________________
change yourself when you sit down to meditate. Don't take on a holy face, but sit down the way you are. Whether you are happy, unhappy, tired or full of energy, it doesn't matter. Whether you feel restless or dull, sit down and allow the meditation to start with where you are and how you are. If you want something out of the meditation, don't put any fancy pictures between you and what you have to experience! I don't say that you should think in a negative way about yourself. Just practise maha mudra, the greatest attitude, withdraw and don't interfere at all."
I must state this because I have had rather disturbing experiences with people who have mixed this with a therapy called gestalt, where you identify with your thoughts, where you try to awaken the emotions, and it is not good to mix these two. Antar mouna means be the silence, do not interfere at all. It is not a therapy, you are there and you experience life; let life be. You cannot do that in daily life. That is why we need that thing we talked about earlier, the relaxation response.
When you trigger relaxation through a meditation method, and you start with the sounds going around, suddenly your mind relaxes. Then when you allow the thoughts, your mind relaxes a little more. If you cannot relax enough, you can also watch your brcath a little in between. But usually it is enough to just watch the thoughts. Then your state changes, you get into a different state. I like to call it the open state, because it is a state full of possibilities. It is open to creativity, it is open to insights, starting with things that have to do with your daily life.
Many idealistic people think, "Oh, I have to go into the deepest meditation. I can't deal with all these small things." No, don't do that. Let the meditation take its own time, if you want the real meditation experience. Antar mouna is based upon a natural process of the mind. If you allow yourself first to experience the sounds around you, you become secure and then as soon as you are secure, the mind drops its interest and goes in by itself. Then it is in there, and there is enough to do in there.
Notice when you forget the sounds, what makes you forget them? The inner things, you are suddenly engrossed in a thought, or you are having a little emotional drama because of something that happened to you this morning. So, the first
134
Jain Education International
For Private & Personal Use Only
www.jainelibrary.org
