Jain Journal 1994 07

Author(s): Jain Bhawan Publication
Publisher: Jain Bhawan Publication

Page 11

KREMSER: JOURNEY TO THE HOME IN THE LOTUS
Then an inner voice said to Rajimati: 'Abandoned, you sought Him from a sultry motive, Of what, your thought? Your thought was of greed, And to the living Wayshower, greed is a raw, ugly violence. And she vowed, "I quit greed for all my time."
And so Rajimati moved on with a well-content face. She had forsaken a self-injury, she felt her path eased, The firethorn of greed was no more.
Yet she began to suffer the broken thread of her dreams. Pulsing heart, returning home, worshipping-all gone, Yet empty of the pure, everlasting viewpoint. Slowly she began to feel a teardrop,
-His ear had opened to the wailing food-animals, While she, simple maiden, had followed her husband. Her turning love, between form and formlessness, So distant the fragrant lotus at the top of the mountain. She could only take a step farther than the step before, She could only see ahead to one certainty,
...Red thorn days, nights with the black stars howling. So she looked down, underfoot, at the path, ...Path of worthy thorns.
Sweet Lotus in Bliss, in Bliss Everliving.
Rajimati held fast, toward the top of the mountain. ...Great silvery mountain, in the spirit floating, Unmindful of the bent, crumbling shadow on its flank, Steepest path, she thought, in my frailest years. She moved upward, the granite boulders did not yield.
Dusk crept up, she saw an overhang of stones. Her goal of a proper cave was a harsh tomorrow upward, While her weary bones were murmuring, 'rest, rest'. So she unrolled her mat. "Lightly", she said,
"You bedding stones, let us press upon each other."
The moon began to rise, light slipped over her. -No rosy fountains, no hand-in-hand, no yesterdays, Nothing but an unartful, timeweary nun In search of the fragrance of the sweet lotus,
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