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life without Conflict
life without Conflict
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Dadashri: How long can a person fight with a wall? If you were to run into a wall, what should you do to it? Should you fight with it? Similarly those with whom you come into conflict are walls. What should you do in that situation? Recognize and accept they are walls. Then there will be no problems.
Questioner: If we remain silent, the other person may mistake our silence as admission of our guilt and in turn may fight even harder.
Dadashri: This is your belief only. If a man gets up to go to the bathroom in the night and bumps into the wall, does that mean that the wall bumped into him because he remained silent?
Whether you say something or not has no bearing on anything. It is not true that your silence has any effect on the other person and neither is it true that your speech has any effect either. Everything is simply interplay of scientific circumstantial evidences. No one has even the slightest authority or power in this world, so who is going to get away with anything? If this wall had the power to do anything, then so would the body. Do we have the authority or the power to fight with this wall? In the same way, what is the point of getting angry and fighting with people? The other person definitely does not have the independent control or power, so why don't you also become like the wall? When you scold your wife, the God within her makes a note of what you are doing. If she starts to scold you, you should become like the wall, and the God within you will help you.
Fault Is Of the Sufferer Questioner: Some people just do not understand, no
matter how nicely you interact with them.
Dadashri: If they do not understand, then the fault is yours. Why did you get such a person with limited understanding? Why is it only you had to have an encounter with such a person? Anytime you have to suffer, know that it is the consequence of your own mistakes.
Questioner: So do I have to accept that such is my own karma?
Dadashri: Definitely. If there is no mistake on your part, you will not have to suffer anything. There is nobody in this world that can hurt you in the slightest but if someone does, then it is because of your own mistake. The other person is simply instrumental in the process of your own unfolding karma. Therefore the fault is of the sufferer.
A husband and wife get into a big row with each other and then retire to bed. The wife is sleeping soundly and snores while the husband tosses and turns in bed. Understand that the husband is the one at fault because he is the one suffering, not the wife. The one who is at fault is the one who suffers. If he falls asleep and the wife cannot, then recognize that she is the one at fault. Fault is of the sufferer.
This science is extraordinary. What I am telling you is a very subtle science. The whole world blames only the apparent doer (nimit).
Husband - Wife This world is very vast but people do not perceive it that way. For some their home is the entire world to them. There is nothing wrong in thinking that way, but even in his home, he fights with his wife. You fool she is not your