Generation Gap

Author(s): Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation

Page 34

Dadashri: How will it help the situation by getting rid of his temper?
Dadashri: Weakness. Anger is a weakness. It is this weakness that makes a person angry. He himself does not get angry. After he gets angry, he realizes that it was a wrong. He is remorseful, which goes to show that it is not in his control. This goes to show that he does not have control over it. This machine, this body and its contents, is overheated, so you should wait for it to cool down and then you can pursue the matter. (P.182)
Questioner: He will not fight with us.
Dadashri: As a parent, you should conduct yourself in such a way that he does not detect anger in you. When he sees you get angry, he will decide that he can be angrier than his father. If you stop getting angry, he will too. Look at me. Since I have conquered my anger, no one fights with me. Even when I tell them to get angry with me, they shrug their shoulders. (P. 181)
When you become irritated with your children, you are binding a new karma for your next life. There is nothing wrong in displaying irritation to them, as long as you do not feel and suffer the irritation. It should be dramatic.
Questioner: They do not become quiet unless we scold them.
Questioner: We have to get angry with our children so that they do the right thing. Don't we have to fulfill this duty as parents?
Dadashri: There is nothing wrong in scolding them. But when you become involved in the scolding, your facial expression changes to one of disgust. In doing so, you will bind negative karma. Go ahead and scold them, but keep your facial expression pleasant. It is because your ego arises that your facial expression becomes ugly.
Dadashri: Why must you become angry? What is wrong with simply explaining things to them? You are not creating anger. Anger just happens. The anger that you display is not considered anger. It is not considered anger to scold your child. So show anger. It is acceptable to demonstrate anger, but instead you become angry from within. It is one thing to display anger and another to become angry. (P.181)
Questioner: Then children will think that we are not serious when we scold them.
Questioner: What is the reason behind anger?
Dadashri: It is enough even if they think that. Only then will it have an impact, otherwise it will not affect them at all. If you keep scolding them, they will conclude that you are a weak