Generation Gap

Author(s): Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation

Page 35

person. They even tell me this, that their father is such a weakling because he keeps scolding them. (P.183)
Questioner: We should not scold them to the point where it begins to have a negative effect on our own minds.
Dadashri: Scolding with such intensity is wrong. You should scold them in a make-believe manner, as though you are acting out a role in a play. In a play, a person will say anything, but he knows from within that it is not real. (P.186)
Questioner: What should we do when scolding is necessary,
but it hurts them?
Dadashri: You should then ask for forgiveness from within. If you have over-reacted in anger towards someone, go directly to that person and apologize. And if that is not possible, then you must do pratikraman from within. Ask for forgiveness from his Soul. You yourself are pure Soul (Shuddhatma), and you have to tell 'Chandulal', your relative self, to do pratikraman. You have to keep the two separate. Tell yourself from within that you should speak in a way that does not hurt anyone. And despite this, if it still hurts your children, you have to tell 'Chandulal' to do pratikraman.
Questioner: How are we to ask forgiveness if the child is very young?
Dadashri: You should ask for forgiveness sincerely from within. With 'Dada Bhagwan', your pure Soul as your witness, you should first do confess your wrongdoing (alochana), apologise for it (pratikraman) and resolve never to repeat the mistake (pratyakhyan) to the Soul within the child. This will immediately reach his Soul. (P.186)
Questioner: If we scold our children for their own sake, are we committing a sin?
Dadashri: No, you are actually binding merit karma (punya). If you scold your child, or even beat your child for his own good, you bind punya. That anger binds punya, because it is for the welfare of the child. If it were a sin to do so, then none of these religious teachers and ascetics would attain liberation. A guru that continually reproaches his disciples binds merit karma, because his intentions are good and he has their best interest at heart. According to the Lord there is no injustice. It is only sinful when one becomes angry for his selfish gain. How beautiful and precise is nature's justice! This justice is the foundation for one's ideal duties and obligations.
When you scold or beat your child for his own benefit, you bind merit karma, but when you do it with a belief that you are his father and that he needs beating and you assume the role of a father, then you will bind demerit karma (paap).
Questioner: The father may get annoyed but what if the son