Voyage Within With Vimalajee

Author(s): Pratap J Tolia
Publisher: Vardhaman Bharati International Foundation

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sight! YOU MUST BLOOM AND BLOSSOM NOW. The Jain society, especially Srimad Rajchandraji's followers must do something for your unusual and untiring creations..."
Such a compassion and valuation full words of hers like other Saints and Masters who have blessed us throughout, were more than several rewards! Otherwise and nearby and far-off Indian and Foreign Indian Society- the affluent and un bothering Jain Society? We have never aimed at them for rewards : our rewards have always been in form of the blessings and vouchsafing from the Paramgurus-The Supreme Masters. After all, what rewards this appreciation less society can provide to us, which has on the contrary, acted vice-versa?
And like a flash, a silent series of our untold sufferings, miseries, tests and tribulations of whole life passed off from the screen of my memory. Without expressing them to Deedi Vimalaji, I went on witnessing these all for a while in my inner self, just as a silent detached "spectator", since I had all throughout tried to take these all in this spirit of a "Spectator", these being my KARMAS, my DESTINY...!
This silent screening went on showing the nearby society and echoing and reflecting that, "WHAT THIS NEARBY SOCIETY, THE JAINAND INDIAN SOCIETY, IS GOING TO REWARD ME WHICH HAS CONTRARILY..
1. Firstly condemned my creations, then criticised the same throughout under one pretext or the other and at
the same time, paradoxically went on pirating them (my cassettes) without paying me anything for my
blood-born outcomes, without bothering for the copy rights, taking these acts as their "Birthrights"? 2. "Which has looted, actually broke open the doors, criminally trespassed and then looted away my Chickpet
Bangalore office, bribed the police, played all hook and crook to the extent of bribing the Judges for
defeating my case and had thus kept me away from my job and bread for 14 fourteen years! 3. "...which even after inhabiting in foreign countries as very well to do NRIs has not changed its age old narrow
minded lifestyle and exploiting outlook/attitude. During two of my foreign Programme tours, they cancel my performances at the eleventh hour after reaching their country spending own travel ticket and allied expenses and leave me in unforeseen difficulties miserably to such an extent that during the last visit, amidst such adversities, here at Bangalore, OUR HOPE OF ALL HOPES, Eldest Genius daughter Kum. Parul dies in a motor accident and this "Invited", "Befooled" and "Exploited" Artist (!) has to rush back from New York with great pathos and by collecting from friends the Return travel expenses...! "... Which has, similarly, here in India remained constantly exploiting this humble self beyond limits : at one place they make me spend conveyance and accompanying artists' fees and they themselves disappear, at other place of our so called Religious Jains, who even after performing at their premises free of charge, even do not bother to pay the meagre Rickshaw fares, make me wonder to collect it at their places and paradoxically honour other outside Artists ( Sri Anup Jalota) with one lakh of rupees at Bangalore just last year !! "...Which has, even being so intimate, condemned my editing's of fifty-one strenuous recordings of late Great Gurudeo, services and labour for which I have not charged!!! This shows that the more you serve selflessly, the more you are condemned and exploited. What a wonderful and apt way of 'rewarding"...!! Anyways, let them be forgotten and forgiven, since such are always the ways of the world. But what is more paining and can hardly be forgiven, because, if so, the higher values and ethical moral standards of the society will suffer and the unscrupulous and corrupt will have unchecked free passage, and hence the revolutionary and revolt's in me could not remain, though without hatred and being detached, a silent SPECTATOR and has from time to time, revolted against such a corrupt and Hippocratic society posing itself as BIG under the guises of Religion and Education and Culture and Ideals and so on, which I myself have actually and personally came across. As a result, what is it of use if such a society rewards and values my work(which in fact they cannot) which is "HEART BORN" and "MASTER*GUIDED:GURU-GUIDED". It is for this reason that my posers sprung up from within for such a society round about. So I humbly continued silently with more serious Self-experiences and that too from persons and institutions of so called high status: from the Ashrams and Educational set-ups. My reflections continued more intensely "The nearest and dearest Paramguru-founded Ashram of which I myself have remained a part, even go to the extents of doublestandards and account manipulation and do not be prompt and sincere enough to pass on the legitimate receipts of huge sums, which has for me, not come from the so called "one-two number" incomes, but officially from the blood of dear departed daughter Parul, being donated for a higher cause in her name. What to expect from such a society of our own people?(Religious people)..What to expect from our Capitalist Jain Temple Authorities of Bangalore who bankruptcy run away from making payment of our highly laboured translations done at their orders?
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