Generation Gap

Author(s): Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation

Page 61

There is nothing wrong with marriage. You can get married, but do so with the understanding that there will be problems in the marriage. One has no choice but to get married. Only in certain cases there are exceptions when a girl had the deep inner intent in her past life to remain celibate. Her situation will be different. If you accept from the very beginning, that in a marriage, one will be faced with many difficult situations, then you will not be faced with any unpleasant surprises. If, however you have a very idealistic view of marriage, you will be disappointed and miserable. It is not an easy task to enter your mother-in-law's house. In rare cases one might come across a husband whose parents are not living. (P.490)
People that are civilized do not fight. They always manage to sleep peacefully without bickering. It is the uncivilized ones who argue and fight relentlessly with each other. (P.492)
Questioner: We don't go to any parties where they serve alcohol and meat, but we do go to parties given by our friends, whose parents all know one another and who do not serve alcohol or meat.
Dadashri: But what do you get out of it?
Questioner: Enjoyment. It's a lot of fun!
Dadashri: Enjoyment? There is even enjoyment in eating.
But while eating, you should tell yourself that you need to exercise some control. Then gradually you will really enjoy the food. It is because you do not restrict yourself that you do not enjoy your food. You keep searching for enjoyment in other things.
Questioner: Should we allow our children to go to these parties? And how many times a year should we let them go?
Dadashri: People have learnt from experience and have come to the conclusion that it is always better for girls to listen to their parents and act according to their parents' wishes. And after marriage they should comply with the wishes of their husband.
Questioner: Should boys do the same? Should they also have to listen to their parents?
Dadashri: Even boys must go along with their parents' wishes. With boys, you can be a little more liberal and more lenient. Your son can stay out late at night even if he goes alone, but can a girl walk around alone late in the night?
Questioner: No, a girl would be afraid.
Dadashri: It is fine to be liberal with the boys. Girls shouldn't have so much freedom because in general they are afraid to stay out late. If you run into problems now, you will ruin your