Generation Gap

Author(s): Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation

Page 59

frequently because of such small differences. However, if she is of your own caste, the chances of such minor frictions are less. Do you understand? Even the language she might speak will differ to your own and she will complain that you do not speak well.
dwesh will have positive results. Otherwise if you let it go, he will think that you approve and he will continue dating. What is wrong with telling him? If you are walking through a bad neighborhood, do you not take extra care with your wallet? Likewise, when there is potential danger, you must warn your children. (P.468)
Questioner: You say that when one marries within his own caste there will not be any conflicts, but we see conflicts in same caste marriages also. What is the reason for this?
Questioner: What kind of qualities should we look for in a spouse before entering into a marriage?
Dadashri: Yes, there are conflicts, but they are also resolved. They enjoy each other's company, whereas with a spouse from another caste, mutual dislikes will set in and they will grow over time. This leads to an increasing sense of frustration and tension, for which he has no solution and he is not able to express to anyone either. I have seen many couples suffering in these situations. (P.463)
Dadashri: You do not need to look at them too critically. When you meet your potential suitor and you feel no attraction towards him or her, then you should not proceed further. It is not necessary to look for any other qualities. It is the initial attraction that is important.
Questioner: What sort of attraction?
Nowadays it does not present a problem to marry outside of one's caste. In the past it was a problem. (P.467)
Questioner: But it is not in our hands if they marry an American!
Dadashri: From the first glance, when you see the person, there is an inner attraction. You are drawn to that person, just as you would when you see an object in a shop. You will not be able to purchase that object unless you are attracted to it. Attraction is based on previous accounts. In the absence of such an account, no one can marry. There has to be an attraction. (P.479)
Dadashri: Although it is not in your hands does that mean you have to let it go completely? You must tell your children that they cannot go around with American girls and that it is not good for them. Such repeated coaxing done without raag
Women are ridiculed when they are asked to parade themselves in front of their potential suitors for approval. What a terrible