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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa caudahavAM pravacana 247
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________________ dhamma-sUtra dhammo maMgalamukkiTheM, ahiMsA saMjamo tvo| devA vi taM namaMsanti, jassa dhamme sayA mnno|| dharma sarvazreSTha maMgala hai| (kauna sA dharma?) ahiMsA, saMyama aura taparUpa dhrm| jisa manuSya kA mana ukta dharma meM sadA saMlagna rahatA hai, use devatA bhI namaskAra karate haiN| 248
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________________ tapa ke chaha bAhya aMgoM kI hamane carcA kI hai, Aja se aMtara-tapoM ke saMbaMdha meM bAta kreNge| mahAvIra ne pahalA aMtara-tapa kahA hai - praayshcit| pahale to hama samajha leM ki prAyazcita kyA nahIM haiM to AsAna hogA samajhanA ki prAyazcita kyA hai? aba kaThinAI aura bhI bar3ha gayI hai kyoMki prAyazcita jo nahIM hai vahI hama samajhate rahe haiM ki prAyazcita hai| zabdakoSoM meM khojane jAeMge to likhA hai ki prAyazcita kA artha hai- pazcAttApa, ripeNtteNs| prAyazcita kA vaha artha nahIM hai| pazcAttApa aura prAyazcita meM itanA aMtara hai jitanA jamIna aura AsamAna meN| pazcAttApa kA artha hai-jo Apane kiyA hai usake lie pachatAvA; lekina jo Apa haiM usake lie pachatAvA nahIM, jo Apane kiyA hai usake lie pchtaavaa| Apane corI kI hai to Apa pachatA lete haiM corI ke lie| Apane hiMsA kI hai to Apa pachatA lete haiM hiMsA ke lie| Apane beImAnI kI hai to pachatA lete haiM beImAnI ke lie| Apake lie nahIM, Apa to ThIka haiN| Apa ThIka AdamI se eka choTI-sI bhUla ho gayI thI karma meM, use Apane pazcAttApa karake poMcha diyaa| ___ isalie pazcAtApa ahaMkAra ko bacAne kI prakriyA hai| kyoMki agara bhUleM Apake pAsa bahuta ikaTThI ho jAeM to Apake ahaMkAra ko coTa laganI zurU hogI-ki maiM burA AdamI hUM, ki maiMne gAlI dii| ki maiM burA AdamI hUM, ki maiMne krodha kiyaa| Apa haiM bahuta acche AdamI-gAlI Apa de nahIM sakate haiM, kisI paristhiti meM nikala gayI hogii| Apa pachatA lete haiM aura phira se acche AdamI ho jAte haiN| pazcAttApa Apako badalatA nahIM, jo Apa haiM vahI rakhane kI vyavasthA hai| isalie roja Apa pazcAttApa kareMge aura roja Apa pAeMge ki Apa vahI kara rahe haiM jisake lie kala pachatAe the| pazcAttApa Apake bIiMga, ApakI antarAtmA meM koI aMtara nahIM lAtA, sirpha Apake kRtyoM meM kahIM bhUla thI, aura bhUla bhI isalie mAlUma par3atI hai ki usase Apa apanI imeja ko, apanI pratimA ko jo Apane samajha rakhI hai, banAne meM asamartha ho jAte haiN| ___ maiM eka acchA AdamI hUM, aisI maiM, merI apanI pratimA banAtA huuN| phira isa acche AdamI ke muMha se eka gAlI nikala jAtI hai, to mere hI sAmane merI pratimA khaMDita hotI hai| maiM pachatAnA zurU karatA hUM ki yaha kaise huA ki maiMne gAlI dii| maiM kahanA zurU karatA hUM ki mere bAvajUda yaha ho gayA, insapAiTa Apha mii| yaha maiM cAhatA nahIM thA aura ho gyaa| aisA maiM kara nahIM sakatA hUM aura ho gayA--kisI paristhiti ke dabAva meM, kisI kSaNa ke Aveza meN| aisA maiM hUM nahIM ki jisase gAlI nikale, aura gAlI nikala gyii| maiM pachatA letA huuN| gAlI kA jo kSobha thA vaha bidA ho jAtA hai| maiM apanI jagaha vApasa lauTa AtA hUM jahAM maiM gAlI ke pahale thaa| 249
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 pazcAttApa vahIM lA detA hai vApasa jahAM maiM gAlI ke pahale thaa| lekina dhyAna rakheM, jahAM maiM gAlI ke pahale thA, usI meM se gAlI nikalI thii| maiM phira usI jagaha vApasa lauTa aayaa| usase phira gAlI niklegii| pI.DI. AspeMskI ne eka bahuta adabhuta kitAba likhI hai--di sTeMja lAipha Apha ivAna osokina, ivAna osokina kA vicitra jiivn| ivAna osokina eka jAdUgara phakIra ke pAsa gayA aura ivAna osokina ne kahA ki maiM AdamI to acchA huuN| maiMne apane bhItara Aja taka eka bhI burAI na paayii| lekina phira bhI mujhase kucha bhUleM ho gayI haiN| ve bhUleM ajJAnavaza huiiN| nahIM jAnatA thA koI cIja, aura bhUla ho gyii| rAste para jA rahA hUM, gaDDhe meM gira par3A kyoMki rAstA aparicita thaa| maiM giranevAlA vyakti nahIM huuN| ajJAna kI bhUla kA matalaba yaha hotA hai, paristhiti ajJAta thii| koI ghaTanA ghaTa gayI, vaha maiM ghaTAnA nahIM cAhatA thaa| kauna gaDDhe meM giranA cAhatA hai? maiM giranevAlA AdamI nahIM hai| gar3A thA, aMdherA thA, rAstA aparicita thA, yA kisI ne dhakkA de diyA, maiM gira gyaa| agara mujhe dubArA usI rAste para calane kA maukA mile to maiM tumheM batA sakatA hUM ki maiM usa rAste para calUMgA aura gaDDhe meM nahIM giruuNgaa| usa phakIra ne kahA ki eka maukA do maiM tumhArI bAraha varSa umra kama kie detA huuN| aba tuma bAraha varSa bAda aanaa| aura usane osokina kI umra bAraha varSa kama kara dii| vaha eka jAdUgara hai, usane usakI umra bAraha varSa kama kara dii| osokina usase vAyadA karake gayA hai ki tuma dekhoge ki bAraha varSa bAda maiM dUsarA hI AdamI huuN| yahI maiM cAhatA thA ki mujhe eka avasara aura mila jAe, isalie tAki jo bhUleM mujhase ajJAna meM ho gayI haiM, ve dubArA na hoN|| bAda osokina rotA haA usa phakIra ke pAsa AyA aura usane kahA-kSamA krnaa| vaha galatI rAste kI nahIM thI, merI hI thI kyoMki maiMne phira vahI bhUleM doharAI haiM, maiMne phira vahI kiyA hai jo maiMne pahale kiyA thaa| Azcarya ! maiM phira vahI jiyA hUM jo pahale jiyA thaa| usa phakIra ne kahA-maiM jAnatA thA, yahI hogaa| kyoMki bhUleM karma meM nahIM hotIM--prANoM kI gaharAI meM, astitva meM hotI haiN| umra badala do to karma phira se tuma kara loge, lekina tuma hI karoge na! yU vila DU iTa agena eMDa yU bIiMga da sem| tuma vahI hooge, tumhIM vahI karoge phira se; phira vahI ho jAegA, jo pahale huA thaa| IvAna osokina kI jiMdagI hI vicitra nahIM hai, isa artha meM hama sabakI jiMdagI vicitra hai| hAlAMki koI jAdUgara hamArI umra kama nahIM karatA, lekina jiMdagI hara bAra hameM na mAlUma kitanI bAra maukA detI hai| aisA nahIM hai ki krodha kA maukA Apako eka hI bAra AtA hai aura paristhiti eka hI bAra AtI hai| nahIM, isI jiMdagI meM hajAra bAra AtI hai, vahI hotI hai aura phira Apa vahI karate haiN| isase bacane ke lie Apa apane ko dhokhA dete haiM ki paristhiti hara bAra bhinna hai| kyoMki eka bAta to pakkI hai, Apa vahI haiN| agara paristhiti bhinna nahIM hai to doSa svayaM para A jaaegaa| isalie Apa hara bAra kahate haiM--paristhiti bhinna hai, isalie phira karanA pdd'aa| lekina jo jAnate haiM, ve kahate haiM ki paristhiti kA savAla nahIM hai, savAla Apa hI haiM-yU Ara da praablm| aura eka jiMdagI nahIM aneka jiMdagI milatI haiM, aura hama phira vahI doharAte haiM, phira vahI doharAte haiM, phira vahI doharAte haiN| mahAvIra ke pAsa koI sAdhaka AtA thA to ve use pichale janma ke smaraNa meM le jAte the, sirpha isIlie tAki vaha dekha le ki vaha kitanI bAra yahI saba doharA cukA hai aura yaha kahanA baMda kara de ki mere karma kI bhUla hai aura yaha jAna le ki bhUla merI hai| pazcAttApa, karma galata huA, isase saMbaMdhita hai| prAyazcita, maiM galata hUM, isa bodha se saMbaMdhita hai| aura ye donoM bAteM bahuta bhinna haiM, isameM jamIna AsamAna kA pharka hai| pazcAttApa karanevAlA vahI kA vahI banA rahatA hai aura prAyazcita karanevAle ko apanI jIvana cetanA rUpAMtarita kara denI hotI hai| savAla yaha nahIM hai ki maiMne krodha kiyA to maiM pachatA luuN| savAla yaha hai ki mujhase krodha ho sakA to maiM dUsarA AdamI 250
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa ho jAUM, aisA AdamI jisase krodha na ho sake-prAyazcita kA yaha artha hai| TrAMsapharmezana Apha da levala Apha da biiiNg| yaha savAla nahIM hai ki maiMne kala krodha kiyA thA, Aja maiM nahIM kruuNgaa| savAla yaha hai--kala mujhase krodha huA thA, maiM kala ke hI jIvana tala para Aja bhI haiN| vahI cetanA merI Aja bhI hai| pazcAttApa karanevAlA kala ke lie kSamA mAMga legaa| hara varSa hama mAMgate haiM micchAmi dukkar3ama, hara varSa hama mAMgate haiM, kSamA kara de / pichale varSa bhI mAMgA thA, usake pahale bhI kSamA mAMgI thii| kaba vaha dina AegA jaba ki kSamA mAMgane kA avasara na raha jaae| ki mAMgate hI rheNge| aura jAnate haiM bhalI-bhAMti ki jahAM se kSamA mAMgI jA rahI hai vahAM koI rUpAMtaraNa nahIM hai| vaha AdamI vahI hai jo pichale varSa thaa| ___ eka mitra pichale pUre varSa se mere saMbaMdha meM anUThI kahAniyAM pracArita karate haiN| aba yaha paryuSaNa pUre hue to unakA kala patra AyA ki mujhe kSamA kara deN| aisA nahIM ki maiMne jAne anajAne aparAdha kie hoM, unake lie kSamA kara deM-patra meM likhA hai, maiMne aparAdha kie haiM, unake lie kSamA kara deM, aura maiM hRdaya kI gaharAI se kSamA mAMgatA huuN| lekina maiM jAnatA hUM ki patra likhane ke bAda unhoMne vahI kAma punaH jArI kara diyA hogaa| kyoMki patra likhane se vaha rUpAMtaraNa nahIM ho jAnevAlA hai| kSamA mAMga lene se Apa nahIM badala jAeMge, Apa phira vahI hoNge| saca to yaha hai-jo kSamA mAMga lene se Apa nahIM badala jAeMge, Apa phira vahI hoNge| saca to yaha hai--jo kSamA mAMga rahA hai vahI AdamI hai jisane aparAdha kiyA hai| prAyazcita vAlA to ho sakatA hai kSamA na bhI mAMge, kyoMki vaha anubhava kare, aba maiM vaha AdamI hI nahIM hUM ki jisane aparAdha kiyA thA, aba maiM dUsarA AdamI huuN| vaha jAkara itanI khabara de de ki vaha AdamI jo tumheM gAlI de gayA thA, mara gayA hai| maiM dUsarA AdamI huuN| agara Apake mana ko acchA lage to maiM usakI tarapha se Apase kSamA mAMga lUM, kyoMki maiM usakI jagaha huuN| anyathA merA koI lenA denA nahIM hai, vaha AdamI mara cukA hai| prAyazcita kA artha hai-mRtyu usa AdamI kI jo bhUla kara rahA thA, usa cetanA kI jisase bhUla ho rahI thii| pazcAttApa kA artha hai-usa cetanA kA punarjIvana jisase bhala ho rahI hai| phira se rAstA sApha karanA, phira se panaH vahIM pahaMca jAnA jahAM hama khaDe the aura jahAM se bhUla hotI thI usI jagaha phira khar3e ho jaanaa| paira thor3e DagamagA jAte haiM aparAdha karake, bhUla krke| phira una pairoM ko majabUta karanA ho to kSamA sahayogI hotI hai| dhyAna rahe, loga isalie kSamA nahIM mAMgate ki ve samajha gae haiM ki unase aparAdha ho gayA, ve isalie kSamA mAMgate haiM ki yaha aparAdha kA bhAva unakI pratimA ko khaMDita karatA hai| ve isalie kSamA nahIM mAMgate haiM ki Apako coTa pahuMcI hai, kyoMki ve kala phira coTa pahuMcAnA jArI rakhate haiN| ve isalie kSamA mAMgate haiM ki aparAdha ke bhAva se unakI pratimA ko coTa pahuMcI hai| ve use sudhAra lete haiN| hama sabakA eka selpha imeja hai| saca nahIM hai vaha jarA bhI, lekina vahI hamArA asalI hai| ___ sunA hai maiMne ki mullA nasaruddIna apane beTe ko kaMdhe para lekara subaha ghUmane nikalA hai| suMdara hai usakA bettaa| jo bhI rAste para dekhatA hai vaha rukakara Thahara jAtA hai aura kahatA hai, suMdara hai| nasaruddIna kahatA hai--disa iz2a nthiNg| yU masTa sI hiz2a pikcr| yaha kucha nahIM hai, isakA citra dekho, taba tumheM patA clegaa| jo bhI nasaruddIna se kahatA hai-suMdara hai yaha tumhArA beTA; vaha kahatA hai-disa iz2a nthiNg| yU masTa sI hiz2a pikcr| yaha to kucha bhI nahIM hai| isakI pikcara dekho ghara Akara albama meM, taba tumako patA clegaa| __ vaha ThIka kaha rahA hai| hama saba bhI jAnate haiM ki hama to kucha bhI nahIM haiM, lekina hamArI tasvIra, vaha jo hamAre citta ke alabama meM hai, usako dekho| usako hI hama dikhAne kI koziza meM lage rahate haiN| usako hI hama dikhAne kI koziza meM lage rahate haiN| vaha tasvIra bar3I aura hai| vaha vahI nahIM hai jo hama haiN| isalie jaba usa tasvIra para koI dAga par3a jAtA hai aura hameM lagatA hai ki dAga par3a rahA hai to dAga ko hama poMcha lete haiN| pazcAttApa syAhI sokha kA kAma karatA hai| vaha prAyazcita nahIM hai, prAyazcita to tasvIra ko phAr3akara 251
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 pheMka degA aura kahegA--yaha maiM hUM hI nahIM, jisako maiM thopa rahA hUM nirNtr| pazcAttApa sirpha syAhI ke dhabbe ko alaga kara degaa| aura agara Apa kuzala hue to syAhI ke dhabbe ko isa DhaMga se banA deMge ki vaha tasvIra kA hissA aura zrRMgAra bana jaae| na kuzala hue to poMchane kI koziza kareMge, isameM thor3I-bahuta tasvIra kharAba bhI ho sakatI hai| agara Apane ravIMdranAtha kI kabhI hAtha se likhI, hastalikhita pratilipiyAM, unakI hastalikhita pAMDulipiyAM dekhI haiM to Apa bahuta cakita hoNge| ravIndranAtha se kahIM agara koI bhUla akSara meM ho jAe to ve usako aise nahIM kATate the, ve use kATakara vahAM eka citra banA dete aura kAgaja ko sajA dete| to unakI pAMDulipiyAM sajI par3I haiN| jahAM unhoMne kATA hai, vahAM sajA diyA hai| acchA hai, pAMDulipi meM karanA burA nahIM hai, AMkha ko sohatA hai| lekina AdamI jiMdagI meM bhI yahI karatA hai| vaha pazcAttApa dhabboM ko citra banAne kI koziza yA dhabboM ko poMcha DAlane kI koziza hai| pazcAttApa prAyazcita nahIM hai, lekina hama saba to pazcAttApa ko hI prAyazcita samajhate pazcAttApa bahuta sAdhAraNa-sI ghaTanA hai, jo mana kA niyama hai| mana ke niyama ko thor3A samajha leM ki pazcAttApa paidA sabako hotA hai| yaha mana kA sAmAnya niyama hai| prAyazcita sAdhanA hai| agara mahAvIra prAyazcita kA artha pazcAttApa karate hoM to yaha to koI bAta hI na huii| yaha to sabhI ko hotA hai| aisA AdamI khojanA kaThina hai jo pachatAtA na ho| agara Apa khojakara le AeM, to vaha AdamI aise hI ho sakatA hai jaisA mahAvIra ho| bAkI AdamI milanA muzkila hai jo pachatAtA na ho| pazcAttApa to jIvana kA sahaja krama hai| hara AdamI pazcAttApa karatA hai| to isako sAdhanA meM ginAne kI kyA jarUrata hai? pazcAttApa sAdhanA nahIM, mana kA niyama hai| mana kA yaha niyama hai ki mana eka ati se dUsarI ati para Dola jAtA hai| to mana ke isa niyama meM thor3e gahare praveza kara jAeM to pazcAttApa samajha meM A jaae| phira prAyazcita kI tarapha dhyAna uTha sakatA hai| ApakA kisI se prema hai to Apa usa AdamI meM cunAva karate haiM aura vahI-vahI dekhate haiM jo prema ko majabUta kare-silekTiva / koI AdamI kisI AdamI ko pUrA nahIM dekhtaa| dekha le to jiMdagI badala jAe, usakI khuda kI bhI badala jaae| hama saba cunAva jise maiM prema karatA haM usameM maiM ve ve hisse dekhatA hUM jo mere prema ko majabata karate haiM aura kahate haiM ki maiMne canAva ThIka kiyA hai| AdamI prema ke yogya hai| prema kiyA hI jAtA aise AdamI se, aisA AdamI hai| lekina yaha pUrA AdamI nahIM hai| yaha mana apane ko cunAva kara rahA hai| jaise maiM kisI kamare meM jAUM aura sapheda raMgoM ko cuna lUM aura kAle raMgoM ko chor3a duuN| Aja nahIM kala maiM sapheda raMgoM se Uba jAUMgA kyoMki mana jisa cIja se bhI paricita hotA jAtA hai, Uba jAtA hai| Aja nahIM kala maiM Uba jAUMgA isa sauMdarya kI silekTiva, eka cunAva kI gayI pratimA se| aura jaise maiM Ubane lagUMgA vaise hI vaha jo asuMdara maiMne chor3a diyA thA, dikhAI par3anA zurU ho jaaegaa| vaha tabhI taka nahIM dikhatA thA, vaha to hai hii| sundaratama vyakti meM bhI asuMdara hisse haiN| asuMdaratama vyakti meM bhI sauMdarya chipA hai| jIvana banatA hI hai virodha se. jIvana kI sArI vyavasthA hI virodha para khar3I hotI hai| kAle bAdaloM meM hI bijalI nahIM chipI hotI, hara bijalI kI camaka ke pIche kAlA bAdala bhI hotA hai| aura hara aMdherI rAta ke bAda hI subaha paidA nahIM hotI, hara subaha ke bAda kAlI rAta A jAtI hai| hara dukha meM khuzI hI nahIM chipI hai, hara khuzI ke bhItara se dukha kA aMkura bhI niklegaa| jIvana aise hI bahatA hai jaise nadI do kinAroM ke bIca bahatI hai| aura eka kinAre ke sAtha nahIM baha sktii| bhalA dusarA kinArA Apako na dikhAI paDatA ho. yA Apa na dekhanA cAhate hoM, lekina jaba isa kinAre se Uba jAeMge to dUsarA kinArA hI ApakA DerA bnegaa| 252
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa to jaba Apa eka vyakti meM sauMdarya dekhanA zurU karate haiM to Apa cunAva kara lete haiM eka kinAre kaa| bhUla jAte haiM--nadI do kinAroM meM bahatI hai| dUsarA kinArA bhI hai| usa dUsare ke kinAre ke binA na to nadI ho sakatI hai, na yaha kinArA ho sakatA hai| akelA kinArA kahIM hotA hai? kinAre kA matalaba yaha hotA hai ki vaha dUsare kA jor3a hai| para Apa cunAva kara lete haiN| phira Aja nahIM kala sauMdarya se thaka jaaeNge| saba cIjeM thakA detI haiM, saba cIjeM ubA detI haiN| mana cAhatA hai--roja nayA, roja nyaa| phira purAnA ubAne lagatA hai| phira jaba purAnA ubA detA hai to jo hisse Apane chor3a die the pahale cunAva meM ve pragaTa hone lagate haiN| dUsarA kinArA dikhAI par3atA hai aura jisake prati Apa prema se bhare the, usI ke prati ghRNA se bhara jAte haiN| jisake prati Apa zraddhA se bhare the, usIke prati azraddhA se bhara jAte haiN| jisako Apa bhagavAna kahane gae the usI ko Apa zaitAna kahane jA sakate haiN| isameM koI ar3acana nahIM hai| jisase Apane kahA thA-tere binA jI na sakeMge; usase hI Apa kaha sakate haiMaba tere sAtha na jI skeNge| ___ mana dvaMdva meM calatA hai, kyoMki cunAva karatA hai| isalie jise dvaMdva ke bAhara honA hai use cunAva rahita honA par3e, cvAisalaisa honA pdd'e| cunatA hI nahIM hai-kAlA hai to use bhI dekhatA hai, sapheda hai to use bhI dekhatA hai aura mAna letA hai ki kAlA ho nahIM sakatA sapheda ke binA, sapheda ho nahIM sakatA kAle ke binA-phira usa AdamI kI daSTi meM kabhI parivartana nahIM hotaa| maiM cakita hotA hN| saba saMbaMdha paravirtita hote haiN| eka AdamI mere pAsa AtA hai, itanI zraddhA aura itanI bhakti se bharakara AtA hai ki kabhI socA bhI nahIM jA sakatA ki yaha AdamI kabhI viparIta calA jaaegaa| lekina maiM jAnatA hUM ki isakI zraddhA aura bhakti cunAva hai| yaha viparIta jA sakatA hai| jaba yaha viparIta jAne lagatA hai to dUsare loga mere pAsa Akara kahate haiM ki yaha kaise saMbhava hai| Apake jo itanA nikaTa hai, Apako jo itanI bhakti detA hai vaha Apake viparIta jA rahA hai| unako patA nahIM ki yaha bilakula niyamAnusAra ho rahA hai| yaha bilakula niyamAnusAra ho rahA hai| eka kinArA usane cunA thA, aba vaha usa kinAre ko chor3akara dUsarA cunegaa| aura pahale kinAre ko jaba cunA thA taba bhI Apane apane ko tarka de lie the ki maiM sahI hUM aura dUsare kinAre ko cunate vakta bhI Apa apane ko tarka de leMge ki Apa sahI haiN| aura maiM Apase kahatA hUM ki eka kinAre ko cunanA galata hai| vaha kinArA kauna-sA hai, yaha savAla nahIM hai| vaha tarka kyA hai, yaha savAla nahIM hai| jaba koI Akara mujhe bhagavAna mAnane lagatA hai taba bhI maiM jAnatA hUM, vaha eka kinAre ko cuna rahA hai| vaha cunAva galata hai| eka kinAre ko cuna lenA galata hai| yaha savAla nahIM hai ki vaha kyA tarka apane ko de rahA hai| vahI AdamI kala mujhe zaitAna mAna legA aura taba bhI tarka khoja legA! maiM nahIM kahatA ki usakA zaitAna hI mAna lenA galata hai| maiM kahatA hUM usakA cunAva galata hai| vaha pUre ko nahIM dekha rhaa| cunegA to bdlegaa| jahAM taka cunAva hai vahAM taka parivartana hogaa| jaba Apa krodha meM hote haiM taba Apa eka hissA cuna lete haiM apane vyaktitva kA vaha jo krodha karanevAlA hai| jaba krodha nikala jAtA hai, bidA ho jAtA hai taba Apa apane vyaktitva kA dUsarA hissA cunate haiM jo pazcAttApa karanevAlA hai| krodha kara lete haiM eka hisse se, vaha eka cunAva thA, ApakI pratimA kA eka rUpa thaa| phira pazcAttApa kara lete haiM, vaha ApakI pratimA kA dUsarA cunAva hai| kinAroM ke bIca nAva bahatI rahatI hai| ApakI nadI bahatI rahatI hai| Apa yAtrA karate rahate haiN| kabhI isa kinAre lagA dete haiM nAva ko, kabhI usa kinAre lagA dete haiN| / prAyazcita do kinAroM ke bIca cunAva nahIM hai| prAyazcita bahuta adabhuta ghaTanA hai| pazcAttApa dekha letA hai, karma kI koI bhUla hai| prAyazcita dekhatA hai, maiM galata huuN| karma nahIM, kyoMki karma kyA galata hogA! galata AdamI se galata karma nikalate haiM, karma kabhI galata nahIM hote| galata AdamI se galata karma nikalate haiN| babUla ke kAMTe galata nahIM hote, ve babUla kI AtmA se nikalate haiN| kAMTe kyA 253
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 galata hoMge! ve babUla kI AtmA se nikalate haiN| lekina babUla jaba apane kAMToM ko dekhatA hai to kahatA hai ki dukhI huuN| vRkSa to maiM aisA nahIM hUM ki mujhase kAMTe nikleN| paristhiti ne nikAla die hoNge| yA apane ko samajhAe ki ho sakatA hai ki kucha logoM ke bhojana ke lie maiMne ye kAMTe nikAle hoM-ki UMTa haiM, bakariyAM haiM, ve bhojana kara sakeM, nahIM to bhUkhe mara jaaeNge| aise mujhameM kAMTe kA kyA savAla hai! kAMTe bhI nikalate haiM to kisI kI karuNA se nikalate haiN| krodha bhI AtA hai Apako to kisI ko badalane ke lie AtA hai| ki usa AdamI ko badalanA par3egA na! dayA ke kAraNa Apa krodha karate haiN| bApa kara rahA hai beTe para, mAM kara rahI beTI para-dayA ke kAraNa, karuNA ke kAraNa ki isako badalanA hai, nahIM to bigar3a jaaegaa| aura majA yaha hai ki saba krodha ke bAda kahIM koI sudhAra dikhAI nahIM pdd'taa| sArI duniyA krodha karatI A rahI hai| saba yAla meM krodha kara rahe haiM ki nahIM to loga bigaDa jAeMge, aura loga haiM ki bigaDate hI cale jA rahe haiN| koI kisI meM aMtara nahIM dikhAI par3atA hai| nahIM, mAlUma aisA hotA hai ki krodha kA saMbaMdha dUsare ko sudhAranA kama, yaha dUsare ko sudhAranA apane krodha ke lie tarka khojanA jyAdA hai| yaha dUsarA bhI kala bar3e hokara yahI tarka khojegA aura rezanalAija kregaa| yaha bhI apane baccoM ko aise hI sudhaaregaa| ye jo karma haiM, ina para jinakA dhyAna hai ve pazcAttApa se Age nahIM bar3heMge aura pazcAttApa Age bar3hanA hI nahIM hai-pIche lauTanA hai eka kadama, phira eka kadama vApisa; phira eka kadama Age, phira eka kadama piiche| phira krodha kiyA, phira paira uThAkara pIche rakha liyA; phira krodha kiyA, phira paira uThAkara pIche rakha liyaa| yaha eka hI jagaha para daur3ane jaisI kriyA hai, kahIM jAtI nhiiN| pazcAttApa se sajaga hoM, pazcAttApa Apako badalegA nahIM; badalane kA dhokhA detA hai| kyoMki jaba pazcAttApa ke kSaNa meM Apa hote haiM to Apa apane sAre acche guNa cuna lete haiN| jaba Apa kahate haiM-micchAmi dukkar3ama, taba Apa eka pratimA hote haiM sAkSAta kSamA kii| magara Apa bAiliMgvala haiM, dvibhASI haiN| vaha dUsarI bhASA bhItara chipI baiThI hai| vaha agara dUsarA AdamI kaha degA ki acchA Apa to mAnate ho lekina maiM nahIM mAnatA kyoMki maiMne koI aparAdha ApakI tarapha kiyA nahIM; to usI vakta dUsarI bhASA Apake bhItara sakriya ho jAe ki yaha AdamI duSTa hai| maiMne kSamA mAMgI aura isane kSamA bhI nahIM maaNgii| yA Apa kisI se kaheM ki maiM kSamA mAMgatA hUM aura vaha kaha de ki kiyA kssmaa| to pIr3A zurU ho jAegI ttkaal| dUsarI bhASA A jaaegii| sunA hai maiMne ki eka cUhA apane bila ke bAhara ghUma rahA thaa| acAnaka pairoM kI AvAja sunI-paricita thI, billI kI mAlUma par3atI thI-ghabarAkara apane bila ke bhItara calA gyaa| lekina jaise hI bhItara gayA, cakita huaa| bAhara to kuttA bhoMka rahA thA - bhoN-bhoN| cUhA bAhara aayaa| tatkAla billI ke muMha meM calA gyaa| cAroM tarapha dekhA, kuttA kahIM bhI nahIM thaa| cUhe ne pUchA ki tU mujhe mAra DAla, usameM koI harjA nahIM, lekina eka bAta... aura marate hue prANI kI eka jijJAsA ko pUrA kara de| vaha kuttA kahAM gayA? billI ne kahA-yahAM koI kuttA nahIM hai| yU no, iTa peiz2a Tu bI baailiNgvl| maiM kutte kI AvAja karatI hUM, hUM billI eNDa iTa peiz2a / tuma phaMsa gae mere cakkara meM, nahIM to tuma phaMsate nhiiN| dvibhASI hUM, kutte kI bhASA bolatI hUM, hUM billii| isase cUhe bar3I AsAnI se phaMsate haiN| * hama saba bAiliMgvala haiM, dvibhASI haiM, do-do bhASA jAnate haiN| bolane kI bhASA aura hai, hone kI bhASA aura hai| pUre vakta do kinAroM ke bIca calatA rahatA hai| pazcAttApa karake Apa bar3e prasanna hote haiM, jaisA krodha karake bahuta dukhI aura viSAda ko upalabdha hote haiN| krodha karake viSAda AtA hai ki aisA burA AdamI maiM nahIM thaa| pazcAttApa karake citta praphullita hotA hai, dekho kitanA acchA AdamI huuN| ahaMkAra punarpratiSThita huaa| nahIM, prAyazcita kA artha-bhUla karma meM nahIM hai, bhUla mujhameM hai, galata maiM huuN| 254
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa mullA nasaruddIna apane klaba ke bAhara nikala rahA hai| eka AdamI eka koTa ko pahanane kI koziza kara rahA hai klAka rUma se| mullA usase kahatA hai ki Apa bar3e galata AdamI haiN| mullA se usane kahA--maiMne to kucha kiyA hI nahIM! maiM apanA koTa pahana rahA huuN| mullA ne kahA-isIlie to maiM kahatA hUM ki Apa galata AdamI haiN| yaha koTa mullA nasaruddIna kA hai kahA-yaha mullA nasaruddIna kauna hai? mullA ne kahA-yaha mullA nasaruddIna maiM hUM, Apa merA koTa pahana rahe haiN| to usa AdamI ne kahA ki nAsamajha! aisA kyoM nahIM kahatA ki maiM galata koTa pahana rahA hUM, aisA kyoM kahatA hai ki maiM galata AdamI huuN| mullA ne kahA, galata AdamI hI galata koTa pahanate haiN| ___ jaba Apa koI galata kAma karate haiM to Apa cAhate haiM koI jyAdA se jyAdA itanA kahe ki Apase galata kAma ho gyaa| vaha yaha na kahe ki Apa galata AdamI haiM, kyoMki kAma kI to bar3I choTI sImA hai, eka kSaNa meM nipaTa jaaegaa| Apa! Apa to pUre jIvana para Aropita haiN| agara koI kahe-Apa galata haiM, to yaha jIvanabhara ke lie nindA ho gyii| agara karma galata hai, eka kSaNa kI bAta hai, isase viparIta karma kiyA jA sakatA hai| kie ko anakiyA kiyA jA sakatA hai, Dana ko anaDana kiyA jA sakatA hai| kie ke lie mAphI mAMgI jA sakatI hai| kie ke viparIta kiyA jA sakatA hai| karma ke Upara doSa dene meM koI kaThinAI nahIM hai| lekina vahI AdamI prAyazcita ko upalabdha hotA hai| jo kahatA-galata koTa maiM nahIM pahana rahA, maiM galata AdamI huuN| lekina taba prANoM meM bar3A maMthana hotA hai| ___taba savAla yaha nahIM hai ki maiMne kauna-kauna-se kAma galata kie; taba savAla yaha hai ki cUMki maiM galata hUM isalie maiMne jo bhI kiyA hogA, vaha galata hogaa| taba cunAva bhI nahIM hai ki kauna-sA galata kiyA aura maiMne kauna-sA ThIka kiyaa| jaba maiM galata hUM to maiMne jo bhI kiyA hogA vaha galata kiyA hogaa| behoza AdamI zarAba pie hue rAste para lar3akhar3AtA hai| vaha yaha nahIM kahatA ki mere kauna-kauna-se paira lar3akhar3Ae, yA kahegA? aura kauna-se paira mere ThIka par3e aura kauna-se paira mere lar3akhar3Ae? jaba vaha hoza meM AegA taba vaha kahegA ki maiM behoza thA, mere sabhI paira ldd'khdd'aae| ve jo ThIka par3ate mAlUma par3ate the ve bhI galatI se hI ThIka par3e hoMge kyoMki ThIka par3ane kA to koI upAya nahIM, kyoMki maiM zarAba pie thaa| hama bhItara eka gahare naze meM hote haiM, aura vaha gaharA nazA yaha hai ki hama, eka artha meM hama haiM hI nahIM. bilakala soe hae haiN| prAyazcita ko mahAvIra ne kyoM aMtara-tapa kA pahalA hissA banAyA? kyoMki vahI vyakti aMtaryAtrA para nikala sakegA jo karma kI galatI ko chor3akara svayaM kI galatI dekhanA zurU kregaa| dekhie, tIna taraha ke loga haiM-eka ve loga haiM jo dUsare kI galatI dekhate haiM; eka ve loga haiM jo karma kI galatI dekhate haiM; eka ve loga haiM jo svayaM kI galatI dekhate haiN| jo dUsare kI galatI dekhate haiM ve to pazcAttApa bhI nahIM krte| jo karma kI galatI dekhate haiM ve pazcAttApa karate haiN| jo svayaM kI galatI dekhate haiM, ve prAyazcita meM utarate haiN| jaba dUsarA hI galata hai taba to pazcAttApa kA koI savAla hI nahIM hai| lekina dhyAna rahe, dUsarA kabhI bhI galata nahIM hotaa| isa artha meM kabhI galata nahIM hotaa| ise bar3A kaThina hogA samajhanA ki dUsarA kabhI bhI galata nahIM hotaa| aMtaryAtrA ke pathika ko yaha samajha lenA hogA ki dUsarA kabhI bhI galata nahIM hotA hai| Apa kaheMge-Apa kaisI bAta kara rahe haiM kyoMki maiM galata hotA hUM to maiM dUsare ke lie to dUsarA hUM hI! aura agara dUsarA galata nahIM hotA to phira to maiM kaise galata hoUMgA? jaba maiM kaha rahA hUM-dUsarA kabhI galata nahIM hotA to isalie kaha rahA hUM...isalie nahIM ki dUsarA galata nahIM hotA, dUsarA galata hotA hai, lekina svayaM ke lie, Apa galata hote haiM svayaM ke lie... dUsare ke lie Apa galata nahIM ho sakate / Apa mahAvIra ke pAsa jAeM taba Apako tatkAla patA cala jaaegaa| Apa gAlI deM, mahAvIra meM gAlI aise gUMjegI jaise kisI ghATI meM 255
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 gUMje aura vilIna ho jaae| Apa mahAvIra ko krodhita na karavA paaeNge| aura taba bar3e hairAnI kI bAta hai ki agara Apa krodhI AdamI haiM to Apako aura jyAdA krodha AegA ki dUsarA AdamI krodhita taka nahIM huaa| to aura krodha aaegaa| jIsasa ko sUlI para laTakAnA par3A kyoMki yaha AdamI una logoM ke sAmane apanA dUsarA gAla karatA rahA, jo cAMTA mArane Ae the| unakA krodha bhayaMkara hotA calA gyaa| agara yaha bhI unako eka cAMTA mAra detA to jIsasa ko sUlI para laTakAne kI koI jarUrata na pdd'tii| bAta nipaTa gayI hotii| samAna tala para A gae hote| phira to koI kaThinAI na thii| __ enI bIseMTa je.kRSNamUrti ko kaimbrija aura AksaphorDa yUnivarsiTI ke alaga-alaga kAlejoM meM bhartI karAne ke lie ghUma rahI thI, par3hane ke lie| lekina koI kAleja kA priMsipala kRSNamUrti ko lene ko rAjI nahIM huaa| jisa kAleja meM bhI enI bIseMTa gayI, enI bIseMTa ne kahA ki yaha sAkSAta bhagavAna kA avatAra hai, yaha divya puruSa hai| inameM varlDa TIcara, jagata-guru kA janma hone ko hai| ___ una priMsipalsa ne kahA ki kSamA kareM, itanI viziSTatA Apa unheM de rahI haiM ki hama kAleja meM bhartI nahIM kara skeNge| enI bIseMTa ne kahA-kyoM? to unhoMne kahA-isalie bhartI na kara sakeMge ki eka to isa bacce ko parezAnI hogI itanI mahattA kA bojha lekara calane meM, aura dUsare lar3ake bhI isako parezAna kreNge| isako kaThinAI par3egI itanI garimA lekara calane meM, aura dUsare lar3ake isako parezAna kreNge| yaha zAMti se na par3ha pAegA, zAMti se na jI paaegaa| isalie hama ise na leNge| lekina sabhI priMsipaloM ne eka khAsa kAleja kA nAma batAyA ki Apa vahAM calI jAo, vaha kAleja bhartI kara legaa| enI bIseMTa bahuta hairAna thI, phira Akhira jaba koI kAleja meM jagaha nahIM milI... kyoMki vaha kAleja acchA kAleja nahIM thA, jisakA loga nAma lete the, usakI pratiSThA nahIM thii| enI bIseMTa ko jaba koI upAya na rahA to vaha kRSNamUrti ko lekara usa kAleja meM gyii| usa kAleja ke priMsipala ne kahA-khuzI se bhartI ho jAo, maje se bhartI ho jAo; bikAz2a ina avara kAleja evarIvana ija e gaadd| evarIvana vila TrITa yU ikklii| koI dikkata na aaegii| idhara sabhI lar3ake bhagavAna haiM hamAre kAleja meN| koI kaThinAI na AegI balki tumako dikkata yahI ho sakatI hai ki kaI isameM bigara gADsa haiM, ve tumako dabAeMge, tumako choTA gADa siddha kreNge| tuma jarA isake lie sAvadhAna rhnaa| bAkI aura koI ar3acana nahIM hai| de vila TrITa yU ikklii| samAna vyavahAra kreNge| yaha jo, hama jo vyavahAra kara rahe haiM dUsare se, vaha dUsare para kama nirbhara hai, hama para jyAdA nirbhara hai| hameM lagatA aisA hI hai ki dUsare para nirbhara hai, vahI hamArI bhrAMti hai, vaha hama para hI nirbhara hai| hama hI use ukasAte haiM jAne anjaane| aura jaba dUsarA use karane lagatA hai to lagatA hai vaha dUsare se A rahA hai| aba jisa kAleja meM hareka lar3akA apane ko bhagavAna samajhatA hai, usa kAleja meM koI dikkata nahIM hai priMsipala ko| vaha kahatA hai-koI aDacana na aaegii| lekina jisa kAleja meM aisA nahIM hai. usa rahA hai ki isase ar3acana khar3I hogii| AsAna nahIM hogA yaha, kRSNamUrti kA yahAM rhnaa| yaha ar3acana bnegii| mahAvIra ke pAsa Apa jAeMge to Apako kaThinAI AegI, agara mahAvIra Apake sAtha samAnatA kA vyavahAra kareMge to kaThinAI na aaegii| Apa gAlI deM mahAvIra ko aura mahAvIra bhI Apako gAlI de deM to Apa jyAdA prasanna ghara lauTeMge kyoMki barAbara siddha hue| agara mahAvIra gAlI na deM aura muskurA deM to Apa rAtabhara becaina raheMge ghara ki yaha AdamI kucha Upara mAlUma par3atA hai, isako nIce lAnA pdd'egaa| to isalie kaI bAra to aisA haA hai ki bahata sAdhuoM ne sirpha isalie gAlI dI ki Apako unako nIce lAne kI vyartha koziza na karanI pdd'e| Apa hairAna hoMge, yaha jagata bahuta ajIba hai| kaI sAdhuoM ko isalie Apake sAtha durvyavahAra karanA par3A tAki Apako unake sAtha durvyavahAra na karanA pdd'e| rAmakRSNa gAlI dete the, ThIka mAM-bahana kI gAlI dete the| aura Dhera phakkar3a sAdhu gAliyAM dete rahe, patthara mArate rahe, aura sirpha isalie ki Apako kaSTa na uThAnA par3e unako phAMsI vagairaha dene kA Apa para 256
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa dayA karake, yahI smjhkr| ___ aura yaha bar3e maje kI bAta hai, aba taka aise kisI sAdhu ko phAMsI nahIM dI gayI, jisane gAlI dI ho aura patthara pheMke hoN| yaha Apako patA hai? pUre itihAsa meM manuSya jAti ke! sukarAta ko jahara pilA dete haiM, mahAvIra ko patthara mArate haiM, buddha ko parezAna karate haiN| hatyA kI aneka kozizeM kI jAtI haiM buddha kI-caTTAna sarakA dI jAtI hai, pAgala hAthI chor3a diyA jAtA hai| jIsasa ko sUlI para laTakAte haiM, maMsUra ko kATa DAlate haiN| lekina aisA eka bhI ullekha nahIM hai ki Apane usa sAdhu ke sAtha durvyavahAra kiyA ho jisane Apake sAtha durvyavahAra kiyA ho| yaha bar3e maje kI bAta hai| yaha bar3A aitihAsika tathya hai| bAta kyA hai? asala meM jo Apako gAlI detA hai, yU TrITa hima ikvlii| bAta khatma ho gyii| vaha AdamI itanA Upara nahIM, jisako phAMsI-vAMsI lagAnI par3e, nIce lAnA pdd'e| apane hI jaisA hai, clegaa| to kaI kuzala sAdhu sirpha isalie gAlI dene ko majabUra hue ki Apako nAhaka parezAnI meM na par3anA par3e, kyoMki phAMsI lagAne meM parezAnI sAdhu ko kama hotI hai, Apako jyAdA hotI hai| bar3A iMtajAma karanA par3atA hai| nata nahIM hai isa smaraNa se hI aMtaryAtrA zurU hotI hai| agara dasarA galata hai, taba to aMtaryAtrA zurU hI nahIM hogii| dasarA galata hai yA nahIM, yaha savAla nahIM hai; dUsarA galata hai, yaha dRSTi galata hai| dUsarA galata hai yA nahIM, isa tarka meM Apa par3eMge to kabhI dUsarA sahI mAlUma par3egA, kabhI galata mAlUma pdd'egaa| cunAva zurU ho jaaegaa| dUsarA sahI hai yA galata hai, yaha sAdhaka kI dRSTi nahIM hai| maiM galata hUM yA nahIM, yaha ThaharAnA sAdhaka kI dRSTi nahIM hai| maiM galata hUM, yaha sunizcita mAnakara cala par3anA sAdhaka kI dRSTi hai| prAyazcita taba zurU hotA hai jaba maiM mAnatA hUM, maiM galata huuN| saca to yaha hai ki jaba taka maiM hUM taba taka maiM galata hoUMgA hii| honA hI galata hai, vaha jo asmitA hai, vaha jo igo-'maiM hUM'-vahI merI galatI hai| merA honA hI merI galatI hai| jaba taka 'maiM nahIM na ho jAUM taba taka prAyazcita phalita nahIM hogaa| aura jisa dina maiM nahIM ho jAtA hUM, zUnyavata ho jAtA hUM usI dina merI cetanA rUpAMtarita hotI hai aura nae loka meM praveza karatI hai| phira bhI aisA nahIM hai ki aisI rUpAMtarita cetanA meM Apako galatiyAM na mila jaaeN| kyoMki galatiyAM Apa apane kAraNa khojate haiN| eka bAta pakkI hai ki aisI cetanA ko Apa meM galatiyAM milanI baMda ho jaaeNgii| isalie to aisI cetanAeM Apase kaha sakIM ki Apa paramAtmA haiM, Apa zuddha AtmA haiM, Apake bhItara mokSa chipA hai| da kiMgaDama Apha gADa ija vidina yuu| isalie jIsasa judAsa ke paira par3a ske| isase koI pharka nahIM par3atA ki judAsa ne tIsa rupaye meM jIsasa ko beca diyA hai sUlI para laTakAne ke lie, isase koI pharka nahIM pdd'taa| isase koI aMtara hI nahIM par3atA kyoMki jisa AdamI ne apane ko badalA huA pAyA, usako phira kisI meM kahIM koI galatI nahIM dikhAI pdd'tii| aura jyAdA se jyAdA agara use kucha dikhAI par3atA hai to itanA hI dikhAI par3atA hai ki Apa behoza ho, aura behoza AdamI ko kyA galata tthhraanaa| behoza AdamI jo bhI karatA hai, galata hotA hai, lekina hozavAlA AdamI behoza AdamI ko kyA galata tthhraae!| bahuta majedAra ghaTanAeM ghaTatI haiM, aura hozavAle AdamiyoM ne apane saMsmaraNa nahIM likhe, ve likheM to bar3e adabhuta hoNge| behoza AdamiyoM ke bIca jInA hozavAle AdamI ko itanA sTeMja mAmalA hai, itanA vicitra hai, lekina kisI ne apanA saMsmaraNa likhAyA nahIM kyoMki Apa usa para bharosA na kara sakeMge ki aisA ho sakatA hai| aise hI jaise Apako eka pAgalakhAne meM baMda kara diyA jAe aura Apa pAgala na hoM, taba jo jo ghaTanAeM Apake jIvana meM ghaTeMgI unase vicitra ghaTanAeM kahIM bhI nahIM ghaTa sktiiN| aura agara Apa bAhara Akara kaheMge to koI bharosA nahIM kara sakatA ki aisA ho sakatA hai| pAgala bharosA nahIM kareMge kyoMki ve pAgala haiN| gaira pAgala bharosA nahIM kareMge kyoMki unheM pAgaloM kA koI patA nhiiN| aura Apa donoM hAlata meM raha lie, Apa pAgala nahIM the aura pAgaloM ke bIca meM 257
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 rhe| ___eka vRddha sAdhaka-sarala, sIdhe AdamI haiN| koI soca bhI nahIM sakatA ki unameM kahIM koI parte dabI hoMgI. sabake bhItara parte dabI haiN| ve gahare dhyAna meM abhI Ajola Azrama meM the| eka dina dhyAna meM acchI gaharAI meM gae, aura gaharAI meM gae isIlie yaha ghaTanA ghaTI, nahIM to ghaTatI nahIM; anyathA sIdhA-sAdApana thaa| unhoMne AnaMda madhu ko bAhara nikalakara subaha kahA ki maiM isI vakta bambaI jA rahA huuN| mujhe rajanIza kI Aja hI hatyA kara denI hai| merA unase isa janma meM koI saMbaMdha nahIM, sivAya isake ki unhoMne mujhase saMnyAsa liyA hai| vaha bhI eka kSaNabhara kA milanA huA, isase jyAdA koI saMbaMdha nhiiN| pichale janmoM ko yAda karane kI maiMne bahuta koziza kI, koI yAda nahIM par3atA hai ki unase merA koI saMbaMdha rahA ho| zAMta, sIdhe AdamI haiN| samasta jIvana ko chor3akara sAdhanA kI dizA meM gae, aura gahare gae, isalie yaha ghaTanA ghttii| nahIM to Upara se to zAMta, sIdhe haiN| to kyA huA? madhu parezAna huii| ve ekadama taiyAra haiM, hatyA karane jAnA hai| sAmane hI merA citra rakhA thA, vaha citra usane sAmane rakha diyA aura kahA-pahale ise phAr3a DAleM, pahale isa citra kI hatyA kara deM phira Apa jaaeN| citta dUsare kinAre para tatkAla calA gayA, ve behoza hokara gira pdd'e| roe, pchtaae| kucha kiyA nahIM hai abhI, vaha citra bhI nahIM phaadd'aa| __ gahare tala para kahIM hiMsA kA koI AvaraNa sabake bhItara hai| to jitane gahare jAeMge, utanA hiMsA kA AvaraNa milegaa| aura hiMsA jaba zuddha pragaTa hotI hai to akAraNa pragaTa hotI hai| azuddha hiMsA hai jo kAraNa khojakara pragaTa hotI hai| akAraNa maiM kahatA hUM...jaba Apa kAraNa khojakara krodhita hote haiM, to usakA matalaba hai krodha abhI bahata gahare tala para nahIM hai aapke| jaba gahare tala para krodha hotA hai, taba Apa akAraNa krodhita hote haiN| abhI to kAraNa milatA hai taba krodhita hote haiM, taba Apa krodhita hote haiM isalie phaurana kAraNa khojate haiN| gaharI parte haiN| abhI eka yuvaka mere pAsa apanI hiMsA para prayoga kara rahA thaa| aba hara bhAva kI sAta parte hotI haiM manaSya ke bhItara sAta zarIroM kI parte hotI haiM-sevana bADIz2a kI, vaise hara bhAva kI sAta parte hotI haiN| Upara se gAlI de lete haiM, Upara se pazcAttApa kara lete haiM, isase kucha nahIM ho jAtA hai| bhItara kI parte vaisI kI vaisI banI rahatI haiN-surkssit| aura jitane gahare utarate haiM utane akAraNa bhAva pragaTa hone zurU hote haiN| jaba gaharI sAtavIM parta para pahuMcate haiM to koI kAraNa nahIM raha jaataa| __ usa yuvaka ko hiMsA hI takalIpha thii| apane pitA kI hatyA karane kA khayAla hai, apanI mAM kI hatyA karane kA khayAla hai| aba maiM jAnatA thA jo apanI mAM aura pitA kI hatyA karane ke khayAla se bharA hai, agara vaha merA ziSya banA to maiM phAdara imeja ho jaauuNgaa| Aja nahIM kala vaha merI hatyA karane ke khayAla se bhregaa| kyoMki guru ko bhaktoM ne jaba kahA hai ki guru pitA hai aura guru mAtA hai aura guru brahma hai, akAraNa nahIM kahA hai| phAdara imeja, guru jo hai| jaba eka vyakti kisI ke caraNoM meM sira rakhatA hai aura use guru hoNge| usakA, jinhoMne kahA hai-tuma pitA ho, tuma mAtA ho unheM kucha patA nhiiN| jaba eka AdamI mujhase Akara kahatA hai ki Apa hI mAtA, Apa hI pitA, Apa hI brahma, Apa hI saba kucha; taba maiM jAnatA hUM, aba maiM phNsaa| __ phaMsA isalie ki aba taka isakI jitanI bhI dhAraNAeM thIM, aba merI tarapha hoNgii| isako koI bhI patA nahIM hai| isalie maiM kahatA hUM-pAgalakhAne meM hone kA anubhava kaisA hotA hai, isako kucha bhI patA nhiiN| yaha to bahuta sadabhAva se kaha rahA hai, bahuta AnaMda Apa hI saba kucha haiN| lekina kala hI vaha mujhe saba batAkara ke gayA hai ki vaha pitA kI hatyA karanA cAhatA hai| maiM jAnatA hUM Aja 258 '
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa nahIM kl...| abhI kala mujhe eka mitra ne Akara khabara dI ki vaha kahatA hai ki merI hatyA kara degaa| to ve ghabarA gae--jinako khabara milI ve| unhoMne kahA ki yaha kyA mAmalA hai, pAgaloM ke bIca rahane kA? eka aura majedAra ghaTanA abhI ghaTa rahI hai, to Apako khN| eka yuvatI mere pAsa dhyAna kara rahI thI-aura yaha ghaTanA itanI mahilAoM ko ghaTI hai ki kaha denA acchA hogA kyoMki kahIM na kahIM isa saMbaMdha meM khabara phuNcegii| aura pAgala Apako koI khabara deM to Apa bhI utane hI pAgala hone se jaldI bharosA kara lete haiM, pakar3a lete haiN| aba eka mahilA dillI meM rahatI hai, vaha mujhe vahAM se likhatI hai ki rAta do baje, rAta Apa sazarIra mujhase saMbhoga karate haiM, dillI meM Akara, ThIka hai! dillI meM rahatI hai, isalie koI jhaMjhaTa nahIM hai, isalie koI ar3acana nahIM hai| eka mahilA ne mujhe Akara kahA ki mujhe pakkA smaraNa Ane lagA hai ki maiM pichale janma kI ApakI patnI huuN| maiMne kahA-hogA, aba isameM chipAne jaisI bAta nahIM hai, bar3e gaurava kI bAta hai| to jAkara usane aura ko batAyA, usane dUsarI mahilA ko btaayaa| yaha mahilA to grAmINa hai, jyAdA samajhadAra nahIM hai, bholI-bhAlI hai| jisako batAyA vaha to yUnivarsiTI kI grejyueTa hai, par3hI likhI mahilA hai, bar3e parivAra kI hai| vaha mahilA mere pAsa AyI aura usane kahA ki yaha kyA nAsamajhI kI bAta kara rahI hai, vaha aurt| yaha nahIM ho sakatA, yaha bilakula galata hai| to maiMne kahA ki tumane ThIka socA, use samajhA denaa| ___ usane kahA--maiMne use samajhAyA, lekina vaha mAnane ko rAjI nahIM hai| vaha kahatI hai mujhe pakkA bharosA hai, mujhe smaraNa hai| maiMne use bahuta samajhAyA, usa dUsarI strI ne mujhe kahA-lekina vaha mAnane ko rAjI nahIM hai| lekina yaha bAta galata hai, yaha pracalita nahIM honI caahie| bhUla se maiMne eka bAta pUcha lI usase, to bar3I muzkila ho gyii| bhUla se maiMne usa strI se pUchA ki mAna lo vaha mAnane ko rAjI nahIM hotI to terA kyA pakkA pramANa hai ki vaha galata kahatI hai| vaha bolI-isalie ki pichale janma meM to maiM ApakI aurata thii| isalie do do kaise ho sakatI haiN| aba kucha kahane kA mAmalA hI na rahA, aba bAta hI khatma ho gyii| aba isase bar3A pramANa ho bhI kyA sakatA hai? pAgaloM ke bIca bar3A muzkila hai, bar3A muzkila hai, atyaMta kaThina hai| to maiMne kahA-vaha strI to dillI meM hai. isalie koI dikkata nahIM hai| abhI eka amarIkana laDakI mere pAsa dhyAna kara rahI thI do mahIne se| usane mujhe cAra-chaha mahIne ke bAda kahA ki jaba Apake pAsa Akara baiThatI hUM, AMkheM baMda karatI hUM to mujhe aisA lagatA hai ki Apa mujhase saMbhoga kara rahe haiN| maiMne kahA-koI phikra na karo, saMbhoga kA jo bhAva Ae, usako bhI bhItara le jAne kI koziza kro| vaha jo UrjA uThe, usako bhI Upara kI yAtrA para le jaao| to usane mujhase kahA ki Apa mujhe hara do dina meM kama-se-kama dasa dasa minaTa pAsa baiThane kA maukA de deM, kyoMki yaha itanA rasapUrNa hai ki saMbhoga meM bhI mujhe rasa calA gyaa| ___ mere sAmane do hI vikalpa haiM, yA to maiM usako inakAra kara dUM, kyoMki yaha khatarA mola lenA hai| lekina yaha bhI maiM dekha rahA hUM ki usako inakAra karanA bhI galata hai kyoMki use saca meM hI parivartana ho rahA hai| aura agara saMbhoga aMtarmukhI ho jAe to bar3I krAMti ghaTita hotI hai| vaha do mahIne mere pAsa prayoga karatI thI, lekina maiMne usase kahA, dhyAna rakhanA, ina do mahIne meM bhUlakara bhI zArIrika saMbhoga mata krnaa| vaha apane pati ke sAtha hai| maiMne pUchA ki kitane saMbhoga karatI ho? usane kahA-saptAha meM kama-se-kama do tIna, isase kama meM to nahIM cala sktaa| vaha pati to mAnane ko rAjI nahIM hai| to maiMne kahA ki saMbhoga cala rahA hai, vahAM taka to ThIka hai, kala tU garbhavatI ho jAe to maiM jimmevAra na ho jAUM! yaha honevAlA hai| usane kahA- nahIM, yaha kaisI bAta? aura yahI huaa| abhI kala mujhe kisI ne Akara khabara dI ki usakA pati kahatA hai ki vaha mujhase garbhavatI ho gayI hai| ye bar3e 259
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 maje kI bAteM haiN| lekina pAgaloM ke bIca jInA bhI bar3A kaThina hai| unake bIca jInA ati kaThina hai| itanI bhIr3a hai unkii| para unako maiM galata nahIM khtaa| unako maiM galata nahIM khtaa| ___ galata ve nahIM haiM, sirpha behoza haiN| ve kyA kara rahe haiM, unheM patA nahIM hai, ve kyA kara rahe haiM, unheM patA nhiiN| kyA ho rahA hai, vaha unheM patA nhiiN| ve kyA projekTa kara rahe haiM, kyA soca rahe haiM, kyA mAna rahe haiM, isakA unheM koI patA nahIM hai| to ve bilakula behoza haiN| vaha yuvatI mere eka mitra ke ghara meM ThaharI to mujhe dUsare mitroM ne kahA ki nikalavAo vahAM se| maiMne kahA-yaha to savAla hI nahIM hai| abhI to vaha aura musIbata meM hai, use vahAM se nikalavAnA ThIka nahIM hai, use vahAM rahane do| takalIpha hogii| use vahAM rahane do| kisI ne kahA-pulisa ko de denA caahie| maiMne kahA-yaha bilakula pAgalapana kI bAta hai| pulisa kyA karegI? pulisa kA kyA lenA-denA hai usa bAta se? aba vaha jo yuvaka kahatA phiratA hai ki merI hatyA kara deM, agara vaha kala merI hatyA kara de to bhI galata nahIM hai| to bhI galata nahIM hai| sirpha behoza hai, soyA huA hai| aura vaha sone meM jo bhI kara sakatA thA, kara rahA hai| dhyAna rahe, hamAre citta kI do dazAeM haiM-eka soyI haI cetanA hai hamArI aura eka jAgrata cetanA hai| prAyazcita jAgrata cetanA kA lakSaNa hai, pazcAttApa soyI huI cetanA kA lakSaNa hai| yaha yuvaka kala Akara mujhase mAphI mAMga jAegA, isakA koI matalaba nahIM hai| Aja jo kaha rahA hai usakA bhI koI matalaba nahIM hai, kala yaha mAphI mAMga jAegA usakA bhI koI matalaba nahIM hai| isase koI saMbaMdha nahIM hai| yaha mAphI mAMganA bhI usI nIMda se A rahA hai, yaha krodha bhI usI nIMda se A rahA hai| yaha strI garbhavatI samajha rahI hai mere dvArA ho gyii| yaha jisa nIMda se A rahA hai, kala usI nIMda se kucha aura bhI A sakatA hai| usase koI pharka nahIM par3atA hai| galata, sahI isameM cunAva nahIM hai, ye sirpha soe hue loga haiN| aura soyA huA AdamI jo kara sakatA hai, vaha kara rahA hai| abhI soe hue AdamI ke prati pazcAttApa kI zikSA se kucha bhI na hogaa| ise smaraNa dilAnA jarUrI hai ki yaha savAla nahIM hai ki tuma kyA kara rahe ho, savAla yaha hai ki tuma kyA ho? tuma bhItara kyA ho, tuma usI ko bAhara phailAe cale jAte ho| aura vahI tuma dekhane lagate ho| aura jitanA koI gaharA utaregA utanI hI akAraNa bhAvanAeM prakSipta hotI haiM aura sajIva aura sAkAra mAlUma hone lagatI haiN| aura jaba vaha sAkAra mAlUma hone lagatI haiM to phira ThIka haiM, jo hama dekhanA cAhate haiM vaha hama dekha lete haiN| dhyAna rahe, hama vaha nahIM dekhate jo hai, hama vaha dekha lete haiM jo hama dekhanA cAhate haiM yA dekha sakate haiN| dhyAna rahe, hama vaha nahIM sunate jo kahA jAtA hai, hama vaha suna lete haiM jo hama sunanA cAhate haiM, yA hama suna sakate haiN| hama cunAva kara rahe haiM / jiMdagI anaMta hai, usameM se hama canAva kara rahe haiN| hama bhI anaMta haiM, usameM se bhI hama cunAva kara rahe haiN| kabhI hama cana lete haiM krodha karane kI vatti: kabhI cana lete haiM pazcAttApa kI vRtti, kabhI ghRNA kI, kabhI prema kI, aura hama donoM hAlata meM soe AdamI haiN| isase koI pharka nahIM par3atA hai| eka rAta jora se zarAbaghara ke mAlika kI TelIphona kI ghaMTI bajane lagI-do baje rAta, gusse meM parezAna, nIMda TUTa gyii| ghaMTI uThAyI, phona utthaayaa| pUchA, kauna hai? usane kahA, mullA nsruddiin| kyA cAhate ho do baje rAta? usane kahA, maiM yahI pUchanA cAhatA hUM ki zarAba ghara khulegA kaba? vhena DU yU opn| usane kahA, yaha bhI koI bAta hai, tU roja kA graahk| dasa baje subaha khulatA hai, yaha bhI do baje rAta phona karake pUchane kI koI jarurata hai? vaha gusse meM phona paTakakara phira so gyaa| cAra baje phira phona kI ghaMTI bjii| utthaayaa| kauna hai? usane kahA, mullA nsruddiin| kaba taka khologe daravAje? mAlika ne kahA, mAlUma hotA hai tU jyAdA pI gayA hai yA pAgala ho gayA hai| abhI cAra hI baje haiM, dasa baje khulanevAlA hai| agara tU dasa baje AyA bhI to tujhe ghusane nahIM duuNgaa| AI vila nATa alAu yU in| mullA ne kahA, hU vAMTsa Tu kama in| Ai vAMTa Tu go AuTa / maiM to bhItara baMda huuN| aura kholo jaldI, nahIM to maiM pItA calA jA rahA huuN| abhI to mujhe patA cala rahA hai ki bAhara bhItara meM pharka hai| 260
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa thor3I dera meM vaha bhI patA nahIM clegaa| abhI to mujhe phona naMbara yAda hai| thor3I dera meM vaha bhI nahIM rhegaa| abhI to maiM batA sakatA hU~, meM mullA nasaruddIna huuN| thor3I dera meM vaha bhI nahIM batA skuugaa| jaldI kholo| hama saba aisI taMdrA meM haiM, jahAM patA bhI nahIM calatA ki bAhara kyA hai, bhItara kyA hai| maiM kauna hUM, yaha bhI patA nahIM cltaa| kahAM jAnA cAha rahe haiM, yaha bhI patA nahIM cltaa| kahAM se A rahe haiM, yaha bhI patA nahIM cltaa| kyA prayojana hai, kisalie jI rahe haiM? kucha patA nahIM calatA hai| eka behozI hai--eka gaharI behoshii| usa behozI meM hAtha paira mAre cale jAte haiN| usa hAtha paira mArane ko hama karma kahate haiN| kabhI kisI ko galata laga jAtA hai to mAphI mAMga lete haiM; kabhI kisI ko lagane se koI prasanna ho jAtA hai to kahate haiM--prema kara rahe haiN| kabhI laga jAtA hai, coTa khA jAtA hai, vaha AdamI nArAja ho jAtA hai to kaha dete haiM-mApha karanA, galatI ho gyii| hAtha vahI hai, aMdhere meM mAre jA rahe haiN| kabhI ThIka, kabhI galata, aisA lagatA mAlUma par3atA hai, lekina hAtha behoza haiM, ve sadA hI galata haiN| prAyazcita meM utaranA ho to jAna lenA ki maiM galata hai; maiM soyA huA huuN| galata kA matalaba, soyA huA hUM, behoza huuN| mujhe kucha bhI patA nahIM hai ki mere paira kahAM par3a rahe haiM, kyoM par3a rahe haiN| Apako patA hai, Apa kyA kara rahe haiM? kabhI eka daphA jhakajhorakara apane ko khar3e hokara Apane socA hai do minaTa ki kyA kara rahe haiM isa jiMdagI meM Apa? yaha kyA ho rahA hai Apase? isIlie Ae haiM? yahI hai artha? agara jora se jhakajhorA to eka sekeMDa ke lie Apako lagegA ki sArI jiMdagI vyartha mAlUma par3atI hai| __ prAyazcita meM vahI utara sakatA hai jo apane ko jhakajhorakara pUcha sake ki kyA hai artha? isa jiMdagI kA matalaba kyA hai jo maiM jI se zAma taka kA cakkara; yaha krodha aura ghaNA kA cakkara; yaha prema aura ghaNA kA cakkara; yaha kSamA aura duzmanI kA cakkara yaha saba kyA hai? yaha dhana aura yaha yaza aura yaha ahaMkAra aura yaha pada aura maryAdA, yaha saba kyA hai? isameM koI artha hai? ki maiMne jo kucha bhI kiyA hai isameM maiM kisI tarapha bar3ha rahA hUM, kahIM pahuMca rahA hUM? koI yAtrA ho rahI hai? koI maMjila karIba AtI mAlUma par3a rahI hai? yA meM cakkara kI tarapha ghUma rahA hUM? ina chaha bAhya tapoM ke bAda yaha AsAna ho jaaegaa| saMlInatA ke bAda yaha AsAna ho jAtA hai ki jaba ApakI zakti Apake bhItara baiTha gayI hai, taba Apa jhakajhora sakate haiM aura pacha sakate haiM usako jagAkara ki yaha maiM kyA kara rahA hUM? yaha ThIka hai? yahI hai? yaha kara lene se maiM tRpta ho jAUMgA, saMtuSTa ho jAUMgA? Apa mara jAeMge, Apako lagatA hai jaba taka jIte haiM-bar3I jagaha khAlI ho jaaegii| kitane kAma baMda ho jAeMge! kitanA virATa cakkara Apa calA rahe the, lekina kabristAna bhare par3e hue haiM, aise logoM se jo socate the ki unake binA duniyA na clegii| duniyA hI na calegI, saba zAMta, cAMda sUraja saba ruka jaaeNge| ___ mullA nasaruddIna ko kisI ne pUchA hai ki agara duniyA miTa jAe to tumhArA kyA khayAla hai? to usane pUchA ki kauna-sI duniyA? do taraha se duniyA miTatI hai| usa AdamI ne kahA, hada ho gayI ! yaha koI nayA siddhAMta nikAlA hai tumane? duniyA eka hI taraha se miTa sakatI hai| nasaruddIna ne kahA-do taraha se miTegI--eka dina, jisa dina maiM marUMgA, duniyA mittegii| aura eka duniyA miTa jAe, vaha dUsarA DhaMga hai| hama saba yahI soca rahe haiM ki jisa dina maiM marUMgA, duniyA miTa jaaegii| mullA mara gayA, use loga kabra meM vidA karake vApasa lauTa rahe haiN| to rAste para eka ajanabI milA hai aura usa ajanabI ne pUchA ki vhATa vAja da kampaleMTa? mara gayA nasaruddIna, takalIpha kyA thI? zikAyata kyA thI? jisa AdamI se pUchA, usane kahA-deyara vAz2a no kampaleMTa, deyara iz2a no kmpleNtt| evarIvana iz2a kampalITalI, thArolI saittisphaaidd| koI zikAyata nahIM hai| saba saMtuSTa haiN| 261
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 mara gayA, acchA huaa| gAMva kA upadrava chuuttaa| nasaruddIna aisA nahIM soca sakatA thA kbhii| vaha to kaha rahA thA, eka daphA duniyA taba maregI, jaba maiM mruuNgaa| pralaya to ho gayI asalI, jisa dina maiM mara gyaa| __ hama saba jo kara rahe haiM, soca rahe haiM, usa karane meM koI bar3A bhArI prANa hai, koI bahuta bar3A artha hai - pAnI para lakIreM khIMca rahe haiM aura soca rahe haiM: reta para nAma likha rahe haiM aura soca rahe haiM: kAgajoM ke mahala banA rahe haiM aura soca rahe haiN| kho jAte haiM Apa kisI ko patA bhI nahIM calatA ki kaba kho ge| miTa jAte haiM Apa kisI ko patA bhI nahIM calatA ki kaba miTa ge| saMlInatA ke bAda sAdhaka apane bhItara rukakara pUche ki maiM jo kara rahA hUM isakA koI bhI artha hai? maiM jo hUM isakA koI artha hai? maiM kala miTa jAUMgA, evarIvana vila bI kampalITalI saiTisphAiDa, saba loga saMtuSTa hoNge| eka daphA dillI meM eka sarkasa ke do zera chUTa ge| bhAge to rAste para sAtha chUTa gyaa| sAta dina bAda mile to eka to sAta dina se bhUkhA thA, bahuta parezAna thA, eka puliyA ke nIce chipA rahA thaa| kucha nahIM milA usako, khAne ko bhI kucha nahIM milA, parezAna ho gyaa| aura chipe-chipe jAna nikala gyii| dUsarA lekina tagar3A, svastha dikhAI par3a rahA thA, majabUta dikhAI par3a rahA thaa| pahale siMha ne pUchA ki maiM to bar3I musIbata meM dina gujAra rahA huuN| kisI taraha sarkasa vApasa pahuMca jAUM, isakA hI rAstA khoja rahA huuN| vaha rAstA bhI nahIM mila rahA hai| mara gae, sAta dina bhUkhe rhe| tuma to bar3e prasanna, tAje aura svastha dikhAI par3a rahe ho| kahAM chipe rahe? usane kahA- 'maiM to pArliyAmeMTa hAusa meM chipA thaa|' 'khataranAka jagaha tuma gae? vahAM itanA pulisa kA paharA hai. vahAM bhojana kaise milA?' usane kahA- 'maiM roja eka minisTara ko prApta karatA rhaa|' 'yaha to bahuta DeMjarasa kAma hai| phaMsa jaaoge|' to usane kahA ki nahIM, jaise hI minisTara nadArada hotA hai, evarIvana iz2a kaMpalITalI saittisphaaidd| koI jhaMjhaTa nahIM hotI hai| no vana misesa him| koI kamI bhI anubhava nahIM krtaa| vaha jagaha itanI bar3hiyA hai ki vahAM jitane loga haiM, kisI ko bhI prApta kara jAo, bAkI loga prasanna hote haiN| tuma bhI vahIM cale clo| vahAM apane do kyA pUre sarkasa ke saba zera A jAeM to bhI bhojana hai aura kAphI dina taka rahegA kyoMki bhojana khuda pArliyAmeMTa hAusa meM Ane ko utsuka hai, pUre mulka se bhojana AtA hI rhegaa| idhara hama kitanA hI kama kareM, bhojana khuda utsuka hai| kharca karake parezAnI uThAkara AtA rhegaa| bhojana, unake lie bhojana hI hai jinako Apa ema.pI. vagairaha kahate haiN| bhojana haiN| pArliyAmeMTa hAusa meM tasvIreM laTaka rahI haiM una saba logoM kI jo socate haiM unake binA duniyA ruka jAegI, cAMda-tAre gati baMda kara deNge| kucha nahIM ruktaa| kucha patA hI nahIM calatA isa jagata meM Apa kaba kho jAte haiN| __ nizcita hI Apake kie hue kA koI bhI mUlya nahIM hai, jisakA patA calatA ho| para dUsare ke lie mUlya ho yA na ho, yaha pUchanA sAdhaka ke lie jarUrI hai ki mere lie koI mUlya hai? yaha jo kucha bhI kara rahA hUM, isakI kyA AMtarika arthavattA hai? vhATa iz2a iTsa inara signIphikeMsa? isakI mahattA aura garimA kyA hai bhItara? yaha khayAla A jAe to Apa prAyazcita kI duniyA meM praveza kreNge| __ prAyazcita kI duniyA kyA hai, yaha maiM Apase khuuN| prAyazcita kI duniyA yaha hai ki maiM jaisA bhI hUM, soyA huA hUM, maiM apane ko jagAne kA nirNaya letA huuN| prAyazcita jAgaraNa kA saMkalpa hai| pazcAttApa, soe meM kI gayI galatiyoM kA soe meM hI kSamA yAcanA hai, kSamA mAMganA hai| prAyazcita soe hue vyaktitva ko jagAne kA nirNaya hai, saMkalpa hai| maiMne jo bhI kiyA hai Aja taka, vaha galata thA kyoMki maiM galata huuN| aba maiM apane ko badalatA hUM-karmoM ko nahIM, ekzana ko nahIM, bIiMga ko| aba maiM apane ko badalatA hUM, aba maiM dUsarA hone 262
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa kI koziza karatA huuN| kyA prAyazcita kA yaha artha Apake khayAla meM AtA hai? yaha khayAla meM Ae to Apa sAdhaka bana jaaeNge| yaha khayAla meM na Ae to Apa sAdhAraNa gRhastha hoNge| pazcAttApa karate raheMge aura vahI kAma doharAte rheNge| ___ mullA nasaruddIna ke ghara ke logoM ne yaha dekhakara ki isake tarka bar3e pAgala hote jA rahe haiM, kucha ajIba bAteM kahatA hai| kahatA hai lAjikala, kahatA tarkayukta hai| pAgala kA bhI apanA lAjika hotA hai| dhyAna rahe, kaI daphe to pAgala bar3e lAjIziyana hote haiN| bar3e tarkayukta hote haiN| agara Apane kisI pAgala se tarka kiyA hai to eka bAta pakkI hai--eka bAta pakkI hai ki Apa use kanavhiMsa na kara paaeNge| isa bAta kI sambhAvanA hai ki vaha Apako kanavhiMsa kara le| magara isakI koI sambhAvanA nahIM ki Apa usako kanavhiMsa kara paaeN| kyoMki pAgala kA tarka ebsalyUTa hotA hai, pUrNa hotA hai| ___ mullA ke tarka aise hote jA rahe haiM ki ghara ke loga, mitra, parezAna ho gae haiN| eka dina mullA gAMva ke dharmazAstrI se bAta kara rahA hai| dharmazAstrI ne kahA-koI satya aisA nahIM hai jise hama pUrNatA se ghoSaNA kara skeN| mullA nasaruddIna ne kahA ki jo Apa kaha rahe haiM kyA yaha pUrNa satya hai? usane kahA--nizcita, ddephinettilii| mullA ne kahA--saba gar3abar3a ho gyaa| Apa yaha kaha rahe haiM--'kisI satya ko hama pUrNatA se ghoSita nahIM kara sakate aura aba Apa hI kaha rahe haiM--'yaha satya pUrNa hai'| mullA ko manocikitsaka ke pAsa le jAyA gayA kyoMki gAMvabhara parezAna ho gayA hai usake tarkoM se| manocikitsaka ne sAlabhara ilAja kiyaa| kahate haiM ki sAlabhara meM mullA ThIka ho gyaa| jisa dina mullA ThIka huA, manocikitsaka ne bar3I khuzI mnaayii| aura usane kahA-Aja tuma ThIka ho gae ho, yaha merI bar3I saphalatA hai kyoMki tuma jaise AdamI ko ThIka karanA asambhava kArya thaa| isa jiMdagI meM kisI ko ThIka na kiyA to clegaa| calo isa khuzI meM hama bAhara caleM-phUla khile haiM, pakSI gIta gA rahe haiM, sUraja nikalA hai, subaha suMdara hai-isa khuzI meM hama thor3A pahAr3a kI tarapha cleN| ve donoM pahAr3a kI tarapha ge| mullA hAMphane lagA, aura cikitsaka hai ki bhAgA calA jA rahA hai tejI se| Akhira mullA ne kahA ki ruko bhii| bahuta ho gyaa| agara hamArA dimAga kharAba hotA to hama tumhAre sAtha daur3a bhI lete| lekina aba ThIka ho gayA huuN| tumhIM kahate ho, to aba itanA jyAdA nhiiN| to usa cikitsaka ne kahA - mIla ke patthara ko dekho, kitane dUra aae| abhI koI jyAdA dUra nahIM aae| mullA ne dekhA aura kahA-dasa miil| usa cikitsaka ne kahA-iTa iz2a nATa so baidd| Tu Ica iTa kamsa Tu onalI phAiva maails| pAMca mIla hamako, pAMca mIla tumko| lauTane meM jyAdA dikkata nahIM hai| matalaba yaha hai ki nasaruddIna to ThIka ho gae, sAlabhara meM cikitsaka pAgala ho gyaa| dasa mIla hai lauTanA, koI harjA nahIM, pAMca-pAMca mIla par3atA hai eka-eka ke hisse meN| jyAdA burA nahIM hai| pAgala ko rAjI karanA muzkila hai| sambhAvanA yahI hai ki pAgala Apako rAjI kara le| kyoMki pAgala pUrA apanI tarapha tarka kA jAla banAkara rakhatA hai| rIz2ansa nahIM haiM ve, rezanalAijezana haiM, tarkAbhAsa haiN| tarka nahIM haiM ve, tarkAbhAsa haiN| lekina vaha banAkara rakhatA hai| __rUjavelTa kI patnI ne eka saMsmaraNa likhA hai, ilanaura rUjavelTa ne| rUjavelTa rASTrapati huA usake pahale gavarnara thA amarIkA ke eka rAjya meN| gavarnara kI patnI hone kI haisiyata se ilanaura rUjavelTa eka dina pAgalakhAne ke nirIkSaNa ko gyii| eka AdamI ne daravAje para usakA svAgata kiyaa| usane samajhA ki vaha suparinTeMDeMTa hai| vaha AdamI use le gyaa| usane tIna ghaNTe pAgalakhAne ke eka-eka pAgala ke saMbaMdha meM jo kesa, hisTrI, jo byaurA diyA, vivaraNa diyA, ilanaura hairAna ho gyii| usane calate vakta usase kahA ki tama Azcaryajanaka ho - tumhArI jAnakArI, pAgalapana ke saMbaMdha meM tumhArA anubhava, tumhArA adhyyn| tuma jitane buddhimAna AdamI se 263
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 maiM kabhI milI nhiiN| __usa AdamI ne kahA-mApha karie, Apa kucha galatI meM haiN| AI ema nATa e suparinTeMDeMTa, AI ema vana Apha inmeTsa / maiM koI suparinTeMDeMTa nhiiN| suparinTeMDeMTa Aja bAhara gayA hai| maiM to isI pAgalakhAne meM eka pAgala huuN| ilanaura ne kahA-tuma aura pAgala! tuma jaisA svastha AdamI maiMne nahIM dekhaa| kisane tumheM pAgala kiyA hai? kahA-yahI to maiM samajhA rahA hai. Aja sAta sAla ho gae samajhAte. lekina koI sanatA nhiiN| koI mAnane ko rAjI nhiiN| aba koI pAgala kahe, maiM pAgala nahIM, kauna mAnane ko rAjI hai| suparinTeMDeMTa kahatA hai ki sabhI pAgala yahI kahate haiM ki hama pAgala nahIM haiN| isameM kyA khAsa bAta hai? ___ rUjavelTa kI patnI ne kahA-yaha to bahuta burA mAmalA hai| tuma ghabarAo mata, maiM jAkara gavarnara ko Aja hI kahUMgI, kala hI tumhArI chuTTI ho jaaegii| tuma ekadama svastha AdamI ho sAdhAraNa nahIM, asAdhAraNa rUpa se buddhimAna AdamI ho| tumako kauna pAgala kahatA hai? agara tuma pAgala ho to hama saba pAgala haiN| pAgala ne kahA-yahI to maiM samajhAtA hUM, lekina koI mAnatA nhiiN| ilanaura ne kahA ki tuma bilakula bephikra rho| maiM Aja hI jAkara bAta karatI huuN| kala subaha hI tuma mukta ho jaaoge| namaskAra karake, dhanyavAda dekara ilanaura mur3I, usa pAgala ne ucakakara jora se lAta mArI ilanaura kI pITha pr| sAta-ATha sIr3hiyAM vaha nIce dhar3Ama se jAkara girii| bahuta ghabarAkara utthii| usane kahA-tumane yaha kyA kiyA? yaha tumane kiyA kyA? usa pAgala ne kahA-jasTa Tu rimAiMDa yuu| bhUla mata jaanaa| gavarnara ko kaha denA ki kala subaha...jasTa Tu rimAiMDa yuu| magara vaha tIna ghaNTe para pAnI phira gyaa| to tIna ghaNTe jo vaha bola rahA thA, usameM kyA vaha ThIka bola sakatA hai? savAla yaha hai| kyA usa tIna ghaNTe meM vaha ThIka bola sakatA hai? nahIM, vaha ThIka bolane kA sirpha AbhAsa paidA kara sakatA hai-AbhAsa, phailisii| tarkAbhAsa paidA kara sakatA hai| lekina asaliyata yaha nahIM ho sakatI ki jo vaha bola rahA hai vaha ThIka ho| aisA dikhAI par3a sakatA hai ki bilakula ThIka hai| Apa pakar3a na pAeM ki usameM galatI kahAM hai, yaha dUsarI bAta hai| lekina koI na koI ghar3I vaha pragaTa kara degaa| soyA haA AdamI bhI isI taraha kara rahA hai| dinabhara bilakula ThIka hai, jarA krodha nahIM kara rahA hai| acAnaka eka rasIda kara detA hai cAMTA apane lar3ake ko ki tU dera se kyoM AyA? Apa nahIM samajhate, Apa kahate haiM yaha AdamI bilakula ThIka hai, bAkI vakta to ThIka hI rahatA hai| yaha isakA cAMTA batAtA hai ki bAkI vakta yaha sirpha tarkAbhAsa paidA karatA hai| yaha ThIka nahIM rahatA, yaha ThIka raha nahIM sktaa| kyoMki usa ThIka AdamI se jo yaha nikala rahA hai, yaha nikala nahIM sktaa| eka AdamI ekadama chAtI meM churA mAra detA hai, kisI ko hama kahate haiM kala taka bilakula bhalA AdamI thA-ekadama bhalA AdamI thaa| mAnA ki bilakula bhalA thA, lekina vaha AbhAsa thaa| soyA huA AdamI acche kA sirpha AbhAsa paidA karatA hai| burA honA usakI niyati hai| vaha usase pragaTa hogA hii| kSaNa do kSaNa roka sakatA hai, idhara-udhara DAMvAMDola kara sakatA hai, lekina vaha usase pragaTa hogA hii| patA hai ki Apa apane ko pare vakta saMbhAlakara calate haiM? jo Apake bhItara hai usako dabAkara calate haiM? jo Apa kahanA cAhate haiM vaha nahIM kahate, kucha aura kahate haiN| jo Apa batAnA cAhate haiM nahIM batAte, kucha aura batAte haiN| lekina kabhI-kabhI vaha ubhara jAtA hai| havA kA koI jhoMkA aura kapar3A uTha jAtA hai, bhItara jo hai vaha dikha jAtA hai, koI pristhiti| taba Apa kahate haiM, 264
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa yaha karma kI bhUla hai, paristhiti kI nhiiN| paristhiti ne to kevala avasara diyA hai ki Apake bhItara jo Apa chipA-chipAkara cala rahe the vaha pragaTa ho gyaa| prAyazcita taba zurU hogA jaba Apa jaise haiM, apane ko vaisA jaaneN| chipAeM mata, DhAMkeM mata, to Apa pAeMge, Apa ubalate hue lAvA haiM, jvAlAmukhI haiN| ye saba bahAne haiM Apake, ye TIma-TAma haiN| ye Upara se cipakAye hue palastara haiM, ye bahuta patale haiN| yaha sirpha dikhAvA hai| isa dikhAve ke bhItara jo Apa haiM, usako Apa svIkAra kreN| prAyazcita kA pahalA sUtra-jo Apa haiM--bure bhale, niMdA-yogya, pApI, beImAna--eksepTa itt| Apa aise haiN| tathya kI svIkRti prAyazcita hai| tathya galatI se ho gayA, isako poMcha denA pazcAttApa hai| tathya huA, hotA hI hai mujhase; jaisA maiM AdamI hUM, yahI mujhase hotA--isakI svIkRti prAyazcita kA prAraMbha hai| svIkAra, aura pUrNa svIkAra, kahIM bhI koI cunAva nhiiN| kyoMki cunAva Apane kiyA to Apa badalate rheNge| Aja yaha, kala vaha, parasoM vaha, ApakI badalAhaTa jArI rhegii| prAyazcita pUrNa svIkAra hai, maiM aisA huuN| maiM cora hUM, to maiM cora huuN| maiM beImAna hUM to maiM beImAna hUM / nahIM jarUrata hai ki Apa ghoSaNA karane jAeM ki maiM beImAna hUM kyoMki akasara aisA hotA hai ki agara Apa ghoSaNA kareM ki maiM beImAna hUM to loga samajheMge ki bar3e ImAnadAra haiN| mujhe logoM ne bhagavAna kahanA zurU kiyaa| maiM cupa rahA bahuta dina taka, maiMne socA ki maiM kahUM ki bhagavAna nahIM hUM to unakA aura pakkA bharosA baiTha jAegA ki yahI to lakSaNa hai bhagavAna kA, ki vaha inakAra kre| vaha inakAra kare ki maiM nahIM haiN| hamArA mana bar3A ajIba hai| agara Apako kisI ko saca meM hI beImAnI karake dhokhA denA ho to Apa pahale usako batA deM ki maiM bahuta burA AdamI hUM, maiM bahuta beImAna huuN| vaha Apa para jyAdA bharosA karegA, Apa beImAnI jyAdA AsAnI se kara skeNge| aura jaba Apa ghoSaNA karate haiM ki beImAna hUM taba dekhanA ki isameM koI rasa to nahIM A rahA hai, kyoMki dUsare ke sAmane ghoSaNA meM isameM bhI rasa A sakatA hai| manovaijJAnika kahate haiM ki liyo TAlasTAya ne apanI AtmakathA meM jitane pApa likhe haiM, utane usane kie nahIM the| usameM bahuta se pApa kalpita haiM, jo usane ghoSaNA karane ke lie likhe| kie nahIM the, Apa soca sakate haiM? puNyoM kI koI ghoSaNA kare ki maiMne itanA dAna kiyA to Apa kaheMge ki yaha ghoSaNA ho sakatI hai| lekina koI kahe ki maiMne itanI corI kI, yaha bhI ghoSaNA ho sakatI hai? koI aisA karegA? Apane kabhI socA hai ki koI apane pApa kI bhI carcA karegA, itane jora se? nahIM, pApI karate haiN| lekina TAlasTAya jaise loga nahIM krte| jelakhAne meM Apa jAie, jisane dasa rupae kI corI kI hai, vaha kahatA hai dasa lAkha kA DAkA ddaalaa| kyoMki dasa kI bhI koI corI karane kA matalaba hai? to dasa ke hI cora haiM! yaha koI matalaba nahIM hai| eka kaidI kArAgRha meM praviSTa huaa| dUsare kaidI ne, jo vahAM sIkhacoM se Tikakara baiThA thA, usane kahA-kitane dina kI sajA? usane kahA ki cAlIsa sAla kI sjaa| to usane kahA ki tU daravAje ke pAsa baitth| hama dIvAra ke pAsa rheNge| pahale AdamI ne pUchA, 'kyoM?' usane kahA-hamako pacahattara sAla kI sajA milI hai| to terA maukA pahale AegA nikalane kaa| sikkhar3a mAlUma par3atA hai| cAlIsa sAla kI kula! choTA-moTA kAma kiyA! hamako pacahattara sAla kI sajA hai| hama dIvAra ke pAsa raheMge, tU daravAje ke paas| terA maukA nikalane kA pahale aaegaa| cAlIsa sAla hI kA to mAmalA hai| hamako aura Age paiMtIsa sAla rahanA hai| isakA matalaba hai ki unhoMne mAsTarI siddha kara dI ki aba tU isa kamare meM ziSya banakara raha / to jelakhAnoM meM to ghoSaNA calatI hai| lekina yaha kabhI khayAla nahIM AtA sAdhAraNataH ki sAdhu-saMtoM ne bhI jitane pApoM kI carcA kI hai, utane vastutaH kie haiN| yA pApa kI ghoSaNA meM bhI rasa ho sakatA hai? manovaijJAnika kahate haiM - rasa ho sakatA hai| isa hisAba se hisAba nahIM lagAe gae haiM kbhii| gAMdhI kI AtmakathA kA kabhI na 265
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 kabhI manovizleSaNa honA cAhie ki unhoMne jitane pApoM kI apane bacapana meM bAta kI hai utane kie? yA usameM kucha kalpita haiN| jarUrI nahIM hai ki ve jhUTha bola rahe hoN| AdamI kA mana aisA hai ki vaha mAna rahA ho ki jo vaha kaha rahA hai, usane kiyA, yaha jarUrI nahIM hai| to vaha jAnakara likha rahe hoM ki yaha maiMne kiyA nahIM aura likha rahA huuN| nahIM, bahuta bAra doharA-doharAkara unako bhI rasa A gayA ho aura lagatA ho, kiyA hai| Apa bahuta-sI aisI smRtiyAM banAe hue haiM jo Apane kabhI kI nahIM, jo kabhI huA nhiiN| lekina Apane bharosA kara liyA hai, mAnakara baiTha gae haiM aura dhIre-dhIre rAjI ho gae haiN| liyo TAlasTAya ne itane pApa nahIM kie aisA manasvidoM kA kahanA hai, para usane ghoSaNA kI hai| nahIM to maiM yaha nahIM kaha rahA ki prAyazcita karanevAlA ghoSaNA kare jAkara ki maiM pApI haiM yoMki ghoSaNA meM bhI khatarA hai| nahIM, prAyazcita karanevAlA apane hI samakSa svIkAra kare ki maiM aisA huuN| kisI ke sAmane kahane kI jarUrata nhiiN| isalie dUsarA pharka Apako batAtA huuN| pazcAttApa dUsare ke sAmane pragaTa karanA par3atA hai, prAyazcita svayaM ke smkss| pazcAttApa svayaM ke samakSa karane kA to koI matalaba nhiiN| kyoMki kisI ko gAlI to dI dUsare ke samakSa aura kSamA mAMga liyA apane mana meN| isakA kyA matalaba hai| jaba gAlI dene dUsare ke pAsa gae the to kSamA mAMgane dUsare ke pAsa jAnA pdd'egaa| karma to dUsare se saMbaMdhita hotA hai isalie pazcAttApa dUsare se saMbaMdhita hogaa| lekina ApakI sattA to kisI se saMbaMdhita nahIM, Apase hI saMbaMdhita hai| usakI ghoSaNA dUsare ke sAmane karanA anAvazyaka hai| aura usameM rasa leM to khatarA hai| apane hI samakSa- prAyazcita apane samakSa, apane hI samakSa ughAr3akara dekhanA hai apanI pUrI nagnatA ko ki maiM kyA huuN| __ aura dhyAna rakheM, dUsare ke samakSa sadA Dara hai badalAhaTa karane kA, kucha aura batA dene kaa| isalie koI bhI AdamI saccI DAyarI nahIM likha paataa| bhalA vaha dUsare ko par3hane ke lie na likha rahA ho, lekina phira bhI koI bhI AdamI saccI DAyarI nahIM likha pAtA, kyoMki dUsarA par3ha sakatA hai, isakI sambhAvanA to sadA hI banI rahatI hai| isalie saba DAyarIja phAlsa hotI haiM, jhUTha hotI haiN| agara Apane DAyarI likhI hai to Apa bhalIbhAMti jAnate haiM usameM Apa kitanA chor3a dete haiM jo likhA jAnA cAhie thA; kitanA jor3a dete haiM, jo nahIM thA; kitanA saMbhAla dete haiM, jaisI ki bAta nahIM thii| lekina yaha bhI ho sakatA hai, isase ulTA bhI ho sakatA hai ki jo pApa bahuta choTA thA, usako Apa bahuta bar3A karake likheN| agara Apako pApa kI ghoSaNA karanI hai| to vaha bhI ho sakatA hai| _AgasTIna kI kitAba 'kanaphezaMsa' saMdigdha hai ki usameM usane jo likhA hai, saba huA ho| pApa kI bhI sImA hai| pApa bhI Apa asIma nahIM kara sakate, pApa kI bhI sImA hai| aura AdamI kI sAmarthya hai pApa karane kii| yaha AdamI pApa se bhI Uba jAtA hai aura usakA bhI secyurezana pvAiMTa hai| vahAM bhI zakti rikta ho jAtI hai aura AdamI lauTa par3atA hai| lekina dUsare kA khayAla ho agara mana meM to raddobadala kA Dara hai, vaha ApakA soyA huA mana kucha kara sakatA hai| isalie prAyazcita hai svayaM ke smkss| isakA dUsare se koI bhI lenA-denA nahIM hai| ___ aura dhyAna rahe, mahAvIra prAyazcita ko itanA mUlya de pAe, kyoMki paramAtmA ko unhoMne koI jagaha nahIM dI; nahIM to pazcAttApa hI raha jAtA, prAyazcita nahIM ho sakatA thaa| kyoMki jaba paramAtmA dekhanevAlA maujUda hai-dena iTa iz2a Alavez2a phAra sama vana els| cAhe AdamI ke lie na bhI ho, lekina jaba eka IsAI phakIra ekAMta meM bhI kaha rahA hai ki he prabhu! mere pApa haiM ye, to dUsarA maujUda hai, dI adara iz2a prejeNtt| vaha paramAtmA hI sahI, lekina dUsare kI maujUdagI hai| mahAvIra kahate haiM-koI paramAtmA nahIM hai jisake samakSa tuma pragaTa kara rahe ho, tuma hI ho| mahAvIra ne vyakti ko itanA jyAdA svayaM kI niyati nirNIta kiyA hai, jisakA hisAba nhiiN| tuma hI 266
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________________ prAyazcita : pahalA aMtara tapa ho, koI nahIM, koI AkAza meM sunanevAlA nahIM jisase tuma kaho ki mere pApa kSamA kara denaa| koI kSamA karegA nahIM, koI hai nhiiN| cillAnA mata, ghoSaNA se kucha bhI na hogaa| dayA kI bhikSA mata mAMganA, kyoMki koI dayA nahIM ho sktii| koI dayA karanevAlA nahIM hai| prAyazcita-nahIM, dUsare ke samakSa nahIM, apane hI samakSa apane naraka kI svIkRti hai| aura jaba pUrNa svIkRti hotI hai bhItara, to usa pUrNa svIkRti se hI rUpAMtaraNa zurU ho jAtA hai| yaha bahuta kaThina mAlUma par3egA ki pUrNa svIkRti se kyoM zurU ho jAtA hai? jaise hI koI vyakti apane ko pUrA svIkAra karatA hai usakI purAnI imeja, usakI purAnI pratimA khaNDa-khaNDa hokara gira jAtI hai, rAkha ho jAtI hai| aura aba vaha jaisA apane ko pAtA hai, aisA apane ko kSaNabhara bhI dekha nahIM sakatA, badalegA hI aura upAya nahIM hai| jaise ghara meM Aga laga gaI ho aura patA cala gayA ki Aga laga gaI, taba Apa yaha na kaheMge ki aba hama soceMge, bAhara nikalanA hai ki nhiiN| taba Apa yaha na kaheMge ki guru khojeMge, ki mArga kyA hai? taba Apa yaha na kaheMge ki pahale bAhara kucha hai bhI pAne yogya ki hama ghara chor3akara nikala jAeM aura bAhara bhI kucha na mile| ye saba usa AdamI kI bAteM haiM jisake mana meM kahIM-na-kahIM khayAla banA hai ki ghara meM koI Aga nahIM lgii| eka bAra dikha jAeM lapaTeM cAroM tarapha, AdamI bAhara ho jAtA hai| jampa, chalAMga laga jAtI hai| ___ mullA nasaruddIna kI patnI kA Aparezana huaa| to jaba use Aparezana kI Tebala para liTAyA gayA to khir3akiyoM ke bAhara vRkSoM meM phUla khile hue haiM, iMdradhanuSa phailA huA hai| jaba usakA Aparezana ho gayA aura usake muMha se kapar3A uThAyA gayA to usane dekhA ki saba parde baMda haiM, khir3akiyAM, dvAra-daravAje baMda haiM, to usane mullA se pUchA ki suMdara subaha thI, kyA sAMjha ho gaI yA rAta ho gaI? itanI dera laga gaI? mullA ne kahA-rAta nahIM huI hai, pAMca minaTa huaa| to usane kahA-ye daravAje kyoM baMda haiM? to mullA ne kahA-bAhara ke makAna meM Aga laga gaI hai| aura hama Dare ki agara kahIM tU hoza meM Ae aura ekadama dekhe Aga lagI, to samajhe ki naraka meM pahuMca gae haiN| isalie hamane khir3akiyAM baMda kara dI ki naraka meM Aga jalatI rahatI hai to tU kahIM yaha na soca le ki mara gae khtm| kabhI aisA ho jAtA hai ki soca liyA ki mara gae to AdamI mara bhI jAtA hai| to mullA ne kahA- yaha maiMne baMda kI haiM khir3akiyAM, aura makAna meM Aga laga gayI hai bAhara / ___ mullA ke khuda ke jIvana meM aisA ghaTA ki vaha behoza ho gayA aura logoM ne samajhA ki mara gyaa| usakI arthI bAMdha hI rahe the ki vaha hoza meM A gyaa| logoM ne kahA- are, tuma mare nahIM! mullA ne kahA-maiM marA nahIM, aura jitanI dera tuma samajha rahe the ki maiM mara gayA, utanI dera bhI maiM marA huA nahIM thaa| mujhe patA thA ki maiM jiMdA huuN| to unhoMne kahA- tuma bilakula behoza the, tumheM patA kaise ho sakatA hai| kyA tumheM patA thA? kyA pramANa tumhAre bhItara thA ki tuma jiMdA ho? usane kahA-pramANa yaha thA ki maiM bhUkhA thA, mujhe bhUkha lagI thii| agara svarga meM pahuMca gayA hotA to kalpavRkSa ke nIce bhUkha khatma ho gaI hotii| aura paira meM mujhe ThaMDaka laga rahI thii| agara naraka meM pahuMca gayA hotA to vahAM ThaMDaka kahAM hai, aura do hI jagaheM haiM jAne ko| mujhe patA thA ki maiM jiMdA huuN| __ mullA ke gAMva kA eka nAstika mara gayA-vaha akelA nAstika thaa| vaha mara gayA to mullA usako bidA karane gyaa| vaha leTA huA hai| sUTa suMdara use pahanA diyA gayA thA, TAI-vAI bAMdha dI gayI thI--saba bilakula taiyaar| mullA ne bar3e dukha se kahA, puara maina! thArolI DresDa aiMDa no vheara Tu go? nAstika thA, na naraka jA sakatA thA, na svrg| kyoMki mAnatA hI nhiiN| to mullA ne kahA-itane bilakula taiyAra leTe ho, garIba becArA aura jAnA usako kahIM bhI nahIM hai| __vaha jo hamAre bhItara Aga hai, naraka hai, jahAM hama khar3e hI haiN| naraka jAne ko jagaha nahIM hai koI, vahAM hama khar3e hue haiM, vaha hamArI sthiti hai| svarga koI sthAna nahIM hai| isalie mahAvIra pahale AdamI haiM isa pRthvI para jinhoMne kahA ki svarga aura naraka manodazAeM 267
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________________ mahAvIra-vANI bhAga : 1 haiM, mAiMDa sTeTsa haiM, cittadazAeM haiN| mokSa koI sthAna nahIM hai isalie mahAvIra ne kahA ki vaha sthAna ke bAhara hai-biyANDa spesa / na nahIM hai. vaha sirpha eka avasthA hai| lekina jahAM hama khaDe haiM. vaha naraka hai| isa naraka kI pratIti jitanI spaSTa ho jAe utane Apa prAyazcita meM utreNge| aura jitanI pragAr3ha-inaTeMsa ho jAe, ki Aga jalane lage Apake cAroM tarapha to chalAMga laga jaaegii| aura rUpAMtaraNa zurU ho jaaegaa| usa chalAMga ke pAMca sUtra hama kala se dhIre-dhIre zurU kreNge| yaha pahalA sUtra hai aura ThIka se samajha lenA jarUrI hai| saMlInatA jaise aMtima sUtra hai bAhya-tapa kA, aura kImatI hai, usake bAda hI prAyazcita ho sakatA hai| prAyazcita bahuta kImatI hai kyoMki vaha pahalA sUtra hai aMtara-tapa kaa| agara Apa prAyazcita nahIM kara sakate to aMtara-tapa meM koI praveza nahIM hai, vaha dvAra hai| Aja itanA hii| rukeM pAMca minaTa, kIrtana kareM...! 268