JAINA Convention 1993 07 Pittusburgh

Author(s): Federation of JAINA
Publisher: USA Federation of JAINA

Page 71

Education in Jainism: Not Enough for the Real Would
YOUTH SUPPLEMENT.
by Jugna Shah, Atlanta, Georgia
It is another Sunday and we are off to the Jain Society meeting. This week another guru is going to speak to us about the importance of naokar mantra. How many times have kids asked to stay at home, or told you that the program was boring. They are telling you something. Please listen to them.
You tell your 18 year old daughter that her ideas are weird and different and that she is only going through a rebellious stage. Your daughter tells you that she is not trying to be rebellious, but that these are her ideas. Why don't you hear what she is trying to tell you. Please listen.
Your mom tells you that you cannot wear a bikini to the beach. You do not understand why and you think that your mom is un-cool. Do you bother to understand that she has her reasons and that maybe the two of you could talk about them and make a compromise? Please listen to one another.
You do not understand them and they do not understand you. This is the root to every problem that we face. This is the starting point and we must all first recognize the existence of this problem and then address it together.
The above examples illustrate how we are not communicating and, how we do not stop to listen to one another, and how close-minded we can be. The issues that parents and youths seem to be facing are not inherent to only Jain youths, they are issues that all first-generation cultures face, and they seem to be born out of fear. The fear of losing one's culture, religion, language, heritage etc... These are the parents fears. The children's fears are a little harder to define. They have to do with wanting to retain the things that parents what them to retain, while struggling to balance that with the messages that they receive from school, the radio, television, magazines, college, friends, etc... The answer is not to shelter the children, because that will only make matters worse in the future. However, the best method of protection that a parent can give a child is that of knowledge. As in Jainism, the guru's teach us that we must acquire a certain amount of knowledge which we will use as our base to learn and understand more. In giving children Jainism, I think parents forget or just do not want to face the other issues that children face each day.
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JAINA TIMES
The answer to why effective communication is not Occurring is simple. We are all too afraid to talk to one another openly. Parents fear talking about issues such as dating, marriage, sex, homosexuals, abortion, racism, drugs, crime etc... for two main reasons. First, parents do not want to put these ideas into their kids' heads. The problem is that kids are exposed to these things from the time they wake up and go to school to the time they come home and go to sleep after watching TV. You may think that your silence is protecting your child from all of these evil things, but it is not. The second reason for parental fear is that everyone thinks that bad things don't happen to their kids, or that their kids are straight and have no problems or concerns. I can understand this mentality because I have a younger brother and I often think that these issues won't affect his life. I am wrong, as are parents who do not communicate with their children because by not talking about these things we are keeping these kids in the dark. Kids will be exposed to these things at school, but that should not be their first exposure. They should know that they can talk to their family without their parents getting angry or ignoring their children's questions. That is the fear that kids have.
Parents are not the only ones that have a fear of communication, children, youths, and young adults also suffer from fear. However, their fears are different from the parents' fear. My inspiration for this essay came from the fear that I saw among young adults. In talking to various people about writing an essay that dealt with non-traditional issues, I began to see a trend of fear. First, there were many women who voiced that they had wanted to write about some issues and concerns that are very important to them, however they were sure that society would be angry and that they and their family would have to suffer because society would make it difficult for them. It seems clear that they were afraid. They knew that society would not be able to tolerate unconventional or non-traditional ideas. Out of this fear and concern for their parents many women did not write essays on topics that need to be talked about. The second incident had to do with a young adult male, whom I do not know very well, but I get the impression that he is an intelligent and concerned individual. After discussing many of my essay ideas with him, I received the warning that I should be careful, that I should not be too liberal or too radical. I got the impression that there were certain topics that I could not discuss because society would become upset. After hearing these types of things from youths my age, I realized that there is a serious problem in our community- the fear of communication, sharing of ideas and concerns, and talking openly about issues. I think that our community has done an excellent job on spreading Jainism and creating more Jain events, but our commu
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