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Life of an aspirant
forever. In its place lies the conflict arising from desire, which is akin to the self-inflicted wound. This is just like prāņāyāma done in reverse. In fact, the entire analysis can be simply summed up by the argument that if there is joy in the absence of desire, then why entertain desire at all?
Religious scholars have said that an in-depth analysis of our emotions and desires will reveal that meaningless and petty emotions trouble the mind all the time. Even if we wish to fulfil desires so that there may be peace, only a few can be fulfilled; most desires can never be fulfilled. It is often the case that in the fulfilment of one desire, many new ones emerge. This life is like a palace that has a thousand doors, all of them locked. If a person tries to open the first door, he will find the second one locked. After a lot of effort, he will open the second just to find the third one locked. In this manner, his entire life is spent on opening one door after another. Until finally, in the maze of unlocked doors, the door of death opens before him and he has no choice but to enter it leaving all unopened doors behind.
When Rāvana was lying on his death-bed in preparation for the final departure, he was asked if he had a final wish. He said sadly, “Some desires, some wishes of my life remain unfulfilled, unable to fly, like a broken-winged bird. Now they have to remain within me, tortured. They cannot be fulfilled."
When he was asked what these wishes were, he said:
“It was my desire that fire should burn, but not emit smoke and blackness. It should emit only brightness and light. That gold, which is so beautiful to the sight, should have a lovely fragrance as well. That the salty seas on all the shores of Lanka should have sweet water, so that it can be useful to all.
"There are many more desires, but these three desires are my most cherished ones. I have established my sovereignty from one end of the world to the other. I have created the Lanka of gold and acquired magical powers. And yet, here I lie, waiting for death to free me of the pain caused by my most cherished, unfulfilled desires."
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