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"HOW I LOOK AT MYSELFI" (2)
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ensure harmony. Consider the pros and cons of each move to arrive at a balanced view. And this coordination is possible on the basis of mutual toleration. Without toleration, there can never be any coming together. We have to consider others. Sometimes the father has to accommodate the son; at other times the son has to accommodate the father.
The son said to his father, "Daddy! All this time I have been taking my meals with you, but I'll dine with you no more." The father was a sensible man. He said, "O, sonny, it's all right. All these years you have been taking your meals with me, but from today, it is I who will take my meals with you." Nothing was changed; things continued as before. The father's humorous approach to the problem side-tracked the conflict and brought about harmony.
Acharya Shri Tulsi often says, "Look, a teacher must know when to speak and when to keep silent. It is not necessary that a teacher should always speak. At times it is good to speak, at other times it is good to keep still, to suffer in silence.".
When you consider others, others consider you. But often one does not tolerate anyone. The father knows no toleration nor the mother! But they want the son and the daughter-in-law to show them utmost consideration! It's impossible! To be endured, you have to endure.
Toleration is the fourth principle of 'social living.
The fifth is co-existence – to live together. Co-existence is possible only with the development of coordination, toleration, mutual cooperation and interdependence.
We are discussing the art of thinking. How to look? How to think? What is the right approach to oneself? Our life has two aspects - individual and social. Both these aspects must be kept in view. A partial, one-sided view, whether wholly individual or wholly social, can prove misleading. Consider both aspects together, without any equivocation.
The modern man is a great equivocator. Actuated by selfinterest, he would adopt an individual or socialistic stance to suit the occasion. A man said to another, "O brother! beware of wrong doing! Never be dishonest! Your conduct must be unexceptionable!"
His colieague replied: "Well, It's not me alone; the whole society is corrupt. I can't live in isolation!" Here is an example of an egoist adopting a social stance to serve his own ends.
On another occasion, a man said to his friend, "You've wealth in abundance. People are suffering grievously on account of floods. Why don't you do something?"
The friend said, "Well, each man must endure his fate! What can I, a mere individual, do except take care of myself?"
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