Harmony in Marriage

SR No.: 007548
Original Sutra Author: N/A
Author: Dada Bhagwan
Publisher: Dada Bhagwan Foundation
Publication Year: 2001
Total Pages: 69
Language: English
Classification: Book_English & Akram Vigyan
File Size: 9 KB

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Harmony in Marriage
Harmony in Marriage
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compromise. He refuses to compromise.
Dadashri: Yes that means the limit has been reached. If only the wife has to compromise and you don't, then your limit has been reached. A gentleman on the other hand would make a statement that would make his wife happy. In this manner he would move forward, but you conduct yourself in such a way that for weeks and months things remain stagnant. Nothing gets resolved. Unless there is closure in the mind of the opposing party, you will have difficulties. So compromise.
How can you accept this discord at home? When the wife says, "I am yours" and the husband says, “I am yours", where is the room for discord? As problems between the two of you increase, the separation between you starts. There is pain in separation. Everyone has problems, not just you. Anyone who gets married will have such problems. After these problems are solved, you will not feel mentally separated. Any sense of separation causes pain.
How can you have problems with your wife? A person with whom... Do you have a double bed or a single?
Questioner: No please forgive me. We only have one bed.
Dadashri: Then if you quarrel with her, what will you do if she kicks you out of the bed?
Questioner: The floor.
Dadashri: So keep one-ness with her. If you quarrel with your wife, and if you don't keep one-ness with her, where else will you keep it? What does one-ness mean? It means never to have discord. This is the one person with whom you have to decide, "There shall be no discord between you and
l'. You need to keep that much one-ness. Have you ever kept this kind of one-ness?
Questioner: I have never thought like this before. This is the first time I am thinking.
Dadashri: Yes, you will have to think, wouldn't you? God did so much thinking and then attained moksh.
Talk about this matter, some things can be resolved. It is due to a favourable opportunity that you have come together here in front of me. Therefore, do some talking. What is wrong in that? We are all one. You feel a sense of separation because of your intellect, which makes you see it as different. But in fact all is one. Man's intellect is the problem. Is this intellect in operation in your dealings with your wife?
Questioner: Yes that is what happens.
Dadashri: What causes this sense of separation with the wife? Intellect.
When a man and his wife both fight with a neighbour, they unite against the neighbour. When you see both of them raise their fists at the neighbour, you think, "Wow what oneness! This corporation is united. But when they get back into their house and when they fight each other he would say, "Go back to your parents home. I do not want you at all!" Now isn't this lack of understanding? What do you think? The two were united, that unity broke down and now separation is starting between the two. So even with the wife it becomes *mine and yours.' He would accuse her 'You're like this and you're like that... and she responds 'when have you ever been straight?' So even at home it becomes 'mine and yours'.
*Me and you, me and you, me and you!' In the past it