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aparigrana remember simple living and self-restraint.
My mother is a person of simple living. She doesn't believe in stocking too much. She believes in giving it away to people. So aparigraha is basically not accumulating more than what you require. You may take as much as you need. So that I have taught my children, too.... You don't need to waste things. Resources should be for everyone.... They wouldn't understand the concept of accumulation of wealth, but they would understand that there are limited resources and they should be made available to everyone. That kind of thing would speak to them.
Another woman expresses her different view:
Actually, I don't think too much about aparigraha to be honest. I'm very fond of things. I'm fond of so many clothes. I've always preferred the latest and the best thing to be used. Yes, but I always prefer this-If I buy something new for myself, two clothes for myself, then I should give two clothes from my wardrobe to the person who requires it-not in a bad condition, but in a very good condition....That kind of aparigraha I can do, otherwise I don't teach that-don't use this much, only take this much, because [I] myself [am] not like this, so I cannot teach [it to my kids.
Her son nevertheless has learned to be generous:
If he sees any rickshaw wälä. He sees that he is asking for the ten rupees, he always tries to give 20 rupees. He never bargains with the rickshaw wālā. He never bargains with the poor people.
There were other examples mentioned in the process of limiting possessions, including the number of saris owned and the number of toys allowed to children. One family required four children to share only one toy. There were also extraordinary instances of self-sacrifice
The Practice and Instruction of Jain principles... 5
related. For example, an elder sister remained single and worked diligently to pay for the weddings of five younger sisters before getting married herself.
Aparigraha also is seen as applying to the relationship between husbands and wives, particularly in respect for each other's careers and in caring for home and family. One female householder reported that she had been invited to the United States to participate in an academic conference. As her son was still very young, she wrote a letter to the inviting university politely refusing the invitation. Her husband saw the letter on the table and asked why she would not go. When she explained she felt she needed to stay home with her child, her husband exclaimed, "What? So, I can leave my son with you, but you cannot leave your son with me!":17
Teaching Anekāntavāda-Non-absolutism—by Example and by Precept
Several householders were confused by the term 'anekantavāda'-a Jain philosophical term for the practice of non-absolutism or being open-minded to a multi-faceted perspective. When given the definition, the householder recognized it generally as a Jain principle and most were able to come up with several examples of how anekāntavāda is practiced in their homes, and were quite nhilosophical themselves in their responses: