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EVERWAKEFULNESS
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were ascending the hill They were impressed by Gautam and submitted to his discipline Gautam brought them with himself to the Lord They began to move to join the group of enlightened beings Gautam dissuaded them Said the Lord, 'Prevent them not, Gautam They are already enlightened 'i
Gautam lost all patience He failed to cope up with the mystery The initiator was still unlightened and the initiated enlightened A senior initiate was unenlightened and a neoinitiate enlightened! What a system! Gautam was violently perturbed Whom to blame?' he thought 'My Lord does not concede God as the destiny-maker How do I ascribe any partiality to Him? My Lord also does not steer my conscience Thus he also escapes the allegation of partiality, I am my own destiny-maker How can one indict aught in one's own self? By conferring absolute freedom of will on man the Lord has created an insoluble enigma In his attempt to disentangle it, he himself is too entangled to either blame any partiality in his dilemma or importune it for aught My unbegging individuality poses a grave problem for me'
'My Lord! we tread the common path What makes the course of my disciples so short and mine so tediously long?"
The Lord saw how anguished his heart was He addressed himself to Gautam, 'What are you engaged in ?'
'I attempt some introspection 'You find faults with my philosophy or your own progress ?'
'You forbid finding faults with others Hence I scrutinize my own progress'
'Do you know each individual stands this side of the beach confronted with the ocean of ignorance and attachment?'
"I do know, sire'
Do you remember your vow to cross over the ocean and go beyond ?'
'l do, sire' 'What ails you, then ?
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Ibid 155
