I am The Soul Part 02

Author(s): Tarulatabai Mahasati
Publisher: Shri Gujarati Shwetambar Sthanakwasi Jain Association
Catalog link: https://jainqq.org/explore/006791/1

Page #1
I AM THE SOUL ! Discourses by Dr. Tarulatabai Mahasatiji www.jainelib MAPh.D.

Page #2
Silent delineation ... The unwavering, unflinching, ethereal atmic state ... beyond all the reasons of vibration ... the mountain-like state ... the emaciation of the internal affected disposition ... the supreme progress of the inner strength in a frail body ... the attainment of the abode of the Siddhas ... now as sure as the despatch of an arrow shot from the bow ... the mountain-like stability symbolising the supreme devoted pursuit ... the eternally separate entities of atma - the substance and deha - the container ... and with the end of the container deha ... the formless ... the colourless ... the one in whom there are many ... and the many in whom there is but one ... the supreme state of Siddha beyond the body... Soul ... only the Soul... and nothing else, but... I am the Soul! ... : I am the Soul! I am the Soul! www.jainelibrary.og

Page #3
I am the Soul ! an English rendering of the original Gujarati discourses based on Srimad Rajachandra's 'Atmasiddhi Shastra' by Dr. Tarulatabai Mahasatiji M.A.,Ph.D. Volume 2

Page #4
I am the Soul by Dr. Tarulatabai Mahasatiji M.A.,Ph.D. an English rendering of originally Gujarati discourses, based on Srimad Rajachandra's 'Atmasiddhi Shastra' collectively published as 'huM AtmA chu' Published by: Sri Gujarati Swetamber Sthanakwasi Jain Association 78/79, Ritherdon Road, Purushwalkam, Chennai 600 007 in association with Research Foundation for Jainology "Sugan House" 18, Ramanuja Iyer Street, Sowcarpet, Chennai 600 079 First English edition Publishers Price: Rs. 400/- per set, in India US $ 30.00 per set, outside India Available from the Publishers, and also from: Sri Gunvantray M. Barvalia, 601, Smeet Apartment, Upashraya Lane, Ghatkopar (E), Mumbai 400 077 Ms. Varshaben Shah A-23. Vardhaman Nagar, Ground Floor Narsinha Lane, Malad (West), Mumbai 600 064 Translation, typesetting, design and printing by: IMPRINTS 51, First Main, Tata Silk Farm, Basavanagudi, Bangalore 560 004 email: imprints51@hotmail.com Tel: +91-80-676 5443/676 0251

Page #5
About us Shri Gujarati Swetamber Sthanakwasi Jain Association was established in 1975 with an aim of bringing together all Gujarati Sthanakwasi Jains and to invite Gujarati Sthanakwasi Jain Sadhus and Sadhvis to southern India, so that the community could benefit from the sermons and preachings of Bhaguwun Mahaveer rendered in Gujarati - its mother tongue. The Association had for its objectives, the propagation of Jainism, keeping alive its Jain traditions, promoting religious and philosophical publications, conducting periodical lectures, creating facilities for the vihar of the saints, performing vaiyavach (providing the Sadhus and Sadhvis with their permissible food, clothing, shelter, medical care etc.). The first major step was the Diksha Mahotsava of Sadhvi Shwetabai Mahasatiji. The first publication was the collection of Gujarati discourses * 31793', rendered by Sadhvi Tarulatabai Mahasatiji, followed by its Hindi translation. This was followed up by Sadhvi Prankunwarbai Mahasatiji. The Association has grown from strength to strength and has perhaps the largest Upashraya with arrangements to render religious, social, and medical service to public at large. We aspire and hope to be able to serve the society in various ways. Rasiklal C. Badani President Shri Gujarati Swetamber Sthanakwasi Jain Association Chennai October 31, 2000

Page #6
2-4 I am the Soul Sri Gujarati Swetamber Sthanakwasi Jain Association 78/79, Ritherdon Road Purushwalkam, Chennai 600 007 Publications Committee for Gujarati and Hindi editions Sarvashri Surendrabhai Manilal Mehta Jayantibhai K. Shah Balvantbhai Mavani Gangjibhai Vora Nautambhai Sheth Chunibhai Udani Shantibhai Desai Nathubhai Badani Prafulbhai Shah Manharbhai Doshi Rasikbhai Badani Mahendrabhai Rupani Publications Committee for the English edition Sarvashri Surendrabhai M. Mehta, Founder President Rasiklal C. Badani, President Dhirubhai U. Shah, Vice President Manharlal C. Doshi, Vice President Dineshchandra C. Doshi, Secretary Mansukhlal G. Mehta, Jt. Secretary Gulabchand T. Uchat, Treasurer Praful R. Shah

Page #7
Research Foundation for Jainology The Research Foundation for Jainology was established in the year 1982 aiming to foster awareness of Jaina Philosophy and tenets in the mind of public viz. development of body, enrichment of mind, sublimation of emotions, character building and illumination of the spirit within. The Foundation is a scientific and industrial research organisation, recognised by the Government of India, Ministry of Science and Technology, Department of Scientific and Industrial Research, New Delhi. Subsequently the Foundation established inthe year 1988, a full fledged Department of Jainology in the Madras University having post graduate and research courses upto Ph. D. level. The Foundation has published several valued publications in Tamil, Hindi and Gujarati. These have been well received by students, teachers and scholars alike. In keeping with this trend the Foundation has now joined hands with Shri Gujarati Swetamber Sthanakwasi Jain Associaiton, Chennai, to bring forth the English version of the now famous and much sought after Gujarati and Hindi publication' 3116H B' - as 'I am the Soul. The Foundation is confident that this endeavour will lead to the establishment of a much needed Indological publishing house of the Jain community in South India. Efforts have already begun on the possibilities of bringing out the translation of 'BITCH in several South Indian languages, to benefit students and research scholars in Jainology. Krishanchand Choradia General Secretary Research Foundation for Jainology

Page #8
2-6 I am the Soul Research Foundation for Jainology "Sugan House" 18, Ramanuja Iyer Street Sowcarpet, Chennai 600 079 Executive Committee Sarvashri Surendrabhai M. Mehta, President Sripal, IPS Retd., Chairman Krishanchand Choradia, General Secretary Dulichand Jain, Secretary G. L. Surana, Treasurer

Page #9
Contents 2-3 2-5 2-7 2-8 Shri Gujarati Shwetamber Sthanakwasi Jain Association Research Foundation for Jainology Contents Reflections of The Self About the Contents of the book Index to Chapters Atmasiddhi - Srimadji's manuscript reproduced Atmasiddhi - rendered in Devanagari script Contemplation upon the Self 2-11 2-13 2-15 2-29 2-41

Page #10
Reflections of 'The Self' It is a matter of great joy that revered Tarulatabai Mahasatiji selected the Atmasiddhi Shastra for her lectures during the Chaturmasa of Samwat 2041. Jaina sadhus and sadhvis are constantly on the move, they stay in a place for four months during the chaturmasa. Sermons are delivered everyday in the morning for four consecutive months. Each day a new topic is introduced and commented upon avoiding repetition. A work or two is selected in accordance with one's taste and ability to comment upon. The Uttaradhyayana Sutra, Dasavaikalika Sutra, Jnatadharma Katha Sutra, Kalpa Sutra, Yogadrasti Samuccaya, Samaradityakatha, Yogashastra, etc. may be taken up during the discourse. Smaller the work, greater is the demand on art and ability to comment and analyse its meaning. Revered Tarulatabai Mahasatiji selected Atmasiddhi Shastra, a work in 142 couplets for her lectures, which goes to prove her eloquence. It is not an easy task to deliver lectures on the above work, which is highly spiritual and philosophical in its content. Any one can deviate from the topic and pass the time of the sermons. Only a person who has read widely, practises meditation and other spiritual pursuits alone can analyse and comment upon a subject of this kind. One of the Jaina sadhus, late Tattvananda Shri Vijayji Maharaj some times chose the "Namaskara Mahamantra' for the chaturmasa sermons. He used to comment upon the nine padas of it from different stand-points, avoiding repetition and bringing to light a new meaning of the same. The audience found his discourses interesting and inspiring. Revered Tarulatabai Mahasatiji has secured Ph.D., from the Bombay University. She made a comparative study of the spiritual literature of saint poets and this proves her interest in

Page #11
2-9 I am the Soul spirituality. These saint poets raised themselves above sectarianism and propitiated the supreme self. Their spiritual experiences were of a very high standard and their literature is deeply touching and meaningfully rich and influential. Revered Sadhviji has made a thorough study of the literature of Srimad Rajachandra and is qualified to deliver lectures on his Atmasiddhi Shastra. At the age of 29, Srimad Rajachandra composed the Atmasiddhi Shastra in just about two hours at Nadiad in 1896 A.D. The work is a proof of his pure thought process and his extraordinary command over words. He has used the right words at right places. Even today, after so many years, the text is in such a fine shape one does not feel like changing a single word or line from its place. Srimad Rajachandra in his Atma Siddhi Shastra has given a clear picture of the nature of the pure self. He says AtmA che, te nitya che, che kartA nijakarma, i HTCM, cost H , TH 34r4 guf.....83 i.e. There is the existence of the soul, it is eternal and it is the doer and enjoyer of karmas. There is emancipation and the means to acquire it is Sudharma i.e. right conduct. The author has elaborated these six characteristics of the soul in such an impressive and convincing style that even an ordinary man can grasp it with ease. He has narrated the nature of a person in search of the self (Atmarthi) and also that of a person who is dogmatic (Matarthi). He has also carved out the path of liberation and importance of a noble preceptor for spiritual upliftment. In this way the Atmasiddhi Shastra has become a mini scripture. Various philosophical topics viz. Nine Tattvas, six Dravyas, eight Karmas, fourteen Gunasthanas, six Leshyas etc., are elaborated in Jaina Agamas, the knowledge of which is important to understand the pathway of liberation. The

Page #12
2-10 I am the Soul Atmasiddhi Shastra serves as a unique means to grasp the knowledge of the essential constituents of the pathway of liberation, without undergoing any mental strain. Srimad Rajachandra was a wise and learned man and had realised the true nature of the self. He used to be always absorbed in meditation. The following two lines of the text that distinguishes pure soul from the body are true of Srimad Rajachandra - deha chatAM jenI dazA, varte dehAtIta te jJAnInAM caraNamAM, ho vaMdana agaNita 142 i.e. A self realised man possesses a body but it is not influenced by the bodily afflictions and pleasures. I offer my humble salutations at the feet of such a perfect soul. In 107 chapters the learned Sadhvi has shed valuable light on the philosophical contents of the Atmasiddhi Shastra. She has also analysed and elaborated each word of each couplet in an impressive and inspiring way. People desirous of self realisation have benefited immensely from her discourses on Atmasiddhi Shastra. Only a self-dependent soul engrossed in meditation and one striving for the destruction of jnanavarniya karmas can comment upon such a philosophical and spiritual tenet like Atmasiddhi Shastra. We shall forever be indebted to Tarulatabai Mahasatiji for giving these valuable and meritorious lectures. It is my earnest desire that people from all walks of life derive inspiration from these lectures. Jain Educationa International Prof. Ramanlal Shah For Personal and Private Use Only.

Page #13
Contents of the book A detailed and exhaustive commentary on the Atmasiddhi Shastra was completed in about 800 pages and as it was not practical to publish in one volume, we decided to publish the same in two volumes. The first volume includes Gathas (couplets) 1 to 58. At the very outset the six essential characteristics of the soul as told by Srimad Rajachandra are introduced. Today people are spiritually ignorant and materialistic in their attitude. They are unaware of their true selves and involved in futile material affairs. The Atmasiddhi Shastra elaborates the essentials for spiritual upliftment and also describes the nature and dealings of a person who is spiritually inclined. In the second volume Gathas 59 to 142 are analysed and the six essential characteristics of the soul are elaborated. Also the doubts arising in the mind of the disciple regarding the same are cleared. The disciple who has acquired the 'Bodhi Bija' i.e. right faith realises 'the self and the nature of a self realised soul is portrayed. The subjects discussed in the first 118 Gathas as also summarised by Srimad Rajachandra are also presented in this volume. The literature of Srimad Rajachandra is written in a very simple language and the style too is unique. One may question that when the work is simple and self explanatory what is the need of such a detailed and exhaustive commentary? The reason for this is to understand and explain the importance of Atmasiddhi Shastra from Jaina view-point. Although the work is simple, it is replete with spiritual and metaphysical knowledge and the entire text of Atmasiddhi Shastra is analysed from various view points.

Page #14
2-12 I am the Soul Revered Mahasatiji always commenced the discourse with salutations to the Arhats and Siddhas and concluded with the meditation on the nature of the pure soul. These two have become an important part of the discourse and so each chapter of this work commences and concludes with the narration of the same as the aim of all spiritual practices is the realisation of the self". I sincerely hope that this work will provide an insight into Jaina philosophy, quench the thirst for right knowledge in one and all and be instrumental in self-realisation. Praful Shah

Page #15
Index to chapters up on thinking over! Body is but a coincidence... ... hence, it is always eternal The influences of previous birth... Atma is eternal as substance... The speaker is not momentary .. find with what it mixes! therefore, atma cannot be bound! If the Chetan were not the inspiration . . . Detached though it may seem... When chetan is aware of the Self... then there remains no zone of suffering! The karma in thought is of its own volition . . . Cannot differentiate between poison and nectar. Effect cannot be without cause... Karma culminates naturally. But it has no salvation... The natural disposition leads to moksa "... total detachment! There certainly is Moksapada... rise in my fortune! the thought of moksa is the stay in Self So the state of break-through.... ... prime entanglement of Karma ... bereft of any illusion! Karmas are of many types... Enlightenment and Veetaraag State destroy... Forgiveness and the like destroy them. 403 410 417 424 431 436 441 450 454 461 468 474 481 486 494 502 515 518 526 533 538 545 554 563 570 574 581 588

Page #16
I am the Soul 595 601 608 612 620 626 633 639 645 651 658 666 673 681 2-14 The statements in their totality ... Caste or attire make no difference The inner search prevails! Pure equanimity comes ... Experience, attention and awareness! When conduct rises ... Only the own natural disposition ... A dream of millions of years ... ... unrestrained true form! If you think you will get ... Naturally into a trance! The state of self, located in the self ... Ageless, endless, indestructible and ... When the nature turns towards nijabhava ... ... the form of pure chetana! Aha, aha, Shri Sadguru ... What shall I offer at the Prabhu's feet... Servant, I am but your servant ... You showed the difference ... There is no illness like illusion of atma ... Do not name the state of life ... It is certainly not the essence ... There have been sages before ... All jivas are similar to Siddha ... One who abandons the reason ... Talking about knowledge ... The mumukshu is always alert ... All else can be called illusion ... The entire world is like left-overs ... In spite of the body, the state of those ... 687 694 705 713 720 733 742 751 762 769 775 782 787 794 805

Page #17
Pujya Srimad Rajachandraji on whose divine composition - Atmasiddhi are these discourses based (above: Artist's visualisation of the inspired composition)

Page #18
.

Page #19
* way nhat, v, , , , haang 6 ct oh - 4 em3 km. + h:+ e equi, hun theo) { ek (thethepd, h h hwaenn. e" epn - nung cch.nn 24 h h:325achaa, re aehi , & : 3 ae& elaaeh 3e9, kh n e kh 3 e+ thep-999a. 60 (2 ech maay1 4 hsnun S 34,mto vie, 42" e`ecchrih, 2ses rucchii + the5. " 3,2.8 cchaak rim, t a maaek+ecch, khith m.kh 5 esk, heecotti dn+ + eeeew + cchk. ai~ + 6win+, n: c eccheccherm 14, khn 26 khid+. ng ciniani a anim & aui dinazie, chieni a u ricza, arichi af on ne. cchaa+ 43 43 44eng, , wng ve <+ - th), ewiewn 4 4 <<

Page #20
ontenan . vino . m5 5 531, 2063 Aco ... pratyaan43 11 net, 22 63 &002, yo Ghetan, whet. // 21943. 65 an-5.16 650 , 2rnm0015, ant 35. 12 meaninnocuri, 351 pra.5 11 206013 kora, China,41.13 51. te ni je . Mi i, Marate noint.5 14 .5 2.57, me, 5.main mind. . 5. 17 achha Timin, 2-16 in anand Tn. anot it. 15 2576, rm mere ala, 5 3t, an m43, 4 52020 nine ne, not ant mai 216329i, neex.ant. 18 2013 051 , 5.yonain, 013 24 255,RAM . at naahal, sannn 28 meM mat, th-Nomin. 2. AAP ant, aim tic neidRA munnie 1

Page #21
`n hya y 3, 27 ht (+eng, ain 1 ae , hata 6 5 4 ruup `yng, + hight hdeR tor, Mc 39 khn. 23 - thdekhket n.w. vt ecch`n, 3 hecch 83 8% thntn odyhnd, wiprit nee. wch. - + 20 naaeyed, 2 ecchn, duud waadkhr. 8 aeden. 12 1 to 2.43 n. 48 &~~ thraa 4 e3 , 4, 5, (lhewne" thun 24 athwmiitehi, naangekh, hed khaad , maana huueekheet, wng 15 3-% , aikhaa 46 46 telt+ na 0 cadedii, 6324ekh. 24 mA. (nn khn 21, he4,641, (* ohet 39, ain, staad nn. 2 ekh64 6 0, ed 184 13 edi rin waan 6, 6tth (8. 36 % +1 44 hdehi, Meneker na 4 en+, thaa thrngot 31 kh& } y1 aeswy, khlii ha &ecchn, `aacchhte: 1 khn, thii khud . 32

Page #22
ta: 25: haaeng, hng* -.ae4 3 7ethkhn, dehtecch`ekh. 33 thetheg + (1 phter 9 : htty, A ain. 61, "k 39 18 duud, etaaae& 2 s 31 hnainenephaa, nk tan tits, 1 eetisex n. hsmenecch 3 at ethh , 43 thewnkha +. wid ecchudehr, no. 39 thph qn, waad 3 % 7sainekh, e% 8 tenepth. duudii d h n. 3ng 8:6vaedng, thethiienedde%, taa d: aedn, e`aaechekhy ain 34 niiae thii ewk ~t est e din, eg h ,644, o + waadlngot. 34 then ha 44 ainoten orn, elet, 1, en hi : hi hn83 84.3at, i + -aecch * ekh tuun he tv, ned :: dicchoge. 1 (ve A r ReRet, she* rhd, 33 engin 2 aes, tey x2+intra aaech, , , , , rth edin duuhnde cchtihe%, thiiek cchrh.73 42 nekh$ 35th, 2 tag n. hti tahm`, ringk ecch y.17

Page #23
mathI kadamAM bIje paNa 19 deha do 1: bhAva 19o, nathI dAvuM ra, pujAya nahIM, teva na baja je te zALA hoya je jAya jenara de! bhukha je hoya to, pa pa ii che, 17 mAtA, amalA I ibha, gALo, heM huM meMha nATe je vI bhASA mAM gola ula e aMta2 13 / to, saga navo che. paMca tuM da sAbAra rUma ugAma nAmAM deubAra, jAtA deda 21, aa te bane ja che, prA lAbhubhALa. 49 Jain Educationa International jAmbo devAkhAne ii, ratA devetALa, paNa temane viga che, ma aneALa 6. 691 48 eka che ho, ke jANe rUpa, mama phulabha re, te che mora 11 none, nirune 69manuM phALa, vadhavuM, dA velALa 63 For Personal and Private Use Only ka 1 jANe bhedane, jANo 1 I. grA, tmAne rIvA ke pa nI 15 13

Page #24
1 19-manebe, mATe 11 kA rUpameLa, e eka paTa, la ii navA chuM, tethI tene mALa, nAnA 1119, ke zuM sa1 vA vai ba 921judu hRSTa dezamAM, mULa deva hot, deda hoya je AgA, o na zArka vi vahu I meLavo ja che, keba amArevA1, he rahyuM pAme nahIM, kuLa na jAya. AtmAne re, jaLa je 2}ALo 3212 , ama20 bheTa gA bAvA paNa mAM, zAtmA nI vADI, deha khoba La Upade, te mo2e 1 1 varga Do. ka mAMdeza che, li kevaLa utpAtta lena, meLA na uvAca. zALAnAM svatvaLA Ave have, jAja teno pra che, 16 vive. 69 shsh svamala skru sI) che, ro ro palaTAye, 25 mgman ucendi, michi Ench mit. 52 vai1Aryana Jain Educationa International * enA juvatIne be utpanna lakhavuM jJAna, te natha kUhA binA, yApana hameM lAnA 17 For Personal and Private Use Only. " rUpI na kunala gIta 60 * 63

Page #25
* naan 3 pii dii d" thtYA : ve & +omth, 20 cm. x 4" en 24+ @ge, daaw 9 nn, ti mrut ev , n 3k + mn. 9 ep owaeth kh8. -at( esn + khn eph, di oda ainch. 49 eneo ykaht, 21st As 2 hecch, 1deel `r `rinsii ~ odcaaccha c ng aeen: 46 Res, cf cr24, ethen n 70 .n hnun n 90033, 3 yet et, *wa w e 38 + Ats.ge: 4.3 raak 42 , 3 khn khn, ek+ eh ", , 3hi nheeengaa ng. (,4 8 30 * 1 h`ng, 3M 39 34; thae at A+ech , 3 . ngb ec2cchaan thaawes, 32 46 , hw haw duuaenw, d? "yaekh. 3 or set wei. , e` . 93

Page #26
11nA ra1 - 214 19 hoya . mena kerA, rola ane je 3, irIkerA, jIe nArI garbha 1 tathAthatAM to ham jeketana ra0 11, tethI sada rUrUbhaLAvI, tetara nAme ja 19 76 kuLa hola kAma ne, jAsepha 1012 mAMga che. 92vA Iza, rA jinnAthe te 76 {[ IphLa phore, Izrva2 2 bhalA 3 je maha vokaLA, 1, yetana bane kina lAnamA, hutI Ahe reklAva gAya ne jALa, gugaLA Y ziSya vA iSTa du ku 211 : 3 phaLadAtA zrI trI Aga kA zva219, Jain Educationa International ja tApaNuM do, 19 jovA de so {LavelA ema. 11, sAga 1 216 033 vA ya. I-11 nA meLA, jAga re rajA 3jA rAmanAM, 119 ; e bhI For Personal and Private Use Only 16 ni291, mATe meLavI, bhrama jI pI sTrA, adA rena Go 2. .. he 181 81 ta

Page #27
225. 10l, A 3515, an , marrj ruo. 83 kara bhAra5, le 1829 640 m . 8r 31. 15219, in 12, 52 5jisameM, . mons. 2 te minaa , 205135219, nen 5. 1 5 ra 21 // 1. 86 zivya11. F- Maine a 5 no ra is Alo 15 Min 5, rin5.87 2523lore, 218 ulani, antim Raffein, 3 004in. 88 antar sa .25. ons,Met, neti nin ance maran, nath 30. 8 nahaniad m my, raza 5tni, 650 R5. RRB Ritbibhora, (RAian Morninlo . so 1m mari, naraviro5 64. Fan nirmi, P.ntine 2 mar na tanei, 265 anna sAthokI, 07 me

Page #28
bhI hii masti ma, nonina ne, an Dut. Actrenaut, 65 // 2- 1 ne Snan , aan.40 141 Aang na651, 65 65 // 45 2115.1. 20604364.4. 5iv, nichetan , in, 1 Tr-m , manoran, 4. Malan, tran+2. 58 -- 2 5i , . 56 te 329 , ka56 9. ar 10, natna, 5 . 5, 55 nati , Pina 25. 1.. Anche 4, liA . 181, on T5 51, then 1.1 I nin x13.i, Anigand i ntea. e 6. 1.2 le ki 16404 01.3 bholika, neta ae. Amamsane, ono Rite 1.1

Page #29
choDI no, mada te vAra, have bhAI A lepa, jnma lena hda ra96nAM T prIte, mAM karI jAya, te dI tA~ga, I vi2. jAti, ceSTanA bheAda, DAI ne do, tame je uDDI de, emAM bheda no 107 te bliAya Aje, bhAra'3o, to ke 11phItane, 24 aM2 co. kRtanI upAMva, bAju mola abhilA sAthe bheda aMta2tA, je me 108 nadarzana *9 1%, lade ardha goLa te, mAM ne 19. 13 lI chUTe dekhara jo, nAMde DarjA huM 18, nAralAItA uMTanAce bhAva dharmako marma oma gohele huM je moTI anaMta darzana La chuM, bAya ro te vAjo, kuAjalI, vRtto nitAlamAM, mA kahI1111 kALa tarIta thaI, TALe vimA, una gAya Apavo, zrIyadavasa 12 phebru 1010OM, khaMDa vasA, 25 pheba saLa, deza i nirbhara 113 Jain Educationa International koI varSanuM svaraDa, '1 badAma, vajAta de, vALa 1 2 1 14 tema re, za x 10 For Personal and Private Use Only. 11. da 16

Page #30
na caitALa, 1 naiti yuga Laka dama TayuM, kara diyAnuM ga vI garama, nimna sarvesAhano, pIThoLavA La he, vai199 rAdhAmAMya ziSyonA mAre. re hurkA lAItA harmano dilA va bAja TInALAM, ko 21 ude, tuM krva jALa (6) nizAMdI, 6, 12 13 '1- 11 89 kuMvara ke rUpa0, 13 me 3ra, ke are ne, dedA-136-120 116 11nArane kALI 119911, e zaha 15. majA virAvAna che, merU, Dura nA kuvA teTa zo, utkR-12t. 13 modI usane nikDatA, nehAle ne 56, 211 mo.sAmAM, kuLa chaniya 123 ma ho! do!I 116'3, zailAza 19 2, jI, ATo! aho! upara,124 aa aa zuM gajuM nAka, 13, eQ saudo; te to prabhune jAvo, ga6 cArIna koLyAMda hu bhaya, 121 A devADI zI, lokagIta, dA1,12 1 2 1 chuM, `Sa no Uta Jain Educationa International 33 ja ba10bheTe A kuvAda zrI tu mane 6 ThThuMOM abhya veLa, 1 mA jAma hita ku rahe cho bodha muLarA For Personal and Private Use Only 16 127

Page #31
84 Rich tary en . t! hi e. khnei enter, t2% 18 thechai6 khn orew.cchaamrii cchiin duuce, ch : aehy t ie, enecch ecch. 12 * 2-0 (ethen, rd 414 98 tiweuture aekhtheu* 13" din ephn ima, enid text at khn 29 khn ht, e%, 32 , 131 , thehi M PUn, kai+ ai ccheC, 46 khn , 134 aes heel s set, 3 cche hruuyaed, phcch 4 dv8ty. odn + . 133 treote4 en, engaaeht ri~, ut 30 trm, thuen e`echii , 13" 4 4 ehtu~, 6 he cchncch, ainuuaihte Gove, daa 34613% Stesttr (ed " * * dnid, *:dii ecchkh, k i6 hi c. 39 ny ecch 3% h%, 4 hun (phoe, A teng 2, hecch (edin 4.139 n, aed, khn r., cchMaan, eph, ecch, khn 4sh v2ge, M ae+ phn.134 2 tue5 mn eit, yest 2aink, :ck +14:, ae32 34 mit ai3aid maa he0, thnaeant, A sen elst. mae: ecch.ch. ecch ecch aes, h , eh hlt. haaengaetn. thaa Re : -4 , . + edd4aetai.ali+ aiwe cch.ech2 * duudcchneng4 , 42 , "edl eg ,

Page #32

Page #33
Atmasiddhi je svarUpa samajyA vinA, pAmyo duHkha ananta, samajAvyu te pada namuM, zrI sadguru bhagavaMta . . . . . 1 vartamAna A kALamAM, mokSamArga bahu lopa, vicAravA AtmArthani, bhAkhyo atra agopya . . . . . 2 koI kriyAjaDa thaI rahyA, zuSkajJAnamAM koI mAne mAraga mokSano, karuNA Upaje joI . . . . . 3 bAhya kriyAmAM rAcatA, aMtarbheda na kAMI jJAna mArga niSedhatA, teha kriyAjaDa AI . . . . . 4 baMdha mokSa che kalpanA, bhAkhe vANI mAMhI, varte mohAvezamA, zuSkajJAnI te AMhi . . . . . 5 vairAgyAdi saphaLa to, jo saha AtamajJAna, tema ja AtamajJAnanI, prAptitaNAM nidAna . . . . . 6 tyAga virAga na cittamAM, thAya na tene jJAna, aTake tyAga virAgamAM, to bhUle nijabhAna . . . . . 7 jyAM jyAM je je yogya che, tahAM samajavaM teha, tyAM tyAM te te Acare, AtmArthI jana eha . . . . . 8 seve sadgurucaraNane, tyAgI daI nijapakSa, pAme te paramArthane, nijapadano le lakSa . . . . . 9 AtmajJAna samadarzitA, vicare udayaprayoga, apUrva vANI paramazruta, sadguru lakSaNa yogya . . . . .10 pratyakSa sadguru sama nahIM, parokSa jina upakAra, evo lakSa thayA vinA, Uge na AtmavicAra . . . . . 11 sadgurunA upadeza vaNa, samajAya na jinarUpa, samajyA vaNa upakAra zo? samajye jinasvarUpa . . . . . 12

Page #34
2-30 I am the Soul AtmAdi astitvanAM, jeha nirUpaka zAstra, pratyakSa sadguru yoga nahi, tyAM AdhAra supAtra . . . . . 13 athavA sadgurue kahyAM, je avagAhana kAja, te te nitya vicAravAM, karI matAMtara tyAja . . . . . 14 roke jIva svacchaMda to, pAme avazya mokSa, pAmyA ema anaMta che, bhAkhyu jina nirdoSa . . . . . 15 pratyakSa sadguru yogathI, svacchaMda te rokAya, anya upAya karyA thakI, prAye bamaNo thAya . . . . . 16 svacchaMda, mata Agraha tajI, varte sadgurulakSa, samakita tene bhAkhiyuM, kAraNa gaNI pratyakSa . . . . . 17 mAnAdika zatru mahA, nijachaMde na marAya, jAtAM sadguru zaraNamAM, alpa prayAse jAya . . . . . 18 je sadguru upadezathI, pAmyo kevaLajJAna, guru rahyA chadmastha paNa, vinaya kare bhagavAna . . . . . 19 evo mArga vinaya taNoM, bhAkhyo zrI vItarAga, mULa hetu e mArgano, samaje koI subhAgya . . . . . 20 asadguru e vinayano, lAbha lahe jo kAMI, mahAmohinI karmathI, bUDe bhavajaLa mAMhI . . . . . 21 hoya mumukSu jIva te, samaje eha vicAra, hoya matArthI jIva te, avaLo le nirdhAra . . . . . 22 hoya matArthI tehane, thAya na AtamalakSa, teha matArthI lakSaNo, ahIM kahyAM nirpakSa . . . . . 23 matArthI lakSaNa bAhyatyAga paNa jJAna nahi, te mAne guru satya, athavA nijakuLadharmanA, te gurumAM ja mamatva . . . . . 24 je jinadehapramANa ne, samavasaraNAdi siddhi, varNana samaje jinanu, roki rahe nija buddhi . . . . . 25

Page #35
I am the Soul 2-31 pratyakSa sadguruyogamAM, varte dRSTi vimukha, asadgurune dRDha kare, nija mAnArthe mukhya . . . . . 26 devAdi gati bhaMgamAM, je samaje zrutajJAna, mAne nijamata veSano, Agraha muktinidAna . . . . . 27 lahyaM svarUpa na vRttinuM, grAM vrata abhimAna, grahe nahIM paramArthane, levA laukika mAna . . . . . 28 athavA nizcaya naya Ahe, mAtra zabdanI mAMya, lope sadvyavahArane, sAdhana rahita thAya . . . . . 29 jJAnadazA pAme nahIM, sAdhanadazA na kAMI, pAme teno saMga je, te bUDe bhavamAMhI . . . . . 30 e paNa jIva matArthamAM, nijamAnAdi kAja, pAme nahi paramArthane an-adhikArImAM ja . . . . . 31 nahi kaSAya upazAMtatA, nahi aMtara vairAgya, saraLapaNuM na madhyasthatA, e matArthI durbhAgya . . . . . 32 lakSaNa kahyAM matArthInAM, matArtha jAvA kAja, have kahuM AtmArthInAM, Atma artha sukhasAja . . . . . 33 AtmArthI lakSaNa AtmajJAna tyAM munipaNuM, te sAcA guru hoya, bAkI kuLaguru kalpanA, AtmArthI nahi joya . . . . . 34 pratyakSa sadguru prAptino, gaNe parama upakAra, traNe yoga ekatvathI, varte AjJAdhAra . . . . . 35 eka hoya traNa kALamAM, paramArathano paMtha, prere te paramArthane te vyavahAra samaMta . . . . . 36 ema vicArI aMtare, zodhe sadguruyoga, kAma eka AtmArtha-, bIjo nahi manaroga . kaSAyanI upazAMtatA, mAtra mokSa abhilASa, bhave kheda prANIdayA tyAM AtmArtha nivAsa . . . . . 38 . . . . .37

Page #36
2-32 I am the Soul dazA na evI jyAM sudhI, jIva lahe nahi joga, mokSamArga pAme nahIM, maTe na aMtara roga . . . . . 39 Ave jyAM evI dazA, sad gurubodha suhAya, te bodhe suvicAraNA, tyAM pragaTe sukhadAya . . . . . 40 jyAM pragaTe suvicAraNA, tyAM pragaTe nijajJAna, je jJAne kSaya moha thaI, pAme pada nirvANa . . . . . 41 Upaje te suvicAraNA, mokSamArga samajAya, guruziSya saMvAdathI, bhAluM SaTpada AMhI . . . . . 42 'AtmA che', 'te nitya che', 'che kartA nijakarma' , 'che bhoktA', vaLI 'mokSa che', 'mokSa upAya sudharma' . . SaTsthAnaka saMkSepamA, SaTdarzana paNa teha, samajAvA paramArthane, kahyAM jJAnIe eha . . . . . 44 zaMkA ziSya uvAca nathI dRSTimAM Avato, nathI jaNAtuM rUpa, bIjo paNa anubhava nahIM, tethI na jIvasvarUpa . . . . . 45 athavA deha ja AtamA, athavA iMdrIya prANa, mithyA judo mAnavo, nahi juduM eMdhANa . . . . . 46 vaLI jo AtmA hoya to, jaNAya te nahi kema? jaNAya jo te hoya to, ghaTa paTa Adi jema . . . . . 47 mATe che nahi AtamA, mithyA mokSa upAya, e aMtara zaMkAtaNo, samajAvo sadupAya . . . . . 48 samAdhAna sadguru uvAca bhAsyo dehAdhyAsathI, AtmA deha samAna, paNa te banne bhinna che, pragaTa lakSaNe bhAna . . . . . 49 bhAsyo dehAdhyAsathI, AtmA deha samAna, paNa te banne bhinna che, jema asi ne myAna . . . . . 50

Page #37
I am the Soul 2-33 je draSTA che dRSTino, je jANe che rUpa, abAdhya anubhava je rahe, te che jIvasvarUpa . . . . . 51 che iMdriya pratyekane, nija nija viSayanuM jJAna, pAMca iMdrInA viSayageM, paNa AtmAne bhAna . . . . . 52 deha na jANe tehane, jANe na iMdrI, prANa, AtmAnI sattA vaDe, teha pravarte jANa . . . . . 53 sarva avasthAne viSe, nyAro sadA jaNAya, pragaTa rUpa caitanyamaya, e eMdhANa sadAya . . . . . 54 ghaTa paTa Adi jANa tuM, tethI tene mAna; jANanArane mAna nahi, kahiye ketuM jJAna . . . . . 55 parama buddhi kRza dehamAM, sthULa deha mati alpa; deha hoya jo AtamA, ghaTe na Ama vikalpa . . . . . 56 jaDa cetanano bhinna che, kevaLa pragaTa svabhAva; ekapaNuM pAme nahIM, jane kALa dvayabhAva . . . . . 57 AtmAnI zaMkA kare, AtmA pote Apa; zaMkAno karanAra te, acaraja eha amApa . . . . . 58 zaMkA ziSya uvAca AtmAnA astitvanA, Ape kahyA prakAra; saMbhava teno thAya che, aMtara karye vicAra . . . . . 59 bIjI zaMkA thAya tyAM, AtmA nahIM avinAza; dehayogathI Upaje, deha viyoge nAza . . . . . 60 athavA vastu kSaNika che, kSaNe kSaNe palaTAya; e anubhavathI paNa nahIM, AtmA nitya jaNAya . . . . . 61 samAdhAna sadguru uvAca deha mAtra saMyoga che, vaLI jaDarUpI dRzya; cetananAM utpatti laya, konA anubhava vazya . . . . . 62

Page #38
2-34 I am the Soul jenA anubhava vazya e, utpanna laya- jJAna; te tethI judA vinA, thAya na keme bhAna . . . . . 63 / / je saMyogo dekhiye, te te anubhava dRzya; Upaje nahi saMyogathI, AtmA nitya pratyakSa . . . . . 64 jaDathI cetana Upaje, cetanathI jaDa thAya; evo anubhava koIne, kyAre kadI na thAya . . . . . 65 koI saMyogothI nahIM, jenI utpatti thAya; nAza na teno koImAM, tethI nitya sadAya . . . . . 66 krodhAdi taratamyatA, sAdikanI mAMya; pUrva janma saMskAra te, jIva nityatA tyAMya . . . . . 67 AtmA dravye nitya che, paryAye palaTAya; bALAdi vaya traNyanu, jJAna ekane thAya . . . . . 68 athavA jJAna kSaNikanu, je jANI vadanAra; vadanAro te kSaNika nahi, kara anubhava nirdhAra . . . . . 69 kyAre koI vastuno, kevaLa hoya na nAza; cetana pAme nAza to, kemAM bhaLe tapAsa . . . . . 70 zaMkA ziSya uvAca kartA jIva na karmano, karma ja kartA karma; athavA sahaja svabhAva kAM, karma jIvano dharma . . . . . 71 AtmA sadA asaMga ne, kare prakRti baMdha; athavA Izvara preraNA, tethI jIva abaMdha . . . . . 72 mATe mokSa upAyano, koI na hetu jaNAya; karma taNuM kartApaNuM, kAM nahIM, kAM nahIM jAya . . . . . 73 samAdhAna sadguru uvAca hoya na cetana preraNA, koNa grahe to karma? jaDa svabhAva nahIM preraNA, juo vicAro dharma . . . . . 74

Page #39
I am the Soul 2-35 jo cetana karatuM nathI, nathI thatAM to karma; tethI sahaja svabhAva nahi, temaja nahi jIva dharma . . . . . 75 kevaLa hota asaMga jo, bhAsata tane na kema? asaMga che paramArthathI, paNa nija bhAne tema . . . . . 76 kartA Izvara koI nahi, Izvara zuddha svabhAva; athavA preraka te gaNye, Izvara doSa prabhAva . . . . . 77 cetana jo nija bhAnamAM, kartA Apa svabhAva; varte nahi nija bhAnamAM, kartA karma prabhAva . . . . . 78 zaMkA ziSya uvAca jIva karma kartA kaho, paNa bhoktA nahi soya, zuM samaje jaDa karma ke, phaLa pariNAmI hoya? . . . . . 79 phaLadAtA Izvara gaNye, bhoktApaNuM sadhAya; ema ko IzvarataNuM, IzvarapaNuM ja jAya . . . . . 80 Izvara siddha thayA vinA, jagata niyama nahi hoya; pachI zubhAzubha karmanAM, bhogya sthAna nahIM koya . . . . . 81 samAdhAna sadguru uvAca bhAva karma nija kalpanA, mATe cetana rUpa; jIva vIryanI sphuraNA, grahaNa kare jaDadhUpa . . . . . 82 jhera sudhA samaje nahIM, jIva khAya phaLa thAya; ema zubhAzubha karmarnu, bhoktApaNuM jaNAya . . . . . 83 / eka rAMka ne eka nRpa, e Adi je bheda; kAraNa vinA na kArya te, te ja zubhAzubha vedya . . . . . 84 phaLadAtA IzvarataNI, emAM nathI jarUra; karma svabhAve pariName, thAya bhogathI dUra . . . . . 85 te te bhogya vizeSanAM, sthAnaka dravya svabhAva; gahana vAta che ziSya A, kahI saMkSepe sAva . . . . . 86

Page #40
2-36 I am the Soul zaMkA ziSya uvAca kartA bhoktA jIva ho, paNa teno nahi mokSa, vItyo kALa anaMta paNa, vartamAna che doSa . . . . . 87 zubha kare phaLa bhogave, devAdi gati mAMya; azubha kare narakAdi phaLa, karma rahita na kyAMya . . . . . 88 samAdhAna sadguru uvAca jema zubhAzubha karmapada, jANyAM saphaLa pramANa; tema nivRtti saphaLatA, mATe mokSa sujANa . . . . . 89 vItyo kALa anaMta te, karma zubhAzubha bhAva; teha zubhAzubha chedatAM, upaje mokSa svabhAva . . . . . 90 dehAdika saMyogano, AtyaMtika viyoga; siddha mokSa zAzvata pade, nija anaMta sukhabhoga . . . . . 91 zaMkA ziSya uvAca hoya kadApi mokSapada, nahi avirodha upAya; karmo kALa anaMtanAM, zAthI chedyAM jAya? . . . . . 92 athavA mata darzana ghaNAM, kahe upAya aneka; temAM mata sAco kayo, bane na eha viveka . . . . . 93 kaI jAtimAM mokSa che, kayA veSamA mokSa; eno nizcaya nA bane, ghaNAM bheda e doSa . . . . . 94 tethI ema jaNAya che, maLe nA mokSa upAya; jIvAdi jANyA taNo, zo upakAra ja thAya? . . . . . 95 pAMce uttarathI thayu, samAdhAna sarvAMga; samaju mokSa upAya to, udaya udaya sadbhAgya . . . . . 96 samAdhAna sadguru uvAca pAMce uttarathI thaI, AtmA viSe pratIta; thAze mokSopAyanI, sahaja pratIta e rIta . . . . . 97

Page #41
I am the Soul 2-37 karmabhAva ajJAna che, mokSabhAva nijavAsa; aMdhakAra ajJAna sama, nAze jJAnaprakAza . . . . . 98 je je kAraNa baMdhanA, teha baMdhano paMtha; te kAraNa chedaka dazA, mokSapaMtha bhava aMta . . . . . 99 rAga dveSa ajJAna e, mukhya karmanI graMtha; thAya nivRtti jehathI, te ja mokSano paMtha . . . . . 100 AtmA sat caitanyamaya, sarvAbhAsa rahita; jethI kevaLa pAmie, mokSapaMtha te rIta . . . . . 101 karma anaMta prakAranAM, temAM mukhye ATha; temAM mukhye mohanIya, haNAya te kahuM pATha . . . . . 102 karma mohanIya bheda be, darzana cAritra nAma; haNe bodha vItarAgatA, acUka upAya Ama . . . . . 103 karmabaMdha krodhAdithI, haNe kSamAdika teha; pratyakSa anubhava sarvane, emAM zo saMdeha . . . . . 104 choDI mata darzana taNo, Agraha tema vikalpa; ko mArga A sAdhaze, janma tehanA alpa . . . . . 105 SaTpadanAM SaTprazna teM pUchyAM karI vicAra; te padanI sarvAMgatA, mokSa mArga nirdhAra . . . . . 106 jAti veSano bheda nahi, kahyo mArga jo hoya; sAdhe te mukti lahe, emAM bheda na koya . . . . . 107 kaSAyanI upazAMtatA, mAtra mokSa abhilASa; bhave kheda aMtara dayA, te kahIe jijJAsa . . . . . 108 te jijJAsu jIvane, thAya sadguru bodha; to pAme samakitane, varte aMtara zodha . . . . . 109 mata darzana Agraha taji, varte sadguru lakSa; lahe zuddha samakita te, jemAM bheda na pakSa . . . . . 110 varte nija svabhAvano, anubhava, lakSa, pratIta; vRtti vahe nijabhAvamAM, paramArthe samakita . . . . . 111

Page #42
2-38 I am the Soul vardhamAna samakita thaI, TALe mithyAbhAsa; udaya thAya cAritrano, vItarAga pada vAsa . . . . . 112 kevaLa nija svabhAva-, akhaMDa varte jJAna; kahie kevaLajJAna te, deha chatAM nirvANa . . . . . 113 koTi varSanuM svapna paNa, jAgRta thatAM zamAya; tema vibhAva anAdino, jJAna thatAM dUra thAya . . . . . 114 chUTe dehAdhyAsa to, nahi kartA tuM karma; nahi bhoktA tuM tehano - e ja dharmano marma . . . . . 115 e ja dharmathI mokSa che, tuM cho mokSa svarUpa; anaMta darzana jJAna tuM, avyAbAdha svarUpa . . . . . 116 zuddha, buddha, caitanyaghana, svayaM jyoti sukhadhAma; bIjuM kahie keTaluM? kara vicAra to pAma . . . . . 117 nizcaya sarve jJAnIno, AvI atra samAya; dharI maunatA ema kahI, sahaja samAdhi mAMya . . . . . 118 ziSya bodhabIjanI prApti sadgurunA upadezathI, AvyuM apUrva bhAna; nija pada nija mAMhi lahUM, dUra thayuM ajJAna . . . . . 119 bhAsyuM nija svarUpa te, zuddha cetanArUpa; ajara, amara, avinAzI ne dehAtIta svarUpa . . . . . 120 kartA bhoktA karmano, vibhAva varte jyAMya; vRtti vahI nijabhAvamAM, thayo akartA tyAMya . . . . . 121 athavA nija pariNAma je, zuddha cetanArUpa; kartA-bhoktA tehano, nirvikalpa svarUpa . . . . . 122 mokSa kahyo nija zuddhatA, te pAme te paMtha, samajAvyo saMkSepamAM, sakaLa mArga nirmaMtha . . . . . 123 aho! aho! zrI sadguru, karuNA siMdhu apAra, A pAmara para prabhu karyo, aho! aho! upakAra . . . . . 124

Page #43
I am the Soul 2-39 zuM prabhucaraNa kane dharUM? AtmAthI sau hIna, te to prabhue Apiyo, vartuM caraNAdhIna . . . . . 125 A dehAdI AjathI, varto prabhu AdhIna; dAsa, dAsa, huM dAsa chu, teha prabhuno dIna . . . . . 126 SaT sthAnaka samajAvIne, bhinna batAvyo Apa; myAna thakI taravAravat, e upakAra amApa . . . . . 127 upasaMhAra darzana ghaTe zamAya che, A SaT sthAnaka mAhi, vicAratAM vistArathI, saMzaya rahe na kAI . . . . . 128 AtmabhrAMti sama roga nahIM, sadguru vaidya sujANa, guru AjJA sama pathya nahIM, auSadha vicAra dhyAna . . . . . 129 jo iccho paramArtha to, karo satya puruSArtha, bhava sthiti Adi nAma laI, chedo nahIM AtmArtha . . . . . 130 nizcayavANI sAMbhaLI, sAdhana tajavAM noya, nizcaya rAkhI lakSamA, sAdhana karavAM soya . . . . . 131 naya nizcaya ekAMtathI, AmAM nathI kahela; ekAMte vyavahAra nahIM, banne sAtha rahela . . . . . 132 gacchamatanI je kalpanA, te nahIM sad vyavahAra; bhAna nahIM nija rUparnu, te nizcaya nahi sAra . . . . . 133 AgaLa jJAnI thaI gayA, vartamAnamAM hoya, thAze kALa bhaviSyamAM, mArga bheda nahi koya . . . . . 134 sarva jIva che siddha sama, je samaje te thAya, sadguruAjJA jinadazA, nimitta kAraNa mAMya . . . . . 135 upAdAnanuM nAma laI, e je taje nimitta, pAme nahi siddhatvane, rahe bhrAMtimAM sthita . . . . . 136 mukhathI jJAna kathe ane, aMtara chuTyo na moha, te pAmara prANI kare, mAtra jJAnIno droha . . . . . 137

Page #44
2-40 I am the Soul dayA, zAMti, kSamA, samatA, satya, tyAga, vairAgya; hoya mumukSu ghaTa viSe, eha sadAya sujAgya . . . . . 138 mohabhAva kSaya hoya jyAM, athavA hoya prazAMta; te kahIe jJAnI dazA, bAkI kahIe bhrAMta . . . . . 139 sakala jagata te eMThavata, athavA svapna samAna, te kahie jJAnI dazA, bAkI vAcAjJAna . . . . . 140 sthAnaka pAMca vicArIne, chaThe varte jeha; pAme sthAnaka pAMcamuM, emAM nahi saMdeha . . . . . 141 deha chatAM jenI dazA, varte dehAtIta, te jJAnInA caraNamAM, ho! vaMdana agaNita . . . . . 142

Page #45
Contemplation upon the Self I am the Soul. Chetan is my true original form. I am chetan. The world is inanimate. Chaitanya is the Soul. Soul is itself chaitanya. Chaitanya is my special characteristic... My unique characteristic, . . . which is not to be found in ... Any substance of this world... Other than in me, the soul. I am different from this world... because I am chetan. All the substances visible to the eye are inanimate. They are masses of pudgals. Invisible to the eyes, I am... a mass of energy. All substances are inanimate. This body is inanimate ... the senses are inanimate . . the mind too is inanimate. separate from me. All the inanimate substances are... I am chaitanya, the atma alone... The body is not mine. . . neither do I belong to the body. The senses are not mine... neither do I belong to the senses. The mind is not mine... neither do I belong to the mind. Independent of the body, senses and mind... I am the chaitanya atma. The body, sense and mind... are but media of expressing my chaitanya. The chaitanya manifests itself through the medium of the body; ... that is, it gets recognised. It is recognised through the medium of the senses... through the medium of the mind. But the body is not the Soul. The senses are not the Soul. The mind is not the Soul either. The body is active... because the chetan is merged with the body..

Page #46
Contemplation I am the Soul The senses are active ... because the chetan is merged with the senses. Similarly, since the chetan is merged with the mind, the mind is active. If the chetan were to detach itself ... from the body, senses and mind ... all their activity would cease. The activity that is there ... is that of the chetan. Once the chetan leaves the body ... Neither the body nor the senses can do any thing. Therefore, chetana is the characteristic of atma ... and not that of the body, nor of the senses ... and neither that of the mind. I am the Soul. Chaitanya is my characteristic. Chaitanya is my natural disposition. I want to attain my true original form. I want to enjoy the engrossment in my own bliss. I want to experience the chaitanya. Hence, if I stabilise in my Self ... If I encompass myself within my Self ... forgetting the entire world ... remaining aloof from all the inanimate substances of the world . . . rising above the body, senses and mind, ... I shall be able to believe in, and experience ... the bliss of chetana. Therefore, becoming more engrossed ... For a few moments more, ... Let us contemplate upon the Soul. I am the Soul. I am the Soul. Aum, Shanti! Shanti! Shanti!

Page #47
Param Pujya Pranlalji Maharaj saheb the benevolent Sadgurudev Birth : Veraval, Monday 16.8.1897 Diksha : Thursday 25.2.1920 Nirvana : Wednesday 27.2.1957

Page #48
.

Page #49
Pujya Lalitabai Mahasatiji who gently moulded her disciple Sadhvi Tarulata and guided her through her formative years

Page #50

Page #51
M.A., Ph.D. Pujya Dr. Tarulatabai Mahasatiji MA.. whose discourses were compiled as 'I am the Soul'

Page #52

Page #53
... up on thinking over! The jiva who devotedly pursues the three gems, attains the atma. A jiva, which has attained everything else, does not stabilise until it attains the atma. Attaining everything else leads to momentum, while attaining the atma leads to stability. Atmasiddhi Shastra shows ways of attaining the atma after accepting it. The curious disciple places the doubts about the existence of atma before the Gurudev who, with logical arguments andproofs, proves that it does. Satisfied with the clarification, the disciple's heart is filled with joy. He thinks deeply about the atma. What happens as a result of this thinking is related here in the words of the disciple - AtmAnA astitvanA, Ape kahyA prakAra; Hva datorre, sia per farena .....48 O Gurudev! You have proved the existence of atma in so many ways. After you told me, I have thought upon all these arguments in great depth. I have thought a lot. I have thought again and again. And at the end I felt that it is exactly as you say. Brothers! The all-knowing, omniscient Supreme Soul - Parmatma also tells us that whatever principle we hear or read should be thought over very deeply. It is good that you are interested in listening to the principles and that you like them. But later, only when you do a lot of thinking about them can they be reduced to faith. This is a very important matter that, that principle alone which has been thought over deeply, on which there has been a lot of contemplation, can get established as a faith in the atma and continue to remain there. As and how the contemplation happens, the atma begins to get influenced, and as the influence gets stronger, it establishes forever as a faith in the atma. The other reason why this happens is when there is

Page #54
404 I am the Soul deep thinking about a subject, one has to concentrate well on it. All distractions around get ignored. The mind and intellect get involved in thinking and as such the influence then is very strong. Brothers! We notice that whatever subjects this jiva has deeply dwelt upon, has churned well, their influence is very much established on us even today. Our feelings of attachment and avarice are so strong that they do not break in spite of our best efforts. They are lying in the atma whenever we see. They do not need to be awakened or invoked. Their influence is so strong that it can be likened to the knot on a thin but strong strand of silk thread on which a drop of oil is placed. The knot can never be undone. We have also settled the influences of affected disposition in the atma, with the help of the stickiness of passions. We dabble in affected disposition again and again. We not only indulge in attachment and aversion, but keep looking for more ways of continuing to do so. Since the passion of attachment is lying within, we make a thousand efforts to feed that passion, our thoughts are preoccupied with it, our mind, speech and body have just that activity. In the same way there are the efforts to feed the passion of avarice. Thus the jiva has been nurturing such feelings of l' and 'mine' from infinite time, has been thinking of only that. As such these influences were carried into smaller or bigger life forms wherever the jiva went. I recall an anecdote. We were at Jharia Coal Fields, Bihar in 1969 for the Chaturmas. The nun's residence was in a narrow lane and about 8-10 feet away was an old house with a tiled roof. One morning when I looked out of the window, I saw a crow come with a loaf in its beak. It perched on the tiled roof, looked around to make sure no one saw him, then pressed the loaf in its claw, lifted the round tile with its beak and placed the loaf on the plain tile underneath. Then he covered it up with the round tile. It made sure nobody was watching, and then flew away towards the west. Immediately, another crow, who must

Page #55
I am the Soul 405 have been watching all this, came in from the east, raised the tile and removed the loaf and flew away with it. The crow who had hidden the loaf came again, but it was not there. Brothers! This is an eye-witness account. After having seen it, I felt, "Who could have taught the crow all this? One hides and another steals, these are apparently the influences of the many previous births. Don't you teach your children the same thing? You give more and say, 'Go, pocket it, eat when you have gone out. Don't tell anyone that you were given two chocolates. The other one has been given only one.' At such times the child is happy and you too get elated. But these influences go on settling deeper and deeper in a jiva. They leave an indelible impression on the atma. That is why such influences are visible in all life forms, without anybody teaching or learning them. We are, of course, familiar with such influences, but now we need to absorb the influences of the faith in atma, the faith in the words of Jina. As such influences are not absorbed with sufficent analysis, it does not take long for our faith to get shaken. The roots of faith do not go deep at all. We merely seem to rest our faith on the customs that have been followed by others. If the faith has come with proper understanding, then it remains steadfast even under extremely unfavourable circumstances. The disciple, having been convinced of the existence of atma, has done a deep contemplation over it and is telling the Gurudev, 'O Gurudev! I have thought, and am satisfied. Now I am a believer in the existence of atma. My divine vision is awakening with your invaluable words and unlimited benevolence. So saying, bowing his head at the feet of the Gurudev with gratitude, he says in a choked voice - cha cha padonI mArI aMtara ArAdhanA zAzvata siddhine pamAya . . . mArI aMtara ArAdhanA

Page #56
406 I am the Soul pahelu pada te mAre Atmadeva sat che Ha, ferri, Brig Fagy ...(?) cetananA camakAre comera vyApato G1541 TOT 154 ... 4rt sie 311... The unlimited faith towards the Gurudev has opened the doors of the disciple's heart. In his mind are more doubts about the atma. These he states now - bIjI zaMkA thAya tyAM, AtmA nahIM avinAza; Tetorit 57457, de facut Tyt.....fo The disciple is studious. He is aware of the principles believed in other faiths. And hence there is now a new doubt in his mind. The second statement was - 'atma is permanent. But the disciple says, 'Gurudev! I cannot believe that atma is indestructible. I have accepted that atma exists, but the atma gets created when a body is created and gets destroyed along with the body.' In an excellent treatise 'Visheshavashyak Mahabhashya' (vizeSAvazyaka mahAbhASya) composed by Acharya Jinabhadragani Kshamashramana, there is a chapter - Ganadharavada. In that are mentioned the doubts raised by the eleven Ganadharas of Bhagwan Mahaveer, on account of their not having understood the Vedas before being ordained, and the clarifications offered by the Prabhu. There is a detailed discussion over the doubt that jiva and body are one, raised by the third Ganadhara, namely Vayubhuti, to which the Prabhu has offered a clarification. The doubt is that the elements earth, water, fire and air get together to form the body and therein is formed a substance called atma. Just as the flower of dhatura, jaggery, water and so on are not intoxicants by nature, but when they are mixed the intoxicating substance is produced. Similarly although the four elements earth etc., do not possess the life energy, yet when they get together the life energy is created in them.

Page #57
I am the Soul 407 Indeed, the various substances that together make liquor do not seem to possess any intoxicating quality, yet that quality is produced in them when they are mixed, it remains in the form of that quality for a certain period and then dies out. Similarly although the four elements do not have any life energy in them. their coming together generates life and it dies out after a certain time. This is the belief of the followers of Charvak. They do not believe in the presence of life in the elements. If they did, it would amount accepting the existence of an independent soul. Therefore, they say that the soul is created with the interaction of the elements and also gets destroyed. In Atmasiddhi Shastra too, the disciple raises the same doubt, that with the interaction of the body, i.e. after the body is created a soul gets created in it and dies out after the death of the body. But that is not the truth. Even while clarifying the doubts of Vayubhuti Ganadhara, Prabhu has said - 'If you do not believe in the presence of life energy in the elements, then even their interaction is not going to generate life. The reason why an intoxicating quality develops in the liquor that is brewed with the dhatura seed, jaggery etc., is that those ingredients which go on to make liquor also possess the intoxicating quality. We begin to feel drowsy immediately after taking rich food, what is that? That food has a certain type of intoxicant and hence it has that effect. Just as we get oil from sesame, because there is oil in every seed. Had it not been so, there would be no oil from a group of seeds too. There is no oil in a grain of sand, so whatever amount of sand you grind, no oil can be produced from it. Thus since there is no life in the elements like earth etc., there cannot be a creation of life through their interaction. Therefore, lifechaitanya is an independent substance.' This is how Prabhu Mahaveer resolved the doubt in Vayubhuti Ganadhar. *.

Page #58
408 I am the Soul Due to such belief of Charvak, there are many people even today who believe that the foetus in the womb of a mother does not have life till it is three months, only later does life come in. This a very wrong notion. If there were no life in the foetus it would not grow at all. Where there is growth there is life. At the very beginning there is the arrival of life and then begins the shaping up of the body. The moment the jiva arrives in the mother's womb, it attracts the atoms and gets busy in making up the body. Therefore, even in a three month old foetus there is jiva - life. So first there is jiva and then the creation of the body. The theories of the Charvak philosophy appear to be playing in the mind of the disciple. Hence he is not willing to believe this and says that the atma is created with the body and gets extinguished with the body's death. There is also another doubt about the eternity of the atma. That is - athavA vastu kSaNika che, kSaNe kSaNe palaTAya; e anubhavathI paNa nahIM, AtmA nitya jaNAya Under the influence of the Buddhist philosophy, the disciple is willing to believe that along other things atma is also momentary. He says that all the things in the world are momentary and we see them changing every moment. Thus atma too has to get destructed every moment. Hence atma cannot be eternal. 61 - Every substance is undergoing a change, call it a state - z - or an alternate - - One is sthoola paryaya - - i.e. a macro alternate and the other is a sookshma paryaya - sUkSma paryAya - i.e the micro alternate. In the affected dispositional form the atma is in the human body which is a sthoola paryaya - something which will remain in human form for a given number of years. The change in the state of the body that is occurring every

Page #59
I am the Soul 409 moment, which results in the body being a baby, a youth and an old man etc., is the sookshma paryaya. In every substance, with every passing moment, a new state gets created and then destroyed. It is due to this that a new thing becomes old and ultimately gets destroyed after becoming deteriorated. Today you construct a very strong new house, later with every passing moment it turns old and its states go on changing. A 50 or maybe a 100-200 years later it decays and gets destroyed. Thus in all the substances of this world there is a destruction on at every moment. We have seen, and are still seeing, many substances getting destroyed. The disciple says atma is also a substance. In the atma too the various states arise and abate. So the atma too gets destroyed once and hence it is not eternal. Such is the doubt about the eternity of the atma in the mind of the disciple. He is inspired to believe. 1) that the atma is born and that it dies along with the body, and 2) that like all other things atma is also momentary. Now he wants an explanation from the Gurudev. How the Gurudev resolves this doubt will be told later..

Page #60
Body is but a coincidence ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems can be done only by an eligible jiva. In the material world, if nothing is achievable without eligibility, then in the spiritual world, the chances of achieving something without it are none. A tremendous effort is necessary to achieve eligibility. One who does not make an effort, cannot get the spiritual accomplishment. Yes, in the material world, one may get a lot owing to earlier efforts in the form of punya. If a child born in the household of a millionaire gets sweets and fruits to eat without doing anything, it is by virtue of his earlier punya. But spiritual accomplishment is not the result of punya. In this field the earlier punya only gets you eligibility, makes the circumstances conducive for devoted practice, but after attaining these, the jiva has to make a tremendous effort until the twelfth gunasthana is reached. Therefore, in the spiritual field if the jiva lies dormant it can get nowhere. A Sanskrit verse says - udyamena hi siddhayanti kAryANi na manorathaiH / na hi suptasya siMhasya pravizanti mukhe mRgAH // Every work is accomplished with a tremendous effort. Merely by building castles in the air, no work can get accomplished. If the King of animals - Lion is sleeping, no animal is going to enter its mouth by itself. That is to say, even the Lion has to make an effort to fill its stomach. Work is successful only with effort. Greater the task, equally great has to be the effort. Kabir has said - for CTA FA uigui, rito... Whoever discovered the truth, has delved deep into it, i.e. they could attain the atma only after going deep into it and after a research. Brothers! One doesn't get anything by fishing in shallow waters, but shells and conches. Man must know that, to

Page #61
I am the Soul 411 get pearls, it is necessary to risk your life and go touch the bed of the deep seas. Only those who put their lives at stake and play in deep waters can get the valuable pearls. sAgara kinAre UbhI vicAruM motI haze kyAM jaLanA udaramAM, kSaNa eka doDI mUThI bharANI, motI nahIM hA! raMgIna chIpalAM, hA! vyartha doDI pAmI na motI; sAgara jaLe na kadI hoya motI, pUro vacana tyAM AvyA smaraNamAM, UMDe jo UtarIza pAmIza motI. To attain the soul too, an extremely tremendous effort is necessary. It doesn't suffice to perform a little penance and sacrifice at the superficial level. That amounts to fishing in shallow waters. It is necessary to reach deep into the depths of the Self and shake it up. Constant contemplation alone can enable the learning of principles. Here the disciple has done deep thinking. There is a great curiosity in him for learning the principles and therefore an effort has arisen from within him. Foremost in it is the total dedication at the feet of the Sadguru. Then there is the humility and the urge to know as seen in the starkly true questions. He is not asking haphazard questions, but they are doubts which are substantiated by logic and proofs. Therefore he is saying that body and the soul are one and the same. The principle by name atma is accepted but its not as if it is separate from the body. For in every atom of the body there is its own all pervading life energy; if anything happens in any part of the body there is an immediate sensation, no part is without sensation; therefore, soul is not separate from the body. Since there is a creation and destruction of the body, there has to be a creation and destruction of the soul too. Since all the

Page #62
412 I am the Soul substances of the universe are momentary, the soul too has to be momentary. The disciple says, 'Well, I accept the soul now, but I cannot accept that it is eternal.' Gurudev too is quietly inspiring the disciple to come out with the curiosity about the second statement after having cleared his doubts about the first and after the faith in the disciple's heart has strengthened. After strengthening the foundation, he is allowing the superstructure to gain momentum. With these feelings, Gurudev offers the clarification of the doubt - deha mAtra saMyoga che, vaLI jaDarUpI dRzya; TAHT rufe tu, atat 31747 aga.....? O Disciple! You say, the atma is created along with the creation of the body and gets destroyed along with the destruction of the body. But it is necessary to first understand what a body is? Body is a substance produced out of the interaction of atoms. If the human body were to be considered, the jiva that arrives in the womb of the mother first takes in blood and semen, which are poudgalik substances. And thereafter, with its own ability, it processes this intake into pudgal, body, senses, respiration, language, mind and such energy forms. This is called "paryapti'. The jiva has brought along its earlier karmas, among them one is called paryapti karma. The strength of this karma is that it provides the jiva with the energy to sustain for a period of six months in whatever species it enters. Thus right from the moment of conception this energy begins to collect. A human body gets all these energies. The atma enters the womb as an atma. Only later does it keep on attracting various types of atoms to convert into a body form for itself. What a massive body it creates in the time-span of nine months! Even after birth, the atma attracts smaller and larger groups of atoms rampant in the atmosphere. Whatever solids and liquids

Page #63
I am the Soul 413 it consumes are also groups of pudgalas. Thus the atma forms its own body with the interaction of pudgalas. The transition of atoms also results from interaction. The atom by itself is sat, i.e. it is a substance with existence. Therefore there is a constant transition going on in it. In Tattvartha Sutra, it is said - utpAdavyayadhrauvyayuktaM sat What is sat is eternal and in undergoes the transitions of creation and destruction. The presence of waxy and dry qualities in the atoms enable two atoms to meet and become bi-atom - auch -, and three atoms to meet and become tri-atom. Thus numerous, innumerable and infinite atoms meet with each other and then disintegrate. This transition is always on. Thus the body taken by a jiva is the result of the interaction of atoms. In another way, the meaning of sanyog - #21 -, interaction - is that the atma is residing in sanyog sambandha - interactive relation with the body. Relation is of two types - one tadatmya and the other sanyog. Tadatmya Sambandh is the inability of one to exist without the other. Like smoke - if there is fire only then there is smoke. Where there is no fire, there is no smoke. Smoke is not possible without fire. Therefore, the relation of smoke with fire is inseparable - avinabhava sambandh or tadatmya sambandh. But the relation of the body and soul is not such. It is not that the body will be there only if there is the atma. We have seen a body without the atma, i.e. a dead body, a carcass. There, there is a body but no atma. In the same way, it is also possible that there is atma and no body, in the Siddha state. Therefore between the atma and the body, there is not an avinabhava sambandh, but only sanyog sambandh. Sanyog sambandh is the

Page #64
414 I am the Soul merging through an effort or effortlessly. Where there is sanyog, i.e. union, there is also viyogi.e. separation. Thus Gurudev, while explaining the form of the body to the disciple, says that the body in only in interactive relation - sanyog. Further, body is inanimate, i.e it has no chetan or life energy. Besides the qualities of the inanimate such as colour, smell, taste and touch are all noticed in the body. From uni-sensory - ekendriya - to penta-sensory - panchendriya, all bodies have these qualities of colour etc. The pudgala atoms are inanimate, therefore the body made from them is also inanimate. Body has a form. It has some form or the other. It can be seen. Whatever we see are all bodies. Jiva is not visible. Even when we look at ants and insects, we do not say these are jivas. We refer to them as bodies. Body is visible. That is to say, it can be seen by others. The atma sees the body, for knowing and seeing is the true disposition of the atma. Therefore, atma sees every body. But nobody can see the atma. Thus body is the subject of vision. If atma is the knower then body is the known. Gurudev tells the disciple, 'The body is a sanyog sambandh. It is inanimate. It is large in its true disposition. It has a form and can be seen with the eyes. Now, if along with the creation of the body, atma - which is of a diametrically opposite quality, is getting created in it and also getting destroyed with the destruction of the body, then I ask you, O Disciple! - adi gryfa cate, chat 37747 094? - Who is capable of experiencing the creation and destruction of the life energy? The creation and destruction of the body can be observed. But who can know the atma that is generated in the body? The body cannot say that this atma is now generated. For the body is inanimate. It does not have the quality of knowledge. In fact, when it does not know of its own generation, how can it ever

Page #65
I am the Soul 415 know about the generation of the atma? If you are saying that - atma has itself recognised its own generation - then that is also incorrect, for according to you atma is not permanent. And if the atma materialises from the generation of the life energy, it will be proved to be permanent. What holds good about generation is also true of destruction. The life energy can know about the loss of the body, but body cannot know of the loss of the atma. That is to say, there is nobody who knows of the generation and destruction of the atma. Therefore, O Disciple! Nobody has seen the atma generating along with the body and getting destroyed along with the destruction of the body.' Furnishing the reason for this, Sri Sadguru says - jenA anubhava vazya e, utpanna layanuM jJAna; thI judA vinA, thAya na keme bhAna . 63 The body being inanimate cannot know of the generation and destruction of the atma. Now, O Disciple! If you tell me, 'Atma's true disposition is Knowledge according to you, and therefore, it has learnt of its own birth and death', even that sounds impossible. There was no atma before it was born. Now, if it were getting created, would it know of its creation as and how its creation progressed? That cannot happen! And in spite of accepting that it does, who then knows of the destruction? When the knower itself is destroyed, it exists no more, then who will say, 'I have got destroyed'? Therefore, it is not logical to say that atma has itself learnt of its generation and destruction. Therefore, O Disciple! The one who knows can know only if it is separate from the substance that is known. Everything other than its own self is all jneya - knowable. Therefore, to know of the inanimate body, the knower has to be separate from it, and that is how it is. In Srimadji's own words -

Page #66
416 I am the Soul "That in whose experience exists the knowledge of generation and destruction of the body; if that is not independent of the body, then in no way can it know of the generation and destruction of the body. In other words, the one who knows of the generation and destruction of something, is always separate from it, for it does not happen to be the generation and destruction, but only its knower. Therefore, how can the two be the same?' Why! Many a time a person on the death-bed can feel the impending departure. He will even say that, "That's it, now I shall be leaving. I shall not remain beyond such and such a time.' Our own revered grand Guruniji Motibai Mahasatiji had such a foreboding. The day she passed away, she had said in advance, 'I shall be departing at 2:20 this night'. She even took the death vow in the evening. She was even talking until 5-7-10 past 2:00 a.m. When there were just a few minutes left for 2:20, she even asked what the time was, and promptly at 2:20 a.m. she left the body. Such awareness comes only to a few. But after leaving the body, it does not say, 'I am now destroyed'. Of course, if one has developed avadhijnana and jatismaran, one may know when in the previous births one entered and left the various bodies or what body and when one will enter and leave in future. But the atma can know only because it is separate from the body. Here, the Gurudev is explaining to the disciple, 'O Disciple! That, whose generation and destruction are to be learnt, can be so learnt only if the knower is independent. And since nobody can know of the generation and destruction of the atma, it is true that the atma is neither generated nor can get destroyed. Therefore, it is eternal. Thus Gurudev has clarified the disciple's doubt about the eternity of atma. Further, to remove the doubt from its roots altogether the Gurudev offers more foolproof arguments.

Page #67
... hence, it is always eternal The pursuit of three gems enables the atma or life energy to know itself as separate from the inanimate and to experience the bliss of the Self. Knowledge is an exclusive quality of the chaitanya. And that is why chaitanya is chaitunya. The utma has to experience the Self with its own knowledge. This knowledge is not the knowledge of some book, it is not figurative, nor something that was heard or read, but the power of sensation that rests in the atma through which the atma has to experience the chaitanya. A jiva with samyak darshan does experience the Self, but this feeling is intermittent; it is there sometimes and not there at other times. In the progressing state of elevation of the soul, when the jiva reaches the kevaljnana stage, this intermittent feeling of bliss becomes continuous and then the jiva remains in it forever. This continuous feeling of bliss is possible only if atma is eternal. If atma were momentary, or subject to destruction, it could not have a continuous feeling at all. The Arihant Parmatma accepted such a continuous feeling and then preached. He says, We and all those jivas who have attained Siddhi, have experienced the eternal bliss of the atma and even now are experiencing the same. This is the proof of the eternity of the atma'. In Atmasiddhi Shastra, the disciple has raised a doubt about the eternal nature of atma. The benevolent Gurudev is explaining to the disciple. He is trying to prove the eternal nature of atma with various substantiated arguments. In the next gatha the same essence is explained. Here we may feel that the subject is being repeated. The question occurs as to why a self-realised great man like Srimadji is repeating the same thing again and again.

Page #68
418 I am the Soul He knew that the people were likely to doubt the eternal nature of the atma. Many would say, "Who knows whether there is a next birth? Is there going to be a birth after death?' People would say, 'There are no such things as heaven or hell. It is just that man has been tempted with heaven so that he does good karmas, works for others' well being and lives a life of good conduct. And if the unbearable sorrows of hell have been described, it is to throw the fear of hell into his mind so that he does not sin or get into material attachment, does not hurt anybody in anyway, avoids bad conduct. The good men have just created the ideas of heaven and hell; in fact, heaven and hell are both right here?. If some person is sorrowful in all ways, the body afflicted with terrible diseases, mental tensions, non-cooperation by family members, has got into financial losses, there is no status in the society - in such a situation when a person is bothered by troubles from all sides, we say, 'He is suffering hell in his life. Look, hell is right here.' But those who believe so need to think that there are many people who are absolutely degraded, sinful, of loose character, addicted - complete in all respects; many others are put to great misery because of them, and yet such a person keeps enjoying all sorts of material joys. Would he not have to suffer for the sins he is committing? So some arrangement is already made for such suffering Brothers! Whenever and whatever Karmas a jiva does, with whatsoever feelings, their results - where, when, how much and of what sort - are decided simultaneously. It is not as if at first all karmas are accumulated and then when the day of reckoning arrives, the Lord decides where the jiva has to go and what he has to suffer. Here, every moment is a moment of reckoning, at every moment there is bondage of karmas and at every moment their results are determined.

Page #69
I am the Soul 419 So, heaven and hell, according to the karma, are also confirmed. Perhaps you may not be believing heaven or hell as a place, but you do know that you have yourself established such a massive machinery for some body who commits a major crime - police, jail, court, prosecutor, judge, hearing and judgement! Tell me, don't you have to follow this your very own system, as laid down? And is the convict taken to the jail for undergoing the sentence or is he kept at home and sentenced? It is not so! A person identified as a convict in the eyes of the society, has to serve time in the cell, and if he is sentenced to be hanged, he has to go through it, there is no choice. Brothers! It is the same with the Karmas done by the atma. To suffer those, there are places like naraka (hell), nigoda and tiryancha where one has to suffer a life form. The jiva has to go there. In the same way, one who has punya karma to his credit, has to either be born in heaven or as a human, where he experiences joy. All this can happen, only if atma is eternal. The reason why Srimadji repeats this matter in his gathas, is that humans are not accepting the eternal nature of atma. By proving the eternal nature of atma to them, he is trying to raise the belief that the self is eternal atma. To again prove the eternal nature of atma, Srimadji says - je saMyogo dekhiye, te te anubhava dRzya; 35957 the weiteit, 3T4 FARA .....88 All the sanyogs like de ha - the body, in the world are visible. That is to say, they are such that they can be seen and they are substances known to the atma which is experience itself. But atma is not something which can be created from any sanyog. Where there is atma there is growth. A small seed can sprout into a sapling and grow into a tree by absorbing substances from the soil. There is life in the seed therefore, it can create a body through an interaction - sanyog - with nearby substances. But

Page #70
420 I am the Soul whatever number of inanimate things getting together cannot result in creation of life. In a Laboratory many chemicals can be put together to form another compound that is, a substance changes form. But it has never been heard that science had put together certain things and created life from it. Why! Even if you consider the tube-baby, then life appears and stabilises in it only when semen and ova are brought together by creating the same situation as is required for the jiva to appear in the mother's womb. Life cannot be created by somebody's making. A small seed grows into a banyan tree. But if equipment invented by science were to be buried in soil for thousands of years, they would turn to dust, but there could never be a fraction of a sprout in them. Thus jiva cannot be created through sunyog or interaction. Of course, a situation conducive for the arrival of the atma may be readied. Wherein the atma makes an entry. Just as in the faeces and urine that is discarded from the human body, within 48 minutes, life begins to appear. That is, the situation becomes conducive for 14 types of summurchchim jivas to be born in, and hence the moment a sanyog is available these jivas are born in it and also die in it. But it is not that a new atma is created out of such sanyog. Indeed the jiva can know of all these sanyogs. It can also know of their transformation. But itself cannot be created out any sort of sanyog. This is the proof of its eternal nature. In this regard Srimadji says - jaDathI cetana Upaje, cetanathI jaDa thAya; patywa olsa, Radia M4 .....84 Never until now has anybody experienced that a mixing of several inanimate things has led to the creation of an animate and in the same way an inanimate out of the animate.

Page #71
I am the Soul As mentioned earlier, it is possible to obtain the apparatus in which an atma could come and be produced. If the birth has to be in the form of a human, then the apparatus required is the mother's womb, semen and ova - jiva may take birth in them. But there cannot be a new production of chetan from jada (animate from inanimate). Today science has made the 'robot', where all the organs and limbs of a human were placed. It was made auto-mobile. It was made to work much more than a human body. But there was one shortcoming left over - life could not be placed in it! Even as the inanimate is eternal in nature in its atomic form, science could change its form, but it can not only not create life but it is incapable of even changing its form. 421 Brothers! Just consider. In your own houses there are innumerable small or big inanimate things. Have your ever seen any such inanimate thing coming to life and moving-walkingtalking like you? Of course, in certain things insects or life may be born, but that is because a conducive situation has been found, as explained earlier. But you have never heard of your cupboard, lying for years at home, taking the form of a human or some such life. In the same way, it is never noticed that chetan - animate has itself got converted to inanimate. Yes it does seem, when a human or some animal, bird or insect dies and its body is lying about, that some time back this was alive and moving and now it has become inanimate. But it is not so. It has not become inanimate, it has remained inanimate. The life animate that was in it has left. That is why the inanimate body is lying there. The animate and the inanimate have separated. Broadly speaking the inanimate substance can be made out of the joining of atoms. But the basic form of the inanimate is the micro atom. Science has made many discoveries, it has measured the strengths of the inanimate and used them, but it has not been able to create a single atom. It just cannot. Science

Page #72
422 I am the Soul also accepts that in the universe matter is indestructible. Animate and inanimate both are in the form of energy. Their existence in Nature is as self, naturally. Both those energies undergo modifications, but they are never totally destroyed nor can be created new. We can be responsible for the changing of the form of the inanimate, but we cannot create the inanimate in its basic form. Just as a cotton fabric - first it was in the form of a plant; cotton was derived from its fruit, out of that the yarn and from that came the cloth. If somebody were to call our clothes as a plant, it would sound very amusing. But truly its first form was a plant and now it has changed form to cloth. So we were able to change its form but we have not been able to create the atom. Therefore, there cannot be animate created from inanimate and vice versa. Both substances have an independent existence and it is prepared to remain so always. Now further establishing the eternal nature of the asanyogi atma, with more arguments, the Gurudev says - koI saMyogothI nahIM, jenI utpatti thAya; ETT TT sui, asit FARE HERE .....8EUR Body is created out of interactive substances - sanyogi padartha. The atma develops the body by absorbing infinite groups of atoms. Later too, to maintain this body, it keeps absorbing more atoms through food and through the follicles on the body. Thus body and such substances are created out of the sanyogs - interactions. But the life force - the chaitanya atma is not born out of any such interaction. This has been told in these gathas. As a rule, what is created can be destroyed. What cannot be created cannot be destroyed either. We have seen the creation and destruction of things visible to our eyes. However strong a thing may be it does get transformed after some time. If it is

Page #73
I am the Soul 423 strong then it remains the same for a longer time, but there is certainly a limit. In today's wonders of the world there are trees which are old as 200 or 500 years. Why! The Pyramids are there for such a long time. The majestic idol of Bhagawan Bahubali is also standing for over 1,000 years. But do you have a record of some thing that is as old as a 100,000 years or 10 million years and remaining even now? Of course, parts of human or animal bodies are found but they do have a time limit. Their time can also be ascertained. Thus the things in the world are born out of interaction and they also get destroyed. But has any scientist or some great man ever found parts of an atma from somewhere? Has anybody found them? No! So the very fact that the atma does not get changed over to some other form or into some parts, is the proof of its eternal nature. Until now, Gurudev told us about the aspects of creation and destruction, and the eternal nature of atma. Further on, he analyses how the eternal nature, of the atma which has adopted to a body, can be proved.

Page #74
The influences of previous birth ... This pursuit of three gems, is a supporting means for the siddhi - accomplishment, that is happening due to the eternal nature of the atma. Moksa is valuable, so also devoted pursuit is valuable only because the atma is eternal. In the Agamas, a lot has been told about the importance of devoted pursuit, about the greatness of the jivas in devoted practice, and the siddhi attained at the end of the pursuit has been mentioned as the supreme goal. The background of all these encompasses the eternal nature of atma. The tremendous effort of Dharma for the attainment of permanent and infinite bliss is made because atma is eternal. Why else would the path of devoted practice and the Dharmakshetra come to exist? The purpose of the doubts and their clarifications in Atmasiddhi Shastra is to highlight the belief in the Jain tradition that the ultimate state of the atma is the supreme soul - the parmatma state, which can be attained by all jivas. This belief is not merely oral, intellectual or imaginary; infinite number of jivas who have attained this supreme state are even today experiencing the eternal true disposition of the self. There are two dispositions of the jiva - one is the true natural disposition of the self, and the other is the affected disposition. The affected disposition that results in a body of mass, does not remain for a long time; it does get transformed. Until such time as the atma, reacting in its own true natural disposition, is on the path of progress and has not yet reached the state of complete and total progress, there are bound to be both heeyaman (waning) and vardhaman (waxing) results. These continue right until the eleventh gunasthana. But once that stage is passed and Veetaraagata - that is total absence of passions, which is the true natural disposition of the self, is attained, there is no instability, there is no heeyaman result. Then there is only a

Page #75
I am the Soul permanence in that state. Thus the state of true natural disposition is also eternal. If we were to consider another angle, then the true form of the atma is knowledge. This attribute of knowledge is also eternal. As a result of this attribute of knowledge, all jivas have the ability to know and sense or feel. The attribute of knowledge in all jivas, from uni-sensory to penta-sensory, is always functional. We have seen insects like ants, flies and mosquitoes suffer with agony. From this we can deduce that they are able to sense sorrow. This sensitivity is not available to inanimate things. for there is no attribute of knowledge in them. 425 The sensation that occurs on account of the attribute of knowledge, is on all three planes of body, mind and spirit. We all experience that we have felt both happiness and sorrow of the body and mind, but we have not known spiritual sensation. So long as Right Faith (Samyag Darshan) is not attained, the Jiva can recognise the sensation of only body and mind, but once he attains bheda-vijnana he begins to believe in the bliss of the true form of the self- atma, experiences the intoxication of the bliss of the Self. This is the sensation of spiritual bliss. In the same way, spiritual sorrow can also be felt! How is that? If the true nature of the soul is happiness and only happiness, how can there be a sensation of sorrow? Look! A jiva has attained samakit - equanimity, and is enjoying the joy of the atma. He is also on the path of progressive graduation of the soul through devoted practice. But such a jiva has the urge to progress more. If, in spite of a tremendous effort, progress is not attained, then there is a grief in the soul. If the jiva is at the fourth gunasthana and cannot reach the sixth or seventh gunasthana then there is grief in the soul. For those who have reached there, not reaching the twelfth gunasthana causes grief. This grief that remains is the sensation of spiritual sorrow..

Page #76
426 I am the Soul The first Ganadhar of the Lord, Shri Gautamswami had experienced such a sorrow. Nine other ganadhars, much younger than him, who had received their lessons from him and many of his disciples attained omniscience and then proceeded to moksa while he was stuck in this false state. This sorrow he has expressed several times. He asks the Lord, "O Lord! Why do I not have omniscience?" This is the highest grade of the sensation of spiritual sorrow. The sensory power of the atma works on all three - body, mind and soul - grounds. Jiva is constant as a substance, it is constant in the state of its true form, it is constant in its virtue of knowledge. It is constant by itself, and its virtues are also constant. Gurudev has proved to us the constant nature of the jiva. Now the jiva repeatedly goes through the cycle of life and death and notices a variety there, yet it is a proof of the constant. Gurudev, while trying to tell us about this, says - krodhAdi taratamyatA, sarpAdikanI mAMya; ya na itara, vita Fretat i ..... 69 A great variety is visible among the small and large jivas living on the canvas of the Universe. The course (gati) of life is different. Some are in Tiryancha and others are in the Manushya. The deva and naraki jivas are not visible here. The type (jati) is different - some are uni-sensory, some others bi-sensory, trisensory, quad-sensory or penta-sensory. The state is also different. Some have a long life, others have a short one. Each one has a different form, colour, shape, and variety. All this is externally different, visible as a difference from the bodily viewpoint. In the same way, if we were to consider the mind - the true nature - the influences, they too are various. Some have a broad mind, others have a narrow one. Some have a Satvik mind, others

Page #77
I am the Soul 427 have Rajasi or Tamasi. Some have a simple mind, others have a materialistic one. Thus it is possible to find a great variety of minds. Similarly some have a very fierce nature, some less fierce and others have a calm one. Some are greedy, some scheming, some untruthful while others are pure and dispassionate. Some have negative while others have civilised influences. All this is apparent while observing every individual human, animal or bird. So naturally the question arises - how is that? In spite of all being human as humans are, or in the same way all being animal as animals are, why should there be this difference? Why is the snake - poisonous, tiger - cruel, cheetah - violent, pigeon - scared, and cow - timid? Similarly, why is there so much difference in, say, four off-springs of the same parents? Science searches for the answer to these questions. And, of course, the child does have the character of the parents, their nature, appearance, colour and so on. But that is so far as the similarity with the parents goes. But what is the reason for that which is in the child and not in the parents? To this science has no answer. Doctors also admit that all this happens naturally. But what is Nature? And why did it do this? What was Nature's intention in creating such a variation between two blood brothers? Science is mum. But the Karma Philosophy in Jainism offers an answer to this. No two jivas' karmas are ever identical. Wherever and whatever atmosphere or circumstances a jiva gets, it survives accordingly. And there is bondage of such karmas. Even under similar circumstances, a jiva continues to bind karma in accordance with its own ability. Two children born from the same mother's womb have varying temperaments. They both may have been tied up in some specific relations with each other and with the parents, in previous births, but their karmas were acquired independently. And these karmas become an influence and get attached to a jiva. Hence, the jiva carries them along into

Page #78
428 I am the Soul the next birth, where as they rise, they influence the jiva's nature and temperament. Whatever influences we see in this birth are by far the ones carried forward from the previous birth. Some of the influences are generated from the atmosphere here. But such atmosphere is also because of the karmas of previous births. The type of karmas decides the type of atmosphere available to one here and therefore, only such influences occur here too. Another aspect: A perfectly healthy mother gives birth to a sickly baby. Science searches for an answer to this. If it does not find in the mother, it leaves this to God. But let us consider why this could happen. Sometimes the baby comes with a serious illness. It needs to be operated upon within three days. Then, Brothers! We begin to feel, "Oh, how sad! Poor Baby! Just born, what sins could it have committed to suffer in such a way?" And truly, the baby has done nothing up on coming here. Its mind, speech and body are so undeveloped that it cannot commit a sin. Then what really happened? Intellect cannot offer a solution to this riddle. There are two things to it: Either this jiva wherever it was in the previous birth was suffering from this sort of a disease. Before the karmas were worn out, the lifeline ended. It died there and carried the illness along with it here. As such it looked sickly the moment it was born. Or else, it has brought its karmas along. Those karmas arose soon after the birth, and there is no escaping their suffering. Whatever a jiva does, those influences are etched on to the atma. The influences so etched, arise in this birth. Let us think! What all did we have to learn after birth, and what did we start doing without any training? Broadly, the bodily activities like sitting, standing, walking, talking - all were learnt upon training. But who taught getting angry, acting stubborn, developing likesdislikes, realising the need for taking food and such? Did the

Page #79
I am the Soul 429 mother say, "Son! If you are hungry then begin crying, only then will you get food!" No, on the contrary, the child taught the mother that when I cry you better understand that I am either hungry or I have some hurt in the body!' We have come in with such influences. Why! Have you seen little pups of a dog? Even they start barking up on seeing a stranger? Who taught them to? Who taught the snake to hiss? Thus whatever specialities we see in all animals are because of the influences that are retained within. A seed sown into the earth, starts absorbing nutrients from the soil, the moment it is in the soil, and it goes on doing so incessantly. We all know the result - a small banyan seed raises a giant banyan tree. And, not just one! It creates many banyan trees so that it becomes difficult to say which was the original. How did this happen? The tremendous sense of absorbing food in the seed developed and this was created. Thus in the living creation of this whole world, it can be seen that whatever a jiva has brought along and as a result of which whatever variety is apparent in it, is all because of influences of the past births. Through this gatha, Gurudev is trying to make the disciple understand - "O Child! The differences visible in all the jivas are the influences of the past births. It is proven therefore, that this is not its first birth. The jiva has taken birth in various species earlier before coming here. Now, if there was a past birth and its influences have been carried forward here, then it means to say that the soul, which is now residing in this body, is the same soul which was residing in the body of previous birth. If the soul were not the same in both the births, with whom could the influences travel? For, one soul does not suffer for the karmas of another. Whatever it does, goes with it and that is suffered.

Page #80
430 I am the Soul The body of the previous birth has not come along. It was destroyed. But even after the destruction of the body, the atma has remained. Therefore, it has taken this birth along with those influences. It is thus established that atma is eternal - constant, indestructible. Without the constant nature of atma, all this is not possible. Now how Gurudev presents more logic while proving the eternal nature of atma, will be dealt with later.

Page #81
Atma is eternal as substance ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems, enables the experience of the true form of atma and stabilises in the eternal true disposition. In Atmasiddhi Shastra, Gurudev has so far offered many arguments that go to prove the eternal nature of atma, to clarify the doubts of the disciple. Even now there is a doubt in the disciple's mind. If all things are momentary, then the atma too has to be momentary. For atma is a thing. Whether you call the atma a thing, or a substance or matter or element - all are but synonyms. Therefore here atma has been called a thing which is momentary Keeping the philosophical thinking of Jainism in view, Gurudev offers a clarification to this doubt - AtmA dravye nitya cheparyAye palaTAya; aifa au touj, F11 Pantera .....86 Atma is a substance - dravya. The characteristic of dravya is sat (FT). Truly, dravya is made up of utpad, vyaya and dhrouvya. The arising of a paryaya - transition - in the atma is utpad; the destruction of that paryaya - abating - is vyaya and the remaining of the atma in its own true form while being in both these states is dhrouvya. Dhruvata is permanence. The remaining of the substance in itself, in its own true form is stability. Whatever be the number of paryayas that extend and abate in the atma, it does not change. It remains as it is. That which has been subsisting from infinite time, that which will subsist for infinite time in future and that, which is subsisting at present and yet remains absolutely unaltered, is dravya - substance. Let us understand this with the example of gold. Gold, being formed in to various shapes, is dravya - the substance and the

Page #82
432 I am the Soul various shapes are paryaya - transition. The making of an ornament from gold is the creation of a transition - paryaya - in the form of ornament. Later when the ornament is melted and recast into a new shape, it is the destruction of the earlier shape and creation of another. But in either states, the gold has remained the same. Although the ornaments were converted, the gold in them did not change. That is its permanence. While defining dravya - substance - in another way, it has been said - guNa paryAyavat dravyam / That which is dependent on characteristic - guna - and modification - paryaya - is dravya - substance. The indestructible quality that remains always with the substance - dravya - is called its guna - characteristic. And the change of states that occurs from time to time in the dravya is the modification - paryaya. Modification is of both dravya and guna. Modification keeps on happening, but neither substance nor characteristic changes. Just as water is a dravya. The ripples that arise in it from time to time are its paryaya. Ripples arise and abate. But there is no change in water due to that. It remains just as it was, just that much as it was. Similarly, the coldness of the water does not alter because of the ripples arising. Water is the substance - dravya, coldness is its characteristic - guna - and ripples are the transition - paryaya. The substance in the form of water has remained just as it was. The characteristic of coldness has also remained just as it was. Ripples as modification, arise and abate. They change. Since ripples appear in water, they are the modification of water. Coldness increases or decreases. Water heats up due to atmospheric heat or sometimes it turns very cold. These are the modifications of guna - characteristic. The reason behind the

Page #83
I am the Soul 433 heating up of water is its interaction with another substance. It could be the rays of the Sun or fire in some form, but when that interaction is removed, water returns to its original coldness. The characteristic of coldness in water can never be destroyed. Thus the modification of substance and characteristic goes on happening. It does not halt even for a moment. There is no substance without modification, and no modification without substance. Similarly, there is no characteristic without modification, and no modification without characteristic. This is the law by which characteristics also arise. This state is there in both animate and inanimate substances. The broader - larger modification are visible to the eye, but the minute ones can be identified after a long time, only because of the configuring changes in substance. They are not seen otherwise. Let us understand the aspects of utpad - formation, vyaya - abating, and dhrouvya - permanence in the substance atma. Atma is a substance. Where there is substance, there is modification. Therefore, in atma too there is formation and abating. Taking on the form of the mobile body is the affected modification of the atma. Atma is not a human or such, by itself. In its pure form, atma does not need to take on any form, but it is because of Karmas that a body has to be taken. So long as there is atma with karmas, it takes on many bodies. All the bodies that were taken on in the past, the body in which it resides at present and the many bodies that it will take in future are all the affected formations of the substance atma. One body gets destroyed, and it takes on another. In the course of death, one body is let off and in the course of next birth a new body is formed. In these states, atma at either place is the same. Just as in the changing shape of ornaments, the gold is the same, in the changing bodies too the atma is the same. That is to say, atma is the substance and the changing bodies are its modifications.

Page #84
434 I am the Soul Of course, in a body too there are changing states. First of all it is a child, then a youth and then it turns old. Through these various states of the body, atma remains the same. The changing states were not of the atma. The one who recognised and accepted childhood, is the same one who recognises youth and enjoys it and recognises old age and bears it. All these three states were experienced by the same atma. It remembers everything. The state of the body changed, but the self did not. This is the proof of the permanence of atma. That it is eternal and states or modifications are subject to formation and abating, therefore impermanent. Atma is a substance and knowledge etc., are its characteristics. Characteristics are also subject to change. That is to say, there is formation and abating of modifications in them too. Knowledge is a power that knows. The knowledge in atma, knows the atma itself, experiences it. That is its natural modification. When knowledge introspects, it knows the atma. But when it becomes extrovert, it accepts the subjects of the senses. Senses are instrumental in enabling the knowing of substances. Knowledge in its extrovert state, knows the substances of the world through the senses. This is the affected modification of knowledge. Knowing the world is not the intent of knowledge, not the natural form of atma. But with the arising of karmas providing a reason, the extrovert transaction of knowledge takes place and then it gets attached to the world. Knowledge that is attached to the world knows the inanimate substances, yet it does not itself become inanimate. The knowing of varying substances from time-to-time are its changing modifications from time-to-time. These modifications form and abate, but the characteristic of knowledge never forms, and never gets destroyed. Sometimes due to amnesia, the acquired knowledge gets forgotten, and it appears as if knowledge got

Page #85
I am the Soul 435 destroyed, but it is not so. The characteristic form of a jiva is knowledge. It remains with the jiva, just as coldness remains related to water. Just as the coldness of water cannot be totally destroyed even with millions of attempts; in the same way, this jiva even when it takes on the most minute life form like nigoda, the characteristic of knowledge that resides in the atma does not get lost. In a minute body, there are no means of expression for the knowledge. Therefore, the knowledge remains unexpressed. Yet it does not mean that there is no knowledge. The living of the jiva is itself proof of knowledge being there. Interacting with Karma, the jiva transits into the passion form of knowledge, yet it does not turn into passion. This is the permanence of guna - characteristic, and the utpad and vyaya (formation and abating) which is modifying in the characteristic. It is therefore, that just as atma is sat, its characteristics are also eternally existent. The intention of all this analysis is to prove that atma is not momentary but an eternal substance. In the gatha, Gurudev says that atma in the form of substance is permanent, while transiting in its modifications it is impermanent. Even when the body changes form childhood to other, the atma never changes. Only one atma has the knowledge of all these states. If atma were to be momentary, it cannot have any knowledge other than the present modification. If the one who knows the past and the future, is destroyed, then who will know? Therefore, atma is not momentary, it is permanent. More on this subject later....

Page #86
The speaker is not momentary... The devoted pursuit of the three gems manifests the original form of atma. The atma traversing through lives with the aid of artificial forms has believed these forms to be its own. It has not recognised its own true original form, and hence there is the bafflement about atma. The doubting disciple too, has been inspired by some quandary to believe the atma to be momentary and not accept its permanence. All the visible substances of the world make one experience impermanence. Seeing this, he had told Gurudev that it does not seem as if atma is permanent. After establishing that through all the states of the body, the atma remains the same, Gurudev further explains this subject - athavA jJAna kSaNikarnu, je jANI vadanAra; agant a enfuich afe, ait 34a faute .....88 O Disciple! You have now accepted that there is atma in your body. You say atma is momentary. So I ask you, is it your atma or somebody else that is saying that atma is momentary? Who speaks from inside? If its your atma speaking, then when did it realise that atma is momentary? In your opinion if it was momentary, then the atma that knew is now destroyed. The speaker is somebody else, who never knew. So how do we believe what it says? If it is speaking without knowing, then the matter is not worth believing, and if it is speaking with knowledge, it cannot be momentary. For it takes at least one moment to know. If it says what it just learnt, that would take another moment. Such a situation is of two moments. So the argument that since everything is momentary, atma is also momentary, does not hold good. It is our experience that whatever we say, we think before we say. We cannot speak at the same moment as we are thinking. The thinking moment is different and the speaking moment is

Page #87
I am the Soul 437 different. The one who has thought in a given moment alone can speak in the next. If both were to be different, no thoughts could ever be expressed. If thought and the thinker were both destroyed, who would speak, and say what? In the same way, the emotions of anger and such arising in our atma, arise in one moment and are expressed in another. Why, that's not all! We sometimes tell others about the emotions of anger-forgiveness, laughter-mourning, likes-dislikes that were felt days, months or years ago. "I had liked this stuff very much at that time, and I like it today too' - when can this be said? If the one, who liked what he liked, from when he liked until today, is existent! Not otherwise. Thus it does not appear as if, the one, who speaks after considering all views, and with the knowledge of the momentary nature of all substances, is oneself momentary. Even in our life we would have experienced this. Therefore, atma is not momentary; although it resides in the body, it is different from the body; and it is eternal. If we were to accept that atma is momentary, then karma philosophy would not hold water. The doer and sufferer of karma are both the same, and not different. When karma binds, it may give the result immediately or may not. Most karmas are to be suffered after a long time. If the one who has attached those karmas lives for a long time, only then can he suffer them. Who else would suffer them otherwise? How can one suffer the karmas of another? If that were to be, then there would be chaos in the world system. Somebody commits a crime; can some one else be punished for it? This does not happen even in the material world, so it cannot ever happen in the spiritual world. For the rules and regulations laid down as principles in the material world form the background for the pursuit of the atma. The spiritual world is self-driven; there is no doubt about it. So in this view too, atma is eternal.

Page #88
438 I am the Soul The proving of atma's eternal nature is a very benevolent means for us. One in whose mind this belief gets settled firmly, his fear of death will disappear. Death is imminent, but the understanding will be firm that, that which dies is the body. I do not die. I am beyond the realm of age or death. He is exhilarated and sings - sahajAnaMdI zuddha svarUpI, avinAzI hu~ Atma svarUpa; E TE ART, 3161 3747 U H... #... One, who has such a firm belief, would have conquered fear. Let the body and soul get separated, what do I have to lose? If the atma's time of residing in this body is over and therefore it walks away from the body, what is wrong? Wherever, whoever has to remain for however long, he remains there only that long, can remain only that long. Once the time is up there has to be a departure! Such an understanding proves benevolent for a devoted and believing jiva. These feelings have been expressed beautifully in a verse - nitya chu, nitya chu AtamA nitya chu, to pachI maraNa bhaya kema mhAre ? bhale mare zatruo, rAga dveSAdio, 3747 9241u tita 7 RIH..... vIrya rajathI banyuM, mATInuM DhekuM Apa, jAya zamazAnamAM jaDa - svabhAve; kSaNe kSaNe malI-bikharI dazA palaTe paNa, faru 410 Fraf ara.....? I am the soul, and am eternal. Now where is the need to retain the fear of death? The feelings of attachment and aversion, arise and abate, these are my enemies. If they die, they might as well. I neither need attachment nor do I need aversion. I, that is atma, and the fundamental form of inanimate pudgal, the paramanu - atom, these two never die. They are immortal.

Page #89
I am the Soul 439 What gets disintegrated is the body, for it is made from a collection of inanimate pudgal. Therefore, it has to get disintegrated. The body gets disintegrated and it is burnt. If body were animate, it need not have died, need not be burnt. But the state of the body that is formed from the atoms that get together and break apart from time-to-time, is ever changing. It undergoes many changes and at the end it has to turn into ashes, but the atoms never get destroyed. Thus one who has a true belief through experience of the eternal nature of the atma, that atmu never fears over the disintegration of the body. But if death is imminent, it has to be prepared for. In fact, a human has to be prepared for death from the time he is born. Indeed, this might sound very odd. But one does not know when death may befall after birth. It is necessary to be alert at every moment. When death comes, you can go laughing. No attachment or aversion should be bothering him. At the time of death there should not be any recommendations due. But when the indication of death comes, everything else should be abandoned and one should try to stabilise within the self. Nothing else but the Lord Atma should be recollected. To be prepared in such a way, the jiva's nature of being subject to reasons needs to be changed. It is necessary that the self advises the self that no reason, big or small, shall disturb the jiva. As and how the jiva takes advice, it begins to stabilise in the self. It gives up being subject to the instruments of attachment and aversion. It gives up mixing with the reasons for attachment and aversion. Once there is a daily drill, a daily practice, then one will be all decked up and set when death comes calling. Brothers! This is the preparation for death. The self is prepared within the self. Then there is nothing more to do! Here Gurudev has offered strong arguments about the eternal nature of atma to the disciple and has convinced him that atma is different from the body, independent, and eternal. And the

Page #90
440 I am the Soul disciple too has accepted this with belief. He is standing before the Gurudev in all humility and with reverence. The Gurudev now wants to ask him a question about the eternal nature of atma and elicit from him that, 'Gurudev! Atma is eternal, eternal and eternal and I accept this fact.' That question follows....

Page #91
... find with what it mixes! The pursuit of three gems brings out the eternal quality of the jiva. Birth, growing old, death are all aspects attached to the body. The unaccompanied utma does not have a body, nor birth, nor old-age, nor death. It the original form of atma, such situations are impossible. Playing into the hands of karma, it played all the games that karma planned for it. As a result the atma had to remain in what is not its own true disposition. It had to, just that. If we look into our entire past, whether the jiva did something or not, it certainly went through birth and death. Wherever it was born, whether it performed the required duties, or stood by its responsibilities, or did something good, or not, but it certainly went through birth and death. It has attained a rise and fail with the help of karma. The jiva has certain duties even when born as an animal. If you tie a cow in your shed and look after it, you are bound to expect milk, and giving milk is the duty of the cow. If you have reared a dog, its duty is to protect the house. If you pay a servant, working with a sense of responsibility is his duty. Thus in various births, there are various duties. But it is not that at all times the jiva performs these duties. It may have failed sometimes. But it has never faltered in being born and attaining death. And how many births and deaths? Infinite - which cannot be counted. Do you know, Brothers! The ordinary vegetable jivas like roots and bulbs go through 65,536 lives in a matter of less than 48 minutes. They are born and die as many times! Just think! If they are born and die so many times in less than 48 minutes, how long could be their life-span? If we were to begin counting 1 - 2 - 3, we may not perhaps complete counting 65,536 in that time. What might the jiva be doing is such a short life-span? Our basic intellect says it may not do anything. Where is the time to do anything? But the sages measure a period in terms of time. In

Page #92
442 I am the Soul their precise and micro-knowledge there is a count of the activity of the jiva through every passing moment. That is why they say that a jiva, in its one life, suffers infinite number of karmas, performs the nirjara of infinite number of karmas and binds itself in infinite number of karmas. But this fact is indigestible. Just how can it happen? There is this short time span of life and how can there be infinite karmas being suffered, discharged and bonded? But Brothers! This jiva of nigoda has to travel further. It has to rise. It is lying there from infinite time but desires to rise. That can happen only when its infinite karmas are discharged. It can progress only on the strength of this discharge. The discharge may well not be done knowingly, it may just happen after due suffering over which it has no control, and that may give the jiva, the eligibility to move forward. So thus it suffers and in the process discharges infinite karmas. This is the means of its progress. All jivas need some means when they have to climb up. In climbing down a person may even jump and come down. There is not much effort involved in it. But in climbing up there has to be a strong support. These jivas too climb up on the strength of nirjara. In such a short time of life, it is worth thinking, as to how many karmas they bind and when. Every jiva at every moment binds seven types of karmas. These jivas too bind all these seven types of karmas. It is difficult to measure the time span of their life. But if we were to consider broadly, we might say they go through 22 to 23 lives in a second. Now the karma philosophy has a rule that any jiva will die only after it has ascertained the life span for the next life, not before that. These jivas also go through the same. That is to say, in their very short life-span, they bind themselves with the life of the next birth and then die. Therefore, they have bonded all eight karmas. In terms of time, their life time is infinite.

Page #93
I am the Soul 443 This subject is worth knowing in great detail. Another question that occurs is - nigoda jiva, what can be its capacity? With what will it bind karma? Yes, Brothers! We have five reasons for binding karma - mithyatva, avrat, pramad, kashaya and yoga. This jiva has all these five present in it. It is not endowed with sumakit, it cannot perform any vows or rituals, it is already into pramada, all the passions are there in it and of course there is only one yoga of body. So there are all the reasons for bondage of karma. Of course, it is true that their growth is very less and hence all these reasons are not strong. They may not be able to bind the same type and same quantum of nikachit karinas that we might bind on account of such reasons, yet the reasons are present there. Since attachment and aversion are there, unexpressed, the jiva has the ability to bind karmas. Brothers! This was only matter pertaining to jivas in the nigoda. But other than these the jivas residing in all four different gatis keep playing this game with Karma. They never rise above it. What I intend to say is, has the jiva managed to make any progress in the many births that it has taken? Has it been able to perform its own duties? Has it been able to offer any services at the social level? Has it been able to achieve any progress at the spiritual level? It may or may not do all this but it certainly goes through birth and death. That never stops. It is to escape this, to get away from the whirlpool of birth and death that our infinitely benevolent Prabhu has shown us the path. He has placed the very deepest principles of spirituality before us. He demonstrates that atma is eternal. Understand that it has no birth and death, believe in it and devotedly pursue it and break this chain of births and deaths, so that the atma is liberated forever. The discussion of the six statements in Atmasiddhi Shastra is to understand this truth alone. All the statements are very important. Through them, by proving the eternal nature of atma,

Page #94
444 I am the Soul we are inspired to awaken its supreme nature. Only if atma is eternal can its supreme nature become manifest. For once the atma has become paramatma, the supreme, then it remains so in the same form for infinite time. Anandhghanji Maharaj has recited jhyo sAhiba saMga na parihare re bhAMge sAdi anaMta RSabha jinezvara prItama mAharo re 'Sahib' refers to the supreme energy that resides in the soul. Once a jiva is able to charm this energy into its control, then for infinite time this remains with the atma. It will not leave the company. Such a limitless power is there in the atma. Once it begins to dwell in its own true disposition, then nothing ever can let the affected disposition touch it. The cycle of birth and death stops. The disciple's doubt has been cleared. That the atma is eternal has now firmly been lodged in his belief. A smile of satisfaction is now gracing his face. It is then that Gurudev poses the question about the ultimate transition of animate and inanimate. He asks the disciple - kyAre koI vastuno, kevaLa hoya na nAza; cetana pAme nAza to, kemAM bhaLe tapAsa . 190 A timeless principle of the Universe is that matter can never be destroyed nor can it ever be created. The creation and destruction that is visible is merely that of its various states. A particular state develops in matter and with time being instrumental, that state gets transformed. Like the earthen pot. Pot is not by itself some independent substance. It is not as if there was nothing until yesterday and today the pot is created. Before the pot there was clay. Nobody made clay, but it is there in the form of atoms. The pot came to be from the existence of clay, that is to say, the atoms which were in the form of clay are

Page #95
I am the Soul 445 now in the form of a pot. When the same pot breaks up, it turns into pieces. Out of those pieces dust is formed. There might even be a finer powder out of it. Eventually it might spread in the atmosphere. In spite of the various states of destruction that the pot may go through, it remains in the form of atoms. Atoms are never destroyed. The destroyed form of the larger groups of pudgala is atom - paramanu. There is no state beyond the paramanu. Paramanu cannot be destroyed, and in the same way cannot be created either. There is no power in the universe that can create or destroy a paramanu. In fact the inanimate power cannot even see the paramanu. Brothers! You know that the science had challenged that the paramanu which the scriptures could not see, we have seen under the microscope. Therefore, the scriptures are proved wrong. But the atoms discovered by science were split. They further disintegrated. Paramanu is something which cannot be further split into parts. It is the ultimate part of pudgala. What science had seen was merely a group of paramanus formed into a skandha, and not a paramanu. In spite of there being very powerful equipment in the scientists' laboratories, all that equipment is inanimate. The power of inanimate is limited and that of animate is limitless. That is how our omniscient Bhagawants could see the parmanu form of the pudgala. Just think, Brothers! How great might the power of the Supreme Soul be, that it could see that substance and not merely that substance but its qualities and its transformation at every moment, in the matter of a moment, for which science has spent billions like water, spent entire lives over research and given everything that it has, but in vain. In the state of omniscience, the schematics of the entire Universe is flashed at once. Then how large must the laboratory of the Kevali Parmatma be? What experiments! What Power!

Page #96
446 I am the Soul Brothers! The atmas in pursuit of the infinite have attained the infinite. All the energies manifested by the kevali are infinite! Infinite knowledge, infinite faith, infinite strength and infinite bliss. Only one who attains the infinite can know the infinite substances, can know the infiniteness of the substance, can measure the infinite energies of the substance! What can the limited scientists do to measure the paramanu which the Kevali Paramatma has seen? That is why the Kevali Paramatma has said that the paramanu cannot be created by anybody and can neither be destroyed. The destructible substances that are visible are all skandhas of paramanus. Skandhas break up, they get destroyed and then remain in this Universe in their ultimate state, in the form of paramanus; they have remained so from infinite time and will remain so for infinite time. Gurudev is saying to the disciple, "O Child! I have told you about the most minute form of the inanimate. Now I ask you that if according to your belief, the animate - atma gets destroyed, then what will be its transformation? You tell me now!" The disciple was perplexed. What can be the answer to Gurudev's questions? Then he recollected the question which Ganadhar Gautam had asked Prabhu Mahaveer. Gautam had asked, "When was this jiva created? Out of what?" The kevaljnani Tirthankar Mahavir began to unfold the layers of past one after the other. He went into infinite time but could not ascertain out of what the jiva was formed. In his knowledge all he found was the self and natural existence of the atma. Prabhu told Gautam, "I do not see the creation of the jiva in my knowledge at all! Therefore, it is without a beginning. That which has no beginning is anadi, and that which has no end is endless - anant. Gautam had another question, "Prabhu! Then when does the jiva end?" And the omniscient Prabhu began to unfold the

Page #97
I am the Soul 447 layers of future with his divine vision until he reached distant infinite future. But after seeing the many births and deaths of the jiva, he saw the great jiva transform into its true natural form, ultimately getting liberated and upon liberation remaining in that supreme state for infinite time. Gautam heard the deep voice of Prabhu, "Gautam! Jiva is without an end. It can never be destroyed." Thus jiva is without creation or destruction. This whole episode ran across the canvas of the disciple's mind. He was speechless. He did not have the answer to Gurudev's questions. Therefore he humbly bowed at Gurudev's feet. Gurudev was pleased. The eternal nature of utma had got registered in the belief of the disciple. A sadhak poet had said, while reaffirming the natural eternity - agni kASTha AkAre rahe paNa, thAya na kASTha e vAta nakkI . . . hAM Pilet qui dan TER OUT, 311Hart a Fang Cant... zarIrAkAra rahI zarIra na thAUM, lavaNa jema jaNAUM sahI . . . hAM retu Fan-chil917h, Faei-valfa te ne... 3114 114 sueim aitfut, choisi cils Hoteft ... yreiterait aistot HIGUT 1914, HEGHE E Simaet... . The fire that is residing in the firewood, remains there for years, but that energy does not get converted to wood itself. It might be occupying every particle of the wood, yet even if it desires to be separated from the wood it cannot be. It remains as energy in the wood, and yet it does not become wood. It cannot absorb the characteristics of wood. The salt that is added to a cooked vegetable cannot be seen. Other than that you can see turmeric, chillies, coriander seeds, jeera, oil and other substances that are added. But to ascertain whether there is salt or not, the preparation has to be tasted. Only from taste can it be ascertained. The salt that is added to the preparation, which is not visible to the eyes, can be known by the sense of taste.

Page #98
448 I am the Soul In the same way, atma says that 'I have been with a body for infinite time. Whatever the shape of the body, I remain in that shape. While in the body of an elephant, I am shaped like and elephant and while in the body of an insect, like an insect. As many shapes as there are bodies, but that does not make me the body. Never until now have I become the body and never will that happen.' Indeed, like the salt in the vegetable preparation that cannot be seen and yet can be experienced by tasting, although I am there in the body, I cannot be seen with the eyes, cannot be sensed with any senses. But I am self-illumined. There is no necessity of any other light to see me. There is no need of another light to see a gem or a lamp. I am myself in the form of a glow. Only from the manifest characteristics of energy can I be known. There is a certain way of catching hold of me, of knowing me - I cannot simply be caught hold of just like that. Just as a burning cinder cannot be picked up by hand, but needs a pincer, 'I' too can be caught only with the knowledge of the atma and that too only at the hands of some 'sajjan'. That is sat + jan = sajjan. That man who has a great urge to know the sat, the truth, is a sajjan. Only such a sajjan has the awakened knowledge and hence can catch hold of me. The electricity that is in the water and butter that is in the milk, can only be drawn through an effort. If there is no effort, the substance does not come to hand. What massive machinery is required to generate electricity out of water! What an expense of time, energy and money! Only when this is applied correctly can electricity be drawn from water, otherwise it remains there for millions of years. Nothing can be attained. To draw butter from milk too, such an effort is necessary! In the same way the atma that resides in the body can be reached. The naturally blissful form of atma can be reached only through the procedure of experience..

Page #99
I am the Soul Thus the sages say that atma is reachable through experience. It is a substance that cannot come in the reach of senses or mind, an extrasensory substance. The disciple liked all the explanations offered by the Gurudev, his faith settled on them and he learned them well. It is thus that the disciple exclaims - bIjuM pada te mAro AtmA avinAzI che dhruva ne zAzvata svarUpa . . . 2 deha - dehInI abheda bhinnatA . (2) myAnamAM samazera rUpa 449 A... Jain Educationa International Having believed the eternal nature of atma, the next doubt that the disciple raises, will come later. For Personal and Private Use Only.

Page #100
... therefore, atma cannot be bound! The pursuit of three gems destroys the blemish of karma. For the pure atma, karma is a blemish. And where there is karma, there is the cycle of material world. With the destruction of karma, this cycle also gets destroyed. Two of the doubts that the disciple had, have been cleared - atma exists, and it is eternal - this fact has registered deeply in his mind. The thoughtful disciple applies his mind more on these two statements. From the view of substance and transformation, this thinking generates some more doubts in his mind. As a substance atma is eternal, yet it transits through various modifications. Which is apparent while looking at all the jivas in the world. There is no limit to the variety in the jivas. There has to be some strong reason for this variety. There cannot be an effect without a cause. As he thought, the truth dawned upon the disciple that this variety in the modification of the jivas must be because of the karma. If the cause is the karma, then who does the karma? Is it atma that does karma? Or somebody else? In this doubt, the basis is the Sankhya philosophy. For Sankhya philosophy believes in five knowledge-senses, five karmic-senses, five bhutas, five tanmatras, mind, intellect, life and ego as twentyfour principles and purusha as the twenty-fifth. There the purusha, that is the atma, is believed to be a non-doer and a nonsufferer. Therefore, the disciple has the doubt whether the atma is the doer of karma or not. Whatever doubts arise in his mind while deliberating over this, he places them before the Gurudev kartA jIva na karmano, karma ja kartA karma; 37941 HEST TAHTa chi, af vidt af .....68

Page #101
I am the Soul 451 O Gurudev! It does not appear as if jiva is the doer of karma. But karma itself is the doer of karma. The karmas that are lying in charge on the jiva must be attracting more karmas towards them. Therefore, through karma, karma is bound with karma. For atma is animate and karma is inanimate. Indeed, the yoga of mind, speech and body through which karma is done, is also inanimate. The activity done by the inanimate absorbs inanimate karmas. So the inanimate karmas are bound with the inanimate. How can animate and inanimate be bound together? When you tie some thing with a thread, it is the thread to which the knot is tied. The knot is not tied with that thing. When you place a chain around the dog's neck, the chain is locked with the chain and not with the dog's neck. Thus the inanimate karmas do not get bound with the atma, but only with other inanimate karmas. Indeed, atma is formless and according to sages karmas are with form. So the formless cannot be bound to something with form. Something with a form can be bound to some other thing with a form. It appears logical to say that karmas can be bound only with karmas. If it were not so, the flow of karma into the atma must be happening of its own accord. It must be the natural disposition of karma that effortlessly, without any attempt on the part of the atma, it must be entering the atma. But if this is believed, then the performance of atma is not proved. If this were not so, then it must be the natural disposition of the jiva to be doing karma. But if we were to believe this, then there are no possibilities of the jiva reaching moksa. For natural disposition is that which cannot be separated from a substance. So if jiva is constantly doing karma, then it can never attain moksa. If all these options were not right, then - AtmA sadA asaMga ne, kare prakRti baMdha; 37991 STE DUT, Agit sila 3 de .....63

Page #102
452 I am the Soul It is the natural disposition of the atma to be un-attached. It is pure - intelligent - blemish-less. Attachment and aversion are not its natural disposition. How can such an atma with a pure original form do any karma? Therefore, it must be the activity of the three qualities - sattva, rajas and tamas, which must be doing the karmas. Atma seems to have nothing to do with it. Therefore, the bondage is of the activity. Atma cannot be bound. This belief is also from the Sankhya - Vedanta Philosophy. The disciple is raising such a doubt only on the basis of this belief. And the Yoga - Naiyayika Philosophers while accepting the existence of atma, have a faith in the Eshwar in the form of a creator. Therefore, whatever is happening in this world, it is with the inspiration of the Eshwar. There is also such a belief. This fact is also registered in the mind of the disciple and hence he says that jiva does nothing, it is the Eshwar who is getting it done through him. Therefore, atma is proved to be free from bondage. If atma is not being proved to be the doer of karma through any logic, then what is the purpose of striving for moksa mATe mokSa upAyano, koI na hetu jaNAya; of moj aluuj, ai FET, ET TEMAN .....63 Disciple says, "Gurudev! After considerable thought it appears that - a) either jiva is not the doer of karma, and b) if it is, then doing karma must be its natural disposition." In the first argument, the nature of doing karma instead of being rested with jiva, is being placed upon various others - 1. Karma does more karma. 2. Karma naturally flows into atma. 3. Activity leads to karma-bondage, and 4. Karma binds through the inspiration of Eshwar. By looking at all these four arguments, it appears as if the jiva does not do any karma. It is a non-doer and so it is also not bonded by karma. Whoever is bound has an urge to be free. But

Page #103
I am the Soul 453 what is freedom to one who is not bound? So why should there be an effort for moksa? Indeed, how can somebody, who cannot do anything at all, undertake to do the tremendous effort for moksa? There is no strength in it to do anything. In the second argument, atma is the doer of karma. So that must be its natural disposition. That which is a natural disposition cannot be separated from the jiva. So the nature of doing karma remains in the jiva always, it is never far from the jiva and if so then too there is no possibility of the jiva's moksa. So, O Gurudev! Although you are inspiring the tremendous effort for moksa, it is futile. All these doubts are confusing my mind, so please be graceful and offer me some clarification. Here, from the questions of the disciple, and his deliberation over the principles it is evident that he is a student of various philosophies. But he is confused because of the contradictory beliefs of the philosophers. Gurudev is experienced in principles. He knows the deep mysteries of Dharma. He is aware that the ultimate form of a philosophy is Dharma. Where philosophy creates a state of confusion due to contradictory opinions, Dharma establishes a mutual understanding and simply unravels the mysteries of principles. Hence, the disciple is requesting the Gurudev, to learn from him the essence of Dharma. Heeding to the disciple's request, what the Gurudev tells him, we will soon know...

Page #104
If the Chetan were not the inspiration ... The jiva in pursuit of the three gems gradually inculcates the feeling of a non-doer. The purity of the atma goes on increasing and the resultant growing stability within the atma leads to a waning of desire and thus the bondage of karma reduces. This is achievable only through the true tremendous effort of the jiva. If the jiva makes the pursuit on the path of non-devotion then the karmas grow in chunks, while if the effort is on the devotional path then along with the discharge of karma, the bondage of new karma also declines. In the mind of the curious disciple, it is this doubt that lingers - whether the effort to attract karma is done by the jiva or is there any other reason? That is to say, is the jiva the doer of karma or not? This question has been placed before the Gurudev. Before the Gurudev replies, let us do a little thinking on this subject. It is essential to consider from various angles, the nature of the jiva in doing karma. The syadvad principle of the Jain philosophy is based on Naya. It examines every subject from various nayas and only then comes to a conclusion. There are two main nayas - vyavahara naya and niscaya naya. There are further more subdivisions. According to vyvahara naya, there would be two ways of considering - 1. According to vyavahara naya, atma is the doer of inanimate karma. The atma with karma harbours attachment and aversion. With the rise of karma a jiva develops both attachment and aversion. The jiva mixes with attachment and aversion and itself begins to behave in their form. As a result there is a vibration in the atma, and this vibration - like the wrestler in the arena whose oily body collects soil - absorbs the paramanus in the atmosphere eligible for karma, and they get bound to the atma like water with milk. Thus the atma is the doer of inanimate karma.

Page #105
I am the Soul 455 2. According to Vyavahara naya, atma is maker of things like villages, cities, pots and pans etc. Practically all the things that are made, we have seen them being made by somebody. Indeed, the usage is always that this pot was made by the potter'. "This house was built by the mason'. 'I did this work". Thus formally, this is the practice. If we look at the truth, the paramanus from which a thing was made, those paramanus had the ability to transit into that form, and the person was merely instrumental in transforming them. Just as the pot was made from clay. Clay had the ability to become a pot, and the potter became instrumental. Yet in practice, it is said that the potter made the pot. So according to vyavahara naya atma is the maker of things. 3. As per the impure niscaya naya, atma is the doer of chetan karmas. Actually karmas are inanimate. But instigated by inanimate karmas, the feelings of attachment and aversion arise in the atma, atma generates those feelings. Therefore attachment etc. have been termed as chetan karmas. These karmas are not the true natural disposition of the jiva, but passions of the jiva. Therefore, as per imperfect niscaya naya atma is the doer of attachment etc. 4. As per pure niscaya naya, atma is doer of infinite knowledge etc. that are the true original form. Infinite knowledge is the characteristic of atma. There are transformations in the characteristic. Jiva does those transformations of the knowledge and hence as per perfect niscaya naya it is the doer of knowledge etc. 5. Under the ultimate pure niscaya naya, atma is a nondoer. Atma in its natural true form is unbreakable and sans emotions. That, natural disposition exists, is an all-time truth. It does not have to be made. The coolness that exists in water is always there. Water does not have to do anything for that coolness. Similarly the natural disposition in the atma which is there eternally is the ultimate transforming feeling and the atma

Page #106
456 I am the Soul does not have to do anything about it. Therefore according to ultimate perfect niscaya naya, atma is a non-doer. Thus with the jiva the status of doer gets attached from various views, and from several other views jiva is a non-doer. The syadvada principle accepts the jiva to be both a doer and a non-doer. In Natak Samaysar, poet Banarasidas explains this principle - gyAna sarupI AtamA kare gyAna nahi aura daraba karaNa cetana karai, faaert at.... The atma in the true form of knowledge does nothing else but knowledge, but if it is so said that the chetan does dravya karma, it is from the vyavahara naya view. Banarasidas also calls atma the doer of knowledge as per niscaya and the doer of karma as per vyavahara. Keeping all these beliefs in mind, Gurudev offers the disciple his own clarification - hoya na cetana preraNA, koNa grahe to karma? 53 Faura TE RUIT, yait faerdar .....08 The disciple had a raised a doubt that "jiva is not the doer of karma'. In reply Gurudev says, "Who is it that attracts the karma pudgala in the space towards the atma? When there is a throbbing of attachment or aversion in the atma, when the atma develops a feeling, the waves of these feelings reach out, and disturb the pudgala of karmic category in the space. The pudgalas are simply floating in the space in their natural state, merely touching the bodies and going on, not affecting either body, mind or soul. But the waves of attachment / aversion of the atma reach out and inspire the pudgala of the karmic category to bind with the atma. As a result the karma pudgalas get attracted and lodge

Page #107
I am the Soul 457 themselves on the atma. This does not happen without being inspired by the atma. The karmas lodged on the atma are also inanimate. They are attracted at the behest of atma, but if the jiva were to refrain from any feelings of attachment etc., then merely by the rise of the inanimate karma other karmas do not get attracted - there is no asrava. However powerful the infinite karmas, lodged on the utma, might be, but they are endowed with the power to inspire the outside karmic pudgala and attract towards themselves. From this view jiva has been considered the inspiration for karma but not the doer. Inanimate things do not have this power. They cannot inspire any body in any way. You have an excellent volume of the scriptures. It remains in the book-case for years, but if the inspiration of self-study does not awaken from within and you do not pick up that volume, it does not inspire you, saying, "Brother! Pick me up and read!" Similarly, you are angry and there is a stick nearby. It does not fly on its own and hurt your enemy, but if you pick it up in your hand and throw it then it works. Why! If somebody goes into an armoury full of weapons and murders somebody, not a single weapon rises from its place to punish the murderer. There may be a thousand books of law amidst which a sinister crime may take place, yet not one of those books is going to be a witness. Thus, inanimate things do not have the power to inspire any body. If it were so, then we would have seen the feelings of attachment etc., arising in pots and pans and they too would begin to bind karma. But we have never seen anger rising in any inanimate thing nor seen any such other emotion. Thus karma bondage occurs only with the inspirational power of the atma. That power does not exist in the inanimate. Therefore, jiva is the doer of karma, and the other thing which

Page #108
458 I am the Soul the disciple had said that karma itself does karma is also proved incorrect. As noted earlier, there is inspirational power in it. The doubting disciple had said in the third and fourth line of his gatha - - that 'it seems to be the natural disposition, and karma is the Dharma of jiva. Both these doubts are now being clarified by the Gurudev - jo cetana karatuM nathI, nathI thatAM to karma; azit HEGT Faeta fe, 1957 the ha af .....04 Karma gets bonded with the atma on account of its natural disposition. This option does not occur because of anything. As is noted earlier, karma will be attracted only when the atma does the feeling of attachment and the like. The atma does bhavakarma in the form of attachment etc., and the dravyakarmas in the form of karmic pudgala get transformed into karmic forms like jnanavarniya etc. Bhavakarma are the cause and dravyakarmas their effect. It is impossible to have an effect without a cause. Therefore, karmas cannot automatically get attached to the atma. If the chetan were not to harbour the feelings of attachment etc., there would be no karmas. Those jivas who have attained moksa, too were bonded in karma so long as they harboured the feelings of attachment and aversion, and they were accumulating more karmas. But from the moment the chetan stopped inspiring the feelings of attachment etc., the karma accumulation was stopped. In our scriptures, there are many anecdotes of many such jivas. Muni Gajasukumar wanted instant moksa and he expressed such a desire before the Prabhu. "Prabhu! I don't want to perform a long penance and attain moksa, I want instant moksa." Prabhu replied, "Go! Go into the cemetery, let go of all external feelings, get immersed in the true form of the atma and attain moksa!" Gajasukumar went into the cemetery. He wound up the chetan within himself and told it, "Restrain all your inspirational power to yourself, and come what may do not express any feelings

Page #109
I am the Soul 459 like attachment etc." Well, the chetan understood and wound up its activity. But would the karmas lying on the atma let go so easily? They began to show their effect. Now a situation developed where atma was expressing attachment over the body and aversion towards the reason. But chetan had a strong order, and just would not budge. It did not care for the karma udaya - the rising karmas. It remained absolutely to itself and Gajasukumar got an instant moksa. All reasons were fit to have the effect of karma bondage, but "jo chetan . . (57 Tah 727, te sai a 7HF;)' he proved the statement - that unless chetan does them, karmas cannot occur - true. Gurudev too says that so being the case, it is not the nature of karma to automatically attach to the atma. The other aspect, where you say that it is the jiva's Dharma to do karma, is also not logical. Dharma is that which can never be separated from a substance. The sweetness of sugar never ever leaves it. Not even millions of attempts can succeed in doing so. In the same way, if doing karma is the Dharma of a jiva, then it will never stop doing karma and then moksa would never be possible for a jiva. It would never get rid of karmas done, for that disposition would be natural. Indeed atma is the doer which receives karma and karma is the receivable substance. So the receiver and the receivable substance can never become one. The two are related through interaction but not through inseparability. Therefore, they will not remain together forever. At the same time karma is not instrumental in the true and pure original form of atma. It is on account of the ignorance that the jiva transits to such a transformation. So ignorance is the biggest bewilderment. It cannot remain forever and it is totally discard-able.

Page #110
460 I am the Soul Thus doing of karmas is not the Dharma of jiva. Here, Gurudev has clarified two doubts raised by the disciple. One, that he had believed the natural flow of karma into the atma, and two, that doing karma is the Dharma of jiva. There are more doubts raised by the disciple on this subject. How Gurudev clarifies those is what follows....

Page #111
Detached though it may seem ... The pursuit of three gems, enable the experience of chaitanya. It explains what the - arthakriyakarittva - the meaning, the activity and the performance of chaitanya is. When any substance is in its own natural true form, it is said to be its arthakriyakarittva, that is to say the substance is acting in accordance with its nature. The mystery behind the doubt raised by the disciple is whether atma is capable of doing anything at all! To what extent is the chetana in the atma operative? Until now the jiva has only known the activity of the inanimate. It is ignorant about the activity of the atma, and hence it is natural that this doubt should arise. Prior to this, we have considered this aspect in the light of vyavahara naya and niscaya naya. There are the various types of actions and ultimately inaction of the atma. Gurudev too, has clarified the doubts of the disciple. Only if the chetan inspires the karma occurs and if it does not, then no karma occurs. It is all very simple. Attachment and aversion are not the true natural disposition of the jiva, yet it goes into the affected disposition and harbours these feelings and attracts karmas. Jiva should give up harbouring these feelings of attachment etc., then no karmas would be attracted. In the same context, the disciple had said, 'atma is always detached - 347A HET BRUT - Detached atma is totally devoid of any attachment, then how can it accumulate karma? Gurudev replies kevaLa hota asaMga jo, bhAsata tane na kema? BRITT Refert, qut FGT ATAU ..... Asangabhava - 3TH Ya - is the feeling of total detachment from all ties. In other words it is the nigrantha - Free - state. The

Page #112
462 I am the Soul release of all knots inside and outside is the state of nigrantha. Srimadji too has described the nirgrantha state as the castingoff of the sharp ties of all relations. Grantha is a knot. The internal and external knots have a deep relation. Where a jiva takes birth, especially in the human form, it has several relations for which it does not have to make any efforts in this life. By virtue of the residual ties of the previous birth, the new relations with parents and siblings are formed the moment jiva is born. The relations with friends are developed with an understanding. That is to say a knot is tied. What knot is this? With whomsoever a relation is established, when the feelings of attachment of the self are tied to the feelings of attachment of another, it is a knot and that is when a relation is established. In the same way, the relation of enmity is also established. There the jiva ties the knot of aversion. This is granthi - the knot. In the attainment of the nirgrantha state of a jiva, these knots are a hindrance. It becomes impossible to get immersed in the meditation of the atma. If the thread, that has to pass through the eye of the needle, has a knot on it, then the thread cannot pass. Why! If after the thread passes through the eye of the needle and then a knot is added, then the thread does not pass through the cloth. Brothers! Wherever there are knots, this is how it is! Knots obstruct progress. They do not let you proceed further. But look at our paradox! The jiva likes to add on knots of both attachment and aversion. This jiva harbours the wish to increase the relations of attachment as much as possible, and the feeling to further strengthen the relations of aversion. The tremendous effort in loosening and then getting rid or cutting off these knots of attachment and aversion is the tremendous effort of attaining the nirgrantha state. Simultaneously, the internal nirgrantha state has also to be attained. That is attainable only with the abandoning of the

Page #113
I am the Soul 463 affected disposition that is attachment and aversion. The dampening of attachment and aversion thus attained is the nirgrantha state. That is the detachment from all ties - sarva sanga parityaga. Detachment from kith and kin and possessions on the outside and from the feelings of attachment and possessiveness on the inside. Only when such a state of detachment arises in the jiva, that it can experience the self. In the supreme detached state not even one karmic atom remains attached. In Srimadji's own words - eka paramANu mAtranI na maLe sparzatA, gof ancie TFEN BIETAT Fathu ..... Where the jiva's attachment with all paramanus is cut off totally, that is the asanga state - the detached state. Only the jiva surrounded by karmic paramanus remains in the worldly cycle; but in the ultimate state of the progress of the self, all paramanus including karmic paramanus get cut off. Mind, speech, body and karma which are all in the form of pudgala get separated from the atma and it becomes totally free of blemish and attains its original undivided, unwavering form. This is called the totally nirgrantha state, and this is the detached state. Gurudev says, 'had the jiva been in this state, it would surely have experienced it. But what has been the experience until now? Indeed, have you ever experienced a time when the atma did not have some hue or attachment?' Brothers! If we were to consider the experiences of our lifetime, then all of them are born out of our attachment with some person or thing. The affection for extraneous substances and the deep interaction with them have been the reasons for such experiences. What other experiences are there on the stage of this Universe? A senior person says, 'I have experienced a lot. I have been through the thick and thin.' What is all that about? Either you made money or lost it. Either you derived joy or sorrow

Page #114
464 I am the Soul out of the worldly ties. Well, these are all the experiences of the life. All these experiences were attained with the attachment to the extraneous. But the detached state of the atma could not be experienced In truth, atma is only detached, but the jiva can experience that state only if it rests in its true original form of the self. The great poet Banarasidas says while describing this detached state of the atma - jabahI taiM cetana vibhAvasauM ulaTi Apu, samai pAI apanau subhAu gahi lInau. hai tabahI taiM jo jo lene joga so so saba lInau, jo jo tyAga joga so so saba chAMDi dInau hai. lebekau na rahI Thaura tyAgivekauM nAMhi aura, bhAkI kahA ubarayau ju kAraju navInau hai. saMga tyAgi aMga tyAgi vacana taraMga tyAgi, mana tyAgi buddhi tyAgi ApA suddha kinau hai. Since the time the atma has given up the transition into the affected disposition and accepted the natural disposition of the self, it has absorbed all that is worthy of absorbing and abandoned all that is fit for being abandoned. Now nothing that needs to be absorbed or to be abandoned has remained pending, and neither anything new worth doing remains to be done. All possessions, body, and waves of speech have been given up, all doubts have been given up, intellect abandoned and the atma has been cleansed. This is the detached state. This indeed is the original form of the atma. The jiva can experience this state when it becomes introspective. Gurudev says, 'O Disciple! If in spite of thus being in a detached form, the atma is not coming into your experience, it is certain that it is impure, blemished and attached and hence also a doer of karmas.'

Page #115
I am the Soul 465 One more of the disciple's doubts remains : '... or is it the inspiration of Eshwar', so saying he is trying to say that the doer of karmas is not the jiva but the Eshwar. Gurudev clarifies that doubt - kartA Izvara koI nahi, Izvara zuddha svabhAva; 37a da at et, $ur sto wyra .....919 First of all it is essential to consider as to who can be called Eshwar - God. Those philosophies, which believe in God, believe Him to be the Supreme and a unique power. Indeed, one who has acquired a vast aishwarya - wealth, is Eshwar. Wealth is not material riches but the spiritual, unlimited, blissful state - that is the aishwarya of Eshwar, the wealth of God. One who has attained such a state has attained the pure, most pure natural disposition of the self. Eshwar, who possesses such a power, will not transit into the affected disposition for even a single moment. He always enjoys the bliss of the own infinite wealth. Brothers! One who has attained the ultimate pure state is always in the wonderful trance of the supreme bliss. He is so engrossed in enjoying it that he does not desire to come out of it at all. The joy that even a multimillionaire holding immense material wealth cannot experience, is the joy that Eshwar experiences. This is because a man may have unlimited wealth, but he cannot enjoy all of it. There is a limit to whatever he can enjoy out of the wealth that he has. There may be the urge within him to enjoy everything, but time and energy fall so short that he just cannot. But the pure atma, which has attained the spiritual wealth, enjoys all the spiritual prowess, that is, it is experiencing the various characteristics like infinite knowledge etc., from time to time. Indeed, this experience is so deep that the atma does not come out of it at all. When the true form of Eshwar is such, then why would He abandon His own bliss of the self and become the doer of the

Page #116
466 I am the Soul jivas' karmas? For a moment, if we were to accept that He comes out of His trance and inspires the jivas to do karma, then the question arises - why did such a wish occur in Him? If we were to say that He got tired and bored there and felt like doing something, would it not be a great accusation on Eshwar? Even a sadhaka atma, involved in the tremendous effort of the pursuit of the self keeps the effort on for years with unabated enthusiasm, without getting tired or bored, so if one who has already attained the totality gets tired or bored of that state, that one will get categorised as an ordinary human. In fact, one who has the satisfaction of having done everything is Eshwar! Somebody who still has something to do is not Eshwar! Eshwar is sans desire. One more question! If it were Eshwar inspiring karma in a jiva, then why would He inspire one to do good karma and another to do bad, one to do punya and another to do papa? If He does so, would he not be called partial? An ordinary understanding person too is not partial towards any one, then how can Eshwar who possesses wonderful power, be partial towards jivas? Why, if the sinner suffers, would Eshwar derive enjoyment out of it? Would Eshwar ever wish that somebody do karma at His inspiration and suffer for it? Indeed, do we consider Eshwar the creator of the Universe or has the Universe made Eshwar; for nothing can be created without somebody creating it. There again comes the question as to who made Eshwar? If there is another Eshwar who made this one, then again the same question! Thus there would be no end to the question. And if we accept that Eshwar was self-made, then what is the objection to believing that the Universe was also created on its own? Thus there would be many doubts arising. Looking at it in the complete perspective, there is no way in which Eshwar's act is involved. If Eshwar were accepted as the

Page #117
I am the Soul 467 doer of Karma, then He would not remain Eshwar, but become an ordinary human, and an ordinary human does not have the capacity to inspire anybody to do karma. Gurudev has clarified the doubt in the mind of the disciple and explained that Eshwar is not the doer of Karma. After having clarified all these doubts, what then is the true state of the atma, until when is the atma a karta (doer) and after when is the atma a non-doer - akarta, how he is himself ordinary and how he himself becomes the Eshwar, will be the topics of further clarification ...

Page #118
When chetan is aware of the Self... Devoted pursuit of the three gems gradually stabilises the jiva in the state of natural disposition. This natural disposition gradually grows to such a state that jiva's activity ceases. Is the atma, the doer of karma or not? This question raised so many doubts in the disciple's mind and Gurudev has, in very simpie and straight-forward words, clarified all those doubts. The disciple's questions were based on vyavahara naya, so Gurudev too offered the replies with vyavahara nuya. Jiva is independent. Its transition is also independent. Keeping this truth in mind, now Gurudev is trying to explain the non-doer status of arma through niscaya naya - cetana jo nija bhAnamA, kartA Apa svabhAva; at the FAST 1441, chat and mura .....00 O you Disciple, who are curious of knowing the fundamental! I had said that karma occurs because of chetan's inspiration, but that is true only as far as the chetan's extrovert existence goes. If the chetan is existing only in its own disposition, its own awareness; that is if it is engrossed in its own knowledge, faith, prowess and joy etc., then it has no bondage of karma. A jiva in the state of aradhana is free of attachment etc. Where there is attachment etc., there is the bondage of karma, therefore an aradhaka jiva does not attract karma! What is aradhana? Broadly speaking, traversing the path of Dharma is aradhana. Then what is Dharma. We call the rituals and vows as Dharma - religion. A person who follows all these is called dharmishtha - religious. We ourselves believe ourselves to be dharmishtha and desire that others too believe us so. But who is dharmishtha? Dharma + ishtha - one who likes nothing but Dharma is a dharmishtha. Dharma does not mean external

Page #119
I am the Soul 469 rituals but the Dharma of the self. Self is the atma. One who like the Dharma of atma, the natural disposition of utma, is a dharmishta. In Gita, it has been said - svadharme nidhanaM zreyaH paradharmo bhayAvahaH This is a very meaningful verse. In the broader sense, this verse only means that it is better die in one's own Dharma, for another's Dharma is reason to fear. The communal school of thought will translate this as - one should be prepared to die for the faith that our family-tradition has been following and that even looking at another faith evokes fear. Brothers! This meaning is bound to create a rift among communities. A Jain will say, my religion is the true religion and all others are false. In the same way, others following other religions will also say the same. The one calling another religion as false is bound to invite clashes. Then is the verse from Gita poisoning the minds of people? But, Brothers! Only the ignorant ones who do not understand the verse, who do not know the definition of true Dharma, and who mistake community for Dharma, can make such a meaning of this introspective verse. Lord Krishna had not meant so. Communalism is not Dharma. The faith of the family-tradition is not Dharma. The sect that our forefathers followed, that sect is not religion. Here, the word swa-t-, self is meaning atma. The pure and natural disposition of the atma is the Dharma of the self. It is here that we have to settle and to die in the Dharma of the self. Death in the Dharma of the self leads to nirvana. Therefore, it is preferable. That means, Lord Krishna says that before you die attain the Dharma of the self, and then die so that the wandering through lives is avoided. PER - paradharma - whatever there is other than the utma is para and its natural disposition is Dharma. Being engrossed in extraneous substances is paradharma. Expecting happiness

Page #120
470 I am the Soul from extraneous substances is paradharma. Affection for inanimate things and attachment with senses is paradharma. Similarly, the feelings of attachment etc. are all inanimate. We not only indulge in those feelings but also are very much attached to them. The belief that the feelings of attachment and aversion are the natural disposition of the self and that they are worthy of harbouring, is fearsome. That is why Lord Krishna says that if we continue to perform paradharma thinking it is the Dharma of the self, it is like a mine of great misfortune. The jiva has struggled until now. The reason that the jiva continued to do karma and suffer it is also that it has found the feelings of attachment etc., which are the Dharma of the inanimate, as very dear. Jiva has never disunited itself from those feelings nor thought that this is not my Dharma but quite apart from this 'I am the atma'. So the characteristics of atma are my Dharma and the tremendous effort to make them manifest is the activity of Dharma. One who understands this Dharma of the self, stabilises in its awareness. Srimadji has said - cetana jo nija bhAnamAM, kartA Apa svabhAva 'if chetan were to be aware of the self, it would perform only in the natural disposition'. If atma were not dwelling in the feelings of attachment etc., and dwelling within the self, then there would be a stability in it. Where there is a performance of the feelings of attachment etc., there is instability. This instability creates a vibration in the area of atma and due to these vibrations the karma paramanus get attached. This is the bondage of karma. If there were stability in the atma, then however many karma paramanus there may be in the external akasha-pradesh, they cannot advance on to the atma. There can be no karmic bondage. In such a situation, the atma transits only in its natural disposition i.e. in the states of knowledge etc. It remains engrossed in the experience of the natural disposition of the self. Therefore it may be said that it is the doer of its own natural disposition..

Page #121
I am the Soul 471 Moreover, by saying - at the FTG MAT, saf saf yra - the atma is not in its original disposition, when it is a doer of karma under the influence of karma', Srimadji is establishing that according to Vyavahara Naya, atma is also a doer of karma. The moment atma ventures out of its own natural disposition, it begins to do karma. Venturing out of the natural disposition is going into affected disposition. The transition of atma's knowledge is continuous on some subject or the other. It is best if it is in the natural disposition, but if it is not, then it is bound to be in an affected disposition, in the inanimate disposition. It takes the five senses and the mind as the sixth, for company and wanders around the world. Actually, the pitiable inanimate mind wanders anywhere. It has no control over things. What feelings can the inanimate have? It does not have to go anywhere and enjoy any thing. Whatever the mind comes across, it cannot enjoy them. But the feeling is in the knowledge of the atma. Atma uses the mind as a medium and wanders about in fourteen Rajjulokas, and then the mind has to bear the scorn. Anandaghanji Maharaj has also censured the mind. He says - Tutit, arte, cafa, Juus, 20 YTT FTE, sApa khAye ne mukhaDaM thothu, eha ukhANo nyAya - ho kuMthujina This mind, unmindful of whether it is night or day, whether a place is inhabited or deserted, unworried about the limits of heaven or hell, keeps wandering everywhere. The mind gets nothing out of this wandering. Brothers! Anandghanji Maharaj has said the same thing. What does the inanimate mind get? The transition of knowledge turns perverse and goes bouncing about along with the mind. As a result it also derives some feeling that instigates affected disposition. The feelings of attachment etc. are nurtured. The jiva in its affected disposition seeks happiness in them. But the

Page #122
472 I am the Soul inanimate mind does not have the ability to feel. As such, however much it may wander, it does not gain anything at all. I would even say that if the inanimate mind understands and gives up the company of the wandering transition of knowledge, it would not have to bear the vagaries of the world. In truth the inanimate mind can not pull away the transitional knowledge to anywhere. But when the knowledge itself ventures out without remaining in the atma, it cannot absorb any subject without a medium. It is therefore, that it uses the senses and the mind as a medium and wanders freely. When such a wandering occurs, it becomes the doer of karmas. It creates all those flaws which do not exist within itself. Therefore, Gurudev has said that the atma loses its self consciousness and becomes impure due to the blemishes of karma. Thus the status of karma as a doer has been proved through vyavahara naya. At the same time, various beliefs of other faiths, such as - 'atma is totally free of bondage and it is nature that binds it, karmas flow in naturally, doing karmas is the natural disposition of a jiva, karmas get bonded at the inspiration of Eshwar', and so on, have been clarified with irrefutable logic. Similarly, according to niscaya naya, atma can do nothing at all in the world, it is not even capable of doing. The world is inanimate, and the atma is chetan - animate, they both can do nothing for each other. But when the atma loses its sense and tries to enter an affected disposition like the inanimate along with the inanimate, then it becomes the doer of karma. But according to niscaya naya, if it remains immersed in its own true form, it becomes the doer of only its own natural disposition and of nothing else. With these explanations offered by the Gurudev, the disciple's doubts were all dispelled. The atma's stature as a doer

Page #123
I am the Soul 473 has got registered well in his faith and he therefore beautifully places his own understanding before the Gurudev. - trIjuM pada te mAro AtmA ja kartA vyavahAra nayane AdhIna . . . . vyavahAre kartA karmano jaNAya paNa nizcaye svarUpAdhIna. . . . . mArI . . . . The faith about the three statements has awakened fully within. Now the doubts about the fourth statement shall be dealt with in the following pages . . .

Page #124
... then there remains no zone of suffering! The pursuit of three gems brings spiritual attainment. No effort goes without a fruit. There is always a fruit for effort. In the spiritual field, the fruit of devotion is attainment - siddhi. Siddhi is the state of siddha. Another meaning of siddhi is a miraculous power. Yogis can attain such powers through a specific type of yoga practice. This power is lying dormant within all jivas. It does not become apparent without an effort. Indeed, not everybody is aware that such powers could be stored within one self! As such, people are surprised to see such powers in somebody. But anybody who wants can attain such powers through an effort. The value of miraculous powers is limited to the material world. They do not lead to any spiritual elevation nor a purification of the soul. On the contrary, putting such powers to use for material gains diverts the atma from the path of moksa. That is why the real sadhakas do not ever use their powers. One such anecdote is connected with the life of the great yogi, Anandaghanji. He used to remain in uninhabited forests, immersed in the bliss of the soul. He worried none about the world. One day, when he was swaying under a tree, in a state of spiritual bliss, a sanyasi came with some bottle in his hand, and said - "Maharaj! My Gurudev has sent you this solution that can make gold; it is created from the juices of various herbs." "Who is your Gurudev?" "Maharaj! Your friend from yesteryears. He is now a sanyasi." "What for has this been sent?" "This solution is a great miracle! It will be very useful for you.".

Page #125
I am the Soul "For me! Of what use is it to me?" "Maharaj! Pouring this solution on rock turns rock into gold." 475 "But what do I do with it?" "Aha, Maharaj! Have you not understood? If this solution is with you, thousands of people will come licking your soles." "I left the disciples behind. I have extricated myself from the society which was following me as a devotee and have come here to pursue the supreme and am doing that. Now I do not need disciples and servants!" The sanyasi felt, 'this rustic does not understand. What does he know how valuable this thing is? How would an ape know the taste of sugar?' And he started requesting again. But Anandghanji was the name and he was immersed in the joy of his self. Of what good was this solution to him? And when the stranger would not give up, he picked up the bottle and threw it away. The former watched in dismay. 'Alas! This fellow has reduced my Guru's effort of years to dust.' He began to lament. Anandghanji arose to explain that such attainments were at hand all around us but we do not care for them. To us they are not even worth dirt. He went a little distance and urinated on a rock, and at that moment the rock turned into gold. The stranger was awe-struck. Anandghanji told him - "Pick up this rock! And take it to your Guru! Tell him, you just sent the solution, but I am offering you ready gold. Go gift him on my behalf." The sanyasi turned away with a sorry little face. Brothers! The power of devoted practice is that, when the great men pursue it, on one hand it leads to limitless nirjara of karma. As a result the purity of the self begins to grow and on the other hand, due to the virtuous thoughts, punya is added on

Page #126
476 I am the Soul in great chunks and hence such attainments become manifest. The bodies of Yogis become so purified that even if they excrete or discharge urine, it is contained of power. Sanatkumar Chakravarti's saliva is said to have developed such power that a finger immersed in it is said to have turned an afflicted part of the body into gold-like purity. Brothers! A sadhaka in devoted pursuit gets many such powers, but he is not attracted towards them. Indeed, the pursuit is not of such attainments. If a power is added on effortlessly, it well may, but he does not get attracted by it. A true Guru never offers his disciples the secrets to such enticing pursuits. If the disciple insists and somehow learns such secrets from the Guru, the Guru is regretful for it. A disciple practised devotedly for twelve long years to attain the power to walk on water. After attaining it he went to his Guru with a bouncing heart and proudly told him of his great achievement. The Guru just said, "Son! Did you have to spend twelve precious years of your life after something that a boatman could do for two bits?" Brothers! This is the state of mind of the Indian sadhakas. Here the tradition of devoted practice is merely for the attainment of the atma. In the mind of the curious sadhak, there is an urge to know, understand and experience the atma. That is why in the Atmasiddhi Shastra, Srimadji has included the six statements in the form of doubts and clarifications. Here one of the questions arises along with its answer. How deep is the thinking that has gone into the disciple's question! Such deep questions are not at all likely to arise without a deep thinking. We do know that Srimadji himself raises these questions and himself provides the answers. How deep must have been Srimadji's thinking about the principles, that he could raise such deep questions. Philosophy is not absorbed by merely

Page #127
I am the Soul 477 reading or hearing once, but it has to be studied repeatedly. Only then will awaken the infinite power of knowledge of the atma. The fact that Srimadji had brought along the influences of previous births shows that the knowledge he acquired in those births was assimilated through repeated study and reflection. That is why it remained with the atma as an influence. And it awakened effortlessly in this birth. If an ordinary person begins to think about a principle, his thoughts run for 4-5 seconds and then get stuck. Those thoughts also are not coherent. He does not realise what should be thought next. While a thoughtful person has the thoughts about knowledge etc., running endlessly in him. Srimadji also appeared with the influences of such deep philosophy and hence such an excellent composition could be done by him. Brothers! Let us also listen to the voice of the Veetarag, contemplate over it and influence our soul with it. The reason why we do not have the influence in us today, is that in our previous births we have not done what we should have done. There we have enjoyed the passions and as a result those influences are very deep and the influences of knowledge and faith are not to be seen at all. In this short life there is a lot to be done, let us do it - let us influence the atma with the thoughts of knowledge and faith! Here the disciple is so influenced and hence in his heart there is the curiosity. Having understood three statements there is now a doubt in him that atma is a doer. If it does karma then it must also be suffering them? There is bound to be an effect of karmas done! But what is the scheme that works behind the process of suffering? In spite of a lot of thinking this could not be solved. So he threw his heart open before the benevolent Gurudev -

Page #128
478 jIva karma kartA kaho, paNa bhoktA nahi soya, zuM samaje jaDa karma ke, phaLa pariNAmI hoya ? O Guru! I have accepted that the jiva is the doer of karma. The jiva acquires punya karma through noble thoughts and papa karma through ignoble thoughts. But both punya and papa karmas are inanimate. There is no power of knowledge in them. They themselves are unaware whether they are in the form of punya or papa. Indeed they do not even know that when time is ripe they are supposed to produce a good or bad result. How do the inanimate karmas know that the jiva has done such karmas and it has to be given such and such a result? And the result that the jiva gets is again karma, is it not? If the inanimate karmas are incapable of producing results, then how can it be said that the jiva is the sufferer of the karma-effect? In practice too, the utilisation of inanimate substances and the effect thereof is achieved through our own effort. The inanimate does not produce an effect by itself. We sit down for food, the plate is served, and everyday we eat the food stuff from the same plate. But we are required to pick up a morsel and place it in our mouth. Food does not reach the mouth automatically and offer the effect of satiating hunger. Therefore, the inanimate karmas cannot offer an effect to jiva. Then how can the jiva be called a sufferer? phaLadAtA Izvara gaNye, bhoktApaNuM sadhAya; ema ko IzvarataNuM, IzvarapaNuM ja jAya 79 But if you were to call the jiva the sufferer, then another question is bound to arise - I am the Soul 80 Jain Educationa International Let us presume that the Eshwar is aware of the karmas of all and just as a Judge pronounces sentences from crimes done, Eshwar makes the jivas suffer their karmas - then the suffering of jiva is proved. But having said this, the disciple feels that For Personal and Private Use Only

Page #129
I am the Soul 479 believing Eshwar to be the provider of effect, the true form of Eshwar will be damaged. The infinite number of jivas of this universe, except for the Siddhas, are all with karma. Each jiva has to suffer the effect of karma from time to time. Eshwar will have to offer the effect to each jiva from time to time. Now if Eshwar were to get involved with this then he would be constantly affected. Eshwar means a liberated atma. He is merely a doer of his own true disposition. He is engaged in his own true form. But if it were to be engaged in the activity of offering results of karmas to jivas, then there appears the doer nature of extraneous thoughts. If in keeping an account of the karmas of so many jivas, he himself gets smeared with karma, then his status of Eshwar cannot last. If the status of Eshwar is not in him, then he is like any common animate being. Then he too would entail karma and who would make him suffer the result of his karmas? Thus this leads to a lot of chaos. Therefore, Eshwar is also not capable of offering the result of karma to jivas. He does not come out of his Eshwar status and offer any result. If that is the case, then the status of sufferer will not be proved at all. Therefore, the disciple says - Izvara siddha thayA vinA, jagata niyama nahi hoya; TEST TATTH THAI, TT P r e .....68 O Gurudev! Eshwar means the complete person. The supreme soul of pure true disposition and sans all emotions. Such an Eshwar cannot be proved to be the giver of results to jivas. He does not get involved with the affairs of the material world. It is easy to say so, but then how does the mechanism of this world run so smoothly, who runs it? We observe that all the activity of the universe - nature follows a set of rules. The rise and setting of Sun, the climatic cycles, the days and nights, the movement of the planets, the growing of trees, the flowing of a

Page #130
480 I am the Soul stream, such activity is regularly happening. Even this would not be there. By the same law, the places like heaven and hell designated for the jivas to suffer their good or bad karmas, would not exist. If the jiva does not have the place itself to suffer the karmas, then how would it have the status of sufferer? The disciple is deeply influenced by the concept that the scheme of the universe cannot operate without Eshwar. So also that the sufferance of karma can happen only if some mediating power is instrumental and not otherwise. Such are the doubts that have arisen in the mind of the disciple regarding the status of sufferer of karma - effects. He says, 'O Gurudev! Please have mercy upon me! You are ever benevolent. Please lead me by hand out of this darkness of ignorance. Please support me!' At the request of the disciple, the Guru is prepared to offer the clarifications to the doubts raised by him. What the clarifications are we will soon know ..

Page #131
The karma in thought is of its own volition .. The devoted pursuit of the three gems enables the jiva to experience the bliss of the pure natural state. From time infinite, the jiva has believed in the perverse joy having been transformed into the impure state. The jiva never faced the self and as such could not enjoy the pure blemish-less bliss. Progressing on the path of devoted practice, jiva becomes self-oriented and attempts to transform into the self. As a result of which all extraneous feelings get abandoned. The self tries to settle down in the self. It becomes peaceful. Yearning for such a state, the disciple places several doubts before the Gurudev. Is the jiva the sufferer of the effect of karma or not? This is the doubt in the mind of the disciple. He has placed it before the Gurudev. Before we understand it, let us consider the ways in which the state of suffering can occur in an atma. Just as the doer nature of atma was considered from both vyavahara and niscaya naya, the state of suffering too can occur under both circumstances. 1. From the Vyavahara naya viewpoint - In a way, the jiva is the sufferer of the joys and sorrows and things resulting from the substances that form the subject of the senses. Everybody has experienced either joy or sorrow due to the senses absorbing some substances. Just as - 'I heard this music and enjoyed it very much; I saw this and didn't like it at all'. Here the enjoyment is the happiness and the dislike is the sorrow. Such a suffering is continuously on. Even by acquiring substances, joys and sorrows have to be suffered. 2. Again from the same Vyavahara naya viewpoint - In another way, Jiva is the sufferer of the joys and sorrows that result from the good effects or ill-effects of the rising of the karma

Page #132
482 I am the Soul - karma uday. With the rise of punya there are favourable circumstances and with the rise of papa there are adverse circumstances which have to be borne. The jiva being subject to karma, flows along with the rise of the karma - karma uday - and hence is subject to suffering the joys and sorrows that result from the uday 3. From impure niscaya naya viewpoint - Chetan is the sufferer of attachment and aversion in the form of thought. Attachment and aversion are affected disposition, which arise in the refuge of the chetan. Therefore they are in animate - chetan form. Their sufferer is the jiva. The Jiva experiences attachment and so also aversion. 4. From pure niscaya naya viewpoint - The fundamental characteristics of the jiva are anantajnana, anantadarshan, anantavirya and anantasukha, and the jiva enjoys them. The characteristics are transitory at every moment. The Jiva experiences them and hence the jiva is the sufferer of the thoughts. 5. From ultra-pure niscaya naya viewpoint - jiva is a nonsufferer. This naya does not recognise a difference between the suffering and the sufferer. It merely accepts the pure detached true natural disposition. The jiva happens to remain eternally in its own pure true natural disposition and hence it is a non-sufferer. Thus, having mentioned the status of the atma as a sufferer - non-sufferer under vyavahara and niscaya naya, the Guru now clarifies the disciple's doubt - bhAva karma nija kalpanA, mATe cetana rUpa; vita aletit MUTT, TEUTO SYU ......? Karma is of three types - 1. Bhavakarma, 2. Dravyakarma and 3. Nokarma. The transition of the atma through attachment and aversion is bhavakarma. In spite of attachment and aversion being in the

Page #133
I am the Soul 483 form of passions, they arise in the chetan atma and hence they have been called bhavakarma. As a result of this bhavakarma the pudgalas of karmic category are attracted to the atma in the form of a dravya - substance. Hence they have been called dravyakarma. The body that results from both these is the nokarma. Attachment and aversion are the passionate feelings of the atma. Even the attachment and aversion that we experience is only by way of feelings. The attachment - affection that we hold within us towards a person or thing, can be experienced only on the inside. It cannot be shown outside in the form of a substance. Of course, from the acts that go into nurturing the feeling of attachment, the attachment can be known or measured. But attachment cannot be seen. Same goes for aversion. It can also be felt inside but cannot be shown. The acts of aversion can be recognised, can be seen but the reason for these acts, the aversion itself cannot be known. Thus attachment and aversion are expressed in feelings - bhava - and they are the passions of the atma, hence they are bhavakarma. They are in fact, created out of the ignorance of the atma. There is no attachment etc., in the state of knowledge. When the atma descends from the natural disposition of knowledge, the ignorance, that prevails in the form of rising karmas, creates several perversions, among them are attachment and aversion. Since they are generating from the ignorance of the jiva, attachment and aversion are considered as chetan - animate. When the atma, in spite of being filled with peace, does not remain in the state of knowledge, its own energy - virya becomes vibrant. This atma possesses anantavirya - infinite energy. The farther away the atma gets from its natural disposition, the more this energy gets released and the mind, speech and bodily yogas of the jiva turn fickle. The fickleness of the yogas does not allow the atma to remain stable. The atma develops vibrations and

Page #134
484 I am the Soul this vibration attracts the karmic pudgala in the atmosphere and converts them into karma. Thus the atma itself, due to its ignorance, becomes the doer of karma. When the atma is engaged in the state of knowledge, swaying in the engrossment of its own true form as a samyagdarshi - of true faith, the infinite energy - anantavirya - that resides in the infinite area of the atma gets elated, and introverted and discharges millions of karma - koti karma nirjara - at such times. It creates a sort of feeling of joy in the jiva which leads the jiva at a very fast pace to a state of total karma discharge. : The positive tremendous effort of the jiva utilises the atma's energy - atmavirya - for discharge of karma, while the negative effort earns infinite karma with the help of the atmavirya. Here Gurudev is meaning to convey that the bhavakarmas of attachment and aversion arise in the shelter of chetan and become instrumental in the formation of karmas, which are inanimate. And therefore, according to Vyavahara Naya atma becomes the doer of karmas. The purpose of saying all this here is that if the jiva is thus becoming the doer of karma, then it will also become the sufferer of karma. Bhava karmas attract Dravya karmas. As a result of the rise of the Dravya Karmas, the jiva begets this body form. Externally too, the activity of the body and the organs takes shape. It is this activity that leads to attachment and aversion and results in bondage of karma. Thus this whole wheel continues to turn. The root cause of all this is ignorance. The atma has to suffer karma as long as there is ignorance. The moment ignorance quits, the soul will become the doer-sufferer of the own natural disposition. Gurudev developed this background to explain how the inanimate karmas can affect the animate. In spite of the Karmas being inanimate, as long as they reside in the same area as the

Page #135
I am the Soul 485 soul, they derive the power of the animate. They utilise this power to get their work done. Karma misleads the animate atma and draws power from it. That is when the animate gets enticed by the inanimate, not otherwise. It is our experience that we are living in a state of selfillusion. That is why the Karmas are able to overpower us. How else could the inanimate karmas ride the infinitely strong atma? The karmas mislead the atma and extract their purpose. In the same way they mislead the atma and present the good-bad effects. Now Gurudev explains how the inanimate karmas present the results to the atma.

Page #136
Cannot differentiate between poison and nectar... The devoted pursuit of the three gems is a tremendous effort for attaining the supreme. The jiva has not attained the supreme until now. It remains immersed in the pursuit of material achievements for the body. The jiva is unaware that a spiritual joy, greater than the joys of body, mind and senses, can be found somewhere. How can one, who has never heard such words as 'atma' and 'parmatma' ever know that 'I am the atma' and 'I am also the supreme soul' and that 'I can make my supreme state manifest'? Brothers! The jiva will harbour as many desires as has been his progress in any field. There may, of course, be many desires in his own field. Like the people of the many tiny hamlets of our country, which are situated in the deep interior and far from the cities, have not even seen a train. Why! They don't even know that such a transport exists which could take people from one village to another at a great distance. They will not even get the thought of boarding a train, so how can they ever think of boarding an airplane? Being ignorant of the discoveries made by science today, the desire never arises in them to seek comfort with any sort of scientific appliances. We are no different from these unsophisticated villagers. We are settled only in the region of the body and senses. How can we ever get out of them and realise that I am the atma, the master of the endless powers, or being unaware that 'there is a great treasure of joy filled in my own atma' how can we make attempts to attain such an unknown joy of the soul? But we are very fortunate that even in such adverse times, we have found both - treatises in the form of Veetaraag's voice and the company of the sages; with the Gurudev really assuring us that the atma can be realised with our own state of knowledge..

Page #137
I am the Soul 487 Therefore, let us give up our passions for the material world and make an effort for the attainment of the atma. So far, we have enjoyed many worldly pleasures but now it is time to experience the joy of the atma. The pleasures of the world may taste sweet but in effect they are bitter poison. It has been said in our treatises jahA kimpAga phalANaM, pariNAmo na sundaro / evaM bhuttANaM bhogANaM pariNAmo na sundaro / / Similarly khamitta sukkhA bahukAladukkhA . The beautiful looking fruits of the Kimpak tree have a poisonous effect when eaten. In the same way, the pleasures of the body and senses taste sweet while enjoying. A momentary illusion of joy is experienced but the result is a sorrow for a long time. So Brothers! The jiva enjoys the passions generated by the senses and sensual subjects in a state of ignorance. But the same jiva, when able to awaken the state of knowledge beyond ignorance, begins to experience the natural disposition that rests within. All the material things, all the senses, a strong body will not have any relevance once the detachment arises within. That is how Emperor Bharat, the master of all powers, managed to attain moksa in the same birth. The material things that lead to enjoyment are inanimate and cannot attract the jiva; it is the jiva which likes to enjoy attachment and aversion. It gets involved with the feelings of attachment etc., and therefore gets attracted to the pleasures and enjoys them. This has been the practice of the jiva from time immemorial. The inquisitive disciple, whose mind is trying to detach itself from the worldly enjoyment, is keen to know what, in view of the principle, is the role of the jiva in enjoyment. He has accepted that jiva is the doer of karma but at the same time he has also

Page #138
488 I am the Soul learnt that karma is inanimate. How can inanimate karmas be capable of offering any fruit? In trying to clear this doubt, Gurudev has explained in the previous gatha how jiva is the doer of karma. If the chetan is instrumental in the doing of karma, it is also instrumental in suffering it. Having established this logic, now he goes on to explain how the inanimate karmas can offer results - jhera sudhA samaje nahIM, jIva khAya phaLa thAya; ema zubhAzubha karmanuM, bhoktApaNuM jaNA 83 Son! It is noticed in practice that the effect of inanimate things is quite substantial. Even if we were to consider a commonplace example, we see the effect of the daily meals on the body. The items of food are inanimate, yet they generate strength, blood and fat in the body. A man remains alive on the strength of food consumed. Many food items are opiate too. You begin to feel drowsy soon as you get up from a heavy meal. You may not want to rest, but will be forced to sleep. This is the result of food items on body. How influenced a person gets after consuming alcoholic drinks! He loses consciousness; even a sane person begins to act absurd, his knowledge giving way. A patient on the operation table is rendered almost lifeless after the doctor administer anaesthesia. He doesn't realise at all if any of the body parts is cut open. What a tremendous effect on the atma! Where is the atma, which can sense even a minute pin-prick and now cannot feel a thing when the body is fully cut open? The atma is very much there, but the knowledge has been placed in a state of total sleep induced by this substance and thus cannot sense a thing. In the same way, if a man eats poison he dies, and if he eats a good stuff which is called nectar, it will lead to enhancing the strength of his body and life.

Page #139
I am the Soul 489 All the things that we referred to are inanimate yet we have experienced their effect on the body. Among those, it is not as if the poison will have effect only if consumed with full knowledge. Even when consumed without knowledge, it is bound to have effect. Just as all these effects occur on the body, mind, knowledge and the ability of the atma to feel, the good or evil karmas also have effect on the atma. Let us look at the process of karma bondage in detail in order to understand this. The specific relation of atma and the karmic atoms is called bandha. Bandha is of four types - Prakriti bandha, Stithi bandha, Rasabandha and Pradeshabandha. Prakriti Bandha - The meaning of the term Prakriti is the original disposition. Therefore, the disposition that develops in the various karmas to undermine knowledge etc., is called Prakritibandha. Such as - Jnanavarniya, Darshanavarniya, Vedaniya, Mohaniya, Ayushya, Nam, Gotra and Antaraya. These are the eight dispositions that develop in the karmas. Due to association with the jiva and as a result of passionate feelings, when the karmic particles turn into karma, they develop four characteristics - 1. Natural disposition, 2. State, 3. Ability to provide results, and 4. Scale. Among these the natural disposition and scale are dependent on the ability of the Prakritibandha and Pradeshabandha jiva to interact and the state and ability to provide results is dependent on the Stithibandha and Rasabandha jiva's passionate feelings. The natural disposition and scale of the Karmic pudgals which are entrapped are as intense or feeble as the strength of interaction. Their state and ability to provide results are as intense or feeble as the passionate feelings of the jiva. Thus in the first Prakritibandha, the karmas result into Jnanavarana and other forms.

Page #140
490 I am the Sou! Pradesha Bandha - One atom of Pudgal is called a Pradesha and hence the scale of those pudgal-groups which transform into karmas is measured in atoms. For e.g. X number of pudgal groups containing Y number of atoms, have transformed into the karmas of a certain jiva. This is called Pradesha Bandha. Those pudgal groups which transform into karma are called karma-vargana skandha. This universe is filled to the brim with pudgal astikaya. These pudgals are divided into various categories. One among them is the karman vargana category. It is this karman vargana which transforms into karma by interacting with the jiva and as a result of passionate feelings. But each jiva can absorb only as much karman vargana as is in its immediate proximity. Just as an iron ball heated in fire and thrown into water, absorbs only that water where it falls and not the water at distance. In the same way the jiva too absorbs only those karman varganas which are situated in the same space as the jiva is in. In fact, just as the iron ball attracts water from all sides as it is thrown into water, the jiva too absorbs karmas from all spaces of atmas. Just as food in the stomach gradually transforms into fluids, blood etc., the karman varganas, which a jiva constantly absorbs also get distributed into as many parts as the karmas that are due to become entrapped. The bondage of ayushya karma is never permanent. It is always momentary and once in a lifetime. The karma pudgalas which are absorbed at that moment are split into eight parts. If ayushya is not being added then they split into seven. In the tenth gunasthana, ayushya and mohaniya are left out and only six-way split occurs. In the thirteenth gunasthana only one karma is entrapped and hence the absorbed pudgala remains in one form.

Page #141
I am the Soul 491 Let us see how the division of the karma pudgalas occurs. The part of ayushya karma is the smallest, for its state is shorter than all other karmas. The parts of nama and gotra karmas are bigger than the ayushya karma because the state of ayushya karma is 33 sagaropama while the nama-gotra state is 20 krodakroda sagars. These two get equal parts. Jnanavarniya, darshanavarniya and antaraya have a state longer than namagotra, i.e. 30 krodakroda sagars and hence these three get a part larger than nama-gotra. The part of mohaniya karma is larger than these three for its state is of 70 krodakroda sagars. The largest part is that of vedaniya karma. Although the state of vedaniya karma is much less than that of mohaniya karma, the part vedaniya gets is larger because without a substantial amount of karma pudgalas the joys and sorrows that result from vedaniya cannot be clearly experienced. Vedaniya can effectively play its part only with more pudgalas and hence in spite of its state being shorter it gets the largest part. Stithi Bandha - After being entrapped, the time span for which a karma is bonded to an atma is its period of Stithi. The ascertaining of this period of stithi in the karmas that are getting bonded is called stithibandha. Stithi is of two types - jaghanya and utkrushta. The lowest of the low stithi is jaghanya and the highest of the high stithi is utkrushta. Stithi has been bifurcated in yet another way. The period until which the karmas do not arise, yet remain with the atma after being bonded, is the abadhakal and after arising, the period during which they remain active is called the stithi. The abadhakal is equivalent to as many centuries as the sagaropama period of the utkrushta stithi of a karma. Rasa Bandha - The ability to provide results that resides in the entrapped karma pudgalas is called Rasa bandha. Until getting bonded with jivas, the karmic atoms do not have any particular rasa in them. They are nirasa and uniform. But when

Page #142
492 I am the Soul they get absorbed by a jiva, the passionate feelings in a jiva contribute to the karmic atoms developing infinite rasa. Rasabandha is that which destroys the gunas - virtues of a jiva. Just as hay is tasteless and bland but when it gets into the stomachs of different animals and turns into milk it develops varying density and fat content, guna varies too. This difference is noticeable in the milk of cow, buffalo and goat. Similarly, the passionate feelings have varying intensity in various jivas when they absorb karma. As a result, the rasa, which manifests the ability of karmas to provide results, also varies in intensity and when it arises, it provides results as either intense or feeble rasa. Rasa or the sub-part is of two types. Intense and feeble. These sub-parts are present in both good and evil dispositions. The rasa in good disposition has been given the simile of sugarcane juice for it is enjoyable like the sweet and tasty sugarcane juice. The rasa in evil disposition is compared with neem juice. Neem juice is bitter and so also the fruits of evil disposition are sorrowful. In both these rasas there are varying degrees of growth and reduction, they are intense, more intense, most intense and feeble, more feeble and most feeble - which are called shadguna hani-vriddhi. Thus the jiva suffers for its karmas in a certain disposition, at a certain place, on a certain scale, for a certain period in a certain intense or feeble form. The passionate feelings of the jiva and medium of the nature of its interaction are the main reasons for these four types of bondage. When a jiva gets into an affected disposition, it begins to nurture passionate feelings and its interaction gets affected in the refuge of those various feelings. Just as the animate atma plays a role in doing the karmas, it is also present at the time of the rise of karmas as a result of the transformation of the inanimate karmic atoms into karmas. Only those karmas which had got attached to the atma have risen and

Page #143
I am the Soul 493 none other. Therefore, those karmas are also capable of providing results. An inanimate thing cannot do anything by itself, but if a human or bird or animal or some jiva provides momentum, there is a great strength even in the inanimate. This is not at all difficult to understand in today's scientific age. The ultimate part of pudgala is an atom, what can it do on its own? In spite of being endowed with immense strength, it cannot do any thing because it is inanimate. But when the same strength of the atom was harnessed and experimented upon, it produced the most destructive energy in this world and also developed the positive energy that could provide cures for so many major ailments. The inanimate energies have been mastered in so many other ways which are now proving useful to mankind. Therefore, Gurudev says that a substance may not itself know but the strength that resides in it is still effective. In the same way the good and evil karmas are also capable of providing results to a jiva. Karmas residing on an atma produce results the moment they ripen after their given period. And after producing results they get detached from the atma on their own. Thus the jiva is the doer and sufferer of karma. Other logical arguments that prove the fact that atma suffers karma will soon follow ...

Page #144
Effect cannot be without cause ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems makes the jiva realise the divergence due to affected disposition and helps attain the uni-form by bringing it out of the multi-form. The original form of the jiva is one and undivided yet there appears a great diversity among the infinite living beings in this world. In the human form, in spite of all humans being similar, with the same body-frame, not one human is found identical to another. Occasionally, if there does appear a similarity between two humans, it would be one in crores. Perhaps twins would look similar. Yet if observed closely there would be some differences. Hands, legs, eyes, ears, nose and mouth may all be in their place and proportionate, yet there would be a difference in their appearance. In the same way, considering the body, this difference is found among birds and animals too. Such diversity is noticed in the world considering the body. From the view of the mind too, there appears a great diversity among jivas with minds. They all may have found a similar appearing mind made of inanimate pudgals, but every mind has a different working pattern. Some person may be deeply affected by a small event. The mind may get upset. Why! It would even invite serious illness as a result. While many people have such minds that the most sorrowful situation cannot disturb them. From another viewpoint, the state of the mind is different among everybody. Tastes and preferences also differ. One person may find a certain thing or certain person very likeable while another might dislike the same thing or the same person most. Such feelings of likes or dislikes are present in each mind in a variety. Progressing further, we notice a different stand in everybody on faith, although they all may be sitting together in prayer. There

Page #145
I am the Soul 495 may be a chant of Bhaktamar Stotra - the eulogy of Bhagawan Rishabhdev - but the extent of devotion towards Bhagawan arising in each mind would differ. One may be experiencing the joy of being immersed in the feeling of devotion while another may be chanting for the sake of it. The feelings of prayer would not even be touching the heart. There may be many sitting in together for Samayik - the devoted effort to seek equanimity. One person may attain equanimity within while performing Samayik. It may remain only for a little while but it can certainly be experienced. While another may attain more and attempt to practice equanimity in life too. Yet another person may never understand equanimity even after performing many Samayiks. In the same way, everybody does not see the same results of the various religious rituals-vows-penance-chants-devotion-selfstudy etc. Every jiva has its own different result. Often, the same reason, a minor fault on somebody's part, leads a person to terrible anger and high excitement, while another responds very calmly and the same reason does not disturb that person at all. Not just this, Brothers! We all have experienced that a minor reason sometimes affects us very seriously. We start fretting and fuming with anger. We break ties and vow not to speak again. We get disturbed and try to upset the entire situation. But sometimes when confronted with the same reason or something even more serious we remain silent. The mind is not affected at all, we ignore it. When you think about this behaviour, we ourselves feel sorry for our own unusual behaviour and wonder 'why so?' I made such a hue and cry over somebody's petty mistake and here when there is such a great loss, my mind was not affected at all. On both the occasions, the same person was

Page #146
496 I am the Soul at fault and the same person, that is myself, was observing. Yet, how did my reactions differ so much in both these situations? Thus when taken in the entire perspective, it can be seen that every person has a differing state at differing times. In the same way, many people at the same time have varying unusual behaviour. There is certainly an impetus to all these unusual happenings- it may well not be a direct impetus and could be an indirect impetus, but impetus there has to be. Without cause there cannot be an effect. While explaining this cause-and-effect concept, Gurudev also provides the clarification to the disciple's doubt. The disciple's doubt is that how the jiva could be the doer and the sufferer of karma at the same time. Gurudev says - eka rAMka ne eka nRpa, e Adi je bheda; freut fait taart a, a T4194 aa ....68 O Disciple! In this world, while one is rich another is poor, while one is a scholar another is an idiot, while one is high and mighty another is lowly and all the physical, mental and spiritual disparities mentioned earlier are to be seen in jivas. To all these there is some reason or other. This reason is sometimes visible directly, and sometimes not. When a person works hard and earns money, we tend to believe that the riches he earned were a fruit of his effort. But if in spite of tremendous effort one does not attain joy, means and amenities, then what do we make of it? In practice we say he is unfortunate. What is fortune? The actions in affected disposition in the past are the destiny of the present. Efforts done with positive feelings result in the form of punya, while efforts done with negative feelings result in the build-up of papa. Destiny is not a horoscope drafted by some invisible Maker. It is but the punyapapa of the jiva which it has accumulated over the previous births and brought along in the form of destiny.

Page #147
I am the Soul 497 It is evident from this that the situations through which one is passing at present are all because of the good and evil karmas. Only the karmas of the past are arising and providing their respective results. Not all jivas have similar karmas. Each jiva while in various life forms in different species at various times has accumulated various types of karmas on account of various feelings harboured. Inspired by the rise of those karmas, all jivas being affected in various ways, again accumulate various types of karmas. As an effect of those karmas all jivas undergo different interactions. That is why we notice all these disparities. The karmic atoms, in spite of being inanimate, react in various ways with the jiva acting as the reason. So long as these atoms have not transformed into karmas, there is no difference between them, they are all identical. But the variety of the feelings of attachment and aversion in the jivas brings in a variety in the karmic atoms. In this way, there are infinite categories of atoms in this universe, which of their own independent volition, do not cause any benefit or loss to a jiva. But the jiva absorbs these groups of atoms, and then there occurs a transformation in them and various effects become visible. The atoms naturally join with and separate from each other. So long as it is alone it is an atom. But when two or more atoms get together, they form a group-a skandha. Without any sort of involvement of any jiva, there are infinite skandhas floating about this universe. In such skandhas, certain varying capabilities arise on their own. As a result of this, the skandhas become useful to jivas. Such skandhas are of eight types - 1. Karma category: These are the skandhas which the jiva can absorb with feelings of attachment and aversion and which have the ability to transform into karmas. They remain with the

Page #148
498 I am the Soul atma for a certain period in the form of karma and then after providing the results, detach themselves. They are again useful to the same jiva or any other jiva in the form of karmas. 2. Thought category:Jivas with minds are always thinking. Thoughts are inanimate, in the form of atoms. When a jiva thinks, it first absorbs the pudgal skandhas of thought category from the atmosphere through mind energy, only then can it think. When a thought occurs and moves on, at that very moment the pudgal skandhas of the thought category detach themselves from the jiva. They again get absorbed in the atmosphere. 3. Language category : Those jivas who are equipped with languages, express their thoughts through the language. A language that is formed with words is inanimate. Whenever any human or animal speaks a language, they first absorb the pudgals of the language category with the help of their language capability and then speak. They transform the pudgals into language and then give them up. These atoms of the language category are useful to a jiva in speaking. 4. Respiratory category : For all jivas from uni-sensory to penta-sensory, respiration is most important to live life. All jivas inhale and exhale but we cannot make out. They have different ways of breathing. Plants are uni-sensory jivas. They absorb oxygen and carbon from the air and expel it. This fact has been proved by science too. Along with the air that it breathes, a jiva also absorbs atomic skandhas of the respiratory category. With every inhalation these pudgals are absorbed and with every exhalation they are expelled. 5. Audarik category : Humans and animals have audarik body. The bodies of the sthavar, vigalendriya and panchendriya animals which we can see are all audarik bodies; a body which is by nature subject to degeneration. In fact, what is udar i.e. important body is called audarik. The pudgala skandhas which

Page #149
I am the Soul 499 are used in the making of and maintenance of this body are said to be of audarik category. When this body took shape, it was made out of the audarik skandhas absorbed by the jiva. The baby in mother's womb grows with the nutrition obtained from the mother's body. This nutrition is made up of pudgals of the audarik category. Whatever food is taken after birth in solid or liquid form is all audarik pudgal. Whatever is absorbed through the pores as food is again audarik pudgal. The entire visible inanimate world is made up of atoms of the audarik category. No other pudgals are visible to our eyes in this universe. 6. Vaikriya category : The bodies of jivas in the deva and naraka loka are made up of vaikriya pudgals. These pudgals cannot transform into the seven substances like blood, flesh, nerves etc. They remain only as pudgals. The bodies of deva and naraka residents do not contain blood, flesh etc. A deva body is made up of positive - good - vaikriya pudgals and a naraka body is made up of negative - evil - vaikriya pudgals. Any human can attain this through a devoted effort and then be able to change into various types of large or small forms. The pudgals that facilitate these changing forms are vaikriya pudgals. The devas appearing on the earth take on a different form and that is done through vaikriya pudgals. Wind too has a vaikriya body. It can also take larger or smaller forms. Thus the pudgals, that facilitate formation of various bodies, are of vaikriya category. 7. Aharaka category : Such pudgals are the least in this universe. The power, which the fourteen purvadhari great sages used, while travelling to the place where the kevali paramatma was installed, in quest of clarification of some serious doubts which arose in their minds, is the power of aharaka labdhi.

Page #150
500 I am the Soul Through this labdhi a tiny statue of shubha - good - pudgals is made which travels the long distance to the Kevali Bhagawan, obtains clarification of the doubts and upon return disintegrates. The pudgals used in making such statues are of the aharaka category. This labdhi was available only to the fourteen purvadhari sages and to none others. 8. Avarga category: These are useless pudgal skandhas which are most abundant in the universe. Large and small skandhas of this category roam the atmosphere. They have never been useful to any jiva, nor will be of any use ever. Their existence is limited to being pudgals. They keep on combining and disintegrating. Thus these eight types of atoms-pudgal skandhas have filled the universe to the brim. But until they get a reason in the form of a jiva's feelings, they do not have any effect on the jiva. They are floating on their own. In spite of being inanimate, when they attach to a jiva due to a stimulus provided by the jiva, as a result of the life energy in the atma, they begin to act as if there is life in them too. Similarly, the karmas which reside on an atma, in spite of being inanimate, occupy the same space as that of the atma. As a result they affect the atma. In response to the disciple's doubt as to how the inanimate karmas can provide results to the jiva, Gurudev has explained how the inanimate atoms of pudgals get variously transformed in the refuge of the jiva and what all they can do. All the inanimate powers of the universe that we are putting to use today are all assisted by the power of our own chetana. In the absence of chetan, the inanimate can do absolutely nothing. With chetan's inspiration, the inanimate can do a lot. The proof of this are the disparities earlier mentioned.

Page #151
I am the Soul 501 Thus Gurudev has explained that the inanimate karmas are capable of providing results. Now the disciple has another doubt that perhaps the almighty Eshwar might be playing the role of a Judge in awarding results to a jiva. He needs to know whether that is true or not. Gurudev clarifies that doubt too, as we will soon learn...

Page #152
Karma culminates naturally.. The devoted pursuit of the three gems is by the atma for the attainment of the atma. All efforts until now to attain something were made with the senses, mind or intellect; not with the atma. The experienced sages have indicated devoted pursuit for scrutinising the self with the self. For this purpose, we have to close the external eyes and open the internal eyes. The curious disciple, on account of the knowledge acquired through the senses, mind and intellect, has begun to doubt the principles related to extrasensory atma. After having accepted that atma is the doer of karma, he now has a doubt as to how atma can be the sufferer of the karma's results. Gurudev is clarifying these doubts. Having brought the disparities in the jivas to notice, it is proved that these are the suffering of a jiva 's karmas. If Eshwar is not the doer of karma, he is neither capable of providing results of karma to the jiva. And if he begins to sit in judgement over the jiva's karmas, Eshwar loses his Eshwarhood. This is accepted by the disciple too. Yet there is a stray feeling in the mind that if Eshwar does not provide results then there will be no law in the Universe. Therefore, the jiva would not suffer the good or evil result of the karma at all. Gurudev provides the clarification to this doubt. phaLadAtA IzvarataNI, emAM nathI jarUra; karma svabhAve pariNa, thAya bhogathI dUra 85 O Disciple! You understand yourself that the Eshwar is incapable of providing results. So you may forget the matter that the jiva will suffer only if Eshwar provides fruit. The other matter is that we are seeing the jiva suffer the results of goodevil karmas. One is happy while another is woeful, this is the

Page #153
I am the Soul 503 result of jiva's karmas. If the jivas suffer the results of karmas, there is an organised system behind it. It is a law, the very own natural disposition of the Karma! All substances of the world are infinitely powerful. The atma is powerful beyond imagination. When its entire power blooms, it attains absolute moksu and becomes purified and enlightened. Similarly, there is infinite power in inanimate substance too. It also has its own independent result on account of this power. In fact, even when the inanimate substances transit into another form, their eternal infinite power is not lost. Pudgals of Karmana category transform into Dravya karma at the instance of the Bhava karma of the jiva in the form of attachment etc. At such times, the pudgals develop an additional power which enables them establish their dominance over the jiva. As long as the pudgals have not transited into the karma form, they are incapable of doing anything to the jiva. But the moment they establish contact with the jiva in the form of karma, they develop the abilities to provide results - in a certain form, certain quantum, for a certain period and with a certain intensity. Pudgals have their own transformation, as such when it is proper time they arise and provide results to the jiva and then resign. As the karmic atom enters the phase of arising and begins to provide result to the jiva, it begins to lose its strength and slowly erodes away. This natural transformation is a continuous process. Whether nectar or poison, once it enters the body, it has its effect in the predetermined dosage and then retires. Similarly, the positive karmas and the negative karmas provide their respective results and then go away. Once they have provided the results, they are akin to a snake without its fangs. They just cannot do any thing, for their contact with the jiva is broken. They are strong only as long as they are with the jiva. After that, a washout! Of course, they continue to transform themselves in their own way, but they are absolutely incapable of affecting the jiva.

Page #154
504 I am the Soul Thus, karma, in spite of being inanimate, provides results to the jiva. It is therefore, true that the jiva has to go into various stages to particular places and suffer the karmas, according to the karmas done. The disciple believes that only if the Eshwar exists, He would control the entire world and maintain order. But where it is impossible to prove the Eshwar, there imagining the management of Universe is impossible. Therefore, there cannot be a place for the jiva to suffer its good or evil karmas. The Gurudev answers this query - te te bhogya vizeSanAM, sthAnaka dravya svabhAva; Te ara e fora 311, hei faru hra .....CE The jiva has to suffer the good or evil karmas that it has done. It is according to these karmas that there are influences on the jiva and these influences are the Bhavagati of the jiva. There is also the Dravya Gati to suffer the results of the karmas in accordance with the Bhavagati. There are four Dravyagatis. Naraka, Tiryancha - animals, Manushya - human beings and Deva - demi Gods. Among them, the state where the best good karmas are suffered, is the Devagati - in heaven; the extremely evil karmas i.e the influences of papa, are suffered in Naraka - in hell; the mixed influences of good and evil karmas are suffered in the states of Manushya and Tiryancha. Let us dwell a little more on the aspect of Gatis. It is not that a jiva suffers a certain result because it goes into that state. But it is because a jiva has a certain karma which has taken it to that state and then it suffers the result of that karma. For instance, if a person is caught in the act of murder, he is arrested, jailed and then the court orders his hanging. So the hanging can be executed only when he is in the jail. Nobody can be executed in his own residence. Here it is not true that he is being hanged because he was in the jail. If it were true, then other people in the

Page #155
I am the Soul 505 jail such as the employees, superintendent and so on would also have to be punished. But only those who are criminals are punished in that state and place, not others. Thus, the jivu has to be in such states to suffer the karmas, as they determine. The jiva has to be in that place to suffer those karmas. It is not as if somebody has made those places. The consequence of the Universe is such. The Chaitanya drarya leads to good or evil influences, and as a result of the feelings of the chetan, there appears in the karmas the ability to offer good or evil results, and they provide the results to the jiva. Thus chaitanya - the animate and the jada - the inanimate have a cause and effect relationship. As such, the creation of such places in the Universe is automatic. The Gurudev says that the power of the jiva is infinite. The power of the inanimate is infinite. This power cannot be measured within the limits of our intellect. It is extremely difficult to unravel and state its deep secrets, but O Disciple! These deep matters have been mentioned here in brief. If a jiva attempts to manifest the infinite power that resides within, then it will rise above the feelings of this material world, and attain the natural disposition of the self. If one looks deep within the self, then one can identify the Self. For this purpose, chinmaya chintan - concentration of thought on the Self is an absolute necessity. Brothers! People worry - chinta - a lot, but they do not get to think - chintan. If the mind is slightly turned, then it can enter thought instead of worry. There was a very rich man in Europe, whose name was Arthur. All the riches, pleasures and means available in this world were at his disposal. He was rolling in enjoyment. The only goal in his life was Wealth. He had made a tremendous effort to achieve this end; his fortune had stood by him and he had attained the goal. Along with the wealth, there were also as many worries

Page #156
506 I am the Soul on his mind. He could neither eat during the day, nor sleep during the night. As if food and sleep had become his enemies. All his efforts to achieve them both had gone futile. There was but worry, worry and more worry. His wife was very sorry to see him in that state. She had tried many times in many ways to make Arthur see reason. But he was unable to give up his worries. His mind had no peace. Arthur had a friend who was a Doctor, and was capable of handling the depths of the human mind. Arthur's wife felt that, if some one could help him to attain peace, then it would be this Doctor. She sent Arthur with a great effort to see this friend. Arthur went to this Doctor at the insistence of his wife. The Doctor ushered him in with great love and seated him and chatted with him. When he asked Arthur why he had come, Arthur said, "Dear Friend! I am very disturbed. There are many worries on my mind. My bewilderment is increasing with every passing day. Sleep and rest seem to have no place in my life. I am now very much perplexed, I do not understand what I should do. You are a Doctor, I have come to get treated. Now you are the one who can relieve me of this burden of worry." Arthur seemed so helpless to the Doctor. It almost looked as if Arthur was seeing the Lord in the Doctor and was appealing to Him. The Doctor understood, that Arthur had no bodily illness but thirst for wealth, greed for enjoyment and the involvement with the material world had so engrossed him that he was unable to recognise the truth and as a result worries had begun to ride him. Assuring Arthur, he said, "I have the best medicine here, you will surely get well." He went in to his room, and coming out a little later, gave four little packets of medicine to Arthur. "This medicine has to be started from tomorrow morning. Every three hours one packet, and in just one day you will see the difference".

Page #157
I am the Soul 507 Arthur got up feeling greatly elated. But the Doctor stopped him. "But, Arthur! Let me tell you the procedure of taking the medicine. Tomorrow morning you should be at the sea-shore before sunrise. Far away, on a quiet, uninhabited beach, you should stay for twelve hours. Carry some things to eat and drink and some casual wear. Do not carry anything else!" .... Arthur returned the medicine. "I do not want your medicine. How can I afford to leave my business for twelve hours and lie on the beach? You know my appointments? And the many things that I have to do? What happens to all those? I do not want to go!" "Arthur dear, you wanted peace. If you want to rid your mind of all worries, why not try this once? Just go and see what happens." The loving words of the friend worked like magic and Arthur did some thinking. "Okay! If you so insist, I shall go. If I free myself for twelve hours, I can get a lot of work done there too. I shall just carry a couple of things - a phone and a radio. I can be in touch with the latest news and manage business over the phone. Okay! No problem! If you insist, I shall go!" "Heavens, No! You are not carrying anything. Not even a radio or phone and neither a pen or paper. Brother! It's just a matter of giving up for 12 hours. Just let go. Then see the joy you will experience!" Arthur was very sad. He was greatly disturbed in the mind. Worries were wasting him. He somehow agreed to the Doctor friend's advice. He went home, told his wife. She was happy and understood what was happening. She prepared for his trip. The next morning Arthur left with a back-pack of food and bedding. Along the sea-shore he went, found a quiet place and settled down. There was nobody around. For a while he was scared. "What do I do sitting here?" He was confused. He stood

Page #158
508 I am the Soul up and started pacing up and down and sat down again. It was time for the sunrise. As he watched, it appeared as if a ball of fire was rising from the sea. He had never seen such a marvellous scene. His mind was elated and got busy in watching the changing hues of the sky as the sun rose higher. It was quite some time before he realised suddenly that it was time for the medicine packet. He pulled out the packet of medicine, marked number one, from his pocket and opened it. It was empty. There was no medicine, no tablet, no powder - just nothing! What's this? He was wild. My friend has played a prank on me. What do I do with this plain paper? He was turning the paper in his hands. There was no medicine, but there seemed to be something written on it. He looked carefully and read - it said, "Listen carefully!" Arthur read that and wondered, 'What do I hear? What is the purpose of writing this? Is this any kind of medicine?' Arthur was intelligent. He realised that his friend was trying to convey something. When I have no radio, tape or any person here, what do I hear? What can I hear without these aids? As he was thinking, in the pleasant early morning atmosphere, he heard the sound of some kids playing at a distance. The kids were laughing. For the first time ever Arthur felt the sweetness of kids' laughter. He thought, 'Aha! How sweet is this little one's laughter!' Brothers! Arthur too had kids. Yet he could never enjoy an honest game with them. He had never been able to give them his love as a father. He had never been able to enjoy the love of his children. The spectre of earning money had so invaded his heart and senses that he had never been able to feel the joy that his kids could give him. Just then he heard the sweet chirping of the birds flying above him. He thought it was indeed very pleasant. The splashing waves of the sea were making rhythmic sounds that began to.

Page #159
I am the Soul 509 play to his ears. He could make out the lilting music in them. He had never known that there was so much to enjoy in this world. These sounds were pleasing his mind. He was engrossed in listening to them. But Arthur was a thinker. He thought, 'No, I am not supposed to listen to just these sounds. There has to be something else. What is it? What was the signal my friend was trying to show me?' As he thought, Arthur turned inwards. He concentrated on the sounds emanating from within. He tried to listen to them. There was somebody calling from within. Brothers! The jiva is not used to listening to voices from within. The jiva likes to listen to sounds outside. That is why it cannot live in isolation. The moment it is alone, the atma begins to say something. The conscience gets agitated. The din of the agitation is too much to hear. That is why the self is unwilling to listen to itself. The world may or may not know, but the self knows how it is within. Moreover, the soul too appears when in isolation. Man gets scared listening to it, begins fighting it. The sounds can be very unnerving. That is why man prefers to be in the midst of a noisy atmosphere, lest the atma begin talking from within, and even if it does, the voice should not fall on his deaf ears. Arthur's state was very much like this. He was agitated. The disturbance was heightening. Somebody was talking from within. There was no courage to listen to that voice, but Arthur's friend had insisted, so he had to listen. And the voice came from within, 'Arthur! Who are you? What have you done so far?" Arthur was surprised. 'Who is this asking me who I am? Who am I? Arthur! I am Arthur! Arthur who? This body? No, it is somebody else calling from within. Who is this speaking?' Arthur began to think. He had never been confronted with such a question from within. In fact, he never had had the time until today. He was unaware that there could ever be a voice arising from within. How could he then ever get a thought as 'I am the Soul'? Today.

Page #160
510 I am the Soul he was listening to the voice of his soul. He began to think. Who am I? The mind repeatedly uttered - who am I? There was no answer forthcoming, but the feeling arose that I am somebody different, somebody independent. What is this "I"? In spite of not knowing what the answer to this question could be, he began to feel good that the question itself had arisen. And he lost track of time in that thought. It was long since three hours had gone past. Now he was anxious to take the second dose. There was a feeling of peace within. He knew that this was not medicine, but a blessing. He opened the second packet and read. There was a beautiful statement in it - "Try reaching back!" Where shall I turn back from? He realised after a while that, his friend knew his past and wanted him to turn to the past. Sometimes the past is for forgetting while at others it is for remembering. In Arthur's case too, it was the same. His past was worth taking a lesson from. He began to think. He was a child of a poor widow. They were four brothers and sisters. Never having enough to eat or wear. Yet they were living the joys of a guileless life. In the entire year, the only time they ate well was on Christmas day when they had cake. That morning their mother would bake a cake. In the evening, that would be cut into four and only one would be available to each of them. But the joy of that moment would be there for the entire day. Arthur remembered that day. Aha! The joy that the little piece of cake contained! How tasty it used to be! Today I can get all sorts of cuisine. There is no taste, no interest, no hunger, no satisfaction. Why so? Why is there no joy even after attaining wealth? The happiness and joy that were present when I was poor are not to be seen today. It is proved that there is no happiness in wealth. Wealth is not the reason for happiness. Arthur was disillusioned. Until now he had wasted away in pursuit of wealth. He had forgotten everything, and without

Page #161
I am the Soul 511 fearing the Lord, had sinned terribly. All because of that thirst for earning wealth. Until now his wife and friends had been asking him to reduce his thirst for wealth, but he had never understood. He was unwilling to accept that wealth was the reason for his worry. But after quietly introspecting, and looking into the past, it dawned that all the efforts until now in pursuit of wealth were like mining for disaster. Ultimately, Arthur was convinced that wealth was not the be all and end all of things. Wealth is transitory. It wasn't there and has come now, so will it go away. Therefore, it is not worth being proud about. Arthur could begin to see the light and understood the truth. He felt much lighter. In this joy he overshot by an hour over three hours. He opened the third packet. His self was peaceful, his mind happy - free of all weight and feeling relieved. So he took the third dose of medicine, read the blessing - "Re-examine your motives!" My motives? What motives? I have never thought of motives. I live, just live. What do I live for? There has to be some reason. Arthur began to think. Now that the key was in his hand, there was no need to go out in search of motives. He looked within himself. He examined his conscience, scrutinised and evaluated and realised that his life's ultimate and supreme goal had been only wealth and the name, fame and status that it brought. All my struggle is to achieve these. Then is this motive ideal? Whose name has remained? Many wealthy men like me have been razed out. Who remembers them? Then who will remember me? Alas! I have been suffering all those severe pains for Arthur - the name that is bound to get razed out. Oh! All this is worthless! I have wasted my life so far. Brothers! That Arthur who yesterday wondered what would happen if he left his business for 12 hours and how things would run in his absence, was today proving all his activities wrong. He was seeing the totality of things in them and realising their

Page #162
512 I am the Soul futility. He felt that he had lived his life without a lofty motive and that all his effort until now had been meaningless. He went deep into thought and time passed. Now there was only one dose left. There was the urge to take that medicine - the packet which was seemingly filled with magic, which was capable of transforming life from its very roots. He felt so light and relieved that as he thought, he reclined on the sand where he sat and slept on his back. He opened and read the fourth packet. It said, "Write your worries on the sand!" Arthur read and began to think. Worry! Where is the limit to my worries? How many should I recall? How many should I write? But no, this medicine has been my saviour. So I should write them out. He began counting and writing down his worries on the sand with his finger - one, two, three ... as he lay there on the beach. His mind felt so light - it seemed as if what was like a mountain of worries had all just disappeared. He somehow wrote down 4 or 5, and was trying hard to recall others when something touched his foot. He sat up with a start. What was it that touched me? He saw it was sunset time and the tide was rising. The waves were splashing up and it was the water from a wave that had touched his foot. He began enjoying the sight of the rising sea. And then came a huge wave and took away all the worries that were written on the sand, as it went back into the sea. Arthur was left watching. It flashed to him - Alas! I have been bothered by those worries which were ultimately to be wiped out by the flow of time. What a fool I have been! Brothers! Man gets bogged down by false worries but out of the 100 worries that bother him, 96 never arrive. Of the remaining four, two are of the type that can get solved easily. There remain but two. In truth man has to confront but two worries, yet having been unnecessarily bogged down by a hundred worries and lost all energy in doing so, he has no strength left to face the ones that he has to.

Page #163
I am the Soul 513 Arthur was thinking. Aha! What a great lesson I am getting from this divine signal! Why have I nurtured all these worries? In the flow of time, both happiness and sorrow are bound to end. "Sorrow is a companion of but few days'. Having so thought, Arthur felt very relieved. He looked up his pack and had another bite of what was left and then sat in the midst of nature in a worry-less state. He began talking to himself. The self was experiencing a great joy. The moon had risen. There was a gentle breeze and Arthur's eyes were drooping with sleep. There was no cot, no bed, no pillow, no A/C and so he slept on the sand. He slept like he had not slept in many months before. It was sunrise time again when he woke up. The first rays of the sun touched his body and he opened his eyes. He looked around - wondering where he was. Yesterday morning, I had come here for twelve hours, now its past 24 hours. He stood up, feeling all joy within him and started on his way home. His wife was awaiting him at the gate, and received him merrily. Their little kid ran to him calling him 'Daddy, Daddy' and Arthur picked him up. He hugged the kid with all love. The kid was perplexed - is this my father, he wondered. What happened to this Daddy of mine who never used to pet me? Brothers! Arthur's life was changed. He was free from the mundane yearnings of this material world. His life's values had altered. He lived the rest of his life in peace and happiness. Arthur had until now only carried worries - chinta. He moved from chinta to chintan - thinking. Who am I? What do I do? What for am I doing this? - these were his thoughts. Only when he went deep within himself did he become happy for happiness lies within us. No external means can make us happy. Even we can be capable of doing whatever we decide if we awaken the infinite power that is lying dormant in our soul.

Page #164
514 I am the Soul The inquisitive disciple was washing the dirt of doubt from his mind with the words of the Gurudev, for awakening the strengths. As the doubts vanish, his atma becomes purified. Here the fourth doubt has also been clarified. Having been convinced that one who does the karma, is the same who suffers them, he expresses his faith - cothu pada te mAro AtmA ja bhoktA - T ... ... pote karIne pota ja bhogave (2) $ r am ... ATT.. Next will be the doubt about the fifth statement.

Page #165
But it has no salvation ... The pursuit of the three gems breaks the strangle-hold of karma. Only that jiva, which has to break away from the hold of karma, turns to the path of devoted pursuit. Climbing the steps gradually he reaches the topmost level. In Atmasiddhi Shastra such an inquisitive disciple is fired up with the thought of escape from the material world. That is why he remains at the feet of his Gurudev and continues to cleanse his own mind. The material world is subject to karma while liberation - moksa is independent. There is a doubt whether independent happiness can be attained or not. This is the doubt which is placed before the Gurudev - kartA bhoktA jIva ho, paNa teno nahi mokSa, aici calos sria qui, arte e ato.....6 Gurudev! Jiva is the doer of karma and also its sufferer. I am thoroughly convinced about this. By your grace I have clearly understood this principle but looking at all the jivas of the universe, and the wheel of life and death owing to the eternity of the jiva, it appears as if the jiva is doing karma and suffering them. While suffering he accumulates more karma. Thus the cycle of doing and suffering karma continues. Each jiva is suffering in the same cycle from infinite time. Even at present it appears as if the same relation exists between the jiva and karma. If the jiva were to ever attain moksa, it should have happened by now. How can that which has not happened in infinite time, happen now? The state of atma and karma that was during infinite time is still the same even today. The jiva keeps suffering those karmas as it does them. zubha kare phaLa bhogave, devAdi gati mAMya; BTT an Tighifa nhos, an fea TRIM .....6

Page #166
516 I am the Soul If the jiva does good karmas, it goes into the deva or manushya gati. There it enjoys the good results of the punya and experiences the material pleasures. If it does evil karmas, it goes into the naraka - tiryancha gatis and suffers them. As the evil result of papa it suffers sorrows. Thus the transition between gatis is always on, and it appears as if the jiva is never without karma. Here in saying that "good deeds lead to results such as life in deva and other such gatis', the disciple has broken a myth and proved that he has understood things in proper perspective. There is a very mistaken belief prevalent in the community that moksa can be attained by doing punya. The belief goes that just as punya leads to means that fetch worldly pleasures, a vast accumulation of punya also leads to moksa, which is some supreme state even above the devaloka and that there the jiva enjoys happiness. As a corollary to this belief, there is now also the myth prevailing that the deed of punya itself is Dharma. There is no Dharma other than that. So people do some charity etc., and are content that they have done Dharma. They take such Dharma as the way to moksa. Both these beliefs are sheer ignorance. First of all punya is not Dharma. Punya is an asrava. Where there is asrava, there is karmabandha. As long as there is karma, there cannot be moksa nor can there be moksa as a result of karma. Therefore, punya is not Dharma. Asrava is adharma. Sanvar is Dharma. So there can be moksa through sanvar and not through asrava. That which leads to the bondage of good karmas is punya asrava and that which dissolves the karma on the atma is Dharma. Moksa can be attained through Dharma. Thus to break these myths, the disciple has spoken in very clear terms that jiva goes to deva gati to live out the effects of punya or good karma and to hell - naraka for suffering papa.

Page #167
I am the Soul 517 This to and fro is continuous. There is more karma bondage again. Therefore, jiva is never without karma. Moksa is the state where there is a total removal of karma. It is agreed that jiva is the doer and sufferer of karma, but there is no possibility of its moksa. The disciple has raised this logical doubt about the aspect of moksa at the feet of the Guru. He is praying with all humility at the feet of the Guru and the benevolent Gurudev presents the suitable clarification to this doubt. That will soon follow....

Page #168
The natural disposition leads to moksa The pursuit of the three gems breaks through the bondage of infinite time. In spite of not knowing when the jiva was first bound, it is capable of breaking that bondage. The jiva lying from infinite time in nigoda, without any special effort, progresses on the strength of akama nirjara. Jiva has the ability to come out of that place. Moreover, the chetana of the jiva in nigoda is barely developed. As a result there is no scope for adding on sticky karmas there. That is why, the jiva keeps climbing while suffering the karmas which have ripened. There it is unaware as to when and who brought it the sorrows that it had to suffer through piercing and cutting. As a result strong feelings of attachment and aversion do not manifest in those jivas and the resultant karma of strong feelings does not bind. Even the nigoda jivas have all four kashayas and all four sanjnyas. But these affected dispositions are not capable enough to transform into strong results. It is not just that, how do the uni-sensory, bi-sensory, trisensory and quadra-sensory beings show their anger or strength? We take on anger or show of strength at the slightest pretext, but those beings cannot do anything even if somebody hurts them or kills them. Why! Even as a human, an oppressed person quietly and dumbly digests the verbal humiliation afflicted upon him by his superior. He cannot allow the kashayas (passions) to get ignited. So the chetana of the uni-sensory jivas lying in the nigoda is dormant; only a small part of their knowledge is active. As such the results of their affected disposition cannot manifest in their extreme. The more the awakening of the chetana, the higher the manifestation of the results of affected disposition. The passions can reach the extreme. The more the strong kashayas, the higher will be the bondage of karma. Nikachit karmas get

Page #169
I am the Soul 519 bound only when there is the attracting flow of extreme passions. As the jiva develops, its chetana develops more, it gets awakened. Simultaneously, the result of the affected disposition such as attachment etc., also become extreme. As a result, while the destination was moksa through the process of karma nirjara with the assistance of chetana, the jiva on the contrary got bound in much deeper karmas and invited life in the lower levels - durgati, The karma bondage of a jiva with minimum development is like a cotton thread, which can break with just a little effort. But a jiva which is endowed with five senses - panchendriyas - owing to its senses, mind, intellect and awakened chetana, gets so bound by karma as if bound by a coconut fibre rope (katha), from which it is very difficult to break out. Brothers! Think of the rope! The dry covering of coconut, from which all fibre is separated and again twisted together to form a long and strong rope, develops such strength that it can tie up anything or even draw up water from a deep well. But if its fibres get separated, it is useless. If the feelings of passion lying within are dispersed, every atom is separated, then they cannot inflict themselves upon the atma. Brothers! The ability to do this is in the jiva itself. The panchendriya jivas - jivas with five senses - are as adept at freeing themselves from karma as they are at getting bound in them. Just as the infinite energy of the atma gets activated at the time of adding karmas and attracts karman mass, the infinite energy of the developed chetana in the human body, when activated in the effort of the natural disposition, dissolves all karma. The activation of energy for total destruction of attachment and avarice is possible only as a human. The devas do not have this ability. The energy activated on the path of attachment leads right up to the seventh hell, while the energy activated on the path of detachment can lead right up to the destination of moksa. The Rajarshi Prasannachandraji had managed to activate these

Page #170
520 I am the Soul energies of both extremes in a very short span of time antarmuhurta. The chetana that was flowing towards an affected disposition had so activated the energy in the infinite spaces on the atma that it had begun the climb down the steps to hell. But when the same disposition was transformed back to the natural Self, it changed the course of the energy. The same energy detached itself from the affected disposition and began the destruction of karmas, so that even the ghati karmas were also destroyed in a short time. Adhyatmayogi Anandghanji Maharaj also speaks of the futility of the yoga shakti - the yogic energy - that gets released due to the activation of the infinite energy of the atma. utkRSTa vIrya niveze, yogakriyA navi pese re; yogataNI dhruvatAne le, Atamazakti na khese re.. vIra... When the supreme energy of the atma gets activated, the yogic shakti of mind, speech and body cannot enter it, that is to say, owing to the infinite energy being activated, the atma becomes purified and races ahead on the path of graduation in gunasthanas. As a result the activity of the yogas begins to taper off. The transactions of the yogas which result in the absorption of karmas, close down. The leshyas also get destroyed. Due to the supreme energy of the atma, the atma becomes free of yoga, activity and leshyas (ayogi, akriya and aleshi). And as the yogas stabilise, the atma also stabilises. In other words, the sayogi atma becomes ayogi. All pudgals are left behind. Both the substances - atma and pudgal become independent. And atma attains moksa. The disciple is concentrating only on activity. That is why he is telling the Gurudev that the jiva involved with good and evil feelings is constantly earning punya and papa karma. And as a result it keeps wandering through heaven and hell. If its beginning is not traceable, then its end is not visible either. Liberation can be attained when the wandering through the gatis

Page #171
I am the Soul 521 ends. Therefore, it does not seem as if moksa can be attained. Gurudev offers solace -- jema zubhAzubha karmapada, jANyAM saphaLa pramANa; are frafer i hoda, TE ATT HIU .....68 Son! You have already understood the principle that the good result of good thought and evil result of evil thought are available with the jiva itself. The tremendous effort of a jiva involved with good or evil feelings does not go waste. This principle has been established with sufficient proof. Let us now consider this principle in greater detail. An atma involved with good or evil feelings obtains results in the form of a noble gati or a lowly gati, happiness or sorrow. Similarly, when the jiva withdraws from both good and evil feelings, there appears in it a pure, self-transitory feeling. This pure thought is capable of destroying the karmas bound by the good/evil feelings. This pure thought is diametrically opposite of the impure good or evil feelings. It is a detachment from affected disposition and an involvement with the natural disposition. Brothers! This is a very interesting topic. Pure feeling is the feeling of the atma. If it is a detachment from affected disposition, it is also an involvement with the natural disposition. Being involved with the pure thought is the only natural activity of the atma. As the pure, natural state of the atma goes on waxing, so the effect of the affected state goes on waning. Atma begins to get free from the karmas. The degree in which there is freedom from karma, is the degree in which the jiva attains moksa. Never can a jiva attain moksa straightaway, in one span of time. True, it may sound, when you say by the way that the jiva needs but one moment to get freed from the bondage. But the truth remains that, the jiva which has remained a mithyatvi for infinite time cannot attain moksa the moment it attains samyak darshan. The jiva always progresses gradually;

Page #172
522 I am the Soul perhaps a jiva with less or lighter karma may race ahead while another may take the time required for the transformation of half the pudgals. But it does go on getting free gradually from the karmas and attains moksa at the end. Thus, the Gurudev says, a jiva can attain moksa as it gets detached from the good or evil feelings. O Disciple! You should understand that if activity is fruitful, so is detachment. The disciple had asked that the jiva is straggling with karma from infinite time, and yet it is just as it was. The depravity of the jiva has not yet left it. In response to this, the Gurudev says - tyo kALa anaMta te, karma zubhAzubha bhAva; teha zubhAzubha chedatAM, upaje mokSa svabhAva Infinite time was lost because the jiva has remained engrossed in good-evil thoughts. It never attempted to overcome them. By and large, the jivas remain in such good-evil thoughts; they are not aware that it is possible to detach oneself from them. 90 Man mistakes retirement for uselessness. Retirement is taken for inactivity, for sitting with hands crossed, for lying around lazily. If there is activity, it is bound to have some effect. What effect can inactivity have? Nothing whatsoever! But what is this retirement. When a jiva is involved with some activity and it moves away from it and abandons that activity, the jiva is said to be retiring from it. Only when it retires from one activity can it get involved with another. The time of retirement can be put to good use. Well, it is the same with the feelings in the atma. Good and evil are both passionate feelings, impure feelings. They have to be abandoned, to be destroyed; they have to be retired from. As a result, atma stabilises in its natural disposition of the self and pure thought appears. In fact, material world does not fit into the natural disposition of the jiva. It is developed when the jiva.

Page #173
I am the Soul 523 transforms into the affected disposition. But when the jiva begins to move away from the material world, the natural disposition in the form of the self yearning for moksa, that has remained suppressed, becomes activated. The jiva keeps on getting into the feelings of attachment and aversion in all the species that it visits - whether it becomes a human, a deva, a resident of hell or an animal. It has never retired from the thoughts of attachment etc. Two cows are tied in a shed and you go to feed them green fodder - you give it to one cow first and it takes you a little longer to give it to the other. That other one gets anxious and restless. It begins to get angry with you. But when you give it the fodder it begins to express its love for you. These jivas and others in other species do have feelings of attachment and aversion. But as humans these feelings get heightened. Brothers! Do you know that the life form of humans is the only one where the three - good, evil or pure - feelings of a jiva can reach the climax? When a jiva begins to bind punya karmas while progressing in good feelings it goes on to be born as the Mahardwika Deva in the great Sarvarthasiddha Mahavimaana. Ifit continues to fill its bag with papa karma through evil feelings, it goes away to the seventh hell to suffer the extreme pain. And if the same jiva, breaks away from both good and evil feelings and begins to transform into pure thoughts, it eliminates all karma and attains moksa. Only a human is capable of attaining all these three climaxes. That is why Srimadji says that good or evil is not your own natural disposition. Quite apart from these two, the natural disposition to attain moksa is your very own. Awaken this feeling! Brothers! Pure thought appears and progresses only with the development of the all-knowing, all-seeing natural disposition.

Page #174
524 I am the Soul Only seeing and knowing is your true form of the self. Nothing beyond this. So the effort you have to put in is to get away from the feelings of attachment and aversion and stabilise in the knowing-seeing thoughts. For this purpose, you need a tremendous effort. The effort has to be as strong as the feelings of attachment and aversion which make the jiva to forget its natural disposition of the self. The natural disposition of water is coolness. But if water is not taken down from the stove, and it remains boiling, then how can it cool down? When water is required in its fundamental natural form, either you bring it down from the stove or switch the stove off. Then nothing needs to be done! However hot the water may be, once it has broken away from the company of fire, it begins to cool down by itself. It may well take a long time, but water rests only after reaching its true original form. Brothers! The natural moksa form of the atma in its allknowing, all-seeing state has got distorted due to the fire of attachment and aversion, as if it is boiling. Try just once to tell yourself that 'I shall neither indulge in attachment nor in aversion. So long as I have the senses, there are bound to be passions, but I shall remain a mere witness.' Then watch whether the true natural disposition of the jiva appears or not. Just as water needs at least 4 to 6 hours to completely cool down after it is taken off the stove, the jiva too needs time to attain moksa after it begins to practice the all-knowing, all-seeing state; moksa is not instantaneous. But once the attachment etc., have been subdued, or in other words when Samyak Darshan has been attained, it does not take longer than half pudgal transformation. The jiva's moksa is a certainty. Thus, the disciple's doubt had been that since the jiva was stuck in a cycle of doing and then suffering good or evil karmas and then again doing them, it can never attain moksa. In reply the Gurudev has told that a jiva which detaches itself from the.

Page #175
I am the Soul 525 good or evil thought and manifests the natural disposition of moksa, can attain moksa. The good or evil thoughts are not the original natural disposition of a jiva, but moksa is its true form. The Gurudev presents one more thought on this topic, which is mentioned later.

Page #176
... total detachment! The pursuit of the three gems transforms into totality, only then does the atma attain total moksa. The fruit of devoted pursuit is liberation, but the liberation is directly proportional to the degree of pursuit. No jiva can ever attain moksa instantaneously, but it happens gradually. It is like the Sun rising gradually at the horizon in the eastern sky before it comes out fully. If sun-rise is now at 6 O'clock, then the sky begins to change colours about an hour before that. Then there is dawn, day-break and then the Sun appears to rise slowly. At first there is just a thin red arch visible, which begins to thicken with every passing moment and in a short while the ball of fire rises. This process is gradual. Similarly, any atma, which has presently attained Samyaktva after remaining in falsehood for infinite time, does not attain moksa instantaneously. The jiva which is stuck in the mire of affected disposition, progresses step by step. It has never happened that a jiva even after attaining samyaktva has moved straightaway from the fourth gunasthana to the pure state of thirteenth gunasthana. The progress is slow as and how the jiva eliminates mohaniya karma. There is infinite power lying in the jiva. But owing to the thick covering of the Karmas it cannot be experienced. This jiva has been covering the atma more and more with karmas. But once it changes over from the dark (waning) phase to the bright (waxing) phase, its rise is certain. It is worth dwelling upon this usage. What is the dark phase? That phase in which darkness grows with every passing day. After the full-moon day, the dark phase begins. On the first day after full-moon, the moon does not look very different from the full-moon. But when observed carefully, a reduction in its.

Page #177
527 I am the Soul brightness can be noticed; the moon looks hazier compared to the previous day. It even rises late. As the days pass, the moon becomes paler and the darkness increases. On the new-moon day, there is total darkness. In the bright phase, on the second day after new-moon, the moon is like a fine thread. It has no radiance. But as it grows, its brilliance also does. Even the moon on the eighth or tenth day of the bright phase radiates light. The brightness of the moon goes on increasing and on the full-moon night the moon is seen bright in its full splendour. A person with good eyes can even read in its light, work in it. Similarly, when the jiva is in the dark-phase, the darkness of mithyatva - false belief - in the atma goes on increasing. Why! Sometimes there can be an increase or decrease, but it can never come into light. When the darshan-mohaniya karma wears thin, a little darkness is broken through, and when like the moon of the second day of the bright phase, the jiva steps on to the path of spiritual progress, it slowly turns brighter. But the jiva takes long to turn from the dark-phase to the bright-phase. For instance, if today were to be the first day after full moon, and if we desire that the full-moon of the previous day should rise, it is impossible! No power can alter the set course. If today is the first day after full moon, then we have to wait for a whole month to see the full-moon again. Do what you may, it is impossible to make the full-moon rise whenever you desire. Even today's science, however advanced it may be and in spite of claiming to have landed on the moon, cannot do it. It happens only in its due course. Dark phase, it may well be. Yet it is in progress. So a month later there is bound to be a sighting of the full-moon. In the same way, after the jiva enters the bright phase, its darshan-moha diminishes, and once it manages to step out of

Page #178
528 I am the Soul the deep darkness, it cannot suddenly generate the energy that can destroy all karmas. It has to await the right time. But it is certain that an atma in the bright phase will attain the ultimate. The disciple has a doubt about the existence of moksa. Gurudev is trying to remove that doubt. Jiva is by itself in the natural disposition of moksa. If this natural disposition is awakened, then jiva can rapidly progress in the direction of the tremendous effort. This effort, the purushartha, destroys ignorance, breaks the alien influences and attains moksa as it progresses. Gurudev while trying to tell us this, says - dehAdika saMyogano, AtyaMtika viyoga; fhell HTA PATA , Fast Bia HGHT .....98 O Child! When there is a total detachment -- atyantika viyoga - from the body and other sanyogas, moksa happens at that very moment. Body, senses, mind, intellect etc., are all with the jiva due to the sanyoga. There has to be a viyoga - detachment, wherever there is a sanyoga - involvement. This jiva in the past has obtained body and senses etc., several times and was detached from them as many times. Wherever it was born, it got a body, and along with it upto five senses. Sometimes it found a mind, an intellect and with the assigned age for that life getting over, it had to abandon all that there and take another birth. Thus there was a sanyoga and a viyoga of body etc., for an infinite number of times. Yet the jiva could not go beyond. The reason being that although the jiva went through viyoga from the body etc, the karmas remained with it, which were repeatedly instrumental in arranging the sanyoga with body etc. Just as the viyoga from body etc., was for a short while, the karmas attached to the atma did not dissolve completely and the sanyoga and viyoga with them continued. Sometimes, there were more karmas, sometimes less, but they did not break the barrier

Page #179
I am the Soul 529 of the infinite. As such the jiva had to repeatedly wander in sanyoga and viyoga. Here the learned Gurudev says that the jiva does not come on the true path due to such momentary flashes of viyoga. But when there is extreme viyoga, the jiva manages such a tremendous effort that there is never any sanyoga again. Once all the sanyogas with karmas are abandoned, there remains no necessity to get into any body. In the absence of a body, the sanyogas of senses, mind and intellect etc., do not happen. The atma attains the pure, true natural form. That form is called Siddhapada, Moksapada or the eternal natural form, where the jiva has only to enjoy the bliss of its original disposition for infinite time. In this gatha, siddhapada has been described as eternal because the Jain tradition believes siddhi as infinite. Once a jiva is liberated, it does not have to take birth again, or enter this world in either human or any other form. If this were not the case, then moksa would have no meaning. The whole tremendous effort is to avoid the repeated births. And if even after liberation there remains a need to be born again, then bless this Moksa! Here the jiva which becomes a siddha, attains moksa, is for eternal time; to remain in the eternal state for ever. Bereft of all sanyoga and viyoga, only the unwavering, unmoving eternal state is moksa. That is why, Mahayogi Anandaghanji Maharaj has sung in the soulful bliss - rIjhyo sAheba saMga na parihare re, HTI Hifa aria ...# .... Attaining the state of the supreme soul, which has neither a beginning nor an end, is itself the enjoyment of the soul. Let us understand this infinite. The various relations with the jiva can be known as four - 1. Anadi Ananta, 2. Anadi anta, 3. Adi ananta, and 4. Adi anta.

Page #180
530 I am the Soul The jiva is anadi-ananta. It was never created and will never get destroyed. Therefore, the jiva has neither a beginning nor an end. Karma's relation with the jiva is anadi-anta. The time when this jiva was first bound by karma is not traceable. Karma has been with the jiva for infinite time like gold lying in a mine. In spite of having no beginning, this relation does have an end. If the jiva does the tremendous effort, then like the gold which gets purified after being removed from the dirt, the jiva too gets purified. That is to say, the relation with karma ends. Therefore, although the relation with karma has no beginning, it does have an end. The moksa state of the atma has a beginning and it is endless. The jiva was in a state of bondage from infinite time while wandering in the world. Earlier it had never been liberated. But when karma is totally dissolved, the state of moksa is attained. This state remains with the jiva for infinite time. It never comes to an end. Hence in the state of moksa, the jiva has a beginning and no end. The state of beginning and end - adi and anta -- occurs to a jiva in various ways. Although the relation of jiva and karma is without a beginning, when considering every karma individually - when it attaches to the jiva, it has a beginning and when it detaches from a jiva, it has an end. In another way, when the jiva, which has been eternally in mithyatva, attains Samyaktva for the first time, its samakit state begins. This samakit is nonerosive, but when either upashama or kshayopashama occurs, the samakit goes away and it has an end. Thus the jiva has several aspects which have a beginning and an end. Anandghanji Maharaj speaks of attaining such an infinite - eternal feeling of the Supreme Soul which does have a beginning but is endless. The substance of Supreme Soul, which is lying

Page #181
I am the Soul 531 within, has to be made manifest, has to be appeased - that is, the self itself has to appease the Lord Atma. Neither the Lord Atma nor the idol in the temple can be appeased by merely offering money, rice-grain or fruits and flowers. To appease the soul within, it is necessary to become engrossed with it. It is necessary to observe only the Lord Atma in the body and mind, by going beyond all the external sanyogas. Kabir's love as a consort thus appeases the Lord. Kabir has experienced the pangs of separation from the Lord. He has also tried to appease Him, believing Him to be his lover. When Kabir manages to go deeper into self-realisation, he feels the presence of the Lord within himself. But the Lord does not manifest before him. Kabir is in a dilemma as to how to attain that Lord. He says prItamako patiyAM likhU, jo karha hota videsa; TH, #, # # atahit ano ah ....? Had my lover been abroad, I would write him a letter and get news from him, call him over. But how do I send a message to someone who is settled in my body, mind and eyes? What message do I send him? Kabir is trying to say, My Supreme Lord, the Satchidananda Brahma is residing within me. There is no need to look for Him anywhere. Once He is appeased, He will never be able go away from me. Taking the simile of conjugal life, Kabir says: In the chamber of my eyes, I shall set the bed of my pupils for my lover to be appeased behind the veil of my eyelids. nayananakI karI koTharI, putarI palaMga bichAya; Yachtchi falch strict, fury ant its fisir .... With external eyes closed and inner eyes open, if one gets engrossed in the soul spirit, the lover Lord will certainly appear. Then immersed in the rapture of eternal joy one can celebrate with the Supreme.

Page #182
532 I am the Soul Well this is the Supreme adi-ananta principle, which Srimadji too has mentioned in the gatha. When there is a total viyoga of all external sanyogas, the eternal and infinite Siddhapada can be attained. All jivas are capable of attaining through their tremendous effort that eternal joy which has no end. Gurudev has provided the clarification to the doubt whether there is moksa at all, that had arisen in the disciple's mind - when the all knowing, all seeing state of the original disposition of moksa in thought manifests, the jiva can certainly attain moksa. When the disciple was convinced that there is 'moksa', his mind began to sing with joy --- pAMcamuM pada te sauthI sohAmaNuM mokSanI prApti pamAya .. (3) para saMyoge saMsAre AthaDyo svabhAve svamAM samAya.... mArI... After sufficient clarification, there is now but one curiosity remaining in the disciple's mind. His ability to think and his contemplative nature have inspired such curiosity in him. The questions arising out of this curiosity will soon appear...

Page #183
There certainly is Moksapada ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems is obviously for the attainment of the pursued goal. Jiva is the pursuer, the three gems - jnana etc. are the devotion and attainment of the state of Supreme Soul is the goal. In other words, they are the sadhaka, sadhana and the sadhya. Not only in the spiritual view, but even in the practical life, the presence of all these three is necessary. The higher the human intellect, the more desires there will be. A desire to achieve something, to attain something. That is the goal - sadhya. The effort being put in to attain this goal is the pursuit - sadhana. And the person putting in that effort is the pursuer - sadhaka. Humans have many sorts of desires. Not all these desires are fulfilled. If there is a chance, strength, destiny, effort - only then the desires are fulfilled not otherwise. Yet humans as well as all other beings have desires. Indeed these desires arise because there is a possibility of attaining something. No jiva desires for something that does not exist, that cannot be attained at all. Desires may be good or bad. The efforts to fulfil desires may be through sinful acts or also through virtuous activity. Whatever it may be, the point to be understood here is that in the achievements in practical life too there can be success only when there are the proper three - sadhaka, sadhana and sadhya. You can notice this in insects too. There is a small grain of food lying here. Far away there is an ant-hole. An ant gets attracted by the smell of the food and comes here. First of all there was the awakening of a desire in the ant. Then it made the effort to reach here. And it took away the grain of food. Thus the ant was the sadhaka, its effort was the sadhana, the grain of food was the sadhya and the attainment was siddhi.

Page #184
534 I am the Soul Who taught this ant? How did such a small insect know that it should go and get the grain? Brothers! That is the jiva's inherent strength. It has a dormant ahara sanjnya - the activity of enjoyment inspires it and it does the work. It has been the practice of the jiva from infinite time. It does not need to be taught. But the jiva has forgotten its original true disposition. If the self awakens then it can attain. It has forgotten the knowledge that whatever is to be achieved is by the self within the self. If we consider the fact, it is the jiva which is the sadhaka. The effort that is happening due to the original disposition of the jiva is the sadhana. The awakening of the Moksa disposition of the atma is the sadhya and its attainment is the siddhi - Moksa. Gurudev has told us this in explanation of the fifth statement. Now we have to finalise the last and the most important statement. What needs consideration here is the question as to why, if Moksa were the greatest solution, was it placed as the last statement? Atma exists, it is eternal, it is the doer, it is the sufferer and Moksa exists - only a jiva in whose mind there is a properly established faith in these five statements can take to the path of self realisation. Why would a jiva, who has been first told about the path of self-realisation, get into the devoted pursuit at all, when it does not believe in the existence of the atma or has no faith in the existence of moksa? This is precisely why Srimadji has first ensured that the people desirous of moksa have a rock-like unwavering belief in it first and has then told showed them the solution of moksa. This is true of material world too. When we know that there is gold, silver or diamond lying in a mine, we search for means to obtain them. We accept any risk and get involved in the activity of attaining them. Regardless of the fear of death, man attempts to obtain the wealth lying at the bottom of the sea. Why! You discovered petroleum! How? Were there rivers of petroleum flowing? No, it is found only after deep drilling. Once we know

Page #185
I am the Soul 535 that a certain thing is available at a certain place, we rest only after obtaining it. Indeed, to obtain that thing we may even have to learn the proper technique. The stuff lying within the folds of Earth is not obtainable by merely digging a hole 25 to 30 feet deep. Even from the depths it will be available only to those who are knowledgeable about it. Without complete knowledge, precious things cannot be obtained. The disciple has been satisfied about the first five statements. And the learned Gurudev is a proper master of the path to moksa. To learn about this king's-way from the Gurudev, the disciple has got into this deliberation. But the deeper he got into it, the more confusing it became. None else but the Gurudev seems capable of removing this confusion. Hence, placing the agitation of his mind before the Gurudev, the disciple says - hoya kadApi mokSapada, nahi avirodha upAya; Auf mitas Sriwi, TIETEET JRT? .....88 O Gurudev! You have proved that moksapada exists and after deliberation, I too am convinced of it. Now there has to be a solution for attaining this moksa. But it seems there is no foolproof solution. The solution for reaching such a great accomplishment must also be equally great and no one should be in a position to contradict it. It should be so unanimously acceptable that no argument from anybody should be able to disturb this path. Why has this doubt arisen in the disciple's mind now? Why is he not able to identify a fool-proof path? He himself tells us in the next gatha - athavA mata darzana ghaNAM, kahe upAya aneka; Hi ha helat, a 7 te fada .....83 There are many religions and many faiths here. All of them believe in a salvation of their own. Each one of them has a different method for attaining moksa. Some say that the path of knowledge is the true path. Learn well, acquire great knowledge,

Page #186
536 I am the Soul study the scriptures regularly and deliberate upon them. Try to obtain as much knowledge as possible and there will be moksa. Some recommend the path of penance. Karmas are dissolved through penance. Therefore, perform as rigorous a penance as possible. Emaciate your body. The more you torture your body, the earlier there will be moksa. So leave everything else and just do penance. There are some who have held that devotion is the only path to moksa. The paths of knowledge and penance are difficult. The path of devotion --- bhakti - is very simple. Simply sing the praises of the Lord and you will get moksa. There are others who profess that the path to salvation is in violent means. They believe religion to be in their rituals and go around saying that theirs is the only path to salvation. Thus everybody claims that theirs is the true path to moksa. Mahayogi Anandghanji Maharaj says - abhinandana jina darisaNa tarasIe darisaNa durlabha deva; mata-matabhede re jo jaI pUchIe HE H 364 .... 314 ... Eulogising the fourth Tirthankar Prabhu Abhinandan, he says, "O Prabhu! I am thirsting for your darshana, but it is scarce. Moreover, there are so many faiths - paths and communities. When I go and ask them, they all say, 'Ours is the true path! You will be able to see the Supreme - parmatmadarshana - only by following our principle. None else is capable of getting you the darshana of the Prabhu.' Here parmatmadarshana is the attainment of the own soul. In other words, we may say Samyak Darshana. Everybody professes a different path for attaining Samyak Darshana. Each one of them claims that their principle, their path, their community alone can lead you to Samyak Darshana.

Page #187
I am the Soul 537 The disciple has studied all religions. He has heard many arguments. As a result he is in a confusion as to which one of all these is the true path. If one of them were to be taken for the true path and upon traversing it, if it were to lead a wrong destination, it would be difficult to return from there. Now which path should be accepted? How does one discern between the true and false path? And if this discerning is not possible, then which path to pursue for devotion? Moreover, there is the other question that the karmas have remained attached to the atma from infinite time. In the infinite past this jiva has been doing karmas. And how limited the span of this life is! How can the infinite karmas collected over infinite time be destroyed in such a small lifetime? The disciple has a lingering doubt in his mind that the jiva may certainly have to spend as much time in destroying the karmas as it took in binding them. Tremendous the human effort may be, but where does he have the strength to break through the infinite karmas? Thus there is a great upheaval in the disciple's mind over the topic of means to moksa. The various methods of the various religions are confusing him. He is astounded by the infiniteness of the past. As a result he is unable to identify any stable method of attaining moksa. In addition, the other beliefs of this world are also confusing him. What these other beliefs are, we will learn shortly.

Page #188
... rise in my fortune! The aim of the devoted pursuit of the three gems is moksa. If moksa exists and there is no way of attaining it, then how can there be moksa - liberation? This is the doubt now in the mind of the disciple. For this reason, all the questions that have arisen in his mind, he has been placing before the Gurudev. There weren't so many questions regarding the other statements, as in this case, because there is a strong desire in the disciple to attain moksa. He is filled to the brim with that desire. The faith with him is calling out, "I am the Soul', "I am myself the Supreme Soul'. I can attain the state of the Supreme Soul. Then why should I not manifest this divine strength? When there is an eternal treasure of infinite bliss lying within me, why not I attain it? For material prosperity too, we see this happening. Brothers! When you realise that here I have this right, this title, don't you strive to obtain it? Do you leave any stone unturned? Why! If it means putting up a fight for acquiring title, or going a step ahead into the Courts, aren't you prepared? And not just that, if in the process you are likely to earn disrepute, you would rather do it, but not let the title go. Why so? The attraction towards this title and the visualisation of the happiness that can be derived from it, is so strong that you will not remain without putting up an effort. Brothers! Do you know for how long such prosperity or titles of the material world will last? Just a short while. And there is no assurance that you will derive the expected happiness and peace from it after having acquired it. It might even turn out to be a source of sorrow. While here we are talking of acquiring the spiritual title. The disciple has developed within him a strong faith in the substance of the Supreme Soul. He wants to know the methods of manifesting it. But there are ever so many religions challenging that theirs is the true path. They are fighting out

Page #189
I am the Soul 539 with others claiming them to be untrue. Then which one of them is the true path? Which one should be followed? The disciple is unable to understand this. But the disciple is studious. He knows about the beliefs of various sects - religions. For a person in devoted pursuit - aradhana - it is necessary to also know about the misleading paths just as he knows about the true path. For the beliefs of the other paths should not become hurdles in his path. His own path should be undisturbed. That is why the disciple is placing his other doubts about this subject before the Gurudev - kaI jAtimAM mokSa che, kayA veSamAM mokSa, THT FASTT TA, AUT GT GTV.....88 O Gurudev! Pray tell me in which caste I should be born, so as to attain moksa. In our country, there has been the caste arrangement from olden ages. Kshatriyas, Brahmans, Vaishyas and Shudras - the human society had been divided into these four castes. In the period in which it was done, it had some practical and religious value. It was an outcome of the demands of the times. But with the changing times the values get slowly worn out. With newer generations new values get established and older values get forgotten. The result can be either beneficial or harmful. Sometimes such arrangements get perverted to such an extent that their basic principles are totally forgotten. The arrangement of castes had been done according to vocations. The Kshatriyas were required to look after the matters of State. Providing protection to the subjects and enabling their progress were the two responsibilities assigned to them. The Brahmans handled religion and rituals. It was their lookout to ensure that the commoner did not stray on to the wrong path, and remained bound in principles and good conduct, and led an honest life. Vaishyas had in their control the entire system of

Page #190
540 I am the Soul finance. Making the State progress financially, making it prosper and enhancing the country's respect in other countries was the lookout of Vaishyas. The Shudras had to provide all the necessities of societal life. Thus this arrangement had been made to ensure that the entire humanity could live fearlessly and honestly. So long as these values were maintained, everybody lived happily in harmony and in unity. But if the greatness achieved cannot be digested, then it leads to indigestion. The Kshatriyas, Brahmans and Vaishyas, in their conceit lost their balance and began to scorn the Shudras. They were given no rights at all - neither any status in the society nor the right to follow a religion. Ifa Shudra mistakenly entered the area of a temple or even if passed by from behind it and in doing so if unknowingly some chanting from the Vedas were to be heard by him, it would be treated as such a great crime that it would be punishable with nothing less than death. Not just that, even a great Bhakta-kavi like Tulasidas tells us on one hand about Ramachandra embracing members of a lowly tribal caste, while on the other he says that Shudras deserve to be beaten; they should be thrashed. Think Brothers! The limits to which the humanity in humans can decay and die. Not just that, there came a time when the Kshatriyas began to think that religion was the bastion of only the courageous. We are the brave ones, so we alone have the right to observe the religion, none else. Certain scriptures could be read by Brahmans alone. Others do not even have the right to touch those scriptures. Thus in societal and religious areas, such customs began to gather momentum. So the disciple wonders as to a birth in which caste would lead to moksa. The other question is moksa in what apparel? Broadly, the Jains believe that moksa will be attainable only if one dresses like a Jain. Not just that, the Digambers say that only as Digambers i.e. in nakedness, can moksa be attained. If there are

Page #191
I am the Soul 541 clothes on the body then moksa is not attainable. And therefore, the so called great learned speakers praise the Digambar Jain religion. What a great ignorance! What perversion! Several of the sadhus who had taken disciplehood at the feet of Bhagawan Mahaveera were sachelak - wearing clothes, and several others were achelak - sans clothes i.e. accepting nudity. Yet both types of Sadhus managed to attain moksa through their sadhana. None of them had a label of Shwetamber or Digamber pasted on them, but that did not come in the way of their attaining moksa. Not just that, there is a strong feeling prevalent that women do not attain moksa, only the men do. They do not accept that Mata Marudevi, Chandanbala, Mrigavati and others did attain moksa. The female body cannot put in the tremendous effort required for attaining moksa. Why! In this age too, we have heard of several courageous women. Women like the brave Jhansi Rani Laxmibai have put up a brave fight in the wars. How strong must they have been! Yet such beliefs are prevalent. The disciple knows about such beliefs and he says that it is difficult to decide in what caste and in what appearance moksa can be attained; and in the absence of that clarification everything else is futile - tethI ema jaNAya che, maLe nA mokSa upAya; silaif Hue muit, pit 340 gr gry? .....84 Gurudev! Thinking over this, one wonders how a perfect method of moksa can be found when such variety exists in them? And if there is no way of attaining moksa, then what is the meaning of the five statements that you explained saying atma exists? Why do we learn about them? How do they benefit us? Surely, this learning is not merely to inflate our ego that "I know'. It is worthwhile acquiring this knowledge only if it enables the attainment of moksa. O Gurudev! I have taxed you so much. I

Page #192
542 I am the Soul have been bothering you from such a long time telling you all my doubts. And if there is no benefit from knowing all this, then I have troubled you unnecessarily. The disciple is filled with devotion towards the Guru. That is why he is not willing to trouble the Gurudev, but at the same time he has an unwavering faith that now that I have taken refuge with the Gurudev, I shall not return without success. Whatever cobwebs of doubts there may be within me, he will certainly remove them and make my inner-self crystal clear. That is why fearlessly he is presenting one doubt after the other to the Gurudev. He is like the child who has just learnt walking and is now stepping about without the fear of falling or getting hurt. The child knows that my protector, my mother is with me. She will not let me fall or get hurt. So it roams about fearlessly. The disciple has dedicated his unflinching faith in the Gurudev, and without fearing whether his doubts are logical or illogical, he is placing them before the Gurudev. And so he finally says - pAMce uttarathI thayuM, samAdhAna sarvAMga; samaju mokSa upAya to, udaya udaya sadbhAgya .....96 O Gurudev! Your unlimited benevolence is upon me. You have let flow unlimited affection towards me. Your compassion is being showered upon me incessantly. My five doubts have been cleared totally. There is not even an iota of doubt left in me about those. I am greatly relieved. Now I place the sixth doubt before you. If I can get a proper clarification for it, then I shall consider myself very fortunate. Brothers! Srimadji has very thoughtfully used some very beautiful words in this gatha. - 34 34 - the disciple says - I shall attain the power or wealth of the entire Universe. I do not consider attaining power or rule as my fortune. For this was attained by the jiva several times and also lost. There is no novelty to it. But if I were to find the way to moksa, if no doubts about it

Page #193
I am the Soul 543 were to remain in my mind, if moksa were to firmly reside in my faith, if it were to be woven into my breathing, if my intellect were to accept it, if it were to pervade my behaviour, if it were to totally root out my habits, if it were to channelise my progress on the right path, if all this were to happen then I would consider it the rise of my punya. I shall believe it to be the rise - the shining of my great fortune. Here the disciple, with total dedication, is appealing at the Gurudev's feet placing his total faith. O Gurudev! All the questions so far have been properly clarified. There is no doubt about them anywhere within me. Now there is one last doubt left. Please clarify this for me. Brothers! When the disciple is presenting his doubt to the Guru with such dedication and curiosity, the Gurudev too is greatly pleased. This is a fortuitous happening. When an able disciple appears before the sages, their self rejoices, their minds open up. I recollect, an old Shravak by name Lalchandji, from our stay at Jabalpur (Madhya Pradesh) in 1971. He was the follower of the Temple-going sect but had a great curiosity for knowing the Principle. Every occasion that he came to our Upashraya, he would very humbly place one question or the other before the revered elder Mahasatiji. His competence was such that the replies that Pujya Bapji gave to those questions were truly wonderful. We were surprised to hear them. We asked Pujya Bapji, once after he left, "Bapji! We had also asked the same question earlier, but you had not explained in such a way then." Pujya Bapji said, "There is something great about this Shravak, his level is so high that such words come out of me readily." And then it became a routine with us, that whenever Lalchandji came, we all would gather at the feet of Pujya Bapji. We would then learn the great secrets of the scriptures.

Page #194
544 I am the Soul Brothers! Here too, the competent disciple is sitting at the feet of the Gurudev, with a proper doubt. And Gurudev's rejoicing heart is unravelling the deep secrets of the scriptures. The Gurudev is eager to clarify the doubt of the disciple. The sixth statement relating to the moksa upaya, is the greatest statement. This statement is like a key to experiencing and properly manifesting the other five statements. This statement is the ultimate attainment. This statement is suitable for bringing into our faith, intellect and practice. This is also the statement that needs most understanding before practice. Now the method for attaining moksa, which the Gurudev indicates to the disciple will be revealed later.

Page #195
... the thought of moksa is the stay in Self The devoted pursuit of the three gems is for the attainment of the ayogi state. A yogi attains the mind-speech-body through yoga, asserts control over them. He can enable the yogas at his whim and fancy. He can peform seemingly wonderful and impossible tasks through the yogas. But the Jain tradition does not attach importance to a Yogi; it upholds the value of the ayogi sadhana. So long as there is yoga, there cannot be total moksa. Even the Kevali Supreme Soul cannot attain Siddhi as long as it travels about with yoga. The moment it quashes all yogas and attains the ayogi state, at that very moment it will attain moksa. There is a doubt in the disciple's mind about the way of attaining moksa. He says, 'O Guru! I have managed to understand with my intellect and place my belief in the explanations you gave for the five statements. Therefore, there is no doubt in me about them.' Brothers! Understanding through intellect is one thing and assimilating it through deliberation is another important thing. The disciple is a thinker, as such he has not become a mere master of logic by accepting the explanations only through his intellect. Neither has he thoughtlessly accepted the principle in blind faith. He has struck a fine balance of intellect and faith both, and absorbed the principle. A principle which has been merely accepted as a custom, but has not been tested with a value for understanding, thoughtfulness, and propriety, does not take long to lose faith in. A faith placed in some person, can soon be lost if it has not been placed with careful consideration. Same goes with a principle. Here the disciple's faith is the result of deliberation. The disciple has become eligible to properly understand the sixth statement and the Gurudev, pleased with the ability of the

Page #196
546 I am the Soul eligible disciple, has become eager to hand over all the knowledge lying within himself. Brothers! A Guru does not pass on his knowledge in the absence of an eligible disciple. Today, several advanced sciences have been lost from our country, only owing to this. For want of proper disciples, the great learned men took away their knowledge with them - they could not gift it to anybody. I refer to a happening of several years ago. Our Grand Master Pujya Tapasviji Shri Manekchandji Maharaj had a great thirst for knowledge. In search of knowledge, he travelled to Marwad in a period when travel in that region used to be a great difficulty. At a young age, he remained serving the Pujya Fakirchandji Maharaj. Pujya Tapasviji Maharaj was so humble and discerning that seeing his abilities Pujya Fakirchandji Maharaj was greatly impressed. He had said, 'My heart is delighted to see the proper ability of this Kathiawadi Sadhu. I was in search of a proper receptacle for the knowledge that was in store within me. I have found it. I shall give all the knowledge I have to him.' And Brothers! With great joy in his heart, Pujya Fakirchandji Maharaj gave away all the knowledge he had to Pujya Tapasviji Maharaj, who later returned from Marwad with this unlimited store. Even in this age, there are such great people who are endowed with the essence of the deep knowledge of the Agamas. If we become eligible, we could also imbibe the essence and the formulas for devotion. If there is any greatest hurdle in the way of our becoming eligible, it is our EGO. I am somebody, somebody special, there is something in me that others do not have - this is the kind of pride which does not let us become eligible. We remain incomplete and as a result, in spite of gaining access to the company of sages and gurus, we cannot absorb what ought to be learnt in their company. If you stand very straight like a palm on the banks of a flowing river, you will not get even a handful of water nor will your thirst get quenched. But if you

Page #197
I am the Soul 547 bend and pick up water in your cupped hands, you can taste sweet water and at the same time it serves to quench your thirst. But only if and when you bend down. Only when pride is removed and humility awakens can something be attained. The eligible disciple places his doubt before the Gurudev with all humility. Now there is a great anxiety. Not merely understanding but a proper understanding and proper practice is what the disciple desires as he approaches the Gurudev. The Gurudev also responds in a matching sentiment and says - pAMce uttarathI thaI, AtmA viSe pratIta; Mist Htetturant, Hect vita g fra.....ple O Disciple! My inner self is experiencing a great joy. I see my effort bearing fruit. You have absorbed the principle and after deliberating over it, you have placed your faith in it. Brothers! How meaningful words Srimadji has selected! 316CHT fa scita "Atma vishe pratit? The disciple has not merely accepted it with his intellect but has taken it right to his soul after contemplating over it. We would have accepted many matters through our intellect. But if we do not reach them to faith, they cannot be brought into practice. And therefore, our knowledge remains merely as information collected by our intellect. By the law of frien Taici farfa 'Jnanasya phalam virati' it does not come into practice. It takes the shape of practice only if it settles in our faith. Gurudev has seen the disciple imbibing knowledge and that is why he is showering extra benevolence on him. He says, "I have given explanation for five statements and you have received them so well, which proves your ability. Therefore, my heart says that you will similarly experience the moksa way very easily. It will not take any time or effort. Understanding the moksa way is a matter of play for a disciple like you with a good intellect. It is like child's play.

Page #198
548 I am the Soul Brothers! You say this quite often in practical life, that doing a certain thing-conning somebody, duping somebody, deceiving somebody is like child's play for me'. But all these games lead to sin and sorrow. I would rather say, that just as understanding the moksa way is easy for the disciple, do something that it becomes easy for you too. Awaken the strength of your faith lying within, develop the ability to attain the principle and you will also find it simple to understand and practice the way to moksa. A tremendous effort is required for this. As the kshayopshama of mohaniya and jnanavarniya karma increases, you will first understand and then it comes into practice. It is possible even for a householder. History is replete with instances of great men who had very easily attained kevalajnana. Chakravarti Bharat had managed to attain kevaljnana in a snap. Think Brothers! Bharat who had gone into the chamber of mirrors to bloat his own ego over his good looks, not only broke his own ego but came out with kevaljnana. How long did it take? And how fanciful that jiva must have been! You see your face everyday in the mirror. You must be looking and feeling proud too. You may even be aware of beauty. Yet how many mirrors would there be with you? One in every room, at best two. But no, Bharat had made a chamber of mirrors. Above, below, front and back all six sides had mirrors and more mirrors. And there he would go to inflate his pride about his beauty. But Brothers! It did not take long to throw away those thoughts. They were dropped very easily. I ask you, when you see your face in the mirror, do you ever remember Bharat? Does it ever occur to you as to why you do not get kevaljnana while looking at the beauty in the mirror. If during enjoyment you remember detachment, then let it be known that moksa upaya can occur to you very easily.

Page #199
I am the Soul 549 Here Gurudev has recognised the eligible disciple and is presenting his knowledge. That is why he says, 'It is quite easy for you to attain moksa upaya.' The benevolent words of the Gurudev overwhelm the disciple. Brothers! There is an unlimited flow of Gurudev's benevolence on the disciple. When does it flow? When do such beautiful words come from the Gurudev? Only when the disciple has such a future. We too desire that our Gurus should only utter words of blessings for us. But Brothers! How can this happen if the Gurudev's heart has not been pleased? However ardently the Gurudev may desire, but our ineligibility will not let him open up his heart to us. Words will not flow from him. Therefore, it is most imperative that we become eligible. After expressing the feelings on his mind, now the Gurudev is presenting a detailed analysis of what moksa upaya is. Explaining where the jiva is faltering, the Gurudev says - karmabhAva ajJAna che, mokSabhAva nijavAsa; siachi 35144 44, TIST FIIchigt .....86 Child! To attain the moksa marga it is necessary to understand and avoid ignorance. What is ignorance? The gatha says - fura 3431 , Karmabhava ajnana che. To accept the state, that has developed due to the rise of karma, as our own state - as our own true form is karmabhava. If somebody were to ask us - Who are you? We would reply - I am a human. That is right. If you were to forget other classifications and from the humanitarian viewpoint it would be right to say so. But spiritually speaking it would be ignorance to believe that 'I am a human'. For attaining the human state is the result of rise of karma - Bitcifu' ya audaika bhava. When the jiva gets bonded in manushya gati nama karma and the ayushya karma of manushya, it becomes manushya - human - as a result. Simultaneously, the sense organs that it

Page #200
550 I am the Soul gets - five sense organs are also due to the rise of nama karma, the higher status is due to the rise of Gotra karma. Beauty of the bodily form is due to the rise of yudiacha qef shatavedaniya karma. Thus the form that we now have is only due to the rise of karma. Therefore it is an affected form. In the original true form of the jiva there is no manushya gati, no sense organs, no high status, no faculties of the body or mind etc. So these are all the perverse states of the jiva. It is extreme ignorance to accept these states as the true form of the self. This state is subject to decay, it cannot be permanent. While the atma is an eternally pure substance. To get attached to the states so received, to love them is ignorance. There is no ignorance like placing attachment with the state received due to the rise of karma, believing it as our own and forgetting that the true original form of the self is pure, intelligent and eternally blissful natural disposition. The true original form of the self is moksa. To remain forever in the own atma is moksa. We have to reside in the Self. So far we have accepted the pudgala transitions as our own self and resided in them; coming out of those and stabilising in the Selfis the feeling of moksa. To attain such a feeling of moksa, the darkness of ignorance has to be destroyed and that happens only with the entry of the light of knowledge, not otherwise. A small lamp is sufficient to dispel darkness. But it has to appear. The great poet Rabindranath has presented a beautiful idea in one of his poems - The shadows of the evening are lengthening. Sun is on his way to setting. There is a sadness on his face. He has turned pale due to the worries. The human world, animal world, vegetation world are all present before him. Somebody asked him, "O Sun Lord! Why is there such a sadness in you as you leave?' The Sun replied, "I am going. The entire world will sink into darkness. It will be some time before I can return. Who will do the job of providing light to the world until then?

Page #201
I am the Soul 551 All were stunned. Who can handle the great job of the Sun? None had an answer. Just then a tiny lamp lying in a corner uttered : 'O Lord! Pardon me! I am a feeble fellow. My body is very small. But I cannot bear to see your sadness and hence I shall do whatever best I can while you are away.' And the Sun climbed down the horizon with a content smile. Brothers! Where there is no sunlight, there a tiny lamp can certainly spread some light. A bright ray of knowledge is sufficient to dispel the darkness of ignorance lying within us. Therefore, let us first manifest the bheda-vijnana of the independent identity of body and atma. Srimadji has said the -- same thing - aMdhakAra ajJAna sama, nAze jJAna prakAza andhakar ajnana sama, nashe jnana prakash - Darkness cannot remain, when the light of knowledge emerges. Once darkness went crying to Lord Brahma. Tears were rolling down from his eyes. Brahma asked: "Brother! Who are you? Why do you cry?" "O Lord! I am darkness! I have a petition." "*Petition? What petition would you have?" "O Lord! Light has been chasing me. Wherever I go he follows and does not let me stay at all. What have I done to him? Why is he after me?" "Is that so? Send for Light! What does he think! Everybody in this world has a right to exist." Light was sent for. He came laughing. He was presented before Brahma. But he did not have any worry. There was no reason to cry. With folded hands he bowed and said, "Lord! Why was I sent for?"

Page #202
552 I am the Soul "Yes, come in! You have committed a crime. You shall be punished." "Lord! What crime! Please tell me!" "Why do you chase darkness around? You go and chase him out of wherever he is! You do not let him remain anywhere at all. Do you have the only right to this world?' "But, Lord! Who told you this?" "Darkness himself came here crying." "Lord, O Lord! Please pardon me! In my unrestrained wandering of infinite time, I have never seen darkness! I do not even know how he looks!" Brothers! So true! Where there is light, darkness cannot remain at all. So how would he have seen darkness? Well, we need to manifest this ray of light, so that the darkness of ignorance shall not remain. Our thinking that body is the soul, or mistaking the mind, life or senses for the soul is our ignorance. Let us manifest the bheda-vijnana to dispel this ignorance. First of all - The differentiation between animate and inanimate i.e. bheda-vijnana. Body and soul are separate. Body is inanimate while atma is chetan. Secondly - The differentiation between natural and affected disposition. Knowledge etc. are the natural disposition of the soul, while anger etc., are the affected disposition. Thirdly - Differentiation between the transformations in the states of original disposition - paryayas - and its gunas. While gunas are eternal, the paryayas are momentary. Fourthly - Guna-dravya bheda-vijnana. Dravya is where the gunas reside. I am atma the dravya and knowledge etc. are my gunas.

Page #203
I am the Soul 553 Thus being able to differentiate in so many ways i.e. bheda vijnana, is knowledge and when this manifests, ignorance vanishes. The state of attachment is the wandering of the jiva, it is ignorance. In the pure state of the jiva, there is no place for attachment etc. A firm belief in this, is knowledge. Knowledge is light. Without light, the path cannot be seen; you cannot walk the path, there cannot be progress. Only when there is light can you step on. Here Gurudev is disclosing the path of moksa to the disciple. The first requirement there is of the light of knowledge. He says that only then you can step ahead. So it is our duty to first remove ignorance and manifest knowledge. To explain this statement, there is a detailed analysis over almost 22 gathas, so that the disciple may understand the moksa upaya properly. So more in the next ...

Page #204
So the state of break-through . . . The devoted pursuit of the three gems, happens only after the awakening of the moksa bhava. From infinite time, the jiva has been lying in the state of bondage. All the transformations of the jiva until now, were on account of the bondage. The affected transformations have at some places led the jiva to good karmas while at others they have led to evil karmas. This state of bondage is the state of ignorance, it is the state of karma. Both the good and evil karmas have been called karma bhava and karma bhava has been called ignorance. That is to say that evil bhava is ignorance and good bhava is ignorance too. Why so? A Mithyatvi jiva binds both papa and punya karma. It is not as if being a Mithyatvi, it binds only papa karma. Even such a jiva has a tapering off of kashayas. The shubha yogas of mindspeech and body prevail, so there is punya bandha. And even after attaining samyaktva, the jiva continues to bind both papa and punya through good and evil thoughts. When the punya bhava and papa bhava of both types of jivas is termed as ignorance, then what is the difference between the two? Both have been called ignorant. But no, it is not so! First of all let us be clear that the bondage of punya and papa has not been termed as ignorance. The thoughts have been called ignorance. That is to say, the interest in karmabhava, the affection therein has been called ignorance. A Mithyatvi jiva does have an interest in karmabhava, an attachment towards it and therefore that bhava of its is in the form of ignorance. But a samakit jiva's mati jnana and shruta jnana have transcended the stage of ignorance and have now come into the form of knowledge. As a result its vision of the true form of the self is clear. The attachment towards the karma bhava is severed due to a firm belief within, that the self is the

Page #205
I am the Soul 555 atma, independent of everything, unattached and therefore karma bhava is not the bhava of the self but only a perversion. This is the difference between a Mithyatvi jiva and a samakit jiva. Karma bondage is not ignorance, the karma thought is ignorance. In the samakit, the karma bhava would have been left behind and the moksa bhava would now be manifest. Now, Srimadji talks about the reasons of karma bandha and its path - je je kAraNa baMdhanA, teha baMdhano paMtha; a alcut Goh G911, Targ wa sia .....88 Attachment and aversion are the two major reasons of karma bandha. With a little elaboration - mithyatva, avrata, pramada, kashaya and yoga are the five reasons of karma asrava and bandha. The presence of these reasons and the attachment towards them holds down the jiva on that path. Normally it so happens that we can understand a person having an attachment towards some thing or somebody. But how can there be attachment for attachment? It is not a substance visible to the eyes that we may see and develop an attachment towards it. But if we evaluate our inner self we realise that we go so much out of the way to appease a person so that the attachment that we have in him continues unabated. How well we look after him! How we try to please him with body, mind and wealth! Even if we do not have the means, sometimes we go beyond our means and how we exert to retain the attachment with the attached person! In fact, even without doing none of this for the other person, the feeling of attachment within us still needs to be fed. Without dependence it does not get fed. Therefore, we make this person a prop and pamper the feeling of attachment that is within us. What an effort just to ensure that the attachment of that person towards us does not reduce in any way! This is attachment towards attachment.

Page #206
556 I am the Soul Same goes for aversion too. You will make all efforts to feed the feeling of aversion that you have for a person. You will feel pleased to see ill happen to him, hear ill about him. If you cannot spoil anything for him, and if somebody else does, you will develop a feeling of attachment for that person. Thus we feed the feeling of aversion lying within us. So long as the feeling of feeding attachment and aversion is lying in us, the free state of atma does not manifest. The attachment for bondage further grips the bondage. How can those who have a love for bondage develop a love for freedom at all? That is why moksa bhava does not arise. And this path of attachment and aversion is the path of bondage. If a state that can break-through these reasons occurs within, only then can the lead to moksa be caught. The state occurs naturally. Once it appears within us, it somehow finds a direction. It needs no guidance. What is this state? Brothers! We have experienced the state of attachment and aversion. When we see a beloved person or thing, or for that matter when we even hear their name, or when we even think of them every pore in us is filled with joy, there is happiness all over, we begin to sway in happy memories. We again throw ourselves into old experiences. We lose track of the time that is lost in doing this. This is a state of attachment which the jiva easily slips into; which needs no effort at all to be awakened. The state of aversion is equally easy to the jiva. That is why the enmity with somebody sometimes gets carried on for lives together. Even if a direct opportunity is not available, you wish such great ill in your mind for the enemy. What feelings of jealousy and hate must you be harbouring for this purpose! All these thoughts very easily awaken in the atma.

Page #207
I am the Soul 557 Only if a greater ease, than the ease with which the state of attachment or aversion comes to us, appears in attaining a state free from attachment and aversion, can the end of the path of bondage be seen. The tradition of attachment etc. has been continuing from infinite time. The atma has not yet awakened the strength to break through it. When it awakens, there will be a decline in attachment etc. Otherwise attachment etc. are quite strong. They will not allow the strength of the soul to awaken at all. Hence, the jiva has to awaken the strength of the soul with an effort. The first state in this process is the samakit. Only when the jiva stops the asrava of mithyatva, the sanvar of samakit is born and one link of the infinite tradition is broken in between. Jiva has made efforts to control anger etc. but has not succeeded in them, will not succeed. First of all there have to be efforts to remove mithyatva. When mithyatva is removed, the anantanubandhi kashayas (binding from infinite time) are bound to go away. The remaining apratyakhyani, pratyakhyani and sanjwalan kashayas then can hardly exert their strength. They will certainly make their presence felt, try to create hurdles, but the jiva by now has a key with it, that is purushartha - a supreme effort, with the help of which it will progress. The atma would have garnered strength enough to put up a fight against the kashayas. The jiva might sometimes lose the fight, but will rise again and face with courage and eventually the kashayas will have to concede defeat. Freedom is truly achieved when they are removed. Once mithyatva is trounced and despatched, the natural state to do all this awakens in the atma. Just as the state of attachment etc. is seen to appear naturally in the atma which is the affected disposition, so too when the jiva begins to come into the natural disposition, the moksadasha appears naturally.

Page #208
558 I am the Soul The feelings of attachment etc. constitute mithyatva. Mithyatva is of many types. Among them, not having a resolute, unwavering faith in the Jineshwar and his path also constitutes a type of mithyatva. Unless there is a faith in the word of the Jineswhar, unless there is dedication to the path indicated by him, unless there is a total devotion towards Jineshwar, the jiva cannot reach self-realisation. Mithyatva will not be removed and Samyak darshan cannot be achieved. When there is such an unwavering faith in the Jineshwar, anything may happen, any damage whether materially, physically or psychologically may occur, but the faith in the Jineshwar is unmoved. It does not get displaced. Faith in these three - Arihant, the Lord; Nirgrantha, the Guru and benevolent dharma defined by the Kevali, begins to dwell within. The jiva will accept only the absolutely Veetarag as the Lord. Nothing short of the state of Veetarag will do. Any person with the effects of attachment etc., cannot be in the category of the Lord. Such should be the unwavering faith in the samakit. There is an anecdote from the times of Bhagawan Mahaveer. Prabhu was in Champapuri. The Samavasaran was in progress. Numerous humans and devas are present there to absorb the sermon of the Prabhu. When the sermon got over, a mendicant by name Ambad, who was a devotee of the Prabhu, came over to him and said: "Prabhu! I am headed for Rajgruhi. Is there any message? "Oh yes! Ambad! The chariot-man of Raja Shrenik, the king of Rajgruhi is very devoted. Give his wife Sulasa, the message of dharma!" Ambad went away with bowed head, but his mind was all disturbed. A great person like Mahaveer, Lord of the three worlds, revered by devas and demons, sending a dharma message for

Page #209
I am the Soul 559 some nondescript woman! What's in this? There seemed something fishy. Brothers! How perverse is the human mind! It does not spare doubting even the Veetarag, not to mention the ordinary sages. When some devotee spends more time with the sages, then don't you all begin to doubt? What's this? Why does this person frequently visit the sages? What's cooking? What do the sages have but religion to peddle? But does the human mind understand? Ambad reached Rajgruhi. But the doubt in his mind would not disappear. How is this Sulasa? Should I find out? He went to the outskirts of Rajgruhi and assumed the form of Lord Brahma. People started flocking towards him thinking actually the Lord Brahma had himself appeared. Everybody ran to him, but Sulasa did not go even when somebody called her. So Ambad changed his form to Vishnu, and then Shiva. People came in the thousands. But Sulasa sat at her place unperturbed. Sulasa was not to be seen and Ambad was surprised. He then decided that now Sulasa should come - he took the form of Bhagawan Mahaveer himself. Now the people flocking to see him, called Sulasa and said, Come now, Sulasa! Now that your Lord Mahaveeer has come.' But Sulasa's reply was very meaningful, very touching. She said, "No, my Sister, no! If my Lord were to come, my Self would certainly have told me of it! Why only in the city, had my Lord been anywhere near the city, my mind would be overflowing with joy. Here I feel absolutely no vibrations, hence it is not my Mahaveer, but somebody else. Go away! She never went. Brothers! Think! How her faith for her Lord had got woven into Sulasa's atma! So that when her Lord came, the message would be received from her own inner self. Nobody need carry any message. Unique devotion, indeed! How unwavering this loyalty! How dedicated this faith!

Page #210
560 I am the Soul She never went. Ambad stretched far as he could see, but could not find Sulasa. He thought, "What sort of a woman is this? Why doesn't she come? Wait, let me try another test. He changed his form again. This time as a Jain Sadhu, he carried the rajjoharan and patra with him, and presented himself in the courtyard of Sulasa's home. He spoke the Dharmalabha. Hearing him say it, Sulasa ran out full of devotion and welcomed him with folded hands. She sang his praises and was elated to have got the opportunity of supatradana. That's when Ambad in the form of the Sadhu, asked for a sacheta thing. And Sulasa was stunned. She said, "Pardon me, Sir! Either you are an impostor or you have forgotten the Jineshwar's dharma. A Sadhu should not ask for unthinkable things. Please forgive me! I am a follower of the Jineshwar. I shall not give you any sacheta thing. Please go away!' Now it was Ambad's turn to be stunned. He was overwhelmed. Seeing the unique loyalty towards Jineshwar and the path he preached, even a labdhidhari Sadhak like him fell at Sulasa's feet. He appeared in his original form and said, "Sulasa! You are just like the Prabhu said. I took so many forms to test you. I tried to entice you but you were not to be tempted. How great is your loyalty, your steadiness! Sulasa, Prabhu has sent the dharma Sandesh only for you. In this great city of Rajgruhi, you are the only fortunate one to whom Prabhu has sent the message. Sulasa took the dharma Sandesh and touched it to her forehead. She said, "Please forgive me! But my devotion is dedicated at the feet of my Lord. Nowhere else will my devotion bow. You or the other gods may well be respected but for me only my Lord is the one for whom my faith is reserved. My mind does not accept anything else!'

Page #211
I am the Soul 561 Brothers! When Krishna went away to Mathura from Gokul, - he pined for the Gopikas. So a friend of his by name Uddhav came to Gokul to find out what was so special about the Gopikas. On reaching Gokul, he tried to tell the Gopikas that Krishna had forgotten them and that they should give him up and turn their devotion towards the formless Brahma. The reply that he got from the Gopikas then is very meaningful too - jyo! mana nAMhI dasa - bIsa eka huto jo gayo syAma saMga ant 31279 $91.... A TIET GH - H .. "O Uddhav! We do not have 10 or 20 minds. We had but one and it has gone away with Shyam. So who is going to pray to your formless Eshwar.' In other words, the Gopikas were devoted to Krishna with total dedication. Sulasa's devotion was similar. Her heart never bowed to anyone other than Mahaveer. She was filled to the core with an unparalleled devotion. The feelings she expresses for the Prabhu are just like what Shri Manatungasuriji has used while singing the praises of Bhagawan Rishabhdeva - manye varaM hariharAdaya eva daSTA daSTeSu yeSu hRdayaM tvayi toSameti / kiM vIkSitena bhavatA bhuvi yena nAnyaH kazcinmano harati nAtha! bhavAntarepi // 21 / / O Prabhu! It was good that I saw the other Gods too, for now, after having seen them I have your true recognition and as a result now my mind does not stray anywhere else but remains with you. Thus unwavering devotion towards the Arihanta deva is the source of samakita. With samakita the jiva's confusion is overcome. The jiva knows that its form is the same as that of the

Page #212
562 I am the Soul Jina. I am the Soul, the Supreme Soul. I can manifest my Supreme state. Apart from this, imagining bliss of the self in par - other than the self- is also mithyatva. With a misplaced goal the jiva continues to wander in confusion. If the jiva has to find its path to moksa then it has to abandon the belief that there is happiness in para other than the self i.e in body etc. and indulging in pudgalas. My bliss is within myself. I am the pure eternal atma in the form of energy, with infinite bliss as the natural disposition. My true original form is total bliss of knowledge. I am pure, unattached. When such realisation of the original form of the jiva prevails, it is the state of freedom from bondage abandhadasha. When such a state occurs, the path of bondage via mithyatva is cut off, and then the moksa path is found. - Srimadji says in the gatha that the jiva immersed in the causes of bandha is progressing on the path of bondage. But when a state which can break through such causes appears in the atma, the path to moksa is attained, and results in ending of the bhava. More methods of attaining this moksa path have been told later..

Page #213
... prime entanglement of Karma Devoted pursuit of the three gems breaks through the tangle of the infinite. The jiva becomes free from the entanglement. What tangle is this? What does it do? It is worthy of a thought. Yarn in its original form is free of any tangles, it is straight. It can even pass through the fine eye of a needle. Even while stitching clothes with a needle and thread, the thread can pass through the cloth if is straight, but if it has a knot it cannot proceed, it gets stuck. If you succeed in straightening the knot then it is fine, otherwise you have to cut the thread. So where there is a knot, a tangle there is a brake. When there is a brake, there is no progress. If we were to discuss the practical world, the relations between various people will be smooth sailing only as long as there is no tangle of misunderstanding between them. Once such a tangle occurs, then everything begins to take a turn for the worse. Then it is only a matter of crossing swords. So long as there are good relations, berating each other in a little leg-pulling even sounds good. But when the relations sour then even a straightforward matter sounds questionable. When there is a knot, a tangle, relations tend to get stuck. But the knot that is necessary is the one at the end of the thread. If you do not tie a knot at the end of the thread while stitching, the thread will not remain on the cloth, it will pass through. Hence, this knot is useful. Similarly even in practical life, relationship is the knot of friendship. In the absence of this knot, relations cannot be developed, they cannot be lasting. Only the knot of friendship can make the relations last. Even in spiritual life, it is necessary to understand the knots of both types. Which knot is the one that gets you stuck and which is the one that is useful? Here Srimadji is telling us the

Page #214
564 I am the Soul method for attaining moksa. Therein he explains as to what is necessary to be done foremost. Earlier instead of talking about vows-activities-rituals, he said, the ignorance of the jiva, which is a result of the karma bhavana should be destroyed and moksa bhava, which is like residing in the Self, should be awakened. Once the moksa bhava is awakened, the vows and rituals automatically, naturally come into practice. No effort is required for that. Further, after explaining that by giving in to the causes of bandha, we progress on the path of bandha while with the causes of moksa, it is possible to progress on the path of moksa, Srimadji, while explaining the main causes of karma bandha and the resultant tangles, says - rAga dveSa ajJAna e, mukhya karmanI graMtha; thAya nivRtti jethI, te ja mokSano paMtha ..... 100 Primarily attachment, aversion and ignorance are the three knots of karma bandhana. These are the knots that come in the way of spiritual progress of the jiva. We have discussed attachment and aversion several times, moreover we indulge in attachment and aversion everyday, and as such are acquainted with it. These two are the greatest bonds. In Shramana Sutra it is said - dohi baMdhaNehiM, rAga baMdhaNeNa dosa baMdhaNebaMNaM - the two bonds of attachment and aversion are the causes of karma bandhana while the third is ignorance. Ignorance is of two types one is due to the rise of jnanavarniya karma and the other due to the rise of mohaniya karma. There is a difference between both types. Ignorance due to the rise of jnanavarniya karma means that either the intelligence will be low or non-existent. There will not be an ability to understand, a lack of intellect. But that will be the limit of the loss. While the ignorance that comes with the rise of mohaniya karma is in the form of perversion. Knowing a

Page #215
I am the Soul 565 substance as it is is Samyak jnana and not knowing a substance as it is or for that matter knowing it as it is not, foisting the false beliefs of one self on to the substance is a great ignorance. This in other words is called mithyatva. It does not allow the true understanding to arise and confuses the jiva with perverse beliefs which results in a terrible loss. Mithyatva creates the illusion of something being there when it is not; it instils the belief that leads to mistaking a kudeva for sudeva, kuguru for suguru and kudharma for sudharma. In the same way, jiva is mistaken for ajiva and ajiva for jiva. It prohibits the true understanding of the path of the Veetarag. Thus the ignorance due to mohaniya misleads the jiva. The reason why the jiva has not been able to attain moksa until now is this ignorance. While the ignorance due to jnanavarniya does not inflict a very great damage on the jiva. Jiva may not be able to study, may have difficulty in remembering, may not be able to learn things by heart in spite of a great effort - but moksa is not hindered due to all these. The character of Mashatusha Muni is famous in our history. He had a strong rise of jnanavarniya karma. In spite of unlimited effort, he could not remember even a single gatha from the scriptures. He was very sad. Other Munis were experts in the Scriptures, but he could not learn anything. He went and lamented before his Gurudev. The Guru was an experienced great man. He knew that this Sadhu suffered from the rise of a strong jnanvarniya karma. But there were no feelings of mithyatva in him. Attachment and aversion had become subdued, the atma had gone into a state of low karma and subdued passions. To keep up the spirits of the Muni, the Guru gave him a beautiful and meaningful chant -- HTC HTSU - Ma rusha ma tusha, and said, 'O Blessed One! Since you cannot remember much, you merely chant this. You will be able to go through without difficulty'. The Muni started happily chanting the sutra. He was immersed

Page #216
566 I am the Soul in it. Reciting the same sutra through the entire day, he even forgot the ru in rusha and the ma before tusha. What was left was just 'mashatusha' - which he was reciting continuously. And that's how he got the name. . The meaning of the sutra is - do not get angry that is averse in adverse circumstances and do not get happy that is attached in favourable circumstances. In reality, the chanting of the sutra led to the decline of both attachment and aversion and even the Muni did not realise when the two were totally destroyed. And the Muni attained kevaljnana. Brothers! The thick peels of jnanavarniya karma could not last before the equanimity and simplicity of the Muni. It had to give way and the lamp of kevaljnana appeared. He never studied the scriptures, never chanted the gathas, never entered into debates, never gave any discourses, and yet attachment and aversion were totally uprooted. He could thus reach the goal of moksa. Thus the ignorance due to jnanavarniya does not mislead or arrest progress. But the knot in the form of attachment and aversion is the one that arrests the jiva. Attachment, aversion and ignorance are like the knot that is in the middle of the thread-length which do not allow the jiva to take steps of progress. Only if that knot is cut, can the jiva become free from thoughts of mithyatva and attain samyaktva. It is only when the jiva comes into the waxing phase and progresses by increasing the pure thoughts of the atma, that it can exhaust the seven prakritis - namely three of the darshanamohaniya and four of the anantanubandhi - and attain samakit. First the jiva does the yatha pravrittikarana. That is to say, it exhausts the state of 69 krodakodi sagars out of 70 of the mohaniya karma. What is left is the mohaniya of but 1 krodakodi sagar - this process is called yatha pravrittikarana. It does not take the jiva any great effort to reach upto this stage. Even the lowly jivas also manage to reach this stage several times. But

Page #217
I am the Soul 567 they cannot break through the impregnable knot of attachment and aversion. For the lowly jivas do not have the ultra pure effects required for the effort. As a result, even after reaching this stage, they turn back and again add to their mohaniya karma. But when a jiva on the higher plane reaches this stage, and attains a greater flow of pure results, it can destroy the knot of attachment and aversion. In the scriptures, this has been termed as apurvakarana. Such results do not come to the jiva often, they are rare. That is why they are called apurvakarana - never before karana. With the cutting of the knot of attachment and aversion, the jiva's activities display an exemplary purity. This purity is called anivrittikarana. That is, the jiva is now bound to attain samyaktva. It manifests the bheda vijnana and that is why it is called anivrittikarana. Thus, a jiva progressing with pure thoughts, breaks through the knot of attachment and aversion and attains samyaktva. When this knot is disentangled, that is to say, as mentioned earlier, when the three prakritis of darshan mohaniya and the four prakritis of anantanubandhi kashaya namely krodha, mana, maya and lobha are either dissolved through upashama, or through kshayopashama or through kshaya, the jiva either attains aupashamik samyaktva, or kshayopashamika samyaktva or kshayika samakit respectively. One thing needs to be understood here. The kshaya of darshana and mohaniya is imperative for attaining samyaktva. But why is the kshaya - upashama of anantanubandhi in the form of charitra mohaniya prakriti necessary? The passions of anantanubandha remain with mithyatva and lead to infinite bondage of karma. This tradition goes on for infinite time. The relation of mithyatva and anantanubandhi is avinabhavi i.e. they never remain without each other. Where there

Page #218
568 I am the Soul is mithyatva there will be anantanubandhi and vice versa. Both ripen at the same time and moreover they both support each other. That is why if samakit has to be attained one has to wage a war with them both. Only if the two are vanquished can samyaktva be attained. Once samyaktva occurs, a jiva's attaining moksa is certain. If the samyaktva remains sustained, if the pure effects of the atma can turn from strong to stronger to strongest, then the jiva may even attain moksa in the same life. If not, at least after three births, or fifteen births or even later, moksa is bound to happen. Now there is no need to spend infinite time. Once the anantanubandhi, which inflicts infinite bondage, has been demolished, it cannot prevail in spite of its best effort and hence the jiva progresses on the path of moksa. That is exactly what has been said in the gatha - ff jehathI, te ja mokSano paMtha The path which leads to the freedom from attachment, aversion and ignorance is the path to moksa. Here the purushartha for attaining samyaktva is the path to moksa. Once the jiva does this effort and tastes samakit, it does not like to give up that taste. Per chance, if samakit is lost for a while, the jiva does not forget that taste, and it yearns for it and attains the samakit state. And that is how it progresses. That is the path to moksa. Only when the knots of attachment and aversion begin to hurt that the jiva awakens to the desire of taking up such an effort. Brothers! When there is a knot of misunderstanding in the relation with somebody, that knot hurts for the whole life. The jiva feels that it would be best if it could be entangled. It even attempts to do so. So also, only when the knots of attachment and aversion begin to bother, hurt and hamper, can the jiva respect the effort to come out of the mithyatva state to attain samakit..

Page #219
I am the Soul 569 That is what the Gurudev is trying to explain to the disciple - that it is not necessary to search for the moksa path at any intersection. It is very much within us. If one can step inside, the path is there to see. One can find a straight-forward and simple path. Just begin to disentangle the knots of attachment, aversion and ignorance and the path will be clear. Gurudev will further explain about this path.

Page #220
... bereft of any illusion! The devoted pursuit of the three gems helps the jiva attain the original true form. The present form of the jiva is not its original form. It is an illusion on account of the grime of karma. While describing the pure form of the atma, Srimadji is also telling us about the impure form. He also tells us about the need to abandon the impure form and to attain the pure original form. He also says that this is the method through which the path of moksa can be found - AtmA sat caitanyamaya, sarvAbhAsa rahita; jethI kevaLa pAmie, mokSapaMtha te ta 101 Here the characteristics of the atma have been described. Sat and chaitanya - these two characteristics are the pure state of the atma. Illusion is an impure form of the jiva, and the state without illusion is the pure state of the atma. Sat means existence. That which has an eternal existence, which can never be destroyed, is sat. Asat has no creation and sat has no decadence. Gita also says nAsato vidyate bhAvo nAbhAvo vidyate sataH In this universe, that substance which has no existence will never be created anew, and that substance which is in existence can never be destroyed. Earlier in the Atmasiddhi Shastra, while establishing the eternity of the atma, Srimadji has expressed these very thoughts. The atma i.e. chetan - animate and the paramanu i.e jada - inanimate are both eternal in their fundamental form. The element of impermanence in them is their transformation. Transformation gets created as well as destroyed, but the substance itself remains permanent - eternal. The atma too takes on many transformations such as gati, jati etc. They all get destroyed, but the atma in all of them remains.

Page #221
I am the Soul 571 the same. How much ever the wandering in the births, but the atma never gets destroyed. Through all the three times the existence of the atma is the same. It is a substance with eternal existence. In the event when the atma becomes free from all karmas and attains the siddha state, all the external feelings are destroyed but the atma does not lose its existence. Therefore, it is sat. Atma is chaitanyamaya - full of life. The uncommon characteristic of the atma that separates it from all other substances is its chaitanya - life. This characteristic is not there in any other thing but the atma. The jada dravya - inanimate substance is existent but it is bereft of life - chaitanya. There are many other strengths in the inanimate which the world can make use of. But ultimately it is still inanimate. The atma is chaitanya and therefore it lives. The life of the jiva is its chaitanya. Further, since the atma has a life, it is also endowed with knowledge. Knowledge is also an uncommon characteristic of the atma. It does not exist in other substances. Only because knowledge is the characteristic of atma, the atma enlightens the self and others. Atma knows the self as well as other substances. The specialities of the jiva differentiate it from the inanimate. The entire business of this material world is running on account of these specialities. Among the six dravyas, if the jiva also were to be inanimate bereft of life and knowledge, then the shape of this world would have been altogether different. In the same way, atma is sat, it is endowed with chaitanya, and hence it can attain moksa. Had it not been sat, it would itself have got destroyed, and then who would have attained moksa? Indeed, the endless experience of the eternally pure bliss of chaitanya by the atma is itself moksa. Had the atma not been endowed with chaitanya then what would moksa be? Therefore, these special characteristics of atma are proof that it has a moksa.

Page #222
572 I am the Soul Now the third characteristic mentioned is bereft of all illusions' - where there is illusion, there cannot be actuality. Both are diametrically opposite. Illusion is illusion, it cannot be actuality, while actuality is actuality, it is not illusion. Atma is always with chaitanya and knowledge. If we indulge in something which does not have these two characteristics believing it to be atma, then that is the greatest illusion. Until now, the jiva has believed the body to be the atma. It has developed a possessiveness for the body, it has increased the affection towards the body. If the body is inanimate and is bereft of knowledge then how can it be my true form? This contact has occurred on account of the karma sanyoga. Not once, but several times, such sanyoga occurred and even viyoga has happened. In spite of that, the feeling of possession over the body has not gone. Wherever the jiva has taken on a body, it has immediately developed the feeling of l'in it and has been feeding that belief. Due to karma, along with the body, a lot else was attained, but that was all attained by the body and not the atma. The body may be beautiful on account of the rise of nama karma but the atma says, 'I am beautiful'. The body may be born in a high and mighty dynasty on account of the rise of Gotra karma, but the atma says, "I have a great pedigree'. The body may be healthy on account of the rise of shata Vedaniya karma, but the atma says, 'I am happy, I am fortunate, I am endowed with punya'. Thus it has been making an effort to prove every illusion as actuality and has been attaching the l' with 'mine'. The sages say, all these are illusions. Atma is not man, it is not possessing a beautiful body, it does not belong to a high or low dynasty, it is not endowed with punya. All these are the symptoms of the perverse state of the atma. How can they belong to it? Where there is illusion, there cannot be actuality, hence it cannot provide the desired result. Water in a mirage is not

Page #223
I am the Soul 573 actuality but illusion. It can never quench the thirst. In the same way, if the form available to the atma due to affected disposition is mistaken for the true form of the self, it cannot lead to the attainment of spiritual bliss. Srimadji says that merely achieving the true form of the atma that has been told here, is itself the path to moksa. Nothing else remains to be done. The atma acquires a firm realisation that I am the eternally existent, indestructible, everlasting substance of atma. My true form is chaitanya. The characteristic of infinite knowledge is my pure natural disposition. And free from all illusions, I am just the atma! Atma alone. If this realisation occurs to the jiva, then it is on the path to moksa. The reason why the path to moksa was not found is that until now the jiva believed all the material feelings to be its own, and never attempted to extricate itself from them. As a result the jiva merely travelled on the path of this material world and could never rise above it to make an effort to be able to reach the supreme travel. The resultant activity of the atma while making this tremendous effort is the jiva's moksa bhava. And the purushartha in this bhava is the path to moksa. The purushartha bhavas which a jiva can suitably include in its activity on the path to moksa are mentioned later.

Page #224
Karmas are of many types ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems breaks through the bondage of karma remaining on the atma from infinite time. This bondage, in spite of being without a beginning, does have an end. A superior atma can break through these bonds but the bonds of an inferior atma never break. Its bondages neither have a beginning nor an end. Superiority and inferiority are the resultant feelings of the jiva. Why is a certain jiva superior, and why is another jiva inferior? There is no answer to this query. There cannot be any reasons attributed to. This does not happen purposefully, for those are the resultant feelings of the jiva. The other bhavas of the jiva are related to karmas. Namely, audayika bhava, aupashamika bhava, kshayopashamika bhava and kshayika bhava. Audayika bhavas are that state of jiva which occurs due to the rise of any one of the eight karmas. The state of ignorance that occurs in a jiva due to the rise of the jnanavarniya karma is the audayika bhava. Similarly, the bhava that occurs in a jiva due to the rise of various other karmas is also audayika bhava. The aupashamika samyaktva and waning of attachment and aversion that occurs due to the upashama (extinguishing) of mohaniya karma is aupashamika bhava. The jnana and darshana occurring due to the kshayopashama of jnanavarniya and darshanavarniya, the samyaktva occurring due to the kshayopashama of mohaniya and the awakening of the virya and other strengths due to kshayopashama of antaraya and the waning of attachment and aversion, are all kshayopashamika bhava. The kevaljnana, kevaldarshana, kshayika samakit, yathakhyat charitra and anantavirya shakti arising with the

Page #225
I am the Soul 575 kshaya of four ghati karmas - this is the jiva's kshayika bhava. In addition, the siddha state being attained after the total kshaya of eight karmas, i.e. also four aghati karmas, is the kshayika bhava. Thus, all the four bhavas are pertinent to karmas. They are related to karmas. But in the parinamika bhavas of the atma there is no relation to anything. The life in a jiva is also parinamika. If somebody questions, 'Why the jiva lives? Who put the life in it?' or "Why is ajiva lifeless? Who put the lifelessness in it?', then these have no answer. This is not something that can be put in or made out. It is there because it is there. So also bhavyatva and abhavyatva. So many innocent people keep asking as to why God was partial? Why did He make some jivas bhavya and some others abhavya? An abhavya jiva's wandering in the material world is never ending: the poor fellow will observe all vratas and vows, sing prayers and praises, perform pujas, even accept monk-hood and observe the mahavratas perfectly; yet he has no moksa. Why so? All this remains superficial, it does not touch the inner self at all. He remains intact from within, nothing soaks into the self and he cannot avoid the wandering of the world. So why did the Lord make such abhavya jivas! These questions of an innocent jiva are pertinent. But the answer is just that the Lord does not make anybody. He cannot make anything. He has not placed the bhavyatva or abhavyatva in anybody. Both these are the parinamika bhavas of the jiva. The learned present the example of a cupful of green-gram. When this cupful of green-gram is boiled, some four seeds remain hard. They just don't get boiled. Try as you may, many times over, yet they do not soften. Why so? What is it in them? The farmer in whose farm these were grown was asked. He says, *From my whole farm I reaped several qunitals of green gram. I

Page #226
576 I am the Soul had brought them all up in an identical atmosphere. It was the same land, fertiliser, water, light and nurture that all got. Other seeds from the same pod have boiled well, but these four seeds have remained thus. How? Even I do not know how. These were to be so and so they are. Brothers! Asks the scientists, send the seeds to a laboratory! But will that reveal why? No, never. Well, same goes for bhavyatva and abhavyatva. It is jiva's parinamika bhava. It is unintentional. The bhavya jivas can break through the bonds of karma. Therefore, now Srimadji tells us what the bondages of karma are and how many - karma anaMta prakAranAM, temAM mukhye ATha; mAM mukhye mohanIya, haNAya te kahuM pATha 102 We have been told that karmas are of eight types. But here it is said they are of infinite types. Every jiva has a bondage of karma from time to time. We have already deliberated upon the reasons for this bondage. A jiva gets bound with karmas as a result of feelings of attachment and aversion. We all know from experience that these results are not always identical. There is always a loss and gain of the six gunas of intense or moderate feelings. And each one of them has so many types! A jiva may develop a moderate feeling of attachment once, at the next moment it might be moderate of a different type and another type in the third moment. Thus moderate feeling of attachment itself can be of several types. Similarly, there would be several types of more moderate and most moderate. As also several types of intense, more intense and most intense. In this regard, one jiva in just one life, will be affected by infinite types of feelings of attachment etc. Whenever and whatever be the affectation, matching karmas get bound at the.

Page #227
I am the Soul 577 same time. If affectations are of infinite types, then karmas too are of infinite type. In a supremely pure jiva, there are infinite virtues. These infinite virtues get perverted due to karma, and that is when infinite affectations of attachment and aversion arise in the jiva. These affectations bind infinite karma. These karmas further suppress the infinite virtues. Thus the cycle of infinite goes on and on. That is why it has been said that karma is of infinite types. The sages, in their own enlightenment, have seen such various affectations and the various karmas that bind due to them. An affected jiva cannot understand this matter with its intellect and hence the sages have divided and classified these infinite affectations into eight types. Those affectations which looked similar, were classified as one category. They called it say, jnanavarniya. What covers avarana - the jnana is all a curtain. Whether thick, thin, light, heavy, strong, worn out, they are all curtains. So they believed, and categorised all these curtains on knowledge as one and called them jnanavarniya. Similarly, other karmas were also explained. Indeed, the reason why these infinite karmas were classified as eight karmas was that in the totally pure and omniscient Siddha Paramatma eight gunas appeared, which were the most valuable among the infinite gunas. For the fading of every one type of karma, one guna appeared. Thus, the karmas which could suppress eight gunas have been categorised as eight types. And thus all infinite karmas were classified within these eight types. They are - 1. Jnanavarniya, 2. Darshanavarniya, 3. Vedaniya, 4. Mohaniya, 5. Ayushya, 6. Nama, 7. Gotra, and 8. Antaraya. 1 In these eight karmas, four are of the ghati type and four others are of aghati type. Jnanavarniya, Darshanavarniya, Mohaniya and Antaraya are the ghati karmas. The other four are aghati karmas. Ghati karmas can be understood in two ways. One understanding can be that because these karmas suppress the.

Page #228
I am the Soul valuable gunas of the atma, do not allow them to appear, these karmas are called ghati karmas. The jnanavarniya suppresses the anantajnana guna, the darshanavarniya suppresses the anantadarshana guna, the mohaniya suppresses the anantasukha and the antaraya suppresses the anantavirya guna. As long as these four karmas rule, the gunas, that are in the form of the pure true disposition of the atma, do not appear. Not allowing the gunas to appear is as good as destroying (ghat to destroy) them. Otherwise, the karmas do not have in them the power to totally destruct the gunas of the atma. They merely do not allow them to appear. 1=1 578 If we considered the other way, the jiva, when it performs the tremendous effort, can destroy all these four karmas in one stroke. All the pursuit by the jiva until now has been for the destruction of these four karmas. The foremost battle was with the mohaniya. With the vanquishing of mohaniya, the other three disappeared. Indeed, a jiva can suppress -- attain kshayopashama of - all four karmas. And with a great effort, can totally destroy them. That is to say, the jiva has the strength in it to destroy these four karmas, however strong they may be. In fact, that is the aim of the jiva. For aghati karmas, nothing requires to be done. Those miserable karmas do arise when their time arrives, but they do not obstruct the natural stability of the jiva. The one who has vanquished four ghati karmas and attained kevaljnana, does still have four aghati karmas. But they are burnt out and disposable. They cannot do anything. Their existence is only until the ghati karmas exist. It is true that these aghati karmas will get destroyed in the same bhava as the ghati karmas. They cannot stay on. Of course, it is also true that in a kevali parmatma, after attainment of kevaljnana, these four aghati karmas may well not cause any trouble, may well not create any perversion, but they do delay the attainment of moksa. The kevali has to remain with the body.

Page #229
I am the Soul 579 as long as these aghati karmas remain. But it should also be understood that the state of the atma of a kevali is in no way different from that of the Siddha parmatma. Therefore, a kevali may well be with a body, but is free from life. That is why, the aghati karmas are no obstruction. The quintessence is that a jiva cannot make any effort to destroy the aghati karmas. These karmas are not destructible through effort; they disappear after their time runs out. No effort can destroy them before that. Whereas, the jiva's tremendous effort is very useful in destroying ghati karmas. However long their duration may be, the jiva can shorten it, bring the karmas to ripen, suffer them and then get absolved of them with a tremendous effort. Thus, while the four ghati karmas have the strength to totally suppress the four anantagunas, the jiva not only has the strength to suppress the ghati karmas, but also to totally destroy them. The jiva has the great strength to raze down the karmas. Among the ghati karmas, the important one is the mohaniya. For the mohaniya karma not only suppresses the anant kshayika samakit, kshayika charitra, kshayika sukha, but simultaneously generates perversions such as mithyatva, dukha, attachment and aversion. Perversion is a very dangerous thing. One decaying thing can spoil all others. Decay is the root cause of all illnesses. Ayurveda says that the human body is a composition of the three energies of vata, pitta and kapha. All three are useful to the body. But even if one of them develops an imbalance, the body develops an illness. That is damaging. Allopathy says that the body has all the bacteria of all the illnesses. As long as they are in a balance, they are beneficial to the body. But the moment, there is an imbalance and decay sets in, the body is engulfed by illnesses; the bacteria turn detrimental.

Page #230
580 I am the Soul In the same way, the valuable gunas of the atma are always beneficial but when the decay in the form of mohaniya sets in and begins to spread, attachment-aversion-ignorance begin to grow. If there is something that can make a jiva miserable in practical life as also in spiritual life, it is this attachment-aversion. But the mohaniya makes the jiva so unconscious that it does not realise what it is doing. It is even unaware whether its own activity is proper or improper. Where mohaniya gathers strength, other karmas too begin to support it, and it grows stronger and stronger. That is why mohaniya has been called the King of Karmas. During the period of sadhana, the jiva wages a war against mohaniya alone. Once mohaniya is vanquished, others are easily conquerable. Srimadji has also said - eka viSayane jItatAM jItyo sau saMsAra; Tafa Uimni silfra, gos, ge sfecr.... Passions are a malaise caused by mohaniya. Once mohaniya is conquered, everything else can be conquered. Now, what the categories and sub-categories of mohaniya are, and how they can be vanquished, will be the topic later.

Page #231
Enlightenment and Veetaraag State destroy... The pursuit of the three gems demolishes the hurdles in the way of moksa. All the causes of karma bondage are hurdles in the way of attaining moksa. Therefore, it is prudent to first understand them. Primarily, let us discuss the mohaniya. Srimadji has told us that among the infinite karmas, there are eight important and that of these eight, mohaniya is the foremost. What are the causes of mohaniya bondage? What are the feelings that prevail when mohaniya arises? And what are the means of breaking the bondage of mohaniya? All these three subjects need to be addressed. In the Tattvarthadhigam Sutra, the cause of mohaniya karma bondage has been told - kevalizrutasaMgha dharmadevAvarNavAdo darzana mohasya / 6-15 Avarnavada of - that is denigrating - kevali parmatma, the knowledge, sangha and dharma cause the bondage of Darshana Mohaniya Karma. Denigrating kevalis and others, planting nonexistent blemishes on them, as also trying to establish them as falsehood in several ways leads to the bondage of Darshana Mohaniya Karma. kaSAyodayAttIvAtmapariNAmazcAritramohasya / 6-15 The affectation on the self due to passions, leads to Charitra Mohaniya karma. Extreme anger, pride, avarice, greed all lead to binding Charitra Mohaniya karma. Whatever the nature of feeling, that will be the karma bondage. If there is anger - krodha, then there will be the bondage of krodha mohaniya. So also if there is the rise of pride - mana, then there will be mana mohaniya. Thus for the rise of every feeling, there will be the respective bondage. Indeed, if there is a rise of a strong passion

Page #232
582 I am the Soul and one gets mixed up with it, the bondage is also strong. But if the jiva can maintain equanimity even in the midst of a rise of strong passion; can avoid the expression of the passion in mind, speech or body, then as a result of not having given in to the rising passion, there is no karma bondage. Similarly, if the rise of the passions is mild, the bondage is also light. And if one does not get mixed up with these arising passions, there is no bondage. Thus the cause of mohaniya karma is the arising of mohaniya itself. Among the causes of Darshanamohuniya, the denigration of kevalins and others is believed to be one, but that denigration occurs on account of aversion. We do not denigrate somebody about whom we do not have aversion. Developing aversion is in itself the rise of mohaniya. Therefore, the cause of darshana mohaniya is the rise of mohaniya. Attachment, aversion and mithyatva are the main feelings which are prevalent upon the rise of mohaniya. If we are to consider them in detail, then Darshanamohaniya has three parts - 1. Mithyatva mohaniya - which prohibits the awakening of true faith, 2. Mishra mohaniya - which prohibits the distinguishing of the true differences between the path of Jina visavis other paths, 3. Samyaktva mohaniya - which prohibits the occurrence of pure realisation in the form of kshayika samakit and upasham samakit. Charitra Mohaniya has 25 types. Of which 16 are kashayas. On the basis of their logic, they have been divided into 4 categories. Anantanubandhi - that which binds for infinity - anger, pride, avarice, greed. This is extremely strong. It prohibits even the touch of samyaktva; engrosses jiva in perverse beliefs. Apratyakhyani anger, pride, avarice, greed. This is strong. It prohibits the practice of faith in the form of vows etc. in spite of attaining samyaktva.

Page #233
I am the Soul 583 Pratyakhyani anger, pride, avarice, greed. This is mild. Allows practice of vows etc. to some extent but prohibits the awakening of feelings of detachment. Sanjwalana anger, pride, avarice, greed. This is milder. It does not allow the total Veetaraag state to occur. There are 9 nokashayas. Those which are not kashayas but which trigger the kashayas -- joy, sorrow, rati, arati, fear, jugupsa, striveda, purshaveda and napunsakaveda. All nine names are self explanatory. Thus with the rise of mohaniya karma, such feelings always prevail. We experience this day in and day out. Now Srimadji tells us the means of destroying Mohaniya Karma. karma mohanIya bheda be, darzana cAritra nAma; gut ata aratat, 3rych 3474 314 . . . . . 803 As mentioned earlier Mohaniya karma is of two types - Darshana mohaniya and Charitra Mohaniya. The perversion of the atma's virtue of shraddha - faith is mithyatva, that is Darshana mohaniya, and the perversion of the virtue of charitra - conduct, is attachment and aversion, that is Charitra Mohaniya. If we were to consider every activity of our life, it would appear as if we were living only to nourish perversion. Behind every act of ours there is invariably attachment, aversion or mithyatva. In fact, we take great pleasure in indulging in these feelings, and not just that, we insist that what we are doing is the right thing happening. Well, how can perversion be a good thing? It cannot. That is why there is this talk of demolishing it. And how? How it can be demolished has been told in the Shastras. Sages have said that perversion is endless in the atma. Even if you try to remove it one after the other, it continues to grow. Hence it should be

Page #234
584 I am the Soul left alone. But you can manifest your natural disposition. Passions decline in the same degree in which the natural disposition manifests. No effort is necessary to remove them. Just as the snakes on Sandalwood trees run away upon hearing the cries of the Peacock, passions too go away as the natural disposition awakens. To remove Darshanamohaniya, it is essential to manifest 'Bodha' - understanding. The meaning of Bodha is worth understanding, it is quite illustrative. Let us observe the sequence in which we acquire knowledge, when we first come to know a substance. The interaction of a substance and our senses, leads to a 'samanya avabodha' - a simple acquaintance. You just feel that there is something. That is 'darshana'. After realising that there is something, there is the inquiry as to what it is. That inquiry is 'avagraha' - perception. Then there is the quandary whether it is this or that. This situation where it is difficult to conclude is 'iha' - conception. Subsequently, the conclusive knowledge acquired through various indicators that this is it, is 'avaya' - conclusion. After the conclusion, holding it in memory for a long time is 'dharana' - retention. All these procedures are gone through in a very short time, and as such we are unaware that knowledge was acquired through such a long sequence. We presume that we saw a particular substance and immediately acquired knowledge about it. The knowledge about a substance is called "Bodha'. In the same way, knowing the pure, blemish-less, dispassionate, glow like form of the atma in manifest, through listening to the advice of the Sadguru and contemplating over it, is 'bodha'. It may be called the bodhibija -- the seed of enlightenment, bhedavijnana - the science of discerning, or atma sakshatkar - self realisation. With the awakening of such a Bodha, the perverse beliefs from

Page #235
I am the Soul 585 infinite time get dissolved. The thinking that I am the doer' and "I am the sufferer' is overcome, and the clear understanding that the self is the omniscient soul begins to prevail. This 'bodha' itself is capable of demolishing the Darshanamohaniya. It may well demolish it through upashama bhava, or kshayopashama bhava or kshayika bhava, but it does not let the Darshanamohaniya remain. The demolition of charitra mohaniya is through the Veetaraag state. Veetaraug state is when there is no attachment or aversion. Where there is a complete stability in the soul. The instability of the soul is due to charitra mohaniya. Charitra mohaniya begins to weaken in the degree in which the stability of the soul begins to increase. Charitra mohaniya is such that it can diminish only gradually. Nojiva can totally remove it at one instance at once. A jiva with lightened karma, after attaining kshayika samakit may well totally destroy charitra mohaniya in a fraction of a moment. But it does take that long. As attachment and aversion begin to diminish, charitra mohaniya begins to wane too. Total elimination of attachment and aversion is the Veetaraag state. That is when not even a degree of charitra mohaniya can remain. Jiva attains its original dispassionate form which is full of sat-chit-ananda. This gradually developing state is also otherwise described as the progress in the gunasthanas. By the fourth gunasthana, the jiva has partially attained the Veetaraag state, as a result of which the charitra mohaniya in the form of infinitely bonding kashayas, weakens considerably. As the jiva progresses into the fifth gunasthana, it destroys the apratyakhyani kashayas and by the time it reaches the sixth gunasthana, it destroys the prutyakhyani kushayas. Then by the time it passes through the seventh, eighth and ninth gunasthanas, it demolishes the sanjwalana kashayas of anger, pride, avarice and greed and the nine kashayas. Now what is left is merely sukshma lobha, which it destroys in the tenth gunasthana. By the twelfth gunasthana, complete Veetaraug state is developed.

Page #236
586 I am the Soul For the manifestation of this Veetaraag state, one has to experimentally contemplate incessantly over the pure original form of the atma." 'I am the Soul' -- not the body. Body etc. are all different from me. Karmas are different from me. Affected disposition is different. I am not in the form of attachment etc. but am in the form of knowledge. I am merely a witness." Such thinking will sometime lead to the awakening of joyful results and through them when the atma is touched, the resulting Veetaraag state leads first to samyakdarshan - Veetarag darshan. The progress of the same state leads to the attainment of complete akashayi form, its experience and its enjoyment - that itself is the complete Veetaraag state. Thus for the demolition of both darshana mohaniya and charitra mohaniya, bodhibija and Veetaraag state are the unfailing means. Here the benevolent Gurudev has stated the unfailing means for removing the passions of mohaniya, where there is no doubt that their application will remove the passions. Here there is no experimentation that says 'try this method out. If you succeed nothing like it, if you don't, come back to me and I shall show you another way'. Brothers! Don't the present day doctors keep experimenting with your body? Take this medicine for three days. It should cure you. If it doesn't then there will be another. And invariably that is what happens. When you go again, he changes the medicine and this happens thrice. The medicine doesn't work and the body is engulfed with pain and it even turns fatal. But here, Gurudev doesn't say so. He has in fact told us the failsafe methods. The medicine is as powerful as the malaise is terrible. The pain has to run away, it just cannot remain. There is no give in this method. In fact, this cure is so perfect that once the Veetaraag state is attained, then the malaise of attachment etc. will never enter the body. It is indeed a dependable solution.

Page #237
I am the Soul 587 Liberation is caused by exactly the opposite of the causes that lead to bondage. If attachment is the unfailing method of inviting bondage, then Veetaraag state is the unfailing method of attaining liberation. To further explain this subject, Gurudev lists the feelings that we experience in our day to day affairs. Let us look at these later.

Page #238
Forgiveness and the like destroy them ... Veetaraag state is the result of the pursuit of the three gems. This state is the natural state of the jiva. If a proper effort is made towards it, the jiva can attain the original state of the self. Veetaraag state is that invaluable device, which removes attachment and aversion which have been misleading the jiva from infinite time. Srimadji has told us about it in the earlier gatha. Now he tells us about the basic effort required for attaining the Veetaraag state. karmabaMdha krodhAdithI, haNe kSamAdika teha; STRATET 3947 H, THT THE .....808 The thoughts of anger, pride, avarice and greed lead to bondage of karma. The opposites of these, i.e. forgiveness, humility, straight-forwardness and contentedness strike down anger etc. This is the experience of all of us. With the arrival of anger, we invariably develop physical, mental and spiritual disturbance. Happiness and joy get destroyed. In fact, the person on whose account we have been angered also gets disturbed. But in any arising circumstance if we remain peaceful and assume a forgiving nature, then everybody is peaceful. It does not attract the bondage of sins - negative karma. With a little understanding and equanimity,jiva can control such surges within the self. Initially with a conscious effort, with what may be specified as pious feelings, the jiva can adopt forgiveness and the like. Later with the awakening of the goal of the atma, with the aim that "Forgiveness and the like are my true nature; remaining in my true natural disposition is my dharma,' the jiva can manifest atma's natural virtue of forgiveness. What is required is merely purushartha - a tremendous effort. In spite of the mohaniya karma being strong, the jiva has several devices to pacify it, to diminish it. Just one device in the

Page #239
I am the Soul 589 form of kshaya is adequate to remove four aghati karmas. Kshaya and kshayopashama are the two devices that are available for four ghati karmas, while for mohaniya there are three devices namely kshaya, kshayopashama and upashama. Therefore, if a jiva embarks on the tremendous effort, it can quickly destroy mohaniya. Earlier the disciple had asked the question- karmo kALa anaMtanAM zAthI FEU FE? - how the karmas piled up over infinite time can be eliminated in such a short human life? This is worthy of deliberation. First of all, the coinciding of atma and karma has been happening since infinite time. Yet not a single karma has a period of infinity. Neither has a single jiva been left without karma. From infinite time until now all the eight karmas, along with infinite karmic pudgala groups, have remained with the jiva. Even today infinite karmas are along with the jiva. We may take this as the unending flow of karmas. The moment the jiva binds karma, the nature, period, sections and area of the karma get decided. These we have discussed earlier. Of them, let us consider here the aspect of period. All eight karmas have different periods. Not just that, if we take the case of mohaniya karma, then the period of mohaniya karma being bound every moment is not the same always. It can range anywhere from a miniscule antaramuhurta to upto 70 Krodakrod sagar years. As time ripens, so do the atoms rise one after the other, provide their result and wear out. They cannot remain even for an extra moment more with the atma than the period assigned to them. The longest period of mohaniya karma is 70 crodacrod sagar years. Hence that is the maximum length of time that it can stay with the atma. After that it has to separate from the atma. Therefore, it is proved that even the mohaniya of the longest

Page #240
590 I am the Soul period cannot bind for infinity. Yet the reason why from infinite time mohaniya was not eliminated totally is that every karma goes on adding to the links of a chain. Since the jiva binds karma at every moment, its flow is unending. But the plus point for us here is that none of the karmas have an infinite period. Therefore, we can end them. Why! When we can break through the feelings of mithyatva, attachment and aversion resulting from karmas in spite of them having an infinite period, we can certainly destroy the karmas which are of a limited period. The other matter that bothered the disciple's mind was that the flow of karmas is from infinite period, and our lifetime is so short, how can so many karmas be broken through within that short period? But it is a matter of simple understanding that the time required to destroy anything is much shorter than the time taken to build it. A large house may take 6-12 months in construction, but it hardly takes few days to demolish it. It takes years for a great tree to grow out of a seed, but a few hours are enough to cut it down. In the same way it does not take infinite time to destroy karmas bound from infinite time. In a very short while, which may be insignificant in comparison with infinite time, karmas can be totally destroyed. We have Bhagawan Mahaveer's past before us. There is a count of his 27 lives. Among them, in how many lives did Prabhu make the tremendous effort for the atma? In just eight of them : 1-3-16-18-22-23-25 and the last i.e. the 27th. He pursued jnana, darshana, charitra and tapa in these eight lives only. If we were to measure the time that was spent in these eight lives, how much would it be? Once the valour (mahaveeratva) awakens in the atma, it does not take long to destroy the coward karmas.

Page #241
I am the Soul 591 Let us understand that a jiva in its wandering through the world traverses through infinite number of pudgals. Yet only when the last pudgal is left to be traversed, does the jiva manifest Samyak darshana. Once Samyak darshana is attained, there may well be many rebirths, yet the time required for attaining moksa for the jiva is determined. A time limit has been fixed. Like a person who was owing Rupees One Lakh and has repaid Rupees 99,999/-; his debt now is only Re. 1/-. He may even incur interest on it, but how long would it take to repay that amount? It is the same with a jiva. When the jiva is equipped in all aspects, when the upadana is ready, it takes only a motivation! When a proper motivation is available, it does not take long for the affected disposition to break. In the gatha it is said : gut kSamAdika teha The dark and dangerous serpent Chandakaushik, who not only had poisonous eyes, but even a rank poisonous self, not only did not allow a man, animal, or tree to remain in his assumed territory but even disallowed birds from flying over it. Whosoever came there had to fall prey to his poison. In spite of being of such a poisonous nature, when he got the best possible motivation in the form of Bhagawan Mahaveer, his anger subsided. He was filled with forgiveness. The serpent was transformed. The proud and vain Indrabhuti Gautam who had gone to demolish the pride of the omniscient supreme soul, Prabhu Mahaveer, himself fell at Prabhu's feet and became supremely humble. Pride was demolished and humility took over. We could look even closer into the past. Into the Jain Shwetamber history - the able sage Acharya Shri Haribhadrasuri, by birth a Brahman, and an expert in Vedas, Puranas, Upanishads, Grammar, Nyaya etc. Such was his knowledge that nobody could ever challenge him. He too firmly believed that there was none other born in this world who could match his

Page #242
592 I am the Soul intellect. In spite of the vanity, there was the ability within, which led him to decide unto himself that he would become the disciple of any person, whose statement of any principle, he did not understand. Once he was passing by a house where several Sadhvis were stationed. An old Sadhvi was studying some scripture. Haribhadra overheard the verse, and stood there. The same gatha was being repeatedly recited and many of its words were similar. He tried to understand them, but could not. He sought permission and went in to see the old Sadhvi who was studying the gathas, and asked, "What are you reciting? Could you repeat it again? Sadhviji repeated the same gatha - cakki duggaM haripaNagaM, paNaMga - cakkINa kezavo cakkI kezava cakkI kezava ducakkI, sI uA cakkI uA / He somehow could not understand what this 'chakki' was all about. In spite of a lot of thinking, he could not understand it. So he said, "O Arya! Could you please tell me the meaning of this gatha?" Sadhviji explained, "In each of the 6 aras, there are 63 Shalaka Purushas. Shalaka is laudable, praiseworthy. Of these, 24 are Tirthankars, 12 Chakravartis, 9 Vasudevas, 9 Prativasudevas and 9 Baladevas. In this gatha, the sequence of the appearance of the Chakravartis and Vasudevas has been told. First 2 Chakravartis and then 5 Vasudevas. Followed by 5 Chakravartis and then 1 Vasudeva. Followed by 1 Chakravarti and then 1 Vasudeva. Followed by 1 Chakravarti and then 1 Vasudeva. Followed by 2 Chakravartis and then 1 Vasudeva. Followed by 1 Chakravarti -.

Page #243
I am the Soul 593 In this sequence, there came 12 Chakravartis and 9 Vasudevas. Chakki means a Chakravarti and Hari / Keshava means Vasudeva. Haribhadrasuri was a scholar of Sanskrit, while this gatha was in Prakrit. As such he could not understand it. But when he did understand, it was his word to his self, of which nobody else was aware, that compelled him to become the disciple of that Sadhviji. He fell at her feet and requested, "O Aryaji! Please accept me as your disciple! It was my vow that I would become a disciple of that person whose words I could not understand". Sadhviji said to him, "O Noble Man! I am a sadhvi. I cannot accept a man as my disciple. You may go to my Guru Acharya Bhagwant who is also stationed here." And Haribhadrasuri went to Acharya Bhagwant and became his disciple. He accepted all the vows of a Jain Sadhu, but he never forgot his first submission at the feet of the Sadhvi and her benevolence. Not just that, the Sadhvi's name was Yakini and in those days Sadhvis were called Mahattaras; after Haribhadrasuri took the diksha, wherever he wrote his name, he wrote it as Yakini Mahattara Sunu - where Sunu means a son. Among the greatest Acharyas from our history, but he never forgot his debt. He did not forget the person who had demolished his ego. He has compiled 1,444 texts and all carry his name as Yakini Mahattara Sunu. Brothers! Be it Chandakaushik Serpent, Indrabhuti Gautam or Haribhadrasuri, their upadana was prepared and with the proper motivation, they could demolish their anger etc. They managed to remove the affected dispositions which were bothering them from infinite time. Therefore, the proverb in our tradition which says that 'Life and nature go together' is a very wrong notion. Many lowly and sinful jivas too have managed to transform their nature. The irritable became forgiving; the egoistic became humble, the extremely violent became the advocates of non-violence, the materialistic became the monument of.

Page #244
594 I am the Soul simplicity. All these have transformed their nature and that is how they could all go across. If life and nature were to go together, no jiva would ever attain moksa. If the affected dispositions like anger etc. were to go along for lives together, then there would be no scope for escape. But that is not so. That is why Srimadji has said that with the awakening of the feelings of forgiveness etc., the kashayas like anger etc. get destroyed. In these gathas, Srimadji has told us what the jiva should do on an experimental basis in the form of a failsafe method of attaining moksa. Now the clarification of the disciple's doubts will follow.

Page #245
The statements in their totality ... Only a jiva whose mind is filled with lofty thoughts is capable of pursuing the three gems. A narrow mind is not suitable for devoted pursuit. Generosity and loftiness open the doors of the inner self. The disciple's mind is confused after listening to people of very bigoted thinking, from various religions-schools-sects who believe in moksa being attainable through rituals. As a result he is unable to come to a conclusion about the truth in the method of moksa. He had placed his doubt before the Gurudev, saying 37491 va asta gull... Clarifying this doubt, Gurudev says - choDI mata darzana taNo, Agraha tema vikalpa; Et urf 317 HIST, 74 TEST 3784 .....fou One has to give up both the insistence and the option that belief in a particular religion or philosophy leads to moksa. Where there is insistence, there is ignorance. A sage is never insistent. Insistence arises out of ignorance. Then it may well be about religion or philosophy. Whether in the field of dharma, society or family, ignorance plays its part. Indeed, a man engulfed within the framework of his own beliefs, and narrow thinking alone would be insistent. He would not be a lover of truth. Whereas a sage would seek the truth alone. "I accept what is true' is the principle of a sage, while 'Accept what I say as the truth' is the principle of an ignorant person. A sage can evaluate a subject, a thing or a situation in several ways. Can measure its various aspects. That is why the great intellectuals and thinkers of the Jain tradition have presented the principle of syadvada. What is this syadvada? It is simply a balanced view of things, far removed from insistence. It can be

Page #246
596 I am the Soul this way, and it can be that way too. Both statements can be true in their contexts. The same statements could be proved false by considering them out of contexts. But where there is a harmonious view taken, there is no scope for insistence or falsehood. That is why Gurudev is telling his disciple that you have heard the principles of several religions and philosophies; now compare them with the principle of syadvad so that their purity-truth becomes tangible. The other suggestion that has been made is to avoid a choice. Attachment and aversion give rise to vikalpa - choice or preferences. Where the attachment and aversion in a jiva begin to diminish, there the state of indifference - nirvikalpa develops. Vikalpas are the reason why there can be attachment towards one religion-sect-community and aversion towards another. That also leads to the belief that this religion is true or false. The jiva measures up a religion by looking at the superficial rituals and vows. And then falls prey to the belief that the rituals acceptable to the community in which he believes are only true, while all others are false. For instance, a Sthanakwasi shravak will tie a piece of cloth across his mouth while performing samayik. A Derawasi - murtipujak temple-goer shravak would hold the same cloth in his hand, while the Digambar would not have the cloth at all. If all three were brought together and asked which one of their practices was true, can you imagine what would be their reply? All of them would insist on their practice to be right and fight the other two. The Sthanakwasi would say, "If someone performs samayik with an uncovered mouth that would be sacrilege, therefore what I do is the right thing, and the other two are wrong.' A derawasi would say, 'The mouth-covering has to be held in the hand during samayik, and if that is not done, then the samayik is futile.' While the digamber fellow would say, 'The mouthcovering is itself an acquisition - parigraha, therefore both these

Page #247
I am the Soul 597 are in the wrong; since I believe in aparigraha - forgoing, I am the true one.' Brothers! Who is right and who is wrong? What is samayik really? The tradition that samayik should have certain equipment is a tradition started by some earlier teachers of that fold. That certainly would have some explanation or certain significance; but it is not as if samayik would be perfect only with it and would be futile in its absence. Samayik is equanimity. A person who can find equanimity after performing samayik, can be said to be doing it properly. A favourable situation should not make him overjoyed nor should an unfavourable situation leave him dejected. If he can manage to attain equanimity without getting perturbed in any situation, then it is a true samayik. Then the equipment may well be endorsed by any fold, they do not make any difference. I do not intend to say that sthanakwasis should stop wearing the mouth-covering or that derawasis should start wearing them. But it is very important to understand the secrets of the various vows and vratas, and deliberate over why and how they should be performed, and to what extent will they transform our lives after performing. One who understands this will not be insistent upon a religion or sect. Srimadji says that if one gives up insistence and preference, and devotedly pursues the path of moksa that has been told, then moksa can be attained in a short while. Earlier too he has said that once mohaniya is won over, moksa is as good as attained. Here too he says the same thing. Darshanamohaniya leads to insistence in a jiva; while charitra mohaniya develops vikalpa - preferences. Once these two are conquered through Bodha - enlightenment and Veetaraag state, there remains no necessity to go through further lives.

Page #248
598 I am the Soul After attaining Samyak darshana, some jiva may attain moksa in the same bhava, while another might do it in the third bhava and yet another might do it in the fifteenth. Their births will remain very few. Therefore, it is necessary to follow the path that has been told. Instead of remaining in the narrow limits of religion-philosophy-community, we should be cultivating such conduct which leads to the diminishing of attachment and aversion. It may well have been told by anybody at anytime. It is not the domain of the followers of any religion or sect that attachment and aversion can be diminished only in their path. Well, it is just this that needs to be done. Gurudev, while explaining to the disciple, says - SaTpadanAM ghaTaprazna teM pUchyAM karI vicAra; a ug-it wafia, Harf frufe ..... 80EUR Gurudev is pleased with the disciple's contemplative nature. O Disciple! You have asked six questions for the six statements after considerable contemplation. I have tried to provide an explanation. It is on account of the spiritual ability within you that you were able to understand all the statements. All these six statements have an inseparable relation with each other. The path to moksa can be damaged by devaluing even one of these six. Properly and discerningly respecting all the six statements after understanding them in totality and in all ways, is the true moksa path. The first statement: the 'soul exists'. If the existence of atma is not accepted, then who is to attain moksa? Who will find the means to attain moksa ? By not accepting the atma, even moksa is missing. The second statement: "Atma is eternal. If the atma were to be considered momentary like the Buddhists do, who would attain moksa? The pursuer of moksa would be momentary and would therefore perish. Then moksa would not be possible. If, like the

Page #249
I am the Soul 599 Sankhyas, the atma were to be considered untouched, then whose sansar would this be? Moksa is there because there is sansar. If atma did not have a sansar, then moksa would not be possible. If, like the Naiyayikas, we believe the atma to be fixed eternally, then it cannot transform into various lives. If it is a human today, it will always remain human, if it is pure now, it will always remain pure. Even then moksa would not be possible. A human cannot end up in the siddha state, likewise, what is already pure does not need to be purified further. So what should be the means for moksa? If the atma is considered to be doing nothing - akarta, and to be suffering nothing - abhokta, then it will not have any bondage of karma. If there is no karma, there is no sansar, and if there is no sansar, there can be no moksa. As a result, the state of moksa cannot be achieved. Moksa exists' : If this statement is not accepted and the very existence of moksa is denied, then jiva will continue to bind karma and suffer karma. If we presume that such a cycle goes on an on, even then the state of moksa cannot be achieved. The last statement : "the means to moksa'. If it is assumed that there are no means, even then moksa becomes unattainable. But if we adopt the syadvada method and accept all the statements, then considering according to the Jain philosophy, we can accept the existence of atma and treat it as sometimes eternal and sometimes momentary. Even if atma is not a karta and bhokta according to niscaya naya, it is a karta and bhokta according to vyavahara naya. Only then can there be any value to the effort of liberating the atma and liberation - moksa. Just as atma is bound, it can also be liberated. That is its moksa. And there is a path to attain that moksa. Thus, by linking all the six statements with the formula of syadvada in our belief, the path to moksa becomes clear. That is

Page #250
600 I am the Soul why Gurudev says, "O Disciple! You decide within yourself that the totality of the six statements is the path to moksa. And understand that the atma has the unparalleled strength to pursue this path to moksa.' More doubts will be clarified later.

Page #251
Caste or attire make no difference The pursuit of the three gems is done with the purpose of attaining an unparalleled and undisturbed state. A jiva with karma gets drawn into various situations. An Emperor, enjoying the reign over six continents and being praised to the skies until yesterday, is born today in hell and suffers from infinite misery - that is karma changing the situation. In the same way, every jiva has been passing through many situations several times. It has not attained one uninterrupted state. But from the very moment it begins to tread the path towards moksa, the stability within the soul begins to advance and the incremental manifestation of the undisturbed state begins. And at the end, it attains the original, eternal, karma-free state. The means to attain the eternal state is itself the path to moksa. The disciple too is eager to attain such a state. That is why he has placed all his doubts before the Gurudev. Gurudev is offering the explanations in a very simple and affectionate way. The last doubt was, kaI jAtimAM mokSa che, kyA veSamA mokSa? "In what caste and attire would there be moksa?' In reply to that, Gurudev says - jAti veSano bheda nahi, kahyo mArga jo hoya; Firet a great , qui te taha.....folg Caste or attire are not required for attaining moksa. It is not as if moksa will occur only if a jiva is born in a noble dynasty or in a particular caste. The devoted pursuit for attaining moksa can be undertaken by anybody. The atma itself has to awaken the dharma of the atma. That which is an atma, can perform the sadhana. Inanimate things cannot perform sadhana. If we were to say this in a colloquial proverb - it would be -

Page #252
602 I am the Soul pALe eno dharma ne bAMdhe enI talavAra dharma belongs to one who observes it, and a sword belongs to one who hangs it from his waist'. So many non-Jain people keep asking, "Can we or can we not adopt the Jain dharma, if we intend to?' Reply is just that, "Jain dharma is a universally applicable dharma'. It venerates merits and not people, for it is the dharma of the atma. If atma adopts the religion of the atma, who can ever raise an objection to it? It is also necessary to know that Jain is not a caste or a dynasty but a dharma. Today, most of the people adopting the Jain dharma are Vaishyas, whereas during the Tirthankar's times even Kshatriyas followed Jain dharma. Even today, there are people from various folds following Jain dharma. No dharma can have a direct relation to a caste, creed or dynasty. Jivas of all castes were ordained at the feet of Bhagawan Mahaveer and have attained moksa. A poet has very beautifully expressed these feelings - koI na UMcuM na koI nIcuM, mahAvIranAM zAsanamAM Ich IT TO A HELI, Auti 3timori .... pALe eno dharma ahIM che, jAta - pAtanA bheda nahIM che cfa sta Teit FIT , PER ATENUHI .... gautama janmyA brAhmaNa kuLamAM, abhayakumAra to kSatriyakULamAM sig fallu aga meita, afirmat .... mANasa moTo dharma thakI che, kuLa nahIM paNa karma thakI che ART Bifchre sanit, Herck PRUHI .... On this path delineated by the Veetaraag, the conqueror of attachment and aversion, there is no discrimination. There is no discrimination of the mighty and the lowly, caste, colour or creed. Anyone who has experienced the true original eternal form of knowledge and atma, after manifesting the bheda-vijnana, is eligible for moksa. Then that person may well be a Brahman

Page #253
I am the Soul 603 like Gautam, a Kshatriya like Abhaykumar, a Vaishya like Jambu or a Chandal like Harikeshi. The label of caste applies to the body. Atma is of no caste. A jiva being born as a human will invariably have to be born into some family. The arrangement of castes and creeds is simply societal. It may even be unavoidable so as to keep the society coherent and organised. Yet this arrangement does not ever become a hindrance to the pursuit of atma. One whose inner sight is awakened goes on to realise the atma, although that one may well be from a so-called lower caste from the viewpoint of a society. The great sages who bring along the noble influences of the previous births, may well be born into any caste or any religion, yet their noble influences do not remain hidden. And they realise the atma. If we were to consider the scriptures, the Prabhu has indicated that Siddhas are of fifteen types - 1. Tirthasiddha - Those who attained moksa after establishing the Tirthankar tirtha, like Gandhar etc. 2. Atirthasiddha - Those who attained moksa before the Tirtha was established - like Marudevi Mata etc. 3. Tirthankar Siddha - Those who attained moksa after attaining the title of Tirthankar, i.e. Rishabhdeva and other Tirthankars. 4. Atirthankar Siddha - Those who attained moksa without attaining the title of Tirthankar, but merely are Kevalis. 5. Pratyekabuddha Siddha - Those who attained moksa upon enlightenment after seeing some matter and following the right conduct on their own, like Karkandu etc.

Page #254
604 I am the Soul 6. Swayambuddha Siddha - Those who attained moksa without the advice of Guru, by realising knowledge through remembering the previous births, like Kapil etc. 7. Buddhabodhi Siddha - Those who attained moksa after listening to the advice of a Guru and developed vairagya. 8. Eka Siddha - Those who attained moksa only one at a time, like Bhagawan Mahaveer. 9. Aneka Siddha - Those who attained moksa in a group of many, like Rishabhdeva and others. 10.Strilinga Siddha - Those who attained moksa in the feminine gender, like Chandanbala and others. 11.Purusha Linga Siddha - Those who attained moksa as males. 12. Napunsaka Linga Siddha - Those who attained moksa in the neuter gender, like Gangeya and others. 13.Grihastha Linga Siddha - Those who attained moksa in the status of householders, like Mata Marudevi and others. 14. Svalinga Siddha - Those who attained moksa in the status of Sadhus, like Jambuswami and several other Munis. 15. Anyalinga Siddha - Those who attained moksa as Yogis, sanyasis and such others in penance, like Valkalchiri and others. Among these fifteen types, the one indicated at the end is the Anyalinga Siddha. It mentions that a sadhaku of a different caste or attire can also attain moksa. It is evident that there is no discrimination of attire. Attire is merely the exterior custom. It is an arrangement to provide a communal identity. But this attire does not bring about any transformation in the human clothed in it. The human remains just the same. In fact, in a society for various activities too, the attire becomes essential.

Page #255
I am the Soul 605 For instance, the city Police - for the work that it does, it is given a uniform. It is not as if this uniform provides any physical or mental strength. But the public abides by what the Policeman says when he is in the uniform. If the same man were to be in civilian dress, nobody would know that this man is a protector. So attire is for an arrangement, for a civilisation, for an identity. Similarly, the body may be clothed in any attire, the external customs may be varying, but if the atma has become purified, then Veetaraag state can certainly be attained. Srimadji has said in the gatha - sAdhe te mukti lahe One who does the sadhana, attains siddhi. Whatever the caste, attire, religion, sect or community, no difference remains anywhere whatsoever. Gurudev has provided a pleasant satisfaction to the doubt that had been nagging the mind of the disciple that only jivas of a certain caste and attire attain moksa, and that others don't. Until now the doubts were cleared. Now Gurudev tries to tell how the inner state of a jiva should be if it is desirous of attaining moksa. The importance is of the inner state. External customs-thinking, attire, caste-dynasty all are insignificant. Therefore, now how should the primary state be, of a jiva desirous of attaining moksa? Srimadji now tells us what sort of feelings a jiva, truly anxious to realise the atma, carries - kaSAyanI upazAMtatA, mAtra mokSa abhilASa; Ha Biar cun, a chaty faith .....806 This gatha, with a small difference, has also appeared earlier in the Atmasiddhi Shastra, which indicates how necessary these virtues are for a jiva desirous of attaining moksa. Here it is reiterated - who is eligible to be on the path to moksa? The first phrase we have just deliberated upon in the previous chapters. A

Page #256
606 I am the Soul jiva who has managed to subdue the kashayas of anger etc. That is to say, in whom the attachment and aversion have become mild. "Having gone beyond all expectations and desires, only the endless feeling of moksa resides in the inner most self, the wandering of the material world appears tiresome; the material pleasures are all futile, only illusions of happiness; It is a happiness that is coming from behind the thin veil of sorrow; Jiva has achieved nothing in spite of enjoying it infinite number of times;' a specific indication of an inquisitive jiva, who is deliberating continuously in many such ways, has been given in this gatha. 'Antar daya' - Shri Prabhu has ordered that there should be compassion for chhakaya jivas. In these chhakayas, the self is the first. Self is the atma. Only the one who can have compassion for the soul, can show compassion for the chhakaya. In other words this may be called svadaya - compassion for the self. So long as the jiva was in a state of attaining eligibility, it was limited to showing compassion to all living beings - pranidaya. But now that the journey has commenced on the path of moksa, the compassion for the self - svadaya or antar daya would have appeared. Such a jiva is extremely conscious of every moment, lest the atma be affected by some passionate feeling - vishaya kashaya. It is cautious every moment, lest the atma be tainted by attachment etc, lest it be pulled down by affected disposition. Such an awakened jiva is in the midst of the tremendous effort that should transform it into the state of natural disposition and as such the feelings of violence and the like begin to step out of its atma's activity. It begins to gradually see the atma in the entire universe. Then neither the defiling of the tendencies within nor the sinful feelings in the external conduct, remain. It does not harm any jiva, and not just that it does not even hurt its feelings. Neither directly nor indirectly would the jiva be responsible for anybody's ill-being. Only the desire for the

Page #257
I am the Soul 607 well-being of the self and all others prevails in the jiva's feelings knowingly or unknowingly. Even when an enemy comes attacking with the intent to kill, the self holds so much peace and equanimity that aggression does not rise even in a single pore. The attacking enemy loses steam altogether. Such situations have been heard of in the lives of many sages, and not once have any of them developed animosity. Guru Nanak was travelling with his disciples, when suddenly one of his opponents came and began abusing him. Guru Nanak was equanimous, peaceful, not offering any confrontation at all. There was no feeling of reaction arising in the mind. The accompanying disciples were surprised. Gurudev, say something! Stop him! Retaliate! But Guru Nanak was unperturbed, and with a smiling face blessed that stranger. This is svadaya, antardaya, bhavadaya. A stream of compassion towards other jivas flows from the self of the jiva in whom svadaya has become the fabric, and that is when this jiva can progress on the path to moksa. Well, the virtues expressed in the gatha are the qualifications of a jiva for eligibility on the path of moksa. If we want to know whether we are eligible to pursue moksa or not, then this is the measure. We have to measure up to it. The self can be adjudged through this gatha and we will know. A sadhaka with this ability can rapidly attain spiritual progress. How this is done will be the subject for a later chapter.

Page #258
The inner search prevails! The pursuit of the three gems, anticipates the presence of proper upadana. Devoted pursuit cannot happen unless and until upadana is ready. In fact, as soon as upadana arises the proper motivation is not far behind. The effort of a jiva is to prepare the upadana and not to gain motivation. The preparation of upadana demands a constant effort. Only when the proper effort of the inner self arises, and happens continuously, does upadana get prepared. In practical life too, when one has to attain some specific ability, how many years of effort goes into it! To become a Doctor, an Advocate or an Engineer, it takes at least 17-18 years of incessant effort! If a child upon passing the matriculation, says, "I have been studying for the last ten years. I do want to achieve some specialisation. But let me take a break for 3 - 4 years; I shall resume soon after', then the child cannot progress. He cannot be given even an year's break. Brothers! For the jiva's upadana to get prepared, a tremendous effort of not just one or two years, but of one or two births is inevitable. Upadana is the specific ability of the jiva. What should be the ability of a jiva pursuing moksa has been told by Srimadji in the Atmasiddhi Shastra. One whose kashayas have been subdued, who has no other desire than attaining moksa, to whom the material world appears filled with sorrow, whose inner self brimming with bhavadaya has become fully compassionate - that atma filled with all these virtues is fully equipped to receive the upadana. Now it is only awaiting a perfect motivation. What happens in the area of the atma of an inquisitive jiva when it becomes eligible for the perfect motivation? Srimadji tells us -

Page #259
I am the Soul te jijJAsu jIvane, thAya sadguru bodha; to pAme samakitane varte aMtara zodha . " 109 The eligibility of an eligible jiva attracts the interaction with a Sadguru. Such a jiva may well be in a city or in a forest, but it keeps getting the guidance. It stops wandering hither and thither. The Sadguru acquaints it with the principle that is the effort of treading the proper path. 609 First of all, that the self is the atma. And the world is inanimate. Atma is the only substance in chaitanya form - animate, the other five substances being jada - inanimate. Both chaitanya and jada transform through their own self transitions. One substance cannot transform itself into another. The chetan transforms within the chetan into chetan itself, in the form of the gunas of knowledge etc. of the self. Jada transforms within jada in the form of the gunas of colour etc. Both substances are totally independent; their abnormal qualities are independent. Chetan cannot do a thing about the transformation taking place in the jada. The Jada cannot do anything in the states occurring in the chetan. Thus, in spite of both substances acquiring and remaining in the same area, they cannot interfere in each other, on account of their being totally independent. Jain Educationa International Having received such a tuition from the Sadguru, the inquisitive sadhaka falls into deep deliberation. He goes into the depths of the own inner self to analyse the sort of thoughts that are prevailing within. 'The transitions occurring in the jada are not my transitions. I am different - independent of all those transitions. I am not in the form of dravya karma, bhava karma or nokarma. Chaitanya, independent of all these three, is my true natural form. I am not in the form of body etc. So the illnesses and troubles occurring in the body are not mine either. I am the pure substance of atma, in the true natural form of intense joy and knowledge. For Personal and Private Use Only.

Page #260
610 I am the Soul Thus with the onset of the realisation of the true natural form of the self, after the deep deliberation over the substance of atma, a devotion - faith arises towards the great benevolent Gurudev, on whose motivation such a thought process began in the sadhaka. An interest develops towards his words. Until now, having been materialistically involved, and having mistaken the transitions in the form of the material world for the transitions in the self, the jiva, which was dwelling in the para, develops an interest like never before, in the preaching of the Sadguru. A great and unflinching devotion develops for the own self. The atma gets filled to the brim with feelings of devotion. In short, vyavahara samyaktva is attained. Such a jiva, brimming with devotion, on one hand begins to alleviate the atma's karma through devotion at the feet of the Sadguru. While on the other hand, delves deep into the own self. He closes the external eyes and opening the eyes of inner self tries to analyse the Self. The jiva is always chained to the external world. It had never shown so much interest in knowing the own self, as it had until now shown in knowing and seeing what was happening outside. . . . But with the peaceful and interesting preaching of the Gurudev filling up the devotion, the sadhaka begins to explore the own inner self. The first fault that is noticed is that until now the own intellect had been involved only in the par. All activity was centred around nourishing the par, without understanding the self. Believing the par to be the self, not for one moment could the jiva move away from the para and as a result it never faced the self. Now that such a great support like the Sadguru has been found, it is time to search the self, settle down in it and experience it. Such an irrepressible supreme thought awakens in the sadhaka and he begins an effort to achieve the experience of the self and taste it.

Page #261
I am the Soul 611 That's it! Now the sadhaka is on his way. Progress has begun. There is no going back. There is no abandoning the path. There is no tiring on the path. With a good speed there has to be a march forward on the path of progress that has begun with an irrepressible enthusiasm and supreme joy. The Sadguru who is instrumental in opening up the path for him is always with him. Therefore, now there is no mistaking, no wandering and the sadhaka is on the path of truth. What wonderful gems such a sadhaka - the inquisitive sadhaka who is serving at the feet of the Sadguru - attains in the light of his spiritual thoughts will be the subject for the next.

Page #262
Pure equanimity comes ... The pursuit of three gems is possible only for that jiva in whom a faith, obedience and interest in and devotion towards the apta purush has awakened. Firstly when faith develops, there also arises an interest in their advice; a thought that, that advice should be followed. If faith were to be absent, then there would be a lack of obedience. The obedience would be only as strong or weak as the faith. If there is a heartfelt faith towards the omniscient Jineshwar Deva, if there is a firm belief that his words are the complete truth, the pursuit of Prabhu's orders becomes very easy. Similarly, if there is unflinching, unwavering faith in the Gurudev, there will be no delay in following his orders. Brothers! It is necessary that we examine our faith. If there is weakness in our faith, then niscaya samyaktva will remain a far cry, we may not even attain vyavahara samyaktva. Only when the deep inside resounds with the assertion towards Dev and Guru that you are the truth - twameva sacchcam', will the panes to the inside open up, the darkness recedes and the flame of samyaktva begins to glow! Here the eligible, perfect and inquisitive sadhaka has the said unwavering faith. From every strand of the inner self, from every pore of his body there is faith oozing out. He has attained vyavahara samyaktva in the form of faith and devotion towards the apta purusha. Therefore, now the Gurudev is guiding such an eligible atma towards the effort required for niscaya samyaktva. Gurudev's inner self is brimming with benevolence towards the disciple. Therefore, he desires that the disciple should attain pure samakit, become an aradhaka, and perform the best aradhana of the ratnatraya. That is why, after first discussing vyavahara samyaktva which will be the cause for niscaya samyaktva, he now explains it. What is niscaya samyaktva?

Page #263
I am the Soul 613 The Arihant Parmatma is forever enjoying the infinite knowledge, infinite darshan, infinite virya and infinite bliss. He is experiencing the fullness of these virtues. To experience these virtues partially is niscaya samyaktva. Partially because a sadhaka's valuable qualities are not manifest completely. When mohaniya karma is totally destroyed, the three ghati karmas also get destroyed with it and that is when the anant chatushtaya - the four infinites - manifest in their totality. That is when the complete bliss of these virtues can be experienced. But the partial manifestation of these virtues is itself niscaya samyaktva. Therefore, in the niscaya samyaktva state, the experience of the virtues is also partial. Getting a part of the experience, which the Jineshwar Prabhu is enjoying, in which he is incessantly engrossed, is itself niscaya samyaktva! Brothers! Experienced sages call a Samyaktvi jiva as the baby of Tirthankar - Laghu Nandan! What a sweet way of calling bheda vijJAna jagyau jinhake ghaTa sItala citta bhayau jima caMdana keli karai sira mAragamaiM jaga mAMhi jinesarake laghunaMdana satya sarUpa sadA jinhakai pragaTyau avadAta mithyAta nikaMdana sAMtadasA tinhako pahicAni karai kara jorI banArasI vaMdana The great poet Banarsidass has saluted such samakit jivas. He says, 'The laghu Nandan - young baby - of the Tirthankar, whose bheda vijnana towards the inner self is awakened, whose self has become as calm and peaceful as sandal, is playing about on the path to moksa -- shivamarga. He has uprooted mithyatva and realised the true form of the self. Seeing their peaceful state, Banarsidass salutes them with folded hands'.

Page #264
614 I am the Soul Even a samyaktvi jiva becomes venerable for the ordinary jivas. For, they are the young children of the Jineshwar. Just as the name of the tree sells a fruit, the jivas who know the glory of the Jineshwar also understand the glory of the samyaktvis. If people take pride in being known as the sons of rich and famous people, then how esteemed they would be to be known as the sons of Jineshwar! Brothers! How rare is the occasion when we can attain such an esteem! Let us make a resolve within, let us awaken a strong interest that we may well not be in a position to undertake the tremendous effort required to attain the total Veetaraag state, but we could certainly attain the samyaktva state that can identify us the young children of the Jineshwar. "Let me make such a tremendous effort in this birth itself that this life shall not be complete without attaining samyaktva.' The benevolent Gurudev, while telling how the Samyaktva state manifests, says - mata darzana Agraha taji, varte sadguru lakSa; TE Vet Hufcha a, lui G 7 .....980 One who does not have the insistence that moksa is possible only through a certain religion or sect, one who subscribes to the truth, can become the aradhaka of the Sadguru's orders. A jiva who holds the insistence of a religion or sect is a kadagrahi, who has been described more than once earlier. There is no dharma in a mata - religion or a pantha - sect. dharma is the true original disposition of the atma and that has to be manifest through the atma itself. Hence, a jiva seeking the truth should not hold on to the beliefs of a religion or a sect, should not insist upon them. The jiva should treat religion and sect as insignificant and be enthusiastic about devotedly pursuing the order of the Sadguru. The jiva should say - abhuThThiomi ArAhaNAe

Page #265
I am the Soul 615 I am here to do the aradhana, I am all set. That is how this jiva is dedicated at the feet of the Sadguru with pious feelings. It devotedly follows the orders of the Sadguru with all the three yogas of mind, speech and body. It knows the greatness of the Sadguru. The Sadguru himself would be constantly engrossed in the atma. The affection for external thoughts - parabhavas - has long been left behind, now he is enjoying the unparalleled ecstasy of self-realisation. Only the one who can experience it can offer it to others. In the inner self of the inquisitive sadhaka, the image of the satpurush is clear. He knows that - satpuruSa te ja ke jehano Atmopayoga ja aTala cha, anubhava pradhAna ja vacana jenu, zAstra-zrutie paTala che; aMtaraMga icchA rahita jenI gupta AcaraNA sadA, fren-agfa TM-34PIATT 7 He-g:0 241.... The true original disposition of the atma is upayoga. The upayoga of a satpurush is within the atma itself. He may well have to perform some other external activity, yet the realisation of 'I am the soul is resolute in him. The realisation of an independence from external feelings is not momentary but is prevalent constantly. Since he is enjoying the bliss of selfrealisation, the words that emanate from him are steeped in experience. Merely having learnt the words from scriptures by heart, will not do. Indeed, such sages may well not have practically read many scriptures, but the words that emanate from them are so sincere that the scriptures have nothing different to say. Not just that, several matters of self-realisation may not even be found in the scriptures. Such matters can be found with them or can be seen in their own lives. Indeed, beyond all desires or expectations, with but a feeling of selflessness, the conduct of the life goes on along with the pure feelings of the inner self, without conceit or show-off. Such sages are so straightforward and innocent that they may not believe in putting up a show of the customs approved by the

Page #266
616 I am the Soul society, but their activity naturally becomes such, where the purity of the inner self is maintained and enhanced. And therefore, they do not even bother to think whether the society will praise or denigrate their way of life. Even in this age, in our country there are such sages, in farflung places, in isolation, in unpopulated forests, performing their secret sadhana, and the world doesn't even know about them. The sages do not even expect anybody to know about them. Recently in Maharashtra, there was such a sage who left the body some 3-4 years ago. He had not really taken on the life of a sanyasin outwardly. He was a householder. After completing his duties towards this life, he left his residence and came away far to a riverbank. There was a small room meant probably as a pump house. It was not in use. He took somebody's permission and went in and sat down. He never came out. There was but one cloth on his body. After considerable time, when one person came to know about this, began to visit this place. He managed to convince this sage with great effort to accept a glass of milk everyday, and he began to bring it himself. The room used to be closed from outside. This man would bring milk and open it then. He would leave the milk there and close the room again. He would return only the next day to find that sometimes the milk had not been taken at all. Thus the sage used to be immersed in the penance of the atma for hours and sometimes days together. He was unaware of the time that passed; neither hunger nor sorrow ever bothered him. For some time the room was infested by mosquitoes. There were so many mosquitoes that they swamped his body. The body was not seen at all. Like the honeycomb, where the bees live. But the sage was unperturbed. He did not even realise it. Once this problem reduced, there was the problem of the mice. All day long, in that little room there used to be at least 25-30 mice, even going up and down the sage's body. But the sage was

Page #267
I am the Soul 617 unmoving like a stone image. Why! The mice used to drink up the milk. Yet the sage was unaware. He had no feeling of resistance in the face of torture and trouble. Such a sage was living in Maharashtra till recently. But more than 4 - 6 people did not know him. He was not even bothered that anybody should know him, salute him or pray to him. Brothers! This is secret practice - secret sadhana. He did not even have the desire to let anybody know that he was a sadhaka. There are many who while being householders or as tyagis who perform excellent sadhana. Nobody knows that they exist. Whose thoughts are the very best in physical service and spiritual pursuit? In people's view merely their service comes to be noticed, but nobody knows how deep these sages have really gone into the atma, or that they have gone into the endless depths of the atma and measured them. Outwardly they appear to be in vyavahar - activity, but inwardly they are in the atma. Brothers! I shall mention my own experience. My great benevolent Guruniji Pujya Bapji, for whom I have the greatest respect, is also one such anatarang sadhaka. Outwardly she appears to be engrossed in interaction with the society, in her duties towards the disciples, in discourses and the like. But while in all these activities, her self is engrossed in the feeling of the atma. Her equanimity and tolerance are boundless. Today for over 32-33 years there has been the rise of ashata Vedaniya karma in her body in varying degrees. Yet she has never expressed agony or agitation. She is neither engrossed with her body nor her disciples. Just rapt in self-trance, beyond all expectations. She had few opportunities of study and teaching, yet when the nectar like words from her take the form of a discourse, they strike a chord deep inside us. For every thought that emanates from her self-experience is so mysterious yet so simple and clear that it directly touches our alma. Brothers! Even you would have experienced how touching the thoughts which fill her discourses

Page #268
618 I am the Soul are. Her self-experience is supreme but the practice is concealed, which ordinary people cannot understand. So this is how the satpurushas practice. And that is why they are beyond all mental happiness or sorrow, peace or disturbance. If the disciple follows the orders of such Sadguru with an unwavering faith, then there is no doubt that he will attain the state of pure samakit. When there is a deliberation over the Sadguru's preaching and his orders, with an appropriate feeling of faith, the attraction for external substances - paradravya - begins to decline. As the deliberation over the self increases, the deliberation of the par reduces. Ultimately, when the bheda vijnana of atma-body appears, the tendency of wandering outside begins to stabilise on the inner self. Then it does not have any necessity to go out at all. The treasure of unimagined, secret powers lying within, holds the activities within the self. Where there is a perception of the self, the atma becomes engrossed in that experience. Well, that is niscaya samyaktva. Such samyaktva is one and unbroken. There are neither types nor any parts in it. All the types of samyaktva that have been told are from the vyavahar point of view. For academic interest, the types of samyaktva mentioned are - 1. Adjna samyaktva, 2. Marga samyaktva, 3. Upadesha samyaktva, 4. Sutra samyaktva, 5. Beeja samyaktva, 6. Sankshepa samyaktva, 7. Vistar samyaktva, and 8. Artha samyaktva. These eight samyaktvas have been mentioned according to their genesis. Samyaktva can occur on account of any reason, but these are all the types mentioned according to vyavahar. The other two types that have been mentioned are, 1. Avagadha samyaktva and 2. Paramavagadha samyaktva. Avagadha samyaktva means Kshayika samyaktva. Kshayika samyaktva is that which occurs at the fourth gunasthana in the

Page #269
I am the Soul 619 form of the total elimination of seven prakritis. This prevails from the fourth up to the twelfth gunasthana. Param Avagadha samyaktva also means Kshayika samyaktva, but that occurs to a jiva which is in the thirteenth gunasthana. There even jnana, darshana and virya would have occurred in the infinite form. But the experience of the kshayika samakit of fourth to twelfth gunasthanas and that in the thirteenth gunasthana is the same. There is no difference in it. That is why Srimadji has said that jemAM bheda na pakSa There are no differences or parts. An eligible sadhaka devotedly pursues the Sadguru's order in its totality and attains such pure samyaktva. In this the jiva experiences the four anantas, partially. It enjoys the bliss of being engrossed in the true original form of the atma. It gets rapt in the experience of the self. It remains engrossed in the state of experience of sensing the self. The jiva is moving on the path of progress. It is climbing one step after another. Now which is the next step? - we shall learn shortly.

Page #270
Experience, attention and awareness! The pursuit of the three gems takes us to the depths of selfexperience. The more the stability in the atma, the deeper is the experience. And as the depth of experience increases, so does the stability in the atma. Both are inseparable. It is the same with the experiences of happiness and sorrow that happen on the platform of the mind. Whichever experience has been more touching to our heart, whether happy or sad, remains for a long period on our memory. Why! Some experiences are remembered right through the life and do not get wiped from the mind at all. But when some experience is superficial, which does not reach us within; it is experienced one day and forgotten on the next. It is the same with the experience of the atma. The deep experience in the form of kshayika samakit can never be wiped out. It remains with the jiva forever. Even when the jiva attains moksa, it takes this along. But if the tendency of the darshana mohaniya is merely suppressed, that is if only upashama has been attained, then it remains just for a moment and then this state of experiencing the atma is forgotten. No doubt, Upashama samakit enables the experience of atma but it does not have the depth and stability of kshayik samakit. Why! Even to understand the principles that are meant for the intellect, it is necessary to have a depth and stability in the intellect. Only intelligent people can understand the secrets of the inanimate world. Not all can manage it. Even in spite of a great effort, a man of limited intelligence cannot understand the inanimate principles. And the stability that it demands! Today scientists have unravelled the mysteries of the inanimate and placed them before the world. How stable and persevering have they been! Only when they forget the entire world and get engrossed in their experiments can such intelligent people attain

Page #271
I am the Soul 621 such secrets. So, Brothers! Depth and stability are necessary even for experiencing the secrets of spiritual world. Here, after taking the disciple on a tour from vyavahar samyaktva to niscaya samyaktva, Srimadji now tells us about how the state of the sadhaka who has once tasted the deep experience, will be - af fast ayran, 3474a, wat, tita; are a F rani, turche .....888 Sadhaka has attained bheda vijnana. He has personally experienced the different identities of the body and atma, like the clothes and the body. He has had and interview with the self. The manifestation of the state of true form of the self was in a flash, but the later there has been an incessant flow too. Yet the Samyak darshani jiva is still in the material world. It has not become totally free from karma. Therefore, it is bound to be suffering from the problems generating from karmas. In fact, even when the state of his inner self is splashed with the colours of self-experience, the self is forced to get involved with other activities. Here, the state of the self - atma dasha, chitta dasha - that prevails in various practical situations has been told in a very simple and straightforward way. All the gathas of Atmasiddhi Shastra are unparalleled. Yet the picture of the state of a samyaktvi jiva that has been presented in this gatha is simply marvellous. One who understands this gatha properly does not have to go to anybody to find out what the state of his self is. It first says that the experience of the own true disposition prevails. When? When the samyaktvi jiva is on the verge of retiring. When there is no other work and there is only retirement, at such times the entire attention is devoted to experiencing the true disposition of the atma. It goes deep into the own atma and the self is not involved anywhere else. The self begins to plunder

Page #272
622 I am the Soul joy from within the self. It has no state other than the state of self experience. Ordinarily man tries to seek out devices of entertainment while retiring. He tries to find ways of passing time. Man has never learnt to find happiness without some device or apparatus. If nothing is available he takes recourse to delving into thoughts of remembering the past or imagining the future. He spends hours together in such thoughts, but cannot go into the self for even a moment. He cannot derive the experience of the atma from the self. How can one who has never experienced the joy of the atma, ever find joy in the state of retirement? Here it is the matter of a sadhaka with samakit who has already experienced the joy of the self, for his complete inner state is now detached from the entire material world and engrossed in the own atma. Once the deep experience of the own atma is realised, then there is an insatiable thirst for tasting it again and again. That is why that jiva yearns to secure the moments of retirement, which would take it beyond the sansar. The moment retirement is secured; the flow of its application begins to abound in the experience of the true original disposition. Thus in the inner self of such sadhaka, the anubhava dhara in nivrutti dasha (the flow of experience in the state of retirement) abounds. For a jiva in the material world, there are very few moments of retirement available. Since there are labels such as body etc, the jiva has to get involved in their activities. When a samakiti jiva is involved with the activities of the body etc., its attention remains in the true original disposition of the self. It certainly knows that the bodily and other activities are not its own; they are not my duties. I am but the bodiless atma. I am a substance beyond the senses. There is no place for such activities in the true disposition of the atma. But this atma is possessing a body. That is why the activities of the body need to be done. But that is

Page #273
I am the Soul 623 not my goal. My goal is but my atma and nothing else.' Such a state gradually reduces the affinity towards body etc. It subdues attachment and aversion. That is why although from the view of the world, the jnani or the samakiti jiva appears to be enjoying the passions of the five senses, it is detached from them and its goal is the own atma. Therefore, in spite of enjoying the passions, it is not bound by karma. Not just that! If in spite of being samyaktvi, he is a king, an emperor, he has to reign the kingdom, complete all his duties towards the subjects; and if some other king brings a war upon him, he would even have to go to the battlefield. He would wage the war, but there would be no desire to acquire a kingdom. He is fully aware in his atma that waging war is not my work. If the opponent did not want a war, then he does not want it either - he is thus prepared. He has no interest in waging war. He merely goes to the war as a duty-bound king. Inwardly he is different. That is why the lakshya dhara in the pravritti state (the flow of attention in the state of activity) abounds. The third dhara - flow - is the Pratiti dhara. Even though one may be a samakiti, he still has to face the rise of all the eight karmas. With the rise of the darshanavaraniya, one feels sleepy. It is necessary to sleep. The samakiti does sleep, but he does not sleep sound, not like Kumbhakarna. He is alert even in the sleep. Not that he is awake, but even in the sleep he is aware of the true disposition of the self. Even in that state he is aware that "I am the soul. If he is awakened even from deep sleep and asked "Who are you', he would reply 'I am the soul. Just as we are always aware of our name; even when somebody calls us while we are asleep, we get up and respond to the call. Our name is so dear to us, and in spite of the fact that the period of the name is not very long, its prevalence is very evident. The name is only as old as we are, it cannot be older. Yet the acquaintance with the name is more, as if we have been hearing it from several births before.

Page #274
624 I am the Soul For a samakiti jiva, the awareness of the own atma is more than the name of the body; for the atma has no name, it has no age. It is just the self. The awareness of the self is always there for the self. It should be there. The jiva is lost in wandering and therefore is not aware that 'I am the soul'. But the samakiti has come out of the wandering. It has already deeply experienced the atma. It has realised the self. That is why, even in the state of sleep it has the awareness of the true original disposition of the atma. Atma is never forgotten. That is why the pratiti dhara in sushupta state (the flow of awareness in the state of slumber) abounds. Thus, whatever the state a samakiti atma may be in, while in the life's activities, it never forgets the self - the atma. Experience, attention and awareness always remain. Sages have said - nivRtti dazAmAM anubhavadhArA! pravRtti dazAmAM lakSadhArA! suSupta dazAmAM pratItidhArA! The involvement of such a jiva is never in the external. That is why it is said in the gatha - vRtti vahe nijabhAvamAM paramArthe samakita The involvement of this jiva flows only in the thoughts of the atma, in the own inner self. And that state is itself the ultimate samakit state. The great poet Banarasidass has expressed the same sentiments - svAratha ke sAce paramArthake sAce citta, sAce sAce baina kahai sAce jainamati hai; kAhU ke viruddha nAhi parajAya buddhi nAhI, Atama gaveSI na gRhastha hai na jati hai; siddhi riddhi vRddhi dIsai ghaTameM pragaTa sadA, aMtara kI lacchisau ajAcI lacchayati hai;

Page #275
I am the Soul 625 dAsa bhagavanta ke udAsa rahaiM jagata sau, gforen a ph vita hufahrn .... One who has developed the yearning for attaining the atma, whose mind is engrossed in attaining the ultimate, who is the devotee of truth and a true follower of the Jineshwar, who lives without the thought of opposing anybody, who does not look for options - paryaya buddhi, who in spite of not being a deshavirati shravak or a sarvavirati Sadhu always lives in atmagaveshna, whose prowess of the atma is increasing, who is rich with atmalakshmi, who is detached from the world and who is serving at the feet of the Jineshwar - such a samakiti jiva alone is always happy. Such a samakiti jiva attains parmartha. In fact, its state goes on progressing and it overcomes the savikalpaka state to attain nirvikalpa state and stabilises in it. In this gatha Srimadji has described the supreme state of a samakiti jiva. This is the state that has importance on the path of moksa. One who has already achieved this state, will always find the right path. He can never take the wrong path. Since the state - dasha - was attained, a direction - disha - was found. Where the progressive step taken in this state, goes and rests will be detailed later.

Page #276
When conduct rises ... The pursuit of the three gems enables the continuance of the state of self experience. Once the atma has been experienced, the jiva continues to remain in the thoughts of devotion and that itself is the continuity of the state of experience. In various situations in life, the experience, attention and awareness of the own natural disposition, that a samakiti jiva has, along with the purification of samakit, are strong reasons for progress. While telling us how quickly such ajiva progresses, Srimadji says - vardhamAna samakita thaI, TALe mithyAbhAsa; JG4 gru afant, aitarem u RH .....888 The progressive state of samakit means the increasing purity of the experience of the atma. In a jiva in samakit state, infinite karmas keep getting wiped out from time to time. Impurity declines and purity continues to increase. Even charitra mohaniya karma undergoes nirjara. As a result attachment and aversion are subjugated. This subjugation avoids the mithya feelings that reside in a jiva. Here the question arises that we are talking of a state wherein mithyatva is gone and samakit has been attained, then what is this mithya feeling again? All the feelings under mohaniya are mithya feelings. When samakit occurs, of the 28 characteristics under mohaniya, only seven are eliminated. There are 21 more - anger etc., and the nine nokashayas. Of these, the increasing purity of samyaktva first diminishes the four apratyakhyani and pratyakhyani kashayas. These characteristics are detrimental to charitra in the form of deshavirati and sarvavirati. As these characteristics diminish, charitra rises.

Page #277
I am the Soul Here it is necessary to understand the rise of charitra. Normally, it is karmas which rise. Charitra is not a karma. Then how can it rise - uday? The meaning of uday is to appear. Just as in the morning in the eastern sky there occurs the suryodaya. We say everyday that surya uday has occurred. What does this mean? It is not as if for some reason a new sun has appeared. But that it was out of the reach of our sight, it had gone below and now it has come up. As it climbs in our eyes, it rises in the sky. How did it come? Its movement is constant. Therefore it has come up. In the same way it also sets. The Moon, stars and others also go through this rise and setting. That is to say, when they appeared after disappearing it was their uday (rise) and when they disappear after appearing it was their asta (setting). Charitra is not the fruit of any rising karma. Therefore, our usage of the term uday of charitra has to be understood in terms of the usage for the sunrise - that the charitra, which was hitherto unseen, has now appeared. But while for the sun to rise, its own movement is responsible, in the case of the rise of charitra, the purity of the state of atma is responsible. The increasing purity of the true form of the atma makes charitra appear. All mithya feelings disappear. 627 Even the mithya feelings in the form of nokashayas, ratiarati, joy-sorrow, fear, jugupsa also begin to decline. A samakiti, a jiva with charitra, does not have as many gama-anagama feelings in the passions of the senses as there are in a jiva attached to the material world. Of course, since his nokashayas are not yet fully destroyed, there still are notions of choices in his life. Certain things are liked, while certain others are disliked, yet there is no yearning for them, there is no insistence. Momentary feelings do appear, yet the jiva immediately turns away from them; it does not remain wallowing in them. Same applies to the feelings of joy and sorrow, fear and jugupsa - upon motivation they affect for a moment, but do not last long.

Page #278
628 I am the Soul The brilliant Sumati, follower of the Jineshwar, who placed unwavering faith at the feet of the Veetaraag, was a devoted pursuer of the samyaktva bhava. Her mind was engaged in the purity of the atma. She had total faith in the words of the Prabhu. Along with faith there was a harmony of practice. Such was this Shravika whose husband was away when her two grown up sons, like two gems of the eyes, suddenly died. Sumati was dumbstruck for a moment. It appeared as if the face of her entire life had been distorted. But the profoundly faithful lady who had prayed at the feet of the Veetaraag, stabilised within a few moments. She kept the bodies of her sons in a room and covered them with white linen, and waited at the door for her husband. After considerable time her husband arrived. He found the lady unusually sad. He wondered what had happened, why his wife was so sad? He asked - "Sumati! What happened? Why are you sad?" "Nothing, O Dev! I had a fight with our neighbour." "What! Sumati, you are saying this! I have never heard you even raise your voice. How can you every fight?" "O Nath! Some time back, I had borrowed a pair of gemstudded bangles from our neighbour for a particular occasion. I liked them very much and retained them. Today the neighbour had come for them, but I did not want to return them. That was why we fought." "Oh! Madwoman! Is there a fight in this? If somebody comes asking for their stuff, you have to return it, don't you? How long can you retain others' stuff? Go return it!" "No! I don't like to return them, I want to retain the bangles. I like them a lot! What if I don't return?" "What's wrong with you today? How come you are talking this way like never before?"

Page #279
I am the Soul 629 "O Swami! Can't we really keep others' stuff? Do we have to return it to the owners?" "Yes, of course! No questioning that!" "But then won't you feel sorry? You won't feel hurt if I returned them?" "Oh no! What is there to be sorry about? Our work is done, the time is up, so it has to be returned!" "Is that so? Then come, I shall show you our gem-studded bangles." Sumati pulled her husband by his hand into the other room, where their two sons were lying in eternal sleep. She removed the sheet from their faces and quietly told her husband, "Look Nath! These are our gem-studded bangles. Their time is up and they have gone!" The husband was speechless. Can this woman evaluate the death of her sons in this way? Can a mother's heart show such equanimity? What strength can this be? Sumati's husband immediately fell at her feet, and said : "Sumati! You have truly practised at the feet of the Veetaraag. Only your unwavering devotion towards the Veetaraag state of the Veetaraag has given you the strength to bear such a great shock!" Brothers! This is the state beyond joy or sorrow. Every pore of the samakiti jiva is filled with faith in the Veetaraag state. That is why even in such terrible situation it can maintain equanimity. That is why it has been said here that it eliminates all mithya feelings and when mithya feelings get eliminated the characteristics of charitra mohaniya karma begin to fade out one by one. As the charitra mohaniya begins to weaken, the stability within the atma begins to rise. Remaining engrossed in the true form of the atma, is itself Bhava charitra. Where bhava

Page #280
630 I am the Soul charitra appears, dravya charitra inevitably follows. The thoughts of avrata and pramada step down from the nature, and that is when charitra appears, in the never before state of stability in the atma in the form of the apramatta state. This is the situation of the jiva in the seventh gunasthana. Now only the sanjwalan kashayas are left. But these are very mild. As such they do not come too much in the way of the jiva's progress. In the progressive state after the seventh gunasthana, the jiva can diminish these too. Srimadji has described that state, which is there just before that - ema parAjaya karIne cAritramohano, AvuM tyAM jyAM karaNa apUrva bhAvajo, zreNI kSapakataNI karIne ArUDhatA, ananya ciMtana atizaya zuddha svabhAva jo .... apUrva . The situation of the seventh apramatta gunasthana is there for a mere antarmuhurta. But invariably the jiva cannot remain there for that entire antarmuhurta. There is a pramada and the jiva returns to the sixth gunasthana. There it remains for a long time. Again there is a rise in the feelings and the seventh gunasthana is attained. The jiva remains there for a few seconds or perhaps a few minutes. But when the consequent state of the jiva begins to turn very pure, when this purity begins to increase, the jiva proceeds further. And if this state continues for two ghadis (48 minutes) i.e. for the complete extent of an antarmuhurta, the jiva manages to achieve kevaljnana at the end of it. In other words, within this period it makes a tremendous effort. As a result Veetaraag state appears. Here, Srimadji too says that once charitra mohaniya is overcome, and the jiva remains for two ghadis in the stable situation of being engrossed in the original form of the atma, the jiva manages to attain the eighth gunasthana, where hitherto dormant bhavas which are responsible for manifesting the charitra, arise. This is called apurvakaran..

Page #281
I am the Soul 631 From this point, the jiva begins the rasaghata and stithighata of karmas. That is, it goes on reducing the intensity of the karmas bonded earlier, it reduces the peak state of the karmas. The jiva makes the maximum effort in this gunasthana. Just as an aeroplane needs extra strength while taking off, and not so much after it rises and flies on, the jiva too reaches the Veetaraag state in a short while after once reaching the kshapaka grade. This state is permanent. The effective consequent state of this gunasthana is unparalleled and its purity is wonderful. That's it! Then there is only a short way to go. The jiva comes to the ninth-tenth gunasthana. In the ninth gunasthana, it diminishes the characteristics of charitra mohaniya in the form of nokashayas and the sanjwalan kashayas - anger, pride and maya. The state of the tenth gunasthana is very short, where just one sanjwalan lobha - avarice is diminished and then the jiva straightaway reaches the twelfth gunasthana. That is a stay in the Veetaraag state. To attain such Veetaraag state, there has to be a war, with mohaniya alone. Mohaniya is strong, and so is the strength that resides within the jiva. But unless the strengths of the atma are awakened, mohaniya cannot be diminished. If our strength is more than the opponent, only then we can fight, otherwise we have to suffer silently. But the jiva has infinite strength, which when awakened can liquidate mohaniya however strong it may be and it quietly goes away. A youth was passing by a house when suddenly a brick fell from the top and he was hurt a little in the leg. Young as he was, full of beans, he got very angry. 'Who threw this brick? I shall go and bang it on his head,' so saying he picked up the brick and ran up the stairs. He was about to throw the brick when he noticed that it was a wrestler doing his sit-ups on the terrace. The wrestler's push had dislodged a brick which had fallen down.

Page #282
632 I am the Soul The youth developed cold feet. He spoke to the wrestler, "Aha! Its you! Your brick had fallen down, so I came up to return it. If there is anything I can do for you, please let me know. I live close by." And he quietly slipped away. Brothers! Did you see? How he quivered when he saw the wrestler! He had come to bash up but went away after buttering up. Well, let us also awaken the anantavirya of our atma, and become wrestlers. Then even the strong mohaniya would not have the guts to wag its tail before us. It will have to run away. And our Veetaraag state will arise. Thus the devoted practice of samyag darshan leads the jiva on to Veetaraag state, which is the ultimate and topmost attainment for a jiva. In what feelings the atma, in the Veetaraag state, is engrossed, will be taken up later ...

Page #283
Only the own natural disposition ... The highest point of the devoted pursuit of these three gems, is Veetaraag state. With the appearance of the Veetarag state, the jiva becomes grateful. There remains no duty to perform. The battle is won, once the jiva, who is lost in the (bhava) ocean, reaches the shore with the help of the torch light - moha svayaMbhUramaNa samudra tarI karI, sthiti tyAM jyAM kSINamoha guNasthAna jo; aMta samaya tyAM pUrNa svarUpa vItarAga thaI, reig ft closind FATA UT .... Brya cAra karma ghanaghAtI te vyavaccheda jyAM, bhavanAM bIja taNo AtyAMtika nAza jo; sarva bhAva jJAtA dRSTA saha zuddhatA god former og atf aria Tablet ....370 Mohaniya has been given the simile of the largest self-made and indulgent ocean. Moha - avarice is a vast ocean. Yet it can be crossed over with proper equipment. That is jiva's good fortune. Just as on the great oceans, one can travel miles upon miles and go to distant places in a vessel, so also the ocean of moha, however vast it may be, can be crossed over with the equipment in the form of human birth. When a jiva crosses over this ocean and lands at the other end of it, its state is wonderful and fantastic. What could never be found in the infinite wandering in the births, that state is attained upon crossing over. This state of the jiva has been called ksheenamoha gunasthana. Once the jiva has reached this point after totally uprooting mohaniya, it has won! Now there is no going back. No more births are necessary. Soon as the jiva reaches the twelfth gunasthana, it stabilises in a totally Veetaraag state and this stability at once removes the three karmas - jnanavarniya, darshanavarniya and antaraya. And then the infinite strengths

Page #284
634 I am the Soul of kevaljnana, kevaldarshana and anantavirya, lying within the atma, appear. The four ghati karmas which come in the way of attaining this state are totally destroyed. Prior to this there occasionally used to be upashama or kshayopashama, then again a rise in them. Sometimes, ajnana and the like used to be pointed out, but that changes now. Attachment and aversion, which happen to be the seeds of infinite wandering in the sansar, are totally destroyed. Now there are no more rebirths. The natural jnata - drashta quality of the jiva has blossomed to the fullest extent and the Lord Atma is extremely gratified. Now, there is only the enjoyment of the infinite bliss. In this state four ghati karmas were destroyed. Aghati karmas still remain. But they have no influence. They are like a burnt out rope - the twists of the yarn are still visible, but there is no strength in it. Likewise, the aghati karmas are still with the jiva, but they do not come in the way of its ecstasy of self-realisation. Now let us try to understand the kevaljnana that is manifest. What is it? Normally people equate kevaljnana with complete knowledge; that is the knowledge in which reflect all the thoughts of the three lokas in the three kalas - past, present and future. - Well, that's good enough, this could also be the meaning. But we should not be restraining an energy like kevaljnana in just these limits. This meaning is meant for the common man, who cannot fathom the deep thoughts. The original disposition of jnana is to know the substances that are jneya - worthy of knowing. As a result, a kevaljnani supreme soul knows the entire world, but it does not aspire to know. Kevaljnana is like a mirror. The mirror does not desire, yet the substances that come in front of it do get reflected in it. The images do not affect the mirror. It is the natural disposition of the mirror to reflect the image of a.

Page #285
I am the Soul 635 substance. Therefore, it happens. Similarly, even in kevaljnana, all the dravya-paryayas of the world get reflected, yet the atma is not concerned. It does not want to see. It is only engrossed in its own brilliance. It is like switching on a light in a room for picking up a thing. It simultaneously lights up hundred other things in the room and they become visible. Atma's tremendous effort is only towards attaining the complete realisation of the own true form, and kevaljnana is incidentally attained in this direction. But in the kevaljnana, just as the atma is visible, all other things also become visible. The kevali supreme soul has no concern for them. The other meaning of kevaljnana is but one knowledge. Where there is but one knowledge that is kevaljnana. The Shastras do mention mati, shruta, avadhi, manahparyava and keval as the five jnanas. But the other four get merged with kevaljnana. They do retain a separate identity. Kevaljnana is above all and complete. Other jnanas are incomplete, so they do not remain separate from kevaljnana. If your son has qualified as an M.Sc., you do not go about saying, "My son has done his matriculation, then his B.Sc. and now his M.Sc.', for when M.Sc. is mentioned, all the others are implied. It is evident that only after qualifying in all these, the boy would have reached the M.Sc., not otherwise. Likewise, in kevaljnana, the other four jnanas are absorbed. The first meaning was from the practical view. But what does the kevali parmatma gain from it? He does not get anything from looking at the world. The common people might perhaps seek joy out of looking and knowing the world. They may even be able to gain some material benefit from it. But the kevali parmatma does not want anything out of this. That is why Srimadji now presents the specific definition of kevaljnana -

Page #286
636 I am the Soul kevaLa nija svabhAva-, akhaMDa varte jJAna; onfeng aloogiat a, da ni fratur .....883 The state in which atma and knowledge - jnana prevail without a difference - atma itself is jnana and jnana itself is atma. Atma is merely a mass of knowledge, nothing else. Only knowledge - just jnana! The natural disposition of the jiva is jnana and the eternity of that jnana is kevaljnana. It is just the jnana of the true natural disposition of the self, not of anything else. There is nothing else but the natural disposition - svabhava in the entire world. Just svabhava and svabhava - the entire world gets immersed in it. There is also knowledge of the svabhava, nothing else. Nothing else, but knowledge. And the jnana too is constant, there is no interruption, no break, no disturbance - just plain and constant and natural jnana. In the tremendous effort until now, the jiva would have awakened the true natural disposition of the self considerably. But it was not constant, not uninterrupted. In the altering states of the gunasthanas, the consciousness of the self-experience would also be altering and as such the experience of the state of natural disposition would not be unbroken and even. In fact, until the jiva reaches the twelfth gunasthana, there is a lot of climbing and falling in the states, as a result the experience is not constant then. Likewise, in the previous gunasthanas, there would be several upward transitions in a short while, within one gunasthana, several downward transitions in another and various transitions through various gunasthanas. However, once the thirteenth gunasthana is attained as a result of kevaljnana, then that state, and the fourteenth ayogi state and the siddha state, all have the same effect, there are no differences. There is only the experience of the natural disposition. As a result the experience of kevaljnana is constant. Thus where the jiva's constant state of jnana prevails, it is kevaljnana. Such a kevaljnani atma still has a body. In spite of

Page #287
I am the Soul 637 - having the three yogas of mind, speech and body, it has attained the point of liberation, forever free from births. The antardasha of the Siddha and the kevali parmatmas do not differ in any way. That is why the kevali parmatma experiences the state beyond the body in spite of having a body. The yearning for the body has ceased much earlier. Therefore, body does not come in the way of constant knowledge. The jiva has to attain kevaljnana through the effort on the path of moksa. The Gurudev has shown the path to the disciple. He has shown the steps of devoted pursuit from beginning to end, and also told how the atma gets transformed into the supremely pure state. Srimadji has presented here a marvellous gatha with a marvellous meaning. This gatha is also very important, as it is replete with mystery. How can we unravel this mystery with our limited intellect? Such secrets reflect only in the knowledge of the sages, yet - alpazrutaM zrutavatAM parahAsadhAma tvadbhaktireva mukharIkurute balAnmAm / yatkokilaH kila madhau madhuraM virauti taccAru cAmara kalikA nikaraika hetuH / / As Manatungacharya says while praising Lord Adinatha, O Lord! In the presence of the learned ones, my knowledge is fit to be laughed at. Yet my devotion towards you forces me to speak. I feel obliged to sing your praises. Therefore, I cannot remain without speaking out. Just as in summer when the mangroves are in full bloom, the tiny little black Nightingale fills the mangroves with its tweets. It just cannot help it, it is not bothered whether somebody says anything after hearing it. Its just the expression of an elated heart.' So, likewise this pen does not have the ability to do justice to the wonderful feelings mentioned in this gatha by Srimadji,

Page #288
638 I am the Soul yet the awe inspiring omniscience of the Omniscient does not allow to remain silent. After all isn't that the goal of this jiva too! That is why I have tried to measure the value of the priceless treasure of Kevaljnana in so many words. Only the Kevali of course, knows the thoughts! What can the limited vocabulary - alpa vani - of an alpajna jiva - who hardly knows, have to say? More later ...

Page #289
A dream of millions of years... The pursuit of the three gems stops the movement of the jiva in the affected disposition. The jiva is indeed moving, in a way progressing; but both the movement and progress are in the path of affected disposition. The jiva lives in such a false belief that being born, living and dying are a sequence and that it will continue in the same way. Nothing else can be done about it! But the alleviating sages have told us that this wandering may well be from infinite time, but the strength to put a brake on it, to stop it rests within the jiva. Brothers! You know several factories continue to work day in and day out. Once set in operation, they sometimes run on and on for months together. But when it is felt necessary that the machines need to be stopped for a few hours or days, then it is just a matter in our hands. Just switch the power off and the machines stop. In fact, even your young child or any factory worker can do that job. They just have to know which switch needs to be turned off. Thus the machines of the inanimate world are in our hands. Man commands all machines working on the earth, however huge they may be. Not just these! But, even if spacecrafts created at the cost of billions of Rupees go into the space and develop snags, people sitting here can handle their repairs. Thus man has the power in his hands to decide when to run or stop all the equipment of the inanimate world. Of course, the man has to have the know-how. Well, Brothers! Same goes for the chetan machine too. Even that works day in and day out. Whether awake or asleep, it does not stop. The body may perhaps be put to sleep by administering

Page #290
I am the Soul anaesthesia, the chetan may stop receiving sensory signals from the body, but the prcoess of Karma bondage and rise is always on. 640 This process has been operating from infinite time. Not even for a moment through infinite time has this ever stopped. Yet, if the jiva minds and learns how, and if it manages to lay its hands on the switch that can bring the chetan under control, then the jiva itself has the power to stop this process. The difference lies in the fact that to switch off the inanimate machines you can send anybody. If you do not want to go to the factory, then your brother or son or just anybody can be told to either switch on or switch off the machines. But in the chetan process it is not the same. Its controls are not in anybody's hands. Only the self can stop the chetan process of the self, that is to say, can exercise control over the process of bondage and rise of karmas. Brothers! The other major difference between the inanimate machines and the chetan is that the machines can only do what they are designed for; can manufacture only a specific thing and nothing else. If your factory makes iron spare parts, and if you try to place cotton yarn on them and expect to weave cloth, it cannot be done. The machines have a limited scope, they cannot manufacture something that they are not meant for. While if the chetan process, having become transformed due to affected disposition, today produces anger, pride and such passions, it can also begin to produce the opposites like forgiveness, humility etc., if the jiva understands and puts in a strong effort. The jiva which has been transformed into the form of ignorance from infinite time, can attain kevaljnana in the flash of a moment. That mohaniya karma which was making the chetan wander in this sansar, will itself be uprooted and thrown out by the chetan. And the wheel of birth and death can be ground to a halt forever. That is the miracle of chetan! The wonderful strength of chetan! The total independence of chetan!

Page #291
I am the Soul 641 Srimadji has related the entire sequence of how the pursuit of samyag darshan transforms into the ultimate siddhi. Now, once the chetan decides to push out the affected disposition continuing from infinite time, how long would it take? Not very long! This statement, Srimadji supports with a worldly example koTi varSatuM svapna paNa, jAgRta thatAM zamAya; an fayra taifa, FIA GT ga aru .....888 When a sleeping person is not fast asleep but just in a trance, it is likely that the subconscious mind awakens. And the various influences lying within begin to pass through the mind like a movie. Sometimes for a long while, and sometimes short. That is what we call dreams. These dreams sometimes make sense, and at other times they are nonsense. At certain times they even point to something, but that is not often. Meaningful or pointed dreams appear rarely. Mostly they are meaningless, with no head or tail. Even the person dreaming doesn't know what its all about. Of course, as long as the dream is on, it appears as if it is really happening and that the dreamer is a part of it. But the moment it is time to wake up and the sleep gets over, and the person wakes up, the dream disappears, however long the dream may have been. Sometimes the dreams run all through the night. Why! Some people see the same dream for months together. If Kumbhakarna slept for six months, then his dreams would have been that long. And Srimadji says that somebody slept for crores of years and for all that time that person only saw dreams and dreams. It is not important how long or short the duration of the dream is, but how long it takes to get out of it, to end the dream. We have all experienced that the moment we wake up, dreams go away. Whether the eyes open or not, but the moment sleep gets over dreams also come to a halt.

Page #292
642 I am the Soul Similarly, this jiva too has been immersed in an affected disposition from infinite time. Its chetan process produces only affected feelings. But once knowledge arises, and the illusion is broken, then it does not take even a moment to throw out the affected disposition. Once the jiva realises that 'I am a chetan atma, and that this inanimate world is not mine', how will the affected disposition remain? Illusion is mithyatva. Believing a thing to be like what it is not is illusion. In darkness, a rope creates an illusion of a snake. You begin to scream out of fear. But, if somebody picks up the rope in hand and says, 'Brother! Look this is only a rope, not a snake', then the illusion is broken at that very moment. It does not remain. The jiva too has two types of illusions. One is the possessive nature - the feeling of possession in something or somebody who is not its own, that they are mine. This possessive nature leads to attachment and aversion and as a result there is only sorrow. But the jiva should think properly that no thing in this world ever belonged to or will ever belong to anybody. How can it at all? You are chetan, substance is jada. What relation can chetan and jada have? The two can never unite. Even when they meet, they cannot belong. Like two paramanus which join to make a skandha. They remain together for any length of time as a skandha. Then the two paramanus fall apart. Then they may or may not join up. So what appeared as united paramanus, could not belong to each other. Then how can totally independent chetan and jada belong to each other? No thing or person can belong to anybody. My and mine are merely illusion, nourishing illusion. The own valuable feelings of the chetan are the only things that belong to it, nothing else. For we see that when the chetan atma leaves the body and goes away, the thousands of things and hundreds of people present here do not go with it. They remain here.

Page #293
I am the Soul 643 Once a lady from an affluent family in Mumbai was heard saying, "When I am lying on my bed in my room, and I see all those things that decorate my room, the wealth, the ornaments and so on, I begin to feel that I keep saying all this is mine, my own and I feel very possessive about them, but will I have to leave this all here and die? I just cannot bear it!" But that is how it is. Everybody has left and gone and we will be doing the same. In practice we say that 'punya and papa will go along'. But even they do not accompany us permanently. When their time is ripe they too go away. So Brothers! In this entire world no thing or person belongs to us, nor will ever belong. It is very important to understand this to break the illusion. The second illusion is the imagination of one's own happiness in a thing or a person. Earlier we have noted that no thing or person is capable of giving happiness or sorrow to us. Our happiness or sorrow is in our thinking, our believing. Substances, things are useful necessities of life. They provide convenience. But they are not the whole and sole of life. Likewise, people too are merely companions in life. Nothing more than that. They are not capable of giving either happiness or sorrow. Once both these illusions are broken, the jnanadrishti -inner vision - of the jiva opens up. Illusion is like a dream. Just as the dream disappears when the eyes open, the affected disposition from infinite time also disappears when knowledge occurs. Jnana is the quality of chetan. That quality of jnana has been battered until now by transforming it in the perverse direction. Once the chetanavant one endowed with chetan - takes control of things, the atma which had been wallowing in affected disposition and ignorance, transforms into the state of knowledge, and then the affected disposition is removed. - In practical life, if there is a debt of Rs.10 lacs, then Rs.10 lacs have to be paid. The same debt can not be cleared with

Page #294
644 I am the Soul Rs.10,000/-. Of course, if you declare bankruptcy and say, 'I am unable to repay. I shall repay only one percent of the debt, then it may work. But you also have to pick up the disgrace that goes with it. But here it is not so. If you do not want to suffer the infinite karmas that are bonded with the jiva, if you do not want to pay for them, then you should manage to dissolve them - nirjara - in one stroke through supreme transformation of the soul. Then the liberation is almost instant. You can be free from the karmas without suffering them! Thus, when the jnanadrishti of the jiva opens up, when the glow of knowledge spreads, the darkness of affected disposition disappears in a moment. The jiva begins to transform into its original disposition. That is also the goal of the jiva. With the removal of the affected disposition, the resultant dharma that the jiva receives will be described later.

Page #295
. unrestrained true form! The pursuit of the three gems is possible only after the proper true form of the dharma is understood. Most people do not know what is meant by dharma. They keep on doing adharma, thinking it is dharma. As a result, the wandering of the jiva is not avoided. dharma is defined in many ways. Many presume that duties are dharma. Many others think that virtuous feelings are dharma. But it is not so. dharma in the form of duties is merely a practical arrangement. To properly run the activities, a person has to perform all his duties wherever he is. But such duties do not get treated as the dharma of the atma. Further, virtuous feelings are not dharma of any sort. Feelings of punya lead to bondage of karma, they are an asrava. Where there is asrava, there cannot be dharma. What is dharma? In Srimadji's own words - "Tirthankar deva calls samyag jnana, samyag darshan and samyag charitra as dharma. And here, there is an absence of bandha. Upholding the atma in the natural disposition is dharma. The natural disposition of atma is dharma. Not allowing atma to transform from svabhava - natural disposition to parabhava - affected disposition, is dharma. The atma has to accept degeneration - durgati - by going through affected disposition. Not letting the atma go towards durgati, and retaining it in the natural disposition is dharma. That which retains the jiva in perfect, infinite and unrestrained happiness by releasing it from the wandering of the sansar, is dharma. When does such dharma manifest in the atma? The Gurudev is explaining the final statement of 'means to moksa' to the disciple. The disciple has developed, within his self, an unwavering faith in the devoted pursuit - aradhana -- which has been indicated as a means to moksa, and he is eager to practice

Page #296
646 I am the Soul it. That is when the Gurudev describes to him the true form of dharma in a simple and straightforward style. He presents an experimental approach so that dharma manifests in the disciple chUTe dehAdhyAsa to, nahi kartA tuM karma; the vaj dettT J .....884 Dharma is where there is an absence of bandha. When does this state of abandha appear in the atma which has been binding karma - karmabandha - from infinite times? Only when the yearning for the body goes! The realisation that I am the eternally pure soul, independent of the body drives away the feeling that body is the soul and rectifies the error of believing that the body is the self. Once the feeling of belonging -- mamatva- is removed from one body, and then the jiva does not get that feeling ever in other births. The feeling of belonging in a body, which is the closest companion, is greater than in anything else. Therefore, with the mamatva in the body vanishing, with the feeling that body is the atma - (dehatma buddhi), vanishing, with the ability to differentiate between jada and chetan arising, the feeling of Ime-mine that is prevailing over all para dravya - external things - gets dissolved. Simultaneously, the feeling that "I am doing? that is the feeling of being a doer - karta - also dissolves and the jiva becomes an akarta. The state of being an akarta is in itself an absence of bandha. The total absence of bandha for jiva occurs only in the fourteenth gunasthana. But the absence of the feeling of being a doer - kartabhava - begins from the time the jiva arrives at the fourth gunasthana itself. The feeling of being the doer is mithyatva. "There is no feeling of being a doer in my pure natural disposition. I certainly am an akarta. When I am not the doer of my own natural disposition, of my own knowledge, not even of what is my own, then how can I be the doer of external feelings - parabhavas ?' As this sort of analysis begins to crystallize about the inner self,

Page #297
I am the Soul the kartabhava begins to dissolve. Once the kartabhava dissolves, it also takes along the bhoktabhava the feeling of being the sufferer. Let us try to understand this. The dissolving of kartabhava, that is a matter of jiva's understanding. It is understood. Once the discerning ability appears, then the jiva abandons the kartabhava. But the suffering is of the karmas that are reigning. Karmas have been done, they are reigning, so they will certainly arise. Then how can the jiva escape from suffering? 647 Here the term abhokta does not mean that it stops the rise of karma itself. It just means that the karmas, which have come into pradeshodaya, are not allowed to reach the vipakodaya state. That is to say, there is such an effect prevailing in the jiva which continuously runs the process of kshayopashama on the karmas which enter pradeshodaya. As a consequence, karmas which have arisen, do not result into painful forms. The Vedaniya karma noticed in the body is the cause of vipakodaya for mohaniya karma. The jiva cannot stop the pradeshodaya of mohaniya karma, but it should prevent its vipakodaya so that it does not hurt. This is how the several great sages of the past, who went through severe torture and agony, came out of it safe and sound. Whether porridge was cooked on Mahaveer's feet or innumerable scorpions stung Bahubali, both were the causes of suffering Mohaniya. But since the atma was no more influenced by the affected disposition, and prevailed within the natural disposition, mohaniya did not have to be suffered. It entered pradeshodaya and was worn out. It was wiped out through nirjara. Brothers! That is why these jivas attained Veetaraag state. Veetaragata cannot be attained without dharma. They had performed proper dharma..

Page #298
648 I am the Soul In the gatha too, this is what has been told: 'O Disciple! If your karta feeling and bhokta feeling get dissolved, then dharma will arise in your atma.' What happens with this dharma? He further says - e ja dharmathI mokSa che, tuM cho mokSa svarUpa; Bria GXTA FIT , 31atara Fathu .....38EUR When the jiva's karta feeling and bhokta feeling get dissolved, the effect on the intellect prevailing until now, that there is oneness with parabhava and paradravya, gets changed. It begins to exist in the own bhava with an unbroken feeling. Being stabilised within the self, coming away from parabhava and settling into svabhava is itself dharmu. Moksa is certain when such dharma awakens in the atma. For moksa is not some substance or some award coming from outside, but the complete awakening of the jiva's natural disposition. The state that results with the appearance of the svabhava of the jiva is moksa. The jiva has been an impure atma until now. Brothers! Just think, the feelings that arise within us are either the mild or strong feelings of attachment etc. That is the impure state. That is the jiva's perverted form, and we have been accepting that perversion as the true form of the self. That is the blunder we have done. A totally pure atma should feel, 'How can these impure thoughts be mine?' But this has never occurred to the jiva. That is why it believes that this state itself is my state'. As a result it could not practice the tremendous effort required to manifest the true original form. But when the jiva understands that the state of attachment etc. is the impure state, that its own pure state is something else, then it attains a freedom from attachment etc. and at that very moment dharma, that is the jiva's pure natural disposition in the form of akarta - abhokta feelings awakens, and karta - bhokta feelings dissolve.

Page #299
I am the Soul 649 The extreme state of this feeling of dharma, is moksa. That is why the sages say, "You are yourself in the form of moksa. "Your moksa occurs' actually means that you are able to manifest the complete moksa svabhava within your self. And the atma's qualities of anantajnana and anantadarshan are certainly not separate from you. The atma itself transforms into knowledge and darshana. For a jiva residing in the category of anantajnana, knowledge and the self do not appear as separate, the two have become inseparable. For anantajnana itself is the natural quality of the jiva. The quality cannot be separated from the substance. Therefore, O Atman! You alone are anantajnana, you alone are anantadarshana." Indeed, your true form is also unrestrained. Nobody can restrain that form. The atma is chaitanya - a formless arupi substance. There will not be badhya and badhaka feelings (of harm) in it. The feelings, which hinder the self and others, are badhya-badhaka feelings. For instance, water is a soluble and sugar is a solid substance. When sugar is added to water it harms water by turning it sweet, while water harms sugar by dissolving it. Both have harmed each other. Likewise, so long as jiva exists in parabhava and allows the prevalence of attachment etc. through the dependence on the par, the unrestrained direction cannot appear in it. On the contrary the badhya - badhaka feelings abound. For instance, mohaniya karma is jada; with the rise of this jada, the jiva transforms into attachment etc., and attracts the pudgals of karma category and binds them with old karmas. Karmas develop the nature of jnanavaran and the like and they envelope the knowledge. Here, because of the jiva, the pudgals of karmavargana were harmed i.e. the jiva has brought badha upon the pudgals. These pudgals are not distorted or in the form of karma in their original form. They are incapable of enveloping the qualities of the jiva. But they are of the nature whereby they get transformed within their

Page #300
650 I am the Soul own inanimate bhava. Jiva has nurtured the feelings of attachment etc. and brought harm to the pudgals, and transformed them into karma. Indeed, the jiva too in its original form is in the form of anantajnana. The jiva neither has ajnana nor alpajnana. It is sarvajna, having infinite knowledge. But the karmas have come and enveloped this anantajnana of the jiva. As a result, the ability of the jiva to transform into infinite knowledge was harmed and the malaise of ajnana - ignorance developed in the jiva. That is when jiva began to abound in ignorance. Thus, so long as jiva is with karma, it carries the badhyabadhaka feelings in it. The jiva harms the inanimate and the jada harms the jiva. But once the resident original form of moksa manifests in the jiva, when the anantajnana and anantadarshan of the jiva is uncovered, its avyabadha svarup - the unrestrained original form also appears. Now no power can harm the jiva. Neither does the jiva harm anybody. Sri Guru says that such a completely pure original form is attainable only through the own dharma. "Your own anuntajnanu, your own anantadarshana and your own avyabadha svarup which is in the form of your original disposition, will appear'. To further explain the pure original form, Gurudev points out certain wonderful qualities of the atma and offers the last instruction - which we shall look at later.

Page #301
If you think you will get... The devoted pursuit of the three gems brings forth the inseparability of quality and the qualified - guna and guni. Ordinarily, one in whom there is guna is called a guni. When we put it this way, it differentiates guna from guni. But in reality, the two are inseparable. That is why in the earlier gatha Srimadji has said that you are the moksa. You also are the anantajnana, anantadarshana and the avyabadha svarup. There is nothing apart from you. Now Srimadji wants to describe the wonderful and marvellous original form of such Chaitanya Prabhu. This form is so unique that it cannot be compared with any substance or special achievement of this world. Indeed, words are limited and the original form of the atma is unlimited, and hence it has been called indescribable. A poet has beautifully put it - zabdamAM samAya nahIM evo tuM mahAna kema karI gAuM prabhu tArA guNagAna . . . gajuM nathI mArUM evaM kahe A jubAna any of my art gurih .... hat... gaat gera afe, acurat in hArI jAya badhA mArA tarkanA taraMgo 3rechta s T 415 347414...264 ait ... The Prabhu here is our own Atmaprabhu - the Self! Its original form cannot be described through words. Neither the colourful imagination, nor the waves of logic, nor any estimation would work here. Such infinite is its glory. Such a glorious infinite original form is being described by Sri Guru to the best of his ability - for, he has partially experienced it. Further, he has the benefit of the disciple in his mind. With the intention of getting the disciple to recognise the greatness of the own soul, to get him to perform the tremendous effort and to attain self-realisation, the Gurudev says -

Page #302
652 I am the Soul zuddha, buddha, caitanyaghana, svayaM jyoti sukhadhAma; alui afeg oncej? faar at 474 .....989 O Disciple! I have made as much an effort as is possible of an incomplete person trying to describe the complete Lord Atma, to depict as much of its true original form as is possible in words. The limit of my vocabulary is reached. Can there be a more special ability in a chadmastha (ajnani) jiva? I am stuck here after describing the wonderful form of the atma. The atma is shuddha, buddha, chaitanyaghana svarup, swayamprakashaka and in the form of the abode of anantasukha - i.e. pure, enlightened, in the form of dense life energy, self-enlightening and the abode of infinite bliss. Atma is 'shuddha'. In the original form of the atma, there is no impurity. When we consider from the viewpoint of transformation, because of its relation with karma from infinite time, it touches pudgals. As a result it enters the gatis of deva, naraka, manushya etc., and through these gatis it gets the forms of jati, indriya, stithi etc. In other words, the transformations - paryayas of bodies are not the original paryayas of atma. Therefore, in these paryayas there is impurity. Moreover, jiva as a result of karma is affected by attachment etc. Where there are attachment etc., there is impurity. Impurity is not the original disposition of the jiva. Further, the paryayas are of a perishable nature. Paryayas are never stable, they are always perishable. Among them the vaibhavik paryayas are totally different from the atma. Karma, which is the cause of these vaibhavik paryayas is also different from the atma. Then how can paryayas be of the atma? Thus considering in the totality, the form of the vaibhavika paryayas of the atma is impure. That substance which is extremely pure in nature, will not undergo a change in its original form in spite of remaining with another substance for a long time. On the exterior, it might appear as if there has been a change, but in its original values there is no

Page #303
I am the Soul 653 change. Just as water, in its original form is always pure. Perhaps other substances getting mixed with water turn it impure, but it is possible to purify water again with an effort. The original purity can be seen again. Similarly, the pure substance of atma has been occupying the same space with the pudgal for infinite time. In other words, the extent and the location of the akash-pradesh i.e. the space of the sky which the atma is occupying, the karma and other pudgals occupy the same extent and location. In spite of having this relation for infinite time, the atma has not lost its existence as chaitanya atma to turn into pudgals. Neither have the pudgals turned into atma. That is the characteristic of substances. There is a very high purity in the original form of the atma substance. That is how, in spite of appearing very tainted with the effects of attachment etc., the atma can be purified with an effort. The Gurudev says, 'O Disciple! You are the chetan substance. Hence believe that you are extremely pure!' Atma is 'buddha'. It is in the form of enlightenment, knowledge. Omniscience is the true original nature of jiva. It is endowed with the capability of knowing all the things, which are worthy of knowing in this world, simultaneously. This knowledge is independent, and not dependent on anybody. The jiva has no expectations out of this knowledge. It is itself in the form of knowledge and transforms only into knowledge. In reality, jiva is only in the disposition of knowledge. The things that are worthy of knowing - jneyas, come and flash in the knowledge. Knowledge does not have to access the jneyas. But the jiva under the reign of karma, is no more independent. As a result, in spite of being completely enlightened, in spite of having the ability to simultaneously know infinite substances in their dravya and guna paryayas, the jiva has to depend on the senses and the mind to acquire knowledge. It has to acquire knowledge through a limited capability. As a result, it appears as if the limits of its knowledge have been bound. But in reality it is the holder

Page #304
654 I am the Soul of infinite knowledge. The knowledge of atma is complete and pure. This infinite knowledge never declines. The infinite space within atma is filled with infinite knowledge. The combinations of this infinite are also infinite. Even if infinite is deducted from this infinite, it still remains infinite. The possessor of such an infinite knowledge is the Buddha - enlightened atma. Atma is 'chaitanyaghan'. Chaitanya is a unique quality of the atma. It is only with this quality that the atma gets differentiated from all the other inanimate things. Excepting the jiva, chaitanya is not present anywhere else. In every space of the atma, chaitanya abounds. Therefore, it is in a dense form. It is a mass of chaitanya. Atma fills up the body. It occupies the entire body. Atma is expanding and contracting by nature. It spreads across the entire body that it occupies. Even if it is a body as large as that of an elephant, it expands and fills it up. Likewise, if it is the body of an ant, it contracts and remains in it. The infinite spaces of the atma's chaitanya, never break apart. They never separate from each other. For some reason if they are spread apart, their link remains. You might have seen the tail of a lizard thrashing about. For some reason the tail of a lizard gets cut, the lizard goes a little distance and struggles. Here the tail also thrashes about. Even in the tail the atma is occupying spaces and those are linked with the spaces in the body of the lizard. As a result the tail stops thrashing and dies out only after the atmapradesh of the tail is drawn into the body. Thus, the atma pradesh that was occupying a severed part of the body, enters the main body and does not get separated. It cannot be cut into pieces, nor can it be destroyed. If a person has a paralytic stroke, even then the atmapradesh of that part goes and gets absorbed in another part of the body. The atmapradesh, which occupied the paralysed part, does not get destroyed.

Page #305
I am the Soul 655 In the scriptures, there is a mention of "samudghata'. When the kevali parmatma performs samudghata to wipe out the other aghati karmas at the end of his lifetime, he spreads the infinite atmapradeshas in his body in the entire world. He establishes one atmapradesh on each of the akashpradeshas of the world. He again collects all the atmapradeshas spread out in the world and makes them fit a body. In doing so, not even one atmapradesh is broken, reduced, or separated; they always remain together. All these atma pradeshas are in the form of chaitanya. There is not a trace of achetanta anywhere. Even when the atma gets liberated, it is chaitnyaghan. When it leaves the last body, it contracts the atma pradeshas in the ratio of 2:3 of the body, i.e it lets go of 1/3 part and occupies 2/3 area. All atmapradeshas remain in this proportion in the dense state. For eternity they remain so. That is why atma is 'chaitanyaghan'. Atma is 'swayam jyoti'. It is enlightened by itself. What does not need external lights to light itself up is swayam jyoti. Since atma is enlightened, it lights itself, with itself, for itself, in itself by its self. Atma does not need any external light to know itself. It is self-enlightened and has the ability to know other substances too. For instance, the sun; it is not necessary to hold up a lamp to find out if the sun has risen. The sun itself lights up as it rises. You can learn about it even if you are sitting in the corner of your house. It lights up the entire world. Once the sun has arisen, the most powerful of flashlights are useless. Further, no oil, wick, battery or electricity is required to light up the sun. It is self-lit. The atma too enlightens itself through its own infinite knowledge, and also knows the lokalok. The flame of knowledge of the atma is self-ignited. It needs no manifestation. Hence it is "swayam jyoti". Atma is "sukhadham'. Atma itself is the lord of unrestrained, infinite bliss. Bliss is the original nature of the atma, for, veetaragata is also the nature of atma. Where there is

Page #306
656 I am the Soul veetaragata, there is bliss. The various alternatives of sorrow are all generated out of attachment etc. Where there are attachment etc., there is anxiety, where there is anxiety there is sorrow. Therefore, only in a state free of attachment there is bliss. Likewise, until now the pleasures generated from the senses were mistaken for happiness. But there is no bliss in them. It is the tendency of attachment etc. to absorb passions through the feelings of avarice. All the joys with which attachment and aversion are attached, are ultimately only sorrow. Therefore, only extra-sensory happiness is happiness, in which there are no expectations of any external influences. It is an absolutely free happiness. Happiness is in the form of the pure transformation that has emanated from the original natural disposition of the atma. That is why spiritual joy has been termed as nijananda. Only those great souls who have realised the self can experience this joy. That is when they know that in every space of the atma there is infinite happiness. In innumerable spaces there is infinite bliss lying about. The entire atma is filled with joy in all ways. That is why atma is 'sukhadham'. Thus, in each of the spaces in the atma, infinite purity, infinite knowledge, infinite life energy, infinite light and infinite bliss are manifest together and at the same time. Gurudev says, 'O disciple! Such is the unthinkable glory of Atmadeva! I reach the limits of my energy in trying to describe this infinite! What more can I tell you? Whatever and how much ever could be said, I have told you. Now it is up to you to think and achieve it. Awaken the pure effects of your atma. Go deep with thinking, into the original form of atma that has been described to you. Awaken divine thoughts in your inner self.' The power to think is a great power. With the help of this power, is possible to reach the deep bottom of the atma. It is possible to touch the power of the infinite knowledge of the atma,

Page #307
I am the Soul 657 and to awaken it. And it is possible to experience the self in the knowledge of the self. Thinking is the means to awaken the siddha state residing within you. That is why, you should purify the self and awaken the pure thought process. O Devanupriya! I have merely told you, merely pointed my finger. You have to perform the tremendous effort to attain spiritual bliss through thinking with the self. It is not possible that I perform the tremendous effort on your behalf. Several Trithankars have gone on the path of kevalis. You have to yourself tread on this path for progress.' 'That's it! My inner self is showering blessings on you from the very depths. Get prepared for your upadana. All influences will become helpful and appease your atmadeva. Go attain the bliss that has neither a beginning nor an end! More later!

Page #308
Naturally into a trance! This pursuit of three gems begets the blissful original disposition of the ultra pure soul - the abode of infinite bliss - 'ananta sukhdham'. The great atma craving for the attainment of total bliss, attains totality. Self is total, knowledge is total and bliss too is total. The atma attains that independent bliss where there is no scope of any sort of incompleteness. The bliss felt by the atma in the atma is the independent bliss, it does not have to resort to any other means. Whereas the happiness generated by the senses or the mind requires emotions or passions. A jiva seeks happiness through the remembrance of the passions which it has enjoyed, through the experience of the passions that it is presently enjoying and through the imagination of the passions which are yet to be enjoyed. That means, this happiness is counting on something, its dependent. Whereas the enjoying of infinite bliss of the self lying in the atma is free and independent happiness. Ultimately this is the goal of the jiva. The tremendous effort of the jiva is for the permanent attainment of total bliss. Here, the essence of all the discussion, related to the six statements - 'Soul exists' and so on -, the doubts raised by the inquisitive disciple and the clarification offered by the experienced Guru, is the attainment of the ultimate and supreme goal. Just as Gautama and other ganadharas have divided the thoughts postulated in the Agamas by the omniscient supreme soul Jineshwar, into four Anuyogas, Srimad Rajachandraji too has incorporated all four anuyogas in Atmasiddhi Shastra. 1. Dravyanuyoga - "Atmasiddhi Shastra- this very name is symbolic of Dravyanuyoga. It can be assessed from the name itself that the subject of atma would have been discussed in here. Where animate is discussed, inanimate is bound to be discussed.

Page #309
I am the Soul 659 Where a substance is being primarily described, there has to be another secondary opposite substance. All the substances of this world get categorised under the two substances - animate and inanimate. The Shastra begins with the words - Je swaroop samjya vina -- here Je is atma, the beginning is with the discussion of animate substance. By saying, 'atma che, - te nitya che...'-314-a fa- and so on, the relation of the atma and inanimate karmas, their result, the inter-dependence of vyavahar naya and niscaya naya, the freedom from the inanimate -jada-, and the appearance of the total, pure, indestructible animate - Chaitanya- and the attainment of the six states, is the statement of pure Dravyanuyoga. 2. Dharmakathanuyoga: At the first glance, it does not appear as if there is any story related in this Shastra. But by saying - guru ziSya saMvAdathI bhAkhuM SaTpada Ahi- Guru shishya samvadthi bhakhun shatpada aanhi - Srimadji has introduced a dialogue between the Guru and the disciple and made the Shastra very interesting. The Guru awakens the reader's interest towards Guru and Shishya both, from the very first doubt raised by the Shishya and the clarification offered. Then there is an intense curiosity as to what will be the next doubt and what its clarification would be. Simultaneously, the amiable relation between the Guru and Shishya presented through the various feelings of curiosity, anxiety, humility, dedication, faith in the word of Jina, and devotion etc., of the Shishya and compassion, affection and welfare of the Guru immersed in the Self, provides the essentials of an interesting story. 3. Ganitanuyoga - Srimadji has not left out the use of arithmetic to stabilise the wandering mind. He has said - karma anaMta prakAranAM, temAM makhye ATha; mAM makhya mohanIya.

Page #310
660 I am the Soul karma mohanIya bheda be darzana-cAritra nAma . . . SaT padanAM SaT prazna te . . . Beginning with the infinite and coming to the smallest number, he has very ably demonstrated Ganitanuyoga. 4. Charangkarananuyoga - Performance is the tremendous self-effort of the jiva. The attainment of moksa is dependent on it. Therefore performance is a very important angle. In the commencement of Atmasiddhi Shastra and while establishing the ultimate state as the means for moksa, Srimadji has told in many ways as to what is the duty of the jiva. The tremendous effort in pursuit of moksa begins with detachment, so he says - tyAga virAga na cittamAM . . . The imperative necessity for a jiva in pursuit to seek refuge at the feet of a Sadguru - pratyakSa sad guru sama nahi . . . guru rahyAM chadmastha paNa vinaya kare bhagavAna . . . traNe yoga ekatvathI varte AjJA dhAra . . . sad guru vaidya sujANa . . . The state of the soul and the means to attain it - kaSAyanI upazAMtatA . . . chUTe dehAdhyAsa to ... varte nija svabhAvano anubhava lakSa pratIta . . . sarva jIva che siddha sama . . . and at the end the offering of salutation at the feet of the sage in a state beyond the body - deha chatAM jenI dazA varte dehAtIta . . .

Page #311
I am the Soul 661 so many ways in which charanakarananuyoga has been descirbed. Thus, by offering a beautiful collection of all four anuyogas in this Shastra, Srimadji has guided jivas with varying ability, on the true path. After offering the wonderful explanation to the doubts raised by the disciple, the Gurudev says the last words of welfare and settles into a state of samadhi - nizcaya sarve jJAnIno, AvI atra samAya; dharI maunatA ema kahI, sahaja samAdhi mAMya O Child! Whatever I said until now is not something of my own. I have only said what the great sages with infinite knowledge have said in the past, what the sages say at present and what the infinite omniscient supreme souls to be in future, will say. All sages offer the same path for attaining the soul, and none other. Nothing short or nothing more than this, and nothing opposite either. For eka hoya traNa kALamAM paramArathano paMtha the path for supreme attainment is the same at all times - past, present or future. No change comes into the path of supreme attainment due to changes in substance, region or time. It is the same as it is. It will remain the same. That is why Gurudev says in the gatha that this is the inference of all sages. There can be no difference ever in it. 118 In practice too, it is said - so jJAnIno eka mata ane eka ajJAnIno so mata - ' a hundred sages have the same one opinion, while one moron has a hundred different opinions'. All the sagacious people in any field, at any time have the same opinion about life, about practice, about ethical values, about principles, or for that matter about any subject that applies universally. That is to say there is no difference of opinion about vyashti dharmas or samashti dharmas. But one ignorant person will have many opinions on the same subject. What he says now, he will say the same with an altogether different sense, a little while later. But the sages never change their opinions.

Page #312
662 I am the Soul The ignorant are experts in selfishness, hence they say whatever suits them, whenever it does. Brothers! Even in your field of salesmanship, you will transact according to the customer. For there is selfishness, and the tongue has no problem in turning the other way. It happened once. A person was visited by his relative after many years. Both were seated and talking, when the young son of the host came in and sat there. The guest asked with great affection, "Son! How old are you?" The boy was smart but at the same time very talkative, so he said, "Uncle! Which age of mine should I tell you?" The guest was perplexed. He could not understand what the child was saying. So he said with surprise, "Son! Age is age! What do you mean by which one?" "Look, Uncle! My age is of three types!" "Of three types! Well, what are those?" "My papa has told me, that when we travel on the train I should give a lesser age! When I have to sit at the school for study, I have to give a higher age! Otherwise I have my own age as it is! Uncle! Which one is it that you want to know?' Brothers! These are the many opinions of humans surrounded by selfishness. There is no possibility of oneness, concurrence in them! We are referring to sages, who are absolutely detached and selfless. Such sages show the same one path of attaining the supreme. O Disciple! I have presented before you the truth - principles as told by all sages! So saying, the Gurudev went into silence. He became immersed in the natural samadhi state. That was it! Whatever feelings were to be expressed by the Guru towards the Shishya, the Guru's task of being instrumental had been completed, and

Page #313
I am the Soul 663 he took leave. Here the Gurudev is a self-realised sage. The natural ability of becoming immersed in the true form of atma is manifest in him. Therefore, the moment the speech stopped, the body too stabilised, and all three yogas merged with the feeling of the atma, naturally going into a trance. Kabir has said HET! ES HAT sit... The jiva attains such a state that if it is sitting in a state of transaction, it will conduct its transactional duties, but the moment it is free from this duty, it will slide into the transcendental stage. Such a state is the true form of the jiva. Attaining such a state is the progressive state of the devoted pursuit of a sadhaka. Gurudev stabilised in such a state of trance. Brothers! This state is not attainable by all so very easily. I recollect, last year we were at Tirupur for Chaturmas. It was a very quiet and attractive place with great solitude. Ideal atmosphere for sadhana. There, just as I hold the session of meditation - "I am the Soul - here after the discourse, we used to meditate. After the discourse I began with the session. On the dais, my revered Adhyatma Yogini Bapji was seated. She stabilised in her meditation. The session was on for about ten minutes. We finished, but the revered Bapji was still in the trance. Along with the shravaks - shravikas, I waited for almost fifteen minutes. I waited so that after she came out of the trance, I could chant the Mangalik and Pachchakkhan. But since she was still in a trance, I had to complete the ritual. All the shravaks went away. That day we had visitors from Kolhapur. All sat there in absolute silence. The local brothers came again. They bowed before revered Bapji and went away. Later, almost another hour passed before she came out of her trance. She did not even know that the ritual of Mangalik had got over and that people had already left. Upon completion of the meditation, her face was beaming with a glow and happiness.

Page #314
664 I am the Soul Twice again revered Bapji went into a similar trance and was in that state for over an hour and a half. She easily attains such a state of meditation. Many a time she simply goes into a trance. Brothers! Such a state is not outwardly. It is an indication of the increasing purity of the atma. A sadhaka devoted to the self can attain such a state. Here, Srimadji refers to that state. After clarifying all doubts in the mind of the disciple, the Gurudev stabilised in the unprecedented joyous feeling of the soul. The last doubt lingering in the mind of the Shishya was also clarified. Having obtained a satisfactory explanation, his heart was full of feelings. He had received the most important message from the Gurudev. Hence, the words naturally flow from him - chaThThe pada te mokSa upAya che sahuna che sarakho adhikAra ( 2 ) rAga dveSa ajJAna baMdhana toDatAM ughaDe che mokSanAM dvAra mArI... ArAdhaka bhAva e AtmAno bhAva che guru kRpAe pamAya (2) lalita gurunI asIma AzISathI saMsAra sAgara tarAya Jain Educationa International mArI... The shishya's heart is experiencing the ultimate joy. He is now free from all doubts, and he is remembering the favour received from the Guru. All of a sudden his vision moves to the Guru, and his self experiences joy. It appears as if gentleness were dripping from the face of the Guru. Eyes filled with the most peaceful feelings are concentrating on the nasal tip. An unparalleled peace is spreading in all directions. There is a glowhalo spreading around the face. The face began reflecting the expressions of total detachment as if it were an idol. And the shishya's mind was overwhelmed with feelings of devotion. Such joyous feelings open the doors of the disciple's mind. The disciple For Personal and Private Use Only

Page #315
I am the Soul 665 experiences the difference of the atma and the body. The disciple is flowing in the stream of feeling of ultimate peace. He attained the seed of knowledge. For a while he remained unmoving. He could not utter a word. He was speechless. Gurudev is still in the state of meditation. The speechless disciple is enjoying the experience of the self. Now upon Gurudev's coming out of the trance, how the disciple joyfully describes the experience of his self within, will be rendered later.

Page #316
The state of self, located in the self... The devoted pursuit of three gems begets the jiva the unequalled state. Something that was never attained, never understood, never believed, never experienced before, is now attained, understood, believed and experienced. In Atmasiddhi Shastra the six statements have been explained wonderfully. The eligible disciple has received a revelation of all the six statements. This revelation has become instrumental in getting the disciple a never before experience of the atma. In other words, after properly understanding the six statements, they have been brought into the thought process. Out of this has arisen a marvellous state of thinking. Gurudev had said, 'If you think you will attain'. The disciple has picked up the words of the Gurudev, manifested the state of thinking and attained it. Here a question arises! If the sages have given this testament of six statements for the attainment of samyaktva, and as a result of following them, the eligible disciple touches samyaktva; if that is the case, then what is the formula that has been stated in the Tattvartha Sutra? In reply to the query of what is Samyaktva, Umaswatiji has said - tattvArtha zraddhAnaM samyagdarzanam Faith in the principles is samyag darshan. Is the faith in the nine principles like jiva to be taken as samyag darshan or the faith in six statements to be taken as samyag darshan? If considered discerningly and generously, the six statements encompass the nine principles. The first in the six statements is 'soul exists', the second is "it is eternal'. Through these two it is proved that atma is shuddha, buddha, forever benevolent, knower, sensitive in nature, eternally true, uncreated, indestructible, self-made chetan substance -

Page #317
I am the Soul 667 dravya that is jiva. And that, all other substances like body and others that are separate from the atma, which lack the ability to know and sense, lack chaitanya, which are inanimate are ajiva: Thus in the first two statements, the two principles of 'jiva' and 'ajiva' are included. The third statement is 'soul is the doer'. In other words, it is the doer of karmas. The jiva attracts both shubha and ashubha - noble and evil karmas. It also simultaneously binds them. Both processes happen at the same time. Attracting karmas is asrava and binding them is bandha. Thus in this statement the two principles of 'asrava' and 'bandha' have been included. The fourth statement is 'soul is the sufferer', meaning that the atma suffers the shubha-ashubha karmas that it has done. As a result of shubha karma, it suffers punya and as a result of ashubha karma, it suffers papa. Therefore, through this fourth statement the principles of 'punya' and 'papa' get established. The fifth statement is 'moksa exists' meaning that the jiva bonded with shubha-ashubha karma inevitably needs moksa. Thus the fifth statement has encompassed the principle of 'moksa'. The sixth statement is 'moksa is attainable'. What are the means to moksa? Means, which are contrary to those, which led to the bondage lead to moksa. The jiva suffered bondage due to asrava and bandha. If it performs sanvar, the asrava is stopped and then with the strength of nirjara, the bonded karmas get dissolved. Being free from all karmas is moksa. Sanvar and nirjara, make the jiva completely free from karma. Thus in the sixth statement, the principles of 'sanvar' and 'nirjara' have been established. Whether we consider from the viewpoint of six statements or from the viewpoint of nine principles, there is no difference in the two. A proper faith in the six statements proves the faith

Page #318
668 I am the Soul in the nine principles. But the faith has to be Samyak. The information obtained about the six statements or the types and sub-types of the nine principles is merely an acquaintance and not knowledge. Knowledge is that alone which realises the self, and stabilises the self within the self. Here, the eligible disciple, upon seeing the natural trancelike state of the Gurudev, has become elated and has himself got immersed in the Self. The meditative state of the Gurudev has made the disciple to introspect. This introspection has led to a sort of chemical reaction in the atmapradesha of the disciple. The chemical, which was hitherto flowing in the unnatural i.e. affected disposition, has gradually transformed and now it is flowing in the natural disposition. The entire chetan process, has become activated due to the power of the pure upayogadhara of the atma. As the work began to progress, the disciple began to experience it. What was only heard until now, became visible to his inner eyes and he also begun to experience it. This experience is not external. It is internal. It is emanating from the depths of the atma. The sensitivity dormant in every space of the atma became activated. This activity is so intense that it has begun to burst out in the body of the disciple. The pudgal body became exhilarated. The lotus-face became elated. The eyes became mild and the face developed a solemn appearance. The dumbstruck disciple began to find his words that appeared to flow from the atma. The sadhaka-disciple's feelings were thus expressed - sadgurunA upadezathI, AvyuM apUrva bhAna; FACT US FIT HIFE MED, GT ABFTA .....888 The grateful disciple expresses through his words, the experience that he has had. But first and foremost, he recollects the benevolence of the Gurudev. Although he obtained the bodhibija, through himself, within himself, the disciple still

Page #319
I am the Soul 669 believes down to the core that had the Sadguru not given the Bodha, had such a perfect motivation not been available, then 'I would not have developed such an eligibility that would help me attain samyaktva'. Therefore the first benevolence is of the Gurudev. To express his gratitude, he says - 'I did acquire the unique realisation of the atma, but it was with the blessings of the Sadgurudeva. The sat that was awake within the Sadgurudeva became the motivation for the awakening of the sat in my self. Otherwise this would not have been possible.' Brothers! Even the scriptures say that the jiva, which is Mithyatvi from infinite time, attains samyaktva only through its own tremendous effort. But if there is not direct yoga of the Sadguru, if there is no surrender - adhigama in the form of the Sadguru, then it never occurs. Adhigama has to be present first. Therefore, the benevolence of the Sadguru is limitless. There has to be a feeling of gratitude towards him. That is why, the disciple first remembers the benevolence of the Gurudev and then says, 'A never before realisation occurred'. A unique realisation of what? A realisation that had not occurred until now! je svarUpa samajyA vinA pAmyo duHkha anaMta 'Having been ignorant of that true form, I have suffered infinite sorrow' - that state of ignorance, about the own true form, which has led to the suffering of infinite sorrows of this infinite world. The jiva is always aware of all the subjects in this world from the very beginning, yet it is unaware of its own true form. Being in the company of pudgals, it has believed itself to be pudgal, and has always wallowed in the thought that the body itself is atma. It never rose above this state, to realise that 'I am not the body'. That is why the disciple says, 'what I had not understood from infinite time, I have understood now. Not merely with the intellect, but with a realisation in the atma too.' Only one who is conscious can have.

Page #320
670 I am the Soul his wit about him. It is not possible to gather your wits in an unconscious state. If physically unconscious people are oblivious of everything, then how can those who are spiritually unconscious, be aware of anything at all? That is why the disciple has not said, 'I have received a unique understanding, or acquired unique knowledge or gathered unique information'. No! He has said, 'A unique realisation occurred'. For until now owing to the charm of moha he had been unconsciously mistaking par for sva. He woke from this unconscious state and contemplated over the self himself, and that is how he realised the self. With the awareness there should come a spiritual gain; did it come? Nijapada means the awareness of 'I am the soul'. Until now the feeling of atma was mixed up with the body, senses, pran, mind and intellect. Instead of 'Atma is my self', 'Atma is my own state' being the belief, the jiva was wallowing in the belief that body etc. were the self. But when the awareness of the own state was realised, first of all it was clear that I am the soul', and then that body etc. are all inanimate paryayas, not my paryayas but those of the perishable pudgals. I am indestructible. I am an undivided unit. The many paryayas like body etc. that abound are not my form. The pudgal substance takes on many forms, it transforms into many forms. Along with it, I too have to get into that state. But I am not in that form. - I am the chaitanya - the life-energy power in the form of chit-chamatkar - a live miracle. There is chaitanya in the infinite spaces of the atma. Not even a single space is without chaitanya. The paryayas of body etc., are all inanimate paryayas. I have become like inanimate in the company of the body etc. But being inanimate is not my nature - dharma. My dharma is the eternal sat - chaitanya..

Page #321
I am the Soul 671 I am in the natural thought form of jnata-drushta. The feelings of knowing and seeing are my original true form. Jnana and darshana are my own qualities. The continuance of these qualities can happen only as jnata-drashta and not as kartabhokta. That is why the form of natural disposition of jnatadrashta, which is above all attachment and other affected disposition, is my true form. There is infinite prosperity within me in the form of the anantachatushtaya - the four infinites. The chaitanya atma, which possesses this unlimited wealth, is the supreme abode of infinite bliss. I am the soul with the immeasurable power to discern the infinite virtues that reside in me. Thus, all the perversions that had arisen due to the company of the par, in the feeling that atma and par were one and the same, get subsided. The jiva becomes aware of the own serene state. "I am but the soul; complete, indestructible, impassionate, formless, infinite, master of unrestrained bliss, discerning of the infinite virtues, completely Veetaraag in nature.' Such a neverbefore realisation occurred to the disciple, and he related the matter of this occurrence to Sri Guru. Gurudev had lapsed into a trance, immersed in the self. And the disciple while recollecting the benevolence of the Gurudev, was explicitly describing to him, through his inner feelings, the unique state that he had attained. The knot of attachment and aversion had been cut. The heightened flow of mithyatva mohaniya was destroyed and charitra mohaniya had declined. A never-before energy of joy was released and the disciple attained the bheda vijnana towards all par bhavas - i.e. external feelings. The atma and audarik body are different, the atma is different from the micro-body in the form of taijas-karman, the atma is different from the attachment-aversion and such affected

Page #322
672 I am the Soul dispositions. The atma resides only within itself. The jnanopayoga had got entangled with the par due to attachment etc. But now with the declining flow of attachment etc., with the knots getting disentangled, the jnanopayoga has stabilised in the self, in the own atma. The ignorance in the form of illusion is now past. The brilliance of knowledge is showing. Every light is lit now. The statement soul exists' which the Gurudev had told the disciple, was experienced by the latter as "I am the Soul'. Whatever was attainable by the disciple is now done. The unlimited benefaction of the Gurudev has been responsible for the disciple's life being turned to the sanmarga. The abilities of the disciple have brought a suphala - a good result. Now the disciple himself perfectly relates how his atma has been transformed with various thoughts in the unique state of self-realisation. That follows...

Page #323
Ageless, endless, indestructible and ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems begins with the acquaintance of the nijapada - the state of the self, and concludes with the attainment of jinapada - the state of Jina. This is the unity of nijapada-jinapada. Jinapada is like nijapada itself. That is why the pursuit of nijapada leads to the attainment of jinapada. When the sadhaka atma recognises the nijapada, all its illusions are broken. Where there are illusions, there are bound to be illusory motivations. And when illusions are overcome, motivations that lead to stability appear. The eligible disciple got the external motivation in the form of the Sadguru's Bodha, when his upadana was prepared. This became the motivation for the internal motivation. As a result of internal motivation, there was the kshaya of darshana mohaniya, upashama and kshayopashama and the disciple attained samyag darshan. He not only recognised the nijapada but also experienced it. The bliss of this experience was wonderful, its memory was wonderful, its state was wonderful. Indeed, he experienced the atma in the form of unity of nijapada and jinapada. Whatever the state of Jina is also the state of Nija. While describing how this experience was, the disciple says - bhAsyuM nija svarUpa te, zuddha cetanArUpa; 3752, 3777, stfahigit i derata Fathu .....ppo O Supremely Benevolent Gurudev! The illusions that I had about my own true form were all wiped out and I could realise my original true form. Independent of all inanimate, and unique in its own infinite and uncommon quality, my impassionate atma is in the form of pure chetana. The chetana may well be enveloped in the coating of karma, but in its original form it is extremely pure.

Page #324
674 I am the Soul Being completely pure is the natural disposition of the atma. There is no impurity or contamination in its impassionate original form. It has become passionate in the company of pudgals; it behaves passionately. Externally it appears passionate, but in truth it is of an impassionate, pure nature. Indeed, among the panchastikayas in the entire universe, jiva too is a special astikaya. Like dharma, adharma, akash and pudgal, its characteristic of being a mass occupying space, makes jiva akin to them. But jiva alone has the chetana shakti. The jiva gets separated from all the inanimate because of this chetana shakti. There is chetana only in the atma, not in any other substance. The characteristics pertaining to chetan are also to be found only in the atma, and nowhere else. Knowing and seeing, that is the jnata-drashta feeling is the jiva's quality that extends to external regions. Only atma has the ability to know and see other things. No other astikayas, or substances have this ability. Even the sensitiveness in itself is exclusive to the atma; and not present anywhere else. Dharma - adharma and akash have other powers. The Dharmastikaya has the quality of providing movement. Adharmustikaya provides steadiness. In the entire universe, Dharmastikaya is responsible for providing movement to both jivas and pudgals. If it does not provide movement, then the entire Universe would come to a stand still. No body would be able to go from one place to another. Similarly, Adharmastikaya enables jivas and pudgals to remain steady. If it were to withdraw this quality, then there would be no stability in the Universe. Trees, houses, or mountains would not be stationary. Neither would be the humans, animals or birds. They would be hurtling hither thither. The akash provides space to jiva, pudgal and other substances. Akash is the one, which encompasses the massive Universe that is made of fourteen Rajjulokas.

Page #325
I am the Soul 675 Thus all the three substances are beneficial to the universe through their qualities. But they are not endowed with an ability to sense within themselves, while atma gets separated from all these with its quality of sensitivity. The most special power that is there in the atma is this nature of sensing. That is because of the chaitanya. Where there is chaitanya, there is sanvedana - sensitivity. All the jada substances, which do not have chetana, also do not have sanvedana. That is why, atma with its chetana quality, reigns supreme over all other substances. Further, pure chetana can also be understood as the established infinite knowledge in the infinite spaces of the atma. Where there is chetana, there is knowledge. They are inseparable. They are a single entity, not dual. The unity of knowledge and chetana is itself atma. In the infinite spaces of the atma, there is not even a single space where there is no knowledge. Even in the spaces of atma lying in a nigoda from infinite time, knowledge exists, although under cover. When in the nigoda or in the minute uni-sensory being, the jiva tends to appear like inanimate, yet it is not. The main cause for this is that its quality of knowledge is not yet disappeared. There is such an unimaginable power in the atma, that it can manifest the entire knowledge which is there within and at the same time it can sense it. The poudaglika knowledge generated out of senses may not be utilised or sensed at one time but the atma's infinite knowledge is used at once. The Kevali Parmatma manages to see and know at once, all the dravyaguna-paryayas in the universe. He even experiences the infinite gunas lying within his self. Such is the wonderful and marvellous true form of the pure chetana. The disciple experienced this. As his experience grows, he says that he has now known the ajara, amara, avinashi form of atma. Ajara - (ageless) is that which does not jara - or grow old. That is to say, old age is the natural course of the body. When

Page #326
676 I am the Soul the body is born, it is a child. As it grows and time passes, it turns old and worn out. The body is a mass of paramanu pudgals. Every moment infinite paramanus from the body wear out and at the same moment, the same number of parmanus gets absorbed into the body from the atmosphere. This cycle is always on. The body also grows old on account of this cycle. Therefore, oldness is the situation of the body. With passing time, the body has to grow old. The atma is ageless. Not even one space out of the infinite spaces of the atma, ever grows old. In the infinite past, there have been infinite births and deaths. The atma has gone from small to large and large to small bodies. With the expansion or contraction in the size of the bodies, the spaces in the atma too expanded and contracted, but not even in one space were there any loss or gain. Atma is a mass of space. Not even one pradesh - space separates from it. The same number of spaces, as there were of the atma, remains forever. Thus the ageing occurs in the body and not in the atma. Atma is ajara. Atma is amar - deathless, endless. Death occurs to the body, not to the atma. Atma does not die; it merely changes the body. It remains in the body until the time assigned is completed, that is to say, until the age that has been determined by the ayushyakarma bonded earlier is completed. With the completion of the ayushyakarma, the atma separates from the body and goes elsewhere. There it occupies another new body - in other words, atma has no death, The jiva has a feeling of atma being the body. As a result, it carries the illusion that 'I have grown old, I shall die'. Believing the body to be the self, it mistakes the old age or the death of the body for its own growing old or death. That is why, with the onset of either old age or death, it begins to experience sorrow.

Page #327
I am the Soul 677 There is such a feeling of possession about the body in the jiva that it never occurs to the jiva that independent of the body "I am the soul'. The jiva has never thought that while it always keeps saying to the body that 'the body is mine', why does the body never say that you are mine'? The body has never assured the atma that, as is the practice in this world, if 'I become yours, then you too become mine'. But the body never says so, yet the jiva with its feeling of body being the atma, squanders its entire life in its service, in nourishing it, in keeping the body beautiful. At the end the atma has to leave the body behind and go away; the body does not accompany it then. Mahayogi Anandghanji Maharaj, who had experienced the state beyond the body, visualises a dialogue between body and atma, wherein the atma has these words to say - aba calo jI saMga hamAre, kAyA! calo jI saMga hamAre The Team of croit tarat! MITT HM 641 ... 31@... The atma says, 'O Body! My time is now up, you come along with me! I have looked after you very well all through the life. Is there anything I have not done to protect you? Just about everything ... tohe kAraNa jIva saMhAre, bole jhUTha apAre, aith a Tart Hait, no furan ...all... paTa AbhUSaNa suMdhA cuA, azana pAna nitya nyAre, tot FCA URETHE UG, Ha Hall Set... or... "Kaya - 0 Body! For you I have hurt jivas, spoken lies, robbed others, become infidel, did a world of sins and increased my attachment. All these five sins were done with the intention of getting you happiness and peace and to fulfil your desires. Not just that, I draped you in beautiful clothes and plastered you with fragrant cosmetics. There was always something new laid out to eat and drink. I have provided you with meals that comprised all six tastes that the tongue cherished. In return, you

Page #328
678 I am the Soul have converted all such tasty food into excreta. This whole life I have spent in pampering you. I have not looked after myself at all. Now, when it is time for me to leave, how can I without you? I do not like this. So you should accompany me! The atma is clamouring so much before the body, requesting it. It is expressing the helplessness in having to go away alone. It is pathetically pleading with the body to give it company. But the body gives a resounding slap like reply. It says -- jIva suno A rIta anAdi, kahA kahata bArabAre, #Terit att in dat, yru gue ets and ..tatar... Ojiva! Why don't you understand? This has been the practice from infinite time. I have never gone with you anywhere and shall not do so ever. Do I need to keep telling you this? Don't you understand such a simple thing? I just will not come with you. But look your own papa and punya will follow you. Go take them along. Forget my coming along. Hearing the body's jaw-breaking reply, the soul was dumbstruck. There was nothing it had to say. That is when Anandghanji Maharaj explains to the atma; shows it the true path - jinavara nAma sAra bhaja Atama, kahA bharama saMsAre ya alan mia pat a, 3tTIGUH suert..... al ait of FI E410, Jaren! at F 41... O Atam! If in this world of illusion, if there is one essence it is but the name of the Jineshwar. Just remember the name of Jina, go seek refuge at the feet of Sadguru, place complete faith in his words, and practice them with realisation, so that you will do your atma a great favour. The atma that is dense with joy will be able to experience you. In spite of the body and atma having a relation from infinite time, the body has never belonged and will never belong to the

Page #329
I am the Soul 679 atma. In spite of occupying the same space, when both have such a different disposition and form, how can they belong to each other? Atma is an eternal chetan substance, while body is a destructible inanimate substance; both being such diametrically opposite, cannot belong to each other. The moment the disciple became aware of this, he was able to realise the indestructible dharmavan atma. When the understanding occurs that jada substances are perishable and only chetan is eternal, the destruction of jada does not become a reason for lamenting. If there is faith in the permanence and indestructibility of the self, the atma will not lose anything even when any number of worldly inanimate things get destroyed any number of times. Not even once will the atma be destroyed. 'I am the ever eternal atma substance' - when such realisation is present constantly, how can there be sorrow? Indeed, where the jiva is aware of the perishable nature of a thing, to that extent it does not feel sad. If it brings in a flower garland that costs a Rupee and it is thrown away the next day when it dries up, there is no sorrowing. But if it brings in a small earthen pot for Rupees Five, and if it breaks in a week, then there is sorrowing. Why is it so? A firm belief is registered in the mind, in the subconscious that today's flower will be dried up tomorrow, while an earthen pot in spite of its breakable is expected to provide a service for at least 4-6 months or a year. It may not have cost much, but its loss is acceptable only after it serves to that extent. Thus we feel the sorrow to the extent of the beliefs attached to a certain thing. nature Man, who has such an understanding in practical life, does not realise that the body is perishable and it is bound to transform in the same way. Had it been indestructible then there would not have been the necessity to leave behind infinite bodies. There would have been just one body from infinite time. But it is not so. It will never be so. And hence, when the sadhaka disciple

Page #330
680 I am the Soul realised the self, it understood that I am not a substance of perishable nature. I am an eternal and indestructible substance - atma, independent of it. The body is perishable and I am indestructible, that shows that my true form is without the body. In other words, I am beyond the body. My true form is similar to the Siddha. I too am just like the Siddha whose true form is just pure-eternal-indestructible true form of atma. There is no difference at all. All the experiences until now were done with the feeling of the body being the same as atma, but they were merely external experiences. I have only experienced that my inner true form is so very different from the body etc. Had atma not been beyond the body, every time there was death, it would have taken the body along. But that has never been the case. When atma goes from one birth to another, it goes alone. Of course, the microbody - the taijas-karman body does go along. But it is only together until the jiva is involved with the material world. When it becomes free of all karma it is beyond all bodies and enters the abode of the Siddhas all by itself. The disciple is gradually getting a clear picture of his own true form in his own atma. Upon a deep contemplation of the statement of the Gurudev that 'atma is eternal', he has become aware of his own eternity and has realised that the eternal atma is ageless, endless, indestructible and beyond the body The disciple is progressing in the state of self-realisation. The developing transformation is purifying the atma. Now, what the disciple experiences further, will be related later.

Page #331
When the nature turns towards nijabhava... The pursuit of the three gems draws the jiva towards complete akarta feeling. This akarta feeling is the true form of the self. In spite of not having been the karta, the jiva has been always cultivating the ego of being the karta. When the true understanding awakens in the jiva, it realises the propriety of things. Its perverse beliefs get changed. The truth percolates into its faith. The eligible and inquisitive disciple has been able to awaken his conscience. The experience of the njiapada makes him aware of the propriety that resides in his self. Whatever he has been experiencing, he relates to the Gurudev. There is such unwavering faith in the disciple's self towards his Guru, that he believes that placing the self-experience before the Guru will enhance the continuity of that experience. That is why he is relating one experience after the other. After experiencing the pure eternal true form of the atma, he now relates his experience of the akarta feeling that permanently resides in the atmapradesha -- kartA bhoktA karmano, vibhAva varte jyAMya; vRtti vahI nijabhAvamAM, thayo akartA tyAMya O Gurudev! I have now understood how deep the karta - bhokta bhava of the jiva is. Having contemplated deeply over this, I have experienced that the jiva is believed to be the karta or bhokta in many ways from the vyavahar naya viewpoint. For instance, the jiva is the karta of many things from the impure vyavahar naya viewpoint - like the maker of houses or cities, like the maker of pots and pans. If a person runs a factory, he says, I produce a certain thing. In reality, it is a machine, which produces it. But since this brother inspires that production, he says he produces it. This is according to vyavahara. This is the worldly practice. Jain Educationa International 121 For Personal and Private Use Only

Page #332
682 I am the Soul From impure vyavahar naya viewpoint he is the doer of attachment and aversion. In spite of attachment and aversion arising out of the motivation of karma, they do arise from the impure state of the atma. Therefore, the scriptures have called them a form of chetana. But in reality, they are not the thoughts of the jiva. Had they been so, they would also have been in the Siddha. But it is not so. Therefore, as a formality, from the vyavahar naya viewpoint they are called the feelings of the jiva. The jiva too believes it to be its own doing. But when the jiva realises that 'I am not the doer of karma, cannot be the doer', it will not remain without understanding that karmas are different from it. The great poet Banarasidass says in his Nataka Samayasar jaiseM rAjahaMsake badanake saparasata, dekhiye pragaTa nyArI chora nyArau nIra hai taisai samakitakI sudRSTi meM sahaja rUpa, nyArau jIva nyArau karma nyArau hI zarIra hai jaba suddha cetana ko anubhau abhyAsai taba, bhAsai Apu acala na dUjau aura sIra hai pUrava karama ura AIM ke dikhAI deIM CAT 7 Eta frentari... Just as the kingly swan is able to separate milk from water in its beak, to the samakit jiva's sudrishti, jiva, karma and body naturally appear as separate entities. As the samakit jiva's study of the experience of chaitanya progresses, it does not see anything but the fact that it is an immovable atma. If the rise of earlier karmas is prevailing, it still remains aloof from that rise. It does not get involved with it. It has a clear realisation that it is not the doer of those karmas or of the feelings of attachment and aversion, but that it is a mere spectator.

Page #333
I am the Soul 683 That the jiva believes itself to be the doer of karmas, and in practice the maker of many substances, is out of its ignorance. In reality, there is no feeling of creation in the jiva. The jiva does not possess the ability of doing anything about the transformation of the substances happening in this world. In spite of all the five astikayas occupying the same space, they can neither get merged with each other nor take the form of one another. But the jiva has the motivation of dharma, adharma and akash. Here it is interesting to observe a principle. Ordinarily it is said that one substance cannot do a thing to another substance. What does this mean? The meaning to be taken here is that one substance does not transform into another. It does not forsake its own quality and disposition to take on the form and disposition of another. But the scheme of the entire Universe runs on the quality of substances motivating each other. This motivation may be with or without purpose, but there always is one substance motivating another. Let us consider; the disposition of Dharmastikaya is to provide momentum. It becomes instrumental in providing momentum to jiva and pudgal. In other words, jiva and pudgal attain momentum due to the motivation of Dharmastikaya. If we were to forcefully argue that one substance couldn't do a thing to another substance, then no jiva or pudgal would be able to move. They would always be stationary. Why! Even after leaving the last body occupied, the free jiva needs the help of Dharmastikaya to reach the pinnacle of the universe. Had Dharmastikaya not been there, the Siddha jiva after attaining anantavirya, would have been hovering somewhere near the body from which it had attained the Siddha state. Indeed, Adharmastikaya provides stability. Had the jiva or pudgala not attained stability with the motivation of Adharmastikaya, no jiva or pudgala would have been stationary in this universe. Everything would be moving. Not just that!

Page #334
684 I am the Soul Even the Siddha Bhagawantas would not have been stationary in their Siddha Kshetra. The stability of the Siddhas is owing to Adharmastikaya. Indeed, the Siddhas go and stabilise at the pinnacle of the Loka, because in the Aloka beyond, there is no Dharmastikaya. Had there been Dharmastikaya in the Aloka, why would the Siddha Bhagwantas remain at the pinnacle of Loka? Wouldn't they go away into the Aloka? But the reason that stops the Siddha bhagwantas from going into the Aloka, is the absence of Dharmastikaya and Adharmastikaya in the Aloka. Here it may just be a relation of motivation and motivated, but the fact remains that even for the Siddhatmas Dharmastikaya and Adharmastikaya are necessary according to Vyavahara. Of course, Dharmastikaya etc. do not have the ability to make any alteration in the substance of the Siddha Bhagawant's atma. Yet, they certainly are helpful. In fact, the space, which the Siddha Bhagawantas occupy in the Siddhakshetra, is provided by the akash. Here although the usage "provided by' is a formality, the fact remains that the Siddha Bhagawantas need the space in the akash pradesh to be in. Otherwise, where else would they stay? Not even one jiva, whether Siddha or sansari and pudgal would be able to stay without the space in the akash. Whether large or small, it still stays in the akash. So even the Siddha Bhagawant has the dependence on akash. It is without a purpose. Akash is unaware that it has to offer space to Siddha. There is no involvement of its own, yet the relation of motivation and motivated remains. Thus the principle, which says that one substance cannot do a thing to another, also says that except for the relation of motivation, no substance holds any other capability towards another. The relation is established effortlessly, it does not have to be established. Where it is necessary to do, and done with a knowledge, there the feeling of doing exists. Of course, it is true that one substance cannot intentionally do anything to another.

Page #335
I am the Soul 685 In practice, the feeling that we carry that we have done this and done that for a certain person is an illusion. You cannot do anything to anybody. It is not as if you decide and something happens. You just become instrumental for whatever was to happen. You do not have the power to do anything. Since the natural disposition of the jiva has no kartrutva - activity, you cannot do anything. The sages who wrote the scriptures, while describing the salient features of dravya - substance, say that, 'astitva, vastutva, dravyatva, prameyatva, pradeshatva and agurulaghutva are the features of a dravya.' They have not stated kartrutva as the feature anywhere. In other words, kartrutva is not a quality of any substance. Each dravya is totally of the akarta nature and is affected only within its self. The natural transformation of all the six dravyas is unintentional. There is no sort of cause-effect feeling in it. In the transformation in affected disposition there is the relation of motivation. Any work can happen with anybody's motivation; like the earthen pot. The transformation that was to happen in the soil to becoming a pot is it upadanakaran, and the pot-maker, the wheel, the staff etc. are all nimittakaran. That is to say, any jiva can take the form of a nimittakaran for another jiva, but the upadana is the jiva's own. It is from this viewpoint, that it is said that one substance cannot do a thing to another. It has been said - hotA svayaM jagata pariNAma, mai jagakA karatA kyA kAma? dUra raho para-kRta pariNAma, sahajAnaMda rahuM abhirAma . . . In the entire universe, each substance is getting transformed on account of its own transitions. I do not have the power to do anything in the world, to the world. Only if the feeling, that I can do something, could be distanced from my self, then I could enjoy the bliss of nijanand - the bliss of the self. The disciple too says the same thing. So long as he was transformed in the affected disposition, he came to be called the doer-sufferer of karma-karma's results. Or I myself believed

Page #336
686 I am the Soul myself to be karta-bhokta. But when the inner activity was directed towards the self, when involvement with the para was overcome, when the karta feeling that had been believed in the company of para was given up along with that company, then I realised my akarta feeling. In reality, the infinite atma pradeshas prefer supreme stability. In other words, supreme stability is the natural disposition of the mass of atma pradhesas. Indeed, stability comes only with the feeling of complete gratification. As long as there is the company of karma, there is instability; a desire to do something. But with the arrival of the state of aloofness, kartrutva ends and the atma attains supreme stability, where there is only the akarta feeling. The disciple has turned away his activities, canalised them into the own atma and has become an akarta. Earlier there was the feeling of the body; there was ignorance of the self. That is why he was alleging the karta status of the self in other feelings and other substances. But with the arousal of the flame of knowledge, his ignorance was dispelled and illusion was broken. The utilisation of knowledge of the atma, which was until now in external feelings and external substances, has now returned and is engrossed in the feelings of the atma. It is now sensing the self. And when the atma gets engrossed in sensing the self, the karta-bhokta feelings cannot remain. They are removed, and the atma experiences the supremely pure feeling of being an akarta. The disciple has recognised, understood and contemplated over the atma's formal feelings of karta-bhokta and even partially experienced the akarta - abhokta feelings of the atma in its pure original form. Thus, the disciple is establishing one statement after another through his own experience. He is enjoying the bliss of nijananda. What more this experience has to say, we shall soon see . . ..

Page #337
... the form of pure chetana! The jiva pursuing the three gems becomes chetanavant with the contact of chetana. Jiva is chaitanya and chaitanya is jiva. There is no jiva independent of chaitanya. Apart from the jiva, chaitanya is found nowhere else. But the jiva stuck in the inanimate world does not experience this chaitanya. Once the jiva faces the self, then it experiences that it is pure chetan. Its affection with par feelings is overcome. The feeling of possession in the company of par pudgals is swept away. It becomes totally aloof. It begins to sway in the bliss of its own knowledge. It gets immersed in the wonderful and marvellous bliss. The fortunate disciple has had the touch of pure chetana. With the experience of the chaitanya his feelings of ego and possessiveness in par have diminished. He has overcome the karta-bhokta feelings. That is why he is telling the Gurudev, 'My natural disposition of knowledge had been involved with the par, in trying to know the pudgals. It has now come away from there and has begun to transform into sensing the nijabhava and atmananda. As a result I am now fully convinced that I am not the karta-bhokta, and have recognised the akarta feeling residing in my pure true form.' 'Indeed, if the karta-bhokta feeling can be attached to me from any viewpoint, it can only be in the pure form of my chetana, and in nothing else'. He says - athavA nija pariNAma je, zuddha cetanArUpa; kartA - bhoktA tehano, nirvikalpa svarUpa 122 The feelings of the chetan when it is getting transformed within its natural state are always in the form of pure chetana. There is no element of impurity in it. There is only the sensitivity of the own feelings of the jiva. The natural disposition of the

Page #338
688 I am the Soul jiva is sensitivity. The jiva in its own region is sensing infinite knowledge. This knowledge is in the form of the transformation of the self, in the form of pure chetana. Here, by referring to pure chetana, it is implied that there also is an impure chetana. It is a natural law that all the things that there are in the universe have an opposite. Therefore, by referring to pure chetana, the existence of impure chetana is involuntarily proved. Let us first understand what is pure chetana. This chetana is called jnanachetana. The experience of the natural bliss of the self, which is not different from the atma, is the experience of knowledge. The state of experiencing the infinite knowledge that resides in the infinite spaces of the atma is jnanachetana. When knowledge becomes Samyak i.e. true, and experiences the atma, then it is jnanachetana and that itself is pure chetana. The impure chetana is the false view other than the knowledge of atma. When the jiva ignorantly believes the attachment etc and the various states that occur because of them, to be its own, it is ajnana chetana. That itself is the impure chetana. It has two types - 1. Karma chetana, and 2. Karmaphala chetana. The atma is jnanasvabhavi - it is knowledge in its natural disposition. Other than this, all other feelings are anatmabhava. It is itself generating all those feelings. The constant feeling of 'I do, I do' that prevails, is the karma chetana - where the intellect is into doing something. Just look at the ignorance of the jiva! It can do nothing in the par, yet it believes that things happen only when it does. If it did not do anything, then nothing would happen. Almost every jiva is in this illusion. It is a state like the dog under the cart. A poet has said - huM karUM, huM karUM e ja ajJAnatA grahent HR 4 TA aut....

Page #339
I am the Soul 689 On a hot summer day, when the farmer goes to the farm in his cart, the domestic dog goes along. It is quite sunny, and there is enough space below the cart to allow the dog to run along. When the dog cannot bear the heat, it begins to tread under the cart. And then it is proud that 'I am carrying this cart along, if I stop now, the cart too has to stop. It cannot proceed.' What a great illusion! If the dog were to stop, it would be left standing and the cart would go away. Likewise, the jiva believes that 'Only if I do this the scheme of the universe would run, else it would come to a standstill!' But in this universe, so many animals and humans were born and dead, yet the universe continues to go on. It has never stopped anywhere. So this false pride, that "I do, I do' is the Karma chetana. The sensation that the self is the bhokta of feelings other than knowledge, and those of happiness and sorrow, is karmaphala chetana. The sensation that prevails at every moment that 'I endure, I endure', is the karmaphala chetana. Why is the term chetana attached here? All the three experiences in the atma, that of knowledge, the feeling of being karta, and the feeling of being bhokta, occur through chetana alone. Experience is a sensation. Sensitivity is there in chetana alone, not in the jada. The jada has no sensation either internal or external. All the sensation occurs through chetana, and hence the term chetana has been attached. The sages tell us about which sort of jivas are subject to these three chetanas. Immovable uni-sensory jivas have the karmaphala chetana. Immovable jivas do have the ability to sense, therefore they can feel that they are suffering the joy or sorrow resulting from karmas. The experience of joy and sorrow occurs within these jivas, but they are unaware of what they are doing. They cannot experience 'I am doing', although they are doing things. They feel attachment etc. and as a result they have karma bondage. There is karma bondage but no sensation of karma.

Page #340
690 I am the Soul The sages who wrote the scriptures, say that all five types of uni-sensory jivas have a constant styangriddhi nidra -- a kind of slumber. This slumber is like a state of unconsciousness. As a result, the jivas do not know what they are doing, but they can sense joy and sorrow. So it is said that these jivas have karmaphala chetana. In the trasa jivas, both karma chetana and karmaphala chetana are present. They are aware that they are the karta. They have the experience of doing things, as in 'I do'. And they are the bhokta of external feelings. They experience the feelings of being bhokta, as in 'I suffer things'. As such, both the sensations abound in them. These two sensations are there only as long as the jiva remains transformed in the affected disposition; and that too, only from the vyavahar naya viewpoint. But from the niscaya naya viewpoint, the jiva is the karta of only the natural disposition of jnana etc. The great poet Banarasidass has said - bharamasauM karamakA karatA hai cidAnaMda, daraba vicAra karatAra bhAva nA hicai The chidanand atma is a karta of karma only because of illusion. But when considered from the dravyatmak viewpoint, atma is the doer of only the own feelings. Similarly - gyAna-bhAva gyAnI karai, agyAnI agyAna, darva karma pudgala karai, yaha nihacai paravAna It should be understood from niscaya that the karta of jnana feelings is jnani, of ajnana feelings is ajnani and of dravyatmak feelings is a pudgal. Thus the jiva is the karta and bhokta of only the pure chetana in the form of its own jnanopayoga and darshanopagyoga, which happens to be the pure state of peaceful true form, a state of trance. It has also been said -

Page #341
I am the Soul 691 yatkSaNaM dazyate zuddhaM tatkSaNaM gtvibhrmH| svasthacittaM sthiribhUtaM, nirvikalpaM samAdhinA / / The very moment there is the realisation of the pure true form of the atma, the illusion is wiped out. The chitta becomes fine, and acquires stability, and the jiva attains the peaceful state of meditation - samadhidasha. The impure chetana is the state of disturbance. For vikalpa keeps arising. Getting mixed up with vikalpa and allowing the self to transform accordingly, and believing that the self is in that form, is the vikalpa state. There lies instability. A jiva within its own transition does not get mixed up with any vikalpa when it rises. It remains aloof. It transforms only within the sensation of its own pure chetana. Remaining within the experience of the natural disposition of jnana is the nirvikalpa state. The disciple had an experience of such a nirvikalpa state. He went beyond the feelings of karta-bhokta. Thus he has declared before the Gurudev that he had experienced the third and fourth statement in his self. Now there is no doubt about the fifth and sixth statement. The fifth statement is moksa and that is the ultimate achievement. That is yet to be attained. The sixth statement being the "means to moksa' is now taking shape in the effort of the disciple. How the Gurudev has briefly explained the means to moksa and what he has understood, the disciple is telling us - mokSa kaho nija zuddhatA, te pAme te paMtha, 94511 fatuni, Haos urf frify .....PR3 O Gurudev! I have now understood through contemplation within my atma, both the moksapada and moksapanth as you had mentioned. The complete uncovered, impassionate and indestructible pure state of atma is the moksapada. And the effort made for the attainment of this state is moksapanth.

Page #342
692 I am the Soul Why seek the means to attain moksa? To manifest the state of pure, natural disposition of the atma which is presently hidden. The atma which is presently transformed into impure feelings, is in an impure state of human and naraka etc. forms, and in the feelings of attachment etc. The completely lonely atma is now in the company of pudgals and as such its impurity is not overcome. If the atma becomes aloof and brings an end to the sanyogas of body etc., the supreme stability that abounds in the infinite spaces of the atma will arise in an instant. The moment the company of the ghati karmas like jnanavaran etc., which are obscuring the purity of the atma, is given up, the virtuous qualities of anantajnana, anantadarshana, anantavirya and anantakshayika bhava will appear. And when the aghati karmas are dispelled, the qualities of ananta akshaya stithi, amurtatva, agurulaghu and ananta avyabadha sukha appear. In reality, all the eight qualities get absorbed into one kevaljnana. Where there is jnana, there is darshan. Jnanopayoga is a special upayoga. Darshanopayoga is an ordinary upayoga. The ordinary gets absorbed into the special. There is infinite power in kevaljnana. It can see and know about all substances, qualities, and transitions in the universe at once. All things worthy of knowing are reflected in this knowledge at once. Kevaljnana manifests only with the supreme kshayika bhava. The mati and other jnanas occur in the kshayopashama bhava, but kevaljnana occurs only in the kshayika bhava. Kevaljnana being infinite, it cannot ever be destroyed; therefore it is in the akshaya stithi form. There is no name or change of name, no form or transformation in Kevaljnana; hence it is amurta-arupi. There cannot be loss or gain in kevaljnana; hence it is agurulaghu. There is a constant, natural, and simple nijananda experience in its own region, in kevaljnana; hence it is in the form of ananta avyabadha sukha.

Page #343
I am the Soul 693 Thus, since all the qualities get encompassed in one kevaljnana, it has been called kevaljnana. The state of atma where there is no variety, except knowledge alone a constant, unparalleled, impassionate state -- that is kevaljnana. Progress in this nirgrantha state, the gradually purifying state of atma attained through the breaking of the knots of attachment and aversion, which leads to the attainment of the state of kevaljnana, is the moksa panth. It is in the form of the devoted pursuit - sadhana of samyagdarshan, samyagjnana and samyag charitra. When this sadhana transforms into the sadhya -goal and becomes an attainment, the atma attains the nijapada in its totality. Atma is itself in the form of jnana etc., because those are also the characteristics of a jiva. nANaM ca daMsaNaM ceva, caritaM ca tavo tahA / alfri sassimi a, yei ziazza margui 11 Jnana, darshan, charitra, tapa, virya and upayoga are the six characteristics of a jiva. The incompleteness of these characteristics is the sansari state and their completeness is the moksa state. In the inner self of the disciple, the faith in all the six statements is percolating in the form of practice. With the accomplishment of such a wonderful attainment, the disciple's atma is remembering the benevolence of the Gurudev with gratitude. He has already dedicated his faith at the feet of the Gurudev. Now, especially recounting the benevolence of the Gurudev, the disciple is dedicating his complete self at the Gurudev's feet, and expressing his own feelings. These will appear later..

Page #344
Aha, aha, Shri Sadguru ... The pursuit of three gems cannot be done without the benefaction from the Sadguru, without his guidance. Never has any jiva been able to step on the path to sadhana without seeking refuge with the Gurudev. If the Gurudev's kindness prevails, the disciple can even attain Kevaljnana. It is seldom heard or seen that some great man attained selfrealisation even without the guidance of a Guru. Srimad Rajachandraji, who gifted us the Atmasiddhi Shastra, himself did not have any Guru in this present birth. Yet the level of his self-pursuit was of a very high order. When we consider this, it may occur to us that if he could perform such a sadhana without a Guru, then can we not do it? In the very recent past, there was one such yogi Maharshi Ramana, of the Mount Arunachal. He had wonderful abilities. His childhood had been very ordinary, like other children, without any noteworthy events. Yet at the age of 18, he suddenly realised his self at his residence. He experienced the trance of the atma. In fact, at that time, Maharshi himself had not realised what was happening to him. He was even unaware of the terms atma and paramatma! The thought - 'what is the pursuit of the atma?', had never ever occurred to him. Yet there was an experience and he walked out of his home. An irrepressible attraction of the Arunachal Mountain of southern India was drawing him to itself. He reached the cave on the Arunachal Mountain near Tiruvannamalai, and remained there for years in total silence. His constant state of self-realisation was of such high order that the feeling of total detachment was naturally abounding in him. This simple, natural state of his remained with him constantly. He himself used to say that the realisation - experience which occurred at home, at the age of 18, continues to abound even to this day'. He remained at Arunachal for 50

Page #345
I am the Soul 695 years. He was in the same state immersed in the self. He did not have to do any more sadhana. He simply sat alone in silence. Brothers! Be it Srimad Rajachandra or Ramana Maharshi, they were born with the natural state of self-realisation from their previous birth. They were yogis of the past whose yoga had been corrupted. The scriptures call those jivas who leave their devoted pursuit incomplete as they reach the end of their life in the previous birth as yogabhrashta atma. These two were of that category. But how did this ability occur in them? Such eligibility can appear only in those who would have served at the feet of a Sadguru; walked the path indicated by them with full obedience and faith; and worn out their ego at the feet of the Sadguru. Such a sadhaka jiva attains the dasha-state - and thereby the dishadirection, and once held, the lead to the direction cannot be cut even over many births. As a result, such great souls do not need a Guru. Yet Srimadji always carried the regret that he had not been able to find refuge with any Sadguru in this birth. However, his present state certainly proved that he had earlier performed sadhana in the proximity of a Sadguru. The fact cannot be disputed that Upadana is no doubt, our own, but the strong motivation is a Sadguru. Here, an eligible disciple has met a competent Sadguru, who showed how the six statements are proved and awakened a faith in the inner self of the disciple. But the inspiration of the Gurudev's samadhi state was wonderful for the disciple. The Gurudev's samadhi awakened a bliss within the disciple. The disciple's atma became aware of the goal of the soul. Brothers! With us, the greatness of satsang has been highly praised. Satsang happens in many ways. Listening to the preaching of the saints in their company is satsang indeed, but sometimes merely their proximity turns out to be more effective. We may not even hear a single word from them but the feelings that abound within them; the positive atoms, which emanate from

Page #346
696 I am the Soul their body, are so effective that they bring about a turn in the life of a person. Many people have experienced such a thing in the company of Ramana Maharshi. Authors who have written his biography have themselves experienced it, and have also recorded such experiences of many others. Not long ago, I read an essay by Dhirendra Jani. He has written that in 1949 he had been to Tiruvannamalai to see Maharshiji. Maharshiji was meditating in his Meditation Hall. The author went and sat before him. Just sat there, there was no preaching, no prayer, no devotion - not a single word was spoken. There was nothing at all that happened, yet Jani writes, "The transformation that occurred within me, in his presence was something wonderful, out of this world. I had never believed in such things, yet there was some strange power; the effect that the positive vibrations there had on me, was something unique." Another similar matter - In the south, towards south of Karnataka, there is a place by name Udupi, where there is an Ashram. The founder of that Ashram, Swami Ramdas writes in his autobiography, that when he had once been to Arunachalam, Maharshiji was residing in a cave near a Banyan tree. He was meditating under the tree. Swami Ramdas stood before him for just about 25-30 minutes and he had a self-realisation. Such is the effect of the direct satsang of the saints! The words that emanate from the mouth of satpurushas are indeed only inanimate pudgal, yet as they come replete with the feelings of sadhana, they cannot but have an effect on the sadhaka. In just the same way, the atoms which are released from the body, mind, chitta and intellect of the satpurushas, are soaked in the feelings of their chetan atma and as such they have a tremendous effect. Here, the proximity that the disciple got during the period of the Gurudev's samadhi, turned out to be extremely beneficial

Page #347
I am the Soul 697 and the doors within him opened up. He realised the essence that was lying within and recognising the benevolence of the Sri Guru, threw himself at his feet. Words were inadequate to describe this benevolence. Yet since words are the means to express the feelings of the heart, he exclaims - aho! aho! zrI sadguru, karuNA siMdhu apAra, 371 THE U on Tulf, BET! BET! 34ory .....888 The greatness of the Sadguru is overwhelming the disciple's heart. He is wondering, 'In what words do I describe the greatness of such a great Guru?' It was as if there were no words found. There was not enough ability in the words to evaluate the Gurudev. When the disciple experienced this, the exclamation, "Aha! Aha!', just slipped out of him. When a person sees an uncommon form, quality, knowledge, or power and gets exceedingly impressed with it, describing that phenomenon becomes impossible for him. He cannot describe them. That is when such exclamations of surprise are escape involuntarily. Sri Prabhu has told in the 'Uttaradhyayan Sutra' - When King Shrenik sees the young Anathi Muni seated in deep meditation beneath a tree in the garden, he is astounded by his looks, his form, his tranquillity and his unparalleled impression, and exclaims - TET! quunt, Bret! FCI, BET! 3 HATI BET! UAI, BET! gait, Bat! TT START II "Aha! What colour! How handsome! How tranquil is the Arya! Aha, what forgiveness! How detached! How removed from the material ways!' King Shrenik realised upon seeing the physique and the face of Anathi Muni, that this was no common person, but a princely youth from some very well-to-do and high family. The perfect qualities apparent on his face cannot be described in words; there cannot be any similes for them.

Page #348
698 I am the Soul The benevolence that the Guru had showered upon the disciple and the greatness of the Guru are beyond words, there are no parallels to express. There cannot be any similes for them. That is why only an exclamation is expressed. Gurudev's benevolence on the disciple was like the deep ocean. Just as the depth and the expanse of the ocean cannot be measured, Gurudev's limitless compassion cannot be evaluated either. Gurudev holds such compassion. He let all his compassion flow upon the disciple. That the disciple could attain the eligibility to receive such compassion is itself his great fortune. There is a forgotten character from the history of our country. The eldest brother of the five Pandavas -- that is Kuntiputra Karna. Kunti abandoned him for fear of the society. He grew up at the house of a charioteer and hence came to be called the Charioteer's Son - Surathiputra. He was despised everywhere, yet Kunti never bothered about him. Karna joined the Kauravas and became an enemy of the Pandavas. He was unaware that Yudhisthira and others were his own brothers. He went around seeking to learn archery. But he was a charioteer's son, and hence nobody respected him. He had heard that Parashuram was avowed to rid the earth of Kshatriyas and that he was imparting training in arms to Brahmins. Karna wore a false cross-thread and went to Parashuram. He introduced himself as a son of a Brahmin and becoming the disciple of Parashuram, set about learning the art of combat. Having found such a disciple with a handsome bearing, unparalleled physique and wonderful courage, Parashuram began to feel fortunate. He had never until then met such a disciple. No one had come to him with such enthusiasm and courage to learn. Therefore, he was preparing Karna unmindful of his own exertion. Karna was learning the knowledge imparted by the Gurudev with all faith and total dedication.

Page #349
I am the Soul 699 Karna's training was on the verge of getting over. He was to soon take leave of the Gurudev. The Guru was not happy that such a disciple was to go away. Yet he was there only to learn the arts and was bound to leave. There was a time when Parashuram was residing in his hut amidst lush green surroundings on the hill. The atmosphere was beautiful and pleasant. It was an afternoon and the sun was shining bright. Parashuram's old body desired a rest and he says to Karna, "Son! Come let us rest a while under the shadow of that great tree! You may sit down and I shall use your lap as a pillow." Brothers! Think! What and how much does the Gurudev feel for the disciple? How satisfied he was with the disciple! How tortunate the disciple must have been, for the Guru had felt like sleeping in his lap! A disciple does sleep with his head on the Guru's lap, but when the disciple gets the honour of receiving the Guru on his lap, it is impossible to measure the extent of affection that fills the Guru's heart towards him. Karna is seated, and Parashuram is sleeping with his head in Karna's lap. In a moment Parashuram slipped into a deep sleep. Karna was watchful that no mosquito or insect would bother the open torso of the Gurudev. He was also thinking about his own life. He felt overwhelmed by the benevolence of the Gurudev. Oh! What a great effort this old body is taking for me! How affectionately, how lovingly the Gurudev has been teaching me the arts! How can I repay the benevolence of such a Gurudev? These and many such thoughts were bringing tears to Karna's eyes. The heart was filled with gratitude towards the Guru. Just then a poisonous insect arrived. Karna was unmindful, being fully immersed in the thoughts about the Gurudev. He was wearing just a loincloth. The insect stung him on the inside of the thigh. It was a severe sting. It was painful no doubt, but

Page #350
700 I am the Soul Karna did not move to remove the insect. He thought, "If I were to pick up the insect and throw it away, my body would stir and in turn Gurudev's sleep would get disturbed. No, let the insect bite, what harm can it do?" Karna did not move. The insect found it easy going. It began to bite deeper. It bit into the skin on the thigh, and then deeper into the flesh. The pain was unbearable but Karna was bearing it quietly so that Gurudev's sleep would not be disturbed, that he would not be bothered. But Brothers! Call it Karna's misfortune; the wound on the thigh began to bleed. Karna was unaware but blood began to flow in a stream. Karna was immersed in devotion and the blood flowed on. He was experiencing the gratitude towards the unlimited benevolence of the Guru. The blood stream reached the back of Parashuram sleeping with an uncovered torso. The moment the hot blood touched him he awakened and sat up. And he saw Karna's thigh bleeding. "Son, Karna! What is this? 'Oh, nothing! Just a small insect bite!' "But Son, look at that! It is bleeding profusely!' "Oh that's all right, Gurudev! Let it flow, you may sleep. You were disturbed.' No Son! How can I sleep? How badly you are hurt!' Parashuram's heart was full of affection for Karna. He began to worry about Karna, but the next moment the feeling of vengeance lying within him was awakened. He thought that howsoever tolerant a Brahmin might be, he would not be able to tolerate to this extent. Only a Kshatriya and none else would have such tolerance. He was greatly disturbed and began to shake with anger, and roared, 'Tell me, who are you? Karna was scared. "This seems to be the end! I am caught. My tolerance has revealed my caste. Had I not tolerated, had I

Page #351
I am the Soul 701 picked up the insect and thrown it away, Gurudev's sleep would indeed have been disturbed. But he could have been asked to sleep again. But now what?' Parashuram asked again, his eyes burning with anger, 'Tell me, who are you? You are not a Brahmin. No Brahmin can be so tolerant. None other but the child of a Kshatriya would tolerate so much. Tell me, who are you? Come on, out with it.' Karna was shaking like a leaf. He was speechless. It was as if all his courage and bravery were lost. He somehow spoke up, "Gurudev! Please forgive me!' "Parashuram has never learnt to forgive! Come on tell me who you are!' "Pardon me, Gurudev! I a charioteer's son.' "What! Of such a lowly caste? You impersonated a Brahmin? You played a hoax on me, you blemished my body, and you took away my knowledge. You may go, but I curse you that your knowledge will let you down when you really need it.' Karna was shaken up. He began to sob. He did not even have the courage to hold the Gurudev's feet. His entire knowledge was plundered. Of what use is the knowledge that cannot be used when needed? Yet he was repenting his own folly, his own trickery. He stood with his head down, tears flowing from his eyes. Parashuram had a great affection for Karna. He was filled with unlimited love towards the latter. He was proud of his disciple. Karna's devotion, faith and dedication had overwhelmed Parashuram. He was hurt to the core that Karna had deceived him and tricked him into imparting knowledge. Yet the affection towards Karna was also there. He mellowed down and said, 'Son! Go away, go away quickly from here! On one hand there is my unlimited affection towards you and on the other there is the

Page #352
702 I am the Soul extreme anger. Son! I cannot digest this. Go away, Son, go away before I withdraw my curse. If I withdraw my curse, my brahmatva is dishonoured and if I get more angered then I might burn you down to ashes and I would then commit the sin of killing my disciple. Hence, Son, do not even delay for a moment and go away from here. Let this unfortunate Parashuram remain without a disciple. Go away!' Brothers! Without uttering a word, without saying anything, like a criminal Karna climbed down the hill and melted into the forest. Although he was retreating after a great defeat, the faith, devotion and respect he had for the Gurudev had not diminished even by an iota. On the contrary there was repentance in him that he had deceived such a benevolent Gurudev and hurt his feelings. The heart was weeping, not because he had lost the knowledge, but because he had hurt the Gurudev. History is witness that in the Mahabharata War, Karna had his chance while facing Arjuna, who was like the life of that war. It was just a matter of finishing off Arjuna, and victory would have been his. At just that moment, he forgot the art of archery and was mauled, defeated, and lost the war. Brothers! Karna was an ideal character of a disciple. How he was able to please the Gurudev! The Gurudev's heart had melted for him and he had imparted all his knowledge to Karna. But with the veil on Karna's deception getting lifted, this same Gurudev had set a curse upon him. Yet Karna's heart carried no malice towards the Gurudev. He did not think that Gurudev had done any wrong, but there was immense sorrow within him that he had hurt Gurudev. This indeed is true dedication. This is truly the nature of a disciple. This is indeed humility towards the Guru. Kabir has said that one who remains humble, who shows humility, that one alone can rise high in this world. But one should know how to be humble. Humility comes only when ego is thrown out, not otherwise. He says -

Page #353
I am the Soul UMcA UMcA sau koI cAle, nIcA na cAle koI nIcA nIcA jo koI cAle, sabase UMcA hoI rAma-rasa aisA hai mere bhAI, jo koI pIe amara ho jAI Humility comes only with the departure of ego and the humble alone can find a place in the heart of the Guru. An egoistic disciple may well be very brilliant, he may have the desire to acquire knowledge but he cannot find a place in the heart of the Guru. How can those who cannot find a place in the heart of the Guru, ever find a place in the world? 703 Such a humble disciple can call himself a pauper. In the gatha, the disciple says the same thing, 'O Gurudev! I am but a pauper. What ability do I have? But you are so infinitely benevolent that you have transformed an ineligible one like me into an eligible one. That you thought of me as eligible for your unlimited compassion, is in itself a great favour upon me.' Moreover, here the Gurudev has shown the path to moksa. He has helped overcome not just one birth, but the wandering of many births. Who would be so benevolent? That is why he expresses the greatness of Gurudev in the words 'Aha! Aha!' But now, how can the benevolence be recounted? With what parameter can such unlimited benevolence be measured? How can it be evaluated? That is why Srimadji has placed the exclamation 'Aha' twice to indicate that the benevolence of the Gurudev who has guided on the path that leads beyond the material world is superior to all other benevolences in this world. On a human, there is bound to be the debt of the parents or perhaps a financier. But that will be only for this birth. While Gurudev's debt wipes out births and all births that follow. He suggests such means that would enable avoid the necessity to be born again. Therefore, nothing can match the Gurudev's benevolence..

Page #354
704 I am the Soul The disciple is experiencing a feeling of awe under the unlimited benevolence of the Guru. Having already completely dedicated his own faith and devotion, he still finds something incomplete in it. So he is contemplating as to what could be offered at the feet of the Gurudev. Those thoughts of the disciple will follow.

Page #355
What shall I offer at the Prabhu's feet... As the jiva progresses in the devoted pursuit of the three gems, it goes on becoming more and more humble. It begins to realise the value of the benevolence of the benevolent more and more and its self becomes desirous of absolving itself of the burden of the benevolent one's debt. In practice, people experienced on the ethical path keep saying 'never forget any one's debt'. And how far do they go! Not even the debt of a person who has helped remove a thorn from your foot should be forgotten. So how can the benevolent Gurudev, who has helped you change the path in the spiritual field and brought the jiva that was on the wrong path from infinite time on to the right path, be ever forgotten? Niscaya Naya may well say that nobody can do anything to anybody, that a jiva can become a siddha after becoming free of all karma with its own ability. Yet without a proper motivation jiva cannot proceed on the path of progress. The biggest motivation for the jiva in its spiritual progress is that of the Sadgurudev. How can this be denied? The jiva certainly needs a guide to steer it. Of course, the steps on the path have to be taken by the jiva; the guide is not going to walk instead of it. But the jiva wandering in darkness does need someone to point the way. Think! Bahubali attained kevaljnana through severe penance. But had Emperor Bharat not motivated him, he would perhaps not have gone on the path of spirituality. Bahubali too had the desire for the Kingdom, which is why he was prepared for a war with Bharat. Had Bharat felt that, "I have already acquired a great kingdom. Bahubali is my own brother. He may as well enjoy his own kingdom', then Bahubali would not have performed such a penance to attain siddhi. The great motivation that took Bahubali on to the path of devoted pursuit was Bharat. Of course, it cannot be denied that the upadan indeed was his own.

Page #356
706 I am the Soul Thus every jiva finds some motivation or the other and as a result attains spiritual progress. Here the disciple has received the great motivation of the Sadgurudev. He is stating before the Gurudev that, you have been infinitely benevolent towards me. What had not happened since infinite time has happened now. I am desirous of freeing myself from the debt of your benevolence. But how can I? This is no material debt that I can repay with some material wealth. Moreover, one has to repay one's own debt. In practice, even a son may repay father's debt. But here that does not work. The urgency of repaying the debt of the Gurudev has arisen in the disciple and hence he says - zuM prabhucaraNa kane dharUM? AtmAthI sau hIna, a at yg surut, as arrunteta .....884 In appreciation of the unlimited benevolence of the Gurudev, the disciple is desirous of offering something at the feet of the former. What should I offer? What should I place at the feet? These are the thoughts nagging his mind. Brothers! It has been a tradition in our country. In the olden days the children of the Kings and Emperors used to go to the hermitages of the sages to learn the arts. After learning for years, when they would return with the permission of the Guru, they would offer something at the feet of the Gurudev and make a token effort towards absolving themselves of the debt. Here the disciple too is saying before the Gurudev, 'O Gurudev! You have transformed my entire life. I was ignorant like the mud lying in the mines. I had no value. You collected and shaped the mud. I was unaware that 'I am the soul'. You introduced me to the atma and illuminated my inner self. You gave a lamp in the hands of one who was stumbling in the dark. How can I repay your debt? Tell me, O Gurudev! What can I place at your feet?'

Page #357
I am the Soul Brothers! The ability of the sons of this land Bharat is unique and unparalleled. Perhaps such sons may never have been born in another part of the world. The gems that were created by the civilisation of this country are truly unmatched and unique. In this country, the disciple is so dedicated to the Gurudev that he will give without a second thought whatever the Guru demands. There is no hesitation. An anecdote from Indian history - Pandavas and Kauravas were learning the art of combat from Guru Dronacharya. At the same time a tribal boy was desirous of learning the art of archery and he came to Dronacharya. But the Acharya who was a staunch follower of the caste system refused to take on a disciple from the lower caste. The tribal boy was requesting humbly, 'Gurudev, please give me a place at your feet'. There is humility in his words, in his feelings. He prayed at the Guru's feet replete with emotions. 707 Brothers! Think! How high were the language and feelings in this boy born in a low caste! He was keen to learn an art that would be useful in material world, yet how humble he was! What conscience! When we go to our great Gurus to acquire some knowledge in the spiritual field, we can certainly say, 'Please offer me a place at your feet!' Or do we go thinking, 'I am somebody, I understand everything, my ability is special compared to others'? Unless this ego is removed, one cannot get the right to receive the knowledge that is within the Gurudev. Any effort without this right will not get any result. The tribal boy prayed humbly at the feet of Acharyadeva, but Dronacharya said, 'I am a Guru of Kshatriyas, I cannot become your Guru'. The tribal boy returned. There was a desire within to learn the art of archery. There was an insatiable thirst to learn. The one at whose feet he had gone to offer everything he had, had spurned him, and had called him a lowly person, yet the boy carried no anger towards him. He did not feel insulted.

Page #358
708 I am the Soul But he thought, "If the Acharya does not accept me as a disciple it is his choice, but I have already placed him as my Guru on my heart's throne. Whether he spurns me or accepts me, he is my only Guru.' And Brothers! The tribal boy went into the forest and built himself a hut. Outside the hut he himself sculpted and installed a statue of Dronacharya. Drawing inspiration from the Gurudev in the form of that statue he set about learning archery. Due to the pleasant feelings within him, the statue of the Guru too continued to inspire. In a short while he became an expert in that art. Some time later, Guru Dronacharya was visiting the forest along with his Kshatriya disciples. He saw an amazing feat. A barking dog had been silenced by seven arrows shot into its mouth. The dog had stopped barking but not a drop of blood had been drawn. The Guru and his disciples were awe-struck. Who could be such a great archer? They moved in the direction from which the arrows had come. There, standing with a bow in his hand, was a brilliant young boy of a dark complexion and a beautiful body that appeared to have been sculpted out of blackstone. The boy immediately fell at Dronacharya's feet. The Acharya asked him, "Who are you?"" "Lord! I am your own disciple!" "My disciple?" Dronacharya's ego was hurt. How can this forest-dweller be my disciple? He again asked, "My disciple? No, you cannot be my disciple at all!" "Lord! I am telling the truth. I had sought refuge at your feet several years ago. I had a yearning to learn archery but you had not accepted me. Yet I learnt this art with your inspiration alone."

Page #359
I am the Soul 709 "I have never inspired you! When did you come to me?" "Please come, Gurudev! I shall show you." The youth took him to where Dronacharya's statue had been installed, and said, "Lord! Look, this here is your image. I have learnt this art drawing inspiration from it!" Dronacharya and his disciples were wonder-struck. The Acharya thought, "What an effort I have put in for these Kaurava and Pandavas! Especially on Arjun among them. Arjun has become an archer, no doubt, but not like this fellow. This tribal youth has become such a great archer only with inspiration from a statue. Truly a great one! For a moment the Acharya was filled with affection for that young man. Having been taken as Guru without his knowledge and having inspired unknowingly, the Acharya was drawn to the youth with a feeling as if he were his own disciple. His heart was eager to pat the disciple's back with a feeling of appreciation. But Brothers! He was an Acharya immersed in the deep game of political intrigue. His thoughts quickly changed. "History should not record another archer comparable to Arjun in its annals'. The mind started conniving, and he said to the tribal youth, "Young man! Do you realise that you owe something to him, from whose statue you have drawn your knowledge?" "Yes, O Gurudev! I do realise. I am indebted to you for the infinite blessings you have showered upon me. I am prepared to do anything you say." "Will you not offer Gurudakshina?" "Of course, Gurudev! That goes without saying! I am prepared to give anything you say. All I have is at your feet. Even if my own life were to be sacrificed at your feet, it would not make up for the Gurudakshina. Tell me, Gurudev! Allow me to be fortunate enough to receive your orders."

Page #360
710 I am the Soul And Brothers! Dronacharya, owing to the attachment he had for Arjun, took the help of deceit and asked, "I do not need anything, just give me the thumb of your right hand." The tribal youth, with great pleasure and with laughter on his face, cut and placed the thumb of his right hand at the feet of the Guru. There was no anguish in him for even a moment. Brothers! That disciple was Eklavya. What did he offer? Everything he had! Howsoever expert an archer may be, his entire art depends on the right thumb! If that thumb goes then there is nothing left. Eklavya sacrificed his entire knowledge. Brothers! This is sacrifice! This is disciplehood! The Gurudev was being partial while making such 'a demand, yet Eklavya thought, "Let anything happen on his part, on my part I should give at the Guru's feet what he demands, without any hesitation. That is my dharma!' This situation is very thought provoking indeed! How far can the respect, honour, devotion and dedication towards the Guru be taken? Only as long as the Guru loves, pampers, calls the disciple his son, or remains favourable to the disciple? Or does the devotion-dedication continue even after being subjected to strict punitive lessons from the Gurudev, in spite of having sacrificed everything? Generally it so happens that as long as the Guru is favourable to the disciple, he is the Guru; otherwise a nobody. Just as it happens in your worldly interaction. If the parents are favourable to the children then they are "my parents'. But when they happen to come in the way of the children, then all relations are abandoned. The children dig their heels in and say they cannot get along. Brothers! This does not work in the field of spiritual pursuit. Unless and until a disciplehood like Eklavya is awakened, the eligibility to remain at the feet of the Guru or to get into sadhana does not occur at all. Only an eligible jiva can attain the atma.

Page #361
I am the Soul 711 That is why the disciple says here, "O Prabhu! What should I pay as Gurudakshina at your feet? No substance in the world seems worthy of this. If there is any valuable substance in this world, it is only the atma. Rest is all unworthy. While the joys attained through the senses, mind and intellect appear to me only illusions of joy, how should I describe the glory of the atma from which I attain bliss that is beyond all senses? Howsoever and whatsoever may be the joys of this material world, they are limited. Whether it is the supreme reign of the Chakravarti Emperor over the six continents or the happiness being drawn from the unparalleled strength of punya of the Gods residing in the Mahavimana with all their attainments, it is only an infinite part of the infinite bliss of my atma. Nothing more than that! I do not see anything more eligible than my own glorious atma, which could be offered at your feet." "Indeed, I may even place the atma at your feet, but even that is something you gave me. Did I know that "I am the soul?? Out of the infinite fixation I had the impression that body itself was the soul. You were benevolent, showering me with your benefaction, you introduced me to the atma, helped me realise it. As such, even this atma is what you have given me. Therefore, it is not my own. merA mujhameM kachu nAhIM, jo kachu hai so terA This is the case. There is nothing my own within me. Whatever is there is yours. Do I have the right to offer you that which is your own? But I do have to repay my debt to you. I have to offer you something. But I do not have anything. It appears that I cannot do anything else but accept servitude at your feet. You are dispassionate, free of aspirations. You do not aspire for anything from me, but my self has become eager to repay your benevolence. Therefore, it seems there cannot be anything but a feeling of total dedication at the feet. I shall conduct myself according to the orders of the refuge at your feet, through

Page #362
712 I am the Soul the triple yoga of my mind, speech and body. You have shown me the path of self-pursuit, which I shall tread. This will be my dedication. Thus the humble disciple accepts servitude of the Gurudev by offering at his feet, everything that he owns in the form of Gurudakshina. The disciple is aware of the saying that, jenA zaraNe jaie tenA jevA thaie 'You will become what your company is'. Therefore, to fully attain the glorious atma he accepts refuge at the Guru's feet. The disciple is not satisfied even with this. He feels his dedication is still short of the best. As a result, he desires to dedicate something more to the Guru. How his words express this feeling can be seen, a little later..

Page #363
Servant, I am but your servant... Srimadji has told us earlier that the jiva in the devoted pursuit of the three gems continues to walk the path indicated by the Gurudev, as long as he is in the state of a sadhaka, and continues his devotion towards the Gurudev even after he attains his goal. To a Sadhuka, in his inner self, Gurudev is everything. When a Sadhaka in the Indian tradition tries to evaluate the Gurudev with his inner feelings, he says gururbrahmA gururviSNu gururdevo mahezvaraH / guru sAkSAt parabrahma tasmai zrI guruve namaH / / If there is one Supreme Power in this Universe, it is encompassed in my Gurudev. Call it Brahma, Vishnu, Mahesh or the Parabrahma Supreme Soul, it is all encompassed in my Gurudev; nothing short of it. If somebody is valuing my Gurudev any lesser than this, then I do not want this person. Only I know the value of my Gurudev. The entire world is contemptible in his comparison. If somebody were to offer me the entire Universe in exchange for my Gurudev, it would be like dirt to me. Not even the pleasures of the heaven can compare that status. Not just that, an eligible disciple even goes to the extent of saying, 'I do not want the joy of liberation, if somebody were to offer me the same in exchange for my Gurudev'. This is devotion to Guru! This is dedication! This is faith! That is why here the disciple says, 'Gurudev! I have to offer you gurudakshina in repayment of the boundless benevolence that you have showered upon me. But what do I offer? I have nothing with me. Material things will not appease you. What is left, is my own atma. Even this is your own gift. How can I offer you this? Now, I shall just conduct myself in your servitude'. He tells us how he will conduct himself

Page #364
714 I am the Soul A dehAdI AjathI, varto prabhu AdhIna; ara, H, S GTA , he .....89EUR Now that I am avowed to dwell at your feet, I shall dedicate from today my body and everything to you. There is not a moment's delay in it. From today, from this very moment, not just my body - excepting its activities upon which I have no control - but also my senses, mind, intellect, awareness and everything else is at your feet. Not just that, whatever I have ever believed to be mine in this material world is all at your feet. Brothers! The question arises that a person may dedicate himself at the feet of his benefactor, but how can he dedicate his children and family or his property to which he alone does not have the sole right? The question is appropriate, no doubt but the answer too is similar. Only that person who has a total faith in his own wife, children and family can do so. This is an anecdote from the recent history of India - Raja Shivaji, the great courageous king of Maharashtra. His Guru was Swami Samartha Ramadas. The Guru was at the court of Shivaji, with his arms spread out seeking alms. Shivaji put a small scribbled note into his palms. He had written away his entire kingdom in favour of his Gurudev. Swami Samartha Ramadas was an ascetic. He said to Shivaji, "Shiva, what do I do with a kingdom? I am on the path of total renunciation, I do not want your kingdom." "No, Gurudev! I have given it away in alms to you. I do not want it now." "Shiva, I accept it! But now that your kingdom and all that is yours is dedicated to me, won't you do as I say?" "Certainly, Gurudev! Tell me. This Shiva is ready to anything. Should I cut off and offer my head at your feet? There shall be no faltering in the execution of your orders."

Page #365
I am the Soul 715 "Shiva! It's not your head that I want. But the responsibility of protecting this country and its culture rests on your head. Take this saffron cloth and rule the country under its watchful eye." Brothers! You know that this saffron flag flutters on Shivaji's forts. Even today the respect that this saffron flag begets is a gift of Swami Ramadas. This was Shivaji the true son of the earth, in this age. He showed history how the disciple-hood of a disciple should be. He not only dedicated himself, but his entire kingdom. This tradition also continues in the spiritual culture. Bhagawan Mahaveer had eleven ganadhars and they had 4,400 disciples. When the ganadhars dedicated themselves one by one, and accepted the disciple-hood of the Prabhu, their disciples too, who numbered 500 in one case and 400 in another, and 300 in yet another, dedicated simultaneously. Nobody waited to deliberate upon the issue or to ask anybody. When Indrabhuti and others dedicated themselves, along with them their disciples too bowed down at the feet of Mahaveer without a question. This is called total and absolute dedication. This is the true joy of life. Once, a brilliant young man approached Mahatma Kabir. After saluting him he said, "Mahatmaji! I have a serious question". "What is it?" "I know you. I have faith in you. You are capable of delving deep into the human mind and measuring its depths. That is why I have come to you. I am now grown up. I have to decide the direction for my life. So you please tell me, what should I do? Should I marry and settle down in householder's life or should I become an ascetic and accept the path of renunciation? Which of these two paths should I select?" Kabir thought, the youth looks bright and able. His question too is appropriate. So he should also get an appropriate reply.'

Page #366
716 I am the Soul He said, "Sit down, Brother!" Kabir was weaving cloth on the handloom. The work continued; it was midday and the Sun was at the hottest. Kabir suddenly asked his wife to bring along a lamp. When the wife came with a lamp he asked her to look for his shirt all around the house. The wife went all around the house with the lamp, but did not find the shirt. Kabir also made his son and daughter go through the same effort, but there was no shirt. The youth thought, "This saint is wonderful! First of all he orders a search with a lamp in broad daylight, and his wife and children sincerely go through the search. Secondly, the poor saint has but one shirt, which he is wearing. Yet he makes them look for it and they do so tirelessly and without a trace of grumble. It seenis difficult to say who is the fool -- Kabir or his wife and children'. Later as it turned towards evening Kabir took the young man to a hillock on the outskirts of the village. From the foothill he called, "Sir! Please come down!" After a couple of shouts the door to a hut on the hill opened and out stepped a very old fakir who seemed to be in his nineties. His body shivered, yet, just because Kabir had called, he slowly started climbing down using a stick for support. The hilly track was uneven and full of pebbles and thorns. Yet the old man came down slowly. After reaching the foothill, he saluted Kabir and asked, "Oh Mahatma! What can I do for you?" "Ah nothing, nothing really, Sir! Please go back! There is nothing to do." And the old man turned about immediately. It was just when he had reached the hilltop and entered his hut and before he could take any rest, Kabir called him again. And he came down the same way as before. This happened thrice and the old man climbed down and was sent back as there was nothing to do. The old man went away. Now the youth watched this with surprise. He was unable to understand Kabir's behaviour. He

Page #367
I am the Soul 717 had behaved similarly at home too, and now here. What is this? I don't understand a thing. Kabir was watching the youth's face. He knew that the young fellow's mind was all confused. He was perplexed. They returned, as the night advanced. Kabir asked the youth, "Well Brother! Did you get your answer?" The youth thought, "Answer, what answer! When has he answered? This was all a farce.' He said, "O Mahatma! You haven't answered my question yet." "Son! This was your answer." "I did not follow, O Mahatma! Would you please be kind and explain?" "Look Son! Your question was whether you should become a householder or an ascetic. If you have a confidence in yourself that you can adequately acquit yourself in the family life, that you can be an ideal householder, that you can generate a confidence in your wife and children to have faith in every act, and every decision of yours, only then should you become a householder. I asked my wife and children to light a lamp in broad daylight and look for my shirt, they never asked why there was a need for a lamp in daylight. They never countered that there is only one shirt, which I was already wearing, so where is the need to look for it. No! They thought that everything I say would be proper. They have implicit faith in me and believe that I would not get them to do such a thing without a proper reason. That is why they did everything joyfully and tirelessly. Brother! If you too possess the power to generate such a confidence in your wife and children in your married life, then do become a householder. You shall be happy." "You asked, "Should I become an ascetic?' We just saw the old fakir. I called him thrice down the hill, did not ask him to do anything, and sent him back, and yet no emotion showed on his

Page #368
718 I am the Soul face. His pleasant countenance did not disappear. Imagine such an old age when even taking one step is a big task, he was made to go up and down the hill in vain; how hurting it must have been for him. Yet he is an ascetic. He has attained equanimity. Whatever be the difficult time, he has learnt to control his self to the extent of not losing his balance. That is an ascetic." "Brother! I have placed both pictures before you. Now it is up to you to choose whether you want to be a householder or an ascetic. But mind you, only being such a householder or such an ascetic is meaningful life. Otherwise it is a difficult life." Brothers! The disciple remembers the benevolence of the Gurudev and is willing to offer everything including his life at the feet of the Gurudev. He is confident that when he dedicates whatever he has at the feet of the Gurudev, no one will say a thing against it; whether that one belongs to the family or is an outsider. This is old tradition of our country. Such has been the dedication of the noble sons of our country. Not just that, they affirm their slavery at the feet of the Gurudev. They don't say, 'Prabhu! I am your slave." They say, 'I am the lowest of your slaves.' The disciple's ego has melted away totally. It is all right to become the slave of the Gurudev, but here he is prepared to even become a slave of Gurudev's other slaves. "I am absolutely dedicated to you through the three yogas of mind, speech and body. My mind is not my own, but yours. It will think only as much as you desire. Even my speech shall be limited by what and how much you desire. An every activity that this body performs shall be subject to your order. There shall be nothing mine in my self. I am but your "poor' servant.' Brothers! Here "poverty' does not imply helplessness. "What can I do? I am powerless and I have no say here, therefore I have turned humble', this should not be the thinking.

Page #369
I am the Soul 719 What really happens to you, eh? You are like a tiger outside; one roar from you and hundreds shiver. But there is someone who can even make you shiver. Either it would be the Home Minister (your wife) or may be the Income Tax Officer. Where does one become 'poor and helpless? Only where there is powerlessness, not anywhere else. Since there is no powerlessness with Gurudev you will most certainly come here with all your vanity. You will like it only if the ego in you is fed, otherwise you will not even visit the saint. Think, Brothers! Where are you? Here, it is not so with the disciple. Here the humility has arisen out of the complete discharge of the ego. It is born out of the feelings of faith and devotion towards Gurudev. Seeking refuge at the feet of the Gurudev, you are to repair the infinitely old mistake, you are to avoid the wandering in the infinite, you are to attain the infinite bliss. None of this is possible without becoming humblest of the humble. And that is not just the superficial humility on display but the truly natural modesty arising from the depths of the inner self. The ego is all worn out. Moksa is possible only when ego goes, not otherwise. The disciple has such unwavering faith. Therefore, he has left his ego and is requesting that he be accepted as the slave of slaves at the feet of the Gurudev. He is placing the devotion-filled thoughts from his inner self at the Gurudev's feet. The disciple repeatedly recollects the benevolence of the Gurudev. He is, in fact, trying to express how the Gurudev has been benevolent. That shall be later ...

Page #370
You showed the difference... The mind of the sadhaka devotedly pursuing the three gems always remains immersed in the feelings of sadhana. Every aspect of sadhana invariably touches him. Among those are the feelings of devotion and faith towards the Gurudev. Here the disciple has expressed his own faith, devotion, respect to the Sadgurudev, and not just that, he has even dedicated everything he has; yet the memory of the great benevolence of Gurudev is not leaving his mind. He does not think, 'I have acquired a considerable lot. I have attained considerable selfdevelopment. Now I do not need anybody, so why should I repeatedly remember the Gurudev?' But he is constantly experiencing in his self, the immense benefaction that the Gurudev has bestowed upon him. His self is overwhelmed. Gurudev's benefaction is wonderful and out of this world. Thus the incessant thought-flow persists on recounting Gurudev's benefaction SaT sthAnaka samajAvIne, bhinna batAvyo Apa ; myAna thakI taravAravat, e upakAra amApa 127 O Infinitely Benevolent Gurudev! You have clearly shown that atma is different from all external feelings, external substances by logically explaining the six statements -- 'atma exists' etc. Keeping in view the Syadvada principle propounded by Bhagawan Mahaveer, you have properly explained the nityaanitya, karta-akarta, bhokta-abhokta states of atma. You have told how, indeed, the atma endowed with the specific uncommon characteristics and carrying the quality of chaitanya, is distinctly different from the animate substances. Not just that, you have also enabled me experience that the 'I' within me is itself the atma. I was struggling in the darkness of ignorance all this while, in the illusory belief that body itself is the atma. You have dispelled my ignorance and have brought me into the category.

Page #371
I am the Soul of the enlightened. How can I ever describe this great benefaction of yours? What other way do I have other than serving at your feet? The supremely benevolent Gurudev has shown the disciple struggling in ignorance, the path by gifting him knowledge. Therefore the disciple says - ajJAnatimirAMdhAnAM jJAnAMjana zalAkayA / mumilitaM yena tasmai zrI gurave namaH // 721 The blindness of the dark of ignorance was all-pervasive. The illusions regarding the world and worldly substances had occupied the mind from infinite times. I had never even felt in the dreams that 'the atma is my self and I am the soul'. The benevolent Gurudev applied the medicine of knowledge in my blind eyes. It was very difficult to absorb. To the jiva enjoying the bliss of ignorance, knowledge is bound to appear like sorrow. It will seem like an affliction that grows in the hurting eyes. But the compassionate Gurudev, with the feelings of motherly love, has applied the medicine of knowledge in the eyes of discernment. The grip of illusion of pudgal that was there due to ignorance began to loosen. It became clear that the happiness appearing to derive from the pudgal was merely an illusion of happiness and the veils before the eyes began to dissolve. Closed eyes opened; the light of knowledge spread and in that was seen the infinitely brilliant self- atma. I repeatedly bow at the feet of the Gurudev who has bestowed upon me such great benevolence. The disciple was clear about the bheda-vijnana visavis body - atma, karma - atma, attachment etc.- atma, affected disposition - natural disposition etc. He has experienced the absolutely independent and unattached atma. He says, 'Even a rustic fellow knows that the scabbard hanging from the King's waist is not just a scabbard but that there is a sharp-edged blade in it which is independent of the scabbard itself. In fact, even if the scabbard.

Page #372
722 I am the Soul is made of gold and has been bedecked with jewels, it has no value. It is merely a decorative piece. Similarly, however beautiful a body may be, it has no value. In due course of time, the animate substance atma of unthinkable power, which resides in the body, will abandon it and go away. Then the body is bound to turn into ash. It has to meet the dust. Aha! Look at the unique strength of the atma. So long as it remains in the body, the body's beauty, build and healthiness remain. And from the very next moment that the atma leaves the body and goes away, it begins to deteriorate. That is why, the body has no value, the atma does. The scabbard has no value, the blade does. mola karo talavArakA, par3A rahana do myAna The scabbard may very well be dropped, but do evaluate the blade as to how sharp it is. Learn how useful it is. Whatever may be the specie or type of the body, it may well be big or small, it may well be beautiful or ugly; that is of no significance. Recognise the infinitely knowledgeable and blissful atma that resides in it. Thus Gurudev helped recognise the infinitely strong atma, and simultaneously explained its form through the principle of Syadvada and showed the means of its liberation. Gurudev's explanation of the path of moksa in the form of samvar and nirjara is also his immense benevolence. The jiva begins with dharma after the onset of samvar. Of them, the first samvar is the seed of knowledge - samyag darshan. Only when samyagdarshan arrives, does mithyatva, in the form of asrava from infinite time, leave. As long as there is mithyatva, the journey of dharma does not begin. The virtues of good conduct and principles can inculcate into the life. The jiva can even begin to pursue the path. But that journey of dharma which gradually elevates the jiva on the steps of spiritual progress cannot begin at all.

Page #373
I am the Soul 723 Here Gurudev has not only defined the six statements but also led the disciple by the finger on to the path of dharma whereby his progress will now advance. When the asrava of mithyatva stops and the samvar of samakit appears in a jiva, it develops such a tremendous strength in the effects of the atma that it attains moksa in that life itself. And even if there is a growth or decline in these effects, the jiva's moksa is a certainty. Here the Gurudev has handed over to the disciple, the visa to attain moksa. "Go, Son! Be victorious!' Now nobody can stop him from reaching moksa. The flight may be today or tomorrow, but the destination is bound to be reached. Brothers! Even in material life, you do not forget someone who has been so benevolent to you; then in spiritual life, how can you ever forget the benevolence of the benefactor Gurudev who has broken the bondage of several rebirths? Therefore, the disciple has repeatedly recounted the benevolence of the Gurudev. The previous four gathas are in the form of extreme devotion. In the entire Atmasiddhi Shastra there are several references to Jnanayoga and Charitrayoga, and there are also references to faith and dedication towards Gurudev in the initial gathas as well as in the description of atmarthis. But these four gathas display the supreme state of devotion of the disciple. Merely singing praises or eulogies of Prabhu or Gurudev does not make up for devotion. Those are merely momentary feelings. They may even become appeasement to the sense of hearing. True devotion is that where there is total dedication in the refuge at the feet of Gurudev or Arihant. An inscrutable, insatiable craving for dedicating everything; where nothing own remains of the self. When pride is totally discharged and ego is dissolved, it is called devotion. After singing some devotional songs, a feeling occurs in the mind that I alone am capable of devotion. What does anybody

Page #374
724 I am the Soul else know about devotion? That is ego. And that ego does not let the true devotion arise. That is why the disciple has shown here his total 'poverty'. In his poverty he has accepted to become the slave of the Sadguru. Until here in Atmasiddhi Shastra, the joyful expressions of the disciple after the dialogue between the Guru and disciple were stated. Now in the following gathas Srimadji makes the epilogue and gives us some advice, which needs to be absorbed. What that is will be unravelled as we proceed further ...

Page #375
There is no illness like illusion of atma ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems enables us experience the purity of the atma that is far removed from all. To one who has experienced the atma, to him the experience of supreme atma is bound to occur. The ultimate attainment of devoted pursuit is the state of parmatma. After having shown the path in Atmasiddhi Shastra for transforming from atma to parmatma, Srimadji now summarises this Shastra - darzana ghaTe zamAya che, A SaT sthAnaka mAMhi, faarai fatiheit, Fine T Taig .....886 A very detailed description of the six statements of 'atma exists' etc., has been made in this Shastra. Keeping the opinions of various philosophies on subjects like atma etc., in view, several doubts were raised through the disciple. Gurudev clarified those doubts from a conciliatory viewpoint. Therein he explained with logic as to how the expectations of various other faiths could become acceptable to the Jain philosophy through certain Nayas. All the six statements have been accepted in various other faiths in one way or the other. There is certainly a small difference here and there, yet the fundamental principles have been accepted by all. Of course, many of the beliefs of several philosophies are of a rigid nature with a unique stand. While the Jain philosophy looks at, examines and considers all the principles in the world and the atma with anekanta (multiple) viewpoints. Thus the Jain philosophy, by having multiple viewpoints, proves its magnitude. Just as the ocean does not spill over in spite of receiving all the water emptied into it by all the rivers, and remains calm as ever, Jain philosophy also absorbs all rigid ekantavadi - philosophies within itself. Any person, who dispassionately studies these six statements, will not fail to find the principles of all six

Page #376
726 I am the Soul philosophies in them. Such is the wonderful and unique nature of these six statements. Now Srimadji says while explaining where the jiva makes the first mistake - AtmabhrAMti sama roga nahIM, sadguru vaidya sujANa, TF 3F11 74 494 Tat, steg faers &1 ....888 Can there be a greater mistake than the self not recognising itself? In the infinite world the jiva has not recognised itself. It is as if it has forgotten that "I am the soul or perhaps it has accepted the body as the self. This, Srimadji describes as the greatest illness - leprosy. When does leprosy strike? When the immunity of the body reduces. This body has the strength to fight all the maladies that come from outside. When some virus tries to create illness in the body, the body's immune system fights it and destroys it. Then the virus cannot do anything to the body. But if this immunity gets weakened for some reason, then it does not take long for the body to be attacked by illnesses. In the same way, the jiva has a great strength to fight the viruses of mithyatva etc. The strength lies within itself. But the overpowering attachment - moha has weakened this strength. That is why the atma cannot fight the passions and the maladies begin to grow. Nobody likes to remain sick. Everybody loves the state of good health. Therefore, first of all the illness has to be identified. That is to say, it needs to be diagnosed. It is necessary to find an experienced Doctor for a proper diagnosis. The body needs to be placed in his care. Brothers! You need to find the most experienced and best Doctor for the illnesses of the body. You have to go and give him every detail, every symptom without hiding anything, so as to get a perfect diagnosis.

Page #377
I am the Soul 727 The atma is afflicted by the illness of self-illusion. It is stuck in mithyatva. As such, first of all it is necessary to seek refuge at the feet of the Sadguru, who has himself realised the atma. Not just that, even the Sadguru was earlier afflicted as we are. He has also suffered the agony of mithyatva and then freed himself from it to attain samyaktva. He has experimented on himself. Its not as if he has learnt by merely working in external laboratories or by simply reading the scriptures. A doctor who treats the maladies of the body would have learnt through external experiments, reading or through others' experiences. He would not have experienced all the illnesses within his body. As such, he may be very experienced no doubt, but he cannot have experienced himself. While in the spiritual path, it is a great advantage that the Sadguru, at whose feet one has to go to get rid of the illness of mithyatva, was himself a sufferer earlier. He took the medicine and cured himself. Therefore, there will not be any shortcoming in the advice and instructions that come from him. From his own experience he will tell you what the illness is and what the medicine should be. In fact, he has even experienced the joy of being healthy. He has a true awareness of the joy of the atma which comes with the diminishing illness of mithyatva and the attainment of the healthy state in the form of samyaktva that is the original disposition. That is why he has been called 'sujan in the gatha. To such a knowledgeable Gurudev, let us hand over the own self without any reservations. Let us declare before him every thought that arises inside us. Let us open up our state of ignorance and he will immediately diagnose us and say, "You have nothing else but the great illness of mithyatva. Your atma has forgotten itself. The great impurity called mithyatva has manifested itself in the atma and as a result all the sorrows of the material world have arisen. Try as you may, to remove these sorrows, much as

Page #378
728 I am the Soul you would try physiotherapy, the illness of mithyatva that is within will not go. Until the atma realises that it is itself a dispassionate atma in the form of satchidananda, the other sorrows will not go away. Therefore, the jiva has to first strive to attain samyaktva, through which mithyatva will automatically get dispelled. After an illness is diagnosed, two things- namely medicine and diet, are equally important. If there is only one of the two, the illness cannot be cured. Both have to be administered in a balanced way. If you were to take the most advanced medicine, and simultaneously do not control your diet, the medicine can sometimes act like poison. The illness can aggravate and lead to death. Therefore, diet is a must. On the other hand, if you only regulate your diet and do not take medicine, even that is not right. Perhaps the illness may get contained but it cannot be uprooted. Here Srimadji first indicates diet and then medicine. He says guru AjJA sama pathya nahIM Some jivas tend to act on their own volition in trying to remove mithyatva. That is why an experienced poet has said -- harinuM nAma rasAyaNa seve, paNa jo pathya paLAya nahIM to tenuM phaLa leza na pAme, bhava rogo kadI jAya nahIM . If you always keep taking the elixir of Prabhu's name, but do not follow the diet that needs to be followed in life; if you do not distance yourself from the flaws then that elixir will have no result. The illness in the form of the material world, which is affecting the jiva, cannot be removed. Hence, it is imperative that diet be followed along with the elixir. Here Srimadji first mentions diet and then medicine. guru AjJA sama pathya nahIM

Page #379
I am the Soul 729 To remove the illness in the form of mithyatva, if the jiva acts on its own volition, plans its own treatment and disregards the orders of the Guru, then the illness does not get cured. That is why, Srimadji first places a condition before giving the medicine - 'Are you willing to follow the diet? Only then will you get the medicine. Not otherwise.' Brothers! Only Gurudev's directions can show the jiva the path. It can stop the self-indulgence. Srimadji has very well described the greatness of a Sadguru in the initial gathas of this Shastra. The mithyatva thinking of the jiva, which has come from infinite time, cannot be removed without seeking refuge with the Sadguru; without following his directions. The jiva has to first arrive at a decision within that 'iny welfare is in dedicating my entire life at the Gurudev's feet and upholding every order of his. Without this the illusion of my atma will not be dispelled. I shall not be able to understand the propriety of things. I shall not be able to experience the chaitanya atma. And now that I have found refuge with the Sadguru, I shall not return without realising the atma. In the infinite material world, the other associations I found led to material pleasures, but they all turned out to be only illusions of happiness. They could not remove the impurity of the atma. Therefore, now I have to seek refuge at the feet of the Gurudev and attain the pure state of the atma after removing all impurities'. A person with such a firm resolve about the self will certainly get noticed by the Sadguru. And then that person will take the medicine offered by the Guru. What is the extent of dedication required in a disciple while following the directions of the Gurudev, so that he becomes eligible for taking the medicine? Our grand Guru Tapasvi Sri Pujya Manekchandji Maharaj Saheb, had taken refuge at the feet of Pujya Fakirchandji Maharaj in Rajasthan, for acquiring knowledge. Before passing on

Page #380
730 I am the Soul knowledge, Pujya Fakirchandji Maharaj would repeatedly test the eligibility of this young Sadhu. On one such occasion he passed such an order, about following which even a Sadhu would be hesitant. The Guru asked for a certain item placed on a shelf in the room inside, to be brought out. Pujya Manekchandji Maharaj went in and picked up that thing, which turned out a green - sacheta - harda fruit, and brought it to the Guru. The Guru merely ordered for that fruit to be placed back where it was. Pujya Tapasviji Maharaj went back, left the fruit back where it was and returned to be immersed in his own studies. Not days but months passed but there was no doubt in Pujya Manekchandji Maharaj's mind. Ultimately, Pujya Fakirchandji Maharajsaheb asked one day, "Tapasvi! I have been waiting that you might ask me today or tomorrow. How come you have not asked?" "What, Gurudev?" "Several days ago, I made you bring out a fruit from inside. You brought it, and I sent it back. You left it in there. But you never asked me." "Gurudev! What should I ask?" "Why! That was a green - sacheta - fruit. First of all a Sadhu is prohibited from touching any sacheta thing, and I asked you to bring it. Moreover, there was no need but I made you touch it. Did it not occur to you as to why I made you do this unthinkable deed?" "No, Gurudev! It is not my look-out to think about what that thing was or why you called for it. I merely had to follow your orders. Why should I think as to what for and why the order was? Such a doubt would arise in me only if I had no faith in your ability, not otherwise. I am glad, on the contrary, that you found me worthy of taking your orders."

Page #381
I am the Soul 731 Brothers! Pujya Fakirchandji Maharaj was pleased to the core to see such dedication and obedience in Pujya Tapasviji Manekchandji Maharaj and gave him the essence of philosophy in return. This faithful obedience is the following of diet. The stage after this is the auSadha vicAra dhyAna The state of thinking is the first step for the jiva. It is essential that the jiva first think about the true form of the self and the world. The constant demand of the jiva is for indestructible happiness. The natural disposition of jiva is happiness. That is why jiva desires happiness. No jiva will ever yearn for sorrow. Indeed, nobody likes to die, but living forever is dear to them; why so? The soul is eternal. It does not die, therefore jiva's demand is also for deathlessness. And thirdly, the jiva does not like impermanent substances or relations. It always desires the permanence of substances and relations. The reason for that too is the true form of jiva being eternal. The atma cannot be destroyed. Thus the jiva's demand is for eternal happiness, indestructability, deathlessness and permanence. This indicates that the jiva desires to be the same as its true form. But it does not know as to how its own desire can be fulfilled. It does not know from where it can get what it desires. Therefore, it tries to search all this in the pudgal but as a result gets disappointed. The sages have seen this state of the jiva and ordered that the jiva should do anupreksha - vicharana - introspection - contemplation; the jiva should feel the feelings. That is why in the Baraha Bhavana - Twelve Thoughts - the very first thought is that of impermanence. By dwelling upon this thought the jiva becomes aware that it is by itself a permanent - eternal chetan substance. And that pudgal is the impermanent substance. The relation with an impermanent thing will always be impermanent.

Page #382
732 I am the Soul That which is impermanent by itself, can never offer permanent happiness. Thus, the illusion that there is happiness in pudgal gets dispelled. And thereafter, as it contemplates over the impermanence, one by one it begins to realise that the feelings of attachment etc. that occur in a jiva are impermanent, the relation that a jiva builds with the micro - sukshma and macro - sthula body is impermanent and ultimately the jiva stumbles upon the permanent chidrupa atma, stabilises in it and then all impermanent thoughts disappear. Thus, the contemplation over feelings of impermanence etc., ultimately leads the jiva up to its own pure true form. And then the jiva stabilises in its dispassionate supremely pure true form. That is dhyana - meditation. Thus first there is the state of vichara - thinking and then there is the state of dhyana. The state of thinking is so potent that it can prove the atma to be different from everything and make it realise its state of detachment. This realisation makes the atma to stabilise in working over itself. The transitions of the anantajnana that resides in the atma are infinite and of these one is the dhyana of the pure true form of the self. When such a state of dhyana arises, the mithyatva residing in a jiva begins to disappear. The illness goes away. The jiva attains the state of samyaktva. The jiva's immune strength to fight against other karmas also gets enhanced. 'I am not the body, but I am the soul this realisation begins to prevail. The atma comes out of the illusion of the self. Now, where this jiva, which has come out of the illusion, gets stuck, and what is the jiva's duty to rectify that error will be told later ...

Page #383
Do not name the state of life... The devoted pursuit of three gems rectifies the error of infinite times and makes one understand the truth. Those who are able to come out of the illusion of the atma, get on to the path of a tremendous effort-purushartha. There is no attainment without purushartha. Awakening the jiva, and inspiring it to perform purushartha, Srimadji says jo iccho paramArtha to, karo satya puruSArtha, bhava sthiti Adi nAmalaI, chedo nahIM AtmArtha 130 If there is true desire to attain the supreme, then there has to be a proper effort for it. Foremost should the consideration whether there is a desire or not. If one is tired of the wandering through bhavas and strongly wishes that one does not want the material world anymore, then the enthusiasm to make the effort for atma arises. It is also said jyAM cAhatyAM rAha Where there is a will, there is a way! If there is a desire, the path can certainly be found. What can happen if the desire is for the material world and words merely express the topic of moksa? Only material world will be found, not the path of moksa. Most people do not have a strong inner desire at all. What is more, they say, 'What do we do? We do want moksa, and nothing but moksa. But in the present era there is no moksa, therefore we cannot even make the effort'. 'How can the search for atma arise in such adverse times? How much these mohaniya and other karmas bother? The period itself is such that the reasons for increasing mohaniya will be available but not to reduce it. Indeed, where is the true Sadguru today? These are all adverse situations. We are born in such.

Page #384
734 I am the Soul difficult times. This is the Hunda Avasarpini period; what for should we discuss moksa at all?' Behind all these excuses is the absence of a strong desire. Otherwise, the path cannot remain hidden. This period may well not have a scope for moksa. Nevertheless, who stops you from making all possible - aradhana - devoted pursuit? The result of aradhana is such that the more you do the more profit you are in to. Whatever aradhana you accomplish in this life, whatever purification of atma you attain out of it, to that extent you will be saved an effort in the later births. Therefore, aradhana never goes waste. Many jivas are stubborn in their opinion. They are under the impression, 'when our opportune time arrives, we will automatically do the effort and go on to moksa. Whatever number of births we are destined to go through, we will have to, won't we? When our time for remaining in bhavas that is remaining in this material world is up, when the time is ripe, we will get on to the right path. Those who carry this belief are in a great illusion. Nothing ever happens only because the time is ripe. Purushartha is essential; it is imperative. Even for the time to ripen, purushartha is inevitable. Many people leave everything to krama baddha paryaya - sequentially bound transition, and sit down with folded hands. "There is no need to do anything now. When our state of omniscience is due, it will certainly happen. When our accomplishment is due, it will certainly happen. Everything will happen as has been decided in the knowledge of the sages. There cannot be a change in it'. Brothers! Agreed that what has been seen in the knowledge of the sages is proper. That is how it will happen. Nevertheless, the question is, did anybody go to the sages and ask, "Prabhu! My number of births is predetermined. There is moksa at the

Page #385
I am the Soul end of those births. But will this all happen without purushartha? Or do I have to make the effort?' Think! Bhagawan Mahaveer's atma was present in the times of the first Tirthankar Adinath in the form of his grandson. Bhagawan Adinath had declared then that the grandson would be the twentyfourth Tirthankar of this period. This was a certainty. In spite of that, what a great amount of effort Prabhu Mahaveer had to put in, in his later births! Moreover, not just that! In the very birth in which he was to be the Tirthankar, when it was certain that he would be the Tirthankar, when it was certain that he would become Veetarag, when it was certain that he had the most superior body, when it was certain that he would attain moksa, why did he have to perform such severe penance of twelve years and thirteen fortnights? Why did he suffer torture and disturbances? He was enlightened and knew that he was bound to attain moksa. Moreover, he was a prince. Would he not have attained moksa had he remained enjoying the pleasures of the kingdom? Why! Mother Marudevi was riding the royal seat on an elephant when she attained kevaljnana and then moksa. If Bharat could attain kevaljnana in his palace of mirrors without even becoming a Sadhu, without making any effort, then why wouldn't Mahaveer attain? Why did he have to suffer so much? Brothers! That was Mahaveer's destiny. He had to suffer so many karmas. He had to perform the purushartha to remove so many karmas. All this was due. That was the reason he did not attain kevaljnana in the palace. 735 That is why it is said in the gatha, that you should not remain idle under the excuse that moksa will be attained when the state of births is completed. For, no work is accomplished unless all of its five causative elements are available. Of course, in some cases, one element may be important than the others; that is possible. But only when all five causative elements leading to a work are in equilibrium that the work can be done.

Page #386
736 I am the Soul In the Jain tradition, five causative elements - samavaya karana - have been recognised. 1. Kala - 2. Swabhava 3. Bhavitavyata 4. Karma, and 5. Purushartha There are so many activities in the world where only time appears to be working. To all appearances, it seems as if only the ripening of time has led to the work being done. Nevertheless, in those cases time is the predominant causative element while the other four are there to a lesser extent. However, they are certainly there. Certain activities where time is the predominant causative element: a baby conceived in a woman's womb will be delivered only at its right time; neither earlier nor later, and if it does it will be an exception. If a seed is sown for a tree, it will germinate only after it has taken its time, never earlier. Similarly, if you plant a mango seed today, you cannot get fruit in the same year. Many seeds germinate immediately. If you add curds to milk, it will curdle only in good time, not immediately. All six seasons will appear only in their proper time. If you want winter in summer or spring in autumn, they will not appear; the seasons will come only when their time does. Why! Even for a supreme soul like the Tirthankar who possesses infinite strength, death does come at a destined time. It is merely a moment, but death can never deviate. In our own history there is this anecdote about Bhagawan Mahaveer that the Bhasmagraha was to set in after his liberation. Indra became aware of this, came to Prabhu and requested thus, "Prabhu! Bhasmagraha is about to set in. Please extend your life by two

Page #387
I am the Soul 737 ghadis (48 minutes)! If the graha sets in during your lifetime, then there shall be no calamity befalling the Jain religion. But if it sets in after your liberation, then Jain religion will have to suffer a lot. dharma will be the loser!" Mahaveer replied, "O Indra! What are two ghadis? I cannot increase my life even by a moment. It is not something in my control. Time is bound to do its job." Brothers! Prabhu could not increase his life even by a moment. Death came at the appointed moment. Therefore, in all these acts we see the importance of time. The second causative element is swabhava - original disposition. The original disposition of a substance remains as it is. There cannot be a change in it. Why doesn't a moustache grow on a woman? Why doesn't hair grow on the palm? That is their original disposition. Similarly why doesn't a lime tree bear the mango fruit or the mango tree bear a lime? Both may well be growing next to each other, they may well be watered, fertilised in equal measure, they may get the same air and light, yet the mango tree will only bear a mango and so does the lime tree bear only a lime. Why is the peacock feather so colourful and artistic? Who painted it so beautifully? Why are the thorns of the berry bush more pointed than any other? Why are mountains immobile and the wind mobile? Why does the Sun rise only in the east and set only in the west? All these questions can be replied in one word and that is 'swabhava' - original disposition. Every substance has its own original disposition. Third causative element is bhavitavyata - destiny. As be the destiny, so shall happen. When the mango tree flowers, it is full of them. However, many flowers wither away and only some grow into mangoes. Why not all flowers grow into mangoes? Why are some mangoes sour and some sweet?

Page #388
738 I am the Soul We get to meet such situations, things or people of whom the mind might never have thought, might never have desired, and what it might have thought never happens. Why is it so? A person in war, surrounded by enemies, under attack from all directions, returns home unscathed while another dies of heart failure right in his seat at home. Why! A person escapes alive from a major air crash, like our Morarjibhai, while another dies of a simple dash. In all these, the causative element is destiny. As be the destiny, so shall happen. Fourth causative element is karma. A person begets fruits commensurate with his karmas. The jiva has been wandering in the four gatis from infinite times. It is suffering the joys and sorrows of the material world. A great person like Rama had to spend fourteen years in exile and a staunchly faithful wife like Sita was branded unfaithful. Bhagawan Adinatha who had been born with unlimited punya, became the first Emperor and then the first Tirthankar. Yet after entering the ascetic order had to go without food and water for one long year. Mahaveer, in whose feet the three worlds should be dedicated, for whom the Devas and Indras stood in attendance, had nails driven through his ears by a forester. A princess like Chandanbala was sold as a slave on a city square. All these were caused by karma. A hungry rat entered a house and found a basket. He thought there was something in it to eat and began to chew through the basket. What emerged was an angry snake, which swallowed the rat. That is karma. The fifth causative element is purushartha - tremendous effort. Nothing is obtained without a tremendous effort. Sita was abducted. Ram had to make a tremendous effort and vanquish

Page #389
I am the Soul 739 Lanka before he could rescue Sita. Had Ram not done the effort, Sita would never have been rescued from the clutches of Ravana. There is oil in the sesame. However, that oil can be extracted only with the effort of crushing the sesame. A frail creeper climbs along a tree trunk and grows big. That is also through purushartha. Even practical life highlighting the importance of purushartha says, 'Little drops of water make a mighty ocean' and 'Little pebbles together raise a mighty wall'. Without purushartha once cannot earn wealth, knowledge, happiness, fame or success. Therefore, purushartha is essential for everything that you do. When all these five causative elements get together, a work is done. Something does not happen because of any one element. Of course, it is possible that of the five, one element becomes important and the other less so, but there never can be an absence of other elements altogether. Upadhyaya Sri Vinay-vijayji has said - e pAMce samudAya maLyA viNa, koI na sIjhe kAja . For example, cloth can be made from cotton yarn. That is its 'original disposition'. Only when the time is ripe for the yarn to be converted into cloth, does the weaving take place. There may be several reels of yarn in the warehouse. Of those, only the ones whose 'time' has ripened get to come out and are processed into cloth. Further, the cloth gets completed only if the thread has it in its 'destiny'. Otherwise, for some reason it remains incomplete. The machine might develop a snag. If some reels of yarn do not have it in their destiny, they will never get processed into cloth. The weaver needs to perform a 'tremendous effort'. If, in spite of all inputs being ready, there is no effort, then the cloth is not woven. Further, after the cloth is ready there has to be the 'karma' of the person who will enjoy it. If karma is missing,

Page #390
740 I am the Soul then the cloth remains lying with him, but he cannot use it. Thus, in this one cloth there are all the five causative elements. Similarly, in the growth of a jiva too, five elements are operative. Upadhyaya Vinay-vijayji says - niyati vaze haLu karamI thaIne nigoda thakI nikaLIyo, puNye manuSya bhavAdi pAmI sad gurune maLIyo, bhavasthitino paripAka thayo tava paMDita vIrya ullasiyo, bhavyasvabhAve zivagati pAmI, zivapura jaIne vasiyo, muit! Husaha ufa 4a 31101t, tu gania a arunt t .... The jiva stuck in the nigoda since infinite times manages to reduce its karma due to 'destiny' and emerges from the nigoda to progress through various life forms like the uni-sensory, bisensory, elementary penta-sensory etc. Thereafter, with rise of punya "karma' it manages to enter the human life form. It manages to locate a Sadguru, and gets to hear the scriptures. As this happens, with ripening 'time' in the state of life, its atma strengthens, i.e. the atma gets inspired to perform a "tremendous effort'. Ultimately, the greatness that resides within in the form of 'original disposition' leads it moksa. Thus, beginning the journey from nigoda unto moksa, through the involvement of all five causative elements, where sometimes one and at other times another is stronger, the jiva manages to attain its goal. Those who remain in the illusion that moksa can occur through just any one element, will never attain moksa. That is why, Srimadji has said here that one should not blame the state of life and abandon the devoted pursuit of the goal of the soul. Purushartha is inevitable. We are unaware of the quantum of purushartha that is further required of us. As we saw earlier, if a supreme bodied jiva like Mahaveer, who had come with the excellent eligibility of becoming Tirthankar, had to perform such a tremendous effort, then where do we stand? Therefore, without resorting to any excuses, if we awaken a strong

Page #391
I am the Soul 741 desire within ourselves to attain moksa and suitably perform the effort, only then will moksa be attainable. Here Srimadji has been indicating jiva's mistakes one after the other. So also he is freeing the jiva confused in one-ended beliefs, from its confusion and guiding him on the right path. Furthermore, the fact that it is not one-ended practice or one-ended determination that is beneficial for a jiva, but a balanced view of both, will be explained later ...

Page #392
It is certainly not the essence ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems is complete only when it is performed in both dravya and bhava methods; otherwise it remains incomplete. It is essential to understand dravya and bhava both in a proper complementary view. In the beginning of Atmasiddhi Shastra, Srimadji, through a reference to the mere intellectuals who believe in one-ended knowledge and one-ended activity and the ritualists, has told us that they both are misguided, under an illusion. A misguided jiva cannot reach the determined goal. A jiva on the path will have to be ever vigilant of the path itself. It may well be the path of material world or the path of moksa. Be it a narrow trail or a highway, one has to remain very alert so that the direction is not missed somewhere. A small mistake can put a southbound person on the track to the east. Thereby he begins to go farther away from his destination. Therefore, every step has to be taken with extreme care. A jiva on the spiritual journey should examine the path and only then step ahead and further be constantly alert that no step goes wrong. So that such alertness is constantly maintained, Srimadji warns the sadhaka jiva - nizcayavANI sAMbhaLI, sAdhana tajavAM noya, frary Trat TT, TT Cai HU.....838 The niscaya naya says that the atma is pure, intelligent, blemishless and formless. It is one, detached and unbroken. The atma in a Siddha, is like the one in all others. This opinion is not incorrect. From the view of absolutely pure niscaya naya, that is how the atma is. But in practice, so long as a jiva is in the material world, and has not yet become a siddha, it has to be identified through practical means. In spite of being pure-intelligent, blemishless and formless it is also tainted by karma, it is ignorant,

Page #393
I am the Soul 743 it has taken on some body form. It is associated with several jivas and several pudgalas. It goes through repeated births and deaths. That is why the atma gets identified as human or demigod. For a jiva in the material world to be identified, it has to be placed in one of the four life forms. In reality, the atma is not human, but the body it has worn is that of a human. In practice we make such usage of words - you may say a pot of water or a bottle of ghee. In reality, the pot is made from clay but since it has been filled with water, we called it a pot of water. The bottle is made from glass, but since it has ghee in it, it is called a bottle of ghee. Similarly, atma is atma. It is called a human because it has taken the body of a human. There are several such practicalities in life, which are merely for understanding. After understanding this the sadhaka atma has to consider that the atma in spite of being pure and intelligent, its present transitory state is impure. To purify it, to remove the stains of karma remaining on the atma, it is necessary to find some means. If the means are not activated, atma will never get purified. What are these means? The external activity that is done towards the goal of the pure soul, such as observing austerity, satsang, devoted pursuit of the three gems and so on. As the devoted pursuit progresses through these means, so does the purity of the soul. But there are several stubborn jivas who accept only that true pure form of atma as described by niscaya naya and insist that 'I am pure, detached and dispassionate. In my true form there is not even an iota of blemish, so why do I need restraint, vows and limitations, pratyakhyana etc.?' And such jivas become unrestrained. They do not inculcate penance, renunciation or restraint in their life and keep talking about moksa! Their life becomes perverted. Brothers! To a jiva, which has reached the determined goal, abandoning the means will not be very detrimental, because

Page #394
I am the Soul renunciation and restraint will have naturally occupied the life of a person who has already reached the goal. That person will not need to further enforce the vows of restraint. But a person who has not reached the goal cannot afford to let go of even one means. If he does so without realising, his state will worsen. 744 You are travelling to Mumbai from Chennai on a train. If you get carried away by the niscaya naya concept and feel that means are not essential, and so you alight from the train in the middle of the night in a forest, what would be your state? Well! Train is passable, but if you were in a plane and flying, and if you were to misunderstand that niscaya naya asks you to abandon means, and so you plan to give up the means that very minute and jump from the plane, would you reach the goal? Perhaps after that pall-bearers would be inconsequential! Think, Brothers! In practical life means are to be given up only when a determined goal has been reached. You are attending a wedding. You are bedecked with jewels and adorned with beautiful clothes. How long would you retain those? Only as long as you are in the wedding hall! So the moment you are out of the hall, would you remove everything or wait till you reached home? There are several such situations in life and our understanding works very well in them. Well, similarly in the spiritual field, unless the goal is reached no activity can be left out. Of the twenty-four Tirthankars, several had attained kevaljnana within two-three-four months of entering the ascetic order. They would have been aware of the imminence of kevaljnana at a certain time, then where was the need to give up their home and family and become ascetics? The superior atma in the superior body would have come with a great preparedness, yet they accepted the austere conduct. They went through the panchamushti locha - the pulling out of hair. They observed the mahavratas. They observed the activities of a Sadhu - travel etc. They did not miss out even one activity. Then how

Page #395
I am the Soul 745 can we, the ordinary jivas, merely being influenced by the niscaya naya concept, abandon vratas-niyamas and pratyakhyana saying 'we do not need all these because we are pure and intelligent'? Brothers! Forgive me! But many have so understood and go around convincing others that vratas-niyamas lead to asrava. But I want to ask them, if vratas-niyamas lead to asrava then what do avrata and unrestrained life lead to? Samvar? Which scripture says that samvar is possible through an unrestrainedunrestricted life? Just give it a thought! If vrata-niyama are properly observed, they become instrumental in the onset of samvar. The asrava of avrata goes away and the samvar in the form of vrata accrues. But if rola-niveama are not properly observed, then isn't the papa asrava held up? Just so that punya asrava does not occur, is it fair not to stop papa asrava? Brothers! That's a great misconception. If you follow this idea, and taking vrataniyama to be reasons for asrava tend to ignore them, then the stay in material world is bound to increase. Moksa is certainly there, but mind you, you will be drifting away from it. That is why, Srimadji says, means have to be sought towards the goal of niscaya. Never ignore any means. If the knowledge of niscaya is important, then so is the observance of activity. If you only understand niscaya and abandon the activity, it will be a mistake, so also if you forget the goal of niscaya while performing the activity, it will be a mistake. Therefore, for the purification of the atma, attachment and aversion have to be diminished and for that purpose vrata-niyama-samyama have to be observed. This Shastra has been composed for the proper understanding of these two. Srimadji says -- naya nizcaya ekAMtathI, AmAM nathI kahela; yahid Claer TET, as hre Tem.....83? gacchamatanI je kalpanA, te nahIM sad vyavahAra; 97 TEN FAST Fuj, a first the FIR . . . . .833

Page #396
746 I am the Soul Firstly, it needs to be stated that Srimadji was full of compassion upon seeing the sorry state of the jivas insisting on one-ended solutions. He has tied up the concepts of vyavahara and niscaya in Atmasiddhi Shastra in such a way that these jivas could understand the truth. Jain philosophy is multi-ended. Here the seven nayas have been broken down to seven hundred nayas and those further into infinite nayas. No naya has been ignored. If ignored it will be only an illusion of naya. Then the true and proper form of a principle cannot be understood. Atma has been discussed in this Shastra through two viewpoints involving naya. That is why Srimadji says that here, we have neither the oneended niscaya naya nor the one-ended vyavahar naya. But both have been explained in their proper form in their respective places. This vision of Srimadji is unique. He was englightened. He knew the thoughts of the pancham-kala. He was familiar with the psychology of today's humans. That is why he emphasised that those who insisted on ekanta were on the wrong path and is seeking to open their eyes. Indeed, he is trying to show us where those believing in vyavahar are mistaken in their vyavahar and those believing in niscaya are mistaken in niscaya. One of them is at fault firstly because he believes only in vyavahara and more so because he does not understand good vyavahara. In the same way, the other one is at fault firstly because he believes only in niscaya and more so because he is unaware of what proper niscaya is. Thus he very clearly expresses these beliefs prevailing in this our period. A jiva tends to believe that the customs and thinking of the school of thought - gachcha or sect - sampradaya to which he belongs are the vyavahar. However, where there is stubborn insistence, that vyavahar is not pure. There is an insistence that dharma is possible only through the observance of those

Page #397
I am the Soul 747 belonging to their own school of thought. Whether swetamber or digamber, Sthanakwasi or murtipujak or terapanthi, they all keep insisting that only those observances performed by our group are the ones propounded by the Prabhu. This is the only order of the Jina, there is none other. That is why we are the only ones in the right, rest are all wrong?. Thus, every upstart sect that comes in these days insists that the true principles rest only with it. Do forgive me, Brothers! But even within one sect the followers have formed groups and insist that what they know is not known to anybody else. The way in which they perform their pujas and sing the praises is the right way, and the others do it wrong. What do we call those people who spread such misconceptions, where in the name of the Lord they pray to, they create rift among themselves, insist on their own way and harbour enmity towards others? Remember! They too are misguided. Whatever they may say, but their vyavahar is false and their niscaya too is false. Truly in this age, we miss the sages. That is our biggest misfortune. Srimadji says the difference between the enlightened and the ignorant is just this - TESHT ata Fritsig visa Tet... ajJAnIne matabheda karatAM vAra lAgatI nathI / Vyavahar is not the insistence upon proving that one's own concept is the only true one, while getting involved with such differences. Vyavahar, the true good vyavahar is the purushartha - the tremendous effort that is made towards awakening that state in the jiva necessary for attaining the niscaya. For that purpose, in this very Shastra, Srimadji has earlier spoken about "pacification of the passions and so on. That state, when it appears in the jiva, is sadvyavahar. Similarly, what is niscaya? The experience of the body is not the same as that of the atma. Niscaya is not merely a verbal

Page #398
748 I am the Soul statement, made without really attaining the means such as detachment, claiming that "I am the atma in the true chaitanya form, absolutely unattached, pure and intelligent'. The state of niscaya is a state arising from experience. It may be said that only the one who has experienced one's self has partially attained niscaya. When one inculcates these five qualities: sama, samvega, nirveda, anukampa and aashta into one's life activities, then one is said to have made niscaya the goal. Well, otherwise, there is only tall talk and vyavahar is nowhere to be seen in life. Many years ago, I had met a brother in Mumbai. There was some topic being discussed about the customs of sadhus and their interaction with the society. He asked, "Mahasatiji! Are there such activities in the field of atma?" I asked him, "Brother! Sadhu is sitting in the middle of the society. There is some give and take relation with the society. If one wants to escape this contact, one will have go away into the forests like Anandghanji Maharaj. Until such time as that cannot be done, whether it is liked or not, such interaction will have to continue. But, tell me! You know so much about niscaya, can there be a business where you have to do hanky-panky in the field of atma?" He was silent. Brothers! Everyone likes to engage others in talk. However, when faced with reality their true colours are laid bare. Pursuit of dharma is not a pastime. It is not a child's play. It is a game of blades. It is easy to bring in niscaya into talk, but experiencing and realising the self is the difficult part. Those who have centred their life activities on the self, their life is simply wonderful. All the activities of life have to be maintained, but there is a propriety in them. This is an anecdote from the life of Srimad Rajchandraji as a merchant. He used to be a Jeweller in Mumbai. Once he entered into a transaction for pearls with an Arab. The Arab then went to

Page #399
I am the Soul 749 his own shop and told his elder brother about the transaction. The elder brother was very upset and told the Arab that it was a loss-making transaction and that was not the way to do it. The younger brother was afraid and did not know what to do. He hesitantly rushed back to Srimadji's shop with a sad face. Since he could not say a thing, Srimadji asked, "What is it, Brother?" "Raichandbhai! I just concluded a deal with you and went back. But my elder brother is not agreeable to it. We will be the losers in it." "Aha! Why should it bother you so much? Bring me the note" So saying Srimadji took the note from the merchant and tore it off. "Go now, you are not bound anymore! Raichand drinks milk, not somebody's blood.' Brothers! He pulled the Arab merchant out of a difficult spot. In doing so, he gave away the profits he would have made. Think this over! He was a merchant. He too had a large family to look after. He had not entered the ascetic order, but his aim was to realise the soul. He had not learnt to amass wealth by hurting somebody. I want to ask you, how really are the lives of those who propagate the niscaya naya and talk about the atma? How many of them do hanky-panky business, and collect money by drawing blood from others? And how many of them offer peace to all others through compassion and love? Or is the equation such that dharma is dharma and business is business? Brothers! Unless there is dharma in your business, you do not have the right to discuss the atma. Therefore, those who really want to attain the soul, will have to bring in saintliness in their life.

Page #400
750 I am the Soul Here Srimadji has presented vyavahar and niscaya from a complementary viewpoint. The goal of the soul is attainable only if there is devoted pursuit in the direction of niscaya after properly understanding good vyavahar and niscaya. Now, what a good fruit does jiva's purushartha get him, will be told later ...

Page #401
There have been sages before ... This devoted pursuit of the three gems awakens the state of complete knowledge. Being knowledgeable is the characteristic of the atma. All that is worth knowing is reflected in the atma. Knowledge is a mirror and all that is worth knowing is the reflection that is visible in the mirror. That is how atma knows all animate and inanimate substances. There is infinite power of knowledge in the atma. However, in a jiva in the material world, this power lies suppressed. The jnanavarniya karma has shrouded this power. As and how this shroud of karma begins to weaken, the power of knowledge emerges stronger. Since knowledge, in spite of being unique in the true form of knowledge, progresses gradually, and furthermore, since there is a difference between subjects and means, Sri Prabhu has mentioned five categories of knowledge in the Sri Nandi Sutra - nANaM paMcavihaM pannattaM, taMjahA-AbhiNIbohiya nANaM, suyanANaM, ohinANaM, maNapajjavanANaM kevalanANaM / 1. Abhinibodhamatijnana 2. Shrutajnana 3. Avadhijnana 4. Manahparyavajnana 5. Kevalajana Matijnana and Shrutajnana are earned with the help of five senses and the sixth source being the mind. Firstly, Matijnana is that which is absorbed through five senses and the mind and remains formed in the intellect. In other words, what the intellect holds is Matijnana. That jnana which occurs through the same five senses and mind, but with the support of pronounced words, that is to say through scriptures-Shastras-agama granthas etc, is Shrutajnana.

Page #402
752 I am the Soul Shrutajnana occurs with the presence of Matijnana. Where there is mati there is shruta and vice versa. Both are complementary jnanas. If there is one, the other is bound to be there. It can never happen that some jiva has only one of the two. All jivas in the material world have both these jnanas. Whether it is a uni-sensory micro jiva in the nigoda gati or a jiva in human form with five active senses, no jiva would be without knowledge. The reason behind this is that knowledge is the characteristic of atma. The characteristic does not get separated from the substance. It will never get totally obliterated. The speciality is that a jiva with samakit - equanimity will have true mati-shruta jnana through which it will realise the propriety of a substance, and the transitions in its characteristics. While a Mithyatvi jiva understands the substances in their external appearance, with its own mati-shruta jnana; it will know only about the immediate utility of that substance. Perhaps, it may also know about the past and future states of the substance, but in principle, it does not know what the substance is. Just as it is unaware of the true inner form of the inanimate substances, it is also unaware of the animate atma. It has no experience of 'I am the soul'. Its misconception of the body being the soul is not yet cleared and hence its mati and shruta will be called mati-ajnana (ignorance) and shruta-ajnana. While the samyaktvi jiva's experience of "I am the soul' has influenced its mati and shruta and hence its mati and shruta will be called mati-jnana and shruta-jnana. For mati-shruta jnana to occur, just as the external means are the senses and the mind, the internal means is the kshayopashama (fading away) of matijnanavaraniya and shrutajnanavarniya karma. In other words, as the shroud of karma on the Matijnana and Shrutajnana begins to weaken, as the jiva begins to unveil the shrouds gradually through its own purushartha, the knowledge lying in the atma begins to appear. All the jivas in the material world do have either mati

Page #403
I am the Soul 753 Shrutajnana or ajnana. But not all have the same degree of kshayopashama; since there is discernment in it, that knowledge too cannot be similar in all. For instance, intellect. Intellect is a type of Matijnana. Intellect is seen in all jivas whether big or small, but it is not the same in all of them. Neither is it the same in all humans. The reason being that kshayopashama of matijnanavarniya karma is not identical in all humans. Indeed, there arises a question as to how there can be matiShrutajnana in a micro-uni-sensory jiva? That jiva too has at least one sense. It absorbs a subject through that one sense. Where there is absorption of a subject through a sense, there is bound to be knowledge. A jiva enjoys the subject absorbed through a sense. Where there is enjoyment, there is knowledge. There is feeling. If knowledge were not to be there, if feeling were not to be there, there would not be any enjoyment. Even a micro-uni-sensory jiva enjoys a subject which it has absorbed through it sense of touch, by the interaction of its body. Therefore, even to that jiva knowledge is open, albeit in an infinite part of the letter. As the jiva progress into higher level of senses from the uni-sensory level, it begins to acquire more senses, and thereby more subjects for the senses, and their enjoyment and feeling progresses. All this mati-shruta is acquired because of the fading away of the jnanavarniya and thereby the mati-shruta goes on increasing The human jiva with five senses is endowed with senses, mind and intellect -- all specific powers. The subjects which can be learnt through these powers are also many. The power of feeling is also greatly enhanced. A human has the ability to sense through body, mind and above all through intellect. This indicates that the kshayaopashama of mati-shruta jnanavarniya is the maximum in humans. All the powers in humans are more

Page #404
754 I am the Soul developed compared to other jivas. Therefore, if a human makes a tremendous effort towards diminishing mohaniya, then his matishruta ajnana is removed and gets replaced with jnana. That is why the mati-shruta available to a human is greatly benevolent. He is able to experience the self, feel the self only through that jnana. He is also able to realise the true form of the gunasthanas from the fourth to the fourteenth through this same jnana. He is able to unravel the mysteries of the agamas through this knowledge. He also hears, contemplates upon, and follows the advice of the Sadguru and attains the state of Siddha through this knowledge. A jiva may well not have Avadhijnana or manahaparyavajnana, and yet its soul can progress with the help of just mati-Shrutajnana, to reach the state of omniscience and then dissolve all karmas to attain moksa. Thus the two jnanas which are beneficial to a jiva are mati and shruta. The other two may well be in the form of development of the prowess of knowledge but are not instrumental in the attainment of siddhi. While we are discussing jnana, let us also consider avadhi and Manahparyavajnana. That knowledge which without the aid of senses or mind, can see substances with form to a certain limit, is Avadhijnana. This jnana occurs with the fading away of the avadhijnanavarniya karma. All jivas will not have a similar kshayopashama. Hence Avadhijnana has been categorised into six types thus 1. Anugami, 2. Ananugami, 3. Vardhaman, 4. Hayaman, 5. Pratipati, and 6. Apratipati. - The limit of Avadhijnana available to a jiva at a particular place, continues to accompany it, wherever the jiva goes. For example, if a sadhaka has attained a limit of 300 Km of Avadhijnana he will be able to perceive in that radius. In other words, he will be able to know what is there, what is happening

Page #405
I am the Soul 755 and what will happen in, and the substances with form and their transitions in a radius of 300 km around him. Even if he changes his location, the radius remains the same. Like the light of a lamp in the hands of a person, which travels along with the person going around. This is anugami Avadhijnana. A jiva can perceive only from the point where Avadhijnana occurred to it and not when it goes away from that point. Again when it returns to the same spot, it can perceive. Like a person sitting next to a lamp can see to a certain extent around the spot. If he rises and goes away while the lamp remains there, he will not see beyond the lit area. Again when he returns to the lamp, he is able to see. This is ananugami Avadhijnana. If after attaining Avadhijnana, the kshayopashama of avadhijnanavarniya progresses with the inner purushartha, then the intensity of Avadhijnana also grows. That which continues to grow in the four ways of substance, area, time and feeling is vardhaman Avadhijnana. On the contrary, if the efforts begin to fade and the kshayopashama, instead of progressing, begins to diminish, the intensity of the Avadhijnana attained also begins to weaken. This is hayaman Avadhijnana. That Avadhijnana which goes away even after attainment, due to the shroud of avadhijnanavarniya karma is pratipati Avadhijnana. That Avadhijnana which never goes away after attainment, and remains with the jiva all along, and gets transformed into kevaljnana, is apratipati Avadhijnana. To the manushya and tiryancha gatis, Avadhijnana can occur through specific pursuit and after the kshayopashama of avadhijnanavarniya karma. Anyone of the six types of Avadhijnana can occur. Even here, the Avadhijnana that occurs to a Mithyatvi jiva has been called avadhiajnana or vibhangajnana, while that which occurs to a samyaktvi jiva has been called Avadhijnana.

Page #406
I am the Soul In the deva and naraka gatis, due to the effect of the nature of those regions, a jiva has Avadhijnana the moment it takes birth there. The kshayopashama of avadhijnanavarniya karma is of course the internal reason. However, the external reason is merely the birth in those regions. 756 Here it may occur to some that it is alright for devas to have Avadhijnana for they would be born in that region with a lot of punya. However, how can the jivas who are born in hell, with a great lot of sins to their credit, also attain Avadhijnana? In reply to this question, we should first understand that the occurrence of Avadhijnana is not the result of punya. It is not as if a jiva with a lot of punya attains Avadhijnana. For Avadhijnana is not an audayika - generative state but a kshayopshamika state of fading karma. Jnana occurs due to the fading away of jnanavarniya karma and not due to the rise of punya. Therefore, the Avadhijnana that occurs to the devas is not due to punya, but due to the effect of the nature of that region. Now, the jivas in hell can also attain Avadhijnana because there is no necessity of rising punya. The region of hell is such that howsoever extreme sins that the jiva might have brought along, it is bound to attain Avadhijnana. In the species of birds, a jiva is born with wings. In spite of being less endowed with punya, that specie is such that wings are there at birth itself. We sometimes feel enamoured with this prowess available to the birds. They can journey several thousand miles in a very short time. It is understood that during December - January, when certain regions become extremely cold, birds from that region traverse thousands of miles in a short while to come to our country and spend some two-three months and then return to their abode. Brothers! If we too were to have wings, we would not have left any country in the world unseen. But alas! We did not get that prowess.

Page #407
I am the Soul 757 So just as the bird species is such that jivas born there inevitably get wings at birth, the jivas born in heaven or hell also invariably get Avadhijnana. The devas view their own and others' previous births through Avadhijnana. Indeed, some samakit devas, through their knowledge, foresee the time of happenings of janma, deeksha, kevaljnana and moksa in the life of the Tirthankars and join in to celebrate those events in this mortal world. Even the naraki jivas are able to view their own previous births through their Avadhijnana; they recollect their enmity with other jivas earlier, and if those jivas too are born in the hell, they avenge themselves. The extent of revenge that can be taken in hell cannot be matched anywhere else. What does a jiva do to extract revenge in human or animal species? At best it can kill the enemy. If the passions are at the extreme, it might even dismember the cadaver of the rival into pieces. What more can it do? While in the hell, the naraki jivas' bodies are such that even if they are cut up into pieces as small as mustard seeds, they get together like mercury and the entire body gets recreated. In other words, they do not die at all. However, the torture of being cut up has to be suffered. This happens thousands and millions of times in their lives, they undergo the torture and get recreated. Therefore, in hell, enmity can be avenged to the fullest. Those jivas, which enter into a vicious enmity, have to enter the hell to repay it, where at the least the life would be ten thousand years long and at most in terms of sagaropam time, which we cannot even imagine. So this is how the Avadhijnana is used in hell. The fourth is Manahparyavajnana. This jnana occurs through the kshayopashama of manahparyavajnanavarniya, only to those nirgrantha munis observing the five great vows while at the seventh gunasthana, apramatta sanyati and labdhidhar great souls, and not to others. Those minds which possess this jnana are able to know the minds of other jivas at all times.

Page #408
758 I am the Soul Whatever the jivas with a mind had thought, are thinking and will be thinking is all known to them. This jnana is again categorised as - Rujumati and Vipulamati. While rujumati does not perceive very clearly, vipulamati. gives a clear perception. Indeed, among the two there is a difference from the viewpoints of substance, area, time and feeling. Similarly, rujumati Manahparyavajnana goes away after occuring once. Vipulamati does not go away once it arises. It remains until the attainment of kevaljnana. The last is kevaljnana. The infinite knowledge that suddenly emerges in the infinite regions of the atma due to the complete erosion of jnanavarniya karma, is kevaljnana. There are no categories in this. There is no difference between the kevaljnana of one atma and another; whether it occurs to an ordinary kevali, a supreme soul of Tirthankar, the Arihant deva or to the Siddha Bhagavant. The feeling of kevaljnana of all the three in its own region, is identical. It is not essential for Avadhijnana or Manahparyavajnana to have occurred before attaining kevaljnana. Several jivas attain kevaljnana even without attaining the earlier two. But it is imperative that Samyak occurs with the removal of mati-shruta mithya. Only then can kevaljnana occur. The early four jnanas of mati-shruta etc., are related to kshayopashama. As a result there is a discerning feeling in them; they tend to increase or decrease; they also occur and disappear. But kevaljnana is through kshayika bhava. There are no categories in it. Nobody's kevaljnana is lesser than others. There is no appearing and disappearing. All four jnanas i.e. mati-shruta etc. get absorbed into it. Such infinite knowledge - complete knowledge - such omniscience. Howsoever advanced the four jnanas of mati-shruta etc. may be, they form only an infinitesimal part of kevaljnana. This should help visualise the infinity of kevaljnana.

Page #409
I am the Soul 759 Indeed, kevaljnana is unique - infinite and complete. At every moment all the substances and all the transitions of this world are reflected in it. The reflection of the transitions vanishes but kevaljnana will remain just as it was. Infinite as ever. It neither increases nor decreases by even an iota. That knowledge which has such completeness is kevaljnana. The composers of the Upanishads, have offered a visualisation of the completeness of the Parabrahma, Paramatma which perfectly describes the infinite completeness of kevaljnana OM pUrNamadaH pUrNamidaM pUrNAt pUrNamudacyate / pUrNasya pUrNamAdAya pUrNamevAvaziSyate // It is whole. Even after the whole is removed from the whole, it remains whole. Even after the whole is multiplied with the whole it remains whole. That is the infinity of kevaljnana. It remains infinite even when all the infinite that is worthy of knowing in this world is reflected in it, and it remains infinite even after all the transitions of all that is worthy of knowing have vanished. Let us salute such a unique and complete kevaljnana. Here the pursuit that begins with mati-shruta ends with kevaljnana. Such a path of knowledge is the same at all times. Infinite utsarpini and avasarpini periods have passed but in all times the jiva has attained knowledge only in this sequence and only on this path. There is no other path. Therefore, Srimadji says - AgaLa jJAnI thaI gayA, vartamAnamAM hoya, engt ahtoo faruri, urf the ante .....898 All the sages belonging to the past, present and future, whether they were mati-shruta jnanis due to their incomplete knowledge or were kevaljnanis in view of their complete

Page #410
760 I am the Soul knowledge, this was the only path on which they attained knowledge. When the desire to realise the true form of the self occurred, the illusion of body being the soul was removed. When an unwavering faith was inculcated that there is nothing else but 'I am the soul'; that I am not the body, senses, mind, chitta or intellect, only then mithyatva was removed and samyaktva attained. Along with Samyak darshan, then the jnana also became Samyak. The jiva, in spite of knowing all the substances in the world superficially, is ignorant as long as it does not know its own atma. But one, who has realised the atma, has learnt everything. There is nothing more left to learn. The Bhagavant who composed the scriptures, say - je egaM jANai se savvaM jANai / One, who knows the one, knows all. They never said that you would know the atma, if you knew the entire world. Therefore, one who has realised the atma is a jnani; is a Samyak jnani. One who has completely eradicated mohaniya and attained Veetaraag state is a sampurna jnani. If someone were to say, 'Our God is omniscient, in spite of having a certain desire and affection', then he is wrong. Desire and omniscience can never be together. The only way of attaining omniscience is the total absence of desire. One, who is able to completely destroy desire, is capable of attaining omniscience. Therefore, that knowledge which is apurna is Samyak jnana and that which is purna is kevaljnana. The path for attaining both these is the same. At all times those jivas who have attained, who are attaining and who will attain this, will do so only on this path. Of course, owing to the variation of time and location, the customs may differ, but the transformation within will never be

Page #411
I am the Soul 761 different. The sages did this, they attained in this only way and have indicated this path for us. Now, elaborating upon how the true original form of all jivas is similar and demonstrating the magnanimity of the Jain school of thought, what Srimadji has to say, will be learnt in due course ...

Page #412
All jivas are similar to Siddha ... The pursuit of three gems enables the jiva to attain the state of Siddha, which is in the form of their own supreme development. Whether it is termed as supreme development or as the fundamental true form of the jiva, it is the state of Siddha. That is also the goal of the jiva. The beginning of the pursuit of the atma is from the fourth gunasthana in the form of Samyak darshan. Further the jiva progresses gradually to attain the fifth and sixth gunasthanas in the form of virati. Touching the seventh gunasthana in the form of apramatta bhava, it proceeds to the eighth to climb on to the category of kshapaka and then within one antarmuhurta it reaches the twelfth gunasthana to attain kevaljnana. Then it remains in the pure state in the feelings of kevaljnana, kevaldarshan, kshayik samakit, shukla dhyan, yathakhyat, charitra etc., forever and ultimately becomes an ayogi from sayogi. It attains a mountain like state. In that unmoving-unwavering-motionless state like the Meru, it gains freedom from all karmas. Thus the journey from the fourth to the fourteenth gunasthana is a state of impermanence. All those gunasthanas are midway states. All that has to be passed as the journey continues on the path. This is but the path, though Siddhatva remains the goal. That is the permanent, endless state. It is adianant i.e. it begins but never ends. That is the goal of a jiva. However, if the midway states are not attained and passed, the goal cannot be reached. Therefore, in the Atmasiddhi Shastra, Srimadji has indicated all these steps of pursuit. All these steps have to be climbed. They have to be reached and left behind for progress. No doubt they have been called impermanent. However, it is not as if we are to abandon the purushartha for those respective gunasthanas considering their impermanence and presuming that all impermanence is inferior. In spite of being

Page #413
I am the Soul 763 impermanent, these states have to be attained. Therefore, one should not follow the principle that all that is impermanent is inferior and worthy of disposal. It is very important that the goal should always remain in the purview. Srimadji is trying to tell us, "your goal is within you. You can attain it if you desire - sarva jIva che siddha sama, je samaje te thAya, HU 31151 fortGym, fafael Rutie .....834 First the jiva has to understand and then follow it. The understanding that "I am in the true form of Siddha', should prevail. There is a unity of form in my self and in the form of Siddha, for, I am the atma. There is the state of Siddha in every jiva of the world, whatever be the sort of jiva. The sages categorise the jivas on the basis of their transitory bhavas, into two categories - 1. Bhavya -Noble, and 2. Abhavya - Ignoble. However, both these types are similar to Siddha. In the original true form of the atma, whether bhavya or abhavya, they are the same. Yet it is said that the bhavya jiva attains moksa. That is to say, that it will attain its original true state of Siddha and that the abhavya jiva will not. In spite of the original true form of both types of jivas being the same, the abhavya state that prevails in an abhavya atma disallows the occurence of spiritual progress. As a result even after wandering through external yogas it cannot awaken its own supreme state. Indeed, even within the bhavya category, two further divisions have been made - 1. Nikata bhavya, and 2. Durbhavya. The first type attains moksa early, while the second take a long, at times infinite time of suffering in this material world before they can attain moksa. Let us try to understand this fact at length. For example, the food-grains grown in a farm: In spite of all the grains having the capacity to sprout, only a few of the grains from one crop are

Page #414
764 I am the Soul sown in the field. Those sown sprout and grow and multiply. But the other grains do not get sown this year; their turn may come three or four years later. Until then they are forced to wait. The ability to sprout came to be used after a delay. Other grains which are not reserved for sowing, go away into the food-cycle, they get ground and converted to flour and used as food. Was there no ability to sprout, in the grains which came to be eaten? There was, but they did not get the yoga of growth at all and hence could not grow in spite of having the ability. Well, this is how it is in the case of nikata bhavya, durbhavya and the abhavya jivas. The nikata bhavya jivas get the yoga to attain the Siddha state through the early attainment of Samyak darshan. They prove their own bhavyatva -- Siddhatva by attaining their own transition into the form of Siddha. The durbhavya jivas get this yoga after going through several pudgal transitions and at the end they too attain the Siddhatva. But the abhavya jivas, in spite of having the ability to attain Siddhatva in the fundamental form, never get the yoga where they can awaken it. As a result they are never able to become the siddha. Here Srimadji, after indicating that there is Siddhatva in the jivas, addresses the bhavya jivas and says, "Understand, have faith and then follow'. In other words, 'devotedly pursue the True Knowledge, True Faith and True Conduct and you shall certainly attain Siddhi'. But he has placed two preconditions for this. "You alone have to attain. The purushartha will also be your own. The upadana shall also be yours. Yet the power that is behind all these is that of the nimitta - the reasons. For such lofty deeds, the nimittas also need to be lofty and exemplary. Once these are adopted, Siddhi shall not be too far. Your unrestrained behaviour and obstruction - break free from these and conduct yourself in the command of the Sadguru and secondly become properly aware of the state of Jina, and attain it. Then you can be certain of Siddhatva.'

Page #415
I am the Soul 765 What is the Sadguru's command? Do what the Sadguru has asked you to do. Here in the Atmasiddhi Shastra, the last of the six statements is 'moksopaya' - the solution to moksa - which is truly worth following. Gurudev has also indicated the same path of moksa. Following that path is the true carrying out of Sadguru's command. In the wonderful treatise by name 'Sri Jnanarnava' the composer says - virama virama saMgAn muJca muJca prapaJcam visRja visRja mohaM viddhi viddhi svatattvam / kalaya kalaya vRttaMpazya pazya svarUpaM kuru kuru puruSArthaM nivRttAnanda hetoH / / To those who really want to retire from the material world and enjoy the bliss of the Self, the Gurudev says, "First of all give up all company. The company of pudgals, and the company of people; these two companies are worthy of abandoning, for the state of jiva is a state of detachment. Give up all types of sinful activities. The jiva is simple. Activity is not the true nature of jiva. Give up desire. Desire is that which makes you wander in the material world. If there were to be no desire, there would not be this material world. Once this occurs to you, you will realise the principle of atma. Therefore, do all this and attain the principle of atma. Subsequently, practice the conduct. Repeated practice of the conduct will bring perfection, hence do it! Then understand the true original form. Your true form is the same as that of the Siddha. Therefore, know your own true form in its propriety, believe in it, touch it, experience it, and get immersed in the endless experience of the true form of the self.' Ultimately, make a tremendous effort for the infinite joy of moksa. Nothing is attainable without a tremendous effort. Moksa is attainable only through self-purushartha.

Page #416
766 I am the Soul Thus the Gurudev shows the way to the disciple who has the will to attain the joy of moksa. After doing all this it will never happen that you will remain without attaining moksa or that your Siddha state will not awaken. Therefore, the observance of this command has to be done with absolute dedication of all the yogas of tan-man-vachana (body-mind and speech). The second instrument has been stated as the contemplation upon the state of Jina and the effort to attain it. How this state of Jina is has also been described in Sri Jnanarnava' - atula sukha nidhAnaM jJAna vijJAna bIjam / vilaya gata kalaMkaM zAnta vizva pracAram / / galita sakala zaMka vizvarUpaM vizAlam / bhaja vigata vikAraM svAtmanAtmAnameva / / Nija svarup (true form of the self) is the same as Jina svarup (true form of the Jina). Therefore, Gurudev addresses the atma and says, 'O Atman! You are the reservoir of infinite incomparable bliss. All the joys of the material world are worthless in comparison with your bliss. The joy of an Emperor in ruling over an empire of six continents is nowhere in comparison to a moment of the joy of atma. You are the reservoir of such unparalleled bliss.' 'The seed of all knowledge and science is there within you. There is no need to borrow even the infinite-most part of a letter for the awakening of your infinite knowledge. You are in a position to attain your infinite knowledge from within your self.' "Where there is the material world, there shall be blemishes - kalanka. Where there are desires, there shall be blemishes. You are neither the material world nor in the form of desire, therefore, you are blemish-less - nishkalanka.' "The peace of your atma is spread over the entire universe. You will never get disturbed. You will not disturb anybody. You are endowed with such unlimited absolute peace.'

Page #417
I am the Soul 767 You are the possessor of that nirvikalpa state - within which all Vikalpas have been absorbed. Your state is the absolute pure state of the atma. There is no doubt - shanka about it. Therefore you are nisshanka - free of all doubts.' *Kevaljnana is all pervasive - it occupies the Loka-Aloka. Such power of kevaljnana is lying within you. Hence you are pervading the universe.' "Pursue this pure true form of such a great and dispassionate atma, in your atma through your atma. Meditate upon that true original form.' Here Gurudev has told that the Nija svarup (true form of the self) is the same as Jina svarup (true form of the Jina), and that it can be attained through meditation. The Jina form can be attained by meditating upon the state of Jina. jina svarUpa thaI jina ArAdhe, te sahI jinavara hove re, zRMgI ilikAne caTakAve, te jaMgI jaga jove re . . . Anandghanji maharaj says that when the jiva restrains the feelings of attachment etc., and devotedly pursues the great Jina with the goal of attaining the Veetaraag state, it becomes the great Jina. By the law of 'keeta-bhramar' (worm is bumblebee) it is said that the bumble bee builds a mud-comb, picks up a worm from green grass, stings it and dumps it into the mudcomb, and for days together hovers around the comb with a humming sound. The worm is suffering from the sting, but it likes the humming and it gets attached to it. It does not die of the unbearable pain but lies unconscious. The same worm turns into a bumblebee and emerges from the mud-comb to be mistaken for the same bumblebee by the outside world. By the same law, one becomes the great Jina by becoming immersed in the true form of great Jina and devotedly pursuing the great Jina.

Page #418
768 I am the Soul Thus the siddha state lying within the jiva gets awakened by properly absorbing the two nimittas - reasons of Sadguru's command and meditation upon the true form of the great Jina. But those who disregard these reasons do not attain the Jina state. This topic will be dealt with later ...

Page #419
One who abandons the reason ... The pursuit of the three gems can be properly done by that jiva which can properly discern the upadana-nimitta. Both are valuable at their own places. If upadana is necessary, then so is nimitta. It is true that if the upadana of the self is prepared, only then a jiva can attain the siddha state on the strength of its own purushartha. However, it is necessary to ensure that the nimittas that are required along with it are not excluded. Srimad Rajachandraji, while clarifying this fact, tells us some very important things. Every single gatha of the epilogue is very important and cryptic. Here he is exposing the timeless truths. He has explained in the earlier gatha that the command of the Sadguru and the state of Jina are two strong reasons. Now he is trying to explain how important these reasons are. upAdAnanuM nAma laI, e je taje nimitta, ura af fhearat, te vifarui fera .....83EUR What is upadana? Upa is near and adana is to absorb. What is absorbed from nearby is upadana. That is to say, that power of substance, which arises from the substance itself, is upadana. The upadana reason that occurs from every substance is its own and the power that generates from other substances is the nimitta reason. On the path of moksa, atma is itself the upadanakarana. The ability to attain is within the atma. The strength to become absolutely free of bondage is also within the atma. Thus the main reason for moksa is atma itself. The niscaya naya too, states that the atma becomes free of bondage, through its own purushartha. No other substance allows anything to be done for the atma. Yet the need for nimitta is inevitable. Without the presence of nimitta, upadana cannot get activated. The power to transit into the form

Page #420
770 I am the Soul of attachment etc. is in the jiva alone. No substance other than the jiva has the ability to transform into the form of attachment etc. Indeed, the ability to transform into the state of veetaraag too is in the atma alone. In the inanimate substances, if there is no attachment, there is neither the state of veetaraag. In spite of both these strengths being with the atma, there is an external substance, which is in the form of nimitta. In the occurrence of the feeling of attachment etc. in the jiva, karma and other personthing-situation etc. would have been the nimitta and where the jiva came into the state of veetaraaga too, there Guru's advice and the diminishing of mohaniya are the nimitta. Thus, without nimitta neither the affected disposition nor the natural disposition of the jiva can occur. In the practical life too, it happens the same way. There too, for any work to happen, upadana is our own, while nimitta is from another. But the inconsistency of the jiva is such that it believes that any good, which occurs in its practical life, is done by itself and that nimitta has done nothing to cause it. While it throws the entire blame on nimitta when anything goes bad. There it does not think that "I too have contributed to this'. Nimitta alone can do nothing. Indeed, even a greater inconsistency of the jiva is that it absorbs the nimittas for anger etc. with a great alacrity. Ask your self! How many times could you remain peaceful when there were reasons to get angry? And how many times could you get active when there were nimittas for pursuing atma? When you get angry you say, 'How can I help! I do not want to get angry, but this person made me angry'. But have you ever said that the sages have taught forgiveness and through their nimitta I have learnt forgiveness? It does not take you long to absorb harmful nimittas, while you do not allow the good nimittas even to touch you.

Page #421
I am the Soul 771 Not just that, there you even believe that "my siddha state is within my self, why do I need to depend on anybody? I shall acquire what is my own within my self, by myself.' But no! Srimadji says to such jivas, "Inana, darshan and charitra are your own characteristics. They are not to be brought from outside. You are to awaken them from within your atma. But it will not work if you ignore the nimittas." He says --- evAM mULa jJAnAdi pAmavA re 377 Har hafa de ... Ho... upadeza sad guruno pAmavo re cro Falora a ufada ...4 ... If you want to attain the knowledge etc. which are your fundamental characteristics and if you want to break away from the bondage of infinite time, the first thing you should do is to listen to the advice of the Sadguru. You can never attain your own true form without lapping up Sadguru's advice, without letting it percolate within, without bringing it into practice. But in doing so the two hurdles are svachchanda and pratibandha (unrestrained behaviour and obstruction). Srimadji in one of his letters has said, "The two biggest bondages in a jiva are svachchanda and pratibandha. One who wants to avoid svachchanda should follow the Guru's command and one who wants to avoid pratibandha has to renunciate all ties. Srimadji has already said a lot about svachchanda in the opening pages of this Shastra. The stubborn insistence of going by one's own opinion and pride is svachchanda. What is pratibandha - obstruction, and of what? That which ties a jiva at every time is pratibandha. The jiva has the company of pudgal. It has attachment with the pudgal. There is the ego and pride within. All these feelings are obstructions for a jiva. A great saint may be around; that could be a great opportunity of satsang. But the jiva would be so engrossed in its attachment

Page #422
772 I am the Soul with the material world and so entangled in the web of desire that it does not have the time to go and listen to the discourse of that Sadguru. Desire and possessiveness in the material feelings draw it away and hence it is unable to free itself and derive benefit from interaction with the Sadguru. Secondly, there could also be pratibandha due to karmic bondage and the rise of karma. It is said in the scriptures that the jiva keeps acquiring bondage of karma from time to time. How does it happen? The earlier karmas are lying in wait. When their time is ripe, they arise and offer their fruit. The jiva gets involved with the result that arises. If punya arises and offers a positive fruit, the jiva gets involved in enjoying it. If papa arises and offers a negative fruit, it still gets involved in enjoying it. The positive fruits of karma contribute to attachment while the negative ones contribute to aversion. Attachment and aversion are both instrumental in further karma bondage. That is, getting involved with the positive or negative fruits of karma binds you in the karmas of attachment and aversion. Thus jiva's involving with the rise of karmas will lead to karma bondage and that is pratibandha. Atma is pure and dispassionate, but it becomes passionate because of its karmic bondage. This passion gives rise to attachment with company and hinders the jiva from coming face to face with the Sadguru. If this pratibandha is to be avoided, then the jiva will have to inculcate the feeling of being only a witness. Karma is bound to arise in due course, but if the jiva does its kshayopashama, then it does not get involved with the karma. Why! Perhaps vipakodaya may have occurred but if jiva's understanding keeps it from developing mohodaya, then it does not develop new karmic bondage and thus the jiva's pratibandha gets avoided. Thus after avoiding svachchanda and pratibandha, the jiva can absorb the nimitta of Sadguru's advice. This becomes helpful

Page #423
I am the Soul 773 in the attainment of the fundamental characteristics of the atma. Therefore, nimitta is not to be abandoned. While upadana is in the form of niscaya, nimitta is in the form of vyavahara. Without Vyavahara, niscaya alone does not accomplish anything. The great poet Banarasidass has said - guru upadeza nimitta bina upAdAna balahIna jyau nara dUje pAMva bina calabe ko AdhIna Without nimitta in the form of Guru's advice, upadana becomes powerless. Upadana alone can do nothing. Just as for a man to walk both legs are necessary; if for some reason one leg is amputated, he cannot walk with one leg. He may well have crutches or a walking stick or any other device, but two legs are required to walk. Thus, even after having upadana, nimitta is essential. Thus the underlying intention in saying this is that many who walk the path with the refuge of niscaya alone, do not want to absorb the refuge of the three principles of deva, Guru and dharma in vyavahara. They say that, "my atma is my deva, my knowledge is my Guru and upayoga is my dharma. Why do I need any other deva, Guru or dharma? It has been said for the benefit of such stubborn minded jivas, 'your upadana may well be very strong, but if a proper nimitta is not found, upadana can do nothing Through a practical example, the great poet Banarasidass says - jJAna naina kiriyA carana hou zivamaga dhAra, upAdAna nihacai jahAM NEI FAHAAT LAR..

Page #424
774 I am the Soul If you have the eyes of knowledge and the legs of activity, then there will be rapid progress along the path of moksa. Otherwise, you remain in an undeveloped state and continue to wander in the material world. Therefore, it is necessary to understand that if upadana is in the form of niscaya, then nimitta is in the form of vyavahara. That jiva which has understood this, harbours the thought of nimitta along with preparing its upadana. In the Sukhavipaka Sutra, there is a section on Subahukumar. He had taken twelve vows. Once while he was keeping a vigil in the poshadhashala after performing poshadha, it occurred to him, "How fortunate that land and the city is where Shramana Bhagawant Mahaveer was travelling and how fortunate are those jivas who are going across the ocean of sansara with the proximity of Prabhu. When will I get such an opportunity? If Prabhu Mahaveer were to come, I would renunciate every tie with the material world and get ordained at the feet of Prabhu'. Subahukumar's strong desire brought Prabhu Mahaveer to the city of the former and he was then ordained into the ascetic order. Brothers! Subahukumar desired a nimitta. He prepared his own upadana and the moment he got the nimitta, he absorbed it and attained the betterment of his soul. He is bound to become a Siddha in due course. Here Srimadji says that moksa is attainable only if nimitta is absorbed, and not otherwise. Those who ignore nimitta remain in the illusion that they are attaining something, but do not gain anything. Here we have been told what the stubborn jiva is losing and where. In spite of being in the form of Siddha itself, it is unable to attain it because of its own folly. If this fault is rectified, then the true form of Siddha can certainly be attained. Now, where else the life can wander, will be learnt later ...

Page #425
Talking about knowledge ... The jiva, which pursues the three gems, becomes omniscient. Omniscience is the ultimate transformation of the characteristic of knowledge. The complete experience of the self with all its characteristics along with the knowledge of all the substances and their transitions in the universe is complete knowledge. Other than kevaljnana, which is in the form of complete knowledge, all other jnanas are incomplete. Only kevaljnana is complete. Indeed, as mentioned earlier, kevaljnana is infinite. Mati-shruta jnana etc., are all terminable, and not just that even the knowledge of jivas who know the purvas is but an infinite part of the kevaljnana - same as a droplet of water in comparison with the deep ocean. The value of the knowledge of a shrutadhar or purvadhar is as good as a droplet of water compared to kevaljnana, nothing better. If this truth is understood then no jivu would be able to take pride in its knowledge. The only jnana that is worth being proud of is kevaljnana. On several occasions I mention in my discourses that 'if you have a mind to be proud of your knowledge, let if wait for a while. What is the point in taking pride in such a shallow knowledge? If at all you want to be proud, then wait till you attain kevaljnana. No jnana can stand in comparison with it.' Brothers! I know what is on your mind. You are going to say, Only when all pride within is destroyed, does kevaljnana occur. Then how can one be proud? Well! This indicates that jnana is not a device for being proud. While acquiring or after having acquired knowledge, let us salute the Jinavar and say, 'O Prabhu! I have learnt a lot. I believe I have acquired a lot of knowledge but it is no more than an infinite part of your knowledge.' Then our pride will be demolished and humility will naturally prevail. The incomplete jiva which is unaware of the limitations of its own knowledge begins to believe that there is nobody as

Page #426
776 I am the Soul learned as I', the moment it has acquired some knowledge, read some treatises and understood a little. It even desires to be revered and respected and begins to expect this from people. Srimadji refers to such jivas, who have not overcome such desire for accolades and fame, which still remains within them, as unfaithful mukhathI jJAna kathe ane, aMtara chUTyo na moha, a 4747 yiufta, 4E THAT STE.....839 Those stubborn jivas, who claim niscaya as the only way, whose actions are not consistent with their statements, who talk about the true pure form of the atma - 'I am the eternal true pure atma, my lord atma is detached and different from all, it is the dispassionate Lord, endowed with immense power' - so on and so forth. They sing praises of many such other characteristics, thinking they are endowed with complete knowledge. However, if they are examined internally, we see that they are filled with as many passions. They believe themselves to be the eternal truth but are not free from the fear of death; do not like to die, running away from the very mention of death. Why does an eternally true substance have to die? Yet, "What if I die?' is a thought that is nagging them always. They do not believe in their own true eternal form. While they talk of the purity of the soul, they cannot forego even one nimitta of attachment and aversion. Their inner self is not free from the attachment for passions; not once do they falter in abetting the passions. As an experiment these wise ones should be tested by giving them the cheapest and tasteless food and their reactions, their feelings, their transitions should be observed; we will know whether their atma is well and pure or whether it is filled to the brim with the state of attachment. Brothers! In the scriptures, there is a reference to the ascetic Dhanna and some more munis like him, who would perform a severe penance of

Page #427
I am the Soul 777 fasting of six days or eight days, and on the day they broke their fast, would eat just one handful of tasteless food. Yet, their body and minds were filled with equanimity. No subject relating to the senses could be of their interest. Such great men would truly have attained the state of atma. Others would be neck-deep into the passions of the senses and merely talk of pure atma. Their activity in the material world would not have improved in any way. Their intrigue and involvement with the material world would not be altered at all. Why! We can also find persons talking about niscaya naya while believing just that all this talk should be for deriding other faiths in the fields of dharma, knowledge and satsang. There they put forth niscaya naya, while in their own fields of activity, business and relations they live just like the others. There they do not like anything to change. In their activities, just like the others, if there is anything amiss between them and others, they immediately develop animosity. They resort to guile and lament. 'So and so celebrated an occasion, but did not call me, did not invite me, or did not respect me. Not just that! I had presented a gift worth Rs. 500/to his son, yet, when occasion arose at my place, he has brought something worth only Rs. 100/-.' Many such occasions arrive in life and we always respond with feelings of attachment and aversion. So can we call these people as knowledgable? They certainly do study the scriptures everyday; they have learnt some catchwords by heart, which they go around dropping everywhere, and if they get a chance to do so in the presence of people from other faiths, their mad love for dharma seems to rise and get mixed up with animosity. What difference is there in the conduct of an ignorant jiva, which does not know anything about the atma, and the conduct of such niscayavadis?

Page #428
I am the Soul After having realised the true pure form of the atma, the ego has to dissolve. Instead, the ego found here is more than anywhere else. Brothers! Pardon me, but when you see the ego of a person talking about niscaya naya, one wonders how the scriptures that came to him and the talks that he heard about pure niscaya, could be so transformed! How could they become instrumental in inflating the ego? The omniscient supreme soul has said in the scriptures, 'Whatever be the agamas, to a Mithyatvi they turn into a form of mithya'. One can see this statement practically proving itself in such jivas. 778 Not just that! The moment they read some scriptures, learn some of them by heart, and with an expertise in oratory learn to speak well, their yearning for fame and status begins to grow. They desire that the society should admire and follow them, and that their glory and fame should grow. They set aside the God whom they used to believe and begin to run a sect in their own name. Brothers! How bad the times are! What a farce going on in the name of dharma! One has to pity the people who talk of grand things. That is why, Srimadji has said that such pitiable jivas, who talk about niscaya but the desire within them has never diminished, are destitute, impoverished and deprived. What else can be done but to have pity on them? However, Srimadji says that the greater reason for pitying these people is that they do not know what they are doing. In their desire to hear that 'they are jnanis, they know it all, nobody else knows as much as they do and understand', they make the greatest blunder. First of all they do not get to recognise the true knowledge. They cannot go to the feet of the sages. They cannot develop a feeling of awe towards the sages. They cannot pay respect and devotion to the sages. On the contrary, they try to prove the sages.

Page #429
I am the Soul 779 wrong. They harbour animosity towards the sages and begin to carry ill will for them. What a great treason! In this age too we get to see this all around us. Our history too is witness to it. How treacherously Goshala behaved with Mahaveer! But Brothers! I would say that Goshala was righteous. He did not pretend. If he developed feelings of animosity against Mahaveer, he came into the open and tortured Mahaveer in a way that the world could see, and got himself a place in history. But this age is a terrible age. In this age those who destroy each other with their envy and jealousy are so treacherous that they attack just like the tiger from the back. Those, against whom the envy and jealousy is directed, do not even realise it or even understand it. This deception causes the bondage of great mohaniya karma. Let us think about Goshala. In Bhagawan Mahaveer's chhadmastha state, he remained with the Prabhu as his disciple and travelled with him. He learnt a lot from Prabhu and began to travel independently. He was an ascetic and moreover had learnt several arts. He had learnt to read the past and predict the future. He started his own group and attracted people in the thousands. They became his devotees and began to propitiate Goshala. He had mastered the art of making people toe his line. With this art, it does not take long to build a crowd of devotees. Our dear Gurudev, the late Pujya Pranlalji Maharaj used to say often, 'There are those who will bend, it takes only one to make them do it.' This has been happening in all the ages. Goshala gathered devotees not in thousands but in lakhs. Time passed, and Mahaveer attained kevaljnana. He establilshed the tirtha and became a tirthankar. Not just humans, but demi gods and god of gods Indra too began to propitiate him. The immense sun of his omniscience began to shine bright.

Page #430
780 I am the Soul and strong. Goshala began to look pale before the radiant Prabhu. Goshala used to call himself Jina, arhat and sarvajna, and used to get propitiated. However, now everybody realised who the true Jineshwar was. Goshala's fraud was ripped open and he was full of anger. Indeed, how could he tolerate the Indras propitiating Bhagwan Mahaveer? And the fire of animosity flared. To prove that Mahaveer was a fraud and not a sarvajna and that he - Goshala - alone was the true sarvajna, he ran to the Prabhu to use his attained powers. Reaching there he began to insult the Prabhu through an attack of words. When Prabhu maintained silence, Goshala became more provoked, forgot Prabhu's benevolence upon him and directed his tejoleshya (energy-fire) towards Prabhu. Flames started emanating from his mouth and eyes and reached Prabhu's body. Prabhu was a great person, endowed with a strong punya of Jina namakarma. Therefore, the great fire could not burn him. The flames turned back after going around Mahaveer's body thrice and started burning Goshala. He began to cry in great unbearable pain. Then Prabhu released his sheetal-leshya (pacifying energy) and doused the fire. Brothers! Think! What is this? Goshala, burning in the fire of animosity, never thought, "Who am I planning to kill? Can I not bear the respect-propitiation-success of that person whom I had once accepted in the form of my Guru, whose disciple-hood I had accepted? Am I trying to prove the sarvajna to be wrong? How very ignorant of me!' Why! He had lakhs of disciples. Was he not scared that his deception would be seen through? He became infamous in the pages of history. Who was responsible for this? The ignorance. That is why Srimadji has said that such pitiable jivas do not recognise the sages and become the Guru's traitors. They renege against the sages. That is why it is very important to attain unity between

Page #431
781 I am the Soul talk and action. Only if the true desire for moksa has arisen within, then the importance of the sages can be understood and the ignorance of the self dispelled. The characteristics that arise in the inner self of the mumukshus will follow later ...

Page #432
The mumukshu is always alert... While devotedly pursuing the three gems, the virtues in a mumukshu jiva are steadily increasing. As aradhana progresses gradually, the infinite virtues in the atma appear one after the other. Mumukshuta is the unquenchable thirst for moksa. Srimadji says, while explaining which characteristics have to be first present in a jiva - cent, puifa, 2791, YAIT, ET, TT, TT; Ata uz fad, Te HERE gaire .....836 The dharma of Jineshwar is daya-compassion based. Daya has been called the root of dharma. dharma is only there where there is daya. Several people mistake daya for attachment and treat it as to be avoided. They are in a great delusion. The path of the Jineshwar is itself in the form of daya. One who claims to be a follower of Jineshwar and rejects daya, could be anybody else's follower but is certainly not a follower of Jineshwar. Srimadji also says - dharma tattva jo pUchyuM mane to saMbhaLAvU snehe tane; je siddhAMta sakaLano sAra, sarvamAnya sahune hitakAra / bhAkhyuM bhASaNamAM bhagavAna, dharma na bIjo dayA samAna; abhayadAna sAthe saMtoSa, dyo prANIne daLavA doSa / satya zIla ne saghaLAM dAna, dayA hoIne rahyAM pramANa; Gent TET at I thi Thet, fahr tref fahut te ha .... In these verses, Srimadji explains in very simple terms that dayadharma is the greatest of all dharmas. Where there is daya, it is followed by other characteristics. But if daya is lacking then as darkness pervades in the absence of the sun, or as it is not possible to see even one ray of the sun without its presence, without daya, the characteristics of truth, honour etc. cannot remain in a life.

Page #433
I am the Soul 783 In this gatha too, Srimadji has mentioned daya as the first characteristic while describing the characteristics of a mumukshu. Here daya - pity is svadaya - self-pity. One who has recognised the true form of the self, and that in spite of being the dispassionate, atma in chidrupa, it has become tainted due to karmas, due to affected disposition, due to attachment etc. This blemish, this malady is what hurts the jiva. When the jiva, which has been troubled by these maladies from infinite times, finds them unbearable, it develops a pity upon itself. That is called svadaya - self-pity. Such a jiva decides that it should not do anything that hurts the atma. Activities of violence etc. are bound to taint the atma and hurt it, so such activities are given up. Indeed, when the self develops self-pity, it also realises that 'if I do not like my atma to be harmed, then how can any jiva like to suffer harm to its body, mind or soul? Therefore, I should not hurt anybody.' Thus in self-pity, pity for others too gets accommodated. The feeling of compassion for other jivas arises naturally. One who has developed svadaya within, certainly realises that the feelings of attachment etc., are harmful - disastrous. Therefore, the activity arising out of the feelings of attachment etc., naturally subsides. There is a loss of peace only when there are the feelings of attachment etc. Peace can be experienced when involvement in the feelings of attachment etc., is stopped. That peace, which was not attainable from any situation, any place or any happiness derived from the pudgal, is available to the self from within. Therefore, the jiva seeks refuge with such sages at whose feet peace is always available and becomes their obedient and devoted follower. As the feelings of devotion and obedience gradually progress, the passions begin to diminish and as a result peace - supreme peace is experienced. One, whose passions are overpowered, is bound to get peace.

Page #434
784 I am the Soul With the arrival of peace, equanimity also comes in. The intensity of passions creates an imbalance in feelings. When the passions are overpowered, peace is the first to arrive followed by equanimity. Once the endlessly rising passions within are contained, they can never again harm the jiva. Like the milk placed on the stove for boiling. Its nature is to boil over. But the ladies have a knack for not letting the milk boil over. When the milk is about to boil over, they remove if from the stove or if they do not have the means at hand to do so, they sprinkle a handful of water on it. Once the boil-over has subsided, they find the means to bring down the vessel and set is aside and then the milk cools down on its own. Brothers! If you want to bring equanimity within, then this is what you do. If the passions are boiling over inside, they can be contained by understanding, but that will be momentary. But the concentration - chitta has to be drawn away from the passions. The chitta has to be on something - it has to be drawn away from passions and stabilised in the humility of the original form of atma, in meditation. Then the chitta separates from the passions and involuntarily the passions subside. And then, just as milk cools down once the boil-over has subsided and returns to its original disposition, the atma too involuntarily returns to the state of equanimity which is its original disposition. Once equanimity arises within, the nimittas of anger etc., cannot bother the jiva for long. Sometimes, on account of some earlier karmas, such nimittas arise and try to bother the jiva. But the jiva adopts forgiveness. It believes that anger is a fire and one who jumps into that fire will not remain without getting burnt. Therefore, it seeks refuge in the calm and peaceful waters of forgiveness and experiences peace. The feeling of forgiveness becomes so developed that even when some human, animal or god comes to inflict torture upon the jiva, it develops not animosity but compassion towards them.

Page #435
I am the Soul 785 It occurs to the jiva that 'this jiva is making me a nimitta and transiting into imbalance. The pitiable jiva is going to suffer extreme consequences.' So thinking the former jiva develops compassion and adopts forgiveness in its atma. In the scriptures, among the ten dharmas of the Shramanas, the first to be listed is khanti or kshama. That is why many of our earlier Acharyas used to be called Kshamashramana. Those, in whom the great characteristic of forgiveness has awakened, do not take long to awaken the remaining nine. A mumukshu who is endowed with all these characteristics has an unwavering faith in the principle of sat. Sat means atma. The awareness that 'I am the Soul' is constantly prevailing in it and therefore the jiva is always in a state of svadaya. Where svadaya prevails, there no iniquity can find refuge. For iniquity is the passionate state of jiva. Passions never offer any happiness or peace. They offer sorrow and disturbance. How can such a stable and devoted jiva harbour any passions at all? As a result, the five main sins of violence, untruth, stealing, adultery and aspiration will never arise. Where sat is the goal, where sat is the conduct, in their life, speech and thought there can only be satya - truth. Renunciation comes easy to the atma desirous of sat. It does not have to consciously try to sacrifice. For the possessiveness and attachment over things and subjects diminishes and therefore, renunciation comes naturally. And along with renunciation, there is always the rejection in the form of discontent with the material world and attachment etc. Thus, renunciation - tyaga and rejection - vairagya both are bound to be in the life of a mumukshu. Therefore, Srimadji has, in the opening gathas of Atmasiddhi Shastra, given us a lucid description of renunciation and rejection. Here too, he says that a mumukshu jiva is always alert about these characteristics. Deep within its self, these characteristics

Page #436
786 I am the Soul are being churned. To find out who is a true mumukshu or to ascertain whether you come into the category of mumukshus or not, the self has to be examined in the light of these seven characteristics. Those jivas who are conscious of these characteristics are mumukshus, and none others. Now, how the jnani state is, can be learnt later ...

Page #437
All else can be called illusion ... The devoted pursuit of the three gems gradually diminishes the feeling of desire. With diminishing desire, the purity of atma increases. All the impurity, blemish that is there in the atma is due to moha - desire. Moha is in two ways - faith in the contradiction of atma and possessiveness in the feelings of attachment etc. The atma is pure only when both these feelings are removed. Moha is uppermost among all passions of the atma. Hence it has been compared with a King. Just like a King who looks after his subjects, develops and protects his kingdom, Moha too nourishes various types of mithyatva, passions - kashayas like anger etc., nokashayas - sub-passions like rati etc., and the various maladies that arise out of them. It keeps on developing them. It extends a protection to them so that they do not lose their way from the atma. It is so capable in itself that it manages to protect all the others. It does not need anybody to protect itself. Not just that, this one feeling alone is capable of erecting an entire tradition of infinite sansar. The reason why the jiva has not attained the siddha state until now is this moha. The Samyak state will not awaken within the atma unless the state of moha is removed. Without Samyak state, there cannot be the veetaraaga state and without the veetaraaga state there cannot be the siddha state. Therefore, the jiva has to awaken the transition of Samyak dasha - state within the atma. With the awakening of the dasha the disha - direction changes. Those who have an awakened dasha are bound to change their direction. It does not take long then. Brothers! You are driving a car. You are following a straight direction. When the turn arrives and you want to change the direction, you do so with a minimum effort. What is required is

Page #438
788 I am the Soul knowledge of car driving in the first place, secondly a licence and thirdly a control over the steering wheel. Once you have all these, then you can take the car in any direction, for any distance. Similarly, if the jiva has to be taken away from the state of attachment etc. to the veetaraag state, it can be done provided there is the knowledge of that path, the ability in the jiva and the restraint on the transitions. One who can awaken such a state is a jnani. Defining such a jnani, Srimadji says - mohabhAva kSaya hoya jyAM, athavA hoya prazAMta; a chance girit am, arahat other pia .....838 Who should be called a jnani? Either, one whose feeling of moha is absolutely diminished, in other words - one whose moha in the forms of darshan mohaniya and charitra mohaniya is removed and who has attained an absolute veetaraag state, is a jnani. Or, one who is in a state where both these forms of moha have been more or less pacified or diminished, in other words - one who is in a state between the fourth and the tenth gunasthana. Why, even up to the eleventh gunasthana where the feeling of moha goes on diminishing or subsiding gradually. That state where the feeling of veetaraaga goes on increasing gradually. One, within whom such a state has awakened, is a jnani. In other words, that state where the attachment for the sansar or the feeling of sansar is absolutely diminished or is gradually diminishing, is the jnani state. Otherwise, a jiva who is attracted to all the feelings of sansar, who harbours affection for sansaric feelings, who is attempting to attain them and has also learnt many scriptures, is not a jnani, but in an illusion of knowledge. One whose state of knowledge is really awakened within will have an altered viewpoint. With that change in the viewpoint, its entire universe looks different. The desirability that an ajnani jiva sees in material substances, the attraction that pudgals tempt

Page #439
I am the Soul with, does not affect the jnani jiva. Its feeling towards a substance changes altogether. As a result, there arises a major difference between the common man's definition of a substance and that of a jnani. The great poet Banarasidass, while describing how the viewpoint of such a jnani - superior soul will be, in Nataka Samaysar says - kIcasau kanaka jAkai nIcasau naresa pada, mIsI mitAI guruvAI jAkai gArasI jaharasI jogajAti kaharasI karAmAti haharasI hausa pudgala chabi chArasI jAlasau jaga - vilAsa bhAlasau bhuvana vAsa kAlasau kuTuMba kAja loka lAja lArasI sIThasau sujasu jAnai bIThasau vakhata mAnai esI jAkI rIti tAhiM vaMdata banArasI 789 Gold is equivalent to dust and mire. In principle, there is no difference between gold and dust. Both are groups of pudgal paramanus. That is the fact. This view can be found in even many common people. There was a poor couple who worked hard and lived from hand to mouth. Once, at the behest of Parvati, Lord Shiva planned to gift them some gold. Both were going to the work spot, where Lord Shiva placed a bag full of gold coins in the way. The husband was leading and the wife followed at a distance. The husband hurt himself on the bag that was obstructing the road. The bag tore and spilled the contents. He was surprised to see the gold coins. The man thought, 'Somebody seems to have lost this bag.' He had no desire to pick it up but thought, 'My wife is following. Perhaps she would get tempted for we have been living in stark poverty. That would be a disaster. The desire to take away wealth that belongs to somebody else should not arise.' Therefore, he covered up the gold with some dust. Yet his wife.

Page #440
790 I am the Soul reached just then and asked, "What are you doing?' She had reached and seen what happened, so it was in order to explain the truth. So he told her, 'Someone has lost a bag of gold. I was not tempted, but I was worried that you might get tempted. Therefore, I was covering it up with some dust.' The wife's reply was very thought provoking. She said, "You might be seeing gold here, but I see only dust. What is the point in covering dust with dust?' Brothers! Here lies the difference in viewpoints. One who is contented within, who is honest, will always find others' wealth the same as stones. Banarasidass too says that such jivas treat gold and dirt - mire as equal. They find the king's status the same as that of a lowly commoner. Why so? We have an old saying, rAjezvarI so narakezvarI A king has to resort to intrigue along with politics. He has to accept many responsibilities leading to great arambha and great parigraha. As a result, very often he becomes eligible for a birth in hell. What is worse than hell? Therefore, a king's status is not great but very lowly. Without attachment and desire, there cannot be friendship. Where there is desire, there is also repeated death and birth. Therefore, friendship is treated as equal to death. The fame that is earned in this world is always false. For, the people who are all praises for you today will kick you out tomorrow and you will not know when. Those who are praising you today will start deriding you tomorrow. Hence fame is like a coating of hailstones. The activities of yoga etc. which lead to a bondage of karma are treated like poison and the magic of mantra and tantra, which mesmerises people, is treated like sorrow.

Page #441
I am the Soul 791 The desire to acquire prosperity in this world and fame and status is treated as disaster. This body which is like a statue of pudgals is treated as ash. You may well feed and strengthen this body, may well decorate it, may well wrap it with ornaments to make it look beautiful, you may sin a lot for it, but ultimately the body is going to turn into ash. Therefore, it is like ash. The enjoyment and luxuries of this world are like a fishnet. Once caught in it, one can never escape. Enjoyment pushes you into the mouth of death. And even becomes a tradition. Therefore, enjoyment and luxuries are like a net. In a jnani jiva there is always anguish over the rebirths. Even life in this world is like on the sharp edge of a spear-head for it. It does not like the hassles of the family, which is like the grip of death; it does not want to, but has to do things. The effort to enhance name and fame in the material world is dirty like saliva drooling from the mouth. Whether such fame is earned or not, it is the same. It has no value at all. That is why, those who have a real yearning for realising the self, are not afraid of public indignity. Even the Queen of Mewar - Mirabai, set aside her fear for public indignity when she developed the love for Krishna. Indignity has no value. Especially those jivas who want to proceed on the spiritual path can never progress if they remain stuck with indignity. Their movement is against the material world. The desire to attain or enhance success and fame is as worthy of absolute discard as refuse from the nose, because it nourishes the ego. And ego creates clashes. Therefore, it is not proper to desire success and fame. In fact, they treat the rise of punya equal to human excreta, which is not for enjoyment. For, enjoying the rise of punya leads to awakening of feelings of attachment etc., and there is more bondage of karma. Hence, they are to be discarded like human excreta.

Page #442
792 I am the Soul That jiva who harbours such feelings about the chitta, whose viewpoint is changed, remains untouched by the sansar in spite of living in it, like the lotus in water. It lives in the sansar, because it has to; the sansar does not live in it. Just as a boat which remains in water unlike the boat in which water remains and sinks it. Thus, the jiva has to remain in the sansar so long as it has not become shiva; however, it does not let the sansar make a home within it. The poet Banarasidass salutes such a superior person. Srimadji too, calls those jivas as jnani, whose feeling of desire has weakened, has got pacified. Such a jnani person's attachment and aversion would be highly diminished despite being in the sansar. Therefore, they get a very limited bondage of karma. Attachment and aversion - these two are the seed of karma. They are also the seed of imbalance. A person aglow with attachment and burned-up with aversion can neither see its own feelings nor the inner equanimity of all jivas. Those who cannot see equanimity, commit papa by getting attached to somebody or averse to somebody. Those with equanimity neither get attached nor averse to anybody. As such they do not commit papa. sammatadaMsi na karei pAvaM This is a very cryptic sutra. Those, who can see papa in its proper true form, can never commit papa. Only those, who do not know or cannot see papa in its true form, can commit papa. jAnAmi dharmaM na ca me pravRttiH jAnAmyadharmaM na ca me nivRttiH I know dharma but I do not practice it. I know adharma but do not give it up. This is the experience of the macro chitta. Since the Samyak darshan that occurs in the micro chitta does. not take the jiva into asamyak practice, a Samyak darshani jiva

Page #443
I am the Soul 793 does not knowingly commit papa. It might happen unknowingly, but the jiva never does it. Those, from whose chitta the activity of papa has gone away, are the jnanis. The feelings of papa diminish in the same degree as the feeling of moha diminishes. Those in whom such a state prevails are jnanis; others are all in illusion. The jiva that is stuck in feelings of moha, lost in moha, cannot be categorised as jnani. Therefore, it is called a wayward jiva. Now, how such jivas feel about the world, what their inner state is, will be told later ...

Page #444
The entire world is like left-overs ... Devoted pursuit of the three gems, enables you to understand the proper true form of the two substances of jada and chetan and also helps you experience the difference between the two. Jada is jada (inanimate) and chetan is chetan (animate). Despite knowing this, it is essential to know the characteristic transitions of the two substances. Srimadji is explaining that, the one, who has realised the atma and recognised the chaitanya in its proper true form, which then acts as an eye-opener, looks at the jada substance from a very different viewpoint, as against the way that the entire world does. Its relation with the entire inanimate world would have changed. The sharp vision of the jnanis reaches the depths of the jada substances. It catches the transitions within the jada that take place every moment. As a result, the approach of a jnani towards life also changes. It begins to lead a life diametrically different from what it lived earlier. With a change in viewpoint, the entire universe looks different. Srimadji, while telling us how such jnani jivas evaluate the poudgalika substances, says - sakala jagata te eMThavata, athavA svapna samAna, fag Frit am, arcat Use .....880 Ignorant man measures the entire world only with the measure of his intellect. "The world is only that which is encompassed within the limits of the intellect. Nothing more special than that.' Such is the ignorant belief of man. Nevertheless, intellect, however high it may be, is but a limited substance. It cannot break the limits of visibility and go beyond into the unlimited. That is why, an ajnani cannot know of the substances beyond the limits of intellect. There are infinite substances that exist beyond the intellect, which are outside the

Page #445
I am the Soul 795 limits that a jiva can gauge. Once the jiva accepts this, then it can leave behind the narrowness and enter that vast field. This narrowness is what creates desire and possessiveness in a jiva. Its possessiveness is unlimited in substances and relations that it meets. An ajnani is unwilling to let go of this at any cost. Why, if a substance or person leaves it, it begins to get engorged in the whirlpool of distress and feels its own sorrow! For such ajnani jivas there is no sorrow greater than the separation from mind, a substance or a person. This is absolute ignorance. Indeed, has the separation from a person or a substance, that causes sorrow, happened for the first time? If the union is not for the first time, then neither the separation can be the first ever. Separation of the union is inevitable. Therefore, as many times as the substances or persons have united, they are bound to separate. This is the eternal truth. In the infinite past, these same substances or persons have been united with the jiva, in one form or the other, not once but many times over. Either they all left the jiva and went away, or the jiva has left them all and come away. The jiva has been wandering in this whirl for infinite number of times, from infinite time. Let us consider this -- 'The poudgalika happiness that has been found in this present, whatever specific that is found, is something that only I have found and none other has. We take pride in such thinking. We are overwhelmed with our achievements. Since the others have not got it, we consider ourselves as more fortunate and the others as less so. We harbour many such illusions. However, when our viewpoint for looking at the pudgal dravyas changes, when we go into the depths and trace the substance, examine its past, we realise the truth. What are poudgalika substances? All the substances that come into our visibility, all those inanimate substances, all pudgal skandhas, are groups - pindas of infinite number of paramanus

Page #446
796 I am the Soul - atoms. The natural disposition of the paramanus is to meet and scatter. The viscosity and the dryness in the paramanus attaches and releases other paramanus. One paramanu attaches to another, two-three or more paramanus get together, or infinite number of paramanus get together to form a skandha. When a skandha of infinite number of paramanus is formed, it becomes visible to us, not earlier. Just as the skandha was formed with paramanus attaching to each other one by one, in fact, at every moment new paramanus come and join the skandha while those other paramanus in the skandha break and go away. This is a natural reaction in the world of paramanus. It continues naturally. Many types of substances are created as a result of this reaction. All visible, invisible substances and those, which come to be used by us, are all groups of paramanus, and nothing else. We absorb these groups in different ways. We absorb the eight types of pudgal categories, which have been defined, in those respective ways, use them and release them. All the jivas of the universe have been absorbing and releasing pudgal pindas and releasing them from infinite time. This action has never stopped nor will it ever. It has been happening incessantly and will continue so. Let us consider the absorption of pudgal pindas that happens in a jiva. There are infinite karma varganas in this universe. The jiva attracts them through its feelings of attachment etc., and is bound by it and thereby the varganas transform into karma. The karmas, remain with the atma for a certain time in the form of karmas, provide the results and separate from the atma. They get mixed up with other karma varganas in the atmosphere. A jiva might again absorb the same karma paramanus as karma or it might absorb other karma paramanus, which have been earlier absorbed and released by other jivas. In the same way, other jivas too absorb and release the karma paramanus earlier absorbed and

Page #447
I am the Soul 797 released by other jivas. Thus the karma paramanus absorbed and released by one another keep getting absorbed. Our interaction with the pudgals of the bhasha - language - vargana, mano - mind - vargana and respiration vargana is also similar. What we absorb has been absorbed and released earlier by other jivas. What we release is absorbed again and again and other jivas absorb that which is released by us. The jivas with vaikriya body, who are required to absorb vaikriya pudgals, also absorb and release in the same way. Similarly, the great sages endowed with aharak labdhis absorb the pudgals absorbed and released in the past by some other jivas. Others absorb what they release. They also absorb what they had released earlier. Audarik vargana is one such vargana that a jiva absorbs in many ways. First of all, our body is made up of audarik pudgals. When we absorbed these pudgals they were not entirely pure. They were absorbed and released by some jivas earlier, which were now absorbed. Our body is formed out of them. After the body is formed, the paramanu skandhas that we absorb every moment from the atmosphere are either those, which were earlier released by us or by others. This body absorbs and releases many paramanus at every moment. This reaction is continuous. The pudgal skandhas that are absorbed in the form of food by vegetarian jivas, are generated by the vegetation. We have absorbed in food-form, those pudgals, which were released by those jivas, which lived in the vegetation. It is true for the nonvegetarians too. It is an audarik body of some jiva or the other. Some jiva had absorbed it as an audarik body, which was left behind when the jiva went away from it; thereby the body that remained behind is a paramanu pudgal skandha. Therefore, it has been absorbed and released by a jiva.

Page #448
798 I am the Soul All the inanimate substances that come to be used in our lifetime by us have been used and left by some other jiva with an audarik body. Gold, silver, jewellery, metals, various chemicals etc. are pudgals absorbed, used and released by uni-sensory prithvikaya jivas in the form of bodies. Cloth, wood, various items of furniture and other substances that are useful in our life are all pudgals absorbed and released by vegetation jivas. Ivory, pearls or other such animal-based substances are all absorbed and released by those respective jivas. Thus the visible gamut of this universe is in fact the gamut of paramanus. All those paramanus have been absorbed and released by all the jivas of the world not once but many times. There is not one paramanu in the entire universe, which has not been absorbed or not touched by some jiva. For, every jiva of this world has been born and dead at akash pradesh-- sky space - infinite number of times. If it has not left even one sky space, then how could it have left even one paramanu that was located at that sky space? Thus all the paramanus of this world which are absorbed by a jiva are all earlier absorbed by other jivas in the past. Those jivas have absorbed, utilised and released these paramanus. This jiva too has absorbed and released these paramanus. Again it has absorbed the same paramanus. For, in the universe, there are infinite number of jivas and paramanus, infinite wandering of the jivas in the sansar and infinite absorption of the pudgals. Now, even if one jiva absorbs one paramanu only once, it will have absorbed all paramanus. Then what is left for the other jivas? However, the jiva absorbs paramanus many times over. Thus, the same jiva repeatedly absorbs the same paramanus. The same happens with the other jivas too. Thus, what can be inferred after deliberating over the relation of a jiva and paramanu-absorption, is that none of the paramanus that a jiva absorbs, as many times and in as many forms is ever

Page #449
I am the Soul 799 a fresh one. For, they have been absorbed and released by somebody or this jiva itself. How can that, which has been used and discarded by one, be ever called fresh? That is to say, a jiva never gets fresh stuff. Here Srimadji's statement is proved true. He has said - sakala jagata te eMThavata What is aintha - left-over? In our practical world, if someone leaves behind half-eaten food, and it remains in the plate, that is called ainthu. If one uses it, touches it, eats a little of it and leaves the rest, then it is ainthu - left-over. Now the leftover may well be very tasty, may be something that the mind loves, may be very expensive, but once it has become a leftover not even a common man would eat it. It is consigned to garbage. There some beggar or a crow or a dog might eat it, but no worthy person would ever. Why, howsoever hungry one might be, one will not eat leftovers. Brothers! I ask you, if you are passing by a marriage hall and out there in the garbage is lying a piece of a sweet or savoury that you like very much, would you pick it up and eat it? No, never! Looking at it, instead of your mouth watering, you might even develop nausea. You may not even like to see it. Ah! Not just that! You take lunch in the morning and leave behind some food, and if the same plate is brought to you in the evening with the same leftover food along with some more fresh ones, would you like it? No! Leftover is absolutely discarded. Whether it is left by us or by others. It is not eaten at all. You train your young innocent child the same way, don't you? "Son, never eat leftovers! If you really think over, even a beggar would not be as pleased to eat leftovers as he would be with fresh food that you offer. The poor fellow is helpless, the fire in his stomach is raging, does not get any food anywhere, cannot bear the hunger, so he

Page #450
800 I am the Soul rummages through the garbage and eats leftovers. But in reality, even he does not like to eat such food. So it is proved that the entire human race despises leftovers, hates leftovers. They do not like leftovers. Whatever be the worries, but leftovers are not wanted! Srimadji is aware of this state of mind in the humans. That is why he has compared the transitions of the inanimate world with leftovers, and has struck a massive blow on our desire and possessiveness, on our ego and conceit. The entire world is like a leftover substance taken and left by some jiva because of the transitions of the paramanus. All substances coming to you, whether they are costly or insignificant, are all somebody's leftovers. Whether it is a diamond worth 125,000 brought and fixed into a ring, worn on a finger and flashed around, or a bungalow costing a million where you live in pride, whether you are walking in the clouds wearing a 2,000 worth saree, or you have just gobbled rich food with some thirty-two varieties and are now making fun of the poor, whether you are blinded with the wealth worth billions that you have amassed, it is all leftover in the plate! Nothing better! Brothers! Just try telling a person who is making faces looking at a beggar eating leftovers, that whatever you are enjoying, thinking it to be fresh, and are wallowing in pride, is all leftovers. There is no difference in that beggar and you. He is eating leftovers and so are you. Why, what he has is the leftover from one person, but what you are taking has been released infinite number of times by infinite jivas of the entire world. Then what are you proud of? If you understand this principle, then all the moha that we have for the poudgalika substances, and the pride we harbour after acquiring them, are both demolished in one moment. How can one, who is truly a jnani person, who has understood the

Page #451
I am the Soul 801 depth of the transitions of the paramanus, ever desire pudgals and be proud of his ownership over them? Man is establishing ownership over many substances; if someone challenges the claim, he establishes it with force. Ah! He even steps into a court to prove his ownership. But the entire world is like a dream. Not even one paramanu in this universe has ever belonged to anyone, neither will it ever. One jiva has a time limit of living with a paramanu, lives only as long together and then invariably falls apart. How can ownership be possible there? Srimadji has compared the substances in the material world with dreams. Do the substances seen in a dream ever belong to anybody? Can these substances ever offer happiness? Can satisfaction be experienced ever? Brothers! You may have seen sometimes in your dreams that you have had a very rich meal. Do you wake up and inform at home that you are not going to eat that day, that your stomach is full because you ate in your dreams? No, food from your dreams cannot fill your stomach. The poverty of one who has become a king in his dreams does not diminish. The mind does not get satisfied with the joy experienced in the dreams. For, dreams are not a reality. Similarly, the paramanus of the world do not get satisfied with such transitions. Atma is chetan, while the world is jada. The chetan is satisfied with feelings of chetan, and not with feelings of jada. Jada feelings are of a changing nature, but the pure chetan atma holds the power of infinite happiness. One who learns to obtain joy from the chetan, from the atma, will never be short of joy. The joy of atma is such a kalpavriksha - wish tree - which never enters fall. It is always in spring. It is always in full bloom. Brothers! That is why Srimadji says that one, who has recognised the feelings of the material world to be like leftovers or dreams, is a true jnani. Rest are all pseudo-intelligent. They say one thing and do another. Unless there is a disinterest within

Page #452
802 I am the Soul towards pudgal substances, the knowledge is only expert oratory, and nothing more. Now, telling us who can certainly attain moksa, Srimadji says - sthAnaka pAMca vicArIne, chaThe varte jeha; und Penna viam, quife HGE .....888 Six statements were discussed in the Atmasiddhi Shastra. 1. Atma exists, 2. It is eternal, 3. It is a doer of karma, 4. It suffers the fruit of karma, 5. Atma can attain moksa, and 6. The means to moksa. These six statements were explained for the benefit of the curious jivas, in a very elaborate way. Five among them are to be thought over, and one is to be acted upon. Ifafter understanding the first five statements and a deep contemplation done over it, the mysteries of the atma begin to unravel before our eyes. Thinking is a very important spiritual activity, which is in the form of thought. As the contemplation of the jiva begins to clarify about each substance, the magnanimity of thoughts, the generosity of action and purity of feelings begins to grow. This purity is itself the diminishing of attachment and aversion. The diminished attachment and aversion create a unique and favourable situation for the devoted pursuit of the ratnatraya. As a result, the jiva goes on progressing on the moksa path. Here too, the same thing has been said, that if the jiva's efforts towards attaining moksa, in the form of the sixth statement, go on progressing, then moksa, in the form of the fifth statement, will certainly be attained. The devoted pursuit of moksa is a relative state. In spite of it being the original state of the jiva, it is essential to pursue the three gems. Therefore, there is first the vichar state - contemplative state and then the dhyan state - meditative state. Srimadji has,

Page #453
I am the Soul 803 therefore, placed a great importance on 'vichar in Atmasiddhi Shastra. The state of thinking, which begins, with the thought of attaining the atma, allows the thought of atma to sprout in the own atma. Thereafter, a quest for the path told in the scriptures awakens in a dispassionate feeling. This dispassionate state can understand the background of the goal of the atma in a proper way. And the firm belief, in the unity of the path of moksa, that it is the same at all times, that there is no other path, stabilises within the jiva. This may be called a good thought. Once good thoughts awaken, the jiva on the path of progress begins to go deeper into introspection to experience the principles in a proper way. In doing so the jiva becomes aware of the difference between jada and chetan. Going beyond that, it gets a proper understanding of all the six statements in its thoughts. Once this is done, the great benevolent Gurudev passes the order that, "just as you have introspected to understand the six statements, if you think about the sat-chid-ananda true form of the atma and stabilise within, then you will also realise the atma. The thoughtful state of the magnanimous sadhaka who has realised the soul, develops the ability to perceive all faiths from the anekanta viewpoint and accommodates all within the self. And ultimately that stage arrives where the state of thinking is transformed into the state of meditation. A proper analysis of the five statements and meditation help attain moksa that is in the form of the fifth statement. Thus, the thought process that has begun with the quest for the goal of the atma, transforms into a tremendous effort for the attainment of moksa and brings the experience of the infinite bliss of moksa. Thus, Srimadji removes the doubt from all the mumukshus by unambiguously stating that the jiva in devoted pursuit of the path of moksa certainly attains it. He unhesitatingly tells us that

Page #454
804 I am the Soul if there is thinking with faith followed by conduct, then attainment of moksa is certain. Now, ultimately where Srimadji dedicates his own faith remains to be seen ..

Page #455
In spite of the body, the state of those ... The superior-most fruit of the devoted pursuit of the three gems is nirvana, freedom from body, absolute purity, and ultimate transformation of the fundamental form of the atma. First there is freedom within the body and then there is freedom beyond the body. This devoted pursuit transforms the sadhaka into the sadhya - the goal and provides siddhi - attainment. That is also the ultimate and supreme goal of the jiva. Those who have attained this goal, who have awakened the state of the supreme soul, are always worthy of salutation. At the outset of Atmasiddhi Shastra, Srimadji saluted such a Sadguru who had attained the inner state of atma. As I had mentioned on the very first day, that any treatise begins with an invocation. The devotion of the Indian mind desires to dedicate its faith towards the Ishta, the one prayed to. Indeed, the invocation is done with a noble intention that the treatise may be completed without hindrances. Therein the composer of the Shastra dedicates his faith at the feet of his propitiated God. He renunciates his own ego and possessiveness. He even places the treatise at the feet of the Ishta. Thus, naturally the responsibility of protecting those who have sought refuge, goes on to the Ishta deva. The first invocation was done after saluting the Sadgurudev. A salutation was offered in appreciation of his munificence, at the valued feet of that Sadguru with whose unlimited benevolence the atma was realised, the self attained the self, the infinite sorrows of sansar came to an end. Similarly, the Indian tradition offers a benediction - mangal prayer at the end of a treatise too. The composer of the Shastra is overwhelmed within with the feeling of devotion as a result of the happy and impedance-free completion of that mammoth task undertaken, and bows down with inner faith.

Page #456
806 I am the Soul The proper faith that prevailed within Srimadji is seen here. He had said in the initial pages pratyakSa sadguru sama nahIM, parokSa jina upakAra In proving this statement, if he had saluted the Sadguru at the outset, he now salutes the Jinavar while making the closing invocation. He dedicates his total faith at the feet of the Jineshwar. The benevolence of the Jineshwar Prabhu has filled his heart. He has experienced the unlimited compassion of the Jinavar. Others cannot feel what has been felt from experience; as such what will the others know? Today there are many who have forgotten the Arihant Parmatma and the Sarvajna, and are blowing their own trumpets. However, they do not know of the unlimited benevolence of the Sarvajna on the spiritual path. Brothers, think! Who gave us all those spiritual treatises through which we are able to know the true original form of our utma, through which we can find the means for self-realisation, through which we can attain the path of devoted pursuit? Who made us aware of all these principles? Our infinitely benevolent omniscient Supreme Souls have told us all that, in the form of principles, devoted pursuit and the path, which they saw, understood, believed and experienced in their knowledge. Here one fact is worth considering. In the Antakrutang Shastra, there is a mention of the effort of 90 jivas for the attainment of kevaljnana. These jivas attained kevaljnana through their purushartha. The moment they attained kevaljnana, their four aghati karmas were destroyed and they immediately attained moksu. Such jivas are called Antakruta Kevalis. They saw and experienced the entire universe in their kevaljnana, they scrutinised all the dravya-guna-paryayas, but they were not left with any time to offer a discourse after attaining kevaljnana. As a result, they could not tell anybody else about their experience.

Page #457
I am the Soul 807 Now, just think! If all the kevalis were to attain moksa like this then who would give us the principles? There is no totality in any knowledge other than kevaljnana. The power to perceive all the bhavas of the Loka-Aloka is there in kevaljnana alone. All other jnanas, whether Avadhijnana or Manahparyavajnana are all incomplete. They are all equivalent of an infinite part of kevaljnana. Therefore, nobody else can narrate the complete knowledge of atma and other substances like the kevaljnani Bhagawant. So the question is whether we would have had these spiritual Shastras that we have now, if all kevali paramatmas were to be Antakrut Kevalis and would have proceeded to attain moksa immediately after kevaljnana. We would not have been able to attain the path of moksa. The path, which the Sadgurudeva has indicated, is also based on the principles propounded by the Jineshwar Bhagawant. The tradition that has been coming from Bhagawan Rishabhdev's times, has been continuing unbroken for more than millions of years. The credit for this goes to Jineshwar Bhagawant. Therefore, we are infinitely indebted to them. That is why, Srimadji while finishing this grantha, dedicates his own faith at the feet of Jineshwar Prabhu in this final gatha deha chatAM jenI dazA, varte dehAtIta, te jJAnInA caraNamAM, ho ! vaMdana agaNita.... 142 Aha! What an unparalleled state! In spite of having a body - deha, if one does not have an awareness of it, it is a state beyond the body dehatit state. The body is there on account of the previous karmas, it has its own dharmas, it has its own natural transformations. The atma is locked within this body. It cannot escape until the release of this body. In spite of all this, the atma is beyond the thought of the body. The body exists but the feelings for it do not. The body existing is one thing, while the awareness of the body existing is another.

Page #458
808 I am the Soul All sansaric jivas have a body. Only the Siddhas do not have one. What is a body or a state beyond a body to those who do not have a body at all? Nothing. Those who do not have a body do not have any feeling or lack of feeling towards it. Therefore, Srimadji has taken into consideration the state beyond the body in the Arihant Bhagawan with a body and not the Siddha Bhagawant without a body, while offering his salutation. The Arihant paramatma also has the same kind of body as any common sansaric jiva, made from audarik pudgals, and endowed with the disposition of decay, degeneration and destruction. All other sansaric jivas have a feeling of the body along with the body. That is to say, they have an ability to feel the happiness and sorrow of the body as their own. They can feel the transformations taking place in the body. They have a joy or sorrow for the beauty or ugliness of the body. The ratiarati of the healthiness or unhealthiness of the body affects them. Thus, the mohaniya types connected with the body are the feeling of the body - dehabhava. Those jivas who are not free from the illusion of atma, who have not yet given up the concept that body is the soul, continue to remain in dehabhava. But after the illusion is dispelled, and after the awareness that 'I am the soul' occurs, the dehabhava gradually declines. Even after the attainment of Samyak darshan, there may be a faint presence of dehabhava, yet the jiva partially experiences the state beyond the body. However, it is not continuous. It occurs sometimes, and does not at other times, because the charitra mohaniya is not completely destroyed. Unless the charitra mohaniya is completely destroyed, the state beyond the body does not arrive. Arihant paramatma has completely uprooted mohaniya; as a result their state beyond the body is natural. Srimadji salutes such Arihant Jineshwar in whom prevails this natural state beyond the body..

Page #459
I am the Soul 809 Here a question arises as to why Srimadji, while saluting the Arihant Paramatma, did not recall any of his other qualities except the dehatit state? The ananta chatushtaya of the Arihant Parmatma are awakened. In addition, there is also the rise of the infinite characteristics like anant kshama, anant santosh, anant nirved etc., which are not only worthy of our respect and salutation, but are also to be emulated. Then why did Srimadji not give an importance to any one of those and picked up only the dehatit state? Srimadji is placing this Shastra before jivas like us who possess a body, in whom there lies dehabhava. In our soul too, there are the same qualities as those in the Arihant paramatma. His qualities are expressed, while ours are concealed. These qualities being concealed cannot be experienced. But our body and the dehabhava is so expressed that it can be experienced every moment. The dehabhava does not disappear even for a moment. Whether in sleep or awakened state, the transformations taking place in the body are experienced. Anything that happens even in the minute-most pore of the body is immediately registered. The joy or sorrow arising out of that is experienced. But we are unaware as to who it is that experiences. If we look a little deeper and think, then we realise that the one who realises the vibrations in the body is somebody else. And we understand that it is different from the body. However, we do not look deep. We think only on superficial levels. Hence, we do not come out of the dehabhava. Thus there is a constant feeling of the deha. That feeling is the deha-adhyas. As long as the deha-adhyas is not removed, the atma cannot proceed on the path of progress. Therefore, Srimadji has referred to the dehatit state of Arihant, firstly to draw us away from the dehabhava and start us off on the path of spiritual progress, and secondly, because we recognise the body very well, to tell us that it is equally essential to recognise the dehatit state too.

Page #460
810 I am the Soul Indeed, jivas like us, who remain in dehabhava always, must be wondering how this dehatit state is attained. "How can the body be denied while it is present? How can one believe that the body is not there even while it exists? How can one remain aloof from the pain and agony that is happening in the body? How can the feeling of happiness and sorrow be avoided?' These questions are apt for all of us. But the sages too have given an equally apt reply to those questions. They have experienced, believed and they tell us the same that the jiva experienced the joys and sorrows of the body etc., infinite number of times in the infinite past, but that has not benefitted the jiva at all. All these experiences were momentary and perishable. Once the jiva has experienced the atma, then the infinite experiences of the body-happiness become inferior. Once the jiva stabilises in the experience of the self, it does not ever want to go away, whatever may happen to the body then. Someone may apply the paste of cool sandal or hundreds of scorpions sting together; all that is taken in the stride. To an atma which is immersed in the experience of the self, these experiences of joys and sorrow of the body are totally insignificant. They do not notice this at all. The ecstasy of selfrealisation is unique. Therefore, such experienced sages tell us to relinquish the vargana of the body. The atma needs to stay in the body. However, if it does not retain the vargana of the body, it is in its own bliss despite being in the body by going beyond it. As long as the seed of coconut is attached to the shell with vargana, it cannot express its independent entity. However, when it breaks away from the shell and dries up the juices of vargana, it can immediately show the external world that it has a separate existence, despite being packed within the shell. When you pick up a mature coconut and shake it, you cannot miss the fact that the seed is independent inside.

Page #461
I am the Soul 811 Well, similarly, one who has relinquished the vargana of the body, in spite of being a resident in it, experiences one's own independent existence. This state is the dehatit state. The incessant experience of the true eternal form prevails. The jnayaka bhava of the atma is only in experiencing its self. Srimadji salutes innumerable times at the feet of such a jnani the supreme soul Shri Arihant Bhagawan. In the first invocation he saluted the inner feeling of the atma and in the end another invocation salutes the feeling of the supreme soul. How many salutations? Not hundreds, thousands, lakhs or crores, but innumerable. Prabhu! Your vibhuti is infinite, salutations to you are infinite. When does ananta-vandan occur? Only when the ego within is totally diminished. Srimadji accepts servitude at the feet of the Jineshwar and offers innumerable salutations. Indeed, what respect towards the Jineshwar! Only the heart of those who have got the greatness of Jineshwar settled in their heart, can bow at the feet of the Jineshwar and not at those of others. Srimadji has dedicate his own faith and devotion at the feet of the Jineshwar. That is it! Atmasiddhi Shastra ends here with the offering of prayers at the feet of Jinavar. We have analysed this Shastra for four months here. The thoughts in this Shastra are very sombre and cryptic. Every word of that person who composed this Shastra is coming from his own self-experience and it is valuable. If a chhadmastha (ajnani) and alpa jnani jiva like I, tries to unravel such a deep grantha, there are bound to be inaccuracies in it. It is but natural that I could not do full justice to the thoughts in this Shastra. After all our intellect has a limit and the thoughts in the Shastras are unlimited. How can one with limits describe the unlimited? Therefore, if there has been any lapse while expressing the wonderful thoughts in the Shastras, I take this occasion of the ending of the Shastra to seek pardon at the feet of Sri Jineshwar.

Page #462
812 I am the Soul What a strange coincidence on this auspicious day, that we have completed the study of the composition of the great Srimad Rajachandraji, today, which also happens to be his birth anniversary. Srimadji has taken birth on this earth and benefitted the consciousness of the public to a great extent. He himself attained the fact of the soul and opened up the path for others. The greatest benevolence he has done us is the simplification of the principles propounded by the Jineshwar from the viewpoint of language. He has offered the same to us in the form of poetry, letters or maxims, which a common man can easily understand. Indeed, for those in whom the mumukshuta is awakened, Srimadji's literature is really helpful. A person who evaluates Srimadji's literature in an impartial state without any coercion, will be able to rise above attachment and aversion. The deep study of the Shastras, relinquishing the tradition of ego, can be certainly helpful to a jiva. Like the Atmasiddhi Shastra, he has one more unique poetic composition - apUrva avasara guNasthAna kramAroha -. That too is greatly beneficial to a jiva desirous of spiritual progress. It is highly necessary that all jivas should listen to, think and learn Srimadji's Shastras. One more thing ... We have read it at many places in the literature of Srimad Rajachandra, but I shall relate my experience. In 1973, I was at Matunga, Mumbai for my Chaturmas. I was then writing my thesis, which also included Srimadji's literature. To know more about Srimadji, I went to his daughter Jawalba at her residence. She was old and unwell, yet she welcomed me with love and enquired about my welfare. When I told her that I needed to know something about the personal life of Srimadji, she was greatly pleased. But Jawalba had been very young during the lifetime of Srimadji. She admitted this and told me that it was not possible for her to know him from that viewpoint. However, she said, "I remember but one incident from when I was about 8 or 10 years

Page #463
I am the Soul 813 old. Father had finished food and was strolling in the verandah outside. I went there and noticed tears in his eyes. I did not like it and asked him the reason for the tears. I was a kid, would he tell me? Then I went in and brought along my grandmother from the room within. Grandmother saw the tears and asked, "Bhai! You are shedding tears? What is the reason?' Father replied and I recollect that answer even till date. He said, "Mother! Jain dharma has been made into pieces. How many are the matas, paths and cults within? All believe their own community to be true and try to prove the others as false. Such is the growth of aversion and jealousy in the name of dharma. dharma is not something that you can tie up in your back-yard. dharma is all encompassing. It is not in the cult, but in the atma. Today the stubborn jivas do not understand and I am sorry about that. Those are the tears that have come to my eyes.' Jawalba said, "I may have got the words different, but the feelings were certainly these.' Brothers! This is the matter heard directly form Srimadji's daughter. Such lofty thoughts of Srimadji should be the goal for all of us. He has repeatedly written in his letters etc., 'I am not in any gachcha or sect; I am in the atma.' Let us also desire to live in the soul and not in some mata, sect or community. Let us give shape to Srimadji's feelings. Today is also the birth anniversary of another great man. That is Mahapran Lonkashah. Almost 500 years ago this person studied the Shastras deeply and exploded the true principle and held the red light before the people. He removed with a great effort the laxity that had crept into the Sadhu samaj and the shravaka samaj. He presented a fail-safe pattern for conduct and established the Sthanakavasi tradition. Lonkashah too had been a very benevolent experience. Let us remember such great people and offer them our hearty homage today.

Page #464
814 I am the Soul Today I want to place before you my small expectation from you, at the end of this Chaturmas. I had told you on the very first day of Chaturmas, that I wanted a Gurudakshina from you, in the age old Indian tradition of Rishis and Munis. Not in reciprocation of my serving you such a wonderful spiritual treatise, but as a fruit of our daily mantra - 'I am the Soul'. We have everyday contemplated on 'I am the soul for ten minutes after the discourse, so that all of you may awaken the same goal within you. Let there be an awareness in your minds, let this call "I am the soul be echoing in every pore on you. Please try! I only desire that you experience 'I am the soul'. Those who make a tremendous effort - purushartha, will certainly be successful. That is all! I close this discourse with a demand for gurudakshina in the form of your experiencing "I am the soul'.

Page #465
Jain Educationa International Silent delineation... The unwavering, true experience of 'I am the Soul' the excellent progressive detachment in the Sadhaka state... the Upadhyaya mode absorbing the unravelled mysteries of the voice of Veetaraaga... followed by the Acharya mode, as if representing the Arihants... various modes being attained one after the other in the Sadhaka state... with the tearing-off of the veil of moha, the transparent crystal-like brilliant state of Arihant... attainment of complete progress of the atma while in the body... and then the Siddha state in the form of freedom from the bondage of the body... the gradual progress of the atmic state... the sparks emanating from the developed chetana flying in all directions... the glow of the atma in the form of attainment of the supreme state of the six statements... the glow of the soul encompassing the soul as if saying 'I am the Soul'. For Personal and Private Use Only

Page #466
e