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not your mistake; the mistake is mine because why did I speak in a way as to cause a matbhed? So one has to see how he can adjust to the world. You may be looking out for the good of the other person, for example, in the hospital you are there only for the good of the patient and so you continue to pester him, 'Do this, don't do that.' But the patient gets tired of it and thinks, "What is all this hassle about?
So support that which gets the task accomplished. If one thing does not work, then try something else. And if that does not work either, try something else. The aim is to get things accomplished.
The Root Cause of Separation Due to
Differences in Opinion (Matbhed)
We all have to learn to live in a way that does not cause any separation due to differences in opinion (matbhed). If any matbhed occurs, it is verily your own mistake; it is your own weakness for sure. The other person must find closure and inner satisfaction (samadhan) from you. The responsibility for the other person's samadhan lies with you.
What would you think if the other person does not attain samadhan through you? Would you not think that he lacks understanding?
Questioner: Yes.
Dadashri: If you run into a problem, change your approach so that he has no problem accepting, and that is how you get your work done. If you are an understanding person, then you will change your approach and find closure and inner satisfaction (samadhan) for him. You are not an understanding person if you do not change. The other person will not change. That is why I never change anyone. I tell him, 'I will change, my friend'. You have to maintain an amicable environment.
At 11 o'clock, you come and tell me, 'You will have to
eat your lunch.' I ask you whether it would be acceptable for me to eat a little later and you tell me, "No! Eat now so that we can clean up and wind up everything,' so I will immediately sit down to eat. I will adjust with you. Now those who do not adjust, the world considers as fools. If you do not adjust in everything, what opinion will the other person have about you?
What is the definition of understanding (samjan)? That which 'fits,' or that which is accepted, is called understanding. And misunderstanding is that which does not fit'; that which is unacceptable. This is all you have to understand. Then you do not have to see whether it is right or wrong, lawful or unlawful.
Questioner: Being the Self (chetanta) is far ahead of understanding through the senses, is it not? Conflict will never occur if chetanta or the Self is present, will it?
Dadashri: No, conflict (athadaman) must never occur. Where there is conflict, there lies a lack of understanding on your part. There is no question about chetanta in this, the Self is verily the Self. It happens because there is misunderstanding within. How did this misunderstanding (unsamajan) occur? It is because deep within, there is the root of egoism. As long as the root of the ego is there, it will keep on rising. It will harass you and cause problems for you and it will not let you rest. Therefore, you have to slowly remove the root out of there. As soon as someone says something, that root of the ego within pops up, and it does not let you be at peace. No matter how much you try to suppress it, it will not let you rest.
Instead, if you maintain, 'I do not know anything, then as a Shuddhatma you are a Gnani and 'Chandubhai' is the one dealing with the worldly life. Do You Take Adjustment or do Pratikraman When there is No Acceptable Solution?
Questioner: If someone tells me to do something and
