________________
Envisioning the End Before the
Beginning
Monsoon season was approaching. Gurudev decided to spend this chaturmas in Thana, a suburb outside of Bombay where the people had known him and loved him since his early days as a novitiate. They felt honored to welcome him back to their upasray. There, in his restful and relaxed meditations, he took time to be with himself, to see his life, and to free himself to choose what was conducive to his continued growth.
When the water is calm, you can see what is at the bottom. It allows the depth to reveal itself.
In those four months of quiet contemplation, he saw clearly what was meant to unfold in his lifetime. He envisioned how all the various parts of his life would fit together and come to completion.
He realized first that ahimsa, non-violence, and reverence for life was the very texture of his thought and feeling, the gist of his life, the conviction behind his word and deed.
Jam bom for peace and peace is my life. I do not want to be the cause of anything which is going to disturb the peace and cause quarrel.
Once the tree outgrows the fence, it no longer needs its protection. It is blossoming in its own nature. Now Gurudev felt appreciation for the formal disciplines of the monkhood; through them, he had learned the value of austerity. He had had time to meditate and know himself. It had taught him to go beyond the small self and suffer for the people. It had been his school, his supportive fence. But now he was ready to go further, to live the message without any outer dependency, framework, or identity. He had a vision. Now he would follow
it.
The vision which had inspired him to go to Europe became clearer and clearer. He realized that for many lifetimes he had cherished a deep deep compassion for mankind and all living beings. That had helped him in this lifetime to refine and cleanse his heart and live in a pure state of reverence and
278
Jain Education International
For Private & Personal Use Only
www.jainelibrary.org
