$JES 983 Being Jain In College An Experiential Guide 2nd Edition

Author(s): Sonali Vakharia
Publisher: JAINA Education Committee

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RELATIONSHIPS
Understand your communication style and learn if you and your significant other are speaking the same language. In other words, communication styles are the means of sharing information with others through language.
If a relationship does not work out, do not be disheartened. It's a learning experience. Enjoy yourself and be honest with yourself. If something does not seem right, trust your gut feeling.
From a Jain perspective, being attracted to others, thinking, discussing, or engaging in sensual acts, or wearing indecent clothing which may be attractive to someone else are all considered ways that can harm yourself mentally, physically, and verbally. It helps to keep in mind that you will be a completely different person when you're 25 than when you're 18. Every year that you age, you will change in many ways and by the time you turn 25, the things that were important to you then won't be important to you now. When you were 15, you couldn't wait until you turned 16 to get your driver's license! When you turned 18, you couldn't wait to move out of your home and experience the college abyss. In a similar, but deeper way, the things and qualities you are looking for in a person will change over time as you experience more of the world. A lot of 18-year-old relationships end because they are still changing and not able to maintain the commitment that a longlasting relationship requires. Relationships require maturity to last. People change, values change, futures change, so things may end. Of course, there are always the exceptions, and I have also heard lots of success stories which started out at a young age. It really depends on the maturity level of you and your significant other.
Pre-Existing Relationships If you enter college already in a relationship, things can be very different -- depending on whether your significant other also attends your college. If your relationship is long-distance, talk to them before school starts and set realistic expectations for each other. It's important to keep in touch, but you both need time to focus on school and make new friends Even if your significant other attends the same school as you, do
BEING JAIN IN COLLEGE
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