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First Experiences
It was a beautifully mild and pleasant morning. Munishree Chandraprabh Sāgarji began his first day as a muni. The glow from the day of initiation continued to warm him from within, and he was an eager and serious aspirant. He focused his morning meditation on ko-aham? or “Who am I?” By continuing to repeat ko with the in-breath, aham with the outbreath, he took a plunge into his subconscious, daring to churn it up and confront what arose. When he found temporary answers, old habits, greeds and buried resentments, he used the phrase na-aham — “not l”. The secret, he was taught, lay in not identifying with his past conditionings, but to peel them away, just as one peels away the layers of an onion, and to have faith that eventually he would come to so-aham, the sweet inner core.
After meditation, it was time for him to join Pannyas Shree Chandra Sāgarji and a few other monks on the daily vihār. All were barefoot, as was customary, and carried the small broom, the monk's bowl, and a walking staff. They walked until midmorning, completing nearly twelve miles. Some of them walked in silence, at a pace of nearly three or four miles an hour. Some of them pondered a Sanskrit mantra which their teacher gave them. The silence permitted them to become attuned both to the rhythm of their moving limbs and to their state of mind. The more they walked, the more clear and spacious their minds became. At the same time, they remained keenly aware of the path which they scrutinized as they proceeded, taking care not to tread upon any unsuspecting creature with their bare feet.
Arriving at a village, the monks went to a few houses to receive alms or bhikshā, their first daily meal. The gauchari practice of the monkhood required them to refrain from cooking or preparing food for themselves. Since they had re
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