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there is a possibility that they can be altered and strengthened. This changing aspect of relationships is the focal point of this chapter.
The Dependence of the Child
To understand the possibility of change in a relationship, we have to understand the notion of surrender. Change and surrender are connected in a strange relationship with each other. The sculptor can make a statue out of stone because stone has the quality of surrender. Bringing about change in someone is not possible unless that person surrenders. Complete surrender is a prerequisite for change.
The being that enters the womb surrenders to the mother completely. His life in the womb is one of dependence. As a soul, he is always independent, but everything else about him, including the way his personality will develop, is dependent on the mother for the next nine months. At this time, he only knows to receive;
he receives everything from food to thoughts,
and the womb becomes his universe and school where the teacher is his mother. He hears what his mother hears, sees what she sees, tastes what she tastes, and experiences his mother's touch. He is also influenced by her thoughts and emotions.
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The Potential of the Mother
Before entrusting someone with a task, we need to check whether he is adept at it and if he requires any training or mentoring to complete the task satisfactorily. Similarly, spiritual practice is essential for successful motherhood. The mother has a two-fold
responsibility before her - creating and nurturing her child.
Roles performed by humans can be understood by using two terms - duty and responsibility. A duty is something we perform because we owe it to someone, while responsibility is something we own up to. We may do our duty without any self-interest, but responsibility is an act of will. When we perform our duty with commitment and care, then we are taking on the responsibility of doing it. A tree offers shade without any
thought or volition. But to build a roof as a shelter for people is an act of responsibility. It indicates an inner sensitivity. Motherhood and fatherhood are states which are considered higher than duty and responsibility.
They are guided by divinity. The parents who have the potential to create an epoch-hero in nine months are an epitome of this mantra Matru devo bhava, Pitru devo bhava'- which means that the mother and father can become god-like. This ideal