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2015 JAINA Convention
Jainism World of Non-Violence
ATTACHMENT AND DETACHMENT by Shrutpragya Swami
A ttachment and detachment are a topic about A which much has been written. In general terms, one can say that by the word attachment is meant having like or dislike and thus being judgemental. Detachment, by contrast, is the re- verse of this being without like or dislike, being judgement-free. However, one may add something more specific here too.
reason I may not be able to tolerate others easily: and I tend frequently, even perhaps continually. to consider myself to be correct in all that I do. In this situation also I may not easily be able to for give others when they criticise or disagree with what I say or do, and I tend to be proud and even perhaps boastful So if someone makes a critical comment of me and I feel insulted and perhaps get angry, for instance, this is a clear sign of the presence of ego and thus it expresses itself as an attachment to me-ness.
from me and clasping it hard against its chest. It was always an amusing experience for me, even when the toy was one of many others and when the child appeared not to be especially interested in it. Afterwards, I would often come to know of how the child would tell its father not to invite the swamiji any more! We have all perhaps witnessed the same or similar situations with children, and it always creates a sense of laughter or amusement in us. However, we as adults are no different: we are still the same, carrying attachment with us. It's no longer the toy, perhaps this has now been re- placed by a house or by a car upon which we have become reliant.
And this continually should be borne in mind. Indeed, one should not talk about dependency here at all. Such wording is wrong or simply misplaced. Rather the term that needs to be invoked to make clear what I am saying is involvement." This means that there is no expectation at all. Hence, when one is involved with the soul expectation does not arise in any form. So my personal mantra always is: "love your own soul" and do this without question or concern.
The first thing one can say is that with attachment, a person cannot live without someone or without some particular object and will tend to keep in mind that person or that object. Attachment may express itself in terms of dependence on material objects, or with dependence on certain thoughts, or may especially arise in the form of what might simply be termed "me-ness." With material things we may think perhaps of money, food, and world- ly pleasures. For example, I may be attached to wanting to increase my personal wealth; I may be attached to certain kinds of food: or I may de- sire to enjoy particular forms of entertainment, such as watching particular TV programmes or films. In all these instances there is dependency on them in some form or other. With attachment to thoughts there is here a focus on ideas, ideas or thoughts that stay with me. For example, if I own a material object such a computer, I may be attached to this in a material sense; but even when it is no longer with me I may still remain attached to the object as an idea. The computer as a mate rial object is outside, apart from me, but the idea of it still persists, wanting to use it or desiring to be working with it.
When it comes to attachment to others, we might consider, for instance, a person who is living with me. That person may be a spouse, a son, a daughter, or a friend. I may not feel ordinarily any kind of dependence on that person. However, if that same person then goes away possibly to study abroad, for example, or to do a job of work in another place, and I then feel sadness or loneliness or begin to miss that individual when he or she is absent, this is a certain sign that attachment to that person is present. Attachment in this situation involves a type of possessiveness one might say, and this is at the heart of what is meant by attachment.
So one may ask, "How can one become free from attachment?" We can see with all the examples I have given that attachment itself brings only suf- fering and misery. If I am not attached to my wife and I later get a divorce, then suffering will not emerge. If the reverse is true that I get a divorce when I am still attached to my now ex-wife-great suffering arises. The same is true with material possessions like a house, a car, a computer (or an iPad, iPhone, Tablet, or whatever the latest new electronic gadget might be). One should not be at- tached to anything, therefore, as in every instance we have transitoriness and misery. Change or im- permanence is the nature of everything: so attach- ment can only lead to suffering
If you love others with expectation, it is a sign of attachment. However, if you love others without expectation, this is compassion. Here you have a feeling of wanting to help or aid them, without desiring anything in return. If your love extends to all living beings, it is non-attachment. Often people ask me why I left my family to become a monk, even though I was still a very young man at the time of my renunciation. My answer to them was that I was not losing a family but extending it to all the world and to all living beings. For if one is focused upon the narrow group of one's immediate family members, attachment will naturally arise. One should love one's family, but in terms of what I have been saying it can lead also to strong bonds of attachment with them. On the other hand, if one's family is the world of all liv ing beings, there is love, care and compassion but no attachment whatsoever.
further on this point, it is useful to mention that on a number of occasions when I visited America and was invited into houses to give a talk or to take food with a family, I often saw attachment at work directly with the children in the homes
entered. I would frequently pick up a toy of a particular child and playfully say, "Could I have this please?" or "I like this, may I take it to my own house with me? Immediately the child I did this to became furious, pulling back the toy away
The only constant in the ephemeral nature of the world and one's place within it is the soul. But should one and I have heard the question raised before should one be attached to the atma or the soul? This - a point that needs to be emphasised - is a problem only of language. It is a matter only of words. For with the soul there is no attachment whatsoever because it does not create misery, de pendency or suffering. It brings only happiness, blissfulness and, of course, non-dependency.
Now, I am happy and am indeed delighted - it is my greatest pleasure in fact - to instruct you to love your own soul, as it is without any expectation at all, so that you can then love every one else and also love all living creatures with exuberance, without any expectation or dependency in any form. This is detachment in its fully realised form, and it is a detachment involved with the soul that is pure, loving and completely free.
Attachment to me-ness involves the ego for exam- ple, here I tend to feel superior to others. For this
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