$JES 983 Being Jain In College An Experiential Guide 2nd Edition

Author(s): Sonali Vakharia
Publisher: JAINA Education Committee

Page 27

RELATIONSHIPS
05 - Relationships During college, whether you're living near or far away from home, it can be harder to avoid peer pressure. There's a lot of pressure in itself of finding a great group of friends in college. In addition, many of your peers may be in relationships or may encourage you to be in a relationship. In a new environment, you may be more inclined to follow your friends' suggestions and behaviors to fit into the group. If you're interested in dating, your peers' comments may be helpful. If you're not interested in dating in college, make sure you know what you want and don't want and respectively assert this to your friends. Your sense of self comes from within and should not be based on the approval of others.
Relationships are a very touchy topic, especially within the Indian community. However, I feel like it's important to discuss because these things are inevitable in college. It's very easy to get influenced or swayed by the opposite gender. You're thrown into an environment where boys and girls spend a lot of time with each other, and there is nobody watching or disciplining you. The way both people treat each other in movies and television shows can be inappropriate, and this behavior is sometimes mimicked by college students looking to express themselves in new - and sometimes destructive - ways. I know this may not apply to everyone, but here's a general reminder. You may feel the need to conform in respect to how everyone is dressing, what they eat or drink, where they go, etc. However, you are your own person, and your choices are valid. When you encounter an uncomfortable or unknown environment/decision, make the choice that is right for you. Create your own style, and be confident with it, and you'll feel comfortable in your own skin. If others don't respect and like you for you, they may not be the crowd you want to associate yourself with. You should feel accepted by those around you.
You should also remember to treat everyone respectfully, we are all humans. Everyone has strengths, weaknesses, goals, unique personalities, feelings, etc. just like you. By treating everyone equally you may create an invaluable friendship which could develop in many directions in the future. Treating someone in a
BEING JAIN IN COLLEGE