Book Title: Chitrabhanu Man with Vision Author(s): Clare Rosenfield Publisher: Jain Meditation International Centre New YorkPage 55
________________ . Each moment holds the potential for a dynamic illumination, transforming the quality and fabric of one's awareness and living. Each glimpse brings one closer to the ultimate spiritual freedom, moksha. The manifestation of a spiritual cleansing is often accompanied by a physical crisis, even an intense struggle for life. Rup experienced the throes of such a trial in the summer of 1940. After he had completed his final examinations for his major studies in psychology and all the requirements for his Bachelor's Degree, he returned to his father's house in Tumkur. One evening after taking a long walk through the gardens surrounding the house, he felt a slight pain in the muscles of one leg and also suffered from a headache. He took no particular note of these symptoms. - The next morning when he tried to get up, the slightest movement caused great pain in his joints. He had a fever which shot up higher and higher as the day advanced. In the following days, his condition grew worse. Now and again he lost control of his temper. He could no longer move out of his bed. The inflammation spread from the fingers to the kneecaps. He suffered from extreme nervousness. The doctor diagnosed the ailment as rheumatic fever. He ordered complete rest and seclusion for Rup. For hours this normally calm boy tossed and turned with frantic gestures and wild expressions, like a caged animal. He became alarmed at the way his fingers were gnarled and paralyzed. He "was horrified to be seen in such a helpless condition. At times he passed into delirium. Finally he fell into a state of seeming unconsciousness. For seven days he remained in this state. His family was frightened but powerless. There was no one who could help and there was no one at fault. What we call illness is nothing but the working of a natural law: what we sow we reap. In the language of the ancient masters, it is the law of karma. At some time in our past moments of unawareness of life, when our vision is obscured and we don't see the far-reaching consequences of our every thought, word, and deed, we send out negative vibrations. Through lifetimes, the vibrations may spin, gathering momentum, picking up particles on their way. When these molecules 38 Jain Education International For Private & Personal Use Only www.jainelibrary.orgPage Navigation
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