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life without Conflict
life without Conflict
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of punya may end up spending several lifetimes together. You know that Lord Neminath and Rajul were together for nine life times, and it would be a different matter if that were the case with you. But here you do not have a clue about your next life. People separate and go their own way just in this life, do they not? They call it divorce, do they not? Just in this life, some may have two or three husbands.
The Way To Improve Other In This Era
You should not try to improve her and neither should she try to improve you. Whatever you have is gold. No one's prakruti ever improves; a dog's tail will always remain crooked so you must exercise caution. Regardless of your wife's personality, accept her as she is and adjust everywhere.
If an occasion for reprimanding arises but you do not say anything, then she will improve. A person, who does not lose his temper or get angry, has tremendous influence. I never get angry with anyone or tell off anyone. Yet people are in awe and have reverence for me.
Questioner: So then will she improve Dada?
Dadashri: This verily has always been the way to improve others. In this Kaliyug, people find it hard to follow this. There is no other alternative.
Questioner: But that is very difficult.
Dadashri: No, it is not difficult. It is the easiest way. A cow has to bear the weight of its own horns.
Questioner: But she will also attack us with her horns, will she not?
Dadashri: Sometimes you may get hurt. If there is
likelihood of getting hurt by her horns, then you can move out of the way. In the same way, you should move away when it comes to your wife too. Where do your problems lie? It is in your belief: 'I married her and she is my wife.' Look, there is no such thing as wife and there is no such thing as husband. Since there is no husband to begin with, how can there be a wife? These are all acts of ignorance. Where is the trace of Arya culture nowadays?
Improve Your Self Only Questioner: Is it not possible to improve my wife if, in all situations, I accept that I am the one with mistakes?
Dadashri: You have to improve yourself if you want to improve others. No one can be improved. Those who try to improve others are all egotistic. If you improve yourself, the other person will improve without fail. I have seen men who have set out to improve others and yet their own wife or mother have no respect for them. What kind of men are these? First improve yourself. It is wrong egoism to say or believe you can improve others. When you yourself have no worth, what are you going to do for others? It is necessary for you to become wise first. Lord Mahavir only expended energies in trying to become ‘Mahavir' (The Great One) and that is only why millions feel his presence even today. Even now, after twenty-five hundred years that impression is still strong. I do not try to improve anyone.
Everyone Is A Top What right do you have to improve others? What right do you have to improve one that has a soul? If this cloth gets dirty, you have the right to clean it, because there will be no reaction from it. But where there is a soul, there will be