JAINA Convention 1993 07 Pittusburgh

Author(s): Federation of JAINA
Publisher: USA Federation of JAINA

Page 73

nity has failed in terms of teaching us how to live our daily lives in terms of utilizing Jainism to deal with the issues that are in all of our heads, but those that we are all afraid to address.
• YOUTH SUPPLEMENT.
Communication is lacking in two main areas- at home between parents and their kids, and in the type of education that kids receive from their religious society. Parents need to engage in interactive communication with their kids. An example of this would be to ask your kids what they think is right or wrong instead of only telling them what you think. By interacting in this way, the kids will learn more and remember it longer. For young children, the parents are responsible in terms of starting the communication. However, college age youths should really try to talk to their parents, even if you know that they have views different from yours. It is important to let your parents know who you are and what things are important to you. Communication between parents and their kids is effective when both sides are willing to listen to the other's point of view. It is effective when the fear of what will they think is removed from the situation. Jainism teaches us to be open and honest, to avoid or minimize mental and verbal violence. The times when these types of violence is most often witnessed is when people are being stubborn, rigid, and close-minded.
Our Jain societies educate us about Jainism by inviting guru's, swami's, learned scholars, etc... to come and speak to us. I honestly feel that most kids cannot relate to these scholars who basically study Jainism and spend much of their time in India. What I think we need is education in Jainism in terms of the basic principles, fundamentals, goals, and ideas. Then we need people to talk to us about how to apply our learned Jain principles to issues in our daily life. At this time I know of only one man that has achieved this. Pravin Shah from Raleigh, North Carolina came to the Atlanta Jain Society about one year ago and he taught youths 15 and up for two days. The first day he clearly told us that we were going to learn the Fundamentals of Jainism and that later we would apply these fundamentals to any and all issues that the youth wanted to bring up. The next day we covered topics such as abortion, the death penalty, suicide, etc... using the principles of purusharth, nimit, upadan, and the karma theory. I learned more that day and remember it more than anything I learned from the visiting scholars in eight years.
feel that there is a need for both types of scholars. Parents can fulfill the role to some degree that Pravin uncle did for me on a daily basis. He was an excellent listener, someone you could argue with and challenge without fear. It is easy to say that we should all com
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municate openly and honestly, but doing it is difficult. The point is that we should all try ti do so with your parents, friends, and siblings. It is healthy to challenge, argue, and discuss ideas with others, that is what the learning process is all about.
If you take nothing else from this essay, please take the following:
The uncertainty in the end product of all your hard work and sacrifice is the beauty and joy in discovering that I am not like you. I am of your flesh and blood, but not of your mind and opinions. I am me, and not always the me that you would like to see. Ask yourself only one question, and please be honest with yourself. Would you like me to be a carbon copy of you, or even to accept your ideas and principles without questioning them myself as if I had no mind of my own; or would you rather I educate myself as much as possible through you and others, and then evaluate what I think is right and wrong? I realize that you will always be my parents and will therefore feel the need to protect and shelter me, and that you will always see me as your little girl. We cannot choose our parents or our children, but we can choose our friends, therefore I want you to see me as a friend, to choose me as a friend, and to treat me as an equal in ability to think and make decisions. I will always need and value you, I hope that you will one day see me in the same way.
Dedicated to my parents, Jiten and Niru Shahfor their patience, understanding, love, and
communication
Special thanks to my cousin Jina Shahfor inspiring me to be the best and to question. and to think and to never believe in failure.
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