JAINA Convention 1993 07 Pittusburgh

Author(s): Federation of JAINA
Publisher: USA Federation of JAINA

Page 65

I. Relationships:
Good relationships evolve. They are life-sustaining and lifeenhancing. What is Love? What is Marriage? Is it essential? There are no marriages among animals. But (hu)man is a social animal. Is there a purpose in marriage? Is it for happiness? Happiness is a state of mind. It is not what you have, but what you are. Here is an attempt to clarify the nebulous thought process, accepting the fact that each human being is different. No two individuals are identical.
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II. Marriage:
Marriage is the union of persons of opposite sex, forming new family, sanctioned by custom and religion. From the primitive ages to the present civilization, it passed through various stages in recorded history.
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MARRIAGE, AN ART IN HUMAN RELATIONSHIP
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Exogamy:
Marry outside the Clan.
III. Love:
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Endogamy:
But marry within the Tribe.
Polygamy:
Marriage of one man to more than one wife. Polyandry: Marriage of one woman to more than one husband.
What are the Elements of Love?
Monogamy: Marriage of one man to one wife. This is the prevalent form as per civil code in civilized societies where Rule of Law prevails.
Intimacy:
The feelings that promote closeness. Passion:
The feeling of intense longing.
Commitment: The feelings for the other over an extended period of time.
What role these elements play in different relationships?
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Relationship
Casual
Enduring Friendship
Infatuation
Romantic Love Empty Love Companionate Love Consummate Love
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Intimacy Passion Commitment
IV. The Institution of Marriage:
It is much more than Consummate Love. It has a Purpose, Procreation. Husband and wife make a Couple. Husband, wife, and child/ren make an Institution of Family. It has Cultural Values- morals/principles, purposes, and the Goal.
V. The Institution of Family:
The Four Purposes of Life are fulfilled through Family:
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Dharma: Ethical perfection. Artha: Material prosperity.
Kama: Joyous family life.
Moksha: Liberation.
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What makes an Ideal Family? A family blessed with the following:
i. Asha (Optimism): Hope for a joyous Future.
ii. Pratiksha (Waiting): A blend of perseverance
VI. Four Stages (Ashramas) of Life as per Vedas:
Brahmacharyashram: Learning while one is a
Bachelor.
Grihasthashram: Fulfilling the duties of a household (family) layman.
Vanaprasthashram: Recede and Retire.
Sanyasashram: Detach and Renounce the world.
7TH BIENNIAL JAINA CONVENTION - JULY 1993
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with patience.
Sangata (Good Company): Satsang.
Sukarma (Righteous Actions): Amass the wealth of meritorious deeds for the good of the people. v. Dana (Charity): Share the Wealth, Knowledge, and talents to bring the light of hope where there is darkness and despair.
vi. Atithya (Hospitality): Serve every Guest.
The crucial smooth transition from the first to the second stage happens through Marriage. The Commonalities of Chemistry, Comfort, Compatibility, and Character should be the basis of
"In the Jewish religion we believe that in every man you can find the same living spirit as in animals, namely the divine."
-Shear-Yashuv Cohen Chief Rabbi of Haifa
www.jamemorary.org