImAM kUdako mArIne potAnuM jIvana TUMpAvI detAM hatAM. oDI hepabarna joyuM ke vIsa hajAra jeTalAM bhUkhathI TaLavaLatAM bALako AMtaravigrahathI gherAyelA sudAnamAMthI bhAgIne nAsI chUTyAM hatAM. pAzavI ane lohiyALa AMtaravigrahamAMthI UgaravAno koI mArga dekhAto nahoto. AmAMnAM ghaNAM bALako rastAmAM ja mRtyu pAmyAM athavA keTalAMka sudAnane ithiyopiyAthI judI pADatI nadImAM DUbI gayAM. oDI hepabaneM kahyuM, 'meM eka AMjI nAkhe evA satyane paNa nihALyuM hatuM. A kudaratI durghaTanAo nathI, paNa mAnavanirmita karuNatA che, jenA mATe phakta mAnavanirmita ukela ja hoI zake ane te che zAMti." oDrI hemabarna joyuM ke ahIM chokarIo ane mahilAone pANI meLavavA mATe mAIlo sudhI cAlavuM paDatuM hatuM. oDrI hepabaneM emane gharaAMgaNe pANI maLI rahe tevI vyavasthA karI ApI. pANI e ja A lokonI jiMdagI hatI ane cokhkhuM pANI e gAmaDAMmAM vasatAM bALako mATe svAthyanI auSadhi hatI. oDI hemabarna yunisephanA nejA heThaLa A kAma karatI eTale ahIMnA vatanIonA caherA para yunisephanuM nAma sAMbhaLatAM ja camaka AvI jatI hatI. e pachI oDrI hepabarnanuM pAMcamuM mizana bAMglA deza hatuM. bAMglA deza eka evo deza ke kAM kAramo duSkALa hoya athavA to pUranA pANI pharI vaLyAM hoya. muzkelIo sAthe eno sanAtana saMbaMdha. ahIM potAnA sevAkAryano prAraMbha karatAM pUrve oDrI hemabarna bAMglA dezamAM Thera Thera ghUmI vaLI. eka vAra oDrI hepabane potAnA sAthIne pUchavuM, 'jhona, A loko mane oLakhatA haze ? athavA kyAreya huM koNa chuM e jANavAnI khevanA rAkhatA haze ?' A samaye jhone najIkamAM ja be mANasone vAto karatAM sAMbhaLyA. eka vyakti bIjI vyaktine kahetI hatI ke 'mane lAge che ke A abhinetrI oDI hepabarna che." jyone hepabarnane A vAta karI, tyAre Azcaryacakita thayelI hepabarna emanI pAse dhasI gaI ane pUchavuM, 'tame mane oLakho cho?" pelI vyaktie javAba Apyo, 'meM tamArI 'romana haoNliDe' philma dasa vAra joI che ane te paNa A bAMglAdezanI madhyamAM.' hepabarna pAse ajANI vyaktionAM hRdaya jItavAnI adbhuta kaLA hatI. garIbo sAthe sAhajikatAthI saMbaMdha bAMdhI zakatI. emanI vedanAne tatkALa pAmI zakatI. emAM paNa bALako sAthe to e eTalI haLIbhaLI jatI ke jANe enI AsapAsa pataMgiyAM UDatAM hoya, ema bALako enI AsapAsa ghUmavA lAgyAM. e melAMghelAM gaMdAM bALakone saheje acakAyA vinA vahAlathI ramADatI bheTatI hatI. pelI kathAmAM Ave che tema vAMsaLIvALAnI pAchaLa jema bALako ApoApa cAlavA lAgyAM hatAM. e ja rIte hepabarnanI pAse bALako ghaDI jatAM hatAM. hepabarnane A bALakonA deha sAthe saMbaMdha nahoto. emanI kALI ke ghauMvarNI cAmaDI sAthe saMbaMdha nahoto. emanA dharma sAthe saMbaMdha nahoto, ene to e bALako sAthe saMbaMdha hato, jemanA pratye ene akhUTe karuNA hatI. kyAreka AvI yAtanAo joIne hepabarnane aphasosa paNa thato. e vicAratI ke Aje duniyA TaeNkanolaoNjIne kAraNe khUba najIka AvI gaI che. vyakti Aje eka jagAe hoya, kAle vaLI bIjI jagAe hoya ane 76 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI abola bALakono avAja * 777

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pachInA divase ethIya kyAMka dUra hoya. paNa ene kAraNe loko emanI AsapAsanI vedanA para dhyAna kendrita karI zakatA nathI. anya loko agAunI vedanAne ke yAtanAne bhUlI jAya che, paraMtu jeNe e vedanA ane yAtanA bhogavI che e ene jiMdagImAM kyAreya bhUlI zakatA nathI. vaLI hemabarge AgaLa najara karI. enuM chaThuM mizana viyetanAma hatuM. A viyetanAmamAM yuddha moTI tabAhI sarjI hatI. amerikAe enA para kALo kera vartAvyo hato. Ave samaye oDrI hepabarnane lokone rogamukta karavA mATe ane svaccha pANI upalabdha karAvavA mATenuM kArya soMpavAmAM AvyuM. eNe viyeTanAmanA vaDApradhAnane kahyuM, 'bALako mATenI ghaNI laDAIo ApaNe sAthe rahIne laDyA chIe. emAM ApaNe saphaLatA meLavI che. huM AzA rAkhuM chuM ke atyAra sudhI ApaNe yazasvI rahyA chIe tema rahIzuM ane bALakonA badhA ja rogo sAme ApaNe jIvana meLavIzuM.' hepabarnanuM sAtamuM mizana somAliyA hatuM. hepabaneM agAu ithiyopiyA ane bAMglA dezamAM bhUkhamaro joyo hato, paraMtu somAliyAmAM jevo bhUkhamaro joyo, te joIne e jI UThI. A vedanAe jANe enI vAcA harI lIdhI. eka evI akathya paristhiti hatI ke mAtra vedanAno ghUghavato dariyo vaheto hato. e nAirobIthI kisAmAlinI havAI sapharamAM eNe joyuM ke dharatI asAdhAraNa rIte raktabhInI dekhAtI hatI. gAmaDAMo, visthApita chAvaNIono e vistAra hato. eka arthamAM kahIe to ahIM je koI rahetA hatA, e badhA AkharI zvAso gaNI rahyA hatA. jyAM juo tyAM kabara dekhAtI hatI. rastAnI samAMtare nadInA kinAre ane dareka chAvaNI jANe kabrastAna na hoya ! somAliyAmAM kAma karavuM ghaNuM muzkela hatuM. hepabane A kAma karyuM, paraMtu joyuM to cotarapha narakanI vedanA anubhavI. e chAvaNImAM javA mATe koI taiyAra thatuM nahotuM. Aje je bALaka joyuM hoya, te bIje divase mRtyu pAmyuM hoya. hepabarne motanuM mahAtAMDava joyuM ane eNe enuM kAma zarU karyuM. e kahetI 'bALakonI saMbhALa levAnI bAbatane koI rAja kAraNa sAthe saMbaMdha nathI. maratA bALakane madada karavA mATe rAjakAraNa kaMI karavAnuM nathI. have mAnavatAvAdI madada mATenI rAjanItine badale dayALu banavA mATenI rAjanIti sthAna leze." 78 + mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI vedanAnAM A dRzyoe hepabarnane keTalAya divaso sudhI becena rAkhI. hepabarna potAne thayelA A anubhavone saMta jhonane thayelA sAkSAtkAranI sAthe sarakhAve che. hemabarnane amerikAnA pramukha jyorja buze dezano sauthI moTo presiDenDiAyala meDala oNpha phrIDama" enAyata karyo. 1993mAM oDI hepabarnanA peTamAM darda UpaDyuM. nidAna karatAM jANa thaI ke e bhAgye ja thatA kensarano bhoga banI che. losa enjalisanI haoNspiTalamAM enI sarjarI thaI, paNa enuM kensara prasaratuM aTakyuM nahIM. eNe dekhItI rIte kaeN motherApI levAno inkAra karyo. 1993nI 20mI jAnyuArIe svitjharlenDamAM 63 varSIya A abhinetrI korekTala kensarane kAraNe avasAna pAmI ane tyAM ja enI daphanavidhi thaI. cheka aMtima kSaNa sudhI niHsahAya ane nirdoSa bALako mRtyu pAmatAM hoya tenA vicAroe eno keDo na mUkyo. yunisephe nyUyorkanA enA mukhya kAryAlayamAM 'dha spiriTa oNpha oDI' pratimAnuM anAvaraNa karIne hemabarnane aMjali ApI. A hemabarne kahelA e zabdo AjanI mAnavajAtane mATe paNa eTalA ja prastuta che. eNe kahyuM, 'ApaNe ApaNI AjubAju joIe chIe, tyAre lAge che ke gaIkAle ApelAM vacanonuM pAlana thayuM nathI. loko kAramI garIbImAM jIve che. hajI bhUkhyAM che ane jIvavA mATe jhajhUmI rahyAM che. e lokonI vacce ApaNe bALakone joIe chIe. haMmezAM moTAM thayelAM emanAM peTane joIe chIe. emanI udAsa AMkho joIe chIe. emanA DahApaNabharyA caherA emaNe varSothI sahelI vedanAne batAve che. vikasita duniyAnA rAkSasI devAnI asare garIba dezane vadhu garIba banAvI dIdho che ane ati jarUriyAtanA samaye ene bhAMgI paDelo banAvI dIdho che. yuddha sauthI vadhAre nukasAna strIo ane bALakone karyuM che, tethI huM e bALako je potAnI vAta karI zakatAM nathI temanA mATeno avAja banIne boluM chuM." ane pachI e bALakonI vedanAne anubhavanArI oDrI hemabarna kahe che, 'viTAminanA abhAvane kAraNe e bALako aMdha banI gayAM che. poliyone kAraNe vikalAMga thaI gayAM che. pANInI achatane lIdhe temanuM jIvana verAna ebola bALakono avAja * 79

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banI gayuM che. vizvamAM Azare eka karoDa bALakone jIvatAM rahevA mATe gharabAra. choDavAM paDe che. emanI pAse hiMmata, smita ane svapna sivAya kAMI ja nathI. e nirdoSa bALakone koI dumana nathI, chatAM raNamedAna vagaranA yuddhamAM e prathama nAnakaDAM zikAra banyAM che. jya, dhAkadhamakI ane nirdayI kaleAmano bhoga banyAM che. hiMsAnA bhayamAM lAkho bALako nirvAsita banyAM che.' oDI hepabarnano e avAja AjanI duniyAmAM paNa eTalo ja yathArtha AkAza mArI muThThImAM ekavIsa varSanI munibA majhArI balucistAnamAM saphara karI rahI hatI. evAmAM kAranA DrAivarane aNadhAryuM eka jhokuM AvI jatAM AkhI moTara UMDI khINamAM gabaDI paDI. akasmAtanI A ghaTanA najare jonArane to ema lAge ke AmAMthI ekeya vyakti salAmata rahI nahIM hoya. 21 varSanI munibAne mAMDa mAMDa khAImAMthI bahAra kADhavAmAM AvI. Aja thI sAta varSa pahelAM balucistAnamAM dardIne haoNspiTalamAM laI javA mATe koI eNbyulansa nahotI, AthI munibAne jIpamAM mUkavAmAM AvI. enAM hADakAM-pAMsaLAM khokharAM thaI gayAM hatAM. karoDarajjunI bhAre bUrI dazA thaI hatI. eNe najIkanA lokone pUchavuM, are, mArA paga kyAM che ?' enA pagamAM koI saMvedanA nahotI, tethI eNe Avo savAla karyo hato. paricitoe kahyuM, 'A rahyA tArA paga, munibA majhArI 80 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI

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kAra akasmAta ane pachI haoNspiTalamAM paNa tAruM aDadhuM aMga khoTuM paDI gayuM che ane tethI tane kazI saMvedanA thatI nathI.' eka haoNspiTalamAMthI bIjI haoNspiTalamAM phaMgoLAyA pachI Akhare karAMcInI eka hospiTalamAM ane sAravAra ApavAmAM AvI. enA eka svajane akasmAtanI vItakakathA pUchI, to A dRDha manobaLa dharAvatI nirbhaya mahilAe sahajatAthI kahyuM, 'e samaye mArA hAtha-khabhAnuM hADakuM tUTI gayuM hoya ema mane lAgatuM hatuM. aDadhuM zarIra sAva khoTuM paDI gayuM hatuM. baMne paga lakavAgrasta banI gayA hatA.' munibAne atyaMta zArIrika darda temaja apAra mAnasika pIDA thatI hatI, paraMtu mana makkama rAkhIne AMkhamAM AMsu AvavA dIdhAM nahIM. e veLAe to ene jIvavAnI kazI AzA nahotI. enA para traNa gaMbhIra oNparezana thayAM ane bIjAM be nAnAM oNparezana thayAM, paNa munibAnI makkamatA saheje caLI nahIM. AnuM kAraNa zuM ? potAnI e samayanI manaHsthiti vyakta karatAM munibAe kahyuM, 'jyAre tame eTaluM jANatA ho ke tame kaMIka gumAvI beThA cho to tame raDI zakatA nathI.' enI pAse hiMmata hatI, daDhatA hatI. e jANatI hatI ke e kyAreya punaH agAu jevI svastha thaze nahIM. enAM dardo vizenAM DaoNkTaronAM parAmarza sAMbhaLatI hatI. enI najara sAme ja enA badhA eksa-re paDyA hatA. manamAM evo pAko khyAla paNa hato ke karoDarajjunA traNa maNakA tUTI gayA che ane have e kyAreya jAte cAlI zakaze nahIM. vaLI ene maLatI sAravAramAM paNa kSatio hatI. maeNDikala sAravAra 82 * mATIe ghacAM mAnavI guNavattAyukta nahIM hovAthI enA pagamAM sojA AvI gayA. be varSa sudhI e pathArImAM paDI rahI. e enA pagane thapathapAvatI hatI, paraMtu emAMthI saMvedanAno koI aNasAra Avato nahoto. pathArImAMthI e jAte UbhI thaI zake tema paNa nahotI. ene hIlacaeNranI jarUra hatI, kAraNa eTaluM ja ke e koInAya para nirbhara rahevAne badale potAnI jiMdagI potAnA mijAjathI jIvavA cAhatI hatI. e pahelI vAra hIlacaeNramAM beThI, tyAre eTalI badhI khuzakhuzAla thaI gaI ke meM mArA be paga gumAvyA, tethI zuM thayuM ? A hIlaceranAM be paiDAMthI badhe harIpharI zakIza. AsapAsa naeNgeTiva vAtAvaraNa ane vicArothI gherAyelI hatI, paNa munibAne thayuM ke have enI pAse gumAvavA jevuM kazuM bacyuM ja nahotuM, tyAre phikara zenI ? duniyA samakSa e puravAra karavAnI ene taka hatI ke vikalAMga vyakti paNa potAnI moja thI ane khuzIthI dhAryuM jIvI zake che ane jiMdagI sArthaka rIte jIvyAno saMtoSa pAmI zake che. munibA jANatI hatI ke dareka vyakti potAnI bhItara eka kurukSetra khelatI hoya che. keTalAMkanuM kurukSetra hRdayamAM bhItara cAlatuM hoya che, jyAre keTalAMkanuM jIvananA saMjogo sAmenuM yuddha najaronajara joI zakAya che. munibAne e vAtano AnaMda hato ke enuM yuddha sahu koI joI zakatA hatA ane tethI caherA para smita lAvIne sadAya A yuddha laDyA karavuM, e eno makasada hato. haoNspiTalanAM be varSa yAtanAgrasta aMdhArI rAta jevAM gayAM. e samaye e braza karI zakatI nahotI. enA vALa oLI zakatI nahotI. eka vAra to ene enI jAta para evo gusso Avyo ke kAtara laIne eNe enA vALa kApI nAkhyA. cotarapha viSAda ane nirAzAnuM vAtAvaraNa hatuM. ene maLavA AvanArAMo pratye munibAne koNa jANe kema IrSyAnI lAgaNI thavA lAgI. e evuM mAnavA lAgI ke A badhAM enA khabaraaMtara pUchavAne bahAne enI hAlata joIne manamAM khuza thatAM haze. e vicAratAM haze ke A munibA cAlI zakatI nathI ane pote kevAM cAlI zake che ! AvA kaparA divasomAM munibAnI mAtA ane hiMmata ApatI hatI. e kahetI, AkAza mArI muThThImAM ... 83

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hara vakta gujara jAtA hai. acche bhI aura bUre bhI.' A samaya paNa pasAra thaI jaze ema mAnatI munibA hiMmatabhera jIvatI hatI. haoNspiTalanuM vAtAvaraNa utsAhane ogALI nAkhe tevuM ane zoka jagADe tevuM hatuM. haoNspiTalamAM sapheda pozAka paheratI narso ane karmacArIo munibAnA viSAdamAM vadhAro karatAM hatAM. cotarapha eTalI badhI naeNgeTiva bAbato hatI ke kaMTALo ane niSphaLatA sivAya ene duniyAmAM kazuM dekhAtuM nahIM. koIka to ema kahetuM, 'are ! A bicArI chokarInA kevA hAla thaze ? enA chUTAcheDA thaI gayA ja samajo. kone potAnA gharamAM vhIlacaramAM pharatI patnI rAkhavI game !' AvI paristhitimAM eka vAra DaoNkTare munibAnI mAtAne pUchyuM, 'A akasmAta thayo te pUrve munibAne koI zokha hato kharo ?' 'hA. ene citro doravAM khUba gamatAM hatAM.' DaoNkTare tatkALa munibAne kahyuM, 'to pachI tuM Aje ja tAruM peinTiMga zarU karI de.' DaoNkTaranI vAta sAMbhaLIne munibA hasI paDI. kevI vAhiyAta vAta ! hajI eno hAtha IjAgrasta hato ane hAthamAM pensila paNa pakaDI zakatI nahIM. ene je kaMI icchA thAya te doravAnuM kahyuM. sarjarInA be saptAha bAda munibAe enI mAtA pAse judA judA kalarsa maMgAvyA ane DaoNkTarane kahyuM ke e jarUra citrakAma karavAno prayatna karaze. badhAe munibAno sAtha choDI dIdho, tyAre citrakalAe ene sadAno sAtha Apyo. haoNspiTalanI pathArImAM sUtAM sUtAM e citro doravA lAgI. A citronA AkarSaka raMgoe enA jIvanamAM navo utsAha reDyo. e vhIlacaramAM besIne peinTiMga karatI pahelI kalAkAra banI ane kahetI, 'huM niHsaMdeha svIkAruM chuM ke mArA zarIrane kAraNe huM kaidamAM purAyelI chuM, paraMtu mAruM mana ane mAro AtmA AjhAda che. huM atyAre paNa moTAM sapanAM joI zakuM chuM.' potAnAM citromAM raMga pUratI vakhate e kalpanA karatI ke A raMgo mArA jIvanamAM paNa raMgo pUraze ! Ane kAraNe haoNspiTalamAM e sadA hasatI rahI ane citrakAma karatI rahI. kyAreya potAnI paristhiti sAme Akroza pragaTa karyo 84 + mATIe ghaDacAM mAnavI nahIM ke AkraMda karyuM nahIM. e sAcuM ke enI karoDarajjunI IjA ene gherI vaLI hatI, Ama chatAM hiMmatabhera jhajhUmatI rahI. munibAnA jIvanamAM eka bIjo AghAta Avyo. e jemane potAnA 'supara hIro' mAnatI hatI evA enA pitAe ene ane enI mAtAne cheha dIdho. dharatIkaMpa samo A AghAta enI pote dorelA citra sAthe munibA mAtAe saheje raDyA vinA hiMmatabhera sahana karyo, eTaluM ja nahIM paNa munibAne AliMgana ApIne kahyuM, 'tane jema jema moTI thatAM jouM chuM, tema tema mArI jiMdagI paNa vikase che.' bIjI bAju munibAe vicAryuM ke jemane huM 'supara hIro' mAnatI hatI tevA mArA pitAe mane tarachoDI, paNa tethI zuM ? have huM pote supara hIro banIza. karoDarajju tUTI gaI hatI. baMne paga pakSAghAtathI nirjIva banI gayA hatA, chatAM munibA peinTiMga zIkhavA lAgI ane phAina ArTsamAM eNe snAtakanI padavI meLavI. dhIre dhIre e pAkistAna TIvInA udghoSaka tarIke kAma karavA lAgI. vhIlacaramAM besIne enkariMga karavA lAgI ane sAthosAtha vikalAMgonA adhikAra mATe eNe avAja uThAvavAnuM zarU karyuM. enI kalAkRtiomAM mAnavIya bhAvanAo, gahana vicAro ane svapnAMo vyakta karavAnuM pasaMda karyuM. lekhikA ane preraka vaktA tarIke paNa jANItI banI ane enI vAtamAMthI sahune jiMdagI jiMdAdilIthI jIvavAno saMdeza maLavA lAgyo. vikalAMga ke nirbaLa lokone kamajorInA pratIka tarIke jovAmAM Ave che, jyAre munibAe AvA lokonI bhItaramAM rahelI tAkAtano paricaya Apyo. eNe vikalAMga bALakone samAjamAM yogya sthAna ApavA mATe prayatna zarU karyo. Ane mATe judI judI saMsthAo sAthe joDAI ane vikalAMgonI vAta karatAM AkAza mArI muThThImAM + 85

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eNe kahyuM, 'ame paNa manuSya chIe. ame paNa tamArI jema ja zvAsa laIe chIe. amane koI sahArAnI jarUra nathI. ame amArI rIte jiMdagI jIvavA mATe sakSama chIe." e vikalAMga lokone kahe ke 'hIlacera tamAruM bahAnuM banavuM na joIe. kAmacorInuM sAdhana thavuM na joIe. ApaNI kamajorIne ApaNI tAkAtamAM pheravatAM AvaDavuM joIe. jiMdagImAM potAnAM citronuM pradarzana pratyeka kSaNanI majA mANavI joIe. potAnI bhItaranI tAkAtane pragaTa karavI joIe. jo ATaluM zIkhI jaIe, to AkhuMya AkAza ApaNI muThThImAM haze.' munibA majhArI pAkistAnanI saMyukta rASTranI vhIlaceramAM jIvatI pahelI sabhAvanA dUta banI. hajI ene mATe pragatinI yAtrAno aMta nahoto. eNe mAMDaliMga zarU karyuM. e vhIlacera sAthe joDAyelI duniyAnI pahelI mAMDala munibAe uttara Apyo, 'pahelAM to huM pAkistAnanI anya strIonI mAphaka nAnI kholImAM goMdhI rAkhavAmAM AvelI eka strI hatI. mAtra patino vicAra karatI. parivArane khuza rAkhavA aharniza prayatna karatI, paraMtu kAra akasmAta pachI mAro punarjanma thayo. meM mAtra mRtyuno ja sAkSAtkAra karyo nahoto, paraMtu kArAvAsano paNa jIvaMta anubhava lIdho, allAhe mane Aje koI bIjI ja vyakti banAvI dIdhI che. huM khuza chuM ke pahelAMnI munibA mArAmAM jIvatI nathI. jiMdagImAM potAnI vikalAMgatA para kyAreya AMsu nahIM sAranArI munibA Aje roja rAtrIe raDe che. enA rudana sAthe enI zArIrika vikalAMgatAne koI saMbaMdha nathI. enA AkraMda sAthe enI vhIlacera paranI jiMdagIno koI tAluka nathI. e lokone pIDAtA jue che, tyAre ene raDavuM Ave che. nirAzAjanaka paristhitimAM sAravAra nahIM laI zakatA lokone joIne enI AMkhamAM AMsu dhasI Ave che. munibA potAnI vedanAmAMthI bacI zake che, paraMtu bIjAnI vedanA jIravI zakatI nathI. munibA majhArI eka baloca yuvatI che, je dezamAM vikalAMgatA mATe koI sabhAnatA nathI. jiMdagI zarU karI tyAre nokarInA phAMphAM hatAM ane Aje e traNa traNa ja gAe nokarI kare che. e kahe che ke tame satata kArya karatAM raho, to allAha haMmezAM tamAre mATe rasto karI Ape che. banI. 'kuziyA' nAmanA sAmayikamAM munibAnI svamukhe kahevAyelI jIvanakathA pragaTa thaI. emAM koI du:khanAM rodaNAM raDavAmAM AvyAM nahotAM. zArIrika azaktino vasavaso karavAmAM Avyo nahoto. jiMdagInI dagAbAjInI koI phariyAda karavAmAM AvI nahotI, paraMtu eNe eka vIrAMganA tarIke potAnI jIvanakathA varNavI, jenI kiMmatane koI sImA ke sarahada nahotAM. pAkistAnanI yuvatIoe munibAne prazna karyo ke, 'pahelAM je svastha ne cetanavaMtI munibA hatI, te Aje nathI. enI khoTa tamane sAlatI nathI?" 86 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI AkAza mArI muThThImAM 87

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10 INDIA harabaMsasiMgha mana ke hAre hAra, mana ke jIte jIta eka beThI daDIno, jhINI AMkhovALo, sazakta zIkha juvAna simalAnI kacerImAM beTho hato. khurazI para beTho beTho Tebala para paDelA kAmanA kAgaLomAM citta lagAvavA haradama koziza karI rahyo hato. tevIsa varSanA paMjAbanA kheDUtanA ekanA eka dIkarA harabaMsasiMghane sarakArI nokarI maLI hatI. enAM mAtApitAne to AthI parama zAMti thaI gaI hatI. harabaMsiMgha kAmamAM mana lagADavA prayatna kare che, paNa enI dilacaspI to bIje kyAMka lAgelI hatI. amRtasaranI DI.e.vI. kaoNlejanA zreSTha khelADI tarIke thayelA enA sanmAnanAM dRzyo magajamAM ghUmarI laI rahyAM hatAM. ochI UMcAI hovA chatAM apratima tAkAtane baLe haoNkI, phUTabaoNla, doDa ane taravAnI spardhAomAM nAmanA meLavI hatI. ramatanA zokhIna jIvane A sarakArI phAIlo jIvanamArgane rUMdhatI lAgatI. evAmAM ekAeka enI najara eka anokhA samAcAra para paDI. samAcAra evA hatA ke phrAMsanA pIarsa gilbarTa lobI nAmanA ramatavIre satata ekaso ne ekAvana kalAka cAlIne bhavya vizvavikrama noMdhAvyo. satata cAlavuM e to bhAre kaparI bAbata che. thoDuM cAlatAMya thAka lAge. vadhu cAlavAnuM Ave to vacce besIne thAka khAvo paDe. vaLI koI pAse pagacaMpI karAvavI paDe. ATaluM badhuM satata calAya paNa kevI rIte? simalAnI sarakArI kacerImAM beThelA A tevIsa varSanA ramatapremI juvAnane thayuM ke huM A mATe prayatna karuM to ? zA mATe pAcho paDuM ? zA mATe huM pAchaLa rahuM ? satata cAlavAnI spardhAmAM nAma kADhavA mATe yuvAna ha2baMsasiMghe tamAma prayatno zarU karyA. divase to nokarI karavAnI, paNa rAtre satata cAlavAnI tAlIma le. rAtanA bAra vAgyA sudhI to A yuvAna simalAnA ramaNIya rastAo para satata cAlato rahe. rAtanA bAra pachI koI polIsa ke cokIdAra ene cAlato aTakAve nahIM mATe e simalAnA potAnA kvArTarsamAM tAlIma le. garamInA divasomAM yuvAna harabaMsa simalAnAM jaMgalomAM satata ghUmavA lAgato. ha2bhaMsane AvI mahenata karato joIne enA mitro AvI maphatanI mAthAkUTa choDI devA samajAvavA lAgyA, phogaTanA paga duHkhADavAno ane zarIrane ATaluM kaSTa ApavAno dhaMdho karato joIne enI majAka paNa uDAvavA lAgyA. e badhA kahetA ke alyA sukhanI jiMdagI zA mATe veDaphI nAkhe che ? UMgha vecIne ujAgarA kyAM meLave che ? eka vAra 2jAnA divasomAM harabaMsa potAnA vatana paMjAbanA variyAma nagaramAM gayo. game tyAM jAya, paNa satata cAlavAnI tAlIma to aTake ja zAnI? potAnA ja gharamAM ha2baMsasiMghe tAlIma zarU karI dIdhI. potAnA ekanA eka dIkarAne AkhI rAta Ama cittA-dIpaDAnI jema AMTA mArato joIne mAtA sUe kharI ? harabaMsiMghanI mAtA paNa enI sAthe AkhI rAta jAgavA lAgI. dIkarAne kaMI thayuM to nathI ne? mAtAnI ciMtA vadhI mana ke hAre hAra, mana ke jIte jIta * 89

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gaI, harabaMsa mUMjhAyo ane vahelI take vatana choDI simalA AvIne potAnI tAlIma zarU karI dIdhI. 1961nA julAI mAsamAM harabaMsasiMghe satata vyAsI kalAka cAlavAnA manoratha sAthe simalAmAM jAheramAM prayoga zarU karyo. thoDA kalAka vItyA ane keDamAM sakhata duHkhAvo zarU thayo. simalAnA vicitra havAmAnane kAraNe enI vedanA vadhatI cAlI. Akhare chAsaTha kalAka sudhI cAlyA pachI e bhAMgI paDyo. thAkanI to eTalI badhI asara thaI ke chatrIsa kalAka sudhI bebhAna rahyo ! A niSphaLatAe evo to dhakke lagAvyo ke traNa varSa sudhI to pharI satata cAlavAno prayoga karavAnuM nAma paNa na lIdhuM. paraMtu paga vALIne bese e sAco ramatavIra nahIM. ramatano zokha ja evo ke ramatazokhInane zAMta rahevA de ja nahIM. eNe kharAkharInA khela khelI levAno manasUbo karyo. 199panA phebruArI mahinAmAM bhilAI sTezana pAse A kAryakrama hAtha dharyo. pUratI jAherAta thaI. satata eka ja vartuLamAM cAlatA rahevAthI kyAreka vartamAna paristhitinuM bhAna bhUlI jAya. vaLI thoDI vAre hozamAM Ave. paNa A vakhate enA paga to cAlatA ja hoya. AvuM to vAraMvAra thayA kare. vadhArAmAM kamaranuM kAtila darda ane masalsamAM satata dukhAvo rahe. A vakhate harabaMsa pAcho paDe tema na hato. mana makkama hatuM. AphatonI paravA na hatI. jItano pAko niradhAra hato. pachI aTakavAnI ke hArI khAvAnI vAta kevI ? Akhare harabaMsasithe satata vyAsI kalAka cAlIne siddhi meLavI. ATalI siddhi meLavI e zAMta beTho nahIM. enI sAme to pIarsa gilbarTa lobInA satata ekaso ne ekAvana kalAke cAlavAnA vikramanA samAcAra taravaratA hatA ! amRtasaramAM pharI prayoga hAtha dharyo. satata ekaso ne pAMca kalAka cAlyo. 1996nA phebruArImAM eNe vizvavikrama toDavAnA manoratha sAthe medAne jaMgamAM jhukAvyuM. tAtAnagaramAM ekaso ne trepana kalAka cAlavAno irAdo rAkhyo. rAtadivasa e cAlato ja rahyo. ekaso kalAka, ekaso ne pacIsa kalAka ane cheka ekaso ne pistALIsa kalAka cAlyo. ethIya AgaLa cAlato rahyo. che ke ekaso ne ogaNapacAsa 90 mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI kalAka sudhI pahoMcyo. paNa khAdhApIdhA vinA kamajorI AvI gaI hatI. e potAnI sthitinuM bhAna gumAvI beTho. cAlato cAlato aTakI gayo. mAtra be kalAka mATe vizvavikrama cUkI gayo. cAra kalAka mATe niradhAra saphaLa thato rahI gayo. vadhArAmAM tAtA kaMpanI taraphathI bheTa rUpe maLanArI moTarakAra paNa gumAvI. niSphaLatAe harabaMsano keDo mUkyo na hato. harabaMsa enI sAme harabaMsasiMgha hatAza thAya tema na hato. 1966nA julAI mAsamAM nepALanI rAjadhAnI kAThamaMDumAM prayoga rAkhyo. nepALanA rAjA mahendra AmAM khAsa hAjarI ApI. cAlavAnuM zarU karatAM pahelAM covIsa kalAka agAuthI harabaMsasiMgha bhojana baMdha kare. prayoganA samaye cAlatAM cAlatAM ja mAtra pANI, cA, kaoNphI, phaLano rasa ane viTAminanI goLIo le. phaLanA rasa para ja harabaMsanI tAkAtano saghaLo AdhAra, nepALamAM to kyAMya phaLa maLe nahIM. AthI harabaMsanA zarIramAM ghaNI kamajorI AvI gaI. evAmAM varasAda tUTI paDyo . ahIM e mAtra ekaso ne soLa kalAka cAlIne ja bhAMgI paDyo. eka vadhu kamanasIbI laIne e pAcho pharyo, paNa dilamAM kamajorI UgI nahIM. 'eka divasa, eka divasa ...' e japavA lAgyo. e divase saphaLatA mArA kadama cUmatI haze. 1968nA jAnyuArI mahinAmAM haidrAbAdamAM vizvavikrama toDavAnA niradhAra sAthe cAlavAnuM zarU karyuM. manamAM gAMTha vALI hatI ke game te thAya, paNa A vakhate kyAMya aTakavuM nathI. pIDA thavA lAgI. bhAna bhUlavA lAgyo paNa aTakavAnI vAta kevI ? Akhare ekaso ne bAvana kalAka sudhI satata cAlIne mana ke hAre hAra, mana ke jIte jIta * 91

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bhUkhyA janono jaTharAgni ThAranAra vizvavikrama sthApyo. A pachI tarata ja tAkAta meLavIne mahArASTranA nAMdeDa zaheramAM ekaso ne trepana kalAka cAlavAno vikrama racyo. niSphaLatA have harabaMsanA mArgamAMthI haTI gaI hatI, to saphaLatA kepha caDAvI zake tema na hatI. harabaMsasiMgha satata pragati karato rahyo. nAgapuramAM 125 kalAka, muMbaImAM 155 kalAka, iMdoramAM 156 kalAka ane amadAvAdamAM 157 kalAka sudhI satata cAlIne potAno vizvavikrama vadhArato ja rahyo. 1969mAM amadAvAdamAM eka paLavAra paNa thobhyA vinA satata cha rAta ane sAta divasa sudhI cAlato rahyo. AnI gaNatarI karIe to traNaso ne cauda mAIla jeTaluM aMtara thAya ! satata cAlanArA mAnavIne divasa karatAM rAta vadhu parezAna kare che. rAtre masalsanI pIDA vadhI jAya che. ethIya vadhu UMdha haTAvavAnI koI davA na letA A mAnavIne UMgha khUba kanaDe che. 1938nI bIjI julAIe janmelA A ramatavIre nikhAlasapaNe svIkAra karyo ke dasa kalAka cAlyA pachI sakhata thAka lAge che. bAkInA jaththAbaMdha kalAko mAtra manobaLathI ja cAlI zakAya che. mana tUTyuM to saghaLuM tUTayuM. mahAna ramatavIra harabaMsasiMghanuM manobaLa kevuM haze ! A mAnavI cAlatAM cAlatAM ja kapaDAM badalavAnI, snAna karavAnI, bUTa paheravAnI ke utAravAnI ane zaucanI kSiA karI zake che. namra ane zaramALa ramatavIra harabaMsasiMdha ATalI saphaLatA hAMsala karIne thobhavA mAgato nahoto. A pachI to beMgAlurumAM satata ekaso bAsaTha kalAka ane paMdara miniTa sudhI cAlIne e samayano navo vikrama noMdhAvyo. manobaLathI kevI siddhi meLavI zakAya, enuM harabaMsasiMgha udAharaNa banI rahyo. sAdhAraNa mAnavInuM sAcuM dila ene asAdhAraNa banAve che ! duniyAmAM evA aneka dIpako prakAzita haze ke je potAnA nAnakaDA khaMDamAM eka dIvo peTAvIne copAsa ajavALuM phelAvatA haze ! e sUrya ke caMdranI jema virATa sRSTine prakAzita ke prabhAvita karatA nahIM hoya, paraMtu potAnI copAsanI nAnakaDI duniyAne mAnavIya bhAvanAo ane udAra kAryothI ujamALa karatA hoya dezanI hAlAkI, behAlI ke bhUkhamarAthI bacavA mATe koI paNa bhoge videzamAM pahoMcanArA gerakAnUnI imigranTsanI dazA atyaMta kaphoDI hoya che. e mAnavI amerikAmAM hoya ke dubAImAM hoya, paNa ene mAthe satata kAyadAno khopha cakarAvA leto hoya che. ene oche pagAre kALI majUrI karavI jyorja munojha 92 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI

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paDe che, dabAtA-caMpAtA jIvavuM paDe che. divasane aMte mAMDa bhojana karI zake eTaluM vetana maLatuM hoya che. AvA lAcAra lokonI majabUrIno lAbha uThAvIne emane ochuM vetana ApavAmAM Ave ane e nirAdhAra loko eno muMge moMe svIkAra karIne jIvana pasAra karatA hoya che. | ziyALAnI kaDakaDatI hADa thijAvI nAkhe evI himavarSA hoya ke pachI unALAnI bALI nAkhe evI garamI hoya, paraMtu A loko tanatoDa majUrI karIne jIvatA rahevA mATe ane dezamAM vasatA potAnAM kuTuMbIjanone Teko ApavA mATe kaparo ane muzkelIbharyo jaMga khelatA hoya che. emAMya jo emanA para bekArInI talavAra vIMjhAya, to to emane potAne mATe paNa khAvAnA sAMsA paDatA hoya che. bekArImAM gharavihoNA banIne koI jAhera jagAe Azaro laIne jidagInA kaparA zvAsa levA ke kheMcavA paDe che ! duHkha ane garIbInI kakaLatI vedanA to jeNe duHkha ane garIbI bhogavyAM hoya, te ja jANe. phUlanI suMvALI seja para poDhanArAone kAMTAnI pathArI para sUnArAno khyAla na hoya. AthI gerakAyadesara rIte AvI gayelA imigranTsano kharo khyAla to je imigranTes hoya, tene ja Ave ! kolaMbiyAmAM madhyama varganA kuTuMbamAM janmelA jyorja manojhane jIvanajarUrI cIja vastuo maLI rahetI hatI, paraMtu e samaye paNa enA manamAM udAra bhAvanA evI ke potAnI be breDamAMthI eka braDa koI bhUkhyA garIbane ApI deto. koI jarUriyAtamaMdanI jarUrane pUrI pADavA mATe e potAnI cIjavastuo ApatAM saheje acakAto nahIM. jyorja munojha aDhAra varSano thayo, tyAre enA pitAne kaoNphI phaeNkTarInI bahAra akasmAta thayo ane mRtyu pAmyA. dhIme dhIme gharamAM garIbI pravezavA lAgI. muzkelIo vadhavA lAgI ane AthI enI mAtAe potAnAM bALakone laIne sonerI duniyAmAM javAnuM nakkI karyuM. A sonerI duniyA eTale amerikAnuM nyUyaoNrka zahera ! mananI icchA eka hatI ane vAstavikatA taddana viparIta hatI. amerikAmAM kAyadesarano praveza meLavIne nokarI karavAnI koI zakyatA nahotI, AthI gerakAnUnI imigranTas tarIke jyorja manojhanI mAtA Dorisa potAnAM putra ane putrIne laIne nokarInI khoja mAM jagatanA sonerI zahera nyUyorkamAM keTalAMya sapanAM sAthe AvI. 94 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI garama bhojana vaheMcato jayorja munojha e divaso bhAre muzkelInA hatA. ochA vetanathI calAvavuM paDatuM, paNa Dorisane eTalI AzAyeza hatI ke ene ane enAM saMtAnone bhUkhe taraphaDavuM to paDatuM nathI ne ! mAlikanA manasvIpaNAno svIkAra karIne kALI majUrI karavI paDatI hatI. eka bAju bekArIno bhaya hato, to bIjI bAju kAyadAnI cuMgAlamAM phasAI javAnI bhIti hatI. paraMtu Dorise hiMmata hAryA vagara nokarI zodhavA mAMDI ane 1987mAM Dorisa ane enAM saMtAno amerikAnAM kAyadesaranAM nAgariko banyAM. Dorisano putra jyorja munAjha have skUla basanA DrAivara tarIke salAmata nokarI meLavI zakyo. jyorja vahelI savAre potAnA kAma para nIkaLI jato ane sAMje ghera pAcho Avato. nizALanAM bALakone emanA gherathI lAvavAnuM ane pAchAM mUkavAnuM e kAma karato. bAkIno samaya e mitro sAthe gapATA lagAvavAmAM vitAvato hato. I. sa. 2004mAM eka vAra relavenA pATA najIka potAnA mitro sAthe vAta karato hato, tyAre sahue amerikAmAM gerakAyadesara vasatA imigranTanI durdazAnuM varNana karyuM. e ghaTanAonI vedanA jyorja manojhane sparzI gaI. ene potAnI vIsa varSa pUrvenI jiMdagInAM smaraNo yAda AvI gayAM. eNe manomana nakkI karyuM ke eka samaye huM jevo besahArA hato, evA besahArA lokone mATe mAre kaMIka karI chUTavuM joIe. keTalAya loko rAtre bhUkhyA sUtA hoya, e vAstavika dRzyo enI AMkhamAM doDavA lAgyAM. eNe vicAryuM ke Ano koI upAya to karavo joIe. bhUkhyAMjanono jaTharAgni ThAranAra * 95

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doDhaso vyaktionuM bhojana banAvato jyorja eka vAra jyorja rAtanA samaye basa calAvato potAne ghera pAcho pharato hato. A samaye eNe joyuM ke eka khAdyapadArtha banAvanArI phaeNkTarIno mAlika e phekTarImAMthI vadhArAnA khAdyapadArtho pheMkI deto hato. lokone vAsI khAvA Ape to tene mAthe sajAnuM jokhama rahetuM. jyorja phekTarInA mAlika pAse gayo. emane vinaMtI karI ke A rIte rAtre khAdyapadArtho pheMkI do cho, ene badale mane Apo ne ! huM bhUkhyA lokonI AMtaraDI ThAravAmAM eno upayoga karIza. phaeNkTarInA mAlikone Ama karavAmAM koI takalIpha nahotI. jyorje bAra kalAka nokarI karyA pachI sAMje pAchA pharatAM potAnI skUlabasamAM khAdyapadArtho lAvavAnuM zarU karyuM. have eNe vicAra karyo ke AnI jALavaNI mATe zuM karavuM ? eTale A parivAre eka moTuM phrijhara kharIdhuM. ene gharanA dIvAnakhaMDamAM mUkyuM ane emAM dararoja rAtre sAthe maLIne badhA garamAgarama bhojana banAvavA lAgyA. 2008mAM amerikAnA arthataMtra para moTo AghAta thayo. ghaNA lokoe ekAeka nokarI-dhaMdhA gumAvyA. keTalAkane ghara choDIne taMbUmAM rahevAno vAro Avyo. AvI vyaktio jyorja ane enAM kuTuMbIjano pAse bhojana meLavavA mATe AvavA lAgI. e badhA jyorja manojha pAse doDIne AvatA ane te emane garamAgarama bhojana sAthe sarasa majAnI kaoNphI Apato. sauthI vizeSa vAta to e che ke A bhukhyAjanonAM manamAM eka zraddhA satata vasatI hatI ke game tevI kaDakaDatI ThaMDI haze ke pachI muzaLadhAra varasAda haze, topaNa jyorja enI skUla basa laIne AvavAno ja ane emane hasatA cahere bhojana sAthe uSmAbharyA hAthe garamAgarama kaoNphIno eka kapa ApavAno.. bALapaNamAM potAnI be beDamAMthI eka breDa bIjAne khavaDAvanArA jyorja munojhane thayuM ke have Arthika jarUriyAto pUrI thaI che, to pachI pagAramAM maLatA thoDA DaoNlaramAMthI vadhu bhojana banAvuM to ! jyorja munAjhane pagAra peTe dara aThavADiye je rakama maLatI hatI, emAMthI sAtaso DaoNlaranI 2kama bhojana mATe kharcavA lAgyo. chellAM pAMca varSathI eNe potAnI A kamANImAMthI paNa bhojanasevA ApavA mAMDI. dhIre dhIre eNe judI judI sAta jagAe bhojanasevAno vistAra karyo. bhAratanA jevI sadAvratanI pravRtti muno amerikAmAM karavA mAMDI. 96 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI keTalIya rAtonI rAto eNe A annadAnanI pravRtti calAvI. enA annadAnane pariNAme 2004 thI 2008 sudhImAM besahArA evA lAkheka mANasoe bhojana meLavyuM haze. roja rAtre sADA nava vAgyAnA sumAre bhUkhyA loko rAha joIne beThA hoya. AmAM cInAo hoya, ithopiyano hoya, ijiziyano ane dakSiNa eziyAnA loko hoya, zveta ane azvata amerikano ane briTananA loko paNa hoya. jyorja manojhano eka ja maMtra ke, "je koI vyakti bhUkhI haze, ene huM madada karIza." jyorja manojhanI zveta raMganI pika-apa Traka rAhata-sAmagrI laIne Ave. emAM garama khorAka, kaoNphI ane garama caoNkaleTa hoya, jyorjanI rAha jotA loko A bhojana meLavavA mATe pika-apa Traka tarapha dhasI Ave. jyorja e sahune premathI bhojana pIrase. emanI AMkhomAMthI maLatI kRtajJatAnI lAgaNI jyorjamAM navo utsAha jagADe. keTalAkane mATe to A be divasa bAda maLeluM garama bhojana hoya, to keTalAka gaIkAlathI bhUkhyA hoya ane temane maLeluM prathama bhojana hoya. mAMDa mAMDa cAlI zake evAM ati vRddha-vRddhAo hoya ke jemane mATe garama bhojana e svapnavat hoya. bhUkhyAMjanono jaTharAgni ThAranAra * 97

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AvI rIte niyamita bhojana lenAra eDuraDo nAmanI vyakti e potAnI lAgaNI vyakta karatAM kahe ' che, 'huM parama kRpALu paramezvarano AbhArI chuM ke jemaNe A mANasanA hRdayane sparza karyo. kyAreka khorAka meLavavAnI muzkelI hoya, topaNa A basaDrAivara nirAza thato nathI. enuM premajanita zramakArya satata cAlatuM rahe che ane prAraMbhe roja ATha vyaktine vinAmUlya bhojana ApavAnuM enuM kAma doDhaso vyakti amerikAnA pramukha barAka sudhI pahoMcI gayuM che. obAmA sAthe potAnI nokarI sivAyano moTA bhAgano samaya jyorja munojha ane enuM kuTuMba AmAM vitAve che. parivAranA sahu koI ene hAtha ane sAtha Ape che. enA dIvAnakhaMDanI ghaNI moTI jagA moTA kadanA phrijhare rokI che ane enA gharanuM porca bhojananA DabbAo ane kAgaLanI DizothI khIcokhIca hoya che. enA phleTano nAnA kadano oraDo koThAra banI gayo che. vaLI, kyAMka cokhkhAM kapaDAM ane blekaTanI thelIo jarUriyAtamaMda lokone ApavA mATe taiyAra paDI hoya che. puSkaLa khorAka rAMdhavAne kAraNe enA gharano sTava paNa vAraMvAra bagaDI jato hoya che, AthI ghaNA mANasonI ekasAthe rasoI banAvavA mATenAM vAsaNomAM khAdyapadArtha rAMdhavA mATe enI bahenanA epArTamenTano paNa upayoga kare che. satata khorAka banAvavAne kAraNe jyorjane kamarano duHkhAvo rahyA kare che, paraMtu enI kazI phariyAda karyA vinA A mAnavI enA kArya ane kramamAM aTala rahe che. vahelI savAre pAMca vAge UThIne nityakrama patAvIne e zALAnAM bALakone levA mATe nIkaLI paDe che. vaccenI risesa vakhate ghera eka AMTo lagAvIne rasoInI tapAsa kare che. sAMje sADA pAMca vAgye ghera pAcho phare che. kyAreka rastAmAM Donezana levA rokAI jAya che ane e pachI ghera AvyA bAda kvinsa sTrITamAM jatAM pahelAM e khorAkanA DabbAo paeNka karavA lAgI jAya che. zanivAre nAstAnuM menu hoya che, to ravivAre zALAnI rajAnA divase e potAnA priyajanone mATe mIThAI banAve che. thAkyA vinA manojha ane enI bahena A kAmamAM DUbelA rahe che. kudaratI Aphata hoya ke sAmAjika muzkelI hoya, paNa kyAreya bhUkhyAone bhojana ApavAnA emanA kAmamAM avarodha Avato nathI. e kahe che ke, 'huM na jAuM to huM becenI anubhavuM chuM, kAraNa ke huM jANuM chuM ke teo mArI rAha joI rahyA haze." amerikAmAM AvelI Arthika kaTokaTIne kAraNe enA A kAryamAM dAnano pravAha thoDo dhImo paDyo, paraMtu jyorja manojhanuM kAma to e ja rIte vaNathaMbhya cAlyA kare che, paraduHkhabhaMjana manojhanI Trakane jotAM ja Aje ToLAbaMdha loko hArabaMdha UbhA rahI jAya che. emanA udvegabharyA udAsIna caherA upara teja camakI UThe che. Ane mATe Izvara ane potAnI mAtAne preraNAstrota mAne che. e kahe che ke "mArI mAtA pAsethI TukaDAmAMthI TukaDo vaheMcavAnuM zIkhyo chuM ane e ja huM atyAre karI rahyo chuM ." bhojana pIrasatI vakhate enI vANImAM bhArobhAra anukaMpA hoya che ane enI najaramAM parama AnaMda hoya che. sArA nAmanI eka Telivijhana riporTare jyorja manojhanI mulAkAta lIdhA pachI kahyuM, 'huM jyorja manojhanI vAtathI eTalI badhI bhAvuka banI gaI ke huM mArI AMkhanAM AMsu rokI zakI nahIM. eka sAcA devadUta sAme eka ja khaMDamAM besI teno inTaravyu letAM mArAM romeroma romAMca anubhavatAM hatAM. eno vIDiyo eDiTa karatAM paNa huM raDI rahI hatI.' sArAnI A saMvedanAnuM kAraNa e ke eka vakhata gerakAyadesara imigranTas tarIke AvelI e bekAra hatI ane ene paNa bhojana meLavavAnAM phAMphAM paDyAM hatAM ! 98 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI bhUkhyAMjanono jaTharAgni ThAranAra * 99.

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paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga ! dakSiNa amerikAnA bhUmikhaMDamAM cheka dakSiNa cheDe AvelA pesiphika mahAsAgarathI gherAyelA cilI dezamAM sauthI jUnI ane pratiSThita yunivarsiTIomAM pI.yu.sI nI bolabAlA che. pI.yu.sI.nuM AkhuM nAma che ponTIphIsIA yunivarsiDADe keTolikA DI. cilI'. A yunivarsiTImAM meDikala vidyAzAkhAmAM DeniyelA grAsiyAe praveza meLavyo. eka to A yunivarsiTImAM cilInI meDikala skUlomAM sauthI vadhu kaparI pravezaparIkSA levAtI hatI. emAM saphaLa thaIne DeniyelAe praveza meLavyo, tyAre enA AnaMdano pAra nA rahyo. enA AnaMdanuM bIjuM kAraNa e hatuM ke DeniyelA grAsiyAnA pitA krisTiana grAsiyA pI.yu.sI.nI meDikala vidyAzAkhAmAM prAdhyApaka hatA ane DeniyalAnI mAtA liyonara pAlomora jANItI daMtacikitsaka hatI. potAnAM traNa saMtAno utsAhabharyo, taMdurastIyukta ane buddhizALI bane, te mATe eNe DenTisTanI kAmagIrI paNa thoDo samaya choDI dIdhI. AvA vidyAvyAsaMgI, tejasvI kauTuMbika vAtAvaraNamAM UcharelI DeniyalAne bAyolaoNjImAM UMDo rasa hato ane emAM e ujjavaLa kArakirdI dharAvatI. eNe vikhyAta meDikala skUlamAM praveza meLavyo. cilImAM meDikala DigrI meLavavA mATe sAta varSa abhyAsa karavAno hoya ane ane e pachI bIjAM traNa varSa khAsa tAlIma levI paDe. Ama dasa varSanI lAMbI abhyAsayAtrAno DeniyelAe umaMgabhera prAraMbha karyo. - 2002nA oNkTobaranA AkharI saptAhamAM DeniyelA cothA varSanA abhyAsane aMte AvI cUkI hatI. cilInI tamAma maMDikala skUlonA vidyArthIo vacce AMtaraskUla khela-kUda spardhA yojAtI hatI. emAM dara varSe yojAtI A spardhAmAM je meDikala skUla sauthI vadhu TrAMphI meLavatI, eno mAna-marabato vadhI jato. enA nAmane cAra cAMda lAgI jatA. vijetA TImanA khelADIonA medAna para ane meDikala skUlamAM tAlIonA gaDagaDATa vacce sanmAno yojAtAM. cAra divasa cAlatI A spardhAmAM paMdaraso jeTalA vidyArthIo bhAga letAM ane emAM vaoNlibola, bAskeTabola, Tenisa, phUTabaoNla ane svimiMga spardhAo yojAtI. 200ranI e spardhA be lAkha ane sAITha hajAranI vastI dharAvatA cilInA teniko zaheramAM yojAvAnI hatI. cilInI rAjadhAnI sAttiogo zaherathI chasso ne sittera kilomITara dakSiNe AveluM e zahera hatuM. A spardhAmAM bhAga levo ke nahIM te vize DeniyalAnA manamAM ghaNI dvidhA hatI. eka to sAme DarmeTolaoNjI (tvacArogavijJAna)nI parIkSA AvI rahI hatI. emAM vaLI enI priya sakhI A spardhAmAM bhAga nahIM levAnuM nakkI karI cUkI hatI. sAttiAgothI tenikonI dakSiNa dizAnI saphara paNa ghaNI moMghI hatI. rAtanI TrenamAM naveka kalAka lAgI jatA, Ama to DeniyelA deDha ane sAhasika svabhAvanI hatI. bAika calAvavAnI ane khelakudanI zokhIna hatI. potAnuM dhAryuM karavAmAM mAnanArI hatI, paraMtu koNa jANe kema, paNa A spardhAmAM bhAga levA javuM ke nahIM, e vize enA manamAM moTI mathAmaNa cAlatI hatI. DeniyelA grAsiyA paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga * 101

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eka tarapha ema thatuM hatuM ke mitrono ati Agraha che ke DeniyelAe teniko zaheranI A spardhA mATe AvavuM joIe. AnuM kAraNa e ke DeniyelAnI TImane enI phUTabaoNlanA khelanI kAbeliyatanI jarUra hatI. mitrone mATe ane skUlane khAtara eNe javuM joIe. vaLI DeniyelA e paNa jANatI hatI ke ramatagamatathI e potAnA abhyAsanA dabANane haLavuM karI zakaze ane medAnamAM khelavAne kAraNe enuM mana bhaNataranA bhAra vinA mokaLAza anubhavaze. mananI saghaLI dvidhAo choDIne aMte eNe mitronA Agrahane vaza thaIne musApharI kheDavAnuM nakkI karyuM. budhavAranI e rAtrIe jyAre sAttiogonA senTrala Trena sTezana para AvI, tyAre manamAM vaLI musApharI mokUpha rAkhIne pAchA pharavAno vicAra jAgyo. hajAro vidyArthIonI bhIDane kAraNe tenikone mATe cilInI rASTrIya relavee spezyala Treno doDAvavAnuM nakkI karyuM hatuM, paraMtu A spezyala Trena jUnA bhaMgAra DabbAone joDIne banAvI hatI. A DabbAnI bArIo gaMdI ane melavALI hatI. TrenanA DabbAnI bahArano ane aMdarano raMga UkhaDelo hato. enA jUnA purANA kocamAM kyAMka lAiTanA vAyaro labaDI paDyA hatA, to kyAMka globa hovA chatAM lAiTa thatI nahotI, kyAMka sAva aMdhAruM hatuM. A joIne DeniyalAne bhAre akaLAmaNa thaI. aMte manamAM vicAryuM ke je che te A che. vaLI enI pAse bIjo koI vikalpa nathI. TrenanI musApharI salAmata to kharI. Trena cAlu thaI. keTalAka vidyArthIoe giTAra kADhI ane TrenanA DabbAmAM gAvA-bajAvavA lAgyA. DeniyalAne enA mitroe DAnsamAM joDAI javAnuM kahyuM. sAmAnya saMjogomAM DeniyelA jarUra taiyAra thaI gaI hota. ene DAnsa karavo khuba pasaMda hato, paraMtu koNa jANe kema, Aje enA mana para udAsInatA chavAyelI hatI. e udAsInatAne kAraNe enAmAM koI utsAha jovA maLato nahoto. AthI dostonI mAphI mAgIne DabbAnI bArI pAse beThI. aMdhArI rAtamAM bahAra najare paDatAM prakAzamaya gAmaDAMo jotI rahI. rAta vadhu gherI banatI gaI. A pravAsane eka kalAka vItyo haze. DabbAmAM dostonI dhIMgAmastI cAlatI hatI. sahu AnaMdI ane tophAnI mUDamAM hatA. rAtanA dasa vAgyAno 102 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI samaya thayo. DeniyalAnA mitroe vicAryuM ke cAlone, bAjunA DabbAmAM jaIe. e DabbAmAM paNa ApaNA meDikala skUlanA sAthI-dosto hoya to, e badhAne maLIe ane AnaMda-moja karIe. be DabbAne joDato rasto (vAMka-ve) pAra karIne sAme javAnuM hatuM. Treina 2kAgovA nAmanA cilInA audyogika zahera pAsethI pasAra thaI rahI hatI. DeniyelAnI AgaLa enA sahAdhyAyI hatA. be DabbAne joDatA rastA vaccenI lAiTa sAva jhAMkhI hatI ane bhAgye ja kazuM dekhAtuM hatuM. vaLI be DabbAne joDatAM kapaliMgsanA aMkoDA barAbara phiTa nahotA. AthI bAjunA kocamAM javA mATenA A vaoNka-venA AraMbhe moTo 'gepa' hato. AgaLa rahelo khAssI UMcAI dharAvato eno mitra Digo lAMbA paga dharAvato hato ane tethI e saheja kUdIne sAme pahoMcI gayo. aMdhArAmAM komaLa DeniyelA enI pAchaLa AvatI hatI. e samaye Trena eka vaLAMka parathI pasAra thatI hatI. ene kAraNe DabbAnI zarUAtano 'gaMpa" jarA vadhu moTo thaI gayo. UMcA DigonI mAphaka komaLa DeniyelA kyAMthI lAMbo kUdako lagAvI zake ? aMdhArAmAM eNe kUdako lagAvavA prayAsa karyo. be bogI vacce yogya joDANa nahIM thavAthI DeniyelAe jevo vokave para paga mukyo ke tarata ja e nIce sarakI gaI. eka kSaNa pahelAM DeniyelA hatI, to bIjI kSaNe jANe adRzya thaI gaI. DabbAnA cheDe Ubho rahIne dhUmrapAna karato eka musAphara bolI UThyo, oha, pelI chokarI paDI gaI.' aMdhArI rAta, dhasamasatI Trena, vaLAMka leto TUMka ! paDI gayelI DeniyelAne ema lAgyuM ke e kyAMka Amatema phaMgoLAI rahI che ! jANe citravicitra DarAmaNAM svapnAMo vaccethI saphALI jAge, e rIte eNe ghanaghora aMdhArI rAtre be pATA vacce potAne paDelI joI. AzcaryanI vAta e hatI ke ene koI pIDA thatI nahotI. paraMtu enA vALa ane enA caherA para koIe cIkaNuM pravAhI copaDyuM hoya tevuM lAgyuM. enI DAbI AMkha pAsethI lohI vahetuM hatuM. enI AMkhonI AgaLa vALanA gUMcaLA vIMTaLAIne paDyAM hatAM. ene dUra karavA mATe DeniyelAe prayAsa karyo, paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga + 103

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paNa kazuM vaLyuM nahIM. zuM thayuM che, e jANavA pharI cahero UMcakavA mATe eNe DAbo hAtha UMco karyo, paNa ene khyAla Avyo ke eno DAbo hAtha to che ja nahIM. kyAMka UDI gayo che ! e asamaMjasamAM paDI gaI. relavenA be pATA vacce lohIluhANa sthitimAM eNe enuM mAthuM UMcuM karavA punaH prayatna karyo. vALathI gherAyelI AMkhonI vaccethI potAnI hAlata jANavA mahenata karI ane je joyuM tenAthI zarIramAMthI bhayanI kaMpArI pasAra thaI gaI. eno zvAsa thaMbhI gayo. Darane kAraNe enI AMkho phATI gaI. je hAtha UMco karavA e prayAsa karatI hatI, e hAtha ja nahoto. eNe joyuM to eno DAbo hAtha sAva kapAI gayo hato. bIjI bAju najara karI. jamaNA hAthane UMcakavA prayAsa karyo, to eno bhaya ghaNo atyaMta vadhI gayo. eno jamaNo hAtha paNa koNIethI kapAI gayo hato. enA baMne hAthanA kapAyelA bhAgomAMthI lohInI dhArA vahetI hatI. eNe saheja UbhA thavAno prayatna karyo, to saheje khasI zakI nahIM. enA zarIramAM jANe vedanAno jvALAmukhI phATI nIkaLyo hoya ema lAgyuM. DeniyelAnI AMkhe aMdhArAM AvavA lAgyAM. be hAtha to gayAM, kiMtu paganuM zuM ? eno DAbo paga enA thApAmAMthI ane eno jamaNo paga ghUMTaNamAMthI kapAI cUkyo hato. be hAtha ane be paga vinAnI DeniyelA nirAdhAra avasthAmAM aMdhArI rAtre pATAnI vacce paDI hatI. enA zarIramAMthI puSkaLa lohI vahI gayuM hatuM. enA jIvananI A sauthI hRdayavidAraka kaTokarIbharI kSaNo hatI. meDikalanI vidyArthI tarIke e jANatI hatI ke A samaye puSkaLa lohI vahe che ane e paNa jANatI hatI ke A samaye mahAta ke nAsIpAsa thavuM ke gabharAI javuM eTale mRtyune nimaMtraNa ApavA jevuM che. be hAtha nathI, be paga nathI, paNa DeniyelAmAM hiMmata hatI. eNe joyuM ke enI hAlata evI che ke e hAthanA TekAthI ke pagathI UbhI thaI zake tema nathI. bhalabhalA mAnavIne bhAMgI nAkhe evI A bhayAvaha kSaNamAM eka vadhu umero e thayo ke jo e pote Ama pATAnI vacce ja paDI raheze, to thoDA samaya pachI AvanArI bIjI Trena heThaLa cagadAI jaze. gADI atyaMta vaLAMka letI hatI e sthAna para DeniyelA paDI hatI. eno to khataro vadhAre. jIvasaTosaTanI A ghaDI hatI. kyAMya AzAnuM koI kiraNa dekhAtuM nahotuM. hAtha ane paga kapAyA hoya tyAre UbhA kaI rIte thavuM ? paNa bIjI bAju jo A relavenA pATA parathI UbhI thAya nahIM, to ene mATe mota nizcita hatuM. ene tAtkAlika sAravAranI jarUra hatI. pATAnI eka bAjue jhAMkharAnI vADa hatI, to bIjI bAjue AvelAM khetaromAM kheDUtonAM nAnAM makAna hatAM. DeniyelAe joyuM to enI najara hAive paranA eka peTrola-paMpanI battIo para paDI. ene thayuM ke e ghasaDAIne gabaDatI-gabaDatI A prakAza sudhI pahoMce, to kadAca koInI najara enA para paDe. eNe mAMDa mAMDa potAnI pITha sTeja UMcI karI ane relavenA be pATA vacce lohIthI nIMgaLatA potAnA dehane gabaDAvavAnI koziza karI. koI paNa bhoge A be pATA vaccethI to bahAra nIkaLavuM jarUrI hatuM. jo e pATA para paDI rahe to jiMdagInI sapharano aMta nizcita hato. zarIramAM hatuM eTaluM baLa ekaThuM karIne e pATA vaccethI eka bAju gabaDI. eka bAju dakSiNa dizAethI AvatI TrenanA pATA hatA, to bIjI bAju uttaramAMthI dakSiNamAM jatI TrenanA pATA hatA. aMdhArI rAte e gabaDIne be pATAnI vacce AvelI jagAmAM to pahoMcI, paraMtu e pachI enA zarIramAM koI jora rahyuM nahIM. vadhu gabaDI zake tevI enI sthiti nahotI. AthI eNe cIso pADavAnuM nakkI karyuM. kadAca koI enI cIsa sAMbhaLe ane madada mATe doDI Ave ! mota gherI vaLyuM hatuM, chatAM jiMdagIno jaMga choDavo nahoto. aMdhArI rAtre AzAnuM koI kiraNa dekhAtuM nahotuM, chatAM nirAza thavuM nahotuM. savAla to hato ke AvI aMdhArI rAtre zaherathI ATale dUra, AvI vaLAMkavALI nirjana jagAe te vaLI koNa AvavAnuM ? paNa DeniyelA ema dama toDavA cAhatI nahotI. ema hArI javA mAgatI nahotI. e jorajorathI bUmo pADavA lAgI, 'bacAvo, are ! koI mane bacAvo, bacAvo'. banyuM evuM ke A aMdhArI uSNa rAtrIe rikArDo morAlisa nAmano 104 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga + 105

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dADiyo khetamajUra TahelavA nIkaLyo hato. Ameya roja pATA para TahelavuM e enI Adata hatI, kAraNa ke enI patnIe ene gharamAM sigAreTa pIvAnI manAI pharamAvI hatI. sigAreTa pIvAnI lata jAge eTale e laTAra mAravA nIkaLI paDe. vidyArthIothI bharelI speziyala Trena pasAra thaI, tyAre e A pATAnI bAjue Tahelato ja hato. TrenanA DabbAmAMthI kUdakAbhera gIto gAtA-nAcatA vidyArthIono avAja eNe sAMbhaLyo. hajI e gItono avAja enA kAnamAM pUro guMje, tyAM to thoDI ja miniTamAM eNe 'bacAvo bacAvo'no avAja sAMbhaLyo ane e tarapha doDI gayo. eNe lohI nIMgaLatI hAlatamAM relavenA be Treka vacce baMne hAtha ane baMne paga vinAnI jhajhUmatI DeniyelAne joI. enA zarIramAMthI kaMpArI pasAra thaI gaI. ene jotAM ja rikArDo morAlise kahyuM, 'huM madada maMgAvuM chuM. tuM saheje AghIpAchI thatI nahIM.' A avAje DeniyelAnA manamAM AzAnuM jhAMkhuM kiraNa jagAvyuM. rikArDo morAlisa aMdhArI rAtre peTrola paMpa tarapha phona karavA mATe doDyo. ene AvI rIte madada mAgavA mATe doDato joIne bhayAnaka zArIrika hAlata dharAvatI DeniyelAe potAnI jAtane kahyuM, 'mAre AzA gumAvavI joIe nahIM.' rikArDo morAlise phona karatAM cAra mANasothI susajja evI eNmbulansa kAra ravAnA thaI, joke eNmbulansa kAramAM rahelA perAmeDika vikTara solisane A vigata sAMbhaLatAM lAgyuM ke AvI kapAyelAM aMgovALI vyakti bace tevo koI saMbhava nathI ! cAra miniTamAM to eNmbulansa e jagAnI najIka AvI pahoMcI ane emaNe rikArDo morAlisane hAIvenA peTrola paMpa ane relavenA pATA vacce UbhA rahIne hAtha halAvato joyo. sAravAranAM jarUrI sAdhano laIne solisa tarata ja e pATA tarapha doDavA lAgyo ane eno sAthI peTrisIo henerA eNmbulansamAMthI thoDI vadhu sAmagrI laIne enI pAchaLa jhaDapabhera doDyo. rikArDo morAlisa embulansa mATe phona karavA gayo, tyAre DeniyelA 106 + mATIe ghaDavAM mAnavI sAme eka navI Aphata khaDI thaI. enI AjubAju jaMgalI kUtarAo ene phADI khAvA mATe dhasI rahyA. solise jorathI bUmo pADIne kUtarAone dUra haTAvavA prayatna karyo. DeniyelA vedanAbharI cIso pADatI hatI. enA zarIramAMthI puSkaLa lohI vahI gayuM hatuM, tema chatAM e pramANamAM svastha ane jAgrata lAgatI hatI. enI madade AvelA mANasone jotAM ja e tarata ja potAnuM nAma, mAtApitAnuM nAma, phona naMbara ane enA bIjA tabIba kAkAonAM nAma bolavA lAgI. eNmbyulansanA sahAyakone paNa thayuM ke ATalI gaMbhIra IjA thayA pachI ane zarIramAMthI ATaluM badhuM lohI vahI gayA bAda bhAgye ja koI ATalI svasthatA rAkhI zake ane ATalI spaSTatAthI bolI zake. eNmbyulansanA sahAyako A dazya joIne coMkI gayA hatA. spinala borDa ane bIjAM sAdhano laIne e doDI AvyA. eNmbyulansanA hererAe enA sAthIne prazna karyo, 'A marI gaI lAge che ?' DeniyelAe A prazna sAMbhaLIne Azcarya vyakta karyuM ne kSaNabhara vicAryuM ke zuM huM mRtyu pAmI chuM ? 'nA, huM mRtyu pAmI nathI'. evA DeniyelAnA avAjano raNako gAjI UThyo. eNmbulansanA sahu sAthI sahAyakone e sparzI gayo. DeniyelAne tAtkAlika sahAya ApavAmAM AvI, paraMtu evAmAM ekAeka najIkanA pATAo dhrUjavA lAgyA. dhIre dhIre enjinanI heDalAiTano prakAza patharAyo ane bAjumAM ja bIjA pATA hovAthI A badhA lokone mATe DeniyelAnI pAse UbhA rahevuM khataranAka hatuM. emane bAjue khasI javuM paDe tema hatuM. solise DeniyelAne kahyuM, 'purajhaDape Trena AvI rahI che. amAre badhAe khasI javuM paDaze. Trena pasAra thayA pachI ame tarata ja pAchA AvIzuM.' 'mane choDIne jazo nahIM.' DeniyelA cIsa pADI UThI, paraMtu dhasamasatI Trena najIka AvatI hatI. tarata ja eNmbulansa TIma DeniyelAnI bAjuethI khasI gaI. koI pavanano bhayAnaka sapATo bhISaNa avAja sAthe pasAra thato hoya evuM Trena pasAra thatI hatI, tyAre DeniyelAe anubhavyuM. bAjumAM Ubhelo solisa A aMdhArI rAtre DeniyelAne joI zakato nahoto. ene pasAra thatI paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga * 107

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Trena eTalI badhI lAMbI lAgI ke manamAM ema thayuM ke jANe eno aMta ja nathI lAgato! Trena pasAra thatAM ja badhA DeniyalA tarapha doDI AvyA. emaNe joyuM ke pasAra thatI TrenanA pavanane kAraNe DeniyelA thoDI bAjue khasI gaI hatI, paraMtu taMtotaMta jIvatI hatI. eNmbulansa AvyAnI agiyAra miniTamAM to DeniyalAne ghaTanAsthaLe tAtkAlika sAravAra ApIne haoNspiTala tarapha laI javAmAM AvI. e enA DaoNkTara pitA ane kAkAnA phona naMbara bolatI hatI. DeniyelA haoNspiTalamAM pahoMcI pachI thoDI ja vAramAM enAM sagAMo paNa pahoMcI gayAM hatAM. eNe potAnA Aptajanone pUchayuM, 'huM sArI thaI jaIza ne !' thoDI vAra pachI DeniyelA ekAeka bebhAna thaI gaI. enA para tAtkAlika oparezana karavAmAM AvyuM. enA baMne hAtha ane baMne paga chUTA paDIne evA to chuMdAI gayA hatA ke te pharIthI joDI zakAya tema nahotA. DaoNkTare ene tAtkAlika sAravAra ApI, enA ghAne barAbara sApha karIne enA para TAMkA laI lIdhA. oNparezana thiyeTaramAMthI bahAra AvI, tyAre enAM mAtA-pitA ane eno mitra rikArDo AvI pahoMcyAM hatAM. emaNe DeniyalAne joI. eno avAja sAMbhaLyo ane e avAja mAM AtmavizvAsano raNako saMbhaLAyo. be hAtha ane be paga kapAI gayA hovAthI DeniyalAne asahya darda thatuM hatuM. DaoNkTaro ene dardazAmaka TaeNbleTa ane iMjekzana ApatA hatA, paraMtu tema chatAM enI vedanA para kAbU meLavI zakatA nahotA. Ama chatAM eNe hiMmata gumAvyA vinA anya upacAro vize vicAravAnuM zarU karyuM. eNe dhyAna ane re kInI madadathI potAnI A vedanAne ochI karI. doDha mahinA sudhI DeniyelAne haoNspiTalamAM rahevuM paDyuM. bhayAnaka akasmAtanI smRtinI sAthosAtha apAra zArIrika pIDA bhogavavI paDI. be hAtha ane be paga vinAnI yuvatI kare zuM ? e jIve kaI rIte ? paraMtu DeniyelA pAse jIvavAno makkama nirdhAra hato ane enA tabIba pitAnuM pUrepUruM. protsAhana hatuM. enA pitAe nakkI karyuM hatuM ke mAre DeniyelAne pharI haratIpharatI karavI che. enA caherA paranuM hAsya pAchuM ANavuM che. ene mATe emaNe DeniyalA mATe kRtrima aMgo meLavavAno prayAsa karyo. 108 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI kRtrima hAtha ane paganI madadathI cAlatI DeniyelA grAsiyA amerikAnA philADelphiyA rAjyanA moMsa rihebiliTezana senTaranuM nAma kRtrima aMgo banAvavA mATe ghaNuM pratiSThita gaNAtuM hatuM. DeniyalAne ahIM lAvavAmAM AvI ane enA kRtrima hAtha ane kRtrima paga banAvavAmAM AvyA. akasmAtanA traNa mahinA pachI DeniyalAnA kapAyelA paga para kRtrima paga besADavAmAM Avyo. e divase DeniyelA potAnA kRtrima paga para cAlI. apratima sAhasa karIne koI siddhi meLavI hoya evo sahune anubhava thayo. jiMdagI hArI besIe evI pratyeka ghaTanAne parAjita karanArI DeniyelA enA A jaMgamAM saphaLa thaI. kRtrima paga paherIne eNe pahelI vAra cAlavAnuM zarU karyuM, tyAre enI AMkhomAMthI AnaMdanAM AMsu sarI paDyAM ! enAM mAtApitA ane sTAphanA sabhyo bhAvavibhora banI gayA ane emanI AMkhomAMthI AMsu chalakAvA lAgyAM. DeniyelAne akasmAtanI vedanA to bhogavavAnI hatI, paNa enI sAthosAtha Akho divasa phijhiyotherApisTa ane DaoNkTaro pAse cAlavAnI, bhojana karavAnI paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga * 109

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ane kRtrima aMgo sAthe anya kArya karavAnI tAlIma ApavAmAM AvatI hatI. kyAreka DeniyelA kazuMka karavAmAM niSphaLa jatI, tyAre thoDI hatAza banI jatI. kyAreka cAlavA jatAM gabaDI paDatI ane badhA ene UbhI kare tyAre e raDI paDatI hatI. Ave samaye DaoNkTare ene kahyuM, 'tArI jiMdagI tArA hAthamAM che. ene kaI rIte pasAra karavI, e tAre vicAravAnuM che. jo Ama hatAza thaIne raDatI ja rahIza, to AkhI jiMdagI AMsuonA dariyAmAM DUbI jaze. jo e vicAra karIza ke tArI pAse je kaMI bacyuM che. eno mahattama upayoga karIne jiMdagInI punarracanA karavI che to tuM AgaLa vadhIza. tAre jIvavuM kaI rIte eno javAba tAre ApavAno che. bIjA koI pAse nathI.' DeniyelAe nakkI karyuM ke bhale niSphaLa jAuM. jamIna para paDI jAuM. thAkI jAuM, paraMtu hArI nahIM jAuM. game te thaze, topaNa kyAreya AMsu nahIM sAruM. deDha ane makkama manobaLa sAthe potAnI tamAma tAkAta kAme lagADIne eNe kasarata karavAnuM zarU karyuM. kRtrima paga sAthe cAlavAnuM zarU karyuM. muzkelIo to apAra AvatI hatI. muMjhavaNo to keTalIye thatI hatI. hatAzA enA jIvanamAM vAraMvAra DokiyAM karatI hatI, paraMtu DeniyelAe makkama manobaLa sAthe enA kRtrima pagathI cAlavAnuM zarU karyuM. e jANatI hatI ke e A kRtrima paga sAthe kyAreya doDI zakavAnI nathI, paNa tethI zuM ? muzkelImAMthI mArga zodhe te ja mAnavI. kRtrima paga vaDe DeniyelAe sAikala ane moTara calAvatAM zIkhI lIdhuM. kRtrima hAthane paNa barAbara keLavyo. bhojana karavAnuM to ThIka, paraMtu e hAthathI meka-apa karatAM paNa zIkhI lIdhuM ! akasmAtanuM eka varSa pUruM thayuM. pharI meDikala kaoNlejamAM praveza meLavyo. emAM jhaLahaLatI saphaLatA sAthe DaoNkTaranI padavI meLavI. paNa have mAtra ene DaoNkTara banIne besI rahevuM nahotuM. akasmAte enA para je AzIrvAda varasAvyo, tethI te have rihebiliTezana DokTara banavA cAhatI hatI. potAnAM samadukhiyAMone sahAya karavA mAgatI hatI. AthI DaoNkTaranI padavI meLavyA pachI eNe vadhu abhyAsa cAlu rAkhyo. emAM paNa eNe DigrI meLavI. duniyAnI e sarvaprathama kvAliTarala epyuTI (cAra vicchedita aMgovALI vyakti) phijhiziyana banI. eno artha e ke cAra kapAyelAM aMgovALA dardIone e sAravAra ApavA lAgI. DeniyalAnI AMgaLInI jagAe mAtra eka hUka hato. e hUkathI kamyuTara para besIne eNe enI anubhavakathA AlekhI. e pustakanuM nAma che 'Elegi Vivir' (Ai cUjha Tu liva). A pustaka prakAzita thatAM ja enI sATha hajAra pratonuM vecANa thayuM. DeniyelAne aneka khitAbo maLyA. Aje DeniyelA zAntiyAgonA cilDrana rihebiliTezana insTiTayUTamAM potAnI jema e kasmAtamAM bhoga banelI vyaktione AghAtamAMthI bahAra kADhIne jiMdagInI navesarathI goThavaNa karatAM zIkhave che ane zArIrika kSati dharAvatAM bALakone cAlatAM ane kArya karatAM zIkhave che. hajI DeniyelA sTeja khoDaMgAtI cAle che. A senTaramAM sAravAra letAM bALako kyAre ka ene sIdhesIdhuM pUche che ke "tame zA mATe khoDaMgAtI cAle cAlo cho ? tamArA hAthamAM hUka zA mATe che ?" DolatAM DolatAM DeniyelA javAba Ape che, 'mane A bahu game che. tamArA jevAM bALakonI jema DolavAnuM khUba game, kAraNa ke ema karavAthI tamArI sAthe jaladI dostI thaI jaze.' 110 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI paDakhAmAM mota ane jIvana mATeno jaMga + 1ll

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paheluM klinika | 'he DaoNkTaro ! dharatI dhrujI UThe evI tamArI jallAdagIrI koI paNa saMjogomAM baMdha thavI ja joIe.' viyenAnA DaoN. ignAjha semalvisanAM A AkrozabharyA vAkyoe samagra yuropanA DaoNkTaromAM hAhAkAra macAvI dIdho, paNa AvAM jalada vidhAnone kAraNe sahu koInuM dhyAna A bhejAbAja DaoNkTara tarapha khecAyuM. 13 e jamAnAmAM samagra yuropamAM azakta ane avaidha bALako mATe prasUtigRho racavAnI jhuMbeza cAlatI hatI. abhAvagrasta garIba mahilAnI athavA to rUpajIvinI strIonAM bALakone prasUti karAvavAnuM kAma A prasUtigRho saMbhALatAM hatAM, A strIone vinAmUlya prasUtinI sagavaDatA apAtI. vaLatara rUpe AvI strIone klinikanuM nAnuM-moTuM kAma DaoN. IgnAjha semalvisa soMpavAmAM AvatuM ane vakhata Avye DaoNkTaro ane dAyaNonA kAmamAM e madadarUpa banatI. A haoNspiTalamAM kAma karatAM prophesara jahona klAnanA madadanIza tarIke ignAjha semalvisanI nimaNUka thaI. ignAjha haoNspiTalanA mukhya resiDenTa DaoNkTara tarIke kAmagIrI bajAvatA hatA. prophesara jhona klAna savAre rAunDa le, te pahelAM e dardIone tapAsato hato. prasUtimAM pArAvAra muzkelI paDI hoya tevA kesa para najara rAkhato hato. prasUtizAstranA vidyArthIone abhyAsa karAvato hato, eTaluM ja nahIM, paNa dardIonI vigato paNa rAkhato hato. | viyenAnI A haoNspiTalamAM be prasUtigRho hatAM. banatuM evuM ke emAM pahelAM prasUtigRhamAM paraperaTyuala phIvarathI vadhu mAtAonAM mRtyu nIpajatAM hatAM ane e samaye A tAvane 'cAilDabeDa phIvara' kahevAmAM Avato hato. ignAjhane Azcarya e thatuM ke eka ja haoNspiTalanA pahelA klinikamAM mAtAonAM mRtyuno dara ghaNo UMco hato ane bIjA klinikamAM sAva ocho hato ! keTalIka mAtAo to DaoN. ignAjha pAse jaIne AjIjI karatI hatI ke emane apazukaniyALa pahelA klinikanA badale bIjA klinikamAM dAkhala karavAmAM Ave. ethIya vadhu AghAtajanaka ghaTanA e hatI ke keTalIka strIo motanA mukha jevA pahelA klinikamAM prasuti karAvavAne badale rastA para bALakane janma ApavAnuM pasaMda karatI hatI. AvI rIte zerImAM bALakane janma Ape ane DaoNkTarane khoTI rIte kahetI ke haoNspiTalamAM AvatI hatI, e daramiyAna rastAmAM ekAeka A prasUti thaI. AvI strIone bALakonI saMbhALa mATe maLatI sarakArI sahAya maLI rahetI ane motanA tAMDava samI haoNspiTalanA prasUtigRhamAM dAkhala thatAM UgarI jatI ! ignAjha vicAravA lAgyo ke AnuM kAraNa zuM ? eka ja haoNspiTalanAM be klinikamAM mRtyudaramAM ATalo taphAvata kema ? pahelA klinikamAM dasa TakA strIo mRtyu pAmatI hatI, jyAre bIjA klinikamAM cAra TakAthI paNa ochI strIo mRtyu pAmatI hatI. AmAM paNa inAjhane sauthI moTI muMjhavaNa to tyAre thaI ke zerIomAM zizuone janma ApatI mAtAomAM to A roganuM pramANa nahivat hatuM, tyAM mRtyudaranI vAta kevI ! ignAjha sAme sauthI moTo koyaDo e hato ke samAna sAravAra hovA chatAM pahelA klinikamAM mRtyudara ATalo badho UMco kema ? eNe Ano UMDo vicAra karyo. paheluM klinika * 113

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mULe to ignAjha cheka haMgerI dezanA buDApesTathI viyenAmAM kAyadAno abhyAsa karavA Avyo hato. eka vAra potAnA DaoNkTara dostanI sAthe pradarzanamAM laTAra mAravA nIkaLyo. zarIravijJAnanuM e pradarzana joIne ignAjhane eTalI prabaLa jijJAsA jAgI ke eNe kAyadAnAM pustako bArI bahAra pheMkI dIdho ane tabIbI vidyAmAM praveza meLavyo. enI AMkhomAM aneruM teja hatuM. cittamAM satata jijJAsA rahetI, koI paNa vAtane e rahasyamaya mAnIne cittamAMthI tilAMjali Apato nahIM, paNa e koyaDAo ukelIne ja citta-zAMti pAmato ! DaoNkTarIno abhyAsa zarU karyo tyAre viSayanI pasaMdagI paNa vicitra rIte karI. loko saraLa viSaya pasaMda kare, ene badale ignAjhe e samaye agharAmAM agharo viSaya gaNAtA prasUtizAstrano abhyAsa zarU karyo. ema.DI.nI DigrI meLavyA pachI e viyenAnA prasUti vibhAgamAM joDAyo. eNe pahele ja mahine joyuM ke A prasUtivibhAgamAM e dAkhala thayo tyAre 208 strIo che ane mahinAne Akhare emAMnI 36 mRtyu pAmI che. ATalAM badhAM mRtyue ignAjhanA aMtarane valovI nAkhyuM. eNe joyuM ke e samaye bALakane janma Apavo eTale mAtAne mATe mRtyunI sAthe khela khelavAnuM gaNAtuM hatuM. zizune navajIvana maLe ane enI mAtAne akALa mRtyu sAMpaDe. bagalAnI pAMkha jevA dhoLA-lAMbA jhabhA paherIne ane gaLAmAM sTethoskopa lagAvIne, meDikala sAyansanA moTA moTA vajanadAra zabdono upayoga karatA ane vorDamAM pharatA DaoNkTarothI ignAjha judo tarI Avato hato. prasUtigRhanA bIjA DaoNkTarone mATe ATalAM badhAM mRtyunI saheje ciMtA thatI nahotI, kAraNa ke teo AvAM mRtyu jovA mATe TevAI gayA hatA, paraMtu A prasUtAonuM akALe thatuM mota ignAjhanA hRdayane bhaDake baLatuM hatuM. enA dilamAM sauthI vadhu vedanA to e hatI ke e vorDamAM pharatI vakhate A strIo samakSa jato, tyAre A strIo enI sAme karagarIne kahetI, sAheba, mane sAruM thaI jaze ne ? huM jIvatI to rahIza ne?" AvI strIonA dayAmaNA caherA joIne ignAjha caherA para kRtrima hAsya coMTADIne kaheto. 'nA, nA, bahena gabharAIza nahIM, tane sAruM thaI 1l4 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI prasUti karAvatI strI ane DaoN. ignAjha jaze.' hoThathI A zabdo uccArato hato, paNa enA hRdayamAM cIrA paDatA hatA. e jANato hato ke enA A zabdo daMbhI che, enA A zabdomAM bhArobhAra jUThANuM che. AvI rogagrasta mAtAo Atura nayane jANe koI uddhAraka ke tAraNahArane joI rahI hoya, e rIte ignAjha tarapha AzAbharI AMkho mAMDatI hatI. e AMkhomAM yAcanA hatI, ji jIviSA hatI, jiMdagI jIvavAnA koDa hatA. e rogagrasta strI thoDuM pANI mAgatI. hajI e eno ghUMTaDo pUro thAya te pahelAM pharI pANI mAgatI. e pIve te pahelAM vaLI pAchI mAgatI. ignAjha emanA tarapha joto hato. dilamAM bhAre bhaya hato. mukha para banAvaTI phUlo jevuM smita rAkhato ane sAthe emanA nADInA dhabakArA gaye jato hato. enA dhabakArA niyamita thatAM ignAjhanA caherA para AnaMda chavAI jato hato. ghaNI vAra evuM paNa banatuM ke A mAtAonA hAtha, paga ane mukha para bhUrA raMganA DAgha UpasI AvatA. A bhUrA raMganA DAgha zA mATe che ema dardIne sahetuka pUchato nahIM, e mATe inAjha emane bIjI vAta tarapha vALato hato. paheluM klinika * 115

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emanAM bALakonAM nAma pUchato hato ane mIThI vAtothI emane AnaMdita rAkhavA yatna karato hato, paraMtu sAthosAtha A rogagrasta mAtA dhIre dhIre motanA mukhamAM sarakI rahI che e paNa jANato hato. A prasUtigRhamAM eNe aneka strIone prasUti pachI mRtyu pAmatI joI. enA sAthI DaoNkTaro to AvAM mRtyunA kAraNane koI meDikala Tarma dvArA batAvatA hatA, paraMtu ignAjhanA manamAM aneka koyaDAo hatA. zA mATe rastA para prasRti karanArI strIonAM bALako jIve che ane A pahelA klinikamAM janma ApanArI strIone ghaNI suvidhA hovA chatAM mota pAme che ? zuM A paheluM klinika zApita che ke jene kAraNe mRtyuno dara vadhI rahyo che ? kyAreka ignAjha akaLAIne potAnA 'sAheba' pro. jhona klenane A savAla pUchato, to uttaramAM enA vibhAganA sarvocca pada para birAjelA pro. klena javAba ApatA, 'are, AvAM mRtyu to ame keTalAMya joI nAkhyAM. emAM phikara zI karavAnI ? amane ema lAge che ke A mRtyu nipajAvanArI koIka adRzya zakti che.' A uttara ignAjha svIkAre evI enI buddhi nahotI. enuM jijJAsu mana satata vicAratuM ke 'pahelA klinikamAM eka ja varSamAM 451 strIo A jIvaleNa rogano zikAra banI ane 'bIjA klinika'mAM enAthI mAtra pAMcamA bhAganI strIo mRtyu pAmI, AvuM kema ? e prazna ignAjhane pajavavA lAgyo. vaLI e samaye pahelA vorDamAM rivavAra, maMgaLavAra, guruvAra ane zanivAre strIone prasUtigRhomAM dAkhala karavAmAM AvatI hatI ane bIjA klinikamAM soma, budha ane zukravAre praveza apAto hato, ene manamAM thayuM ke A ravivAra, maMgaLavAra, guruvAra ane zanivAre dAkhala thayelI strIonuM mRtyu pramANa ATaluM badhuM kema ? potAnA vibhAganA vaDAe kahyuM che tema koI addezya zaktinuM A kAma haze ? ignAjhe Ano jhINavaTabharyo abhyAsa zarU karyo, kAraNa eTaluM ja ke e ema mAnato ke jo e A koyaDo ukelI zake nahIM ane AvI rIte kazAka kAraNasara akALa mRtyu pAmatI mAtAone bacAvI zake nahIM, to enuM jIvyuM dhULa barAbara che. 116 * mATIe ghaDacAM mAnavI ignAjhe enI saMzodhanadraSTi kAme lagADI. eNe roga thavAnI ekeeka zakyatAo tapAsI. tapAsa karatAM karatAM e cheka AvA dardIonI dhArmika mAnyatAo cakAsavA sudhI pahoMcI gayo ! emAM ene eka ja phera dekhAyo ke pahelA klinikamAM meDikalanAM vidyArthIone prAyogika zikSaNa ApavAmAM AvatuM hatuM, jyAre bIjA klinikamAM prasUtinuM kArya karanArI mahilAone zikSaNa apAtuM. kadAca vadhu paDatI 'dardIonI bhIDa'ne kAraNe AvuM thatuM haze, paNa eNe joyuM ke bIjA klinikamAM vadhu dardIo hovA chatAM mRtyudara ocho hato. joyuM ke AsapAsanuM vAtAvaraNa paNa kazAya kAraNarUpa nathI. baMne klinika samAna paristhiti ane vAtAvaraNamAM kAma kare che. ghaNI vAra evuM paNa banatuM ke e savAre hajI sagaDI para cA paNa mukAI na hoya tyAre hAthamAM ojAro laIne AgalI sAMje pAMca divasanA bALakane A duniyAmAM choDIne mRtyu pAmelI koI mAtAnA zabane zabagharamAM cIrato jovA maLato. kyAreka potAnA vidyArthIone laIne motadAyI pahelA klinika tarapha te dhasato ane enI ThaMDI AMgaLIothI prasUti pAmavAnI taiyArI karI rahelI koI mAtAnA zarIrane tapAsato hato. Ama eka samaye e eka mAtAnA nirjIva dehane cIrato hoya ane bIjA samaye koI prasUtAnA zarIrane tapAsato hoya. mRta ane jIvaMta zarIra vaccenA A vArApherA ene UMDA vicAramAM DubADI detA. ghaNI vAra to zabagharanI durgaMdha enAM vastromAM ghara karI jatI. e pachI mAtAnA zarIrane tapAsatI vakhate sAbuthI hAtha dhoto, paraMtu e dhovAyelA hAthamAMthI durgaMdha jatI nahotI. Akhare eka tapAsa samiti nimAI. e tapAsa samitimAM anubhavI kherakhAM DaoNkTaro hatA. pahelA klinikanA UMcA mRtyudare khaLabhaLATa macAvyo hato. enA ukela mATe nimAyelI A tapAsa samitinA DaoNkTaroe ArAmakhurazImAM nirAMta pharamAvatAM evuM tAraNa ApyuM ke "pahelA klinikamAM DaoNkTaro temaja vidyArthIo dardIne tapAsatA hatA tene kAraNe mRtyu thatAM hatAM, jyAre bIjA klinikamAM DaoNkTaro ane vidyArthIone AvuM kazuM zIkhavA mATe paravAnagI nahotI. dardIo para judA judA prayogo thatA nahotA. dardInA paheluM klinika * 117

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zarIramAM DaoNkTaranI AMgaLI pharatI nahotI. vaLI emAM mukhya kAma narsa, dAyaNo ane suyANIo ja kare che." e divase sAMje ignAjha enI oNphisamAM beTho hato ane enAthI thoDe dUra AvelA eka khaMDamAMthI dhImuM rudana saMbhaLAvA lAgyuM. thoDI vAramAM to enI oNphisa pAsethI smazAnayAtrA pasAra thaI. e divasanuM A lAgalagATa cothuM mRtyu hatuM. mRtyughaMTano raNakAra enA kAne athaDAyo ane ignAjha enA kAnamAM AMgaLI khosI Amatema AMTA mAravA lAgyo. vedanA vadhatAM e khurazI para phasaDAI paDyo. enI AMkhanAM AMsu rokI zakyo nahIM. hatheLIthI DhaMkAyelA enA mukha paranAM AMsu e chupAvavA lAgyo. pelo koyaDo hajI enA manane ane jIvane jaMpa levA deto nahoto. A e jamAnAnI vAta che jyAre sUkSmadarzaka yaMtra zodhAyuM nahotuM, mAtra thoDA samaya pUrve robarTa kosTa nAmanA saMzodhake jAhera karyuM hatuM ke 'jaMtuo paNa roganuM kAraNa banI zake che.' DaoN. ignAjha semasei A jaMtuo najare joyAM nahotAM, paraMtu AvAM jaMtuone kAraNe 'cAilDabeDa phIvara'thI prasUtA mAtAonuM mRtyu thatuM haze, evo vicAra inAjhanA manamAM jAgyo. ignAjhe klorinayukta pANIthI hAtha dhovAno Agraha rAkhyo, paNa enA vicArano ghaNAe virodha karyo. Ano sAcA dilathI svIkAra karavAne badale 'eNe saMzodhanane nAme kazuMya navuM kahyuM nathI ' ema kahIne AkhI vAta ane vicArane phagAvI devAmAM Avyo. ignAjhanA eka vidyArthIe A viSayamAM laMDananI royala maeNDikala enDa sarjikala sosAyaTImAM potAnuM saMzodhanapatra rajU karyuM ane e pachI enAM tAraNo eNe phrAMsanAM sAmayikomAM paNa pragaTa karyo. viyenAnA prasUtigRhamAM ghaTelA mAtAnA mRtyudaranI vAta dhIre dhIre phelAvA lAgI ane A AMkaDAo ja lokone jAgrata karaze ema ignAjha mAnato hato. klorinathI hAtha dhovAnI vAta sahu svIkAraze evI enI dhAraNA hatI ane ema thavAthI ghaNI strIonA prANa bacI zakaze evI ene AzA hatI, paraMtu ignAjhanI vAta ekAeka prasaratAM keTalAka vicitra pratibhAvo paNa maLyA. keTalAke kahyuM ke A to sAva sAmAnya vAta che, to keTalAke kahyuM ke aMgreja saMzodhaka oNlivara haoNnse A vAta ghaNA samaya pUrve 118 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI haoNspiTalamAM kahI che ane eNe kahyuM hatuM ke 'cAilDabeDa phIvaramAM jaMtugrasta vyakti enuM inTezana bIjAne lagADI zake che.' ignAjhe pote nahIM, paNa enA A saMzodhananAM tAraNo enA sAthIo ane vidyArthIoe lakhyAM hovAthI keTalAka loko ene barAbara samajyA nahIM ane AvI kaTokaTInI paLe ignAjhe pote A viSaya para kazuM pragaTa karyuM nahIM. Ane kAraNe enA saMzodhana para vivAdanuM vAdaLa satata chavAyeluM rahyuM. koI lekha lakhavAne badale athavA to viyenAnA saMzodhakonI vacce potAnI vAta pragaTa karavAne badale sahu koI A saccAI svIkAraze ja, tema mAnato hato. e samaye oNsTriyAmAM rAjakIya vAvaMToLa Avyo ane emAM 1948nI 13mI mArce viyenAmAM vidyArthIoe gunegArane jyurI dvArA TrAyala karavA mATe kAyado karavAno ane abhivyaktinuM svAtaMtrya ApavA mATeno moraco kADhyo. be divasa pachI haMgerImAM paNa Avo moraco nIkaLyo. viyenAmAM A moracA sAthe ignAjhane kazoya saMbaMdha na hato chatAM enA tarapha zaMkA sevavAmAM AvI, kAraNa ke e mULa haMgerIno vatanI hato. paheluM klinika * I19.

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ignAjhano viyenAnI haoNspiTalano kAryakALa pUrNa thato hato, tyAre kArya brama nAmanA eka DaoNkTare arajI karI. ignAjha ane bUma be ja umedavAra hatA ane aMte emAM bUmanI pasaMdagI karavAmAM AvI. ignAjha punaH bekAra banI gayo. eka Akhoya ziyALo eNe aMgrejI bhASAnA abhyAsamAM gALyo. iMglenDa ane DablinanI haoNspiTalonAM prasUtigRhomAM maraNapramANa zA mATe ochuM che, enI e zodha karavA cAhato hato. evAmAM bUme bIje nimaNuka svIkAratA ignAjhane viyenAnI haoNspiTala taraphathI punaH nimaMtraNa pAThavavAmAM AvyuM. ignAjhane e haoNspiTalamAMthI jAkAro maLyo hato, tethI tyAM pAchA javAnuM nAma che ke nahIM, paraMtu potAnuM saMzodhana AgaLa vadhAravA mATe ane seMkaDo strIonA prANa bacAvavA khAtara ene javuM Avazyaka lAgyuM. potAnI adhUrI sAdhanA e pUrNa karavA cAhato hato. | viyenAnA motane mAphaka AvI gayelA 'pahelA klinikamAM ignAjha ghUmavA lAgyo. pharI mRtyunI A ghaTanAo sAme eNe potAnuM saMzodhana zarU karyuM. Akho divasa e zabatharamAM ja purAI raheto, eka divasa eNe jANyuM ke petholojI viSayanA niSNAta ane tenA priya mitra kolaTeskane oparezana daramiyAna charIno jakhama thatAM enA lohImAM jhera prasarI gayuM ane e kAraNe e mRtyu pAmyo. A ghaTanA sAMbhaLatAM ja ignAjhanuM citta camakI UThyuM. eNe kolaTeksanA zarIra para thayelI zastrakriyAno ahevAla vAMcyo. e jema vAMcato gayo, tema tema enA zarIramAM AchI kaMpArI thavA lAgI. ahevAla vAMcyo, dAMta bhIMsA, cahero taMga banyo ane magaja cagaDoLe caDyuM. zuM A prasUtimAM thatA mRtyune ane lohImAM jhera prasaravAne koI saMbaMdha haze kharo ? ane ekAeka ene sUjhayuM, e vicAramAM paDI gayo. ghaNI vAra e mRtyu pAmelI strIonA mRtadeho cIrato hato, chatAM ene e sUjhayuM nahotuM. e mRtadehanA zarIramAM jhera prasareluM ene dekhAtuM nahotuM. have ene samajAyuM ke jo parezananA charInA jakhamathI zarIranA lohImAM jhera phelAI zake tyAre prasUti pAmatI strIonA garbhAzayamAM to jakhama hoya ja eTale to emanA lohImAM jhera khUba jhaDapathI prasare. 120 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI ignAjhanuM citta vyAkuLa banyuM. e satata manomaMthana karavA lAgyo ane enA navanIta rUpe enA manamAM prazna jAgyo. A jIvaleNa jhera AvyuM kyAMthI? dhIre dhIre samajAyuM ke e jhera haoNspiTalanI bahArathI nahIM, koI bIjA rogane kAraNe nahIM, paraMtu e mAraka jhera to e pote ane enA vidyArthIo ja laI jatA hatA. kAraNa eTaluM ja ke mRtadehane cIryA pachI enI e ja charI teo prasUti mATenA oNparezanamAM vAparatA hatA, oparezana pUrve hAtha dhotA, paga dhotA, paNa jIvaleNa jherano charImAMthI cepa jato nahoto. enA manamAM A vicAro jAgI UThyA. ene hacamacAvI denAruM satya chevaTe samajAyuM. bIjA klinikamAM strIono mRtyudara ocho hato eno ene tAga maLI gayo. tyAM zastrakriyA pUrve mRtadehone cIravAnuM kAma thatuM nahotuM. Ama strIonA motanuM kAraNa DaoNkTaro ane enA sAthIo ja kahevAya. e pote ja AvA motano gunegAra gaNAya. ignAjhane A satya lAdhyA pachI e enA hAtha sAbuthI khUba dhue che. e pachI klorina vAyuvALA pANInA vAsaNamAM e bole che. hAthane eTalA badhA coLI coLIne cIkaNA thaI jAya tyAM sudhI dhue che. vaLI vacce hAthane suMdhIne khAtarI kare che ke pANImAM pUratuM klorina che ke nahIM. ene AvuM karatAM joIne sAthIo pAgala mAnatA hatA, enA keTalAka vidyArthIo enI majAka karatA hatA ane ekabIjAnA kAnamAM e vize vAta paNa karatA hatA. A pachI ignAjha enA vidyArthIone paNa AvI rIte karavAnuM pharamAna karato ane pachI vadhu mRtyune mATe badanAma thayelA evA 'prathama klinikamAM e mAtAonA palaMga pAse jato. AnuM pariNAma dhAryuM nahotuM eTaluM jhaDapathI jovA maLyuM. e prathama klinikamAM mRtyunuM pramANa 18 TakA hatuM. menA chellA aThavADiyAmAM AvI rIte klorinayukta pANIthI hAtha dhovAnuM zarU karyuM. pachInA ja mahine eno jAdu jovA maLyo. jUna mahinAmAM A maraNapramANa che TakA thaI gayuM ane julAImAM mAtra eka TakA, bIjA vorDanA maraNa pramANa karatAMya ochuM ! ignAjhanI A zodhanI DaoNkTaronI duniyAne koI paravA nahotI. haoNspiTalo eka ja cIle cAlatI hatI. adhyApako pustakiyA jJAnamAM DUbelA paheluM klinika * 121

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hatA. ignAjhanI umara paNa pUrI trIsa varSanI nahotI ane viyenAnA DaoNkTarone haMgerIthI AvelA ignAjhanI vAto citravicitra lAgatI. e to inAjhane 'buDApesTanA belagAma chokarA' tarIke oLakhatA hatA. nizcita cokaThAmAM cAlatI duniyA ignAjhanA A kAmanI kyAMthI kiMmata kare ? 56 TakA klorina dharAvatA ane sAva najIvI kiMmate maLatA bliciMga pAuDarathI keTalIya mAtAonA jIvanane mRtyu mukhamAMthI pAchA lAvavAnI eNe adbhuta zodha karI, paNa bIjA saMzodhakonI mAphaka eNe A vize moTA moTA lekho lakhyA nahIM, sabhAo gajavI nahIM. traNa adhyApakoe ene sAtha Apyo, paNa emAMthI ekeya prasUti-vighAnA niSNAta nahotA. ignAjhanI A saphaLatAmAM prophesara klAnane potAnI mAnahAni dekhAI. prophesara klAna oNsTriyAnA sattAdhArIonA TekedAra hatA. eNe kahyuM ke bAjunA mulka haMgerImAMthI Avelo ignAjha e baLavAkhorono moTo TekedAra che. aMte ignAjha sellelisa potAnA vatanamAM pAcho pharyo ane buDApesTamAM potAnI kAmagIrI zarU karI. pachInA cha varSamAM eNe karelAM eka hajAra oNparezanomAMthI mAtra ATha ja strIo maraNa pAmI hatI. ahIM eNe svacchatAnuM moTuM abhiyAna ja gAvyuM. haoNspiTalamAM durgadha mAratAM gaMdA godaDAMomAM potAnAM bALako sAthe strIo paDI rahetI hatI. rasoDAthI mAMDIne prayogazALA sudhI badhe ja gaMdakInuM sAmrAjya phelAyeluM hatuM. mAtA upara paDelA mRtyunA paDachAyAne dUra karavA prayAsa karyo ane 1856nA varSamAM haoNspiTalamAM eka paNa mAtAnuM mRtyu thayuM nahotuM. sAthI DaoNkTaro ignAjhanI A siddhi joIne adekhAInI AgathI baLatA hatA. e mAtra potAnA hAtha ja nahIM, paraMtu oNparezana mATenAM sAdhano, siriMja, pATAo, khATalAo ke palaMganI cAdara - e badhuM ja cokhkhuM rAkhavAno Agraha sevato. banyuM evuM ke haoNspiTale kharca ghaTADavAno TharAva karyo ane pariNAme dardIonAM vastro ane cAdaro rojeroja dhovAtAM baMdha thaI gayAM. eka dardInI cAdara bIje divase bIjA dardIne vAparavI paDatI hatI ane pariNAme pharI jheranuM jora prasaryuM ane maraNAMka vadhI gayo. A pratyeka maraNa ignAjhanA hRdayane hacamacAvI mUkatuM hatuM. e akaLAI 122 * mATIe ghaDavAM mAnavI prasUtA mAtAne jIvaleNa jhera kyAMthI lAgyuM tenI zodha karato ignAjha UThato, hAtha uchALato ane eka vAra to evo gusse bharAya ke vorDamAM jaIne vAsa mAratI betraNa cAdara kheMcI kADhI eno goTo vALyo ane bagalamAM mArIne sarakArI oNphisamAM pahoMcI gayo, amaladArane e badhuM suMdhADayuM ane amaladAra dhrUjI UThayo. ene sAna AvI. e pachI eNe bIjuM pagaluM bharyuM. sAmayikomAM lekho lakhavAnA zarU karyA ane emAM jAhera janatAne Agraha karyo ke tamArI patnI ke putrInI prasuti samaye jo DaoNkTaro bliciMga pAuDarathI saMpUrNapaNe hAtha dhue nahIM, to tyAM prasUti karAvazo nahIM. Ama janatAe inAjhanI A vAtane vadhAvI lIdhI. cotaraphathI evI bUma UThI ke AvI hatyAo to baMdha thavI ja joIe. enI varSonI mahenatane aMte ene mAtra be ja ziSyo maLyA. aMte moDe moDe paNa graMtha racyo. kazAya Akroza vagara sAva sIdhI sAdI bhASAmAM. enI vAta sAthe asaMmata thaIne phagAvI denArA eka prophesarane to eNe potAnA patramAM lakhyuM, 'to huM tane Izvara ane duniyAnI samakSa tamane khUnI tarIke jAhera karIza.' paheluM klinika * 123

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samaya jatAM enA Akroza ane uttejanAe enA magaja para viparIta asara karI. e pAgala banIne buDApesTanI zerIomAM rakhaDato hato. duniyA jyAre ignAjhane deva mAnavA mAMDI hatI, tyAre e pAgala avasthAmAM jiMdagI basara karato hato. ane samaya jatAM pAMjarAmAM purAIne ene jIvavuM paDyuM hatuM. pAgalakhAnAnA cokIdAroe ene khUba mAra mAryo hato ane aMte 47mA varSe aneka mAtAono tAraNahAra A mAnavI nyumoniyAthI mRtyu pAmyo. 'suparamaeNna'no sauthI moTo 'rola' azakyane zakya karato philmano vikhyAta 'suparamaeNna' vAstavajIvanamAM 'suparamena' banI rahyo. A 'suparamaeNna' eTale vikhyAta abhinetA krisTophara rIva, khelakUdavIranI kasAyelI kAyA, prabhAvazALI cahero, sAmenI vyaktinI hRdayasoMsarI UtarI jAya evI vAdaLI AMkho. AnAthI krisTophara rIva philmasRSTi para chavAI gayo hato. 1995nI 27mI mee ghoDesavArI karatAM thayelA akasmAtamAM karoDarajju para thayelI IjAne kAraNe krisTophara rIvano enA khabhAthI zarIrano nIceno bhAga paMcalisisathI niSkriya banI gayo. philmanA paDadA para gheDatA, UDatA, adbhuta kAryo karatA A philma adAkArane zvAsa levA mATe 'laeNnTileTara'nI jarUra paDavA lAgI. suparamena tarIke philmanA paDadA para aneka herataaMgejha abhinaya karanAra krisTophara rIva vhIlacaeNra vagara besI zakato nahIM. poTebala krisTophara rIva 124 * mATIe ghaDacAM mAnavI

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venTileTaranI sAthe jIvavuM paDatuM hatuM. addabhuta mAnavIya parAkramo batAvanAra adAkAra sAva niSkriya majabUra mAnavI banI gayo, paraMtu krisTophara rIte hIlaceramAM besIne lAcAra ane paravaza banIne jIvana gujAravAne badale potAnI jiMdagInI navI AzAone ghATa ApavA mAMDyo. eNe karoDarajjunI IjAne kAraNe pakSAghAta pAmelAone mATe navAM saMzodhano karIne sAravAra-paddhati zodhavAno jaMga Adaryo. Ane mATe eNe svayaM amerikAnI karoDarajaju aMge saMzodhana karatI khyAtiprApta laeNboreTarIonI mulAkAta lIdhI. perAlisisane kAraNe paravaza banelA mAnavIne svAvalaMbI banAvavAno nirdhAra karyo. judA judA prayogo karyA. eka samaye ene potAnI tarasa chipAvavA mATe jyusano glAsa moDhe mAMDavo hoya to trIseka miniTa lAgatI hatI. ene potAnA paheraveza para eka bIjo poSAka paheravo paDato, ke jethI e nAsto kare e pachI poSAka kADhI levAmAM Ave. pariNAme ene vAraMvAra vastro badalavAM na paDe. apAra lokacAhanA pAmelI philmomAM 'suparamenanI bhUmikA bhajavanAra krisTophara rIte karoDarajajunI IjAne kAraNe lAcAra ane majabUra banI gayelAonI sAravArane mATe jhuMbeza calAvI. vizvanI nyurosAyansa laeNboreTarImAM eNe saMzodhano mATe Arthika sahAya ApI. rAve ApelI Arthika sahAyane kAraNe amerikAnI naeNzanala insTiTyUTa oNpha heltha jAherAta karI ke eNe eka evo sela zodhyo che ke je mAnavazarIramAM vikasI zake. rIvane AvuM saMzodhana karAvavAnI preraNA prANIo pAsethI maLI. eNe joyuM ke karoDarajaju para IjA pAmanAra prANIo pharI hAlatAM-cAlatAM ane haratAM-pharatAM thaI jAya che. ene A tAraNa maLyuM tethI rIvanA AnaMdano pAra na rahyo. eNe vicAryuM ke prANIo jo AvI IjA bAda pharI aMgonuM halanacalana karI zakatAM hoya, to mANasa kema na karI zake ? AthI karoDarajjumAM 'injana' mAraphate evAM tattvo dAkhala karavAM ke je navA 'sela" UbhA kare ane magaja ane karoDarajaju vacceno saMbaMdha punaH sthApita kare. suparamaeNna rIva be ja laganI sAthe jIvavA lAgyo. : eka to A saMzodhana mATe moTuM phaMDa ekaThuM karIne potAnA jevA aneka dardIone pharI hAlatA-cAlatA karavA. bIjuM kAma e ke potAnA zarIrane AvI kaparI sthitimAM paNa barAbara custa rIte jALavavuM. 126 * mATIe paDayAM mAnavI krisTophara rIva kahe te karI batAve tevI mATIno mAnavI hato. AthI vhIlaceranA sahAre e potAnA gharanA jigneziyamamAM javA lAgyo. enA madadanIzo 190 pAunDa vajana dharAvatA suparamenane upADatA hatA ane ene mATe khAsa taiyAra karelAM karoDarajajunI IjAthI pakSaghAta pAmelo sAdhano vacce mUkatA hatA. A krisTophara rIva sAdhano para kasarata karIne e enA masalsane majabUta ane cetanavaMtA rAkhI zakato hato. paeNrAlisisanA dardIone svastha ane punaH kAryarata karavAnI enI caLavaLamAM lokone rasa paDavA lAgyo. Aja sudhI kyAreya AvA dardIo tarapha koInuM dhyAna gayuM nahotuM, paraMtu krisTophara rIvanI kahAnIe ane enA puruSArthe AkhI duniyAnuM karoDarajajune kAraNe majabUra jIvana gujAratAM hajAro mAnavIo tarapha dhyAna AkarSita karyuM. eNe amerikana koMgresa samakSa A viSaya para pravacano ApyAM, jene kAraNe amerikAnI sarakAre AnA saMzodhana mATe jaMgI rakama phALavI. mAtra amerikAnI ja vAta karIe to amerikAmAM karoDarajjunI IjAne kAraNe paeNlisisa pAmelA aDhI lAkha loko hatA ane emAM dara varSe dasa hajAra lokono umero thato jato hato. karoDarajju paranI IjAthI pairAlisisa pAmelA dardI sAme Aje DaoNkTara hAtha dhoIne besI jAya che ane kahe che ke karoDarajjunA 'narsa selsa' eka vAra IjA pAmyA pachI haMmezAM IjAgrasta ja rahe che. emAM kazuM thaI zake nahIM. mAtra paMdara varSa pahelAM nyuroTropika phekTaranI madadathI 'narsa selsa' pharI cetanavaMtA karavAnuM tattva zodhAyuM che. have sauthI moTuM kAma to AvA dardIone magaja ane karoDarajaju vacceno saMdezAvyavahAra zarU thAya te mATenI AMtarika 'phona lAina' goThavavAnuM che. DaoNkTaro ema mAne che ke thoDA samayamAM ja teo tUTelI karoDarajaju sAthe 'narsa selsa 'ne joDI zakaze. 'suparamenano sauthI moTo 'rola' * 27

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bhalAInI bhIkha rIva enA gharamAM satata kAma karato raheto. e sAikala calAvato. enA paga sAthe ilekTroDa Tepa lagADavAmAM AvatA hatA, jenAthI enA masalsa cetanavaMtA rahetA ane e sAikalanA paiDala lagAvI zakato hato. e kaheto ke vyakti jeTalI vadhu 'phiTa' hoya, teTalI jhaDapathI e sAjI thaI zake. perAlisisa sAme yuddhe caDelo suparamena 'rIva' vadhu ne vadhu phaMDa ekaThuM karavA lAgyo. e ema mAnato ke jeTaluM vadhu phaMDa maLaze eTaluM vadhu jhaDapI saMzodhana thaze ane A dardanA nivAraNanI paddhati zodhI zakAze. kyAreya pote lAcAra, majabUra ke ezakta che ema e mAnato ke vicArato nahoto.. I. sa. 1995mAM ene A akasmAta thayo, tyAra pachI e satata potAnI jAte Ubho thavAno ja vicAra karato hato. e enA khabhAne halAvI zakato. zvAsa levA mATenA 'venTileTara' vagara thoDA kalAko pasAra karI zakato hato. AvI hAlatamAM e amerikAnAM eka pachI eka rAjyomAM ghUmI vaLyo. eTaluM ja nahi, paNa saMzodhana mATe dilacaspIthI UMDI tapAsa karato rahyo. e ema kaheto ke jIvanamAM A eno sauthI moTo 'rola' che. jIvananA raMgamaMca paranI A tenI sauthI kaparI paDakArabharI bhUmikA hatI.. paeNrAlisisa sAmenA yuddhamAM ene koI kalAkA sAthenI harIphAImAM TakavAnuM nahotuM, paraMtu potAnI jAta sAthenA ane mazIna sAthenA saMgharSamAM jIvananI pratyeka paLe laDavAnuM hatuM. 2004nI 10mI oNkTobare mahAna amerikana abhinetA, digdarzaka, nirmAtA, lekhaka ane sevAbhAvI krisTophara rIvanuM avasAna thayuM, paNa eNe sthApelI saMsthAo Aje perAlisisa sAme mAnavajAtane AzIrvAdarUpa saMzodhana kare che. 15 A AkhIya Alama ajIbogarIba mAnavIthI bharelI che ! A mAnavInAM keTakeTalAM rUpa ? kevAM enAM kAma ane kevI enI icchA ! duniyA para najara karIe to ema lAge ke A duniyA eka ajAyaba ghara che. Avo ajAyabIbharyo eka mAnavI babberiyAnA sophiyA zaheramAM bhIkha mAgavA jAya che. bhIkha to zaheramAM ja maLe. vadhu dayAdAna karanArA paNa nagaramAM maLI jAya. A bhIkha mAgatA zatAyu DobrI Dobrevene koI bhikhArI kahetuM nathI. koI ene saMnyAsI kahe che, to koI ene devadUta mAne che. sophiyA zaheranI zerIomAM ghUmato DobrI dayAvAna mAnavIonA dilane DhaMDhoLato rahe che. e bhIkha mAge che, paNa potAne mATe nahIM. bhIkha mAgavA mATe ene Akho divasa bhUkhyA rahevuM paDe che, paNa enI ene koI phikara nathI. bhIkha mAgatI vakhate lAgatI kaDakaDatI DobrI Dobreve 128 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI

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ThaMDI ke tophAnI pavananI bIka nathI. basa, e to samayasara AvIne sophiyA zaheramAM bhIkha mAge che ane enI sAme bhalAI ane mAnavatAno khajAno lUMTALe jAya che. 1914nI 20mI julAIe banneriyAnA bAyalovo nAmanA gAmaDAmAM A DobrIno janma thayo. enA jIvana para vizvayuddhoe kAramA AghAta karelA che. prathama vizvayuddhamAM enA pitA haNAyA hatA ane bIjA vizvayuddha daramiyAna thatA baoNmbamArAmAM e jAtane bacAvIne jIvato hato. enI najIka baoNmba paDyo ane enA visphoTane kAraNe DobrI sadAne mATe zravaNazakti gumAvI beTho. pahelethI ja AdhyAtmika jhukAva dharAvatA DobrIne kyAreya jiMdagInAM bhautika sukhonuM AkarSaNa thayuM nathI. jAta ghasIne bIjAnA jIvanane ujALavAnI enI tamannA hatI ane tethI eNe eka vAra vicAra karyo ke jIvanamAM ATalo badho parigraha zAne ? ene maLatuM ekaso DaoNlaranuM penzana ene AjIvikA calAvavA mATe pUratuM hatuM. nAnakaDA oraDAmAM rahevuM ene phAvI gayuM hatuM. vaLI svAvalaMbananA pATha zIkhyo hovAthI ethI koI vizeSa avalaMbananI jarUra nahotI. potAnAM kapaDAM e pote jAte sIve, are ! moTA jADA bUTanI paNa e hAthe ja silAI kare. AthI caudeka varSa pahelAM eNe potAnA gharanI saghaLI cIjavastuo potAnA vatananA carcane dAnamAM ApavAno nirdhAra karyo ane carcanA nAnakaDA evA oraDAmAM sAdagIbharyuM jIvana vitAvavAnuM nakkI karyuM. DobrIno pahelo irAdo babberiyAnAM devaLo mATe phaMDa ekaThuM karavAno hato. jIvanamAM sAdagI ane bhItaramAM vairAgya hato. loko ene 'bAyalovonA saMta' tarIke oLakhavA lAgyA. samaya jatAM eNe enuM penzana paNa devaLanA jIrNoddhAra mATe arpaNa karI dIdhuM. eNe devaLonA jIrNoddhAra ane anAthAzramanA upayoga mATe pote bhIkha mAgIne bhegI karelI cAlIsa hajAra yuronI rakama dAnamAM ApI dIdhI. - DobrInI phakIrI jANIne babberiyAnA mukhya carce ene sahAya karavAnI taiyArI batAvI, tyAre A mAnavIe madada svIkAravAno dharAra inkAra karyo. eNe kahyuM ke ene potAne mATe koI madada joItI nathI. e to niHsvArthabhAve kAma karavA mATe 2kama meLave che. koI nAno bALaka ene nAnakaDI madada Ape, to enA mAsUma hAthane potAnI pAse laIne e cUmI le che ane A rIte A 130 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI loko mATe bhIkha mAgato DobrI Dobreve ekaso varSa vaTAvI cUkelA bujhurganI khyAti dezavidezamAM phelAvA lAgI. e bhIkha mAgato hoya che, paraMtu koI enA tarapha dhRNA dAkhave ke tiraskArabharI najare jue, topaNa enA manamAM koI durbhAva jAgato nathI, jyAre koI enA TambalaramAM sikko nAkhe, to enA pratye e AbhAranI lAgaNI pragaTa kare che. AjubAjunI duniyA bhale svArthI hoya, paraMtu DobrI enAthI saheje becena nathI. ene to pote je kaMI dhana meLave che, te devaLane zubhakAryo mATe dAnamAM ApavAnI icchA che. e pradezanI prajAmAM paropakAranI bhAvanAnuM siMcana karavA mAge che. ene kIrtinI koI khevanA nathI ke koInI pAse jaIne e kazI prasiddhinI apekSA rAkhato nathI. eka samaye pacIsa kilomITara pagapALA cAlIne sophiyA zaheramAM Avato DobrI have TrAma ke basamAM musApharI kare che. loko ene oLakhI jAya che. enI sAthe vAto karavA prayatna kare che. e paisA mATe kadI bhIkha mAgato nathI, paNa loko enI jhoLImAM dAna ApatA jAya che. enI bhalamanasAIthI bharelI AMkho, AnaMdadAyaka smita ane eno namratAbharyo koI yogI jevo dekhAva nihALavo lokone khUba game che, to keTalAka to ene saMta mAnIne enA AzIrvAda levA doDI Ave che. e icche che ke ene joIne vadhu ne vadhu loko bhautikasukha tyAgIne dAnanA mArge vaLe ane bIjAnA jIvanamAM upayogI thAya. DobrAnAM cAra saMtAnomAMthI be saMtAno jIvita che ane enI dIkarI A bujhurga bApanI saMbhALa rAkhe che. DobrInI A bhAvanAne darzAvatAM eno paDozI bhalAInI bhIkha * 31

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dhIre dhIre lokone paNa enA prayojanano khyAla AvI gayo che. enI bhAvanA samajAtI jAya che. eka mAnavI bIjAne mATe bhIkha mAge te kevuM? sAmAnya rIte Ajano mAnavI pote svArthaparAyaNa jIvana jIvato hoya che. potAne mATe ja saghaLuM karato hoya che. emAMya bhIkha mAganAra to mAtra potAnA peTanI ja ciMtA karato hoya che, jyAre A anokho bhikhArI bhAvi peDhInI citA kare che. prajAnI dharmazraddhAnI ene phikara che. emanAmAM AdhyAtmika saMskAra reDavAnI enI tamannA che. AvI tamannAne kAraNe Aje sophiyA zaheramAM DobrI eka jANItI vyakti banI gayo che. e paisA mAgato nathI, paNa ene dAne maLyA kare che. bALakathI mAMDIne vRddha sahu koI A DobrIne dAna Ape che ane DobrInI premALa AMkho, karacalIvALo camakato cahero, lAMbA lAMbA zveta vALa ane zveta dADhI joIne sAmI vyaktine enA AzIrvAda levAnuM mana thAya elina pelina kahe che, "DobrInuM vatana ane jIvana ghaNuM garIba hatuM, paNa enuM janmasthaLa AdhyAtmikatAthI samRddha hovAthI enAmAM bALapaNathI ja dharma ane adhyAtmanAM bIja ropAyelAM hatAM, AthI ja grAmajano mAne che ke DobrIne Apela eka eka pAI devaLanA kAryamAM ja vaparAvAnI che. e eka paNa pAI potAnA kharca mATe nahIM rAkhe." A aparigrahI phakIranI vAta ja judI che. Ama juo to tamane koI purANA jamAnAnA musAphara jevo lAge. enA hAthavaNATanAM vastro, lAMbA vALa, lAMbI dADhI ane eno Agavo poSAka - e badhI ja bAbato DobrInI pahecAna banI cUkI che. dararoja savAre vahelo UThIne e carcanAM bAraNAM khole che ane rAtre e ja niyamitatAthI baMdha kare che. babberiyAnI kaDakaDatI ThaMDIthI rakSaNa meLavavA mATe jhINA kALA koTamAM potAnI jAtane saMkorato A mAnavI Adhunika saMskRtinI koI sagavaDano upayoga karato nathI. enI nAnakaDI oraDImAM eka Tebala para paDela breDano TukaDo ane TAmeTAnI ekAda cIra ene AvatIkAle jIvita rAkhavA mATe pUratI hoya che. jamAnAnI raphatAra evI che ke have carcamAM janArAonI saMkhyA ochI thatI jAya che. keTalAka dezomAM to carcano bIjo upayoga thaI rahyo che evA jamAnAmAM A phakIra dayA ane zraddhAthI carcamAM jAya che. jANe koI prAcIna saMskRtino pratinidhi hoya evuM ene jotAM lAge che. eno hetu paNa bhaviSya mATe prajAmAM saMskAranuM siMcana karavAno che. e basamAM jAya tyAre basano DrAivara ene oLakhato hoya che. kyAreka enI TikiTanA paisA paNa mAgatA nathI. rAhadArIo A vRddhane ghaNI vAra AkhA divasanuM bhojana Ape che. unALAmAM to pAkA tarabUcathI tenuM divasanuM bhojana pUruM thaI jAya che. A bhUtapUrva sainika para umaranI asara thaI rahI che, paNa eno jusso eTalo ja che. e hajI thAkyA vinA potAnuM kAma karato rahe che. hA, eTaluM kharuM ke pahelAM ene sophiyA AvavA javA mATe koI kharca thato nahoto. 25 kilomITaranuM aMtara page cAlIne pavanavege pAra karato hato, paNa have basa ke TrAmamAM musApharI karavI paDe che, kAraNa ke have ene enA paga para bharoso rahyo nathI . 132 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI DobrI emanA para IzvaranA AzIrvAda Utare, te mATe bhIkha mAgavA nIkaLyo che. carcanA dvArA e dharmazraddhA para jora Ape che, to enI sAme anAtha bALakonA jatananI ciMtA kare che. Ane mATe eNe bhautika sukhano to tyAga karyo che, paNa ethIya vizeSa jIvanamAM koI jarUriyAta nahIM rAkhIne saghaLuM bIjAne samarpI dIdhuM che. tAjetaramAM DobrI sophiyAmAM Avela 'seinTa elekajhAMDara nevaskI' ane 'holI sevana seinTsa' carcamAM jovA maLe che. teNe beliviyAmAM AvelA 'seinTa sIrila eNnDa methoDiasa carcanA punaruddhAra mATeno phALo ugharAvavAnuM bIDuM jhaDapyuM che. sauthI vadhAremAM vadhAre phALo 25OO0 DaoNlara jeTalo teNe Apyo che. 'elekajhAMDara nevaskI ketheDrala'nA sekreTarI temanA mATe kahe che ke 'A e mANasa che je sadaguNone ane zAzvata jiMdagI mATeno phALo ekaTho karanAro eka saMta che. je vyakti kadAca sAntAklojhamAM na mAnato hoya, te A sajjana vRddha para zraddhA rAkhe che eTale ke tenI sajjanatAmAM teo zraddhA dharAve che.' AthI ja atyAra sudhImAM eNe pacAsa hajAra DaoNlara jeTalI 2 kema ekaThI karIne dAnamAM ApI che. DobrInI vizeSatA e che ke e koI enA tarapha tiraskAra dAkhave, koI kaTuvacano kahe topaNa enA caherA para koI aNagamo Avato nathI. eno bhalAInI bhIkha * 133

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vAMsaLI ane morapiccha bAyalovonA saMta tarIke DobI Dobreve siddhAMta che ke koI paNa paristhitine saheja paNa kleza ke kacavATa vinA svIkAravI, AthI je koI AhAra maLe te AnaMdabhera svIkAre che ane potAnA jIvananI paLepaLa bIjAnA mATe vAparavA cAhe che. ekaso varSanI umara to pAra karI, paNa chatAM kasaratathI kasAyelA enA zarIramAM eTalI ja skUrti ane taravarATa che. jIvananI aMtima ghaDI sudhI ene potAnAM 'ApavAnAM' mUlyone jALavI rAkhavA che ane tethI e kyAreya palAMThI vALIne besavA ke potAnI oraDInA palaMgamAM sUtAM sUtAM jIvananI vidAya jhaMkhato nathI. 16 jarmanInA bona zahe2nI nizALamAM bhaNatI ijhAbela jhAceMthe chAtI phATa rudana karatAM potAnAM mAtApitAne anulakSIne DaoNkTara kyulesisane vinaMtI karI, 'DaoNkTara, tame kahyuM tema huM motano mukAbalo karIza, paraMtu mArAM mAtApitAne samajAvo ke teo maherabAnI karIne A rIte bhAMgI paDe nahIM.' | DaoNkTara kyuolesise ijhAbelanA pitA hAnsa ane mAtA krisTanane hiMmata rAkhavA kahyuM. emaNe kahyuM hatuM ke, ijhA sAkromAno bhoga banI che ane kaeNnsaranA rogomAM A atyaMta jalada ane apAra pIDA ApanAruM bhayaMkara kaeNnsara che. tenI gAMTha zarIranA TiTyUjha sAthe joDAI jAya che ane tethI roga kUdake ne bhUsake vadhato jAya che. DaoNkTare nidAna karatI vakhate ema paNa kahyuM ke A jIvaleNa rogano dardI thoDA samayamAM ijhAbela jhAtha 134 * mATIe ghacAM mAnavI

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mRtyu pAme che. vyaktie eno sAmano karavAno ane camatkAranI AzA rAkhavAnI ! joke AmAM camatkAra bhAgye ja bane che. potAnI putrI ijhAbelanA roganuM nidAna sAMbhaLIne enAM mAtA ane pitA bhAMgI paDyAM. ijhAbele DaoNkTarone satya hakIkata jaNAvavA Agraha karyo, tyAre DokTaroe saghaLI vAta karI. chalochala AnaMdathI jIvatA A kuTuMba para ekasAthe AkhuM Abha tUTI paDyuM. hAnsa ane krisTana daMpatIne be putro ane eka putrI hatAM, paraMtu ijhAbelanI makkamatA joIne vipattimAM gherAyelA A parivAre nakkI karyuM ke game te thAya, topaNa motano makkama rahIne mukAbalo karavo che. jIvaleNa kensaranI zaraNAgati svIkAravI nathI. kaeNnsaranI TrITamenTa atyaMta kharcALa hatI, paraMtu jANe AkhuM kuTuMba enI sAme yuddhe caDyuM hoya tema mahenata karavA lAgyuM. baMne bhAIoe abhyAsa sivAyanA samayamAM je koI kAma maLe te karIne rakama ekaThI karavA mAMDI. emanAM 74 varSanAM dAdImAM barlinathI bona AvyAM ane e paNa kAma zodhIne mahenata karavA lAgyAM. ijhAbelane kaeNmotherApInI TrITamenTa ATheka divasa cAlI ane kaeNmotherApInI asara sArI vartAI. ema paNa jovA maLyuM ke gAMTha lagabhaga ogaLI rahI che. AkhA kuTuMbamAM eka moraco jItyAno AnaMda chavAI gayo. evAmAM pharI navo mukAbalo karavAnI ghaDI AvI. A TrITamenTanI ADaasara rUpe eka navA roge dekhA dIdhI. ijhAbelane lyukemiyAnI zarUAta thaI. enA lohImAM zvetakaNo ghaNA ochA thaI gayA. Ane pariNAme ijhAbelane khUba nabaLAI lAgatI hatI ane zvAsa levAmAM paNa rUMdhAmaNa thatI hatI. DaoN. kyubelise eka bIjA DaoNkTaranI salAha lIdhI. DaoN. karne paristhitinI gaMbhIratA pAmI gayA. TrITamenTa keTalI vedanAjanaka haze teno emane khyAla hato. emaNe ijhAbelane kahyuM, 'beTA, makkama raheje. gabharAIza nahIM." ijhAbele kahyuM, "sAheba, huM makkama chuM. saheje ciMtA karazo nahIM.' evAmAM krisTamasanA AnaMdabharyA divaso AvyA. ijhAbelane thoDuM sAruM lAgatuM hatuM. zarIramAM zaktisaMcAra jaNAto hato. bhojananI icchA paNa thavA lAgI. ijhAbelane haoNspiTalamAMthI mukti ApavAmAM AvI. ijhAbelanI muktine kuTuMbe mahotsavamAM pheravI dIdhI. ijhAbele ghera AvI tyAre enAM dAdImA ane enA baMne bAMdhavoe evuM bhAvabhInuM svAgata karyuM. krisTamasano samaya hato. pappA hAnse krisTamasa TrI banAvyuM. bhAIoe te zaNagAryuM ane ijhAbele mINabattIo paTAvatAM sarvatra AnaMda vyApI rahyo. A samaye carcano ghaMTArava sAMbhaLI ijhAbele kahyuM, 'A kadAca mAre mATe che.' krisTamasanI rajA mANIne naveka divasa bAda ijhAbele haoNspiTalamAM pAchI AvI. pacIseka divasa sAruM rahyuM. DaoNkTarone ema paNa lAgatuM ke kadAca camatkAra banaze. paraMtu 29mI jAnyuArIe ijhAbelano DAbo paga sAva aTakI gayo. athAga prayatna karavA chatAM te pagane khaseDI zakI nahIM. DaoNkTara karna bolI UThyA, 'oha mAryA ThAra ! have bhAre muzkelI.' DaoNkTaroe navI TrITamenTa nakkI karatAM pahelAM kensara aMgenAM tamAma pustako vAMcI joyAM. anya DaoNkTaro sAthe TrITamenTanI carcA karI. lAMbI carcAne aMte emaNe ghaNI yAtanAjanaka TrITamenTa ApavAnuM nakkI karyuM. ijhAbela adhavaccethI bhAMgI paDI. enI dhArI asara thaI nahIM. A samaye ijhAbele potAnI nizALanI sakhI DaoNrikAne patra lakhyo, 'have mArAthI vedanA sahana thatI nathI. huM bahu ja du:khI thaI gaI chuM. mota mAguM chuM.' ijhAbelanI sthiti joI enA kuTuMbIjanoe paNa hiMmata gumAvavA mAMDI. evAmAM A haoNspiTalamAM keneDAmAM rahetAM zrI ane zrImatI mArTina sAthe ijhAbelanA kuTuMbIjanonI mulAkAta thaI. teo A haoNspiTalamAM temanA snehInA khabaraaMtara pUchavA AvyA hatA. emaNe ijhAbelanI vAta sAMbhaLI ane zrImatI mArTina ijhAbelanI sAravAra kharcane mATe mahenata karavA lAgyAM. A mArTina daMpatIe bhAratanA banArasamAM bAreka varSa pasAra karyA hatAM. zrImatI mArTina roja be kalAka besIne ijhAbelane jAtajAtanI vArtAo kahetI. eNe 136 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI vAMsaLI ane morapiccha * 137

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DaoNkTaroe paNa kahyuM ke have eno jIvanadIpa bujhAvAnI taiyArImAM che. enI aMtima paLe parivArajano ane mArTina daMpatI enA palaMganI AsapAsa UbhAM rahetAM tyAre ijhAbele emanI sAme joIne kahyuM, 'are, AvuM zogiyuM moTuM karIne kema UbhA cho mArI sAme ? mArI AMkha mIMcAze pachI huM maravAnI nathI. mAruM mRtyu marI jaze huM nahIM, huM pAchI AvIza.' | ijhAbela mRtyu pAmI tyAre enA takiyA nIcethI be vastuo maLI AvI. eka pavitra bAibalanuM pustaka ane bIjI kotarakAmavALI nAnakaDI lAkaDAnI DabI hatI. kuTuMbIoe DabI udhADI to emAM moranuM pIMchuM hatuM. 'inDiyAnA zrIkRSNa'nI vArtA kahI. ijhAbelane AmAM rasa paDavA lAgyo. potAnI TrITamenTa daramiyAna ghaNI vAra ijhAbela kaMTALo AvavAnI vAta karatI tyAre DaoNkTare ene saMgIta sAMbhaLavAnuM sUcana karyuM. A chokarIe ekAeka ja DaoNkTarane kahyuM, 'mArAthI kyUTa (vAMsaLI) vagADAya ?' DaoNkTara karnee hasatAM hasatAM kahyuM ke AvI rIte phUMka mAratAM tArAM phephasAMne zrama paDe. Ama chatAM tAre thoDuM huM phre karavuM hoya to kara. ijhAbelanA pitAe ene eka vAMsaLI lAvI ApI. ijhAbelanI sAravAra cAlatI hatI. DaoNkTaro tanatoDa prayatna karatA hatA. ghaDIkamAM tabiyata sArI hoya to ghaDImAM taddana bagaDI jatI, paraMtu A samaye ijhAbelamAM eka parivartana jovA maLyuM. enI vedanA jANe adRzya thaI gaI hoya tema enA mukha para apAra zAMtinA bhAva hatA, enI vANImAM svasthatA ane vartanamAM AnaMdano sAkSAtkAra hato. zrImatI mArTina ijhAbelane pavitra krosa Apyo tyAre ijhAbele ene kAnamAM potAnI eka bIjI mAgaNI karI. eNe kahyuM ke, 'prayatna karIne jarUra huM tane e bheTa ApIza.' dasa divasa pachI mArTina kotarakAmavALI lAkaDAnI DabbImAM te bheTa laIne AvyAM. potAnA nAnA bhAI maeNthiyAsanI varSagAMThanI ujavaNI mATe ijhAbele DaoNkTarane kahyuM, 'mAre ghera jaIne bhAInI varSagAMThanI ujavaNImAM bhAga levo DaoNkTaroe savArathI sAMja sudhI javAnI chUTa ApI. vaLI ijhAbele kahyuM ke e embulansamAMthI UtarIne hIlacaeNranI sahAya vinA jAte cAlIne gharamAM jaze. baMne DaoNkTaroe ekabIjA sAme sUcaka dRSTie joyuM ane saMketa karyo ke atyAre ApaNe hA pADavI, paNa hakIkatamAM e cAlI zake evI sthitimAM nathI. varSagAMThanA divase ijhAbela aMbyulansamAMthI UtarI, cAlavAnI jIda karI, paga dhrujatA hovA chatAM dhIme dhIme bAraNAM sudhI AvI ane nAnA bhAIne bheTI paDI. rAtre e haoNspiTalamAM pAchI pharI tyAre pharI pAchuM mota sAmenuM yuddha zarU thayuM. 138 * mATIe ghaDacAM mAnavI vAMsaLI ane morapiccha * 139

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17 beranADeTa reMDala kensarano zikAra ke kensaranA vijetA satata traNa-traNa varSa sudhI nAnI-moTI bImArInI phariyAdathI parezAna beranADeTa reMDala akaLAI UThI. eka bImArI maTe, tyAM bIjI Asana jamAvIne beThI ja hoya. ethI eNe potAnA phaeNmilIDaoNkTarane phariyAda karI ke nAnImoTI takalIphathI e parezAna thaI rahI che. enA zarIra para kAnanI pAse eka gAMTha paNa satata sUjhelI rahe che. beranADeTanI A vAta sAMbhaLIne DaoNkTara pArAvAra Azcarya pAmyA. chellAM traNa varSathI beranADeTanI sAravAra karatA hovA chatAM emane A gAMThano kema ko khyAla ja na Avyo ! beranADeTe kahyuM ke eNe agAu emane A vAta karI hatI. phaeNmilIDaoNkTare chellAM traNa varSanI beranADeTanI meDikala phAIla maMgAvI ane joyuM to emAM kAnanI nIce thayelI gAMThanI noMdha emaNe svahaste ja lakhI hatI ! paNa kamanasIbe e tarapha emaNe vizeSa lakSa ApyuM nahotuM. e samaye A ja phaeNmilIDaoNkTare kahyuM hatuM ke A evI koI mahattvanI ke gaMbhIra zArIrika bAbata nathI. A gAMTha to thoDA vakhatamAM ogaLI jaze. DaoNkTara gAMThane badale beranADeTanI nAnI-moTI takalIpho para najara TheravI ane traNeka varSa sudhI ene sAravAra ApI. beranADeTanI zArIrika hAlatamAM koI noMdhapAtra sudhAro thato nahoto. emAM ekAeka enA hAtha ane pagamAM satata khaMjavALa AvavA lAgI. DaoNkTare beranADeTane tenI oNphise AvavA kahyuM. e divase beranATanI zArIrika tapAsa thaI. satata sUjhelI gAMTha e kaeNnsaranI gAMTha hatI ane thoDA samayamAM kaeNnsaranI e glaeNnDa para sarjarI karavAmAM AvI. beranADeTanI chAtImAM ane enA nAkanI pAchaLanA bhAgamAM paNa 'Tyumara' jovA maLI. DaoNkTaroe 'limphomA' hovAnuM nidAna karyuM. limphomA dharAvanAra cAlIsa TakA dardInI vadhumAM vadhu pAMca varSa sudhI ja jIvAdorI hoya che. kaeNnsaranI gaMbhIra bImArIne kAraNe beranADeTane mAthe ekasAthe AkhuM AkAza tUTI paDyuM. e khUba mUMjhAI gaI. ene kazuM sUjhatuM nahotuM ane manamAM vAraMvAra e savAla jAgato hato ke "have huM zuM karI zakIza ?" "zuM mArA AyuSyano aMta AvI gayo ?" "have mAre jIvana vedanAmaya ane kAramI pIDAomAM ja vitAvavAnuM raheze ?" vyAdhithI gherAyelI beranADeTa samatola mAnasa dharAvatI hatI. AvI paristhitimAM Avo roga thAya tyAre dardI anya loko tarapha kaTutA dharAvavA lAge che. eno svabhAva vAtavAtamAM cIDiyo banI jAya che. AvI sthiti mATe Izvarane doSI gaNI enA para phiTakAra varasAve che. ja keTalAka Avo roga thatAM potAnI jAtane samAjathI aLagI rAkhIne ataDA banIne jIvatA hoya che. A roga zarIramAM rahevAne badale enA mana para savAra thaI jAya che. rAta-divasa enA ja vicAro Ave. jIvananA pratyeka kAryanA kendramAM rogajanita nirAzA palAMThI lagAvIne besI jAya. beranADeTane AvAM keTalAMya kaeNnsaranAM dardIono paricaya hato. eNe e paNa joyuM hatuM ke ghaNAM dardIo A roganA zaraNe jaIne nirAzA ane niSkriyatAthI mRtyu tarapha svayameva gati karatA hatA. kaeNnsarano zikAra ke kaeNnsaranA vijetA ? * 141

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beranADeTa eno vicAra karavA lAgI ke e pote kaI rIte A rogano pratyuttara ApavA cAhe che ? A darda sAtheno saMbaMdha kaI rIte nibhAvavA cAhe che ? bIjAnI mAphaka ene vaza thavA mAge che, ke paravaza banavAne badale ene samajIne paDakAravA cAhe che ? enA mananA UMDANamAM kaeNmilIDaoNkTaranA vilaMbathI thayelA nidAnanI vAta paNa paDI hatI. eka khoTo nirNaya kevI moTI Aphata UbhI kare che eno beranADeTane sAkSAt anubhava hato. pariNAme beranArDaTe nakkI karyuM ke have potAnI jiMdagI vizenA ane vizeSa to potAnI sAravAra vizenA nirNayo e svayaM leze. kensara jevA roga vize jAte abhyAsa karIne nirNaya levo e ghaNI lAMbI, ghaNo samaya mAganArI kaparI bAbata hatI, paraMtu potAnI sAravAra aMge beranADeTe nirNaya levAnA potAnA 'nirNayane koI paNa saMjogomAM vaLagI rahevAnuM nakkI karyuM." beranApheTe potAnI bImArIno abhyAsa karavA mAMDyo. A bImArI aMge lakhAyelAM pustako vAMcavA lAgI, judI judI vyaktinA anubhavono abhyAsa karyo. hajI prayoganA svarUpamAM thaI rahelI klinikala TrAyalano eNe abhyAsa karyo. e pachI eNe judI judI kemikala therApIno abhyAsa karyo. A abhyAsamAM davAnI ADaasaranI paNa eNe pUrI jANakArI meLavI ane pachI potAnA para enI ajamAyaza karavA lAgI. eNe aMkolaoNjisTa sAthe kAma karanArI ane kaeNnsaranA dardIonI sAravAra karanArI narsanI mulAkAta lIdhI, eno paNa sAtha meLavyo. beranATe amerikana kaeNnsara sosAyaTIno saMparka sAdhyo ane kensara sosAyaTImAM prakAzita kareluM sAhitya meLavyuM. pariNAma e AvyuM ke beranADeTanI sarjarI thaI ane e pachI eNe reDiyezana TrITamenTa lIdhI. enI vaccenA pakhavADiyAmAM to beranADeTa pote potAnI sAravAra vize nirNayo karatI thaI gaI. beranADeTane lAgyuM ke vyakti pote ja potAnI sAravAranI pasaMdagI kare ane te paNa darda aMgenI pUrI jANakArI meLavIne, to ene mATe sAravAranI pIDA ane e kaparo samaya pasAra karavo saraLa bane che. AnuM kAraNa e ke eNe pote A prakAranI TrITamenTanI pasaMdagI karelI hoya che ! beranADeTa nirNaya karatAM pUrve lAMbI vicAraNA karatI hatI. potAnI jAtane prazno pUchatI hatI, enA uttaro paNa pustakonA abhyAsa ane niSNAtonA mArgadarzana pachI e jAte meLavatI hatI. kaeNnsaranI sAravAra levAnI hoya tyAre e vicAratI ke, "DaoNkTaranI A sAravArano koI vikalpa che kharo ? ane jo vikalpa hoya to e vikalpane apanAvavA jatAM kayAM pariNAmo Ave ?" beranADeTanI A paddhati pahelAM DaoNkTarone anukULa AvI nahIM. kyAreka enI lAMbI praznAvali DaoNkTarone kaMTALAjanaka lAgatI hatI, paraMtu samaya jatAM ema banyuM ke DaoNkTaro ene enI sAravAra aMge vigate samajAvatA hatA. beranADeTanI jANakArIthI AnaMdita thatA ane pachI ene ja eno aMtima nirNaya levAnuM kahetA hatA. beranADeTa sAme eka prazna Ubho thayo ke zuM eka varSa sudhI kazIya sAravAra vinA rahevuM ane pachI sarjarIthI thayelo bagADa dUra karavo ? eNe e vicAryuM ke ema karavAne badale hAla reDiyezana levuM ane kaeNmotherApIno korsa karavo. A rIte eNe judA judA vikalponI svayaM khoja AdarI ane e pramANe DaoNkTaranI salAha mujaba TrITamenTa goThavatI rahI. A kensaranA darda ane enA UMDA abhyAse beranADeTane eka vastu zIkhavI ke jiMdagImAM kaThaNa ane kaparA nirNayo letAM acakAvuM joIe nahIM. vakhata Ave AvA kaparA nirNaya jarUrI hoya che. ene e paNa khyAla Avyo ke ApaNe ApaNI jAta vize dhArIe chIe enA karatAM ghaNA vadhu makkama ane manobaLayukta hoIe chIe. kaeNnsara vizenAM pustakono abhyAsa karatAM karatAM beranADeTane DaoN. barna siMgalanAM pustako ane vIDiyo-Tepa maLyAM. A barnI siMgale amerikAmAM eksepzanala kaeNnsara pezanTa" nAmanA maMDaLanI sthApanA karI hatI. DaoN. barna siMgale e joyuM ke potAnI TrITamenTa vizenA nirNayamAM bhAga lenArAM dardIo kaeNnsarano zikAra ke kensaranA vijetA ? * 143 142 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI

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vadhu lAMbo vakhata jIvyAM hatAM. evAmAM beranAsDeTane eka bIjuM pustaka maLyuM. enuM nAma hatuM, "lava, meDisIna eNnDa mirekalsa ." A pustakamAM DaoN. barnI siMgele darzAvyuM ke tame svastha hatA tyAre tamane je kAma karavAnI icchA hovA chatAM e kAma karavAnI hiMmata karatA nahotA. tame je karavA varSothI cAhatA hatA, paNa AsapAsanI sAmAjika javAbadArIne kAraNe tamane evI nirAMta maLatI nahotI te kAma karavAnI have tamane mokaLAza maLaze. beranADeTe A vicAra pakaDI lIdho. eNe vicArI lIdhuM ke A bImArI pahelAM e koI paNa kAma karavAnI koIne nA pADavAnI hiMmata karI zakatI nahotI. AthI e game teTalI thAkI gaI hoya, kaMTALI gaI hoya topaNa tana ane mana baMnethI taNAIne kAma karatI hatI. agAu evAM ghaNAM kAma karatI hatI, jemAM rasa nahoto paraMtu lokadRSTie e kAma karavuM paDatuM. e ema mAnatI ke bIjA loko enA kAmane pasaMda kare te mahattvanuM che. kaeNnsaranI bImArIe beranADeTanuM jIvana badalI nAkhyuM. Ane kAraNe enI varSothI haiyAmAM saMgharAyelI icchAo saMtoSAvA lAgI. pahelAM e bIjAnI dRSTie jIvana gujAratI hatI. moTA bhAganI vyaktio Ameya 'bIjAne kema lAgIza' e dRSTie pote jIvatI hoya che. A rogane kAraNe aNagamatAM kAmo ke binajarUrI pravRttinI AsAnIthI nA pADI zake tevI paristhiti sarjAI. pariNAme jIvanamAM ghaNAM aNagamatAM kAma ochAM thaI gayAM. gamatAM kAmano gulAla jIvanamAM UDavA lAgyo. bALapaNathI ene puSkaLa vAMcanaprema hato. pustakonI keda enI pasaMdagInI duniyA hatI. ene atyAra sudhI vAMcavAnuM khUba mana thatuM ane sAthosAtha evo UMDo vasavaso raheto ke potAno vAMcanaprema tRpta karavAnI pUrI anukULatA maLatI nathI. have e potAno vAMcanazokha pUro karavA mATe avakAza meLavI zakatI hatI. potAnAM priya pustakonI duniyAmAM jIvavA ane ghUmavA lAgI. A kaeNnsare eka moTo pATha zIkhavyo ke potAnI jAtane vadhu ne vadhu cAho. Aja sudhI kyAreya beranADeTane AvI taka maLI nahotI. have e potAnI jAtano, potAnA jIvanano ane potAnA manane khuza karanArI AnaMdadAyaka bAbatono ja vicAra karavA lAgI. ne 144 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI beranADeTanI jIvanadRSTimAM parivartana AvyuM. ene lAgyuM ke jo tame tamArI copAsa sAruM jotA hazo, anyanuM bhaluM vicAratA hazo ke kalyANadRSTi rAkhatA hazo to tamane badhuM sAruM ja maLaze. tame sArA vicAro karatA hazo to copAsathI uttama vicAro tamane maLI raheze. jo tame sArAM kAryo karazo to enA pratidhvani rUpe anyanAM sArAM kAryono tamane anubhava thato raheze. beranADeTa 'Dela kAranegI pablika spIkiMga eNnDa hyumana rilezansa' nAmanA abhyAsakramamAM joDAI. A abhyAsakramamAM joDAnArI pratyeka vyaktie eka siddhAMta svIkAravAno raheto. vaLI e svIkRta siddhAMta potAnA jIvanamAM pratyakSapaNe AcaraNamAM mUkIne enuM amalIkaraNa karavAnuM rahetuM. beranADeTe siddhAMta svIkAryo ke koInI TIkA karavI nahIM, koInI niMdA karavI nahIM ane koI bAbatanI phariyAda karavI nahIM. pariNAme evuM banyuM ke beranADeTane badhuM ja sAruM dekhAvA lAgyuM. AsapAsanI AkhI sRSTi vize enA cittamAM satata umadA ane uttama vicAra AvavA lAgyA. bIjI vyaktinA prema ane snehano ene manabhara anubhava thavA lAgyo. mAnavahRdayanI suMdaratA oLakhAvA lAgI. enuM hRdaya praphullita rahevA lAgyuM. AnA pariNAme rAtre jyAre adazya avakAzayAnanI mAphaka beranADeTanA zarIramAM kaeNnsaranA dardanI kALI pIDA jAgatI tyAre ene koI apUrva zAMtino ane AtmavizvAsano anubhava thato. mAnavajIvanamAM karuNA keTalI mahAna che ane karuNAno sparza kevo daivI che eno beranADeTane sAkSAtkAra thayo. evAmAM oNkTobaranA madhyabhAgamAM kaeNnsaranI bImArInA kAraNe beranADeTanA vALa UtarI gayA. eka to kAramI ThaMDI ane mAthA para eke vALa na maLe. kevo kadarUpo dekhAva ! paNa beranADeTa ema mUMjhAya tevI nahotI. dehanuM kadarUpApaNuM mananI suMdaratAthI dUra karavA cAhatI hatI. eNe potAnA vyaktitva ane kapaDAMne anurUpa ane zobhe evI mAthA para paheravAnI 'kaeNpa' zodhI kADhI. bejhabaoNlanA khelADIo paheratA hoya evI kaMpa e paheravA lAgI. vaLI ene AnaMda e thayo ke keTalAya judA judA raMganI AvI 'kaMpa' maLatI hatI, tethI potAnA manapasaMda raMgonI 'kaeNpa' paheravAnI ene mokaLAza maLI. thoDA samaye pharI mAthA para vALa UgyA, paNa beranADeTe pelI kaeNpa paheravAnI cAlu ja kaeNnsarano zikAra ke kaeNnsaranA vijetA ? * 145

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rAkhI, 'kaMpa" enA damAmadAra vyaktitvano eka aMza banI rahI. | pahelI vAra eNe bejhabola kaeNpa paherI tyAre koIke majAka paNa karI hatI, beranADeTa AvI majAka sahana karavA jeTalI daDha saMkalpa hatI, paNa koI enA tarapha dayAmaNI dRSTie jue te mATe saheje taiyAra nahotI. dareka paristhitimAM hasatA raho." e beranADaTano siddhAMta hato. hakIkatamAM beranADeTane joIne bIjA loko sAhasa ane hiMmata anubhavavA lAgyA. kensaranI bImArIne kAraNe beranADeTe vicAra karyo ke e have vadhu utsAha ane jozabhera jIvavA cAhe che. enA jIvananI eka tamannA e hatI ke apUrNa rahelo kaoNlejano abhyAsa pUro karavo. A abhyAsa mATe beranADe! vadhu abhyAsa mATe maLatI lona lIdhI. kaoNlejamAM phulaTAima vidyArthI tarIke bhaNavA lAgI. sAthosAtha phulaTAima kAma paNa karavA lAgI. cauda mahinAnA abhyAsa daramiyAna ene mAtra eka ja varga choDavo paDyo ! beranADeTa snAtaka banI, enA jIvananI eka mahecchA AsAnIthI paripUrNa thaI. e pachI ATheka mahinAno ArAma laIne eNe anusnAtakanI padavI mATe abhyAsa zarU karyo. e kensaranI sAme laDatI hatI e enA laDAyaka khamIre ja sAbita karI batAvyuM ke e dhAre te karI zake tema che. e pachI cAreka varSa sudhI beranADe. kAunselara tarIke svayaMsevA ApI. beranADeTa pAse kensaranI bImArImAMthI maLelI zakti hatI. je o kaeNnsaranI bImArInI TrITamenTano prAraMbha karatA hatA emane bairanADeTa potAnI e zaktino lAbha ApavA lAgI. traNeka varSa sudhI beranADeTe kaeNnsaranA roganA salAhakAra tarIke sevAo ApI. eka divasa beranADeTane enA jevI ja bImArI dharAvatI vyaktine salAha ApavAmAM AvyuM ane e vyakti te bIjI koI nahIM, kiMtu jekalina keneDI nAsIsa hatI. zrImatI nAsIsano kaI rIte saMparka sAdhavo tenI vigatavAra mAhitI ApavAmAM AvI. A paristhitie beranADeTane samajAyuM ke A jagatamAM sahu koI sarakhAM che. A vyApaka vizvamAM game tevI amIra ke sAmAnya vyaktimAM paNa Izvare jijIviSA mUkelI che. naeNzanala kaeNnsara sarvAivarsa De"nI ujavaNImAM beranAjheTe bhAga lIdho. enA kaeNnsaranA dardane sADAcAra varSa pUrNa thayAM hatAM. eNe potAnA kensara vizenA anubhavonI anya sahu sAthe vaheMcaNI karI. beranAjheTe anubhavyuM ke sauthI mahattvanI bAbata e che ke kensarane paDakAra mAnanArA judI rIte jIve che ane kensarane abhizApa mAnanArA ene judI rIte jue che. Ama sauthI mahattvano bheda tame kensaranA zikAra cho ke tame kaeNnsaranA vijetA cho te che. Aje beranADeTa vicAre che ke AkarA zikSaka kensare emane jIvanamAM keTaluM badhuM zIkhavyuM ! teo zIkhyAM ke sAravAranI samajadArIthI pasaMdagI karo, kaparA nirNaya letAM acakAzo nahIM. badhe ja vidhAyaka valaNa rAkhIne zubha jovuM. dareka paristhitimAM hasatA raho. joza ane utsAhathI jIvo ane mAno ke ApaNe badhA ja eka chIe. ema mAno nahIM ke "Izvara kyAMya nathI", paNa ema vicAro ke "Izvara ahIM ja che". 146 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI kensarano zikAra ke kensaranA vijetA ? * 147

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aMdhane azakya ? jiMdagI jIvanArI A nArI nahotI. enI pAse A ajaMpo hato, paNa sAthe aMtaranuM khamIra paNa hatuM. e dRDhapaNe mAnatI ke vyakti aMdha hoya, eno artha e nathI ke enA A jagatanA koI anubhavathI bAkAta rahevuM paDe. e dhAre to duniyAnA saghaLA anubhavo pAmI zake che. jiMdagIe soniyA sAthe sogaThAbAjI khelavAmAM kazuM bAkI rAkhyuM na hatuM. e AMkhanA evA roga sAthe janmI hatI ke jeno koI upacAra nahoto. e mAMDa mAMDa mAtra zveta ane zyAma raMga ja jhAMkhA jhAMkhA joI zakatI hatI ane emAMya vIsa varSanI uMmare pahoMcI, tyAre to e saMpUrNapaNe aMdha banI gaI. AraMbhanA e divasomAM soniyA hatAza banIne besI rahetI. manomana vicAratI paNa kharI ke kone AdhAre A jiMdagI vitAvIza ? athavA to parAvalaMbI jIvana jIvavAno artha zo ? eka vAra to hatAzA ane akaLAmaNamAM eNe AtmahatyA karavAno prayAsa paNa karyo, paraMtu samaya jatAM ene samajAyuM ke jIvana jevuM che, tevuM svIkAravuM temAM ja AnaMda che ane jIvana sAmenA avarodhone oLaMgavA, emAM ja kharuM khamIra che. AthI eNe potAnI jiMdagI vadhu kAryakSama bane evo to prayatna karyo ja, paNa enI sAthosAtha e jiMdagI dvArA paropakAra karavAnI tamannA paNa dilamAM dhabakatI rAkhI. koI jyAre ene ema kahe ke A ene mATe zakya nathI, tyAre e manathI nakkI karatI ke e mAre mATe to jarUra zakya banaze. jIvanamAMthI azakyanI e bAdabAkI karavA lAgI. bALapaNathI enA manamAM eka svapna hatuM ane te evuM ke vimAnamAM khUba UMce UMce javuM ane pachI khUba UMcAIethI AkAzamAMthI kUdako lagAvavo. moTAbhAganA lokone to AvA perAzUTa jampano vicAra ja bhayajanaka lAge, kAraNa eTale ke eTale UMcethI kUdako lagAvavA mATe aDaga sAhasavRtti joIe. vaLI e pachI pRthvI para salAmata rIte UtaravAnI kaLA-AvaData joIe. soniyA hArTa A svapna laIne jIvatI hatI. e eDinabargamAM potAnA ghara pAsethI eka khAnagI kaMpanImAM nokarI karatI hatI. bevarlI ane keka e enAM be saMtAno sAthe AnaMdabhera jIvatI hatI ane krophTana e teno mArgadarzaka kUtaro hato. vaya vadhatI jatI hatI, paNa enI sAthe AkAzamAMthI kUdako lagAvavAnA aMdhane azakya ? * 149 jiMdagI ghaDAya che paDakAra ane puruSArthathI ! jIvananA paDakAra sAme pramAdathI paga vALIne besI rahenAra saMjogono gulAma bane che. AvA paDakArono hasate mukhe mukAbalo karanAra saMjogono mAlika thAya che. ghaNIvAra vyakti paristhitithI ja eTalI badhI muMjhAI jAya che ke potAne niHsahAya ane nirAdhAra mAne che. jIvanamAM koI vikalAMgatA Ave eTale e mAnI bese che ke enuM AkhuM jIvana vyathA, lAcArI ane viSAdathI bhareluM raheze. ene oziyALA banIne jIvavuM paDaze. ene jiMdagI mATe bIjAno AdhAra joIze, ene potAnI jiMdagI boja lAge che. aMdha soniyAne e sAMbhaLIne bhAre ajaMpo thato ke aMdhane mATe koI bahArI prakAza ke koI bAhya jagata nathI, paraMtu e ajaMpAne vyagratA ane viSAdamAM DubADIne 18 soniyA hArTa

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svapnane siddha karavAnI icchA tIvra banatI jatI hatI. ene mATe A atyaMta jokhamI bAbata hatI, kAraNa ke dasa hajAra phUTanI UMcAIethI gabaDavA sivAya bIjuM kaMI karI zake tema na hatI. mRtyu ane enI vacce phakta eka ja mAnavI hato ane enuM nAma hatuM perAsyuTa insTrakTara mAika keTsa. A mAika kesane barAbara cIpakI rahIne dharatI para UtaravAnuM hatuM. soniyAe jyAre potAno vicAra mitrone kahyo, tyAre mitroe kahyuM ke Ameya A sAhasa bhayajanaka che. emAMya aMdha vyakti mATe to atizaya bhayajanaka gaNAya. bIjuM koI saraLa sAhasa kara, paNa A vicArane to tilAMjali ApI de. niSNAtoe kahyuM ke jo te AkAzamAMthI UtarIne dharatIne sparza karavAmAM saheja paNa khoTuM utarANa kare, to enI karoDarajjune ghaNI gaMbhIra IjA thAya. jIvana AkhuM paravaza ane pathArIvaza banI rahe. AnuM kAraNa e hatuM ke AkAzamAMthI UtaratI vakhate jamIna sudhInA aMtaranI kalpanA karavA mATe soniyA samartha nahotI. vaLI AvA AkAzI kUdakA mATe soniyAe koI vizeSa taiyArI karI nahotI. eNe A mATenI koI paddhatisara tAlIma paNa lIdhI nahotI. mAtra insTrakTara mAike ene satata preraNA ApI ane eTaluM ja kahyuM hatuM ke A AkAzI kUdakA daramiyAna 'rileksa' raheje ! jyAre A kUdako lagAvavAnuM nakkI thayuM, tyAre vimAnamAM pravezatI vakhate soniyAe pArAvAra romAMca anubhavyo. mitroe ene ghaNI salAha ApI hatI ke vimAna-chatrI dvArA AkAzamAMthI jhaMpalAvavAnuM kArya atyaMta jokhamI ane bhayajanaka che, paNa soniyA A kArya karIne e siddha karavA mAgatI hatI ke aMdha lokone paNa joI zakatA mAnavI jeTalI ja taka maLavI joIe. tene mATe A eka mahAna paDakAra hato ane sAthosAtha svapna-siddhino romAMca AnaMda hato. te khumArIthI kahetI ke aMdha joI zakatA nathI, tene kAraNe teone jagatanA koI paNa anubhavathI bAkAta rAkhavAnI jarUra nathI. soniyA vimAnamAM dAkhala thaI. enI sAthe bIjI traNa aMdha vyaktio paNa enA insTrakTara sAthe jiMdagIno A sAhasabharyo anubhava meLavavA AvI hatI. skoTalenDanA glena rojasa havAI mathaka para A ghaTanAe AkAra 150 * mATIe ghaDyAM mAnavI lIdho, enuM vimAna bhramaNa kakSAnI samakakSa thayuM ke uSNatAmAna ghaTavA lAgyuM. ThaMDI lAgavA mAMDI, pavanano atyaMta bhayAvaha avAja Avato hato, kyAreka to e pavananA susavATAnA avAjane kAraNe mAike ane bIjA insTrakTarone khUba moTethI vAta karavI paDatI hatI. jevuM vimAna dasa hajAra phUTanI UMcAIe AvyuM ke soniyAne vimAnanuM bAraNuM kholavAno avAja saMbhaLAyo. AkAzI kUdakA mATe e mAikanI sAthe bAraNA tarapha gaI. mAike ene protsAhananA zabdo kahyA ane pachI soniyA aMtima hukamanI rAha jovA lAgI. jIvasaTosaTanI paLa AvI cUkI hatI. eka bAju manamAM svapnane sAkAra thavAnI paLa hatI, to bIjI bAju mRtyunI sAva samIpa laI jAya, tevI ghaDI hatI. A samaye soniyA thoDI kSaNo khacakAI gaI. e gabharAI gaI. enA hRdayanA dhabakArA vadhI gayA hatA. ThaMDuM vAtAvaraNa hovA chatAM parasevo thaI gayo. mAnasapaTa para enAM be saMtAno dekhAvA lAgyAM. vaLI nIce enI AturatApUrvaka rAha jotAM kuTuMbIjano ane mitronuM smaraNa thayuM. manamAM punaH saMkalpanuM smaraNa karyuM. aMdhane kazuM azakya nathI. AthI eka jozabharyA avAja sAthe eNe AkAzamAMthI nIce jhaMpalAvyuM ane pachI keTalIka sekanDo sudhI UMdhA mAthe zIrSAlana karatAM karatAM nIce Utaryo. soniyA khUba jhaDapathI gulAMTo para gulAMTo khAtI hatI. eNe insTrakTara mAikane kazuMka kahevA prayatna karyo, paNa enuM mukha UghaDyuM ja nahIM. evAmAM acAnaka havAI chatrI khUlavAno avAja saMbhaLAyo ane soniyAne rAhata thaI. enA zarIre bAMdhavAmAM AvelI dorI kheMcAIne TAiTa thaI. AkAzamAM je gulAMTa lagAvatI hatI e aTakI gaI ane dhIme dhIme soniyA nIce UtaravA lAgI. jANe pote koI svapnamAM sarakatI hoya evo anubhava thavA lAgyo. A samaye insTrakTara mAika pote je kaMI joto hato, tenuM varNana soniyAne saMbhaLAvato hato. e varNanathI soniyAne eno jANe sAkSAt anubhava thavA lAgyo. e svayaM A badhuM nIrakhI rahI che. vacce kyAMka cakarAve caDyA, paNa dhIre dhIre jamInanI najIka AvyA. A samaye soniyAe mAikane kahyuM ke enuM kuTuMba jamIna parathI enA tarapha hAtha halAvI rahyuM che. enA javAbamAM soniyAe aMgUThAthI nizAnI aMdhane azakya ? * 151

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batAvI ane pachI acAnake ja dharatIno sparza thayo. kevo romAMcakArI sparza! soniyA ghUMTaNa para paDI gaI ane enA kuTuMbIjano cAre bAju vIMTaLAI vaLyAM ane pUchavA lAgyA ke e svastha to che ne ? hakIkatamAM perAzUTathI karelo eno havAI kUdako e saMpUrNa utarANa hatuM. eNe sAbita karI ApyuM ke AkAzI kUdakA mATe e pUrI zaktimAna hatI. enA pitA AvIne soniyAne vaLagI paDyA. AnuM kAraNa e hatuM ke enA AkAzI kUdakA aMge sauthI vadhu virodha vahAlasoyA pitAe karyo hato. emane bhaya hato ke potAnI A putrIne koI gaMbhIra IjA thaze, to koNa ene jALavaze ? emaNe soniyAne khUba khUba abhinaMdana ApyAM ane kahyuM ke tenI AvI siddhi mATe teo garva anubhave che. cummAlIsa varSanI soniyAnuM svapna siddha thayuM. vaLI sAhasabharyA A AkAzI kUdakA dvArA soniyA ane temanA mitroe dAna rUpe je rakama meLavI hatI, te skoTalaeNnDanA phAIlamAM AvelA elvina hAusa mATe ApavAmAM AvyA, o elvina hAusa te aMdha vyaktio mATe nirmANa pAmatuM vasavATanuM eka kendra hatuM. e pachI soniyAe bIjAM keTalAMya svapna sevyAM. eNe maMca para badhI ja uMmaranAM aMdhajano dvArA kAryakramanuM Ayojana karavAnuM nakkI karyuM. emAMthI je 2kama maLatI te aMdhajanonA kalyANa kAryane mATe ApI detI. soniyAnA AkAzI kUdakA aMge enI soLa varSanI putrI bevarlIe kahyuM, * eka vakhata mammI je nakkI kare che, tene koI avarodha naDato nathI. amArA virodha chatAM eNe havAI chatrI sAthe kUdavAno nirNaya karyo ane ame joyuM ke e pachI e atyaMta prasanna hatI.' e paNa hakIkata che ke A havAI kUdakAthI soniyAne enI jiMdagImAM navo vega ane navo utsAha maLyAM ane sAthosAtha evI zraddhA paNa jAgI ke jo huM prayatna karuM to mArA aMdhatvane oLaMgIne moTA bhAganuM kAma karI zakuM tema chuM. 152 * mATIe ghaDacAM mAnavI