Jain Study Center NC Raleigh 1997 11 YJA Regional Convention

Author(s): Jain Study Center NC Raleigh
Publisher: USA Jain Study Center NC Raleigh

Page 90

Actions are Stronger than Words
By Dina M. Mehta
Every year, we as Jains, celebrate Paryushan. To most American-born Indians, such as myself, Paryushan is a time when we're not supposed to eat onions, potatoes, and any other vegetable grown underground.
A few years back, I learned that Paryushan is also a time for penance. Prathikraman is a ritual that's purpose is to cleanse one's soul. My only question was how could a simple recitation of words (that I do not understand) be a means of purifying myself?
In 1995 during Paryushan, I fasted for seven days on fluids only. The following year, I fasted for eight days on boiled water. A few months ago, while at school, I fasted for nine days on water. As people learned of my 'starvation,' there were two questions that I was always faced to Answer: one, how do you do it, and two, why do you do it?
Well, first off, it is very difficult getting used to the idea of not consuming anything but water (and a limited amount at that!). But, I learned to keep myself busy. Whether I was doing schoolwork or sleeping, my mind could not be on food. I figured it is kind of wrong for me to fast and think of food all day long! During what seemed like numerous hours of free time, I found myself reading up on Jainism and other religious literature. I started reading a 700-page novel about comparative religion, I learned the English meanings to parts of the Prathikraman, and I learned some Jain stavans. Many of my suitemates at college thought that I would get very ill. However, fasting not only takes a great deal of will power, but one gains such an incredible amount of faith in God. This faith that I attained led me to believe that God would not let me get sick, for my reasons for fasting were holy.
So, that leads me to the next question: why do I fast? Simply because I know I have lots of sins that need to be cleansed from my body. I know I have a lot to be forgiven for. My parents always said to me, "don't say you're sorry unless you mean it." Well, every time I mess up, I can't just say I'm sorry and expect the bad sins to just relinquish them. Fasting is my way of showing God and myself that I am truly sorry, and I do sincerely wish to be forgiven. It is then that my actions are stronger than mere words.
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