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Anger
Anger
THE WAY MUSLIMS DEAL WITH ANGER
child. Is it good to get angry? No, but it was necessary at the time because if he did not, his son would have strayed in the wrong direction. Consequently, anger is a red signal, nothing else. If the father had not appeared intimidating and had not become angry, he would have lost his son to the path of vice.
Questioner: We take out our anger on the wife when we cannot get angry with the secretary or the nurses at the hospital. She gets the worst part of it.
The people have no idea that anger is a red flag. It is important for one to understand when and for how long this flag has to be utilized.
FROM NEGATIVE TO POSITIVE MEDITATION
If you become angry with your son, your bhaav intention) should be, 'this should not happen'. This means that you have changed negative meditation into positive meditation. Although you were angry, the result turns positive internally because you have changed your true inner intent.
Questioner: Is it because of the bhaav: 'it should not be this way?
Dadashri : There should be no intent to hurt behind it. It is impossible to have anger without the intent to hurt. Amongst all the different situations where anger occurs, it only binds punya when it is directed towards one's children, one's friends and one's wife if the intent to hurt is absent. The reason is clearly visible when one looks at his aim behind his anger.
Dadashri : I tell people in satsang that when their superiors reprimand some men, they vent their anger on their wives instead. So then I rebuke them and ask them why they are taking it out on their poor wives. I ask them why they do not fight with the person that scolds them instead of fighting with their wives?
A Muslim friend of mine invited me to his home, so one day I went with him. He only had two rooms in his house. I asked him how he managed to live in such a confined space. I asked him if his wife ever bothered him. He said that sometimes his wife would get angry but he would not. If they both were to get angry at each other, how would they be able to sleep in the same room? Furthermore, he would not get even a decent cup of tea in the morning. He told me that he was happy to be with his wife, so how could he get angry with her, and when she got angry with him, he would pacify her by sweet-talking to her. He said that he would fight outside the home, but never in the home.
But our men on the other hand, would come home after receiving a mental thrashing outside and pass it on their wives.
So even anger has been divided. It is a different anger when you get angry with your son when he is not paying attention to the business. God has said that when a father gets angry with his son for stealing money and other misdeeds, the father will bind punya.
All day long they are angry. Even the cows and buffaloes are better, at least they do not get angry. Life should be peaceful! It should not be feeble. Anger takes place all too often.
