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Aptavani-6
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Aptavani-6
you do happen to hurt anyone, then the Lord has said to do pratikraman for it.
Questioner: Where is the need to do pratikraman when helpful-hurtful is not in the language of Lord Mahavir?
Dadashri: Because the other person gets hurt. The other person should not get hurt; is that not the language of the Lord?
Questioner: But what if our intention is good and he still gets hurt?
Dadashri: Your intention may be good; regardless of what your intentions may be, no one should be hurt. If anyone gets hurt, you will be stuck with the karma. Therefore, get your work done without hurting anyone.
Questioner: People do not like hearing the truth, so what remains to be said anyway?
Dadashri: No, it is not that they do not like to hear the truth. But when is truth considered as the truth? You do not have to look at just the truth. There should be three other parts along with it also. It should be beneficial; it should be pleasant to the other person. Whether you are telling the truth or not, it should please the other person and you should not have ill intention or self-gain in what you are saying. If, in speaking the truth, it hurts the other person, then it means that you do not know how to speak at all. The truth you speak should have the following three qualities: it should be pleasing and agreeable (priya), it is beneficial to the other person (hitkari) and it is short and simple (mita). Mita means that the other person should not feel, 'This man keeps talking continuously like a radio!' Words that please the other person are the truth. Those who have insisted on the truth have suffered invariably and consistently.
Dadashri: That is not called truth. There is no reason to flatter anyone. It is something one has discovered; one flatters the other person because of his own mistake. Speech that comes forth should be such that it fits, is acceptable, to the other person.
Questioner: If one thinks about how the other person will take it, then there is no end to it.
Dadashri: You should not think about all that. You have to tell 'Chandubhai' to do the pratikraman. That is all you have to say. This is the science of Akram. Nothing will touch you if you understand this much. And whenever 'we ask "Chandubhai, *Are you 'Chandubhai' or 'pure Soul (Shuddhatma)?' he will say, 'I am Shuddhamma.' That is it. What else is there to ask?
Then if 'Chandulal' does something wrong, the only thing that happens is that his happiness will be obstructed, that is all.
It will be useful if everyone in the world likes us. If the world does not like us, then it is our own mistake. That is all you have to understand. Therefore, adjust everywhere. Otherwise, there is no end to this problem. I will say something, he will say something else; people are not likely to listen, are they? People look for something that is acceptable to them.
Many people tell me, 'Dada, you must know this,' or *Dada, you must know that,' I tell them, 'I do not know anything. That is why I learned about the Arma.'
Why should we needlessly engage in discussions everywhere which have no value? Being such a busybody gets one involved for no reason at all. Being within limits is good. Excessive involvement is not good.
You should adjust to whatever is acceptable to everyone. I do not have any separation due to differences in opinion (matbhed) with anyone. The moment a marbhed occurs, I realize that it is my mistake and I immediately become aware. No matter how inappropriate and at odds your talk with me is, it is
Questioner: Is flattering someone, or unnecessarily agreeing with them, considered truth?
