$JES 983 Being Jain In College An Experiential Guide 2nd Edition

Author(s): Sonali Vakharia
Publisher: JAINA Education Committee

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RELATIONSHIPS
not be so invested in the relationship that you lose focus on your work and activities and lose the opportunity to make new friends. Remember that you both have important goals, and your relationship should be one that supports those goals, not serves as a roadblock to them. If things aren't going the way you want them to, communication is key. Make sure you build friendships with people you can rely on if you're going through a rough patch in your relationship.
Deciding to Date
If you do decide to date someone, here are some tips. These tips are not just for when you're in college. They can apply any time you are, or are considering being in any sort of relationship.
1. It's best to choose someone with similar values as you. I'm not saying they should be the exact same person as you by any means, because being different teaches you about other aspects of life and more about yourself. What I am saying is that fundamental values should be aligned. Choose someone who makes you better and respects you and your beliefs. Mutual trust, honesty, understanding, etc., are key. You will connect best with someone who shares your values. Long term, you'll have the highest probability of building a worthwhile future because you both may work towards a similar purpose. Short term, you'll have a smoother relationship because you understand each other due to these fundamental similarities in values.
2. Avoid dating if you're doing it because you feel bored or lonely. Everyone gets lonely from time to time, but it is important to find ways to be happy on your own first so that, once a committed relationship does present itself, you can be selfless and committed as well. One of my other favorite quotes: "In order for two halves to be whole, each half must be whole on its own." This quote changed my life which is why I keep myself busy doing what I love and enjoying it. Sometimes, the distraction of dating impedes one from doing their best in school and reaching their career goals.
3. A relationship should be based on mutual understanding,
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BEING JAIN IN COLLEGE